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#starting with unlearning the habit of trying to simultaneously take responsibility and defend myself.
benevolentvampire
ยท
1 year
Text
when you read back over a conversation and realise you handled it fucking terribly
#i wrote out a lot of tags but i realised it was a bit much so.
#the gist is i am fucking done letting my own shortsightedness destroy everything.
#i can never forgive myself for the damage I've done to someone i truly care about.
#but this is precious to me. i wont let myself destroy it and i will do whatever it takes to make things right.
#starting with unlearning the habit of trying to simultaneously take responsibility and defend myself.
#gotta do one or the other. and i know damn well which one it should be.
#im gonna post this one instead of just saving it to drafts like most of my vents because i truly wanna hold myself to it.
#i accept that in this situation there's gonna be times i can't do anything and things i can't help with
#but everything that i can i will. im holding myself to that.
#i really hate that i got into that habit in the first place like. i never even wanted to defend myself.
#and yet somehow i was trying to anyway.
#enough of that.
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