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xoxo-teddybear · 3 years

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What Have I Done? - Bakugou Katsuki- pt.2

Bakugou x f!reader

Warnings: Angst, Mentions of suicidal thoughts, fluff, insane behavior, nsfw, noncon! Dubcon!, murder, stalking, abusive behavior, yandere!Bakugou, cursing, blood, lowkey kinda slow burn (meaning the beginning is a little boring BUT IT GETS GOOD I SWEAR😭)

Ep. Warnings: Angst, hitting, cursing, stalking, kidnapping, murder

Summary: It’s been awhile since you’ve left him. Two months actually but it was two months too long. Katsuki was slowly going insane and I guess you could say he officially has because he’s officially snapped. You become his main target, his number one priority, his entire being even though you’re trying to leave him. But Katsuki won’t let you. You’re his..and in the words of Bakugou Katsuki..you always will be.

A/N: ....I made it a yandere story y’all. OH SHI-

BAKUGOU’S MASTERLIST

Chapter 1

Twitch, twitch, twitch. That’s all Katsuki’s body been doing. Either his eyes or his fingers, his body is uncomfortably moving. Shit doesn’t feel right for him. And he knows exactly why. You left him.

The first week was horrible. All Katsuki did was cry. He even kept his destroyed home in shambles because he couldn’t find the motivation to do anything. If it wasn’t for Kirishima, Katsuki would have starved himself to death. The second week was just as bad. Nothing but a crying baby being taken care of by his best friend.

The third week is when Katsuki become a drunkard. He made Kirishima and the boys of the Bakusquad constantly take him out whenever. As long as the place served alcohol, he would go. He would go and drink himself to sleep. While he was intoxicated he would cry about how he misses you and how he was a terrible husband. He always said you deserved better but he was too in love with you to let you go. The 4th week was pretty much the same.

After a whole month without you, Katsuki threw himself into depression. For the entirety of the second month, he locked himself within the walls of his home. Thankfully, it was now considered a home environment once again after his dear friends cleaned the place up for him. Katsuki stayed inside all day, drank his soul away every night, and sobbed constantly. Constantly regretting how he neglected you, how he mistreated you, and how he hurt you. He doesn’t even know how he even brought himself to do that. Even though he’s been alone for almost 2 months, he still had hope that you would come back. That things would go back to normal and he would be a better husband to you, just like he promised.

Katsuki felt himself going mad and slipping away, but what pulled the trigger was what Kirishima brought to him on the 6th week.

—

Flashback

“WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?”

Katsuki looked down at the papers in his hands. Kirishima had walked in with a nervous and sad look on his face when he gave Katsuki the papers you had the red head deliver. “Sorry man...”

Katsuki shook as he stared at the divorce papers with wide eyes. He saw you already signed it and all the paper needed was his signature. His face grew dark as something in his mind snapped. Katsuki turned to his friend and instructed him to get out of his home.

“What? Man are you alright?” Kirishima said. He walked to his best friend and when he reached a hand out for him, Katsuki pulled on his arm and pushed him out the door. He slammed it shut and locked it as he looked at the papers.

A scary smile grew on the man’s face. His eyes grew crazy as he laughed maniacally. Hysterically. As if what he held was the most hilarious thing in the world. His palms began to spark as he used his quirk to destroyed the papers. The quick blast made his hair floof around a bit and when it was over, a pile of ashes lay at his feet.

“She-....she thinks she can leave me?” Bakugou began to walk to the framed picture on the coffee table. He picked up the picture of you both on your last anniversary and ran his finger over the image of you. “Poor Princess....you can’t leave me. You need me. Just as much as I need you. I mean..hehe...look at what I mess I’ve been. I can only assume you must be worse. But it’s okay, love...I’ll find you soon enough..and I’ll help you feel better,” he walked to his bedroom and layed down on the soft mattress as he held the frame close to his chest as he stared sinisterly at the ceiling, “and we’ll never be apart again.”

—

The 7th week was when it began. Katsuki took some time off of work. He was gonna be too busy for hero work. He had something much more important to do. He had to bring you home.

Katsuki spent the 7th week looking for information on you. He was up 24/7 reading all he can, talking to as many people as he can, and doing all the digging he could until he found you. Unfortunately for him but luckily for you, he found nothing. It pissed him off. How could you have completely erased your existence? Did you just go into hiding or was he not searching hard enough.

This time, the luck switched. Katsuki was just walking to the store when he looked to the far side and saw you in a cab. He had to do a double take to make sure he wasn’t mistaken but after a good glance and taking a picture for confirmation, he knew it was you. His body almost betrayed him as he almost went in to run after you but luckily his brain stopped him. He had to think. Katsuki hid in an alleyway nearby as he watched you from the side. When the driver continued down the road, that’s when he began to follow you. He used his hero training and quirk to keep up with the car. He followed you for miles until the cab finally stopped at some hotel. He watched you walk in and decided this was far enough.

He knew where you were now. He could wait a little longer before snatching you up. If he did it now in broad daylight, chaos would break out. He had to wait for the perfect moment to get you back. He was okay with waiting. He knew where you’ve been staying, how to get there, and knew what time you got back from wherever that cab picked you up. And then it hit him. The cab.

Katsuki went back to look at the picture he took of you in the cab and checked the license plate. With this information, he went home to find where the vehicle was.

Katsuki busted the door open to his home and ran straight to his in-home office. He went to log onto his work laptop that he used for hero work. The laptop contained the tools and websites that would allow him to find the cab. He finally reached the site he was looking for and went back to the picture. There, he typed in the license plate number.

“よ 57-342” he whispered aloud. Finally, he located the vehicle and went to find it. Katsuki followed the location until he found the house where the driver stayed. He waited in hiding, hoping someone would come out and hoped that the someone would be the driver. He waited and waited until finally, after almost 2 hours of waiting, a man came out. Katsuki quickly pulled up the picture and made sure it was the same person who was driving you, and to his luck, it was.

He quickly ran to the driver before he could get into the cab and pulled him into a dark corner. He slammed the man up against the wall and pulled up a picture of you. “Listen! You dropped this girl off at a hotel, I need to know where you picked her up! Tell me! Now!”

“W-whoa!” The driver exclaimed as he took notice of Katsuki’s identity. “Y-you’re Dynamight!”

Katsuki sucked his teeth at the fact that this guy knew who he was but then again, he wasn’t surprised. He was the number 2 hero after all. “Yeah! I am! Now tell me where you picked up my wife you dog-faced loser!” He screamed.

“Y-you’re wife??” The man looked at the picture and recognized you and the name you gave him. “Oh! M-Miss Y/N! Yes! Uh-..uh- I- she- I- ..I picked her up from a gym!” The man exclaimed.

“What gym?! Tell me!!!” Bakugou shouted at the man.

“I-I’m sorry! I don’t know if I can! She- she said she got divorced so how can I trust you’re her husband?!” The man shouted in fear.

“Are you calling me a liar?! I’m a fucking pro-hero! Why would I pull some bullshit like that! Tell me where my wife was! What?! Gym?!” Bakugou screamed once more. In fear, the man gave Katsuki the information he needed.

“Hosu Gym!” The man shook and Bakugou stared for a minute to scare the poor guy before dropping him to the ground. As he walked away, the man spoke up once more. “D-Dynamight, sir. I-If miss Y/N doesn’t want to see you..and you’re forcing information out of people..I’ll have to tell the authorities..sir.”

“You’re not gonna do a damn thing. You hear me?!” The pro screamed. Bakugou side eyed the man as he watched the driver get up from the ground.

“Sir. From the small conversation we had in the car, Miss Y/N said she was divorced-“

“We aren’t divorced!!” Bakugou said as he made a random explosion to intimidate the man. “We are still together, and she is still my wife, and none of this is any of your business!” Bakugou began to walk away but heard the driver grumble something under his breath that triggered something in his brain.

“I can see why she left a crazed man like you...” the driver mumbled. Katsuki quickly snapped his body to face the man and jumped on him. His burning hand found it’s way around the man’s neck and began to squeeze.

“The hell did you say?! You’re gonna wish you never said that you fucking fool, cuz now those are gonna be your last words!” Bakugou said before he activated an explosion and killed the man. Katsuki took deep breaths before realizing what he did and for some reason, he felt no remorse. And he knows why.

“That idiot should’ve known better than to talk about me and Y/N like that...s’his own fault he died.” Bakugou said before walking away from the gruesome scene. He acted like nothing happened as he made his way to Hosu Gym. He just needed to know what time your got there and when. Then, he could finally go home before continuing his plan for the next day.

—

The blonde decided to wait for some time before he went into the building. It was getting dark and so the gym would be closing soon. He waited and waited until finally, the place was empty. Empty except for the man who worked at the front desk.

Katsuki slipped in right before closing and hid himself in the locker room. He waited 10 minutes before going out and finding the one employee he saw. After exploring the area, Katsuki found the man sitting on a bench. He snuck up behind him, and pounced. He covered the man’s mouth as he tugged him into the back room. Once inside, The blonde threw the man in and locked the door to prevent anyone getting in or out.

“W-What is going on? D-Dynamight, what is happening?” The employee asked in fear. He assumed a threat was going on or some trouble was taking place outside of the gym. He had no idea the trouble was standing right in front of him.

“I need you to tell me when this lady came in.” Bakugou said and pulled up a picture of you. The man looked at the picture and shook his head.

“I’m sorry, but I don’t recognize-“

“YOU WILL! This woman came in here today and I need to know what time! TELL ME!” Bakugou screamed as he lit sparks in his palm. The man shook in fear at the hero’s booming voice and began to look harder. After a minute, he finally spoke.

“I- I remember. She came in hours ago! Sometime around 12 to 2!” The man said in hopes the yelling would stop. It didn’t.

“ARE YOU FUCKING STUPID?! There’s a huge space in between! I need to know exactly what time she came in! Don’t you morons have a sign in?!” Bakugou screamed.

“We do! We do sir!” The man nodded his head in fear. Bakugou huffed before walking over to him and dragging him by his collar to seat him on the chair in front of the computer.

“Then get into your data base and FIND MY WIFE!” The blonde screamed. The worker nodded frantically before getting right into it. Bakugou watched his every move and the computer. He kept a sparkling hand right next to the man’s head to keep him intimidated as he worked. Eventually, Bakugou saw your profile picture on the screen when the man scrolled down. “Stop. Her. Check what time she came in.”

The man read the drafts and spoke. “1:30 p.m.”

Bakugou nodded before walking to the door and unlocking it. He turned to the trembling man and gave a quick warning with a sinister smile. “If I ever find out that you told anybody, even your own damn friends or family, about what happened tonight, I won’t hesitate to come back and kill you. Am I clear?”

The man gave a quick and jittery “y-yes sir!” As he watched the pro-hero leave the room. Once Bakugou was gone, the man let out a breath of relief and allowed the few tears he was holding back to fall. Bakugou Katsuki definitely struck fear into those of the lives he met.

With this simple information, Bakugou smirked as he walked out the gym doors. He knows where you live, what gym you go to, what day you go, and what time you arrive. You were always a very punctual person. You had a schedule and you followed it through and through. He completely trusted the fact that when he came back here next week, he would be sure to see you. All he had to do now was wait 7 days.

—

7 days have passed and Katsuki was waiting for your presence in the gym. After finding out you arrived at 1:30, he showed up almost an hour earlier at 12 just in case. He waited and waited for you to show. He was almost out of patience, but after seeing that it was only 1:00, he settled the slightest bit. It wasn’t until he took notice of a familiar figure at the desk.

The man Katsuki had threaten nights ago was shivering and shaking in his boots as he greeted people at the door. He was aware that the pro hero was in the building and after the incident of what went down that night, he was definitely scared for his life. Bakugou began to walk to the man and said man could feel a scary aura coming around. When he turned, he was greeted with the sight of a smirking Katsuki.

“Hey friend,” Bakugou said with his hands in his pockets.

The man jumped at the sound of his voice and his scary presence made his eyes teary. “H-Hello Dynamight.”

“Thought I’d just come by to warn you again. When Y/N walks through those doors, don’t you fucking dare try telling her about me or my presence here. Got that.....” Katsuki said looking down at the man’s name tag. “Hiro Itadori? ‘Cuz if you do, your body goes boom. Understand?”

“Y-Yes Sir!” Hiro said as he looked to the ground with wide eyes as he felt himself break into a cold sweat. Bakugou patted the man’s back, causing him to flinch but when the hero walked away right after, Hiro calmed down. Unfortunately, that only lasted for about a second before you walked in.

“Hello Hiro!” You joyfully said. Your voice reached the ears of your ex-husband. Or more so, your “supposed to be” ex-husband. His ears perked up and he smirked as he hid behind a corner wall, taking the view of you in.

“Y/N.” He whispered to himself. He smiled and a blush bloomed on his porcelain skin as he admired you from afar. You were just as beautiful as he remembered. If anything, your looks seemed to have only gotten better. He watched as the man nervously greeted you and allowed you to go through with your workout. Katsuki smirked as he knew the man gave no hint at him being there, and so he would be able to watch you in peace.

Katsuki wasn’t there to keep tabs on your workout and what exercises you did. He was there just to watch you. Of course, while doing so, he admired you, but he was there to gain selfish intel. He watched you from start to end. Once you finished he followed you to your next location. It was still early and so it was safe to assume you weren’t heading to bed yet. He followed you back to your hotel and waited in another area until you walked out again. Sure enough, you did.

For the rest of the day, Bakugou followed and stalked your every move. He watched where you work, where you spent your free time, he followed you to the new cafe you seemed to enjoy, and then he followed you back to your hotel. Instead of waiting in another area and watching from afar, Bakugou climbed the side of the building and watched you from your hotel balcony through the glass door. He payed attention to your every move and noted what time you went to bed. Satisfied with the day’s revelations, he went back to his own home.

Knowing this information, Katsuki was able to sleep a little more peacefully. For the next few weeks, Katsuki followed this procedure. He became a full time stalker, even going so far as to call out of work for some time to put his full attention in you. He watched you like a hawk. He took note of everywhere you went, where you ate, who you spoke to, and what you did. All of it became engraved into his brain.

Now, Katsuki stood at your balcony for the umpteenth time as he stared at your sleeping form. It was deep into the night and with the moonlight on his back, he found enough courage and craze to open the door. He walked in quietly and shut the door, blocking the chilly air from seeping in to awaken your unconscious state. He approached your bed and crouched down to meet your face.

“Still as perfect as ever,” he whispered as he removed a few strands of hair out of your face. His touch didn’t seem to startle you and Katsuki took it as your body naturally indulging in his familiar touch. He blushed at the feeling of your oh so soft skin as his fingertips grazed your pillowy cheeks. His hand finally cupped the side of your face as his thumb drew circles along your skin. Your head unconsciously nuzzled into his warmth like it used to and Katsuki couldn’t help but smile. “Don’t worry Teddy Bear...I’ll bring you home soon.”

With that, Katsuki leaned down and softly placed a kiss on your lips. This was the lightest kiss he ever bestowed upon you. The pressure and weight was similar to a feather and the blonde struggled to restrain himself once he came in contact. He craved more but his mind knew better. Reluctantly, he pulled away and removed his hand from your face. He walked away, back to the balcony to take his leave but not before turning to look back at you. “Real soon.”

—

You woke up to a sense of familiarity in your room. Although you were alone, you could’ve sworn there was this chilling presence. It was faint but it was there. Taking in a breath and looking around at your surroundings, you reluctantly got out of bed and got ready for the day.

You did the usual. Got ready, got dressed, had breakfast, and went about your day. You went to the market to picked up a few things and ended up staying much longer than you liked. You walked in during daylight and came out when the sun was setting. You sighed in disappointment.

“Guess I can skip the gym this one time. I might as well get back home, read a book or two..” you went on talking to yourself about your schedule. You walked with the groceries in hand as you enjoyed the scenery on your way back, however, even with the shining sun creating it’s golden hour with a beautiful purple sky, you couldn’t help but feel wary of the stillness in the wind.

—

‘Where the fuck is she?!’ Bakugou thought to himself. He waited at the gym all damn day. He waited and waited to see your beautiful face but you never showed. If he had known that you would’ve skipped out on the gym today he wouldn’t have came here and wasted his time. Today was supposed to be the day. The day you came home.

Shaking off his negative thoughts, Bakugou continued with his backup plan. Although it would hurt his soul to bring harm to his precious princess, he reminded himself that he was doing this for her. He’s been so broken for the past months, he could only imagine how destroyed you must be. Hurting you was his way of helping you.

And so, Bakugou made his way to your hotel, where he found himself standing infront of your glass door at your balcony. To his dismay, you weren’t there. He released a huff before climbing down and once again, began to wait. He waited and waited in hiding, constantly on the lookout for you. It’s hard to find you in the city when you don’t follow your daily schedule, but knowing where you currently resided to get your rest made his job much easier.

Finally, after some time, he heard the familiar and comforting sound of your humming voice as you sang a little song to yourself. Bakugou took the sight of you in and blushed at your beauty from afar. He allowed himself to soak in the sound of your pretty voice before making his move. “Sorry Princess.”

—

You finally made it to the hotel. After your long stroll, you couldn’t wait to get some rest. Except, the closer you got, the more tense you became. You could feel the suspenseful aura in the air and your pace soon slowed down. Eventually, you came to a stop as your nerves got the best of you.

“Hello?” You said in the wind. You looked around and saw nothing but the pitch black night illuminated by the street lights and stars.

“Is someone there?” You asked again, turning your head another direction. Nothing but leaves in the wind. You released a sigh and continued your walk but became startled due to the sound of squirrels fighting in the trees.

“Ah!” You screamed and dropped your bag. After taking notice of the two animals going at it, you chuckled to yourself and turned to pick up your bag, unfortunately being startled once again at the sight of shoes in front of you. “AH!”

You jumped back in fear and took a fighting stance before you settled and relax at the sight of your supposed ex-husband. “Bakugou..it’s just you.”

“Mm, nope.” Bakugou said as he bent down to pick up your bag and hand it to you. “It’s Katsuki.”

His words sent your eyes rolling as you took your bag back with a hesistant hand. Something seemed..off.

“Not anymore. Thanks for the help. Bye.” You attempted to walk on to your hotel entrance but his arm stopped you.

“What? That’s it? Thanks? Bye?” Bakugou asked while gently pushing your body back in front of him. “We should talk, Y/N.”

“There’s nothing to talk abou-“

“There is.” Bakugou said with a firm voice, grabbing your full attention. Seeing your doe eyes look at him with caution caused him to settle. Bakugou sighed through his nose and allowed his hands to rest on your waist. “I miss you, Y/N. I want you to come back home.”

You shook your head at the idea and scrunched your eyes as you tried to step out of his hold. “Bakugou..”

“Hear me out, okay? It won’t be like last time, Teddy Bear-“

“You don’t know that-“

“I do. Because I’m going to try harder for you and I’m going to hold onto you and I’m not gonna ruin us for a second time. I still love you Y/N. I always have and I always will.” Bakugou sweetly said. You looked at him with the same eyes of caution before you placed your hands over his, giving him a sign of hope.

“I’m sorry, Bakugou,” you said, pulling his hands off of your waist. “I sent divorce papers. I don’t want to be with you anymore. I don’t love you anymore.”

“You don’t mean that.” Bakugou said with full confidence. Although you pulled his hands away from your waist, you still allowed him to keep a hold on your own hands.

“...I should.” You said looking down. With each word of denial, Bakugou took a step closer, invading your personal space. “You should get going-“

“No, Y/N-“

“Bakugou-“

“Baby. I know you still want me. I know you still love me and I know you’re excited that I’m back. I love you...and you love me. So just admit it.” He said, inches away from your face. You stared in his eyes with a look of longing...and a hint of love. He was right. You did still love him. But after the neglect and harm he’s brought you, you didn’t know if you did want to go back. You didn’t know.

Sensing your hesistation, Bakugou slowly moved in to close the gap between you two. His hands let go off yours as he wrapped his arms around your waist. His face inched closer to yours and when you didn’t stop him, he continued. Finally, he gently placed his lips upon your own and you’d be lying if you said you didn’t feel something again. His kisses always brought a comforting feeling of butterflies in your stomach and after a second of feeling his warm lips, you kissed him back. Your hands found way around his neck as you pulled him in deeper and you could feel Bakugou smile into the kiss. It was hot and passionate. You were out in the open but for a moment it felt like no one else in the world existed. You would’ve gotten lost in the kiss had it not been for you remembering the situation you were in with the man.

Reluctantly, you gently pushed Bakugou off of you, but he still managed to press his forehead to your own. “Katsuki...you should go home.”

“Not without you.” He softly said. You shook your head as you completely pushed him off of you and gathered your things.

“Please...just go.” You said and began to walk away but Bakugou held onto your arm to stop you from moving any further.

“I’m not leaving without you, Y/N. Come home.” He stated.

“Bakugou! Just leave!” You shouted as you turned to him. When you faced the blonde man, you were shocked to see a crazed smile decorating his face.

“Too bad. I’m not asking Y/N. I’m telling. You’re coming home with me. Tonight.” He said and you scoffed at him with slight fear.

“You’re crazy!” You said and tried to shake his hold off of you, but of course failed.

“About you? Yes.” He said as he pulled you in closer. You squirmed against his hold until he pressed you in his chest and kept you in his grasp. You continued to fight against him but he grabbed your face with one hand to force you to stop and look at him.

“Let me go!”

“Listen! You either come home with me the easy way..or my way.” He warned. You looked at him with fear laced all around your face as you watched his insane side surface. You began to squirm again and fight once more.

“I’m not going!” You spat. Bakugou just released a simple laugh before caressing the side of your face.

“Yes. You are.” With that, the gentle hand on the side of your face formed into a first as he swung and knocked you out. You dropped unconscious in his hold and Bakugou was quick to carry you princess style and walk away, abandoning your groceries on the sidewalk.

“Shoulda listened. Cant believe you forced me to hurt you like that, baby.” Bakugou spoke to your unconscious state as he walked back home through dead city streets. “Don’t worry though, I’ll take care of you once we make it back. And then, we’ll never be apart again. I promise.”

—

You awoke to chains being locked on your wrist that were tied against a headboard. You layed on a large mattress in a dark room with a dim light. As you looked around, you recognized the familiar place. The place you used to make love for hours with your ex-husband. The place where movie dates and cuddle sessions were a must. The place you locked yourself in before leaving your last relationship. Katsuki’s bedroom.

You tried to jump out of bed but the restraints pulled you back down. You tried to scream and only muffled sounds could be heard. Katsuki taped your mouth shut. You tried using your quirk but it didn’t work. You looked to your restraints and saw the cuffs he used to hold you were quirk restraining cuffs. With nothing else to do, you tossed and turned in the bed as you allowed the muffled sounds to be as loud as they could. Eventually, the ruckus you were making brought the attention of your captor. Katsuki Bakugou.

Hearing all the noise, Bakugou busted opened the door to be met with your frustrated and teary eyes. You glared at him as he smirked at your locked up state. He took the opportunity to walk up to you and caress your face.

“I’m so sorry I had to hit you baby,” he said leaning down to place a kiss on your forehead. “But you left me with no choice. All you had to do was come home on your own free will and I wouldn’t have had to do all that.”

You began to tremble with anger and fear as you stared up at the man. Your teary eyes challenged his insane rubies as he sat on the side of the bed.

“How does it feel to be back? Hm?” He asked, ripping off the tape. You groaned at the pain and grew sick as you saw Bakugou pervertedly lick his lips at the sound. You leaned back and huffed with heavy breath before answering him.

“What the hell is wrong with you?! Let me go!” You screamed. He only looked at you in confusion as another sinister smile took place on his lips.

“Why would I do that, Teddy Bear?” He asked, allowing his thumb to create sweet and soft circles on your cheek.

“I don’t want you anymore Katsuki! I don’t want to be with you!” Bakugou merely raised a brow at your words and continued to listen. “You burned me-“

*SMACK*

You looked at the man in front of you with fear and shock written on your face. Your cheek stung as your face now turned to the side but Bakugou quickly changed that by taking you by your chin to make you face him and wrapped a hand around your neck, chocking you. You gasped for air as Bakugou’s smirk became replaced with a frown and his brows became pointed.

“How dare you?! You’re asking what’s wrong with me but what the hell is wrong with you?! You left me, for months, Y/N. I was heartbroken. I was basically dead with you gone. I did you a fucking favor bringing you back. If I was so fucked, I can only imagine how horrible you must’ve been feeling. You’re lucky I came and save you. Saved us. And now, we can be happy again.” He explained.

“K-...Katsuki-..p-please!” You forced out, trying to beg for air.

“SHUT UP! I saved you, Y/N. So don’t even try to mention the little accident that happened so long ago, baby. Now you can forgive me. And don’t worry..I’m ready to listen to all the apologies you surely have for me...even if I have to choke them out of you.” He seethed with his hand tightening. Your eyes began to pop as the blood flow began to fill your face. Your eyes turned red as you struggled for air.

“I-...I-I’m..K-Katsuki! ...I’m sorry!” You shouted as best as you could. Luckily for you, the second you did, Bakugou’s hand lost its grip and simply rested on your neck. You choked and coughed as you relished in the sweet taste of oxygen. He smiled and leaned down to give your lips a sweet peck to shut you up and tapped your cheek before he walked to the door. Before leaving, he turned around to look at you and give you your official welcome back.

“I’m glad you’re home, baby. Can’t believe you really tried leaving. You’re mine, Y/N. And you always will be....don’t forget it.”

He slammed the door shut, walking away from the room with a smile. And you?

You cried.

A/N: Back by popular demand, we have part 2 to “What Have I Done.” How was it? In my opinion the beginning SUCKED! But I promise it’ll get better! The story will focus on Y/N and Bakugou’s new lives now so stay tuned and I hope you guys enjoyed it!

Tag list: @captainchrisstan @jazzylove @bakugous-trauma @konohahoee @whatdidshesayyy @chibiiichann @lover-of-helios @unicornlover25 @tamakisropebunny @iliketobullydeku @peacchfuz @fairybnha3 @ebiharachan @levimeko @5sos-wdw @naluciosa @anime-weeb-bnha @bakucumsackslut @asteria-obey-me

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lifeisntafantasy · 4 years

Text

From this post because I like it and I wanna write Roman angst cuz I don't do that very much. Also their prompts are super cool.

@transformationloveb

(Also yes I know it doesn't say he's having his first panic attack, but that's what I want to write.)

You failed, Roman. You failed Thomas. They agreed with the snake over you. You're no better than your brother. You laughed at Janus's name. Thomas doesn't believe in you anymore. You failed. You're an awful prince. You're just as bad as your brother, like Janus said.

As Roman sunk out, these were the thoughts that flooded his head, making it hard to breathe. As Roman rose up in his room he all but collapsed on the floor. He couldn't breathe. What was happening? Was he dying? It isn't like the other sides and Thomas would care if he did, but still. Why couldn't he breathe? It was such an easy thing to do, but he just couldn't.

Roman tried to take a deep breath, but his lungs just wouldn't accept the air. He just couldn't breathe, and every time he failed it made everything worse.

Just breathe, Roman. It's the easiest thing ever. You do it every fucking day. Just take a breath. Are you that dumb that you don't know how to breathe?

Roman started crying, which didn't make breathing any easier. He felt so stupid. Why couldn't he just take a breath?

He didn't know how long he sat there, crying and struggling to breathe, but soon he started to feel light headed. He wanted to get up, but his limbs were shaking and felt like jelly.

Roman sat on the floor in the middle of his room for a little while longer after he heard the door click open. It was louder than he remembered and it made him flinch.

This is just great he thought. It's probably Patton coming here to tell you how disappointed he is in you, how dramatic you were being. He's going to tell you how selfish you were being, and how rude you were. He's going to reprimand you for lashing out like a child, that you should've been kinder and acted like a prince.

This only made Roman's breathing problem even worse.

"Princey? Roman? Are you okay?" It wasn't Patton. It was Virgil. "Roman, open your eyes. Look at me."

Roman opened his eyes, when had he closed them? He looked at Virgil, who's eyes were filled with worry. Roman tried to speak, but no noise would come out, other than gasping breaths.

"Roman, you're having a panic attack. Have you ever had a panic attack before?" Virgil's voice was calm and soothing, making it easier for Roman to calm down slightly and respond with a slight shake of his head.

"Okay, I'm going to lead you through a breathing exercise to help you calm down. Don't worry if you mess up a couple times, you'll be okay. Can I hold your hand?" Virgil spoke as softly as he could. He knew loud noises wouldn't help the panic Roman was feeling, whatever it was about. He would ask after Roman was calmed down again.

Roman nodded and Virgil grabbed his hand and rubbed it in a comforting pattern as he spoke up again.

"Okay, copy after me. Breathe in for four seconds," Virgil took a breath to show Roman, and Roman copied. "Now hold for seven seconds," Virgil held his breath, and Roman tried to copy, but let out a sob. "That's okay, Princey. You got this. Let's retry."

Virgil and Roman took another breath and held it, successfully this time. It took a couple minutes, but Roman could finally breathe normally.

Roman wiped his eyes on the sleeves of his shirt and spoke in a tired voice, "Thank you, Virge. But how did you know to come in here?"

"It's no problem. And uh... I don't really know? I just.. had a feeling that I needed to come in here?" Virgil shrugged.

"Okay. But thank you," Roman nodded.

"Again, it's no problem. But, if you don't mind me asking, what made you have a panic attack?" Virgil asked.

"Oh.." Roman mumbled, moving his gaze to the floor in front of him. "I um.. I failed Thomas, and now he probably hates me, which makes sense, and I laughed at Janus's name after he told us and now Patton is probably mad at me and everything is going down hill," Roman rambled as he started crying again.

"Woah woah woah, Ro, calm down. You'll be okay. Thomas could never hate you. They might be upset, but no one could ever hate you," Virgil said softly.

Roman took a deep breath and tried to wipe his tears, but he couldn't stop crying.

"Hey uh would you like a hug..? I know I'm not Patton, but-" Virgil was cut off by Roman leaning over and wrapping his arms around Virgil.

Virgil hugged him back and let him cry.

"You'll be okay, Princey. Everything's going to be okay. You can apologize later, and everything will turn out fine. It's okay." Virgil rubbed Roman's back as he cried into his shoulder.

Roman sniffled and spoke again, his words muffled by Virgil's hoodie, "Are you sure everything's gonna be okay?"

"Of course, Princey. Would you like me to stay and we can watch some movies until you calm down? Or I can leave and you can calm down yourself if you would like?" Virgil suggested.

Roman pulled away from the hug, wiping his face.

"Stay..? Please? Just for now at least, you can leave when-" Roman stopped talking when Virgil put his hand on his shoulder.

"I'll stay. What do you wanna watch?" Virgil smiled slightly.

So, for the rest of the night, Virgil and Roman binge watched Disney movies, putting off all their worries for the moment at least.

Whoo that was trash. Like literal trash. Buttttt I wanted Roman to be comforted in this one- and of course I had to make the one comforting him Virgil cuz why not lol. But here you go.

#tw panic attack #roman sanders #virgil sanders #character thomas #patton sanders #janus sanders #roman sanders angst

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bcdrawsandwrites · 6 years

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Next entry for @badthingshappenbingo!

Reminder that I am still accepting prompts for this! Check out my initial post for the guidelines. Also note the current bingo card on this post–the things I mark with crossbones are completed prompts, and ones with a single bone are ones that have been requested, but not written yet.

(Fics are also posted to AO3 and FFN, but please just use the links in my blog desc to get to those ‘cuz I’m too tired to make links for them.)

Aaand here’s our next prompt, submitted by an anon over on AO3. I didn’t want to take anon requests for this one, but I made an exception for this particular request.

WARNING!! THIS CHAPTER IS BRUTAL. Like, way way way way WAY more brutal than any of the others. It’s also technically a “bonus chapter” for my longfic, Neither Can You. It takes place directly after chapter 3, so you may want to skim that to get an idea of what’s going on here.

That said... here we go. Sorry in advance.

Prompt: Cold-Blooded Torture Characters: Héctor, Ernesto

The room was dark, and that was the least alarming thing about it. The meager light from outside shone through a dusty window and the open door, and that was enough to make Ernesto's shimmering white bones stand starkly out from the darkness. While his focus was trained on the man, Héctor was vaguely aware of the other crates and boxes that littered the room—some long-forgotten apartment that had been haphazardly converted into a storage unit, then forgotten again…

I have to get out of here.

That was the only coherent thought running through Héctor’s head—the only thought that was managing to push its way past the intense agony in his right hand. Said right hand, he knew, was currently in various pieces in a metal box sitting somewhere in the dark room. Somewhere behind Ernesto’s two bodyguards that were looming over him—they hadn’t moved yet, and he wasn’t sure when they would. He was too scared to find out.

Need to get out of here, maybe with the hand, maybe not, need to get out.

He did, he knew he did, but he wasn’t sure he could manage it. Part of him felt like if he tried to move, he would only make the pain worse, and he was so tired, he could just lose consciousness to get away from the pain—

Don’t fall asleep, don’t, it’s not safe, not safe, wake up, get up.

Biting his lip, Héctor pulled up his legs, digging his heels into the floor and pushing himself back. He pulled his arms back to press his palms into the floorboards so he could push himself upright—

His missing bones responded to the subconscious command, clattering against the metal box they were held in, and Héctor shrieked, falling hard against the floor.

“Don’t hurt yourself, hermanito,” growled a voice from the other side of the room, and Héctor clenched his jaw in anger. “After all, we’re not done here.”

“What?” Suddenly feeling much more awake, he looked back at the two men standing over him. In the dim light from the window on the other side of the room, he could see metal objects glinting in their hands. He still couldn’t tell what they were, and he wasn’t really keen on finding out.

“Ernesto, th-this is crazy,” he stammered, focusing on moving his left arm while keeping his right arm still. He managed to push himself upright this time, and fought to get back on his feet, only to fall at the sudden pain in his left leg—he must’ve injured it again in the struggle earlier.

“If you want to stop now, Héctor,” Ernesto began, and Héctor could barely make out the shine of his unnaturally white bones gleaming somewhere behind the bodyguards, “I can still call for your daughter to take your place instead.”

Héctor’s chest filled with ice. “Y-you can’t,” he choked. “You already called off—”

“I can get her back.”

“You’re bluffing!” he snarled, even as he felt his bones begin to tremble.

“Am I?” Ernesto tapped his phalanges against the metal box and exchanged glances with one of the guards, who pulled a radio out of his coat. “I suppose if you’re willing to make that gamble—”

“No, no!” His every instinct was screaming at him to run anyway, to take the risk that Ernesto might not be bluffing, but something far greater than that was telling him to stay, that he couldn’t risk her, he couldn’t risk something happening to the one person he’d been fighting for years and years and years just to have a chance of seeing her again. Whatever was going to happen would just have to happen; if her safety was at risk, then there was no alternative.

“So are you willing to stay with us for a little longer, old friend?”

Héctor’s eyes flicked to the guards, then back to Ernesto. “I-if I do,” he said, fighting against the heavy weight of dread in his chest, “will you leave her alone?”

“Of course.” Ernesto smiled. “So long as you’re cooperative, there’s no need to get her involved.”

Héctor tried to study his former friend’s face in the dark, and was struck with a new horror—he had no idea if Ernesto was telling the truth. For all he knew, he could have his guards attack him, and then still go after… Shuddering, he looked away, trying to think it through. If Ernesto was lying, what could he do? If he could get away, maybe he could try to make it to Coco before whatever sick person Ernesto had hired got to her, but he had no idea where Coco’s scheduled shoe delivery had been. He knew that she was going by herself, and he’d never thought to ask for the address. If luck was on his side, maybe the address was close by, but he had no way of knowing.

The Land of the Dead was vast, and for all he knew, Coco could be on the opposite side of it.

Terrified tears sprang to his eyes as he faced Ernesto again. “Promise me you won’t hurt her.”

“If you stay, then, yes, I promise no harm will come to her.”

Please, please don’t be lying, he thought, and shut his eyes. “S-sí. I’ll stay.”

“I thought so.”

Everything went quiet, other than the quiet shifting of the guards where they stood, the occasional creak of the old building, and the trembling of Héctor’s bones. After a short eternity, one quiet noise sounded above the others:

Knuckles rapping against wood.

The floorboards creaked as one of the two bodyguards stepped forward, and Héctor finally opened his eyes. Before he could respond, one of them moved to his side, grasping his shoulders, shoving him down into the floor, and holding him there. Automatically Héctor tried to push the man away, but again his broken hand tried to respond to the action, and he cried out in pain.

Part of him expected some smart remark from Ernesto, but when he looked back at where the man had been standing, he instead found Ernesto farther away, his back to him. But before he could think on that any further, he saw the other bodyguard slip into the side room, and quickly return with an electric lantern, which he set atop a nearby crate and switched on.

Héctor blinked and squinted in the sudden brightness, his breathing picking up as his vision took a moment to adjust. Dust floated in the flickering, humming light, and the frame of the man cast a looming shadow over Héctor. Of course those stupid guards with their stupid sunglasses hadn’t been bothered by the light.

The man who had retrieved the lantern knelt next to him, and Héctor felt the guard’s hand against his middle, pinning his spine the the floor. To his confusion, the guard proceeded to tug at either side of Héctor’s vest, exposing more of his rib cage. He then brandished the object he’d been holding earlier:

A hammer.

A flurry of panic overcame him as his chest began to heave in short, sharp breaths. “No, no, no no no—!”

In one swift movement the hammer came down, connecting with two of Héctor’s ribs. In spite of the pain, he couldn’t yell—the blow had winded him, leaving him to give out only a choked, hollow gasp. Again he tried to push away, managing to keep his bad arm still while his good arm flailed, striking at the man as much as he was able and trying feebly to grab the hammer away. In response, the man that was behind him shifted his grip from his shoulders to his upper arms, making it impossible for him to reach out. Even so he pounded his fist on the floorboards, kicking his feet and digging his heels into the hardwood.

His rib cage heaved, and he felt the pain of two bruised ribs on the right side of his chest. It could be worse, he tried to think, knowing full well it didn’t matter. But he had broken his ribs before—the one was still broken, the other missing—and he knew what they felt like. He’d gone through broken ribs before—he could handle bruised ribs. He could. He had to. He would heal, it wasn’t really that painful compared to—

Clang.

The hammer struck at a higher rib on his left side, and he felt the crack—it wasn’t all the way through, it wasn’t broken, it was just cracked, it hurt but it was just cracked, it would heal, it would heal, dios, why was this happening…

Against his will, his mind supplied an answer in the flash of a vivid mental image: Coco held down by a man as another approached her with a hammer—

With sudden sob, Héctor shook his head against the image. Please, please, no, you can’t do that to her, I stayed, I’m still here…!

Clang.

He gave a choked cry as the hammer slammed into the other side of his ribs—he didn’t want to be here, he didn’t want this, he knew he had to be here but he wanted out, he wanted to be back home, he should’ve been home ages ago, why did he have to leave so late, he didn’t want to be here with Ernesto and these horrible men and that hammer, and… and…

That wasn’t what hammers were for. They weren’t supposed to be used like this—they used them to fix houses in Shantytown. He could remember using one himself as he helped Carla repair her roof for the third time, joking about how her shanty was very insistent about always having a hole in its roof. They used them to repair the boardwalks, like the one that broke as he was walking across it—

Clang—crrk!

It hurt it hurt it hurt, his chest was heaving but it hurt to breathe, he could feel the cracks and bruises that the hammer had made—that wasn’t what they were for, he would watch Imelda and the others at the workshop using them to make shoes, he saw Imelda making his shoes though he didn’t know they were for him at the time, and then later she surprised him with the shoes as a gift, because she said if he lived there, he had to wear shoes—

Clang.

Where—where were they? Imelda? Coco? What time was it? Did they know he was gone? Did they miss him? Imelda would surely notice that he was late coming home. She would get angry at him, but would she come after him? But he didn’t want her here, he didn’t want her in danger for his sake, this was his fault in the first place… If she went after anyone, maybe she would go after Coco to make sure she was all right? Please, Imelda, make sure she’s okay, go after her—I’ll get out of this, but make sure she’s okay—

Clang—crack.

Héctor screamed, struggling to grab at his ribs, only to yelp again as his phalanges brushed against a jagged, broken bone. They’d broken a rib—one of his upper ribs, and it was agony to breathe. He tried to make himself stop—he was already dead so he didn’t need to breathe, he didn’t have to. He could just keep his rib cage still and it wouldn’t hurt so much. Holding his metaphorical breath, he screwed up his face, trying to force himself to stay still, stay still, stay still, it’s going to hurt more if you move—

Clang—CRUNCH.

White-hot pain lanced through his rib cage, blinding him to everything but the sensation of another one of his uppermost ribs cracking through—a jagged crack that was agony every time the two ends rubbed against each other every time he breathed—he wanted to stop but his breaths came in heavy, shaking sobs—

Clang!

“STOP!” he screamed through the pain in his chest, bucking against the restraints of both of the guards and actually managing to throw one of them off. The guard’s hand left his middle, while the other pressed down on his arms to keep him pinned to the ground. “¡BASTA! LET ME GO!”

“All right, enough, enough!”

To Héctor’s shock, the man who had been using the hammer stood up, looking at something on the other side of the room. Following his gaze, he found Ernesto was facing them again and looking… hunched over, one hand gripping a crate next to him—stressed? Upset? It didn’t matter—that torturer had stopped his assault, finally, so maybe this nightmare was over. Part of him almost wanted to say something, but talking would hurt. Instead he looked Ernesto in the eye, trying to discern what was to happen next—was this over? Come to think of it, he didn’t even know what Ernesto’s purpose in doing this was—something about… about his music?

Ernesto stared back, too far away for Héctor to be able to read his expression, and didn’t answer.

In spite of the pain, Héctor felt a flurry of panic return at the thought of something more horrifying to him than the thought of more broken ribs or fingers or hands—the thought of someone else in the same fate as him. “C-Coco,” he stammered, fighting to talk through the pain, trying to sit up, but the other tormentor held him firm. “Coco, sh-she’s still safe, isn’t she?”

Ernesto remained silent, and Héctor’s panic grew.

“‘Nesto?” he cried, eyes widening when he saw his former best friend turn away again. “Ernesto, is Coco—”

Ernesto looked away, and rapped his knuckles against the crate beside him.

The man behind him let go of his arms, and Héctor wasted no time in attempting to scramble to his feet. But the men wouldn’t allow it—the one who had assaulted him with the hammer shoved him back to the ground, one hand on Héctor’s shoulder and another on his sternum, and Héctor yelped. “NO!” he cried out again, kicking out with this legs and trying to push the man off of him. “L-let me go, basta! Let go—”

The pressure on his sternum increased, and he drew in a sharp intake of air that froze inside his chest. “Quit squirming,” the man growled, “unless you want another rib broken.”

Forcing himself to remain still, he glared at the man who held him down, only for his attention to be drawn to the other man at the sound of something metal clinking lightly against his hands. It wasn’t as large or heavy as the hammer, but whatever it was couldn’t mean anything good. Héctor felt a fresh wave of panic surge through his broken rib cage, not even knowing what they were planning this time. “N-no, no, not again, not—”

The man that was holding him down kept one hand on his shoulder, then grabbed underneath his jaw, jerking it back and knocking his skull against the floor. The impact dazed him, but the man didn’t remove his hand, keeping Héctor’s head wrenched back.

From this angle he could barely see the other man, which did nothing to soothe his frayed nerves. The man kneeled down next to him, holding out a long, thin metal object that glinted in the dim light of the abandoned building. Only a second later did Héctor realize what the object was, and he drew in a sharp, terrified gasp just as the blade scraped against his throat.

His cry was immediately choked and strained, his entire body squirming against the sensation. He tried to push the guard away again, but couldn’t. “S-stop…” he rasped, and immediately regretted it, his voice tearing into the cut in his bone.

Either they didn’t hear him or didn’t care, because again the blade came down, this time, striking up vertically across three vertebrae. Héctor gagged, eyes bulging as his kicking and squirming grew more erratic, but none of this helped—he only felt another hand at his other shoulder, pinning him down further, the guard leaning in closer. The only thing his brain was registering anymore was the need to get away from these men, all better judgment failing him as he tried to protest: “St… st…”

The knife sliced the sides of his neck three times in succession, back and forth, resulting in a rattling, rasping cry. The panic continued to build in his chest, and he felt like he couldn’t breathe, like he was going to suffocate—he couldn’t move his broken rib cage, and though he’d long since left behind his lungs that needed air and his heart that pumped blood, he swore he felt blood filling his throat, pooling down into his lungs, he was drowning, choking—

Slowly the blade began to dig into the middle of his throat, digging into the bones, and he gagged, trying to will himself to breathe. He was going to choke to death. Why was this happening, why was this…

“St—kkkkkhhhh—st—”

“Hm?” came a voice that was closer than before. Had Héctor been able to focus more, he might have noticed that the voice wasn’t quite as calm as its owner would have liked. “Speak up, Héctor.”

He tried, he tried, his voice fighting around the blade in his throat. “D-de—ggghhkkk—ja…” Deja de...

“You want them to stop?”

“S—gghhhh…!”

“That… could be arranged. I believe we can still reach your daughter if—”

“NO!”

The knife jabbed deeper into his vertebrae at the sudden shout, and he gagged again and again, certain he was going to die again, somehow. He was going to suffocate, but it can’t happen to her. You have to let them do this to you. It can’t happen to Coco, it can’t…

“Stop, stop, move it away,” Ernesto demanded as he hurried closer, a frantic edge to his tone.

There was a brief pulling sensation at his throat, and distantly he realized the knife was stuck. With a sudden yank it was out, leaving Héctor gagging and rasping, his chest heaving in short, uneven gasps and trying to reach up to claw at his ruined vertebrae, but his arm was still being held down.

Ernesto was standing over him, his expression unreadable, his eyes not quite focused on him. “Say something.”

Somewhere beyond all the pain, Héctor still felt a twinge of anger in his gut. Was he joking? What kind of sick joke was that? But the anger was short-lived, the exhaustion in his bones and the agony in his throat and chest and hand quickly overwhelming it.

Something nudged into the side of his chest, jarring his broken ribs and making him breathe in a sharp hiss of air that stung at his throat. “Say something,” Ernesto repeated, his voice a low growl.

Héctor was not usually one for strong language, but a few choice words tried to force their way out of his ruined throat. Instead, all that came out were pained gags and wracking coughs that shredded through his broken bones.

For only a brief moment Ernesto regarded him before stepping back, looking away. “Let him go,” he said, tugging on his coat and walking up to one of the old crates nearby. “We’re done here.”

And the hands that had held him down were gone, weights lifted from his shoulders and spine. Automatically and in spite of the pain it caused, Héctor turned to his side and curled up on himself, yanking his vest back over his exposed ribs, tucking his right wrist under his vest, and pressing his forehead to his knees, trying to hide as many of his injuries as he could. While Ernesto was talking with his torturers in hushed tones, Héctor found himself caught in the struggle of wanting desperately to breathe, but at the same time, not wanting to breathe at all in order to avoid any more pain. He had to get out of there, he knew, but right now he could barely will himself to move, let alone crawl out of this awful building, and—

Suddenly remembering just why he had been forced to stay in the first place, he frantically looked up, eyes wide. “C—” he choked, only for his voice to degenerate into ragged coughing. “C—Co—”

A pair of hands hooked under his arms and hoisted him up, and he screamed voicelessly, cringing at the sharp pain in his throat. No, no, no, he said they were done! Frantically he struggled against the men’s grips, kicking with his legs and trying to pull away. He felt something clap onto his head, and belatedly realized one of them had shoved his hat back on—it must have come off at some point during the struggle.

“Take him out,” Ernesto commanded, and the men began to drag Héctor out of the dusty room.

Héctor fought to kick out his legs again, but his strength left him, leaving his heels to drag on the floor. Still he tried to reach out, staring at Ernesto desperately. “C—c…” Coco, is she okay, please tell me you kept your word, please…!

“Wait.”

The men stopped, and he felt a sickening mixture of terror and hope flickering in his chest. Please, please tell me, tell me she—

“Héctor,” Ernesto began, picking up a metal box and taking a few stiff strides closer to him. “Are you listening to me?”

I don’t have much of a choice, do I? Héctor thought bitterly from where he hung between the two guards. He lifted his head slightly and glared as much as he was able, not sure if his expression could clearly be seen in the dark and not really sure if he cared anymore. The bitterness left him as quickly as it came, with worry taking its place. Please tell me, Ernesto, please…

Whether Ernesto could read his expression or not, he looked him over for a few moments. At one point his eyes fell on Héctor’s rib cage and he quickly looked away, giving a barely-suppressed shudder. “I didn’t want to do this,” he muttered lowly, and Héctor stiffened. “You gave me little choice.”

Rage bubbled up within his broken rib cage, briefly giving him the strength to tug against the men, but they yanked him back, and it was gone.

“There’s no need for that,” Ernesto went on, taking a half-step back. “We’re done here. But… if you like, you’re free to talk about this, of course.”

You made me so I can’t, Héctor fumed, but the anger was only draining him now, rather than giving him any kind of energy. Please, just tell me my Coco is—

Ernesto causally rattled the box he held, and Héctor gave a voiceless cry as a dozen jumbled sensations of pain shot through his hand. Waiting for Héctor’s frantic, short breaths to slow, Ernesto rubbed a hand against his own throat before continuing: “I want nothing more to do with you. But your family… they still hold a great interest to me.”

Héctor froze, a tremor running through his bones. No, no…!

“If you decide that the media or police should know about this…” Ernesto glanced to the side, seeming to consider something for a moment before smirking back at Héctor. “…perhaps I’ll have to see about getting a new pair of shoes for the interview, hm?”

No, no, no, you can’t…!

“I have faith in you, hermanito,” he said, turning away. “I’m sure you’ll only say what you think is right.” With one last glance over his shoulder, he snapped his fingers, and the men began to move once more.

Wait, wait, no! Héctor tried to fight against them, but his exhausted limbs refused to cooperate. Ernesto! Tell me she’s okay! ¡Por favor!

But Ernesto said nothing more, and the two men dragged him out into the trash-filled alley where this entire mess had started. Unceremoniously they dropped him to the ground, and he fell on his right side, catching himself on his bad arm. As a mute cry attempted to force its way out of his throat, the men swiftly stepped back into the building, tossing something else out beside him before slamming the door shut.

Héctor found himself alone among the trash, and feeling much like it himself.

For a long while he lay there on the ground, not feeling in any state to move or even think. From where he lay just outside the doorway, as his eyes adjusted to the dark he could barely see the junk that had been piled up, and he found himself staring blankly at it. It didn’t feel real, he realized—everything that had happened to him. Everything felt hazy and strange, like a nightmare, like none of it had really happened. Here he was, so close to where he’d tripped and fallen—could he have simply knocked himself out on something and awoken here again?

After considering it for a moment, he tried to push himself upright, only for the end of his right arm to scrape against the dirty cobblestone. The pain caused him to cry out, the sound barely coming out as a squeak that immediately degenerated into a choking and coughing fit. He tried to stop himself and just breathe, but the attempt only left his rib cage in agony.

It was all real—he had the injuries to prove it. But if it was real, that meant…

Coco…! he thought desperately, and struggled to push himself up on his good arm. His frame shook with the effort, but still he tried to get back upon to his feet. His leg ached, though the pain seemed trivial compared to every other part of him that hurt. But even as he pushed himself upright, he found that was about all he had the strength to do, as he had to lean back against the wall of the building.

But Coco… he still didn’t know if she was all right—unsure if Ernesto really had kept his word or if he would come home to find her in the same awful state as him, if he found her at all… or if he ever went home at all. How was he supposed to get home in the first place? How could he?

His thoughts immediately went to Imelda, surely furious at him for coming home so late, for making them worry. And now here he was, actually giving them a reason to worry. Then she’d ask what had happened and he… what could he even tell her?

“If you decide that the media or police should know about this, perhaps I’ll have to see about getting a new pair of shoes for the interview, hm?”

Coco…

He didn’t know where she was, or where the shoe delivery had been to. How was he supposed to find out if she was all right? He couldn’t walk, he couldn’t move, he couldn’t even tell her he was sorry—

It wasn’t until he felt the pain from his chest heaving in quick, uneven gasps that he realized he was crying. It hurt his ribs, it hurt his throat, but he couldn’t stop, finding himself sliding down the wall and back to the ground, curling up on himself once again. I’m sorry I got you into this, I’m sorry I let this happen, I’m sorry… he thought, wishing he could say the words to his daughter, but he couldn’t even speak. Ernesto… His mouth twisted. If you did anything to her, I’ll…!

Wait—but that was it, wasn’t it? Ernesto had asked him to stay quiet, or he would go after his family. If he already went after Héctor’s family, what would stop Héctor from immediately going to the police?

Ernesto surely wouldn’t be so stupid… which meant that Coco should still be all right. Dios, he hoped so. He wasn’t sure what else he had left to hope in.

Part of him wondered if his family would come looking for him—Imelda might or might not, but she’d be angry either way. Coco might come looking, if she was all right, but he didn’t want that—he didn’t want her anywhere near this terrible place. He didn’t want Imelda here either, come to think of it—for them to see him in this state…

Perhaps he could get back to Shantytown? No one would ask too many questions there, and he could hide there until he got better, until he was ready to face his family again. He still remembered when he’d limped and crawled his way there after breaking his leg, and Cheech and the others had taken care of him until he could walk again, but… all of them, even Cheech, were long gone now. But maybe if he could…

Slowly drawing in as deep of a breath as he could, he tried to rise to his feet, leaning against the wall behind him, but his legs wouldn’t cooperate. Not knowing what else to do, he rested his head on his knees again, shutting his eyes and hoping again that he would wake up from this nightmare.

Héctor wasn’t sure how much time had passed when he felt something nearby—the prickling feeling on the back of his neck, like he was being watched. Shuddering, he lifted his head and looked down the alley, out toward the street—

A pair of enormous yellow eyes gazed back at him, as something monstrous drew in a deep breath through its nose. Through his exhausted haze, he could make out the glow of yellow and green markings—

The alebrije let out an explosive snarl, frantically reaching her enormous paws out to Héctor, not coming nearly close enough, and raking her claws against the side of the building in frustration. With a choked cry he tried to get away, his terror granting him the strength to scramble closer to the door he’d been thrown out of. The alebrije stood there, growling, before darting off and out of sight.

Héctor couldn’t breathe. That… that had been Imelda’s alebrije, Pepita. She’d sounded furious, and… if she was here, then Imelda couldn’t be far behind, and was likely just as angry.

Part of him was relieved that help was coming, but still he felt his heart gripped with fear. What could he tell her?

For a long while he sat there, trying to breathe in shallow breaths as he thought it through, but no solution came to mind. He felt trapped—he couldn’t get away or hide, he couldn’t tell her anything even if he needed to, and… and…

Then he heard it—the faint sound of voices nearby, though too far away and too quiet for him to identify. People were coming—whether it was Imelda, or Ernesto’s men coming back for more, he wasn’t sure, but he couldn’t stay here.

Biting his lip and summoning what little strength he had, Héctor pushed himself back up on his feet, leaning heavily against the wall, and then carefully eased along it until he was standing right against the door frame. He pressed himself as close to the wall as possible, hoping the shadows would hide him. He wasn’t sure what good hiding would do at this point, but his only other option was letting someone see him like this, and—

An earsplitting yowl echoed down the alley, and he gave a silent yelp, tucking his bad arm under his vest and keeping his other arm wrapped defensively around his chest.

“Héctor? ¿Estás ahí?”

Imelda. So she had come back to find him. Part of him wanted to wilt, but he kept himself firmly pressed against the wall, and kept quiet. As he listened to her footsteps gradually grow closer, he shut his eyes, afraid of potentially meeting her gaze.

The sound of her boots against the cobblestone grew louder for a moment, then softer; she’d passed by him.

“Pepita! Are you sure this is the right place?”

The alebrije gave another terrible yowl in response, her claws digging into one of the buildings. Thankfully she couldn’t fit into the alleyway, or she would’ve pounced on him by now. On top of that, Imelda was still overlooking him—he could hear her rifling through the garbage. Maybe she would leave. Is that what he wanted?

Yet Pepita was still yowling, scratching more frantically. Go away, alebrije, Héctor thought, shuddering. Please…

He thought he heard Imelda say something else, but he wasn’t sure what—Pepita was making too much noise for him to tell. Was she coming closer? Pressing himself further against the wall, he risked opening his eyes and—

Imelda was only a few feet from where he stood, and she immediately brandished her shoe. With another silent yelp, he tugged his hat over his face, cringing. No, no, no…

It was a short eternity before she spoke. “Hector? What in the world are you doing?!”

Of course she was furious. She had every right to be, and even if he could speak, there wasn’t anything he could think to say, except… “S… s…” The sound refused to properly come out of his wrecked throat, his chest heaving with the effort.

“We’ve been looking everywhere for you! What did you think you were doing, worrying us all to final death?!” she went on, and he felt his stomach twist in guilt. “What were you doing, hiding from us all this time? Are you listening to me?”

“S… s…” Sorry, I’m sorry, I didn’t want to worry anyone, I didn’t mean for this to happen. Please tell me Coco is all right…

Distantly he could hear Pepita continuing to yowl, but the alebrije’s voice paled in comparison to the anger in Imelda’s.

Said anger, however, faded as Imelda spoke up again, her voice uncharacteristically quiet: “…Héctor?”

He felt her hand against his, and flinched, but there was nothing else he could do other than let her guide his hand upward, lifting his hat away from his face.

And Héctor gave the most apologetic smile he could muster, trying one last time to force the words out of his throat:

“S… sorr…”

#hector rivera #ernesto de la cruz #imelda rivera #coco #pixar coco #coco spoilers #pepita #my writing #fanfic #neither can you #no seriously I am ... really sorry for this one #NEXT ONE WILL BE LIGHTHEARTED I PROMISE

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monthofsick · 6 years

Text

Stomach Bugs Have the Worst Timing: Day 24

Warning(s): mentions of vomit

You have been warned!

Just one more day.

Jax looked at himself in the vanity mirror, the ring lights around the frame dimmed enough to where he didn’t have to squint so much; however the lights only served to make his complexion look simultaneously paler and more flushed. He was pretty sure he was running a fever, if the chills running up his spine despite his heavy dress coat were any indication, and he suspected it had risen a little in the past hours.

He closed his eyes and sank back down in his chair, using the vanity to brace himself on the way down.

It’s the last night of the play, he thought to himself. Just another hour or two and you’re free to go.

Sure, Jax could’ve taken the day off and let his understudy take over, but as far as he was concerned the guy couldn’t recite his lines to save his life. Besides, the costume they had for the villain was far too small to fit Andrew—they only had the one fit for Jax, who was barely five feet tall.

Jax leaned forward and held his head in his hands, his eyes still closed. He felt too sick to be preparing for another showing, if he was being honest. The heat radiating off him was being trapped inside the thick material of his costume, and it wasn’t doing his queasy stomach any favors and only made him more aware of the shivers he’d have to hold back to keep his voice for the smooth-talking antagonist steady.

At this point Jax had been a little too distracted in not falling asleep that he nearly jumped out of his skin when he heard a bag being dropped onto the vanity. He jumped a little and looked up to see Brooklyn, a junior in charge of makeup, staring down at him, her forest green eyes and magenta necklace shining in the ring lights.

“Is it already time?” Jax asked dazedly.

“No, but we have about twenty minutes to do makeup and fix final props,” Brooklyn replied as she opened and began digging through her bag. “We don’t need a repeat of Monday’s show, do we?”

Jax snorted as he recalled the “technical difficulties” of opening night. Apparently, the girl playing the maid misplaced the doll used as the baby and they’d wound up using a ball of yarn wrapped in a sweater only to later discover the doll had been softly “crying” in the fireplace for the first two scenes.

“That’s because Amanda would lose her head if it wasn’t attached to her neck,” Jax muttered. He looked up to see Brooklyn practically staring at his face, her brows pinched together. “What?”

“You look really pale,” Brooklyn said, but it sounded more like she was telling herself. “Do you feel alright?”

Jax blinked. “Not really, but I should be fine for tonight,” he said. Brooklyn didn’t seem to believe him. Jax didn’t blame her—he didn’t quite believe himself either.

“Are you sure?” Brooklyn asked. “You’re sitting down and yet you still look like you’re about to faint.”

“I’ll—“ Jax pressed a fist to his lips to stifle an unexpected burp. “I’ll be fine,” he said shakily.

“You’re gonna throw up on stage if you feel as sick as you look, Redwood,” Brooklyn said sternly, her arms crossed. Despite her green eyes, dark skin, and vibrant purple hair, Brooklyn’s firmness always reminded Jax of his adoptive mother. His heart clenched at the sudden feeling of homesickness.

“I’ll be fine,” Jax repeated.

Brooklyn rolled her eyes and opened her makeup bag again. “D’you want full face or just the ridiculous mustache?”

“Jus’ do full face. ‘S the last night, I guess.”

She hummed in acknowledgement and pulled out the foundation shade and brush she used for Jax. Then she squeezed some product and applied it to Jax’s cheek. It felt cold against his heated skin, and he closed his eyes to let Brooklyn continue with the makeup.

“Wow, this looks dark on you today,” she muttered, spreading the foundation out more on the left side of his face. Brooklyn gently moved his face to the side with her fingertips, paused, then pressed the inside of her wrist to Jax’s neck.

“Oh my god, you’re burning up,” she said exasperatedly. “Do you want me to tell Andrew to fill in for you?”

“He probably doesn’t remember his lines anymore,” Jax replied. “I can make it til the end.”

Brooklyn still didn’t look convinced but didn’t argue. “It’s your funeral,” she said, then continued to fix Jax’s stage makeup.

By the time the play’s narrator had introduced the selection, Jax felt awful. His stomach kept him seated near the trashcan as he planned for the worst, and the stage director had been keeping a close eye on him as soon as he’d sat down with a hand on his midsection. He was just glad he had about twenty minutes and a set change before his character was introduced.

As soon as he stood up to go behind the door prop, he immediately regretted it. His head spun and his mouth flooded with sour liquid. He braced himself against the trashcan, spat out a mouthful of bile, and took a long, deep breath. He didn’t pay attention to the stage director swearing under her breath beside him and instead wiped his mouth and moved to his spot to be cued in.

He tripped as soon as he stepped through the door frame but brushed it off for comedic effect. When he was supposed to be monologuing he stumbled over some of his words and might’ve dragged on a little longer than he should’ve. Then when he jumped backwards after seeing the maid lying on the floor, he had to pause to avoid falling on his ass or leaving his stomach on the floor. All with the span of about two minutes.

He felt so grateful when he had to go backstage that his body nearly gave out and he almost sank to the floor beside the door frame. Since he had to be in the same spot the next time he went onstage, he would’ve stayed there had it not been for the fact that the only trash can was on stage right, and he didn’t want to possibly leave a puddle of sick on the center of the stage.

Needless to say, the next twenty minutes backstage and onstage resulted in Jax’s health taking a turn for the worst. He hadn’t brought up anything else since before his first scene, but when he had to put on the dress for the final scene he didn’t think he’d make it to the end of the play.

As he stood behind the door he kept one hand braced against the frame and the other gingerly holding his stomach. When he heard the doorbell sound effect he straightened up as much as he could and stepped through the door opened by the maid’s boss, ‘Ms. Rachelle’.

Suddenly speaking loudly, clearly, and with a falsetto became increasingly difficult. Every step he took was focused on not losing against his sloshing stomach in front of a crowd and not tripping over the skirt whose hemline was beginning to come undone.

Jax and Ms. Rachelle stopped in front of her mother’s chair, and his stomach lurched painfully. He was able to get out maybe five words before his stomach gurgled and he bent at the waist, bringing up a wave of vomit between the two actresses. Both girls carried on their next few lines as if nothing had happened, albeit a little louder than intended, as Jax sank to a crouch and brought up another mouthful of sick on the wooden floor.

He felt his eyes sting with unshed tears and registered a flurry of reactions—startled gasps and murmurs from the crowd; the stage director aggressively whispering “Curtains!” into her headpiece; and the actual sound of the curtains being drawn.

Jax squeezed his eyes shut and took a shuddering breath as tears flooded down his face. God, he really just threw up in front of hundreds of people, didn’t he? The sheer thought of it made his body shake and his stomach clench harder with each sob.

He gagged again and added to the puddle in front of him when he felt someone removing the scarf from around his neck. He opened his eyes to see Ms. Rachelle, now back to her old self of Avalon, with both the ridiculous sunglasses and scarf of his costume. She set them down beside herself before inching forward and brushing his bangs behind his ears.

“You’re boiling,” she said, though she didn’t seem very surprised. “Why didn’t you ask Andrew to fill in?”

Jax didn’t answer. He only shook his head and sobbed. Avalon pushed her robes aside and pulled Jax back to the spot where he’d resided between his scenes; if he was sick there at least the mess would end up in the trash can.

Just when Jax had been seated the stage manager pushed aside the side of the curtain and stepped forward so the crowd could see her.

“Uh, sorry for the inconvenience, but we’re experiencing some… issues at the moment. However if you would please just sit tight we’ll have everything sorted out soon. Feel free to use this time as an intermission of sorts before we can get ourselves back on schedule.”

She stepped backstage again but said nothing towards Jax. “Can someone call the janitor over? Cuz I really doubt one of you guys are gonna step up to the challenge.”

#tw vomit #Ace-writes #stomach bugs have the worst timing #day24 #nov. 24 2018 #novemetober #novemetober 2018 #submission

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osakaso5 · 6 years

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Tamaki Yotsuba 12 SONGS GIFT Rabbit Chat Part 3: Tell Us, All Stars! 1

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 4 | Part 5

Riku: Tamaki, happy birthday!!

Sogo: Happy birthday, Tamaki-kun. It's good that you stayed safe and healthy for a whole year. Let's keep doing our best together.

Momo: (* ’ U ^)ノ+。*∞ Happy Birth Day ∞*。+\(^ U ’ *)

Yamato: Tama, congrats.

Nagi: HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

Gaku: Happy birthday. I look forward to 12 SONGS GIFT, too.

Ryunosuke: Tamaki-kun, happy birthday!

Mitsuki: Tamaki, happy birthday!! Let's make you an extra huge King Pudding!

Iori: Yotsuba-san, happy birthday.

Tenn: Happy birthday, Tamaki Yotsuba.

Banri: Happy birthday, Tamaki-kun. We'll have your party after the 12 SONGS GIFT live.

Rinto: Thank you for the invitation. Happy birthday.

Kaoru: Happy birthday. Treasure that youth of yours.

Yuki: Tamaki-kun, congratulations.

Tamaki:

Tamaki: Thanks everyone!!

Yamato: You just had your screening, right? What kind of song did you pick?

Tamaki: "Four Leaf Ring", a really good song

Mitsuki: Great to hear!

Tamaki: Seriously, it's so good. Once it comes out for karaoke, Rikkun needs to sing it for Tenten and Yukirin needs to sing it for Ban-chan. And Nagicchi needs to be there, too.

Riku: I kinda get what kind of song it'll be now, but I think I'll be too busy crying to sing it.

Yuki: I'll probably start wailing, too.

Nagi: I will most likely sob very loudly, as well.

Tenn:

Banri:

Tamaki: Everyone, buy "Four Leaf Ring"!!!

Ryunosuke: Of course! Just you wait!

Momo: Do your best at the solo live, too! You'll make it a great concert for sure!

Tsumugi: Everyone, thank you for gathering here to celebrate Tamaki-san!

Tamaki: Thank you!!

Tsumugi: You'll get to celebrate your actual birthday with all of IDOLiSH7, but...

Choices/outcomes:

1. Is there anything you’d like to tell TRIGGER?

Tamaki: Thanks for celebrating me. Get along, you three. And don't make Ryu-aniki do all the cooking.

2. Is there anything you’d like to tell Re:vale?

Tamaki: Thanks for celebrating me. I'll lend you Ban-chan sometimes as thanks.

3. Is there anything you’d like to tell the managers?

Tamaki: Thanks for celebrating me. You guys should all go to karaoke with our manager sometime!

Tamaki: Thanks, everyone!!

Tamaki:

Tsumugi: Tamaki-san, now that it's your birthday, do you have any questions for everyone that you normally couldn't ask?

Tamaki: We're doing the thing we always do, right! I came up with a thing!

Iori: He took this so seriously that he neglected our lessons in favor of writing lists on his notes.

Tamaki: At first I tried to come up with a different question for all of you, but then I decided to ask all of you the same thing!

Sogo: You spent all our time together coming up with questions, too. What did you decide to ask?

Tamaki: What ranking do you all think I'd get the first place in!?

Gaku: What does that mean? You're not gonna ask how you rank among the people we like?

Tamaki: I'll be depressed if my ranking's anything but 1st! Think about this seriously, Gakkun!!!

Gaku: Is it that depressing?

Tenn: Ryu, tell Gaku that you like him the second most out of TRIGGER.

Ryunosuke: Gaku, I like you the second most out of TRIGGER!

Gaku: Yotsuba. My bad.

Tamaki: Do you get it now!?

Gaku: I get it. That hurt...

Ryunosuke: Don’t worry! I like both Tenn and you the most, Gaku!

Gaku: Thanks.

Yamato: I see. Tama wants us to tell him rankings he'd take the first place in. That's such a Tama thing to do (lol)

Tsumugi: Well then, let's get started! Anesagi-san, go ahead!

Kaoru: "No.1 King Pudding Lover".

Rinto: Anesagi-san, I was going to use that!

Gaku: So was I!

Yamato: I guess that one's all used up, huh!

Tamaki: You guys!!! Stop talking like King Pudding's the only thing I care about!!!

Kaoru: But you do like it, don't you?

Tamaki: I love it...

Kaoru: Since it's your birthday, I'll make it even better just this once. "No.1 Hunk Candidate and King Pudding Lover".

Tamaki: Yay! My ranking got longer!

Iori: So you prefer a long title...

Sogo: Why did you call him a candidate instead of just a hunk?

Kaoru: Sorry. My standards for what constitutes as a hunk are strict. I called him a candidate because I see potential in his future.

Kaoru: Keep eating King Pudding for a few more years and grow up handsome, okay. But remeber to eat your greens, too. Happy birthday.

Tsumugi: Thank you, Anesagi-san! Okazaki-san, you're next!

Rinto: Right...

Rinto: "No.1 Totally Unexpected Encounter!"

Momo: I totally get this one! I always run into Tamaki at the weirdest places, like other talents' waiting rooms, or the convenience store near the TV station!

Iori: I often find him at strange spots after school... I can understand loitering around the school canteen or the shoe racks, but I have no idea why he'd be at the incinerator or gym storehouse.

Tamaki: Yeah. It's 'cuz I'm busy

Nagi: Do you go to those sorts of places for a specific purpose?

Tamaki: Nope

Mitsuki: He's just following his instincts!

Tsumugi: Thank you for a unique ranking! Banri-san, go ahead!

Banri: Tamaki-kun is the "No.1 Guy Who Has Potential"!

Banri: He's still young, so I think his talents will grow even more in the future. When I'm with him, I can feel how much he's grown over time, and it makes me happy.

Tamaki: Thanks, Ban-chan!! I'm gonna get taller!

Tamaki: I'm sure I'll get taller!

Tamaki: I'll be bigger than Ryu-aniki!

Ryunosuke: I'd like to see you become bigger than me.

Mitsuki: Nobody's gonna be able to stop Tamaki if he gets that big...

Tenn: Not physically, anyway.

Tsumugi: Thank you, Banri-san! Yuki-san, go ahead!

Yuki: "No.1 Idle Talker."

Yuki: Everyone comes over to greet us or tell us their thoughts on our performances, but only Tamaki-kun will come up to tell us "I found a pillbug that doesn't curl into a ball even if you poke it"

Tamaki: I like that you listen to me till the end, Yukirin. And I like that you laugh at my stories a lot, too.

Sogo: I listen to you until the end, too.

Tamaki: You always interrupt me to ask if you should laugh

Sogo: That's because the last time I just listened to you silently, you told me that I should've laughed at the thing you said. I don’t want to get it wrong...

Yuki: You two are so hilarious ^^

Tsumugi: I see, that was a surprising ranking! Thank you, Yuki-san! Momo-san, you're next!

Momo: To me, Tamaki's the "Absolute No.1 Person I Envy for Being Able to Do Body Checks on Ban-san"!!!!

Banri: lol

Tamaki:

Tamaki: It's pretty great!!

Momo: I'm so jealous!!! When I saw you leaning on him the other day, I felt the seed of jealousy grow inside me... (´; ω ;`)

Banri: I don't mind if you do it too, Momo-kun.

Momo: I wouldn't dare!!! (@_@;)

Yuki: Tell me that I can do it, too.

Banri: You do it before you even get a permission.

Tsumugi:

Tamaki: Since you get jealous, I do it even more when you're around, Momorin.

Tsumugi: That's exactly the kind of ranking I'd expect from you, Momo-san! Next up is Tsunashi-san!

Tamaki: Wait a sec!

Tsumugi: What is it?

Tamaki: I feel like celebrating, so instead of cake, I'll eat King Pudding!

Tamaki: I'll chat while I eat

Yamato: There's no pudding in the fridge

Tamaki: Huh!?!?!?

Mitsuki: Yamato-san's just trying to tease you again.

Yamato:

Tamaki: Ah, it was a lie! That scared me!! Geez, Yama-san!!!!

Yamato: Sorry! Your reactions are so funny that I couldn't help myself.

Tsumugi: Let's continue once Tamaki-san gets back!

Tenn: I'll go make some tea.

Momo: I'll go get some Momorin~!

Riku: I wanna have a snack, too! Tamaki, let's split a pack of popcorn!

Nagi: I shall print out cosplay business cards.

Rinto: I'll go wash my bathtub.

Tsumugi: We'll chat more later, everyone!

#idolish7 #tamaki yotsuba #12 songs gift #translation #i7 #rabbit chat

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write-havoc · 6 years

Text

This Is How I Disappear Ch. 48

Summary: A girl named Chuck finds herself in the exact place she doesn't want to be, living with violent men in a desolate nursing home. After her former gym teacher finds her, will he be the savior she was looking for?

Fandom: The Walking Dead AU

Pairing: Negan/Original Female Character

Status: Completed (story continues in The Flame Is Gone, The Fire Remains)

Contains: swearing, violence, sexual assault, blood, smut

Intended for readers 18+ of age only

Masterlists in my bio

——— Negan’s POV ———

When we drive within radio range of the bridge, I call out to my guys. I tell them to stay the fuck there and to keep out of fuckin’ sight. I want to know if someone crosses back over to our side of the goddamn river. But I also don’t want Eldritch fuckin’ knowing that I’m scoping shit out. I want him to think that I’m some dumbass he can get one over on. Underestimate me so he’ll make a fuckin’ mistake that I can take advantage of.

We pull up to Alexandria a few minutes later. After we park the car, Rick starts to lead us to his house so we can fuckin’ discuss all this Eldritch shit. But Aaron comes running up to us before we get there.

Aaron looks us over and his face fuckin’ drops. “He still has her.” It’s not a question. He sees that Chuck’s not with me. He knew she was taken. Rick fuckin’ filled him in on the situation after I radioed it to him. And he looks fuckin’ crushed that she’s still out there.

I rub my hand down my chin. “Eldritch said he’d keep her until he gets what he wants,” I explain, trying not to fuckin’ break down myself.

Aaron looks at me with fuckin’ red rimmed eyes. “Is she okay, at least?”

I push my hand into my jacket pocket and take out the picture Eldritch gave me. Aaron takes it and stares at it for a moment before covering his mouth with his other hand.

He lets out a tiny sob. “She looks so scared,” he chokes out before looking up to the sky and wiping his face with his other hand. He clears his throat, calming himself down, and looks back to me with determination. “We’re gonna get her away from him.”

“Yes we are,” I respond with just as much fuckin’ certainty. I will get her home safe and fuckin’ sound if it’s the last goddamn thing I ever do.

Me, Dwight, and Arat go into Rick’s dining room to discuss shit with him, Daryl, Michonne, and Aaron. I start off by telling them the shit that went down at the meeting. Which I fuckin’ hate, by the way. I pretty much have to say that Eldritch slapped me in the face with his dick and I just sat back and took it.

But they all get it, which kinda makes everything worse. They all fuckin’ know that I can’t let anything happen to Chuck and my baby. Which means my weakness is out there with a big fuckin’ neon arrow pointing right to it for everyone to see.

Fuck. I was too open with Chuck. I should’ve done fuckin’ everything different.

“So if Eldritch is livin’ on the other side ‘a the river, why’s he comin’ over here?” Daryl asks.

“He has to have a base on this side,” Michonne answers. “Leading as many dead as he did to The Sanctuary, there’s no way he crossed the river.”

“I’m thinking the same fuckin’ thing,” I reply. “My guys on the bridge said a truck crossed it before the meet. Coulda been Eldritch heading there. He could’ve already had guys living in that fort like an outpost while he stays at fuckin’ home over here.” I shrug a little. “Don’t forget that he’s been sending smaller herds at us for a while now which, logistically, would be fuckin’ hard as shit to do from further away. It would take too much fuckin’ time and planning.” I run my hand down my beard. “He was probably just putting his fuckin’ feelers out with that shit. Seeing how we’d all do in a fight. See what kinda fuckin’ firepower we got.”

“Yeah,” Rick agrees. “Makes sense.”

“If those fuckwit brothers hadn’t fuckin’ defected and told that Eldritch fuck about my inner workings, I bet he wouldn’t have made a fuckin’ play,” I growl out, getting more pissed when I think about it.

If those fuckers hadn’t spilled their shit to Eldritch, he would have never known about Chuck...

Aaron jumps in. “He would’ve attacked us all at some point. He would’ve found the weak points eventually.”

Michonne looks to Rick. “He’ll come for us next.”

“He knows we’ve been working together,” I say to Rick. “The fact that Eldritch hasn’t attacked you is fuckin’ telling. Either he doesn’t have the men or he doesn’t have the weapons to fight both of us. And I’m fuckin’ inclined to think it’s the weapons. Since he wants mine.”

Daryl lets out a fuckin’ huff. “Then he’ll use ‘em against us once he gets ‘em.”

“Probably,” I say bluntly. “That would be the smart fuckin’ thing to do. Use my guns to take you guys out and get your guns. He’d rule this whole fuckin’ area.”

Rick scratches at his beard as he thinks. “How many weapons are we talking about?” he asks me.

“A lot,” I answer vaguely.

Everyone is silent as they process that shit. A fuckin’ psychopath is about to fall into a fuck ton of guns. And that will definitely impact every-fuckin’-body.

Daryl finally breaks the silence. “You can’t give him those weapons,” he directs at me.

“I can’t fuckin’ not ,” I bite back. “If I do the wrong fuckin’ thing here, Chuck could die. My baby could die. And I can’t take that fuckin’ risk. I won’t. She’s fuckin’ innocent.” I pause for a second at the thought. And about how all this must seem to Rick and his guys. “I know this shit sucks ass and it would be easier in the long run to take that fucker out right now, but I have no fuckin’ idea where Chuck is. If I attack him now, I could lose her for-fuckin’-ever!” I take a deep breath to calm myself down a little. “I have to play this shit smarter. Let Eldritch win now so he can fuckin’ lose later when I get my girl back. I will not put her in danger.”

“We don’t want to put Chuck in danger, either,” Rick says gently. “We’ll back your play.”

I continue. “Look. He’s not gonna get all my guns, like he fuckin’ asked. Eldritch only knows about the guns that Conner fuckin’ knew about. And I’m fuckin’ smart enough not to let anyone know exactly how many guns I have. My saviors know what’s in my fuckin’ armory. But I got stockpiles all over the fuckin’ place. So no matter what, I’m not gonna be fuckin’ defenseless. And I will have the guns to fight back against him after Chuck is safe. I will not let that fucker live one minute longer than fuckin’ necessary.”

My radio suddenly squawks to life. “ Negan? ” It’s my guys on the bridge.

“Yeah? Go ahead,” I answer.

“ That truck from earlier came back over the bridge. We followed it back to this unmarked tunnel in the middle of nowhere. It was guarded by a shit ton of guys so... I’m guessing your man was in the truck. ”

“Where’d the tunnel lead?”

“ No idea, sir. We couldn’t get that close or they’d get wind of us. ”

When my guy starts to describe this tunnel and give its location, Rick goes over to a cabinet and comes back with a big ass book of road maps for the area. He opens it to the right page and points down at the fuckin’ area.

Rick taps the page with his finger. “The tunnel must be right here.”

I put my radio away and lean over the map to look. I can’t see shit, so I get my glasses out and put them on. The place Rick pointed at looks like it’s in the fuckin’ forest. Where that tunnel leads to isn’t immediately fuckin’ obvious.

I look back at Dwight and point at the map. “You know what’s out here?” I’m not asking Rick cuz I know he’s not from around here.

Dwight comes forward to lean over the table. “Nah. I don’t know this area very well.”

I look back to Arat, wordlessly asking the same fuckin’ question.

“Sorry, sir,” Arat shakes her head and shrugs. “I’m from further north.”

“Olivia might know,” Aaron jumps in.

“She’s in the armory,” Michonne adds, prompting Aaron to leave to get the woman, I guess.

Rick looks over to me. “Olivia is originally from this area. And she’s kind of a local historian. Or used to be.”

A few minutes later, Aaron comes back in with a woman following. She’s kinda chubby with black hair in a pony tail and fuckin’ glasses on her face. She looks exactly like the kinda fuckin’ woman that would be a local historian.

“Come on over here, honey,” I call out to her with my arm outstretched in her direction. “We’re in need of your expertise.”

“O-Okay,” she says nervously and comes closer to the table.

I put my arm on her back to push her in closer to the map. “My guys found a tunnel out in the woods and we need to know where the fuck it leads.”

“What kind of tunnel?” she asks.

“It’s unmarked and leads underground,” I relay the info my guys told me. “It’s big enough for fuckin’ trucks to get in an out.”

“Hmm.” She thinks a second. “Some government building have alternate entrances. And since we’re so close to D.C., there are a lot of government buildings around.”

I point on the map where the tunnel is. “It’s right there,” I say to her.

“Umm.” Olivia pushes her glasses up her nose before leaning down to look at the map. She flips through more pages, finding maps of surrounding areas, then flipping back to the big map, but it looks like she’s not finding anything. “Hmm,” she hums then straightens up with her hands on her hips. It looks like she’s gonna fuckin’ tell me she’s got nothing, but then her face lightens up suddenly. “Oh, wait!” She leans back down and finds a zoomed in page in the book. “Here!” She points to a spot.

I lean down to look where she’s pointing. “What the fuck is it?”

“It’s a military building. Logistic... defense agency...?” She shakes her head. “Something like that. I think it dealt with military equipment or something. I toured it once. It’s a huge building with like a pond behind. It’s nice.” She shrugs a shoulder. “It’s like two miles away from that tunnel entrance.”

“You think that’s where it leads?” Rick asks Olivia as he points down to the map.

“Yeah. I’m pretty sure,” she answers.

“Where’s this place in relation to us?” I gesture out to the map.

Olivia flips back to the larger map and points to the area.

“Motherfucker,” I whisper when I see how fuckin’ close it is.

Then I realize just where it is. It’s in that overrun part that we’ve been fuckin’ avoiding.

“God damnit !” I turn and kick one of the dining room chairs across the floor. “That fucker has been in my backyard for months! If we fuckin’ cleared that huge ass herd out there, we woulda found him! We woulda fuckin’ dealt with him and this shit wouldn’t have fuckin’ happened!”

I look up and see that Olivia looks fuckin’ scared of me. But I can’t fuckin’ help it. I’m pissed off. Pissed off that all this shit is happening. Pissed off that it’s all my fault.

I hang my head and wipe at my brow. “You can leave, Olivia,” I mutter, but she hears me.

Olivia quickly pushes through everyone and hurries through the front door.

Everyone’s quiet for a few moments until Rick opens his fuckin’ mouth.

“We didn’t know-“

I whip my head up to cut him off. “I know!”

Rick glares at me for a second like I pissed him off. “I’m just saying- We can ‘shoulda coulda woulda’ all you want, but it’s not gonna solve anything. We need to find a way into Elrdrich’s base and get your wife back so we can get rid of that asshole before he ruins everything we’ve all built here!”

I process that shit. Then I nod because he’s right. “I’m gonna take my guys and head out there to check shit out. Actually see if this is where he is.”

“We’ll go, too,” Michonne says with a nod of her own.

A few minutes later, we’re on the fuckin’ road. I’m in my car with my guys and Rick is behind with Michonne, Daryl, Sasha, and Abraham.

Before we left, I radioed my guys on the bridge to tell them to stick tight. They’re going to be stationed out there for a while. Probably until all this shit with Eldritch is fuckin’ settled. That is, until he and all his fuckin’ men are dead.

When we get within a few miles of the building Olivia talked about, we park up and head off on fuckin’ foot. We don’t want to alert anyone to our fuckin’ presence. There’s a line of trees on the edge of the property, so we hide in there. And it’s just outside of where the dead fuckin’ are, so we’ll be good as long as none of us are too fuckin’ loud.

“I don’t know how anyone could live there,” Sasha comments as she looks through the scope of her rifle. “With all those dead so close.”

I look through my high powered binoculars. “They make good fuckin’ cover,” I comment. “Most of the windows are covered in newspaper, so there was definitely people in there at some point.”

We keep watching for a long fuckin’ time, but there’s no fuckin’ sign of anyone.

Abraham puts his binoculars down. “Maybe Olivia was wrong-”

“I got movement,” Daryl cuts him off. “Top floor. On the left.”

We all train our eyes on the window in fuckin’ question. And what I see makes my heart fuckin’ ache.

It’s Chuck. It’s definitely Chuck. It’s hard to see because the sun is just starting to fuckin’ set, but I know it’s her. She’s looking out the window, one of the only ones not fuckin’ covered. I can’t really see what she looks like, but I know she’s standing, so she must be not fuckin’ hurt, at least.

I smile first, glad to actually fuckin’ see her. See that she’s alright. But it falls quickly. She’s not alright. She’s prisoner to a man who wants nothing more than to fuckin’ destroy me, in a building surrounded by the goddamn dead that I can’t find a way to get into.

“That your girl?” Daryl asks.

“Yes,” I answer without taking my eyes off her.

She turns around like something got her attention, but turns back. Then I see what what she was fuckin’ looking at. Fucking Eldritch comes to stand beside her. Too fucking close to her. They talk, then both turn to leave our fuckin’ sight.

I watch for a while more to see if they come back. But they don’t, so I drop my fuckin’ binoculars. When I look around, everyone is fuckin’ staring at me.

“It was him,” is all I say, answering the fuckin’ question on all their goddamn minds.

Abraham lets out a gruff noise. “So, confirmation that this is the place.”

I take in a deep breath. “This is the fuckin’ place.”

Rick moves to stand next to me. “We still have some radio equipment left. We can find a place around here and set up a base of our own. Close to here and the tunnel so we can keep in contact in case Eldritch makes a move.” He looks around to his guys. “We can search the area for a place right now before it gets too dark.”

“I saw a country club close by on the map,” Michonne comments. “We could search it. See if it’s clear.”

I rub my hand down my face. “We have some generators back at The Sanctuary. I’ll send some guys back with them so we can set up this... recon base, I guess.” I let out a groan. “I gotta head off to fuckin’ Hilltop now. Tell them the fuckin’ news.”

We part ways, my guys and Rick’s. I’m headed to Hilltop to inform them that Gregory is coming back. I have no idea how the fuck they’re gonna take it. But I can’t have them fight me on this. I don’t know what Eldritch will do if they don’t fall in fuckin’ line.

——— ———

Chuck has been pacing around her room for the past few hours, it seems, waiting for Eldritch to get back to see how his meeting with Negan went.

Her only distraction was about an hour ago when someone came in and dropped off clothes for Chuck to change into. It was a powder blue scoopneck dress with a ribbon around the empire waist. Along with the dress is a bra and pair of underwear, which weirds Chuck out to think that Eldritch may have considered what she looks like naked. Plus, the underwear is more like lingerie, white and lacy. Definitely different from her normal cotton underthings. The man who dropped them off insisted that she change into the new outfit because it was “Eldritch’s orders” so she did, not wanting to risk raising a stink. The man removed her old clothes, including her underclothes, and gave her matching powder blue heels to wear, saying that Eldritch would collect her for dinner when he arrived.

She didn’t put the shoes on, just continued to pace without them.

He mind alternates between racing and vacant. At some points, she just mindlessly puts one foot in front of the other because that’s all she really has to do in her room. At other points, her eyes well with tears as everything she could potentially lose flows through her mind.

Her husband, her baby, her home, her life.

She finds herself staring out of her window hoping for something to focus on to keep her from going insane. That focus is shifted when the lock on the door clicks. Chuck looks back over her shoulder to see the door swing open. When she sees that it’s Eldritch, she turns back to continue looking out the window.

“Everything fits well, I see,” Eldritch says from behind her. “But you’re missing the shoes.”

Chuck doesn’t say anything in response.

“You’ve done some redecorating.” Eldritch comes up to stand beside her. “We don’t like the dead to see us moving around in here,” he comments as he plays with a bit of ripped newspaper.

“I just wanted to let the sunlight in,” Chuck replies quietly.

“We’re high enough up,” he shrugs one shoulder. “You can keep your sunshine. Besides,” he swipes a lock of her hair off her shoulder, “it suits you. Your hair is the exact color of a sunset.”

She turns away from him and walks into the center of the room, not wanting to be so close to him.

Eldritch lets out a light huff. “Sit down.”

Chuck obeys the order and sits on the edge of her bed.

He walks over to the door and bends down to pick up the heels resting on the wall beside it. Kneeling down in front of her, he starts to slip the shoes onto her feet. His hands linger on her legs a little too long, causing Chuck’s anxiety to spike.

“Are you hungry, Red?” His face tilts to see her.

Chuck just nods, not trusting her voice at that moment.

Eldritch stands, taking Chuck’s hand and pulling her up with him. He leads her back into the conference room where they first met, only now there are table settings for two at one end. Eldritch pulls out Chuck’s chair and gestures for her to sit, pushing the chair back in after. He takes his seat directly to her right, which is at the head of the table.

Eldritch takes a sip from his glass of red wine, letting out a satisfied breath after. “Would you like some?” he offers.

Chuck shakes her head.

“One glass won’t hurt the baby. They do it in Europe.”

Chuck shakes her head again. “No, thank you.”

She takes a sip of her water and notices that the glass is very heavy. It’s expensive crystal, just like Eldritch’s wine glass. And the silverware is very nice, too. Everything at the table is incredibly fancy, almost like the table settings were taken from a presidential dinner.

A couple of men walk in carrying covered trays containing the entrees, Chuck assumes. The men set the plates down in front of Chuck and Eldritch and swiftly leave.

Eldritch shakes out his napkin and sets it in his lap. “We might not have everything you’re used to here, but I instructed the women to prepare the nicest meal they can with what we have.” He looks down to his plate. “It smells delicious, don’t you think?”

“The women?” Chuck asks, ignoring Eldritch’s question. She has only seen men here since she arrived. And the way he said the words rubs Chuck the wrong way.

“Yes. The women,” he answers. “I know you haven’t seen them, but I have women here. I just keep them away from all this ugliness.” He gestures upwards, vaguely denoting the state of the world, Chuck assumes. “We’re fighting a war everyday, now. And women are nothing but liabilities on the front lines. I don’t put my people in danger like Negan does by sticking women where they don’t belong.” He takes another sip of wine. “But you women are useful in other ways.” He points to the food. “Cooking, cleaning. Hopefully child rearing in the future.” He sticks his fork in his food. “Eat,” he demands before taking his bite.

Chuck takes a small bite, but refuses to raise her head to him. She’s absolutely hating this. Eating with him like everything is normal is one thing. But listening to his misogynistic views is another. Everything in her wants to stand up to him, but she is afraid to make him angry.

“How is it?” he asks.

“It’s very good.” Chuck wants to make sure to praise the women, because she has a feeling that their lives here are probably pretty dire. Not that the food isn’t good. It’s actually delicious.

“One of the women was a five star chef. She makes all my food.”

“What’s her name?”

He casts his eyes up in thought then looks back to his plate. “I don’t know.”

That sends a chill down Chuck’s spine. He knows why this woman is useful to him, but not her name. Like she’s not an actual person.

They eat for a few minutes in silence before Eldritch resumes the conversation. “I thought you’d be asking about your husband as soon as I got you. You don’t want to know how the meeting went?”

“How did it go?” she asks almost quietly. It’s not that she didn’t want to know. It’s just that she didn’t want to ask. If the meeting went poorly, she didn’t want to risk being on the receiving end of Eldritch’s anger. Because who better to take it out on than her.

Eldritch smiles. “It went exactly as I wanted it to. Negan is cooperating one hundred percent. He’ll be pulling his men out of his outposts and handing over all of his guns to me when we meet again in two days.” He lets out a little chuckle, very pleased with himself.

Chuck knows that no matter what, Negan would never fully cooperate with Eldritch. Whatever Negan said to Eldritch, he has a plan to take him down. Negan always has a plan.

“Am I going home when you meet again?” Chuck asks, hopeful.

He shakes his head. “I still need you a little bit longer, Red. Besides, I think I‘m starting to like you.”

She looks down to her plate and tries to blink away the ears that are starting to fill her eyes.

They finish the rest of their meal in a tense silence, only the occasional clanking of a fork on a plate breaking it. When the dishes are empty, Eldritch takes Chuck by the hand and leads her back into her room.

Chuck’s eyes immediately land on her bed and the white satin nightgown that sits on top of it. Someone had apparently left it there while she was out.

Eldritch gestures to the garment. “Put it on.”

Chuck turns to face Eldritch to wait for him to leave. But he doesn’t. Instead, he grasps her shoulders and turns her back to him. When Chuck feels him tug at the zipper to her dress, she instantly flips around and backs away from him.

“Don’t!” she yells and throws one arm around herself while she holds the other out to keep Eldritch back.

He walks toward Chuck with a stoic look on his face. “I’m just helping you into your nightgown, Charlotte.”

“I won’t wear it!” she cries out in fear.

His face suddenly twists in anger. “You’ll wear it or nothing !” he screams in her face. He backs away and inhales a few heavy breaths to steady himself. “Either you let me take the dress off you or I’ll rip it off and take the nightgown with me, too,” he says more calmly.

Chuck weighs her options and hesitantly turns around to face away from Eldritch, making her choice to let him undress her.

Eldritch slowly unzips the dress and pushes it down her arms. But he doesn’t let the dress drop. He kneels down behind her to pull it to her feet. “Step out.”

Obeying the order, she steps out of the dress with one foot, then the other.

“Turn around and step out of the shoes, too,” Eldritch orders again still from a kneeling position.

Wrapping her arms around herself to shield her from his gaze, she turns and kicks the shoes off before he can touch her. She hopes to god that he’s not going to take her underclothes off as well.

Eldritch grabs the nightgown from the bed and walks to her. “Arms up.”

Chuck raises her arms and Eldritch pulls the nightgown over her arms and head, letting it fall down he body naturally. She immediately brings her arms back around her, still feeling too exposed. The nightgown is spaghetti strapped and made of thin satin cut above the knee.

Eldritch steps back and bends down to take the matching white satin kitten heel slippers from beside the bed. “Put these on.” He hands them to Chuck then goes to the door, opening it and calling out for someone.

Chuck throws the slippers down and slips them on, completely confused and upset about what is happening. Her tears are freely falling from her eyes and traveling down her cheeks.

Eldritch comes back in with his Polaroid camera, pausing to look Chuck up and down.

“Perfect,” he whispers with a smile and brings the camera up to take the picture.

#negan #negan fanfiction #negans thirst squad #negan x oc #negan x original female character #negan x ofc #negan / ofc #negan / oc #negan / original female character #jdm #jeffrey dean morgan #the walking dead fanfiction #the walking dead au #the walking dead #this is how i disappear #tihid #writehavoc writes #writehavoc this is how i disappear

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the-winter-spider · 7 years

Text

All In Your Head - Part Three

A/N: Im SOOOO glad so many of you like this series i was so nervous people were gonna hate it cuz it was so random and out there.

PS This chapter is more of a filer, next chapter will be explain why the reader has going on what she does! lotsa angst next chapter, yaaaaasssss

Pairings: Sam x Dean x Reader!sister

Word Count: 1,400

Masterlist

Flashbacks are in italics

“What the hell do you mean Cas” Getting a little too close to the angel for Sam’s liking he step between Dean and Castiel, putting his hand on Dean’s chest giving him a little nudge back only to have Dean shove Sam’s hand away “Don’t Sammy”

“I think you need to relax Dean”

“No i don't think i do Sam, what the hell is your problem?! How are you so calm!” Dean steadied himself, eyeing his brother down.

“Because getting all riled up isn't going to help y/n”

“Oh, are you saying I’M not helping her” Dean laughed

“No, I..”

Cutting Sam off, Dean continued “Good, because last time i checked we wouldn't even be in this situation if it wasn't for you”

“Dean” Sam warned his voice now starting to lace with anger

“Dont, “Dean” me Sam, You know damn well this is all your fault” Dean spat at his little brother. Sam’s face faltered.

“Dean” Cas called out

Dean rolled his eyes, shoving passed Sam “Cas?” His eyes now pleading for an answer.

Looking weary between both brothers before he continued “I mean, she didn’t just see him. She was in the cage with him, he’s getting stronger.”

“How could she have been in the cage with him when she was here the whole time” Sam chimed in.

“Her soul, part of her soul. Its breaking apart, her minds getting weaker, and the weaker she gets, the more of her he can take, and he’ll take until there is nothing left to take”

“So in other words, until she's dead” Dean spoke bluntly

“How do we stop it?”

“I don't know Sam. I'll look around” And with that the angel was gone in the blink of an eye.

Dean sighed letting out a shaky breath, running his hand down his face, something he seems to have been doing a lot lately, he finally broke down in sobs “What are we going to do Sammy? I can't lose her”

Sam’s eyes were laced with sorrow for what could happen, pain from what his little sister must have been going through the whole time behind closed doors, and heartbreak from seeing the strongest person he’s ever known break down right in front of him. He didn’t know what to do, he was in shock, but when he heard his older brother, the man he always aspired to be like in strength and bravery whisper out those three words his heart twisted in ways he’s only felt a few times before.

“I'm scared, Sammy” Dean whispered out, wiping away the last of his tears.

“Dean” Mary finally spoke, after watching the scene fold out in front of her, she could see how much y/n meant to Sam and mostly Dean.

“Mom, don’t. I don’t want to hear it” Dean’s overall composure changed, Sam could see his brothers walls building up again, the moment was gone. “I'm going to stay in y/n’s room tonight” Dean directed towards Sam, “Mary, you can sleep in my room tonight” turning on his heels making his way towards your room, when his back made it around the corner.

Sam finally let his own tears fall once he could no longer see his older brother, he tried his best to hold it together for not only y/n but for Dean to.

Mary made her way over to her youngest son, pulling him the best she could towards her for a hug, which wasn’t easy considering how much taller he was than her.

“Oh Sammy” She whispered rubbing circles on his back. When Sam finally calmed down, Mary gestured for them to sit “Wanna tell me what happened with y/n?” Sam nodded

“I'm scared Dee, what if i miss? Dad will freak!”

Dean came over kneeling down to your height, you were 16, making Dean 24. Dean was helping you practice your shooting for tonight’s hunt, You Dad, John was letting you take the lead on a simple salt and burn she like he did with both Sam and Dean when they turned 16. Nervous was beyond how you felt, you’ve been on many hunts before but you were always told to stay in the impala unless, John ordered for you to come. You spent most of the time doing the research, which was usually what you use to do with Sammy, but ever since he left for Law School, your Dad was a lot harder on you than he ever was before, it was breaking you down but you never showed it, you couldn’t show it. Dean, he knew though, he went through the same thing you did, and ever since Sammy left you and Dean grew closer than ever and you always hoped it stayed that way. You knew neither of them were in touch with Sam anymore, both of the men could hold grudges, you were though.

How could you not be? He was family, and you didn’t have anyone else in this type of life but family, you were happy Sam got out, you never dreamed of getting out, whatever that truly meant, you knew nothing but this life and you couldn’t imagine you’d be you without it.

“Just take a deep breath y/n, you can do it. You are a Winchester after all” Dean smiled giving your hair a ruffle.

“Hey!” you giggled “Not cool Dean-o” Lifting up the gun filled with salt bullets, you took a deep breath in before you took your shot, nailing the bullseye dead in the middle, reloading three more times hitting it the same spot every time. You dropped the gun turning to look at Dean, his mouth gaped open, your eyes light up “I-i-” you stuttered up, Dean looked over at you “That's my girl!” He picked you up spinning you in circles, you let out a loud squeal “I'm so proud of you sweetheart, i knew you could do it”

Dean took a deep breath stopping at your bedroom door, he hung his head, not ready to see you. He loved you more than he could put into words, you were his little sister being 8 years younger than him, he always put you before Sam and him. He always wished more for you, always wished you could of gotten out, no matter how hard he begged you never did. He could never stop blaming himself for leaving you when Sam went in the cage to live a normal life with Lisa, he tried so hard to keep in touch with you, but you were too busy looking for anyway to bring Sam back, like he should've been doing to. He knew Sam felt the same way about how when Dean went to purgatory, Sam left her while she searched for a way to get Dean out.

Finally pushing the door open, he slid in. He felt his heart drop, you still had a little bit of blood surrounding your nose. Sam tried his best to clean you up, he winced looking at your arms, he could see blood coming through your bangade. He pulled up the chair from the corner of your room, pulling it to the side of your bed. Gently taking your hand between yours, he brought it to his lips giving it a kiss “Y/n you need to be okay, I don’t know if i could make it without you. I don’t know how Sammy and i could do it” He sobbed out “I love you so much sis”

Hours passed and Dean was trying his best to get some rest, he knew he needed it for the long road they had in front of them but it was hard he was on high alert for any type of movement from you. Dean almost lost hope of you waking up tonight, he swore he felt your hand twitch in his.

“Y/n?” He whispered, waiting a few minutes when he didn’t get a response he sighed closing his eyes shut tonight, he swore he wasn't going to cry again.

“Dee” you mumbled out

Dean's eyes shot open “Y/n?”

You turned your head towards him, tears streaming from your eyes “He has me”

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graysonjackoftheblack-blog · 7 years

Text

The Endless Night

Summary: The Night the replays in Grayson’s mind over and over again. The night he lost his sister. The night he truly began to lose himself. Trigger Warnings: Car accident, character death Word Count: 2,030

“Oh I love this song!” Arielle said gleefully as she reached out to turn the volume of the radio up, Grayson snorted lightly as she started to belt out the lyrics to Like A Prayer. She grinned at him and reached over to poke and prod at him, trying to get him to sing along. He swatted at her hand and lost his grip on his bag from the bookstore, Arielle’s smile faded and her face paled at the sight of the dark grimoire in her baby brother’s lap. “That’s what you had me drive you to the store for so urgently?” Her words were soft and full of disbelief. Grayson scrambled to clutch the book to his chest as if afraid she would take it and throw it out of the window. “I ordered it special and it just came in and they don’t hold things for long! You know that!” His voice cracked pathetically and she shook her head, eyeing the book warily from the corner of her eye. “I just don’t get why you’re so interested, Gray.” She tried to keep her voice soft, non-confrontational; she didn’t want to fight but when it came to this there was no telling what would set Grayson off. She felt a shift in the air and her own magic simmered under her skin in response to the unintentional threat her brother was giving off. “It’s just a hobby, Ari! I’m not doing anything wrong! I’m not hurting anyone!” Grayson snapped, glaring at her and she took a slow breath to try and calm her own magic as his snapped and crackled through that. “I know that, you’d never hurt anyone, Gray. I know.” She kept her voice soft and crooning almost, “I’m just worried about you accidentally getting hurt.” Her breath caught in her throat when he slashed the air with one hand and his magic cracked through the air, cracking the windshield in front of them. “I know what I’m doing!!” He cried and she felt like she couldn’t breathe, the car trembled under them. “Gray?! Grayson, calm down!” She cried, her magic pulsing and trying to sooth his emotions and his magic. “Get off my back, Arielle!” He replied and the engine of the car revved and Arielle cursed as she tried to get it back under her control, the machine jerking and trembling around them. She couldn’t even hear Grayson’s yelling and cursing anymore, there was the sound of rushing wind and with one last shout of her baby brother’s name the car flipped and she screamed, reaching for him. “Ari!” His voice was high with terror as he scrambled to hold on to something. “Ari!!” She sobbed out his name and then felt her head crack against something and was knocked out.

When she came to she could hear people yelling and talking around them, there were sirens and other loud noises and she groaned in pain. She heard someone calling to her and peered blearily through the broken windshield. The man crouching down to look at her was pale with dark curly hair and she vaguely recognized him as someone who went to school with her older brother and sister. He was a Hudson, they were well known in her community, he would help them, she just knew it. He watched as he called out to some of the others, letting them know someone in the car was awake and he was keeping her calm. “Don’t move, okay. And don’t panic, you hit something when you flipped and you’re pinned but we’re going to get you out. My magic is helping your magic keep you stable but I need you to stay calm and let it do what it’s doing.” He said softly and she blinked slowly before giving him and small smile of agreement. “Gray? S’okay?” She mumbled lowly and he glanced at the passenger seat, she saw the flash of something in his face, something not good and suddenly she felt cold and turned her head enough to peer at her baby brother. Grayson was crumbled against the passenger side door and she could see blood flowing down the side of his face from his head. “Gray.” She moaned pathetically, her fingers twitching, she could barely sense him and she was right next to him. “Don’t! Don’t move! He’s alright, he’s alive, but if you move you won’t make it.” Hudson said sharply and she gave him a fierce look. “He’s my baby brother. I’m not letting him go.” She practically snarled, he stared her down for a moment before sighing and nodding. “I think our magic working together can keep you stable enough to move just a little but if you move too much then that little pinprick of pain you feel from the steering wheel crushing into is going to get a lot worse and your chances of survival will go down.” His voice was hard and unrelenting and uncharitably she wondered if he had anyone he cared about or if he only cared about survival. She could’ve sworn he had a twin so he should’ve understood wanting to keep a sibling safe and well. She gave him another fierce look before slowly reaching out to her brother, her fingers barely brushing his neck. “Gray, baby? Graaaby.” She crooned softly, trying to coax him back to her. “Come on, Little Gray, come back to me and Jay.” She felt tears sliding down her cheeks and bit her lip to keep from sobbing. Even the vague connection she was getting from brushing his neck with her fingertips gave her a sense of dread as it filled her senses with the Darkness growing in her baby brother. If this kept up she and Jason would lose him to the Dark, possibly forever, that is if he even survived this crash, despite sensing his magic and the Darkness in it she could barely sense her brother’s life force. Breathing heavily she looked back at the man who was essentially keeping her alive. “Who had a higher chance of living before you and your magic interfered?” She demanded and he tilted his head at her as if debating answering. “He did, but the longer it takes them to cut you out the lower his chances get, yours are higher now that I’m helping and will probably stay at this level as long as neither of us interrupts our magic.” His eyes narrowed as if he was finally wondering where she was going with her line of questioning. “He’s my baby brother. I’m not letting him go.” She said again and his eyes widened as understanding. “I’m not letting you die.” He said, his voice taking on a strange tone. “You can’t stop me. It’s my life, my magic. I’m not letting him die for me, so … Look after him, please. Promise me. Jason won’t be able to help him alone, he spoils Gray too much you see. So Promise me you’ll look after Grayson.” She ordered him. He watched her for what felt like hours and she could feel Gray slipping further away from her. “No … I can’t let you do that, I’m sorry.” He said and she practically snarled and took hold of her magic, halting its progress of helping her stay alive. “Stop that!” He ordered as she reached for Grayson once more, using her magic to push herself closer, a scream tore out of her at the pain that flared up in her. “Promise me cuz I’m doing this no matter what!” She glared at him fiercely, but he shook his head once more. “Promise me!!” He closed his eyes and his head dipped in acquiescence. Arielle cried out again as she managed to get her hand cupped around the back of Grayson’s neck. “I won’t let you go, Gray. You’re my baby brother and I love you. Jason and I always swore that we would look out for you and take care of you. Don’t give in, Gray, your light is one of the most amazing lights I’ve ever seen, don’t let it go out.” Then she was whispering the words to every protection spell she knew to try and keep him safe, secretly hoping that it would do more than save him from this accident. She willed and wished for her magic to keep him safe from the Darkness that was trying to consume him, unsure if it would work like that or not. Her vision was blurry and dark around the edges when she opened her eyes to look at him one last time. She saw the protection rune branded on the skin of the back of his neck at his hairline. “I love you, Gray.” She smiled as her eyes fluttered shut and she knew no more.

Grayson whimpered and almost flinched at the noises around him, he didn’t want to open his eyes, everything felt weird and smelled weird and he hurt. The last thing he remembered was going to the bookstore with Arielle, and her trying to get him to sing along to her favorite song. He blinked slowly, his eyesight was blurry as he took in the hospital room he was in, a flash of something familiar and then his brother Jason filled his view. There was a small sad smile on Jason’s face and he felt his brother’s hand brush his hair back and gently stroke his cheek. “Hey there, Little Gray.” Jason practically crooned and Grayson felt tears prick his eyes as he cast his senses out to try and feel the rest of his family. He was startled when he felt Jason’s magic meet his and keep his senses back. He blinked up at his brother in confusion and Jason made a soft soothing noise. “Jay…?” He mumbled, leaning into his brother’s touch as Jason brushed his hair back once more. “You should rest, Gray.” Jason said softly. Gray nudged his hand and pouted at him a bit and Jason breathed out a chuckle. “Where’s Ari? Is she okay? She was screaming and scared…. It was my fault, I lost control.” He whimpered and saw Jason close his eyes as if in pain, neither of them noticed the door open or someone enter his room. “Gray….” Jason cut himself off and his grip briefly tightened on Grayson’s head as agony swept across his face. “Jay? What happened to Ari!?” Grayson demanded. “She died.” They both turned their heads and saw Gabriel Hudson standing just inside the door, a stoic look on his face making him look remarkably like his father. “What? How!?” Gray demanded, he tried to sit up but Jason wouldn’t let him. He didn’t see the warning look that Jason shot Gabriel that caused the older Mataku to just briefly raise an eyebrow. “We had a choice to make. We couldn’t save both of you, we had to choose the one with the highest chance of surviving. Your sister was being crushed by the steering wheel and half the dashboard. There was no way to save her, not even with magic.” Gabriel’s voice was void of any emotion though Jason could see his hands shaking as he lied to the teenager in the bed. Grayson let out a moan of despair as he stared up at Gabriel, before turning his pleading eyes to Jason. “I know, Gray, I know. Shhh, little brother. It’s alright, I’m here.” Jason cooed as he eased the bed into a sitting position and squirmed onto the bed next to Grayson to cuddle the younger boy. Grayson let out another keening wail of despair as he started to sob into Jason’s chest. “Big brother has you, it’s going to be alright, Little Gray.” Jason shot Gabriel a look as he held Grayson close with one arm and stroked the protection rune with his other hand. Grayson had no idea it was there and if Jason had his way he’d never know what Arielle had given up for him. Gabriel gave a slow nod before silently exiting the room leaving the two brothers to their grief, he felt the overwhelming urge to call his twin.

#tw: car accident #tw: character death #selfpara #self para #para #The Endless Night #tag: i hear your voice #tag: i wanted to be you and then i fell #tag: angel with false wings #<for gabe? a work in progress

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