#strange things like being honest or something i dunno
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we're in end game territory for the DND group and the party is having these moments that are really fluffy and cute but they are going to get someone murdered tragically the next day. We're all living for it really. Niall belongs 2 ( @immortanjill )
#ocs#brynn#D&D#niall#talking to someone through the dream spell combined with the end of the world does things to an introvert#strange things like being honest or something i dunno#now they have to not die thats easy enough#IF SOME PARTY MEMBERS KNOW HE WILL NEVER HEAR THE END OF IT @_@
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Work Wife - Three
Masterlist
Summary: Working as a Secretary and Miller & Sons Construction, you fall hopelessly in love with the eldest son Joel. What you don’t realise is that Joel’s completely in love with you too. What will it take for the two of you to realise whats’s right in front of you?
Pairing: Young Joel Miller x Reader
Warnings: Like AO3, I choose not to give any so the plot isn’t spoiled. This fic is 18+ (update… hopw you like 🙈)
Series Masterlist - One Two
You smiled as you entered the lounge and found Joel fast asleep on the couch. 3 weeks had passed since Sarah had been thrust into his arms by Eliza and he had been left to face parenthood alone. You had been amazed at how quickly Joel had taken to being a father. He was a natural with her and no job seemed to phase him but he had called on you for support on the days when nothing he did seemed to calm her cries. You had turned up that evening to a screaming Sarah and a sobbing Joel and without a moment's hesitation, you had taken her from him and ordered him to go and take a shower whilst you got her settled and down for bed. Now, after an hour of erratic feeding, nappy changes and endless hiccups, you found yourself nudging his shoulder in an attempt to wake him so that you could lead him to bed.
"Come on, let's get you to bed." You said softly as you managed to get him to sit up.
"Baby down?" He asked and you gave him a soft 'yeah' before helping him to his feet "Thank you." He said sleepily as the two of you shuffled up the stairs and towards his room, creeping in quietly so you didn't wake the baby.
You helped relieve him of his boots as he stripped off his shirt and jeans, leaving him in just a vest and his briefs as he collapsed onto his bed. You blushed, averting your eyes before standing abruptly and making for the door, only to be stopped by Joel grabbing your elbow.
"Where you goin'?" He mumbled, so quietly that you almost missed what he had said.
"I need to go home, Joel." You replied softly "It's late."
"Stay here." You startled at this, eyes snapping to him and you noted that he was looking straight at you.
"Joel, you don't have room for me to crash here." You stated and he chuckled.
"Got room right here." He said as he patted the empty bed beside him "Come on. It's late and you shouldn't be drivin'tired."
"I dunno, Joel." You mumbled but he was having none of it.
"Get into bed before I drag you in." Your core clenched at the insinuation.
You knew he didn't mean anything sexual by his threat. He was simply offering to let you stay with him after helping him get Sarah settled and down for bed. After a few more minutes of quiet contemplation, you shrugged off your cardigan and climbed onto the bed beside Joel. Laying down on the plush pillow that clearly hadn't been used much since he'd purchased it.
"G'night." He mumbled before drifting off, leaving you to study his sleeping face.
You had strangely enjoyed the last three weeks. Helping Joel with Sarah had brought the two of you closer together again but one thing that still hung over your head like an anvil was your confession.
3 weeks ago you had confessed to Joel that you were in love with him and you were sure that he had heard you. Judging by the flicker of surprise that had spread across his features, he had. However, since then neither of you had spoken about it. Something that you were secretly glad of.
Simon had not spoken to you since the breakup. He avoided you like the plague, only speaking to you when he needed to know if there would be any calls or meetings that day.
Joel's father had given him 6 weeks paternity leave so Simon had temporarily taken the wheel in the younger Miller's absence. He was nothing but curt and cordial to you which you supposed to a degree was better than him spreading toxic rumours around the office.
So the fact that Joel hadn't mentioned your confession really was a relief if you were being truly honest with yourself. You weren't sure you could face any more rejection for a while.
Joel however couldn't stop thinking about your admission. It had been living rent-free in his head since the day you'd uttered those words. It was all he'd ever wanted to hear you say and if circumstances were different he would be dragging you out for date after date. Only now he had a daughter to think of. She needed to be his number-one priority.
Pursuing a relationship with you, although it's all he has ever wanted since he met you, was not high on his list of priorities at that moment in time. He had a three-week-old newborn that he had to take care of and that meant that his feelings for you had to take a back seat for now.
He just hoped that by the time he could address his feelings, he wasn't too late.
...
The following morning Joel woke to an empty bed. His hand scraped against the cool, crisp sheets and he wondered if he had dreamt of your staying there with him. Rolling onto his side, he looked down at the bassinet beside him, only to find that empty also and in a moment of pure panic, he leapt from the bed and flew down the stairs, calling for Sarah as he stumbled to a stop in the kitchen. There you stood, pouring coffee into two mugs as you bounced Sarah gently in the wrap strapped to your front. You looked so natural with little Sarah strapped to you. Your head shot up a moment later and you smiled at his bedraggled state before kissing Sarah's crown as you grabbed both the mugs up and walked towards Joel.
"Morning sleepy." You chuckled as you handed Joel the coffee you had made him "Sorry if we freaked you out. Sarah started fussing but I thought I'd let you sleep in so I changed her and brought her down for her bottle." You looked down at the baby in question who was cooing against your chest "We've had fun haven't we Princess?"
Joel didn't think about what he did next. In the blink of an eye, his coffee was placed on the kitchen table and his lips were on yours. He wasn't sure what had possessed him to kiss you but at that moment in time, it seemed like the right thing to do. As quickly as it started though, he was pulling away and fumbling for something to say.
"That's one way for you to thank me for letting you sleep in." You chuckled shyly and Joel continued to flounder for a moment before he finally said something.
"Sorry... I'm not quite sure why I did that." He scratched the back of his neck nervously "Guess we can blame the sleep deprivation." He finished with a chuckle.
Your stomach sank. You fought not to let your disappointment show on your face but as your eyes started to sting from the tears developing in them, you knew you needed to come up with an excuse to leave.
"I should get going." You said as you started to unwrap Sarah from your chest, placing her in the bassinet that was set up in the corner of the kitchen.
"I-"
"Your mum called whilst you were sleeping. She said she'll pop around this evening to help with Sarah if you need her."
"Oh, right." He said, failing to keep his disappointment out of his tone.
"I have plans this evening otherwise you know I would be here to help with this perfect little princess." You cooed as you pecked her brow.
"Plans?" He enquired and you nodded as you grabbed your bag.
"Just some drinks with a friend." You replied, "He's back from College for the summer and wants to hook up."
"You're not old enough to drink!" He blurted out and you snorted at his statement.
"Okay, Dad." You replied with a roll of your eyes "Drinks are on him anyway so..."
"Right." Joel felt like he couldn't breathe. This was his worst nightmare coming to life.
"Anyway, I'll see you later." You said finally as you made your way to the front door, waving at him and Sarah as you opened the door.
"Thank you again. For all your help with Sarah." You nodded and gave him a small smile before disappearing through the door.
Joel stood there staring after you, a hand scraping over his face as he tried to steady his breathing. He knew he'd fucked up by kissing you this morning. He knew that your leaving was to get away from him but learning that you were meeting a guy for drinks later was eating him up inside. He knew he needed to talk to you about your confession but the longer you both went without talking about it the harder it became.
Perhaps these drinks were your way of trying to get over him and that thought killed him. All he wanted to do was embrace your feelings for him and walk off into the sunset but he needed to be focused on Sarah. He didn't know what he'd do if you and he didn't work.
Perhaps it was better if he just let you go.
...
Three weeks later...
Joel's first day back at work was hell. His mum was taking care of Sarah for the time being until they found a nanny. Everyone that Joel had interviewed so far just hadn't felt right. He wasn't really sure what he was looking for but he knew that the six women he had interviewed so far weren't it. He missed his daughter and lost count of the number of times he had rung his mum to check in.
You'd been sat at the front desk, like you always were when he walked through the door that morning, talking to one of the new apprentices that Joel's father had taken on in his absence and despite Joel knowing it was unreasonable, he already felt jealous of how you smiled at this guy too.
You had continued to help him with Sarah in the weeks that had followed him kissing you. Neither you nor he had brought it up and you hadn't spoken about your confession either. Despite trying to ignore his gnawing feelings, he had done his best to pretend like the tension between the two of you wasn't killing him. Sure enough, he learned from Suzzy, the office gossip and part-time accountant that you and your 'friend' had hooked up after drinks. You had apparentlyassured her that it was just a one-time thing. After one too many drinks, the two of you had confessed that you'd both always found each other attractive and so one thing led to another and you'd found him back at your place and christening your new couch.
You hadn't talked to Joel about it though. You weren't sure how he felt and he still hadn't brought up the kiss or your confession. You felt like perhaps you should just move on. He was clearly trying to let you down gently by not mentioning any of it so perhaps the suggestion Ant had made to have a friend-with-benefits situation was a good one. He had proposed it after the two of you had slept together after drinks. You both enjoyed the sex but agreed that a relationship wasn't what either of you was looking for. As you looked at Joel who gave you a meek smile before scuttering away into his office you decided that you were going to call Ant after you finished work and take him up on his offer.
You needed to get over Joel.
...
Joel was sipping at his coffee whilst Simon and the new apprentice Caleb chatted about you. In the last week, Simon had seemed to soften to you again. Joel had wondered if the two of you had talked.
"So you dated her but broke up 'cus she's sweet on the boss?" Caleb asked and Simon nodded "That's shit man, I'm sorry."
"Nah, we're okay now." Simon replied and Joel's ears perked up "We're friends. Just wasn't meant to be I guess but I fell hard for her man. Girl's incredible."
"Miller sweet on her too?" Caleb asked a little quieter but Joel heard him.
"Dunno." Simon replied with a shrug "I thought that maybe at one point he was. She was practically his work wife. The two of them were inseparable but since he had a baby, things have been different between them."
Joel looked at Simon as he thought about what the man had just said. Was it that obvious to everyone that the dynamic between the two of you had changed? You were still over a lot to help with Sarah but he never asked you to anymore. It was always off your own back and he knew that it wasn't really for him anymore but because you wanted to spend time with Sarah. Your face lit up every time you were in her presence and he knew that one day you would make an amazing mum.
Part of him hoped that he would be the one to make you one.
But he knew that probably wasn't ever going to happen. The longer things went on the way they were, the less likely the two of you would find your way back to each other. He only had himself to blame for that.
"Well, maybe she'll end up dating that Ant guy she hooked up with." Caleb chuckled and Simon punched him playfully.
"You're a worse gossip than Suzzy." Simon chuckled and Calel shrugged.
"She's the one who told me." Caleb confessed, "Said that apparently, they're fucking casually now."
"I wouldn't believe everything Suzzy tells you." Simon chuckled "Woman loves to blow shit out of proportion."
"Right, let's get back to work lads." Piped up Joel, no longer wanting to listen to their conversation.
But he couldn't help but wonder if what Caleb had said about you and that Ant guy was true. He really hoped it wasn't.
...
You chuckled as Ant placed sensual kisses down your neck and along your shoulder whilst you poured you both some coffee. Your core clenched as he placed a kiss on the spot behind your ear that he'd discovered the night before made you whimper.
"Ant." You whined as his hands started to wander "I'm pouring coffee."
"Needs time to cool down." He purred in your ear and you chuckled.
.
Joel was hysterical. No matter what he did, Sarah would not stop screaming. She had woken with a fever and a hacking cough and after trying to call his mum, did he remember that she and his dad had gone to visit his Grandma in Houston. So, in pure desperation he dialed your number, praying that you were home. The phone rang a few times before someone answered.
"Hey, I need-" He didn't get to finish his sentence before you hung up.
.
The phone started to ring just as Ant's hand slipped into your underwear and his deft fingers began to circle your clit. You whined, your core aching and needy.
"One sec." Ant rumbled into your ear before grabbing your phone.
"She's busy." Was all he said before he slammed it down on its cradle again.
You gasped as he spun you around and kissed you hard, pushing your underwear to one side before plunging his fingers into your core.
"Now where were we."
...
You wrestled with the bag of supplies you had in one arm as you opened Joel's front door with the key he'd had cut for you.
"Joel." You called out, not too loud in case Sarah was asleep "I brought supplies."
You found an empty house.
Confusion filled your features as you walked into the kitchen to see that Joel wasn't there either.
"Joel?" You called out but there was still no answer.
Something gnawed at you. It was early so you couldn't think where Joel and Sarah would be at this hour. You walked to the kitchen and dialled the number for Joel's parent's house, sighing when no one answered. You tried one more time before remembering that they were away and then you started to panic. Where was he?
Your head jumped up at the sound of the front door opening and you sprinted into the lounge, breathing a sigh of relief when Joel appeared through the door. It took you a moment to realise Sarah wasn't with him.
"Where's the baby?" You asked and Joel looked at you with an expression that made your blood go cold.
'I tried calling you." He said coldly and your brows drew together.
"I uh-"
"You hung up." He interrupted and you tried to swallow the lump in your throat "Sarah had a fever." He continued "Real bad one. She kept coughin' and screaming and her fever just kept climbin'" He choked on the last part of that sentence and you felt your pulse start to race as you and he held each other's gazes.
"Where's Sarah?" You asked again, your voice shaking.
"She's in the NICU." He stated and you sobbed "Doc says it's whooping cough. She's real sick with it..." He trailed off and you couldn't stop the tears "They're doin' everything they can but..." He broke down then, unable to finish his sentence and you scaled the room swiftly, wrapping your arms around him and letting him sob into your sweater.
"It's going to be okay Joel." You said as you held him, gently stroking his hair.
"I needed you." He sobbed and your heart shattered.
He pulled back to look at you, eyes bloodshot and still full of tears.
"I needed you and you just hung up on me."
"It wasn't me it was Ant." You confessed and Joel felt sick.
"Right." He said as he pulled away and took a few steps back "I think you should go." He said as he looked away from you and to the groceries that you'd clearly brought for him.
"Joel-"
"I need to shower and get back to the hospital."
"Let me come with you." You pleaded but he shook his head.
"I'd rather you didn't." He said bluntly and you winced as he said "Besides, you should get back to whatever it was that made you too busy to answer the phone whilst my daughter was dying in my arms."
"That's not fair." You growled in retort "I didn't know-"
"You said that I could call you day or night and you'd be here for us." He growled and you shrank back "Well news flash... We needed you but you were too busy fucking your new boy toy to give a shit about either of us."
You didn't hide the hurt his statement inflicted on you.
"Fuck you." You growled as you grabbed your bag and left, the door slamming in your wake. Joel jumped at the sound, sobbing again as soon as he heard your car's engine start and pull away.
He knew he hadn't been fair to you. He hadn't really meant what he said but he was angry and lost.
He simply didn't know what to do.
Next
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#joel miller#joel miller fanfiction#joel miller fanfic#joel miller the last of us#last of us#the last of us#pedro pascal character fanfiction#pedro pascal characters#pedro pascal#pedro pascal gif#joel miller x reader#joel miller x you#the last of us fanfiction#last of us fanfiction
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Written ver under the cut :)
[*intro*]
Charlie: What do you remember her looking like?
Grizzly: Well back in highschool, she had very straight long black hair.. Very, know you, like pale skin like.... *fades out*
Kian: You know, nothing changes! (she hasn't changed)
[Kiss me (kiss me), down by the broken treehouse.]
Becky: I didn't uh, I didn't know you'd be here either! I was just..back for the weekend visiting my parents.
[Swing me (swing me), upon its hanging tire.]
Becky: But uh, shit, we' got a lot of catching up to do, huh?
[Bring bring (bring bring), bring your flower hat, we'll take the trail marked on your father's map.]
Kian: 'Actually got invited to a.. You know, sort of a party for tonight if you uh wanna head over there. ..you know, with me?
[Ooo~!]
Becky: Yeah.
[Kiss me, down by the faded warnings.]
Becky: I'm... Supposed to be spending the weekend with my parents but..
Kian: Fuck it right?
[Lead me, out through the crumbling wall.]
Becky: Honestly, they're- Yeah, they're treating me like I'm um, like I'm in highschool again. *chuckles*
[Lift the barricade.]
Becky: So.. I'd really like that
[Strike up the band and make the blowflies dance..]
Kian: Alright, yeah, let's uh.. Let's fucking do it then!
[..SILVER MOON'S DARKENING...]
Kian: See where the night takes us!
Becky: Let's do it.
[..so kiss me.]
[*chipper tune plays*]
Kian: Y-Yo-u just end up wak-wa ki n g next to some b-b-b-bodies that that that you forget in a few ho u h ours. fa ce- You know faces pass but..
Becky: ..faces pass, 《but hey you're home bound》. *she will not be leaving galloway*
[*song sounds stranger in tone*]
[Kiss me (kiss me), besides the melting tree stumps.]
Kian: I dunno ha-ha-have.... Since you've been home for the weekend,
[Kiss me (kiss me), down on the dead grey grass.]
Kian: -has anything been like weird for you like..? Anything feel strange.?
[Sniff sniff (sniff sniff), it smells so sickly sweet, but everywhere I turn there's ROTTING MEAT..]
Charlie: You can tell she's trying to play it kind of cool but li-like... She seems a little awkward about something.
Becky: Kian Stone.. You nervous?
[Ooo~!]
[Kiss me, down by the bubbling crow skulls.]
Kian: You know for old time's sake, you wanna take a walk? You know, down to Willot street? *he wants to believe*
[Kiss me, beneath the black wet chains.]
Kian: Like we used to, you know. That's kind of what I came here for if you- I-If you're-
[It's impossible..?]
Becky: Yeah!
Kian: Oh you're down? Cool!
Becky: Yeah! Okay, okay.. *she knows she shouldn't*
[I hear the voice of long-dead loved ones calling to leave quickly...]
Becky: Oh man.. Well 《at least there's one good thing》 about being back!
Kian: I'll say...
[..so kiss me.]
[*ominous interlude*]
Becky: *lets out a snicker, sounding like she's working herself up to tearing up* You know shit just happened and i i i i t kept happening and I I I.. You know, 《SIGNED ON》 with -> s o m e th i n g <- sh[] y (I) shouldn't of and t h e e n-n... I guess I got so caught up in it all.
[Kiss me (hold me), (hold me) the air got cold so quickly (kiss me).]
Becky: Eventually I- I figured it out.. But um... *she hesitates*
[Kiss me (hold me), perhaps we should go in (kiss me).]
Charlie: I-It's quiet. And you feel your eyes pull back to hers.
[Wait wait!! (WAIT WAIT)]
Becky: I didn't know you were waitin'. *she was alone*
[What was your father's name?]
Becky: I didn't know I left you waitin'...... *she lost hope*
[(KISS ME)]
[Why does this map feel just like human skin? (HOLD ME)]
Kian: *reassuring* Hey I mean.. We're here now.
[oooh...]
[KISS ME]
Charlie: She's (already dead) crying man.
Becky: *laughs full of mourning*
[HELP ME (kiss me), beside the boiling tendrils.]
Becky: I.. Even though we both have to go.. 《WHEREVER WE'RE GOING AFTER THIS》..
[HELP ME (kiss me), why do the trees have veins??]
Becky: ..I think we should make this last.
[Are there bugs on me!?? (WAIT WAIT!!!)]
Becky: I think I'm in a memory I want to be making.
[I FEEL THE OOZING CREEPING THROBBING EGGS ALL SHIFTING INSIDE ME..]
Becky: ..you know that feeling?
Kian: Yeah, uh..
[So help me.]
Kian: If you wanna run away..
[..(wait wait)....]
Kian: There's still time.
[Help me.]
Kian: ..right? (..right?)
[..(w a i tt w a ii t.).....]
[*unsettling interlude*]
BecKY(¿): It's It's It's not all that I mean I'm sure y ou ou ou .. I'm sure you kno o *breathes out eerily* w w ..
[*music builds*]
Kian: Uh.. *he doesn't want to believe it*
[*bitb track is introduced, adding to the buildup*]
what remains of rebecca jones: Y-You know I.I... I I I shot my shot!! (she tried her best) *breathes out with a smile*
[*music halts on some disquietening notes*]
[*LOUD DISTORTED NOISE*]
[K I S S M E]
[...]
[Kiss me (kiss me), I'm feeling so much better!!]
Charlie: So she's writing this song with you and her behaviour is becoming increasingly st- r a a n g e as she's like [Kiss ] flitting through the [m] n n [m] n [me] otes [Kiss me] repeatedly and repeatedly [AND I CAN MAKE YOU STRONG] and then like l-l--looking back to you like [..hide hide...! (hide hide!!!)] *jumbled* noth wrong things were then like scribling sense non on the page.
[I'LL FIND YOU SOON ENOUGH]
she made an honest mistake: This song's al(it hasn't) been inside me and [ ^.^ Your bones will harden and your skin will slough!! \(^.^)/ ] it just wants to (KIAN) GET OUT- OUT- OUT!! *she's pleading*
Kian: Like metaphorically oo o r..?
[OOOooOoOOOO~!!]
[KISS ME. YOU CAN'T ESCAPE FOREVER]
Charlie: You start to notice as you guys are kind of singing it together like testing out the..
[KISS ME. I KNOW YOU'LL LIKE THE CHANGE.]
Charlie: The lyrics and stuff and you flit back your eyes to the page she's writing on.
[THE EGGS WILL FILL YOUR VEINS. LET ME EXPLAIN A SECOND'S PAIN GIVES WAY TO PLEASURES ONLY DREAMED OF.]
Charlie: ..and it feels like the words, the letters are almost 《C CR R A W L ING》 and you blink for a second and she is [SO KISS MEEE] NOT [EE] human. [EE] SH[E] IS SOM[E]THING ELS[E].. [EEE]
[Kiss me...]
Charlie: And you blink again and once again it's you and.. Her.
[Kiss me...]
Charlie: At the base of this tree. And you blink and it's gone-
[kIsS m.e..]
Charlie: -and you just see her nice, very cute legible handwriting again.
[k..s.....e......]
[*music fades out*]
[*the music takes on a hopeful note*]
Becky: *stops his hand* Kian that's uh.. That's really good.... I'm sorry, I'm sorry.... *she leans her head against him* I'm sorry, I didn't know.. (it would turn out this way)
Forgive her: I j-just.. (wanted to be with you one last time)
[Kill me... I won't stay down much longer...]
[Kill me... I'll only wake up stronger...]
[Kill me...]
She's sorry: You know the only thing not so shitty..
[I've opened up the path..]
I'm sorry: About this 《SHITTY TOWN》..
[You'll wake up from this scary dream and laugh..]
Was you: ..is you.
[*song cuts out*]
*END.*
#jrwi spoilers#jrwi bitb spoilers#📚 my posts#🖍️ art#just roll with it#jrwi blood in the bayou#kian stone#becky jones
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xikers interview ★
idol!xikers 1.1k words
notes! very different formatting than my usual hcs.. credits to @andteamsluv because i would never thought to write something as if you're watching it, nice idea!
▸ 𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘺?
action!
“hello youtube!” a girl says, turning her direction to face the cameras pointed at her. “my name is user chiiyuuvv and today I will be interviewing these lovely ten boys: xikers!!” the camera pans to the boys sitting in a curve, each waving to the camera with a smile. “I'm sure our users are very familiar with kq’s youngest boy group, so let's head straight to the questions, shall we?”
question : describe y/n in one word
the boys ooh and ahh at the question, some looking at the other members with a puzzled look on their face, others deep in thought as to what to say. the host starts talking again.
“i’m sure their fanbase, roady’s, are very familiar with y/n, xikers manager. i am very curious to hear what you say,” the interviewer stops to chuckle. “we will go from oldest to youngest, and please, explain why you chose said word.” the host smiles, before the camera shifts to minjae, xikers oldest member and leader.
“what are hard question..” he chuckles, looking up at the white ceiling as he ponders about his answer choice. “i’d say she’s very.. reliable.”
“oh?” the host hums, tilting her head, “why do you choose that word?”
“well, she’s always there for me, even on my darkest days,” he stops when the members start awwing, making small hearts at minjae. he blushes, “shut up! anyways, she helps me unwind and is basically the second mother to these overgrown kids. she cares, even when she does have to.”
the room breaks into a series of claps when minjae finishes, the camera traveling across the members to land on junmin.
“hii,” he waves to the camera before starting. “y/n is very worrisome and i don’t understand why. she always asks if i showered, ate, practiced, etc. she says it’s because i’m bad at taking care of my health but that’s obviously not true, i feel completely fine!!” ironically, junmin starts coughing violently. he stops when one of the members fetches him a water bottle in which he chugs. he clears his throat, waving at the camera, “like i said, fine.”
user chiiyuuvv and the rest of the members look at each other to see if they witnessed the same thing. she clears her throat, “anyways, sumin! your turn!”
right on que, sumin turns dramatically to the camera before jumping up and running towards it, shaking the lens. “she’s a freak!!” he yells, the camera getting a close up of the inside of his mouth.
“how so?”
“she keeps making these random, high pitched noises. either that, or she randomly bites me!”
“yeah, i think you’re describing yourself, min,” junmin chimes, the room erupting in laughter. sumin shakes his head like a mad man.
“and no one believes me either!!”
the host shakes off her giggle, pointing her finger at jinsik, gesturing that it’s his turn.
“oh, y/n’s supportive! she’s like my number one cheerleader!” jinsik says, looking ecstatic in front of the camera. “she even sent me a good luck message for today’s interview! love you y/n!!” he shapes his hands into two thumbs up, before forming it into a heart.
“we love supportive besties,” the host adds, jinsik nodding profoundly at her. “hyunwoo! your turn!”
“she’s weird,” hyunwoo deadpans, shrugging at the camera. “yeah, that’s all i have to say.”
“can you elaborate??” the host cranes her neck.
“i.. i really don’t know why i find her weird, if i'm being honest. maybe it’s because we get along strangely well. i dunno,” hyunwoo shrugs again, before pointing at junghoon. when junghoon gets the nod from the host, he begins.
“well unlike hyunwoo,” he answers snarky, side-eyeing the boy, “i find her very comforting. she’s always been super nice towards me and the other members, and she’s also very observant. she got yujun the bracelet he’s been eyeing for a week and a half,” on que, yujun shakes his wrist, showcasing the jewelry.
“oh, it’s so pretty!!” user chiiyuuvv gasps, before turning to seeun. the camera follows her direction. “your turn!”
“my turn, eh?” seeun looks around with a smirk. no one says anything though, just stares blankly at the boy, waiting for him to continue. “no takers?? huh.. tough crowd. anyways, dudee she’s so annoying!”
the boys jaws drop as the host looks at him confused, “how so?”
“she keeps stealing my food!” the members take turns sucking their teeths, some unballing their fist like they were going to gang up on the boy for his words. “it’s okay though, since i have a way of getting back at her!” seeun shushes like what he’s going to say is top secret. “i just call her cute! she steals a chip, i say “what are you doing, cutie?”, and her cheeks puff up everytime, works like a charm! but seriously, she’s so cutee!!” seeun gushes like a school girl, covering his face with his hands as he kicks his feet.
the host chuckles before nodding to yujun.
“y/n’s mean,” yujun huffs, crossing his arms. he continues before the host gestures to him to resume. “she keeps snitching on me to junmin! i keep getting in trouble because of her,” the boy pouts, junmin sighing.
“he thought he could get away with oversleeping when we had a full schedule today,” junmin informs to the group.
“i would have! if y/n didn’t say anything,” yujun rolls his eyes. of course he doesn’t actually mean it, because after all, you did gift him a brand new bracelet.
the host chuckles at the boys behavior before pointing to hunter, “your turn!”
“y/n is tiny,” hunter says with an adoring grin. “it’s so hard taking her seriously when she’s nagging me about something. i mean, she’s half my size, the only thing i can think about is–”
“how cute she is??” seeun finishes his sentence, his eyes lighting up like he just hit the jackpot. hunter nods, before standing up and dapping up his best buddy.
the host chuckles again, “okay, very last member, yechan!!”
“y/n is my best friend,” yechan starts confidently, shrugging with a grin as he leans against his chair in a cool manner. “she was one of the very first people i met and like junghoon said, has been so kind. what makes me special, though, is that we share the same humor, therefore have plenty of inside jokes,” yechan nods, the members playfully rolling his eyes at him.
“that sounds lovely, yechan,” user chiiyuuvv claps, before dusting off her legs, “well folks, looks like that's all the time we have today! i hope you enjoyed this very silly interview with 10 amazing boys! be sure to stream their latest comeback, give this video a thumbs up, and hit that follow button for more interviews with more kpop groups. before we end the video, xikers, anything you want to say?”
the host looks over to the boys standing up, eagerly facing the camera. “we love you, y/n!!” they shout in unison, before the cameras turn off.
cut!
︴bonus! it's been so long since i've written about xikers
▸ taglist 📬 @lil-elle , @hyunukitty , @cake1box , @nenede , @yuniniverse , @hunchan444 , @s00buwu , @cherrycolaberry , @yoiiwonn , @kookieswithjung , @wonootnoot , @pinievsev , @lis4lipsi , @everythingboutkpop
🎬 navi
@chiiyuuvv on tumblr . do not steal works/headers/line dividers
#xikers#xikers fluff#xikers drabbles#xikers imagines#xikers fanfic#xikers fanfiction#xikers x reader#xikers scenarios#xikers soft thoughts#xikers soft hours#xikers headcanons#xikers reactions
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LOST IN TRANSLATION (oneshot)
(SID JENKINS X M! READER)
⋆★ word count : 778
⋆★ warnings : angst and internalised homophobia
⋆★ summary : during their trip to russia, sid and m/n are stuck sharing a room. m/n starts a late night conversation and it takes an unexpected turn when m/n reveals a little more than he intended.
⋆★ extra : me when .. me when I actually write instead of leaving my tumblr dry ‼️ (also we all know I suck at dialogue I apologise)
Sid couldn’t sleep. The old-fashioned heater in their Moscow hotel room was doing its best, but the chill in the air still seeped through the cracks. He shifted under the heavy blankets, trying to find a comfortable position on the lumpy mattress.
In the bed next to his, M/N was also awake. Sid could hear the occasional rustle of sheets and the soft sound of M/N’s breathing. It was a strange kind of comfort, knowing someone else was awake too, even if they hadn’t spoken much since turning out the lights.
Sid had never been great at sharing rooms with people. Not because he didn’t like people—he did, really—but because it felt like he could never fully relax. There was always this pressure to act normal, to not let anyone see just how awkward he really was.
“Hey, Sid?” M/N’s voice broke the silence, quiet and hesitant.
“Yeah?” Sid replied, his voice a little rough from the cold air.
“You ever think about… you know, stuff?” M/N’s question was vague, almost like he was testing the waters.
“Stuff?” Sid echoed, turning his head on the pillow to look over at M/N’s silhouette in the dark. “What kind of stuff?”
“Like, I dunno… feelings? About people?” M/N’s voice was softer now, as if he was trying not to disturb the night.
Sid’s stomach tightened. He’d had conversations like this before, but they always made him uneasy. The ones where you had to be honest, where you had to say things out loud that were easier to keep buried. He wasn’t sure he was ready for that, especially not here, in this unfamiliar room, miles away from home.
“Why?” Sid asked, trying to keep his voice casual, even though his heart was starting to beat a little faster.
M/N hesitated, the silence stretching between them. Sid could feel the tension growing, thickening the air around them.
“I… I think I have a bit of a crush on you, Sid,” M/N finally admitted, his voice barely more than a whisper. “And I know you probably don’t feel the same way, but I just… I thought you should know.”
Sid’s breath caught in his throat. His mind started racing, panic creeping in as he tried to process what M/N had just said. A crush? On him? He’d never even considered that possibility. Sure, M/N was a good friend, one of the few people Sid actually felt comfortable around, but this? This was different. This was something he didn’t know how to deal with.
“M/N, I…” Sid started, but his voice trailed off. He didn’t know what to say, how to react. All he could feel was this sudden, overwhelming need to push M/N away, to make it stop.
“Look, I know it’s weird,” M/N said quickly, misinterpreting Sid’s silence. “You don’t have to say anything, really. I just wanted to be honest with you. We can forget I said anything, okay?”
But Sid couldn’t forget it. The words were already there, lodged in his mind, and now he couldn’t unhear them. Something twisted inside him, something ugly and uncomfortable. He knew what it was—had felt it before, in fleeting moments when he’d caught himself looking too long at another guy, or when someone had jokingly accused him of being gay. It was fear, but also anger, at himself mostly, for even letting the thought cross his mind.
“What, you think just because we’re sharing a room, I’d be into that?” Sid snapped before he could stop himself. His voice was harsher than he intended, the words coming out all wrong, but the panic inside him was too strong to control.
M/N went silent, and Sid immediately regretted it. He could see M/N’s outline on the bed, motionless, and he knew he’d hurt him. But the fear was still there, gnawing at him, refusing to let him apologize.
“Sid, I didn’t mean…” M/N started, but Sid cut him off.
“No, just… don’t,” Sid said, his voice shaking. “I’m not—this isn’t me, okay? I’m not like that.”
The room fell into an oppressive silence, the kind that made Sid’s skin crawl. He could feel his heart pounding in his chest, his pulse loud in his ears. He knew he was being unfair, that M/N didn’t deserve this, but he couldn’t help it. He’d spent so long trying to convince himself he was normal, that there was nothing wrong with him, and now this was threatening to unravel everything.
“I’m sorry,” M/N whispered, barely audible. “I shouldn’t have said anything.”
Sid clenched his fists under the covers, the guilt crashing over him in waves. He wanted to say something, to fix it, but the words never came out.
#writers on tumblr#male reader#x male reader#m! reader#sid jenkins x m! reader#sid jenkins skins#no beta we die like .. well sid
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Day nine: carving a pumpkin. inspired by my own carving pumpkins shenaigans. Bilingual Nat at your rescue!
Natalie grunts as she pushes the pumpkin on the table, "Damn this is heavy". The bright orange peel stares at her, almost begging to be carved out.
You are sitting on your kitchen table,tools at hand and pumpkins sitting in front of you. "You were the one that decided to buy a pumpkin larger than her orn head!" she scoffs and shrugs, moving to sit on a chair.
That overgrown vegetable is so big that Nat's face has quite literally eclipsed behind it; you can only see a blonde hair poking from behind the pumpkin.
"So, which face were you thinking of carving?" you ask her, only seeing her single hair move when she peeks at you from over the pumpkin. "Hmh, I dunno. I was thinking like a..." she examines it's shape: it's round as the moon and it's stalk looks like a single hair. It looks silly. "I want to make something funny, maybe".
You are playing classic halloween songs while hot choco is cooling down near the window. Her fingers are holding the marker as she draws a smiling face on the pumpkin. One eye winks, while the other remains open; the mouth of the pumpkin is toothless and smiling.
The first thing to do is to remove the pulp. After having cut, with difficulty, an opening on the head of the pumpkin, she begins to scoop it with up a spoon.
"Dio! Perchè c'è n'è così tanta?!" next to her a pile of stringy, smelly pulp is forming, seeds and it's colour spreading everywhere. "Ah, fanculo" her hands sink into the carcass of the pumpkin and she begins to rip off the remains of the pulp with her bare hands. It’s strangely creepy. "Um, Natalie… with a little patience it would all came away…" she makes a grimace and continues her work. While she moves the flesh, she sees herself in a dark and cold place, as she gutted someone dear to her. A shiver runs up her back and for a second she stops, and she has to tell herself that she’s here now, not there. As the last strand is pulled out, she grunts and looks at her job: the pumpkin is compleatley clean, not one bit of flesh in it, "Fatto" she grins to herself while she rubs her hands togheter, effectivley spreading the colour on her skin. "...please go wash your hands before you make a mess of your clothes".
Now's the time to cut. She takes the carving tools and beguns to-. "Natalie! Natalie no!" while you were taking the hot choco, you see Natalie stabbing the poor pumpkin, in an attempt to go deep enough to carve it. "You are supposed to go in gently! Otherwise you're gonna hurt yourself!" Hm, that makes sense.
She starts to carve again, being careful not to get hurt and respecting the edges of the design. Sometimes she makes a mistake and the knife sinks a little further than what she had planned, but still, she does the job. Now, a smiling winky face stares at her. "E tu hai- uhm, have you finished yet?" she stumbles over her words for a moment, before looking at how far you are in your progress. "Almost done!" yours is more disturbing than hers, a malicious smile for a mouth and eyes too kind to be honest. When you take the pumpkin, much smaller than the behemot she choose and put it next to your face, smiling, Natalie feels a little sense of adoration towards you.
"Now, it’s time to light them!" you get a small tealight for your pumpkin and a bigger candle for Nat. When you light them and put them in, you cover both with the piece you had cut put earlier, and watch as their lights illuminate the room.
Natalie puts her chin on your shoulder and hugs your lower stomach, placing a kiss on your neck. "Ti adoro, lo sai?" you turn to kiss her on the cheek, "I know".
#yellowjackets x reader#yellowjackets x you#natalie scatorccio x reader#bilingual natalie!#autumn writing prompts#halloween writing prompts#fictober#natalie scartoccio x you
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“hey, ‘sup?”
grian whirled around, an iron sword flashing into his hand. “who— oh. hey, pearl. doing fine.”
“hi,” the cleaning lady greeted cheerfully, her wings fluttering as she skipped the last few steps of the jagged bridge leading up to grian’s base.
“no flying,” grian smiled.
pearl shrugged. “well, it’s break time. the rules don’t really apply right now.”
”yeah, whatever. what’d you come here for?” grian pulled out an axe and started hacking at the wood of the trees he’d been growing nearby.
she hummed a wistful tune and strolled underneath grian’s structure. “nice place you got here. very interesting.”
“it’s an abstract staircase.”
“it’s a staircase, you’re a nutcase, whatever.” pearl turned around to face grian. “grian, i’m not going to beat around the bush here. this life series feels different.”
“what d’you mean?” grian stopped mid-swing, and his grip tightened on the axe.
“i dunno,” the mounder flopped down on the grass, absentmindedly twirling her sword. evidently, she didn’t think it threatening. or maybe she did. ah, psychological warfare. “it feels more… grounded? like, real. with limited, double life… the gimmick felt so out of reach. a timer ticking down your life? your life being linked to someone else? it felt like something that came down from the heavens.”
pearl paused. grian let the axe drop onto the grass and leaned against the nearest tree, folding his arms. “well?”
“but now… it’s so close. it’s so subjective. we don’t even know if we’ve completed our task yet.” here, pearl grinned. “part of why i failed my second task, heh. but i didn’t figure human interactions were really their kind of thing. usually they throw us the idea and we just go along with it.”
“who’s they?” grian asked, the answer already drumming in his head.
“you know. the watchers.” pearl glanced at grian with a strange spark in her eye. “with a literal sculpture of, well, them giving out the secrets? feels more your kind of thing, if i’m going to be honest.”
“so?” grian said defiantly, already seeing the wave of truth about to crash onto his shore.
pearl sighed. “grian, the life game this time — martyn calls it a death game, haha — it’s not the watchers. it’s you.”
grian swallowed, feeling the sun burning his brown hair. he reached up and ruffled it. “i-i may still be a watcher, but i’m…” he hesitated. “one of the good ones.”
“yeah,” pearl rolled her eyes, “they always said that. ‘we’re here to help’. and here to punish if it’s more entertaining,” she added with disdain. “that’s them, eh? don’t really care if we’re happy or sad, as long as it’s fun to watch.”
grian looked up at the sky, and then at the ground, and groaned. “look, i… i thought it would be fun, alright? just a little— a little game. would be fun to watc- play.” he spit out a curse word in the ancient watcher dialect.
“unfortunately, i understand that,” pearl sighed. “is that why? you were so wound up when scar won the hard task. he’d beaten the system— you. you were the system. and watchers hate losing control.”
“i shouldn’t have gone soft on him. humans are so—”
“grian, careful. you’re turning bad again.”
grian stopped himself. “right, right. right. i’m human, scar’s human. you’re human.”
“grian, why?” pearl looked at him sadly. “why did you want to— put us through this two months of torture again?”
the watcher looked at her, pained. “pearl, i… i promised myself, this life series would be better than the watchers’. it would be fun, and goofy. there was even a slumber party, right? most people at your house since double life, i bet.” grian had to admit, double life was a low blow, and he felt bad immediately, but he was defensive and that was pearl’s greatest chink in her armour.
pearl flinched. “what, and forcing people together is any better? creating fake friendships for the sake of a game? having whispers spread and secrets kept between friends who can’t tell or risk eventual death sounds a more watcher than grian thing, if i’d be honest. i’d rather have true pain than false happiness.”
“this series is different from the other ones. i’m not like the watchers at all.” grian protested.
pearl stood up and kept her sword, her wings wavering from anxiety. “it’s different? when compliments aren’t real and people aren’t themselves? that’s good? mumbo built his house sideways because of bdubs’ task. sure, it’s harmless and funny now, but when the ink the secrets are written in turn to blood…” she shook her head. “it’s not going to benefit anyone.”
“i’m a good person,” grian repeated, trying to calm the thumping in his ribcage.
“are you sure? are you really sure, that when this server, this town is painted red, you wouldn’t watch and bask in the glory of the death and blood? you keep insisting it’s different, but it’s exactly the same as every other time.”
because power is what you crave. there’s watcher in your soul, grian. there’s always been and there still is.
grian wasn’t sure where the words came from. he wanted to blame it on the watchers, but somehow he knew it was coming from himself, his mind pleading with his heart.
“pearl, i—” grian’s wrist beeped. “session’s starting. look, pearl, i’m not sorry, it was a good decision—”
pearl shook her head. “i’m not mad, i’m just… well. gotta get back to do my intro.” she walked two or three steps down the bridge, then stopped and turned back. “got a secret to keep?”
and grian’s heart felt the wind whip across it, harshly lashing it as he watched her leave.
always watching.
#watcher grian#watchers#grian#trafficblr#traffic smp#secret life#secret life smp#life series#traffic series#pearlescentmoon#traffic life#grian fanfic#secret life fanfic
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i dunno if i missed but have you ever written anything exploring how was stepdadrry and yn's first encounter? like her mom bringing him home and yn being 😶🤯🥸 and harry being 😌🤫😈😈! it would be fun to read
A/n: Thanks for the idea anon and sorry this took me so long to get to! chipping away at these requests slowly! Hope you enjoy! 2k words
Warning: Stepdad!harry being inappropriate, inappropriate thoughts, light smut, guilt
Stepdad!Harry Masterlist
The first time you met Harry your mom had been dating him for a few months already. You had very little information about him. You didn't care too much really. Not that you didn't care about who your mom dated, but most of the guys you never met.
But you definitely got to meet Harry.
When he rang the doorbell, your mom was in the kitchen finishing up dinner. She'd made lasagna and her special tiramisu dessert which was your favorite. You kind of wondered if she was trying to butter you up or something. Or perhaps this Harry guy just liked the same things you did.
"Will you grab that, hon? Thanks!" Your mom shouted from the kitchen.
You pulled the front door open and what you saw was not what you expected. There was no way this was Harry.
"Hi. I'm, Harry," he stuck his hand out to you to shake.
So this was Harry.
You reached your hand out and smiled, "I'm, Y/n."
You just stood there with your hand in his for a moment. Looking at the incredibly attractive and young man your mom was dating. He was dressed casually and his hair was dark with thick curls. He had light eyes and a handsome face...
You gulped and suddenly your mom was behind you, her hands on your shoulders, "This is Harry!"
She squeezed at you and then moved herself to grab Harry and pulled him in for a hug, "Thank you for coming."
You stood with your mouth dropped open like an idiot. Still trying to wrap your mind around this moment. Your mom was gorgeous, but she was quite a bit older than Harry. Harry couldn't have been more than five years your senior. But that meant he was a good decade or more younger than your mom.
Setting the table, you listened to your mom and Harry flirt and laugh in the living room. You were feeling strange about the whole thing, especially with how attractive Harry was. It made you feel differently about your mom even, but you couldn't quite place your finger on what it made you feel. Was it jealousy? Were you impressed by it? Were you grossed out? Maybe all of the above?
Harry was polite and he was good at holding a conversation. He kept looking at you and smiling, quirking one side of his mouth up and it made you feel warm. His smile was nice.
"So, where did you two meet again?" You raised your brow and looked from your mom to Harry.
Your mom sat her fork down and put her hand down under the table, probably on Harry's lap as she looked at him, "At a bar. Harry was playing a gig with his band and afterward, I went up to him to chat and tell him how good I thought he was, and well, the rest is history."
Harry smiled at you as your mom spoke about they met. There was something in the way his eyes traveled over your face that confused you a little. Made you feel light headed.
"So you're in a band?" You questioned and stuffed a forkful of food into your mouth.
"Yeah. Just a little fun thing. We do shows here and there. Not really that good to be honest," he laughed and looked over at your mom.
"He's being humble. His band is good," your mom smiled at Harry and they leaned in to kiss. You turned away.
The three of you cleaned up the kitchen together. It was actually nice to have an extra set of hands to help clean up. It made things go a lot faster.
Plus, you kind of liked the eye candy. Even though he was not yours to look at, you couldn't help it. You felt especially bold as well because he was noticing you too. He didn't do anything inappropriate but you were aware of the look. When your gazes would meet, Harry would grin and keep his eyes on yours for a beat too long.
And somehow, deep down, it pleased you. You were the younger, hotter version of the woman he was dating. You looked nearly identical to your mom so it wouldn't surprise you that Harry might find you attractive.
Harry and your mom settled onto the couch with some movie playing and you called your friend and went to the backyard. You needed some air. Harry's eyes on you were intense and that smile... you needed to clear your mind.
Your conversation with Cassidy did help you get your mind off what was going on inside your house.
But you couldn't help it when you finally brought him up, "My mom's boyfriend is closer to my age than hers."
Cassidy was invested in hearing all about the hot mystery man. You began to joke around and kept turning to make sure no one was coming to join you in the backyard. You didn't want your mom or Harry to hear what you were saying about him.
"God, I know, Cas. Maybe I'll try to sneak a picture and send it to you so you can understand my turmoil."
You both laughed.
"Plus, I can tell he's like... packing. The front of his jeans have this like, bulge and I kept looking at it while we were cleaning up. I couldn't stop it and I know he saw me! Ugh... I hate this too. Because that means he and my mom... I don't want to finish that sentence!"
You could hear Cassidy laughing through the receiver but then you jumped when you felt a hand on your shoulder and a deep voice in your ear, "You don't want to finish saying what?"
You turned and saw Harry standing behind you. You squeezed your eyes closed and cringed, "Uh, I gotta go, Cas."
You disconnected the call and Harry let go of your shoulder. You couldn't make eye contact with him. You were too embarrassed.
Harry walked toward the pool and looked around the yard casually and then turned back toward you, his hands on his hips, "Tell me, Y/n. What is it that you think I'm packing? Hmmm?" A smirk on his face.
He walked closer to you and lowered his voice, "Tell me."
You huffed out a breath and looked down at your feet and shook your head, "No! You weren't supposed to hear me."
Harry laughed and his knuckles brushed over your wrist as he walked to your other side, like a predator circling his prey, "I did catch you looking. You're right about that. That was very naughty of you."
You looked up at his face and frowned. You were totally busted.
"Don't look so sad. It's only natural when two adults recognize there's an attraction," he was still wearing that damn cocky smirk. You swallowed and looked toward the house.
"Your mom is getting the dessert ready. Should probably go back in now, don't you think? Or did you need more time to ogle my package?" He snickered as he walked back into the house.
The fucker.
Dessert was awkward. You only wanted to go to your room and forget the day ever happened. Harry was definitely on to you but he'd also sort of admitted to finding you attractive in return. It was confusing and exciting. But wrong. So wrong.
The moment you finished your plate, you excused yourself.
You kept yourself locked away in your room. You could hear your mom and Harry laughing and talking but you couldn't hear exactly what they were saying. You felt like you couldn't relax or settle as long as he was in the house. Your heart was pounding and his deep voice with that damn British accent was sending chills down your spine even though he was in the living room and you were in your bedroom.
Eventually, things got quiet. You finally decided to leave your bedroom so you could wash your face and brush your teeth. But that's when you heard it.
Your mom's bedroom door was closed but there was a light coming from under the crack at the bottom. Harry was in there with her. You could hear his voice, but they weren't having a conversation. The rhythmic sound of the bed moving was unmistakable.
You ran back into your room and slammed the door closed, your chest heaving. You did not want to hear that and you did not want to think of Harry and your mom... nope...
You turned on your radio and increased the volume so you wouldn't hear anything else.
Once again, you weren't sure how you should feel about it all. You hated yourself for finding him so attractive and you were a bit curious as to what he was like intimately. But your mom was the one who was getting to have that, not you.
And the worst part was that you were slightly turned on. Not to the image of your mother, no you shoved that thought far down and away from any corner of your mind, but just the idea that Harry was in the room down the hall with his broad shoulders and muscled arms, that deep voice, and what is probably a big dick getting off. You were in serious trouble with your thoughts.
You climbed under your covers and heard a thud and then another. You decided to pretend it was you under Harry. That his attention was on you, his hands, his mouth...
It was the dirtiest you'd ever felt. Embarrassing. Shameful. A secret you'd take with you to your grave as you rubbed yourself to the image of your mom's boyfriend doing to you whatever it was he was doing to her.
Those dark curls getting sweaty as he fucked himself into you, those big palms on your tits, on your neck... Maybe he'd spank you. His eyes were on yours as he penetrated your virgin body for the first time. He'd feel how tight and wet you could get for him.
He'd groan and bite his lip to keep quiet so your mom couldn't hear.
You gasped when you imagined how deep he'd get and much he'd stretch you out. His lips on yours. His hands in your hair. Your fingers in his. Your body being rocked up and down with each of his deep thrusts...
Your orgasm was shameful. It felt delicious but so bitter. You swallowed your moan and felt disgusting.
And now you were a mess and needed to go to the bathroom to clean yourself. Despite not wanting to hear anything. But there was no choice.
You rushed to the bathroom and cleaned yourself up, washed your face, and brushed your teeth. You suspected they were done doing whatever because it was quiet again.
When you opened the bathroom door Harry was leaning against the wall outside of the bathroom. That damn smirk on his face. You gasped and paused as he stepped in toward you.
"This is cute," he pulled at the hem of your t-shirt and you couldn't respond as you kept your eyes on his.
"So is this," he brought a hand up to your bottom lip and pinched it between his fingers, "pink and puffy... was all I could think of just now. Call me perverted but this is what I got off to. Just imagining these lips... Mmmm..." Harry tucked his lips into his mouth and let go of your lip before walking past you and closing the door to the bathroom behind him.
You stood like a statue in the hallway. Unmoving, unbreathing, unblinking. Had that really just happened? Did he just say he thought of your mouth while he...?
You shook your head and just before you could step past the threshold of your door your mom popped her head out of her room, "Hey... uh... Harry's gonna stay the night. Is that okay with you?"
You were still too stunned to use actual words so you just shrugged your shoulders and nodded before closing your door behind you. Safe in your room away from your mom's eyes. From her scrutiny. Could she see how flustered you were? How fucked you were?
Feedback/Thoughts | Support Me! | Main Masterlist
Thank you for reading! I appreciate any support so remember to comment, reblog, & like 💕
Tags: @michellekstyles @ssaama @sombrioinvernoemveneza @golden-hoax @a-strange-familiar @reveriehs @yousunshineyoutempter @the-gardener-31 @tenaciousperfectionunknown @swiftmendeshoran @luvonstyles @dancinsunflowerkiwi @tiaamberxx @lukesaprince @harrys-foxy @dirtytissuebox @closureesny @lhharrylilpumpkin @evelynlarue @chaptersleftunwritten @justlemmeadoreyou @harrysmimi @itsgigikay @angelbabyyy99 @lllukulele @lanadelharry @novasblogofstuff @gills-lounge @ky-harlow-bieber @angel-akxo @flowerfeastrry @anothermannharry
#harry styles#harry styles smut#stepdad!harry#stepdadrry#step father!harry#harry styles one shot#harry styles fic#harry styles fanfic#firstpost
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Hi Nell0! How are you? Well I’m pretty good as of late and part of it is that I can walk perfectly fine again. I didn’t even have to do physical therapy for it. But still that whole thing was agonizing and I don’t recommend it at all. Come to think of about it it’s been a while since I did a question here since I been so busy. Hmm this isn’t a question if I don’t ask one so I’m going to ask it. My brain keeps coming up with a scenario where Ingo had his own Light Dragon AKA Dragon! Zelda arc where yeah it sounds exactly how it sounds. He turns into a immortal(ish?) Pokémon to let say go home but he ALMOST lost his humanity completely like what happened with BOTW/TOTK Zelda but nope they both turned back human after all so happy ending. But what would you Legendify him into? Other than Zekrom, I keep seeing him turn into a Shiny Giratina because ghost type and the silverness of the helmet thingy can be read as his gray hair, Suicine and possibly a Hisuian one too at that because he can basically run on any body of water and basically kind of becomes a Cryptid in Unova and finally Lunala but a black and silver one because I seen a theory he got to Hisui because of the Ultra Wormholes plus Lunala can open up one anytime it pleases. Ok this was fun to ask because I don’t have anybody to talk about this to! Ok have a good day/night and I catch up with you later! Thx! ❤️
It's been some time, anon! Glad to hear that and that you didn't have to go to rehabilitation, since it can be kinda painful sometimes depending on the injury. Still would be a good idea to try and get a bit more strength in the muscles to avoid a repeat or pain in the long run, but happy to hear all's good.
The thought of Ingo becoming a dragon that would last until his original time wasn't one I thought about until now, but the potential??? To be honest, there's a lot of legendaries or mythicals that could fit. I'm not sure which one I would choose because my guilty au preference is the twin dragons au, but that wouldn't really work here. I mean, it would, but there's the chance to make up something unique and it would be such a waste to let it go by. I really associate Irida with Hoopa because of the Pearl Clan, so a mythical or a legendary of the sixth generation could work as well.
Having said all that, my favorite still has gotta be Kyurem Ingo. It just fits, dunno how to explain it but it does. I saw the Ultra wormholes theory around a lot some time ago and it could be, but I'm still not sold on the idea. Could be a situation of the same thing being called different things on two very different points of time, but pokemon world is strange enough for the rifts to be their own thing. Or be Giratina related, mostly because of what happened in one of the pkmn movies (the one with Shaymin).
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I’m walking into the fire
4 of the 7 should have died, because the sacred number is 3. Screw the “this is a lucky chance” thing, that’s weird. And this is when I walk into the fire.
I think Piper should have died, Leo should have stayed dead, and Annabeth and Percy should have died.
and I know I know y’all are brandishing your knives, and especially the Leo fans, but I have proof, or some ish, I guess. Don’t kill me yet.
Piper is a pretty obvious choice. She’s have less than a week of training before jumping into the quest. and her character is really Mary-Sue coded, with suddenly being able to dual wield (it’s not easy. I fancy weapons and it’s HARD not to cut yourself while dual wielding) and charm speak GAEA to sleep, so if this was real she would have died in the first book.
Leo is just… well y’see, I don’t have much proof on this one, and he’s actually pretty powerful, but the whole “Asceplius’s potion” was really strange, out of pocket, and random as hell. I’m going to be honest, it really seemed like Rick wanted to kill him but realized the fandom loved him too much and said “well. Guess I’ll do something that revives him.”
Annabeth and Percy kinda go hand in hand. Percabeth shippers, just hear me out before you try to find my address. Annabeth’s fatal flaw is pride. But I’m HoO it was completely erased, so I’m bringing it back up. I’m being real here, a monster probably would have went “beg for your life and I’ll set you free” or something, and Annabeth, holding on to her pride, says “no” and gets killed. (Actually it’d probably be something harder like a god. Annabeth is skilled as hell in the art of battle.)
Percy is very, very powerful, but so was Achilles and he died via arrow. So here’s my take. Knowing Annabeth’s death, Percy pulls an Achilles and basically decimated the monsters, other army, and whatnot. He’s absolutely feral, and in his rage driven haste, he is killed by a monster or a fly arrow, leading to his death. He and Annabeth start their story and end their story together. Kinda poetic? I dunno.
but yeah that’s about it. If I’m dying I’m sorry, but I just wanna get this out here.
#pjo#hoo#percy jackson#annabeth chase#percy and annabeth#piper mclean#leo valdez#im dying soon aren’t I
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Reading Viv's callout post for DollCreep is kinda frustrating tbh. I wasn't there and none of us know exactly what the dynamic was like but that's why evidence is provided in these callout posts. To convince us that DollCreep is really bad. but.. the evidence provided isn't really on her side?
DC doesn't seem nice, exactly, but I'm not really feeling a lot of malicious intent? Not in the messages where they have normal-ish conversations and when their friendship still kinda existed? I'm not feeling much actual intent on abuse? I've been through some pretty nasty abusive relationships and I can understand being sensitive sometimes and needing a little more assurance but I don't think I'm comfortable calling DC totally abusive? Not without more evidence.
DC has an obsession with copying which isn't healthy. I dunno if I agree with him that the Viv ocs are copies but that also is more of an issue on his part rather than an intent on abusing Viv. I feel like there's gotta be more to that story.
Some of the messages seems more like critique than anything. The whole "those teeth look weird in your style" posts are more critique than abuse. It's not a nice way of phrasing it but DC doesn't seem delicate in general? His language is casual-harsh from the messages. Not horribly cruel? Maybe?
DC seems kind of exhausted with Viv saying the relationship wasn't healthy. To be honest it's probably not a healthy relationship and these two should've just stopped talking a long time ago. When DC does cut Viv off it seemed like it had been a long time coming. I've had to do something similar in my own life. Just sometimes on a certain day you chose to do it. It's not always because of a big blowout it can just be exhaustion. and if panic attacks were happening on the regular then it's not a bad thing they cut each other out.
DC gave Jiji to Viv as something of a peace offering. and in that message in particular (not underlined by Viv) Doll mentions that the copying obsession and character credit issue IS a personal problem that they're trying to work through. Something that isn't acknowledged in the rest of the callout. Viv obviously knows he has an issue with this subject and I feel like she could've spared a little more grace in acknowledging this is a personal problem for him. It's wrong for him to feel that way but it's clearly not just a 'DC is an asshole' situation. It's a mental issue. A hangup. A really nasty and unhealthy mental hangup.
His Afkinz stuff about Viv saying 'It's my story' in her underlined bits.. She bought Afkinz from DC. It seems like he's offering his own thoughts based on the character concept he created. He's not demanding anything just saying what he would've done with the character concept he created? Again, not in a NICE way but still.
I understand why Viv would remove part of DC's credit in Die Young but I still think she shouldn't have. She was angry at him but it doesn't change that it was a bad decision. In the art world credit is more highly valued than it is anywhere else and 'special thanks' doesn't mean much in comparison to a design credit.
Some of the parts towards the end are a bit.. weird. I dunno why she put up the original Jiji art mixed with rp logs to.. make fun of Jiji? The character made by DC was obviously a parody of scene girls.. not a real serious character. So it seems strange to say "wow so smart and original". She wasn't a character used in a real project so..
She's calling DC a stalker for just.. visiting her blog? I don't think that's terribly unusual? and Viv rants and talks about DC about as much as he did her? So.. I think they were both being annoying about all of this.
He made a crappy drawing of Viv.. but Viv made Jojo. So.. According to the writing under the drawing this was made AFTER Viv made Jojo. So.. I don't understand why she's shocked when she did the same thing first? and the 'dislikes' part is pretty.. concerning.
I really feel uncomfortable with Viv pointing out DC's characters that do 'extremely disturbing' things. Why even put this here? It adds nothing to the allegations and serves to shame DC. Especially when Viv does the same thing in romanticizing abusive relationships. Which.. I personally don't think is always wrong in every circumstance. and I know Viv doesn't see that as wrong either considering her OWN characters. So the only reason she put it there is to shame DC.
All in all. Pretty wild? I do think DC was a bad friend and they had a very toxic relationship but.. This is also something that should've been handled privately? Callouts really only need to happen if there's a clear and present danger to the general public. Nothing DC did was a danger to anyone but him and Viv. They should've went their separate ways and never spoken about each other again.
Instead this happened. Making it public was such a horrible idea and did nothing positive at all. It COULD NOT have had a positive outcome.
I think that's my takeaway from the whole thing too. DollCreep was no saint and they seem like they were both bad for each other, but from what we've heard of DollCreep, they seem to have disappeared, grown up, and become a better person. Vivzie hasn't.
Also, Dollcreep made a crappy drawing of Viv. Viv made a transphobic caricature of Dollcreep. Viv, you don't get a checkmark on that one.
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One thing I found particularly interesting in Final Horizon is that in one conversation with Amy, the doctor seems to express sympathy for the remnants of the Ancient's consciousness that only come out at night due to their fear of The End even many years after their extinction. I dunno, it adds dimension to his character IMO that even though he's an awful person through and through, he's still capable of at least expressing some sympathy towards others.
I don't mind if this was the intention with it or if what I'm personally hearing it as was for reasons I'll explain in a moment buuut- I honestly kinda can't really hear it as being genuine sympathy. His tone and the little "hmph!" before saying it sounds slightly amused almost. I keep trying to unhear it and read it as sympathy but I can't.
Putting with sound here to see if anyone else can see what I mean with that in mind:
youtube
That's not just me saying this out of wishful thinking or anything as like I said, I don't mind if that wasn't that the intention. He absolutely has low empathy from all I've observed but that doesn't mean he couldn't ever have any at all in any situation ever hypothetically, so I wouldn't be mad if it was the intention for him to feel slight sympathy.
Though I think it'd be a liiittle ooc in this specific way as he's never given a shit about anything bad happening to anyone before, so why would this be the time and way? It'd be a strange way to suddenly throw in now this way after many opportunities before. Cute little creatures don't make him care and feel bad, otherwise he would've felt that way about those he captures and uses in robots.
But it doesn't sound like he genuinely feels really bad for them exactly to me. His tone and his "hmph!" makes it sound like he's more a little amused and says it with a lilt, that was my first impression and I can't unhear it. With subtitles alone, you can imagine a sadder tone more along the lines of what Sonic and co express when saying such things but that isn't what it sounds like from him in comparison. That's why it didn't raise any brows at all when I first heard it.
Going by tone, I'd say the delivery on the memo where he acknowledged The Ancients dying out sounded more like they could've set it up for him feeling sympathy as his tone would've been more appropriate. But instead three memos after, he's just like "Sure it wiped them out but I could handle The End because I'm just built different I'm a genius!" -
youtube
He basically brushes off the severity of the tragedy and insults their skill and intelligence with that, like they just needed to get good like him, so he clearly wasn't actually sympathetic then either.
BUT if he somehow was even just a little bit sympathetic for even a second, it would be an even more of a deliberate fully aware choice of his to still be an asshole about it like that, so that would just make him worse and would mean he has a very low amount if any at all to still be able to do that. And that would potentially make him even more dangerous and threatening if he had the emotional intelligence to feel that sympathy, yet he still chooses to be a jerk about them dying out and still choosing to be horrible person. So that's why it's good and funny either way to me lol
But it's not like he changes in tone when talking to Amy like he's just pretending not to care about them or something, if he was feeling sympathy then I don't think he'd even say that in front of her at all. And especially because in the memos he made it even obvious that he doesn't feel sympathy for The Ancients getting wiped out and still chooses to be a dick about it a few memos later- and that's when he's alone speaking to himself and could've been honest and open.
So I'm currently interpreting it as an example of his low empathy shown through a way where he's saying something that could be sympathetic coming from anyone else with the feeling and tone, but he just doesn't have it to match the words he's saying and it just seems detached. Since usually it's through him blatantly stating he doesn't care about something or brushing something off as insignificant. The latter is there a bit by how it sounds like he's bemused and detached but the words don't match like with the common former with him.
But the way it sounds a little amused and attached just almost loops back around to his cruelty because while he doesn't particularly revel in it, him sounding even slightly amused at the idea of them still being in hiding in fear... and how he talked about how he could've handled it better than the ancients... well. XD That kind of makes it seem almost the opposite of sympathetic to me. Not amusement to the point of it being another case of his sadism, but rather just an example of him being a lot more detached and a little apathetic really.
To put it simply, the vibe I'm personally getting is that it's like he's just going "ha! funny how it's like it's just happened and they still hide in fear of what wiped them out." And that alone is far from "he's actually showing sympathy towards something" to me. But as I said, even if that was the intention, it's not a bother to me and I'm willing to entertain it for how it could make him even more dangerous for that (though he absolutely is enough already if not of course). But I can't say I can hear it as being a moment of genuine heartfelt sympathy from him.
#dr eggman#dr robotnik#eggman#dr. eggman#sonic frontiers#sonic frontiers the final horizon#sonic frontiers spoilers#sonic frontiers the final horizon spoilers
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💗💓💘♥️💔 for Nightmare, Killer, Error, Horror, Dust and Cross? 👀 If it's not too much to ask for at once of course! ☺️ I just adore these bois 💝
Aw dang man, one of the emojis didn't work. I dunno what the black heart is but you can send that one again if you want.
💗 GROWING HEART - if they have a crush, is it noticable? what changes when they're in love?
Nightmare: Not really, no, and it's because he doesn't understand really? Crushes are still something new for him and he hates it. When he has a crush, he may focus on them a bit more than others and he might act a bit awkward near them.
Killer: Oh yeah haha. When he has a crush on someone, he tries to latch onto them as often as he can. Now if he's in love? He's much more protective and dislikes not knowing where they are.
Error: They feel much more awkward lol and might honestly stop talking to their crush for a while until they figure out their feelings... good luck.
Axe: YES! When he has a crush on someone he is very protective of them, cares for them, and hates it whenever there's anything that can be remotely dangerous to them. He might follow them around or just stand close to them cause of his crush.
Dusty: Sort of... they might notice him looking at them sometimes but then looking away fast. It takes a while for him to really let it slip that he likes them but he might stand a bit closer to them at times.
Cross: If they give him the chance to, he'll stick close to them and would bring them gifts sometimes. He wants to protect them at all costs pretty much and he is always nervous/embarrassed near them. So yeah, pretty noticeable lol.
💓 BEATING HEART - what gets their heart racing?
Nightmare: In a romantic way; being close to his crush makes his chest feel strange and very warm. While in a normal way; being around too much positive emotion at once makes his chest feel strange and annoying.
Killer: If you mean in a romantic way, just being close to his crush or them paying attention to him makes his soul feel all warm and giddy while in a not-romantic sense, fighting! Fighting makes his heart race and he always feels so happy. It's… a strange feeling. A happy, but empty feeling.
Error: Hmmmm honestly? If they're too close to their crush and they see that they're paying them attention. It makes Error feel freaked out, and they're not sure if that's a good or a bad way? If the other person stares at them too long though, Error might lash out lol. They have emotional issues.
Axe: In a romantic way; if his crush touches him. Mostly his hands, but really any type of touch make his soul feel warm and it's a feeling that he sometimes forgets about. They're so warm compared to him, and it makes him feel so… happy. Otherwise hunting or getting a good meal! Mostly hunting, though.
Dusty: If his crush is too close to him. It makes his heart start to beat fast and he feels nice but also pretty panicked… it's a strange feeling and he really doesn't like it. He'll just have to get used to it.
Cross: There's a lot of things that would get his heart beating. In a romantic way, cuddling makes his soul feel strange. It makes him feel all warm and fuzzy.
💘 HEART W/ ARROW - what traits do they look for in a relationship? do they believe in love at first sight?
Nightmare: He does not believe in love at first sight. Relationships need to be built up! There's lust, there's affection maybe at first sight, but not love. The traits that he would need his datemate is that they cannot be too controlling of him. They need to respect him and they need to be honest… plus, you know, he doesn't want them to be JUST like him. They need their own thoughts and ideas.
Killer: He does :) though maybe not as strongly as Axe. With Killer, the traits that he needs his datemate to have is self-confidence even if it's just a little! They need to be honest with him as well as have a lot of affection for him. He needs attention pretty often.
Error: No! Not at all. They will never and never have believed in love at first sight. The idea to them is just… stupid. Now the traits that their future datemate would need is anger control…. sometimes Error has a hard time controlling their own anger and might say something on accident. And they need to play fair. Even if Error says something, they would never say something mean to just be mean and they want their datemate to not do it too.
Axe: Axe is the one that believes in love at first sight the most! The idea of that is… so sweet to him. Now the traits, honestly, I could picture him wanting to be with someone that he can take care of. He wants to help them and take care of them but he wants to be taken care of too. Plus, they need to be open to trying new things and… maybe help him try to do new things too.
Dusty: Dusty doesn't believe in love at fight sight. He might feel attraction to someone but he doesn't think that it is 'love'. Now traits that I think he would like for them to have is to be understanding. Sometimes he might accidentally do things and if they're bothered by it, he wants them to tell him and understand that sometimes they might do things that he doesn't like either. He doesn't want them to be too controlling or hostile to him.
Cross: Cross would want them to be respectful, Understanding, honest, and allow him to feel like he could depend on them and he hopes that they would depend on him too. Also! Yes, he believes in love at first sight but tries to act like he doesn't haha.
💔 BROKEN HEART - what could their partner do that would absolutely break their heart?
Nightmare: Pick Dream's side. Nightmare has been the second choice for so long in his life, that if his datemate chooses Dream over him, it would be one of the last straws.
Killer: Hmmm act like everything that happened was his fault. He knows that he didn't do everything really good, but he knows that he isn't 100% at fault.
Error: Bully them for their phobia of touch. It would make them react badly. There are a lot of reasons on why they don't like it.
Axe: Leave him behind. He has been left by so many people, that he isn't sure if he could handle it if his datemate left him too.
Dusty: Judging him without knowing his story.
Cross: If they ever hit him. Like just for no reason or to be abusive. Not like playful hit or when they're training together.
#Dreamtale#Dreamtale Nightmare#Dreamtale Nightmare Sans#Nightmare#Nightmare Sans#Killertale#Killertale Sans#Killer#Killer Sans#Error#Error Sans#Horrortale#Horrortale Sans#Horror#Axe#Dusttale#Dusttale Sans#Dusty#Dust Sans#Dust#Cross#Emoji Asks#Emoji
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Hi idk if I’m requesting right but 🦷 28 with johhny.
A/N: this is supposed to be like a rewrite of the scene from another perspective, dunno if it’s good though. i’m gonna be honest with ya i don’t like johnny, idk i think he’s too similar to pony in a bad way. i just don’t have an emotional attachment to him. doesn’t mean i don’t like to torture him though 🤭
Warnings: ⚠️MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH!!⚠️
Tags: angst, johnny x y/n (platonic or romantic not specified)
i burst through the hospital door, Dally and Ponyboy followed closely behind. some people tried to tell us we needed medical attention. i guess we were in bad shape after the rumble but i was just so focused on getting to johnny that i pushed past them all. Once i reached the room i slowed down and tried to seem less terrified than i was, i didn’t want to worry johnny. i saw dally’s face when he walked in and i knew he was trying to do the same thing. He sat down on the chair beside johnny’s bed and “hey johnnycake. we did it. we beat the Soc’s, they ain’t gonna bother us anymore.” Dally spoke in a soft voice, it sounded strange, dally usually wasn’t gentle. I took Johnny’s hand and smiled. “they’re still writing about you in the papers. about you being a hero and all that stuff. i’m proud of you-” Dally cut me off. his tone sounded urgent. he knew as well as i did that we didn’t have much time. johnny already looked worse than he did when we came into the room. “we all are. what you did was so brave.” As soon as those words left Dally’s mouth he beamed with pride, all he ever wanted was for dally to be proud of him. “Ponyboy.” Johnny whispered. I looked over to Ponyboy, he was in the worst shape out of the three of us and he looked like he was in a daze. he walked over to johnny who whispered some words into his ear. then his head fell to the side, and he was dead. Dally brushed a stray hair out of Johnny’s face. he sat there for a moment looking at the body before he got up suddenly and threw himself against the wall. “i shoulda seen it coming. It was always gonna end this way. if not something like this his parents would’ve killed him! Johnny… Y/N what am i gonna do now.” Before i could answer him, Dally ran out of the hospital. I felt a lump form in my throat. whatever happened dally now, it wasn’t going to be good. but i knew there was nothing i could do to stop it.
#the outsiders#ponyboy curtis#dallas winston#darry curtis#sodapop curtis#johnny cade#steve randle#two-bit mathews#dallas winston x reader#ponyboy x reader
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Oh! Hello there! Here's something different! A rare text post! I realize I interact very rarely here (and tbh interact very rarely on social media at all, in recent years) but I'm trying to figure out a nicer balance than just dead radio silence.
I guess, hi hello. I'm King -- I'm a nonbinary artist. I draw. I love video games and cute things. And I am trying to beat my anxiety over using social media back with a stick. I dunno how many of my followers are still active here, but regardless of whether you have found me recently or stuck with me for years, you guys really mean a lot to me. It's a really quiet little corner of the internet, but it's mine, and I find comfort in knowing that there's someone out there who was kind enough to take a moment out of their life to see my work.
I want to challenge myself to start posting a little more so I'm slowly posting some of my old art backlog, but maybe also just chattering mindlessly and finding comfort in blogging again.
Man, it's really been a while since I last posted a text post, huh. To be honest, somewhere in the last 2-5 years, I've developed some kind of crippling fear of being perceived and just kind of drop my art on social media like a cat dropping a dead mouse on someone's pillow for praise and just disappear back into the ether. I miss it, though! I miss interaction even if I'm not a particularly chatty person in blog form but, hell, it's a blog and it's silly to be worried about blogging... on a blog.
So here I am. I think part of the anxiety has stemmed from trying to slowly make the switch to twitter and there being so many unspoken rules of engagement on twitter that at some point it all just got all twisted up into a big ball of "well idk how to interact so I guess I won't!" and somehow that just kind of extended to pretty much every social media thing I have. It's kind of wild how hostile social media feels nowadays -- is it just me? I know I have a lot of anxiety but I hope someone out there relates!
Tumblr is a strange blogging platform, isn't it? It makes interacting with people kind of hoop-jumpy and difficult, and yet it still feels a lot more approachable than something like twitter in my opinion (my beloathed).
I've been considering making the jump to Cara seeing so many other artists do the same (and I have made an account), but to be honest, the idea of maintaining yet another social media account fills me with so much bone-deep exhaustion.
I've been really struggling with artblock recently and finding it difficult to find enjoyment in the hobby that I loved so much and has been so formative to me. It feels strangely alienating finding myself incapable of producing artwork the way I used to, but it's been a slow work in progress. Reviving my social media accounts is a step in some direction, honestly! Or at least, I'm hoping it will be.
Tangentially related, I don't draw a lot of fanart -- not because I'm not a fan of things but more because if I spend the energy on drawing, I often want to spend it on original creations (as the #1 and singular fan in that fandom LOL), but I always feel like I should do it more often -- mostly because it's such a delight to see other fans trickle in out of the woodwork. I think this every time in the rare occasions I do post fanwork, haha!
Anyways, I'm not actually expecting anyone to read this but if you did, hello! I hope you, specifically, (yes, you!!!) have the bestest of days! ;)
469th post on this blog, too. Nice.
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I dunno man fandom stuff is weird. I always abide by the rule of: if I don't like it I won't go see it. if i like it I'll be there.
and like this thing comes and goes sometimes I'm comfortable with that stuff sometimes I avoid it like it's lava on the floor.
so like for those who like some stuff or may have some questionable interests? like... from an outsiders perspective who's not familiar with utmv sans-shipping can bee seen as weird.
do I question it? no because we can't clone ourselves and make out with those clones at least the versions of ourselves from a different dimension...
(yet. unless the sci-fi futurebans these fics... that would be actually friking cool and funny ngl. would that e a perversion or just a different way of perceiving a different being as a different person with the same face...hmmm)
it's usually about adult content too.
I don't touch that. and if I do I make sure it's extremely light for the sake of my self.
that doesn't mean I hate hardcore smut blogs tho. you do you man. I will run away in terror but I admire your confidence and you will be getting a thumbs up from me from a distance where I don't see it. I'm not gonna police people just cuz I'M uncomfortable with it.
but then there's the issues of me not really recognizing where the line between strange interests and pervertedness is. like I'll be honest?
to me most sexual stuff feels... icky? so like I can't tell what's morally reprehensible more than the other? Im just sex repulsed unless I'm specifically looking for something specific for kissing references.
and like I don't dive into it to see if it's encouraging abuse or... idunno. doing bad things and glorifying it. I usually don't dig that deep because the sexual aspect is like a lili detergent.
as for blogs who do pro-shipping... uhm I don't know how I feel? I know they're probably getting hate messages and messages telling them to stop and they're a freak anyway so what good do my words do?
so like... I can never have a clear conscience about this.
I hate pro SHIPPING. the act itself. it's weird to me but I can't really bring myself to judge people who do it. I don't hate the person. I think it's kinda childish to reduce an entire human being to just one label?
[ohohoh lili supports proshippers ooooooh lilis mask is slipping]
if you think that please unfollow me. not because you're words are true they're not. but because I'M angry you think that way. I don't support pro-shipping but I'm not willing to bend over backwards to be afraid of losing followers. you're on my blog. and if we moots you deserve my sincerity.
the fandom is a dirty place. shouldn't that be expected? I mean?
or maybe I'm being stupid because I was exposed to r34 bullshit of this fandom as a kid and it's been normalized in my head.
idunno why I'm writing this I guess it's the imposter syndrome again.
being paranoid of offending people or being deceitful.
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