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junker-town · 5 years ago

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Everything about this NFL season is breaking our brains

Photo by Tim Warner/Getty Images

At this rate, the playoffs are going to be pure chaos.

Alright NFL, you did it. You broke me. Are you happy? I don’t think it’s too much to ask that after 13 weeks, the league could give us a basic idea of which teams were good, which ones were bad, and who might have a chance to make it to the Super Bowl. Instead I sit here, a sad and broken man, without any clue what the actual hell is happening in the NFL.

Platonic ideals of parity aside, this season has completely gone off the rails. Rewind two months ago and it all felt so easy. The Patriots and Chiefs would likely contend for the AFC Championship. On the other side, you had the 49ers and the Saints. Now, who knows?

I’m truly left feeling like this is going to be a weird trap year when an obvious favorite flames out in the first round to some barely-.500 team in the kind of shocking postseason that leads to discussions about whether the whole system needs to be revamped.

Let’s start with the AFC. So you have the Patriots, but they don’t look invincible this season, not by a long shot. Losing to the Texans on Sunday night seriously damaged any absolute faith you could have in this team. The natural progression is to say, “Well, maybe the Texans really are that damn good.” Except they’ve lost to the PANTHERS this season and got decimated by the Ravens.

So then we go to the Ravens. They seem incredibly good and are coming off a big win over the 49ers to improve the resume. Lamar Jackson is playing some of the most exciting football in the NFL, period. They definitely fit the bill. Then you remember they lost to the Browns and barely scraped by against the Bengals.

The Bills? Look. I’m excited for Bills fans, but it’s going to be a cold day in hell when I anticipate anything positive for the Bills. Trust me, Bills fans don’t want anyone saying they have a chance at winning anything for fear of a jinx, and I’m much happier not going through a table in a frozen parking lot.

The AFC could be an Occam’s razor situation. Maybe the simplest answer is the correct one, which causes us to circle back to the Chiefs. Ah yes, the Chiefs. Easily the NFL’s must-watch team at the start of the season. They then went on to lose to ... the Texans and Colts.

If you can make sense of this, I’d love to hear it. All I see is a complete crapshoot that logically can only end with the Ryan Tannehill-led Titans finding a back door into the playoffs, beating the Patriots or Chiefs and playing ultimate spoiler.

Surely things must be more normal in the NFC, right? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

The Saints are the hot pick, and it’s understandable. Veteran team, Drew Brees, they’ve already clinched their division, the whole nine yards. When the Saints are good, they’re damn near unbeatable, and when they’re bad, they lose by 17 to the Falcons, which is an actual thing that happened less than a month ago. And lest we forget, they needed an undrafted kicker in Carolina to shank a 28-yard field goal to survive against the Panthers a mere week ago.

The 49ers are in the picture too. They’re at 10-2 and really are the total package. A stout defense with a young, exciting offense. There’s no reason to bet against them when a prospective playoff run is on the cards — except that loss to the Seahawks. “It was overtime,” you might say, to which I’d remind you that San Francisco got a serious scare from the Cardinals, Steelers, and Washington this year, all of which came down to single digits.

Drop a level and we have the Packers, Seahawks, and Vikings. They suffer this same weird round-robin effect of ugly losses, close scares, and unconvincing victories that make it tough to really get on board in a meaningful way.

This season is so wacky that Washington at 3-9 isn’t just in the playoff hunt — it could still win the NFC East.

Nine teams below .500 could still make the playoffs with four weeks left in the season.

I need to stop think about this. Let’s go around the league.

This juke is poetry.

Lamar juked him right out of his shoes @Lj_era8 pic.twitter.com/eVVxNrMnct

— The Checkdown (@thecheckdown) December 1, 2019

Yes, I know it was wet on the field — but stop trying to hate on fun. Lamar Jackson is just so damn fun to watch. The only thing that would have made this clip better is if Jackson literally caused people to lose their shoes, which I also fully expect to happen by the end of the season.

I love this play more than life itself.

PUNTER TO KICKER TOUCHDOWN! The @MiamiDolphins pull off the trickery! #PHIvsMIA : FOX : NFL app // Yahoo Sports app Watch free on mobile: https://t.co/uPnyeJSIAR pic.twitter.com/lf4M4xFvVO

— NFL (@NFL) December 1, 2019

There is nothing more perfect in this world than a punter throwing a touchdown to a kicker. It’s two unlikely flavors that somehow go together — like pickles and peanut butter (trust me, try this). In any event, not only is it the kind of bald-faced weirdness I can get behind for a team whose season is over, but it was incredible enough that it rectified one of the worst NFL plays of all time and proved that somehow this can work.

Maybe the best part of this play is that it’s called “The Mountaineer Shot.” I’m a fan of any play that sounds like the most dangerous moonshine you’re ever going to drink.

Congrats Florida, for spawning the dumbest NFL fans of the season.

We got anti-vaxers here at Bucs-Jags. First time I’ve seen that crowd at an NFL game. pic.twitter.com/6OkcYF9gGb

— JennaLaineESPN (@JennaLaineESPN) December 1, 2019

I like the referee imagery, though. It’s on brand. Nothing says “making a grave mistake while turning a blind eye” better than a ref. It’s just a shame you can’t go to instant replay when your kid contracts measles.

Or in Arkansas’ case, the mumps.

Arkansas athletics released a statement yesterday about the Mumps incident on the U of A campus. Sources tell me the number of football players with Mumps is significant.

— Trey Schaap (@trey1037TheBuzz) November 27, 2019

The effective end to the Panthers’ season is sadder than you could ever imagine.

Here’s fourth-and-the-season for the Panthers. pic.twitter.com/VresISdjTj

— Bill Barnwell (@billbarnwell) December 1, 2019

Kyle Allen running serpentine out of the frame is a metaphor for Carolina’s entire season. It’s just so sad — especially when you see that No. 13, Jarius Wright, was open in the end zone for almost the entire play.

Until Allen left like Poochie.

Carolina lost to Washington and while the Panthers’ season isn’t technically over ... it’s totally over.

Shoutout to the Jets for truly bringing futility to new levels.

It takes a special level of skill, determination, and horrible play to lose to the 0-7 Dolphins and the 0-11 Bengals in the same season. It’s community outreach. Nobody is better at making the rest of the country feel slightly better than the Jets.

I’d like to submit an alternate lip reading ...

Brady: "Guys, listen up. We gotta be faster, quicker, more explosive..." pic.twitter.com/kUcB1UR0OI

— Vikings Blogger (@firstandskol) December 2, 2019

“Guys, we got a beef ... STOP! Hey. We got a fondue set! Cook quicker! Cook everything! If you f*** up one more onion. Alright?! Make you you poach the chicken OFF THE BONE! Everyone on the same page? Good because we’re running out of f***ing oil and I’m not eating Top Ramen.”

I’ll let you be the judge. Either he said something to try and motivate his team, or he was unhappy with the fondue preparation on the sideline. I know which truth I believe.

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mvalleefootball-blog · 7 years ago

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Pat Keep Rolling, Crush Raiders

By Michael Vallee

It’s amazing how fast perceptions can change over the course of an NFL season. Through four weeks the Patriots record was an unimpressive 2-2 and the only thing preventing them from being 1-3 was a dropped late-game interception by the Houston Texans. New England had the worst defense in the NFL and looming on their schedule was a potentially brutal two-game road swing against the Denver Broncos and Oakland Raiders. So much for that perception. On Sunday the Patriots pounded the Raiders like they were a Mexican pinata stuffed with Super Bowl rings, coasting to a 33-8 win. This completed the Patriots two-week-high-altitude road trip where they glided thru the thin air of Denver and Mexico City with the ease of a 62-yard stephen Gostkowski field goal, outscoring their opponents 74-24.

Of course, as has been the recent trend, Patriot greatness was only half of the equation. The Raiders committed eight penalties, had two turnovers and in general performed with an almost staggering level of bumbling incompetence. What the hell happened to that team? I know Jack Del Rio isn’t going to be mistaken for Vince Lombardi any time soon but his teams are generally, at least, competitive and display a modicum of preparation. What did Oakland do all week to prepare for their Mexico trip, take lessons on burrito making and listen to Rosetta Stone? This is a team that was 12-4 last year and was on the short list of AFC teams that might actually make the Patriots sweat a little. Instead they join the long list of Houstons, Denvers, Chargers and Chiefs that can’t get out of their own way and will be lucky to finish the year at .500.

And if you think the AFC Conference is bad, how about the AFC East. I hope you don’t watch the Patriots for entertainment purposes, if so, you might want to shut it down until the playoffs. The Patriots have exactly one interesting game remaining, Pittsburgh week 15, otherwise it’s five games against their laugh-out-loud awful divisional opponents. The Bills have lost three straight, the Dolphins have lost four straight and the Jets are 1-4 in their last five. Boston’s subway system the morning of a blizzard runs with more precision than this collection of stiffs. As long as Brady is the Patriots quarterback and Belichick is the Patriots coach the league should mandate that all of their AFC East opponents change their team logo to a white flag.

The Patriots are 8-2. They are a virtual lock to win 13 or 14 games. They are going to have a first round bye. They are going to crush a lousy team with a lousy quarterback in the divisional round of the playoffs. The only pressing question left from now until the AFC Championship is whether or not that game will be played in Foxboro or Pittsburgh. So much for the unpredictability of sports.

Notes

Inside the Numbers:

-In Brady’s two games on the high altitude swing through Denver and Mexico City he was a combined 55 for 71, for 605 yards and 6 touchdowns. His QB rating was 130.3.

-In Brady’s last 22 regular season games he has thrown 50 touchdowns and 4 interceptions.

-When Brady has faced a team with Jack Del Rio as either the head coach or defensive coordinator, including the playoffs, he has thrown 25 touchdowns and one interception. Hey Jack, whatever you’re doing, it’s not working.

-On Sunday Belichick recorded win number 271 as a head coach, passing Landry for third place on the all-time list. He is still a staggering 76 wins shy of Don Shula for the top spot.

-The Patriots have won 13 straight road games. It is the 2nd longest streak in NFL history. The 1988-90 Niners are the current record holders with 18.

TB12 Method: In his constant battle to kick father time’s ass Brady was spectacular Sunday, completing over 80% of his passes for a 131.9 quarterback rating. Is it possible at age 40 that Brady is actually getting better? He is the current favorite to win the NFL MVP award; he continues to move in the pocket as well as he ever has; and he might be throwing the ball downfield with more precision than at any point in his career. Brady completed two perfect bombs to Brandin Cooks against Oakland, including a 64-yard touchdown that effectively iced the game in the first minute of the 2nd half. Brady currently leads the NFL with 43 passes over 15 yards. If they’re smart every quarterback in the NFL has ‘The TB12 Method’ on their Christmas list.

Center of Attention: One of the most impressive things about Sunday’s win over Oakland was that the Patriots were without starting center, David Andrews. Andrews is having a Pro Bowl caliber year and was replaced by a guy, Ted Karras, with virtually no game experience, and the Patriots offense didn’t miss a beat. 15 years ago the Raiders organization learned the hard way of the potential impact of losing a quality center, when their Pro Bowl center, Barret Robbins, went missing before Super Bowl XXXVII. Robbins never played in the game and their offense imploded in a 48-21 loss to the Tampa Bay Buccaneers.

Strange side note: We later learned from Robbins’ ex-wife the bizarre details of his pre-Super Bowl disappearance. The episode was apparently triggered by Robbins not taking his depression medication, and it must have been some strong medication because he spent the day before the big game partying in Tijuana, Mexico where he thought he was celebrating the Raiders “victory” in the Super Bowl that had not yet been played.

Bowl Cut: They should add a Mark Davis cam to every Raiders broadcast.

Into Thin Air: This game might have been won before the ball was ever kicked off. The Patriots not only played Denver in the thin air of mile high last week but Belichick wisely kept the team in the high altitude of Colorado, holding practices at the Air Force Academy. By the time the Patriots reached Mexico City, which is 2,000 feet higher than mile high, they were fully acclimated to the conditions. The Raiders, on the other hand, rolled into town the day before the game and looked completely gassed right out of the chute. The Raiders used the same approach last year when they beat the Houston Texans in Mexico City so they went with it again. Makes perfect sense to think that something that would work against the Texans would also work against the Patriots.

A Week in the Life of: Marshawn Lynch recently had a rather unusual week as far as NFL running backs go. He was tossed from a game for contacting an official, spent the rest of the game watching from the stands, then after the game took the train home, was eventually suspended for one game and during his suspension practiced with his old high school, causing them to be investigated for violating local high school bylaws.

Sensitivity Training: Belichick reportedly ruffled a few feathers when he said this about the game in Mexico City on WEEI Monday, “I think we’re fortunate there was no volcano eruptions, earthquakes or anything else…” A bunch of overly sensitive types freaked out on Twitter including one guy who countered that Mexicans should be happy when they visit America and are not killed in a mass shooting. Now that is a perfectly valid point considering that Mexico is a completely non-violent and safe country. I read recently that drug cartels in Juarez just instituted a new policy of meting out discipline with hugs and kindness.

He Said What Now?: Don’t expect Jerry Jones to be invited to Thanksgiving dinner at the Kraft’s this year. ESPN’s ‘Outside the Lines’ recently reported that Roger Goodell called Jerry Jones in August to inform him of Ezekiel Elliott’s six-game suspension and Jones responded with this poetic gem, “I’m gonna come after you with everything I have. If you think Bob Kraft came after you hard, Bob Kraft is a pussy compared to what I’m going to do.” While Patriots fans have likely used similar language to describe their beloved owner’s response to Deflategate, Jones is shameless hypocrite. Not long ago he was telling Kraft to stand down and accept his Deflategate punishment but when it’s Jones’ team that is being adversely affected suddenly he is singing a different tune. As far as picking sides in the Jones v. Goodell feud that would be like asking a woman who she’d rather date, Bill Cosby or Harvey Weinstein. Sophie had an easier choice.

Gridiron Death Star: Mark Davis might be a clown but is he also about to become the first owner of an NFL team in Las Vegas, where the Raiders are building one helluva a badass looking stadium. The only thing missing from this virtual tour video is a Darth Vader voice over declaring, “The battle station is almost fully operational.”

For The Record: Gostkowski’s high-altitude-aided 62-yard field goal at the end of the first half got me thinking, who is the true record holder of the longest field goal in NFL history. This title comes with two stipulations:

-The kick cannot be assisted by thin air (sorry Denver)

-The kicker has to have a human foot. As impressive as Tom Dempsey’s then record 63-yard kick was, I am looking for a field goal that was made by someone that doesn’t have a shoe shine box attached to their leg.

True Record Holder: David Akers, San Francisco 49ers

Akers kicked a 63-yard field goal in 2012 at Lambeau field which means it was both outdoors and on grass. Impressive.

Terry Glenn, 1974-2017: Tough news hearing about the sudden death of Terry Glenn from an automobile accident. Apparently Glenn had an infamous reputation as a driver, a sentiment echoed on Twitter by WEEI’s Gerry Callahan, “I spent a day with Terry Glenn once upon a time. Nice enough guy, but I remember one thing above all others: He drove like a maniac”. People might not remember that Glenn caught Brady’s first touchdown pass and it came during Brady’s breakout came as a pro. After two unspectacular starts Brady lit it up in his third start, a 29-26 win over the San Diego Chargers, throwing for 364 yards and two touchdowns. More significantly Glenn was at the heart of the infamous power struggle between owner Bob Kraft and then coach Bill Parcells. It was just before the 1996 draft and the Patriots held the seventh spot in the first round. Kraft and Director of Player Personnel, Bobby Grier, wanted a lightning fast wide receiver out of Ohio State and Parcells reportedly wanted to take a defensive lineman. Kraft would eventually side with Grier and the Patriots drafted Terry Glenn.

This move was the beginning of the end for Parcells’ time in New England. After the season Parcells was hired to run the NY Jets and Grier was promoted to general manager. Glenn had a highly productive rookie year, hauling in 90 catches for over 1,100 yards, but a disappointing career plagued by injuries and attitude problems. If, however, you believe in the butterfly effect, Glenn proved to be the catalyst for Bill Belichick ultimately landing with the Patriots and taking them on this historic run. His Patriots career may have been disappointing but his impact is still being felt. Glenn was 43-years old.

#new england patriots #oakland raiders #nfl #tom brady #bill belichick #mexico #azteca stadium #terry glenn #mark davis #stephen gostkowski #parcells #bobby grier #jack del rio #bob kraft #don shula #jerry jones #las vegas

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flauntpage · 7 years ago

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Ranking Every NFL Team's Super Bowl Chances

With eight weeks of the 2017 NFL season in the books (we all know the Chiefs are beating the Broncos on Monday night so we can do this now), it's time to take stock of each team's Super Bowl chances. You're probably saying, "That's silly, because not all 32 teams have a chance at a Super Bowl."

You're right, but those teams are great for the purpose of making jokes.

Let's get right into it, because 32 is a lot of teams.

32. San Francisco 49ers (0-8) — lmao

31. Cleveland Browns (0-8) — lol

30. New York Giants (1-6) — OK, so maybe doing this with all 32 teams was a little ambitious. The good news is the New England Patriots are looking like the favorites to represent the AFC in the Super Bowl, and everyone knows Tom Brady can't beat Eli Manning in a Super Bowl. The bad news is the only time we're seeing Odell Beckham in a Super Bowl is in that painful ad with the Silicon Valley guy who mixes up sports terminology at the press conference like a TOTAL NERD, lol learn sports, nerd!

29. Indianapolis Colts (2-6) — What if the reason Andrew Luck hasn't played this season is because he's undergoing surgery and treatment that will allow him to become Wolverine? The reports surrounding Luck's "injury" have been odd, with the story changing every couple weeks. Even his name—Luck—would be a cool X-Men name. The Colts will be a tough out in January if their quarterback can't be tackled by regular humans.

28. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (2-5) — When you combine a former Florida State quarterback with a former Jacksonville Jaguars offensive coordinator, you should just be happy to have the 28th-best team in the NFL.

27. Oakland Raiders (3-5) — Just move this stupid franchise to the moon already. In hindsight, a team coming off a breakout season signing a guy who had retired for a year just because he's from the area was an odd choice. And, I mean, Marshawn Lynch is clearly his own guy, so him running on the field to fight some dudes mid-game does, in hindsight, seem inevitable. We should have known the Raiders would screw this up.

26. New York Jets (3-5) — The way I see it, the Jets may have the best chance of winning the Super Bowl, because these are the Jets, and whatever they want to do, the opposite happens. Since they're trying to tank, finishing 9-7 and winning the Super Bowl has about an 80 percent chance of happening. They're the Cleveland Indians in Major League except Rachel Phelps was a much more sympathetic owner. Who wouldn't rather live in Miami than Cleveland?

25. Los Angeles Chargers (3-5) — Prove to me the Chargers weren't trying to lose to the Patriots on Sunday. When teams shave points, usually they try to hide it, but Philip Rivers fumbling with no contact and a guy running backward 15 yards to take a safety is a little too obvious. The Chargers don't want to win, so I won't raise the hopes of the 800 people in Los Angeles who care about them.

24. Chicago Bears (3-5) — Every team in the league has three wins, FYI. Mitch Trubisky completed 43 percent of his passes Sunday against the Saints, which shows why the Bears only allowed him to throw seven passes two weeks ago. An NFL quarterback completing 43 percent of passes against the Saints would be like an NBA player shooting 2-of-19 against a high school team. It's too bad someone like Deshaun Watson wasn't available at the draft when the Bears… [looks back at draft order] oh, whoops.

23. Cincinnati Bengals (3-4) — Say it out loud: "Andy Dalton, Super Bowl champion." Yeah, never gonna happen.

22. Arizona Cardinals (3-4) — If David Johnson returns in time, yeah, why not the Cardinals? He recently referred to the wrist as a "complicated limb," which tells me he's taking advantage of the painkillers. "Bro, ever think about wrists? They're like… complicated, man." If Carson Palmer is upright, weirder things have happened.

21. Washington Sports Franchise (3-4) — Bob Kraft is a buddy of Vlad Putin, but doesn't he feel miscast as owner of the sport's most hated franchise? Wouldn't Dan Snyder make more sense with the Patriots? Sadly, Snyder is an inept billionaire with a barely functioning franchise and a quarterback taking his money one mediocre year at a time. Washington's season died Sunday against Dallas, but take comfort in knowing the team will win just enough games so they won't be able to draft a franchise quarterback after Cousins leaves in the off-season.

20. Houston Texans (3-4) — Deshaun Watson might be the most talented rookie quarterback in modern NFL history, and you just know Bill O'Brien will screw it up. After his defense had shown for an entire half it was incapable of stopping the Seahawks on Sunday, he ran it three straight times, punted, and watched Russell Wilson deliver a near instantaneous death blow. When Watson wins a Super Bowl, it won't be with O'Brien clenching on the sideline in a big game.

19. Detroit Lions (3-4) — It's the Super Bowl. Lions down five. Fourth and goal. Two seconds remaining. Matthew Stafford rolls right, time expires, he throws and…Eric Ebron! Touchdown! No time left! The Lions have—hang on. Officials are gathering in the end zone. "Due to the pass being caught with no time left, the touchdown is only worth 4.5 points. Therefore, by rule, which was just invented before the play in secret in the league office, the game is over, Lions lose." The following day, the NFL will apologize for not allowing the Lions to kick the winning extra point but won't take the title away from the Patriots. I guess what I'm saying is, the Lions, no matter what, will find a way to not win the Super Bowl.

18. Denver Broncos (3-3) — You lose at home to the Giants by 13 points, I don't understand why you even show up for the rest of your games.

17. Baltimore Ravens (4-4) — The Ravens are the NFL's ideal picture of mediocrity. A quarterback that's just OK enough, a defense that'll do just enough to win a couple games, and boom, you're 8-8 at the end of the year. This will be the state of the Ravens for two decades as punishment for years of making us watch Ray Lewis dance.

16. Dallas Cowboys (4-3) — If Ezekiel Elliott's arbitrator is based in Texas and has him in fantasy football, sure, maybe he plays the whole season and the Cowboys can do it. There's no harder team to read, but if there's one thing I know about sports justice, it's that Elliott won't face any discipline until the 2021 season, when his suspension is reduced to three preseason games.

15. Tennessee Titans (4-3) — They have two very good running backs, a pretty good quarterback, a decent group of wide receivers, and a defense that's…clearly the weak link. But really, what makes the Titans different from last year's Falcons? Fine, Eric Decker isn't Julio Jones and Rishard Matthews isn't Mohammed Sanu, and…OK, fine, forget it. I almost talked myself into it.

14. Miami Dolphins (4-3) — How in the name of sweet baby Jesus has this team won more games than it has lost? I'm scrolling up from the bottom of the NFL standings as I write this, and when I saw the Dolphins here at 4-3, I did that blinking guy GIF everyone on Twitter loves. The Dolphins team on Ballers coached by Peter Berg and GM'd by Dulé Hill has a better chance of winning it all.

13. Jacksonville Jaguars (4-3) — Blake Bortles, you just won the Super Bowl, where are you going? "I'm going to Dorney Park!" No, Blake, the other amusement park. "I'm going to Busch Gardens!" No, man, forget it. If the Jags are going all the way, it's via their defense, but I think it's fun to imagine Bortles doing all he can to muck it up along the way, then lying to him that he's MVP just so you can get him to say into a cellphone camera, "I'm going to Six Flags Great Adventure!" That's viral content, my friends.

12. Green Bay Packers (4-3) — Nope. I'm sorry. The NFC North is too tough for the Packers to survive the rest of the regular season without Aaron Rodgers. What's truly torturous for fans is how many commercials that have Rodgers and injured Giants wide receiver Odell Beckham Jr. Every commercial break, you're reminded that your favorite team's season is over because the best player was broken in two. There should be a rule that if an NFL guy is out for the year, he gets replaced by his backup in any national ad campaign. Brett Hundley gets all the State Farm ads the final nine weeks. Roger Lewis Jr. gets all the Verizon ads. Sorry, but it's now in the CBA.

11. Atlanta Falcons (4-3) — The Falcons' hangover isn't a 22-year-old's hangover, where you're slightly groggy the next day but you can still attend your CrossFit Sauna Expert Master class at 6 AM; this is a 39-year-old hangover where you Google "can you die from a hangover" from your bed at 7 PM the next day. I still think if the Falcons can make themselves puke one more time before the stretch run, the Falcons can get back to the Super Bowl.

10. Carolina Panthers (5-3) — If the Dolphins are the league's worst 4-3 team, the Panthers are the league's worst 5-3 team. Cam Newton has nine touchdowns and ten interceptions in eight games and the Panthers are headed toward the playoffs because football is a crapshoot like no other sport, and players don't matter, for we are all part of a human experiment known as life where chaos and randomness rule us despite our best efforts to seek control. Eat at Arby's.

9. Seattle Seahawks (5-2) — They can't run the ball and the defense is sort of old, but you have to respect the championship pedigree. You get the sense the Seahawks are that college graduate taking a year off to "find themselves" and they'll either be better off for the journey or they'll still have zero offensive line when it's over and won't be able to find a job in a saturated marketplace when they return home. I'm mixing metaphors there but you get my point. If Sunday showed us anything, it's that when Pete Carroll, a good coach, gets in a close game with a bad coach like Bill O'Brien, he'll find a way to win, and fortunately for Seattle there are more bad coaches than good coaches in the NFL.

8. New Orleans Saints (5-2) — The Saints are Steelers South. Only instead of defense, the Saints offense has looked incredible against mostly slop. They've won five straight against the Panthers, the Dolphins, the Lions, the Rodgers-less Packers, and the Bears. There's maybe one impressive win in there. Can you really count on the Saints to shut down a really good offense? Wait, does anyone have a good offense besides the Saints? My god, they are going 14-2, aren't they? This could happen.

7. Los Angeles Rams (5-2) — It's not going to happen, but the idea of a disheveled Jeff Fisher alone in a shack watching what is mostly the same roster he had last season continue to advance in the playoffs while he mutters "7-9…7-9" to himself is a fun image. Fisher will start a Buzzfeed account and start writing things like "16 Ways Millennials Are Ruining Jeff Fisher's Life" that will just be GIFs of Sean McVay.

6. Kansas City Chiefs (5-2) — Say hello to our best hope of beating the Patriots, which, oh well, maybe next year the Patriots won't get to the Super Bowl. Imagine a superhero movie with the worst possible villain, only instead of the Avengers or Batman, the villain has to defeat Paul Blart. That's the Chiefs. The only way the Chiefs win that matchup is if our world is a feel-good comedy and not film noir directed by Christopher Nolan. Based on recent evidence in this world, what do you think happens in a Chiefs-Patriots AFC title game? Yeah, me too.

5. Buffalo Bills (5-2) — Nothing would be funnier than the Bills beating the Patriots in the playoffs. It would be the greatest 1980s movie ever where the nerd finally gets the best of the bully. Tyrod Taylor dropping 40 on Tom Brady in Foxboro would be the Lucas/Karate Kid mashup Bill Simmons wishes he sold to a movie studio ten years ago. But this is reality, and what's more likely is LeSean McCoy tearing his ACL the Friday before the game and Rob Gronkowski somehow growing a foot taller at halftime and posting 300 yards in the second half.

4. Pittsburgh Steelers (6-2) — Yeah, the Steelers have the second-best defense, but they've compiled these numbers against the Browns, the Vikings, the Bears, the Ravens, the Jaguars, the Chiefs, the Bengals, and the Lions. Outside of the Chiefs, that's just pure dreck. But there's more dreck on the schedule, so the Steelers are practically a lock to make the playoffs, which seems nuts when you consider that two weeks ago when they lost to the Jaguars you wondered if Ben Roethlisberger would retire mid-season. This league stinks.

3. Minnesota Vikings (6-2) — No. This is a glitch in the Matrix. Instead of two cats, it's Case Keenum and Sam Bradford looking exactly the same in everything they do. The difference this year is the Packers are toast without Rodgers so the NFC North is there for the taking. It's not that Vikings are bad, but I don't want to listen to people talk about how good they are. They're basically a Netflix show.

2. Philadelphia Eagles (7-1) — It's pretty tough right now for a certain segment of the U.S. population—the Eagles and the Yankees are getting really good again at the same time. And both will be really good for a long time. It's heartbreaking. There's no reason the Eagles can't win a Super Bowl this year, other than the fact they are the Eagles and they always find a way to crap their pants. You can take the Andy Reid out of Philadelphia but you can't take the Philadelphia out of Andy Reid. Or something. Fuck the Eagles, man.

1. New England Patriots (6-2) — There's no better evidence that we are living in a computer simulation run by a vindictive sociopath than the existence of the Patriots. Their idiot quarterback is 100 years old but plays like he's 28. The team cheats but nobody cares. The coach writes love letters to Donald Trump. The Pats could have and perhaps should have lost their past four games but, of course, they won them all. This team has no business still being Super Bowl favorites but it's time we just accept that this is our reality until Morpheus finds us and frees our minds. Congrats to the Patriots on another Super Bowl win.

Ranking Every NFL Team's Super Bowl Chances published first on http://ift.tt/2pLTmlv

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amtushinfosolutionspage · 7 years ago

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Ranking Every NFL Team’s Super Bowl Chances

With eight weeks of the 2017 NFL season in the books (we all know the Chiefs are beating the Broncos on Monday night so we can do this now), it’s time to take stock of each team’s Super Bowl chances. You’re probably saying, “That’s silly, because not all 32 teams have a chance at a Super Bowl.”

You’re right, but those teams are great for the purpose of making jokes.

Let’s get right into it, because 32 is a lot of teams.

32. San Francisco 49ers (0-8) — lmao

31. Cleveland Browns (0-8) — lol

30. New York Giants (1-6) — OK, so maybe doing this with all 32 teams was a little ambitious. The good news is the New England Patriots are looking like the favorites to represent the AFC in the Super Bowl, and everyone knows Tom Brady can’t beat Eli Manning in a Super Bowl. The bad news is the only time we’re seeing Odell Beckham in a Super Bowl is in that painful ad with the Silicon Valley guy who mixes up sports terminology at the press conference like a TOTAL NERD, lol learn sports, nerd!

29. Indianapolis Colts (2-6) — What if the reason Andrew Luck hasn’t played this season is because he’s undergoing surgery and treatment that will allow him to become Wolverine? The reports surrounding Luck’s “injury” have been odd, with the story changing every couple weeks. Even his name—Luck—would be a cool X-Men name. The Colts will be a tough out in January if their quarterback can’t be tackled by regular humans.

27. Oakland Raiders (3-5) — Just move this stupid franchise to the moon already. In hindsight, a team coming off a breakout season signing a guy who had retired for a year just because he’s from the area was an odd choice. And, I mean, Marshawn Lynch is clearly his own guy, so him running on the field to fight some dudes mid-game does, in hindsight, seem inevitable. We should have known the Raiders would screw this up.

26. New York Jets (3-5) — The way I see it, the Jets may have the best chance of winning the Super Bowl, because these are the Jets, and whatever they want to do, the opposite happens. Since they’re trying to tank, finishing 9-7 and winning the Super Bowl has about an 80 percent chance of happening. They’re the Cleveland Indians in Major League except Rachel Phelps was a much more sympathetic owner. Who wouldn’t rather live in Miami than Cleveland?

25. Los Angeles Chargers (3-5) — Prove to me the Chargers weren’t trying to lose to the Patriots on Sunday. When teams shave points, usually they try to hide it, but Philip Rivers fumbling with no contact and a guy running backward 15 yards to take a safety is a little too obvious. The Chargers don’t want to win, so I won’t raise the hopes of the 800 people in Los Angeles who care about them.

24. Chicago Bears (3-5) — Every team in the league has three wins, FYI. Mitch Trubisky completed 43 percent of his passes Sunday against the Saints, which shows why the Bears only allowed him to throw seven passes two weeks ago. An NFL quarterback completing 43 percent of passes against the Saints would be like an NBA player shooting 2-of-19 against a high school team. It’s too bad someone like Deshaun Watson wasn’t available at the draft when the Bears… [looks back at draft order] oh, whoops.

23. Cincinnati Bengals (3-4) — Say it out loud: “Andy Dalton, Super Bowl champion.” Yeah, never gonna happen.

22. Arizona Cardinals (3-4) — If David Johnson returns in time, yeah, why not the Cardinals? He recently referred to the wrist as a “complicated limb,” which tells me he’s taking advantage of the painkillers. “Bro, ever think about wrists? They’re like… complicated, man.” If Carson Palmer is upright, weirder things have happened.

21. Washington Sports Franchise (3-4) — Bob Kraft is a buddy of Vlad Putin, but doesn’t he feel miscast as owner of the sport’s most hated franchise? Wouldn’t Dan Snyder make more sense with the Patriots? Sadly, Snyder is an inept billionaire with a barely functioning franchise and a quarterback taking his money one mediocre year at a time. Washington’s season died Sunday against Dallas, but take comfort in knowing the team will win just enough games so they won’t be able to draft a franchise quarterback after Cousins leaves in the off-season.

20. Houston Texans (3-4) — Deshaun Watson might be the most talented rookie quarterback in modern NFL history, and you just know Bill O’Brien will screw it up. After his defense had shown for an entire half it was incapable of stopping the Seahawks on Sunday, he ran it three straight times, punted, and watched Russell Wilson deliver a near instantaneous death blow. When Watson wins a Super Bowl, it won’t be with O’Brien clenching on the sideline in a big game.

19. Detroit Lions (3-4) — It’s the Super Bowl. Lions down five. Fourth and goal. Two seconds remaining. Matthew Stafford rolls right, time expires, he throws and…Eric Ebron! Touchdown! No time left! The Lions have—hang on. Officials are gathering in the end zone. “Due to the pass being caught with no time left, the touchdown is only worth 4.5 points. Therefore, by rule, which was just invented before the play in secret in the league office, the game is over, Lions lose.” The following day, the NFL will apologize for not allowing the Lions to kick the winning extra point but won’t take the title away from the Patriots. I guess what I’m saying is, the Lions, no matter what, will find a way to not win the Super Bowl.

18. Denver Broncos (3-3) — You lose at home to the Giants by 13 points, I don’t understand why you even show up for the rest of your games.

17. Baltimore Ravens (4-4) — The Ravens are the NFL’s ideal picture of mediocrity. A quarterback that’s just OK enough, a defense that’ll do just enough to win a couple games, and boom, you’re 8-8 at the end of the year. This will be the state of the Ravens for two decades as punishment for years of making us watch Ray Lewis dance.

16. Dallas Cowboys (4-3) — If Ezekiel Elliott’s arbitrator is based in Texas and has him in fantasy football, sure, maybe he plays the whole season and the Cowboys can do it. There’s no harder team to read, but if there’s one thing I know about sports justice, it’s that Elliott won’t face any discipline until the 2021 season, when his suspension is reduced to three preseason games.

15. Tennessee Titans (4-3) — They have two very good running backs, a pretty good quarterback, a decent group of wide receivers, and a defense that’s…clearly the weak link. But really, what makes the Titans different from last year’s Falcons? Fine, Eric Decker isn’t Julio Jones and Rishard Matthews isn’t Mohammed Sanu, and…OK, fine, forget it. I almost talked myself into it.

14. Miami Dolphins (4-3) — How in the name of sweet baby Jesus has this team won more games than it has lost? I’m scrolling up from the bottom of the NFL standings as I write this, and when I saw the Dolphins here at 4-3, I did that blinking guy GIF everyone on Twitter loves. The Dolphins team on Ballers coached by Peter Berg and GM’d by Dulé Hill has a better chance of winning it all.

13. Jacksonville Jaguars (4-3) — Blake Bortles, you just won the Super Bowl, where are you going? “I’m going to Dorney Park!” No, Blake, the other amusement park. “I’m going to Busch Gardens!” No, man, forget it. If the Jags are going all the way, it’s via their defense, but I think it’s fun to imagine Bortles doing all he can to muck it up along the way, then lying to him that he’s MVP just so you can get him to say into a cellphone camera, “I’m going to Six Flags Great Adventure!” That’s viral content, my friends.

12. Green Bay Packers (4-3) — Nope. I’m sorry. The NFC North is too tough for the Packers to survive the rest of the regular season without Aaron Rodgers. What’s truly torturous for fans is how many commercials that have Rodgers and injured Giants wide receiver Odell Beckham Jr. Every commercial break, you’re reminded that your favorite team’s season is over because the best player was broken in two. There should be a rule that if an NFL guy is out for the year, he gets replaced by his backup in any national ad campaign. Brett Hundley gets all the State Farm ads the final nine weeks. Roger Lewis Jr. gets all the Verizon ads. Sorry, but it’s now in the CBA.

11. Atlanta Falcons (4-3) — The Falcons’ hangover isn’t a 22-year-old’s hangover, where you’re slightly groggy the next day but you can still attend your CrossFit Sauna Expert Master class at 6 AM; this is a 39-year-old hangover where you Google “can you die from a hangover” from your bed at 7 PM the next day. I still think if the Falcons can make themselves puke one more time before the stretch run, the Falcons can get back to the Super Bowl.

10. Carolina Panthers (5-3) — If the Dolphins are the league’s worst 4-3 team, the Panthers are the league’s worst 5-3 team. Cam Newton has nine touchdowns and ten interceptions in eight games and the Panthers are headed toward the playoffs because football is a crapshoot like no other sport, and players don’t matter, for we are all part of a human experiment known as life where chaos and randomness rule us despite our best efforts to seek control. Eat at Arby’s.

9. Seattle Seahawks (5-2) — They can’t run the ball and the defense is sort of old, but you have to respect the championship pedigree. You get the sense the Seahawks are that college graduate taking a year off to “find themselves” and they’ll either be better off for the journey or they’ll still have zero offensive line when it’s over and won’t be able to find a job in a saturated marketplace when they return home. I’m mixing metaphors there but you get my point. If Sunday showed us anything, it’s that when Pete Carroll, a good coach, gets in a close game with a bad coach like Bill O’Brien, he’ll find a way to win, and fortunately for Seattle there are more bad coaches than good coaches in the NFL.

8. New Orleans Saints (5-2) — The Saints are Steelers South. Only instead of defense, the Saints offense has looked incredible against mostly slop. They’ve won five straight against the Panthers, the Dolphins, the Lions, the Rodgers-less Packers, and the Bears. There’s maybe one impressive win in there. Can you really count on the Saints to shut down a really good offense? Wait, does anyone have a good offense besides the Saints? My god, they are going 14-2, aren’t they? This could happen.

7. Los Angeles Rams (5-2) — It’s not going to happen, but the idea of a disheveled Jeff Fisher alone in a shack watching what is mostly the same roster he had last season continue to advance in the playoffs while he mutters “7-9…7-9” to himself is a fun image. Fisher will start a Buzzfeed account and start writing things like “16 Ways Millennials Are Ruining Jeff Fisher’s Life” that will just be GIFs of Sean McVay.

6. Kansas City Chiefs (5-2) — Say hello to our best hope of beating the Patriots, which, oh well, maybe next year the Patriots won’t get to the Super Bowl. Imagine a superhero movie with the worst possible villain, only instead of the Avengers or Batman, the villain has to defeat Paul Blart. That’s the Chiefs. The only way the Chiefs win that matchup is if our world is a feel-good comedy and not film noir directed by Christopher Nolan. Based on recent evidence in this world, what do you think happens in a Chiefs-Patriots AFC title game? Yeah, me too.

5. Buffalo Bills (5-2) — Nothing would be funnier than the Bills beating the Patriots in the playoffs. It would be the greatest 1980s movie ever where the nerd finally gets the best of the bully. Tyrod Taylor dropping 40 on Tom Brady in Foxboro would be the Lucas/Karate Kid mashup Bill Simmons wishes he sold to a movie studio ten years ago. But this is reality, and what’s more likely is LeSean McCoy tearing his ACL the Friday before the game and Rob Gronkowski somehow growing a foot taller at halftime and posting 300 yards in the second half.

4. Pittsburgh Steelers (6-2) — Yeah, the Steelers have the second-best defense, but they’ve compiled these numbers against the Browns, the Vikings, the Bears, the Ravens, the Jaguars, the Chiefs, the Bengals, and the Lions. Outside of the Chiefs, that’s just pure dreck. But there’s more dreck on the schedule, so the Steelers are practically a lock to make the playoffs, which seems nuts when you consider that two weeks ago when they lost to the Jaguars you wondered if Ben Roethlisberger would retire mid-season. This league stinks.

3. Minnesota Vikings (6-2) — No. This is a glitch in the Matrix. Instead of two cats, it’s Case Keenum and Sam Bradford looking exactly the same in everything they do. The difference this year is the Packers are toast without Rodgers so the NFC North is there for the taking. It’s not that Vikings are bad, but I don’t want to listen to people talk about how good they are. They’re basically a Netflix show.

2. Philadelphia Eagles (7-1) — It’s pretty tough right now for a certain segment of the U.S. population—the Eagles and the Yankees are getting really good again at the same time. And both will be really good for a long time. It’s heartbreaking. There’s no reason the Eagles can’t win a Super Bowl this year, other than the fact they are the Eagles and they always find a way to crap their pants. You can take the Andy Reid out of Philadelphia but you can’t take the Philadelphia out of Andy Reid. Or something. Fuck the Eagles, man.

1. New England Patriots (6-2) — There’s no better evidence that we are living in a computer simulation run by a vindictive sociopath than the existence of the Patriots. Their idiot quarterback is 100 years old but plays like he’s 28. The team cheats but nobody cares. The coach writes love letters to Donald Trump. The Pats could have and perhaps should have lost their past four games but, of course, they won them all. This team has no business still being Super Bowl favorites but it’s time we just accept that this is our reality until Morpheus finds us and frees our minds. Congrats to the Patriots on another Super Bowl win.

Ranking Every NFL Team’s Super Bowl Chances syndicated from http://ift.tt/2ug2Ns6

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cover32-yahoopartner-blog · 7 years ago

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cover32 NFL Season Preview Roundtable

Last week, cover32 debuted a series focusing on the doppelgangers of some of the top NFL players of today. We found those of Tyreek Hill, Tom Brady, Bill Belichick, Aaron Rodgers, Ben Roethlisberger, David Johnson, and J.J. Wyatt.

This week, we gather together all of the cover32 national staff, for a roundtable discussion on the upcoming 2017 NFL Season.

Some of our writers will be familiar faces, some may not be.

The participants:

Editors:

Bobby Burack — Editor of cover32 daily national content; Managing Editor for cover32 Packers

Jacob Infante — Editor of cover32 weekly national content

Writers:

Robert Molnar ��National writer for cover32; Managing Editor for cover32 Bills and cover32 Dolphins

Patrick Hatten — National writer for cover32; Managing Editor for cover32 Falcons

Jake Schyvinck — Managing Editor for cover32 Chiefs

Curtis Rawls — Managing Editor for cover32 Giants; National writer for cover32

Carter English — National writer for cover32

Ian Glendon — Managing Editor for cover32 Patriots; National writer for cover32

Stephen Ur: National writer for cover32

Patrick Backlas — Managing Editor for cover32 Ravens; National writer for cover32

Andrew Erickson — cover32 Packers fantasy writer; host of “cover32 Fantasy Periscope with Andrew Erickson”

AROUND COVER32

Around the NFL: Chiefs’ TE, Travis Kelce, skyrockets up 65 places on NFL Network’s Top 100 list

What’s Trending: Raiders’ QB, Derek Carr, inches closer to massive payday

2017 Free Agency: Patriots agree to two-year deal with former Jets’ LB, David Harris

Fantasy Forecast: Projecting Dolphins’ RB, Jay Ajayi’s fantasy value in 2017

Counterparts: Is All-Pro QB, Aaron Rodgers, the Floyd Mayweather of the NFL

1. cover32 has assembled a brand new cast for their national content for the upcoming 2017 season. Most of you were re-introduced last week in the debut of our doppelgänger series. For those that are new readers, tell the audience everything they need to know about you. Also, what is the best way to contact you?

Burack: For the ones that will find my name familiar will be 50% fans of my work; 50% haters. My work can be distinguished for firmly believing Aaron Rodgers is the best ever and, of course, Tom Brady is a product of the greatest system ever. Also, could be known for sports satire… as so many take this stuff all too serious. For a little background on myself, I use to be NFL writer for FanSided. I was blessed during my junior year of high school to be land a spot working for a magazine entitled, “The Gold Collectors Magazine”. My work there was centered around covering the history of the Chicago Cubs and there long, devasting World Series drought. I currently work at a radio station, DJing, performing sports interviews, color commentary for football and hockey, as well as other assignments. I have appeared on numerous sites for freelance work including The Big Lead. For those who are a fan of my work… stay tuned… all sorts of things are coming. For those who are not… I am not going anywhere. @bburack16.

Infante: I have been a member of the cover32 community since May of last year. Since then, I have been the managing editor of both the Jaguars and Bears pages here. While I have since stepped down from those roles, I have been transitioning to a national-based role here at cover32. I’ve loved football and writing since I was about six. After a tenure of playing football that could be best described as God awful, I decided to turn my attention to writing. Despite the wishes of many lovely folks, I have neither retired nor quit writing altogether quite yet. I have a penchant for all things Chicago sports, but football has always been my first love. You can follow me on Twitter at @jacobinfante24. If you wish to contact me for business measures or death threats, I can be contacted through email at [email protected].

Molnar: I am a lifelong Miami Dolphins fan that was born and raised in the southwest area of Florida. Despite also writing for the rival Buffalo Bills blog here with cover32, I try to remain unbiased when talking about those dastardly… I mean, lovely Bills. Besides writing for cover32, I also create the away game reports for the ECHL’s Florida Everblades, my true childhood love. Readers can reach me on Twitter @RMolnar1010.

Hatten: Most people don’t realize that I’m the best never-employed comedy script punch-up guy not physically living in Hollywood. Outside of my cover32 pieces, all of my TV pilot scripts and pitches are locked in a vault that’s more impregnable than Disney’s. So while I’m keeping my ‘A’ material stored away for time immemorial, I still felt that I should share my unique (unique’s a synonym for crappy, right?) humor and views the world through football articles. That’s why everyone should follow the cover32 Falcons feed. I haven’t let my success go to my head yet, so please feel free to reach me via email (scathing manifestos only please) at [email protected] or on Twitter at @TheDeuce (I usually follow back unless you’re completely normal).

Schyvinck: I am currently a student at the University of Illinois studying economics and computer science, but I am a sports fan and sports nerd at heart. I am a huge football fan and a huge Packer fan. I am the managing editor of the Chiefs at cover32. The best way to contact me is to message me on Twitter @cover32_KC and @JSchyvinck13.

Rawls: Although I live in New England, I am not now, nor will I ever be a fan of the Patriots. In fact, the notion that they are kind of the gold standard in the NFL makes me nauseous. I can take solace in knowing that Eli Manning got his two rings at the expense of the Evil Empire, I mean the Patriots. Although my heart bleeds Big Blue, I am objective and make no excuses for them no matter what their record is. I am on Twitter @CuRawls203.

English: I live in the southwest suburbs of Chicago. Despite being born in Illinois, I am a diehard Steelers fan and a fair weather Bears fan. My Dad’s side of the family is from western Pennsylvania, so I was born with black and gold in my blood. Even though my family and I are Steelers fans, we are also Cubs, Blackhawks, and Bulls fans. I have a huge love for Big Ben, and I hate Tom Brady with all of my life (I promise not to be biased). You can find me on twitter @Carter_English9.

Glendon: I spent the majority of my life in Massachusetts and I am an avid Boston sports fan. Currently, I reside in sunny Florida but I represent New England sports to the fullest. On top of being the Managing Editor for the Patriots section and a National Writer for cover32, I cover high school baseball in the Tampa, FL area. I love sports and they have been a passion of mine since I could speak. I hope to bring the same passion to my stories each and every day. I can be contacted on Twitter @iglen31 and you can email me: [email protected]

Ur: I am very serious about sports journalism. While my main goal is sports radio, I find myself doing a lot of sports writing. I also host several podcasts (The SCU Show, This Week in the AFL, NAL Now, The Football Five). The best way to reach me is on Twitter @writingfanatic2.

Backlas: My name is Patrick Backlas and I am the managing editor for the Baltimore Ravens page. I am currently a journalism student at Wayne State University in Detroit. Being from the Detroit area I have always been a Lions fan, somewhat, unfortunately. Hit me up on Twitter @patrickbacklas or @Cover32_bal

Erickson: What is going, everyone? The name is Andrew Erickson and I am a writer for the cover32_GB account on Twitter. I will be doing some big things in terms of fantasy football for the national cover32 profile in 2017. Despite the fact that I cover on the Packers my actual favorite team is the reigning Super Bowl champs. I have lived in New England my entire life and have been to a few AFC Championship Games (winning and losing). If you ever have fantasy football questions or just want to say hi just reach out to me @Andrewerickson_ on Twitter. And as always if you ask for a follow, I am more than happy to oblige.

2. With still over two months until the start of the 2017 NFL Season, the NFL is still constantly in the news. What do you think is the biggest storyline heading into the season?

Burack: Easy answer, the Dallas Cowboys. Isn’t that always the answer? They are the biggest story in sports. Whether it be for the right or wrong reasons. Last year they were led by two rookies to the first seed in the NFC. Will they suffer a sophomore slump? Will one of them? Will neither? Will they get the first seed again? Wil they miss the playoffs? These are just some of the many questions surrounding America’s Team. Not to mention. the always controversial, Jerry Jones still the owner. Oh, and former quarterback, Tony Romo, is now in the booth for Fox. What games does Fox get? The NFC games. Who is the most televised NFC team? The Cowboys.

Infante: I think that the biggest storyline this season is whether or not Tom Brady can continue his greatness. Going on 40 this season, he has yet to show any signs of declining. After last year’s stunning Super Bowl victory, Brady emerged in the minds of many (including myself) as the greatest of all time. But how long can he stay great? And can he lead the Patriots to yet another championship?

Molnar: The biggest storyline at this stage of the offseason has to be the Colin Kaepernick saga. Going the controversial route last season, Kaepernick looks to have been blacklisted by the NFL and its teams. Whether this is deserved or not is up for you to decide, but there is no doubting that this piece of news will almost certainly remain relevant the closer we get to the start of the NFL Season.

Hatten: The biggest storyline in my mind is “Who Can Stop The Patriots From Winning ‘One For The Other Hand?'” There are a lot of teams that are just ‘good,’ and it’s definitely not going be one without a competent quarterback (sorry Jaguars). How can a team keep shipping out their star players year by year and improve?! Bill Belichick’s biggest strength is his lack of emotion. We all get clouded by it like New York City smog in the ’70s, but Belichick just looks at his players like John Nash sees algorithms.

Schyvinck: The biggest storyline has been written during the offseason. Who is going to contend with the Patriots and their organization? They continually prove that they have better discipline, better coaching, and a better scheme than anyone in the league. Everyone is chasing them this season. They lost some key players, but then reloaded through free agency and the draft. I’m not sure who can stop them in 2017.

Rawls: The biggest headline heading into the season, much to my chagrin, will be the defending Super Bowl champions. They are chasing their sixth Lombardi Trophy with a quarterback that will turn 40 on Aug. 3. Belichick already has more Super Bowls than any other coach, now he’s chasing George Halas and Curly Lambeau for most league championships in history. Everybody has them has the favorites, so it will be interesting to see them defend their title.

English: The biggest storyline heading into the 2017 season is, can Dak keep rolling with Dallas? We know Dallas has good offensive players. We know Ezekiel Elliott is here to stay. We know the offensive line is great, but these rookie quarterbacks that go out and post big numbers in their rookie years do not look anything near their numbers in their second years. A few examples would be Matt Ryan’s second year, RGIII’s second year, and Sam Bradford’s second year. I think Dallas is overwhelmingly the most interesting story.

Glendon: The Patriots. They are the biggest story 365 days a week and heading into this season, it’s well deserved. Not only are they the defending champions, they have loaded up to the point that people see a run at 16-0, and eventually 19-0, as a realistic possibility. Until the Patriots lose, and that’s not a guarantee, they will be the biggest storyline in the NFL next year.

Ur: The biggest storyline has to be can Dak Prescott and Ezekiel Elliot repeat their performances from last year. The two then rookies took the lead by storm, leading the Dallas Cowboys to a 13-3 record. Will they suffer sophomore slumps or they have another successful season in Dallas?

Backlas: Covering the Ravens this offseason has really sparked my interest in the Jeremy Maclin story. The brutal cut from the Chiefs shortly removed from his wedding was one of the coldest business moves by a team in recent memory. Luckily he landed in Baltimore and the Ravens receiving group looks much stronger because of it.

Erickson: I think that one of the biggest storylines is the Raiders moving to Las Vegas. Even though it will not happen for a few more years, I think that many people are thinking that now finally the Raiders have the roster to make a run in their last few seasons in Oakland. They are going to sign Derek Carr long-term, they brought #BeastMode back, and they appear to be a team fighting for contention. Could they be the team in the AFC to finally challenge the Patriots?

3. For the past two seasons, both Carolina and Atlanta advanced to the Super Bowl when heading into the season, were not expected to do so. What team, that most are not thinking of, has the best chance to do that this year?

Burack: Also, it is important to add, both of them had quarterbacks who won MVP the same year. Another surprise both years. If one is trying to find the team nobody is picking that has a legit shot, it is the New York Giants. The Giants will have one of the best defenses out of all the top NFC teams. The only one that will be better is Seattle; however, with all their offseason distractions, I believe they will fall off a cliff. The Giants have the best wide receiver in the game, sorry Falcon fans. OBJ is a bad man. Now they add Brandon Marshall to help him try to handle his emotions, he may be even better. Drafting Evan Engram just makes the offense more prolific. The Giants also beat the Cowboys twice last year.

Infante: I think that this honor could very well stay in the NFC South with the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. They did a fantastic job of surrounding Jameis Winston with offensive weapons. With DeSean Jackson and O.J. Howard joining the likes of Mike Evans, Cameron Brate, and Doug Martin, they could possibly have one of the best offenses in the league. Although their defense wasn’t spectacular last year, they have a few solid pieces. If sophomores Vernon Hargreaves III and Noah Spence continue to grow, then the Bucs could have an above-average defense next year. They will likely pick up a Wild Card spot, but it wouldn’t be too surprising to see them win the NFC South. Another sleeper could be the New York Giants. They, like the Buccaneers, added two very good weapons for their offense. Brandon Marshall and Evan Engram will join Odell Beckham Jr. and Sterling Shepard in what may be once of the best passing attacks in the league on paper. The Giants had a top 10 defense last year, led by one of the best defensive lines in the NFL. As their young secondary continues to grow, they could climb into the playoffs with a well-rounded team. We’ve seen Eli Manning dominate in the playoffs before. It wouldn’t be a surprise to see him do it again

Molnar: The biggest sleeper in the entire NFL this year has to be the Pittsburgh Steelers. Despite playing in the extremely tough AFC North, Pittsburgh always seems to have solid seasons year in and year out. With Big Ben returning this season despite constant rumors hinting at an impending retirement, the Killer B’s of Pittsburgh should he in full effect. If Bell can continue to rack up the rushing yards while Antonio Brown gets some help in the receiving game, the Steelers could be a shock contender to win the AFC this season and potentially, even the Super Bowl.

Hatten: The Los Angeles Chargers have the twenty-fifth best odds to win the Super Bowl (80/1), but it wouldn’t be crazy to pencil them in as the AFC champion. They have a solid defense, enough offensive weapons, and, most importantly, the best quarterback in the division (Derek Carr is coming off an injury, so I’m slotting him just under Rivers). The Raiders are considered the favorite, but they were weak defensively last season, Kansas City is still rolling out Alex Smith every week, and who knows who’ll be under center in Denver. With good injury luck, don’t be surprised to see the Chargers on top.

Schyvinck: In the AFC, it’s the Chargers. The Titans are too popular coming into the season to come out of nowhere. So, let’s go with the team that picked seventh overall in the draft. The Chargers boast a top level quarterback and plenty of weapons on offense. Melvin Gordon will continue to improve in his third season. Also, rookies Forrest Lamp and Dan Feeney will help an offensive line that has struggled in past seasons. The defense will also be improved. Joey Bosa and Melvin Ingram will dominate off the edge, and they drafted a steal in Desmond King in round five to help out the secondary. When healthy, this is a team to reckon with. In the NFC, the Saints are the team to watch. The NFC South will be tough, but they still have the division’s best quarterback along with a solid offensive line. They can survive without Terron Armstead as long as rookie Ryan Ramczyk is ready to go by week one. Mike Thomas takes on the number one role at receiver, and they have multiple options at running back. The defense will only get better with new additions Marshon Lattimore and Marcus Williams.

Rawls: At the risk of sounding like I’m biased, how ‘bout them Giants? They return nine starters on defense and added weapons on the offensive side of the ball. No one, I mean, no one is going to pick Big Blue to win the Super Bowl but since this is the 10thanniversary of Eighteen And One, it wouldn’t surprise me at all if the Giants make it to Super Bowl LII.

English: I feel that the Carolina Panthers could be the surprise team that no one is thinking of. Last year, the offensive line suffered big injuries, this year they get Matt Kalil at left tackle to support the offensive line. Ron Rivera mentioned that the Panthers were going to try an “evolved offense”. This essentially means that the Panthers are going to rely more on a traditional running game and will probably eliminate the read option. This year, the Panthers are going to also have a ton of veteran leadership. This offseason, they acquired Julius Peppers, Mike Adams, and Captain Munnerlyn. These guys have a ton of experience and know what it takes to win big games. Last year, the Panthers had a Super Bowl Hangover resulting in them to go 6-10. This year, they will have a clean slate to work on. Finally, this Carolina Panthers roster has a lot of talent. When you look at the 2017 roster for the Carolina Panthers, one thing sticks out, it is still very talented. The team is capable of becoming a contender if all the pieces come together and work in unison. The talent is there provided it receives some good coaching.

Glendon: Why not stay in the NFC South for the answer? The Tampa Bay Buccaneers loaded up on offense, adding DeSean Jackson via free agency and tight end O.J. Howard in the draft. The offense looks to be one of the best in the league next year with talented players at all the skill positions. With a growing defense, the Bucs could find some magic and steal the division from the Falcons and make a run in the playoffs.

Ur: The New York Giants aren’t considered a Super Bowl team. However, they definitely should be considered one. They have a stellar defense, great wide receivers, a hall of fame quarterback and just drafted the second best tight end in the draft. They’re a decent running game from being serious contenders.

Backlas: My sneaky pick for the Super Bowl is the Lions. Not to be too much of a homer, but Detroit’s offense can be a force when it is on. And the defense is going to be markedly improved if Darius Slay can stick around all season, alongside a revamped linebacking group. I can’t quite say it will happen, but I definitely can’t say it won’t.

Erickson: The New York Giants aren’t considered a Super Bowl team. However, they definitely should be considered one. They have a stellar defense, great wide receivers, a hall of fame quarterback and just drafted the second best tight end in the draft. They’re a decent running game from being serious contenders.

4. cover32 reported last week Tom Brady is the odds on favorite to win NFL MVP at 4-1 odds, who is your pick?

Burack: Aaron Rodgers is my pick. He is the best in the league. As Stephen A. Smith so eloquently puts it, “He is a baaadddd man”. Oh, is he ever, Just look at what this guy did the second half of last season up until the Dallas game. When he faced Atlanta in the NFC Championship Game, both of his top targets Jordy Nelson and Davante Adams were far from even 80%. Rodgers should not only be the favorite for this award, in my opinion, he should be the heavy favorite. He also gets a little weapon known as Martellus Bennett.

Infante: I actually have a feeling that Derek Carr could defy the odds and have an MVP-caliber season. The only reason the Oakland Raiders lost in the Wild Card round was that he was sidelined with a broken fibula. He has great weapons around him, an elite offensive line and an improved defense. With the Chiefs looking slightly worse than they did last season and the Broncos in a state of quarterback bedlam, Oakland looks prime to take the AFC West crown. Carr has the talent, as well as the talent around him, to help make the Raiders elite, and winning himself the MVP in the process.

Molnar: The NFL MVP this season will be either Ben Roethlisberger or Aaron Rodgers. In the case of both quarterbacks, their play will be extremely important to the overall success of the team. Unlike Brady who has been named the favorite, both Pittsburgh and Green Bay would be far worse off without their respective quarterbacks. That said, for either to have a really good chance at earning the MVP Trophy in 2017, both will need to lead their teams to division titles and potentially deep playoff runs. Much like last year when Matt Ryan won the award, Roethlisberger and Rodgers may even need to lead their respective teams to a Super Bowl appearance in order to win the award.

Hatten: It’s got to be Brady. Outside of Rodgers and Ryan, most of the top favorites are locks to come up short. I will throw a dark horse in there though: Jameis Winston. Most people don’t realize, but the Bucs went 9-7 last season, only the second season after taking him first overall (they were very bad in 2015). He has some things to work on (long distance accuracy, not forcing the ball), but he’s a very confident guy who his teammates will follow anywhere (luckily the Tampa area is relatively flat).

Schyvinck: The MVP favorite never seems to win. Nobody had Matt Ryan as the top candidate in 2016. This time, a two-time winner gets his third. Aaron Rodgers, with new additions and an evolving offense, will pick up where he left off after running the table last year in the regular season. His 40 touchdowns led the league last season, and he’s primed to do it again.

Rawls: Brady might have the easiest path to the MVP. We can spot the Patriots six wins off the rip because of playing the Bills, Dolphins, and Jets. In their other ten games, there are only two (against the Raiders in Mexico City, at the Steelers) where they could potentially lose. If they go 14-2, Brady will get the MVP unless someone else does something historic…and that might be pushing it.

English: Let’s be real, Tom Brady has the best odds to win MVP by far. The NFL is a passing league and there may be no more skilled passer than Tom Brady. The New England Patriots quarterback continues to spit in the face of Father Time and cement himself in the conversation of greatest ever.

Glendon: If it wasn’t for missing a quarter of the season in 2016, Tom Brady would have won his third MVP. He will not miss out this time. He is the best QB on the best team, which is a huge factor in MVP voting. He has an absurd amount of talent on the offensive side of the ball and should push his career highs in passing yards and touchdowns. Another unanimous MVP win would not be out of the question.

Ur: Tom Brady is my pick for NFL MVP. He has the talent to make it work. Not only that, but he has several wide receivers to make it happen, including former New Orleans Saints wide receiver Brandin Cooks.

Backlas: Lest we forget Matt Stafford’s run at an MVP last season. For the majority of the season, Stafford was one of the top contenders for the award. This season, with an improved defense giving him the ball more, his second season without Megatron will be his best. Also, it is a contract year for what it’s worth.

Erickson: Raiders quarterback Derek Carr. Dude is going to go off! So many weapons and if he stays healthy? Look out!

5. Make one bold prediction for the 2017 season.

Burack: Hmm, how about this, TOM BRADY DECLINES. Yes, you read that right. That is right, I said it. Now listen, This is not a shot at Brady. Not a single player has yet beat father time. “Well, Bobby, did you not see him in the Super Bowl?” Yes, I did, I also saw Peyton Manning have one of the greatest seasons ever in 2013 breaking all sorts of records, and by mid-season the following year, he was no longer the same guy. I also saw Brett Farve have his best season ever in 2009, a year later, he broke down physically. The point is, these things do not happen gradually, one day you are great the next you are not. Brady is next!

Infante: The New England Patriots will not win the AFC East. Just kidding. Even I’m not that stupid. I will say, though, that this will be the year that the Tennessee Titans take a step into elite territory. With the additions of weapons like Corey Davis, Eric Decker and the criminally underrated Taywan Taylor, their offense is just about complete. Their defense was decent last year, but they managed to make it better by adding Logan Ryan, Johnathan Cyprien and Adoree’ Jackson to their secondary. I predict that they win will the AFC South (by a bigger margin than many expect), and will finally be taken seriously as a threat to the AFC crown.

Molnar: The Atlanta Falcons will not make the playoffs this season. Playing in the famous NFC South division, not only will the Falcons feel the after effects of last season’s Super Bowl collapse but the team will fail to make the postseason. Finishing third in the division — tied with the Saints — Atlanta will be forced to watch as both the Tampa Bay Buccaneers and Carolina Panthers make the postseason. While it would be a major shock for many NFL experts, how many times in the modern era have we seen the NFC South be turned a topsy-turvy year in and year out? Mark it down now, Atlanta will miss the playoffs in 2017.

Hatten: The Falcons will miss the playoffs. I don’t think they will tailspin into Panther territory (they could still go 9-7, 10-6 and lose a tiebreaker situation like the Bucs last season), but it’s extremely difficult to bounce back after gift wrapping a Lombardi Trophy to someone else. This team is built to take the lead and rush, but they just lost the best offensive coordinator in the NFL in Kyle Shanahan. They will take a step back offensively. Against the wrong team (e.g. the Patriots), that defense can get ground down and not be able to play to its’ strength.

Schyvinck: The Atlanta Falcons return to the NFC Championship game. The Super Bowl hangover is common, but the NFC is wide open this season. They could easily win the division if the Super Bowl loss doesn’t linger with them. Their roster only gets better, and the offensive pieces are still in place. They reinforced their group in the trenches as well. This group has the swagger and the roster to make another deep run.

Rawls: I think the Dallas Cowboys will get exposed. Last season, no one saw them coming. Romo is gone and now it’s the Dak Prescott and Ezekiel Elliott Show. I think they will get hit with the sophomore jinx and they won’t be as good as they were last year now that we have a season’s worth of game tape.

English: My bold prediction for the NFL season is that Philip Rivers will have the best season of his career. After a 5-11 record and both a league and career high 21 interceptions, 2016 was one of River’s’ worst campaigns. With that said, expect him to come out firing in 2017 and ready to prove that he’s still “got it”. In order for this to happen, however, Keenan Allen will need to not tear his ACL in week one, and Mike Williams will have to play like a No. 7 overall draft pick. Also, Antonio Gates will need to be his old reliable self.

Glendon: The Tennessee Titans will win the AFC South over the Colts and Texans. The Texans may have the best defense in the division, perhaps the league, but the Titan’s are going to make some noise this year and steal the division from both. The Texans will be a wildcard team. Of course, you can always read my ’10 Bold Predictions’ for the Patriots season.

Ur: Every team in the NFC East will finish with 10 wins. All four teams have so much talent on offense. The winner of the division could depend on head-to-head matchups.

Backlas: Detroit for the Super Bowl is already a pretty crazily bold pick, but on top of that Green Bay will finish in third in the NFC North. Detroit and Minnesota will battle for the division crown while an aging Rogers without a running game will get pummeled by weakening offensive line across from a defense filled with holes. Green Bay’s reign of terror is over, praise the sun!

Erickson: Jay Ajayi will lead the NFL in rushing yards. In games where Ajayi got the ball the Dolphins won and in games he did not get the ball? Well…they lost. Ajayi is going to get a lot of volume with carries this season.

6. Okay, now it is only June but never too early. Right now, who will be in the Super Bowl this year, and who wins?

Burack: On February 4, 2018, at U.S. Bank Stadium in Minneapolis, Minnesota, on NBC, it will be The Pittsburgh Steelers and the Dallas Cowboys meet in an epic showdown. As long as Le’Veon Bell does not get hurt in the first quarter against a broken-down Tom Brady (look at the question above for an explanation), the Steelers will be back. Yes, the Patriots will still be in the AFC Championship Game. They still have a loaded football team. In the NFC it comes down to this, the Cowboys are simply better than the rest. They have an offensive line for the ages. Dak and Zeke will be even better. The Packers still do not address their defense. Atlanta, sorry, the hangover is real. The Cowboys will have a tough time against the Giants but will ultimately get it done behind clutch plays by Dak.

Infante: Unfortunately, I think it will come down to the New England Patriots and the Dallas Cowboys. Although I personally dislike both teams, I feel that those two teams are arguably the most complete in the league right now. Luckily for the NFL, these two teams are arguably the most popular in the league today. In a Super Bowl that will become the most-watched television event in U.S. history, the Patriots will pick up yet another ring, cementing Tom Brady’s status as the greatest of all time.

Molnar: Playing in the Super Bowl this year will be the NFC Champion Green Bay Packers and the AFC Champion Oakland Raiders. Green Bay barn rushes their way through the playoff this year thanks to their explosive offense and some more Hail-Rodgers moments. Oakland, on the other hand, finds redemption as Derek Carr bounces back and leads the Raiders to an emotional Super Bowl appearance. In the end, though, Aaron Rodgers proves to be a man on a mission and leads the Packers to a Super Bowl win in the stadium that houses their NFC rival Vikings.

Hatten: I guess I should have put this under biggest surprise, but the Minnesota Vikings will play the Patriots at home (for the first time by any team). Bradford is an average quarterback who is capable of going “Flacco,” they have an elite defense to carry him during his valleys, and Dalvin Cook will be the offensive rookie of the year (even if he loses the award to someone *cough* Fournette *cough* with more hype). Cook was able to make Florida State’s horrendous offensive line look average, and he’ll do the same in Minnesota. The defense and running game lead the Vikings to their first Super Bowl win and Minneapolis will be razed to the ground.

Schyvinck: It is hard to pick against the Patriots but I’ll be a little different. The Steelers will face off against the Giants. Pittsburgh has the offense to play with the Patriots, but they need home field advantage. Let’s say they do it, and their young defenders improve enough to win a tight one. The Giants improved on offense, adding Brandon Marshall and Evan Engram. Their front will still be dominant, and they have an excellent secondary. The Giants end up victorious in this battle, as defense wins championships.

Rawls: The New York Giants and New England Patriots will meet in Super Bowl LII, a Giants victory. It will be No. 10’s third Super Bowl, placing an exclamation point on a Hall of Fame career, and put another blemish on the Evil Empire’s record.

English: Super Bowl LII: New England Patriots vs. Green Bay Packers. The epic matchup between Tom Brady and Aaron Rodgers. The record between these two future hall of fame quarterbacks is 1-1. After this game, Tom Brady will have the edge at 2-1. The Patriots are the juggernauts of the NFL, no team in the AFC can stop them (except maybe the Steelers). If the Packers can stay healthy, they will have a huge chance at making the Super Bowl. Aaron Rodgers is still going strong, and now with new tight end Martellus Bennett, there will be no way to stop Aaron Rodgers in the NFC. In the Super Bowl though, Tom Brady and the Patriots will edge out the Packers. Super Bowl XXXI between the Packers and Patriots featured Drew Bledsoe vs Brett Favre. This Super Bowl will be even more epic with Aaron Rodgers and Tom Brady.

Glendon: Every year since 1997, I’ve wanted to see the Packers-Patriots in the Super Bowl once more. Who wouldn’t? We would get to see Tom Brady and Aaron Rodgers square off on the biggest stage. However, for the 20th year in-a-row, it will not be. In Minnesota, we will see the Patriots successfully defend their title against… the New York Giants.

Ur: The New England Patriots will meet the Green Bay Packers in Super Bowl LII. New England’s defense will lead them to their second consecutive Super Bowl. Tom Brady will also win his sixth title.

Backlas: I am sticking with my original pick from the NFC, Detroit. They will face off against the best Raiders team we have seen in a long time. Don’t worry New Englanders you will at least make it to the AFC championship game, but Derek Carr and the return of Marshawn Lynch will face off with Detroit next February. Ultimately Oakland will get one last ring before moving on to Las Vegas.

Erickson: Patriots versus the Packers. A rematch of the 1998 Super Bowl. The face-off between the two greatest players to wear the number twelve. Who wins? Patriots of course.

The post cover32 NFL Season Preview Roundtable appeared first on Cover32.

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junker-town · 7 years ago

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NFL Panic Index 2017, Week 11: Injuries may derail Cowboys’ entire season

The Seahawks are pretty much in the same boat.

The Cowboys missed Ezekiel Elliott against the Falcons in Week 10. But they missed left tackle Tyron Smith even more, and it showed.

You’ve got to expect some lapses when a backup takes over on Dak Prescott’s blind side while the best left tackle in the league is sidelined with groin and back injuries. But nobody expected Chaz Green to be quite as bad as he was. Green was benched after giving up four of Adrian Clayborn’s six sacks on Sunday. His replacement, Byron Bell, promptly gave up another one after taking over for Green.

And the worst news for Dallas is that Smith may not be ready to go this week against the high-flying Eagles. And they have another glaring hole on the other side of the ball, with linebacker Sean Lee out with a hamstring injury he suffered in Week 3 against the Cardinals.

Having Lee out against the Eagles’ offense is the worst-case scenario for the Cowboys. Philadelphia has the second-best scoring offense in the league with 31.4 points per game. Dallas will particularly miss Lee when the Eagles are running the ball. Philadelphia’s ground attack is ranked fourth in the NFL and averaging 136.8 yards per game.

Panic index: Dak Prescott has proven that he can generally keep the Cowboys competitive. But with Elliott still out serving his six-game suspension and the Cowboys missing key players on both sides of the ball, it’s a rough time to have to face the division rival that just happens to be the best team in the NFC.

Injuries may ruin the Seahawks’ shot at the playoffs

The Seahawks are 6-3 and in the mix in the NFC. But injuries to key players on both sides of the ball raise questions about whether or not Seattle can keep pace in the conference.

Last Thursday’s win over the Cardinals was particularly devastating. All-Pro cornerback Richard Sherman was lost for the rest of the season with a ruptured Achilles. Left tackle Duane Brown, starting his second game for Seattle after being acquired from Houston before the trade deadline, left the game with an ankle injury. His status for Sunday’s game against the Falcons is uncertain.

Earl Thomas may make it back for Week 11 after being sidelined with a hamstring injury for the Seahawks’ last two games. Kam Chancellor’s status is up in the air after suffering a stinger against the Cardinals. Running back Chris Carson has been on injured reserve, but is a candidate to return. Left guard Luke Joeckel has been out recovering from minor knee surgery. Both may be able to play this week, but there’s no guarantee.

And even if Duane Brown and Joeckel are both healthy enough to play, it may make for a shaky left side of the line against a Falcons defense that sacked Dak Prescott eight times last week.

Panic index: The Seahawks need to keep pace with the 7-2 Rams. That’s going to be a much bigger challenge with so many key players banged up. Might be time to panic.

The Bills’ playoff drought will tack on another year

It was only two weeks ago when the Bills were 5-2, and looking like they might actually be able to challenge the Patriots in the AFC East.

Early season wins against the Broncos and Falcons impressed, but the Bills have lost consecutive games to the Jets and Saints. Neither game was really close, either.

“We haven’t given the fans a lot to be excited about the last two weeks,” center Eric Wood said, via WGR 550 Sports Radio. He added, “It’s a long season and we’ve played good ball this year so we can’t go into the tank at this point. We’re sitting at 5-4. We have a lot of football ahead of us and a great opportunity still.”

The Bills still have to play the Patriots twice, in Weeks 13 and 16. They also have to travel to Kansas City and play the Dolphins twice. That’s not exactly an easy slate of games.

Panic index: They’re still in the playoff hunt, but we know how this movie ends — at home watching other teams play in January and February.

Tom Savage vs. Blaine Gabbert is the QB matchup we never wanted

There are very few, if any, quarterback matchups that you could conceive that would be less watchable than this one. The Texans and Cardinals are facing off in Week 11. A few weeks ago, we’d be looking forward to Deshaun Watson attempt to go after Patrick Peterson. Now, we get to watch Tom Savage do his “best.”

To show the difference in the Texans’ offense:

Texans offense by QB: * Deshaun Watson - 5.8 yards per play * Tom Savage - 3.8 yards per play That gap is greater than the difference between the best offense (Chiefs) and worst offense (Ravens) in the NFL on a per play basis.

— Paul Hembekides (@PaulHembo) November 14, 2017

Drew Stanton, who is already filling in for Carson Palmer, injured his knee against the Seahawks, and he’s questionable to play against the Texans. That would leave us with Blaine Gabbert and his 56 percent career completion rate.

Panic index: There’s still a chance Stanton plays, but even that’s not a whole lot more intriguing than the worst case scenario.

The Lions almost lost to the Browns

The final score is deceiving: 38-24 looks like a comfortable win. The type of victory that no one was sweating too much, but there’s still enough to work on in practice later that week. Instead, the Lions only managed to pull away from the winless Browns late. At home.

The Browns were up 10-0 early, their biggest lead of the season. The score probably should have been tied at half, if not for some major Brownsing happening right before the break that can be summed up with this Hue Jackson GIF:

The Browns even held a lead late in the third quarter, until the Lions tied it up right before the final period, denying Cleveland its first fourth-quarter lead of the season. Then DeShone Kizer, in the midst of his best game as a pro, exited for a few drives, essentially quashing any hope the Browns had at ending all those 0-16 jokes the Lions know far too well.

So even though the Lions got back above .500 with the win, and even though they’re still in striking distance of a wild card spot, how pleased can they be? The Vikings keep rolling and have a two-game lead in the NFC North. The Packers are right there with the Lions at 5-4, despite the absence of Aaron Rodgers.

Detroit gave up 201 rushing yards to Cleveland and needed a signature Matthew Stafford fourth-quarter comeback to beat the worst team in the NFL, in a month that Jim Caldwell owns (yes really).

Maybe it was an off day, it happens. But it was basically what you’d expect a battle of two teams that have never played in a Super Bowl would look like.

Panic index: Forget about Sunday, Lions. Time to win your first championship in 60 years. The soccer world has foretold it.

The last time Italy didn’t make the World Cup, the reigning NFL champions were...the Detroit Lions.

— Paul Carr (@PCarrESPN) November 13, 2017

Yes, Italy will miss the 2018 World Cup, a good omen for the Lions right when they needed it most.

Ben McAdoo has no shame

After following up an embarrassing week of losing to the Rams 51-17, the Giants topped it! They lost to the previously winless 49ers, 31-21.

Ben McAdoo’s reaction? Well... it might not be as strong as you’d expect for a coach whose team is now 1-8.

“I’m not embarrassed by this team,” he said.

He might not be embarrassed, but he might be feeling the heat. He got the dreaded vote of confidence this week from owner John Mara and GM Steve Tisch:

"Ben McAdoo is our head coach and has our support. We are in the midst of an extremely disappointing season. Our performance this year, particularly the past two weeks, is inexcusable and frustrating. While we appreciate that our fans are unhappy with what has occurred, nobody is more upset than we are.

“Our plan is to do what we have always done, which is to not offer a running commentary on the season. It is our responsibility to determine the reasons for our poor performance and at the end of the year, we will evaluate the 2017 season in its entirety and make a determination on how we move forward.”

They gave him the vote of confidence, while also not committing to him next year.

Panic index: If you’re a Giants fan, this nightmare is your life now. At least for seven more games. You could panic, or be happy about your future high draft choice.

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flauntpage · 7 years ago

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Ranking Every NFL Team's Super Bowl Chances

You're right, but those teams are great for the purpose of making jokes.

Let's get right into it, because 32 is a lot of teams.

32. San Francisco 49ers (0-8) — lmao

31. Cleveland Browns (0-8) — lol

23. Cincinnati Bengals (3-4) — Say it out loud: "Andy Dalton, Super Bowl champion." Yeah, never gonna happen.

18. Denver Broncos (3-3) — You lose at home to the Giants by 13 points, I don't understand why you even show up for the rest of your games.

Ranking Every NFL Team's Super Bowl Chances published first on http://ift.tt/2pLTmlv

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