#sommalier

[tripleseptet]

SOMMALIER! Your finest rocks, please. Igneous, if possible. And for the lady, an adult alligator, over 12 feet long. The longer the better— money is no object when it comes to gifts for my beloved.

[the-acid-pear]

Ai Dungeoners update: It is over 🥹

CHANCES WERE DIM, I STORMED INTO BATTLE WITH JUST 5 PEOPLE. KOSHKA DIED A TRAGIC DEATH TRYING TO PROTECT HIS FAMILY TO NO AVAIL, KETCHUP LOST A HAND AND TANLA HER WILL, BUT WE SURVIVED. WE TOOK ON A RAID THAT COST THE LIFE OF undisclosed female daughter who has now been erased from history BUT NO LIMBS WERE LOST. WE HAD TO RUN, FAST. WE WERE JUST 5, THEY WERE GETTING STRONGER, WE HAD NO LEGACY POINTS TO AFFORD TO HIRE SOMEONE STRONGER LIKE Berdly who btw is carrying TWO artifacts?? Op fucker SO WE JUST RUSHED TO PUT AN END TO THIS. AND WE WERE ASSISTED BY QUINTON FROM BEYOND THE GRAVE WHO SENT US HIS LITTLE SOLDIERS. I FEAR WE'D HAVE LOST MORE WITHOUT THEM. IN THE END WE ALL MANAGED TO KILL THEM: KETCHUP, NIX, TANLA, undisclosed female daughter that has now been erased from history 2, AND, um, who, who else? OH RIGHT AND DANICA, WHO UNFORTUNATELY LOST HER WEIRD ASS DOG SOMMALIER BUT ITS OK SHE DID SO MUCH FOR US AND WILL BE FOREVER REMEMBERED AS THE HERO SHE WAS. TOGETHER THEY BEAT THE UNBEATABLE. THE AI DUNGEONERS DID IT‼️

[mood2you]

Sommalier : Due to professional reasobs I will be drinking all weekrnd

Sommalier : 😎

All the sommaliers coworkers (yaeah!) and boss (oh...) : YEAH!! Fishing trip! Fishing trip! Modelo Bud Lite! Yeah!

[a-star-that-fell]

i cannot fucking believe there is a b&w special where cilan goes to johto and meets brock but neither of them actually introduces themselves to the other

[eacbooks]

La Semeuse (Three Volumes), Patres Patriae (One Volume)

https://www.abebooks.com/servlet/BookDetailsPL?bi=30889725202&searchurl=sortby%3D0%26vci%3D65071755&cm_sp=snippet-_-srp1-_-title6

[hspn]

The dress code for the evening

Me: I love this pic because it makes me want to know what they were told the dress code was.

Brother: I had the same reaction as everyone: how can the Italian be the worst dressed? The shoes are bad and his tie is way too long.

Me: Yeah, when I saw the whole outfit, I was like ouch. The tie is also not a good color for that outfit, or actually maybe it is.

Pernille: Atomic Blonde-type assassin

César: your sommalier for the evening

Jorginho: your drunk uncle who just woke up and got dressed in the car

Tuchel: NBA coach

Emma: everyone's mom making sure everyone is having a good time and eating enough

Lukaku: youth pastor

Mendy: your dad's cool best friend. I thought he looked the best.

Mason: airline pilot.

I presume Kanté didn't show because César didn't tie his bow tie for him.

Brother: Mount has all that crap on his lapels. He’s trying to beat Jorginho for worst dressed. This is the first time he has worn black tie and he decided he needed a bunch of shit that distracts from the tux.

Me: At least he fixed his hair, but yeah, I found his lapels distracting. If we're lucky, Pernille will Atomic Blonde them on the way home and make sure neither of those outfits survive.

[beardedmrbean]

LA PLATA, Md. -- A 28-year-old man is suspected of killing his ex-girlfriend, two of her relatives and another man inside a Maryland home before fatally shooting himself, authorities said Saturday.

The five deceased individuals were found inside the La Plata residence Friday afternoon when an unidentified homeowner arrived after work, the Charles County Sheriff's Office said in a news release Saturday afternoon.

According to a preliminary investigation, the sheriff's office said Andre Sales, 28, entered the home and killed his ex-girlfriend, 21-year-old Sara Mann; her brother, Kai Mann, 18; their mother, Sommaly Mann, 48; and another man who was inside, Jovon Watson, 23 of White Plains.

Sales, who lived at a different residence, then shot himself with a gun that was later recovered, according to the sheriff's office.

Two young children were initially unaccounted for but were located a short time later unharmed at a different location, the sheriff's office said. La Plata is about 35 miles (56 kilometers) south of Washington, D.C.

Investigators and forensic personnel were still processing evidence Saturday and interviewing family and friends to establish a motive, the news release said. The Office of the Chief Medical Examiner in Baltimore will perform autopsies to confirm the cause of death for each person.

[prowrestlingindustrialcomplex]

Reginald went from Carmella’s Sommalier to Nia Jax’s Sugar Baby.

[belleandkurtbastian]

what pic.twitter.com/1NorYCiLst

— keyboard switch sommalier (@randileeharper) July 6, 2020

[allegaeon]

a vampire sommalier: Ah yes O+ type, italian, aged 53 years. Subtle hints of alcoholism in youth and......

[merlions]

pretty sure this was the "the world's first water sommalier" guyin zac efron's nature documentary series? in the ep about Paris. when he gives zac efron and anna kendrick mysterious forbidden slovakian water

i believe every word of what this man says

[compostwizard]

KalliDdh- skuskull afficionado /// ///\ turtle neck sweater collector \ wannabe sommalier \ connoisseurdirt afic \ coffee addicyt

[silentlyadesire-blog]

In misura maggiore o minore dobbiamo tutti affrontare ansia e stress, aiutati dal cocktail di sostanze chimiche prodotte dal corpo e rilasciate dal cervello. Il gruppo più importante di queste sostanze è quello delle endorfine. Le endorfine sono neurotrasmettitori peptidici che hanno la proprietà di alleviare il dolore. Ansia, stress e dolore azionano un meccanismo di difesa naturale che produce endorfine.  Quando assumiamo oppiacei - in particolare morfina, oppio ed eroina - l'organismo smette di produrre endorfine. Quando smettiamo di assumere oppiacei bisogna affrontare un intervallo che va dai cinque ai quattordici giorni prima che inizi un nuovo ciclo di produzione delle endorfine. Nel frattempo, in quell'interminabile periodo di agonia, impariamo cosa siano realmente ansia, stress e dolore.  _ Pensa a tutte le volte nella tua vita che hai avuto paura, ma paura sul serio. Qualcuno che striscia alle tue spalle quando credi di essere da solo, e urla per spaventarti. Una banda di teppisti che ti circonda. Quando in un sogno cadi da una grande altezza, o sei in bilico su un precipizio. Qualcuno che ti tiene sotto l'acqua, e senti che il respiro ti manca, e ti agiti, cerchi di divincolarti, di tornare verso la superficie. Perdi il controllo dell'auto e vedi che stai finendo contro un muro e urli ma non esce alcun suono. Bene, somma tutti questi terrori, e percepiscili tutti in una volta, nello stesso istante, un'ora dopo l'altra, giorno dopo giorno. _ E pensa ai dolori che hai provato... la scottatura con l'olio bollente, il taglio con un vetro affilato, un osso che si rompe, il pietrisco che ti scortica quando scivoli e cadi su una strada d'inverno, il mal di testa, il mal d'orecchi e il mal di denti. Sommali insieme, mescola tutte le sensazioni che ti strizzano le budella e ti fanno rabbrividire, e provale tutte in una volta, un'ora dopo l'altra, giorno dopo giorno. _ Poi pensa a tutte le angosce che hai sperimentato. Ricorda la morte di una persona cara. Il rifiuto di una persona che amavi. Ricorda i sentimenti di fallimento, vergogna e il rimorso più amaro. Sommali insieme, mescola tutte le pene che ti hanno trafitto il cuore e provale tutti in una volta, un'ora dopo l'altra, giorno dopo giorno.  _ Questa è l'astinenza. Il 'tacchino freddo', ciò che provi quando smetti di farti di eroina senza l'aiuto di altre sostanze. E' come essere scuoiati vivi.  _ L'angoscia aggredisce la mente priva di difese e fa impazzire uomini e donne. Ogni tossicodipendente in astinenza è fuori di testa. La pazzia è così violenta e feroce che qualcuno non riesce a sopravvivere. E nella follia temporanea di quel mondo straziato, quando si è scuoiati vivi dal dolore, si commette ogni crimine. Chi riesce a sopravvivere e si disintossica, quando a distanza di anni ricorda i crimini commessi in quei momenti, prova un sentimento d'incredulità, di umiliazione e di disgusto, come un soldato che sotto tortura sia stato costretto a tradire i suoi camerati e la patria.

Gregory David Roberts, Shantaram.

[silvershadow1711]

Excuse me while I gush for a sec

Awmigod, I finally installed Dandy Shot (Pub Encounter in english) on my new phone. The problem was transfering the save data from my old, deactivated phone to this one (cuz fuck if I'm paying $6 for somehing I already bought). But I'm so happy to see it again. Dandy Shot is the only otome game (dating simulator for straight girls) I've seen where you can romance older men- hell, you can ONLY romance older men here, that's the point. The only other hot old guy I've been able to woo was Maynard in Cinderella Contract, but due to the art style, even he looks like he's in his early thirties at most (even though I'm pretty sure he's in his late forties, judging by his shitstain of a son). But I don't even give a fuck about all the older dudes thirsty for me in Dandy Shot, because they're all annoying losers, save one.

SOICHIRO!!! If this man were real, I would scour the earth looking for him. Disdain the concept of marriage as I do, I would drop to one knee and propse to him on sight. He's a sixty year old world class sommalier (and apparent martial arts expert) who owns the bar where you and your oyajii harem get shitfaced. He is the most precious cinnamon bun. He's constantly spouting off philosophy just cause...

The first time he kisses you, it's after he convinces you to eat a poisonous plant, just to show you it won't kill you (he's a total troll, and everyone knows it). Every other guy's route is drama and sex. His is all friendship and slow burning romance and lots of foreplay, because he really has a thing for making sure you constantly have blue balls. As soon as I saw Gunther's portrait when his japanese profile was revealed, all I could do was pray, "Please let me marry him. I want him to be like Soichiro..." And he is, as much as you can condense a twelve chapter slow burn romance into four conversations.

Unfortunately, you can't respond with "Yes I'm fucking sure, because I'm a grown-ass woman who's capable of making decisions!" because protagonist-chan is a classic demure good girl who wouldn't say "Help" if she was on fire. But that's what self-insert fantasies are for (this is the only game where I've ever used my real name... well, nickname).

Seriously. I love this shit more than you can believe (only my love of Fates comes close). I adore Soichiro so much I bought the Dandy Shot drama cd he's in. From Japan, and in Japanese. Which I have NO understanding of. But men whispering seductively into your ear transceeds language.

Fuck that other guy- he's a rapist in training. But Soichiro's voice is so fucking deep. Like... Japanese!Xander deep.

...okay, I'm done.

[danbensen]

I've been wrestling recently with why I like some books and don't like others, which has led me to drinking thinking more deeply about what genre fiction delivers to its readers. 

 Emotional investment. That sense of what will happen to them next?? Also called "story" or "characterization." Common to all types of fiction, and even some non-fiction. If the reader cares about the protagonist, the book is Sweet. If not, it's Dry.

Factual accuracy. Important to science fiction, fantasy, mystery, and historical fiction. If your book educates the reader, it is Full-bodied. If not, it's Light.

Internal consistency. The basis by which fantasy and science fiction are judged, also called "plausibility," "believably," or "good world-building." If your book thoroughly explores the ramifications of your conceit, it is Rich. If not, it's Fruity.

Real-world parallels. Also called "metaphor," "theme," or "being topical." Especially important in science fiction and fantasy. If this book really makes the reader think, it is  Balanced. If not, it's Bitter.

Excitement. Do interesting things happen in the book? Also called "plot," or "escapism value." Like alcohol in wine, it's what we're really hear for, even if we don't admit it. If your book entertains the reader, it is Sharp. If not, it's Round.

And there's writing style, which is like the packaging the wine comes in. Much as we hate to admit it, wine really does taste worse when it comes out a bag, and it's harder to enjoy a story when the author can't tell a comma from an apostrophe. If the author has an impressive turn of phrase, their book is Beautifully-presented. if not, it's Poorly-presented.

Let's try out this system on some of the books I've read (and enjoyed) recently:

Diaspora��by Greg Egan: A rather dry book, but one of the most full-bodied I've ever read, and extremely rich. It's more balanced than a book about 30th-century simulated minds might appear, and decently sharp, presented competently if not not elegantly. 4/5 stars. It would have rated higher if he hadn't rushed the ending, which was so dry it seemed pointless.

The Hanging Tree by Ben Aaronovitch: Very sweet, and full-bodied in its portrayal of the metropolitan police and its account of London history seen through architecture, reinforced by a rich magical system. It's a bit bitter, but only because Aaronovich doesn't have any particular political ax to grind, which I appreciate. The last book in the series was a round for my taste, but this one is as sharp as any, with plenty of explosions and car-hurling. Presentation is competent. 5/5 stars. I love Peter!

Babylon's Ashes by James S.A. Corey. The beginning of the series was dry, but now that I've gotten attached to the characters, I don't mind. It's a bit light, not dwelling very deeply on the technical aspects of anything, but at least it doesn't make up technobabble, and it's quite rich, especially with the economic ramifications of new technology. This book is quite political, but presents its argument well, and its balance is the main reason I love it. It's also one of the sharpest books in the series, with space-battles and civil unrest. Presentation is competent ( as you can see, I don't much care about presentation). 5/5 stars. It got me through some tough times. 

 And you can't see which books I hated unless you're my friend on facebook :) So what do you think? Does this system of classifying books help anyone? Can you suggest some pairings? What kind of book is the best accompany to a day at the beach, for example? A boring bus ride? Five minutes in bed before you fall asleep?   

[jasonxavier]

Bless you for giving us Sommalier!Beau

Thank you, dear anon