#thank you again this was a nice little surprise!

[reignpage]

Basketball Captain!Toji

Detroit Pistons: reaching for the ball

Warnings: 18+ minors and ageless blogs dni, bts of a modern au!smau (part 2 of Toji's series), can be read as a standalone but makes most sense with the context, cursing, mentions of blood and violence, general stupidity at a party, just one long foreplay really, not proofread

You really shouldn’t be here. 

Not a party full stop, not trying to enact petty revenge against your shitty ex, and certainly not with Toji Fushiguro, captain of the basketball team, and resident fuckboy. 

He’s taken you by surprise at every given turn. You hadn’t expected him to ask for your number from his friend, you hadn’t expected him to reach out just to complain about his placement on the List of the hottest men on campus, and especially did not expect him to let you into the gym just because it was raining, though he did shrug off your incredulous look with a nonchalantly delivered jab. 

“Y’ were ruining my view with y’r ugly crying face.”

And somehow, you had let him convince you to use him to make your ex jealous, to show him what he was missing out on. 

Now you, the girl who never drank, never wore short skirts, never stayed out too late, followed every rule to the letter, is now sitting firmly on Toji’s lap, slotting in perfectly like a puzzle piece, at a frat party. 

It’s like you’ve somehow ended up in an alternate universe or woke up in someone else’s body. Maybe you’re in a dream. Except the searing brand of a heavy hand on your bare thigh is disproving any of those theories. 

“You enjoying yourself?” His voice is low and gruff, you feel it vibrate against your body, lulling you into a sense of comfort. The rough denim of his jeans is warming your skin, his solid chest keeps you grounded, and his thick arms have you all wrapped up, balanced securely and protected from the night air.

You nod, head buried in the crook of his neck. Once in a while you inhale his musky aftershave, relishing in that freshly showered scent he always had. “My sources say Gojo throws a party at least once a week.”

“Guy likes to party,” is all he says.

There have been flashes of his white hair around the large house, disappearing among the crowds and into different rooms. He had greeted you when you first walked into the garden to make your way to Toji with a beer in hand like your partner in crime had instructed you. 

Gojo was nice, very friendly, a little loud, but you knew that already. As the writer for the gossip column, you know every thing there was to know about everyone worth knowing. Which is ironic since you’re nobody and you knew none of these people personally. But the frat president knew you. He had greeted you like you were long time friends and pulled you into a tight hug.

“Hey, look who it is! My favourite person in the world.” He slung an arm over your shoulders and cheered with everyone else, seemingly oblivious to the heat rising on your face. “Thanks again for putting me top of the List. Nice to know people have taste.”

And then Toji was grumbling and wrestling you out of the rowdy guy’s grip to a quieter part of the house. He told you to explore the place, get familiar, freshen up your makeup ‘or whatever else chicks need’, and to text him if you find your ex first. 

Now, here you are, making yourself comfortable on his thighs, goosebumps rising along your skin at the feel of his long fingers creeping up your leg and just teasing the hem of your ridiculously short skirt. 

Some people would come over, once in a while, to talk to Toji. They’d say hi to you but they were mostly interested in knowing how the captain feels about the upcoming games. A few girls would stumble over, giggling and twirling their hair but they leave pretty quickly once they see Toji’s eyes fixated on you. 

You have got to give him credit; he’s totally committed to the bit.

Perhaps a little too committed with how he’d frequently whisper right in your ear, warm breath trickling your neck. 

“You look damn good tonight, ma.”

The way he says it, the low groan that he teases you with, makes you press your thighs together. It’s a completely inappropriate reaction; you really should not be feeling tingly from his flirtations. He doesn’t mean them. Toji is just playing the part, trying to goad your ex into a fight so he can ‘ruin the vibe’ at Gojo’s party. 

Because, for whatever reason, Toji had beef with the man that seemed completely one-sided, if the hug the frat president tried to throw to the basketball captain was anything to go by. 

You stutter out a ‘thanks’ and ignore the heat rising to your cheeks. 

Toji huffs a laugh, tightening his hold on you before he leans back in the patio chair, taking you with him so you’re resting on him. Your skirt’s definitely ridden up your ass by now, but his large hand wraps around the flesh there like second nature. 

Despite the chill in the garden, you’re content in his arms. The man runs hot.

It’s easy to get lost in his body; the man is built like a Greek god, all muscle and strength, carved straight from marble. And it’s precisely because he’s so firm and hard beneath you, that you forget your ex is just a couple metres away, leaning against a brick wall with a red cup in hand, glaring at you two. 

���Dunno why Gojo let that guy into the frat when he’s so fucking ugly,” Toji grumbles. 

You laugh. 

Once upon a time, you thought you were lucky to be with him. That he was the catch and you were punching up; he certainly made you feel that way. Always reminding you that he could have any girl on campus, that the barista at your local coffee shop had given him her number with a smiley face, and that as a member of one of the most influential fraternities in the country, he could have any job he wanted. 

But as you throw a glance at him, you realise all of that was false bravado. A Napoleon Complex, most likely. 

And not once, since Toji picked you up, have you felt less than. He compliments you so frequently, so spontaneously, and so earnestly you can’t help but believe him. 

“Why do you hate Gojo, by the way?”

The captain glances down at you, a slow smirk emerging on his face and you gulp at the sight of that scar stretching. You want to know more about it, simply because you’re a journalist, it’s in your nature to be inquisitive, and definitely not because you want to trace the skin there whilst feeling his voice rumble through his body and into yours. 

With a shrug, he lifts his beer to his lips, and admits, “Don’t really hate the guy. Just wanna knock him down a peg or two.”

“I stalked Gojo for about two weeks just for a statement one time, y’know.” You stare at the people hooting and hollering over a table of beer pong, watching their jumping bodies, so light, so free like there isn’t a whole world of problems beyond the frat house’s territory. “When I finally cornered him after his lecture, he laughed and said I didn’t have to do all of that. I could have just texted him.”

Toji huffs an amused laugh. “That’s what’s annoying ‘bout the guy. He’s nice. Real fucking nice. But — and this is off the record, doll — guy’s got problems. And yet he’s always smiling. Just pisses me off, sometimes.”

And to that you just nod. You get it. There are some people out there who just seem to have it all, and you resent them for it, but they never hold it against you, and you resent them even more. 

“How did you become friends with him anyways?”

“Just kinda happened.”

If you have to hazard a guess, you’d probably say it happened through the fact that they all run in the same circle. Big personalities like him and Gojo and Sukuna, are hard to miss. They’re the kind of people want to be around. Everyone knows Sukuna and Toji have been roommates since first year, allocated on a random basis at first, and they hit it off instantly, opting to room together since then. 

With a sweep of the backyard, you enquire, “Where is Sukuna?”

“Somewhere, I’m sure. Guy doesn’t really like parties, actually.”

You gasp. “But my sources say he attends most of them.”

Toji places the bottle in your lap and you cradle it like it’s a treasure. He runs a hand through his hair and leans his head back with his eyes closed like he’s soaking up the moon’s rays. Earlier, you had told him you felt bad you were holding him back from enjoying his night, but he just patted your ass and said ‘it’s good to slow down, sometimes.’

“He does, but I think guy just likes to know all the drama. Likes to cause them too, the prick.”

You poke his chest. “Sounds like someone I know.”

He peeks at you with one eye, small grin on his lips.

“We’re a match made in heaven, doll.”

The conversation fades and you just rest your head on his chest, listening to the steady thumping of his heart and desperately trying to ignore the shiver that threatens to wrack up your spine with the graze of his thumb against that sliver of skin between your skirt and top. 

Toji’s holding you like he’s been holding you since the dawn of time. There’s no awkwardness, no uncomfortable shuffles to accommodate your weight, and he doesn’t even look the least bit bothered that sometimes people will point and whisper at the star basketball player and some nobody cuddling up in the corner on a swinging bench. 

You sense movement in the corner of your eye and spot a girl cozying up to your ex. He looks at you with a smug face. 

“How did you know my ex would care?”

You stifle a gasp from the sudden clench of his hand over your waist. It was forceful but gentle, invoking flashing images of him towering over you, wrangling you into position. He could easily bend you over and take what he wanted. Toji is big and muscular, yes, but he’s also an athlete. There’s no doubt in your mind that he has the stamina and endurance to go all night and not break a sweat. 

Shaking your head slightly, you bring the beer to your lips absentmindedly, taking a swig that leaves you blanching. How anyone could drink this, you’d never know. 

“No guy wouldn’t care that his ex moved on pretty quickly. Plus, insecure little shits like him need to think that they got the better end of the deal. He needs to know you’re all sad and stupid over him so he feels important.”

Wise words. 

It surprises you slightly. 

Of course, most students at Eden are smart — being one of the top universities in the world means having high standards. But no one would ever go to a frat-party attending jock for advice, much less dating advice, and expect insightful revelations. You feel guilty for underestimating Toji. He’s actually pretty smart. 

“Look, he’s got a girl on his arm and yet he keeps looking at you.”

It’s true. 

You can feel his leery gaze sweeping up and down your body, and it makes you want to throw up. So you shuffle closer to Toji, impossibly closer, and he lets you. 

“You look hot, doll. Just gotta own it, yeah?” His breath fans over you and it sets your skin ablaze. One hand rubs at your thigh, relishing in the soft, smooth skin and the other is gripping your hip. And beneath you, there’s something you’ve been giving your best shot constantly to pretend isn’t there. 

Toji Fushiguro is hard. 

And big, by the feel of it. 

You already knew that, of course. You get lots of anonymous tips through your ‘Insider’s Line’, as you like to call it, voicing in exhilarated pants about recent escapades. It’s a hotline anyone could call. You’re the only person who has access to the voicemails that get left behind. And it’s never usually a tedious process to sift through the prank calls and the boring confessions to get to the juicy details about the ongoings on campus. 

Many of those voicemails are to do with Toji. Whether that was about how he ‘so hot’ they could just ‘die or, like, combust’ or variations of ‘oh my god, that dick is fire, for real.’

You are not a prude. 

You have too much exposure to much more graphic descriptions of people’s adventures to be shy about sex, not to mention, you’re an adult. A virgin, but still an adult with friends who are not shy about their sex lives, to put it mildly. In fact, you’ve got a certain art student friend who loves to rant all the ways she’d like a certain vandal to ‘paint’ her with his ‘artistic essence.’

Whatever that means. 

And yet, despite all your pieces on the wildest, most inappropriate topics like ‘the hottest sex position right now’ and ‘is six inches really enough?’, you find yourself blushing at the realisation that the captain of the basketball team is sporting a boner that he doesn’t care to hide. 

You clear your throat and with a whisper, you say, “I hope I’m not making you…uncomfortable.”

You wince at the awkward wording. What are you? A child?

Toji grunts. 

“You referring to my boner, ma?” When you nod embarrassed, he taps your thigh with two fingers. “It’s your fault so you gonna lend a hand or what?”

If he was anyone else, literally anyone else, you’d be outraged. No man should talk to a lady like that and insinuate that they have a responsibility over someone else’s bodily reactions. It’s backwards and uncouth!

But…

Toji Fushiguro is not anyone else. 

You know he’s joking; he doesn’t seem to have any qualms in making stupid jokes with you because he knows you write filthier things. He’s tested your boundary many times in the past couple days and you’ve grown accustomed to his humour. 

And even if he isn’t joking, you have no problems with taking the opportunity. 

You shouldn’t.

You just got broken up with the other day and it’s unwise to get personally involved with a person you write so frequently about. Bias must not be tolerated is your mantra. 

Yet, your thighs are pressed tightly together, your nipples are poking through your top and you know he can see them, and if you were to slide a hand between your legs, you’d likely find wetness that is unbecoming of a lady. 

Wait. 

Among hundreds of voicemails, didn’t you receive one about how a guys likes girls sitting on his lap so he could feel their pussy?

Can Toji feel your pussy clenching, moistening and fluttering on his thigh?

You tilt your head up with a panic and you’re aghast. He’s already looking down at you with a challenging raise of his brow and a smirk playing on his lip. He knows what you’re thinking and he sees the question in your eyes. 

Toji flexes his thigh in an answer, pressing it harder against you, and the friction is delectable. It leaves you reeling, hand clutching his chest for stability. His arms tighten around you, and he’s sitting up, no longer lazily lounging, but now drawing closer, muscles tense despite his calm expression. Green eyes flicker up and down your face, settling on your lips with a hunger you surely match. You’re entranced. He smells clean and fresh with a hint of something burnt, a maturity you want to explore. His scent is filling your head, washing away the smell of cheap liquor and weed. 

Then, a foghorn like whoop pierces the mist. 

Some guy had climbed the balcony and is threatening to jump into the empty pool. Everyone crowds around, laughing and cheering. 

The moment is lost between you and your new friend, but he doesn’t let you up. In fact, he isn’t even looking at the idiot — not like you are, thinking about piece you could write about party culture — but rather at his stupid roommate, who stands on the other balcony, leaning against the railing as he looks on at everyone in disgust. 

Perhaps it’s the sheer fact that they’ve been friends for a while, and so he knows Sukuna’s inclination for inciting violence and general nonsensical behaviour for his own sick satisfaction, that makes Toji so damn sure this is his doing. Or maybe it’s the fact that he knows his roommate has developed a fascination with pushing a certain someone’s buttons. 

And when his phone pings and he receives a text from his pink-haired teammate, he knows it’s both. 

If the fucker stains Gojo’s pool with his blood, you think he’ll complain to the Prez?

Toji doesn’t bother answering, he just pockets his phone again with a tsk. He’s totally gonna hide the guy’s car keys in retaliation later for ruining his moment. He was so close to getting a taste of a certain gossip columnist and the opportunity was gone and excusing herself to go inside for a blanket. 

When she disappears from sight, weaving through the crowd still egging the loser on, the captain groans into the sky, squeezing his throbbing cock to adjust it. It’s gonna be a long night, he thinks, but then smiles to himself when he notices your dumbass ex still glaring with as much hate as the little guy can muster, and he knows he saw the whole thing. 

Now, all he can think about is you returning as quickly as possible so he can pick up where he left off. He’s gonna push all three of you as far as possible tonight: the ex will know he’ll never be man enough for a woman like you and that’s why he couldn’t get you wet; you’ll learn to let go, trust the pleasure and embrace it; and Toji?

Well, Toji’s gonna learn that the quietest girls are usually the ones with the most to say. 

[pinkofatom]

Phantasma's stage - Colin's change

Colin listened to the boasts of the hypnotist. His eyes lingered on her tight corset, those fishnet covered svelte legs. But he had to snort at her idiocy. As if she could make anyone act like a girl. All of this was obviously a scam. She had definitely some people placed in the audience to play along. That's why he raised his hand when she called for volunteers. She would never pick a guy like himself. A proud man.

But her emerald gaze locked with his. Glistening red lips curled up. "Oh yes," she cooed, "you will do nicely." With an outstretched gloved finger she beckoned him on stage.

He followed. Her perfume invaded his senses as he climbed on the stage. Something flowery and exotic.

She leaned in. Long lashes batted at his gaze and she whispered into his ears. Hot air caressed his skin. "Now, now," the words tickled down his spine, "don't be so nervous." She chuckled and Colin had goosebumps.

With her high-heeled boots clicking ominously, the great Phantasma walked back to the middle of the stage. "As you can see, my dear audience, our volunteer needs a little dose of calm." She ended the sentence with a little laugh. One echoed by the people. "And I shall grant him just that." Polite applause and louder cajoling interrupted her. "Thank you. Thank you. But we have not even started. Now, my dear volunteer, what is your name?" The question directed at him.

His throat was so parched. His lips stuck to his dried gums. "Uhhh..." he managed, "it's Colin."

Her high heels clicked again. The woman swayed her hips, the fishnets caught his eye as the fabric tensed. Her skirt seemed so very tight. "Colin, I am so delighted to have you as a visitor. Would you be a dear and tell me, why you chose to raise your hand. Don't worry, I won't hold any reason against you."

"I think this whole act is a sham," he replied, louder this time, and to his surprise the audience burst into laughter.

"Ohh, a sceptic." Phantasma's plump lips stretched into a mischievous smirk. "People like you, Colin, make my show really fun. Let me guess, dear. You think all those others were plants. Nothing I did was real. And then, when I challenged your masculinity you thought: ha I prove her wrong!" Her coy green orbs sparkled under the limelight. "How close am I, dear?" Her hand extended and she placed it on Colin's cheek.

Colin's skin prickled and heat shot up to the place she touched. "I am still convinced you're fake."

The crowd burst once more into laughter.

She grinned widely at his answer. Her gaze locked with Colin's again and she licked over those lush lips. "Well, well," her words were as soft as her touch had been. "Then let me disprove your scepticism, Colin. Let us begin." Out of her other hand fell a dangling crystal. "For you, my dear, I will go with the classics. Be a dear and look at the shining crystal." She waved her hand. Colin's eye followed the crystal and the sudden shine that emerged from it.

"Oh, very good. You follow it's movement even without prompt. That's part of the trick, my dear. People have such ingrained ideas in modern times. Knowledge of tropes and cliches, they can't help themselves. So when a hypnotist, like myself, dangles a crystal in front of your eyes. You simply follow it's swing. Back and forth. Left to right. It's absolutely normal. Nothing to worry about. Just enjoy the motion. The alluring shine. Back and forth." She lowered her voice, whispering close to Colin's ear.

A pleasant buzz began to form inside Colin's mind. "There you are Colin. Perfect. Don't be worried." Phantasma continued, "relax. Be calm. Take a deep breath in. Let the pendulum swing back. And exhale. The crystal moves forth. Inhale. And back. Exhale. And forth. In. Left. Out. Right. It's so easy to breathe in tune with the shining crystal. So easy. You don't need to think about it. You only act. Simple. Relaxing. Isn't it?" Her soft voice so close, it was as if her lips brushed over his ear.

"Yes," Colin mumbled. The buzz inside his mind grew with every breath, a warmth enveloped his head, a feeling like his brain had been reduced to a mass of soft dough. It wasn't unpleasant. "It feels good." His tongue was sluggish and he mumbled, the crystal twirled.

"Of course it does. Our modern lives are so filled with stress and hurry. But not here. Here calm and relaxation are the norm. The only thing you have to do is follow the crystal."

He hummed a content sound. As the crystal moved left and right, it seemed like the scenery around him was blurred, obscured. But the crystal — that shiny thing — stayed so sharp and distinct. It was hard for his doughy brain to describe the state of things. So his attention went to what was understandable, what was so crystal-clear: the pendulum.

"Very good, dear. Follow the shine. Gaze deeper into the twinkling light. It fills your mind. No more pesky thoughts. Let all those worries, drop." The last letter sounded like a loud pop. "Drop-" another pop "-drop deeper. Deeper and deeper. More relaxed with every swing. More of the shine inside your mind. Isn't this so delightful?" Again there was her voice in his right ear, like the touch of silk. "Your body, your mind, you are all in a state of deep and tranquil peace. It is the only place you wish to be."

His tongue felt like lead in his mouth, so heavy, as were his limbs. A small docile: "Yes," slipped through his lips. Slurred and mumbled.

"Very good, dear. All that's left is the shine, the motion. It has taken over your mind. It controls you, shapes you. And I control the swing, I shape its motion. So, I control you and shape your self. Can you feel how I control and shape you?" The words caressed him, wormed their way through his muddled head.

He had no control. All he could do was nod in affirmation of her control.

"Excellent, I command your body and mind with a mere gesture. I control your very existence, Colin." Phantasma's voice filled his brain. "And there is a simple truth, my dear. You aren't a man — not even a boy, dear. Oh, no. You are a simple girl. Say it."

The swing, her voice, the words; Colin's mouth had already begun to move before she uttered her command. "I'm a simple girl." His words came slurred and without a doubt. There was a certain feeling to the word girl, a pleasant fuzzy sensation that he hadn't expected.

"Good girl," the hypnotist whispered in Colin's ear, "you learn so well. Now, girls are naturally very calm, relaxed beings." She paused for a second and took the pendulum out of Colin's field of view, only the voice remained, that smooth guide to the world, "a woman does not worry or hurry, a lady always takes her sweet time to act. They are demure and elegant. This inner calm is reflected by their beauty. A woman always looks out for her beauty. She makes sure to always look pretty and elegant. No lady wears pants after all, no woman wears short or tight trousers that would hide their femininity. Skirts are what women prefer, long dresses that show the elegant shape of the legs, a sleek and feminine design. Such a female outfit shows the inner truth. Hair and face styled into perfection. Beautiful hair, long eyelashes, a plump pair of lips that have to shine in all colours possible, this is the standard a true girl has to hold to. This is the form of beauty you have to become." The crystal reappeared and swayed back and forth. "You have always been that girl, Colin. Can you feel it?"

His gaze locked onto the crystal and his eyes moved back and forth. He was completely lost inside that pendulum's shine, the voice of that wonderful lady. He nodded slowly. The words in her voice made so much sense. And as the ideas and suggestions entered his muddled head.

"Then," she led him to a vanity, "let her out." And pushed him gently into the seat. A large mirror covered most of the wall above the desk. In the reflection, Colin could make out his own dull face. That ordinary face of his had been staring back at him from mirrors forever. He stared in disgust. How ugly.

Phantasma leaned down to him and her breasts pushed against Colin's back. She laid her hand over Colin's and guided his arm towards a drawer, his hand grasped a handle and she pulled, opened the drawer, which was full with various make-up tools.

"Every good girl knows how to do proper make-up." Her breath brushed his left ear, her soft lips caressed his lobe, Colin's entire body shuddered at the intimate contact. He had no time to let the pleasure linger as Phantasma's skilled hand guided him through the tools. She snatched a delicate brush, its bristles tickled his fingers. "This will be your foundation, use a liberal amount, but remember less is more." Phantasma's soft fingers glided along his palm and he grasped it firmly, "your foundation is the base upon which the art of a girl comes alive." And so it was. She guided his hand with soft yet determined motions, he applied a rich layer onto his face, rubbing in the white and creamy substance.

Her next instruction was a different brush. "You need a bit of powder." Again she guided him and Colin pressed and dabbed and wiped, a tingling feeling remained after each application. A dusting of rose blush and some strokes with the highlighter, Phantasma seemed to know exactly what kind of shape his cheekbones needed; how to highlight their contours. Stroke after stroke his face changed. Mascara rolled over his eyelashes. Long curves made his eyes pop. A pinkish eyeshadow made their colour shine.

He grew enamoured of that person staring back in the mirror.

"A girl needs full, beautiful lips to show their smile to the world." And with this instruction Phantasma laid his fingers around a delicate red lipstick.

Under Phantasma's soft but skilled hands, Colin's lips became plump and red. Curled into a demure form they spoke of his elegance. Phantasma's final instruction involved his eyebrows and they were now shaped perfectly to his eyes and enhanced their colour. He was a beauty.

A soft moan came over his lips, a girly coo of delight, and his cheeks blushed red. The person staring back at him wasn't even male. The shape of the face was now clearly feminine.

"And until your hair has grown to perfection, this will complete you." Phantasma placed a wig over his scalp. Long pink locks cascaded down his neck. It fitted the face in the mirror like a dream.

"You are such a beauty now." The voice of Phantasma whispered into his ear.

"Yes." Colin nodded slowly. He couldn't take his gaze away from the gorgeous girl that looked at him from the other side of the looking-glass. A gentle sigh parted his red, plump and luscious lips.

"It feels so right — to be a girl, doesn't it, dear," the soft touch of the hypnotist ghosted along the side of his face. So gentle. Her gloved fingers sent tingling shudders all over his spine.

He leaned into her soft touch. "Yes," he said without thinking.

Phantasma leaned closer and her long lashes fluttered before his eyes, then her lips were suddenly upon his. So warm and wet. As the contact lasted longer and he couldn't help but reciprocate her movements, she pushed with her plump lips more and more.

He felt himself give way and open his mouth for her and as he gasped a little bit, Phantasma took the opportunity and her tongue darted inside his mouth and took a quick, yet passionate swipe around. Then, her lips separated from his and a thin, silvery string of drool hung between the both of them.

"Good girl." She took his hands. Practiced she twirled him in front of the audience. Glazed eyes watched over glazed eyes. "Now, I'm certain everyone will agree that my hypnosis is real." Phantasma clapped her hands. A jolt traveled through Colin and the people. Like a spell each person blinked awake. Colin shook his head.

"Look, Colin, what you are wearing now. Such masculine clothes. I thought a girl like yourself wouldn't wear them," Phantasma cooed into his ear, the people from the audience chuckled.

Colin looked down his body and felt suddenly very wrong, a blush spread on his face. "These clothes. I wouldn't," his tongue betrayed him and the muddled brain wouldn't allow for any protest.

"Then why are you wearing them, dear?" Phantasma smirked at the audience. Colin gulped. The people stared in anticipation at the two of them standing on stage.

"Because you hypnotized me," he mumbled. A blush crept on his face.

"No need to be embarrassed, dear. Others had fallen under my sway, isn't that right people!" The last part she addressed towards the audience. And they responded in affirmative shouts. Colin shook in anticipation, something tingling had started to creep along his spine. "So there's no need to worry." Her gaze locked with him and those beautiful green eyes glittered mischievously, her soft voice whispered. "Don't worry, dear, I've kept your elegant dress and may I be so bold, rather risque underwear safe."

Colin blinked at her, then his gaze went to the stage where the drawer lay, his clothes hung neatly next to the mirror. He hadn't noticed that. How could she have done all these things without him noticing, or even protesting. A tingle crept down his neck and spine.

"Now, don't you want to change again, dear? Those boy clothes I put you in must feel so wrong," the last word rolled from her lips with emphasis.

Colin shivered and his face contorted into a grimace. "Yes, yes, I can't stand being forced to wear such un-elegant, ugly things. They do nothing for my body. Hide my femininity." Colin grumbled, yet his voice appropriately soft and melodious. A pout pulled on his lips.

"That they do. Go my dear. I will entertain the masses while you are gone." She turned again to the audience. "Please, a roaring applause for Colin and her bravery to be put in such rough clothes," and Phantasma snickered as did the crowd.

Colin held her chin high. Her hips swayed more with every step, a feminine strut. And she left the stage filled with the a sense of adventure. Even if she still didn't like these inelegant style.

Who knows what could have happened? 💖

[chrissvalentine]

:: matt x brat!reader driving lessons

okay. you were really being annoying, yeah, you could admit that. you knew you were being unnecessarily cruel towards him. he’s just trying to help you. matt’s been sitting in the passenger seat, coaching you on how to do everything, when you accidentally get the clutch wrong yet again.

“fuck,” you huff, slamming your wrists down against the wheel in a dramatic fashion, a frown pulling your lips down into a pout.

matt’s eyes widen, and he has to resist the urge to roll his eyes. it isn’t the first time you’ve acted like this either — the entire time you’ve been driving together, you’ve been throwing attitude at him, even when he tries to help. you keep making the same mistakes, and he can’t help you get any better if you’re acting like a brat.

so, matt decides to fight fire with fire. it’s the only way.

“you know,” he starts, his voice thick, his tone a little deeper than usual. “you’re acting like a brat right now.” matt’s eyes rake over you for a moment, taking in your scowling expression, your furrowed brows, your flared nostrils. he just wants to smooth that frown away, but not when you’re giving him so much attitude.

you glare over at him, his voice pulling you out of your internal thoughts. “i’m not a brat,” you huff, gripping the steering wheel so tight your knuckles start to turn white. you keep your gaze forward, refusing to look at him directly — if you do, you know you’ll just start yelling at him for being right, for being too nice even though you keep snapping at him.

matt just raises his eyebrows, a laugh bubbling up from his chest. he’s amused by your response, by your childish behavior, but he also loves it. he loves the way it pisses him off, how you push his buttons.

“oh,” he teases, crossing his arms across his chest. “you’re not a brat?” the smirk that graces his lips makes you shiver, but your irritation overrides it. he’s enjoying this.

“no,” your grit out through clenched teeth, rolling your shoulders. you can feel his gaze on you, scanning over your body.

matt just lets out a scoff at your defiant response, his patience wearing thin with every minute that you spend giving him attitude.

he sits and thinks for a moment, looking at your body language, your pouty lips, your clenched fists, and a smirk pulls at his lips. he’s got an idea.

“c’mere.” his voice cuts through the tense silence in the car, making you shoot a glare in his direction. but you notice the look in his eyes, and you’re curious. so you do as he says, unbuckling your seatbelt and swiveling around to face him in your seat. he just cocks an eyebrow, a smirk laying across his lips.

“sit on my lap,”

your eyes widen a little in disbelief, but your cheeks flush at the same time. you’re so surprised that you can’t even protest. before you know it, you’re clambering out of your seat and sliding into his lap. you’re so close you can feel his body heat through his clothes, his scent making your head spin just a little.

“there,” he hums, wrapping his arms around your waist, keeping you in place.

you shiver as his arms wrap tightly around your waist, pulling you closer against his chest. you can hear his breathing, feel his chest rise and fall beneath you, and it makes you feel so small. you’re so close to him, and something about it makes you so submissive.

“you know, you need to learn some manners,” he growls, his mouth against your neck.

you feel so small sitting in his lap, completely engulfed by him, surrounded by his warmth and scent. fuck. you can’t think properly.

his voice rumbles through your chest, making you whimper, and you can tell that he knows the effect he’s having on you.

“you really should be thanking me for helping you,” he murmurs, his mouth against the crook of your neck.

you feel his lips brush your sensitive skin, his hot breath on your neck, and it makes you shiver. you can feel your heart pumping faster, your body responding to his touch. it’s so hard to focus with him so close to you, his hands wrapped around your body.

“instead, you’re giving me attitude,” he continues, his chin resting on your shoulder. “you’re being a brat.” matt’s tone is playful, but you can hear the slight edge underneath.

youre speechless. you can hardly think straight when he’s murmuring in your ear like this, his voice so deep and sultry. you feel so powerless, so vulnerable with him holding you like this, and you can’t help but lean into his touch, desperate for more.

he chuckles at your silence, his lips tracing the contour of your ear. “i should punish you,” he teases, his hands trailing up and down your sides.

his hands feel so big on your body, roaming over your curves. you feel so small and helpless in his lap, completely at his mercy. you can feel yourself panting slightly, your body responding to his touch, desperate for more.

his lips against your ear make you shiver, his voice so seductive. “you’d like that, wouldn’t you?” he whispers, his breath hot and heavy on your skin. “you want me to punish you, huh?”

you can’t help but squirm in his lap as his hands roam over your body. every touch makes you shiver, your body begging for more. you’re so desperate for him, his touch, his words, everything.

his voice in your ear makes you whimper, and his words sent a shudder down your spine. “y - yes,” you manage to whisper, your voice trembling with desire. “please.”

→ love, jess

🏷️: @breesturns @pixxiies @submattenthusiast @dominicfikeenthusiast @sophand4n4 @loveparqdise

[ssentimentals]

hii nini!! could i request vernon + soft prompt 24?

love your writing smm hope ur doing well!! (´▽`ʃ♡ƪ)

hi baby!! aw, thank you so much, hope you're doing well too! thank you for requesting! 💜 hopefully you will like it!

fluff prompt: 'you have a beautiful soul.'

you're not a stranger to the compliments. people comment on your physical appearance more often than not and while you obviously find it flattering and nice, you cannot help to find these words shallow and meaningless. when you put your effort into the work with your whole heart and then don't hear a word about your skills but instead get 'and you are so pretty!' is... discouraging. you wish someone mentioned something, anything else - about your work ethic, how hard working you are, how sincere you're in your approach to all of the animals in the shelter-

'your pretty face is really doing wonders to this shelter, by the way. i think a lot of people stop by just to look at you.' jaehyun, main owner, says. he's smiling like he just told the best joke ever.

you know that he means well, but your smile is still forced and you only nod at him, not offering anything else as he bids you and vernon goodbye. with your head down and full focus on a new puppy, you miss vernon's worried gaze and how he looks thoughtful, staring at the way you gingerly wash puppy's ears.

'he didn't mean to downplay your work here,' he eventually says, surprising you. vernon is not very talkative and mostly you two work in relative silence. 'jaehyun, i mean. he didn't mean it like you think.'

'no, i know.' you smile and it's forced again. you quickly glance up, meeting his gaze before instantly looking back down. 'i get it.'

vernon stares at you for some more moments before blurting out: 'i think you have a beautiful soul.' you face must show how shocked you are, because he blushes a little and shrugs like what he said haven't just pulled the ground from your feet. 'i- sorry. it's not like you were interested in my opinion.'

your heart is at your throat as you stare up at him, mouth agape. 'you- really?'

vernon looks up at you, slightly confused. 'yes? i mean yeah, yes.' and then after some hesitation he asks: 'you don't think so?'

you don't know what to think. you, in fact, are few seconds away from bursting into tears and that is embarrassing. 'thank you,' you manage to whimper before tears come falling. 'it means a lot.'

vernon's expression softens and he silently hands you pack of tissues, looking at you as if you're the most fragile thing that should be treated with all the delicacy. you sniff and he pretends to be engrossed at his work, carefully taking puppy from your lap. 'take your time,' he says gently, smiling at you and pointing towards the toilets. 'it's all okay.'

vernon is not judging you for this stupid outburst and nor does he find it embarrassing. if anything, he wants to reassure you even more, tell you how wonderful he thinks you are, but one step at a time, he guesses. one step at a time.

a/n: request your own here! <3 - nini

[amuseoffyre]

Fyre's Convention Adventures - Day 3 - A Great and Terrible Acte of Piracie 😁

A bonus surprise on the last day was that we got gifted a cast photograph and there was a second session of autographs for the people who had missed them on Saturday, but also for everyone else to get a second round :)

Since we’d come out of the last panels, I was piled high with my muppety crew and figured it would be a nice last chance to let the squad see them. Honestly, no ulterior motives going in, which made all that came next all the more delightful :D

Nathan was the first table and could see how many of the squad I was juggling and said it was fantastic that I’d brought them down for the con itself because “they’ve brought everyone so much joy”.

Rhys had a little giggle at the next table when he saw me coming with a pal bearing Calypso because between the photo, the sack of mups, the general goodie bag and everything else, I was quite the pack mule.

Con, Vico and Kristian, however, had been so very excited about the muppets at the fanmeet and photo session that I figured I would have each of theirs out when I got to their tables and then, alas, I was assailed by marauding pirates and came home empty handed XD

Me, with Izzy muppet on my arm: by the way, I was wondering if you’d like me to ship him to you, since you’re off to the US tomorrow Con: o.0 Con: wait, you were serious about giving him to me? Me: I mean, if you want him– Con: *wheechs Izzy right off my hand and into his arms, cradling him like a baby* Con: Everyone go home, this is all I’ll be doing now Me: 😂 That’ll be a yes then XD Con: :D :D :D

He leaned over to show his handler Izzy’s poseable hands, which were arranged to flip the bird and solemnly told him “That’s my favourite bit”. After my hype-man told him I was undercharging for commissions, he told me “yeah, charge more for your commissions” and I can’t not now, can I?

Needless to say I was a bit giggly and vibrating in place after that, because technically, I didn’t give anyone anything (first rule of the con – don’t give guests things directly) and by the time I got to Vico, I hadn’t been given a smack on the nose with a rolled-up newspaper for breaking the rules.

They were so giddy to see Jim muppet again.

Me: I was serious about you having them if you want them Vico: O.O Vico, to their handler: … can I… do that? Vico’s handler: *shrugs a bit* Me: If I just… lay it on this table, it would be very bad if something happened or someone… took it. So bad. Vico, giggling like a fiend: *bats Jim off the table and down beside their chair* OH NO. IT’S GONE Me: OH NOOOO. I HAVE BEEN ROBBED. SOMEONE HAS THIEVED ME. HOW SAD. Vico: Noooooo :D :D :D Me: *flips another of the Jim costumes over the table, down beside the mup* Vico: OMG IT CHANGES CLOTHES!?!?! :D :D :D :D

And, of course, Calypso, my grand lady. I made her especially for Kristian since most of my muppet designs have a very narrow neck and I wasn’t sure if he would be able to put his hand in it. Instead, I’d redesigned and rebuilt her from the base up, with a wider opening in the back of her head and making her free-standing as well. Top of head to bottom of her skirt, she’s around a metre compared to the rest who are about 50cm.

He gave her such a doting look when I got to him and hell, if I could be banditted by 2, why not make it a hat trick :D

Him: she’s so gorgeous Me, keeping an eye on his handler: I can’t technically… give her to you, but hypothetically, if someone stol– Kristian: *across the table with both arms and has her gone and out of sight beside him in a blink* :D Me: Oh nooo :D Kristian, catching my hands and squeezing them: Thank you *so* much for this :) Me: Absolutely my pleasure :)

Nothing like ending the weekend by being robbed by pirates :D

According to a pal who was stewarding, when they finished Con had Izzy whispering in his ear and then carried him out the room, level with his shoulder, and Kristian told Nathan off for almost standing on Calypso then made him carry her :D

I can’t express the sheer dizzying joy of experiencing their excitement and delight with my lil crew and how eagerly they tilted into to full silly play with them. I know the cast have been liking them on IG when I post them but this was another level and I am so utterly overwhelmed by it. Every so often, I think about it and have a happy little giggle about it all.

[ideas-4-stories]

Cross Guild Romance prompt: Luffy and the Strawhats are sailing when this sudden and severe storm catches them. In the chaos Chopper goes flying overboard with some debris before anyone can grab him. Luffy and the crew get blown the other way and can only despair and hang on. Come morning Chopper wakes up not in the middle of the ocean but in Cross Guild’s hospital tent with Buggy, Mihawk, and Crocodile looming over him. Chopper thinks he’s gonna be tossed in the dungeons. Instead Mihawk basically takes full charge of him, taking care of him and knowing how beloved the little reindeer is from Zoro’s stories. Buggy and Crocodile are actually nice to Chopper too and spend time with him while they actually try to contact the Thousand Sunny with no luck thanks to signal interfere with the den dens. Mihawk is strict but not unkind, teaching Chopper about herbs and gardening and even some sword play. Buggy includes Chopper in the circus acts since he dances so well, and even Crocodile shows him the baby fruitwanis. Chopper is much liked in Cross Guild and he actually plays unintentional matchmaker for Buggy, Mihawk, and Crocodile. When they manage to finally contact Luffy and inform the Strawhats that they have their beloved doctor safe and sound, they all plan an epic reunion for Chopper, culminating in Luffy and the crew showing up when Chopper is performing on stage with Buggy. It’s an epic reunion of hugs, tears, relief and a bit of reconciliation for Buggy and Crocodile with the straw hats while Mihawk and Zoro get to reunite too. Everyone loves Chopper!

Oh, The Gods Above And Beyond, CHOPPER!!! Poor dude, who knows how long it took him to wash up on the shores of Karai Bari and he did it unconsciously as well clutching onto something that's very buoyancy in the water… You know I'm gonna go with the idea that Chopper was fiahed out of the sea from a Buggy Pirates boat, whether they meant to fish him out or it was a surprise. They rushed to their great glorious chairman as he would know what to do with the reindeer.

I would say it would make more sense if Chopper was asleep for a couple days so the boat can get back to land and let the Cross Guild leaders wonder what they’re gonna do with the reindeer.

Again poor Chopper, waking up in enemy territory is not a great thing to wake up too. Only to be shocked when Mihawk starts to feed him and reassures him that they will make sure Chopper gets back to his crew because when the little reindeer doctor was still sleeping, the trio made the decision it would be a good thing to stay on Luffy’s good side.

Love that Mihawk is doing most of the caring for Chopper, while Crocodile and Buggy would be giving Chopper sweets without knowing that each other are doing it as well. Chopper will be getting double cotton candy and he won’t say anything because Mihawk would definitely stop that (it’s up to you if Mihawk learns about the double dose of candy or not)

Mihawk teaching him about herbs and gardening is so cute! I’m thinking that sometimes Chopper will list off how these herbs could be used to heal and Mihawk is nodded, saying that interesting and jotting it down in a notebook. I can see Chopper holding a very small wooden sword that Buggy got his woodcarvers to make for the little doctor! Chopper is a number one hit just like their chairman to Buggy’s followers. They are definitely cheering him on and cooing when Chopper swears at them. Crocodile taking Chopper with him when he comes to check on his fruitwanis. Chopper is telling him how they are feeling and the big man is happy that his fruitwanis are happy! (Also love that Chopper is playing matchmaker, love that for him!)

I love the ending, truly goanna be a flashy great reunion party!

[presleyslilbaby]

~Emotional Soup~

(60’s!Elvis X Reader)

Reader decides to make soup for dinner, which Elvis appreciates, but he’s not exactly thrilled at the table.

Y/n was moving around the kitchen like a busy little Bee, having decided to make a simple pot of vegetable soup for Elvis considering he’d mentioned something to her last night about craving some, as simple as it was. With him so busy with filming ‘Charro!’, she thought it wouldn’t hurt to surprise him with a nice hot bowl for when he comes back home. That got her thinking for a moment. Ever since she was a little Girl, she’d always dreamed of becoming a Housewife, caring for her future Husband with such love and affection, and now that the time had came- Well, it couldn’t have been any better. A smile graced Y/n’s lips, thinking fondly of the memories of how she would play pretend, and how she would insist to any Boy that approached her that she was simply ‘betrothed to another’. A soft laugh bubbled up from her throat, shaking her head at the thought. It was memories like those that made her feel content with her childhood. The good parts, anyways.

The sound of the front door opening and closing again drew Y/n out of her thoughts, peering out of the kitchen to steal a glance at Elvis. “Hey, Baby.” She greeted, too busy at the stove to come to him. “How was your day?” With a deep and heavy sigh, Elvis trudged through the house to her side, wrapping his arms around her waist from behind. “Tiring..” He muttered, resting his bearded chin against her shoulder. “Wanted to leave the set early, but something popped up. Some issue with the film or another. I dunno…I wasn’t exactly payin’ any attention, I just wanted to come home and see my pretty li’l Wife…” He explained further, nuzzling his face in the crook of her neck, tickling her. She giggles at the feeling, stirring the pot of soup. “I see. I’m sorry you’re so tired, Elvis. How much more filming do you need to do?” “Too much…” He grumbles, sighing again at the thought of filming more. “I like this movie, I really do. ‘S not like the others, but…I need a damn break…” “You’re definitely right about that.” Y/n nodded in agreement, turning off the stove.

“Why don’t you go sit at the table? I’ll bring dinner in a second.” She suggested, hearing him groan in response, not wanting to leave her side. “You wound me with such suggestions, Y/n.” He teases jokingly, pressing a sweet little kiss against her cheek before walking off. She giggles in response, grabbing her pot holders and gripping the handles of the pot before following after him. “Thought I’d surprise you with soup tonight.” “I see that.” Elvis smiles, helping her guide the pot over to the middle of the table. “Smells mighty good, Darlin’. Thank ya’ for makin’ this f’me.” He politely thanked her, pulling out the chair beside his own and easing her to sit down, pushing it back in before sitting down himself. “You’re welcome.” As soup was evenly distributed between the two of them and was ready to be eaten, Y/n goes to talk about the day she had. “So I-“ “Shit.” Elvis muttered beneath his breath as soup dripped in his beard, wiping it away with a napkin rather annoyedly. “Sorry, Baby. Yeah, I’m listenin’.” He apologises, motioning for her to continue as he tries again with his spoon. “Right. Anyways, so I was going through my old scrapbook and found-“ “Goddamn it!” He shouts out when even more soup than last time drips down from his spoon. “I fuckin’ hate this goddamn beard! It’s so damn scratchy, it looks wrong on me, and I can’t even eat goddamn soup without gettin’ pissed the fuck off!” Y/n watches on as Elvis furiously scrubbed the napkin against his chin, resting her hand on his bicep, squeezing supportively. “Hey, I know it bugs you, but you’ll be able to shave it off when you’re done filming.” She tries to calm him down.

“It more than just bugs me, Darlin’! It infuriates the piss outta me! I used to enjoy soup, but now it’s just- Just- Emotional!” He gripes. She couldn’t help but chortle at the way he’d talked about the soup like it was a scar on his emotional wellbeing, hiding her mouth behind her hand. He whips his head over to look at her, narrowing his eyes in an annoyed stare. “You laughin’ at me?” He hissed. Y/n shakes her head, trying her hardest not to laugh more than she already did. “N-No, no..! Not laughing at all..! It’s just-“ She was losing her control. “You made it sound like you’re scarred by soup-“ With no more control over her laughter anymore, she simply let it all out, grasping the edge of the table in poor attempts to ground herself. But of course, Elvis, being the way that he was, simply couldn’t stay mad at her. Rolling his eyes playfully, he chuckled a little. “What, you really think I’m gonna let a silly li’l bowl o’ soup make me cry like that? No way, no how, Missy. Now you better stop laughin’ or else your food’s gonna get cold.” But Y/n couldn’t really stop. She was too far gone in her own humour by now to really take a rest from laughing.

[forever-once-gone]

Day 8: Taehyung - He Brings You A Gift, and a Smaller One for Your Baby Too

Part of the Love, Amour, Aur Pyaar drabble series for February! (lol)

Word count: 1.2k

Content and Warnings: gn! reader, husband!Taehyung, married au, parents au, just a lot of sweetness, your baby is cute too, not much else I guess

Author's Note: Another one for today cause I'm feeling nice lol. Let me know if you'd like me to post more. I mean, even if you don't I probably still will eventually, just may take me another few months lol.

You expected to wake up to your baby crying or at the very least babbling in his crib. That is how it’d been for the last odd months. Constantly waking up to baby cries and noises, leading to either you or your husband to get up and tend to him while the other tried to get a couple more minutes of shut eye.

But this time was different. You woke up to quiet. Complete and utter silence.

It took you a few seconds for you to realize that this was not normal. Not frequent for the past few months for you to wake up to dead quiet. But then you considered the fact that your husband wasn’t in bed with you either, and though (with a glance at your nightside clock ) it was still relatively early in the morning, Tae had probably taken the little guy downstairs to let you sleep. Still, you rose up from your bed for a second to confirm the crib was empty before reassuring yourself that everything was fine.

You took a couple minutes to cuddle back into bed, enjoying the subtle sunshine peeking out of the curtains. But despite the kind gesture, you couldn’t rest knowing that Taehyung was dealing with your baby all by himself for who knows how long. You knew Tae would yell at you to stay in bed longer, to rest, but you just couldn’t.

So you quickly freshened up in the bathroom before making your way down the stairs. Faintly, underneath the sound of the stairs’ creaks, you could hear your husband humming to his baby. You could hear short moments when he’d sing words aloud before switching back to humming once again.

Only when you reached the bottom step did Taehyung seem to notice that you had woken up, because that’s when his head whipped around to look at you over the back of the couch. The two of them looked too cute together in their night clothes.

His look of surprise settled quickly into a fond smile, shifting to look at you better as you made your way behind the couch. When you stood over him, peering down at him and your baby did he speak. “Good morning, baby.”

You pressed a kiss to his forehead with a hand against the back of his head before bending over the couch to press a kiss to the baby’s head as well. Tae had to raise him up so you could reach him without too much strain. “Good morning, cuties,” you replied, as you straightened back out, before circling the couch to sit down beside the two of them.

“How long have you two been up?” you asked as you rested your head on Tae’s shoulder, poking at your baby as he babbled happily up at you.

“Not too long.” Taehyung cradled the baby even closer to his chest.

You hummed affirmation. “Thank you for letting me sleep in again.”

“Like you even need to thank me, baby.”

“No, but still.”

Taehyung just wrapped his arm around you, pulling the both of you closer to him. “Well then it was my pleasure. Right honey?” he asked the baby. “It was a pleasure to be with appa for the morning?”

Your baby crinkled his nose happily in response with a sweet little smile and gurgle.

“You loved it with appa, huh?” you continued just for the little guy to screech in happiness which made the both of you laugh quietly before all three of you settled back into quiet.

The three of you sat there for a few minutes, basking in the warmth of domesticity. Glad to be able to spend the wee hours of the morning with the people you loved the most. What a simple but full moment.

“So…” you began. “You gonna tell me why the baby’s car seat is out?”

Taehyung tensed up beside you for a second before relaxing once again. “No reason.”

“No reason?”

“Nope.”

“Hmm… okay. Let’s ask the babe.” You picked the baby up from Tae’s hands and held him up in front of your face. “Did appa do something he shouldn’t have? Did he make plans to take us out today even though he knows all I wanted to do today was still home?”

Your baby didn’t snitch on his father, instead he began to grab at your face, pulling on your nose and attempting to poke out your eyes. 

“Wow, such an appa’s boy you are!” you teased as you settled him into your lap. He was sat with his back against your bent legs. The baby only screeched in response, trying again to grab at your face.

“Yes he is,” Tae bragged with a large smile. “You are, aren’t you?” Tae began to poke at his tummy, making him laugh again.

“But seriously, baby, if you planned to go out today, I really can’t. I’m too tired and just want to stay home.”

Taehyung just kissed your temple in response. “I know, baby. I know.”

He unwrapped you from his arms before jumping up from the couch with newfound energy.

“Tae?” you questioned.

“I’ll be right back!” He answered unhelpfully.

You began to protest only to hear the garage door open and close before you could manage even one world.

You got up from your seat to go see what the commotion was all about with the baby still cradled in your arms.

“What is your appa up to today, honey?”

The baby again didn’t snitch on his father.

What a traitor.

“Tae?” you asked, opening the garage door only for Tae to already be standing right behind it making you jump.

He stood there in his fuzzy slippers and large nightclothes smiling at you just a bit too wide for such an early morning.

“Surprise!” He pulled his hands out from behind his back to reveal two bouquets of flowers. One large one with a mix of white lilies and tiny daisies, and an identical smaller one. “Flowers for my two most favourite people in the world!”

“Oh baby, I love them!” You grabbed both of the bouquets with one hand the best you could. “We’ll have to do a mini photoshoot of the baby with the bouquet, don’t you think?”

Tae’s eyes glimmered with excitement. “That’d be too cute!” He began to walk past you towards the stairs as he rambled about how he had the perfect outfit to match the flowers.

But with Tae out of the way, you noticed a box sitting pretty on the hood of the car in the garage.

“Tae? Are you forgetting something?”

He turned back at you with furrowed brows, before he noticed your head nod towards the open garage door. A lightbulb went off before he was racing back to you.

“Oh right! I got you those pains au chocolat that you love this morning too!” He rushed to grab the box from the garage before running back into the house again. Whispering mischievously to you as he passed, “still warm! Hope you’re hungry.”

You bumped the garage door closed after him, before following the sound of his plans for dressing up the baby after the two of you had your breakfast. All you could do was hold your baby and flowers close as you hobbled after your loving husband, thanking the universe for blessing you so.

Aren't they so cute?

[oya-oya-okay]

( ´･ω･) HIHI!! This is really random, considering I don’t even post much, but I opened my tumblr to notifications from you and was surprised to see you started to follow me!

₍𝄐⩌𝄐₎ and I notice it was because you noticed that strawpage drawing of orange azul was in fact from me…

Surprise! I didn’t think anyone would recognize my art??? IM SORRY, I WAS GENUINELY SO HAPPY YOU MADE IT YOUR PFP, BUT I DIDN’T THINK ANYONE WAS GOING TO FIND OUT THAT DRAWING WAS MINE, SO I WAS COOL WITH BEING ANONYMOUS! I MADE THAT DRAWING BECAUSE I ALWAYS PASS BY YOUR NICE ART ON MY FEED.

But now that the secrets out….

⸜( ˙˘˙)⸝ I’ll leave this little Shuu and orange Azul here!

Have a good day!!! [sorry for the super messy drawing and rushed here and there!]

DEAE I- IM- IMMM😭😭😭😭😭💥💥💥

IT REALLY WAS A CHARMING DRAWING!!🛐💝💘💖❤️💓 WHEN I SAW HIM, I IMMEDIATELY FELL IN LOVE!😍😭💕💕💕💕 I COULDN'T RESIST AND PUT IT ON PFP

HE'S VERY VERY CUTEEE🧡🧡🧡💗💗💗

(In fact, I've been admiring it for several days in a row-)

ACTUALLY, MY MUTUAL HELPED ME GET TO KNOW YOU🛐🛐🛐 BUT I FELT THAT YOUR STYLE REMINDED ME OF SOMEONE!!!🥺😭💕💝💓💞💘 I felt like I had seen it once and couldn't find out who it was!🤔🥰💕💕 THEN WHEN THEY TOLD ME, I IMMEDIATELY RECOGNIZED YOU💥💥 I HAVE ALREADY SEEN SOME OF YOUR DRAWINGS!!😭🙏💗💗💗💖💖💖 YOU'RE REALLY COOOLL!!🤩✨ YOUR DRAWINGS WITH DEUCE ARE REALLY GORGEOUS AND CUTE💕💕💕💗💗💗💞💞💞💓

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR DECIDING TO DRAW AZUL FOR ME💞💞💞💞 I'M REALLY HAPPY😭🙏💗💖💗💖 SOBBING 💘💘💘

AND AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHG

YOU DREW IT!!!💥💥 YOU DREW THIS FOR ME!!😭💝💗💖💝💖 MY GOD, MY GOD💓💓💓 THANK YOU VERY MUCH! TYSMMM!!😭😭😭😭💕💕💕💕💕 THEY LOOK WONDERFUL!💗💝💖 OH MYyyy THEY'RE SO CUTE AND SWEET😭😭😭😭 I'M CRYING💗💕💕💓 I REALLY ADORE IT!! I'M SO TOUCHED🥺😭💖💖💖💖 THANK YOU, DEARRRR!! YOU ARE TOO KIND TO ME, OMGGG😭💘💘💘💘💕💕💕💗💗💗

ORANGE AZUL!!😍🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡 AND THEIR AHOGES IN THE FORM OF HEARTS🧡💜 DID YOU REALLY SEE IT!??😭😭😭💘💞💘💖💕💗 it's so CUTE I CANT😭😭😭 THEY ARE SO ADORABLE

DEAR, THANK YOU VERY MUCH!!!💖💥💖💥💖 I HOPE THAT YOU WILL HAVE AN AMAZING DAY OR NIGHT🛐💗💗💗💗 BECAUSE MY DAY STARTED BEAUTIFULLY THANKS TO YOU!!🥺😭💕💕💘💘💘 THANK YOU VERY MUCH AGAIN!🥰🥰🥰

[littlemissmentallyunstable]

can i pretty pls request a fluffy nash oneshot 🙏🏻

one with banter somewhat similar to how he and libby talk 🙏🏻 (in the tiny moments we get of them 💔)

thank you so much for this request!! I know it was requested a while ago, so sorry it’s taken me this long. I gave it a go, but I don’t think I hit the nail right on the head with what you requested, sorry!!

title: comfort from a cowboy

pairing: nash hawthorne x reader

synopsis: you had a not-so-nice interview and nash comforts you

warnings:

a/n: for @kit4strophe 💖💖

taglist: @lovethornes @whatsamongus @wish-i-were-heather @inmyheaddd @never-enough-novels @fleuriosa @midiosaamor @sweetreveriee @emelia07 @f4iry-bell @zaraaaabear @thoughtdaughter3 @benny1989fredd @elysianwayy77 @maybxlle @sheisntyou @anintellectualintellectual @aleatorio1234 @adalia-jaycee @off-to-the-r4ces @lyra-kane @reminiscentreader @lyrakanefanatic @imaseabear @elizaa31 @loveinalocket @lanterns-and-daydreams @hermesenthusiast

My head rests against the hard wall behind me and I’ve been sat on the floor for so long my bum has gone numb. But I can’t be bothered to get up and move, I don’t have enough energy.

I replay the interview - or should I call it an interrogation - that had happened just a few hours earlier. It’s been on a sort of loop in my brain for a while now. The same blood boiling questions over and over and over. I never want to go through that again.

I hear my door open which is odd because when it’s shut usual no one bothers me, they know better than to. I don’t open my eyes immediately. I play a little game with myself, a silent game - ‘who is at the door’. Jameson? Unlikely. Grayson? Almost a definite no. Alisa? Don’t see it happening. Xander? A possibility. Nash? I doubted it. Avery? Wouldn’t be surprised. Oren? Only if there’s an emergency. Libby? Most likely.

I open my eyes and to my surprise my guess is annoyingly wrong. Usually I’m quite good at guessing games but I supposed today was an exception. Maybe it’s because there’s so much on my mind.

“What are you doing here?” I ask, scrunching up my nose at the sight of a certain texan cowboy motorcyclist.

“Careful,” he warns, the corners of his lips turning up in the slightest way, as he saunters in and sits down beside me, “you almost look happy to see me.”

“What are you doing here?” I repeat, not really in the mood for his games or anyone’s games for that matter.

“Sitting beside you,” he replies simply.

I narrow my eyes and shoot him a look, “don’t be cryptic.”

“You asked,” Nash shrugs, acting so laid back he was nearly horizontal.

“Why are you here?” I rephrase sharply, a tone he couldn’t ignore or twist or make light of.

“To make sure you’re alright,” he answers me earnestly, something in his deep hazel eyes that resembled concern.

“Well I’m fine, there we go,” I say shortly, “end of story, goodbye, the door is to your left.”

I close my eyes again and tilt my head back to rest on the wall, assuming he’d leave at my finalisation.

“I’m very aware of where the door is,” he drawls, “but that doesn’t mean I’m going to use it.”

I internally scream in frustration and then open my eyes to meet his.

“Look I’m not in the mood for socialising right now,” I explain, trying hard not to sound too angry and defensive otherwise me might keep prying.

Nash is understanding. If I told him this, maybe he’d understand a kindly leave me be.

“You don’t have to socialise with me,” he says calmly, the soothing quality of his voice making it almost impossible for me to be mad at him.

“Fine,” I snap, standing up and perching myself on the end of my bed.

I won’t socialise. He can sit there bored out of his mind for all I care, in fact I hope he does. I lay back on the bed my head hitting the mattress with a soft thud. I want to sleep and rid myself of being such a prisoner to my own thoughts but for some reason I can’t bring myself to. And I know that reason is called Nash Hawthorne.

“Say something,” I groan sitting up.

If we have the conversation he so clearly wants, then he would leave, then I could sleep. Simple.

“What?” he asks, eyebrows furrowed.

“Just say something,” I exasperate, “the silence is killing me.”

A small smirk plays on his lips, “what happened to no socialising?”

“Just shut up and stay something,” I nearly yell.

“That phrase is one confusing oxymoron,” he chuckles, shaking his head.

“You’re a moron,” I reply, snarkily.

He laughs at me. It was a real laugh, not a pity one. His eyes are lit up and the smile fills his face. It is a pretty laugh, I think that’s what annoys me the most. I liked it.

“Tell me something,” I press on, “anything.”

He pauses for a minute. And then another. And then another. Until the pause is so long I wonder if he’s going to talk at all. Slowly he makes his way beside me again and looks deep into my eyes like he can read them.

“You don’t like all this,” he begins, “you didn’t ask for it, you wish you could go back to your old life but feel selfish and guilty to wish that because people would die to be in your situation.”

I try not to betray my shock but I’m awful at hiding my thoughts and feelings. My face probably says it all. Part of me is angry. He shouldn’t know this. I shouldn’t be this easy to read. It’s not fair. The other part is touched that someone care this much.

I fold my arms protectively across my chest and raise my eyebrows, “and who are you to tell me that?”

“An observer,” he says, almost gently.

“Stop observing me,” I tell him, “I’m not a project.”

“Oh I would never dream of considering you a project,” he replies, his voice deep in the back of his throat.

I move in closer, pinning him with an accusing look, “then what do you consider me?”

“Hold your horses, darlin’, I’m asking the questions here,” Nash grins, something about the way the light sparkles in his eyes gets under my skin.

“Says who? And don’t call me darling,” I tell him bluntly.

“Says me,” he shrugs nonchalantly.

He doesn’t add a darlin’ on the end and part of me respects him for that. If I’d been talking to anyone else they probably would’ve tried to piss me off even more. But Nash isn’t like that, he never has been.

“Well I don’t care what you have to say,” I quip.

“I never asked you to care,” he replies, his voice reminding me of a waveless sea.

I glance at him and find his eyes are already on me, I exhale slowly and ask him one more time, “why are you here?”

“To make sure you’re okay,” he answers in an instant. No double meanings, no puzzles, no avoidance, just a straight answer. But it takes me by surprise just as much.

I try to cover my true feelings, “why wouldn’t I be okay?”

“I saw it,” Nash tells me softly, apology decadently laced through his eyes.

He was referring to the interview of course. I didn’t know he watched mine like I watched his.

“I told you not to watch,” I scowl.

“I’m not very good at listening,” he shrugs.

“Clearly,” I roll my eyes, playing with the fabric of my jumper sleeve to avoid looking at him.

“So are you okay?” he asks, again his voice stole that gentle tone that made my heart melt into mush.

“I’m fine,” I reply, keeping my tone cold and hard.

Of course I’m not fine. I am anything but fine. But saying you’re fine is so much easier than talking through the hard parts, the truth. And sometimes if you pretend it’s fine for long enough you can trick yourself into believing it too.

“I know what happened,” he reminds me with a tenderness that made my limbs ache to curl against his body.

“And I’m fine,” I say sharply, still in denial, still trying to be too stubborn for my own good.

“Well now you’ve told me twice it makes it all the more real,” he barks out a laugh.

I roll my eyes.

“Why do you care so much anyway,” I scoff.

“You’re important.”

The answer is lightning fast, almost like a reaction. It doesn’t have to be thought about, pondered or even considered. It’s just engraved into his brain as the thing that feels more natural, the most ‘right’ to reply with.

“What?”

“You’re important and I care that you’re okay,” he says.

I don’t know what mix of emotions hit my chest, I just know they hit with an impact that knocks all the air out of my lungs. He cares. I’m important to him. He wants to know I’m okay.

“What are you hiding under that cowboy hat?”

He almost chokes on his own spit in surprise. Then gain composure and leans back, raising an eyebrow, “you’re changing the subject?”

“Answer my question,” I demand, narrowing my eyes.

“What do you mean what am I hiding under my cowboy hat?” he muses with a sweet small smile.

“Well you have it on 24/7,” I explain, “so I presume you’re hiding something.”

“Just because something is covered up doesn’t mean it’s hiding something,” he says ,”and it goes both ways, just because something looks normal doesn’t mean it’s not hiding something.”

I have a feeling he’s not talking about cowboy hats anymore.

“I did what I had to do,” I reply.

“Stayed silent?” he asked.

“It was better,” I press on.

A flicker of rage flashes through his face, “people don’t get to talk to you like that.”

“I know,” I yell back.

“Then why did you let them,” he asks me, annoying not raising his voice to escalate the situation.

I fancy a good yelling match in this moment with all the anger built up inside of me, he can see that and he isn’t giving in. I can’t tell if I like him more for doing that or not.

“Not every battle is worth fighting,” I snap back, “you should know that better than anyone.”

“I do,” he replies, almost cautiously, “but some are.”

“If people see you’ll fight everything you throw at them they will use that against you,” I tell him, “if you act unbothered in the first place you can surprise them one day and fight back.”

“You’re a tactical thinker,” Nash comments.

“Who cares what I am?” I reply.

His voice softens with every feature of his face, “I care.”

And there it is again. That mix of emotions with impact just hurling towards my chest. I never know what to say, it steals all my words before I get to say them. So silence consumes us, as if we’re two eskimos dead in the snow, the frostbite gnawing at our frozen bodies.

“You don’t have to act tough in front of me darlin, I can see right through you,” he murmurs, so softly I wonder why I didn’t just melt on the spot.

“Don’t call me darling,” I snap, avoiding his eyes.

I’m worried if I look into them I’ll tell him everything. And I can’t risk pouring everything out, not when I’ve hidden it so well for this long.

“I’m here,” he says desperately.

I feel as his hand clasps around mine, giving it two squeezes. Reassurance. My heart pounds in my chest. I want to tell him, I want to be free of my problems, I want someone to help me. But I’d promised myself I wouldn’t.

“I know,” I pause for a long while and he lets me, “it’s just hard.”

My voice cracks at the last word. After being so steady for so long it was bound to happen at some point.

“I know,” he says delicately, “believe me, I know.”

I let one tear slip down my cheek but as it rolls down, for my dignity he pretends not to notice. Always a gentleman.!

“I hate people,” I whisper, “they really suck.”

It was all I could manage without completely breaking down.

“I hate people too,” he agrees. I let him put an arm around me and I hesitantly lean into his chest.

I make a strangled laughing sound, “we should start a club.”

He sighs and quietly asks, “do you want to leave this place?”

“No,” I hesitate slightly, “and yes, but I’m not going to.”

“Is that what you really want?” Nash asks earnestly, a kind look in his eyes that is rare to find in any human being.

“Yeah, for now,” I nod.

“Good,” he says, “I’m glad you’re staying.”

“You’d miss me if I was gone?” I look up to him and raise my eyebrows.

“Of course,” he replies, “you’re one of us, your family now.”

I smile, my cheeks warming up to tint a rosy colour. I sniff as I let him wipe my final tear away with the soft pad of him thumb. There’s a moment that we lock eyes and neither of us dare look away. We both are very still. It’s like time isn’t moving.

When his thumb finally leaves my cheek all I can think about is how I want his touch there again. It’s like I need it now. Like how a drug addict craves a needle in their arm. The absence of that feeling of his skin on mine is horrible.

“Besides who will I have to call me a moron if you go away,” he jokes, tilting his cowboy hat towards me.

“You are pure cheek Nash Hawthorne,” I poke my tongue out.

“I’ve heard that one before in many different contexts,” he smirks with a wink.

Who knew Nash Hawthorne looked so good when he winked?

I gape in shock, “who knew you could make crude jokes!?”

“I may be the eldest and most responsible but who do you think taught everything to Jamie?” he asks.

“I’d never thought of that before,” I reply.

He shrugs in a very Nash kind of way, “welcome to the inner workings of being a Hawthorne.”

“Should I be flattered to be so privy to such important information?” I grin batting my eyelashes at him.

He moves in, “that depends on how much you value it.”

Our faces are inches apart. I feel something in my chest. Aside from my heart racing, there’s a feeling deep within my heart. It’s warm and tingly and tender. It’s sweet but bitter at the same time, and yet I still crave it.

“Let’s make a deal,” he whispers, our noses so close they could be touching.

“Is this a Hawthorne kind of deal?” I question in a murmur.

“Well what other kind of deal would it be,” Nash says, pulling back a little disappointing me slightly.

Still, I raise an eyebrow and cock my head to the side telling him to continue

“You don’t put up your wall anymore and you talk to me about your problems,” he proposes.

“A deal has two sides Hawthorne,” I remind him.

“Indeed it does,” he nods, “so name your price.”

“You learn when to shut up,” I say.

“What?”

“When I say I’m not in the mood for socialising understand it and move on,” I reply.

I wouldn’t be having the conversation if he’d just left me alone to start with. Not that I’m complaining, this conversation is rapidly becoming my favourite yet, but he doesn’t need to know that.

“Deal.”

We take each others hands and with a firm shake the deal is bound.

“Starts today,” Nash adds, “now.”

“Perfect,” I smile mischievously, “then I think you should stop talking.”

“See I don’t think I-“

“Shhhh,” I shush him.

“But-“

“Shut up.”

“Mouth is shut!” he exclaims trying not to laugh.

“Forever?” I challenge.

“Can’t keep me quiet for that long darlin’,” he drawls.

“I can try,” I reply.

“You’re setting yourself up for failure,” he sing songs.

I put my finger on his lips and this time physically he can’t suppress him smile.

“How does failure taste?” I murmur.

“Like something you’ll enjoy,” he counters, talking against my fingertips. I can’t help but grin.

“Wanna get out of here for a bit, get some fresh air?” he asks me.

“Do I,” I sigh, dropping my hand from his mouth, relieved he finally asked

“Come on darlin’,” Nash says.

I don’t tell him not to call me darling. In fact it’s growing on me. He holds my hands, they’re warm against my cold palms and gently pulls me off of the bed.

“Where are we going?” I stand up, tilting my head to the side in question.

He flashes me a grin, “how do you feel about motorcycle rides?”

I did my research girl 🤭🤭 a little reread of tig never hurt anyone and the libby/nash content is too cute!! I feel like I didn’t really capture the right kind of banter because it was more sensitive so maybe I’ll do another one with more banter, so sorry about that xx hope you enjoyed anywaysss and thanks for your request

[starlost-mochi-x]

lonely st. series finale ✧ chapter x : a new dawn

pairing: hwang hyunjin x reader (y/n)

warnings: mentions of injuries, lil bit angsty, some romance (not saying who but it's a surprise!), sad jisung :(( he's the best, i can't be bothered to write any more warnings. also i have no clue how basketball works so any basketballer stays out there pls don't come for me

a/n: it's done! i cried writing this last chapter but the ending is worth it i swear. thank you so much for all of the love, it means the world, and i'm so glad to have written this series for all of you <3 please read this post before you open this chapter if you haven't already 💫

series masterlist | skz masterlist

Hyunjin leapt and shot a hoop for the umpteenth time; he glanced over at the closed double doors of the gym as the ball thudded against the ground.

The gym was quiet and dark; the lights were turned off, and Hyunjin could only see because of the moonlight that spilled into the room from the high windows, unobstructed by other buildings and illuminating the lines and boundaries of the court.

Retrieving the ball, he sat down in the middle of the court, glancing around the darkened gym. He wasn't supposed to be in there to begin with; it was eleven pm and he was supposed to be in bed, sleeping.

Yet again, he hadn't been able to.

Feeling so restless that even sleepy Jeongin began to become disturbed by his tossing and turning, he'd decided to take a walk and figured that it wouldn't have hurt to shoot a few hoops to try and tire himself out. The last game of the tournament was tomorrow; they'd be heading back to school early and competing there.

Hyunjin contemplated his performance so far; he'd done pretty well, and worked harder than he'd thought he could. Every game except one which was a draw, they'd won so far.

There was one match left and Hyunjin had no intention of breaking the winning streak. Not when he and his teammates had worked so inexplicably hard.

He touched the bandage on his wrist, deep in thought; the friction burn was healing, and the bruise was beginning to fade, little by little, but after five whole days, there had been no real improvement. His wrist still hurt when he moved it too far to the left and it ached dully when he flexed his forearm.

He'd been told to leave the bandage on so as to prevent infection; at first, he hadn't minded, but soon the addition of the wrap to his body had become nothing more than a constant nuisance, something he'd had to stop and adjust during games.

The nurse who had wrapped it to begin with had given him a sling, or brace of some sorts; it was sleek and black, wrapping up his forearm and securing at the base of his thumb. He didn't wear it during the night, but he smiled at the memory of when he'd shown it to his teammates.

"It looks like a spy glove," Jeongin had told him with a grin.

Hyunjin wasn't sure what that had meant, but at least it had made little foxy Innie smile. He flexed his fingers absentmindedly, realising that the younger member hadn't been as happy as he had been at the start of the tournament.

They were doing just fine in terms of the competition, but Hyunjin knew his team members well, and if the evidence of overwhelming, strained practices and sleepless nights was enough to go by, he could tell they all just wanted to go home.

He felt the exact same way; the last few days had stung more and more without Y/n. He'd told her everything that had happened as often as he could, whether it was over the phone or through text.

He found he liked calling her better; it was nice hearing her voice, especially when he put it on speaker and let her tone float around him. It was like she was sitting right beside him as he talked about everything that had happened.

Deciding to get up and head back to bed, he put the basketball back into the netted ball bins near the door and slipped out of the gym, pressing the large flat button to raise the hoop. It ascended into the ceiling with a soft whirring sound and Hyunjin slipped round the corridor, walking towards his dorm.

He checked the time; he'd been gone for about an hour and a half. Hopefully the other members were asleep by now, and if he was lucky, he would be able to dress down and slip into bed before anyone even stirred.

Checking round the corner for any potential adults or figures of authority, Hyunjin hurried silently down the hallway to his dorm. It wasn't like anyone was out this time of night, but he still felt wary, and he couldn't help but think what might happen if any of the coaches if they caught him sneaking around in the dead of night.

Quietly opening the door to his dorm room and flinching at the click of the lock, he slipped inside and shut it as quietly as possible. The room was dark; he froze for a second, trying to determine whether anyone was awake. Hearing nothings but soft breathing and the occasional shuffle from Jeongin's bunk, he tiptoed over the his corner of the room, toeing off his socks and gently placing them down next to his sneakers.

It was completely dark in the room; Hyunjin stretched a hand in front of his face and saw nothing. He squinted and tried to adjust his watering eyes to the pitch blackness of the room as he slipped off his hoodie, then his shirt.

It was freezing cold; the dorms usually became cold by night, therefore they'd been supplied with extra bedsheets and blankets, and been told to dress warm for the night, but Hyunjin quite liked not having layers on when he slept. He liked the feeling of the coolness against his skin; it seeped through his skin and made him feel light, airy, and clean.

It was especially welcome as the sweat cooled and evaporated off of his skin; it meant he didn't have to freshen up. Now standing in nothing but his usual shorts, he felt his way to his bottom bunk, clumsily settling into the sheets and turning to face the wall.

He jolted and let out a muffled yelp as someone rolled over and slung a warm arm around his middle. Recognising the size and build of it almost instantly, he let out a shaky breath.

"Shit, Felix," he whispered. "You scared me."

From behind him, Felix smirked so hard Hyunjin could almost hear it in the dimness of the room. "Sorry."

"Why are you in my bed and not yours, sleepy chicken?"

Felix tugged him closer, nuzzling his face into Hyunjin's nape and whispering into the skin. "I got cold and Innie told me to leave him alone. Jisung's dead to the world and he tends to unknowingly thwack me if I sleep next to him, so I came to your bunk. Surprise, you weren't there."

Hyunjin let out a soft scoff. "My bad."

"It is your bad," Felix agreed. "Out talking to Y/n again?"

Hyunjin stiffened slightly and lightly pinched Felix's hand, resting on his hip. "No. I couldn't sleep, so I went to shoot a couple hoops."

Felix hissed. "You could have gotten in so much trouble."

His friend let out a soft, exasperated noise. "I can't help it. Besides, I've had a lot to think about."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

Felix's voice was soft and thoughtful, though a little teasing. "Like what?"

"The winning streak our team has. My forearm injury. Y/n. You. The mess with Jisung. Also, my hair's growing longer and I don't know how to cut it myself." Hyunjin blew a strand of it out of his eyes as if to demonstrate his point.

Felix chuckle softly, murmuring. "Maybe you should ask Y/n to cut it for you when you get back."

Hyunjin was silent for a moment. "I really miss her, Lix."

"I know. I miss her too."

Hyunjin turned and shuffled, facing his friend. Felix tangled their legs together for warmth, shivering. Noticing his discomfort, Hyunjin pulled him gently closer and brushed a strand of hair out of his eyes, his voice becoming even softer than before.

"Do you think she really might like me?"

Felix nodded softly, the quiet brushing sound of his head against the pillow being Hyunjin's only confirmation. Quickly getting up to reach for his phone, which he'd thrown on the floor (Hyunjin swore he would never treat his own device like that) he settled back into his friend's bed and opened to his homescreen.

The sudden brightness made both boys hiss and Hyunjin let out a muffle groan. Felix, however, was undeterred, and navigated with watering eyes to his messages, where he opened up the chat he had with Y/n.

Turning his phone to Hyunjin, Felix pointed to several messages from her that had been sent not long ago.

"She sent these to me after I called her to check something back at home," he whispered. "It was really late, and she was crying."

Hyunjin's eyes widened as he realised the date. It was the almost exact same time and the same date from when she'd told him to look in his bag. Where he'd found the bandaids, and the little note she'd left for him inside the innermost pocket.

The exact same date, where she'd texted Felix crying, and the exact same date where Hyunjin had sat in the middle of the lamplit dorm, tears streaking down his cheeks as he'd cried to himself.

He cried because he had missed her, he wanted to see her, and he couldn't help the tidal wave of emotions that had surged over him after Y/n had ended the call; overwhelm, tiredness, longing, sadness. On top of all of that, she was just really sweet and the sentimentality of the gesture had brought tears to his eyes. Jisung had always joked about how soft he was for affectionate gestures, and Hyunjin was grudgingly beginning to see how he had a point.

He took Felix's phone and read through the messages from after the phone call with her had ended.

*call with 'y/nnie ⛓️' ended. call duration 00:01:43* lix 🌻: he'll be back soon, y/nnie. don't worry! y/nnie ⛓️: is he doing okay? lix 🌻: he's good i think lix 🌻: he was kinda upset a couple days ago because of all the pressure that's been heaped on him lix 🌻: and he's been a little tense y/nnie ⛓️: i could tell after we talked on the phone y/nnie ⛓️: he sounded really tired too lix 🌻: if his voice is anything to go by, you sound exhausted lix 🌻: but please don't cry y/nnie ⛓️: i'm sorry for calling you and disturbing you from whatever you were doing, lix lix 🌻: nonono don't be sorry!! i understand lix 🌻: i think he misses you too lix 🌻: ...but you already know that

Hyunjin turned the phone towards the real Felix laying beside him and glared at him pointedly.

"You gonna keep exposing me like this?" He whispered.

Felix whispered back accusingly. "I didn't say anything exposing to her. You literally told her you missed her."

"Oh, right. My bad."

Felix scoffed and it turned into a quiet laugh, muffled by Hyunjin's large hand over his mouth.

"Don't wake the others," he huffed out, though a smile teased the corners of his mouth.

His friend nodded, both of them bathed in the bright blue glow of Felix's phone screen, which was still held aloft between them in Hyunjin's hands.

"I really do miss her, Lix."

His friend's voice was soft. "I know. Are you planning to tell her, though? How you feel?"

Hyunjin sighed. "I want to, but I just don't know."

Felix propped himself up on his elbows and began stroking Hyunjin's hair out of his face. "If you don't tell her, she might go a long time without having you by her side. In that way."

"But I'd rather have her friendship than nothing at all," Hyunjin glanced at him desperately.

"Well, we're heading back tomorrow, for the final game, so maybe you can tell her then."

Hyunjin sighed and settled down further into the sheets, feeling heat radiating off of Felix's body. "Maybe."

From the other side of the room, Jisung, who had been silently listening from his bunk, closed his eyes, and slept.

Hyunjin sighed and pushed the ball bins back into the gym's storage cupboard. The boys' teams had spent the entire morning helping to clean and pack up the courts for the end of the tournament, and though it had initially sounded like an easy task, it turned out to be quite the opposite.

Hyunjin was sweating by the time he'd packed up his assigned area; he'd been told to check all of the storage cupboards and count the balls, before scouring the courts for any strays left over. He'd been running back and forth through the gyms all morning.

Wiping his forehead with a sweaty hand, he wondered where all of the others had gone. Each member had been given a set of different tasks, and though they had initially planned to leave for the school campus early in the morning, the date had been changed so that they were leaving later that afternoon.

Hyunjin didn't mind; he'd grown quite accustomed to the polished courts and the dorms where he'd spent so much time. He sat down in the middle of the court and leaned back on his hands. His wrist was almost healed; there was still a noticeable burn mark, and the inside of his forearm was painted in shades of fading purple and green.

He chuckled as a shout snapped him out of his thoughts; Jeongin had been sent to the gym next door to organize the basketball gear, and Hyunjin thought he heard a faint thudding, most likely the basketballs he'd spent all morning collecting tumbling out of the bins and onto the courts.

"Shit, Innie," he groaned aloud to himself. "That took me all morning."

Getting up, he stretched his hands far above his head, letting out another groan, and decided to go check on his younger member to see what kind of chaos he'd managed to cause this time.

Stepping out of the double doors and wincing at the sunlight that just so happened to be shining in his face, he shielded his eyes with a hand and began walking through the pathway that led to where Jeongin was. He passed another gym and paused as he heard a familiar laugh from inside.

Curiosity, or perhaps nosiness getting the best of him, he peeked into the gym, noticing two figures sprawled out on the polished wooden floors. Checking left and right, and then cautiously poking his head into the gym, he looked around, trying to find something he could hide behind.

Noticing a storage cupboard to the right, which had been left ajar, he braced himself and dropped to his hands and knees, glancing across to make sure he wasn't seen. He took off his sneakers too; the last thing he wanted was for Felix and his little girlfriend to hear him squeaking his way across the court.

He hoped the storage cupboard was empty; a quick glance around showed him that it was. Satisfied with his hiding spot, he poked his head a little around the door to spy on his friend.

He felt a little bit bad; after all, they assumed they were alone; but he couldn't help it.

Besides, Hyunjin thought with a grudging grin, It's about time he gets a girl.

The girl in question, who Hyunjin had previously assumed to be a volleyballer, was leaning against one of the basketball bins at her back, legs stretched out in front of her. Felix was leaning on one hand, nodding along attentively to something she was saying. Hyunjin bit his lip to keep the smile from his face; it was honestly really cute.

He watched as Felix reached up a hand to run it through his hair, his eyes not leaving the girl's face. She didn't look away either as his hand came down, suspiciously close to her own. She made to fake-stretch and rested her hand closer to his friends.

He rolled his eyes. Get on with it already, man.

Felix apparently must have heard his telepathic message, because he inched his hand forward, just barely touching hers. Hyunjin's smile grew as he saw her hand inch forward too, til their fingers were loosely laced together against the polished floor of the court.

Even though Hyunjin was a short distance away, he could see Felix's cheeks heating up, taking on a soft pink hue matching the girl's ears. If he was being honest with himself, Hyunjin was halfway through wanting to clap and cheer and halfway through wanting to throw up, but he kept quiet and hidden nonetheless.

Felix adjusted himself so he was a little closer; his fingers moved to lightly run his thumb along the back of the girl's hand. He was smiling as sincerely as Hyunjin had ever seen it. Even brighter than the sun. Was that possible?

He was busy pondering that thought when his vision came back into focus, just in time to see Felix press his mouth to hers.

Hyunjin's jaw dropped and he knew he should look away, give his friend privacy, but he was so enamoured by the sight of his forever-bitchless friend finally getting some game that all he could do was stare with his mouth open.

Felix tilted his head a little and brought a hand up to gently run it along the side of her face; the girl's hands were clutching at his shoulders and she was beginning to lean back. Felix blindly reached beside her head, still kissing her, and pushed the ball bin that she was leaning on away, sending it rolling back a metre. He leaned forward just as the girl leaned back, propping herself up on the floor.

O-kay, time to stop watching them now-!

Hyunjin turned and covered his mouth as he leant against the wall of the storage cupboard, in disbelief. He'd just seen his friend kissing a girl.

Hyunjin now had two choices; stay until they had finished with the lovey-dovey notions, or risk being seen as he left. He decided to stay in the storage cupboard after a moment of strategic thinking. If the faint sounds of kissing and sighing were anything to go by, they wouldn't be done for a while.

Looking around the small, dark room while he waited, Hyunjin noticed another door hidden behind a small rack of tennis equipment to his left. Getting up as quietly as he could, he moved to the door and turned the handle, wondering whether it led to a smaller cupboard.

It didn't. It led out into the sunshine, and Hyunjin realised it was the back door to the gym. He sighed in relief and shut the door behind himself.

Deciding to actually go and find Jeongin, and see if he needed any help, Hyunjin set off towards the other gym opposite, peeking inside just in case he happened to walk in on anyone else.

Jisung and Jeongin were inside, much to Hyunjin's relief, and he walked to them, feeling a bit shaky on his legs. They were sitting in the middle of the court, playing some sort of game on Jisung's phone, and apparently finished with their tasks. Hyunjin sighed thankfully; at least their jobs were done. He'd already decided not to tell them anything for fear of upsetting Felix.

Jeongin looked up as he approached, smiling. It dropped as he tilted his head at the older boy in concern.

"Captain, why is your face so red?"

The bus ride back to the school campus was long and uneventful; the boys had started off chattering and laughing, throwing snack wrappers at each other, and teasing other endlessly, but had eventually fallen silent as the ride progressed. Hyunjin sat next to Jeongin this time, Felix having decided to sit with Jisung.

Looking through the gap in the seats, Hyunjin noticed Felix smiling at his phone, his cheeks still a bit red. His hair was a little disheveled too and Hyunjin smiled to himself as he turned and leant back against his seat, closing his eyes.

At least someone had the guts to confess.

He looked out the window, contemplatively intertwining his hands as his brow furrowed, wondering what he should do. He had followed through with his plan so far; he'd grown closer to Y/n through texts an calls, and he had a slight feeling that she might like him, but he still wasn't any closer to finding out whether Jisung harboured any sort of affection towards her or not.

Truthfully, he hadn't been talking to him much, only when they were on the court. Otherwise, they'd only been talking when absolutely necessary, and as Hyunjin reflected, he began to feel guilty for how much he'd been neglecting his friend. He wondered if Jisung had any idea about what was going on. Maybe he did, maybe he didn't.

He could only hope it was the latter.

He knew for sure that Jisung had caught onto his avoidant behaviour; he'd overheard him talking to Felix about how he felt like he'd done something wrong, or perhaps said something that might have upset Hyunjin, and as a result, made his captain avoid him.

He'd felt pretty bad after that; Hyunjin kicked himself for letting the negative feelings fester in his heart for so long. He should have just talked to him about it. But there was still a part of him that felt that Jisung liked Y/n too, and if he knew that he had competition, things could have turned nasty between them.

And yes, Hyunjin liked Jisung, and he was a close friend, but Hyunjin had finally found a potential other half in Y/n, and he wasn't sure what he was willing to put on the line if it meant being on the receiving end of her affection.

Was it worth losing Jisung for Y/n?

Hyunjin groaned softly and let his head fall against the window, the vibrating sensation of the bus's movement reverberating through his head, shaking up his thoughts. It was still sunny outside, and he closed his eyes, letting the sunshine filter through onto his skin, painting the insides of his eyelids in a coral sheen.

He jolted as Jeongin's head fell slowly on his shoulder; looking down, he realised the younger boy had fallen asleep. Brushing a strand of hair out of his eyes, he kissed his friend's head affectionately and he decided to attempt to fall asleep himself, trying to get comfortable in his seat.

Maybe some rest would clear his mind.

"Okay, so you two can play defence for the first half, because we've watched some of the other team's plays and they always go for the left side, so you two block them there. Innie, make sure you get in front of the other team's shooter, so we have a clear view of the net."

Jeongin nodded. "Okay."

Hyunjin stood and regarded each of his teammates in turn. They were prepared. For once, he felt focused, sharp, and fire ran through his veins as he took his position on the court, the center.

The final game.

The court was packed to the brim; the school had even hung several banners in the boys' team colours to encourage them. They could win a home game.

Students, teachers, and even the principal had come down to spectate the game, filling out the bleachers. Those who couldn't find somewhere to sit were happy enough to watch the game from the side of the court, provided they didn't distract any of the boys playing.

Hyunjin had previously felt rather nervous upon entering the court, seeing that everyone was there, but he'd told himself to focus, putting all thoughts out of his mind while he zoned in. The game was his only priority right now; everything could be dealt with after.

Including Y/n.

He hadn't seen her in the crowd; he hoped she was in there somewhere, spectating. He wanted her to be here, but he didn't have time to scan the bleachers and the crowd, instead deciding that the team should run through the tactics one more time. He'd enlisted Felix to tie his hair back; it hadn't worked the first time. His bangs were too short to be tied back, but too long and distracting to have in his face.

Grudgingly, he'd allowed Felix to loosely braid it, so that he had one of either side, his hair in a tiny little bun at his nape. It felt a little strange; it'd been so long since he had a haircut. He was used to having no hair against his neck, since he liked it short, but he found that he didn't mind the longer length either.

Also, Y/n had teasingly told him she liked the style on him when he'd sent her a picture of the group over text.

So he'd kept it.

Shaking his head, Hyunjin kept his eyes on the ball as the referee held it between them, poised to blow the whistle. There was gradual silence as the crowd settled down, waiting in anticipation to see who would get the upper hand first.

To no one's surprise, and to the enormous annoyance of the other team's center, Hyunjin's fingertips brushed the ball, sending it almost halfway down the court, where his teammate intercepted it and began dribbling towards the hoop.

Hyunjin landed lightly and quickly adjusted the black sleeve protecting his injury, before racing down the court.

Twenty minutes later and Hyunjin was beginning to become weary and exhausted; his coach called a timeout and went through a couple strategies, much to the team's relief. It'd been one of the toughest games so far, and as Hyunjin glanced up at the scoreboard, he realised they were currently at a tie.

He exhaled forcefully as the game started up again, moving to defend an opponent as Felix moved down the court with the ball. He noticed two of the other team's members moving towards Jisung as Felix passed the ball to him, and shouted out a warning.

One of the opponents budged Jisung hard with his shoulder, attempting to take the ball, and he spun, leaning over with the ball to his middle to stop them from taking it. Jisung looked up as the other opponent covered the closest team member; there was nowhere for him to pass. He glanced up at the clock as Hyunjin began to move towards him. Thirty seconds.. he could either wait it out and keep the ball, or risk passing.

If they take the ball, though, he thought. I have to keep it on our side.

Desperately, he looked to Hyunjin, who was currently being marked by an opponent. The clock began to count down, the crowd's cries becoming increasingly loud and frantic.

Twenty seconds.

Jisung barely managed to pass the ball to his friend, almost tripping, and Hyunjin exhaled as he moved towards the hoop, faster than he'd ever done in his life.

Much to his dismay, an opponent to his left brushed his arm as he reached for the ball, and nudged Hyunjin's injury, sending a shooting pain up his left arm. Crying out and dropping the ball, stumbling, he made to recapture it before someone whizzed past and stole it.

Jisung.

He had three opponents marking him now, and a clear shot of the hoop. They caged him in and Hyunjin fell unsurely, clumsy on his feet. His arm was beginning to throb sharply and it became hard to focus on anything else. He could only stand as Felix hoisted him from the ground and watch as Jisung dribbled the ball where he stood, looking for an opening.

Ten seconds.

Jisung made to move towards the hoop and was shoved roughly in the side. Hyunjin let out an outraged yelp but Felix held him back, just as Jisung fell down, shooting desperately at the hoop in a last-ditch attempt.

The buzzer rang as the ball hit the floor.

Everyone turned to look at the referee; they'd all missed the opportunity to see if the ball had gone in, and that too during the ending buzzer. There was silence as he debated the verdict, before lifting his left hand and signaling a point to Hyunjin's team.

The crowd roared in ecstasy, but Hyunjin was distracted; Jisung was on the floor, back to him, clutching his right leg.

Skidding to his knees beside his teammate and raising a hand for the medic, he glanced down desperately at his friend.

"Jisung," he gasped, panting.

His face was twisted in pain, his lips parting as he groaned softly, chest heaving. Hyunjin let the hair tie slip from his locks, his bangs falling into his face as he cradled Jisung's head.

Their coach and two medics came to assess his friend; one of them moved to take off Jisung's shoe. His ankle was already beginning to bruise severely, the swelling evident against his pale skin. Jisung cried out just as the medic attempted to move it gently to the left.

"Sung," Hyunjin whispered, the guilt flooding his system all of a sudden. "I'm so sorry, I- I got jealous, and I hurt you, and I didn't meant to ignore you for the entire tournament, it's just-"

Jisung was being helped into a sitting position, still managing to shoot Hyunjin a pained grin as he panted. "I know, Cap. Relax."

"Sung, I swear, I should have-"

"Yeah, yeah. I know you like her, by the way."

Hyunjin's head snapped up. The medics took no notice, and their coach stood to direct the others off the court. The crowd was now chattering amongst themselves, and Hyunjin was glad they weren't dead silent, staring at Jisung and his now-hurt ankle.

"Y-you knew?"

Jisung rolled his eyes despite the pain. "Yeah, I knew. It wasn't hard to tell. Besides, I decided to let you be mad at me for a while because I figured you had enough going on. You're welcome."

Hyunjin's eyes filled with tears despite the public situation. "Thanks. I'm so sorry, Jisung."

His friend waved a hand, his head lolling back a little as he hissed, the medic moving to cushion his foot. "Ah- shit, yeah, it's all good, man. I don't like her, by the way."

Hyunjin blinked at him. "You don't?"

"She's nice and all, but nah."

Hyunjin let his shoulders sag in relief. Touching Jisung's hand, he smiled at him just as a tear ran down his cheek. He felt overwhelmingly happy all of a sudden; they'd won the championship, he'd made up with his friend, and now he could finally relax now that Jisung didn't like Y/n. Of course, there was still the matter of whether Y/n liked him, or anyone for that matter, but Hyunjin brushed that thought to the back of his mind, letting it sit quiet and forgotten for the time being.

Jisung smirked at his friend, his face sweaty and flushed. "Felix has a girlfriend now. That volleyballer chick. He confessed to her before we left and they're planning to meet up. Think it's about time you did the same thing, Hyunjinnie."

Hyunjin's eyes met his friend's a little sadly. "I don't know where she is."

"Felix said he saw her walking down the corridor by her form class earlier. Apparently just chilling out by herself since we don't have classes because of the game."

Hyunjin squeezed Jisung's hand. "I don't want to leave you."

His friend waved a hand. "Go. I'll be fine, they're probably going to take me to the infirmary. We'll see you later, okay?"

Hyunjin nodded and stepped back, letting the medics lift his friend and sling an arm over each of their shoulders, carrying him off the court.

He congratulated his team briefly and shook hands with the other team before slipping out of the gym. An increasing sense of urgency settled in his stomach, each step he took fueling the fire that had been burning in his heart since he'd realised what Y/n meant to him.

Please, he thought desperately as he broke into a run. Please let her be here. I don't care that she didn't watch my game, I just want to see her.

He skidded around a corner and saw a figure sitting in one of the window alcoves, a sketchbook laying open beside them. The page was blank. Hyunjin's heart leapt so high and hard he thought he might lean over and throw it up.

Y/n.

He cried out her name and broke into an even faster run, skidding to a stop beside her. His sneakers screeched against the floor and he doubled over. It wasn't for long, though, and as he hauled himself upright, he felt a pair of arms wrapping tightly around his shoulders.

He clung to her, burying his face in her neck. She didn't seem to care how sweaty he was; her hand came up to cradle the back of his head, undoing the braids from his hair, fingers shaking.

"Hyune," she said quietly. He realised she was crying as he pulled back.

"I missed you so much," he murmured, leaning his forehead against hers.

"I missed you too. It felt like forever, I was so alone-"

Hyunjin shook his head, an unexpected tear running down his cheek. "You're not alone. You said it yourself, you never have been."

She nodded vehemently, still holding onto his shoulders. Hyunjin stepped back a little, his arms still wrapped around her waist. He took a deep breath steeling his resolve.

"Y/n, I have to tell you something."

Her voice was quiet. "Me too."

Hyunjin's heart was thudding so hard it hurt. Now that he finally had the opportunity to tell her how she made him feel, he suddenly found he didn't have the words. It all rushed out of his head in an instant as Y/n looked up at him with wide, wet eyes.

"I don't know how to tell you," he whispered.

"Show, me then."

Hyunjin inhaled sharply, his eyes not leaving her gaze. Taking her chin in a shaking hand, he stroked it affectionately across her jaw.

"Close your eyes," he whispered, throat bobbing as he swallowed.

She did.

Hyunjin leant forward slowly. Surely she knew what he was doing, touching her like this, talking to her so softly. But she didn't back away, didn't back down, just stood close to him, held in his arms, and let Hyunjin kiss her.

She tasted salt and sweat and affection and she tilted her head a little, letting her hands touch his face, though shakily and experimentally.

Pulling back after a minute, Hyunjin rested his forehead against hers, breathing heavily. He was still holding her waist, and her eyes were still closed. Hyunjin watched a tears slip down her cheek and brushed it away with a warm thumb before it reached her jaw.

"Please don't cry," he murmured to her.

"I'm not..."

Hyunjin chucked softly, feeling so overwhelmed he could do nothing but hold her as if she was an anchor in a stormy sea. "Am I that bad of a kisser?"

Y/n opened her eyes, looking away from him. This time, there was no teasing remark, no playful insult, and it made Hyunjin's heart soar so high he felt like he was floating. He stroked her cheek as he looked back at him, both their tears falling freely.

"You're not alone," he whispered. "You'll never be alone, Y/nnie. I promise."

Y/n nodded, running a hand over her shoulder as Hyunjin pressed two fingers to her cheek, wiping away her tears.

"I know."

Hyunjin chuckled quietly, still holding her. "Yeah? How do you know?"

Y/n smiled up at him, eyes wet. She felt a little embarrassed, but to Hyunjin, she was the most beautiful person in the world, even if she was crying.

She touched his cheek.

"Because now I have you."

taglist (open) : @kozumesphone @bangchansgirlsblog @ms-flowergirl @stayriversflow @hhwangsmoon @steddie-steddie

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[apolloagain]

Chapter 40.

Damn. Okay. I have thoughts and feelings. Was glad the other day to see the author thanking someone for a comment that "gets it" because my hubris makes me think that I Get It and would so prove that if I had an ao4 account yet (and yeah it was a good comment lol). But this one has challenged me!

I felt my "indignant" levels go through the ROOF this chapter. We all knew that Sarah's suffocation plan wasn't going to work, but that made it quite easy to root for her attempt. So seeing that fail - and I don't know about anyone else, but that was my last stab at a suicide plan for her - and then the doctor's "Lucky you don't have a choice" after her very sincere but pragmatic speech that could not make her wishes clearer... damn, I mean, I felt the frustration. I really really did. Like some fucked up cousin of Kafka where the system is completely built to circumvent yourself despite your best efforts, except everyone won't STOP caring and "loving" you. Notice how I put loving in quotes? I've been enjoying living through Sarah vicariously, feeling her rage and humiliation but also enjoying it, being a step above as the horny dream-god-reader I am. But this time... well, sure, still doing that a little, maybe. But feeling Sarah's nightmare quiteeee a lot this time! I FELT felt that trapped rage and humiliation and it DIDNT feel good!

First of all, like said, the lead up really has made this a claustrophobic and aggravating place. But then the punishment... okay, damn, look, the spanking before was hot, but somewhat subdued. Even the degradation seemed to end very quickly. But this... wow, jesus fucking christ. Way beyond that. I mean, whipping her BACK???? That's fucked up! That's really visceral! Jesus!!! I'm not at all surprised to hear that every other instance has been under that threshold, but wow, yeah, this one... double the threshold... I can believe that too! Sure, sure, making her say "Yes Mistress" is hot and dommy and whatever, except honestly, the actual content of the punishment is such an upsetting change of pace that I can barely take that in.

This sounds a little like a criticism - it's nothing more than my honest reaction. In reading all of these chapters, I guess I make meta-fantasies. So here's the one I realised I was having for this one: I really wanted Sarah to not back down. The glorious human spirit, I don't care what you call it. I want her to keep saying how until she's been abused to a shocking point. I want Rose to realise what she's done in a savage-hypocrisy- in claiming to love her, instead inflicted real physical damage and torture and really, really hurt Sarah. I wanted the guilt to come crashing down on her, for her to try and say sorry but know nothing can help, for to realise that she took a massive gambit and it FAILED, Sarah WON, the bluff was called and Rose went above it and is a monster for it and Sarah still didn't back down even though she's asking to die and part of Rose really now can see why, which makes her want to as well.

This sounds like a pretty morbid and sadistic fantasy. It IS morbid, but it's not sadistic- again, Sarah being whipped on the back was honestly not nice for me. It's more a fantasy of childish self-pity, like a "They'll all be sorry about how I treated me" catharsis. I don't think I'm the only one who wants it, as you can see in the comments confidently projecting their "predictions" (see: not so subtle wants) saying that Rose will soon find out that torture doesn't work. Sorry guys, but I don't think it's going to NOT not work!

Most of my fantasies have been, sans Sarah submitting and loving the affini, kind of from Rose's desires- that is to say, it's taken delight in the adored cooing and embarassment of watching Sarah play pretend on screen, even though I think that I've experienced a lot of that fantasy THROUGH the placed-perspective of Sarah (urgh, there are literary terms for what I'm trying to distinguish here, but even if I could remember them it would be muddled by me being a messy switch lol). But what happens right after Rose's eyes are glowing then? Sarah poops the party with Facts and Logic, putting what she's doing both matter of factly - Hab wouldn't make her feel "self-conscious" - and presenting it as a bad thing Rose is doing that further proves that her narrative of "love" is self-serving and illegitimate. When she does this, Sarah has to fight holding back a smirk. That's HER bratty ol' fantasy, a self-satisfied rage against the machine that's not just calling them klats and being violent to herself/rude to them, but undermining their control, shaping the narrative her way, no, fuck you, I can condescend right back because this is a disgrace, I'm indignant, I'm RIGHT, this is NOT the story you think it is, fuck you, I hate you, die. That's a cathartic fantasy in and of itself. And I've indulged in that meta before reading this... but not much. Firstly, because from the title alone we know that it's a foregone conclusion. Secondly, because the other one is hotter lol. But thirdly... well, look at how I'm feeling indulging heavily in those emotions and narrative right now. I wanted Sarah's suicide to work! Beyond that, I wanted Rose to go overboard and harm Sarah ONLY so that she can feel bad about having done so. Undermining Rose's system by undermining Sarah. It's self harm, ultimately. Sorry Sarah, but the horrible truth is that your way of life leads to harm. It's too destructive a fantasy, ultimately helping no one.

And yet... and yet this chapter did still make my indignation levels go critical. And I think that despite looking forward very much to the next few chapters, I found this one less enjoyable than maybe I was meant to. Ifelt bad for Sarah man, I just did! Am I taking it too seriously? Am I getting too wrapped up? And YET And Yet... that comment that had the author saying they "definitely get it"? Well, I take comfort from it, because I think I really DO get it- because here's part of it:

Sarah has made a lot of really good points. It does make me hope that Sarah will be able to win some sort of victory. It won’t be a total win - a total win against the Affini is impossible. But some sort of concession or something. You know?

I do know. Apparently we'll be heading to the C Chapters soon, so I have little faith in Sarah holding out for some melodramatic shadow of what my righteous justice wants here- she'll be saying Yes Mistress eventually, progress will be achieved, and I imagine the next few chapters of her Actual Punishment are going to be a lot of fun again, hopefully in a more attractive way than how genuinely shocking the back whip thing was. But overall.... well. Like I said, there are two fantasies at play here, and I believe they both need satisfaction, and I believe Ms Floss (feel like that's a good way to distinguish between character and writer lol) knows that too. I think that by the end of this story, Sarah will be sprouting by some of her own terms as well. It wouldn't be right to have her whole heartedly become a Winston Smith without any rebellion meaning anything, because I wouldn't be able to love Big Brother myself. Sarah's fire will burn, the Affini leaves will catch it somewhat, and there'll be a small mutual respect and understanding for the girl who stoked it. Even if most of said relationship is built on her being the most adorable floret the world's ever seen, who can't believe they were ever so nasty and allergic to happiness and are sure to get teased and reminded by Rose for it.

A spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down.

"Every Sophont is a Seed" is a really good HDG fic. Sarah rages like a force of nature, her resistance to the Affini is incredibly strong-willed and really feels like a proper fight (despite, you know, the inevitable). There's good reason for it too- to be THAT much of a fighter, you can't just be intelligent and stubborn, but genuinely, well, mentally unwell and destructive. The arc is going to be a long and richly deserved one.

Also it's hot, also it's regularly updated.

[keespah]

Tagged by @themostunoriginalpersonever thanks! i almost never get to play tag games anymore lol

painting or photography // dusk or dawn // spring or autumn // movies or tv shows // chocolate or nutella // audiobooks or podcasts // card games or board games // fiction or nonfiction // cookies or brownies // dragons or unicorns // bath or shower // blue or yellow // rollercoasters or bumper cars // iced tea or hot tea // left side of bed or right side of bed // zip-up hoodie or pullover hoodie // straight hair or curly hair // gummy worms or gummy bears // rain or snow // sneakers or flip-flops // bowling or mini-golf // pasta or pizza

I’m tagging @goodnight-knight @sharkmittens @hydratail @darkness-revered @thegeekyturtlegirl aaaand anyone else who feels like doing it!

[good-beanswrites]

I have questions about that last fic. How did the prisoners alter their uniforms, and what were the consequences? What did they throw at Es? What did they trick Fuuta into eating and how? How did they try to catch Jackalope?

LMAO murder aside these ten know how to cause problems on purpose 😭 Hehe thank you for your curiosity, I genuinely had visualized some specifics for these while writing >:3 So --

Mahiru started sewing patches and ribbons and things onto her uniform dress. She got very bold very quickly, though, completely replacing whole sections with colorful fabric (like swapping out the entire skirt/bodice/sleeves) so it was pretty obvious. Es replaced all her uniforms with the standard ones and limited her requests to only small amounts of fabric at a time. (Who’s to say she isn’t secreting these away to patch together later, though…)

I was influenced by seeing two “what are the limits of Milgram’s no-violence policy, really” posts very recently. I think if the object could cause absolutely no harm, it’s possible to hit Es with it. I’m thinking basic crumpled paper or even a lightweight food -- something harmless but very sticky and gets in their hair… either way Es is Not Pleased. I feel like this could have been anyone except Haruka and Mahiru, as even the more "mature" prisoners would just be curious about what would happen.

My original thought was cake, but now that I’m fact checking I see that it grows mold pretty quickly… So maybe pudding: the eggs and milk spoil a bit before you see actual mold. Whoever has decided to be a menace (my guess is Yuno or Mikoto) puts up a whole farce about food preferences and whether or not they can identify specific flavors in this special dessert Jackalope secreted away, and unfortunately Fuuta is a hungry boy and it’s not very difficult to get him to take a big bite 😔

Jackalope lounges around the prison, chilling with the prisoners and taking naps in whatever place he finds comfortable. They try sneaking up to where he’s settled in, distracting him with treats and gentle words to see how long they can keep him in place as they give him gradually more noticeable pets. Muu has coaxed him into enough peace to take off his hat and pet his head, but no one’s managed to give him little scritches before he tries to regain his dignity and scurries away. Little do they know, he forces Es to scratch, pet, brush, and cuddle him every single night under the pretense of their official duties.

[sharkneto]

did you ever watch fargo? it has similar story beats to true detective, at least, season one (it’s another anthology type series, crime focused) there’s a dude in there who i think you’d get a kick out out of… very much quietly intensely batshit insane and Off™️ but somehow presents himself as the sanest one in the room. he’s rust cohle, in a way, but murderer, not detective

Thanks for the rec! Watched S1 over the past week or so. Was good but it frustrated me. Billy Bob Thornton Serial Killer was the highlight, you were right! He was very fun. What a weirdo.

I don't know if it was that I grew up in an area with accents like theirs so I was like, hyper aware They Are Doing An Accent, or that it was based on Coen Brother's work, but a lot of the characters felt... rather like caricatures? I don't know, something about it had a wall between me and it, where I wasn't immersed so they felt like We Are Actors On A Set Delivering Lines Really Well rather than I was in the moment, if that makes any sense. Maybe it was the monologues, Flannigan series can have the same affect to me.

Still, was a really good cast. I needed Martin Freeman to get his comeuppence like three episodes sooner, my god that man could just wiggle out of everything (SPOILER he sent his wife to get shot???? what the fuck is wrong with him. I was screaming SPOILER OVER). I always like it when Colin Hanks pops up in things. Allison Tolman and Billy Bob Thornton fucking carried the whole thing, they were the only two I didn't really get the I Am Delivering Lines With Emotion And This Thick Minnesotan Accent feeling.

Writing was generally tight, too. Good full circle moments and Chekov's guns, pieces came together in satisfying ways. Was fun to be rooting for Molly to catch her killers and for Billy Bob to fucking get Martin Freeman. I think it could have been one episode shorter, or skipped the time jump, to give the police a modicum more competence, they were killing me.

Idk if I'll watch the other seasons, I did enjoy it overall. Might check out the newest one because I'm a slut for Jon Hamm.

[spaceyflowerswriting]

my notifs are starting to scare me i cant believe that many people are looking at and enjoying my stuff