#technically yaoi i guess

[astrology-bf]

Crystal Clear

(CW: Dawntrail and other MSQ Spoilers, Light Angst, Implied NSFW)

After the unexpected illness of one of the Thavnarian delegation’s chief members, which was explained away as food poisoning (but likely the result of far too much mezcal the previous night), the Vow of Reason had found himself with a free afternoon. 

There were other matters that he might attend to, but Lamaty’i suggested that he take advantage of the opportunity and spend time on himself. Koana could tell his little sister worried that he wasn’t giving himself space to mourn their father’s passing, and she’d been quite delighted when he said he’d spend the day out in the city. Which was true: he just wasn’t specific as to which part of the city he’d be going to, that being the For’ard Cabins where the Warrior of Light was staying.

He hadn’t given himself space to mourn intentionally, but his talk with Ifan on the balcony had helped greatly. They’d held each other tightly while they wept and found catharsis, and then they’d had a talk. A long one, during which Koana learned a great deal more about him. 

Ifan had explained where each scar came from. The ‘godbrand’ was Ifrit’s, as he had mentioned. The bullet wound was dealt by Yotsuyu goe Brutus, the now-dead Witch of Doma. The scars across his shoulderblade were from Nidhogg's shade as it possessed Estinien. The slice across his chest was from Elidibus in Zenos’ body: one that nearly killed him, had it not been for the intervention of Fordola and aforementioned dragoon. 

The worst one, however, was not visible. Ifan said another Ascian had piloted the body of a man he loved and lowered Ifan’s guard by feigning that the man had managed to regain control, before he struck him through the chest. It killed him, and that Ifan lived and breathed was solely owed to Hydaelyn. He didn’t say who the man was.

Koana had asked about his marking, too. He hadn’t given the tattoo much thought, as such were common in Tural, but when he gave more thought to Ifan’s body when he’d caught a glimpse of it he noticed how distinct it was: an ax upon Ifan’s right wrist, hafted with four sparking stars. Ifan had been hesitant, but then with honesty he told Koana about Ardbert and his friends. The Vow of Reason found the tale a little much at points, and had to wipe his eyes as Ifan recounted its unlikely beginnings and tragic, if bittersweet, conclusion. 

It also put some things into perspective, specifically one G’raha Tia. The man seemed roughly Ifan and Koana’s age, yet had the bearing and the manner of someone much older (for the most part). Ifan seemed near deferential to him, too, calling him ‘my lord Exarch’... a reference to his time upon the First, and of the vigil he’d conducted there. Ifan had explained how he and G’raha met, then parted, then met again. How much the pair had sacrificed for one another, and for the world. Two worlds, in fact. 

He hadn’t quite known how to feel about it all. It seemed impossible at points, traveling between reflections, or to the moon, or to the universe’s edge. Koana didn’t doubt Ifan was truthful, though, and as the tale neared its end the Vow of Reason settled on feeling sad for Ifan, appreciative that such a man desired his company, and missing Gulool Ja Ja since the Head of Reason would probably know just what to say about it. But Ifan seemed to feel better having talked about it to a friend who had fresh eyes, and reassured Koana that he would be all right and would speak to Krile and G’raha about how he felt. And he’d thanked Koana, earnestly, before he’d asked the Vow of Reason if he’d like to talk about his family.

Koana’s instinct was to say he didn’t, but after Ifan was so truthful he would have felt ashamed… So he talked. He was honest with the Warrior of Light about his feelings towards his father and his brother, his wondering if there was something else he could have done to dissuade Zoraal Ja, or stop him at the very least, how he missed his father but wondered if either of Gulool Ja Ja’s heads had actually believed in him, and how he thought he knew himself and felt that he was flailing but unable to speak up because being Dawnservant was what he wanted. Ifan listened while he held his hands, and didn’t judge him. And when Koana finished speaking, he felt a little lighter.

They ended up in conversation longer than Koana had expected, and though he’d missed a planned engagement he didn’t feel it too dishonest to apologize with the excuse that something urgent had come up. It had: Ifan needed him, and he had needed space to grieve, as well.

While Ifan appeared fine enough when they had parted, their talk was on Koana’s mind as he considered what he’d do with his free afternoon. Even if Ifan was busy, he wanted to check up on him. So he took the aethernet to the For’ard Cabins, and then made his way to Ifan’s door before he knocking politely.

There was no answer for a moment, and then the shutting spell upon the door was disengaged. It opened to reveal not Ifan, but rather G’raha Tia. 

“Oh!” The archon blinked at Koana, and then smiled brightly. “Vow Koana, what a pleasant surprise.” he said.

Koana blinked in turn, lips pursing for a moment. He’d forgotten that the red-headed Hhetsarro - Miqo’te, rather - had opted to share Ifan’s cabin. Which made sense, as they were partners. Koana tried not to think too hard about the fact he’d done… things… with the Sharlayan’s lover, and gave a courteous nod. “Apologies. A good day to you, G’raha Tia.” he greeted, giving a small smile.

G’raha’s ears flicked happily as he grinned. “And to you, as well. What may I do for you?” he asked, expression settling into a friendly smile.

“I…” The Vow of Reason had to pause and clear his throat nearly inaudibly. “I had come to see Ifan, but I would not wish to disturb the pair of you.” he explained, feeling his cheeks tingle. He wasn’t quite sure if it was embarrassment, or if it was the warmth in G’raha’s eyes.

“Not at all.” answered G’raha with a small shake of his head. “He is only gone briefly to fetch food, and should return shortly. You are more than welcome to come in and wait, if you would prefer. I confess I have been wanting the chance to speak with you myself.” he suggested, stepping aside and inviting Koana in.

Koana tried not to swallow visibly. He couldn’t hide forever, and Ifan had assured him that the archon was quite fine with it. And G’raha seemed entirely friendly, and quite pleased to see Koana, too. So he nodded. “If I am not imposing.” he said, entering the cabin.

“No imposition at all.” replied G’raha cheerfully as he closed the door behind them. “Will you take refreshment?” he offered, gesturing at the table where water and some beverage bottles had been placed. 

“I am fine for now, thank you. Your hospitality is much appreciated.” responded Koana with a gracious nod.

“‘Tis the least I can do after you and Lamaty’i have taken such good care of Ifan and the others, to say nothing of your own hospitality.” replied G’raha with a small laugh as he moved to lean against the table.

Koana’s ears flicked and he gave a faintly bashful smile as he clasped his hands behind his back. “We have been blessed to have your aid and friendship. I wish only that your first visit to Tural was under less troubling circumstances.” he replied, unable to stop the faint twinge of misgiving on his face.

G’raha seemed to notice, his smile growing more sympathetic. “You have my condolences, Koana. If there is anything I am able to do…” he offered, head tilting slightly with a small note of concern.

The Vow of Reason found himself a little heartened by the archon’s words and smile. Speaking to him was quite soothing: no wonder Ifan seemed enamored of him. “It is appreciated. You have my heartfelt thanks.” he answered, giving G’raha a warm smile. Then he nodded. “Time is what is necessary, I would think.” he added.

“Of course.” answered G’raha with a nod. Then he hummed. “Well… If you should want for any counsel, I have some small experience in leadership. Though you seem to be settling into the role with more grace than I did mine, I confess.” he offered, giving Koana a kind grin as both his ears flicked.

Koana felt a smile pull at his lips, but privately he found the archon’s words ridiculous. Ifan told him what that ‘small experience’ entailed, and yet there wasn’t any hint of false humility in G’raha’s words. He just seemed the sort of man to view that sort of labor as a triviality considering the prizes, and one who didn’t hesitate to put himself in danger for the sake of others. A hero, if Koana had to put a word to it, and of the kind most people would describe - rather than Koana’s use of the term to describe the author of one of his favorite works on Allagan history. He found himself admiring the Miqo’te for quite different reasons than his scholarship. 

He have a thankful nod. “Ifan had mentioned you had a task of some responsibility.” answered Koana, diplomatically. “Though that was his perspective, which he admitted was incomplete.” he added.

G’raha raised an eyebrow and an ear at the revelation, and then chuckled. “You are welcome to ask, ‘tis less a secret and more exceedingly complicated.” he said, giving Koana a wry nod.

Koana felt his lips begin to twist as he looked G’raha up and down. There was a question that he had, one that only could be answered by someone like his father. He hadn’t had the chance to ask, because it hadn’t yet occurred to him until he and Lamaty’i were actually on their own, leading Tural. He swallowed. “...Was it difficult?” he asked.

The former Crystal Exarch’s expression settled into something thoughtful, though his eyes remained on Koana sympathetically. He gave an honest nod. “At points.” he admitted. “The nature of the service meant there were many sacrifices, but… I would do it again, given the results.” stated G’raha, firmly. Then he huffed through his nose in faint amusement at himself, and nodded. “That said, had I the opportunity to correct my errors: I would tell myself to be less distant from those in my charge. And more mindful of my own welfare… for my own sake, and for Ifan’s.” he finished, giving the Vow of Reason a reassuring smile.

His words were indeed reassuring. Based on what Ifan had told Koana of the Crystal Exarch, he seemed a near impossible man: one that had lived centuries and rewritten history to avert a Calamity in the Source and save the First from both Sin Eaters and itself. That someone like that stumbled, made errors, and would correct himself if he were able… It made the task of being Dawnservant less daunting. Certainly much more so knowing he could seek out people like G’raha and Ifan for assistance. “You give good counsel. I will keep it in mind: thank you, for bringing me some ease.” he said, giving an appreciative nod. “It is obvious why he values your company so highly. You seem very happy together.” observed Koana, smiling slightly to himself as he remembered the way Ifan’s face always lit up when he was speaking of the archon.

G’raha’s smile turned slightly bashful, his ears splaying in gratitude at Koana’s compliment. Then he gave the Hhetsarro a knowing smile. “I daresay the same applies to you and he, as well.” he said, wryly.

The Vow of Reason pursed his lips, one ear lowering awkwardly. Of course Ifan had already told him that they’d… But perhaps he hadn’t, and Koana was just poor at concealing it. He cleared his throat a little. “Is it so obvious?” he asked, chin lowering a little as his toes curled in his boots.

G’raha couldn’t help but chuckle at the look Koana had on his face. He tilted his head reassuringly. “Endearingly so. You need not be nervous.” he answered, ears flicking briefly as his tail curled. 

Koana felt his cheeks begin to burn a little. His gaze started to drift off to the side, finding the situation difficult to navigate. He swallowed. “...I would not wish to come between you.” It was a few moments before he realized his unintentional innuendo. His ears rose up as his expression fell, then he pouted as his ears splayed flat and tail curled in embarrassment.

Where Ifan would likely have teased him, G’raha blinked and pouted slightly to conceal a little smirk. Koana noted a faint tinge of pink appear upon the archon’s cheeks as his ears flicked back in amusement: a strangely boyish bearing for a man of G’raha’s true age, but one that suited him immensely. He made no comment on it, however, save a small chuckle. “Neither he nor I are of a sort to be jealous of our feelings.” he reassured. “I do not doubt his affection or loyalty, nor he mine. If anything, ‘tis all the sweeter seeing how happy you and my dear champion make one another.” he said, giving Koana a delighted grin.

An appreciative huff left Koana’s lips. He closed his eyes as his ears flicked back, nervousness ebbing thanks to G’raha’s quite comforting demeanor. “He does.” he admitted, with a nod. “He has been very patient with me, given my inexperience. I am curious how much he has told you.” added Koana, a little hesitantly.

G’raha’s face settled into a soothing smile. “Nothing specific; he and I respect the wishes of those that prefer discretion.” he explained.

Koana admitted that surprised him. Ifan seemed so casual with his bed… but then again, he’d not said anything about even the neck massage in Kozama’uka. Lamaty’i had no idea that he and Ifan were that close, nor were there rumors of a tryst between the Vow of Reason and the guest from overseas. Ifan kept his confidence, save to his partner, and even then he’d limited it to what was necessary. G’raha, too, was keeping Koana’s confidence.

It took him a few moments to identify the feeling, but Koana realized he felt safe around the pair. Neither of them judged or pushed him, and both sought to keep his trust. He’d barely spoken to the archon, and already he’d been given sage advice and reassurance. Koana felt lucky, too. His ears flicked, and he gave a very happy nod. “That is very considerate of him, and yourself. You have my thanks.” he stated, earnestly.

G’raha grinned at him warmly, and Koana felt a little swell within his chest at the delight on the Miqo’te’s face. “‘Tis no worry, I well remember being inexperienced. And I would wager that he does, as well. We were not always as certain of what we liked.” he added, glancing off to the side with wry amusement.

His words brought to mind something Ifan said, the night he and Koana kissed for the first time. The Vow of Reason felt his cheeks darken again. “He said you might like to kiss me.” he muttered, looking off towards the side.

The archon raised an eyebrow. Then he hummed as he looked Koana up and down, fighting a smirk. “My mighty champion is rarely wrong in that regard.” he admitted, giving the Vow of Reason a small wink before he chuckled at himself. 

Koana blinked furiously and pouted slightly, ears splaying back. He was far from used to one man flirting with him, let alone a second. Especially considering the second one was G’raha Tia, of all people. The Vow of Reason gave an awkward chuckle in return. “I will admit, this is not how I imagined a conversation with you, after reading your thesis.” he stated, ears relaxing.

G’raha’s ears shot up, all coyness vanished and replaced with incredulous delight. “Oh? You have read it?” he asked, giving Koana a wide grin as his tail curled happily.

The sudden shift in demeanor made Koana blink again, but he immediately returned a smile at seeing how thrilled the archon was. Just looking at him made the Hhetsarro feel warm. He nodded. “It was most thought-provoking. One of my favorites, in fact.” he said, his own ears giving a flick.

A happy huff left G’raha’s lips. “I should love to hear your thoughts on it! It has been an age since I have actually looked at it, myself.” he admitted, it likely being a literal age since having done so. 

Koana made to answer, but was interrupted by the shutting spell upon the door being disengaged. “Hope you’re hungry, ‘Raha.” said Ifan as he entered with a paper bag in hand: quite a big one. “Aunt Tii gave me extra-” he stopped and blinked as he caught sight of Koana, looking between him and G’raha. Then he scoffed, and gave a happy grin. “Well, if this isn’t a lovely surprise.” he proclaimed, closing the door and heading to set the bag down on the table. 

G’raha’s ears wiggled happily as he hefted himself up from where he leaned. “Welcome back, dear heart. Koana was being a most gracious host and entertaining me in your absence.” he explained, giving Koana another smile. 

Ifan glanced at Koana, then smiled thankfully in turn. “Sounds about right.” he chuckled. Then he walked up to the archon and leaned down for a kiss, meeting G’raha’s lips languidly.

Koana pursed his lips a little and looked away while the pair kissed. His eyebrow rose, however, as their lips parted and Ifan moved over to him. “Hey, you.” he greeted, and leaned down to kiss Koana in turn. The Vow of Reason’s ears and tail shot up at being kissed in front of Ifan’s partner, but the Hyur’s familiar feel and scent had him relaxed enough that he returned it. He glanced at G’raha as Ifan stood up, and flushed at the small wink that the Miqo’te gave him. 

The Vow of Reason cleared his throat, then looked up at the Warrior of Light. “Ifan. Good day to you.” he greeted, wincing slightly at his formality considering the circumstances.

Ifan smiled down at him, reaching up to give his nose a little tap. “And you. Thank you for taking care of my dear lord, I apologize for interrupting.” he said, glancing over at G’raha.

G’raha shook his head. “We were just about to discuss my old thesis.” he stated, looking at Koana with clear intent to dredge him for his thoughts on Allag. He hummed, then glanced at the large bag. “If there is extra food… Would you wish to join us for lunch, Koana? You have my curiosity rather piqued, regarding your thoughts.” His ears flicked in excitement as he extended his invitation.

Ifan let out a teasing groan. “Here we go. Someone mentioned Allag around G’raha Tia.” he laughed, then stuck his tongue out at G’raha in retaliation for the latter doing the same. Koana had to chuckle at the sight of the two men doing so. Then Ifan turned his gaze back to Koana with a happy grin. “Well?” he asked. “I wouldn’t mind spending a little more time with you as well, dear prince, if you can spare it.” Then he reached up to brush his thumb against Koana’s chin.

It struck Koana then just how at ease he felt. He had no pressing tasks, the carne asada in the paper bag smelled heavenly, and the company of these two men was equal parts thrilling and comforting. He had a lot of thoughts on The Decline and Fall of the Allagan Empire , and sitting down to talk about it with its author and his partner sounded wonderful. Ifan seemed much happier than he had done up on the balcony, and while he wasn’t sure if he’d talked to Krile or G’raha about his misgivings yet, it also seemed Koana himself had helped immensely, much as Ifan and G’raha had for him. 

It was strange. Normally he felt so tightly wound, like if he let his guard down then a spring would fly free of some clockwork mechanism that would jam and catch on fire. But right now, he felt he was in good hands. So he gave a grin, and let his ears wiggle openly before he nodded. “As it so happens… I may have some time to spare.”

[detective-piplup]

you can’t hold onto something you yourself pushed away.

[micahdotgov]

happy 52 years of woodstein

[sxilor-1010]

Everything Stays is such a Dalv coded song to me.

I mean, beside both characters being vampires, it just seems like something would Dalv hum to himself in the Ruins.

Not to mention parts of the lyrics are fitting with his situation before Clover came to the Dark Ruins. Isolation in the dark, and yet the underside of Snowdin is lighter as it always was even after he comes back.

"Let's go in the garden,

You'll find something waiting,

Right there where you left it lying upside down.

When you finally find it, you'll see how it's faded...

The underside is lighter when you turn it around.

Everything stays, right where you left it,

Everything stays,

But it still changes...

Ever so slightly, daily and nightly

In little ways, when everything stays..."

[penguin-scribbles]

“Together, then!!”

hi macnacross reminded me of vampire world bubbline so this came out of it 🙃

[hellsvestibule]

If I can figure out how to censor the dick and balls maybe I’ll post the eye hole fucking (it’s ethical eye hole fucking ok, he’s immortal and does not die when things go in and out of that eye it just fucks him up mentally for a bit)

[trashiest-person]

so about those bottle npcs on penacony

(I'd probably redesign them since the new pic shows me their models better)

in game screenshots:

rambling down here dont open if u dont want to see (note: the Bottle & Glass thing is smth you'd understand if you know abt the "Crystal Chalice" hidden mission)

ok im lil bit crazy about them theres so much character i can put into these guys

so like im imagining in Bottle & Glass society, if a Bottle has a heart tag on them it means why have already found a "Glass" to fill their booze with. so they are eachother's "Glass"!!!!!

im thinkin that Poor was just chillin and one day Rich was like

"I like you. Do you have a name or can I call you 'mine'?"

"...What?"

"...Will you date me?"

and Poor was just so shocked at this incredibly, very obviously high-quality Bottle of Wine in front of them, they just blurted out "uh, sure"

and boom, they're dating.

Poor was probably just waiting for the right glass to come into their life, but after they started dating Rich and thought more about how they feel about Bottles they had an "oh." moment and realized they're probably the bisexual equivalent of Bottles & Glasses.

and Rich after dating a couple of some of the finest Glasses realized why they were so unhappy with these Glasses after they let their mind drift to dating a Bottle. "Oh." They were Bottlesexual. Honestly it didn't have to be Poor, they just picked a random Bottle nearby that was single and wasn't eyeing any of the Glasses passing by. Little did they know they'd fall over heels for this Bottle.

(note: i spent 30 mins writing another paragraph on here but i lost it bc im dumb and forgot to press post or smth idk but it didn't show up

but basically, Rich gets flustered when Poor flirts back to them for the first time bc they aren't used to genuine affection that isn't meant to just convey an image in high-society)

tl;dr: im insane

+ scrapped idea im dropping since i reread that screenshot and i don't think it fits:

im also thinkin that like Poor & Rich were originally just friends. and Rich already figured out that they preffered Bottles but didn't really say anything to Poor, and Rich was helping Poor look for a Glass for him thru Rich's connections as a high-class Bottle

AND thru a couple of (failed) dates w/ multiple Glasses later, Poor eventually clicked w/ a Glass and they started dating. and so they got what they've been looking for all this time and stopped talking to Rich often. but whats this????? they feel.... UNFULFILLED???!?!? and when they think about the time they spent with Rich they.. MISS TO SPENDING TIME WITH RICH, LOOKING FOR GLASSES TOGETHER???

"oh. oh my god..?"

they'd rather spend their time with a Bottle? rather than with the Glass they've been chasing after for so long..?

on yet another date with a fairly beautifully-crafted Glass filled with cheap booze...

"Hey, are you alright? Usually you'd drag me over to see another attraction by now."

"...I'm sorry......"

"Pardon?"

"I-uh..I'm sorry....... I don't know if i want to keep doing this."

"...What do you mean?"

"You're a beautiful, stunning Glass but I... I-I think that I don't feel very happy being with you. I'm so sorry."

"..."

"..It's just that I-! I think-!! AUGH!!! I can't say it!"

"..Hey. Tell me. I want to know."

"..i might be in love with Rich... "

[astro-b-o-y-d]

This week is just DND yuri and Transformers yaoi

[highlycursedfbmarketplace]

Huh

[julie-su]

Yaoi ok 👍

ok 👍

[pseudophan]

i need to be a bitch somewhere and where better than pseudophan dot tumblr dot com (said in a very honoring way love you nora)wait pause i just heard like a squeaky rubber duck noise out my window. im on a 10th floor in nyc. hello? okay anyways i need to keep being a bitch ducks aside but oh my god fics have been so unreadable lately. why is everyone so obsessed with doing like yaoi gender roles to them. i dont think ive opened smut i havent clicked out of in months at this rate. like every single one is like "ohhh phil is a delicate helpless uwu little princess and dan is the big strong manly man" im actually going to start killing people like it is so insufferable why does no one hear themselves. do you people hear yourselves? for real? pause i just heard the duck again. is it an omen do you think

LOVE the journey this ask takes you on first of all, i wonder what the duck's fanfic opinions are it seems eager to share

i haven't read enough fic recently to comment on ALL of them but i can't say i don't get where you're coming from cause a lot of what i have seen... yeah... and look if that's the dynamic someone wants to portray in their fic that's whatever i guess, i'm not here to police people's fiction, but it is annoying that there's so much of it. kinda feels like we're back in 2015 just with the roles reversed

the whole uwu princess phil thing is largely brought on by dnp themselves and i don't even have a problem with that at all, by all means live your precious baby angel smol bean (sigh) dreams phil but what bothers me a little is the part where a lot of people take that and feel the need to then make dan, like you said, some Big Strong Masc Dom Top like can we be sooooo serious for just one second... again if thats what people want to write porn about whatever i guess but i totally agree the sheer amount of it is a bit.......... hmm........

this isn't just fics though it's the way people talk about them in general. at least with fics you're technically allowed to write whatever the hell you want, it's all fictional, but when it's posts talking about their real life selves .... 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

[asteria7fics]

I am absolutely in the mood to read an essay about Kyle's portrayal in fanwork 👀 i could read South Park analysis till the cows come home

Alright alright I’m ready to get into this haha.

A couple of things before I start, everything I’m about to say is just my opinion, yeah? I’m no expert, I just think that the way the fandom treats Kyle in a lot of circumstances is… questionable :)

Oookay, let’s GO!

So believe it or not, I don’t actually read a ton of fanfiction. I don’t really have time these days, and when I do I’m so painfully picky about the way certain characters are portrayed that it’s very hard for me to find fics I really vibe with. That being said, I see a lotta shit on this fine website.

Let’s get the obvious shit out of the way. I do not think Kyle should be the default bottom in ANY ship. If we wanna really get into it, my personal take is that this is a holdover from yaoi/fujoshi culture that is so painfully steeped in heteronormative bullshit of one person needing to be the ‘dominant’ and one needing to be the ‘submissive’ even outside of the context of kink. Essentially, one character has to be the ‘girl’ and one has to be the ‘boy’, even in a homosexual relationship.

I’ve blabbed about this before, but I don’t think I’ve ever talked about why I don’t think that Kyle should be the default ‘submissive’ in his relationships.

First of all, Kyle is just not submissive. At all. Or I should say, he isn’t often. I think the only context where he tends to submit is with his mother, and if you really want to sit here and defend your choice based on him having ‘mommy issues’, I guess you can technically say that.

Personally, I see Kyle as being very headstrong and, honestly kinda intense. While this hasn’t always been super consistent in his personality early on in the show’s run, it’s certainly has been now. I mean, he was willing to shoot at his friends’ moms in The End of Obesity because he believed so strongly in what he was doing, and why he was doing it. Kyle’s stubbornness and unwillingness to waver on his morals and values is a driving force for conflict in the show, like, all the fucking time, whether he’s correct (as in, the creators agree with his stance) or not.

I bring up his personality in the early run because I do think a lot of the issues I have with his characterization now comes more from early fandom portrayals than anything that’s actually currently supported by the source material. As an example, Kyle being the weakest physically of the main four makes a lot of sense in the context of those early seasons, but it doesn’t really work with his current characterization, if I’m being honest.

This isn’t to say I dislike him being sickly, mind you. I actually think that can be really compelling if Kyle has to grapple with the fact that his physical weakness is at odds with his mental strength.

Hoooowever, I think this has to be done in a really specific way, and this sorta brings me to my next point.

Why are we out here victimizing Kyle so damn much? Like, I get it, bad shit happens to him in the show (don’t talk to me about Humancentipad) but why are we just tormenting Kyle for seemingly no reason? Are we in the middle of a dead dove arms race?

I do think this ties back to this idea of Kyle being a default submissive, and I’ve certainly not always been kind to the kid in my own work but damn you guys are fucking mean to him. What did he ever do to you??

I suppose tormenting characters is sort of… par for the course in any fandom, but man I just don’t see the appeal of it being Kyle that’s getting the brunt of the abuse, especially when he ends up being reduced to a helpless, pathetic little thing. Like at that point just pick a different character, I mean Butters is right there you guys.

I’m not going to act like any one ship leans more or less into these tropes either, I think all sides of the fandom are guilty of disregarding a lot of what makes Kyle’s character compelling in the show. I will, however, take a moment to complain about some of the popular ships that Kyle is in.

Kyman: You know how I feel about these two. A stellar dynamic with so much problematic shit bubbling under the surface. Let’s disregard the inherent discomfort around an open anti-Semite and a Jewish person being together because… I willingly ignore that to ship Yentlman in my main works (rip self read). Even without that bit of their relationship, these two are just too goddamn similar. Both stubborn, both going to extreme lengths to prove the other wrong, OR enabling one another to do some pretty shitty things.

I think Post Covid did it best by showing how they BOTH bring out the worst in one another. While I enjoy these two platonically, I don’t personally enjoy romantic ships that are this toxic.

I’ve also expressed before that I think a fic lives and dies on how Cartman is written, so while this post is about Kyle’s depictions in fan works, I do think we have to consider the way the other half of a pair is written as well.

I got some really lovely tags on that one post I reblogged and word vomited all over that brought up how Cartman, supported by canon, is a severely traumatized individual, and how that can support a more sympathetic view of him (I’m not tagging the person in case they don’t want to be involved in discourse like this but I appreciate your insights and you made a very good point, if you are reading this).

This does, however, bring up a whole other host of issues with their dynamic. If we’re romanticizing the idea that Kyle is some kind of moral savior for Cartman then… man, idk. You guys are gonna have to help me on this one, is that common in the ship? Is Kyle playing therapist with Cartman, and that’s how we’re justifying sanitizing him?

Also, say it with me now, there is no way in sand hell that Kyle would let Cartman top him. I know, I’ve read it, and I can see where the idea is coming from but come on. Kyle is too prideful for that shit. Now if y’all start giving me Kyle topping Cartman and making him fucking beg for that hot Jew sploog then MAYBE I’d be able to get behind this ship.

Style: Oh you thought my preferred ship was safe? Haha no ma’am, because Style shippers are the fucking WORST when it comes to feminizing Kyle.

I respect the Style shippers that came before me with their football star Stan and pissbaby twink Kyle, I really do. However it’s time to move on. I made this point in a previous post (that I know you’ve seen my friend, much love for your support on my hot takes) but for those who didn’t see it, I really believe the thing that separates Kyman shippers from Style shippers is that Kyman shippers tend to treat Kyle like an equal to Cartman, while Style shippers really lean on Kyle being weaker than Stan to make their dynamics work.

What’s really funny to me is that what I think makes Style work in its best iterations is when they are truly treated as equals, because they absolutely should be.

Now I may sound like a hypocrite here because I know I play around with power dynamics in my Styles quite a bit, but I think I make it very clear that even when Kyle is technically bottoming, he is not necessarily submitting.

I also can give credit where credit is due, Kyman shippers do not shy away from how much of an asshole Kyle can be sometimes. Style shippers though? Man, I understand wanting to lean more on Kyle's positive traits (he IS a very empathetic, friendly, driven person that always wants to do the right thing) but he can become 'too good' very quickly when you don't balance those things out with his negative traits.

Kyle is pretentious. Kyle thinks he knows best even when he really doesn't. Kyle is quick to anger and sometimes cares TOO much, to the point of getting carried away and making things worse (rip to Canada).

The only negative trait Style shippers are pretty consistently on board with is him being hotheaded, which is fair! But also? To stay consistent with my current branding, that's like seasoning all of your food with just salt and pepper. Like sure, it adds flavor, but we all know the dish could taste so much better if you sprinkle on a little something more.

K2: I am... Utterly indifferent to this ship. Like, I've seen some cute fanart? But I've never partaken and it doesn't really interest me, sorry gang.

Cryle: Another ship I've never really partaken in, but that makes significantly less sense to me. It's giving crack ship, which is fine? But from what I have consumed a lot of people sort of approach them with all the worst aspects of both Kyman and Style. Craig is not as compelling as Cartman as a foil for Kyle, so when people do lean into the evil Craig headcanon that was common in early fandom, it seems they also lean into the pathetic, victim Kyle tropes that are common in Style works.

I'm sorry if y'all love this ship, I'd never really paid it any mind until recently and while I have read works that included them that I thoroughly enjoyed, I don't think I'll ever root for them to be endgame.

And if your favorite Kyle ship isn't here, sorry to say I don't know enough to speak on them (in fact I shouldn't have even brought up K2 for that reason, but I figured someone would probably mention it since it seems pretty popular).

Look, this is a mess and I am certainly not the authority on characterizing any of these goobers. But you asked, and I hope you enjoyed my silly little opinions. This is in no way meant to be constructive, but if you guys want something more organized and constructive breaking down how I characterize Kyle or any of the kids, you know where to ask!

[talxns]

I lOVE LOVE LOVE your brudick fics, I cannot stop reading them they are so delicious and addicting.

But I was wondering what got you into this amazing ship😌 and what is your favorite canon moment between them.

🖤💛🖤💙🖤

Thank you 🥹 I really appreciate it because I often struggle to see the worth in my own writing.

I had liked Batman from childhood but only got interested in brudick around 2016, not sure what it was exactly that opened my third eye to it, but I love toxic age gap yaoi so it was destined to happen lol there are several formative fics that I read at that time that really cemented my love for brudick, such as @holy-batmans story A Baptism of Fire, lacemonster’s Mirrors (currently privated and unavailable on the archive), & [orphaned account]’s You are forever in my mind.

As an adult I have a greater appreciation for adult Dick and Bruce’s relationship and the dynamics that form when they are older. But I still love any point of their relationship.

As for my favorite canon moment! That’s really difficult! What even is considered canon lol I’ll just share some particular moments in the comics that I really appreciate.

I love the scene in Robin Year 1 where Two-Face is beating Dick to death with a baseball bat and Bruce flies toward Harvey like a wraith

I love the embrace between Bruce and Dick in Robin & Batman after Dick saves Bruce from Killer Croc. Bruce’s horrifying realization that he’s trained Dick to kill himself to save others, not anticipating that it’d be his life Dick was willing to die for.

Bit of a throw back to the golden age (so maybe technically not canon), but I love when Dick gets beaten up so badly that Bruce is rushing him to a doctor’s house in the middle of the night for emergency treatment, and he threatens to kill the doctor with his bare hands if he doesn’t operate on him.

Also when Bruce goes out as Batman without Robin but keeps a portrait of Robin with him the whole time because he wanted to have him with him in spirit, are you kidding me???

Golden age Brudick is amazing. Also a huge fan of Bruce just. Giving up completely when he thinks Dick has died. He just goes limp and says “whatever guess i’ll die” . and this happens multiple times.

Literally any time Bruce thinks that Dick has died and either becomes brutally murderous about it or becomes a wreck. weeping for him like in Injustice or golden age comics. it really shows how integral Dick is to Bruce’s mental stability. How much he means to him!!!

[cosmicroadkill]

Hey so remember forever ago when I said I would tell people about my silly little Transformers AUs and then my interests immediately pivoted to something else ngmgjgdmgd

So yeah, uh, it's been a hot second and now I'm embarrassed by them; okay, well, one of them anyway, but I did say I'd talk about them so

I'll talk about the one that I think is actually pretty good which is the empurata Optimus (or I guess technically Orion since he never gets the matrix of leadership in this one) one. (False: as I tried to write this I found that I, in fact, am very much embarrassed by this one as well, there's no winning here jgdjtsjdt)

So basically Orion, while softer in his approach, is still very critical of the world around him. In this case he is invited to come speak to the Senate directly but it's a trap; he is captured and put through the process of empurata, changing him in a way that makes him unrecognizable and stealing his life from him.

Orion, of course, is inconsolable and it's made all the worse when they make it seem that he was actually murdered by dissonants meaning not only would no one believe him if he did try to get help but it increases the rising tensions.

Of course it wouldn't be my AU if it wasn't half baked so basically somewhere along the line of trying to find new work to keep himself afloat he meets Megatron who he becomes very close to but he also runs into one Senator Shockwave who offers him a job as his personal guard (mostly because he finds Orion wonderful company and also because he genuinely wants to help and believes his story)

Que a conflict of interests type deal where Orion feels himself pulled between his loyalty to both (his brotherhood with Megatron and his budding romance with Shockwave) with everything coming to a head when a full blown revolution breaks out. Things happen and Orion somehow helps Shockwave get his hands on the matrix but when Shockwave begs Orion to come with him he tells him he can't, that he owes Megatron to much, that he's *changed* to much, and ends up joining the Decepticons under the name Nemesis because Doomed Yaoi TM

[bentosandbox]

Lappy fancam animatic blogging/production notes

now that wolfgirlyaoi is out on global its rambling time about my powerpoint presentation

Concept

Originally I wanted to do an (Tex & Lapp) animatic with the boss theme (broken wall/Signore dei Lupi .mp3) ever since the event dropped but I thought 1) by the time I finished anything someone else would have probably already done it first (lol, lmao even) 2) I remembered the song exists and how much i looped it then while listening to the group's new album drop and thought the lyrics fit Lapp a little too well and also doesn't end abruptly like the boss theme + was shorter so yea

initial stickman storyboard where i put down the lyrics with event dialogue/happenings that i felt would fit nicely together > hastily scribble the images that form in my head

storyboards were basically what i wanted to see (same rule as my comics) lol especially if they weren't shown in the event CGs, eg. there's a CG of the truck crashing into the courtroom so I didn't do that but they didn't mention her physical acting in that scene + the song I used has a bow/salute at that exact part in their live choreo with the very similar line so I wanted to do a homage even though-

-I was like it's going to be such a pain to figure out an economical hand twirl and bow but I have to do this I need to transplant the image in my brain onto the screen because official media did not do a—

Honestly still don't know if its a common phrase and action combo because I was having so much trouble finding external references that wasn't just scrubbing the live video over and over anyway

part of the storyboards were 'recycled' from comic drafts I did (of the chocolate scene because ofc) when the event was running on CN

Originally I wanted to draw Lapp feeding Texas for The Girlyaoi Funny but I wanted to reference the plaque you get which is a Creation of Adam reference right but I also saw people saying it's referencing the scene from Silence of the Lambs lol so...peel the layers to your liking!!

(The chocolate flavour choice was from asking my Columbian friends what the worst chocolate flavour they ever tried which was white coconut)

my sorry attempt at colour keys > final spreadsheet to keep track of progress and paste all the dialogue i put in

Art Direction

A bunch of shots/colour schemes are references to Måneskin's stuff or other media tehepero I'll just put a few here

At first I was going to limit red/blue to tex/lapp respectively but since Omertosa is blue I just did away with that rule and lapp gets to have both (and more!) these two colours have pretty obvious emotional readings I think but also

red = self blue = society Siracusa or: red = yaoi & blue = yuri

for the others:

Purple = Alberto/Saluzzo, its not orange like the fruit he keeps holding because see below; I needed the colour for something else LOL Also the Saluzzos are iirc nobility or whatever and they have purple hints in their clothes so I think it was a good fit anyway

Yellow/Orange = Its supposed to be representing the last word in the story which apparently, yostar went with 'Savagery' which is Correct I guess but (laments again about how nuance is lost in localisation because imo savagery has a more derogatory kind of connotation while I think 蛮荒 in context of the story also has a 'nature/untouched by civilisation' side to it) which is why Texas setting the house on fire was not (entirely) red but orange (and it complements the blues both visually and thematically) and it's yellow at the end when they're frolicking(?) in the wilderness lol

(these colour rules don't apply to the penglog shot and technically a few frames like the shot with shocked penance, the one right after and 'im just lappy' because...i forgor my own rules lol)

The greens/teals were just a reference to the shades in the 3DPV I think

The silhouette/general style was inspired from the 3D teaser thing they had at the beginning of the 3.5 anniversary stream and the card suits that I..forgot to move to the other layers which is why only the green one had them (supposed to be 1 per set 💀)

The clash bit is basically the same as the event CG but with a flipped camera/POV sorry for world's worst screenshot lmao. Couldn't imagine the poses in my head so I ended up posing 3d models in CSP pretty good posing practice

These shots got rendered extra because..they were the first frames I started on and I was still figuring out how much to simplify lol

I also posed the chairs shot for some inexplicable reason…my file was lagging so bad

Headcanon part (kind of)

The childhood flashback scene is probably the part I took the most liberties (headcanon) on since it's not explicitly canon like the rest...the sequence/how I connected the scenes itself to fabricate a timeline of her childhood was kind of inspired by some weibo post musing about how (iirc) texas's sweet tooth maybe came from when she was being fostered at casa Saluzzo and Lapp treating her like a pet essentially and giving her a lot of treats since...you know what happened to her actual pet hehe except maybe texas offered her a stick first and then Lappy just reciprocated endlessly because its one of the few 'acts' she knew that wasn't violence haha yeah this section was basically a stealth doujin sorry

It's mentioned that she was brought up as the ideal Siracusan or whatever and she does the cute doodle in the 3DPV so I thought she probably had the Forced Music Lessons as a kid (The music sheets are Bella Ciao and of course)

The bow choreo was the one thing i really wanted to animate but the music sheet segment (based on that one split second shot above) ended up being my favourite part even though compositing the motion was a mini hell on it's own (ended up compiling a long png to scroll by with the red doodles layered over)

Other things

I will never live down my (self-imposed) shame of misspelling the title (I fixed the title on youtube but its why the ending shot in the upload says ZittE e Buoni instead of ZittI e Buoni) don't rush your fancam in 10 days 😔

I didn't look through the entirety of the EN loc but Idk why they had Lappy say 'Then go.' to Texas when it's supposed to be more like 'Let's go.' as in, 'let's go together' as opposed to 'alright off you go to the greyhall alone' lmfao also her saying goodbye forever padre when addio is right there

I don't think I'm insane enough to do another ppt soon but man this pair really makes the 'imagines a whole music video while listening to music' part of my brain go wheee like first it was Starset's Manifest then Signore de Lupi then this and while working on this one i was thinking how Måneskin's Torna A Casa would be another good track

ok ty for reading #GIRLYAOIREAL

[absolutebl]

Okay, I just finished Laws of Attraction and I have some questions. Why does it seem so stylistically different from all the other shows (kind of like Manner of Death which I know you've mentioned is like, not really a BL)? Is this a lakorn (Also what is lakorn? Thai soap opera?) Or is it just that the setting was like with actual grown ups so it feels different to the usual high school/university shows? But it was so low heat! I felt like it should have been more mature. And it seemed a little higher quality but like...also not. Clothing? Great. Acting? Pretty good. Fighting and special effects?...meh. Is it the production company? Or are there actually lots of shows like this, I just don't know about them because I get my info from a little Tumblr BL bubble? Next, I LOVED pining bodyguard/pathetic rich bb. Those gazes went to my SOUL. WHERE CAN I GET MORE OF THIS? It's a little reminiscent of the whipping boy trope which you've covered (at least their power dynamic), but Tan wasn't really cruel to Thee. I guess I'm looking for Tall Quiet and Deadly x Broken Babyboy? Also I would like to vote for Chan as Best Dressed. Especially his wedding cloak? Fabulous.

Why does it seem so stylistically different from all the other shows (kind of like Manner of Death which I know you've mentioned is like, not really a BL)?

Because it's more a gay romantic suspense drama than a BL.

So MOD, Trapped, Laws, probably I Feel You Linger, 3 Will Be Free, Not Me. These kinds of shows owe more of their DNA to the suspense genre than to BL. They use BL trappings and tropes but their narrative backbone isn't actually yaoi dependent.

Is this a lakorn (Also what is lakorn? Thai soap opera?)

Yes, mostly. Not quite. Their first show: To Sir, With Love, is a TRUE lakorn and it's WILD.

Technically lakorn means just "drama" in Thai but in reality it has evolved to imply melodramatic soapiness, it has a lot of similarities to telenovelas.

But it was so low heat! I felt like it should have been more mature.

That's the pair. MaxTul they are not. I think of them on a heat spectrum

MaxTul - 3/3

KarnNut - 2/3

JamFilm - 1/3

And it seemed a little higher quality but like…also not. Clothing? Great. Acting? Pretty good. Fighting and special effects?…meh. Is it the production company?

That's just Thailand.

Next, I LOVED pining bodyguard/pathetic rich bb. Those gazes went to my SOUL. WHERE CAN I GET MORE OF THIS?

It's a little reminiscent of the whipping boy trope which you've covered (at least their power dynamic), but Tan wasn't really cruel to Thee.

It's whipping boy: attack dog + spoiled prince pairing.

I guess I'm looking for Tall Quiet and Deadly x Broken Babyboy?

You know who loves this? @heretherebedork they might have more suggestions here's some of the top of my head.

Never Let Me Go

Where Your Eyes Linger

Golden Blood

My Beautiful Man

Also I would like to vote for Chan as Best Dressed. Especially his wedding cloak? Fabulous.

RIGHT?!!!