[Tacones Rojos] Chapter 16: A Little Hot Mess
Summary:
ACT II: GABRIELA
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Feeling conflicted and guilty, Gabriela decides to pay a visit to someone who (probably) has all the answers.
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The room was still dark when Gabriela finally opened her eyes. Every part of her felt sore, and she strangely felt the chill in the air. For a moment, she forgot where she was, wondering why the room seemed so different.
It was only the soft snoring next to her that made Gabriela realize how her night had ended up.
Oh. Oh no.
Panic, then guilt, swept her up, and she instinctively clutched the blanket closer to her. “What have I done?” She whispered to no one in particular, her eyes glancing next to the person sleeping soundly across the bed. “What did we do?”
The man shifted a little in his sleep, his mess of curls framing his peaceful face. His hand was outstretched towards her, and it made Gabriela’s stomach drop. She buried her face in between her knees, contemplating on what to do.
She wanted fun, and she got it. Their encounter led itself into a one night stand that was filled with passion that burned her insides. He built her up and watched her fall apart in his arms multiple times throughout the night, and if given the choice, she would gladly let him do it all over again.
But there was something that Gabriela couldn’t quite piece together. Somehow, the way it felt was the same, yet so different. The sex with him was intense, and she loved it, but the way he worshiped her, cared for her needs, and even went as far as wrapping her in his arms while they drifted off to sleep — worried her.
Gabriela quietly repositioned herself off the bed, and froze when he suddenly murmured.
Stay.
Tears suddenly sprung to her eyes. They barely knew each other, and she hadn’t thought to ask his name, but she was certain he had irrevocably fallen head over heels for her. “I can’t.” She choked, resisting the urge to caress his cheek. It felt all too personal too soon.
She had to get out of there, away from this unfamiliar room. Gabriela knew that she would break his heart by leaving, effectively cementing their night together as nothing more than a memory, but she needed to pull herself out before she even got too deep.
The sky was starting to color with streaks of beautiful oranges, reds and yellows, peeking behind the mountains of Monserrate when she exited the building, pulling the thin coat she thankfully thought to bring with her last night for warmth.
She had fallen for his charms, even just for a little bit, and she feared she’d make the same mistake again if she stayed.
…
There was a heavy pit sitting at the pool of her stomach, threatening to churn the waves of emotions she battled over. Gabriela sat quietly on the bus going to the other side of the city. She didn’t have a reason to feel guilty, though part of her wanted to mourn for what could have been.
She had initially contemplated going home, but dismissed it, dreading the possible questions her friends would throw at her. She was grateful that the streets were thankfully still empty, save for a few night owls and graveyard shift workers making their way home.
Without a second thought, her fingers hovered slightly over her phone screen, carefully typing out the words to a message.
>Can we talk?<
She didn’t even bother to check if it would be well received when she managed to find her ride. As she looked out the windows, watching the outline of the mountains recede and replace itself with towering buildings, she tried to keep herself together. There was still a long way to go, but it was more than enough time to get her thoughts in order.
…
“I didn’t expect you to drop by suddenly. I hope you weren’t waiting too long.”
Gabriela cautiously entered her brother’s apartment even as he motioned for her to come in. She felt glad that her brother didn’t take her sudden intrusion into his space as a nuisance, though she could not avoid the awkwardness that made her so guarded. She had only been in his apartment a handful of times since they reconnected, and while they were on good terms, most of the time they met outside at a restaurant or café to catch up.
Not today, though.
“No, not at all. I just arrived myself.” Gabriela murmured, shaking her head when Julián reached out a hand to take her coat. “Sorry, I know it’s such short notice and I’m not sure if today is a bad time, but I really needed someone to talk to, and…”
Julián didn’t hesitate while calmly leading his sister to his couch and prompted her to sit. “Woah there, manita. There’s never a bad time for my baby sister. Wait right here while I get you something to drink.”
While Julián was busy in the kitchen, Gabriela tried to take in her surroundings, realizing she had not taken in much of the details of her older brother’s living space. The living room did not have the typical layout of a bachelor living on his own — unlike the usual neutrals and leather, Julián’s was warm and inviting. Sure, he had a few musical instruments laying about, and a huge TV in the center of the room, but there were plenty of knick knacks on the shelves and color in the room that reminded Gabriela so much of their childhood. His couch was a nice, deep blue, and the accent walls popped out at her. While Julián was a few years older, it never stopped them from essentially gaining the same interests and tastes, especially since they came from a creative family. Gabriela couldn’t help but eye his records piled neatly in the corner next to his model figures.
It felt familiar to her, like she was seventeen again and all was right in the world. They haven’t been living at their family home for a number of years now, but it reminded her of it.
“What are you looking at?” Julián asked his sister when he returned with a mug of chocolate santafereño, handing the hot drink to Gabriela who took it gratefully. “Careful. It’s hot.”
“Nothing in particular.” Gabriela blew away the steam before taking a small sip. “I was just thinking how I never realized your place felt so much like…”
“Our house? That’s because it kind of is.” Julián shrugged, taking a seat opposite his sister. “Mamá usually changes some of the decorations when she visits to match the seasons.”
“Oh.”
An uneasy silence fell and Gabriela had to fight the urge to jiggle her knee.
“They asked about you, you know. If you’re doing okay.”
“What?”
Julián gave her a meaningful look. “They’ve never stopped asking, every time they visit here it’s the first thing they want to know. Even yesterday…”
“Did…did you just come from Chía?” Gabriela’s eyes turned wide like saucers. “Is that why you asked me to wait for you because you’re driving?”
Julián didn’t say anything else, making the emotions and her carefully crafted questions thrown out the window as the world blurred around her. “You were visiting them! I can’t believe I made you cut it short because of me…”
Gabriela didn’t realize she had started crying until Julián gently took the shaking mug out of her hands. “Hey. Hey.” Julián quickly wrapped a comforting arm around his sister. “No, no. It’s fine. The moment I received your text, I was already preparing to head back here. I guess it was timely enough, but I should’ve gotten home sooner.”
“I’m pretty sure Mamá and Papá hate me even more now.”
“What makes you say that?”
“They’ve been asking you about me, and…Marco…my ex…has been over the news lately. They told me…I was a fool when they first kicked me out…”
“Papá has told me multiple times how he regrets that night you left home. It’s the one thing he’d like to do if he could turn back time. He was angry that you fell for someone who…you know, attracted trouble, but he hoped that you were happy, at least. After the scandal broke and spread over there…if anything, the tabloids are fueling his anger towards your ex. Not you.”
“Then why haven’t they reached out to me all these years if they regret so much…? It was easy for you to do so.”
Minutes passed. Or maybe an eternity had before Julián managed to get the words out. “They don’t know how to start a conversation with you, manita. You weren’t on such good terms with the family when you had left.”
Much had been said, and Gabriela pondered over it all as the last of her tears ran empty, shivering up her spine in noiseless sobs. “I don’t think I can face them still, Julián.”
“Why?” Julián took a good look at her, confusion scrunching up his brow. “Did something else happen?” Her brother’s face grew dark which made her flinch. “Did he do something to you, Ella?”
“No, it’s not him, Julián.” Gabriela trembled. She contemplated telling her brother what had happened the night before and decided it was in her best conscience to confess. “It’s me. I did something…that I shouldn’t have done at all. And what’s worse…I think it’ll haunt me for the rest of my life.”
…
Ávila was close to ripping their door open and tackling Gabriela to the floor when the latter came home hours later. “Where the hell have you been?!” Ávila half-screamed, arms flailing around while chewing Gabriela out. “I thought something terrible had happened to you!”
“I was at my brother’s house and my phone went dead.” Gabriela winced under Ávila’s glare. “We hadn’t seen each other in a while and I lost track of time. Sorry, Ávi.”
“Can you imagine the panic when José told me this morning that he lost track of you last night? I had half a mind to call the policía and report you as missing.”
“But I’m here now, though.” Gabriela padded herself to the kitchen where José was trying to keep himself distracted by obsessively cleaning the stove, with Ávila following close behind her. “And why would you even call the police?”
José stiffened when Ávila cleared their throat. “Because someone thought it would be a good idea to place a bet.”
“It was in good faith, amor!” He protested before a look from his beloved cut him short.
“And as I was saying,” Ávila continued. “What kind of person wouldn’t be worried if they found out their best friend had been having drinks with a complete and total stranger? Like, I know everyone at the bar is well-equipped to handle any problem customers that might try to take advantage of those vulnerable, but you disappeared for hours without telling any of us where you were going. What if your ex suddenly showed up and kidnapped you by force? What if the secret admirer you were drinking with turned out to be a serial killer and my BOYFRIEND had inevitably led you to your doom?”
“He’s not like that though…” Gabriela started to say before she could stop herself, and the room immediately fell deathly silent. “Ay Dios mío, forget I said anything.”
“Oh no, no, no. Sit. Down.” Ávila hissed when the initial shock passed, pulling a chair for themselves and Gabriela. “Spill.”
Gabriela crossed her arms across her chest, as she attempted to avoid meeting Ávila and José’s eyes. “It’s nothing.”
“You’re avoiding my eyes. It’s definitely something.”
“You’re just imagining things.”
“I’ve known you for years, chica. And I know how you can’t even lie to save your life. So spill.”
“...”
The tips of Gabriela’s ears felt hot and she wished the earth could swallow her whole. At that moment of vulnerability, her brother’s advice came ringing in her ears.
You have nothing to be ashamed of. Life changes at any moment, so what will you do?
What will she do?
For a moment, she caught a glimpse of the future in that room, spending another night tucked in his sheets, smiling up at the man whose eyes held the deep mysteries of the universe. But she would never have the chance again.
Not all of your questions will have the answers.
But what if it does?
So stay.
“I slept with the man at the bar.” Gabriela quickly confessed, clenching her fists so tightly that her nails dug into her palms. She ignored Ávila and José’s shocked expressions and Gabriela pushed on with what she wanted…NEEDED to say. There was no other way but forward, and while there was a chance for her to connect with him in some way, she needed to figure herself out. “It’s complicated, and if it wasn’t for the bet…I’ll tell you both all you need to know, but first, I need you, José, to swear not to tell him the truth.”
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