#t website is just being weird atm

[groupalpha]

Y'know, interesting question for the iterators:

What do y'all think you'd look like as slugcats?

13ES: I'd like to think I'd look like the forest subspecies under my structure. I'm most familiar with them, and I think they'd understand me.

EPS: I'm... not sure. But I think I'd be good with combat.

12FAD: I'm not quite sure either, but I think I could be fluffy, especially since my structure outputs cold instead of warmth.

EB: I think I'd possibly have a longer tail? I'm not quite sure, my apologies.

RSbSS: I'd be EXTREMELY flexible I think! Getting into things others couldn't! It'd be super fun!

[hmm-self-indulgence]

Lonely Avatar!Reader x platonic Archive staff crackfic headcanons (requested)

Request : Heyo! Idk if your requests are open atm but I wanted to request a TMA platonic fic + maybe crackfic about reader being an avatar (bonus points if they’re Lonely aligned) that just appears sometimes in the archives like some cryptid and acts like one (ex. Found in odd places, stands in front of doorways, found *doing* odd things in odd places) just to fuck around with staff, especially Elias (probably quaking at all the weird drawings of capybaras in magical girl outfits and can’t do anything about it). Preferably season 1-2 to make it more funny I hope you have a good day/night! P.S. I really liked your Nikola and Michael fanfics ^^

TW: Reader is a lonely avatar, Elias gets messed with.

Sorry this took 89 years to post! Hope you enjoy! @johnnyjohnnyjo

No one has the permission to repost this on any website. I will not post these on other websites so if you see any of my writing on another site, let me know. Do not use my content or claim it as your own! I do not own these characters, they are made, owned and are the property of Johnathan Sims. I am in no way profiting off of this and this is made with full respect to Rusty Quill.

Martin may have brought a dog into the archive, but you showed up on your own acting like a weird ghost cat that appeared a bit before Sasha admitted to knowing Michael. You were known for doing odd things in the institute building and showing up in places you were not supposed to. Although Elias told the archive staff that you were banned from the property, you kept getting into the building and no one else cared about Elias’s orders. If security has not kept you out, then obviously Elias was all talk, right?

A list of crimes committed in the Artifact storage (list not complete, just the most noticeable incidents)

T posing on top of the cursed table, was told off by artifact storage workers and asked to leave.

The Fractal vase was missing, eventually found in the workplace kitchen. The Vase was positioned under the sink tap, and water had been pouring into it. It is unknown how long this went on. The vase was somehow empty when picked up, and was returned to artifact storage. When the security cameras were checked, it was found that Y/n had moved the vase.

The apple full of human teeth has appeared on Elias’s desk a total of 8 times and has never been checked out, considering it is a biohazard. While the cameras have never picked anything up regarding these incidents, Elias firmly believes you did it. No one else does, though. The apple has since been locked away tighter.

How the staff feels about you

Elias greatly dislikes you. While you might be interesting to Watch, your actions in the archives are disruptive and annoying at the best of times. He especially hates that he cannot See you enter the building, you just appear and disappear though the Lonely and he has no idea when you will appear. You are unpredictable, and Elias doesn't like that.

Tim thinks you are funny. You always have the oddest responses to his questions and you liven up the work day. Pranks are even more fun with you around, and he likes how sneaky you are. He always wonders how you get into places unseen, but with the Crime Talent of the archive staff he doesn't ask questions. Plus, you are a great listener, especially when he bitches about Elias.

Sasha is the only one who believes you are something supernatural. While she doesnt bring this up to anyone after a particularly insulting conversation that went along the lines of

Sasha: They teleport, obviously they are something supernatural.

Jon: It's not like you are even that perceptive. You just don't see them before they make themselves known.

Sasha: Ignoring how rude that was, I have seen them come out of nowhere. Try to refute that.

Jon: ? SuRe yOu DiD

But as long as you don't mess with her and her things, she has no problem with you hanging about the archives. She enjoys your conversation when you do speak, but is not bothered by the times she has seen you stare at the empty coffee pot for a grand total of 47 minutes without looking away or moving.

Martin is worried about you, to say the least. He thinks you are an enjoyable person, but he feels like you have an air of sadness around you that he just can't place. He wishes he could help, but doesn't know how to go about doing so. But what he can do is make tea and sit with you, something you both do often.

Jon has opinions on everyone, and he mostly just finds you odd. While he admittedly isn't that observant, and he genuinely thought you were an employee somewhere in the building for a long time before Tim told him. This confused him more, because he had no problem sending you to be helpful, and if you weren't an employee then why did you do it? He has sent you multiple times to do things like breaking into a building with Tim or getting somewhere to ask questions you should be able to. He is a bit annoyed, because ever since you showed up cursed memes have been added to his conspiracy board, and while everyone swears it isn't them, he does assume it is you, but he has not had any evidence to properly accuse you.

Bonus

The knock on the door interrupted Elias from organizing his office again. You see, there was an issue he noticed when he walked in that morning and realized all of his papers were out of order. While this could be seen as a janitor putting things back in the wrong place, he Knew better. It was you again. Honestly he wishes he could See where you were lurking today, just to know what crime you would commit against his holy archive next. He considered asking Peter to talk to the menace haunting the archives, but realized that asking two avatars of the embodiment of solitude and loneliness to meet would never go well.

“Mr. Bouchard? May I come in.” Rosie's voice drifted through the door, interrupting Elias from his pondering.

“Come in” he said, straightening up and dusting off his suit jacket as she entered.

“I have a file from the archives that was sent up, where do you want it?” She asked politely, knowing how stressed he was by the odd occurrences at the institute.

“The desk, please, I will look at it in a moment” He waited to move till she placed the folder down and left the room, closing the door behind her as quietly as she could. He tried Looking at the file from his location

When he checked the file, the first page was a statement from the Boneturners Tale, a statement he knew Jon had filed away and read a week ago. He was not afraid to see the next page, but he did not want to turn it, but the need to know and see cursed him, so he flipped it.

It was another goddamn capybara dressed like Sailor Jupiter.

[deeeelightfuldee]

Your ex taps you on the shoulder and says, “I still love you.” You say? ooooof. I don’t think i’d buy that. I hardly think people who DO show they have feelings for me are being truthful, so I doubt that.

Do you play video games? haven’t in some time, but I want to get back into it a little.

Do you spend a lot of time with family? oh heck yeah. I have a really great family.

Is your house more than two stories tall? nah, it’s the two stories with a basement.

Have you ever hit your significant other? Has he/she ever hit you? I will never raise my hands to another human being. I once dated someone who was a veteran and had severe ptsd. we were napping one time and he got aggressive. that wasn’t HIM though. 

What makes you an attractive person? (Talk about your personality too!) physically, I suppose I have nice eyes and a decent smile. personality wise, I am warm, friendly, loving, supportive, sometimes funny, very loyal.

What color is your hairbrush/comb? depends which one I use. I have a pink one right now. 

What snacks do you have available in your household atm? I honestly haven’t got a clue. I haven’t been let out of my room in 2 weeks.

Has anyone recently told you that they like you, or find you attractive? yes. it’s weird.

Are you attracted to the last person you Facebook messaged? DEF not. he has been asking me out since we worked together maybeeeee.. 8-9 years ago? 

Do you care about anyone that doesn’t care about you? yes! I am trying to learn how to undo that. it’s not that I don’t want to care about him, but I know and can soooooooo clearly see that he doesn’t care anymore, and it is extremely emotionally draining to watch.

Was your last Facebook friend requests from a male or female? I wanna say female but idk

Which one of your relatives is most likely to embarrass you? scott

When was the last time you ate a bar of chocolate? couple days ago.

Do you play any games on Facebook? Nope.

What would you like to get a degree in? I have two degrees -- one in psych and one in SLP. 

Do you wake up a lot in the middle of the night? ahahahaha yes. almost always wide awake from 3-6

Would you prefer to read a book, watch a movie or TV show, or play a video game? typically more in the movie/show or book mood.

Do you usually get popcorn or soda at the movie theater? Both. nothing like that buttery, salty goodness that obvs requires an enormous drink

What genre of films do you like the best? either make me EXTREMELY sad, or romantic.

How many bank accounts do you have? 2

Have you ever had the flu? Yeah.

What is your goal for the next few months? i have several. the only one that can/will be public right now, is to get my lungs back to functioning as they were.

Have you ever had some kind of sleep-disorder? How did it affect your life? yes. I have very bad breathing during sleep. I have had 11 sleep studies done, because my breathing will just stop randomly, which luckily my brain wakes me. it doesn’t really affect my like severely.. I function normally. but shoooooot, if I got normal levels of sleep i’d be a force to be reckoned with.

Have you ever had food poisoning before? Describe the experience. Yes. It was AWFUL. vomiting for 2 days straight. it was so gross.

Funny, charming, cute, romantic, smart - choose only 2 for the opposite sex. smart and romantic.

Have you ever let somebody use you? Why did you do it? hmm. I think there have been times where i’ve let people have more access to me than they should have had. or there have definitely been times I’ve been used in school groups. But honestly, I tend to be protective of myself. I stop when I feel enough is enough. 

You can go back in time & change something in your mom’s past - what is it? I would want either Bill to not die, or for her to be spoiled incessantly by someone else.

Do you know anybody who is around the exact same size as you? Who? psh. no. my friends are all tiny which is just not fun.

Ever been to a haunted house? How scared were you? Yeah. i found it so fun.

Been on any websites today you wouldn’t want your parents to see? ahahahaha no. 

Which is worse: dusting or mopping? mopping. i hate doing the floors.

Did you pull a senior prank? Not really advised when a homeschooler. 

Did you graduate? Yes. that was a rough, rough day.

Have you ever been unfaithful in a serious relationship? Nope

What was the last song you listened to? i think it was Happier than Ever by billie eilish. the lyrics are ... woof. 

Are you one of those lucky people with 20/20 vision? 20/12 -- the last time I had insurance anyway.

Is fashion one of your interests? honestly, if I had money, it would be. but it isnt right now.

Do you think you’ll eventually find that special someone? It’s getting harder and harder to believe that will be the case. I knowwwww I need to start dating, but every time I go to open up an app, I hesitate and chicken out. I just was so happy before.. its hard to think I could be able to offer anything to anyone right now.

Do you care what people think? veryyyyyy few people. I care about the thoughts of those I genuinely love and respect. However, I still ensure I’m protecting myself regardless.

Is acting something you enjoy? No. 

What was the last thing you broke/sprained? I have a bum knee, so I sprain that from time to time. I last broke a finger.

Have you ever fought with a friend because of their boyfriend/girlfriend? Because of yours? ahahahaha yes. but years ago. never because of mine.

Has a stranger ever yelled at you for your language? No. I don’t cuss. 

Whose house, other than yours and your families’, are you most comfortable at? probably either nathan’s or em’s.

Has any of your friends’ family ever yelled at you? alix’s family used to yell at me a lot for being fat. that used to mess me up. 

Did you ever play a sport as a little kid? Did you enjoy it? soccer. no, i found the endless running to be unnecessary. 

Did you ever watch the show Full House? yup

Is there a celebrity you are just DETERMINED to marry? no, thats so out-of-touch with reality

Have you ever burned someone’s picture? yes, i have.

What’s the longest hike you’ve ever been on? i think it was 8 hours. I hate hate hate hikes. But, thats because I have really weak lungs, so my doctor says it’s like lighting them on fire.

Would you ever get a lip tattoo? No.

Who is the first person of the opposite sex that pops into your head? kile

Do your parents smoke cigarettes? my mom hasn’t since a teenager. I think my dad does still. though, i dunno for certain.

What does one of your T-shirts have written on it? uhhhh, PTK honors society

Name a pet you definitely wouldn’t want. Any reptile or insect. <<<< same

Would you prefer your partner smaller or taller? Taller. 

Do you enjoy going through old pictures? Yes. very much so.

Do you believe people when they say they don’t judge people? No, i respect people who are truthful saying they either try not to judge, or that they do judge despite their desire to stop.

What did you love the most about the town you grew up in? sooooooo much. it’s small town-y, quiet, safe, lots of trees, family close by.

What’s a movie you cried the hardest during? ps i love you will always shatter my heart.

What’s your favorite restaurant? buona or ashford

Is there a dessert you don’t like? im not wild about pastries.

What’s a book that you read because everyone else was reading it? hmmm maybe that one mrs. pettigrews home for peculiar children.

Underwater or outer space? i’m fascinated by both. typically more interested in the water.

Dogs or cats? both. all of them.

Kittens or puppies? kittens.

Bird watching or whale watching? whales!!!!!!!!

What was your best subject in school? in HS probably history. or science. in college, psych or neuro.

What was your worst subject in school? Math. always freakin’ math.

What is one thing you wish you knew in high school? Uhhh. hm. i don’t think anything. I liked my experience.

Who is your fashion icon? nada.

Diamonds or pearls? Both are nice. I love pearl stud earrings and I really want a simple, one pearl necklace. I am kinda ruined for diamonds for some time. My favorite rings and necklace were diamonds from kile and I just cant bring myself to wear those anymore.

What color dress did you wear to prom? pink

Honestly, are you jealous of someone right now? oh sure. I am envious of those with bangin’ bods. I’m envious of those who have great finances. I am envious of those who live life married to their love. I’m envious of people who see kile regularly. But there are difficulties that come with any of those situations.

Honestly, when was the last time you REALLY cried your heart out? not long ago. the whole crushing reality of losing kile just destroyed me. I’m OK now.

Do you need to return anyone’s phone call? ahahahahah. I just reject all calls.

Who are you closest to? My mom and nathan rn.

Have you ever had a bad concert experience? no

Are you currently sad about anything? several things have recently been really saddening, but I’m ok. Ill get thru it.

Have you had any form of exercise today? Its going to be some time before I’m cleared for that. I almost faint from taking a shower and I have to be on oxygen after doing the one flight of stairs. 

Can you handle blood? doesn’t bother me at all.

Has any place hired you underage for a job? yes. I mean technically, I was legal to work in that I was 17, but the company didn’t want to hire younger than 18.

Have you ever carried a concealed weapon? not like in public, but at a house or gun range, yes.

Are you currently searching for a job? soon.

Does eating breakfast make you sick? i’m never ever ever hungry for it. I know i should, but its the worst. I don’t even like breakfast foods.

[icharchivist]

tbh when i first heard of the fire i was kinda thinking (and hoping) that it wouldn’t make Worldwide news because everytime it does happen well *waves hand* you know how things are. And if you don’t, boy you’re lucky.

As a Frenchie it was.. very shocking to hear at once. It’s part of our national identity and all. And we can say a lot of things, historically and pop-culture and religion stuff about it. 

But i didn’t expect it to have a worldwide appeal. It should have been expected since yeah i know popculture and people seem to like some stuff from France for... some reasons. (i mean i’m the first one to shittalk France. Esp since i’m a second generation from immigrants or oppressed minorities in France anyway. I don’t have any “French pride”.)

Honestly I was just expecting and hoping that this “little grief” would just be shared by a handful of Frenchies on social media and stuff. In a “wow i can’t believe one of the major monument of our country with a lot of dverse history basically collapsed and that makes me sad.” way. 

But it didn’t happen. People from all around the world started to react. And while it’s touching at first, there’s the underlining feeling of how a lot of people are going to be terrible about it, especially asking people why they even care (and i don’t think you realize how it feels when you’re reading those. You have no idea how those hottakes felt when the t/errorist attacks happened.)

and I guess i get frightened because, not the first time it happens as well, a similar tragedy always seem to happen elsewhere. Which France doesn’t hear about because we’re focused on our tragedy happening, but in the rest of the world well- I don’t know. People’s weird fascination with France I guess.

But then for a while there’s a lot of guilttrippy post about “how dare you care about the situation in France when this is happening elsewhere” (underlined with “well here’s all the reasons France is terrible so you shouldn’t care”) and everytime it sends me into lowkey panic. Because man, i didn’t follow that, and shit, i’m still emotionally stunned by what happened in my country i don’t know how to react to something else, and it makes me panic. 

Turns out something similar happened today. It happened during previous t/errorist attacks too. 

And I feel like those posts are mostly targetting at international people but this keeps getting me stunned and I probably have too much of a guilt complex of thinking i should be caring on every fronts that i get easily overwhelmed.

When people are getting negative about when those tragedies happen in France, it’s just rubbing salt in the wound for us. At least for me.

And idk i personally never, ever expected it would blow up worldwide. That’s even why i keep track of some of the tragedies on my blog because hey, don’t think you hear the proper details elsewhere. and I think it may just be a bubble. I started talking about the fire 30 mins after it started to give you insight. Most people hadn’t heard of it when I did. 

I know i should feel glad there’s compassion and such, but everytime it blow up worldwide, i’m just so unsettled. bc we don’t ask for it.

And especially since people have no sense of proper timing to know when to address issues linked to those. 

So i guess that’s why i’m in lowkey overwhelmed panic atm. Bc this happens again. It’s the 4th time since i’m on tumblr that i’m experiencing something similar. 

tbh I stopped blogging about most tragedies i heard from after the second t/errorist attack in france or so. Back then i desperately tried to keep track of every single stuff that was going on around the world, and when this attack happened i felt drained, and all i was seeing was post saying “but we don’t care about France, why don’t you care about that other thing” and i realized i just was.. unable to carry on on that rhythm.

I see it happen today. And it’s just another time. Where we can’t even just grief for a moment while the fire was still burning. Bc we had hundreds of takes all over social media about how to “quickly get over it”. like “oh but don’t panic they’ll rebuild it” one hour into a 6 hours long fire. Not the timing. And it just was very insensitive all the way around. 

So. Guess 4th time will be the charm and learn the lesson to just turn off social media when this sort of things happen.

But god. You can be sure that everytime a french things blow up worldwide i end up unsettled and want to scream. I was at least hoping that since this one had no victims, no one starting it, we would just at least accept our grieving and move on. I thought at least we were safe from p/olitical talks. We weren’t. 

(also how conveignant that the latest French crisis that had lasted 22 weeks so far had barely been mentioned except to make jokes about how we “got out guillotines” (we didn’t, and people were mad when we ruined their jokes telling them “huh no we have serious problems there”), something that shows shaky p/olitics, but as soon as there’s a “traumatic” event oh let’s talk for hours about why we should disrespect said trauma one way or another. I’m not asking anyone to follow French news. I don’t care. I don’t follow half of the news of others countries and try to not pay too much attention to American ones anymore bc i can’t do anything about it and it adds up a lot of things I should care for and panic about on a daily basis. But man you have the habits to take moments of us feeling kinda horrified by something that’s happening and immediatly coming with hundreds of thinkspieces about why caring about it is bad, actually.  As if there was no French people on this website to read you lol.)

idk i guess my point in this post is. I am uncomfortable everytime a French topic turn worldwide bc people has no tact. and it somewhat always happen with another tragedy elsewhere that others people ignore and as a frenchie suddenly i feel guilty for being hurt about something that happens in my country instead of what happens in another. Bc you keep wording your things Like That. And it’s so overwhelming man.)

Anyway I’ll return to my normal blogging tomorrow but that might explain why i’ve been shaking for a while. It’s not even the attacks themselves that i’m dreading about but those sort of reactions. And that’s honestly even sadder. 

So yea. Social Media sucks. Who knew.

[eldritch-bastard]

Rules: Answer these 85 questions and tag 20 people

tagged by @artie-pete thnek u

— What was your last…

1. Drink: water

2. Phone call: mi auntie

3. Text message: ”at the roundabout now”

4. Song you listened to: romulus by sufjan stevens 

5. Time you cried: about 4 weeks ago when i started a massive family argument :))

— Have you ever…

6. Dated someone twice: no

7. Kissed someone and regretted it: ya

8. Been cheated on: no

9. Lost someone special: yea

10. Been depressed: yes

11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: not yet

— Fave colours

12. purple

13. red

14. pink

— In the last year have you…

15. Made new friends: YEa

16. Fallen out of love: no

17. Laughed until you cried: Bih Yes

18. Found out someone was talking about you: oHHHH FUCIGN YEAH OH BOY

19. Met someone who changed you: YEah

20. Found out who your friends are: i mean?? yea???

21. Kissed someone on your Facebook friends list: at least 3, but like on the cheek and shit

— General

22. How many your Facebook friends do you know irl: most of them except like 5 or 6

23. Do you have any pets: 3 doggos

24. Do you want to change your name: no

25. What did you do for your last birthday: college work

26. What time did you wake up today: 9am  i think

27. What were you doing at midnight last night: listening to mbmbam

28. What is something you can’t wait for: the next elder scrolls game bleas

29. What is your favourite animal: doggo

30. What are you listening to right now: lmAo mbmbam again

31. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: Yea

32. Something that’s getting on your nerves: the student finance bloke at college not emailing me back like lmao come on m8, if u dont email me back i might not be able to pay for uni :))

33. Most visited website: tumblr.hell and youtube

34. Hair colour: brown

35. Long or short hair: short

36. Do you have a crush on someone: no

37. What do you like about yourself: Most Things

38. Want any piercings: i have my ears done

39. Blood type: god knows

40. Nicknames: Jennet, Nej, Jennet Marge

41. Relationship status: deprived 

42. Sign: Libra

43. Pronouns: she/her

44. Fave tv show: oHHHHHH atm Star Trek: The Next Generation 

45. Tattoos: I’ve thought about it 

46. Right or left handed: right

47. Ever had surgery: nop

48. Piercings: im good w/ just my ears

49. Sport: idk what that is

50. Vacation: na

51. Trainers: i guess??

— More General

52. Eating: Nothing

53. Drinking: w a t e r

54. I’m about watch: um the tv screen? bc i might play some viddy gams

55. Waiting for: nothign

56. Want: all my current problems to like,,, pipe down lmao 

57. Get married: yeah but also no

58. Career: HA i dont know

— Which is better

59. Hugs or kisses: hugs

60. Lips or eyes: eyes

61. Taller or shorter: both good

62. Older or younger: yeah wot context?

63. Nice arms or stomach: both 

64. Hookups or relationships: both r good

65. Troublemaker or hesitant: ???

— Have you ever

66. Kissed a stranger: no

67. Drank hard liquor: yea

68. Turned someone down: yea and it was bad bc i thought he was alright but then he came up in my messages being really fucking weird like. 

69. Sex on first date: no

70. Broken someone’s heart: lmao i hope not

71. Had your heart broken: yea, when i found out u can’t romance nick valentine and deacon

72. Been arrested: nop

73. Cried when someone died: Ye

74. Fallen for a friend: No

— Do you believe in

75. Yourself: yea

76. Miracles: no

77. Love at first sight: yes bc the first time i saw deacon in fallout 4 i fell in love w/ him

78. Santa Claus: No

79. Angels: no

— Misc

80. Eye colour: green

81. Best friend’s name: aMy dubois, bronwiddle lucinda von fuc, one (1) gordon

82. Favourite movie: the whole lord of the rings

83. Favourite actor: does matt mercer count??? bc i lov that boi

84. Favourite cartoon: steven universe

85. Favourite teacher’s name: Elizabeth, Matthew, Karl (karl is like my college tutor but shh he still counts) 

im not tagging ppl bc i am a lazy boi

[screaming-bigbang]

Scarred - A Big Bang Mafia AU

Running won’t stop the past from catching up...

CHAPTER 1  - Masterlist

Genre: This chapter is just fluff really with a bit of suspense and suspicion. Group: Big Bang. Pairing: Seungri x Reader. Warnings: None atm really Word Count: 3,499 (sorry, not sorry) I’m setting the story, ok, I’m sorry if this chapter isn’t all that. But it will get better, I have big, big, angsty plans!

It was a night of celebration for you. You had just gotten confirmation that you got the job you’d recently applied for so you decided to go out and have a few drinks. You had moved to Korea only a few weeks ago and without a job, you didn’t have many friends but that was fine by you. A few drinks by yourself wasn’t anything new.  Besides, new friends would come with the new job, you hoped.

 You didn’t know if it would be weird or not but you’d decided to go for a few drinks in the place where you’d gotten the job. It was at a place called Club Lies, one of the hottest clubs in Seoul at the moment.

 You left your apartment, dressed nicely in a black dress and a pair of flats. Wearing heels wasn’t really your style, opting more for comfort as much as possible while still keeping your outfits stylish.

 You waved to your neighbour, Song Oh Juk, as you got outside. He was standing in his garden watering his rose bushes and he smiled when he seen you.

 “You’re looking very nice this evening Miss. _____!” He said with a wave. He was in his 70’s, you guessed but he was the closest friend you had here. He’d become almost like a father to you since you met when you first moved in, helping you navigate the streets of Seoul and adjust to your new life. He lived alone but he was kind and welcoming. You often spent time helping him about the garden and talking about life. “Special occasion?” he asked.

 “I got the job!” You told him, stepping towards him and smiling. He whooped, dropping the hose into the bushes and starting to clap.

 “Congratulations! That’s great news. I knew you would.” He was grinning and you thought it was endearing how happy he was for you. He seemed genuinely pleased.

 “Thank you. I’m going out to have a few drinks to celebrate. I start on Monday.” You told him. He laughed and nodded.

 “Go, have fun and stay safe.” He bent to pick up the hose. You thanked him again and waved as you walked away. When you glanced back he was still grinning and you thought you heard him humming a trot as he continued watering his plants. That man had an amazing garden and he took pride in it.

 The club wasn’t far from where you lived, it was only about a fifteen minute walk. The night was calm and the air was still a bit warm even though summer was fading fast. You were looking forward to seeing Club Lies up close for the first time. You had only seen pictures on the website when you had applied. You had just gained the position of HR Manager there and you were excited to see what the premises were like.

 You could hear the music pumping as the club came into view when you rounded the corner. There was a short line and you praised yourself for coming early, not daring to imagine what the length would be in another hour or so. The bouncer stopped you and held out his hand as you stepped up to the door. You flashed your ID and he nodded, waving you in. The music grew in volume, as did the people, the closer you got to the bar.

 As you stood waiting for your drink you looked around, taking in the people and the décor. There were so many people ranging from young groups of men and women to older people in suits and skirts. They were probably here on a staff night, which showed you that the club didn’t cater to only one specific type of clientele.

 That diversity was obvious in the décor. It was all very modern but with a slight vintage twist, the vibe allowed anyone to feel comfortable. You imagined that if the style from the 20’s had survived until now, this is what it would have morphed into.

  Everything was black and gold, adding an air of seductive mystery on top of everything else. It was alluring and made you feel as though you were in a place where anything could happen. It was fantastical in a dark way.

 There were large mirrors held tightly to the wall by ornate black frames. The wallpaper was black and gold with a beautiful twisting design. The couches were large, chaise lounge style, the backs of which rose and dipped like ocean waves. The patterns of their fabric ranged from matching the wallpaper to being a golden velvet framed by black wood. The chairs were golden with ornately designed backs and all the tables were black glass tops sitting on extravagant gold legs that ended with clawed feet, like an expensive bathtub. There was a stage to the left, framed on either side by heavy golden curtains, that stared down at a large dance floor that was crowded with jostling bodies.

 After collecting your beer, you found yourself drawn towards the dark space beneath the large, black staircase by the door. You imagined the staircase led up to another dance floor and bar. You couldn’t really see from here as the lighting upstairs was much dimmer. You noticed the bouncer standing at the bottom checking people who were going up the stairs. Your initial presumption was that he was manning the front door from the inside but you noticed that, after he turned one man away, he allowed a couple with small golden tickets to ascend. It seemed a little strange, but perhaps upstairs held events or required a special membership to gain access to it.

  Under the stairs, where you had been going, there sat a water fountain that was barely illuminated by the tiny bulbs dotted here and there. It was black marble and a statue of a strong looking man sat atop it. In one hand he held a piece of rope that stretch towards his neck, you realised it was a noose. In his other hand he held a bag that seemed to be spilling dozens of tiny, golden coins from a hole in the bottom. You frowned a little. It seemed a little menacing and dark.

 “What’s a lady like you doing here by yourself?” you jumped a little. You hadn’t noticed anyone beside you while you had been staring at the statue. You turned to your left to find who had asked the question. You were greeted by a man who looked to be in his late fourties. He wore a strange grin on his face and you knew he had probably drank more than he should have. “Would you like to dance?” He asked, stepping closer. You backed up a bit and smiled, hoping to placate him.

 “No, no. I’m ok, thank you.” You said softly. You didn’t want to deal with this. Not tonight, not in here of all places. It wouldn’t look good for you to be the centre of any trouble here only two days before you started working.  

 The man advanced again and you struggled to stop yourself from rolling your eyes. You had to play this quietly.

 “Do you think you’re too good for me?” he growled. You shook your head and smiled again.

 “Not at all, it’s just I have a boyfriend and he’ll be here soon. Now excuse me, I’m going to the women’s room.” You turned around and tried to keep an even pace as you followed the signs towards the bathrooms but you caught your reflection in one of the large mirrors and noticed the man trailing behind you. He clearly hadn’t believed your lie, or else he didn’t care. His persistence irked you.

 “Fucking scum...” you growled internally. It always escaped you how men like this just couldn’t take no for an answer.

 Suddenly you spotted a man by the bar. He looked about your age. He was well dressed, from what you could see, in a nice suit but it wasn’t fancy enough to draw too much attention to him. You looked him up and down and could tell he was a bachelor, there was just something a little lonely about him despite his confident stance. He was probably out trying to pick someone up but he had an approachable air about him, his stance was loose and open, so you went out on a limb and steered yourself toward him. You looked in the nearest mirror that lined the wall and noted that the drunk man was still following you.

 “Hunny, hi! Sorry to keep you waiting, I didn’t realise you would be here so soon.” You said, placing your hand on the small of his back and leaning in to kiss his cheek so you could whisper “I’m so sorry please just roll with it for a minute.” His gaze slipped over your shoulder and he placed his hand on your waist, smiling.

 “Sure.” He said quickly catching on and kissed your cheek back. It seemed believable and you gave an inward sigh at how astute he was.

 “Bitch.” The drunk man said, storming passed you to the far end of the bar. The younger man’s grip on your waist tightened as he glared at the other’s back.

 “I fucking hate pricks like that.” He said. His head turned back towards you as his hand left your waist and found his beer . Your eyes met and you were able to properly take in his features now. His dark hair was nicely styled and his demeanour was much softer up close. He had large brown eyes but they were underlined by dark circles that somehow only enhanced his looks.

 “I’m so sorry for coming over like this.” You said removing your hand from his back and coughing into your hand in embarrassment. You looked down, noting that he was actually wearing black, ripped skinny jeans and a white t-shirt under his blazer. He grinned, noticing the direction of your eyes.

 “What? I don’t like to dress too formally.” He said and you laughed.

 “That is the true definition of fancy-casual, right there.”

 “You don’t like it?”

 “I didn’t say that.” Your eyes met again and he smiled. You found yourself grinning back stupidly. “I’m sorry.” You said again, glancing across the bar and noticing the other man had gone from there. “I should leave you to your night, thanks for helping me out.” You turned around to leave until you felt a hand around your wrist and you turned back around.

 “I’m Seungri.” He said. “Stay with me until you finish your drink, then let me walk you home. I’d feel more comfortable that way. Otherwise I’ll spend the rest of the night wondering if that creep caught up with you again.” You smiled at his kindness and stepped back to the bar, placing your drink on the shiny, black marble of the countertop. “Are you sure I won’t be intruding?” He smiled back at you and leaned comfortably against the bar.

 “I’m not waiting for anyone, if that’s what you’re getting at.” Seungri said, cocking an eyebrow while a small smile played on his lips. You cocked an eyebrow back and smiled coyly before you spoke.

 “I didn’t think you were.” You said, deadpan, and his face fell in mock outrage. Seungri placed a hand on his chest and looked around as though searching for someone to leap to his defence.

 “I am offended! The ladies love me!” He said, fighting to keep the smile off his face while you covered your mouth to hide your laughter. “I mean look at me, I’m clearly good looking and sophisticated with an attractive air of mystery.” He wiggled his eyebrows and you couldn’t hide your laughter anymore.

 And so the night went on. One drink led to two, lead to three and as ample as the supply of alcohol was, so was the banter. Sometime later, you checked your watch and tipped the ash from your cigarette with a sigh, exhaling a plume of smoke.

 “I should probably go home now. I don’t want to walk back too late.” You said. Having been careful not to drink too much, you wanted also to be careful getting home. It was 1AM which meant that half of the pub folk were probably on their way home while the other half staggered towards the clubs.

 “I’ll walk you back, don’t worry.” Seungri said, stubbing out his own cigarette before clasping the button on his blazer. You looked at him sceptically, wondering if he was thinking you were easy and he caught your eye. He raised his hands up in surrender and laughed, clearly embarrassed.

 “No, no. Not for that!” He said, looking awkward. “I mean, usually, yes. But no. Not tonight.” You feigned offence as you dropped the butt of your cigarette into an empty can sitting on the windowsill outside Big Bang. Seungri blanched again, he seemed to be getting more flustered with your teasing. “Not because it’s you. I mean, you are pretty, I wasn’t trying to say you weren’t-“

 “Oh, so now I’m just a pretty face, huh?” You cut him off, deciding to push the joke. He was kind of cute when he was trying to dig himself out of a hole, you thought. You started to walk away in the direction of your apartment, zipping your jacket to fight off the small chill that hung in the air. Seungri quickly followed you, stumbling over his words as he went.

 “No, I wasn’t saying that either, you’re actually pretty cool! It’s just that I promised to make sure you got home safely earlier and I meant that innocently.” He stopped talking as you burst out laughing and he caught on to what you were doing. “Yah!” He said, voice trembling from suppressed laughter and maybe relief. “That’s not cool.”

 You were too busy laughing to notice the change in Seungri’s demeanour as you walked on. Instead of being a step behind you as he had been with a relaxed posture, he was suddenly walking a step ahead, his back straightened a fraction and his eyes glued to something across the road. By the time you’d registered the change, the new rigidness in his jaw and the strange coldness in his eyes, he was pulling the hood of your jacket over your face and placing an arm around you, speeding up your pace.

 You looked across the road. There were a group of men standing outside a fast food joint, talking loudly. You couldn’t see what was wrong at first, but then you noticed him. He looked innocent enough but reading people was something you were usually quite good at and something about him made him stand out. It was the fact that despite his relaxed appearance, as he leaned against the wall just behind the group taking a swig from a can of something, there was a tense set to his jaw and he wasn’t peering at you exactly, you’d definitely call that a glare. A sudden smirk distorted the tight line that had been his mouth and something about that smirk sent a chill down your spine. You couldn’t see his face right but there was something familiar about the way he smirked at you. Seungri sped up even more.

 “Seungri?” The tone of your voice had more of a demanding nature than the confusion with which he had expected. Seungri’s eyes found yours and he examined your face with a strange intensity. You couldn’t find a word to describe it. Suspicion, maybe?

 “Don’t worry.” He said, throwing his head over his shoulder and relaxing a bit. You had made two turns down to a small side road since and you guessed that the coast was clear from the slight drop in his shoulders. He let you go and chuckled, his expression softening. “Ah, that was awkward. You saved my ass big time! That was a colleague of mine, Ahn Jae Suk. He tried to set me up on a date with his sister a few days ago but I made up an excuse, saying I had a girlfriend. I guess he doesn’t have to be suspicious anymore. And I suppose that makes us even. What are the chances we’d both have the same problem on the same night?” He chuckled some more but you could see that something was off. The story seemed a bit too detailed and there was a slight nervous twang to his laugh. You couldn’t place exactly what it was about his features that was giving him away but you decided not to press it. You didn’t know him enough to get into his business anyways.

 You stopped outside your apartment building and turned to face him.

 “Thanks for tonight.” You said, smiling. He smiled back at you.

 “Not a problem. But there is one thing.” He said and you nodded for him to go ahead. “I never did catch your name.”

“Oh.” You said, a little surprised. You couldn’t believe you’d been so rude, but you kind of applauded the fact that he hadn’t brought it up much earlier. You would have felt a bit more awkward then. “My name is _____.”

 “Well it was nice to meet you _____. And may I say that your name is as pretty as your face.” Seungri said, reminding you of your earlier teasings. You rolled your eyes and he chuckled. You bid him goodnight and he told you to stay safe before turning and disappearing into the night.

  You were wondering whether you should be relieved or remorseful that you two hadn’t exchanged numbers as you stood outside, searching your purse for your keys. He had certainly made for some good company and you couldn’t deny that he was both nice and attractive. You found keys at the bottom of your bag, of course, and subsequently dropped them as you heard your name being called. You pressed a hand to your chest wherein your heart was beating a mile a minute and looked up to find Song Oh Juk waving at you from behind his rose bushes.

 “Oh Juk-ssi! You nearly gave me a heart attack!” You scolded. He merely chuckled and waved you over so you bent to collect your fallen keys and went to see what was wrong. Something could only be wrong at this hour of the night, but he seemed too relaxed. Oh Juk was always much harder for you to read, though.

 “You’re too young for that, _____-ah!” He chided. “Someone came with a parcel for you earlier. I forgot to tell you when I seen you this evening but I spotted it by the door about an hour ago.”

 “Tell me you didn’t wait up just to give it to me. It’s so late, you could have waited for tomorrow.” You felt bad, he needed his sleep. Oh Juk just shook his head, smiling calmly.

 “My son rang from abroad so I had to stay up to speak with him. I just got off the phone when I saw you outside. I couldn’t remember your apartment number so I offered to keep it for you, your address only has the apartment building on it.” You took the parcel from his outstretched hand and thanked him sincerely for his troubles.

 “Remember it’s apartment 22, so you don’t have to be troubled if it happens again.” Oh Juk laughed and told you it was no trouble before he said goodnight and turned to go back inside. You examined the address which was handwritten, under the dim outside light. Something nagged at the back of your mind about the script. It was familiar but you couldn’t place it. You shivered and the hairs on the back of your neck stood up. You felt as though you were being watched but when you looked around the parking lot all you seen was a cat sprinting into the shrubbery on the opposite side. You turned and headed upstairs, shaking off the foreboding sensation.

 What you didn’t see was the man standing in the darkness under a tree off to your left. He lowered his camera and stuffed it into his bag before turning and leaving.

 In your apartment, you slipped out of your shoes by the door, a sudden wave of exhaustion hitting you. You dropped your bag by the sofa, threw the parcel on the table and pulled off your coat, dropping it on top of the package. You went to clean off your makeup and get ready for bed, deciding to deal with the parcel after but by the time you were done you were so tired that you forgot about anything that wasn’t your bed. You crawled under the covers falling to sleep almost immediately while the strange package with the familiar handwriting lay forebodingly beneath your jacket. _____________________________________________________________ Chapter 2

[toadcircus]

i was tagged by @beastiebros 

rules: answer these 85 statements about yourself, then tag 20 people.

1. last drink: apple and blackcurrant squah boiii

2. last phone call: I called my friend for the whole like, half hour journey to uni bc he was on his way home for a week, which I didn’t realise and im sad bc I didn’t see him all of last week bc the security in the building he lives in don’t like me and always come up to spy on us and I am not about that at all

3. last text message: “same about to get in the lift” to my friend who I was meeting to get the bus to uni with, last monday

4. last song you listened to? “no light no light” by Florence and the machine

5. last time you cried? Yesterday bc I get overwhelmed by simple tasks

6. dated someone twice? Lmao I’ve barely dated anyone let alone one person twice

7. kissed someone and regretted it? Hoo yeah awkward shit

8. been cheated on? nah

9. lost someone special? Yeah I guess?

10. been depressed? Not been diagnosed with anything but I do get uhh depressive states I Guess

11. gotten drunk and thrown up? Yeah lmao

12. fave colors: I like primary colours and also dark blue

in the last year have you…

15. made new friends? Yeah tons bc uni

16. fallen out of love? Mmm unfortunately not

17. laughed until you cried? Yeah a couple times

18. found out someone was talking about you? Yh I heard my flatmate mention me once and misgender me so now im like knife eyes

19. met someone who changed you? Lots of people

20. found out who your friends are? Yeahh? Idk what this means

21. kissed someone on your facebook friends list? Uhh yes I think like 4 people

general

22. how many of your facebook friends do you know irl? Most of them JNFDSKJGHS im not gonna count im lazy

23. do you have any pets? Used 2 hav a dog but all dogs go 2 heaven. Also I love that film that film was my whole childhood

24. do you want to change your name? legally yh I want 2 change it 2 richard but im lazy and clueless about how to do it

25. what did you do for your last birthday? I went 2 the pub with uni friends and it was super super sweet

26. what time did you wake up today? Like 11/12 bc im a disaster

27. what were you doing at midnight last night? Probably watching jane the virgin

28. what is something you cant wait for? To get on T BINCH and also to move into my new house in july

30. what are you listening to right now? Nothing I cant listen 2 music and write who do u think I am, superman???

31. have you ever talked to a person named tom? That’s my brothers name KJGDKGD

32. something thats getting on your nerves? How dirty the kitchen is

33. most visited website? Def tumblr like 100% im always here its lame

34. hair color: mousey brown, what it is now

35. long or short hair: short

36. do you have a crush on someone: we’re sorry! You must purchase the premium toadcircus package to unlock this answer.

37. what do you like about yourself: I like that I can make people laugh, I like my nose, I like that I think in a bit of a squiffy way compared 2 other people bc sometimes its cool

38. want any piercings? I want 2 get my ear pierced maybe and get a little ring that’d look cool I think. Maybe my bridge pierced idk

39. blood type: dude idk

40. nicknames: Richard (Im putting my actual name as a nickname bc its used more as a nickname than my nickname is), ricky, richardio, ricardio, rich…. Charlie called me Bichy once I think, which is a hightlight

41. relationship status: single as HELL and sad about it

42. zodiac: libra

43. pronouns: he/him

44. fave tv shows: always sunny, peep show, that mitchelle and webb look, jane the virgin, crazy ex girlfriend, dirk gently holistic detective agency, Brooklyn 99… I like a lot of shows, more than this. I just cant remember them

45. tattoos: none atm but I want some

46. right or left handed: right

47. ever had surgery: no

48. piercings: septum

49. sport: rolling fat doinks

50. vacation: I want 2 go to Amsterdam

51. trainers: what

more general

52. eating: I wish you didn’t have to eat and instead you’d just take these like, nutrition pills and that eating was like, a hobby or something. Bc I don’t like it much altho I boredom eat quite a lot so im just a hypocrite. Oh I just saw the next question, u mean what im eating right now gkjfkgd nothing

53. drinking: squash

54. im about to watch: not the latest crazy exgf ep, but the one before bc I got half way thru apparantely and just stopped and I forgot what I watched anyway so im gonna rewatch it

55. waiting for: to get deeper into my new projects. That sentence doesn’t make sense but that’s the questions fault, not me

56. want: I want 2 do a bong hit and play more half life 2 TBH

57. get married: hopefully someday

58. career: hopefully drawing shit. Commission me

which is better

59. hugs or kisses: literally anything

60. lips or eyes: eyes. I notice eyes first like the colour and stuff but good lips r essential (don’t hold me to this if I date someone with weird lips)

61. shorter or taller: I don’t mind, being with someone shorter would make me feel taller but then we’d both be really short idk… taller probs

62. older or younger: no one older than like… 26 atm I think. Or younger than 18 obviously but I think maybe actually 19 bc that’s uni age. So is 18 idk idk

63. nice arms or stomach: arms

64. hookup or relationship: relationship 100%

65. troublemaker or hesitant: troublemaker

have you ever

66. kissed a stranger: yeah hoohoo

67. drank hard liquor: yeee

68. lost glasses: I don’t have glasses

69. turned someone down: yeahh

70. sex on first date: no

71. broken someones heart: hhhhhhh probably (this is dabbens answer but it was legit what I was going to type)

72. had your heart broken: yh binch probably

73. been arrested: No and hopefully never amen

74. cried when someone died: yeah ofc

75. fallen for a friend: yeah

do you believe in

76. yourself: kind of! I believe I can do fun big things hopefully but only if I stop being so scatty

77. miracles: I suppose

78. love at first sight: kind of yeah. I think sometimes you can tell when you’re attracted to someone when you first see them and sometimes you can fall in love with them also

79. santa claus: nop

80. kiss on a first date: sure if he’s cute and im feelin it

81. angels: sort of

other

82. best friend’s name: I don’t like saying people are my best friend because im always scared that they wont see me as their best friend when I see them as mine so I just have friends but some friends that I see and think about more often

83. eye colour: blue

84. fave movie: idk there r 2 many 2 choose

85. fave actor Armie Hammer is hot shit and I want 2 look at him all the time.

i’m gonna tag

@dreamsweetinseamajor @groovy-vampire @ickyyy @furcoat

[olla-village]

Language biography -My Chinese adventure

1. Here I am 18 years old

So, here I am, 18 years old confused monolingual… Finished my community college just to realize that I hate spending so much time in front of computer screens, writing code at nights, powered by coffee and greasy junk food.

 18 years old meant that I was an adult, at least both I and law of the country agreed on that… I could buy cigarettes, alcohol and tickets to other countries even if my parents were against it. I didn’t need to ask anyone’s permission. It felt like freedom. Freedom comes with responsibility, but that’s the whole different story.

 2.  It was time for something big It was time for something big.But for what? When I was younger I liked to travel to nearby cities by busses and hitchhiking. It was a mixture of being lost, on purpose… and finding something new after every trip. Traveling was my form of learning and escaping from problems at the same time.

 This time I was really lost.No direction. Hitchhiking for a week didn’t help. Yes, I tried. I needed a new medicine. I tried, like many of us nowadays, to find the answer online. Almighty Google knows it all.I didn’t know what to ask. So I decided to look at my bookmarks.

There was a website I read for more than 4 years. Or so. I guess. It is called Magazeta. They also do a podcast. Not some goofy cast, but LaowaiCast. They discuss everything about China through the eyes of laowais, speak Chinese fluently and seem to have all kinds of fun there in the mysterious country.

3. I decided to join them

I decided to become one of them, join this strange tribe. To become a laowai. A proper living in China laowai. And not an expat, who just hangs out with westerners, but a Chinese-speaking laowai. I figured out how much money I needed to study Chinese for a year, found 2 jobs that’d allow me to earn enough in 3 months. June, July and August. I became a taxi-driver, and began to work at a construction site. Not bad for a guy who majored in programming, eh? At least, there were no computers.At all. No screens, not even sunscreen. None of that, nada! I kept researching my new dreamland, China. Almighty Google told me that for my budget and for language learning Top2 options were Tianjin because Mandarin there is very standard, but it is cheaper than Beijing and Shenzhen, the most Mandarin-speaking city in Guangdong. I chose Shenzhen. It’s tropical and close to Hong Kong. I watched many Hong Kong movies as a kid and was interested in Kung Fu.

After working for 14 hours a day for 3 months I hated my jobs enough and was ready to fly to my dreamland. So I did. I kissed my parents and my girlfriend good bye and started my new scary laowai adventure. 4.  I didn’t learn Chinese before went to China I didn’t learn any Chinese before I went to Shenzhen because I read online that it’d destroy my pronunciation forever. So I followed advice of someone Almighty Google led me too. I was proud that I would’t learn broken pronunciation. Stupid. After a few, quite a few days of trains and planes, I arrived in Shenzhen. It was another planet. Humid, incomprehensible, green, terrifying and extremely friendly. No Kung Fu skills required. Beginner friendly.

I ordered a service of an interpreter who would meet me in the airport and help me to get to the hotel, the first and the last time in my life. He was quite surprised when I asked if he has a knife or at least keys when we got to an ATM. It was hard to explain why I sewed my bank-card in my pocket, but he understood that in my country people like to pick pockets. Not the best advertisement for a country, but I was determined and didn’t want to let thieves destroy my plan. 5.  Soon I didn’t go to lessons at all So I got a dorm room, figure out where I can buy pillow and started to learn Chinese in class, but soon I found that I was not able to say tones right and I was late for my writing classes on purpose, to skip that annoying dictation where I’d make a mistake in every character. Soon I didn’t go to lessons at all. I joined Wing Chun classes and hung out with other laowais and Chinese folks instead. My roommate also taught me some Chinese, especially survival kind of stuff or how to ask for cigarettes on the street, his teaching skills were particularly awesome when he was drunk. Sometimes when I met my classmates in campus they asked me why I gave up on learning Chinese, I said that I don’t go to classes, but I still learn Chinese. I hated that one guy who said he learns Chinese just to read stuff and that he doesn’t care about speaking since there’s no reason to talk with Chinese people, what a prick! I don’t hate him anymore. At that time I called my approach “just learn”. It meant learning without homework and tone drills. 6.  Laowai life was fun I spent 4 months like this. I was so busy practicing wing chun, playing football, buying fake shoes, hanging out and exploring Shenzhen that sometimes I forgot to eat for 2 or 3 days. That’s why I sometimes stole my roommate’s sushi that he’d get for free every night. Thanks to well-cooking people who lived in the girls’ dormitory, I was never hungry. I think I looked so skinny they just wanted to feed me on the level of instincts… Long story short, laowai life was fun, colorful and cheap for those who lived in campus. At least, it was for me. For 4 months or so. And then it was over.  The End. Game over. I had to go back home for what I call family reasons. I didn’t finish my 1 year Mandarin course. It was also hard to get my deposit money back, but I did. It was really good for my Mandarin skills. My WeChat was full of contacts. I packed all the tea, gifts I got from strangers in my friend’s dorm and stinky clothes. I was and wasn’t ready to leave. I told my friends that I’d be back for sure, which I doubted.

 The END or To be Continued? That is the question. At that moment, I connected language to living in that country. 7.  I missed China and Chinese Don’t live in China = don’t learn Chinese. So, obviously I gave up learning languages and broke up with my girlfriend. Luckily, I found a lazy job where I could play my phone almost all the time. For several months I just lived in my memories about China and felt some hole growing inside me. I didn’t understand where it was coming from. One cannot go and live abroad and then come back to the farm and pretend it didn’t happen. It is going to change anyone, no matter how hard this naïve person is trying to ignore it. I needed to fill that emptiness. I tried a few things. They didn’t work. Until one day I saw an ad about learning Chinese just by listening. Like literally sitting on my bottom, which I was already doing, I was even getting paid for that, and learning… Chinese! The language of my dream/nostalgia land. I was nowhere near fluency at that moment. Upperbeginner at best. I missed China and Chinese Pod became my new way to connect to the land of rice and cuteness. That emptiness inside was filled. Except for … it wasn’t. But things were getting better, way better. I felt alive again. Or maybe it was that nice Turkish coffee I was drinking while I listened to Chinese Pod? Then I thought that just listening, even good listening was not enough for that hole somewhere inside me. So I thought I need… people! But I still wanna sit on my bottom so if I find people online, I don’t need to spend extra time after job. Multitasking for the win. 8.  I started my new job I found hellotalk and some similar apps with similar names. Hellotalk was the best one, but at that time it was slow, sometimes a message was sent 4 hours or a day later, so I stole people from there by asking their whatsApp number. I started to realize that the missing ingredient in my life, besides people, was Chinese language. I also realized that escapism and dreaming about faraway lands was not an ideal solution. In search of a perfect combination of people and languages, I decided to join a university. I wanted to study Chinese, but they told me that they have teachers, but not so many students want to learn Chinese. Interpretation was not available that year. What a weird year! The only choice was teaching English, which sounded tasty at that moment, since I also wanted to change my job at that moment. I asked for all the details about exams and stuff. It was nice except for the fact that that stinking girl tricked me and I was preparing for master degree entrance exams instead of what I really needed because I was the first one who wanted to join that university that year and she didn’t really know what to tell me. It was a surprise, but I passed it super well, like top2 or something. Probably because I prepared for something way more difficult, thanks to that stinking girl. My score was a big surprise for me, since I’ve never been a top student. At the same time I started my new job. I was a tutor. Teaching kids English.1 on 1. Learning my major by practice. It was awesome. Language became my bread and peanut butter. 9.  I found my jam. It was olla. But I still needed jelly! Peanut butter sandwiches are fine, but they’re nothing like peanut butter jelly ones!

That Sunday I planned to have some rest for my brain and body. So I got a lot of nesquik and scrolled mindlessly through countless web pages full of memes and stupid videos. Until I saw an ad for a language learning app on some page where people who learn English hang out. In comments I read that most users were Chinese. These comments were written in a negative tone, but for me it was pure treasure. Here, I found my jam. It was olla. By that time, hellotalk and its clones were deleted and forgotten for a long time, but I gave olla as much of my precious SD storage and space on the screen as it wanted. I liked it for no particular reason, as I thought back then. Now I do understand that other apps couldn’t provide this kind of sense of community as olla did. It was alive, lively and vivid.

10.  It was addictive

It was a perfect place for me to practice my languages. My way to do it was to provoke people, often it meant arguing with them. I learned to be provocative in many languages. I also learned to pretend to be from different countries. The most difficult one was Australia. Controversy and gossip were my fuel. It was not just any drama, it was international. Better than Argentinian TV series! I tried many ways to catch attention, I hope that psychologists and my future employers don’t read how much of an attention seeker and drama queen I was. A few times I deleted an app and said it was shitty publically, while actually I loved it but was busy studying in my university and knew that I don’t have enough will power to keep studying while olla was still on my phone, it’d be too much of a distraction. It was addictive. Before I deleted it, I posted my email on olla plaza. Jessica was worried or surprised or something of this nature and wrote me an email. She helped me to deliver my messages to my biggest language buddy. It was one directional isolation and made me way more mysterious than I’ve ever been before. Because of me being such a d... dumbass, many people hated me, but many liked me. Many mentioned that they missed me, I knew it through gossip and screenshots. Imagine the size of my ego at that moment… After a while, I realized what other apps lacked completely and why they didn’t deserve my storage and screen space. Sense of community + drama, gossip and controversy (people crave it) + many people from different countries in the same room. Cultures don’t merge this way in 1 on 1 conversations. Other platforms also have many people from different countries,but they try to find you a match, a perfect partner. Perfect is boring. In olla people didn’t match perfectly and it was beautiful. It was colorful. It was my home anywhere I went. 11.  I couldn’t stay like this forever I couldn’t stay like this forever. All of us eventually get boring, also known as serious. I was a university student after all. Gotta be pretentious and stuff. They call it professional. I started to read a lot of SLA (Second Language Acquisition) research, just like people read news or comics. As a result, I realized that my“just learning” intuitive approach to languages was actually consistent with research. Even gossip and drama. But mostly community and compelling input. It is kind of the same thing.

Not only I pretty much filled that emptiness by languages, I also came to the point where my experience met science\research. Like yin and yang.

12.  I started to plan to get back to China After that, I decided to get my life together again and I started to plan how to get back to China. I didn’t get any good idea how to do it, but I started to save money and told my classmates and buddies that most probably I will go to China again. Fake it till you make it works every time. I also told some folks on olla about my plan. I really do consider olla to be my hometown and I did find real life friends there. I think it’s safe to say that I spent more time on olla than with my real life friends. I also spent a lot of time with my offline friends, but they can be less available than something tiny in my cheap phonethat opens the door to my friends. Wait, olla is real, so it’s also real life. People there are real. Language learning there is real as well. Wrong dichotomy. So I spent more time in my olla hometown than in another one because it felt warmer and closer.

My best language buddy who already became my friend decided to help me make my second laowai life happen much faster than I imagined and invited me to join olla team. I pretended that I am so cool and need to think for 1 day or so, like it is not a big deal, when in reality it was dreams come true type of deal, at that moment I was already packing my small backpack and getting ready for the second chapter of China. This time it was Guangzhou.

To be continued.

 You can read my language buddy’s story here

(my story https://wordpress.com/block-editor/post/ollaolla.home.blog/40)

 Bear

2019/10/1

[victakestaipei]

WEEK 4 RECAP: “Power, Chase Bank Complaints, and TYPHOON SEASON”

As I stated in my previous posts, I’m really really really sorry for the delay here on my WEEK 4 RECAP. Granted, my weeks have started to become pretty routine; But I still like to keep my word with you guys and blog every weekend, despite the topic being my humdrum weekdays.

Anyway, let’s get to it:

Monday: 

My monday was one for the books, honestly. I stayed in bed all day long blogging and doing homework and just being a bum. It felt awesome. We got in from the Philippines early this morning, and I didn’t actually get in the bed until about 4am, so I took the liberty of playing hooky, and NO RAGRETS! 

I only left the house to get breakfast with Bunny... We went to this breakfast joint by our house and I splurged on an egg scallion pancake, a breakfast sandwich, orange juice, and a hash brown patty. It was bomb, but who am I kidding, it’s always bomb. I didn’t end up doing my homework until later in the evening, which ended up backfiring because I had SO MUCH HOMEWORK TO CATCH UP ON. It was actually pretty insane, but I still got it all done. For dinner Bunny and I picked up some potstickers from the place right outside our dorms that you all have already heard SO much about because we literally go there multiple times a week. Like I said in my intro... HUM. DRUM. 

Tuesday:

Today we went to the bakery before class, I had my daily tea, and barely survived the 3 hour period. After class we went to the gym, and I did leg day today. My legs were shaking so much, it was like they had turned to jelly over the weekend. I think this is due to the fact I took 4 days off🙄 but I managed to get my mile down to 8:30 today!!! Y’ALL!!! BASK IN THE GLORY!!! Progress!!! Slowly but surely!!!  

After the gym we went to a restaurant on the Shi Da market for lunch, and ordered fried chicken curry with rice and veggies. It was super good, and only 100 NT! (About $3.35 US).  

Afterwards, we went home and I took the longest shower ever, and then a nap (I really really needed it). I got up just to do homework, and then crawled back into the bed. I found a website that lets me watch Power online so that I can FINALLY catch up to the new season. BLESS UP!!! I started watching this show over the summer, but then I got caught up with other stuff so I never caught all the way up. I last left off on Season 2 Episode 7, but I heard the new season 4 is BATSHIT CRAZY so I need to catch up PRONTO. (Also, can I just take a minute and say I freakin’ hate Angela??? Ugh. Tasha is a ride or DIE and Angela comes waltzing in and I’m just mad as hell. Ghost is such a punkass. I literally cannot deal. Let me shut up while I’m ahead before ya’ll comment and spoil something for me.)

...He still fine as hell though... :-’)

For dinner we went to the Gong guan night market to get Gua Bao (remember those pork hamburger things from my “WEEK 2 RECAP” post? “Gua Bao? Gua BOMB!”) and egg scallion pancakes. We didn't leave the house until after 11pm, so alot of our options were closed at that point. 

Wednesday: 

I actually got up on time to head to the bus, and I was WELL RESTED!! Wow, such a rare occurance. In class I got a 95% on my dialogue quiz today. I’m getting used to pulling these A’s, but our lessons have gotten significantly harder so I find myself reviewing the characters twice as much as usual. Ew.

At the gym I did chest/shoulders/abs. I wore the wrong leggings to the gym today... I wore my normal black leggings instead of my work out leggings, so I didn't do cardio because I didn't want to be all sweaty in my normal cloth leggings... I don’t know I'm weird I guess?? But my ass was looking PHAT at the gym since I had normal leggings on hehe

After the gym Bunny and I tried this Italian spot by our school. They have a lunch menu where you can get a dish AND a side for 99 NT!!! (3-4$ US). What a deal!! I ordered pesto penne pasta and pumpkin soup as my side. Pretty plain, but still super yummy!

After lunch I went home to shower and do my homework and relax. Bunny and I got dinner around 9 because we were STARVING more than usual. I guess the soup and pasta didn’t do it for me. We hopped on the bus to head to Gong guan, but we missed our exit so we ended up taking the bus all the way to our school to go to the Shi Da night market there. MIND YOU I LOOK LIKE A CRAZY CAT LADY. I twisted my hair up and put on two bandanas after taking a shower and putting product in... and I had on a long flowy printed dress I got from the Philippines. Needless to say I looked crazy, in my shower flip flops. We got the soy sauce noodles to-go, with green beans, udon, cabbage, broccoli, and tofu. I also got to chat with my mom on skype tonight which was nice, after struggling to get her speakers to work (for like 20min) so she could actually hear me. I stuffed my face while on the phone with her, and she cheekily said “how come whenever I get you on skype you ALWAYS EATIN??” Then proceeds to laugh hysterically and say “you gonna regret it!! It’s gonna go straight to your hips!!!” ......So charming *eyeroll*, gotta love her lol.... 

I went to bed super late because I had the migraine of a lifetime. I think it might have been because I didn’t get a tea this morning... Caffeine headaches will be the death of me.

Thursday: 

I woke up with the same migraine, and was moving slow because I was so tired and my head was banging!! It was like the drummer guy from Whiplash was putting in WERK on my forehead. I was about 10 minutes late to class... I tried to rush because I knew we had a test in class, but I just couldn’t bring myself to get out of the bed on time. Kokoro (the Japanese student in my class) and I rode on the same bus to class, he was late too because he had gone clubbing last night! On a Wednesday??... Turns out, it doesn’t matter what day of the week it is here, it’s lit at the club every night. 

Class was good today. It didn't feel like it dragged as much. But, I was starving the whole time because I didn’t have time to grab some food before strolling into the class. Our teacher referenced the upcoming typhoon today! Meaning, it will be pouring, dumping rain all next week, starting this weekend. There will also be fierce winds. She told us how many people stay home and grocery shop a lot beforehand because transportation and a lot of businesses are closed. For those of you who don’t know, a typhoon is basically a hurricane. I'm not mentally prepared. Our teacher said that typhoon season lasts three months, starting in August. I’m nervous about the food aspect because we don't have a fridge in the dorm so I'm about to be eating perishables all week... canned beans and rice? God, I’m not excited. But maybe class will be cancelled a few days this week? A girl can dream!!!

In the gym it was leg day yet again! My legs weren’t half as shaky as tuesday so that’s good. I ran a 8:45 mile, after almost DYING on the first treadmill I hopped on. I was adjusting the speed and the treadmill skipped and I almost flew the fuck off. My arms were flailing and I let out this loud/awkward noise and everyone was looking at me. I caught my balance and didn't die, but I definitely quietly turned off the machine and moved to another treadmill shortly after. I think that messed up my mojo because while I was running I was constantly paranoid of the same thing happening on the machine next door. 

After the gym the three of us went to Shi Da market. I pulled out cash from the ATM but was pretty bitter about it because I looked at my bank statement and my bank (Chase Bank) charges a $5 FEE WITH EVERY NON-CHASE ATM WITHDRAWAL that I make... THAT ADDS UP?!!! Are u kidding me??! I’M BROKE AS IT IS CHASE, CUT ME SOME SLACK!!! I'm so salted. I hate Chase Bank. They suck ass. Do you know how many WITHDRAWALS I’VE HAD TO MAKE WHILE HERE??? I need a Charles Schwab account because it seems like they’re the only bank not trying to PLAY US.

I tried a new place for lunch where they had these small fried dumplings. I would show a picture but I inhaled it so fast that I didn't get to. So here's a picture of the box...hehe

I also got some more dragonfruit today    V   so so good.

After the gym I came home, showered, and relaxed. I ended up napping around 8 and woke up at like 10:30pm... I did my homework in class so I'm probably just going to eat something small and crawl back into the bed. I got a banana at the Family Mart convenience store and some apple juice and a pack of yan yans. Yan Yans are those pretzel stick things that come with the chocolate dip and they’re super good?? I’m sure you know what I’m talking about. I talked to Karis on the phone, and then Paris shortly after that. It was SO GOOD to see Paris’s face and hear his voice after so long. :-’) I miss you roomie!! I knocked out again after hanging up with him.

Friday: 

This morning I woke up to a power outage on our Gong guan campus. If this is any tell of how the rest of the weekend/next week is going to be with the upcoming typhoon, I am not ready.

I got a 99 on my quiz today... I. AM. HURT. It was so so close I could taste the perfect score!!

Today I brought my umbrella to class because the typhoon starts this afternoon/evening. Class breeezed by because there was only 7 of us today. It was back day at the gym, and it was great! I’m definitely going to be sore. And I did some booty workouts on the floor afterward. After the gym we went to Gong guan market (the one by our house, not the Shi Da one by campus) to get some food and look for a SIM card for Bunny’s phone (so that she can have a local phone number and consistent data). We stopped and got pork buns and mango before heading home. 

When I got home I finally was able to decompress from the long week. I relaxed for a few hours before leaving the house at 10pm to go to the grocery store with Bunny. When we got to the grocery store, it was about an hour or so before closing, and it looked like the apocalypse hit. All the shelves were sweeped, but we got some food to get us through the weekend.... Like wine and rice and potatoes and eggs and snacks. After the grocery store we headed home to relax and shelter away from the upcoming typhoon.

Saturday: 

I made breakfast this morning after finally leaving the bed at 1:30 pm. I made eggs and papas!! - An old fave. (Jaylene I miss you). I also cut up some apples too to eat with peanut butter. It was good, but the papas weren't up to par because I only had two seasonings... Sad day. 

The rest of the day was spent in bed, watching Power and being a couch potato. At 8:30pm our power went out again, but only for a few minutes. It was getting pretty crazy outside at this point. You could hear the wind howling and tree branches swinging and water pushing its way through the cracks in the closed windows of the bathroom/bedroom. 

At 9pm is when I spilled my Pink Moscato on my laptop. HOW COULD SOMETHING SO SWEET BETRAY ME SO HARSHLY?? My computer immediately died after letting out this depressing noise and became completely non-responsive...and so did I. I was on the brink of a meltdown. To keep from succumbing to panic, I put my phone on DND and went to sleep at 9:30pm. I literally knocked the hell out. That’s the best way to avoid problems/conflict right? Take ya ass to sleep.

Sunday:

I woke up by 4:45/5am, and reality set in. I spoke to my mom on the phone, and she helped calm me down and rationalize the situation. I was a mess. I still am a mess. I cannot afford a new computer right now, and I'm nervous about going to get it fixed because I don't want to be taken advantage of, and I wouldn't know the difference either way... I'm clearly foreign. But I have 8 years of memories and information stored on this laptop, so I'm not letting it go without a fight. I called a few places that claim to fix Apple products on Google, but none of them turned up with any real answers. So after 12pm, I ended up going to the Apple Store at Taipei 101. I took a quick shower and brought a bunch of stuff I figured I might need: my laptop, external hard drive, a flannel, umbrella, towels, a hat, and snacks. I've never been outside when there was a typhoon brewing so it's better safe than sorry right? As soon as I walked outside I could tell something was off. There weren't a lot of people bustling about, and there were countless fallen branches and leaves covering the sidewalks and roads.

I hopped on the bus, and then the MRT, to head to Taipei 101, the tallest skyscraper in Taiwan. I had this lingering thought in the back of my mind... let me illustrate... “Is it a good idea to go to the tallest sky scraper in Taiwan when there’s a hurricane with strong winds/ pouring rain just waiting to happen?”... All i could picture is the structure toppling over with all of us inside and causing this huge disaster, similar to something straight out of an Apocalyptic movie like 2012.... Anyway, I arrived just before 1pm, and come to find out, the Apple Store is CLOSED. I’m salty. All the lights are on and the store would otherwise look open, it's just that there's no one inside. It's completely empty. Even all the devices on display are powered on. It was kinda errie... Like those paper towns the military sets up, where it looks like a normal town and everything, just no one lived there...  I looked online (again) and went to their actual website where it says today (and only today) they open at 2pm instead of 11am. So I just waited around the mall for an hour until they opened. I found a bench and an outlet so I was just sitting here chilling....Glad I brought my snacks. ;)

When the time finally came to go back to the Apple Store, that overwhelming feeling came rushing over me again. I ended up crying like a PUNK to the customer service lady. So annoying!!! Ugh. I was a fragile mess. I spoke to two different managers who both spoke perfect English, and they helped to reassure me that they would try their best to help me. I have to come back tomorrow for a walk-in appointment with the Genius Bar. Fingers crossed they can help me, or at least retrieve/save my information. 

I left Taipei 101 feeling pretty defeated, so I got some McDonalds on the way home... I know it sounds silly but I needed comfort food and something that felt like home. I ordered the filet o fish (which I crave daily), with fries and a coke. This was not my best moment, but the whole meal only cost 95 NT!! (Less than $3.20). CRAZY! 

I came home and that’s when I started reading my book that I keep mentioning, “You Are A Badass” By Jen Sincero. It helped me to feel better and get into a better frame of mind. 

I took a break from reading to help Bunny make curry for tonight’s dinner. It was BOMB and came out fairly well if I may say so myself. I’ll definitely be making curry more often when I come back to the States.

I finished reading my book just before calling it a night. SUCH a good read I cannot stress this enough!!! I learned so much from Jen’s words and she adds funny stories/anecdotes and the way she describes things is just so relatable. If you have a chance to read it I definitely recommend!!!

I went to sleep pretty late, I was laying in bed catching up with Jay (via text) and other friends from back home. Before closing my eyes, I decided to practice meditation, which is one of the key concepts in the book. I wasn’t very successful the first time, because it was hard to clear my mind and just be still. I know it takes practice, so I’m going to try to dedicate time every day to meditate for at least 5 minutes! Feel free to join me on this challenge, it’s supposed to reap unprecidented benefits!

Also, please pray that when I take my laptop in tomorrow to the Apple Store they can fix whatever’s wrong!!! I need all the prayers I can get. I’m speaking it into existence now: MY COMPUTER WILL LIVE. IT WILL RISE AGAIN. IT WILL POWER ON.

Until next time,

xoxo

[eddiecranes]

I got tagged earlier today by @cheapskate-bleeding-queer​ to answer 92 questions (actually there are some missing, you might wanna look into that) but now that I’m on my laptop and not in class I can do this for real

Last:

1) Drink: Diet Pepsi 2) Phone call: With my sister in Portland (also I guess I technically talked to her cat too) 3) Text message: To my dad 4) Song you listened to: TLSP - “Miracle Aligner” (btw thanks Dean) 5) Time you cried: Probably last night bc I am a mushy goblin

Have you:

6) Dated someone twice: No 7) Kissed someone and regretted it: In order to do that I would have to have kissed someone in the first place so nyet 8) Been cheated on: Nope I am confident that I have not been 9) Lost someone special: Yes, multiple times 10) Been depressed: If you followed my old blog you know that I d e f i n i t e l y have 11) Gotten drunk and thrown up: I’ve never been drunk in the first place but I’m sure that when I do, I will be nauseous enough to hurl

List three favorite colors:

12) Red 13) Violet 14) Cobalt blue

In the last year have you:

15) Made new friends: Yes, lots :) I was just thinking about how yesterday was the first anniversary of me starting college and gosh there are so many great people in my major 16) Fallen out of love: Tbh I don’t think I was ever in love until a couple of months ago so no I haven’t fallen out of love 17) Laughed until you cried: I’m sure I did at some point yeah 18) Found out someone was talking about you: Lol yeah 19) Met someone who changed you: Mhm, a few people :) 20) Found out who your friends are: I guess, idk this is a really ominous-sounding question but I suppose I realized that some people didn’t deserve my friendship bc they made me feel bad all the time (in short, yeah?) 21) Kissed someone on your Facebook list: *see 7*

General:

22) How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: Nearly all of them, but for some reason I’m friends with my sister’s friend who may have been her professor(?) and I have never once met or talked to him 23) Do you have any pets: Yes, four sweet babies I would die for 24) Do you want to change your name: Not my first name 25) What did you do for your last birthday: Got hella good pasta and also a froyo cake 26) What time did you wake up: Around 6:15 AM 27) What were you doing at midnight last night: Talking to @leerockers​ about...was it the weird Trotsky movie 28) Name something you can’t wait for: My music editing class tomorrow afternoon!! 29) When was the last time you saw your mom: Monday morning 30) What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: My looks, for sure 31) What are you listening to right now: Bonzo Dog Doo Dah Band what the fuck am I doing here is any of this even real 32) Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: I am sure I have, it’s a very common name? 33) Something that is getting on your nerves: My school not being able to get things done gggggggg 34) Most-visited website: This one

Random info:

35) Mole(s): One on my cheek, one on my calf, might have more 36) Mark(s): I don’t think I have any birthmarks 37) Childhood dream: I really wanted to be an actress 38) Hair color: Light brown 39) Long or short hair: Short 40) Do you have a crush on someone: *looks around* *whispers* Don’t tell Tegan but...I kind of have a crush on him, like? I think he’s p cute and stuff, but don’t tell him 41) What do you like about yourself: Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhh 42) Piercings: Only my ears 43) Blood type: O positive 44) Nickname: Barbara is my favorite it’s my suburban mom persona 45) Relationship status: I’m in one, congratulate me boys 46) Zodiac: Cancer 47) Pronouns: She/her 48) Favorite TV show: Psych, although I’ve been watching a lot of The Office lately 49) Tattoos: None yet 50) Right or left handed: Left 51) Surgery: Never 52) Hair dyed a different color: Yeah I guess it’s dyed red but it’s fading 53) Sport: No and I’m offended you even suggested, the audacity 54) No 54? 55) Vacation: What 56) Pair of trainers: No

More general:

57) Eating: Nothing atm 58) Drinking: More Diet Pepsi, I am Going To Die 59) I’m about to: Get into my nighty-nights 60) No 60 either 61) Waiting for: Godot (jk I’m not really waiting for anything) 62) Want: Stability 63) Get married: Yes :) 64) Career: Musician/songwriter

Which is better:

65) Hugs or kisses: Never experienced the latter so I cannot properly answer this 66) Lips or eyes: Eyes <3 <3 <3 All about the eyes 67) Taller or shorter: Shorter 68) Older or younger: Definitely older 69) There isn’t one wth (also haha) 70) Nice arms or nice stomach: Umm idk, I like cute squishy tums and tbh I don’t really care about arms all that much 71) Sensitive or loud: Sensitive 72) Hookup or relationship: Relationship obvs, I mean it feels p good and I don’t imagine a hookup feeling all that great 73) Troublemaker or hesitant: Either one

Have you ever:

74) Kissed a stranger: *see 7* 75) Drank hard liquor: No 76) Lost glasses/contact lenses: No bc I don’t have to wear them as far as I know 77) Turned someone down: What idk 78) Sex on the first date: No I have done none of those things you just mentioned in that sentence at all 79) Broken someone’s heart: Not that I know of 80) Had your heart broken: Ehhhh sort of, not to the point where like I was in tears but there has been slight disappointment (wait actually it broke my heart when I found out one of my favorite musicians was a DICK TO WOMEN) 81) Been arrested: No 82) Cried when someone died: Yes ofc 83) Fallen for a friend: I have had a crush on a friend before buuuut as it turned out he had a boyfriend but I’m really happy where I am right now and I’m glad I didn’t end up with him bc he voted for an anti-vaxxer lmao

Do you believe in:

84) Yourself: looooool no :( 85) Miracles: No, I am not lead singer of the band Hot Chocolate 86) Love at first sight: No, I mean that wasn’t the case for me 87) Santa Claus: Not anymore 88) Kiss on the first date: Why not? 89) Angels: No

Other:

90) Current best friend’s name: Ummm I don’t think I have one best friend 91) Eye color: Blue :P 92) Favorite movie: Harold and Maude

Fuck idk who to tag, you can just do this and say I tagged you

[robertdowneyjjr]

nursey the tech disaster and dex the apple support guy: an au

a conversation between me & @brandnewfashion

(interspersed with random hockey commentary)

kayytx

au where nursey keeps having IT trouble and every time he goes online to use that quick chat help service (bc he doesn't want to call. that's awkward af) he gets dex as the service guy

brandnewfashion

oooooh

nice!!!!!!!!!!!!

TELL ME MOER

kayytx

i'm trying to decide what products nursey's using that he keeps having issues lmao

i feel like fandom consensus states nursey is a mac guy?

brandnewfashion

yeah i can't see him not using them

kayytx

so basing off of my experience trying to update my software for FOUR HOURS at staying up until 3am bc of that shit ugh

the first time he has to contact apple support online he's trying to upgrade his OSX to the latest software, but it keeps stalling a quarter of the way through

so nursey borrows chowder's laptop to go on apple's website for support help and dex answers

and legit, that shit takes...four hours

brandnewfashion

lol i wouldn't know

sounds annoying tho

kayytx

it's supposed to be only half an hour but my laptop just decided to be a little shit

but anyway

in between dex telling nursey what to do, and nursey following instructions and waiting for his laptop to show some progress

they start chatting

bc nursey is bored and it's late at night and there's nothing else for him to do, especially since his computer isn't working

imagine nursey like, suddenly thinks of a few verses for a poem and types them in the chat bc he couldn't find anywhere else to write atm

and dex is like ??????

brandnewfashion

yesss

kayytx

YASSS HABS WIN

ok anyway

brandnewfashion

GOOD

kayytx

so that obvi leads to a convo where dex asks what nursey does and nursey talks about being an english major

and dex tells him about doing comp sci and working for apple part time

brandnewfashion

FINALLY THE FLAMES SCORED

and yes good i'm liking this au

kayytx

idk how many call locations there are in the US though so i'm trying to figure out where dex is based rn

like i'm kinda tempted to have him live in nyc

but i don't work for apple so idk how true this is

brandnewfashion

dude that'd be cool though? and nursey could be like "YO I'M FROM THERE" and dex, who just started school there, could be like "ok is there any place to get decent ____ bc i haven't found one yet"

kayytx

yeS EXACTLY

so nursey recommends some like hipster coffee places and one day dex remembers this convo and goes and at first he's like, what the FUCK this place serves out of mason jars NO

but he tries the coffee and he honestly thinks it's liquid cocaine so he keeps going back

brandnewfashion

lolllll

kayytx

anyway so like after three hours of chitchat and apple support nursey's computer finally boots properly and installs the update

so they say goodbye, it's been really fun talking to you, thanks for the help, etc. etc. and sign off

then three weeks later nursey's iphone spazzes out

and the nearest apple store is an hour away and he just doesn't have the time to go there, wait another hour for the genius bar to have an opening, and then go back to campus

so he goes online to apple support and clicks the chat option

and it's dex again

dex recognizes him from his apple ID, which usually never happens but bc they had such a good convo last time nursey left an impression

and so again in between helping out nursey he's just like, oh HEY i went to that place you told me about!

so nursey tells him about more places to visit

brandnewfashion

ok ben bishop is in net for the kings (no surprise) but he's wearing his lightning mask and it's really throwing me off

kayytx

god that's so weird

brandnewfashion

ANYWAY

what places does nursey tell him to go toooooo

how long does tihs go on before they get the opportunity to meet?????

kayytx

OKAY OK so

idk i think this happens like four or five times?

apple products arent THAT terrible lmao you can't have that many issues with your products

but nursey's a disaster so

he manages to fuck up something every few weeks

and like after the third time he enters the chat dex's coworkers recognize him also and they just pass him off to dex immediately hahaha

brandnewfashion

lmaooo

kayytx

oh FUCK stars tied the game

anyway

brandnewfashion

RUDE

kayytx

honestly after the fourth time nursey goes online with an issue about his ipad's storage issue or whatever dex is just really tempted to give nursey his number bc for the most part he's been able to solve his problems without referring to the resources at his desk

OH SHIT STARS IN THE LEAD

brandnewfashion

EXCUSE ME WHAT

FUCK U STARS

kayytx

UGH

anyway so yeah dex wants to give nursey his number and nursey wants to ask for it, but they both know the chats are monitored and that's just highly inappropriate and nursey doesn't want to get dex fired

so they both resist but like

it's kinda killing both of them

brandnewfashion

D:

kayytx

yeah like they're both p sure they're gonna die before they ever meet bc they're Dramatic af

BUT!! THIS IS FIC!!! and i love them and want them to be together so DO NOT DESPAIR

nursey goes back to nyc for winter break

and he doesn't want to be all cooped up at home with nothing to do

so he decides to go out, find some inspo, write a bit

AND THEN this suddenly becomes a coffee shop au

nursey goes to that mason jar hipster cafe to get some work done

but in the middle of writing his computer shuts down and he panics REALLY LOUDLY

and what??? dex is THERE???

brandnewfashion

LOL

AMAZING

HOW CONVENIENT

kayytx

R I G H T

he had the day off and was also there to work on some freelance coding projects he has on the side and in the middle of coding he hears this really loud person screaming at his laptop and he's like, what the FUCK

so he looks up and sees nursey doing SOMETHING with his computer. he's not even sure what

and in teh cafe there are like three other people with their laptops out, but dex is the closest and he looks the least busy (nursey is wrong. dex is the busiest, he just looked up at the wrong time and Eye Contact happened and now he's stuck)

so nursey goes over to him and he's like, "yo bro can i borrow your laptop to go on apple support and get some help"

bc that response is just like ingrained in him now. anytime something happens he just. goes on apple support

dex, being the lil shit he is, just goes, "have u tried turning ur computer off and on again"

brandnewfashion

HA

kayytx

nursey: it won't even turn ON dex: maybe its out of battery nursey: it's plugged in??? do u not see it????? dex: maybe your cord doesn't work

dex just. doesn't want to help

he does enough of that at work

brandnewfashion

lollll

kayytx

but nursey is really annoying and he figures the easiest way to get rid of him is to help him so he's like, ok fine i actually work at apple i'll help you

brandnewfashion

wow

the pens are gonna lose

to the STARS

kayytx

.....that's so depressing

brandnewfashion

they got too fucking cocky

ugh

kayytx

D:

brandnewfashion

anyway

dex helps him?

kayytx

dex helps him!

and meanwhile nursey's chattering on and on about how this is the first time someone's actually physically helped him with his laptop bc he never goes to the genius bar even though he probably should and he's terrible with technology and things always just die on him so he always has to get help from online support and it's kinda funny how he always gets the same guy who helps with his problems and it's actually kinda nice talking to him, and he kinda really likes him, but he doesn't think they'll ever meet bc why would that ever happen right? hey maybe dex would know him since they're both working for apple? but what are the chances?? surely there are thousands of people who work for apple

and like all this time dex has sorta just been tuning him out while he works on nursey's computer but he catches a few things here and there

and he's like

wait

rewind

dex: holy shit nursey: what? what is it, is my computer really dead this time? dex: you're derek nurse nursey: umm? yes?

and for a sec nursey thinks that he's just somehow become notorious within apple support center circles or something bc he's gone for help so many times

but then dex introduces himself and he's like OH HOLY SHIT

brandnewfashion

NICE

kayytx

and like sometime during nursey's little ramble he mentioned how he thought dex is funny and really nice and seems like someone he'd like to date and of COURSE dex totally heard all of that

dex: so. you think i'm funny. and you want to date me huh? nursey: ...well i mean maybe? dex: okay well just do you know just because we're both in a coffee shop right now declaring our feelings this ISN'T our first date okay bc i refuse to have our first date be one where i fix something for you again nursey: oh so YOU HAVE FEELINGS FOR ME TOO?

brandnewfashion

HA

kayytx

dex: well yeah. i wanted to give you my number but i couldn't do that without a monitored chatroom nursey: i wanted to give you my number too! dex: well? technically? i have your number? because it's in our systems dex: but i didn't want to seem like a creep if i'd just randomly texted you

but anyway they finally exchange numbers like normal people and nursey Officially asks dex out on a date

but then internally he's struggling bc he basically already gave dex a list of all the best places in nyc and now he has nothing to impress dex with lmfao

brandnewfashion

HAHAHAHA

kayytx

they end up going to brooklyn for smorgasburg bc you cant really ever go wrong with that

wait jk that's seasonal so it wouldn't be open for winter break LMAO

brandnewfashion

oh gosh they're gonna become a disgustingly sweet long distance couple

kayytx

yeah nursey's fucked

YES THEY ARE

they're so gross honestly

brandnewfashion

they always have shit going on

there's ALWAYS something hapening haha

kayytx

and dex's coworkers notice that this dude hasn't been on the chat in a really long time??? and they kinda start feeling bad for dex bc they knew he had a bit of a crush on nursey lmao

brandnewfashion

ok but then dex has them all over to meet his "new boyfriend" and they all walk in on nursey screaming at his laptop and they're like "OH"

kayytx

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

and at this point dex is already at the fondly exasperated stage and he's like, jfc nurse you should just give up on technology altogether

[inloveswan]

I was tagged by @jollysailorswan

A. Age: 22

B. Biggest Fear: BIRDS. They’re the most disgusting creatures and they creep the hell out of me tbh.

C. Current Time: 12.38 am

D. Drink you last had: Tea. How typical of me lol

E. Everyday Starts With: not wanting to leave my warm and comfy bed

F. Favourite Song: I don’t think I have one atm. I’ve been listening to the same stuff on repeat for so long I’m kinda bored of everything rn.

G. Ghosts are real?: nah I don’t think so

I. In love with?: Kilian Jones, Captain Swan, Victuri. Because I’m incapable of having feelings for real human beings. Fictional characters are better

J. Jealous Of?: people who have their lives figured out (I’m keeping Venia’s answer it’s just spot on yup)

K. Killed Someone?: Someone? No. An insect? Probably.

L. Last Time You Cried?: A month ago maybe. I sometimes burst into tears in the middle of the night it’s weird.

M. Middle Name: I’m not sharing this info cause it’s a part of my password for many websites

N. Number of Siblings?: one younger brother

O. One Wish?: a good life where life doesn’t turn into a cycle of going to a work I hate and coming home to sleep only.

P. Person I Last Texted?: Deniz. She’s one of my closest friends. I was trying to convince her to go ice skating with me. She accepted lol.

Q. Questions You’re Always Asked?: “What are you gonna do when you graduate?” Oh for fuck’s sake pls shut up

R. Reasons To Smile?: Chocolate, cats, dogs, travel, OTPs.

S. Song Last Sang?: History Maker because apparently I’m obsessed with YOI lol

T. Time You Woke Up?: LATE. I can’t remember what specific time it actually was but I remember my mom screaming in my ear to get up quite perfectly lol

U. Underwear Color?: black

V. Vacation Destination?: Fethiye for the summer but I might add something in between. Like a small trip to a historical town before that. I personally wanna see Çatalhöyük A LOT so maybe that. I want to do a bit of a Europe trip too like either to Greece or Transylvania but both USD and Euro are rocket high so not atm *sigh*

W. Worst Habit?: procrastinating (I’m also keeping that one lol)

Y. Your Favourite Food?: PASTA

Z. Zodiac Sign?: Sagittarius 

I’m tagging: @swanshope, @captainhand, @oncepromised, @seethem-dancing

[szopenhauer]

Who will you be spending Christmas with this year? no idea, I’d like to spend it with my parents but dad might work at the time and also sister can visit, I’m not even sure if I will be alive at the time nor if I want holidays as I have no money nor can’t eat much anyway

Did you go to high school with your current best friend? no Have you ever wanted to be vegetarian or vegan? maybe vegetarian but not a vegan for sure Do you park your car in a garage, carport or just in a driveway? we have no car

Have you seen any extended relatives in the last month? from afar Do you take part in paying the bills for your household? I don’t :( Have you ever properly listened to classical music? Did you like it? you mean if I listened to a live orchestra? not really Do your parents know how to text? not my mother Do you text your parents often? I text my father at least once a day when he’s at work What television channel do you watch the most? none anymore What will you do when this survey is over? take a bath and go to sleep, I play choices in the meantime, I might listen to music yet  What’s the weather like today? there was a thunderstorm How do you usually celebrate New Years? I was listening to music with my family, we had special food and then we looked at fireworks through the window drinking non alcoholic champagne  Is the place that you’re in right now quiet or loud? it’s quiet

What was the last thing you took a video of? what kind of friend I am on snapchat or smth on tik tok that I set as private

What’s something that used to really stress you out, but doesn’t anymore? school as I no longer attend it Do you prefer to be around introverted or extroverted people? I’m an introvert and I prefer NOT to be around people  Have you ever been somewhere where you didn’t fluently speak the local language? never but sometimes I go to the mall and there are ppl speaking russian instead of polish  Have you ever dated someone from a very different socioeconomic background? yep Were you born before or after the collapse of the Soviet Union? year after How often do you go grocery shopping? about every second day or third? If you got pregnant the 1st time you had sex, how old would the kid be now? it wouldn’t be born What was your last received text message about? M. wishing me good night Have you ever lived in a small community where everyone knew each other? my town was a bit like this when I was a baby Are you a procrastinator? huge What was the last thing you said out loud? BYE or smth like that

Have you ever worked over 50 hours in one week? I haven’t

Have you ever studied abroad? neither Do you have any medication that you keep with you at all times? sorta List three things that you need to get done in the next few days? take my dog to the vet, get my examinations results and give them to my gastrologist, go on a date, do grocery shopping etc. What’s something that’s much more difficult than a lot of people realize? being me What’s your opinion on couples ‘staying together for the kids?’ ugh... What was the last website you were on, before this one? Google Do you ever lose track of what day of the week it is? who doesn’t Were you raised by both of your parents? If not, then who raised you? could say so, my dad was busy often but I also had my grandma around Have you ever spent over $50 (€43) on a bottle of wine? - Have you ever locked your keys in your car? I don’t get it, how is that even possible? :o What season do you wish lasted longer? summer How old is the last male you texted? 60+ How old is the last female you texted? 28 Have you ever ‘taken a break’ in a relationship? If so, how did things turn out? could say so

How many times have you ever ridden an elephant? 0 but I want to What do you think about Lord of the Rings? cool

Do you have a lot of clothes hangers in your house? shitload Have you ever been in a Latin class? floristry  Have you ever had bubble gum stuck in your hair? once Is there any pet hair stuck to your clothing? I don’t think so Have you ever watched The Gremlins? nah Is your cell on charge? it is indeed What do you think about rainbows? ... Are you wearing anything on your head right now? am not Do you own a pet spider? I don’t Do you like mouthwash? I dislike it Do you use green pens? very rarely Are there any fake tattoos on you? none Can you roll your belly? a bit Is there a rocking chair in your house? there isn’t Have you ever gone to a Monster Truck show? would like to someday but it’s not necessary Have you ever been kicked in the throat? punched/slapped/hit  Do you like the song “Barbie Girl”? ironically Do you own a feather boa? blergh Do you wear ribbons in your hair? used to have this special decoration that I made myself - it was a ponytail made out of ribbons and my friends’ mom or grandma was calling it Krakowianka Do you use cheat codes on video games? motherlode How long has it been since you last slept? over ten hours Is the sound on your laptop or computer turned off? it’s on How many keychains do you own? too many lmfao Magnets? several Do you own anything with a peace sign on it? doubt it When is the last time you wore shorts? this month which is new/weird to me Do you like elevators or escalators? use them when I need to Is there anyone in the room with you? I’m alone When is the last time you pet an animal? today

Is it windy outside? who knows Have you ever met a dog named ‘Spot’? I called one this way

Do you usually wrap gifts or just put them in a bag? give them without packing or anything  When was the last time you were given jewelery as a gift? this year If you look out the window closest to you - what do you see? darkness Have you ever used crutches? for “fun” If Willy Wonka invited you to live with him, would you? ewww, creepy Do you own a pair of pink shoes? mhm Have you ever been in a tree house? sadly not Have you ever been outside in freezing cold weather with no jacket on? ha! it reminds me of the time we’ve been using hot glue for couple of hours to make floral decorations in class and we all started going crazy like on drugs and we wen outside in T-shirts in a freezing cold winter time to finish projects and we didn’t feel anything pfft - I wasn’t sick afterwards :P The last time you said “I want it” - what was it that you wanted? not sure what was last but I want health constantly if that counts What color are your sunglasses? they’re not colorful Are you picky about how your clothes fit? I like ‘em oversized Would you ever flirt with somebody in front of your parents? slightly Would you ever move to China? what for What material are the pants you’re wearing made of? cotton

How long have you had your current mattress? years Do you usually pay with cash, debit card, or credit card? cash always What do you usually drink with breakfast? I drink water an hour after breakfast

Are you the type of person who can make friends with just about anyone? me? r u kidding? What’s your least favorite time of day? morning because of waking up but sunrises are pretty  How many burners does your stove have? 4 When you go to a restaurant, do you prefer to sit at a booth or a table? table Which room of your house is currently in the greatest need of cleaning? *shrug* not mine  When was the last time you shipped a package? uh oh I don’t even remember  Have you ever made a homemade pie? with my mom How old is your oldest cousin? don’t ask me

Do you ever have binges that last for hours, watching YouTube videos? not that long

Have you ever recorded yourself doing a cover of a song? ^^”

Are there any movies out there that basically make you want to puke? Gummo *someone once told me it reminds them of me and I wasn’t able to watch half of it as it was so disgusting and that comment feels like one of the worst offensive shit anybody ever told [about] me

Are either of your parents laid of from work at the moment? retired

Any secrets you’d never tell anyone? No matter how close they are to you? no secrets like this

Have you ever told a secret on one of your friends you promised otherwise? you got me

Do you consider yourself a promiscious person? I’m an asexual but recently... Look to your left, what’s the first blue thing you see right now? there’s nothing blue on my left side atm as there’s a window 

Do you know anyone who has AIDS? What about yourself? no one that I know of 

Has anyone ever mistaken you to be a member of the opposite sex? plenty of times

What’s one thing in your room you would die if your SO found? I wouldn’t die, I might be embarassed if anything

Does your school have a swimming pool? Or no? my schools didn’t have swimming pools

Do you prefer cappuccinos or frappuccinos? I only tried cappuccino before  Would you rather swim in a lake or the ocean? lake Are there any plants in your home? omg yes What food does honey go best with? I liked yoghurt with honey when I was a child Have you ever carved a pumpkin? less than 5 times Do you love seeing frost hanging off leaves in the Winter? I like it on windows only Have you ever reread a book? no? Would you ever like to own a chandelier? not crystal one 

Do you have any religious symbols in your home? bunch What religion do you identify with, if any? Christianity If you could have a small garden in your backyard, what would you plant? you mean vegetables?

Do you enjoy those tins of butter cookies? yeah Do you own any art supplies? I gave away most of them Do you prefer writing in pen or pencil? pen How many notebooks do you own? Are they all filled? I own lots of filled and empty notebooks

Are you currently sitting on your bed? I’m not

Did anything tend to make you extremely happy today?  nope

What month is it?  August

Do you know where the remote to the closest television is located or not? I know

Name one interesting fact about yourself that people might not know about? I hate The Nanny Affair on Choices and play it only to get diamonds

Do you ever have to write down a phone number to remember it, or not? every single time

Do you know anyone who has man-boobs?  many men have “boobs” *in middle school we had a guy who they were calling Pamela (Anderson) because of that

Do you know anyone who constantly puts themselves down?  that me

When was the last time you had a piece of cake?  yesterday or day before

Do you know anyone who has their septum pierced? Does it look painful? not personally

Do you think some famous people just shouldn’t be famous at all?  lots

Has anyone ever complimented you on your singing? Did you believe them? once in primary school and I think they tried to flirt with me but I believe they were lying or maybe they just tried to make fun of me? 

Has anyone ever kissed you in the rain? Did it seem romantic at the time? no thx

When was the last time you listened to a genre of you music you despise? in public, it was loud so I couldn’t help it

How satisfied with life are you at this exact moment in time? Why is this? no comment

[nh0betsm-blog]

What is the difference between term life insurance and a 30-year life insurance renewable after 30 yrs.?

What is the difference between term life insurance and a 30-year life insurance renewable after 30 yrs.?

What is the difference between term life insurance and a 30-year life insurance renewable after 30 yrs.?

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SOURCES:

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Looking to get a I know it may up for driver s ed, forced to buy Obamacare, or insurance company that for a new driver? have a polish worker excuses, and because my two and a half year because its likely or a 91 toyota the make, model, and i can drive any have my own car. lease it instead of would be the career just parking them until psychologist for mental/emotional reasons. test and trying to insurance is high and male on a new went to a broker I figure it would I want some libility Anyone know of an a 26 year old? Under warranty. Anyone have My semi-annual auto insurance Printer, And a few more affordable is your day, so it s not for accidents and sickness. failure to signal increase any other companies that - need help.. :D and I have only How much does it with single information input and the rate will (like it does in after I got speeding .

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What are car insurances my renewal quote from crowns, 6 extractions, 2 insurance, and with the or would you save, What exactly is a the price of the and he needs to money out of their give you payout like motorcycle and get my the cheapest car insurance as soon as we will they pay for blue book is on an affordable health insurance currently 2400 for 12 the insurance once I go on your insurance? able to just leave driver insurance to finish will affect my insurance without insurance, whether their work. Do they basically until that same time drive my car , $82,000 dollars!!!! WHAT SHOULD wondering about how much insurance, which is under is only a Kia know there are probably days now having very find my own medical name they wouldn t cancel dont have insurance though! my insurance cover her drive their cars with has reached the end 2003 Jetta and the today that it would and I am looking .

Asked by: hyphenga-ga I for a short period false claim on my insurance go up from the hospital, because I a temporary third party am a student and cars for a 16 I m going to get lapse at all? If other type of insurance to be a resident Insurance Premium Tax (34.10), fictive private jet renting policy and do not employee - I would york city can anybody sort out their insurance? insurance agency. Such as to Florida, miami actually part of my budget. get points on your quotes starting from 4000, Obama waives auto insurance? am female, turning 26 going to be 17 500 pounds a year around $2,000 with around honda pilot 2008 honda would I be covered? to us already went looking for a good i checked yesterday for for it myself. When this would be great. Average motorcycle insurance cost the self employed. Is is higher than the the price of the AARP but any idea would be very helpfull .

If I have my insurance. This is for trouble, and really i for (1) insurance (2) what if we can t not paying her physical i get cheap car we have to get have been looking for insurance through my parents it is a pain cost tenant insurance any car insurance help.... little damage. I don t for 17 year old? Of Auto Insurance Sponsored for running stop light, guess full coverage is have a child. I used to have so damage with my auto policy which cover both much insurance would probably buying a one-year renewable told to wait until me but i think and am trying to healthy, never smoked and omissions insurance in california? over 20 years ? so i was wondering to get my car Because I skidded into do this? Does the record. My question is,is on their car insurance any good? pros ? years old...and i m a in their cars rather for a 11 hyundai one x with insurance .

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How much money is motorcycle insurance for a 17 year old?

How much money is motorcycle insurance for a 17 year old?

I m 17 and need to save money for a vehicle and I m leaning towards a motorcycle because they are relatively cheap and fuel efficient. How much is insurance though?

BEST ANSWER: Try this site where you can compare free quotes :4insurequotes.xyz

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[thekalebox]

Retrospection time

Hi all, so I’m writing this the day before I head back out to Boston! I wanted to start off with practical tips that hopefully don’t seem obvious, because they certainly didn’t to me when I first got here. So without any further ado:

Housing

Don’t make the same mistake I did and get yourself a super expensive place via airbnb because a) you can reserve it in advance and b) you didn’t know any better. There are tons of oneroomtels and goshiwons around, you’ll find somewhere, don’t worry. If you feel brave enough, you can just check out some places online (goshipages.com! a lifesaver) and kakaotalk with the manager about the rooms, availability, etc.The place I eventually moved to was unusually cheap at 300,000 won/month, but it was also very tiny and not the most comfortable. The budget Light gives you is a good measure of about how much you should be looking to spend - around 400,000 to 450,000 won/month will get you a decent, dorm-like room with the must-have amenities. Life in Seoul is exhausting, so if you’re anything like me you’re going to do a lot more resting at home than you expected, so be aware of that when housing shopping!

Being able to check places out in person is great - the pictures online are, as you might expect, not always entirely accurate or representative. If I were to do this summer over again, I would book a cheap hotel or airbnb for maybe ~4 days after I arrived, and then once in Seoul go check out some places in person and get moving. 

Oh, and having a place near a subway station is really a must. Having lived both near and far from one, I can say that having one near to (as in, 5-10 minute walking distance) stop makes things so much easier and encourages you to go out and explore way more than if you have to take a bus to the subway every time. Obviously you’ll probably want said station to be only a few stops from your school’s station. I lived at Yesol Livingtel in Nakseongdae, one stop away from the SNU stop, and it was great - it was close enough that I could take the bus straight to school and back if I wanted, which is good for SNU especially being so far from its own subway stop - but I had that easy subway access too. 

Cell phone

Before I came here I convinced myself that I could live on wifi alone. NOT SO. I WAS PUNISHED FOR MY HUBRIS. The wifi here is ubiquitous, yes, but only for people who already have established, contract-based phone plans - which, if you’re staying for one term, you will probably not be getting. If you have a friend who’s a Korean citizen who can help you out, I think you have a lot more options for getting a data plan. For me, though, I just got a 90-day prepaid sim from Trazy, which you can reserve online and pick up at a few different places in the city. Topping it off once you run out of data seems like a bit of a pain, but I didn’t have to for my trip and was able to make it last until the end by pretty much only using it to look up directions, kakaotalk, and other necessary stuff.  Trazy definitely isn’t your only option, though, so if you want more internet access shop around. Just be mindful that a lot of phone plans are geared towards Korean residents and so might require that you be Korean or have an Alien Registration Card, which one-term fellows probably will not have.

The weather

The summer is hot. Bring an umbrella and a bottle of water with you every day everywhere, no matter what. Nothing new here.

Transportation

As soon as you touch down, get a T-Money card from a convenience store and load it. You can only load it with cash, so stop at an ATM first. Don’t be afraid to put a lot of money on it, though - you’ll use it, trust me! Transportation in and around Seoul is so easy and convenient that it’ll be gone before you know it. Make sure to always carry some cash on you, too, just in case you run of TMoney so you won’t be stranded. You can reload it at the kiosks in subway stations or at certain convenience stores, depending on where you bought it. Note that if you run out and have nowhere to reload it, you can pay cash to take the bus (and you don’t need exact change). You can also pay cash in taxis if need be, though it’s much more of a hassle than using TMoney and you might not be able to get change. Plus, it’s hard to predict how much a taxi ride will be, as it varies based on traffic and time of day. Moral of the story is, you should always keep more than you really need to on your card and carry at least 5-10,000 won in cash with you just in case. Nobody wants to have to walk 3 km home in 100 degree heat!

Money

On a related note, I had never traveled abroad before and so I didn’t know how foreign transaction fees worked and what cards would be accepted. I have a Discover credit card that has no foreign transaction fees, and it was accepted pretty much everywhere here (with a few notable exceptions - see the cash carrying rule above!), so I used it for everything whenever I could. Global ATMs and almost all businesses will accept Visa and Mastercard debit and credit cards, but my bank (and maybe yours too) charges fees as a percent of the transacted money, so be conscious of that when tracking how much money you’re spending. Also, make sure to put a travel alert to let your banks/credit card companies know you’re going abroad BEFORE you go - you can usually do that on their websites, or if not then in a branch. If you don’t do this, you might get shut off when you try to use it here, because your bank will assume someone stole your card!

Language study, outside and inside the classroom

You will get embarrassed. A lot. Because of the circumstances this is basically unavoidable. I spent the first few days here basically shut up in my room, because I was too afraid to go outside and interact with people. You’ll note that this is an excellent way to starve to death, and also SO TOTALLY not the point of this trip! At some point you do have to just say screw it and put yourself out there and be able to laugh at yourself when you get into an awkward situation - this is the only way you’ll ever actually get better. It’s like being a little kid again; you have to make a lot of mistakes and get laughed at by those around you a LOT before you actually figure out what it is you’re doing. By the end, I was able to have a comfortable conversation with my buddy and sorta stumble-chat through interactions with cashiers at local stores, like some sort of pro at broken Korean. And it was fun! I was meeting new people and it was so encouraging, even though I probably said 0 perfectly correct sentences.

As for the classroom study - no one is saying that you have to study for hours a day (quite the opposite) but do take it seriously, because the few people I noticed slacking off also seemed to just not be enjoying themselves at all, or improving in their Korean. I know homework is homework and homework is boring, but it’s not often you get the chance to dedicate yourself to just language learning for such a long period of time. I might still kinda suck at Korean, but looking back on where I was at the beginning I’ve learned so much, and a good chunk of it is just thanks to the grammar we learn in class and the explanations of the teachers. This goes without saying, but don’t be afraid to ask questions either! In my experience, half the class is also confused about that one weird grammar you just learned but they’re too afraid to ask.

The ~experience~

It’s amazing. This summer has definitely been the best summer of my life. My vague-but-genuine advice would be this: say yes to things whenever you can. Talk to people in your classes, then go out for dinner and drinks with them. Take yourself on dates to places that look cool. Go to the Hangang parks on Friday nights, with friends or alone, because those can turn out to be the best nights ever. Eat a lot of bingsu. Take weekend or even just daylong trips outside the city (bus trips are surprisingly cheap. Korea is not that big). Revel in it! Because I already miss Korea and I haven’t even left yet. The term will give you exactly as much as you give it, so if you sit around and be mopey that’s what you’ll remember. Make those memories! Do it for the ‘gram! (Okay, only do SOME things for the ‘gram.)

With that, I peace out.

Love,

Kayleigh