#thank you to the several people that pointed out the misspelling- i have no excuse im taking the L for this one guys!

[chushanye]

Zack pulling an absolute BIG BRAIN move tricking Brennan into dropping the charm & fear effect- PEAK cinema. PEAK performance. PEAK strategy. PEAK improv. the energy at the table was exhilarating. the was Emily and Siobhan were BUZZING with excitement. like teens anticipating a prank on their teacher. the way Brennan falls back in his chair, defeated. the way everyone celebrates. delicious. ineffable.

[ace-nlis]

How they met you & fell in love

a/n: This is the first time I decided to actually write something with the intention of posting it. I hope that whoever reads this enjoys it. I'm sorry if I've misspelled anything, English isn't my first language. I hope I did well for my first writing post >.<

WARNINGS: none apart from slight violence. Female reader. Cussing.

Otherwise; fluffy content.

(Y/n) - Your name

(L/n) - Last name

Like or repost if you enjoy <3

Akaashi:

When you first met him, you thought he was a pretty boy with a resting bitch face. He is an extremely straight forward 'say it how it is' type of person and you respected him for that because it isn’t always easy to just speak your mind upfront in this day and age. He didn’t really look all that friendly or approachable, but since you were friends with Bokuto you just had to suck it up and stick around. It was pretty awkward talking to him or even just being around him at first, until you realized that his exterior was an act and he’s a total softy when he isn’t trying to call Bo out on his bullshit. You found him to be an intriguing person, but also rather intimidating. He was peaceful, he didn’t talk all that much and kept to himself like a true introvert. You were the opposite, more of an ambivert type. You tried your best to befriend him, but little did you know that friendship would spiral into something else along the line.

After a while of being friends, Akaashi got red in the ears in your presence. He was easily flustered around you, and the both of you often tended to flirt and bicker as if it was second nature. The two of you in a room together never got boring. Everyone around you could tell the two of you were head over heels for each other. You thought the opposite though, you felt that the friendship was never going to progress into anything more and that your crush was meaningless because nothing would come of it. After being friends for several months, nearly reaching the 1 year milestone, you eventually started to distance yourself.

You always thought the way Akaashi acted around you was purely just because the two of you had a close bond as friends, nothing more, nothing less. Akaashi on the other hand was devastated when he noticed the drastic changes in the close bond you both shared. He noticed that whenever he walked into a room, you’d disappear. Whenever he tried to call you, you wouldn’t answer the phone and make up some excuse that you were busy. The poor guy felt like his sanity was hanging on a thread and all he wanted was to speak to you, figure out what he did wrong and at least go back to how things once were. One day, he cornered you in an empty classroom. His eyes seemed frantic and he made sure to trap you between his arms and leave no room for you to escape so he could get answers. “(Y/n), are you okay? Why have you been avoiding me? Did I do something wrong?”

It seemed like the questions that were wracking his brain kept tumbling out, and in an overwhelmed panic she stopped him. The next thing the both of them knew was that her lips were pressed to his. At first his eyes were wide and body was stiff with shock. He didn’t know how to respond, and he firmly believed that this was a dream. In her mind, she thought she had just made the biggest mistake of her life because he wasn’t responding to it, he was just standing there and embarrassment slowly started to flood her. Before she could pull away from him, his arms slackened and his hands slid down the wall beside her, eventually placing them on her hips and pulling her body flush against his while kissing her back feverishly. When the two pulled away, they were out of breath and their eyes had a dazed look in them as they locked eyes. He leaned his head against hers and sighed in relief, his arms wrapped tightly around her waist as he kept his eyes locked on hers. I think that’s when you both knew that there was no way in hell you’d let go of each other at any point in time because it really felt like you were meant to be together.

Oikawa:

You knew of Oikawa Tooru but you never actually wanted to be acquainted with him. To you he sounded like a total sleazebag, a player that loved breaking female students’ hearts left and right. Unfortunately for you, you just so happened to bump into him on Valentines day after having to reject a poor freshman. When you bumped into Oikawa, he thought that you were another girl ready to confess to him due to the box of chocolates in your hands and a smirk instantly made its way onto his face as he reached over to take the box. Your immediate response was to slap his hand away. If looks could kill, he sure as hell would be more than 6 feet under because you were not up for anyone's bullshit. Oikawa gasped in shock and retracted his hand immediately with a pout. “Hey! I know you. You’re (L/n), hmm. Aren’t you a friend of Iwa? You know, you don’t have to be embarrassed about trying to confess to me. I always appreciate a new follower.”

A mix between a scoff and a laugh of disbelief made its way out of you as you immediately shoved the box of chocolates into your bag. “Wow, I knew you were vain but I guess I underestimated just how much. If you think I have any interest in an asshole like you then you must be smoking something. I have no interest in being one of your petty little toys that you hold on a string. I refuse to be one of your little puppets that follow you around to show my undying admiration for someone as shitty as you. No wonder he calls you Shittykawa. You truly are a self centered douche.”

Oikawa’s face was burning red with embarrassment as she pushed past him and continued going to her class. He was astonished, shocked beyond any words imaginary as he stood there and tried to process what had just happened. Eventually he was brought back to his senses when Iwaizumi smacked him over the head and told him to stop staring like a dumbass and get to practice. “Iwa, How do you know (L/n)?” He asked suddenly after they walked in silence for several minutes, which was very unlike Oikawa. “I’m in the majority of her classes and she lives a block away from me. Why?”

“She’s weird. I thought she was gonna confess and then she slapped my hand and called me a douche.” Oikawa said, his tone was completely flat for once and Iwaizumi raised an eyebrow at his friend. “Yeah, well what do you expect? She has better things to do than fawn over you, Shittykawa.”

*Insert offended Oikawa noises here*

Needless to say, his first encounter with you was not exactly what he would’ve liked it to be. Slowly though he tried to fish more information out on you, he wanted to understand why you weren’t like the other girls who practically fell in love with him at first sight and why you were the way that you were in general. That meant that any time Iwaizumi would meet up with you at a park to study together or whenever you guys would spend any type of time together that Tooru would tag along. Teachers thought that you were having a blooming friendship with him though and much to your dismay you ended up getting partnered with him on a school project. You felt sick to the pit of your stomach because you truly didn’t want him to come to your home, but he kept insisting and you knew that there would be no point in trying to convince him otherwise so you gave in to his stubbornness.

You felt ashamed the moment he stepped through the front door, your parents were never home and you had to take care of your younger twin siblings. The house was a mess, and that was when he understood why you had such a cold persona around others. You wanted to distance yourself from people and push them away as much as possible in order for you to not have to go through the embarrassment of looking like a train wreck to everyone else in the circumstances that you were in as opposed to your usual well put together attitude. To your surprise though, he was patient. He jumped in on helping you clean, he even helped the twins with any homework questions they had in between working on your project together and showed no judgement. In fact, he gave you a look of understanding.

After that, you were able to tolerate him more and you allowed him to visit the twins more often while even bringing along his nephew for all of them to play together. He taught them how to play volleyball while also helping you in the kitchen when you needed it. He didn’t want to admit it, but he honestly fell in love with you because of how genuine you were. You guys flirted, but it was suffocating to him like all the other girls who flirted with him on a daily basis. He only had interest in you, and you bet your ass Iwa teased the shit out of him for it. Your project got an incredible score of 100% and the two of you celebrated together by playing some volleyball even though you were complete shit at it. He didn’t care though and had fun. You found yourselves hanging a lot more often, being around each other almost 24/7 and you even met his family at some point. They absolutely loved you, and so did he.

He tried to figure out how he’d confess to you, he wanted it to be special. He wanted it to be a moment the both of you would remember because he quite honestly couldn’t see him spending any of his time with any other girl apart from you. Of course he was extremely nervous and skeptical on how to approach it, it was a 50/50 chance of you liking him back. The thoughts left his mind when he heard your voice outside a local supermarket, asking someone to leave you alone and that immediately flipped a switch in his brain. He quickly tried to look for you and found you trying to tell some tipsy guy that you didn’t want anything to do with him to which he immediately went over with his hands tucked in his pocket.

“Hey (Y/n), everything okay?” he asked as he coldly stared at the man that had been harassing you. A quiet “Oh thank god” was whispered underneath your breath as you managed to force your way closer to Tooru. He immediately wrapped one arm around your waist and kept his eyes locked on the other older gentleman that had been bothering you. The guy smirked, “Oh nothing man, I was trying to have a chat with her and she got all bitchy. That’s all.” (Y/n) could feel his body language immediately became a lot more tense, but you quickly pulled at him and tried to evade the situation. “It’s not worth it, Tooru. Let’s just go, okay? We can get some milk bread and watch movies or something.”

“I don’t appreciate the way you talk about my (Y/n)-chan. In fact, I’d advise you to leave her alone before I make you regret even breathing the same air as her. Got that?” He spoke calmly as he gently nudged you out of the alleyway next to the store. “Hey, who the hell do you think you are? Huh? Can’t just take my woman like that, dude.” This is when you truly saw how angry Oikawa could get as all he did was throw a punch and the guy was down. You could only stare in shock at what had just unfolded in front of you. “If you ever talk about her like that again I swear I’ll make you regret you ever existed.” At that he tugged you along and when the two of you were a few blocks away you grabbed hold of his hand and inspected it. “You seriously didn’t have to go that far. I don’t care what a low life has to say about me, at least I don’t live in the streets and I’ve got a roof over my head.” He remained silent for a moment before latching his hand onto your wrist and pulling you into his chest. “I’d never let anyone do or say anything to hurt you. Remember that. I’m just sorry you had to witness me get like that. I’ll make it up to you though.”

“Oh? I think a date would be a pretty nice way to make it up to me since you insisted on calling me your (Y/n)-chan” you said, giving him a cheeky smile to which he could only reply with a teasing smirk. “Hm, seems only fair after I saved you as heroically as I did.”

“Whatever you say, douche”

*insert baffled Oikawa noises here*

[septicbro1005]

Paint Me How You See Me

A/N: Okay, you have no idea how excited I was to see that I had permission to write this. I literally am so happy I could scream. Will I? Not out loud. This actually made me so excited that I got up and started walking around my room and smiling holy shit. Alright. Enough of that. I was inspired to write this story by a comic made by the fantastic @venadorosas​ and I just am so damn excited to write this! I am not an art student myself, but I will do my best to replicate it with what I know. I hope I do the comic justice! Just a few more things before this thing starts: I'm gonna do myself and make this a Quirkless AU as well as make Yuuei a university instead of a high school. This is unedited, so if there are sentences or misspellings, that is why, and I apologize. Anyway, let's get rolling!

Kirishima's POV

One stroke after the other.

Small, swift.

One stroke makes a world of a difference.

So don't… mess… up.

I only have one canvas left after this one, but I'm saving it for something important. Something special. Just need to figure out what.

I mean, yeah, I have others on back order, and Mr. Miyoshi is usually pretty cool with giving me some, but I still need to think about what to do with the 106 cm by 106 cm canvas.

A canvas that big needs something worth being put on there.

"Psst, Kiri--" "Shhhhhhhhhhhhhut," I hissed out through clenched teeth.

"You nee--" "I said shut,"

"B--" "No. Shut. Lemme finish,"

The person who proceeded to pester me, even after I told him to be quiet, was none other than Hanta Sero.

He was an art student, along with myself and several others I know by name.

One of which was Katsuki Bakugou.

And damn, was he confusing.

He was this aloof dude who talked to maybe two people by his own volition.

Some random girl who I see him talk to ever now and again. I think we've spoken twice? All I remember is she told me to call her Tsu.

And then me.

Sure, he'd talk to the professors and people like that, but if he didn't have to speak, he wouldn't.

Yet, he spoke to me.

Not only did he barely talk to people, but he also is probably one of the best looking people on campus.

I kid you not, the first time I saw this dude, I was totally sure I'd met Adonis in human form.

His ash blond hair was styled into a fluffy undercut that I would pay money for to be able to run my hands through, even once. His gauges and helix piercings gave him a bit of an edge, but that's what made him more alluring. He came into class one day, wearing a wife beater, which put a tattoo on full display, resting on his right shoulder.

It isn't just his looks that are attractive either. The way he holds himself, presents himself, just his whole aura is indescribable, to keep it brief.

And he was the person I was painting this for.

This wasn't his first commission. Not by a long shot. And this one was fairly simple as well. Still, I poured my heart and soul into it, just like every piece.

But with his commissions, I feel the need to work that much harder. To push myself that much farther. To make it perfect, in a word.

Now, I know that perfection is impossible, but I still want to achieve it.

I mean, if Bakugou could, I could too, right?

"Kirishima, I've been talking to you for the past couple of seconds and you haven't shushed me. Don't zone out on me right now, man,"

Sero's voice managed to pull me out of this trance, but only a bit.

The ash blond with the scarlet glare was still in the back of my mind.

"What?"

"You need lunch, man," Sero said, putting a hand on my shoulder.

"Listen, I thank you for your concern, but I had a protein shake maybe six hours ago. I'm dandy," I mumbled, doing a few more soft strokes before standing up. "Plus, I'm not even hungry," 

"Dunno what kind of protein shake you're drinking, but you still need sustenance. C'mon," Sero attempted to persuade me as I walked to the sink to clean the small brush.

"I'm cool, dude. I have a granola bar or two in my bag. I'll eat when I'm hungry," I chuckled lightly, turning on the water and cleaning the brush.

Sero sighed in defeat, as this marked the second week in a row where I substituted breakfast with a protein drink and lunch with a granola bar.

"Alright, fine. Make sure you eat dinner tonight, or Mr. Miyoshi is gonna kick you out again," Sero said, beginning to walk to the door.

"I know, I know,"

"I'll be off, then,"

"Peace out, dude,"

I heard the door to the studio shut, and it was just me in here.

Just me and the paint.

"Hey, Siri,"

My phone lit up, hearing its name.

"Play Rex Orange County on Spotify,"

As I began to finish up some touches on the snow covered forests surrounding a bright red cardinal, the song Uno filled my ears.

The song had no real relevance, but I love that song so much. I dunno if its just because it sounds so simple and sweet, but I just think the song's pretty great.

I'd say after maybe forty-five minutes of doing seemingly pointless touch-ups, I stood back, admiring my work.

Not much needed to be done, but I needed this to be phenomenal.

"I'll just use a simple varnish once everything is dry, then I can move it into the back," I muttered to myself, as if someone was there and I had to be quiet. "Can I finish it today? I could tell him where it is, and wait for the money to come in, I guess,"

A few seconds pause later, and I continued.

"Wow, great job, Eijirou. You sound like a dickwad who just wants money,"

A short sigh, a granola bar and maybe a half an hour or so later, everything seemed dry.

"Let's varnish this motherfucker, and I'll text him when that's done," I mumbled, going into the cabinets, looking for the varnish.

No other assignments at the moment… okay! Cool! I can probably head back to my dorm, chill there, and text Bakugou when it's done!

When I finally found it, I got to work on the varnish.

***

"And sent," I whispered as I approached the dormitories.

I just sent Bakugou a short text, telling him where to find it, how to send me the money (although he probably knows the process by heart at this point) and all that jazz.

My dorm building was in sight when my phone buzzed once.

It was a different buzzing pattern than all the others.

"Oh, Bakugou responded this quickly?" I thought aloud.

Opening my phone, I checked the message.

Sent the ¥321.7K 

My eyes widened at the number.

"I sure as hell didn't tell him to send me that much, what the hell?"

                                                   What!? The commission was only ¥48.2K?!

His response was immediate.

Left a tip.

Get yourself something nice.

"Whoa," I murmured.

Now, I knew Bakugou was on the higher end of the economic spectrum, but hot damn! 

He did usually give me more money than I told him to, but that fact that he gave me that much more this time just seemed to solidify the thought of him being rich.

So manly.

Heading into my dorm building, I looked to the elevators, only to see an out of order sign on them both.

"Are you kidding me?" I whispered. "Fine, guess I'm just gonna take the damn stairs,"

I got a notification, seeing the ¥321.7K was successfully put into my account, and I knew this commission was over.

But at this point, I knew what to expect from Bakugou. Next time I see him, he's gonna ask me about another one.

Not that I mind, not one damn bit. I'm cool with any excuse to talk to him, and I'm happy to please him with my art.

I just gotta brace myself for the next time I see him.

Trudging up the stairs, I began pondering what he would want next.

He seems to really like requesting animals, mainly birds such as crows and cardinals, but will he do something different? Ooh, maybe a peacock! Or maybe he'd want some other winged creature… like maybe an insect? Or possibly he'll switch it up on me.

As I ended up on the next staircase, I heard someone else's footsteps approaching.

Looking up, my eyes were met with a familiar scarlet pair of eyes.

"Oh, hey, Bakugou!" I said with a wave.

"Hey," he replied with a simple nod.

Fuck, he was just as gorgeous as always.

A grey turtleneck hugged his torso, with a black and white pinstripe button up on over it. The shirt was tucked into a pair of black jeans, a wallet chain dangling on his right side. A pair of black converse and a dog tag finished his look, alongside my composure.

"Thanks again for the great work," he said, his husky voice hypnotizing me further.

"You haven't already picked it up, have you?" I asked, cocking my head to the side. "I don't think I saw you walk past me to get to the parking lot,"

"Nah, but I know it's gonna look good," his compliment was accompanied by a smirk.

Short-lived, yes. But a smirk nonetheless.

"Aw, thanks dude! Always happy to make something for my best customer!" I felt myself beam at him. 

"See you around, Red," he said, continuing down the stairs.

"Bye," I waved with a small smile on my face as he disappeared down the stairs.

I quickly hauled ass up to my floor, speed walked to my door and slammed the keys in.

Gay panic in private, dude.

Opening the door, I pulled my key out and shut the door.

"I'm back, Omi!" I shouted into the apartment to see if my roommate was here.

"Hey," my roommate responded from his bed.

"Is it cool if I hop in the shower real quick?" I asked, jerking a thumb toward the bathroom.

"Sure thing. Keep it brief," Omi said, making me roll my eyes.

"Okay, dad," I sighed, but I gave a smile to show it was all in jest.

After locking myself in the bathroom and stripping myself down to absolutely nothing, I got in the shower and had a gay crisis.

Because that's the only place you can have those, y'know?

But a good ol' Panic! In The Shower was enough to calm my nerves.

As I stepped out of the bathroom to grab clothing, I heard Omi laughing.

"What?"

"That Bakugou guy really messes you up, huh?" his laughter was thrown in between words, but I knew exactly what he was referencing.

"If I'm being too loud, just knock on the door, dude! Tell me to shut it, I don't care," I flushed, looking at the ground, my hand tightening around the towel that hung on my waist.

Omi just kept laughing at me as I grabbed my clothes; a simple crimson riot shirt, boxers, black shorts and my wave socks.

It isn't like I'm going anywhere tonight, right?

…

Is what I originally thought until I was dressed and realized I left my motherfucking cardigan at the studio.

"Ugh, fuck," I groaned, rubbing a towel on my head.

"Left your cardigan again?"

"Perhaps," 

"You might as well just wrap it around your waist," Omi suggested.

"And risk getting paint on it?" I looked at Omi like he was a motherfucking psychopath. "Hell no. The cardigan was my grandmother's, so I ain't doing shit to it,"

"Clearly, if you're leaving it in the studio again," Omi mumbled.

"Shush!" I whined, grabbing my keys and slipping on my red sneakers. "I'll be back,"

"Okay,"

Leaving my dorm, I began going down the stairs when I ran into someone.

It was Bakugou, again.

And just when I thought my gay panic was over for the day.

"Oh, hey," I said as casually as possible.

Which probably sounded forces as fuck, because it felt like my heart was just about ready to implode.

"Red," Bakugou was looking me up and down.

I don't think I've ever felt more self-conscious about my appearance in my life.

"I've got another request, if it isn't too much,"

"O-oh, okay!" 

Why did I stutter?! That was so unmanly!

"So, what is it?"

I looked into his gorgeous eyes, trying to see further into him, but I was only met with his right hand slamming into the wall next to my head.

Oh shit, oh fuck. I'm gonna die. I'm gonna collapse, right here. Right now. I can't handle this.

"Uh, dude? You--" "Paint me how you see me, Kirishima,"

Uh, what?

I was stuck between saying "Got it," and "What?" so my dumbass just responded with this:

"Gweh?"

We sat there, in silence, staring at each other.

My face was flushing bright red, and I wanted to look away, but I didn't. I couldn't. His eyes just drew me in.

He moved his arm to his side, and began to head up the stairs.

Quick, say something coherent!

"O-on it!"

I swear, I saw him smile a bit before he was completely gone.

What was I doing again?

***

It's been around three weeks.

It's been three weeks of planning, sketching, and small, swift strokes.

And plenty of panic, but that's irrelevant. There was a bit of disco, so it balances out anyway.

Mr. Miyoshi did end up setting a curfew on me, to make sure I didn't pass out at the studio, but it wasn't set until it had already happened.

But, since I wanted to work on it after the curfew, I brought it to the dorm, keeping it on newspaper and buying the paint I needed.

I had the picture in my mind, which I did my best to replicate without him genuinely modelling for me.

It was a ¾ shot of his shirtless back, with him looking over his right shoulder, giving a perfect view of his side profile. I also made sure I replicated his tattoo to the best of my abilities, and I think it came out okay.

But that isn't all!

Monarch butterflies lined his back, as a fiery looking echo was placed slightly to the left. 

Those warm colors contrasted like hell, compared to the blues and navy of the background.

Just to fuck around with more color, flecks of brighter colors adorned the background, giving it sort of galaxy look.

I thought it looked gorgeous.

And not just because it's Bakugou.

You know how when you make something, and you worked so damn hard on it, and when it's done, you're just filled with pride?

This is one of those works for me.

"Omi!" I yelled about before cringing.

It's 01:35.

"Yeah?" 

Why the fuck does he sound like he's been awake?

"First of all, have you been awake this whole time? Second of all, could you grab me my phone?" I said a little quieter.

"It's done?" Omi asked, coming over with my phone.

"I'm happy with it," I said with a huge grin.

"Looks fantastic," Omi pat my shoulder before walking off.

Using my nose, I unlocked my phone and took a picture before putting my phone down.

I just looked at the painting, with Bakugou's slight pout catching my eyes.

I have absolutely zero clue what came over me, but I lifted my forefinger to my mouth, and pressed a small peck to it.

My forefinger rested against the painting's lips, and I just felt warm.

And that was probably the best feeling ever.

I gotta give this to him in person. It's about time I told him.

***

What floor are you on again?

                                                                                    Number two. Room 204.

Okay, I'm coming over.

I let out a shuddery breath, looking at the canvas, which I covered with a blanket.

I need to tell him.

It's time.

I kept opening my phone, making sure I had the song ready to play at the click of a button.

He needs to know.

A loud knock landed on my door, and I jumped.

I walked over to the door, playing the song as I opened it.

"Hey, Bakugou! Come in!"

The ash blond entered, wearing a button up and jeans again, just no turtleneck this time.

"So, I wanted to give this one to you in person… because I…" I was stumbling over my words.

Calm down, Eijirou. You got this.

"Because this could very well be the last commission you want from me,"

This made Bakugou's usual deadpan change ever so slightly. His left brow rose up as his head tilted to the side.

"And why might that be?"

"I…"

Fucking say it.

Spit it out.

"I like you," I barely got out before throwing my gaze at the ground. "I like you a lot. You're just so cool and collected, and from what I know about you, I like it. And I want to know more. I'm sorry if this makes you uncomfortable, but I just had to get that out," 

Before I even looked at him, I walked over to the painting, still looking at the ground, and pulled the blanket off.

Everything was silent, except for the music in the background. But even the song was at a quieter part than the rest of it.

I felt Bakugou's eyes on me and not the painting, which terrified me to no end.

Should I have even said anything?

"You don't have to pay if you don't want to or if you don't like it. And…" I took in a shaky breath, looking at the ground, lazily gesturing to the painting and then myself. "If you don't want to be friends anymore, if you even thought of us as friends, then you can ignore me,"

His footsteps were soft, but I knew they were coming. So when his black converse appeared in my vision, I looked off to the side as my vision blurred with tears that threatened to spill. 

A finger went under my chin, turning my face to him.

His eyes met mine, and he was smiling.

"You really are oblivious, huh?"

"Gweh?"

Fucking, again?

Bakugou laughed before leaning in a bit, his head turning to the left.

"Can I kiss you as a tip?"

My whole brain has short-circuited, but I turned my head to the right and leaned in closer.

My eyes slowly closed, and when his lips met mine, I was immediately thrown into a state of euphoria.

Holy shit, this is happening.

This is actually happening!

I couldn't help the smile that bloomed on my face as I draped my arms over his shoulders, and I couldn't stop laughing either.

It was so fucking amazing.

Small blazes of tears made tracks down my cheeks, but I didn't care. Unless my nose starts running, I'm not gonna let some tears mess up this kiss.

But, all good things must come to an end, as Bakugou pulled back.

His eyes were on mine, and for once, they were soft. A small grin was pasted on his features, his hands on my face.

"Why are you crying?" he asked as his thumb rubbed at my dampened cheek.

I just felt myself giggle in response. 

"Well, I was originally gonna cry because I thought you wouldn't be cool with my confession, but these tears quickly turned sweet," I just couldn't stop laughing. "Shit, I'm so happy,"

We just stood there for a few moments of content silence before Bakugou spoke up.

"So, how the hell am I supposed to bring this painting to my dorm?" 

"I can help you bring it up there!" I offered.

"I get to bring two masterpieces to my dorm? Great!" Bakugou oozed confidence as he said that.

"Dear christ," I began giggling again, since that was unexpected.

We grabbed the painting, and I made sure Bakugou was careful with it, but was also holding it properly.

"Hey, Omi! Could you get the door?"

"Sure,"

"Your roommate was here?" Bakugou asked.

"Well, it's his dorm too." I pointed out as Omi got the door for me. "Plus, it isn't like I wasn't so obviously crushing on you,"

"It really wasn't," Omi said, patting my back carefully. "But congratulations to the both of you,"

"Thanks, Omi,"

Bakugou just gave a small murmur to thank Omi.

"Alright, Bakugou, you go through the door first, then we can keep walking," I said, turning us so Bakugou could walk out the door properly.

"Okay,"

After a quick minute of maneuvering, we managed to get the painting up the stairs without damaging it.

"So you're which dorm?"

"302," Bakugou said as we got to his door.

"Coolio!" I grinned.

"Dork," Bakugou snickered at me. "How d'you want this to be put down?"

"We can just rest it against the wall," I said, propping the painting up on the wall.

"Give me a quick sec," Bakugou mumbled, unlocking the door.

He swung the door open and made sure it stayed open. 

"Alright,"

"At this point, I'm gonna follow you. You know where you wanna put this?" I asked him.

"Uhm… I think Misumi wouldn't mind if I placed this on his side of the room until I know exactly where to hang it," Bakugou said as we walked into the room.

***

My paintings were all on the wall. The snow surrounded cardinal, the murder of crows, all of them.

Except one.

The other paintings sort of made a frame, with a 106 cm x 106 cm square in the middle.

"Hey, honey?" I called out.

"What's up, Rourou?" Katsuki asked from the other room.

"Could you grab me the step ladder?"

"Shorty," I heard Katsuki laugh.

"I heard that, Katsu! You aren't as quiet as you think!"

"Says you, of all people!" Katsuki chuckled, coming on with the step ladder.

"Thank you, baby," I said, pecking his cheek.

"Of course. Putting up the last one?" He asked.

"Yep!" I said, grabbing the painting I made all those years back.

The monarch butterflies dotting his spine, his scarlet glare, gorgeous fluffy hair, all of it brought together, and hung up on our wall.

I got off the step ladder, and looked at the paintings. Every single one of them.

A hand snaked around my waist and pulled me in close.

"I love you so much, baby," Katsuki whispered, kissing my forehead.

"I love you too,"

His hand rubbed against my waist, but I could feel one thing that was inconsistent with the feeling of the rest of his hand.

A golden band sat on his left ring finger, practically identical to the one that sat on my left ring finger.

A/N: And that's all! Honestly, I'm very pleased with this, and think this came out well! I hope that those of you who see this like it too! I want to thank @venadorosas for allowing me to write a story based off of their comic and for making such fantastic art. If you like my writing, I'm also on Wattpad, so check me out there, if you're up for it. Same username and profile picture. I do believe that this is it! I apologize for the ending, as it feels a little odd to me, I just don't have any idea how to end it properly. I sincerely hope that I did the comic justice. Love y'all! Stay safe and healthy! - Septic

[thatbeluga]

Wet Sock: Part Five: I have no godamn clue what is happening anymore

Part One / Part Two / Wom’s Chapter / Part Three/ Wom 2 / Part Four

“I’m sorry about my family,” Rad said, bringing Elmo out onto the Quarter Estate’s Designated Romantic Balcony. It had roses, and a few severed fingers with the wedding rings still attached. Fuck thought they would be romantic, and Wom provided the fingers.

“Oh, don’t worry about them,” Elmo said. “They’re all lovely people.”

“Well, not really. Very few of them are actually people,” Rad said, shrugging. 

“But they’re still your family,” Elmo said.

“Well, we’re kind of a family. Also kind of a cult. But like, nicer,” Rad said. “Although then again, it is kind of like a cult, cause it was a god that brought us all together.”

“Oh, that’s cool,” Elmo said. “I meant what I said before. I do think you have a great family. Although I have to say, you’re my favorite.”

“Really? It’s not Beluga? He’s the best. Not cause he actually is, he just says he’s the best and no one stops him,” Rad said.

“No, you’re my favorite. You’re... there’s something... different about you,” Elmo said, tracing Rad’s jaw with her finger. Rad grabbed Elmo’s finger.

“Excuse me, slow burn? Remember?”

“Oh, right.”

“Beluga did say at some point he’d add implied smut just for Kai, but that won’t come up until later.”

“I get it. He’s gotta do fanservice,” Elmo said. “So, as I was saying, there’s something... different about you.”

“I mean yeah, there is something that does make me different from them,” Rad said, taking a deep breath. Most people in the land knew that Rad was the only god that existed, but Elmo didn’t seem to know. It was time she knew, before moving forward in their relationship.

“I’m... a go--

--a god damn great mother!” Wombat said, grapple hooking over the edge of the balcony. Zoe and Misspelled descended from above.

“He’s right!” Zoe said, grabbing Rad’s arm. “She’s a great mom! Which is why she has to go read us our bedtime fanfiction!”

“Yep, we’re in the middle of My Immortal right now,” Misspelled said, grabbing Rad’s other arm. Wombat stepped in front, putting an arm or paw or whatever around Elmo’s shoulder, if Elmo had one, the anatomy is unclear.

“I’ll walk her out,” Wom said.

“But--

“Don’t worry Mom!” Wom said, leading Elmo out of the estate. 

“Meet next week? Your place!?” Rad shouted as her kids dragged her away.

“Sure!” Elmo shouted, as Wom pulled her away. He walked her to the gates, and let her out.

“Thank you, um, for bringing me into your family,” Elmo said. Wom looked back at the castle. Rad would be reading My Immortal to the kids, and even if Beluga and Fuck were listening instead of bringing back dead parrots, they’d forget soon enough, cause of drugs, probably.

“Yeah, about that,” Wom said. “You can’t come back here.”

“What?” Elmo asked. 

“You have to break things off with my mother right now, and never see her again,” Wom ordered. Elmo crossed her arms.

“Look, I know it might be scary, me dating your mom--

“It’s more than scary, it’s life threatening. There are things you don’t know about her, and you can’t find out,” Wom said. “Listen. I care about my family. I need them to be safe. And they can’t be safe if you date Rad.”

Elmo’s eyes went wide, the seriousness of Wom’s words cutting her deep.

“Got it?”

“Got it,” Elmo said.

“Alright! Gonna go track down some loose elephants!” Wom crooned, running back to the estate.

TO BE CONTINUED

[xmxisxforxmaybe]

Elliot x reader where the reader and Elliot work together and at one point are kinda forced to make small talk and at first it's really awkward and embarrassing and just ANXIETY but as they kinda keep the conversation going forcefully they sorta relate to each other (ok thanks I love your writing happy late St Patrick's day 💚☘️)

I LOVE THIS REQUEST. And I LOVE YOU, Anon 💚

“Alderson. Y/L/N. I want you to run penetration tests on Friday’s network patches. Shouldn’t take you more than a day or two, depending on what you find.”

The sterile-white meeting room suddenly felt about 10 degrees hotter than it had a moment ago, and when you moved your hands from the table to your lap, you noticed the remnants of a foggy imprint left behind on the cool surface. You swiped at it, hoping no one noticed, least of all your new partner.

No one wanted to get paired up or put on a team with Elliot Alderson.

He was quiet, sometimes twitchy, always unapproachable, and went out of his way to take up an indiscriminate amount of space in the office. Granted, you weren’t a social butterfly, but you did say your required good-mornings and good-nights, understanding that this was a social expectation and if you adhered to it, people accepted you. Acceptance was nice. It was normal.

So, you played the game, but only when you left the office behind did you really breathe. You knew that it generally took about 30 minutes, door to door, before you were home in your quiet, cozy apartment, wrapped up in what you called your “introvert’s paradise.”

You often wondered if Elliot was the same. Well, you knew he definitely was not the same considering the great lengths he went to avoid human interaction, which led you to believe there was a lot more going on behind those grey eyes than he’d care to let anyone know.

Ah! And there was the rub.

Elliot Alderson may have been strange, but he was attractive.

During these meetings, you always found yourself wishing for something that later made you feel guilty—you wanted him to talk. It was obvious he hated to speak in front of any gathering larger than, well, 0, but you couldn’t help yourself. You hoped your boss would need his input, which he often did. Another thing everyone knew was that Elliot Alderson was the smartest person in the room.

Yet another reason why your palms were now sweaty as you gathered up your laptop, notebook, and pen and chased after Elliot.

He was always the first one to leave a meeting.

By the time you crossed the office, Elliot was already settled at his computer, his fingers working to push in his earbuds. Before he could get the left-side in, you appeared in his line of vision.  

He stared at you, his lips parted, and had you known better, you would have thought he was a statue, perhaps a modern art piece, titled: “Startling Your Co-Worker in the Age of Digital Communication.”

You weren’t expecting him to be completely unaccepting of your presence, but maybe he wasn’t even listening during the meeting.

“Hi, Elliot.”

After several heartbeats passed and you were bordering into the territory of awkward, he lowered his left earbud and said, “Hi.”

Nothing. He wasn’t going to say anything else.

Alright, the conversation would have to be carried entirely by you.

“Uh, so … the penetration tests?”

Elliot looked at you like he had never seen you before—and maybe he hadn’t. Maybe he didn’t even know your name. You had never worked on a project together before, but you had talked during meetings. You passed each other in the elevator, around the office—an office of only about 25 people.

Again, nothing.

“Listen—do you, like, even know who I am?”

Elliot blinked, his large grey eyes disappearing for a moment, and in that moment, you felt a sense of relief. Making eye contact with Elliot was like being scanned by the TSA.

“Y/N,” Elliot answered, his voice low and flat. “You—”

And then he cut himself off, his mouth snapping shut as his eyes scanned your face before settling on the edge of his desk.

“Okaaay,” you said slowly. “First name basis, established. Were you paying attention during the meeting? I mean, I zone out sometimes, too, because Gary’s an asshole, but he assigned us to—”

“Run penetration tests on Friday’s patches,” Elliot said in a mumbled rush.

“Right. Yes. So, I guess you’re the master of penetration—oh my god,” you said as a blush of mortification crept up your neck.

As soon as the words, “master of penetration,” left your mouth, Elliot looked up and his eyes had doubled in size while his lips once again parted. He pulled his lower lip in, biting at it before he swallowed, watching you with what you could have sworn was amusement.

Amusement … or pity.

“I meant that everyone knows you are the best white hat here,” you said slowly so as not to put your gigantic foot back in your idiotic mouth. “It would be foolish for me to look for the vulnerabilities when you are the better hacker.”

“Okay,” came Elliot’s monotone answer.

Okay?!? your mind was screaming. Not a giggle, not a ha-ha-ha, Y/N, I understood what you meant, no big, break the ice, let’s be friends.

Nope.

Just … Okay.

It was clear that Elliot was going to do absolutely nothing to quell your anxiety, so fuck the attempts at small-talk.

With a determined raise of your chin, you sat down next to Elliot and opened your laptop. You could feel him shift a little away from you, and you tried not to take offense. There was already enough space to fit two people between you, but if he wanted more, okie-fucking-dokie.

“Go ahead and remotely access my laptop, I’ll split screen so I can watch you code while I document the data. Just tell me when you find a flaw so I’m sure not to miss anything.”

Before you had even finished speaking, your screen was mirroring Elliot’s. You quickly split the screen and got a doc ready to record the data.

You looked over at Elliot who had his fingers poised over the keyboard; he was peripherally watching you, so as soon as he saw you glance at him, he started working.

Time passed slowly, awkwardly as you sat side-by-side without saying a word. At first, there really was no need to talk, you figured, but normally, most people needed a break from their screen to at least stretch and blink.

Apparently, Elliot was more robot than man.

“Hey!” you said, making Elliot jump, his keystrokes faltering.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you,” you said, embarrassed again.

Elliot shrugged his shoulders and went back to typing, but you weren’t done.

“Well, wait a minute,” you said, his keystrokes faltering again.

“You found and fixed a flaw without telling me—that was the first one, wasn’t it?”

“Yes.”

“Well, the point of me documenting is that we, ya know, talk about it.”

“Why?”

You turned your body toward him and blinked a few times.

“Because … we have to put this in layman’s terms for the analyst? Didn’t you ever wonder what the next step was after the penetration and documentation?”

“No,” Elliot said, finally turning a quick glance in your direction.

“Give me a second,” you said, quickly typing in your document.

Elliot stayed perfectly still, his fingers hovering over his keyboard.

“Alright—read over this and make sure it’s correct.”

Elliot glanced at you again before scooting in his chair about an inch closer in your direction. You suppressed a laugh and turned your laptop toward him so he could more easily see.

Then, Elliot chuckled. The most ridiculous excuse for a laugh huffing out of his mouth for a nanosecond before he snapped it shut again.

“What?”

“You misspelled ‘penetration.’”

You furrowed your brows and slid your laptop closer and a small laugh bubbled up from your throat.

“Good god,” you said through your giggle. “I blame you for that.”

Elliot shrugged his shoulders, but you caught the faintest hint of an upturn of his lips. It couldn’t be called a smile, much like his laugh couldn’t be called a laugh, but it was something human.

You resumed your work, but this time Elliot did pause when he found a flaw. Communication became easier and you found that the workday was starting to fly by.

“Hey! Did you see that?” you interrupted, but this time you didn’t startle him.

“See what?”

You reversed the direction of the code and watched as the screen recreated the last few lines Elliot had run.

“There!”

“Shit … I mean. Shoot,” Elliot said, flustered. “I missed it.”

You chuckled, “See? I’m not as dumb as you think I am.”

Elliot stopped and turned his chair toward you, his intense gaze locking your eyes onto his.

“I don’t think you’re dumb.”

You rolled your eyes and said through a shy smile, “Of course you do. You’re Elliot Alderson. God of hacking.”

Elliot tilted his head, almost like a dog when it was listening to its owner.

“God of hacking?”

You turned your chair to face him, your expression serious.

“You’re the most intimidating person in this office, Elliot.”

“That’s a nice way to say people don’t like me.”

“People just don’t know you. You’re . . . ” you trailed off, unsure if this was a conversation Elliot wanted to have, but he was still looking at you, eyes focused and head slightly tilted.

“You don’t say good-morning … or good-night. You don’t speak unless spoken to. It’s like,” you paused for a moment to think, “it’s like you run a different daily program than everyone else.”

“Oh,” he said, his eyes falling and his hands smoothing over his thighs, rubbing back and forth in a repetitive, nervous motion.

You reached out to comfort him and just with the tip of your finger on the top of his hand, you pressed for no longer than a second.

Elliot looked up at you.

“Try it sometime. Say good-morning. I’ll even let you practice on me,” you said with a sweet smile.

And, to this day, you’ll never forget that Elliot smiled back. And when he smiled, you felt your heart flutter. He wasn’t just a good-looking guy—he was beautiful.

“Ready to run some more tests?” you asked, feeling shy all over again but for an entirely different reason.

“I am the god of penetration,” Elliot deadpanned, his lips quirking into a grin as you groaned, but suddenly turning to correct him.

“I said master of penetration.”

“I know,” said Elliot, his voice containing the smallest hint of coquettish laughter.

Your mouth popped open in surprise before you shut it, shaking your head and grinning to yourself.  

[enchanted-prose]

#8 Just a Day in the Life

100th post = returning from teeny tiny hiatus! Special thank you to my darling editor, and @ piratekingimogen for screaming about the lack of Jarogen fluff in the fandom with me!

Word count: 5,295 

Characters: Jaron, Princess Amarinda, Feall (Original Character), King Oberson (Original Character), Harlowe, Imogen

Notes: Expect a few fluffy fics hurtling towards you, please consult your dentist if you develop cavities bc it’s too sweet and it happened to me. Edited

Enjoy!

Jaron drummed his fingers against his right leg.

The leg he'd broken.

Sometimes he touched it to make sure that it was still healed. Even though it had been years since he'd gotten the injury, he still had trouble realizing that he was alright.

He wasn't broken.

Lord Feall and King Oberson were seated in front of him, separated by Jaron's large desk. Both men were silent. Both were unable to look at Jaron for very long.

In a way, Jaron enjoyed watching them squirm, they'd crossed a line by not telling him about Queen Danika's missing investigators sooner.

Was this how Mott felt each time Jaron did something he wasn't supposed to and got himself caught?

"Your Majesty, we-," Oberson began, but he shook his head. "I'm sorry."

"We'll discuss the situation when the ambassador arrives," said Jaron.

However, Feall didn't agree with Jaron's declaration, it seemed. "If I must be honest, we don't even know the situation anymore."

"Lady Amarinda does, and we'll wait for her to come before we make any assumptions, Lord Feall. I'm a little disappointed, I thought we were friendly enough to discuss political matters."

Feall frowned, and didn't respond.

Boredom was turning Jaron's feet to stone. He hated being bored. There was too much to do and too much to see.

And it was raining still.

He promised Fink they'd go out and hunt for frogs to terrorize Roden with.

The door to Jaron's study creaked open, and in walked Amarinda in a wide-necked blue gown. Her hair was strung up in a golden net. There wasn't any sign of a frown on her face. She dipped her head in greeting when Jaron, Feall, and Oberson stood up.

"My lords," she smiled. "I've brought several papers with me if you'd much rather read my words rather than listen to what I have to say."

"Please, start from the beginning. Reading wastes time," Jaron waved his hand in a dismissing motion. He was joking, of course.

Oberson shrunk in his seat with his head in his hands, but aside from his posture, didn't voice any complaint about listening to Amarinda's debrief.

There were some people who could dominate their foes on the battlefield. Others could crush their enemies without shedding a drop of blood. They could outwit their opponents with words.

Amarinda was a battle master when it came to using words for weapons. She never degraded her opponents with crude words. Never compared people to dehumanizing objects. She recognized that while people didn't agree with her, they were still human beings.

This was how she guided her foes into a corner, their only option being to take her hand and join her cause.

Her goal was not to destroy. Her goal was to create, that's what Tobias claimed.

And he was right.

Amarinda created gateways for better ideals.

Jaron caught himself grinning as he prepared for what Amarinda had to say.

She clasped her hands behind her back. "Gentlemen, we share a home country. One we take pride in. We've given many privileges to those who prove themselves to be just servants of society, but unfortunately, there was an abuse of power several years ago. I know you are aware of what happened on Idunn Craich to Noble House Thay. Rumors were sparked and an entire family was executed without a proper trial.

"Though Their Majesties Queen Danika and King Norman don't condone chasing every rumor they hear, they've made an exception. They were informed that Mireldis Thay, who would've been a child during her house's execution, managed to escape into Carthya. Many of the most skilled researchers and investigators were sent to Carthya to confirm these rumors. Their goal was to find evidence supporting Thay's innocence, and bring her home.They were stopped on their way here for several days, and during that time, I was informed that you King Oberson, went out of your way to visit them without informing the Carthyan Crown that they'd arrived," Amarinda held her head high, almost challenging Oberson to deny her claims.

He didn't, not couldn't he.

Many people had seen him ride out to meet with Danika's representatives.

A heavy pause hung over the air. Both Jaron and Amarinda were waiting for either men to try to deny her claims.

When they didn't speak, Jaron nodded. It was his turn to continue the conversation.

"Lord Feall, I was told by my captain of the guard that the investigators who were sent here were, in actuality, trying to find evidence against Thay, and that you were promoting the search in defiance of Queen Danika's orders, is this true?" Jaron kept his gaze steady, looking for any flaws in Feall's face that would betray him.

Another heavy pause.

Feall didn't squirm, and he looked at Jaron with a fierce, burning loyalty in his eyes. "King Jaron, I did request that the investigators search for evidence against Thay as well."

He fell silent.

Probably waiting for Jaron to condemn him.

However, Jaron was intrigued. He appreciated Feall's honesty. It was something that didn't come often within circles of power. Jaron motioned for Feall to continue.

"I felt a duty to ensure justice," Feall remained stoic. "While I do believe that Thay is innocent, I don't agree with only playing one side. Without considering if House Thay was really guilty, it is possible that Queen Danika's quest for reparations will bring disaster upon Bymar. Thay would likely take revenge, and as a servant to my country and to yours, I will not allow that to happen."

Amarinda's face darkened, but only for a moment. If Jaron hadn't known her so well, he would've missed her momentary weakness.

Though he wanted to support his friend, Jaron couldn't deny that Feall had a perfectly good point.

People weren't black and white.

Too much mystery shrouded what happened with House Thay.

"Do you have any reason to believe that Thay would cause harm?" asked Jaron as he tapped his chin.

Perhaps he should grow a small beard. People might take him more seriously if he stroked his beard each time he was about to say something. Many regents tried to do that, usually it was right before they did their best to be an advisor to Jaron.

If you were going to act the part, you needed to look the part.

To Jaron's surprise, it was Oberson who answered the question, and not Feall. The portly king withdrew a letter from within his coat. "The seal belongs to Thay, and you- and you can read what she wrote yourself. It was sent to me, but it- but it is clearly directed at Lord Feall."

Jaron beckoned for the letter.

The words had been written in jet black ink, and the paper was much cleaner than Jaron would've expected. The curling letters obviously belonged to a woman.

Several words had been misspelled:

King Obrson, I understand you've travelled with lord Feall. you know how much he owes me, and I reqest that you give him to me. if you comply, I promise I wont bother you again. please understand my perspective on this, you know me, sir, you know my family

So, Feall did indeed have a good reason to think that Thay was guilty.

"What would you do with Thay if you found her?" Amarinda kept a calm demeanor.

"I would return her to Queen Danika," Feall explained "Unless, however, she attacks me outright. In which case I would have jurisdiction to decide her fate. An eye for an eye."

"Those laws may work in Bymar, but that's not how we do things here."

"Then, by all means, my lady, I would try to go through with Carthya's judicial process."

Unlike other countries, Jaron didn't enjoy upholding the notion that for every crime committed, you could commit the same in return. Instead, he'd tried to emulate Mendenwal's way of enforcing justice: a vote by a body of people. Typically, two options were given, usually suggested by those who'd been the victim of the crime and the other given by the king.

Death penalties for crimes had to be completely unanimous.

"Do you think that Thay is trying to attack you still?" Amarinda asked, her hands clasped behind her back once again.

Both Feall and Oberson nodded.

"Which explains why he's looking for the Faola," nodded Jaron.

"Captain Harlowe informed me that the Faola only began traipsing through Carthya a few days before King Oberson and I arrived."

"This doesn't excuse the fact that you didn't tell us that you lied to me and Lady Amarinda about Queen Danika's representatives."

"And I humbly apologize for that," Feall held his hand over his heart. "If there is a way for me to prove my regret, tell me, and I will do so."

If he and Feall had been better friends, Jaron would've made a joke about the only way to prove his loyalty was by cleaning Jaron's feet, but he doubted the offer would go over well.

Jaron looked to Amarinda, wondering if she had anything in mind.

She only frowned ever so slightly.

There were many ways that Jaron could force Feall to prove his loyalty. Cruel and humiliating ways. Feall had to have known that. He had to have known the depth of his words.

He'd quite literally given Jaron power over him.

But Jaron didn't enjoy watching people endure humiliation of any sorts. He didn't think that proving loyalty should come at the expense of anyone's dignity.

A clever idea crossed Jaron's mind.

"I'd like you to continue helping Captain Harlowe in patrolling the streets of Drylliad," began Jaron, carefully masking his cleverness. "But you must leave capturing the Faola to him, as well as my friend, Mott. You must trust us to take care of the situation, and that's how I'll know that I can continue to trust you."

Feall inhaled deeply, his brows furrowing together. "Sir, I can't, what you-. No, I mean yes. I will do as you ask, your Majesty."

"Take good care to tread lightly, Lord Feall, this test also represents King Oberson."

"What?" King Oberson burst, his chubby cheeks jiggling with his ferocious outcry. "You can't do this! I need Feall to protect me!"

"You have all of Carthya's guards to keep you safe, as well as your own," Amarinda pointed out.

Several more spluttering protests escaped through Oberson's plump mouth, but eventually, he realized that no amount of begging would get Jaron to change his mind.

A victory, in a way.

Jaron was getting another capable military leader to ensure safety in his city, he'd done his best to uphold justice, and he managed to gain a better understanding about the Thay dilemma.

Unfortunately, however, he also recognized that he probably wouldn't ever understand what happened on Idunn Craich.

But perhaps Avenia's king, Kippenger, might know a little bit.

He hadn't been to Avenia in ages, and was overdue for a visit to check in on the reforming nation. Jaron made a mental note to suggest a diplomatic mission to Sparling.

Everybody could use a little change of scenery.

"Is there anything else you'd like me to do, your majesty?" Feall asked, sitting as tall as he could in his chair.

"Yes, I'd quite like it if you gave me your desserts as well. Especially the fancier ones with the tiny decorations." Jaron frowned when Amarinda snorted, as he was being completely serious.

A tiny smile flickered across Feall's face. "If that is what you wish, your Majesty."

"It is what I wish, actually."

"Then I solemnly swear to do all that I can to ensure that your wish is fulfilled. When would you like me to begin patrolling the streets? Would you prefer me to ask Captain Harlowe my questions, or would you like me to ask you?"

Ah, Jaron hadn't thought of any questions that might need answering.

"Go to Captain Harlowe," he said. "And if Captain Harlowe can't answer them, bring your questions to me. Are we clear?”

“Yes sir.”

Several days ago, Imogen’s new lady-in-waiting, Renlyn Karise, pointed out just how bland the great hall was. Of course, Jaron had taken down and sold many decorations on purpose, but Lady Renlyn’s various attempts to sell him exquisite imported decor were slowly growing on him.

No, he needed to use the royal purse to better the lives of his subjects first.

Beautification could come later.

When he settled into his throne and allowed for his first subject to come forward, Jaron fooled himself into thinking that court would be smooth and quick.

However, as he heard his forty-ninth claim about chickens, he realized that court was going to drag on into the next decade.

It was then that Jaron began wondering if he should heed Renlyn’s advice and have her decorate the great hall.

Maybe he’d have something more interesting to look at than whitewashed stone walls.

Jaron tapped his chin as he listened to complaint after complaint after complaint. He did his best to listen. Did his best to be a good king, but his patience was running out.

“We have never had a dispute between property before,” said a man from outside the city walls. He was holding a chicken, and pointing at the other villager beside him ever so often. “Always got along, me an’ him, we never did fight. Respected his property, I did, an’ he respected mine. But one day a chicken wandered through both of our yards-”

The chicken holding villager’s friend cut in. “A chicken wandered through both a’ our yards an’ then laid an egg on the line between our two properties!”

“We didn’t really worry about it because we’ve both got our chickens. It wasn’t really worth our time.”

“And then the egg hatched, it did! An’ now we don’t know what to do wif it! It’s a good layer, we’ve been tradin’ off every couple a days, but that just doesn’t cut it! We need you to decide for us!” Finished the second villager, vehemently pointing at the chicken tucked under the first villager’s arm.

“Well, I suppose that answers an age old question. What came first, the chicken, or the egg?” Jaron mused, buying himself time through a joke.

Both villagers frowned.

By the Saints, he didn’t like explaining jokes, humor always lost when it needed to be explained.

"There's a riddle people tend to ask when they want to annoy somebody," Jaron explained, sitting forwards in his throne. "They ask what came first, the chicken? Or the egg? And in this case, it was the chicken who came first. Actually, I suppose even that chicken came from an egg. What a conundrum."

"But who gets the chicken?" Asked the second villager with a frown.

"Who cares for it more?"

Both men raised their hands, trying to jostle each other out of the way. The second villager raised his hand to smack the first villager across the back of his bald head.

The first villager only tucked the chicken into his chest and ducked.

No blows were given, the second villager wasn't stupid enough to start a fight in the throne room.

"I have a proposition," said Jaron. He knew it didn't really matter, as he was the king, but he tried to involve his subjects in decision making as much as he possibly could.

"We're listening, your Majesty." The second villager bowed until his nose brushed his boots.

On the other hand, the first villager only bowed as far as he could without risking dropping the chicken.

A slight smirk crossed Jaron's face. "How many eggs does the chicken lay each day?"

"One, like the other chickens," the second villager nodded. "I checked every morning while I housed the chicken."

"Actually she lays one egg on the first day of the week, one on the second day, but she lays two on the third day if she is fed scraps from the table instead a grain," the first villager said proudly, holding the fat hen up for everyone to see.

The hen gave a tiny cluck.

"It's worse than I thought," Jaron muttered, wishing he had Mott beside him to joke with.

"You- you haven't decided who gets the chicken?" The first villager stuttered. "But-"

"He's the king, you fool, he can take as much time as he wants."

Jaron tilted his head at the first villager, who was nervously petting the chicken he cradled.

He wanted to smile with somebody. Wanted to smile about the fact that somebody loved their chicken so much that they knew how many eggs she laid every day.

If he were a cruel king, Jaron would've called for the hen to go to the kitchens, only to declare that he wasn't being serious and give the hen back to her rightful owner.

But over time, he'd learned that some tricks and pranks weren't truly funny.

"I know what's best in this situation," Jaron declared, waving the two villagers away and motioning for the next petitioner to come forward. "The man holding the chicken the same way he'd hold his newborn son gets to give her a permanent home."

He ignored the complaints from the second villager as they were escorted out of the great hall.

The next petitioner was a young man, requesting that his father be taken out of debtor's prison. Jaron, who was prepared to fight with nobles over situations with people in debt, agreed on the premise that the young man return to inform them if there was another threat from debt-collectors.

Ah, Jaron did get quite the rise out of showing kindness when the nobles had none.  

Court went much quicker after that. As he thought of the first villager happily carrying his hen home, Jaron grinned.

How somebody could love a chicken so much, he didn't know.

Late into the afternoon, Harlowe made his way into the great hall, much to Jaron's relief.

He stood and clasped Harlowe's weathered hand, unashamed of how big his smile had grown. "I'm hoping you came to relieve me of my duties."

"I have, actually," Harlowe said with a grin. "Today was much busier than anybody expected, and I didn't think it quite fair to keep you cooped up inside."

"On the contrary, I didn't mind being held up here for once. It's raining with enough fury to challenge the Devils."

"Ah, but you won't let that stop you from what you wish to do with your afternoon, I hope," chuckled Harlowe, his blue eyes sparkling with a glimmer of content.

"Absolutely not." Jaron couldn't hide his smile. "My bones are aching from sitting."

"I wish I could tell you that aching goes away, but it only gets worse. No, no, I tease."

Jaron couldn't resist. He threw his arms around Harlowe's neck in a sloppy embrace. "Thank you, thank you for coming to fill in."

Harlowe patted Jaron's shoulder. "As prime regent, it's my obligation to ensure that the king can handle his duties. And as someone who cares about you, it's my obligation to make sure you don't run yourself into the ground."

It was still odd. . .

Having multiple people care about his well being.

"I really appreciate it, Harlowe, and I mean it."

"Then go, my king." That sparkling contentment in Harlowe's eyes rivaled the lazy Roving River. "Your friends await you."

Was it wrong to take pride in what he’d managed to set up?

It had taken almost all afternoon, and required the help from not only Roden and Tobias, but from Jolly, Lady Renlyn, and Mott too.

In the end, it was perfect.

For several weeks, Jaron had been meaning to take Imogen away from the hustle and bustle of castle life. Although they weren’t in a position to leave for more than a day or two, they could manage to spare a night away from their duties.

And he’d finally done it.

“Don’t tell Imogen anything,” Jaron said firmly, trying his best to stare down Lady Renlyn Karise as they stood in one of the castle hallways.

It wasn’t easy.

Lady Renlyn was taller than him by a good inch.

“I promise I won’t tell,” Renlyn crossed her arms. “But be thankful, the queen isn’t always the type to enjoy a surprise.”

“See, people say that, but then get excited when they’re surprised.”

Renlyn only stared in response.

“Mad that I got you cornered?” No, no answer from that either. Jaron waved his hands in defeat. “You’re dismissed, I don’t need you and your disapproval.”

“Disapproval?” Renlyn arched an eyebrow.

“Yes! Disapproval, you’re not exactly subtle about it, Lady Karise.”

“Good, it means I’ve finally got my point across.”

“Aren’t you in a feisty mood today?” Jaron snickered, putting his hands on his hips.

He wasn't sure what kind of reaction he wanted from Renlyn. She was remaining completely placid. “This is how I always behave, my king.”

“Is not, you’re nicer to me.”

“On the contrary, I think I’m being nicer to you now.”

He’d known the Karises before.

From his days when his family was still alive.

Jaron hadn’t been the closest to Renlyn when they were children, it’s true. She’d rather mix various ingredients together to eliminate her least favorite dolls while Jaron would rather track dirt all over the place.

In a way, it also reflected the way they handled situations at court.

Renlyn wasn’t afraid to do what needed to be done. Already the notorious gossipers of court were spreading their opinions on Renlyn’s ambition. She had but one fear: Recognition. Most of her opponents slipped away in the night, never to disturb her again.

Jaron would much rather stay away from gossipers and the like.

Made things less messy.

Unfortunately, Jaron didn’t get his retort spoken in time, as Renlyn walked away, taking the final say with her as she went to Imogen’s study.

Their exchange couldn’t bring Jaron down from the excitement searing through his veins.

Each step he took made him feel light, yet heavy. Time couldn’t pass fast enough. He was beginning to pace. To the wall. Back to where he’d stood. To the wall again. Back to where he stood. The pattern continued for what seemed like ages, but Jaron knew better than that.

The clock stationed by the door, a huge monster of wood and metal, chimed.

It was better that a few minutes passed rather than no minutes at all, Jaron reasoned.

And then Imogen quietly stepped into the room.

Dressed in a pale blue blouse with matching split skirts, Imogen couldn’t hide her smile. For a moment, Jaron suspected that Renlyn spilled the secret surprise waiting just outside the castle walls.

He offered an arm out to Imogen, escorting her through the great hall and out into the courtyard.

“I really hope there’s no crocodiles involved,” Imogen muttered as Jaron helped her into Mystic’s saddle.

Jaron cringed as comically as he could, and then swung into place right behind Imogen. “Well, ah, guess you’re not going to like what I have in store.”

Imogen’s laugh was worth all of the hassle Jaron had put into his special surprise.

The sun was barely dipping down below the horizon, throwing golden rays of light into the crisp air. A slight shimmer appeared on Imogen’s cheeks. Jaron pressed a kiss to her temple, her hair, her chin, anywhere he could reach.

She was giggling when she pushed his face away.

“Let me kiss you, silly girl,” Jaron hummed, only to once again be pushed away.

“Absolutely not, it’s embarrassing!”

“I want the entire kingdom to know how much I love my wife! It’s not embarrassing at all!”

“Yes it is!”

“No it’s not!”

“Get your filthy lips off my hair,” Imogen laughed. “I’m serious, Jaron! You’re going to run us into a-,” suppressed giggles prevented her from finishing her sentence.

“Last one, I promise.” True to his word, Jaron pressed one last kiss to Imogen’s temple, and pulled away.

Imogen leaned back against his chest. “Renlyn and I were discussing what to do with the trio of children Roden brought to us.”

“Please tell me you gave them new names.”

“We suggested it, but they didn’t seem to catch onto the idea.”

“What did you and Lady Renlyn decide? Are you going to ship them off?”

“Quite the contrary, actually,” Imogen was smiling, Jaron could hear it in her voice. “Renlyn took the subject to a business ally she has in court, and the children are to become wards here in court. We’ll be able to keep an eye on them.”

“I do love more company, maybe those three will take the spotlight off of my antics.”

“Very unlikely, but you can always hope that’ll happen.”

“Oh Imogen of such little faith.”

“Oh Jaron of such high energy.”

With a snicker, Jaron buried his face in her hair for a moment. “Copying my words now are you?”

“I suppose I am.”

“Imitation is the highest form of flattery.”

“That’s what I’ve heard,” Imogen countered. “Do you prefer that I copy everything you say? Is that what makes you happy?”

“Is that what makes me happy? No, it doesn’t.”

“Then what does?”

“Being with you.”

A blush spread across Jaron’s face despite the fact that he was the one saying silly flowering comments, not the one they were directed at.

He loved Imogen.

She was safe.

Without the company of guards, it was much easier to have a personal conversation.

Much easier for both Jaron and Imogen to just. . . be together.

“I, ah, I confronted Feall and King Oberson,” Jaron said over the sound of Mystic’s hooves on Drylliad’s cobblestone streets.

Imogen reached back, her hand trailing down the side of his face. “And what happened?”

The simple, shy gesture left warmth careening through his toes. Jaron tightened his arms around her waist. His heart pounded through his ribcage, but not with fear.

His heart pounded with pure, sunshine comfort.

Sunshine comfort that didn’t fade away with each new morning.

“I questioned them both, and made an offer to Feall. He trusts us to take care of the Faola, and I won’t expel him back to Bymar,” said Jaron. “I, ah, I’m playing this game for the long run.”

“As you should,” Imogen gestured to a group of ducklings swimming in the Roving River, then motioned for Jaron to continue.

He shrugged, “I plan on speaking with Kippenger.”

“Regarding House Thay?”

“Yes, but also no. Kippenger is my ally despite the history between us. I want to ensure his, and Avenia’s, success. I want to know if Carthya needs to send aid in any form, and if we need to, I fully intend to send the best.”

Kippenger was a new king.

There was no doubt that there were some Avenians who disagreed on Kippenger’s right to reign.

Revolution had to be brewing on their minds.

Imogen paused, connecting what Jaron said and what he was implying. “You need a backup in case you have to send Roden and military reinforcements to Avenia.”

“I don’t want to put Mott in any more danger than he puts himself in,” Jaron muttered. “Feall’s reputation is spotless. He wouldn’t be there for very long either, maybe a few weeks. And it’s-”

“Jaron, you don’t have to explain your choices. I trust your judgement.” Imogen said, but then she tilted her head, preparing to amend her statement. “I trust your judgement when it comes to people.”

“You have no idea how much that means to me.”

Though she didn’t say anything, Jaron could feel her quiet grin radiating through the air.

They rode in silence through the woods, waving at the few people they passed, and breathing in the sunset air.

And yet, despite the comfort, Jaron couldn’t fight the anxiety gnawing at his insides any longer.

What if Imogen didn’t like what he’d set out for her?

What if-

No.

If Lady Renlyn Karise, notorious stone-faced, heartless, ambitious businesswoman, liked what had been set out, Imogen certainly would.

The road curved left. Imogen only protested slightly when Jaron guided Mystic to continue straight.

“We, ah, I’m going to dismount,” Jaron stuttered. “But you can stay on, I’ll just guide Mystic.”

“I can walk,” Imogen insisted.

“If- ah, if you want to, I won’t stop you.”

He knew she’d enjoy the surprise, and yet, he was afraid.

Afraid that she wouldn’t-

No. Imogen was his wife. There was nothing to be scared of.

Nimbly, Jaron dismounted, and held out a hand for Imogen to do the same. He held Mystic’s reins with one hand, and entwined his fingers with Imogen’s with the other.

“Your palms are sweaty, Jaron. Are you alright?”

“I dipped them in the fountain before we came, they must not have dried.”

“You’re acting a little- oh.” Her face shifted from confusion, and then to shock.

Before them, Jaron had brought a ragged quilt he’d found in Tithio, boasting squares Imogen’s mother had made herself. Large pillows were scattered about in all shapes and sizes, some hidden behind additional blankets.

Plates of food rested on curling iron stands. A bucket of ice housed two large bottles of something sweet, Jaron hadn’t been able to decide what to take, so he relied on his head chef’s opinion. Candles on holders and stands were placed in clusters in strategic positions. Crystals hung from tree branches.

“I thought about bringing music, but I could only think of Jolly, and I didn’t want him eating everything I brought,” Jaron said sheepishly. “This- this,ah, isn’t all. I have-”

“I love it, Jaron, I absolutely love it,” Imogen was quiet, her fingers steepled together and resting against her nose.

“That’s not all, I, ah, there’s more to the surprise.”

Fink’s head poked out from one of the trees, but thankfully disappeared the second Jaron frantically shooed him away.

Imogen was still marvelling at the quilt. “This is perfect.”

Once again, Fink appeared.

Changing his plan, Jaron motioned for Fink to bring the final gift. The transaction happened in the knick of time, Fink was dashing back to the castle before Imogen looked up from the quilt squares.

Jaron held the package behind his back. “I, um, I couldn’t resist. I wanted to spend time with you. Just you, Imogen.”

“I really appreciate it,” her smile was tinged with a bright pink blush. “I don’t-, I don’t really know what to say.”

“This will probably make it worse, then.”

“Jaron? What are you-?”

He held out the package for Imogen to see.

In his hands, rested a cream colored cat with a bright pink bow hanging loosely from its neck. Imogen covered her face with her arm for a moment. When she finally looked at the kitten again, she was beaming.

“You got me a kitten,” she mumbled, covering her bright pink cheeks with her hands. “Is it mine?”

“If you want it, yes. And ‘it’ is a ‘she’, if that influences what her name is going to be,” Jaron said as he sat down beside Imogen, holding the small cat out to her.

“Where did you find her?”

Jaron didn’t mean for an instant scowl to ruin his smile. “Renlyn sold it to me.”

“Ah, I think I know why,” Imogen scratched the cat’s ears. “We were discussing different royal pets. Supposedly, there are specific cats you can train to listen to you.”

“I’m not quite sure how true that is, especially coming from Renlyn.”

“We’ll just have to find out.”

The tiny cat mewed, and tried to climb up Imogen’s blouse sleeve. She untied the ribbon, cradling the cat to herself.

Nothing in the world could’ve made Jaron feel the same way that Imogen’s smile did. 

[aworldoffandoms]

The panic is making people panic-shop and stock up on things — tiolet paper being the main thing people want and need. --- so then you'd have no problem with me pointing out that you misspelled TOILET paper several times in a recent reblog. Use your own grammar and proofreading skills on your own work.

Thanks for bringing this to my attention and I will take this criticism in stride. It was 2:30 in the morning when I wrote that so you’ll have to excuse me there. 

How about we put this all behind us and leave it well enough alone? It’s gone on long enough and this whole thing has been blown way out of proportion.

[javajunkieao3]

Sit In My Corner

A little pre-premiere treat for you all!  This was written for the @bugheadauproject!  

Prompt:  Betty and Jughead fight over the same library table.

Several months into her college career, Betty discovered the perfect spot in the library.  It was a single-person table nestled in the back of the third floor between the political and English theater sections.  It was an area that had very little foot traffic with the added bonus of being a comfortable distance from the restrooms - an incomparable benefit for an avid coffee drinker such as Betty.  It was perfection.

And then he showed up.

Logically, Betty knew that she could not be upset with a stranger for discovering her table.  Just as she had every right to sit there in between classes and on an odd Friday night, so did he.  Yes, logically, Betty knew that she did not have an indignant leg to stand on.  Realistically, though, she didn’t care.  That stranger took her perfect library spot and she was mad as hell.

“Can you believe the nerve?  I mean, everyone knows that’s my table,” Betty huffed after finding the table occupied after her morning British literature class. 

“Actually, no one knows you own it,” Veronica pointed out.  “You just unilaterally announced that five minutes ago.”

“Come on, it’s an unspoken rule.  When someone favors a certain table it is common courtesy to not take that table.  Everyone knows that.  Unless you were raised in a barn, which this guy probably was.”

“I think you’re being too harsh.”

“Oh, I’m not. He knows what he’s doing.  One time we both were heading to the table and he actually made eye contact with me when he sat down.”

Veronica gave her an unimpressed look.

“Eye contact, V!”

“Yes, I heard you the first time and I am still unimpressed.  Just get a new table.  It’s not a big deal.”

Veronica didn’t understand.  The table was so much more than just a table to Betty.  She knew it was silly, but it had come to be representative of her finding her place in this new collegiate world.  She’d been nervous to go so far from home, and in the beginning it hadn’t been easy.  She didn’t make friends quickly and she found herself struggling in class more than she expected.  But things seemed to fall into place when she found that table.  She met Veronica after her roommate, Cheryl Blossom, dragged her to a fraternity party.  She worked out a study schedule that allowed her to both be prepared for her classes and sleep.  While Betty knew it wasn’t actually because of the table, she couldn't help but think that it was her good luck charm.  How would the next three years go if she didn’t have it anymore?

The next day Betty decided that she would confront him.  There was no other way to deal with the situation than head on.  He typically had the table Thursday afternoons, and sure enough, she walked over after her statistics class and he was seated in her spot, typing away on his laptop.  She took a deep breath before walking over and stopping beside him.  She expected him to look up and when he didn’t, she loudly cleared her throat.

Once.  Twice.  

On the third time he looked up and asked, “Do you need a throat drop or something?”

“What?  A throat drop - no.  I’m not - it’s not...” she trailed off, giving up on any semblance of niceties.  After a deep breath she blurted out, “You stole my table!”

“Excuse me?”

“I’ve studied at this table every day for the past semester.  And now suddenly you show up!  This is my table.  I found it first.”

“Are you serious?”

“I am very serious.”

He seemed to consider that for a moment before reaching forward and closing his laptop.  He turned toward her and said, “This table does not belong to you.  It belongs to the school.  And since I’m assuming we both are paying some sort of tuition to be here - correct me if I’m wrong - we each have equal claim to this table.”

Betty swallowed hard and stammered, “A gentleman would give up the table.”

The boy crossed his arms over his chest and leaned back.  “Well, then I guess it’s a good thing I’m not a gentleman.  Well, for me.  Not you.”

Something about his cool demeanor set Betty off, and she narrowed her eyes before she snapped, “This isn’t over.”

----

“I hate him.  He’s such a jerk.  Can you believe what a jerk he is?”

“He sounds hot,” Veronica said between bites of French fries.  “Is he hot?”

“That’s beside the point.”

Veronica’s eyes widened.  “Oh, B, that is 100% the point now!”

Betty ignored her and mused, “Is pulling the fire alarm when he's at the table too much?”  Veronica stared at her and Betty quickly said,  “Yeah, it’s too much.  I know it’s too much.”

“Seriously, though, why does he have you so hot and bothered?  That one girl who smells like soup used to sit there, too, and you never went on about her this much.”

“I don’t know.  There’s just something about him.  He rubs me the wrong way.”

Veronica raised her eyebrows and Betty said, “If you say anything about him rubbing me the right way, I will throw my coffee at you.”

Veronica smiled sweetly and said, “It never even crossed my mind.”

“Sure it didn’t."

“If you want the table so much, why don’t you just talk to him?  See if you can work out a sort of custody arrangement.”

“A custody arrangement for a table?”

“Yes.  You get it on “x” days.  He gets them on “y” days.  Problem solved.”

“That’s actually not a terrible idea,” Betty said.  Half of her annoyance with him came from her going to the table to find that he was there.  That would be removed entirely if she knew definitively when he’d be there.

The next day, Betty found him at her table and floated the idea to him.

“You want to set up a custody arrangement for a table?”

“I think the end will justify the unconventional means,”  Betty said crisply.  She held out her hand.  “So, what do you say?”

He hesitated before reaching out and shaking her hand.  “I’m Jughead, by the way.”

"I’m Betty.”

----

They co-existed peacefully with their arrangement, Betty happily claiming the table on Monday/Wednesday/Friday and allowing Jughead residence on Tuesday/Thursday/Sunday.  They even switched days a few times, Jughead coming to see her near the end of her study session to approve the arrangement.  A few weeks in, he started leaving her notes.

 The table was a bit rude today.  You probably should talk to it.

- Jughead

Some jerk carved a misspelled Spanish swear word into the side of the table.  Should we consider counseling?

- Jughead

Betty didn’t know how she was supposed to feel about his notes, but she found herself looking forward to them.  After a bit, she even left her own.

The table seemed sad today.  I think it may not be getting enough attention.

- Betty

Please reiterate to the table how sorry I am for spilling that cup of coffee.  I promise to be a better occupant.

- Betty

----

“Can you guys just date already?”  Veronica asked after several months of note swapping and table-sitting.  “Or go back to when you hated him?”

“It’s not like that,” Betty said.  

“I think you need to see him outside of the library.  Have a normal interaction.  Why don’t you invite him to the Delta party this weekend.”

“How are we getting into the Delta party?”

“Archie.  Don’t worry, he said I can bring people.  Invite him!”

Betty was reluctant, although there was truth in what Veronica was hedging at.  Things had seemed to shift between her and Jughead, and while she didn't quite know how she felt about it, she wasn’t opposed to exploring what it might be.  So, that afternoon - one of his days - she strolled over to him and invited him out.

“Really?” he asked with mild hesitance.

“Yes, really.  Unless you don’t want to go.  If you don’t, then-”

“No,” he said quickly.  “That sounds nice.  Thanks.”

“Good,” Betty said, rocking a bit on her heels.  “So, I’ll see you then.”

“See you then.”

----

Betty chose one of her favorite outfits for the party and ignored Veronica when she said that proved she had a thing for Jughead.  She anxiously waited for him to show up and when he did, she was surprised - and disappointed - to discover that he brought someone else with him.  Betty recognized her after a second.  Toni Tapaz.  She was one of those girls who was effortlessly cool.  Absolutely the type she could see with Jughead.  Betty took in Toni’s leather leggings and crop top and thought to herself how juvenile her own yellow jumper must look in comparison.

Betty noticed that he wasn’t wearing his usual grey beanie and there was a surprisingly nice shock of ink black hair where the beanie normally sat.  

“Hi Jughead.”

“Hey Betty.  This is Toni.”

“Yeah, I think we have British literature together,” Betty said, nodding toward Toni.  “It’s great to see you.”

“Totally,” Toni said.  “This party is kick ass.  Thanks for the invite.”

Betty looked over at Jughead and murmured, “Absolutely.”

“I’m going to grab a drink,” Toni said.  She saw that Betty already held a cup and asked Jughead, “You want one?”

“Um, yeah, sure.  Do you want me to come with?”

“Nah, you stay here.  I’ll be back.”

Betty watched Toni disappear into the crowd.  “I didn’t know you knew her.  Although, I guess I don’t know that much about you.”

“We’ve known each other for a while.  So, how exactly did you find this party?  It doesn’t really seem like you.”

“That’s because it’s not.  My best friend is dating someone in the fraternity.”

“Ah, that makes much more sense.”

Betty nodded, watching Toni make her way back to them.  She didn’t know how the girl got drinks so fast, nor did she know why it made her stomach squirm when she sidled up to Jughead and slid her hand over his shoulder as she handed him his drink.

“Well, I should go and find Veronica,” Betty said with a tight smile.  “I hope you guys enjoy the party.”

Betty made a beeline for Veronica and Archie, and then at the last moment swerved to the right and left the party, throwing a final glance toward Jughead and Toni.  Veronica watched her with concern and followed that last turn of Betty’s head before she left.  Her eyes narrowed when she saw Jughead and another girl.  Veronica handed Archie her drink.

“I need to go take care of something.”

She marched over to Jughead and said, “You and I need to have a little chat.” She looked over at Toni and asked, “Can I steal your friend for a minute?”

“Yeah, sure.  Jug, I’ll be over by the beer pong.”

Jughead nodded and then looked over at Veronica.  “I’m sorry, who are you?”

“I’m Veronica.  Betty’s best friend.  And because she won’t say something,  I will.  Why the hell would you bring another girl to something she invited you to?”

“Why does it matter?”

Veronica sighed.  “Because she likes you, dummy.  She probably doesn’t even realize it yet, but she likes you.  And this was the first of many long, tedious and arguably convoluted steps for her to realize it.  Which you, for the record, have completely bungled.  Honestly, I don’t know if you two can get past this.”

“She likes me,” Jughead repeated.  “Huh.”

Veronica shook her head.  “Okay.  Clearly you both are terrible at this.  She likes you.  You clearly like her.  You need to go and try to make this right.  She’s over at Dunphy Hall, room number -”

“She’s not going to her room,” Jughead interrupted.  He could picture her.  “I know where she’s going.”

Veronica smiled and for the first time since he met her, Jughead was not moderately terrified of her.  “I knew I was right about you.  Now, shoo!”

----

Betty sat at their table, running her fingertips along the smooth edges. She was still moderately buzzed from the party, which was probably why she didn’t hear him coming.  She didn’t even know he was there until he was standing right in front of her.  He cleared his throat once.  Twice.  On the third time she told him, “Don't ask me for a throat drop because I don’t have any.”

He laughed slightly.  “That probably wasn’t my best opening line.”

“It wasn’t very charming.”

He settled on the edge of the table and remarked, “You left the party quickly.”

“I wasn’t really in a partying mood.  Where’s Toni?  You two seemed in a partying mood.”

“Turns out I really wasn't,” he said.  “And she’s still there.”

Betty looked up at him.  “Doesn’t that bother you?”

“Toni’s been doing her own thing since we were five.  So, no, not really.”

Betty considered that for a moment and said, “I thought you two were...”

“I know.  But we’re not.  We tried it for about a day in junior high and then promised to never try it again.  We’re better off as friends.”

Betty nodded, looking down at the table again.  “I didn’t like it when I saw her with you.  I don’t know why.  But I didn't like it.”

“I don’t think I would have liked it if I saw you with another guy, either.”

She looked up at him.  “You wouldn’t?”

He shook his head.  “No, I wouldn’t.”

Betty considered this for a moment and then said, “I think I like you.”

She winced afterwards and he laughed.

“Saying that probably shouldn't cause you physical pain.  But, you know what, who am I to judge?  I think I like you, too.  Actually, no.”

“No?”

“No,” he said resolutely.  “I know I like you.  I’ve known since you first yelled at me at this table.  There aren’t many people who would get so worked up over library seating.”

“It was about more than a table.”

“I know,” he said in a sobering voice.  And then, she understood that he did know.  That he, just like her, had his own hopes and dreams and fears pinned to that table, and as ridiculous as it all was, it was real, nonetheless.  They were real.

She scooted over in the seat and gestured for him to join her.  They didn’t quite fit, so she maneuvered herself up on his lap.  His arms settled comfortably around her waist and she placed her hands lightly on his shoulders.  She didn’t know who leaned in first, but time seemed to stand still as their mouths met softly.  They stayed close, mouths barely touching and breath intermingling, when she softly murmured, “I still get the table Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays, right?”

[deadcactuswalking]

REVIEWING THE CHARTS: 3rd November 2019

I apologise for how late this will probably end up being posted, but we have a big week to talk about, with EIGHT new arrivals, two from Selena Gomez, three from Kanye West and two appearing here in the top 10 so I’m just going to get through everything as soon as possible to the best of my ability, although this week has several...mishaps on the BBC page to say the least, so I’ll try to correct them if I can, and I have had to wait for my week of non-stop Weezer listening to end or for me to accidentally slip up and listen to something else so I could actually write about the new arrivals here.

Top 10

Interestingly, none of the nonsense that this chart week ensued seems to appear in the top 2 or shake the #1 at all, as “Dance Monkey” by Tones and I is at its fifth consecutive week at the top of the UK Singles Chart.

“Ride It” by Regard featuring Jay Sean – well, it’s actually a remix of a Jay Sean single but just let me relish in the fact Jay Sean is on the charts again – isn’t moving either at number-two, the runner-up spot.

The first impact that we can see at the top level of the charts is the debut at #3 for Selena Gomez’s first US #1 “Lose You to Love Me”, which the BBC has interestingly misspelled as “Loose You to Love Me”, her 13th UK Top 40 hit, fourth top 10 and highest-peaking song ever, after “It Ain’t Me” with Kygo peaked at #7. We’ll talk more about Selena Gomez’s two new arrivals later.

Thanks to Gomez, Post Malone’s “Circles” is down one spot to number-four.

At number-five is Ed Sheeran with “South of the Border” featuring Camila Cabello and Cardi B, down three spots this week to number-five.

We have our second new arrival within the top 10, at number-six, “Follow God” by Kanye West from his ninth studio album, JESUS IS KING. He has several songs debuting here in the UK Top 40 this week, so we’ll talk more in-depth about his mini-album bomb later on, but this is his 44th UK Top 40 hit, which is crazy impressive, and his 20th top 10.

At number-seven, boosted up 11 spots by an Ariana Grande remix, is Lizzo with “Good as Hell”, making it officially her biggest song in the UK and her first top 10 hit, as well as Grande’s 16th.

Up two spaces to number-eight this week is “Memories” by Maroon 5.

Down two spaces from last week, we have Dermot Kennedy at number-nine with “Outnumbered”.

Finally, at #10, to round off the top 10, we have Lewis Capaldi’s “Bruises” down four spaces from last week.

Climbers

Naturally, there aren’t many climbers here because of the album bomb and influx of new arrivals, but we do have some unfortunate boosts for “hot girl bummer” by blackbear up five spaces to #25... and that’s all.

Fallers

Fallers on the other hand... we could split this up into genre, actually.

For pop, rock and EDM, we can start with “Lights Up” by Harry Styles deservedly flopping six spaces down to #17, then continue with “10,000 Hours” by Dan + Shay and Justin Bieber down 12 to #29, “Higher Love” by Kygo and Whitney Houston down eight to #31, “Sorry” by Joel Corry featuring uncredited vocals from Hayley May down 10 to #32 and finally “Don’t Call Me Angel” by Ariana Grande featuring Miley Cyrus and Lana Del Rey down 13 to #39 – but that’s not all.

For hip hop and R&B, we have “HIGHEST IN THE ROOM” by Travis Scott down seven to #12, “Be Honest” by Jorja Smith and Burna Boy down five to #14, “Professor X” by Dave down seven to #21, “Take Me Back to London” by Ed Sheeran featuring Stormzy and remixed by Sir Spyro featuring Aitch and Jaykae down nine to #28, “Playing Games” by Summer Walker down nine to #33, “Ladbroke Grove” by AJ Tracey down 10 to #35 and finally, “Taste (Make it Shake)” by Aitch down nine to #39... but again, that’s not all.

Dropouts & Returning Entries

We have no returning entries but we sure do have a lot of dropouts, some of them genuine hits such as “Strike a Pose” by Young T & Bugsey and Aitch out from #36 and “Beautiful People” by Ed Sheeran featuring Khalid out from #39, hits that never really hit the landing with the British general public but have been on the middling section of the charts for a while and could easily rebound like “Motivation” by Normani out from #27, “Truth Hurts” by Lizzo and remixed by DaBaby from #31, “frick, i’m lonely” by LAUV and Anne-Marie out from #32 and “Lalala” by Y2K and bbno$ and remixed by Carly Rae Jepsen and Enrique Iglesias out from #37, as well as some genuinely premature drop-outs such as “Graveyard” by Halsey out from #29 and finally, “47” by Sidhu Moose Wala, MIST, Steel Banglez and Stefflon Don out from #38. Now, finally, after all that time spent on stray UK Top 40 observations... let’s talk about Kanye.

ALBUM BOMB: Kanye West – JESUS IS KING

On October 25th, Kanye released his ninth studio album, JESUS IS KING, after missing several release dates and changing name from YANDHI. Kanye, a now born-again Christian, makes a “gospel” album free of any explicit lyrics, accompanied by a short film of the same name. It features an all-star guest list of vocalists and producers, including frequent collaborators Ant Clemons, Benny Blanco and Mike Dean, the reunion of legendary rap group Clipse, trap beat-makers Pi’erre Bourne and Ronny J, and smooth jazz saxophonist Kenny G. Obviously, it went #1 in the US, #2 here, but to mixed reviews – now, I won’t be focusing on the politics that surround the album and I am not very knowledgeable of religion so I cannot really comment on much beyond my understanding of Christianity and arguably more importantly, the lore of Kanye West. Mark Grondin of Spectrum Pulse already quoted more Bible quotes in his album review than I could remember digits of pi, and several people, like DeadEndHipHop, Sean Cee and even Anthony Fantano, whether you like them or not, have made several in-depth discussion videos about whether West’s sudden revelation is a genuine moment for the rapper, a mental breakdown or a cash-grab. I’m here to discuss the music... but even that’s not very good. I wrote a very lengthy review for the album two days after it came out (And before it went through an additional few fixes for mixing quirks, sigh) which will be linked here if I remember, and overall, it was disappointing, a light 4/10 and easily the worst record in West’s discography. Regardless, let’s talk about the debuts here.

#20 – “Closed on Sunday” – Kanye West

Produced by Kanye West, Angel Lopez, Brian “AllDay” Miller, Federico Vindver and Timbaland – Peaked at #17 in the US

Features uncredited vocals from the Sunday Service choir and A$AP Bari(?)

The most memeable yet also one of the most detestable tracks on the album, this is his 45th UK Top 40 hit. “Closed on Sunday” was one of the few tracks set to fail off the pure concept, as the biggest issue with most songs on JESUS IS KING is the lack of development or complete mishandling of great ideas, to the point where there basically is no effort to, you know, write a song here. “Closed on Sunday” is essentially one verse split into half due to a flow switch at the midpoint, and despite a runtime of only two minutes and 32 seconds, it drones on endlessly, with a solemn guitar melody leading into what could sound like a pretty cool, dark ballad, built up by the choir vocalising in harmonies that sound actually pretty great but then the 808s come in and ruin any sense of harmony. Kanye comes in with some of the worst mixing I’ve ever heard vocals have, especially on an album with the budget Kanye has, with a lot of background noise and I can even hear the buttons pressed on the phone or other device Kanye is using to record at about 0:38, which signals a drastic change in how the vocals are mixed, but it’s still shoddy and allows them to have some pretty severe clipping during the “chorus”, until a sudden shift where a turgid beeping sound works as a pathetic excuse for you know, an actual synth, and until now, Kanye’s vocals have not had reverb or Auto-Tune added onto them, so his vocals being drenched in effects actually sounds great here... but he still has a sore throat and sounds like he’s struggling here, although unlike “God Is” and just about the entirety of 808s & Heartbreak, where it adds to the emotive performance, Kanye sounds bored and with no choir backing him like they could have been, the release here just isn’t as cinematic as it could be and it just sounds like a melodramatic Kanye aimlessly spouting random Bible motifs over 808s without taking his daily Dequadin lozenge... and there are no drums... ever. Oh, and A$AP Bari comes in at the end to shout “Chick-fil-A”, abruptly interrupting the beat’s natural progression and making it clear as day that the album is unfinished. Also, speaking of those lyrics, should you really be comparing YOURSELF to a fast food restaurant that donates charity to anti-LGBT hate and pressure groups? That’s not very Christ-like, Ye. It probably wouldn’t matter if they didn’t either, because a thinly-veiled Taylor Swift reference (Yes, I know the Bible mentions “snakes” and “vipers” as much as reputation does, but the two aren’t on good terms so it’s no coincidence in my opinion) and calling God your “number-one with the lemonade” don’t exactly make you sound like a wordsmith. Oh, and A$AP Bari, the uncredited vocalist on the outro, pleaded guilty to sexual assault earlier this year, which again doesn’t exactly sound like a Christ-like thing to be supporting either... but I digress. The version he performed on Jimmy Kimmel with a genuine choir backing him and a brass band is miles ahead of this, so don’t bother with this version, or better yet, don’t bother with this monotonous crap at all.

#19 – “Selah” – Kanye West

Produced by Kanye West, E*vax, BoogzDaBeast, Federico Vindver, benny blanco and Francis Starlite – Peaked at #19 in the US

Features uncredited vocals from the Sunday Service choir, Ant Clemons and Bongo ByTheWay

Now, I’m slightly more positive on his 46th UK Top 40 hit, “Selah”, the opening track (Aside from the short “Every Hour” interlude / intro track which is only Sunday Service) of JESUS IS KING, yet that might actually make it more frustrating and it’s easily the track I come back the least to because overall, it’s actually pretty uninteresting and doesn’t have a true “hook”. It starts with some cloudy synth noodling that sounds kind of cool with the subtle strings but then Kanye comes in with some pretty awfully-mixed vocals that is incredibly unprofessional, teasing his fans for wanting YANDHI, and saying it was coming before “Jesus Christ did the laundry”, and quoting John 8:33 to excuse his “Slavery is a choice” comment, which he’s been trying to respond to the backlash to for about a year and a half now, failing each time. Also:

Pour the lean out slower

Hold up –that ain’t Christ-like. The explosions of marching band drums come in in a similar fashion to “Feel the Love” off of KIDS SEE GHOSTS, and then honestly the bridge, which is insanely repetitive but builds up tension perfectly with Ant Clemons and the Sunday Service choir repeating “Hallelujah” incessantly with distant guitar strings, handclaps and sudden pitch shifts reflecting the change in Kanye’s mindset and the intensity soon becomes a lot more ramped up from now on, finishing the bridge with a pretty beautiful vocal line that the 808s hilariously harmonise with. Then, Kanye comes back in with a verse co-written by Pusha T, and you can REALLY tell, and it’s still awfully-mixed, when there’s no true excuse. He’s drowned out by the bursts of drums and bass as well as the choir’s recurring vocal sample. The best part of the song soon kind of fizzles out in a chaotic outro, in which fireworks literally go off while Kanye screams nonsense as well as “Yeezus” which isn’t exactly Christ-like, but it sounds insane and honestly a tad odd and unfitting for the album, which is supposed to be an uptempo Christian rap album? While there are parts of this song I don’t approve of, especially Kanye, who ruins pretty much every song he’s on... on his own album, this is pretty tolerable, albeit somewhat contradictory lyrically and far from my favourite Kanye track. At least there’s some grandiosity and emotion here.

#6 – “Follow God” – Kanye West

Produced by Kanye West, BoogszDaBeast and Xcelence – Peaked at #7 in the US

I should be thankful for the grandiosity and emotion behind “Selah”, because this sure doesn’t have any of that. How the HELL does this have three producers? How on Earth does this album have 11 people on the mixing and mastering and yet this still sound like absolute gutter trash in my headphones? “Follow God” is easily the least interesting song on the JESUS IS KING album, and that’s pretty impressive for a record that contains the song “Water” with Ant Clemons, yet it’s the biggest and I don’t see why at all. There straight-up isn’t a chorus by any meaning of the word, or its many synonyms, and its dated production almost resembling 90s hip hop in the soul sample from 1974’s “Can You Lose by Following God” by Whole Truth and the genuine 90s groove and funk that is somewhere here in the beat, doesn’t exactly make it sound like a catchy trap banger that would reach the US top 10 in 2019, but it’s there. It’s called by many fans a spiritual successor to 2016’s “Father Stretch My Hands” from The Life of Pablo but other than using the lyric “Father, I stretch my hands”, I don’t see it, mostly because the 2016 effort doesn’t actually have much relation to Christianity outside of the beautiful gospel choir harmonising with Caroline Shaw on the bridge of that single. In fact, that song does a better job at flipping Christian rap on its head – it’s a two-part trap banger featuring verses from Desiigner and lines about... bleached posteriors. This song on the other hand is only one minute and 44 seconds, with one badly-mixed and distorted verse from Kanye that is as repetitive as the mind-numbing recurring “Yeah” vocal sample and prone to making me roll my eyes with its one verse and the... outro of sorts. But since this beat is so minimalistic, surely he wants us to hear what he’s saying, right? Well, no, probably not, because not only is his “wordplay”(?) and half-rhymes embarrassing, but I have so many questions to raise to this drum pattern. I want to interview the 808 and the kick drum and ask what the heck they think they’re doing.

People really know you, push your buttons like type-write

That’s not a sentence. “Like type-write”? Excuse my brief, unsubtle blasphemy, but Jesus.

Every single night, right? Every single fight, right?

The ‘i’-based rhyme scheme here is cool in concept and he finds his way around it pretty well, in a fast-paced rap flow that I actually really like, but it reeks of laziness, especially since not only does he completely abandon the rhyme scheme 55 seconds in but – yes, I counted – his verse is 69 seconds, that’s one minute and nine seconds. To put into perspective, Rick Ross’ verse on “Devil in a New Dress” off of Kanye’s 2010 album My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy is one minute and 28 seconds, only twenty seconds longer than this one, and it includes ten times as much clever wordplay, story-telling, interesting flow switches and bars that are really epic, making the song feel really celebratory of sorts actually – and that’s without the epic guitar solo that precedes it. What a fantastic song. On the other hand, this song is substance-less and Kanye says very little of anything despite how much he crams into every bar in the rapid yet sometimes pretty awkward flow. What he’s supposed to be discussing is his situation with his father and how when he was yelling at him and having a massive argument and fall-out, Ray West told him, it wasn’t Christ-like, leading to a revelation and possibly becoming the catalyst for the already-kickstarted Christian rebirth. Surely, his dad and God are the two most important men in his life, right? Then why does this feel passionless and boring? Why doesn’t this feel genuine? Fellow Christian rapper NF, a white rapper who makes bland piano-lead pop-rap with sung hooks, would call this flavourless, dull and more importantly, grey. It doesn’t feel blue and gold like he wants it to as he uses the colours to imply royalty, luxury and loyalty to God on the album cover and lyric video. This doesn’t show loyalty. You made this in five minutes, Kanye. You made this on a whim because you had an idea and you ran with it but you had no idea on how to actually develop it into something interesting or even listenable. What part of this shows royalty, luxury and a rich, graceful connection with God? This sounds cheap and gross, and frankly incredibly disappointing from such a talented artist. I haven’t even gotten onto the rest of the song, man, and I don’t even want to. “Decimal” doesn’t rhyme with “wrestle”, Kanye. “Wrestlin’ with God, I don’t even want to wrestle”? That’s the deepest you want to go into your confusion and conflict between Christianity and fame? That’s pathetic, as is the random screaming at the end of this track for quirky or emotive bonus points. There’s nothing lifelike or Christ-like about your lifestyle, Kanye West. Get some help.

NEW ARRIVALS

#34 – “Nice to Meet Ya” – Niall Horan

Produced by Julian Bunetta – Peaked at #9 in Ireland and #83 in the US

Sorry to any of the Niall Horan fans who crashed his website when this single was announced, but I have considerably less to say about the rest of these new arrivals than I do about Kanye West and/or Jesus Christ. I have to talk about them regardless of if I have anything I can actually add, and this one is one I’ve actually already heard since I watched the MTV EMAs and he performed it. I thought nothing of it initially, but this is the Irishman from One Direction’s comeback single after his debut studio album Flicker. This is Horan’s third UK Top 40 hit and first since 2017’s “Too Much to Ask” which peaked at #24, and I did not expect this shift to late 90s and early 2000s dance-rock, but I am definitely not complaining. It starts with a catchy piano line that’s pretty Robbie Williams-esque, then the drop comes in and it is killer. The sleek synths decorating the rock drums in a lot of slickness that you wouldn’t expect out of such a meek stage presence add to the chorus pretty well, but the best part of that chorus is the distant pitch-shifted vocal sample yelling in the background, making it feel even more industrial which again is out of character for Niall, the quiet, shy folk boy, but he definitely has the charisma to pull off this type of swaggering, stomping pop rock anthem, and he proves that in the sing-along bridge, where even his murmuring hums stand out, and while he’s drowned out by the cool bassline and drum pattern most of the time, his vocal delivery really is the highlight of the song, even if that is equally vintage and in a way, pretty nostalgic for the era it replicates. Funnily enough, it has the same lack of care for organised structure that “Lights Up” by Harry Styles had just two weeks ago, but the careless, reckless groove of this song works a lot more in Horan’s favour than Styles’. Just saying.

#27 – “Orphans” – Coldplay

Produced by Rik Simpson, Dan Green, Bill Rahko, Max Martin, Angel Lopez and Federico Vindver – Peaked at #14 in Scotland

Coldplay, with their most recent upcoming album Everyday Life, are getting pretty experimental. It’s an hour-long double-album kept a secret until a month before it is set to release featuring a track list full of songs that have odd stylisations like “BrokEn” and share song names with Arabic poems. “Arabesque”, the B-side to “Orphans”, is a storm of nu-jazz trumpets with a Fela Kuti-inspired breakdown and uncredited guest vocals from Stromae, as well as profanity, which is a first for the band. I’m not surprised at all that one didn’t kick off but we are instead left with their 24th UK Top 40 hit and first since “Something Just Like This” with the Chainsmokers peaked at #2 in 2017, “Orphans”, which is a lot tamer of a track to say the least. That doesn’t mean it’s any worse though. It starts with a kids’ choir singing before we get into a tropical rock jam with a funky bassline that I wouldn’t be surprised if Flea wrote, it’s that tight. Chris Martin sounds as focused on Christianity as he did on the Avicii album earlier this year, directly name-dropping Heaven in the first verse, and then joining in with the nonsense words that the vocal samples had been repeating prior to the verse. The chorus is pretty reminiscent of arena rock, specifically “Paradise” I feel as it has that same nasal falsetto but in a lot more palatable fashion, mostly because this actually has groove and you know, a pulse. Yeah, this is pretty great, and I love the bridge of purely the mythical guitar and Chris Martin’s ethereal vocals. Something I didn’t notice on initial listen is how that the song is about a girl, Rosaleem, during the Damascus bombing in Syria from last year (That’s what the nonsense words and sound effects are all about), who is greeted by angels who talk to her about what Heaven will be like, which is “almond and peach trees in bloom” but also a place for her dad to get drunk and talk with his friends so he can feel young again. That’s actually pretty deep subject matter, and together with Niall Horan, I’m glad we can have some fantastic rock on the charts again. “Arabesque” is the better of the two Coldplay songs though.

#26 – “Look at Her Now” – Selena Gomez

Produced by Ian Kirkpatrick – Peaked at #7 in Slovakia and #27 in the US

Man, those last two songs were so powerful and organic, I almost want some disposable garbage to review next. It’ll just be easier. Oh, we have two Selena Gomez songs and a new AJ Tracey single to cover? Perfect, that’s just what I asked for! Yeah, this is Selena Gomez’s 14th UK Top 40 hit and it is awful, but not even close to as offensively bad “Closed on Sunday” or “Follow God” are. It’s just a mistake on all fronts. The passionless vocal samples drowned out in the background that peters out by the verse and the nothingness of the synths and a glitchy beat that abruptly kicks itself out of the mix every other second, as well as Selena Gomez’s weak, whispery vocals don’t exactly scream “passionate, boasting kiss-off” to me. The chorus is absolutely PATHETIC, if it even exists at all – I mean, it’s just a bunch of different sound effects Selena Gomez made pretty much, with her rhythmically humming as if that’s an excuse for an actual chorus with some unintelligible, stuttering and sometimes whispered repetitions of the song title as well as several “W-w-w-w-wow”s that add very little to the song and seem pretty pointless. This is mixed well for the most part, despite the synths clipping at times and Selena’s vocoder-ed ad-libs in the second chorus being way louder than anything else in the mix, but I have no idea what the composers of this song were thinking. What a trainwreck. It almost sounds like glitch-pop to be honest, it’s chaos, and if it were marketed as that maybe I’d appreciate it more, but if this is supposed to be a genuine brag to Justin Bieber asking him to see what he’s missing, he might as well have dated a robot. I think a RateYourMusic user summed it up best: “This is so monumentally mediocre that it barely even exists.”

#22 – “Floss” – AJ Tracey featuring MoStack and Not3s

Produced by The Elements and AJ Tracey

AJ Tracey is a British rapper who had his break out this year and he released his self-titled debut studio album back in February, but it now has a deluxe edition, with five extra songs, this being one of them. I wasn’t exactly impressed with the album as it’s mostly pretty bland Americanised trap fluff with only some promising elements of dancehall (“Butterflies” with Not3s and remixed by Popcaan), grime (“Horror Flick”) and UK garage (“Ladbroke Grove”, one of my favourite songs of the year) propping up whenever AJ sees fit, but it’s 48 minutes so these moments can’t carry the whole track listing. Lucky for us, he’s increased that runtime to just over an hour and included a couple more boring trap songs to listen to. Joy. This is AJ’s seventh UK Top 40 hit, MoStack’s eighth and Not3’s sixth. This song relies on a pretty sweet falsetto vocal sample under a surprisingly energetic trap beat, with some pretty nice steel pans and cowbells in addition to the skittering hi-hats and 808s. AJ Tracey is pretty okay here, but I feel with these lyrics and beat he could have gone for a faster and more impressive flow than what he brings out here. I’m still in love with his “bling-blaow” ad-lib though. MoStack is embarrassing as always, with an oddly-mixed verse and sometimes off-beat flow, with the most obvious difference between him and AJ being that there aren’t any ad-libs or multi-tracked vocals, which is mostly the same with Not3s’ non-existent and actually pretty unnecessary bridge (He should have just added to the final chorus, though his last few bars sound nice). Mo does have a pretty funny line about how you wouldn’t be able to notice him on CCTV and would confuse him with Dave though. This is better than I expected, but still nothing of interest to me. Sorry.

#3 – “Lose You to Love Me” – Selena Gomez

Produced by Mattman & Robin and FINNEAS – Peaked at #1 in the US

Now, much like Coldplay, Selena Gomez also released two lead singles, however both charted and they are drastically different to Coldplay’s, quality-wise at least. This is supposed to be the big massive smash ballad hit that hit #1 in the US, becoming her first ever song to reach that peak, but I can’t bring myself to care, because honestly, this is one of her least interesting singles she’s ever released. Out of all of her songs, including some I actually like such as “It Ain’t Me” and “Same Old Love”, this seems like one of the most unlikely #1s yet it tugs at our heartstrings with the pianos from FINNEAS, Billie Eilish’s brother and producer, and it’s about how Justin Bieber dumped her with wordplay revolving around “purpose” – wow, it’s almost like she’s talking about Justin Bieber’s ALBUM, Purpose! Ugh, her mind! Okay, I’ll stop mocking her fanbase and the general public, because this really isn’t a bad song. Selena Gomez can’t sing, so through thinly-veiled Auto-Tune, the producers cleverly multi-track her vocals to create a grand, powerhouse chorus out of the repetition of “To love, to love, yeah” and because it’s a pop ballad, the vocals can be breathy and untrained and it’s fine, right? It’s a ballad, it doesn’t need to be perfect, and hence we can take advantage of the complete lack of singing talent this person has. I don’t know, it just seems so cliché and predictable to me. You can only tell it’s a FINNEAS beat once the second verse hits and the synths get jerkier with the bass wobbles, and he usually has a pretty signature sound, so yeah, that’s the best way to put it. Or, perhaps, this song is also so monumentally mediocre that it barely even exists.

Conclusion

Again, I’m sorry this is out so late but it was a big ordeal to write, especially due to all the Kanye songs. I’ll try and get the next one out a lot sooner, I assure you, but there’s an album bomb this week too, so we’ll see about that. Anyways, the Best of the Week is going to Coldplay for “Orphans”, who just barely edged out Niall Horan, who gets the Honourable Mention, with “Nice to Meet Ya”. Worst of the Week should be obvious, in fact, it’s not going to a song, it’s going to three songs, all by Kanye West. “Saleh” isn’t all that bad, but JESUS IS KING was such an immense disappointment that I think he should be crowned Worst of the Week based on not only “Closed on Sunday” or God forbid “Follow God”, but also on principle alone. The Dishonourable Mention is going to Selena Gomez for “Look at Her Now” for being hilariously misguided in the production area, Jesus. I’m going to wrap this week up with a Top 40 ranking of the whole chart on Twitter, which I’ll try to do bi-weekly, no guarantee, so follow me there @cactusinthebank for more musical ramblings and shoddy attempts at humour, and I’ll be seeing you here again next week. Peace!

[captain-spookycandycollecti-blog]

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I'm 18 soon and will be wanting to start driving but the cheapest quote i can get is 6000 etc on a 1.0 litre vauxhall corsa, There is no one i can get a policy with as my mum doesn't drive. is there any suggestions? only British people will understand this problem

Why do we care about the people who have no health insurance?

they chose not to get insurance... they chose to by 200 dollar shoes over health insurance.. why do i have to pay for them?????? why am i responsible for someone elses well being? i thought adults were good on their own. i would pay taxes for sal healthcare for ALL children but the adults can go **** themselves who dont have it. its not my problem. i dont have many things that i want to get... i dont see anyone else buying the things i want...

Life Insurance for my family?

I'm trying to figure out if it will be worth to get life insurance for my family? Now, when I say family I mean my parents and siblings. I'm only concern with getting something that's affordable like term insurance I didn't hear to many good things about whole insurance.""

How much will it cost me to register my motorcycle its a ninja 250 i live in florida ?

i am 17. please do not judge me on my age. also how much am i looking at for insurance ? who do you recommend ? allstate, progressive, geico, statefarm ? how about insurance providers that are big known companies? i dont know the word im looking for.""

""I have experience working in the health insurance industry, now im wondering what job I could apply for?

I worked as a medical case manager at an insurance company. We were a 3rd party company. I did phone interviews with people applying for individual insurance for several ...show more

""USAA auto insurance 3,000 dollars a year for 2 cars?""

That's the quote I got and it's really ridiculously expensive. I'm in the US Army, I was expecting a rate cheaper than my current insurance, not 3 times more expensive. Is it like this for everyone? Maybe because I'm just in the DEP right now? I heard I could just get the insurance straight after DEPing in.""

What are some cons of medical doctors not taking insurance?

What are some cons of medical doctors not taking insurance?

Getting out of a speeding ticket for insurance purposes?

Is there a way I can get out of a speeding/failure to meet at a stop sign ticket? I really don't care about paying the ticket or court costs at all, but I just can not, really, really, can not pay the extra insurance money. I am paying out of state tuition AND I am in Architecture. Architecture is SUCH an expensive major. The police officer (whose name I can't even read on the ticket because it is just a scribble) gave me a ticket for speeding and failure to stop at a stop sign. I have always been a great driver, I never speed, I always stop at stop signs, I don't drink/text/talk over the phone and drive, I always have my seatbelt on. This one time I absolutely needed to get home at 2am I decide to go a little faster and yup, of course I get a ticket. I don't want to lie, I was doing 36 on a 20 zone at the time, I admit it even though I honestly did not realize I was going at 36 I didn't' do it on purpose. I didn't think hey I'm just gonna go faster because no one is around , I really honestly did not notice I was going at 36. But I am not sure about the stop sign thing. Honestly I was not paying much attention because I drive through this stop sign everyday but I distinctly remember there was a car already at the stop sign coming from the left so I HAD to stop. There was absolutely no one else coming from any of the four sides, so I might have not stopped completely but I did slow down almost to a stop and then kept going. Then like I said I was going at 36 on a 20 zone. This was at 2 a clock in the morning when there was literally not a soul around. The police officer was practically hiding in a dark, empty parking lot and came out of no where. I really don't want to make excuses for myself. I know what I did was wrong and I'll admit it. But this is my first ticket, and I really don't want t have to pay so much more money on my insurance for a slip as small as this one. My boyfriend was with mi in the car if that means anything. I really don't know, I've never had a ticket before. I've been reading up on how to get out of a ticket, and a lot of people say it is good to talk to the officer, and I thought about doing it but the officer's name is not readable at all. He also completely misspelled my name. In Puerto Rico we use both my father's and mother's last names so I have two last names. Let's say my name is X, my father's last name is Y and my mother's is Z. In Puerto Rico it goes like X Y Z and since my license is from Puerto Rico that is how it is written in my license. But the police officer wrote X Z. So my name is wrong in the ticket. I don't know if that counts for anything, someone told me that if they misspell my name or the officer's it means the ticket is dropped. This seems unlikely but hey, like I said I really have no clue. Again, I don't want to make excuses for myself, but I just can't afford extra insurance costs. I just cant...""

Adding someone to your car insurance policy?

I'm a new teen driver and as you may all know insurance rates are sky high. I was wondering if a family member, who doesn't live with me, can add me to their insurance policy? If yes, does the car have to be in their name? Or do I have to have the same address in order for them to add me?""

What happens if you just don't pay your car insurance?

Where I live you get car insured and they put a sticker on the plates with expiry date a year from now. But you still only pay once a month. What happens if you simply stop paying ...show more

Insurance Quotes With AAA ?

I requoted myself online with AAA, I've been with them for 9-10 years or so. And by filling out the same information with same coverages, I will save much more. Will AAA give me that new rate or am I stuck with my same rate. I hate calling customer service..""

How come a 7 year old Dodge truck costs more to insure than a new Lexus RX350?

Full insurance: Dodge - $1400 Lexus - $900 Why??????

Temporary test-drive car insurance for under 21s?

I am 19 years old and have just passed my driving test. I would like to buy my own little car now, but it's my understanding that I have to have insurance to test drive a car. Obviously there is little point in buying a year's worth of insurance for a car that i might not buy, but I'm struggling to find a company that offers 24 hour cover for young drivers, under the age of about 23. Any suggestions?? Do you know any companies that do provide cover for young divers?? I really don't want to have to buy a car without test-driving it, but I also don't want to wait 4 years. :(""

""If I am added as an added driver to a car, how much will the insurance be? Please see details:?""

If my parents were to get a mini 2004 for example, and they both have no claims and no license points, (so their insurance is about 350 each) how much would it cost to add me (a new driver aged 17) to their car. If one of parents was to be insured, and I was added as a named driver I mean. Roughly speaking. And yes, it would be a new car that my parents hadn't driven before. I am the UK by the way, so I am talking about  not $. Thank you for all contributions!""

What is the cheapest insurance?

i have a vauxhall corsa 1.0 litre im 17 and just passed and insurance quotes ive tried is 4000+pound a year anyone know any cheap insurance's thanks!!!!!

Car Insurance estimate for a 17 year old.?

How much do you think insurance will be for me (a 17 year old male) driving a Vauxhall Corsa 1.2L 2004? I have looked on websites for quotes but I am not yet 17 and you have to be in order to get a quote and I think they will check the household to make sure you are the right age. So any guesses on how much it should cost?

Do I sign the certificate of title when selling the car to the insurance company?

My vehicle was determined to be a total loss and I have decided to give up my car to the insurance company. They have asked me to send the certificate of title and the DMV form (Vehicle transfer and reassignment form). The odd thing is that the insurance company asked that I do not sign the title document, but asked that I sign the DMV form. Should I sign both documents, or just sign the DMV form (will that be enough to successfully transfer the vehicle?) What will happen if I end up signing the certificate of title, even when the insurance company told me not to??""

Motorcycle insurance question?

I've never been involved in an accident before and I dropped my bike in a parking lot learning 12 o clock wheelies and did a bunch of damage to my bike, maybe even totaling it. What do I tell my insurance company happened? Because they obviously won't cover my bike if they knew I was doing wheelies. Do I just tell them I slipped on some loose gravel and the bike fell or what?""

Is it true that I will have to buy health insurance or pay a fine?

I thought the whole purpose of the Affordable Care Act was to make healthcare available to everyone. Now I am being told that I have to buy it.

How can i get insurance for myself like not for a car?

my friend said he has insurance for himself so he can drive any car and be insured he doesn't have it for a specific car how can i get this

Touchet Washington Cheap car insurance quotes zip 99360

Touchet Washington Cheap car insurance quotes zip 99360

Person A driving person B's car and hits my car. Who's insurance pays?

Person A driving Person B's car. Person A backed up into my car. Who's insurance pays? Person A because he was driving? Person B because it's her car? Or my insurance because I have full coverage? What are the consequences if I file through my insurance company? Will my insurance go up even if it's not my fault? I think not but if you know for sure that would be helpful. Any and all information is helpful!! Thanks!

Can I get medicaid? (17 weeks pregnant)?

Okay here is the deal, I appreciate all of the help. Okay so I am 17 weeks pregnant and have cigna through my job but when I went to talk to HR today, I will have to be terminated when I take maternity leave because I will only be at the company for 11 months. ( need to be there a year ). So when I give birth, I wont have coverage, that is a bummer! I dunno what else to do but cancel my insurance and get medicaid, something I was trying to avoid but now I don't feel like there is an option, cause I can't cover the baby either with my companies health insurance... argh.. Can i still get medicaid even though I'm so far along??? I'm so scared and dunno wtf to do. Help!!!!!!!!!!!!! and BTW I am in the state of FL""

Looking for an insurance plan to switch to with good maternity?

I'm getting married in less than a month & will no longer be on my insurance, my husband to be can stay on his till he's 26 however my current job doesn't offer me ...show more""

Would this put a 15 year old on disability insurance?

(This isn't for me, it's for my younger sister, I've already left home) Okay so, my mother, although she's a doctor, is in pretty large amounts of debt and my sister Abby needs treatment for various mental illnesses (PTSD, Depression, BPD, General anxiety, Anorexia, all professionally diagnosed) She's 15, and she's currently failing school because she feels like she can't go to classes anymore so she just sits around the school (she has thoughts of failure all the time, but in class her thoughts are amped up and she can't concentrate on what she's doing because of the voices in her head). She's trying her hardest to deal with it all on her own, and she's gotten a little bit better (except for her eating disorder), but still thinks she needs help from a psychologist. Our mum can't afford one, and Abby's lost so much weight lately... Can she be put on disability insurance for this? She needs help, we can't afford it. We live in Australia, by the way.""

Where do you get cheap car insurance in Northern Ireland?

Hi Folks, I'm moving from Dumfries in Scotland shortly to Northern Ireland, my car insurance is going to double in price, just wondering where the best place to get insurance quotes, I tryed NI Compare and it was actually more expensive than Go Compare, many thanks""

Teen car insurance help help?

I am 18 years old and on my fathers state farm policy my mother has her own house and policy if I have car insurance under him can I be covered to drive her cars. she has geico

Motorcycle Insurance Question?

I was wondering how much insurance would cost for a 16 year old in California, driving a Ninja 500r would be. New driver, taken safety course, and stored in garage. What companies would insure me (I heard geico and progressive were good), and how much would it cost? Also what is the minimum amount of motorcycle insurance needed? Please answer with as much detail as possible. Thanks""

""Fast Cheap car, cheap to insure for 18 year old any ideas?

I am trying to find a fast used car (0-60 in less then 6.3 seconds w/ a manual tranny ) i would like it to be around $6k and cheap to insure (i am 18) I have thought about 1993-1997 ...show more

Where is the cheapest place to get motorcycle insurance?

I am 21 have a clean driving record and have a motorcycle permit. I got a quote of $30 a month that's with comprehensive with a deductible of $100. Is this probably as cheap as I can get?

Will my liability car insurance cover another car?

Okay, so the brakes of my car aren't functioning pretty well. So it stayed at a shop. Meanwhile, I am driving my mom's car. But its not insured. Will my insurance cover her car if anything? I reside in state of Texas.""

Is there an industry that does not utilize insurance?

I need to name one industry that does not utilize insurance. Please help! Thanks!

What is loss of service insurance?

Im a working mom had an accident which required me to stay home to recuperate. Will the loss of service insurance cover answer for my claim considering I will not earn for the days I am away from work?

Will my auto insurance rates go up if I get a red light camera ticket?

This is my first red light camera ticket but my second ticket this year. The first one was a speeding ticket. Will my auto insurance rates go up for a red light ticket?

What is the cheapest auto insurance?

Hi thanks for taking your time to answer this question... I have geico right now, but dont think its the cheapest insurance company I have... I dont really care if customer service is bad, as long as its cheap!!! so please tell me... WHATS A CHEAP INSURANCE COMPANY??? lol""

Do life insurance companies check your medical records after you die?

Let's say that you get life insurance and claim to be a non-smoker. Then let's say that you start smoking or resume smoking. Assuming that your medical records show that you smoked, will most life insurance companies check your records, see that you smoked, and then cancel your benefit?""

How much will auto insurance be for me?

I want to buy an eclipse,and im 20 years old. Had my license over a year. just want an average price""

Are jeep wranglers expensive to insure?

are jeep wranglers more expensive to insure than other cars? and how much is the average insurance rate of one?

Insurance for antique muscle cars?

Im 16 and i want an old 72 chevelle or a 71 nova but i dont know how much insurance would cost?

How much will a porsche 944 be in 4 years time and what will the insurance be if I'm 18?

It doesn't matter about fixing it as my uncle is a mechanic and I will be training soon.My uncle has got one now and I love it !!!

How much is car insurance for a teenager?

If the teenager is added to the parents policy, how much more will it cost the parent? Info: I have a good gpa, I will take drivers ed, my mom has a new car and its safe, and I have just turned 16.""

Cheap Car Insurance for young driver?

Hi, I'm 18, male and passed my driving test yesterday but when i looked on price comparrison sites it is extremely expensive even the ones that are supposed to be for young drivers, any tips on how to get cheap car insurance. The car is a 106 and i would like it to be fully comp. Thanks Ask for extra details""

Car insurance question.?

Can I have a car loan under my name and have the title under mine and my parents name as a main cosigner? Then have insurance under my parents name? Is it possible to have the title under my name with no cosigner and insurance under parents? I just want cheaper insurance that's all.

""If you have Amica car insurance, how much does 1 speeding ticket cost you?""

I live in Massachusetts. Have a perfect driving record but now I'm charged with 1 speeding ticket. How much more in insurance premiums will it cost me if I plead guilty? It's a regular speeding ticket, not DUI or wreckless driving. THanks""

Is it possible to cancel the signature of auto insurance for new car?

Hello, I have just bought a new car in a Toyota car dealer: They have found for me an insurance for the car, comparing with different insurance companies. But now at home, I am trying a quote with Geico, and it seems that I could probably get a better price with this company (not completely sure, I need to call them). Is it possible to cancel my signature as I did not receive the policy yet ? and I did not get my car yet (but tomorrow) ? I don't know if here in USA we have the possibility during some days (one week for example) to retract ourself.... Thanks for information.""

Insurance For first time driver?

So like i wanna get a car, and i live in the uk , how much would i be paying monthly for insurance?""

Touchet Washington Cheap car insurance quotes zip 99360

Touchet Washington Cheap car insurance quotes zip 99360

Credit scores taking a hit from homeowners insurance checks?

Hubby and I called around checking what rates would be for homeowners insurance, but I got a little ahead of myself, seeing that our closing date isn't until August! I called about 4 places, they all ran our credit and said it will be a light hit on the credit scores... Well how much of a hit will our credit scores take?? The bank wants our credit scores updated since them, since we want that late August closing date.. Anyone know how much of a hit it will be?""

Whats the cheapest car insurance YOU have ever paid?

Whats the cheapest car insurance YOU have ever paid?

Car insurance question.?

Okay, so if a car has no insurance is it legal to still drive it as long as I myself am insured?""

Why you would be better off buying a 20 year term life insurance policy at age 25......?

Why you would be better off buying a 20 year term life insurance policy at age 25 rather that buying a one-year renewable policy?

Selling insurance question?

What license/certification does one need to sell and distribute insurance such as home owners, auto, life insurance etc. in the state of Wisconsin. And what schooling if any would someone need to obtain these licenses and or certifications. My grandfather and a friend own a agency that affiliates with another independent agency that allows them access to a large variety of insurers, and they would like me to become apart of business.""

""What are my options, health insurance wise?""

I'm 19 and MassHealth is being a b**** and canceling my insurance. I got no job and I'm a full time student. Is there anyway to get insurance like this? I mean, Massachusetts must have something for people like me. Anyone else having this problem and have a solution? If so it would really help.""

How can I get a health insurance that I can afford?

I work full time and my husbant too but our jobs don't offer a health insurance. We hava just enough money to pay the mortgage, other bills and to survive the month. We would like to have a baby and the only thing that is holding us up is no insurance. I could only find family insurance that's over $500 a month and we could never afford that. And we make too much to qualify for help from the government. Does anyone know any affordable insurance or help from somewhere. Also, without $1000s in deductibles and coinsurance?""

How much would insurance cost on a 96 Chevrolet camaro?

Monthly? I spotted a camaro for the first time and it was completely gorgeous, I almost cried. it also runs good. The cost is pretty crazy for a camaro only 2,000. My mom said that I could not get it because the insurance is high I asked her how high and she said about 3,000 a month also I'm 16. I get the feeling she is wrong how much would you say insurance on a 96 camaro would cost?""

How does auto insurance work?

If you are in an accident and its not your fault ,who pays for your damages? Also what happens if you parents lend you there car but you werent on there insurance and now after the accident you are on the insurance. Can the insurance cover you now that you have been add to your parents insurance.""

""I am 18 and i just got my license nearly 2 months ago, what insurance would take me?

i need insurance now but the rates are so high.. i am a full time high school student and i live on my own its not like i could put the insurance under my parents name. i need help !!!!!

How much will my car insurance be?

Im getting my own can insurance when i turn 18 in about a month, my parents are kicking me off there's i have had 3 tickets and i drive a 1998 toyota camry...""

Which car insurance company is best with a teenage driver?

i am 16 and i am considering buying a 1999-2004 mustang or maybe a firebird or camaro from about the same time and i know the insurance is going to be high. 1) how much of a difference will it make if its listed as my parents' car and im just a driver rather than it being my car and 2) which auto insurance company is best for discounts from drivers ed, my gpa(4.0 thank you very much),and maybe a defense driving course or something like that. thanks in advance everyone!!!""

Are online car insurance quotes usually close to the actual cost?

Are online car insurance quotes usually close to the actual cost?

Does one speeding ticket affect your insurance rate ?

i got my first speeding ticket , i live in Utah , and i have state farm insurance so will it affect my rate ?""

What's the best life insurance company? why?

What's the best life insurance company? why?

Where should I get life insurance for my parents?

Hello, I would like to buy life insurance for my parents without them knowing about it because we're Asians and Asians are usually superstitious about this and considered this as a jinx. However, my parents are both a lot older now. My dad is 67 and my mom is 57. They are both pretty healthy as of now. We are not very well off and so I worry. I just want them well taken care off even after death. I really want to send my parents back to their homeland and have them buried over there. It's really sadden me to think about it because I love my parents a lot. With that being said, can I please get some guidance on what I need to do? Are there any good companies out there that I can work with? What's a good life insurance plan? Is it true that after a certain age, you are no longer eligible to buy life insurance? Any other additional advice and tips are appreciated. Thank you for all the help!""

Is there really any cheap health insurance I only bring home $280 a week and they want you to pay $260 or so.?

Is there really any cheap health insurance I only bring home $280 a week and they want you to pay $260 or so.?

Health insurance in Colorado?

I just moved to Colorado from California and am looking for a job. My problem is I have to get my vision tested, and I'm going to an optometrist, but I'm pretty sure he'll refer me to a specialist and testing will be required. I really want to go because I've been putting it off forever and it's starting to affect me a lot. I applied for Medicaid and was denied, obviously, since you have to have children or be over a certain age. Is there an insurance plan that's comprehensive and affordable, something that's going to cover doctor visits? I'm not looking for hit-by-a-bus insurance because that won't cover doctor visits or prescriptions. Or is there another public option? Thanks for your help!""

Is it legal to keep a check from my health insurance company that they expect me to pay the doctor with?

We are having a really difficult time financially. My husband gets a very large bonus in December and we will be back on track and then some. So here's my question. I recently ...show more

What is an average estimate for insurance on a 1991 convertible for a 19 year old male?

The car is not red and i'm talking just liability.

Will my insurance rise if the accident was not my fault?

i was involved in a minor car accident which took place at a drive thru and the car in front of me reversed his car, and at the speed he had applied to the gas pedal was enough impact to smash my entire hood in and damage my front bumper. I filed a claim with my insurance as soon as I got home. The following morning the insurance company of the OTHER driver contacted me and verified that he will take full responsibility therefore my repairments will be covered by his insurance. Ive been reading online relating to my question, but in my case, will my insurance rate go up? This is also my very first accident and I've been ensured for 1 year since I've been driving.""

Insurance on Giving Birth?

Me and my husband don't have any insurance and we want to have a baby, what is the average monthly payment for insurance that will cover everything from the ultra violet sound to the monthly check-ups to the auctual giving birth in the hospital.""

Would you switch car insurance companies after 10 years to save money?

Since 1997 I've been with the same car insurance company. Have had FANTASTIC service and support with claims and general questions. I use the same company for car insurance, home owner's insurance, life insurance, and to manage my IRA. When pricing out alternatives I realize that I could save about $50 a month by switching my car insurance to esurance. I attempted to get my current insurance to match their price without success. I'm very leery about possibly loosing my excellent service and support from my current company. Would you switch to a new company, and possibly a worse company, to save money?? I can easily afford my current company, but I'd obviously love having an extra $50 a month to plan with.""

Lowest car insurance in india?

which company giving lowest price for car insurance?

Will insurance pay if someone crashes into a salvaged car?

I was wondering what happens if someone crashes into a car with a salvage title. Will the other person's insurance pay the normal amount for it, or do they only offer a reduced amount because it is salvaged? This is obviously assuming the other driver is at fault.""

Touchet Washington Cheap car insurance quotes zip 99360

Touchet Washington Cheap car insurance quotes zip 99360

Do I need renters insurance?

I've had renters insurance for the past 2 years. The new place I'm at now is not under my name. But I do pay some of the rent to the the person I'm living with (whose name is on lease). Someone told me today that renters insurance is no good and doesn't cover anything if my name is not on the lease. Is this true?

Cheap Auto Insurance in FL?

I'm 19 years old and I got my license in Sept of 06 (almost a year) My insurance is REALLY HIGH! By myself I am looking at around 700 a month (my car is Fianced, 04 Mitsu lancer ES) so I am put under my 22 year old boyfriend insurance. With his 02 Audi A6 and my car, we are paying 495 a month. (South Florida) (Esurance is who we have) We have called Geico and Progressive adn State Farm and nothing is giving us a smaller quote. Does anyone know a good insurance company that is cheaper with students, new drivers, etc..? We also do not live in the same household, and some insurance agencys will not cover us for nothing living together. But anyways, just let me know if you know of a cheaper insurance agency. Thanks.""

Car insurance help please ?

Basically i have bought a car and i need to insure it as my dad as the main driver as he has 20+ years of no claim bonuses and it bring the insurance price down to a manageable payment for me.the problem is that its not with the same company that my dad is currently with and he doesn't have any recent renewal quotes so i don't have proof of his no claims bonus.how can i get proof and will i need the proof before i try to get the insurance ? im 18 and a first driver so i really need my dads ncb to be able to afford insurance

How much will car insurance be for my 146 year old mother?

How much will car insurance be for my 146 year old mother?

High insurance rates for old luxury cars?

I'm looking to buy my first car and have my eyes and this cheap old BMW (1997-2002 don't know the exact year). Would the insurance cost me more than it would for other car brands like Toyota or Honda from similar years?

How much does a HSG test cost?

My gyno wants me to get an HSG test done. I have PCOS and am trying to get pregnant. I live in Georgia and have Blue Cross Blue Shield insurance. I wanted to know how much it would cost and if i truely need to have this test done to get the perscription I need to become pregnant.

Are there health insurances for college students?

My company has been in a financial turmoil and in result, me plus others were cut. I have gone back to school in hopes I can get a better job. I recently read that after the first of the year, if you don't health insurance, then you will fined from your tax returns. Obviously, I don't have a job that offers insurance, and getting my own is so very expensive. Especially when I don't have an income. I've heard that there are insurances offered to students but I don't know where to look? Does anyone have any idea on how I can get affordable insurance?? Thanks in advance?""

How much does motorcycle insurance cost in kansas for a 16 year old driver?

im 15, about to turn 16 and want to get a motorcycle. i only have a few dirtbikes that aren't street legal and im thinking about getting a 1993 gsx750r this july for my bday. how much would i expect to pay for the insurance? i live in a rural area so it SHOULD cost less right?""

How much does insurance cost a month?

Okay, I'm 21 years old and I'm a full time college student I work part time and I live with my mother and step-father. I'm on my fathers insurance. My father is a Department of Transportation worker he has worked for the state for about 33 years. He has PEIA insurance. He called me today and was complaining cause he got a doctors bill for me for $35...he wanted to know why and I said idk maybe it was a mistake can you pay it since it's not that much...and then he goes into this whole thing how he pays my insurance every month...blah blah blah...but he doesnt realize that my mom and my step dad do everything else I mean they pay my other bills. He hasn't paid anything since I turned 18 except for insurance (he won't even take out a loan for my education...my mom and I do that). I pay my car insurance,gas, and cell phone bill out of my part time job check cause I commute to school. He has the nerve to call me and gripe over $35!!! WTF?!?! Does anyone know how much he pays a month or about how much he pays?""

I think I've made a mistake on my car insurance?

Long story short my Dad has a car that is insured and has been for a while. He has never made a claim in his 40+ years of driving. He's just bought another car that we can both drive (I can't drive his automatic until I pass my test) He was going to insure it with the same company as his other car however they won't let me be a named driver as I'm under 18 so we've found another company to go with. We got a quote and paid the money. No problem. Awaiting conformation in the post. Earlier today, however, I was talking to a friend who is insured with the same company and he says my dads no claims doesn't count because he's still insured with another company. Therefore by putting 9+ years on the form we've lied ?! Is this correct? Does this make our insurance invalid? How much trouble could we get in for this mistake? How can we resolve this?""

Can you get life insurance if your already sick?

I have life insurance, and my children have the gerber grow up plan, but my husband doesn't have any and now he's sick. He's 21 - in case his age matters - he was tested for lymphoblastic leukemia last night - but no results yet. Probably because it's Saturday. If he ends up having this, can he still be approved by life insurance?""

How much do you pay for your car insurance?

Toronto, ON""

Auto Insurance policy changes?

Would a auto insurance company be able to tell if you changed your deductibles after a wreck or comprehensive damage? If you changed it and then waited a couple of days or a week from say, 1000 to 500$ and then filed the claim. Do they check for recent changes in policy coverages?""

Cheapest car insurance?

What would be the cheapest car insurance for a low income 18 year old female who has had two tickets. I have a Chevy Tahoe-2006 and I live in Oklahoma if that helps.

Are all sportsbikes expensive on insurance?

im wanting to get either a 2007 kawasaki zx6r or honda cbr250r. im 18 but i plan on getting one at 19 or 20 and it will only be on insurance during the summers. so do you know if those are expensive on insurance? would it be less than a car like a honda or toyota?

Car insurance for an 18 year old?

When I turn 18 I'll most likely be getting a car. I'm living in NJ and just want to know how high the insurance would be. Also, would previous driving experience help? Like I drive a moped, I don't think it would do much, but would the insurance go down, even a dollar? I'd just like to know.""

Question on car insurance?

i have progressive and i was wondering if i would be able to swtich my insurance from one car to a different one. my current car got its sub frame pretty bent up and theres no fixing it. so im looking for a diff car. so when i do get my other car. will i be able to switch my insurance over to the new one?

Cheapest Car Insurance For Ford Taurus 2003 SES ?

I want basically minimum, + if somebody hits me uninsured, Do you think thats good coverage? Car is only worth 2700 thats what i paid to buy it with 130000 miles on it. im looking for personal recommendations, cheapest possible, lowest down payment, and thank you""

Question about car insurance?

if someone gets a car and payes it to the owner in monthly rates, and he gets a insurance for that car. but th car is not signed over to you yet, so legally it is not yours yet. and before you make the first payment you get in an accident. you pay the car off with the insurance money, but the insurance gives you more money than the owner wanted for it, who gets the rest of that money????? you?""

How much should a Insurance CSR make?

I live in a little town in California, I have been working for well established Insurance agency since May 2012. I just recently got licensed so now I carry my P and C license. I am getting 12 an hour plus health insurance, am I being under paid? Im not getting commission even though I have brought new business in and have written policies. Your answers are very much appreciated. Thank you.""

How much is AAA insurance?

I'm 17 I live in California. I have a license already I drive when my parent's are in it. But I need the car for school. I was wondering how much does it cost to be added into my parent's insurance to be listed as an authorized driver?

Car insurance on a used car?

I am going to buy a used car from someone, and obviously I need to be insured to drive it home. Is there a way I can get insured for just that day or drive home, so that I can have the car before I do everything I need to with it?""

How do I get health insurance for my newborn?

I am 6 months pregnant and 21 years old. I am still on my parents' health insurance, as I am an unemployed student. My boyfriend, who is an independent, is an unemployed student as well. He is currently uninsured and, as we have found, is uninsurable due to the fact that I am pregnant. My parents' health insurance WILL NOT cover grandchildren (dependents of dependents) and so my baby will not be covered on their plan. Individual health insurance plans will not cover my infant until up to 30 days AFTER he is born (and we can apply for medical insurance for him). How do I secure health care coverage for him BEFORE he comes so he can start going to the pediatrician immediately?""

Who has best price on motorcylcle insurance?

I have a harley davidson ultra - its 800 yearly - my cars cost less. I am with geico

How much will my insurance go up with 4 speeding tickets in 1 and 1/2 years?

I just received my fourth and fifth speeding tickets in the past year and a half. Yes, I know that is completely ridiculous. I am still covered with my parents auto insurance and while my license is not suspended, my parents will not allow me to drive anymore if they find out about them. I attended traffic school for 1/5 citations, so it should not show up to my insurance company. Does anybody happen to know how much my insurance rates will increase with these last two tickets, or if they will even still cover me? Thanks!""

Touchet Washington Cheap car insurance quotes zip 99360

Touchet Washington Cheap car insurance quotes zip 99360

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