#so yeah i'm a bit more comfortable going super fem again

[queerstudiesnatural]

i'm in such a girlie phase i've started wearing makeup again, i've bought some new dresses, and now i'm applying hair extensions. i'm going full rachel berry season 4 😬

[astermath]

hiya! i’m a really big fan of your stranger things work and I was wondering, if youre comfortable of course, a steve x reader period imagine where reader tried to hide their period from Steve, but he finds out and is super fluffy and sweet about it? thank you!

HAHAH wow i have let this ask stew in my inbox since last year thats CRAZY im so sorry my dear,, i was going through old asks and i rlly like this prompt actually so here u go, i hope u enjoy!!!!

pairing: steve harrington x fem!reader

tags: established relationship, obv mentions of periods / menstruation, reader is referred to as female, steve being dense at first lol, regular sized font below!

wc: 1.4K

notes: while the reader in this fic is female, i am well aware not everyone who has a period is a girl, and not everyone who's a girl has a period!

Steve is one attentive boyfriend.

It’s the early stages of your relationship, the golden era, the honeymoon phase. And while you’re a still a bit nervous about it all, you couldn’t be happier, because he does it all right.

He knows your favourite snacks, what music you like, what makes you laugh, what makes you cry. He’s starting to figure out your ins and outs, and it’s almost crazy how quickly he’s catching on. You have no reason to feel judged by him at any point, he truly is comfort poured into the shape of a person.

So then why are you staring at your phone right now, struggling to dial his number and just tell him why you can’t make it to your date?

It’s not usually this bad, at least it hadn’t been for a while, so why now, of all moments, must you be forsaken to be terrorised by your period?

You bite your lip, laying flat onto your bed, hand over your lower stomach. It's right where the pain is just gnawing at you, just like the guilt is. But you know you’d feel even guiltier if you just stood him up, he doesn’t deserve that. You sit up, a tad slowly to save yourself from another cramp, and swallow your nerves for now.

“I’ll just… Tell him I’m sick. Yeah… Yeah I can do that.” You think to yourself.

The combination of his number had started to feel natural to your fingers now, unlike how anxiously you pressed the buttons the first time, triple checking before finally pressing call. You're triple checking again now, more so because you're not sure you can handle hearing the defeat in his voice when you tell him you can't make it.

The phone barely gets a moment to ring before he picks it up, and his all too familiar sweet voice comes through the device.

"Hey babe, everything okay over there?"

You pause a moment before replying. "How did you know it was me calling?"

"Lover's intuition." He chuckles, and it makes your heart flutter. It's not fair how easy it is for him to do that to you, but you enjoy it nonetheless. "So, what's going on?"

"I, uh..." God, getting the words out is like pulling teeth. But you'd rather die than let him think you just got cold feet about your movie date. "I'm really not feeling too well right now, Steve... I'm-- I'm so sorry, I'm gonna have to cancel for tonight." Your eyes are welling up with tears before he even gets a chance to reply, just imagining his pretty face losing its bright expression when hearing your unfortunate news.

"Oh," damnit, he does sound sad, "that's okay, uhm... Is there anything I can do? What kinda sick is it?"

Shit, he's gonna make you say it, isn't he? You know Steve is a mature guy, he knows about periods, knows how they work, but you've been told to suck it up and get on with it before... A part of you is still disappointed that you just can't.

"U-Uhm... It's more like, a stomach thing, I guess?" It's the best way you can put it for now, hoping it'll put his worries to rest.

"Okay, I see..." You can nearly hear him thinking, the subtle noise of bags being moved and a fridge being opened coming through the phone. "Uh, how aboouuut... I come over to yours, and we just watch a movie at home? I still got a couple of tapes we haven't gotten to, and I can bring some light snacks that won't upset your stomach too much."

The thought of Steve caring for you while you're sick sends a warm feeling through your entire body. God, how does he just keep getting better? But you can't lie to him, right? It's not like you're really sick, unless you count the curse of menstruation as a symptom.

Before you get a chance to explain, he's talking again, and by the ruckus in the background you can only guess he's rushing to grab all his stuff. "I'll be heading out in a bit, I'll stop by the corner store too, stay put for me alright? See ya in a bit!"

You're sure he didn't realize he wasn't letting you talk, but frankly, you probably couldn't even come up with a response on time anyways. Right now, you just have to worry about looking somewhat presentable, and maybe figure out a way to tell him you're not actually sick.

By the time you've brushed your hair and brushed some mascara onto your lashes, you're already hearing the doorbell. You just manage to pull a fresh shirt over your head, before stumbling down the stairs and stopping in front of the door. With a deep, loaded, sigh you open it, to reveal your boyfriend.

Hair messed up, plastic bag in hand, jacket haphazardly thrown on. He clearly rushed to be here, still panting a little, but in your eyes, he's the image of your guardian angel, your saviour in need.

Before either of you know it, you're crying again, your freshly applied mascara now leaving thin black streaks over your cheeks. Your hands go up to cover your face, embarrassed, not even sure why you're sobbing all of a sudden. The feelings just hit you like a freight train, rocking you before you even have a time to rationalize.

Steve's expression falters, the bag he had in hand dropping to the floor in an instant, stepping in closer so he can carefully wrap his arms around you and pull you to his chest. Not too tight, he doesn't want to startle you. He's a bit distraught; he's really only seen you cry at a sad movie scene before, so he's a bit unsure as to what's caught you to be so upset right now.

"I-I'm sorry..." you manage to mutter through your incoherent sobs and sniffs, effectively ruining the front of his shirt in the process.

"Hey, hey..." His big hands go up to your face, gently cupping your wettened cheeks as he looks into your teary eyes. Hell, the image of you is almost enough to make him break too. "What're you sorry for? You can't help it that you're sick, right?"

The reminder of your lie makes you want to break eye contact in shame, but it's hard to force yourself to lose sight of that soft, caring gaze of his.

"I," sniff, "I lied, I'm so sorry Steve, I-- I'm not sick, I just... I have..."

He watches you expectedly, not upset, just curious. You'd surely have your reasons if whatever caused you to cancel is making you this upset.

"I'm... I'm just on my period and it-- it hurts really bad, it's not even usually this bad, and I felt like I was overreacting and I feel so bad and--" Your ramble gets cut short by his chuckle, the same one that nearly caused you to melt over the phone earlier.

"W-Wha... Why are you laughing?" You're not sure if you should be happy or worried, you're already experiencing so much at once, it's hard to pick one emotion to feel.

"Nothing, it's just, well," he picks up the bag he dropped, opening it slightly to show the bars of chocolate, candy and your favorite chips inside. "I had a feeling."

The sight of it makes you snap out of your state of distress, and you can’t help but crack a smile through your tears. “Seriously? How?”

He shrugs, a sheepish smile adorning his face. “I told you, lover’s intuition.” He pulls you back to him and kisses your head. “There’s another bag in the car with chicken soup in case I was wrong.”

You both laugh, just hugging on your doorstep for a moment. You have to let it sink in, that maybe Steve just is that sweet and considerate of a guy.

“D’you wanna go inside, or does standing outside help with cramps?” He pulls back a little, and you fight the urge to poke him in the ribs for his sarcasm. You love it either way.

“Yeah, let’s go inside. We can watch When Harry Met Sally and I can cry my eyes out again. Sound good?”

“Sounds perfect.”

-

-

-

-

-

-

[ahsxual]

stu macher x fem reader where stu is her best friend and hes a tattoo artist, so he gives her a tattoo and goes down on her mid tattooing ?? just bunch of smut hehe 🫶🏻

Tattoo Your Pleasure On Me

Warnings: minors dni +18, oral sex (f!receaving), fingering, lots of teasing, overstimulation, reader's first tattoo, reader loves horror and the tattoo is related to that, squirting

Genre: Smut

Word Count: 1,9k

A/N: I swear you guys have the best ideas... I hope you enjoy this as much as I did! Thanks for sending me your request, dear anon ✨🫶🏼

Today you were feeling more nervous than usual, yet the excitement was definitely palpable too. However, you couldn't be judged, since your best friend was going to do your first tattoo ever. You've always wanted to tattoo something meaningful, yet pretty on yourself. You thought that tattoos and body art were pretty cool, that it would convey a powerful message that would stay with you for the rest of your life. It was certainly a big commitment and you were so ready for it.

Stu used to tease you about wanting to tattoo your whole body with whatever came to his mind and, when you agreed to do it on your own terms, he was surprised and immediately thrilled. Now, here you were, at his small tattoo studio laying on the tattoo stretcher, as you trembled slightly and your eyes wouldn't move away from the ceiling.

"Hey sweet cheeks, just chill alright? I promise you're in good hands! Probably the best hands in town, actually." Stu chuckled loudly in an attempt to calm you down in his own way, which actually worked if you were honest. His goofiness and serenity always reassure you whenever you felt nervous, and that's why he was your best friend, after all.

"Yeah, I know. It's just... you know, first times are the scariest." you chuckled nervously, as he looked at you while raising his eyebrows in a perverted way.

"And the next times always feel better, don't they?" he stuck his tongue out playfully and laughed at his own not-so-innocent comment. You rolled your eyes at him, as you also laughed softly at his remark.

"You know, you really surprised me with this one, Y/N. I never thought you would want me to tattoo you, but oh man, I'm glad you did.! You'll be even sexier than you already are!" he gasped, before laughing when you punched his arm, as he sat on his chair next to you with the material he needed.

"Stop messing around and do it already, Stu!" you shouted at him playfully with a broad smile on your face, as you watched him get super excited for what was about to happen.

"Alright alright, you're the one in charge here, ma'am! So... just letting you know it's gonna hurt a bit, so tell me when it gets too much, ok?" he warned you more seriously this time and you nodded slowly, your anxiety starting to show again.

He noticed your behavior change, so he placed his gloved hand on your thigh to calm you down. You immediately felt a warm sensation run through your body... an unexpected, yet pleasant reaction to his comforting touch. You decided to ignore that strange feeling for your best friend for now, so that he could concentrate and finish his work.

"But don't worry, ok? It's gonna be all good and I'm here if you need anything. You will love it, trust me! Now, if you'll excuse me..." you smiled at him, before you let him pull down your shorts just a bit.

You wanted to tattoo a knife with a rose entwined just above your genitals and at the end of your torso. It was meaningful for you, since you've always loved horror movies and, most of the time, you had a crush on the killer or villain, so that's why the rose was also included. You thought it was something simple, subtle, sexy and somehow meaningful to you. As you can imagine, Stu was absolutely smitten with your idea and immediately wanted to be the one to tattoo it on you.

When he started to place the inked needle into your sensitive skin, you gasped in pain. Stu looked at you initially worried, until a smirk appeared on his face.

"You got this, doll. I know this is a delicate area, but I'll take good care of you. I'll make it quick." and he started tattooing you again.

You tried to hold in a few gasps of pain, when suddenly he touched an extremely sensitive spot of yours, which made you accidentally moan in pain. You bit your lips hard after muttering an embarrassed "sorry" as your cheeks turned red. When you looked at Stu expecting him to make fun of you, he was instead staring at you for a moment with a serious, unreadable expression and dilated pupils, before returning to his work without saying a word. You found his behavior strange, as you felt even more embarrassed now. You've just moaned in front of your best friend, so it's totally normal to feel like that!

As time passed, you were admiring his work with a slight grin on your face since he was almost done, before he changed his position, causing his finger and the palm of his large hand brush against your core. You tried your best to keep quiet so as not to reveal the wave of pleasure you suddenly felt, and now your clit was uncontrollably aching for more contact. And to make things worse, he simply left his hand right there to finish the last details of your tattoo. For a moment, you wondered if he'd done it on purpose or not.

"You're ok there?" his low tone made you jump, as you weren't expecting him to speak and because his voice sounded... deeper somehow.

"Yeah, I uh.... I'm good, don't worry." you gave him your fakest smile, so as not to show him how extremely turned on you were by that sight: his focused face and blue eyes fixed on your hips, as his large, gloved hands moved the needle with such precision; his forearms were visibly tense to hold your skin and the needle with his other hand.

He had already finished your tattoo, but pretended he was still working so he could discreetly touch your clothed pussy. If he wasn't Stu Macher and you didn't know him so well, you would have thought he hadn't done it intentionally. However, you knew him well and clearly were aware of his real intentions. You held back a moan as you tried to pull your hips away from him, but he seemed to follow your movements, pressing harder until it was quite obvious of what he was doing.

"Someone seems to be turned on by being tattooed by their dear "best friend"." he smirked widely as his tone changed at the word that described your relationship, but best friends aren't supposed to feel turned on by each other, right?

"I can feel your wetness through your shorts, doll. Are you sure you're alright?" he teased you while frowning innocently, trying miserably to act clueless. Your breathing began to get heavier, as you looked at Stu with a desperate look. He read your body language expertly, before he stood up to lean closer to you and whisper softly.

"What would you do if I ripped off your pretty shorts and panties and ate you out until you're begging me to stop, huh? Does that sound as good to you as it does for me, baby? You know, just your reward for behaving so well and being such a good girl for me..." he licked and bit your earlobe, before kissing your neck with his warm, wet tongue.

One of his hands stroked your clothed clit, while the other was gripping your hair. This time, you moaned loudly at his gestures, without trying to stop him and actually encouraging him to continue.

"You have to answer me with words, baby. Otherwise, I won't do anything to you. So, how is it gonna be? Are you gonna let me make you cum in my mouth? Because I swear... your tattoo his really doing something to me, love..." you suddenly grabbed Stu's short hair and pulled him into a hungry, sloppy kiss. He reciprocated immediately, his tongue fighting for dominance over yours as he took off his glove. His right hand slipped inside your shorts and rubbed your soaked pussy.

"Holy shit, Y/N... I've never felt a girl this wet before. Is this really all for me? Fuck, you're gonna be the death of me..." he said between long breaths, clearly losing control.

It was then that he broke the kiss and positioned himself between your legs, before he removed your shorts and drenched panties in one swift movement. He barely had time to admire your pussy, no longer in control of himself, as he opened and grabbed your legs firmly before diving into your dripping cunt. He started to give you long licks and fucking your wet hole with his long tongue, before sucking your clit and shaking his head like a starving man. You were moaning like crazy, the feeling of his mouth on your pussy being too much for you to be able to hold back your orgasm. He must have been incredibly experienced with other girls, because there was no way that was his first time eating pussy. He was devouring you as if you were his favorite and last meal, and that he also needed to eat you out to get oxigen to live. It wasn't long before your first orgasm came.

"Fuck Stu, I'm gonna fucking cum! Please don't stop, just like that!!" you shouted, before letting out a scream mixed with a powerful moan, as the intensity of your first orgasm was something you had never experienced before.

While you were recovering from your first orgasm, you noticed Stu approaching to see your reaction with his mouth and lips covered in your cum, while he held your trembling legs.

"This is what I mean when I say I want my girl to almost pass out from pleasure!" he laughed at his own joke, before kissing your inner thighs. "Come on baby, let's do it again! I'll be so disappointed and embarrassed if I only make you cum once."

As you tried to process what he had just said, you felt his lips and tongue once again on your pussy, making you wince and shudder from overstimulation. He didn't seem to care about your pleas to slow down, and to tease you further, he added two long fingers inside you, before curling them in the right spot.

"Fuck Stu no, that's too much!!" you screamed desperately as you tried to reach his head, but his hand was faster and stronger, so he grabbed your arm and put his over your belly. The moment he applied that pressure to your uterus while pinning you down, as he fastened his fingers deep inside you and sucked your clit harshly, you felt a strong pressure inside your lower parts that was almost painful. Seconds later, while you were still screaming and moaning Stu's name, you squirted all over his face and fingers. If you thought your previous orgasm was intense, nothing could describe what you felt at that moment. Stu let go of you slowly, before he looked at you dumbfounded and with a proud look plastered on his face. You stared at him back with concern and shame from what you just did.

"Omg, I'm so sorry Stu... I-I didn't mean-"

"Just shut up and do it again. Now that I know you're capable of doing that... you're not leaving until you do it again, you understand me?"

[kitscutie]

hiii !! i was wondering can you do a fic where rafe comes and picks the reader up from a girls night out and she’s super drunk? tyy!

girls just wanna have fun (rafe cameron x fem!reader)

pairing: rafe cameron x fem!reader

warnings: feel bad for y/n and fluff (a little bit of psycho rafe at the end!?)

summary: after a rogue night at the boneyard you are in desperate need of comfort from your knight in shining armour - rafe cameron.

a/n: i am still trying to be more active while school is picking up but please bare with me :)

word count: 773

join my new taglist here!

Rafe pulled up to the Boneyard with a sigh. He was no stranger to this place, sure, but he was so used to being with you at these times when you would drink too much and end up being driven home in his truck. This time was different.

He had received a call from your phone, not from your friends but Kie. She had found you puking behind a log alone which sounded funny had it been anyone but you.

Your so called 'friends' from figure eight had ditched you. Rafe knew they were bitches but you ever with a golden heart had ignored his warnings, excited by their invite to a girls night meaning he could not accompany you. Now, he regretted it.

"Where is she?" He asked approaching the only person apart from you and Kie in attendance that he could mildly stand, Sarah.

She simply pointed to an area of the beach separate from the party, he appreciated that Kie had removed you from prying eyes who would no doubt speak of the Kook Princess' inability to hold alcohol tomorrow had they seen.

"Fucking finally, she wont stop crying." Kiara said, not out of anger but worry. He glanced down at you seeing you curled up in Kie's arms, eyes glassy and red, cheeks stained with tears.

"Hey baby." He said ever so gently, kneeling down to your level in the sand and no doubt ruining his expensive chinos.

"Rafe?" You whispered peeling your head from Kie's shoulder as you dared to take in your surroundings.

"Yeah it's me, you good?" He asked, lifting a hand to remove the strands of sweaty hair which had stuck to your forehead, the humidity of the Outer Banks mixing with your illness making your body ever so slightly too warm.

"No I-, I don't feel well and I can't breathe properly." You hiccupped, anxiety making your heartbeat uneasy. Your hands reached for his ironed black shirt and he let you scrunch it between your fingers, grounding your mind.

Rafe nodded at Kiara, letting her know she could leave with a silent thank you.

"Think you had too much to drink?" He asked, watching as you messily nodded in response. "You'll feel better soon then, yeah? I see you got most of it out already." He chuckled, knowing you had been sick multiple times between this moment and his phone call from Kie.

"Just wanna go home." You mumbled, leaning into his warm chest.

"Okay lets get you up then." He said standing up and taking you with him as you stumbled on your feet. "Lean against me okay? Good girl." He added as you did so. The name was comforting and soft, sure it was sometimes used during sex but in this moment it was more. Reassurance.

He supported you all the way to his truck where he buckled you in with a gentle kiss to your scrunched and rosy cheeks.

"I don't want you speaking to those girls again." He said, hands clenched around the steering wheel while his jaw clicked in place though his anger was not directed at you.

"What Kie and Sarah?" You slurred, "They helped me though." You finished as your eyes squinted beneath the street lights which flickered as you passed.

"No, no. I'd rather you talk to my fuckin' psycho sister at this point I'm talking about those Figure Eight bitches." He seethed making your head snap towards him.

"Number one, they're my friends, number two, you're also a Figure Eight bitch, no?" You giggled to yourself, knowing deep inside that his anger was justified to an extent. They weren't your friends, not really.

"They're not baby, you're kind and sensitive they're stuck up and have no personality outside of generational wealth." He replied. You saw the irony in his words though it appeared he didn't and it wasn't a hill you were ready to die on so you let it go.

"M'kay well, I feel better now you're here and I didn't like them all that much anyway I'm just surprised they would stoop that low." You sighed into the silent atmosphere as the car, feeling his gaze on you.

He softly placed a hand on your bare thigh in the darkness, squeezing it in a gesture of comfort.

"Yeah." He sighed in defeat.

In this moment, looking at you in the moonlight Rafe felt a new sense of protectiveness over you. You were naïve and too forgiving to your own detriment, he wasn't and if he could help it those girls would never see the light of day again, never mind your beautiful face.

[miguelhugger2099]

Omg first off LOVE!!! your wiring literally *chef’s kiss* imagine Miguel x reader suggestive smut where they’ve been both super busy and haven’t had time for each other and tension has been building up to this point.

Worth the Wait

nonie im gonna sob. not only was i so excited to see you be my first ask, this is also my first ever written smut!! aaaa im so nervous so please have mercy !! i jumped on my laptop as soon as i saw this and its so late right now haha im a little tired but i didnt want you to wait at all !! im not sure if i wrote too much or too little lol regardless i really hope you enjoy and if not i'm more than happy to make something else and thank you sososo much for the compliment <3333 the ask wasnt specified if it was fem!reader or not so i made it gn!reader just in case <3 Miguel x GN!Reader, Smut, too embarrassed to proofread it, Word Count: 3,681

“Hey, Miguel, do you think you could stay late tonight? Boss wants you in the lab for testing.” A short woman popped her head in his room, her hair neatly tucked in a high bun. Miguel stopped his pacing in his office, his glasses lifted on his head using it as a headband to pull back his fringe. He placed the beakers in his hands down and took off his gloves while ruby eyes glanced at the clock on the wall. He was supposed to leave in a couple minutes.

Miguel’s eyebrows scrunched up, tsking under his breath and turning to look at the woman. “Can’t someone else be there? Peter can oversee it instead.” He pleaded, exasperated. She gave him a sympathetic look and sighed.

“Sorry, Miguel. He specifically asked for you.” Not wanting to be the bearer of bad news anymore, she slipped out the door and shut it behind her, leaving Miguel to groan and slump his shoulders. He stared up at the ceiling and closed his eyes, breathing in and out to calm his anger. It seemed like these days all he ever did was overtime at work. He fiddled with the golden band around his left ring finger, his other hand twirling it mindlessly for some comfort and also a silent apology to you.

His heart ached as he made his way to his desk, picking up his phone and dialing your number. He licked his lips while he brought the phone up to his ear. Miguel wasn’t prepared to hear your voice, happy and hopeful and only be met with disappointment.

“Miggy?” You answer happily. A small smile forms on Miguel’s face.

“H-hey, baby. You doing alright?” He asked, taking a seat on his swivel chair and leaning back to stare at the photo of you two on his desktop.

“Yeah! Yeah, I’m finishing up dinner. Are you on your way home?”

Miguel’s smile dropped a bit, realizing once more why he had called in the first place. “Um, about that, mi corazón. I have to–”

“You have to stay the night, don’t you?” You cut him off, disappointment evident in your voice. Miguel’s heart clenched at the sound.

“I…I do. Believe me, I don’t have a choice or I’d be there in a heartbeat.”

“It’s okay, really. I’m not mad or anything. This month has been hectic for both of us. I just… I just miss you is all.” You speak softly over the phone. He missed you more. He wanted to be there.

“Lo siento, bebé. You know how much I hate being away from you.” He apologized. “How about tomorrow, huh? I have off. We can go out and get a drink. Or maybe stay home? I know how much you love my cooking.” He offered, his heart beating faster at the thought of spending time with you again. That feeling sank when he heard you let out a quick puff of air in annoyance.

“I can’t. I’m working this weekend. Six days in a row,” You rolled your eyes just thinking about it. Your job always had a way of pushing your buttons. Miguel’s jaw clenched as he heard you. Miguel never really liked this recent event of work taking up his time from seeing you. He hated it even more when your job took you away from him. “God, I really thought we’d have tonight together at least.”

Miguel was quick to reassure you. “Hey, hey. Listen. We’ll have a day together. Eventually there’ll be a day for just us–all about us, I promise.”

When Miguel had arrived home, it could barely be even classified as night time with the way the sun had been peeking through the horizon. He dragged his body through the door, a cold home awaiting him. After kicking off his shoes, he dumped his coat and bag on the floor and made his way to the kitchen, eating the leftovers of the dinner you two were supposed to eat together before trudging back to bed. He saw you lying there on your side and he felt exhaustion drag him down.

Miguel slipped in under the covers beside you after striping himself of his clothes, leaving him in his underwear and slipped his arm around you. He pressed your body flushed against his, Miguel’s larger body enveloping yours protectively. His nose buried itself in your neck, his lips grazing your shoulder. His hand rubbed your stomach and then slid up to rub up and down your waist. Sneakily, he ran his hand under your shirt while his lips left small kisses on your neck and shoulder. You stirred awake as you felt the sudden touch of someone else.

Miguel felt you move so he pulled you tighter to him, keeping you caged in that position. “Mig…?” You called out sleepily. You felt something poke you from behind and groaned. Miguel continued to kiss your neck, his teeth coming out to gently nip at the skin making you shiver. He simply hummed his response.

“‘M home.” He murmured. He slowly turned you on your back, towering over you slightly with your leg between his. Miguel’s arm rested by your head while his attacks became more intimate. You leaned your head back, allowing him more access and his other hand on your hip squeezed you in appreciation. You bent your leg up on the bed slightly, your knee caressing his growing bulge in his boxers. Miguel let out a low groan, his hips grinding on you for some friction.

Your hands finally reached up to his hair, curling your fingers around his soft wavy brown locks. Miguel took this as an opportunity to capture your lips with his, muting the soft moans you were letting out. His own knee spread your legs apart, rubbing in between them to add to your pleasure. You felt a jolt of pleasure run down your spine, bucking your hips up instinctively. Miguel sighed against you, his hand on that had been gripping your hip, moved down to the hem of your pajama pants. He teasingly pulled it down, letting it snap back to your body and making you whine. You felt him grin through your kiss. Cheeky bastard.

Before he could ease his hand down your pants, your alarm had blared through the room, shocking the both of you and separating yourselves off each other. Miguel scowled while you clambered up to grab your phone. “The hell was that?” He grunted, displeased with being interrupted. You fumbled with turning it off, placing a hand on your chest to calm your fast beating heart.

“My alarm. I have a morning shift.” You moaned, tossing your phone back on the counter and standing up from the bed. Miguel blinked twice before getting up with you. He reached out his hand to grab yours in an attempt to stop you.

“Woah, woah, hey–what’s the rush?” He asked, turning you around and cupping your cheek. “We can at least have these couple minutes, can’t we?” His voice dropped an octave, leaning down to press a kiss on your cheek. Miguel tried to kiss downwards but you stopped him, albeit unwillingly.

“Amor, you know damn well how Nueva York’s traffic is in the morning. I’m not gonna be late and get my ass in trouble ‘cause you can’t keep it in your pants.” You slipped from his arms with a playful roll of your eyes and walked to the kitchen. Miguel scoffed, slightly offended, his eyes watching you walk away and looking down at your ass.

“Don’t act like you weren’t enjoying it.” He grumbled, looking down at the tent in his boxers wondering what to do with it now.

For the next week, it had been nothing but just pure torture. With the month making you and Miguel work away from each other, this week was stretching that limit. When Miguel worked in the morning, you’d work at night and vice versa. Each time without fail, you managed to slip in a few teasing touches. Waking up Miguel by sitting on his lap and peppering kisses on his cheeks with his hands grinding your hips down on his hardening cock. Miguel cupping your ass and giving it a squeeze when you came home from work while he was on his way out. Both of you were on the brink of breaking by this point. These small acts were supposed to tame the fire within you, not burn it brighter.

Eventually, it was finally your day off after a long weekend. A break from customer service and passing out as soon as you got home. Miguel had work today but he texted earlier that he’d get off on the hour he was supposed to this time around. You felt bad. He’d been working so hard and today had been no different. He took a shift earlier than usual so he could come home earlier without anyone being there to suddenly ask for him to stay. Lord knows he’s pushing those forty hours into overtime.

From the bedroom, you heard the door open, keys jingling as it was turned to unlock it. You got up from the bed and peered out the door, seeing Miguel kicking off his shoes and coat while tossing his bag carelessly on the living room chair. “Welcome home.” You greeted him. He dragged his feet closer to you with his head down, the top buttons on his white button up were popped open, exposing a glimpse of his collarbone. Miguel immediately wraps his arms around you, pulling you in for a comforting hug. You followed suit, hugging him back since you sensed he probably had a rough day. He hummed in response, settling for resting his chin on your head. You stayed like that for a while just holding one another until you felt his hand run under your shirt to feel your soft skin against his calloused hands. They continued up and up your spine until your shirt was lifting up with him. “Miguel.”

“What?” He grumbled. One hand slid down under your pants, getting a quick feel of your ass and pulling your pelvis to him. You gasped and tightened your hold around him, feeling the warmth of arousal ignite in your stomach. “I need to have you. I can’t wait any longer.” His soft touching became more possessive, roughly grabbing your ass and tugging on your shirt and pants.

“Miguel.” You repeated his name, this time in a whimper. Your own hands slipped down his collared shirt and lightly scratched your nails on his large back which made him shiver. He pulled back and you saw his eyes hazed with desire, pupils blown wide.

“Please…” He whispered, his lips brushing up against yours. Your hands fell to his buttoned shirt as you looked up at him. Your heart raced in your chest–the sheer want of having you all to himself finally after weeks was too good to pass up. You nodded and the pleading look on Miguel’s face dropped as he immediately bent down to kiss you. You let out a squeak of surprise between his lips right before giving into his needs and kissing him back.

He tugged your pants down to your ankles before lifting you out of the puddle of clothes and bringing you to the bed. Once you were laid on top, you watched Miguel fumble with his belt. His large hands quickly unhooked the metal making it chime and the soft zipping sound of the leather sliding out his belt loops. He practically ripped himself free from his clothes, not even unbuttoning his shirt and just lifted it up and off his torso. You saw his girthy length, standing tall and proud with a slight red color tinged at his tip while the rest of him was a slighter darker color than his skin. His tip was already oozing with precum. A sight you had always welcomed. It became clear to you that Miguel had been thinking about this for a while–maybe all day. Miguel crawled on top of you, helping you out of your shirt and underwear and kissing you again while his hands roamed your body.

“I’ve waited so long. Did you miss me like how I missed you, cariño?” He sighed between your lips. Your hands clutched his shoulders, one leg hooking around his waist.

“Always.” You whimpered back.

“On your knees. Now.” He growled. You felt your heart skip a beat, another heartbeat going straight to your core. Stumbling, you got off your back and got on your hands and knees like Miguel wanted. This position has always made you flustered. It was both embarrassing and exhilarating not seeing what Miguel could do to you, or even get to put your hands on him–solely relying on feeling.

Perfect timing, his hands met your ass, grabbing them and massaging them. “So perfect,” He murmured. His finger grazed your aching hole where you were the most sensitive, purposefully teasing the nerves on your body. He took pleasure in the way you writhed beneath him, succumbing to his hand. His thick cock rubbed up against you, smearing his leaking fluid on you for even better access. Then ever so slowly, gliding in his fat weeping tip inside and penetrating your walls.

You both moaned in unison. The feeling of being stuffed was like finally feeling that last puzzle piece snap in place. “Uff, fuck–I’ve missed you,” He groaned, his breath shaking as he leaned over your body. His one hand held the headboard in front of him while his other hand held the plushness of your hip tightly. Miguel’s body was shaking as he entered you slowly, stretching you out after a long time of not seeing each other like this. You whimpered, falling from your hands onto your elbows as you shook with him. “Ease up, cariño, así es.” He praised, leaning back to watch his cock disappear inside you. His pride swelled at how easily he seemed to slide in you even after so long, his mouth curling into a sly smirk.

“Mi–guel…” You choked out a moan. You whined and gripped the pillow underneath your head tightly in your fists. You had forgotten just how huge Miguel was, his covered bulge was nothing compared to the real thing. Panting, you heard your heartbeat in your ears, turning your head to rest your cheek on the pillow.

Miguel’s hand left the headboard by this point, choosing instead to rest on your back, running down the curve of your spine to press your head down. You whimpered and clenched around him which made him let out a string of curses under his breath. You felt him push himself to the hilt, his balls gently smacking against the curve of your ass. He groaned, his hand on your head gripped your hair to still himself from pounding you immediately. The two of you stood there, breathing heavily while you felt each other. You could feel him throbbing inside you, twitching ever so softly. Miguel bit his lip to hinder himself from cumming on the spot with your walls convulsing around him, weakly attempting to suck him in deeper.

You wiggled your hips, bucking them back against Miguel with a pathetic whine. “M-move…plea–” You got cut off when Miguel slipped out of you, and then he slammed back inside making you scream and shake. He then began a steady pace, enough for movement but not as quick as you wanted. Still, you mewled and clutched at the sheets while his cock was ravaging your guts. The hand on your hip wrapped around your lower stomach, his bicep flexing as he held your weight up to fuck your from behind.

“Too long. It’s been too fucking long since I’ve fucked this needy hole properly.” Miguel sighed, huffing with each thrust of his hips. Your eyes rolled back and your jaw slacked open. Skin slapping echoed in the room along with the wet smack of sweat between your bodies. It was a symphony of lust and desire. An aching instinct to be reunited like this. You pleaded for more–a little quicker, a little harder– and Miguel who loved you so much didn’t want to deny either of you this ecstasy. He then used both hands to grab onto your hips and started to drag your body back and forth on his dick, drilling himself in you like a toy. Miguel used up all his frustrations of not being able to see you all this time, his eyes drinking in your writhing form while he bucked into you abandonly.

“Yes! Yes! Fuck–Miguel…!” You squealed, involuntarily squeezing him which made me grunt and buck his hips faster. You babbled nonsense while your core bubbled up the feeling of an orgasm. You screwed your eyes shut as you allowed Miguel to hump against you. He leaned over you again, pressing kisses on your back, murmuring things you could barely hear over the sound of your own moans.

Suddenly, Miguel had pulled out again leaving you feeling empty and light headed while the feeling of an impending orgasm disappeared. He let go of you, your hips bouncing on the bed without the support of his strength holding you up. You opened up your eyes, glazed with pleasure and shakily tried to look behind you. Before you could, Miguel took your body and flipped you on your back. It all happened quickly before you could even register what was happening. He took your legs and tugged your body closer to him like a ragdoll. He spread them wide then pressed them up against your chest. You lolled your head up and you saw his fringe had fallen to his forehead, sticking to it with his sweat. His chest was heaving up and down, the glow of the moonlight highlighting the carvings of his muscles perfectly–it made your breath hitch.

Miguel then loomed over you, nuzzling his head into your neck again. You leaned your head to the side making him gain more access to you. His teeth bit your soft flesh, his lips suckling your skin to leave tiny bruises along the side. “Ah–” You squirmed and gasped when you felt Miguel slide back into you again. You quickly wrapped your arms around him, your hand running through his already messy hair. You pressed his head closer, your eyes opening up hazily to stare at the ceiling while Miguel starts his pace again.

“So tight, just f’me, hm? You have no idea how much–” He moaned in between speaking, the lust clouding his mind. “H-how much I needed you. I should’ve just brought you to work, bend you over my desk and fuck you however long I want,” He shuddered at the thought, his hips stuttering while you whimpered and arched your back off the bed. “Oh, you like that?” He grinned, his voice oozing with arrogance. You nodded, your eyes shutting closed again and desperately lifting your hips to match his thrusting.

“Next time, bebé, next time. I promise. You’re doing so, so, good. You feel so good.” He slurred softly, his hips snapped harder, his cock twitching and swelling inside you.

“Mig–Mig–I can’t,” You moaned, your screams getting louder the harder Miguel went. “Oh, god, Miguel!” Miguel kissed you, swallowing all your moans while he slipped his tongue in your mouth. Your eyes rolled back and your legs wrapped around his waist the moment he let go of your thighs. His hands traveled around your body, feeling the shape of your silhouette back into his memory. He grabbed at anything he could hold onto before curling around your ass for a small squeeze.

He pulled away from the kiss, breaths mingling for a moment until Miguel rested his forehead on your shoulder. Your hands raked down his back and you dug your nails into his giant back, leaving streaks of red in their wake from scratching him. He moaned from it–the pain only adding to his pleasure-fueled mind. Miguel peppered kisses on your shoulder, making his way down to your chest.

“Miguel, I’m so close–so, so close…” You whimpered.

“I know, ángel, me… me too. Solo enfocate en mí, hm? Just let me have you.” He pleaded, his rough moans turning into whimpering as he neared his end. You responded with a weak ‘uh-huh’ then clinging onto Miguel for support.

He murmured in a jumble of Spanish and English, his breath hot on your neck while you screamed and pleaded for more, how good it felt, anything to get both of you going. Miguel lifted your lower half up, relentlessly pounding into you while he cursed lowly, burying his head in your shoulder again. You felt the bubble in your abdomen about to snap.

“Miguel, I–!” You tried warning him but instead the waves of your orgasm flooded your body, cumming on Miguel and making a mess between your legs. You twitched around him, milking his cock for all it’s worth. Your legs shook until you went limp, fucked out of your mind. Miguel whined, speeding up to catch his own release.

“Fuck–!” He moaned, feeling his cock pump out his creamy fat load inside you, painting your walls white. Miguel’s entire body tensed up, stilling up against you while he slowly came down from the high. His strokes gradually slowed down, pumping the final ropes of cum, while he softened inside you, huffing and puffing with you. He shakily but carefully pulled out of you after a few moments. You whimpered when he completely left you with a soft wet shlick.

Miguel fell beside you, exhausted and spent. Still, he reached for you, bringing your shivering body in his arms. You curled yourself in his chest weakly, feeling his hand play with your hair. He kissed your forehead, basking in each other's afterglow. He brought the covers up over you two for some extra warmth.

“I’ll…get us cleaned up in the morning…” He huffed with a tired smile. You grunted in response, too numb to speak but satisfied nonetheless.

can you tell this is my first smut? hahaaaa dontanswerthatillcry

[alvfr]

hey I saw you're open to requests and I'm so obsessed with your "Accidents" series with Hotch x Reader! I totally get you're taking a break from it atm so feel free to ignore but I'd love a drabble or whatever you're comfortable writing/sharing from the series? Maybe like a snapshot of when they were still figuring things out before they crossed that line or became established.

Thanks so much!

A/N: Aah, it's been so long since I've written for Hotch so I hope I managed something at least. I really tried to keep this short-ish and more of a drabble, but yeah, this would be set after the shower-scene in "Elevators" but before the bonus-part, I guess. Not super exciting maybe, but good practice for me. cw: none? sfw. awkward phone call. fem bau!reader, no use of y/n, part of "accidents" wc: 1.3k

Call me maybe

The first time Hotch called you was around eight in the evening, the day after your team got back from the conference in Florida. While you could not say you had been expecting it — a pessimistic part of you always expected the worst case scenario — your body told a different tale. Every inch of you had buzzed with anticipation since you stepped foot in your own apartment. Making sure to keep your phone charged and unmuted for a change, going as far as keeping it within sight when taking a shower and still checking it religiously every few minutes in case you had missed something. 

You argued with yourself, scolding yourself for waiting around like a lovesick schoolgirl and then berating yourself for doubting his word in the first place. He had said he would call and Hotch did not lie so why were you getting so worked up? 

When the day dragged on, without even paperwork to distract yourself with, you spiraled into increasingly worse scenarios as to why he had not called. He had been called into work, he had lost his phone, he had forgot his charger, he was discovered he was under surveillance by some shady government officials. Or something had happened to him, or to someone he cared about, or something had happened to both him and someone he cared about. Or, and this was simultaneously the best and worst one, he had changed his mind.

So when the call came that night, you had worked yourself into a bit of a frenzy and jumped at the sound of your own ring tone. The display glowed with the name 'A. Hotchner' and you forgot all about basic human behavior, like blinking or even breathing. 

It rang three times before your body bypassed your meddlesome mind and you picked up with the standard greeting of your last name, just in case he was under surveillance somehow. A theory that gained traction with every loaded second where you could not hear anything from the other side.

“Hotch?” you asked and held the phone out to check if the call was still active. In your state, you would not have been all that surprised to find if you had hallucinated the whole thing. “You there?”

“Yes.” The smooth sound of his voice sent rivers of idyll into your veins while your heart threatened to pound out of your skull. “Sorry. Hi.”

A stupid grin overtook your face and you twirled the still-connected charger cable with your fingers before catching yourself. Dropping the cable, you cleared both your throat and face. “Hi.” 

“Hi. Sorry, is this a bad time?”

“No, it’s good.” 

You tried to avoid looking at the mess of your apartment, all chores neglected for the day in case you wound up missing his call. In truth, you’d drop everything in a heartbeat and come over if he asked, although you had no idea where he lived. 

“I mean, I can talk?” You winced at how you had managed to phrase it as a question and cleared your throat again. “What’s up?”

And the award for worst conversationalist goes to this girl right here, you thought with a hefty roll of your eyes. What’s up? What were you, fourteen years old and trying to impress your friend’s older brother?

“Not much,” Hotch admitted from his side of the line and you thought you could detect a hint of gratitude in there. “Just finished up some overdue paperwork.”

“San Joaquin county?” you guessed, knowing without a doubt how much paperwork that case still generated. 

“Parts of it, yes. There’s also the budgets, protocols and various administration memos I’m forced to have an opinion on.” A slight pause and you caught a slight intake of breath on his side. “I didn’t call to talk about work.”

You forced yourself to keep your breaths slow and controlled instead of shivering as you knew they’d be. “Okay.”

“How are you?” The tenderness in his voice wreaked havoc with your inner organs and you could imagine his expression. The tilt to his eyebrows that matched the tilt of his jaw where he looked up, resting his eyes on whatever was near the ceiling to the left of him. “You get home okay?”

“Safe and sound. You?”

“All in one piece.” 

A silence stretched on for an uncomfortable few heartbeats and you wracked your brain for something worthwhile to say. It was uncharted territory to talk to him casually like this. No time crunch forcing you to keep the small talk to a minimum and no risk of getting caught forcing you to speak in code. Neither did your forte lay in phone calls and, as the profiler you were, you wished you could have had his facial expressions and mannerisms to reveal more of his thoughts during the conversation. The same probably went for him, you realized and it made you breathe a little easier.

“What did you think of the conference?” he asked just as you were about to say something completely different.

“Uh…” Your brain did a full reboot to no avail. “Are you asking about the actual conference or—”

“The actual conference,” he clarified and you thought you could hear the smile in his voice. “Did you catch the mass-shooting response training?”

“I did and it was okay, I guess, even if it felt a little dated.” You wandered around in your apartment, needing to get rid of the built-up excess energy. “Doesn’t this count as work talk though?”

“You’re right. Sorry, I’m,” you heard something brushing against the microphone, maybe him dragging a hand over his forehead, “not very good at this. I, uh, wanted to call to reiterate that I fully understand if you’ve changed your mind about this.”

“I haven’t.”

The words came out faster than you had anticipated, some part of you determined to deny him any possibility of doubt. 

“I’m really glad you called, Hotch.” You did a few test-runs at yourself in the mirror and corrected yourself to: “Aaron.”

“Good. I’ve been working up the nerve to do so for the past hour.”

Again, you could imagine his expression. The slight secretive smile, his head now tilted downward, exposing more of his neck to the room.

“Well, I’ve been waiting for it since I got home last night.” You tried to match his unabashed honesty, the need to convince him that you wanted this still present. “If that makes you feel any better.”

“A little,” he murmured and you could almost feel how he settled in wherever he was, maybe lounging back against the couch or chair, getting comfortable and the phone scratched again as he shifted it around. “What kind of movies do you like?”

The question blindsided you and you blinked at your own reflection in the mirror. “Uh, I’m omnivorous really. Why?”

“I’m looking through the show times for Friday night. I was hoping you would like to go see a movie with me, if we don’t get a case.”

“Oh.” Your stupid grin returned tenfold and you absentmindedly twirled the charging cable again. “Well, then I really like the movie that is playing this Friday night.”

In the end, you settled for a title and time, both of which would be rescheduled over and over again because of a case getting in the way. It took you a month to go see a movie together, but it did not really matter. By then, you had talked on the phone every night you were off a case (and sometimes he called you from a hotel room that were just a few doors down the hall from yours to say good night when you were on a case.) A torturous slow pace, maybe, but well worth it in your opinion.

-----

Thank you for the request!

If you want to read the rest of the series, it is on AO3 here (E-rated)

Let me know if you liked it, thank you for reading ❤️

[pyramid-of-starrs]

10 from your kinktober list please! 🥰🥰

Plan B

Kinktober request: 10 Fuckboy Mingi, Breeding

Pairing: Fuckboy Mingi x Fem reader

Summary: You and your best friend Hongjoong go to Wooyoungs annual Halloween party, when you're alone you spot your ex and run into a new person instead.

Word Count: 5K

Kink: Breeding kink

Warning: Breeding, toxic guy behavior, plan B mentioned.

A/N: Idk why I made this super long but enjoy lol, I wanna finish up my kinktober request!

Minors dni

"'Scuse me, what kinda candy is in that box? My mommy says I can pick whatever candy for da trick or treaters!" A cute little girl dressed as a princess asked you. You looked down at her slightly startled by her when she tugged your jacket. You stood awkwardly and looked at her and back at the small blue box in your hand, and it definitely wasn't candy, it was a plan B.

"O-oh no... um it's a special adult candy you take after an oopsie with a boy they should have never oopsied with." You said, why on earth didn't you just say no? Your brain was just scrambled after the party from last, while it was amazing there was absolutely some mistakes made in the process of living your best life.

...

You got a text from your best friend Hongjoong about making sure to be ready by 10pm so he could pick you up to go to Wooyoungs annual Halloween party, the best party of the year everyone at your college raved about it. This year you wanted to be sexy but cool and chose to be D.va from overwatch, the bodycon spandex suit showing off your perfect ass and plump breast, you were bound to catch someone’s eye. Your phone rang at 9:43pm and you answered knowing exactly who it was. "I'm coming out now." You said then hung up, you grabbed your jacket and put on your boots and met Hongjoong at his car and got in the front. Once inside you saw him dressed a simple vampire.

"What the fuck Joong, I thought we were being sexy and cool." You said taking off your bunny ears so you could comfortably fit in the car.

"Vampires are sexy and cool, what the hell even is your costume?" he asked as he pulled off.

"I'm D.va from overwatch, thank you." You rolled your eyes.

"What the hell is overwatch??" His eyes darting around in confusion.

"Whatever it doesn't matter if you recognize me, as long as the hoes get it."

"Oh god here we go again with this hoes thing, you've been saying you were going to do a one-night stand with someone and never do cause you're still all hung up over Jongh-"

"HE WHO SHALL NOT BE NAMED." You interrupted him and said, you didn't want to spend another one of your nights sad about your ex Jongho.

"Fine, we're here anyways." Hongjoong parked a bit away from the packed party, you two exited the car and walked to the house party ready for an eventful night. Once inside you paid the entry fee and looked around to see everyone in their costumes and having fun drinking, dancing, smoking and socializing.

"Hongjoong, Y/N, you made it! " A familiar voice said, you both looked over to see the man of the hour Wooyoung dressed as a very sexy Harry potter, fuck if Hongjoong didn't make you follow his new dumb rule of not being allowed to date his friends after the break up with Jongho you would have fucked Wooyoung right then and there. He patted Hongjoongs back and hugged you leaving a pleasant smell of his cologne in the air, his eyes traveled up and down your body. "Lemme guess, D.va? Overwatch?”

Your face got hot, and you felt a bit shy under his gaze. “Yeah, do you play?”

“Kinda, my bro San plays more than me but if hot girls like yourself like you or online then I’ll absolutely be getting on more often” he said winking at you. Hongjoong looked at you two and noticed the tension and rolled his eyes and grabbed your hand.

“Yeah, anyways bro we’re going to grab a drink.” Hongjoong started pulling you away and Wooyoung giggled and waved.

“Bye Y/N.”

“Bye Wooyoung” you gave him a goofy little smile and continued to be pulled to the kitchen.

“Remember the fucking Rule Y/N! I want friends that have never seen you naked.” He pulled you two in front of the punch bowl of jungle juice and started making you both a cup of the mix of liquor and juice.

“I know Hongjoong I know.” You took the cup from him and started to drink with him you both pulled the cup from your lips and made a face.

“Jesus fucking Christ is that just sugar and liquor” Hongjoong said as his face was still twisted you both laughed.

Another person laughed and you both looked up to see Seonghwa dressed as Tom Nook from animal crossing.

“Hwa hey!” You walked over to hug him.

Hongjoong just smiled a bit and waved. Seonghwa was Wooyoungs friend from high school that you and Hongjoong met a few times and Hongjoong had the hugest crush on him. You smirked at him averting his eyes and his ears turning red.

“You too look adorable by the way.” Seonghwa said after hugging you back.

“Thank you Hwa, I think Hongjoong makes a very handsome Vampire, amiright?” You looked over at him shooting you daggers.

“Oh absolutely, you look really good in a cape Joong.” He smiled at the shorter male.

Hongjoong averted his eyes again and rubbed his neck. “Ah, thanks you look nice too…”

“I hope I don’t look nice enough to bite.” Seonghwa bit his lip then looked up at Hongjoong while taking a sip of his drink. You had a cocky grin because you’ve been trying to get Hongjoong to make a move. Hongjoong awkwardly laughed and you covered your face with your cup to hide your 2nd hand embarrassment.

“Well, I’m gonna go scout the scene.” You said trying to be anywhere but there and to give them some space.

“Oh, I’ll come with-“

“No! I gotta be alone to find the cute guys Joong, you’ll scare the hoes” you and Seonghwa laughed, and you walked away and deeper into the party. As you scoped the scene you noticed a pretty good variety of guys but no one that caught your eyes. But then your heart dropped at the worse possible scenario when you reached the back rooms. In the sea of people, you saw a purple head of hair that made your chest puff in and out with anxiety, why him and why here? There Jongho was dressed in his normal clothes with bear ears, he wasn't big on dressing up for Halloween or parties so to seem him standing in the corner with his arm around the waist of another girl. Your heart pounded and your breath was short, you wanted to escape him, wanted to escape this room, escape feeling sad and crying about him. Watching him flirt and touch girls hurt you a bit. You bit your lip to hold back the tears but started to fail. Jongho looked up from his conversation to see you fighting back your emotions and stealing glances of him. He told the girl to give him a second and started making his way over to you. You panicked seeing him coming and quickly wiped your eyes and ran out the room.

You pushed pass the party goers just looking for somewhere to go, you went upstairs into one of the bedrooms and quickly slammed the door. You back away looking at the door hoping that he didn't find you then you bump into something. When you turned around you jumped seeing you didn't bump into something you bumped into someone.

"Oh my god I'm so sorry, is this your room ?" you said apologetically.

The tall silent man dressed as Gojo from jujitsu kaisen just stood there and chuckled.

"You're good, yeah this is my room, did you need something? You know you're pretty far from the party, I even turned my light off so no one would find me." The man said.

Now that you checked your surroundings you realized the bedroom was dark and only lit by the moonlight outside, the party music could barely be heard since the room was in the back of the house. Once you finished scanning the surroundings you finally get a good look at the man whose room you invaded. You got a bit shy when your eyes panned up his tall frame to notice the fairly handsome man with grey hair and black glasses sitting on his forehead to complete his cosplay.

"I hope you're staring because I look good and not because you think I look lame." he said shaking you out of your thought.

"No! You look good, like really good, you're Gojo right?" you asked.

"Oh, I love a woman that knows her anime, and video games." His eyes traced over your figure as he studied your costume along with the way the cosplay hugged your body in all the right places. "Yeah, you'll absolutely do for the night." he whispered to himself lowly. "So, what brings you up to my room?"

"Well, it's kinda dumb but I was running... from my ex." you said embarrassed now that you heard how ridiculous that sounded.

"Damn I get that, I'm Mingi by the way." Mingi said reaching out his hand.

"I'm Y/N" You shook his large hand.

“I was just about to head down but since I have someone with me now you wanna stay in chill with me? I got some real liquor here." He smiled slyly then took a seat on his slightly messy bed he reached next to him and grabbed the bottle of tequila sitting next to his bed, your heart thumped a bit but then you remembered you were here with someone.

"I think I have to check on my friend though, let me text them to see where he is." you pulled out your phone to text Hongjoong then realized he actually texted you 10 minutes ago.

Hongjoong: Hey, Seonghwa wanted to see my studio I built so I took him. Tell Woo to give you a ride home and don't fuck him. Call me when you're home.

You chuckled at the text knowing that Hongjoong was going to have a nice long night. "Never mind, I guess I can hang for a bit" You sat down on the bed a bit further then him. He looked over to see you sitting far and laughed.

"I won't bite unless you tell me too doll, sit closer." He waved you to come closer with his two long fingers and you inched a bit closer, not moving by much. "Some more" you got a bit closer again. "More." he smiled as he grabbed two solo red cups to pour shots for the both of you. When you still barely moved Mingi decided to take matters into his own hands, he put the cups on the floor and hooked his arm around your waist to pull you in. You were sitting thigh to thigh at that point, your face was hot. "Much better." He grabbed the cups again and handed you yours.

"I-I didn't know you meant this close." You said shyly.

"Of course, pretty girl like you I would want right next to me, lucky I didn't pull you in my lap." he winked then held his cup next to your to do a quick cheers to take the shot. You tap his cup then you both chugged down the alcohol. The burning in your chest was strong as the bitter taste sat on your tongue and throat. Mingi took out his phone and played some hip-hop and RnB at a low volume. You both took more shots and sat and talked more as the night progressed. The party downstairs was still going but it started to die down as more chill music was playing downstairs as well. The more liquor you drank the more you remembered why you didn't drink tequila straight. Your pussy was throbbing and sitting alone with this beautiful man, his deep voice and his plump and soft looking lips didn't help. You've known Wooyoung a whole year and was wondering where he was hiding this fine ass man this whole time. The burning between your legs got worse the more you listened to him talk and you tried to rub your thighs together a bit to cool it, your eyes kept drifting to his lips and Mingi noticed you losing attention and fidgeting.

"You okay Y/N?" He smiled at you, and it fueled the fire burning below.

"You're like... really sexy Mingi." You both laughed at your sudden remark.

"Oh really? What's sexy about me?" Mingi said in his deep voice as he finished what was in his cup.

"Your voice, your face, anime, video game knowledge, I bet you get lots of girls."

"Nah not really. People look at Woo and the rest of our friends but not really me." Mingi replied, that was a lie of course, no girl in their right mind would pass up a 6'1 man that has Mingis face, but you didn't need to know that.

"Whaaat? No way you're so damn sexy Mingi I would be all over you if I was them." You said also finishing your cup, the liquid courage you had was getting you in some trouble tonight.

"All over me doing what exactly?" He grabbed your chin and brought your face closer, the smell of tequila fresh on both of you, Mingi had an agenda tonight for sure, He was going to go down to the party after pregaming with a few other girls that just left his room but once he turned off his desk light and was about to head down you came in. No need to go looking for pussy when it walked right up to him.

You both looked into each other’s lustful eyes as Mingi bit his pillowy soft lips. "Whatever you tell me too." was all you could say, a cocky grin spread across Mingis face, he had you right where he wanted you.

"Oh, really baby?" he asked, you eagerly nodded as you got closer to him wanting to taste his lips. Mingi saw how needy you were and decided not to make you wait anymore, he brought your lips closer until they connected, the kissed tasted bittersweet from the liquor and chasers you both had been consuming in your time spent together. The kiss was literally intoxicating, your head spun as he took the lead, his large hands moving to your thighs to grip your flesh in your spandex suit, you could feel the heat between your legs getting more needy for his touch. You decided to do the same and palm Mingi over his black cargo pants he was wearing to get a feel of his hard member. You couldn't really believe what you were feeling, you assumed it was either his pants or Mingi was hung, his steadily growing dick was already thick but as it got bigger in your pants your heart started to race in excitement. Mingi pulled back from the kiss and smiled at you.

"How about you get on your knees and feel what your grabbing baby." He said, you nodded again and moved to the floor, Mingi spread his long legs so you could slot yourself between them. He pulled his pants down a bit then his underwear until his dick happily sprung out in front of you. You were stunned, this easily was the biggest dick you've seen, it was girthy and had an overly generous amount of length to it.

"Holy shit you're big everywhere." You said to yourself by Mingi overheard you and laughed. He gripped your hair with one hand and gripped his dick with the other hand.

"Well let's see how much you can fit in that pretty little mouth baby." he pulled your head down on to his length and you immediately gagged, and he let your hair go to allow you to do what you want. You held the base of his dick and bobbed your head up and down it. To say that it was a mouthful was an understatement, it felt like your mouth was stretching from his girth, the saliva and gagging was a beautiful sight for Mingi.

"Taking my dick in your mouth so well baby." He hissed as you continued to drool down his shaft uncontrollably, you were only able to reach a little past half his length before his tip hit the back of your throat, Mingi dropped his head back as he whispered curse words while you struggled to stuff your little mouth full of his fat cock. You looked up at him and he was even more gorgeous while he fell apart from the feeling of your warm throat, he brought his head back up to meet you gaze and smiled.

“You’re so pretty with my dick in your throat baby, let’s see how pretty you are with it in your pussy.” He palmed the top of your head to remove your mouth from his dick, an audible popping noise following your lips. “Stand up and take your suit off for me baby, I don’t wanna ruin anymore of your costume.” You wondered what he was talking about until you glanced over at the full body mirror in his room to see the tear and spit stains that made your eye and cheek make up smear, not to mention your lipstick was almost completely gone. You reached your hand up to the zipper in front of your suit to slowly pull it down to reveal your soft body underneath. Stepping out of your suit you had on just panties since the suit was bodycon and made your tits sit nicely on their own, you were a bit shy standing in front of Mingi in just panties and covered your chest.

“Aww c’mon pretty don’t get shy on me now, come sit right here.” Mingi said patting his lap after he removed the remainder of his outfit. You decided to take off your panties and took a seat on Mingis bare lap facing the same way as him, the feeling of his throbbing hot dick just waiting to destroy your pussy made you scared but excited, he replaced your hands on your boobs and started to mush your mounds around, being sure to rub gentle circles on your hard nipples. He kissed up your neck while quietly breathy moans left your lips, the liquor still floating in your system was definitely on his side. His lips made it up to your ear as his lips kissed the shell of it, then he whispered softly. “Can I fuck your pretty pussy raw baby?” The thought of taking Mingis thick dick raw made your pussy pulsate, but it definitely was not a good idea to fuck a guy you just met a college party raw.

“Are you clean?” You ask bluntly, better safe than sorry.

“Of course, baby, I wouldn’t have asked if I wasn’t.” His lips continued to explore your neck and shoulders, one of his hands slid down your body to rub between your legs, coming dangerously close to where you needed him most.

“Well if you say so…” you said still a bit skeptical, his long fingers ran through your folds and rubbed circles on your clit, your eyes rolled back for a second from feeling the relief of his touch.

“You’re so wet already baby let me stuff you full of my cum.” He spread his legs which made your legs spread. “Stick it in for me baby.” You obeyed and connected the tip of his dick to your entrance and slowly sunk down on it, you usually could take dick like a porn star, but you never fucked a porn star dick like Mingis. The abundance of pleasure came with a slight stinging pain, but it was worth it once you took him all in and adjusted to his length.

Mingi gripped the underneath’s of your knees and bounced you on his length slowly to make sure you were comfortable and sped up the pace more and more.

“Oh my fucking God Mingi please you’re already fucking me too good.” You said between moans, you couldn’t even think straight with his huge cock pounding into you in this position.

“You like the way I fuck you baby? I gotta fuck you nice and deep so I can fill this pussy up with my cum.”

Okay this was the second time he has mentioned coming in you, though it was hot, and it was unlocking a secret breeding kink you didn't know you had maybe you should mention you're not on birth control.

"M-mingi, I'm not ah~ on the pill..." you managed to squeal out. Mingi lifted you knees more and continued to pound inside of you.

"That's fine baby we'll get a pill later."

Oh fuck he was serious about this, and it was turning you on more seeing how badly he wanted to cum in your pussy. Your walls started to tighten around him, wanting to milk his dick dry.

"You're tight little pussy wants my cum so bad baby, you must want me to get you nice and pregnant." he said in your ear, his words were going directly to your cunt as it throbbed harder, you moaned louder, the people that were still at the party and in the area for sure knew what was going on in that room as you yelled strings of curse words and Mingis name not caring who could hear you.

"Please give me all your babies Mingi." You were fucked out and just talking, Mingis huge dick was mixing your guts and hitting your cervix and that's all you could think of, you want, no, needed his cum to fill up your womb.

Suddenly Mingi pulled out and you whined at the lost friction, he put you on your back and slotted himself between your legs, then placed both your legs on his strong shoulders. He lined himself back up and plunged deeply in your pussy with no hesitation, you yelled out feeling his monster dick deep in your pussy again.

"Gotta breed you nice and full baby, this is the perfect position to get my cum deep in your womb." He said before he started to drill into your needy cunt, you couldn't help yourself from yelling out the obscenest things to come to mind. "I want you're cum so deep in me please" "I love your dick so much." "Please keep fucking me like this." and you felt no shame in the things you said. A dick has never had this much control or power over you, but you loved it for some reason.

"Mingi 'm gonna cum please." Mingi slowed his pace a bit then leaned forward pushing your legs to your chest as he laid in the crook of your neck then he started to deep dick fuck you, the head of his cock beating your cervix in the best way possible, you started to see stars. You wrapped your arms around his neck but couldn't stop fidgeting so you found yourself digging your nails into his shoulders, he squeezed your body closer to his large frame assuring that you had to take his entire load.

"Cum on my dick so I can make your belly full of my babies. I want your pussy to take every last drop of my seed." He pounded into you so fast and deep the bed frame shook violently, you stood no chance and coated his thick dick in your slick, feeling your walls squeeze him tightly made Mingi groan, he lasted a few more strokes then filled your walls and womb with his hot cum. Such a big dick of course his load would be just as big, you swore you felt your tummy bulging as he laid on top of you while his dick continued to shoot inside of you. Once he finished Mingi dropped on the side of you, both of you were sweaty and out of breath, Mingi didn't offer to clean you up or even attempt to move so you asked him for some spare clothes to go to the bath room to do it for yourself, you assumed he was too tired. You put on one of his jogging suits with nothing under neath and headed to the bathroom down the hall.

Once you washed your face of all make up and the rest of your body you headed downstairs, it was now 3:46am and the party turned into a chill hang out with still quite a few people around. You wanted to get a non-alcoholic drink for your dry and sore throat, once in the kitchen you grabbed a bottle of water and turned around to be met with your ex.

"Oh...Jongho, hey." you said awkwardly.

"Y/N, I've been looking for you, I saw you earlier and wanted to talk to you." He said looking over your outfit. "You're not wearing you're costume anymore, what happened?" he questioned.

"Well, I-" as you started to come up with an excuse or lie a large arm wrapped around your shoulder and pulled you into his t-shirt covered chest.

"Y/N there you are, I was waiting on you to come back baby." Mingi said pulling you in to a kiss, then his eyes looked over to Jongho. "Yo, names Mingi." Jongho’ s eye twitched a bit.

"Well, I see you're occupied, I'll talk to you later Y/N." Jongho said before walking off.

You and mingi looked at each other then laughed, Mingi took you back to his room to cuddle and sleep (And go for a few more rounds). The next afternoon you finally woke up at 12pm with a pounding headache and Mingi not in his bed. You figured he had something to do and collected your costume, texted Hongjoong to come pick you up then headed downstairs to do the walk of shame alone. Luckily it was only Wooyoung and one other male there, they noticed you walking down the stairs and you walked over to them.

"Well good afternoon gorgeous, I see someone had a good night." Wooyoung said smiling at you. "Who's the lucky guy?" He said as both the males looked at you.

"Um, I actually never met him, but he was one of your room mates, Mingi, he was super nice and said he was going to text me so he could take me out later." You had such a sweet smile on your face while Wooyoung and the other man’s face was quite the opposite.

"Weeelll um, I wouldn't hold my breath on that Y/N, but I'm glad your optimistic." Wooyoung said.

"Woo be straight up with her, Mingi isn't exactly, how can I say this, the dating type." The other one said.

"Who are you?" You asked.

"This is San, I was hoping to hook you guys up but looks like Mingi snagged ya first." Both the males chuckled.

"Anyway, Mingi is what most girls call a fuck boy, he tells you everything you wanna hear but never delivers." San said.

You thought about what they were saying, no way was the guy that talked to you for hours and cuddled you so warmly just a fuck boy right?

"Whatever you guys are just mean! My rides here I gotta go." They both laughed at your temper tantrum and waved you goodbye.

You walked out to the car to see Hongjoong in the driver seat and Seonghwa in the back, you smiled and got in the car.

"Well, well, looks like I'm not the only one that had an eventful night." you said teasing Hongjoong.

Seonghwa giggled and Hongjoong blushed "Shut up! Why did you need me to stop at a pharmacy before I took you home?"

"Well my night was SUPER, eventful if you get my drift." you said raising your eyebrows so Hongjoong would pick up on what you were saying.

"Ew, you let one of those guys hit it raw AND finish in you, I taught you better than this Y/N." He rolled his eyes in fake disgust and drove off.

"So how was it Y/N?" Seonghwa asked.

"It was fucking amazing, I've never had a huge one like that and god I couldn't even think straight." you replied, excited to tell someone about your endeavors.

"Wow, who was it with? Was it Wooyoung? He always says you're pretty but off limits, or did he finally introduce you to San?" Seonghwa said intrigued to know the answer.

"Neither, it was his other roommate, Mingi." You said smiling, Seonghwa made a face.

"Well, I'm glad you enjoyed yourself at least." He said it in a specific voice that you and Hongjoong picked up on.

"Why did you say it like that Hwa?" Hongjoong asked.

"It's just that Mingi is well... a free spirit, kinda goes where he wants and does what he wants."

"Oh god did you fuck the house fuckboy Y/N?" Hongjoong asked bluntly.

"No! Why does everyone keep saying that I know how to clock a fuck boy." you did however start to get nervous since you did text Mingi when you woke up saying how much you enjoyed last night and asking him for the money for the pill and all he replied was "GM" and only sent $23.

"Dammit Y/N how do you get involved with a fuck boy right after getting your heart broken." Hongjoong said as he pulled into the pharmacy.

Now there you were, standing in the pharmacy, holding a plan B, telling a child not to talk to fuck boys and having to have your male best friend send you the remaining amount to cover the pill. About a week had passed and you accepted that you had been fucked over and that you weren't getting that date after the 5th unanswered text, you sat in your studio apartment late that night since you stayed up to binge a show, it was around 2am then your phone buzzed, you checked your phone assuming it was Hongjoong.

Mingi: Hey baby u up?

[heartofwritiing]

could you write wilbur soot confessing his love to a crush? 👉👈

something about how he's been pinning after this crush for so long, but the crush seems a bit avoidant or something

but that's because the crush also has a crush on him and is very very shy qpwimsmanssjslslek sorry im not good with requests

You and me need never be, lonely again.

Paring: cc!wilbur soot x fem!cc!reader

authors note: Thank you so much for requesting! I hope you don't mind the reader being a content creator and i’m sorry she’s not super shy because im not really sure how to write shy lol but i hope you like the request! I just thought it would add to the idea and I've wanted to do something similar to this for a while! This is a request back from august. I am so sorry this took me so long to get out. I've been going through some shit irl but I'm finally starting to come back to writing because I genuinely love it and posting on here since it is my safe space!

line from this prompt list

warnings: friends-lovers, reader lives in the US, brief description of anxiety, the reader sends mixed signals, swearing, kinda angsty, happy end, super unedited!

"No! That was such bullshit!"

The voice of Tommyinnit ran through the speakers of your computer causing you to let out a chuckle that you were the reason for his outburst.

You were playing Gang Beasts on stream with some of your closest friends, and you had grabbed Tommy's character and thrown him off the map by picking him up.

Laughter rang out amongst the group as the screen card popped up saying your username won. You cheered as everyone groaned but dispersed into 'ggs' then that's when everyone started to bid goodnight. You hadn't realized it had been four hours of streaming and playing games, showing the good time you were having with friends.

"Alright chat, that's gonna be it for me today! Please remember to click the follow button if you're new to stream that way you'll know when I go live! byeee!" You did your outro, quickly closed your stream down, and logged out of Twitch.

It was an uneventful stream session, thank god. You’ve noticed more and more how your chat gets when you even mention wilburs name.

“you logging off completely y/n/n?” Ranboos voices asks through your earbuds.

“No, I’ll play a few more rounds if you guys are down,” you respond.

“HELL YEAH!” Tommy boasted. “IM GONNA KICK YOUR ASS THIS TIME Y/N/N!”

“Oh, it’s on gremlin child!” you replied.

Wilbur listened to this conversation on his end, letting out a chuckle. He honestly doesn’t know why you make him laugh so easily. Anytime you threw a genius comment toward Tommy that was deemed insulting, or calling him a name Wilbur fell for you more and more. If only he had the guts to tell you.

You as well wouldn’t admit it but every time Wilbur laughed all you could feel was butterflies punching your stomach and a smile that made your cheeks hurt. You were also falling hard for him.

After about another fifteen minutes, Tommy and Ranboo had bid their goodbyes for the night and ended their calls. You were left in call with Wilbur, the silence could be cut with a knife.

Knowing him for two years was hard. Wilbur was everything to you. He was funny, smart, charming, and overall made you feel comfortable. Something you thought you’d never have with anyone. Having to only talk on call and video made things easier for you. On call you could hide your blushes and smiles from him, but not from your chat who caught every interaction between you and Wilbur when you streamed. The constant ’Wilbur x name confirmed?’ tweets and comments in your twitch chat were recently repetitive and you wondered when you became such a beacon of attention. It gave you such anxiety to have all eyes on you when you wanted to spend time with your best friend.

It was getting obnoxious to the point where you debated making a tweet to get the fans to stop shipping you both, even if you were dating it was no one’s business. Still you never dared to say anything out of fear of stans coming at you in anyway. You didn’t need to draw more unwanted attention to yourself.

“You logging off? it’s getting pretty late for you,” you spoke up.

“Yeah, we both should, by the way what times your flight tomorrow?”

Right, you were flying less than eight hours from now to finally meet your friends inperson. You all had planned this for months, booking hotels and flights, making a whole deal about it. Then you really wouldn’t be able to hide from him for a whole week.

“Around seven-thirty,” you reply.

He hums.

“I’ll let you get some rest, see you tomorrow night darling,” his voice purposely going lower on the ‘darling’ part that you almost didn’t catch it, making your knees go weak.

“N-night Will,” you stutter, end call and slump back into your desk chair trying to calm your racing heart. Meanwhile Wilbur all the way across the ocean in Brighton has a smile plastered across his lips.

About a plane ride, a train ride and car ride later, you are stood in the hotel lobby in Brighton waiting for a late Tommy and Wilbur to arrive. You were super nervous to meet them. Having only been friends for what was a short time, it felt like you knew them for years, so why was this so scary?

You debated in your mind about texting them to see if they were close by, but you didn’t want to come off as annoying and impatient. You wanted to make a good first impression, but again these were your friends. Why were you shaking with nerves?

You fiddled with your thumb’s absentmindedly until you felt a pair of hands on your shoulders, causing you to jump out of your skin. You spin around to be met with a cackling Tommy who is clucking his stomach from laughing so hard at your reaction.

“Fucking gremlin child,” you huffed under your breath, not realizing the evident blood rushing to your cheeks from being startled so easily.

“It’s nice to hear you say that in person,” a deep voice said from behind Tommy. You shifted your eyes to see a very tall Wilbur, who was wearing his round glasses pushed up his nose and curly hair fluffed to the side.

His dark sweater selves rolled up to revel his arms tucked into his side as he gazed at you with a soft smile. Finally after two years of being separated by seas, your best friend was standing right in front of you. It was surreal to say the least.

You laugh and jump forward to embrace him. The number of times you’d tease him over-call about his height made you regret your words. He towers over you as he bends down to your level to give you a long awaited hug. His arms are soft, yet firm as they wrap around your back and cage you into his embrace.

You both pull away, both grinning from ear to ear. He looks down at you with a hint of something behind his eyes, he seems to be genuinely happy to finally meet you in person. which makes you blush at the thought of him looking forward to this moment since you told him you wanted to come here. You're quickly brought out of your moment when Tommy speaks up behind you.

"So he gets a hug and I don't?!" his tone slightly offended.

"Yup, cause you're annoying," you bring a hand up to flick his forehead, causing him to let out a irritated noise. you had only just met him in person but something compelled you to do that. Maybe it was just a reason for you to break the ice and it was working because you all broke out into giggles.

“Im just kidding Tom,” you motion him into a hug.

Wilbur just stood observing the entire interaction between his two best friends. He was thrilled to finally have you here, he couldn't wait to show you all his favorite places, hang out, and get to know better in person. Finally.

The two boys had managed to drag you to the beach, and even though it was freezing Tommy insisted on going to the arcade to try and win another 'vlog gun'. After suffering through loosing a few games, Wilbur managed to win you a little stuffed cat that you promptly named Mr Whiskers.

It was endearing to watch him struggle at most of the games so he could get enough tickets. It was all worth it in his eyes to embarrass himself by losing ski-ball to you, twice, he saw the evident blush on your cheeks and the look you gave him. As if he hung the stars in the sky just for you. It made his chest hurt in a good way.

The rest of the night went smoothly for the most part. More and more, Wilbur had been getting more touchy with you. Though you didn’t mind it at all, maybe he didn’t realize how much he was putting his hand on you as you walked side by side as he led you through crowds. How he held doors open for you. It was sweet.

Maybe he was doing it just to be nice. That small voice in the back of your head telling you thats all it was. Because thats what friends do.

Eventually, the three of you met up with Ranboo and Charlie. They were just how they were online, which made meeting them a whole lot better. Walking around Brighton, making inside jokes and teasing each other. You hadn't been this happy in a while. You can remember the last time you genuinely enjoyed yourself, your friends were the product of that. You were fortunate to have found them when you did. Quarantine was hard on you, much like the rest of the world. So when you were invited to join a group game call, you couldn't pass up the opportunity. That night, something had clicked between you and Wilburt specifically. Then you started to join more calls with the gang and the rest was history.

Sometime in the night, you found yourself walking behind with Wilbur by your side chatting about nothing in particular. Until the comfortable silence filled the air between you, you took a moment to take in the nightlife of Brighton. The street lamps guide your way through the beachside and the pubs on the corner were starting to fill up. As if the city was somehow more alive at night.

"I'm really glad you came," Wilbur speaks, sincerely.

You stop your wide-eyed gaze to look at him and smile softly at him.

"I am too," You gush. "I'm honestly considering moving here,” Now he’s smiling.

Wilbur's brain starts to go a million miles a second. His heart leaped at the thought of you living closer to him. Seeing you in person everyday seemed like a dream come true. He begins to slow his step and a frown replaces your smile. Your own thoughts running rampant now, assuming you might've freaked him out by voicing that you wanted to move here so soon after meeting him in person. Maybe it made him uncomfortable. it was too soon to say something that bold. You had only just met him in person today.

"Listen, Y/N..."

You stopped and your brain got the best of you with his tone. You shouldn't have said anything like that to him. It was too soon.

“I don’t want to sound cheesy, but I need you to know how I feel.”

Oh... OH.

You knew what this was leading to. Realizing why he was acting the way he was all day.

"I like you, more than like you. You're funny, beautiful, smart, and everything I could've hoped for in a best friend. But I can't keep pretending I don't think of you when we aren't talking, or how when I look at you my chest hurts."

Wilbur liked you. Really liked you. You would jump for joy and shout to the rooftops about how much you reciprocate his feelings but something in the back of your mind told you not to. The doubt in your mind from yourself, both your fans online judging. It made you slowly start to panic. You felt as though you weren’t good enough for him.

You saw the aftermath of when his fans shipped him and Niki together. It almost ruined their friendship. You didn’t want that.

"Please say something?" he stops his rant to notice you are staring up at him with blank eyes.

"I-uh," you stutter. "can we maybe not do this now?"

His face falls and it instantly crushes you with regret. His disappointment shows as he gives you a forced smile and nods.

"Y-yeah, let's catch up with everyone, Tommy wants to do this big stream at his place." he gestures for you to move along with him, all while you feel horrible for doing this.

You wish you could take back what you said. You know you've hurt him, It's painfully obvious when he doesn't talk to you for the rest of the walk. You glance at him a few times but he keeps his eyes forward and stoic.

If only you didn’t let your anxiety get the best of you. You had to talk to him at some point, but for now you pushed it aside. The rest of the group didn’t seem to notice the sudden tension between the two of you, if they did nothing was remarked about it.

As you continued the journey to Tommys flat, you and Wilbur still walked silently side by side. With what little courage you had, you reached out your hand and held his in a moment of truce. Giving it a gentle squeeze with your fingers to seal the deal that you would talk later. You heard his soft inhale at the contact and he squeezes back. Your shoulders drop from the weight of tension being lifted off. Maybe, just maybe this ment this conversation wasn’t over.

Back at Tommy’s, the monitor in his cramped bedroom with everyone packed together like sardines; shows the twitch chat flashing by with viewers comments.

“WELCOME BACK TO THE STREAM EVERYONE!” Tommy shouted causing you to hold your ear in slight pain.

“God Tommy, could you be anymore loud?” you wince.

“Look who’s here chat!” he gestured to you with his hands, ignoring your complaints. You waved at the webcam as chat went crazy. He introduced everyone else as they all broke out into a chorus of conversation.

Wilbur was mostly quiet on your left, an occasional sarcastic comment made here and there. You could practically feel his eyes buring into the side of your head. Hopping chat wasn’t noticing how he was looking at you, your eyes shifting to your lap to fidget with your fingers.

Out of view, Wilbur reached over and took your hand picking at the skin around your nails. You had stopped your nervous tick and opted for squeezing his hand. Nobody seemed to notice the sudden shift in both your behavior.

Suddenly you felt tense, the feeling of having everyone’s eyes on you made your mind start to spiral.

Letting go of Wilburs hand, you quickly had excused yourself and walked out of Tommys room and into the kitchen.

Everyone had a mix of concerned and worried expressions as they watched you leave the room but didn’t say anything about it. Wilbur had followed you in pursuit. He found you in the kitchen hyperventilating Your panic had taken over and now your lungs were paying the price for the burning sensation from not breathing.

“it's okay,” he took your face into his hands and held you. “just follow my breaths.

he took a breath in, and you followed.

When you came to your senses, Wilbur had asked you what was wrong and you just began to cry. Everything came rushing down on you.

“Im sorry. I-Im sorry I shot you down earlier, Im sorry for h-hurting you. I-i,” you stuttered over yourself. Wilbur shakes his head at you. He probably thinks you’re such a mess.

“I don’t understand, I know you like me too, so I don’t understand why you rejected me after I poured my heart out to you. Then you go and hold my hand while we're walking.'

Wilbur was right. Playing with his feelings was selfish and cruel. He was completely in the right to question you. You were practically flirting with one another all day, and then you shut down his advances of trying to open your relationship.

“I do wanna be with you.” you sniff. “I'm just really scared.”

"Why darling? It's just me, your silly old Wil." he pokes at your sides causing you to let out a giggle. Your best friend, who looked at you with the prettiest chocolate eyes, who stayed on call with you all night when you couldn't sleep. The only person you told your deepest fears and dreams to.

You take a shaky inhale as you begin to explain. "I don't wanna ruin our friendship, we have something I've never experienced with anyone else in my life. I care about you too much to let me be a distraction in your life, and I am scared that the fans will-"

Wilbur interrupts you with a hand on your arm.

"The fans? darling who cares about that, I care way too much about you to even care about what strangers think. It's no one's business who I, or you for that matter have a relationship with." he clarified. "I love you and nothing or no one will ever change that."

Those three words made your heart leap in your throat.

"Y-you l-love me?" you stutter in disbelief.

"Yes, of course I do."

Tears roll down the apples of your cheeks as you lean forward to engulf Wilbur into another hug. His arms wrapped around your back reciprocating your embrace. your face buried in his neck as you inhale his cologne and your tears dampen his skin.

"I love you too Wil," you whisper.

He squeezes you closer to him in return and this time you don't hold yourself back...

-

taglist: @trashcanduck @ax-y10 @mysticalsoot @idontreallyexistyet @loonalvjy @toastyliltoasts41

[phantomannkaun]

𝙲𝙷𝙾𝚂𝙾 𝙺𝙰𝙼𝙾 𝚇 𝚁𝙴𝙰𝙳𝙴𝚁 ~ ѕмυт σηєѕнσт

︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦

contains: smut, 18+ (minors dni), fem reader, relationship, kissing, praising, foreplay, sex, forecful, romance, teasing, slight edging and self pleasure, pet names.

𝘁𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗸𝘀 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘅𝗼𝘅𝗼 （。ˇ ⊖ˇ）

︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦

︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦

Choso and you have been dating for about a month and a half. He is absolutely obsessed with everything about you. He's extremely attached to you in everyway and loves to praise you. The topic of sex has been brought up many times but you guys have never gotten the opportunity. You guys have done a lot of things besides that but never gotten to that point.

Choso had gotten back to his place early that day. He was really really in the mood and he wanted to make tonight super special for the both of you. He literally cannot stop thinking about you. He picks up his phone from the nightstand and decided to call you. The phone rings for a couple seconds before you pick up.

You: "hey babe! what's up?" you say cheerfully.

Choso: "hey. uhm... could you... come over tonight?" Choso says in his monotone voice.

You: You giggle a little bit "of course Cho! is something wrong or...?"

Choso: "nono nothings wrong I just... really uhm... I'm- just come over sweetheart." Choso says stuttering a little bit but sounding a little seductive.

You: "yeah! i'll be there in an hour if that's okay love?" You reply in a cheerful hopeful tone.

Choso: "perfect. I'll see you then y/n." Choso ends the conversation.

He places his phone next to him falls back down onto his bed and covers his eyes with his hands. "fuck..." Choso is remembering everything about you from the way you talk to your face and body and he can't help but get turned on. Choso has an hour until you arrive, he takes this time to light a romantic candle in his room and go take a shower.

As he walks into the bathroom and proceeds to take off his clothes and undo his hair. He likes his showers burning hot and steamy. As he's in the shower it's hard to ignore what's below. He can't help but feel himself a bit thinking about you. He cannot wait for you to get there. As he goes slow up and down with the water running down his whole body he feels himself slowly getting there and he stops. He wants to save the climax for you as painful as it is for him.

He finishes his shower and proceeds to get ready. He decided to leave his hair down that night and puts on a white oversized shirt with baggy black sweatpants. He makes sure he smells good and his room is neat. Choso is a romantic guy so he definitely made the mood in the room warm and romantic with the lighting.

Soon enough, he receives an "i'm here!" text from you. He gets a wave of nervousness and excitement to see you again. He goes to the door fast and quickly opens it. When opening the door you're seen with a black tank top with a oversized hoodie over and tight black ripped jeans. Your aroma from your perfume is really getting to him now. It's pure ecstasy every time he smells it. Before even saying anything he gives you a warm hug and welcomes you inside, closing the door after.

You can smell the candle and see the room from where you're standing. "Mmm it smells really good in here Cho! What's the occasion?" You look up deeply into his eyes.

Choso looks back into your eyes and looks away when he realizes he's blushing. "Occasion? oh- well..." Choso wants to ask but doesn't wanna force you.

You realize what he's suggesting. The topic has been in your mind for a couple weeks now but you two had never had the opportunity. You grew super excited and turned on. You looked up at him seductively and got closer to him. You wanted to make the first move so he would feel more comfortable knowing you're comfortable.

You move your body more and more onto his and lean in to kiss him. Choso grabs your waist and pulls you in more as you kiss softly. One thing leads to another and you two have tongues locked into each others mouths feeling each other. Choso decides to push you up against the nearest wall to have more control. He presses his warm tongue more and more into your mouth while slightly grinding on to your body. He finally pulls away not before lightly biting your lower lip carefully.

Breathing heavily face to face, he looks you in the eyes deeply with his cat-like tired eyes. "Are you okay with all of this darling...?" He says still panting.

You nod while still looking up at him with lustful eyes. You love being in his disposal. One thing leads to another and you two are sitting on his bed slowly making out. As it gets more aggressive his tongue is basically down your throat. He starts holding your face tightly and he's pushing your head more into the kiss.

With more romance and aggression he starts to get on top of you while pushing you down on the bed. He pulls away for a quick second to take his shirt off and throw it to the side. He pins you back down instantly after to continue. He is now above you pushing himself against you continuing to make out with you romantically. After a bit you pull away for a second. A line of salvia is coming from his mouth to yours followed by panting.

"You wanna do this y/n?" Choso says while sweating and panting.

You look up at him cleared turned on with flushed red cheeks."Mhmm~"

Choso begins to slightly whisper seductively while leaning closer to your ear. "I promise I'll make this unforgettable as ever my love."

He proceeded to pull you up so you two are now upright. One of his hands are supporting your back and the other reaching down to your pants. You pants slide off to reveal your lace black thong. You take your own hoodie off and toss it to the side. Choso cannot pull away from your lips he's infatuated with you at this point.

Choso slams you back down as you're sprawled out on the bed only in a thong and tank top and bra. He looks down at you with deep love and lust. He wipes his forehead of sweat and took his sweatpants off, threw them to the side where all the other clothes were. Now he was only wear his boxers. He slowly leaned down into your neck leaving soft kisses which were followed by slow sensual marks. Your moans and movements only made him do it slower so you could feel everything.

"Ch-cho~ mm.." You cried out in pleasure.

He slowly made his way down your chest and lifted your tank top up and started kissing you. You took the rest of your tank top off. His kisses although slow got more aggressive which caused you to arch your back a bit. Choso took this opportunity to reach behind you to unclip your bra.

"You're doing so well... arch it just like that for me babe..." Choso said softly acting like he was rock hard and holding back going crazy on you.

Your bra was now completely off and Choso made his way to your breasts. You were super sensitive at the moment. He began lightly biting and sucking causing you to squirm and squeal. You grabbed his warm exposed back and scratched a little while also softly pulling his hair. Choso was talking you through everything now.

"You're doing so well princess... be patient.." After saying that he contiuned to work on your body softly and sensual.

It was so romantic and slow. You could tell he wanted to make your guys' first time slow and enjoyable which you appreciated very much. The sucking and biting continued to each of your breasts. He was pressed onto you and could feel how moist you were becoming. He suddenly got up and grabbed your wrists pinning you below him.

"You want it doll?" Choso said staring into your eyes.

You nodded and quietly moaned "y-yes..."

"Are you going to take it?" Choso asked while still staring down at you.

"Mhm..." You said while nodding.

"Good girl..." He said before completely taking his boxers off and your thong off.

He positioned his cock by your seeping wet cvnt. Before his put it in he wanted to tease you a bit so he rubbed his tip against you which caused you to moan.

"Are you gonna beg?" Choso asked while smirking.

"p-please Cho~ I-" You proceeded to beg more and more.

"shh... be quiet until I tell you to love. can you do that for me?" Choso asked.

You replied with a nod before he covered your mouth and put in it slow but hard. You squealed softly but managed to stay quiet for the most part. His cock was long with many veins. The curve hit you in your spot which caused you to squirm under him. He grabbed your waist with one arm and the other still pinning you.

"...fuck babe... you're so tight ergh! you're doing so good- just like that-" Choso said.

You now realized Choso isn't the type to stay quiet. But that didn't bother you, you wanted him to be vocal with you.

"you're such a good girl babe~ cmon keep staying quiet for me." Choso also loved to praise you because he could see the affect it had on you and it turned him on.

"Ch-Cho~ I- don't know if I can-" You moaned finally letting go.

"shh... i've got you darling. you're doing so good just like that~" Choso continued.

With each thrust he made it more romantic than the last. He readjusted his hands so now both of his arms were in between your head as he was still on top of you. Your arms wrapped around his back, the pleasure was so overstimulating that you dug your nails into your back.

Choso groaned as you hurt him. "f-fuck... keep going-"

This made his thrusts even better from the last. You could feel him inside of you pushing you to your limits. It was only a couple minutes and you felt so close to climax. You were getting more into it by moving your hips into his which made him basically go insane.

"fuck. you're so good at this... fuck please keep going babe- you're doing so- good." He was struggling to form a sentence at this point.

Choso got more needy and decided to just begin going at it at that point. He made sure to try and still be cautious and considerate while also just letting loose. He grabbed you to sit upright but still sort of on his lap. This new position made it harder but feel better for the both of you.

"y/n... babe.. i wanna fill you up baby. i wanna fill you up so fucking bad- ergh i can't r-resist" He started to get impatient.

Before you knew you were reaching your climax. "Ch-choso I- I'm g-gonna finish" You moaned while struggling.

Choso knew what to do and that was to not change what he was doing at all. He kept the same position, pace and the way he was doing it. Soon enough, your body shook lightly as you finished. You had tiny tears from pleasure in your eyes.

Choso wanted to make sure you're still okay with him finishing so he went slower for a second to ask "do you wanna keep going babe?" You shook your head in approval.

He then flipped you over to where you were on your stomach. He held your lower back down and put it in once more. He started off slow, this position was so comfortable for the both of you. Learning each other was going so well.

"baby... i don't wanna hold back-" Choso said as he dug his nails in your waist and grinded on you faster and more sensual. His tip was hitting you more and more. You buried your face in the pillow to moan out loudly. Choso got faster and faster. He was pretty vocal while doing it. Finally he loosened his grip and slowly pulled out. He was dripping all over your back.

"shit... you felt- so good babe- you did so good." he said in such a calm tired voice.

For aftercare, Choso went to go grab a towel and help you clean up before he got himself. Choso gives you as much reassurance as you needed. Cuddles are a given as well. He would also say thank you and tell you just how good you were and how that was the best ever.

"I love you so much y/n"

︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶

[cringe-but-proud]

So I am totally in love with Regulus and I saw you were taking requests for him so I thought I would ask for an idea that has been on my mind for a bit.

So basically it’s grumpy x sunshine with Reggie and Fem!reader. Maybe there in the library and Reggie is listening to reader go over the books she's read like she rambling as Reggie just listen and occasionally comments you can add more if you like!!

If this makes you comfortable please feel free to ignore this request!

OMG YES. GUYS I FUCKING LOVE REGULUS BLACK.

Sorry. I'm normal.

Regulus black x Fem!Reader

A/n: I didn't wanna write about a book no one knew about, so I decided to play it safe and make reader like Romeo and Juliet. Also my requests are open (and I'm always happy to write about my babygirl, pookie bear, pathetic little meow meow, Regulus Black)

Regulus honestly didn't know how he got to this point. Y/n was never supposed to be anyone special to him. They'd been partnered up together for a Herbology project and as soon as it was over, he was supposed to never talk to her again.

But, of course, as always, things couldn't be that simple for him.

And now, here he was, studying with her almost everyday. Studying might not be the best word for it, a lot of the time it was just the two of them hanging out in the library together. But, he wasn't going to admit he enjoyed hanging out with Y/n. Just like how he wasn't going to admit that he'd developed feelings for her.

The two of them sat in the library like they did almost everyday. Y/n was rambling to him about a book she had to read for her history of magic class.

"I just don't understand why assigned reading is always so boring. That's the reason so many people don't like reading, I think. It's because they only read books that they're forced to read in school, and almost all of those books are boring, so they assume every book is boring, and then they hate reading."

Regulus was used to this. Y/n was always quite talkative. She could go on for hours about pretty much any subject. He didn't mind. He liked listening to her.

"The last time I remember actually enjoying a book I was forced to read for school was when I read Romeo and Juliet. But, a lot of people hated reading Romeo and Juliet, but I think that's just because it's written in old-time-y language, y'know?"

"What's Romeo and Juliet?" Regulus asked curiously.

Y/n paused at that. "Seriously?"

Regulus felt himself begin to blush. Was he supposed to know what that was? Did he sound dumb? "I mean, I know it's a book, but..." he shrugged.

"You've never heard of Romeo and Juliet."

He shook his head.

"How is that even possible?" She chuckled. "It's a classic! It's the classic. I thought-"

"Is it a muggle book?"

She paused at his question. "Well, yeah."

"That's why I've never heard of it. My mother doesn't let me read muggle books."

"Not even Romeo and Juliet?" Y/n shook her head. "That's insane."

"Yeah..." Regulus sighed. His mother was one of the reasons he couldn't admit he had feelings for Y/n. His mother would definitely not approve of Y/n. She wasn't the type of person that the Black family associated with. She was too bubbly, too kind, too accepting of others despite whatever differences they might have. Too happy.

"Anyways," Regulus shook the thoughts of his mother out of his head. "What's it about?"

Y/n smiled. "I can't believe I'm about to explain the plot of Romeo and Juliet to someone."

"Sorry..."

"No, no! I'm excited. It'll be fun." She said reassuringly. "Ok, first of all, it's not really a book. It's a play. But, you never get to just watch the play, you always have to read it in school." She explained. "It's a tragedy written by Shakespeare who's like, a super important guy who wrote a bunch of plays during the Renaissance."

Regulus nodded along as she spoke.

"His most well known play is Romeo and Juliet, which is a romantic tragedy about two starcrossed lovers."

"So..." He was curious now. "What happens in it?"

"Are you asking me to spoil it for you?"

"I guess."

"Romeo and Juliet both die at the end." She says. "Which technically isn't a spoiler, because at the very beginning of the play, there's a prologue where they tell you 'Hey, they both die in the end', but whatever."

Regulus didn't expect that. "And you... liked reading this?"

"Yeah." She shrugged.

"Why?"

"Well..." She thought about it for a moment. "I've always liked romance. And even though this one obviously doesn't have a happy ending, it's still a classic. And I like seeing all the different adaptations of it."

"Adaptations?"

"Oh!" She lit up. "That's another thing! Another reason it's so popular is because there are a bunch of different versions of the story. People make movie versions of it all the time, there's this really good musical, west side story that's based off of it." She gasped. "We should watch one together!"

He blushed at the thought. Watching a movie with her? Like a date? "We should?"

"Yeah! I mean, only if you want to. But, I think it'd be really fun!"

"So..." He looked away. "Tonight?"

"What?"

"I mean, do you want to watch it tonight?"

Y/n was a bit surprised he was so eager to do this. "Yeah. Yeah, sure." She smiled. "We can make popcorn, and get a bunch of blankets and pillows, make it a whole experience." She gathered her things from the table they were sitting at. "Does that sound good?"

Regulus nodded, a small smile playing on his lips. "Sounds amazing."

"Great." She gave him a quick hug. "I'll see you tonight."

Maybe her eyes were playing tricks on her, but she could've sworn she saw a blush creep on to his cheeks before she turned to walk away.

[tangerinesgf]

I see you say sub Tom Ryder and humbly request a fic where he cums quickly/prematurely ejaculates and is maybe super embarrassed about it (or not up to you how he reacts!!)

So maybe you're trying to train him to last longer (it takes a while)

Tom Ryder x FEM!reader

Tags/Warnings: Smut 18+ MDNI, P in V sex, comfort, fluff, sub Tom Ryder

A/N: Tysm for your request, I hope you enjoy this little story. I think it turned out pretty well :)

As any other normal couple you and Tom Ryder had sex on a regular basis. It was amazing how good he could make you feel with his tongue or fingers deep inside you, that had never been the problem after all.

The issue started the first time he wanted to really fuck you.

He clearly hadn't been with a girl like that before, he wasn't used to the feeling of being inside of you. The sensation was overwhelming to him and after only a mere few thrusts he had already orgasmed, leaving you to finish up for yourself while he caught his breath.

After both of you had finished there was an awkward silence in the room. You didn't know what to say and Tom was clearly too embarrassed to bring it up as well.

After that you tried a couple more times, but the same thing kept happening, ending in the same awkward silence everytime.

That was until you had had enough of it and decided to bring it up. You wanted to help him, not only for your own benefit, but to help him gain his confidence back as well.

So here you are in bed with him. You can tell he's nervous about being inside you again. The idea of letting you down again is eating him up inside. He just wants to make you feel good.

"It's alright, love.. we're just gonna go slow. Follow my voice yeah?" You say in a soft comforting tone.

The idea was for you to ride him. He wouldn't have to move, just take it and try not to cum. It sounded so simple. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah.. yeah just nervous." He mumbles, avoiding eyecontact with you.

"Hey.." You gently grab his chin and make him look at you. "It's gonna be alright."

He nods and gives the go ahead for you to start. You slowly sink down on his hard cock, drawing a low groan from his throat. You settle down, letting yourself adjust to his size.

"You good?" You ask him once again. He just nods in response, but that's not enough for you.

"Words, love. Use your words." You say in a slightly commanding tone that turns him on so much.

"Yeah.. yes. I´m okay, You can- you can move if you want." His voice already sounds strained and you haven´t even moved yet.

His hands make fists in the sheets as you slowly start riding him, his breaths are laboured as he tries to hold himself back with everything he has. For you.

"So good.. just a little longer.." You whisper breathlessly as you increase the pace just a tad.

"You're doing so good, baby.. so good f'me." You praise him in between moans. You can tell he's on the edge of cumming, but you just want him to hold on a little bit longer.

"I can't.. 's too much." Tom mutters as his eyes roll back in his head. Desperate whimpers leave his lips, silent tears are running down his face.

"I'm close, Tom.. just a little longer. You're doing so well."

Unfortunately he can't hold out long enough for you to finish and with a loud cry he bucks his hips up into you, cumming inside you.

Ryder's body falls limp on the bed, completely spend from his mindblowing orgasm. You

"I'm sorry.." he whimpers softly as you lay down on his chest. "I couldn't hold it.."

Your face softens at his words. You know how much he wanted this to go well. To finally do good and make you cum.

"Oh no, no baby.. you did so well. Such a good boy." You gently brush his hair out of his face before giving him a small kiss

"We'll try again next time." You whisper softly as you try to comfort him.

Tom hums softly before wrapping his arms around you, pulling you close to him as you lay on his chest.

"You're being way too patient with me, love. Can't even fuck you properly.." He mutters into your hair.

"'S okay.. you'll get there. I'm willing to wait."

Your words make him feel safe and understood. He'd expected you to leave him after the first time he couldn't make you cum. Then the second and third time, but you still stayed.

It didn't really make sense to him, but he was glad you were still here.

"You're amazing." He kisses the crown of your head before settling into a comfortable silence with you. And after a few minutes both of you are fast asleep in each other's arms.

A/N: Thank you so much for reading, I hope you enjoyed it! Reblogs and comments are so much appreciated you don't even know. Please send me Tom Ryder requests if you have any. Love you guys <3

Taglist: @earth-elemental18 @allaroundjejje (lemme know if you wanna be added or removed)

[jasntodds]

Petrichor [16]

Pairing: Jason Todd x Fem!Powered!Reader (little bit of fwb)

Words: 13,749

Chapter Warnings: Swearing, angst, fluff, blood, gunshot wound, a little bit of gore, mentions of death, panic attacks, hurt/comfort

Summary: ❝Pylades: I’ll take care of you. Orestes: It’s rotten work. Pylades: Not to me. Not if it’s you.❞

Gotham is home, not just for Jason but for you, too. And now that you’re both finally back home, together, you’re ready to see where this next chapter brings the two of you. He’s your best friend and you’re his. And you both might want a little something more with being back home, the place you both feel most comfortable. Surely, nothing could possibly go wrong now.

A/N: Hey!! lmao so sorry for the super late update. I was sick and then some personal stuff happened and then I thought I got covid so yeah hi lol I'm so sorry lol This chapter was like 20k+ words so I split it into two because that was a lot lol You can add yourself to the tag list below, ask me to be tagged, or you can follow my library blog @jasntoddslibrary  and turn on notifications if you prefer that!! I love feedback, I swear it keeps me posting on a weekly basis 😭

series masterlist | masterlist | tag list

Jason is stuck pacing back and forth in the room he’s calling a bedroom now. Worry has taken every part of him as his hand grips his phone like a vice. It’s been hours. He hasn’t heard from you or Dick or Gar. He hasn’t heard from anyone and he’s tried calling you seven times. But, your phone is off and your phone is never off. That is the one thing about you, your phone will never be off unless there is a reason for it and being hurt isn’t a good reason. Not to you. The only time your phone even dies is…never. Jason thinks about it and he doesn’t think you’ve let your phone even reach 20% in the entire time you’ve known each other. He thinks it’s probably so someone can always find you and you can always call for help because you’re almost paranoid about it dying. Your phone doesn’t die.

That leaves Jason thinking the worst of the worst. If your phone is off, that means it has to be dead or you shut it off for some reason but that’s uncharacteristic of you. So, he thinks maybe it did die and if it died, that’s because you didn’t charge it. If you didn’t charge your phone, it’s because you were physically incapable of charging it. What if something really bad happened? What if you were shot somewhere else? Jason knows Crane wanted you taken care of, maybe he shot you twice but you’re really good at hiding your pain when you need to. Adrenaline probably kicked in and shock, you were scared for Tim. Maybe you didn’t realize how bad it was. What if there was a complication of some sort and something bad happened?

Jason’s mouth starts to water as his eyes burn. His brows pinch together hard as his teeth grind so hard his jaw starts to ache. He was brought back. But, a part of him really hates that he was. Would you want to be brought back? If you died, would you want to be brought back like him? Jason comes to a stop, trying to steady his own breathing as his leg aches and burns. The scars on his chest feel like he’s being cut open again. What if you don’t want to be brought back but Jason did anyway? What if you did, and he does nothing?

What if you did die?

If you did die…Gar would call him, right?

Gar would definitely call, Jason assures himself. Gar would call immediately if something were happening. He has the number now and Jason’s ringer is on with the vibration set to strong. He has no missed calls but he’s certain Gar would call. If not, he would have called Molly and Molly would have found a way to call Jason. If you were dead, one of them would call him.

And then Jason swallows his own heartbeat as his phone starts ringing.

Gar.

“Hey.” Jason clears his throat, trying to keep himself together as he tries to prepare himself for the worst news he’ll ever get. 

“Is she there?” Gar asks and Jason can hear the worry etched in his voice.

“Uh…no?” Jason questions and he’s not sure if he should be relieved or panicked with Gar not knowing where you are. At least he’s not calling to tell Jason you’re dead but that does not rule out you bleeding out in a ditch somewhere. “I told her to go with you.”

Gar sighs on the end, running a hand through his hair. “She took off. I thought maybe she went to find you but she was hurt and she’s not answering her phone. Molly hasn’t heard from her either.”

Jason already figured you wouldn’t go to Molly. If you went to Molly, she would worry, give you a look you don’t like, and you’d run away again anyway. The last thing you’d want to do is drag Molly into it further. But, Jason really hoped you’d have listened for once and just went with Gar. Or at least sent a text to one of them to let them know you’re okay or not.

“She hasn’t been around.” Jason keeps his voice quiet and he looks around his room as if the answer is going to be written on the walls.

“Uh…hey, I know this…might not be what it’s for, but can you track her? She was shot and we’re all really worried.” Gar’s voice is hesitant as he scrunches his nose, hating the idea of having Jason do it. It feels like an invasion of privacy, especially Gar being the one to ask but it’s a last-ditch effort.

Of course, Jason’s been thinking about it. But, something in him can’t get himself to do it. On the small chance you did shut your phone off, that means you don’t want to be found. Jason can’t overstep, he can’t intrude on you. Even if he is desperately wanting to because you could be dead. He thought maybe he’d give you twenty more minutes and then he’d just do it anyway.

“Have you looked for her?” Jason asks, eying his tablet you left out.

“No, I called you first.” Gar admits. Honestly, Gar doesn’t even know where to look but he knew Jason would.

With no one out looking for you, maybe they don’t have to track you and possibly invade your privacy. If you’re just blowing off steam or punishing yourself, Jason knows exactly where you’ll be. He figures, if him, Gar, and Molly can’t find you within an hour, checking all of your spots, he’ll use the tracker.

“Okay, you and Molly go look for her at her usual spots. Molly’ll know ‘em and I’ll check a few others. If we don’t find her in an hour, I’ll track her.” Jason nods his head on the other end.

“Do you think we’ll actually find her? I mean you know how she is.” Gar isn’t trying to be pessimistic but it’s been hours and he thought for sure, you would be with Jason.

Jason can feel the panic attack starting to course through his blood. His heart is racing and his hands are growing clammy and he’s getting unreasonably angry. It is not Gar’s fault because even on a good day, getting you to listen is like pulling fucking teeth, especially when it has to do with taking care of yourself. Jason knows this better than anyone but he’s mad anyway and he knows it’s the panic attack. You were fucking shot and he took off so he’s mad at himself for listening. And he’s mad that you were shot and Gar didn’t stop you. He can turn into a fucking tiger for fuck’s sake, couldn’t he have turned into a tiger to stop you? Tackled you to the ground and pinned you there, dragged you to the manor kicking and screaming if that’s what he had to do. You were shot and maybe you’re dead now and he didn’t help. And Jason didn’t fucking help.

“Fuck! Gar, then you should have fucking followed her!” Jason snaps and immediately feels bad about it but any part of him that should apologize is washed over with guilt and regret and more anger. “Just go fucking look for her with Molly and I’ll look other places.” Jason grabs his coat from the bed and heads for the door.

“Where should we start?” Gar is quiet on the other end.

“The zoo.” Jason spits right back without even thinking. “Start there, then the harbor and I’ll–” Jason cuts himself off as he swings the door open, seeing you right in front of him with bloodshot eyes and blood-stained clothes and hands.

Gotham never sleeps. It never stalls. Everything is always moving, always loud. There is always something going on, people always going from one spot to the next in their lives. In some ways, it’s a little comforting. A reminder that you are here. You are here and alive like all of the people you passed on your walk here living their own lives. On the other hand, you wish it were quiet sometimes. You wish it were quiet sometimes because everything seems too much sometimes and your skin crawls while your heart feels like it’s going to beat out your chest. Your head spins and everything feels too much. But, it was quiet in the basement. It was quiet in the tower before you were attacked. It was quiet in the tunnels. It was quiet when you found Jason. It was quiet when Tim was shot. Maybe quiet is the surrounding air grieving for the mess fate’s created.

So, you stand in Jason’s doorway because quiet with him, alive and breathing, has always been the safest place to be. You stand weakly, haunted by everything that’s happened as the very idea of existing physically pains the deepest parts of your heart.

It’s hard to go through the same shit all the time. You’re just supposed to be fine with it. It’s happened before and you got over it, so you can get over it again, right? At some point, someone reaches the end of their rope and you think you might be there. It is the same pain over and over again and it never gets any easier. Time passes and it all just hurts anyway. People say time heals everything but you don’t think that’s true because you think about your mom dying and it’s like the wind’s been kicked from your chest all over again. You remember Jason’s body and it’s like you're being waterboarded. Time doesn’t heal anything. It’s not even like you’re used to it. You were just traumatized and avoid thinking about everything so it doesn’t fucking hurt so much. But, even that’s just exhausting. Existing is hard and tiring and painful.

Maybe you’re just tired of being in pain.

Your bottom lip starts to quiver and you always felt safest with him. Even from your own thoughts. You never felt too much pain around him. He always knows exactly what to do and it’s all too much right now. Being alone doesn’t work anymore. So, you stare up at him as Jason’s brows pull together with a cross between worry and relief.

“Jason?” Gar calls. “You there?” Gar asks.

“I got her.” Jason says. “She’s here. I’ll call you later.” Jason says quickly before hanging up. “Hey.” Jason’s voice is soft and careful, noticing you’re not making eye contact with him.

You walk the couple of feet up to him as Jason keeps his stance, almost ready to do whatever you’ll need. And all you do is lean forward and rest your forehead against his chest. Jason lets out a breath and you’re able to pull one in for the first time. Jason rests his hand on your back, rubbing up and down slowly as he hears you sniffle against him.

“Gar was calling in a search party. Where the fuck were you?” Jason asks and he should have some sort of bite in his voice but he’s too worried and too relieved.

You look back up to him and shake your head. “Walking. I couldn’t-I couldn’t…do it.” Your jaw squares as you try to hold back your own tears. “S-sorry..I-I didn’t mean to…to, uh, worry you guys. I-I just…just couldn’t.”

Jason nods with understanding, looking you over and it doesn’t look like you took care of the gunshot wound. Your clothes are soaked and your hair is an utter mess. There’s blood on your face and he swears your cheeks are stained with tears and you actually look cold.

Jason rests his hand on your cheek and you finally meet his eyes. “You alright?” Jason asks softly.

“Hurts.” You mutter and his hand almost feels like it’s burning your cheek. He’s so warm.

“The gunshot?” Jason questions, almost afraid of the answer.

“Everything.” You answer weakly with defeat.

You've never seen his look on him before. His jaw is squared but it’s soft rather than harsh like he’d been trying to shatter his own teeth. His brows are pinched but not completely pulled together and they’re aimed downward, etched in worry. His eyes are scanning you over every few seconds as if he’s stuck between thinking you aren’t really here and terrified something really bad is about to happen. Jason Todd worries and you've seen him worried plenty of times but this is different. You've seen him scared, too, plenty of times. More times than you can really count. But, this is different. It’s a different look and it’s because it’s you. And that look alone, chops and hacks at the barrier holding you together until it finally crumbles at your feet.

“It’s all my fault, Jay.” You sputter as you feel your eyes starting to water again. “It’s all my fault and I really fucked up and Tim could die or he did die. I don’t even know cause I left and I’m a fucking coward for leaving and it’s all my fucking fault.” Your mouth waters and you can’t look at his eyes because it’s all too much. “And there was so much…blood again. And the last time…it was you and it was horrible and I lost you and I couldn’t do it again and it just hurts all the time.” You suck in a shaky breath. “And-and Gar would say it’s not my fault and he’d give me the look but it is my fault. And Dick would be mad at me and I deserve it but I can’t hear it right now because I don’t know if I can handle it. And….it’s just-it’s just my fault. And I don’t know if could save him but I tried and I tried to save you, too.” You sputter before a sob finally rips through your throat. It bounces against the walls in a strangled and broken wail as if the very life you've lived has finally taken its toll on you for the last time. Jason isn’t sure he can listen to it because it physically pains him to see and hear you like this.

“Y/n.” Jason tries to get out but you shake your head.

“I tried really fucking hard to save you and it didn’t work. And I had to call Bruce and beg him to help me and he couldn’t and it was so fucking horrible and painful and scary.” You try to suck in a breath as tears scatter down your face. Everything is just wet and ugly, and burning. “It was so bad and I was so alone.” You suck in a ragged breath, your voice cracking and breaking between sobs. “Because Molly didn’t know and fuck Bruce and Gar wasn’t here. I was so alone and it was so scary because there was so much blood and brain matter.” Jason almost winces hearing it. “I don’t know if I would have been able to recognize you if you didn’t have the fucking Robin suit. It was so fucking bad and it hurts to think about and believe it happened but you’re here. And then Tim gets shot and there’s so much blood and I had to ask Dick to help and it’s like I’m there with your body again and it’s scary and it’s painful and I hate it. I hate how much it hurts. I hate doing this. I hate that it keeps happening.” Your chest heaves as you look at Jason with tears soaking your cheeks and your eyes finally meet his. And all Jason can see is defeat. “What if it just keeps happening?”

Jason shakes his head and every single time he is reminded you were the one that found him, he sends himself into a guilt-ridden spiral. Of course, you found him. That isn’t the issue. The issue is what it looked like from your perspective and the devastation it caused. He knows. He knows what it is like to find someone you love dead. He knows and it’s horrible and painful and devastating. It makes someone feel completely hopeless and helpless and useless. There has never been a time where he felt more helpless. And then he put you in that same position, not on purpose. But, he did and it was worse because it was gorey and traumatizing and he left you. He didn’t realize how badly it had traumatized you. It traumatized him, too but it affects you.

Dying doesn’t just happen to the person that’s dead. It happens to everyone around them.

“I’m so sorry.” Jason says softly, sliding his hand off your cheek. He shakes his head, biting his own tongue because he almost wants to cry with you. “I’m fucking sorry.” Jason wraps his arm around your shoulders as he pulls you into him. He’s careful not to hug you too tight, minding the gunshot wound he knows he’ll be taking care of for you later. “You’re not coward.” Jason manages to get out as he tries to come up with an answer for you even though he doesn’t think he’ll ever have one. The reality is that it will keep happening.

“Yeah, I am.” You argue back before you look up at him. “What fucking person just leaves as their friend is bleeding on the ground?”

“Someone who’s fucking traumatized.” Jason bites back. “Someone who was also fucking shot and in shock. You tried to help him and me knowing the shit you’d get for it. You fucking knew I went after the Joker and you show up alone, ready to take him on by your fucking self if you had to. You think that makes you a coward? What’s that make me then, huh?” Jason questions back, knowing you’ll never think of him as a coward, even if he sees that in himself sometimes.

“Not a coward but that’s different.” You argue.

“Fucking how?” Jason spits back. “You left Tim with Dick and the rest of the Titans who would know what to do. You were also fucking shot.” Jason shakes his head.

Jason wonders if this is what it's like dealing with him sometimes. Going round and round, circling the drain into a self-destructive spiral that only seems to have one result. It's not that he minds, it's that you think this. You're anything but a coward and Jason can't even figure out how you could think otherwise. You always do what you think is best for yourself and for the people you care about. Always. And you fight tooth and nail, as hard and as fast as you possibly can for what you believe. That's not cowardly.

“I-I know but…” You sniffle as you shake your head. “H-how can I keep doing this? I mean…losing people and the blood and….how can I do this for other people when I can’t even save the people I love?” You ask bluntly. “That’s shit, you know? We’re supposed to be out helping people and…and I can’t even…I fail with the people that matter. So, what’s the point?”

Jason would be lying if he doesn't question what the point is half the time, especially over the last few days. What's the point of living if this is even how it plays out? Pain and chaos, destruction and lonelienss. It's all pretty miserable, actually. But, he holds on anyway because it wasn't always like this.

Shit gets bad and then it gets better and yeah, it is exhausting sometimes. But, it's always gotten better. Jason doesn't know how much better it'll get from here now but he won't tell you that. He just knows he wakes up and he tries because you were nearly beaten an inch from your life and you find so much joy and love in small things that that alone seems to give Jason some sort of hope. And because Gar's family was killed and Gar was experimented on and he is the most optimistic person he has ever met. And because Molly lived on the streets with the death of her parents and Molly is the nicest person Jason has ever met. If all of these people can just be better after everything, than he can't very well just give up. And you can't either. Maybe there isn't a point but you'll never know if you give up.

“You know what you told me? You are the one that said sometimes we fail, that’s part of the job. But, we try.” Jason licks his lips as he sucks in a breath. “You talked me off the roof. Maybe Deathstroke would have tried to kill me or done worse shit if it weren’t for you. Fucking Pete Hawkins bullshit. The kid at Jerry’s. You were the one that fought tooth and fucking nail to save Gar. And you did, by the way. You saved Tim at Excellent Gotham. You failed two fucking times but by my count, you win more often.”

“Three times.” You correct him, earning you a glare. “Gar got kidnapped, we failed then…too.”

“You were both tranquilized and they used kryptonite on Krypto. I don’t think that counts.” Jason nods his head.

“I guess.” You let out a breath, looking to your shoes. “I just, uh,” You sniffle as you shake your head, looking back to him. “I just want the pain to stop.” Your voice cracks again.

Jason doesn’t say it, but he does, too. So, he wraps his arms around you and pulls you into him.

You press your cheek to his chest, wrapping your arms around him as your breathing is still rapid and ragged. But, you can hear his heartbeat in between breaths. It’s fast but steady. A lot quicker than it usually is but it is there. A few more tears leak out as you count his heartbeat and are fully engulfed by his warmth. You hadn’t realized just how numb you had gotten from the cold until now. Your fingers and toes are starting to feel like painful pins and needles. Your arms are burning and your cheek sting from the salty tears. It’s as if you're thawing from his warmth. Between that and his steady heartbeat, you calm yourself down.

“I can try to help.” Jason whispers softly. “If you’ll have me.” Jason pulls away just enough to look down at you and your eyes meet his.

You told him before that you’d come for everything that ever hurt him if it came to it. Anyone that ever wanted to hurt him, would have to go through you. Because he was just Jason Todd to you. It didn’t matter that he could -- should have been able to -- take care of himself. And Jason knew that’s how it was for him, too. Anyone who wants to hurt you, has to go through him. But, the problem is that someone did hurt you…because of him. And he hurt you. Right now you're in pain and it’s because of him. It’s not right and it’s not fair to you but Jason wants to protect you. He’d cut out pieces of his heart and glue them to yours if it would make you feel better. He would do anything in this world if it would make your pain less. Any form of pain that wants to come for you, is going to have to go through him first. From now on.

You nod your head. “Always.” You croak out.

“Come on.” Jason releases his arms and cold rushes itself right back over your body. “Sit on the bed, I’ll grab you some clothes and supplies to clean that shit. We’ll start there.”

“Thanks, Jay.” You mutter softly, walking to the bed and Jason watches you carefully.

He wonders if this is how it always felt for you. He’d come home bloody and bruised, weak and pitiful. Scared and in pain. He never said anything but Jason knows you always knew. Somehow, you always knew when he was hurt and scared. But, it was always him walking through the door hurt, not you. And it was you that would stitch him up. Sure, he’s helped you with your hands, but you did it at least twice a week for months. And you never complained. But, Jason wonders if this is what it feels like.

It feels like he’s carrying the weight of the world for the both of you and he’s trapped in a worrying spin. And he is so fucking sad for you. It’s not pity, but just sadness. It’s wanting the best for you and you to have everything good in this world because you deserve it. And wanting to witness it because he loves you. It’s just wanting to see you smile and happy, making some stupid joke and telling him to fuck off. It’s just wanting you to not be in pain anymore. He wonders if this is how it felt being you and if so, he wants to know so badly how the fuck you dealt with it because he feels like he’s suffocating while he grabs you clothes.

Jason walks back over to you, handing you a pair of sweatpants and a red hoodie. “I got first aid shit in the bathroom so change and I’ll be back.” Jason nods his head at you.

“Okay.” You answer weakly and Jason hesitates for a few seconds before he practically runs off to the bathroom.

You're weak and unsteady as you change into the sweats. You're realizing you haven’t eaten in a while and you haven’t had much to drink either. That’s definitely not helping your mental state and you know it. But, if you were being really honest, none of those activities sound like things you're currently capable of doing. Changing is even almost too much effort at this point. And it fucking hurts as you try to take your shirt off to swap it for the hoodie.

“Need help?” Jason appears right back not two minutes later.

You always hated feeling helpless but not around him. “Yeah, it hurts.” You sniffle softly, sitting pitifully on the bed.

Jason walks over, resting the kit beside you before he lightly grabs the hem of your hoodie. Jason helps you tug it off of your bad shoulder and then over your head, you groaning the entire time. With the hoodie off, you're left in a blue t-shirt and Jason sees where the bullet hole is, covered in red and brown. With the chaos of last night, he didn’t check and wasn’t able to check if the wound was a through and through. Jason's stomach twists at the thought that it's not. But, he hides his worry, looking back to you with a soft sigh.

“How did you wanna do this?” Jason asks bluntly.

Your brows furrow in confusion. “I-I don’t know?” You shake your head.

“I can’t clean it with your shirt on.” Jason sucks in a breath and normally he’d have some comment about seeing you half naked again but he can’t quite muster it this time.

“Oh…” You whisper and you swear it’s fine. It’s not like you haven’t seen each other naked before and it’s not like you didn’t see Jason fully exposed just the other night. There is something that just feels…new and vulnerable again. “That’s fine.” You nod and Jason leans forward again, tugging the hem of your shirt up and over your head, freeing your arm. You grab Jason's hoodie with your good arm and Jason helps tug it onto your good arm, you thankful it's a zip-up and not a pullover. “Guess that’ll do.” You suck in a breath and you're kind of tired of feeling like this. “I expect you to actually help and not just stare at my tits the whole time.”

Jason manages a cheeky smirk. “You know I’m ass guy anyway.” Jason glances down and then back to you.

“Shithead.” You mutter and Jason’s head swims. It’s been so long since you've called him that and it almost feels nostalgic.

“Babe.” Jason quips back.

Jason takes out his phone, examining the gunshot now that there isn’t anything in the way. There’s still blood everywhere and he can’t even tell if it’s because you did such a shit job at cleaning it or if the wound is actually that bad. Something in his stomach twists and turns into a gnawing pain at the thought this is worse than he originally thought. But, he keeps a straight face, not to let his worry cross even a single line of his face. When he worries, you worry.

Jason grabs a wet rag from the bowl he brought in with him, gently cleaning around the area to try to get a better look. You let out a shaking breath, the water cool against your skin.

“Sorry, no hot water.” Jason barely glances to you as he scrubs some of the dry blood away.

“Should probably fix that.”

“Pilot lights are expensive.”

“I have Bruce’s credit card.” You mutter quietly, earning a look from Jason.

He stops, looking up at you fully. “You would.”

“Eat the rich.” You shrug. “Or take their money when it’s offered to you and he didn’t ask for it back.” Jason lets out a snicker before he goes back to cleaning. “You should use yours. It might send up a red flag for Bruce and maybe he’ll call someone back or come back.”

You hate the words as they leave your lips because wanting Bruce back means admitting defeat. But, Gotham has gone to absolute shit since Bruce decided to fuck off somewhere. At least Gotham had some degree of fear and respect for the Bat. They don't seem to like the Titans very much. And Jason's been off his rocker and you've been stuck trying to help him. Gotham does need someone they respect. Bruce should definitely come back. And if for no other reason, to see his son is alive again.

Jason scoffs. “Yeah, fucking right.” He shakes his head in annoyance. “Fuck Bruce. I don’t need him.”

Before he died, he was getting better about talking about his problems and the things that kept him up at night. He was doing better with it but then he comes back and the very idea of talking about it makes him want to crash through a window headfirst onto solid pavement. In all fairness, he already hated talking about Bruce. It was one thing to complain about him but it was an entirely other thing to unravel and dig into actually talking about him. Now, though, it’s worse because every time Jason thinks about Bruce, it’s as if his heart starts to break all over again.

Maybe him getting bludgeoned death was his fault. He knew better. But, where was Bruce? Bruce gave up on him. And then…was going to let the Joker just…live. Jason was supposed to be Bruce’s son and he couldn’t even kill the Joker for him or do anything about him. And maybe, just maybe, Jason could get over that eventually but Jason’s alive again and Bruce is nowhere to be found. With everything going on in Gotham, Jason is certain Dick would have called Bruce and let him know. If for no other reason than to rat Jason out to “dad”. So, maybe Jason feels like he was always a little expendable to Bruce, not just Crane or the Titans. And that part hurts the most.

“Didn’t say you did?” You let out a breath. “Just saying is all.” You pull in a deep breath. “Fuck Bruce, yeah. Just saying.” You, for one, still hate Bruce but Jason hating Bruce seems weird. You chalked it up to the drug at first and Crane but…Jason’s clean. It’s weird, even for Jason. “What’s your sudden issue with Bruce anyway?”

“You got a problem with me having a problem with Bruce all of a sudden?” Jason spits back and he shouldn’t, given your current state but his heartache over being abandoned by him is fresh.

“Oh, no. I am actually fine with that cause fuck Bruce but it’s weird. After all of that shit, you come back and suddenly don’t like him. That’s weird, Jay. Even for you.”

“Never fucking mattered to him. I was always just the replacement for Dick anyway. Doesn’t fucking matter.” Jason dips the rag into the water, rinsing some of the blood off before going back to the wound.

You furrow your brows, trying to figure out where that’s even coming from. “Uh…not true? Bruce is a fucking weirdo and shit but I actually think he gives a shit about you, Jay. Outside of Robin and Dick. You always said that, too. Like deep down you knew that, so what is it now?”

Jason grows more and more angered but he knows you aren’t going to drop it. “You were fucking right, alright?” Jason snaps back. “Should have killed the fucking Joker because he killed me. So fuck him.” Jason keeps his explanation short.

“Right yeah, had he just killed him, you wouldn’t have died and it doesn’t make up for it because too little, too late shit, but like…he did—“

“Can you fucking drop it, please?” Jason’s words come out more as a demand rather than a request. “I’m done fucking talking about it.” Jason looks at your shoulder from your back, seeing there’s no hole in the fabric.

“Sorry.” You say softly. It just doesn’t sit right with you. You’d still be pissed at Bruce, too because had he killed the Joker in the first place that wouldn’t have happened but that’s…not really Jason. He doesn’t hold many grudges and Bruce did kill the Joker. It was a little late for that but he did, to avenge Jason. Bruce didn’t throw his morals away for Dick, he threw them away for Jason and that would normally mean something to him. It’s weird but you know when to push and when not to. You're not in the mood to fight it anyway. “Just thought it was weird, is all.”

“It’s fine. Sorry.” Jason squints at the wound, seeing something shine back at him and his heart plummets. He grabs his phone, shining a light into the wound again. “The bullet is still inside.”

“Figured.” You let out a breath.

“I have to take it out.”

Your eyes land on his and you know this is about to suck. “Okay.” You nod your head.

“Lay back and hold the phone so I can see.” Jason hands you his phone as you do as told.

Jason grabs a pair of tweezers from the kit and he looks at the wound, grabbing your wrist to make sure the light is in the right position. Jason’s stomach twists into a hard knot, knowing how bad this is going to hurt. His leg starts to throb with the very thought of putting you through it. But, it has to be done. You're not going to go to an actual doctor for help and if he leaves the bullet in, it can lead to infection. So, Jason sucks in a deep breath and bends down hovering over the wound, careful not to block the light.

“It’s gonna hurt.” Jason glances up at you.

“Just do it.” You sigh, looking to the ceiling as your grip on his phone tightens.

Jason nods his head before gently sticking the tweezers into the wound. You slam your eyes shut as your jaw clenches. Your right hand grips onto the blanket beneath you as Jason moves the tweezers around. It’s burning and stinging like getting stung by a thousand hornets at once. It’s as if you're being shot in the spot over and over again as tears well behind your eyes. Jason is trying to be careful and quick, but the bullet is slippery thanks to the blood.

Your hand starts to shake as your breath grows rapid and uneven. You try your best to concentrate on anything besides the pain but that’s becoming increasingly more difficult. It was different when you were in the fight for your life. It was do or die and people can do absolutely insane things they should not have been able to accomplish in life or death situations. Your life isn’t in danger right now and even when you try to focus on something else, the tweezers move just enough and you're brought back to agonizing pain.

Given the events that happened, it’s hard for you to focus on anything other than the pain you're been in. You try to think of the good times but then those are tarnished like rusted silverware. Those good memories now come with pain, too. You try to focus on what you’re going to do about Crane because maybe that would kick in your fighting instincts but you're the one lying in a bed right now after being shot by him. Everything around you feels like it’s rusting and chipping away into a toxic pile of reds and browns. Tainted, tarnished, and broken.

Jason glances up to you and he can see the agony written in every wrinkle and pinch of your skin. And he can’t see with the phone basically vibrating in your hand. All he can even feel is anger and not at you. It’s entirely on him and Crane because at the end of the day, it’s his fault and Crane’s how you ended up here. You never should have been shot. You were only there to look out for him. You and Tim were collateral damage. So many people around Jason end up just being collateral damage. And they don’t deserve it. But, at the end of the day, he isn’t the one that pulled the trigger at you and all he wants to do is go right after Crane. Make him feel the same pain he’s put you through. And then worse.

“Y/n.” Jason says, sternly. “You have to stop moving. I can’t see.”

You swallow thickly, trying to stabilize your hand. “Sorry.” You manage to mutter through your gritted teeth.

Jason goes back to the wound but the second he sticks the tweezers into the flesh, you wince and flinch as hard you try to stay still. Jason is no stranger to this and he knows it is agonizing to pick something out of an open wound. Nerves and flesh are exposed that should not be. It’s horrendous and seconds feel like hours. And it’s triggering phantom pain in his leg as his heart feels like it’s being suffocated with barbed wire. He knows it’s bad when you're the one who can’t sit still.

Jason pulls back, putting the tweezers back in the kit before he cups your cheeks. He bends down so his face is just an inch from yours and you open your eyes slowly, your jaw still clenched and tears threatening to finally fall.

“You gotta stay still or I’m never gonna be able to get it out.” Jason’s voice is stern.

“It fucking hurts.” Your voice cracks weakly as you sniffle.

“You were almost beaten to death. This isn’t gonna fucking kill you. You’ll be fine.” Jason nods his head once at you before he presses his forehead to yours for just a second.

You nod weakly at him. “Yeah…”

“Just…stay still and I’ll be quick, alright?” Jason asks, seeing the doubt across your face. “I got you.” Jason offers a weak smile.

“Okay.” You nod your head in agreement.

Jason nods once more before he goes back to your wound. He focuses on the bullet while the tweezers hover above you and you can’t help but notice the lack of shaking in his hands. Come to think of it, you aren’t sure the last time you saw his hand so steady. Jason has always been so steady around you. An unmovable force.

Jason looks back to you, raising his brows as if silently asking if you if you're ready and all you do is nod quickly before looking back to the ceiling. Your grip tightens on the phone while you lock in place with all of your might just to try to stay steady.

The tweezers stick back into the bloody wound, carefully and steadily as they go right to the bullet. Jason keeps his eyes laser-focused on just getting the bullet out and you grit your teeth together as tears come to your eyes. But, you suck in a deep breath as you feel the metal scraping around the wound, clinging onto every part your self-control in order to stay steady. That’s when Jason finally is able to grab the bullet, pulling it out in a steady motion, careful not to drop it.

Jason holds the bullet with the tweezers as a triumphant grin comes to his lips. You peek your eyes open at him, the whites turning a bright shade of pale pink.

“Told you I got you.” Jason shrugs casually but the grin quirks into a cheeky smirk.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah thanks.” You roll your eyes as you sniffle.

“You alright?”

“Yeah, that shit was just, uh painful. I really don’t recommend getting shot.” You lay the phone down beside you before rubbing your right eye.

“Yeah, don’t plan on it.” Jason quips back. “Probably stop hurting soon without the bullet.”

“Be nice.” You let out a sigh. “And Dick really just went to bed like this. What a fucking psycho.”

"Yeah, but you went MIA." Jason narrows his eyes at you because maybe he is a little mad at you for it. They were all worried. He was worried. "You bitch about him but--"

“If you fucking say it, Jason Todd, I’ll kill you again.” You deadpan. “You two are the ones that are oddly similar, okay?”

Jason lets out a scoff. “Bullshit. I’m nothing like him.”

You roll your eyes. “Yeah, you are. You’re different but you’re similar. You just don’t wanna see it. What? You never looked up to him before all of this shit?” You ask.

Jason sits back on his heels, dropping the bullet in the first aid kit with the tweezers to toss and clean later. “What’s to look up to?” Jason scoffs. “Being a fucking kiss ass and a goody two-shoes.”

“Because he was the first Robin.” You state casually. “Yeah, yeah, yeah, about you replacing him and shit whatever. But, didn’t you ever look up to him for even a little bit?”

Jason hangs his head and while he’s always felt less than and a bit like a failure when it came to filling his shoes, he definitely did look up to him. Dick created something so special and surreal when it came to Robin. He wasn’t Batman, he was just a kid in a suit helping Batman and that was cool. Then Bruce had all of these stories about Dick and it always made Jason want to be like him because Dick was good. That’s how Bruce always talked anyway. Jason doesn’t know that Bruce always talked about Jason in the same way when he wasn’t around. And Dick doesn’t know how Bruce would talk about him to everyone else. But Jason heard the stories and how great Dick was. He never wanted to be exactly like him but he definitely wanted to be somewhat like him. Dick’s parents were killed and he got to be Robin. By all that Jason heard, it seemed he made it out of it okay. He had Robin and he got to carry that with him. He got to have a career in helping people (kind of). Jason did want to be like him but the way he sees it, there’s a reason people say not to meet your heroes.

“Still mad about the Joker shit but…uh,” You sniffle again. “Don’t know, be a lie if I said I didn’t look up to him…and you.”

“Me?”

“I always liked your Robin.” You say quietly. “You were different. Felt like we needed your version. But I told you that.”

“Surprised you still think it.”

“I think we need someone like Red Hood.” You state, catching Jason entirely off guard.

“What? Another fucking murderer?” Jason scoffs, looking to the window above the bed before he looks back to you.

He feels so ashamed of it all at times, like right now. It's because you're the one lying here after being shot by someone Jason thought he could trust. He knows deep down, crime in Gotham needs a change. The Bat doesn't fix everything, clearly. There needs to be someone out there that is willing to do more but Jason isn't sure that's him. He already burned his bridges. He doused them in gasoline and lit a match with a smile. He feels like he's on the wrong side and there's nothing he can do to rebuild that bridge to be on the right side anymore. If there's even a right side.

“No. Someone who’s willing to do the heavy and bad shit in order to prevent worse shit from happening. Like I said, I’m not just killing people for you, it’s for all of us and everyone that will come after us. I think we need people like that and people are afraid of you and rightfully so. I dunno. Just my take, I guess.”

“Been thinking about the people I killed.” Jason lets out a breath. “Heavy shit.”

“Yeah, but a lot of that is greater good shit and the other stuff is Crane’s manipulation so you shouldn’t feel too guilty for those.” You shrug your good shoulder.

Jason shakes his head and he doesn't how you deal with any of it. You don't normally deal with much, if Jason is being honest. But, you seem to be dealing with this pretty okay. Somewhere in him, he always felt like if someone were going to go on a killing spree, you would probably be that person. Your morals have never aligned with Dick's or Bruce's. You've always felt like more could be done, permanently. But, Jason's surprised you seem so okay with it and with him killing people.

“How the fuck are you dealing with it?”

You let out a broken laugh. “I’m not.” You answer honestly. “So much shit is happening that I just…can’t.” You shake your head. “Can’t think about it.”

Jaso nods with understanding. “Yeah.” Jason sucks in a breath, deciding to drop the conversation. It feels too much again. Too loud. Too heavy. “Stay still.” Jason leans forward, grabbing the rag before he starts cleaning her wound again.

You watch him carefully. He’s not handling anything well which you can’t say you really blame him for. You wonder what you would be doing if you were in his position. How would you ever forgive yourself for not only everything that’s happened but also being manipulated? Being manipulated isn’t Jason’s fault but you know he’s probably blaming himself for it because you would be blaming yourself for it if it were you. You wonder how he feels about coming back. You haven’t really talked about it and part of that is you're just afraid to ask because talking about him dying nearly sends you into a spiraling panic attack. But, you wonder how he’s dealing with that and if he’s happy he’s back.

Jason’s hands are steady as he grabs the gauze, his brows pinched together with concentration as he goes back to the wound and you find yourself wondering if you were meant to be anyway. Everything seemed so much easier in San Francisco. You weren’t together then and it was all just fun and games. Sure, you both were kidnapped and that was bad. But, that was one thing. Meanwhile, being together in Gotham has been a shitshow since the start almost. Maybe it’s just the butterfly effect but you wonder if it was just you both trying to find solace in each other or if it was as real as it’s always felt. Maybe you were just feeding off of each other’s own self-destruction and avoidance. Maybe being together helped the other one crumble.

Your eyes scan over his face and you realize, you don’t remember the last time you saw his face bruised. But, while you were together, he was always littered in them and almost always had one somewhere on his face like a Jackson Pollock. That solidifies the thought of you. Maybe you weren’t meant to be after all. Maybe you were actually bad for each other. Maybe you being together really was just you both self-destructing, knowing damn well one of you would die and it would destroy you. Maybe being together was always a way to hurt yourselves in the worst way.

And that hurts worse than the gunshot.

You've always been so sure about him. Even when you weren't sure, a part of you was. It was always supposed to be him. Him and you. But, you were shot and you're thinking a lot about how people's lives might be better if you weren't in them anymore. You're thinking about how things might be better for Jason if you weren't together. You skew your own reality, convincing yourself you got together in order to hurt yourselves. That's all it could possibly be. You ignore every thought about you confessing how loving him is the easiest thing you'd ever done. You push every thought of every soft moment you have ever had into the darkest part of your mind where they can be tainted and painted over. You push away everything Jason has ever told you and goes against everything Jason has ever believed about himself and what he deserves. It all feels like lies to yourself. It was just self-destruction because that has to be it, right?

You go back and forth with yourself. One part of you thinking this must be fact and the other part of you thinking it's just because it's a bad day. Everything feels worse on bad days and it is so easy to push everything good into a dark corner and paint right over it as if it were something different entirely. And today is a bad day. So, a part of you screams and begs for you to just ask Jason because Jason wouldn't lie. If it was all just self-destruction, Jason would tell you. He wouldn't lie about it.

“Do you think we were just a consequence of our own self-destruction?” You ask quietly, moving your eyes to the ceiling. "Or...was it like....real?"

Jason hears the question and pauses. He almost questions if he heard you correctly but he glances back to you and you're avoiding his stare which means he definitely did. His heart sinks and he thinks he forgot how to breathe for a second. Do you actually think that? Jason isn’t sure what would hurt more at this point. You thinking that’s all you were to him or that being all you were to you.

“What?” Jason asks, more for clarity.

“I mean like…exactly, uh, what I said. Do, uh, d-do you think we were just a consequence of our own self-destruction?” You chew the inside of your cheek and you regret asking. “Or…was it all real?”

The question hangs in the air like the blade of a guillotine, just waiting for one of you to pull the rope and end it all. The air starts to feel stale and cold and heavy as Jason doesn’t move, processing the question.

He’s not entirely sure where that question is even coming from. This whole time, you've wanted nothing more than him and you've said that. You have told him that he is all you have ever wanted. Why would you just be a consequence? Was he just a consequence?

Jason sits all the way up, coming into view. “Do you think that?” Jason asks bluntly as his breath hangs in the stagnant air. It’s as if he is clawing at the last remaining parts of his voice to remain steady and not shatter and break.

You look back to him, following the hollowed lines of worry of his face. You aren’t sure he’s breathing and you regret asking the question. You don’t even know why you asked in the first place. It’s not like you actually want to know because sometimes not knowing is just better, less painful. And the look on his face isn’t making you feel any better because he looks torn between devasted and angry.

“I asked you first.” You say quietly.

“No.” Jason states bluntly, almost harshly.

Being with you was never him self-destructing. In Jason’s eyes, as much as it all got fucked up in the end, being with you healed more parts of him than he ever thought possible. Being with you actually healed parts of him he swore would never be put together no matter how hard he tried. You made him better. He got to be who he wanted to be with you and shamelessly, you fully accepted him. And he really thought, he could be that version of himself forever because you always convinced him he could. You made him want to put in a hard effort into coming home and thinking twice before doing something a little too reckless, outside of the whole Crane and Joker thing. You showed him what it was like to be loved without conditions. And Jason loves you still. No conditions. No consequence. No self-destruction. He loves you yesterday, today, and he is positive he’ll love you tomorrow and every day after that because he wants to.

“Do you?” Jason asks, choosing not to elaborate.

You swallow a lump in your throat. Despite your own negative thoughts, you know you don't. Not really. Maybe you thinking it is a self-destruction thing, maybe it's your way of trying in order to punish yourself for Tim and everything else. But, no. Of course, not.

“No.” Your voice is quiet and fragile, making Jason’s heart sink because he knows there’s a but coming. “But, uh..we just…we ended up here.” You let out a scoff. “And, uh, I don’t know.” You shake your head. “We said some pretty fucked up shit to each other and I know…uh, I know you were high but, uh…yeah.”

Devasted. That’s all Jason can feel because he’s one of the reasons you even asked. He knows he said some horrible shit to you and he can’t take any of it back. Words are long-lasting. They enter the air and stick to it, absorbing itself into your lungs as you pull in a breath and let it fester there. That’s where the words start and travel to your brain where they store away, pecking at you just at the right moments. No one can take words back and Jason knows that. But, he has to try anyway even if he doesn't think it’ll salvage you. You have to know you meant and mean the entire world to him still.

“I didn’t mean any of that shit, okay? I swear, I didn’t fucking mean it.” Jason states quickly. “I was fucking high and I just wanted to fucking hurt you which is fucked up and I’m fucking sorry.” Jason spits out quickly but with a fire. There is no relief coming to your face and even if you are nothing to each other after this is over, he needs you to believe him. Jason cups your face. “I fucking swear. We weren’t a fucking mistake and you were the best thing that happened to me and I fucked that up. That’s on me. You made me better. I’m fucking so sorry, alright?”

You nod against his hand. And you know. You were also high and none of the shit you said is true. You didn't mean any of it. You didn't even mean the shit you said while you were sober. Maybe it's just a part of you that needs it to be verified today.

“I know and I’m sorry, too. I don’t know. I just get thinking about it, I guess. We both ended up here and it’s just…” You suck in a breath. “I know.” You place your hands over his. “Because I said some horrible shit, too, and then I hit you. And uh…I know. It’s just…that on top of everything else that happened. Like…” You shrug softly. “You died, Jason.”

Jason drops his hands, shaking his head, putting the pieces together. There is no way in hell you really think him going off on his own is your fault. Every piece of that shit plan, was on Jason. It was on him to just wait and get help. It was on him to reach out and get help. It was on him not to trust Crane. Everything was on him. That's not for you to carry.

“You don’t really think that shit is on you, right?”

“I should have seen it.” You sputter. “I should have fucking known, Jay. And the more I think about it, the more I think maybe I did know and maybe I just…let it happen to teach you a lesson about being dumb out there and—“

“Stop.” Jason cuts you off sharply. “You would never let me go after the fucking Joker by myself. You never would have even if you wanted to teach me some lesson. And I don’t think that’s it either. You do the same shit I do.” Jason scoffs. “I went after him. By myself. I do what I always did. I went after him. Alone, And I died alone. Because I never fucking ask for help. That’s not on you. And it’s got nothing to fucking do with us.”

“Yeah, but if you were me?” You question. “You’d be thinking the same thing. There were so many signs and I just…somehow missed every single one of them. I have to think I ignored them and maybe not to teach you a lesson but because I was scared.”

Jason sucks in a breath and he knows you're right because if it were him, he’d never forgive himself. If the roles were reversed, he’d also be questioning how he missed it and maybe he let you do it. Maybe he ignored the signs on purpose. Jason, being on the side he is, knows for a fact you didn’t willfully ignore any sign. You have shown him time and time again that if you have any say in it, you’d never let something happen to him. But, Jason understands why you think that so he sucks in a breath and decides to take some of that Gar advice for once.

“I remember what I was thinking about while the Joker was playing whack-a-mole with my head.” Jason mutters, earning him a grimace and a glare from you.

“Really?” You give him a displeased look.

Jason shrugs. “Well…” Jason sucks in a breath with the quick raise of his brows.

“You do though?” You ask cautiously.

Jason nods. “Yeah, I…I remember everything.” Jason swallows the growing lump in his throat. “Told you that, but…yeah.” Jason nods quickly. “Remember thinking I should have just listened to you. I should have told you because you would have talked me out of it, you would have told Bruce and Dick. I’d be pissed…but you would have helped and I wouldn’t be getting killed. So…just fucking saying,” Jason sucks in a breath and goes back to your wound. “Me dying had nothing to fucking do with you and there was nothing you could have done differently. We weren’t a consequence our own self-destruction. I’m really fucking sorry for all of the shit I’ve put you through.”

Your brows furrow and your heart starts to break again. It must be a horrible task to wake up every single day with memories, even down to final thoughts, about literally dying. You know it’s your own personal hell at this point but the idea of Jason reliving it every single day…it’s worse. And the fact he brought it up without you asking, you know.

“I forgive you, Jay.” You say quietly. “And I really, really, mean that, okay? Your, uh…your last thoughts…were regret?” You ask cautiously.

Jason shakes his head. “No.” Jason answers plainly. “Not all of them.” Jason lets out a breath. The last thing Jason wants is to talk about how the last thing he remembers is knowing he was going to die. You don't need to know that, that's for damn sure.“I-I don’t want to talk about it though. I really just needed you to know that.”

“Thank you, Jay." You watch him carefully, seeing something distant and broken cloud over his eyes. His brows pull together as if he's in pain and his hand starts to shake. You hope he'll talk about it one day. Maybe being brought back isn't all it's cracked up to be. "When you do want to talk, please talk t me.”

“I will.” Jason nods his head at you once before finishing up the wound.

“Maybe we were both just ticking time bombs to get here.” You suck in a breath. “I don’t think we were a consequence and it was real for me. I just…had to ask I guess.”

“Maybe we kept each other from getting here.” Jason nearly mutters the words under his breath before he goes back to fixing up your wound.

You let the silence fill the room as you think about it because maybe he’s right. It wasn’t until he died the two of you fell off the deep end. Sure, things weren’t great for you both mentally but maybe you together helped stabilize some part of you both. Maybe being together was the glue you both needed like a kintsugi sculpture. Putting broken pieces back together to be better than they were before. You both ended up here but maybe that’s better.

In the last two weeks, the two of you have learned more about each other and life and the consequences of everything. Maybe that’s how it was supposed to be. So, you both could be better people today. Maybe you both rely too much on each other to help you mend your broken pieces but that doesn’t mean you were bad together or you were the cause of this. That doesn’t mean who you both are today is worse. Maybe who you both are today is better because it’s honest.

You both are scared but you both are honest and you aren’t letting your fears control every aspect of everything you do. You’re both standing up for yourselves in ways you didn’t think you would. Jason is figuring out his shit now and standing where he should. Where he wants. He’s standing up against people who made him feel worthless, something he otherwise never did too much. Maybe this is who you both are meant to be in the end and maybe that’s not so bad.

“Done.” Jason backs away as you look down, seeing your shoulder bandaged. “Don’t get shot again.” Jason manages the tint of a smirk.

“Gee, I wonder why I didn’t think of that.” You mock him before you sit up and slide the hoodie on entirely.

“Yeah, you really fucking should have. I mean, get it together, babe.” Jason offers a little bit of snark, the smirk pulling at the corner of his mouth.

“Okay, fuck you.” You laugh softly. “Thank you.”

Jason nods his head. “Anytime.” Jason smiles softly at you.

You pull out your phone from your other hoodie and hand it to Jason. "It died and in the chaos, I dropped my charging block." You offer a guilty smile as Jason takes your phone and plugs it into his charger. “So, uh, what’re you gonna do about Crane? Like….fuck.” You roll your eyes.

“Kill him.” Jason spits.

“No.” You shake your head. “I was serious. I wanna kill him.”

“Seriously?” Jason quips.

“Yes. I’m sick of people making you think you’re some fucking monster when you’re not. And he fucking sucks anyway. He did everything to you, he almost got Dick killed, he’s gotten innocent people killed, he almost killed me, and he killed or almost killed Tim. Yeah, I’d like to kill him.” You let out a sigh. “I mean, if you really want to kill him for what he did to you, go for it just let me get a shot in. If it’s for me? Let me do it.”

“It’s kind of fucked we’re even having this conversation right now.” Jason chuckles. “Fine. But, I get a few fucking shots in. I meant what I said, no one gets to fuck with you again.”

“And I meant what I said. No one gets to fuck with you, Jason Todd.” You offer him a sweet smile, something that should feel off given you're talking about killing someone but instead, it brings Jason some sort of comfort.

A smirk grows onto his lips before it turns soft. “Can handle myself.”

“Okay, no the fuck you cannot.” You quip back as you let out a soft laugh. “Just because you can though, doesn’t mean you have to do it alone. I got you.” You smile softly at him. "You and me."

Jason remembers a night a few months ago and he was sitting in the library reading because things were just a little too heavy and loud that day. You walked in and started scrapbooking on the floor just so Jason wouldn't be alone. And he remembers thinking how peaceful it was, just the two of you. He remembers thinking he felt lucky.

In a world where he experiences so much pain and unfairness, he felt lucky in that moment and in every moment he got to spend with you. As much as he loves to beat himself up, especially these days, he'd like to think maybe he can be lucky again. Maybe he can be at peace again one day. If you keep on thinking this and keep a hold on him. If you're willing to not let him do this alone, just as you said all those months ago in San Francisco, maybe you can get back to where you were and maybe you both can be lucky and at peace. Maybe the universe will offer some sort of kindness for the suffering it's caused you both.

“What about the Titans?” Jason asks, clearing his throat and swallowing his own thoughts.

“Right, yeah, I uh, I need to talk to Dick still. I told them it was Crane last night, not sure really if they believed me or not. Hope so. I’m sure Gar did so that’s at least good.” You nod your head a few times, hating the idea of having to explain this whole thing to Dick. You're kind of tired of being the mediator.

“We could just go take out Crane ourselves.” Jason suggests casually as he gets up and walks to the other side of the room where he has a mini fridge seated against the wall.

"While that does sound like fun," You laugh softly because you wish you could actually just do that. It would probably put an end to all of this but Dick would lose his shit. “I have an idea.”

“I hate when you say that.” Jason groans as he grabs two bottles of Gatorade and a box of granola bars from the top of the fridge before he walks back over to you. Jason tosses the box and one of the Gatorades at you before he plops down and scoots himself so his back rests against the wall, his legs extending in front of him. "Assumed you haven't eaten or had anything to drink." Jason explains, cracking open his Gatorade while you do the same.

"Yeah, I haven't thank you." You give him a soft smile before you start explaining yourself, grabbing a granola bar before you start your ramble. “Taking Crane out would be a fun time and he deserves it and most of our problems would likely be solved. However, what if Dick is right? What if he does have something bigger planned that we don’t know about? And then we kill him and like…maybe he poisons everyone somehow or blows up the city? I don’t know. We kind of need to know. And knowing his whereabouts would also be kind of helpful. So, what if you just….side with him still? Be the inside guy, right? And then Dick will really believe us that it wasn’t you who shot us and you won’t have to worry about Dick trying to turn you in, I wouldn’t let him but still.”

Jason pauses, holding the open bottle of Gatorade to his mouth. He's pretty sure you're suffering blood loss because that's insane. It's about as insane as you saying he should take the drug to not go through withdrawal. You're losing your sanity. "He already poisoned the water." Jason states.

"He did what now?" You blink at him.

"Your phone died, yeah. The water is poisoned with something he did so don't drink it. GCPD put out an alert this morning." Jason explains.

"Oh, that's fun. Well, still. It's Crane. You know he has something completely insane planned. Probably." You scoot closer to Jason, sitting on your knees right beside him. 

“You want me to work with fucking Crane after he just tried to kill you? That’s fucking insane. Do you know that?” Jason questions with a groan. He wants nothing to do with Crane, even if he could get information from him.

“Yes.” You nod once.

“Fuck no.” Jason shakes his head in the same casual manner before snagging a granola bar.

“Jay, look, okay he thinks he can still manipulate you so let him think that and find out what he’s up to.”

“He won’t tell me shit.” Jason shakes his head in annoyance as he unwraps the granola bar.

“Maybe he will now. If he just tried to kill me and you go back to him anyway, right? Say I turned on you or whatever. That I think it was a setup against me so you wouldn’t have to be the one to pull that trigger. If he knows you’ll turn on me, maybe he’ll finally trust you enough to tell you what’s going on. You’re a pretty good liar sometimes.” You urge him and you know this is an insane idea but it's what you have. The Titans will never figure out Crane's plan without some inside help. They need it.

“You said I was shit liar.” Jason argues, pointing the granola bar at you.

“Well, to me.” You chuckle softly. “I always know when you’re lying but I think you can lie pretty well when you actually need to. I mean, no one figured out you were Robin. And I think that was obvious. I met you and all I thought was that it made sense.”

“This is fucking stupid.” Jason nods his head casually.

“Yeah, well, this whole thing has been fucking stupid. You go back to Crane, work with him and I’ll stay with the Titans. You call the burner when you find shit out and I loop Dick in. You don’t have to physically be home to work with us. You find out, the Titans bring in Crane and shut down whatever shit he’s got going on, then we kill him and you go home.” You explain simply and Jason hates just how convincing you can be.

You make a good point. Jason knows he can lie his ass off, he just wanted to argue. He's worried though because Crane has a way of knowing Jason is lying. It's how he found out about you from the beginning of it all. Jason couldn't just lie because Crane would know. It wasn't exactly a life-or-death situation then though. Maybe Jason wasn't trying all that hard to get away with lying then anyway. Crane admitting his plan would be helpful and Crane thinking you turned on Jason would give Jason enough motive to give up on the Titans entirely. It's not a horrible plan but Jason isn't happy about it.

“Alright fucking fine but this is shit and you know that.” Jason lets out a groan.

“I know.” You smile. “But, it’ll be worth it when his prodigie betrays him in the end.” You scrunch your nose, smiling with pride and Jason can see the light come back to your eyes. He thinks you're gonna be okay.

“You know, kinda hot when you got a plan all ready to go.” Jason offers you a cheeky smirk, his eyes raking over you before coming back to your face.

“I do have my moments.” You grin wickedly at him. “Kind of hot when you actually do what I say.”

“Alright, fuck you. Don't get used to it, babe.” Jason chuckles, shaking his head as the white streak flops onto his forehead. “When we doing this?”

“You could head out now, meet up with Crane and I’ll head back to the manor.” You suggest before taking a bite of your granola bar.

“Alright, just, uh, be careful, please. Let me know if shit happens with the Titans. I don’t want them attacking you for this shit.”

“I got it. I’ve been dealing with them the whole time. Don’t worry, Jay.” You smile softly a him as Jason gets to his feet and stands in front of you.

There's something dark in his eyes this time. He's standing over you as if he doesn't really want to leave. His brows are pinching together in the way they always do when he's worried and his jaw is squaring. He's putting all of the pressure onto his good leg, something you still notice immediately. But, he stands as if he's an unmovable force anyway and the smirk drops from his face.

“I’m serious, alright? Be careful.” Jason sucks in a breath and you've never seen him this kind of protective over you before.

“I will, promise.” You offer him a soft nod before Jason reluctantly heads out.

Jason is still hesitant, keeping his stance in front of you and it feels wrong. It always feels wrong to just leave. But, it's not his place to offer something else in place of him leaving anymore. And he also knows the second he walks back to Crane, that'll probably the last time you see each other until it's resolved. You're going to have to go to the Titans and Dick will likely be watching you closely, to make sure you don't get yourself killed or flip sides again. A lot can happen in a day or a few days and you were just almost killed. It scares the ever-living shit out of him, the very thought of losing you the way you lost him. He hates that he's leaving again. It's what he has to do and he knows that but knowing what he has to do to end this, doesn't make the decision any easier.

Jason leans down, placing his hand on your cheek before he rests his forehead against yours. Your eyes fall closed, a soft and subtle smile coming to your lips.

"Don't do anything fucking stupid and for once, listen to Dick and Gar, alright?" Jason asks, pulling just enough to see your face.

Your brows pull together. "You want me to listen to Dick?"

Jason is still mad at him and maybe Dick wants him dead still. That's always a possibility but something Jason knows, now that he's thinking with a clear head is that Dick does try to protect the Titans. They're his family and he's the leader. And Gar is one of your best friends. The two of them won't let anything happen to you if they can stop it. He knows you taking off had nothing to do with Gar and after last night, Jason thinks Gar would try to actually stop you if it happens again.

Jason's jaw squares, reluctant to say it again. "I'm serious. You got fucking shot." Jason quips.

"Okay." You agree softly, knowing if Jason is asking you to listen to anyone, you should probably take the advice. It always means Jason is very worried and serious. Two things that are a bit unsettling. "I will, promise." You smile softly before pressing your forehead to his for a second. "Now, go, okay? I'll be fine."

Jason nods his head, pulling away and dropping his hand. "I'll call when I find something out." Jason offers one last nod before he turns and darts out of the room.

Jason heads out to an old mechanic shop to meet up with Crane and for the life of him, he has no idea why he's even agreed to this. The only thing he wants to do right about now is kill Crane. He wants to fight him and shoot him and cause him horrendous pain for what he's put you through. He could have killed you and Jason swore no one would ever get away with it. But, now he has to walk in here and pretend he's not pissed about it. He's a good liar, but he doesn't know if he'll actually be able to withhold his blooming hatred.

When Jason meets with Crane, Crane seems to be acting perfectly normal, seemingly believing Jason will always be on his side no matter what. It's something Jason finds to be interesting because he already knew Crane was arrogant. But, he didn't think he was arrogant enough to think Jason would just be perfectly fine with him after being drugged, tricked, lied to, and used. He just shot Tim, possibly ruining his chances of actually going home. He could have killed you. Jason already threatened Crane but Crane seems perfectly fine with everything and Jason's wondering if that's because he agreed to meet.

"You could have fucking killed her." Jason starts with gritted teeth as they walk into the car garage.

"Yeah...sorry about that." Crane says casually. "She was in the wrong place at the wrong time. Sometimes, there are necessary casualties."

Crane is confident in his ability to manipulate Jason. Crane didn't have a single thing on the kid and Jason still spilled everything about Batman and the Titans. It was easy. It might become more difficult right now, but Crane is confident they'll overcome the current hurdle. After all, for the time being, Crane does still need Jason for his own disposal.

Jason wants to explode right here and take Crane out with him. A necessary causality? That's how you and Tim are being referred to? There is no such thing as a necessary causality when it comes to innocent people. Innocent people don't have to die. They don't have to be hurt. It was a choice Crane made in order to get you out of the way. To show Jason Crane is the one still running the show. And Jason has to stand here and pretend like this is all fine and lie. He's ready for this whole thing to be done and over with.

"You were right anyway." Jason sucks up his pride and do as you tell him. For that alone, Jason should get to kill him after this. "She was going to turn me in. It was all a setup, that's why she was even there."

Crane seems to perk up with Jason's words and he's hoping Crane believes him. "I did tell you she couldn't be trusted. That must be so hard to handle right now. But, see, now you know who has your back." Crane offers an eery smile. "Do I need to finish the job now?" Crane asks bluntly and he is definitely asking to gauge Jason's reaction. He doesn't miss the way Jason's hands turn into fists at his sides with his knuckles turning white.

"No." Jason states. "I'll do it." He states simply, releasing his hands.

"Good. Then you'll have nothing to worry about." Crane pats Jason's shoulder and Jason is ready to change the subject. He hopes that'll be enough bait for now.

"What the fuck is this?" Jason asks, switching the conversation as he looks around.

"This is where the victors go to rest their weary heads." Crane says.

"We didn't win." Jason argues. "They were gonna take me back but you fucked it all up." Sure, Crane did manage to poison the water but from where Jason is standing, it doesn't seem like too many people have been affected and with the alert going out, less people will likely drink the water. They didn't win anything.

"So you had a moment." Crane states simply, completely unbothered. "I've had plenty of them myself. Let bygones by bygones. I forgive you." Crane says before he pulls the cover off a yellow sports car. He lets out a sigh, as if to be pleased by the vehicle. "Sprezzatara."

Jason just rolls his eyes before he leans against the car, resting his back against the A frame. He's annoyed and he wants to get out of here. The hell if Crane forgiving him for? As far as Jason is concerned, he thinks getting him drugged was payback enough for him dealing the drug out behind his back. And Crane seems to be growing a little annoyed with him, too as he lets out a sigh before closing the garage door using the button hanging from a cable.

"Show some respect." Crane says sternly. "Sit." Crane depends, lightly gesturing towards a chair in front of a desk with a computer.

Jason does as told, sitting down and slouching in his seat.

"You know who Edward Bernays is?" Crane asks.

"The sauce guy?" Jason questions.

"Eggs and bacon." Crane says, taking a seat beside Jason. "Classic American breakfast. Do you know why?"

"What's this have to do with--"

"Pork farmers paid Edward Bernays to make it so. See, but Edward Bernays, he had this...this uncle, right? Dear old Uncle Sigmund. As in Sigmund Freud. See, and Freud taught Edward Bernays how the human mind worked. And Edward, he worked the human mind. He didn't sell the proletariat bacon. He sold them the idea that a hearty breakfast was what every doctor thought was best for them. After that, the bacon, it sold itself. Edward Bernays understood that an idea is the most powerful weapon we have." Crane explains before he swivels in his chair to face the computer, Jason eying him carefully and he's getting a really bad feeling about all of this. "It's not the product, it's how you sell it." Crane says as he brings up footage of Nightwing fighting some bad guys and Crane is in some type of editing software. "And Gotham is in need of a new product. We now interrupt your regularly scheduled program to bring you a message for the good people of Gotham.

Jason leans forward as the video starts to play, Crane already having sent it out as alert to every person in Gotham City.

Oh no.

prev. chapter | next chapter

series masterlist | masterlist | tag list

Tag list: @fairyofshampoo // @italiana-20 // @jasontoddsmentaldisorders // @purplerose291 // @lovelessamai  // @makaelaseresin // @lenidaslenchen // @mayfieldss  // @ghostkingblake // @im-done-with-this-im-out // @velvetskies // @lilylovelyxo // @cryinghotmess // @yesimwriting // @vivian-555 // @stainedstardom // @baebeepeach // @legend-o-zelda // @harleycao // @somehow-lovable-trash  // @xx-all-purpose-nerd-xx // @deyja-the-duck // @jasontoddslover //  @captainmarvels-blog // @totallynotkaibiased // @scarlovesyou // @whydoyoucare866 // @littlemeowmeow1000 // @ginger24880 // @septixtrash // @kplatzman // @urmomsgayforme5 // @killxz // @lovefks

[axailslink]

Hi, can I please request a shuri fic, smut please, where the reader and shuri been in a committed relationship for a long time and have a very active sex life but reader recently had surgery fibroids removed and she’s recovered but has been super conscious of her new scar from her surgery on her lower abdomen, so she avoids being naked around shuri and refuse to be intimate. Shuri finally caught on to what’s going and shows reader she loves her body and her new permanent scar.

Our Scars

Shuri Udaku x poc FEM reader

Warning: I guess you could say smut but it ain't nothing but Shuri eating the reader out however the words I use are the warning I use words such as pussy and cunt there is also some spitting of the reader's juices into her mouth... If this ain't for you scroll homie. Vulgar choice of words and orgasm denial but overall this is a comfort fic.

Summary: Your new scar did more than hurt you it made you aware of every insecurity you had so you did everything in your power to avoid seeing it Shuri, of course, notices this and puts a quick stop to it.

A/n: once again I don't write smut (I've typed that on my request guidelines) unless it's of my own accord I don't believe that I can live up to what you want but I mean since you asked nicely, of course, I will try.

The first week after you healed

Shuri kisses down the middle of your chest raising your legs up as she reaches your lower tummy but you stop her pulling her up to you and placing a kiss on her lips she smiles and kisses you back before traveling back down but you stop her again this time sitting up. "Baby, you okay?" She sits up to look at you in the eye "yeah I'm just not really feeling this whole..." You cover yourself with the cover and she nods "that's fine let's watch a movie" She sits back against the headboard as she pulls you to her but you shake your head "no I think I'm going to go shower" you break from her grip and walk to the bathroom Shuri scrunches her face up in confusion and disgust at your current attitude.

The second week

Shuri sits up in bed and looks at you as you're pulling on a sweater over your tiny tank she blinks "it's 80 degrees outside are you going to actually wear a sweater?" You shrug as you walk away from the mirror and over to her Shuri grabs you by your waist and presses a soft kiss against the bit of your revealed tummy below the sweater causing you to push her away.

The third week

Shuri walks to the bathroom and gently rattles the doors "baby why are we locking doors? You okay?" You open the door with a towel wrapped around you tightly she raises a brow "baby you've been acting weird what's wrong? Don't ignore me..." You walk past her and sit on the bed as you oil your body down "nothing" Shuri sucks her teeth and nods "Y/n I can tell when something is wrong with you and you're choosing to lie to me as if I can't see it."

Shuri looks at the towel and the way it's tight against your skin "you need to loosen this towel it's gone cut your ci-" she gently loosens it but you grab her hands keeping a tight grip on the towel it finally hits her in this moment what's bothering you and has been for the past three weeks. "Y/n you do know that scar doesn't change a thing about you right?" she loosens your hands and lets the towel pool around your waist revealing your naked body can only look away shake your head her words mean nothing at this moment. The scar changed everything at least in your eyes it did when it wasn't healed it was easy to tell yourself that it would go away and that it didn't mean anything but now that it's healed it's a part of you forever you can't get rid of it...you feel Shuri's cold hands cupping your face turning your attention towards her "do you think my scars make me look bad?" you look at the scars on her arms and shake your head "of course not" she nods "that's exactly what I think about yours uthando (love.) Scars are not signs of ugliness or weakness they never have been our scars show how strong, fine, and confident we are. There are tribes here where we live who permanently scar themselves on purpose to show strength baby this little scar-" Shuri points to the scar on your lower tummy "-it shows me nothing but amandla (strength) and if I have to kiss it every time you undress to remind you I will."

Shuri ducks down and kisses the scar as she gently spreads your legs "I love this scar okay? We love this scar" "we love this scar?" she nods as she kisses your inner thigh "The more you say it the more you'll believe it" Shuri gently pushes you back on the bed hiking your legs up "I can't hear you love" Shuri pulls you to her by your legs gently "I love this s- babe this is childish as f-" Shuri's thumb gently rubs up and down your slit causing you to close your eyes and let out quickened gasps. "It's not childish if it has to do with your love for yourself yitsho (say it)" Shuri leans down and you feel her breath fan against your pussy. She moves both of her hands to your thighs now keeping them still as she gently sucks on your clit first teasing it with her tongue but she's not satisfied by the moans she's still not hearing what she wants to hear. Shuri slaps your thigh so hard it's sure to bruise but it does its job and catches your attention forcing you to whimper out a reply. "I'm not going to say that it's childish" Shuri is quick to respond "ufuna ndiyeke?" (you want me to stop?) Shuri gets up and shrugs "then you can finish yourself off" you look at her shock written all over your face. "you're really going to deny me an orgasm?" She nods "yes."

One thing about Shuri that will never change is that her word is true and she takes it very seriously if she were to stop now she would no longer engage in anything sexual with you...well she wouldn't let you climax in any of those activities. She's done this on multiple occasions but not tonight you're just not in the mood to play her little orgasm denial game.

"I love my scar" Shuri smiles at your words and picks you up "there we go come on say it again mean it this time" you speak up louder this time "I love my scars." Shuri sits on the bed "it makes me happy to hear that but now that I've heard that I want to hear something else..." you look her up and down a smile it's quick to find its way to your face "and what do you want to hear?" she smiles as she sits back "your moans as you sit on your throne ikumkani wam (my queen)" she smiles as you slowly climb your way up to her face hands settled on the headboard Shuri of course notices you about to hesitate but doesn't give you that chance she's quick as she lets her arms wrap around your thighs and keep you in place "where are you going?" Shuri forces you to lower yourself on her face "suffocate me I'll be fine you know CPR I taught you" well...she does have her priorities set.

Knowing that Shuri isn't worried about breathing you don't care either as you slowly start to grind against her tongue you let yourself close your eyes and focus on chasing your own orgasm. Shuri sucks on your clit causing your legs to buckle for a moment but she holds you up as she continues sucking and flicking on it. Eventually, you become too sensitive to move on your own your legs are shaking but Shuri doesn't waver in fact she smiles against your wet cunt enjoying the way you taste and how your body reacts when you're close to your climax. Your moans and shaking legs are her motivation. Your legs start to close on Shuri and she lets them as you finally reach your climax you ride it out as Shuri laps at your folds drinking you all in but she doesn't swallow she pulls you down to her face and presses a firm kiss to your lips one that you immediately open up to. She lets the taste of her spit and your cum make the kiss sloppy, wet and nasty when you pull away she's smiling "say it one more time" you're so out of it you have no idea what she's talking about at the moment "the scar..." She reminds you and you laugh and shake your head "I love my scars." Shuri gently rubs the scar but her eyes never leave yours as she smiles "good because I love them too."

you want to stay serious but her face is all wet and it's hilarious to you, you wipe her face with the palm of your hand and smile "you got a little something... Everywhere." She nods "then help me get it off," her sly smirk tells you that once she's clean it's her turn.

A/n: Once again I do not write smut but for you baby, I tried. yall need to stop asking me to do this shit yall know I don't know how to do this so don't judge me now.

[jenniferjareauwife]

Surprise

pairing: jennifer jareau x cowgirl fem reader

category: fluff, hurt/comfort

warnings: none

word count: 865

summary: 4th part to its a datemoving in with jj has caused you to get a little homesick but she's there to help

I had decided to move to DC with JJ. It was the best for both of us. She couldn't give up her job and my mental health would be better in DC, where I was more accepted. I had only lived here for about a month and it was going great, I got to see the love of my life everyday and get unlimited kisses and cuddles. The sex was even better too. It was also more inclusive. There weren't as many slurs or discrimination up here than there was in Texas.

Even though it was so much better than my hometown I still missed my old home. I loved waking up to the sun rising, not cars honking in the streets. And I liked seeing my animals everyday. I couldn't do that here. It was amazing waking up next to JJ everyday but there were somethings Texas had that DC lacked. "Baby?" My girlfriend poked my cheek as she saw me lost in thought. "You ok? You look like you're thinking a bit too hard there."

"Yeah I'm good."

"You sure?"

"Mhm."

"I'm gonna head to the coffee place down the street. You want anything?"

"Bagel sandwich please." She smiled before leaning down to press a kiss on the top of my head.

"You got it."

She came back 20 minutes later, giving me my bagel sandwich. I didn't eat it though. I wasn't in the mood. "Honey?" I asked quietly.

"Mhm?"

"Can we cuddle?"

"I think I can do you one better." She grabbed her car keys again. "Let's go."

"Go where?"

"It's a surprise. Come on." She put her hand on my lower back and led me out the apartment door.

"Jayje I want to stay home." She smiled, loving how I already called it home. It did feel like home. Since the first time I visited her and woke up in her bed, saw her get ready for work in the morning. It was home.

"You'll like this place better. I promise." I frowned but I trusted her.

The car ride wasn't super long, just 20 minutes. We were driving out of DC and surprisingly, there was a lot of country. This looked more like home. "Where are we going?" I asked again.

"It's a surprise baby." She rested her hand on my upper thigh, playing with the frays of my jean shorts. I put my hand over hers and squeezed it. "I want you to be happy here."

"I am happy here. I wouldn't have decided to move here if I didn't want to JJ."

"I know. I'm just saying...it's natural to feel homesick, and it's ok if you're homesick. I just want you to come to me about it instead of acting like everything's ok."

"I'm sorry." I whispered. "I just thought you might get offended."

"We've been together seven months. I wouldn't be offended if you were homesick." She laughed and the car stopped. I looked straight ahead. We were at a farm.

"There are farms in DC?"

"This isn't DC silly." She laughed. "I didn't know you were this clueless about DC geography, Texas." I blushed at the nickname.

"Well I've only lived here for a month and I've only traveled a few blocks from the apartment. Don't judge me."

"Whatever." She rolled her eyes and squeezed my thigh. I got out of the car, my eyes widening when I saw horses.

"Can I go?"

"Yeah baby. You can do whatever you want." She laughed as I ran up to one of the horses, petting its head before hugging its neck. JJ stayed a few steps back, watching with a huge smile on her face.

"Honey come here!"

"No...I'm good."

"Please?" I gave her my best puppy eyes and she couldn't help but give in. She came up behind me and gave me a hug. "Give the horse a hug."

"Baby I'm not comfortable with that."

"But they're so comforting. Look how calm he is! Please. Just a little hug."

"Ok. Fine. Only because I love you." She have my bare shoulder a kiss before moving around to his other side, hugging him loosely."

"Isn't it comforting?" I rested my head against his neck.

"Yeah." She admitted. "I like your hugs better though." I giggled.

"Yeah. My hugs are pretty great." I looked all around, seeing how much land was around. It reminded me of my ranch back in Texas."

"You ok?" JJ asked quietly, walking back over to me and giving me another hug.

"Mhm." She kissed my cheek and my jaw. "It reminds me of Texas. I miss it." I turned my head to peck her lips.

"I know you miss it my love and it's ok to miss it." She rubbed my back.

"We should go home...before I get too attached to this cutie." JJ laughed.

"You mean me, right?"

"No."

"You didn't even hesitate." She backed away.

"Sorry."

"You're definitely not sorry." I laughed and jogged over to her, kissing her gently on the lips.

"Let's go home." I whispered, wrapping my arms around her waist.

"I love you." She pressed a kiss to my forehead, rubbing my back.

"I love you too."

[twds-things]

Jealous Girl pt.2| Carl Grimes

Carl Grimes x fem!reader

𝘀𝘂𝗺𝗺𝗮𝗿𝘆: after your little "argument" with Enid, you're hanging out with Carl and realise you can't keep your feelings from him.

𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗱𝘀: 1,243

𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀: none, just fluff.

a few hours after your scavenging trip with Enid, you're sitting on a bench, reading a book like earlier today. it's your way to relax, just forget about all the bad things and the horrible world. as you're lost in the plot and your own thought, someone suddenly comes up to you.

"hey, y/n." you hear a familiar voice. you look up from your book and see your favourite one-eyed, brown haired boy with a cowboy's hat standing infront of you with a smile. a smile that always made your heart melt. you don't know how, but when the sun is setting and the golden rays of sun are falling on his freckled face, he looks even more adorable, if it's even possible.

"hi, Carl. how are you?" you ask as you return the smile. Carl suddenly seems to get a bit shy, staring into the ground as he smiles.

"nothing much... i heard about your little scavenging run with Enid." he says as he looks into your eyes. your heart sinks a bit, did she tell him about your feelings? or maybe she told him about her feelings, which is even worse? you can't panic now.

"yeah, Michonne asked me to go. but i guess Enid doesn't seem to like me very much anyway, haha..." you say, trying to hide the anxious feeling in your stomach that grew each passing second you thought about what Carl could know. he just chuckles slightly, the sound making your heart speed up, and looks at you with a small smirk.

"well, she doesn't have to like you. do you care if she does?" you shake your head no. "exactly. anyway, i actually wanted to ask if you want to go to my house? we can read some comics or play video games?" he asks as he looks at you. it's just a normal request, that's what friends do, but somehow it made you feel even more nervous, but in a good way. you smile at him and nod your head

"of course! we can read some comics" you say and his smile grows.

"perfect. let's go, then." he says. you get up, grabbing your book and following him to his house.

once you get into his house, you're greeted by Rick with sleeping Judith in his arms. you smile politely, also greeting him and you pet Judith's little head, before quickly going with Carl to his room.

you've been there before, a lot of times, but it never failed to amaze you how messy he was. clothes all over the floor (mostly flannels), comics either stacked up on a few shelves or layed out all over the desk along with a few video games. his bed messy, sheets kicked up to one side as he never really cares to make his bed in the morning. yet somehow, the room brought you comfort. maybe because, despite how messy it was, it's very cozy and warm, or maybe just because it's Carl's.

you sit on his bed, leaning against the wall as he rummages through his pretty latge collection of comics.

"so, what comics do you wanna read? i have a lot" he asks with a wide grin. you shrug your shoulders, looking at the comic shelves.

"hmm.. how about spiderman and black cat?" he asks. of course he wants to read the issue with black cat. you roll your eyes playfuly and nod.

"sure thing." you say and you watch as he grabs the particular comic from his shelve. he then walks up to you, flopping onto the bed next to you. he leans against the wall and smiles, opening the comic.

"do you like black cat?" he asks and you smile a little.

"i do, but not as much as you.." you tease and he chuckles

"well, i'm not denying that. she's super cool." he says. you smirk and nudge his shoulder which makes him chuckle again and smile widely.

"open the comic, i wanna read" you say, a wide smile on your face just like on his. he opens the comic and you two begin reading.

you keep reading in comfortable silence, not realising how close you two actually are, so close your shoulders slighly touch. you look at him and he's so into the comic he doesn't even realises you're staring, which is kinda adorable. you smile as you admire him, looking at his beautiful features. his soft, long hair you always adored, his ocean eye that you think is the most beautiful eye you have ever seen, his small, adorable nose, and his lips.. his soft looking lips. you really want to kiss those lips. you're getting so lost in your thoughts as you admire him, that you don't even realise when he turns his head to you. now you make eye contact with him and your heart skips a beat. he smiles. oh god, he noticed you were staring at him. you blush and look away quickly, burning from embarassment.

"y/n?" you hear him calling out your name softly as he tilts his head "are you okay?"

you look at him, your cheeks now all kinds of red and your heart beating out of your chest.

"h-huh? uhm.. yeah, fine.. why?" you ask nervously.

"well, you were staring at me" he says with a grin

"uhm.. no i wasn't.. i just.. uhm.. zoned out" you stammer a bit, a small blush already creeping on your cheeks as Carl stares at you with his blue eye

"you know, you don't have to hide anything from me, right?" *Carl says in a soft and comforting tone and he puts his hand on top of yours. your heart skips a beat and you look at him, your eyes shining, and he smiles at you. you nod a little and take a deep breath.

"i just...really...like you, Carl." you say quietly, looking down at his hand on top of yours. he leans his face a bit closer to yours and your cheeks heat up again

"i like you too, y/n" he says in a soft tone and puts his hand on your chin to lift your head up a bit. it almost takes your breath away and your cheeks are now beet red, your heart pumping so fast it could beat out of your chest. you glance at his lips, and he glances at yours. he slowly leans in, his hand still on your chin. you also lean closer, giving him a sign you want it too.

"you're so beautiful" he whispers as he brushes some hair out of your face, and then, he leans even closer, connecting your lips in a gentle, soft and loving kiss. both of you close your eyes, enjoying this moment. the softness of his lips, the gentle touch of his hand, his breath on your lips, his nose bumping slightly over yours, it all feels like a dream. but it's real. you're kissing carl grimes.

after a small moment, you both pull back, breathing a bit shallow and cheeks red. you two smile at eachother and you look away, shying a bit. he just chuckles slightly and turns your head gently to his

"i wanted this for so long, y/n." he confesses and you feel the butterflies in your stomach getting even stronger.

"me too." you whisper and he smiles again, leaning in to kiss your forehead gently.

after that, you two just look at eachother for a small while, savouring the beautiful moment you both waited for..

soo this the part 2 i hope it's okay because tbh i don't think it's that good💀 again, english is not my first language so i apologise for any mistakes. anyway i hope y'all liked it and if i have time and come up with some ideas, i'll write more! btw i don't know why but i can't comment on my own blogs so i can't respond to your comments and i don't know why so i'm sorry

[babiestbubbles]

Hey there! Do you have 2k12 TMNT agre head-canons?

If not that’s totally okay! Just wanted to ask :D

Shell yeah I do!

(I'm using they/them for Leo bc I love the She/Her Leo Agenda but I know it's not some people's thing and that's okay! :D)

Leo

Absolutely needs it. Their regression is such a fundamental coping mechanism for them. It's the only aspect of their life where they can drop all responsibility and be entirely carefree and happy, so it's an intense duality of something they really love and something they really need.

Before they were out to their brothers as a regressor it wasn't nearly as helpful because they always had to stay half-big in the event that they were needed but now that they have trusted caregivers in their life, they love their regression. They're still a bit embarrassed about how tiny they get, but that's really the worst of it.

Their age range is baby to small toddler at best, just the most itty bitty baby ever. When their brothers took care of them for the first time and realized just how tiny they are, all of their hearts were broken thinking about how long Leo had been regressing this little with no one around to take care of them.

Deserves to be spoiled but isn't, at least not at first. They allow themself almost 0 regression gear. They used to cry and cry when they were little and alone so they bought a pacifier and teether, just too soothe themself.

Again, their brothers were totally heartbroken to find this out. Raph wanted to get up right there and then and ask April to bring stuff over, or heck even steal some stuff for Little Leo. But his brothers convinced him to calm down for a second and on their next night off they went and got Leo some basic stuff. They wanted to get more but Leo shut it down. Of course in retaliation they get baby Leo something new at LEAST once every two weeks. They adore it, their face lights up every time. Big Leo is a bit embarrassed but every one of their brothers is quick to come to the defense of their beloved baby.

Raph

An absolute GOD at caregiving. No one expects it, but he's a total sweetheart. Always up for playing games, making snacks, or movie night cuddles. Anything a little wants to do, he's more than happy to oblige to.

(I don't have a set brother I think he'd care for. I think they'd all pretty much love him and a caregiver, and I think he would absolutely love caregiving so I'm just going say 'His Little' and you can imagine as you please)

Would beat someone up in an instant for hurting his little, physically or emotionally. BUT is also super good at comforting. He'll just hold them or rock them while whispering reassurances. Never shushing them or telling them not to cry, instead telling them it's okay, he's here, he's got them.

Spoils his littles so much, and is just generally so good with kids. He he's so soft for them, and even when he has to enforce a rule he's always gentle. Such a motherly presence and absolutely does NOT mind taking on that role if that's what his little needs. He's totally down to be called Mama/Mommy or any other feminine names if his baby prefers.

(I don't have a ton of regressor Raph stuff off the top of my head, but feel free to request more and I'd be happy to oblige)

Mostly I think he'd be in the Rambunctious kiddo to Moody/Rebellious Teenager range. Just kind of a "I do what I want, when I want" kind of attitude. Sometimes this ends up influencing Mikey to act similarly, despite him usually being in younger headspace than Raph. It totally depends on the day and his mood but he and Mikey are either Ride-or-Die attached at the hip partners in crime, or they're mortal enemies fighting all the time. Raph is either super down to do stuff with Mikey, or wants absolutely nothing to do with him.

The only time Raph's headspace shifts out of this range is when April is around. (If you're a trans-fem Leo truther, you can add her to this list too. Personally, I do!) Something about her feminine nature just absolutely crushes Raph's rebellious spirit and he becomes the sweetest little baby. He always regresses SUPER small around her and is the most well behaved little boy. He's soft and shy and ADORABLE. Still a bit bigger than Little Leo, he has some autonomy, but way tinier than normal. April is, of course, honored to have such an effect on him and starts swinging by more often when she finds out.

He's also a biting MENACE. They buy him tons of teeters and chew toys and stuff, he just loves sticking anything and everything he can in his mouth, and when he's feeling bigger and rebellious he loves to chomp.

Tends to get really worked up over things (not always anger, sometimes he gets really sad about how Splinter/his brothers treat him) and withdraw or even have panic/anxiety attacks (if it's bad enough even meltdowns or shutdowns bc of his canon ADHD) When this happens his brothers will try to get him to regress either to talk to him/help him process his emotions or honestly just to soothe him and make him feel better. During meltdowns they try to make sure he doesn't hurt himself and have even made a couple communication cards for shutdowns. His brothers are the only ones he lets see him like this. (And sometimes April) Casey, Splinter, and the rest of the world are off limits.

Donnie

Definitely refused to even try regression for a while, out of pure embarrassment. He doesn't like the vulnerability and he doesn't trust his room, he couldn't get himself to regress. He didn't feel safe, didn't trust it. He wasn't even sure what they treated his feelings for April (he's thankfully over that now)

He doesn't refuse to caregive, but he's kind of terrible at it. He can't soothe to save his life, he's awful at discipline, and he doesn't know how to play games right. He can barely even hold a conversation with his regressed brothers at first. Which is a shame because, as much as the 4 may fight, his regressed brothers almost always wanted to talk to him. For months he watched his other brothers regress or caregive, but refused to participate. He couldn't deny that part of him was curious, maybe even a little jealous, but he was too stubborn on the subject to give it a chance. Eventually, the longing got to him, and he tried to regress alone in his room, like Leo used to. But even in the comfort and solitude of his room, he couldn't get himself to regress. He didn't feel safe, didn't trust it. He wasn't even sure what the problem was. So, he turned to his trusty confidant. The one and only Casey Jones. (Once the two had both been blatantly turned down by April, who explained that not only was she not interested, but also questioning her sexuality entirely, they found themselves falling back into their familiar friendship.)

And Casey, who'd found out about regression when Leo started regressing openly, but hadn't really been involved in anyway, IMMEDIATELY offered to be Donnie's caregiver. He insisted Don give it another shot, but with someone there to supervise him. It would care of the fear of being found and also help Donnie feel safer and cared for, a perfect recipe for regression. Donnie reluctantly agreed and was shocked to find… it worked! The two has regression in secret for a while, before Casey convinced Donnie to tell his brothers. They were, of course, super supportive but Casey remains Donnie's main caregiver and the others sometimes babysit/have playdates.

Donnie's around kiddo-toddler age, and a very hands on little. He likes toys and blocks. He absolutely LOVES building things, but he's not too big of a fan of idle things, like coloring or cartoons. Though sometimes the bright shiny ones, or the ones with soft soothing tones/words will trap him in.

Casey sometimes brings him 3D puzzles/little building kits for Don to put together. He always makes sure they're age appropriate to Donnie doesn't have a fit about not being able to do it, thought sometimes he needs help and Casey gets hit with the cutest set of puppy dog eyes an a "Hep, pease?"

Casey also happens to be a Master Snack Maker, which Donnie is quite happy about.

Mikey

Absolutely 0 age range, homie could be 3, 13, or anywhere in between at any given time. Has a preference for Raph taking care of him, but it's super slight and he loves Leo time as well. His favorite is when they're both there to take care of him, but it always makes him SUPER little.

Likes to put things in his mouth a lot like Raph, but it's not as big of a problem since he spends a lot of time in bigger headspaces too.

Easiest of the 4 to get to regress. The tiniest little kiddo-themed thing and he's practically down for the count. Literally the world's easiest bonk.

LOVES games, any time of game or activity that involves a caregiver will always be his favorite, he hates feeling alone when in headspace. (It makes him feel abandoned)

Begs his brothers (ESPECIALLY LEO) to take him Topside at night to play on playgrounds. (Mikey likes the wooden one in Central Park, but they usually go to Washington Square park so Raph and/or Donnie can skate in the empty fountain bowl) [Raph tends to be weaker to Mikey's pleads, but as Leader, Leo makes decisions about visiting topside so Mikey cuts out the middleman]

A SUCKER for snacks. Sometimes if he's hyper fixating on something really hard and forgets to eat for hours, someone will tease him into regressing just so they can get him to stop and eat something.