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#so much so that you can’t help but stare or linger but your heart hurts to the point where you can’t think about anything else….
pupkashi · 1 day
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satoru comeback truthers rise WHERE IS UR RAGE !!!
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youre still slightly shaking, even with one hand in your lovers warmer one, you can’t help but feel the same fear you felt when you saw him laying in two.
“sweetheart” his voice is honey like, smoothing your sore throat as you look up at him, face dirty and scarred. “i asked if you wanna get pho?”
it’s odd, coming back home as if nothing happened. as if he hadn’t just had the battle of a lifetime and almost lost. your legs feel wobbly and that sinking pit in your stomach is back. you bite your bottom lip to stop it from trembling, playing it off as you thinking.
“yeah pho sounds good” you say weakly, not taking your eyes off of satoru as he leads you to the couch. he tries to untangle your fingers from his, stopping when he feels your squeeze harder to keep his hand in place.
he doesn’t say anything, instead ordering with one hand, drawing a soothing circle with his thumb on your hand. satoru can feel your eyes on him, practically burning a hole into his skull with the intensity of your stare. he doesn’t mind, he can’t imagine how you felt, thinking he was dead for who knows how long. god knows what he would’ve done if the roles were reversed.
“ordered it, should be here in an hour ish” he whispers, pulling you close and laying back on the couch. you’re quick to wrap your arms around him, careful to not squeeze too hard as he was still sore and bruised.
thump, thump, thump.
the rhythmic beating is enough to calm you for a moment, your hands are less shaky and you feel like you can finally breathe. your eyes shut for a second, only to be met with the scene of satoru laying on ground. your eyes are shooting open immediately, making you sit up straight and giving satoru a once over, relieved to see he was really there.
“hey, im right here” he’s as gentle as ever, hands finding yours and squeezing tight. “im not going anywhere” he’s promises, placing one of your hands over his warm chest, the rhythmic beating of his heart calms you once more.
“‘m sorry” you choke out, wiping your eyes quickly before smiling softly, “was just- it was a lot” you mumble, “i thought-” you can’t bring yourself to finish the sentence, satoru doesn’t make you, pulling you to his chest and kissing the top of your head.
the two of you stay like that for a while, taking turns holding each other, comforting one another and placing endless kisses on each others faces. it felt like only a moment had passed in comparison to the eternity you felt without satoru.
satoru notices the way your eyes linger on him, the way you’re looking at him every couple minutes as the two of you eat soup in silence. it hurts his heart, seeing you so afraid and traumatized, he wishes he could go back in time and make sure they kept you away from any screens.
the season finale of the show you two had been watching doesn’t matter to you much anymore, barely paying attention to it. your focus is instead on the white haired man laying practically on top of you, mindlessly eating some popcorn you’d made for him.
your fingers are tangled in his hair, somehow still soft despite everything he went through. satoru can feel your eyes on him, of course he can. he wonders if you’re looking at his scarred skin, if you’re too scared to even continue a relationship with him.
“you should shower” your comment is what breaks the silence and interrupts satoru’s spiraling thoughts.
“huh?” there’s genuine confusion in his voice. is that really what you were thinking about? “are you calling me stinky?” he teases, testing the waters.
“grimy, actually” a small smile creeping on your lips. it makes satoru’s heart glow, a wide grin on his lips as he sees your smile.
“your words cut deep” he pouts, quickly smiling again when you roll your eyes at his familiar antics. “even sukuna didn’t hurt me this much” the words make you gasp, smacking him slightly and pushing him off the couch.
“uncalled for!” you laugh, shrieking when satoru stands from the floor and picks you up swiftly. he doesn’t think k twice before peppering kisses over your face and nuzzling his face in the crook of your neck.
“now you’re stinky too!” he wastes no time in heading to the restroom, with you still in his arms (hardly putting up a fight). he sets you on the counter softly, bending down to be eye level with you. his nose is only centimeters from yours, and you can’t resist the urge to rub yours against his.
satoru giggles at your action; the noise alone puts your heart at ease, the weight on your shoulders lifted and things felt right.
for the time the two of you are in the restroom life is perfect again. even when satoru takes his shirt off, visibly nervous about the new scar across his torso, you’re too happy to have him there to care.
“you don’t think it looks, i don’t know, ugly?” he’s avoiding eye contact and you can’t help but laugh softly. the sound makes his head snap towards you immediately, relaxing when you take his hands in his and pull him closer.
“you could never look ugly, angel boy” you mumble, kissing his lips. “i think it looks good, actually” you grin, wiggling your eyebrows and making his cheeks flush pink. satoru wastes no time kissing you again, giggling against your lips.
the hot water hits his skin and it feels like a godsend, making hums sigh in relief.
“told you you should shower” you tease, making your lover grin at your words. he waves you off gently, relishing in the feeling. “c’mere let me shampoo you.”
satoru doesn’t hesitate, a faint smile on his lips when your fingers scratch his scalp. maybe it’s the steam enshrouding the two of you, or seeing you change into his clothes, or smelling the clean bedsheets again, or being home- regardless of the reason satoru finally feels free.
there’s no stress on his shoulders from the higher ups or his clan, he’s not afraid of his students getting hurt anymore, he’s not afraid of losing you.
“i love you sweetheart” he whispers. you’ve been asleep for a while now, your head on his chest with your arms wrapped tightly around him. maybe it was weird but he didn’t care, he spent the night tracing your features with his eyes, memorizing any noise you made and the way you breathed.
satoru’s eyes watered, grateful to be back home. his eyes wandering to his sock drawer, tomorrow he’ll pull out the small velvet box he bought a year ago.
taglist: @chilichopsticks @anime-for-the-sleepless @safaia-47 @nanamikentoseyebags @fushironi @nineooooo @the-mom-friend-dot-com @gojoshooter @beautiful-is-boring @sweetheart-satoru @luna0713hunter @torusmochi @kentocalls @sadmonke
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rosaacicularis · 2 years
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someone remind me to write more secret relationship scarian
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helluvapoison · 7 months
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Feelings
imagine being another fallen angel and experiencing lust for the first time
Lucifer Morningstar x Reader
18+ only, minors DNI
warning: nsfw but no smut, slight but unintentional corruption kink,
ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ
Unlike the other emotions, this one crept up on you slowly. It lied in wait most of the time, only revealing itself around Lucifer. Truthfully the feeling came so infrequently that you didn’t think to worry about it, forgot about it even. Then his hand would linger on your waist or he missed your cheek, placing a kiss on your neck and a tiny flame ignited deep inside you. You accepted his stammered apologies but the feeling did not.
The warmth itself was uncomfortable solely for the reason of being new, it never hurt! Not like this.
“I think I’m hurting again.”
The calmness of your voice shouldn’t have alarmed him but Lucifer jumped to action before you finished talking, worried eyes scanning you over as they always did. Without hesitation, he took your hand when you were close enough and sat next to you on the couch. Little did he know his touch on your knee scorched you.
“Where is it this time, darling?”
“Here,” You unabashedly gestured over your stomach.
Lucifer’s voice pitcher higher, cooing,“Hungry? I can have Alfredo whip you up—“
“We don’t need to bother Alfonzo. I’m not hungry.”
His brows pinched together in confusion.
“But you said..?”
“Here.”
You enveloped his wrist and guided it up your thigh. About an inch away, where the warmth bloomed stronger with his touch, as if drawing him near, Lucifer snatched his hand away. His pupils shrunk to slits, wings audibly popping out as he jumped. His fingers that had almost grazed you had stretched and closed taught, remaining a fist.
“Oh! Oh! Oh shit.”
His reaction pulled a downright pitiful expression from you. Lucifer drew in a deep breath, calming himself and folding his feathers away. Awkwardly, a different kind than what you were used to regarding him, he sat back down. You couldn’t not notice how far he sat from you, how he folded his hands in his lap and refused to make eye contact. Hell hadn’t made a liar of you yet; you were hurt by this.
“I-I don’t think I can help you with this one, sweetheart,” Lucifer swallowed thickly, curling a finger into his collar and tugging on it, “I-I-I don’t even think I gave Charlie ‘the talk’! That wouldn’t be…”
You tried to be patient, stars did you try, but while he took his time you were being burnt alive from the inside out! You knew you needed something from him and he was unfailingly the answer. Lucifer had never denied you before, outright or not.
“You said you felt everything down here,” You pointed out.
Leaning in on your hands, you tilted your head and searched for what he refused to share. His face blushed brighter and harder than before. Embarrassment wasn’t right. It almost looked as if he was praying for an escape.
“You’re ashamed?”
Lucifer blew a raspberry, crimson slits darting all around, deliberately avoiding where you sat, “No! Nope, no shame over here!”
If not him… then perhaps it was you? Could you drive the King of Hell to shame? Surely not, how arrogant of you to even dream of it. Yet the question rolled off your tongue before you could stop it.
“Have I done som—“
With a jolt he sits up rigid and serious, desperately trying to keep what little distance remained. You were a breath away, staring into his eyes with such adoration it made your problem that much harder to ignore.
“You haven’t done anything wrong. This—This is just… I can’t be the one to help you with this.”
It wasn’t that he didn’t want to help.
He did. Desperately so. Disgustingly so.
He could sink his claws and teeth into you right fucking now and make you feel better— better than better! It was heart stopping, the idea that he could be the one to show you what pleasure is like actually made him breathless. Fuck, how he wanted to see how your face when he brought you to your peak. Your moans would be a symphony to behold, his name on your lips would be his new favorite song. The thought of being your first and only clouded his mind with desire.
He would claim you truly if you’d have him. And the look in your eyes told him you would.
But would it be right? Lucifer’s had plenty of experience, he’s not worried about disappointing you— however you regretting him afterwards? It might kill him.
“But I want you to,” The sincerity in your voice sent his heart racing, “It only happens around you—“
“You—“ Lucifer chuckled nervously, shaking his head, “You don’t know what you’re saying.”
Briefly, you shot him a warning glare before softening your expression. You cautiously grabbed his hips, slowly so he could deny you if he really wanted. (Never again.)
“I know what I’m feeling. I know you’re responsible.”You counter slyly, maneuvering him into your lap, “I know I don’t want it to go away.”
Lucifer swallowed hard on nothing, staring obviously at your lips as you spoke with lidded eyes.
“I thoug-thought you said it hurt.” He choked.
“I’m starting to understand why. I need you—“ His breath hitched when you ground up against him, holding him firmly in place to feel his hard on, “—to do something about it.”
Clutching your shirt like his life depends on it, he whines. You’re putting his restraint to the test.
And he’s about to fail.
“Please? You’re always so good at making me feel better when I’m hurting, Luci.”
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prythianpages · 7 months
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When I Kissed the Teacher | Azriel
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Summary: After crushing on Azriel for almost a year, Nesta dares you to kiss him during Valkyrie training.
Warning: reader thirsting for Az and fluff for my batboy ♥
A/N: @daycourtofficial suggested this song and idea! Though I did a poll and Az won, I couldn't help myself and also write a version for Cas (you can read it here) as a huge thank you for following and reading my stuff. I just reached 1K followers ♥
This is part of my ABBA x ACOTAR series (masterlist) where I dedicate a song to a character (:
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The first moment you saw Azriel, you were instantly drawn to him. 
His sun kissed skin radiated warmth. The hazel depths of his eyes hinted at wisdom earned through ages. His dark hair, a cascade of silken strands, framed a face sculpted to perfection. The Illyrian leathers he wore were a gift from the gods themselves as they only highlighted the well-defined muscles that lay beneath…
And his wings? Gods, those wings of his. They were massive yet delicate and iridescent. The way they always unfurled with such grace had your own wings fluttering in response.
But it wasn’t just the arresting beauty that surpassed all males you’ve encountered that drew you in. It was the impeccable way he carried himself. The mastery he exuded in combat, the patience he had while training you because if you’re going to be honest, you’re sure you pushed him past his limits. Yet, no matter how tough he was on you during training, Azriel was always kind to you outside of training grounds.
It didn’t take you long to fall for him and it didn’t matter how much you unleashed your inner turmoil onto the punching bag. Nothing could shake the strange fluttering sensation in your stomach every time your mind drifted to him. It’s like there were a million butterflies fluttering in your stomach.
Sweat glistens on your forehead and your eyebrows furrow in concentration, too lost in your thoughts to pay mind to the silent spectator that had arrived minutes ago…until he finally steps out from the shadows and speaks.
“I’d hate to be the one on your mind right now.”
A misplaced punch lands awkwardly, causing a sharp pain to shoot through your hand. “Azriel,” you breathe, your cheeks flushing as you cradle your hand close to your chest. If only he knew…
“Fuck,” Azriel curses, hazel eyes flashing with concern. He swiftly closes the distance between and gently takes your injured hand into his, inspecting it with a small frown. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you.”
“You could never scare me.”
Azriel raises an eyebrow, eyes lifting to meet yours. “Is that so?” He replies, a hint of amusement in his voice. “I think I may be going too soft on you then”
“Soft?” You exhale in an incredulous manner, remembering the way your last training session with Azriel had ended. 
He had taunted you and your Illyrian blood had heated at the challenge in his words, allowing him to coax you into combating him. Of course, you were no match for him. You had begun training only a year ago, thanks to Emerie’s invitation. Azriel had centuries on you. Your muscles were still aching from the aftermath.
Azriel chuckles. “Come,” he says, guiding you back into the house. His hand holds onto your wrist lightly, being careful so as not to hurt your injured hand further. “Let’s get you patched up.”
**
As Azriel carefully attends to your hand, you can’t help the way your gaze lingers on him. His features are tense with concentration and concern, unbothered by the dark fringe that falls slightly over his eyes. Your uninjured hand is itching to run through those dark strands and brush his hair back for him.
You swear your heart skips a beat when Azriel lifts his gaze, catching your brazen staring. A flush spreads across your cheeks, and you quickly avert your gaze, missing the subtle, self-satisfied smile that graces Azriel's lips.
The sudden intrusion of Nesta breaks the spell, her figure leaning against the doorframe with crossed arms, an amused twinkle in her gaze. While you were oblivious to Azriel's reaction, Nesta, caught the soft smile he allowed himself.
“Am I interrupting something?”
Both of you turn your heads to find Nesta. There’s a smirk on her face as her eyes flicker between you and Azriel.
“Uh, no. Not at all,” you stammer, attempting to mask your embarrassment. “Just a little injury, that’s all.”
“Nothing to worry yourself over, Nesta,” Azriel chimes in, lowering his gaze to secure the bandage wrapped around your hand. “All done.”
“Thanks, Azriel.”
Azriel rises to his feet, and the shadows that dance around his shoulders seem to buzz with excitement over the soft way you had said his name. He pats your thigh, suppressing his smile as he stands.
Nesta's smirk transforms into a sly grin, her keen eyes not missing the way Azriel keeps his gaze averted from you to save you from further embarrassment. It doesn’t matter, anyway. His shadows are happy to inform him of the mortified look you send Nesta’s way followed by the way you silently mouth “stop” at her. 
"Well, that’s great news,” Nesta replies, grasping your uninjured hand and pulling you to your feet. “Thank you for taking care of her, Az. Now, if you don’t mind, y/n here is late to girl’s night.”
As Nesta ushers you out, Azriel watches with a mixture of amusement and warmth in his hazel eyes. Unbeknownst to you, the unexpected emotions that had taken residence in your heart were mirrored in Azriel’s.
**
Under the soft glow of fairy lights, you sit cross-legged on the plush rug, facing Nesta while Emerie and Gwyn sit on either side of you. An array of snacks, provided by the sentient house, sits in the middle of the circle you and your friends formed. And of course, it wouldn’t be a girl’s night without the age-old game of truth or dare.
“Your turn,” Emerie grins at you, exchanging a knowing look with the other two females. “Truth or dare?”
Given the mischievous glint in Nesta’s eyes, it was an obvious choice for you. Truth would be the safer option. Emerie’s grin falters, disappointed by your choice.
However, Gwyn sees an opportunity. She wraps her blanket tighter around herself, shifting in her spot eagerly. She leans forward to grab a chocolate covered strawberry before nonchalantly asking: “Do you like Azriel?”
Nesta scoffs, throwing her hands in the air. “Oh, come on. Like we even have to ask.”
“True,” Gwyn giggles. “But I want to hear her say it.”
Heat rises to your cheeks for the third time tonight, creating a persistent warmth that makes you wonder if you might give yourself a fever. Your friends collectively hold their breaths in anticipation. Nesta’s gaze remains fixed on you, unwavering.
“Yes.”
The room erupts into squeals and teasing remarks, and your eyes widen, urging them to hush, terrified that Azriel, who is upstairs, might hear. It’s a futile attempt as their cheers only grow louder, making you bury your face in her hands.
“He likes you too.”
Your peak out from beneath your fingers. “What makes you say that?”
Nesta laughs in response but Emerie and Gywn are quick to tease you even further.  Gywn assumes the role of Azriel while Emerie assumes the role of you as they exchange glances and lingering touches. The two females jump to their feet and wooden swords appear in front of them. You look up with a glare directed at the sentient house.
With a swift flick of her wrist, Gwyn uses her wooden sword to knock Emerie’s out of her hand. “Again,” Gwyn nearly growls as she tries to mimic Azriel’s deep voice.
“I can’t,” Emerie replies, feigning shyness.
“I don’t sound like that!” You cry out in disbelief, turning to Nesta. “I don’t sound like that, right?”
Nesta shrugs her shoulders, eyes sparkling with mirth at the scene before her. Emerie and Gwyn ignore your protests, continuing to pretend to be you and Azriel.
“Oh, Azriel, my love,” Emerie swoons, the back of her hand flying to her forehead while her other hand hangs in the air. “I think I sprained my wrist.”
Gwyn gasps dramatically, diving in to catch Emerie before she could fall back against the fortress of pillows behind her. “No, not my sweet y/n, who I’m absolutely smitten with” Gwyn coos, bringing Emerie’s “injured” hand to her lips and kissing it.
Then, Gwyn and Emerie absolutely lose it, the two females falling onto the fortress of pillows as laughter consumes them, unfazed by the glare you’re now directing to them. Nesta stifles her own laughter, turning her attention back to you.
“He definitely likes you,” she repeats, her words awakening the butterflies in your stomach. You wonder if she can hear them fluttering too. “But he won’t make the first move. You’re going to have to do it yourself.”
“Absolutely not!”
 Nesta grins at you. “We’ll see about that.”
“Whatever,” you huff out. “It’s your turn now. Truth or dare?”
The night wears on, filled with more laughter, more shared secrets, and the occasional embarrassing dare. You got your friends back by daring them to have multiple spoonfuls of ice cream and tomato sauce. The house keeps you well supplied with snacks and your glasses of wine never go empty.
When it’s your turn again, you hesitate for a moment. You had thought “truth” had been the safer option but now, you know there is no safe option.
This time, you decide to be brave.
“Dare.”
"Fucking finally," Emerie grins, looking at Nesta while Gwyn smiles at you. Their plan is unfolding seamlessly...
“We dare you to kiss Azriel tomorrow after training.”
Your eyes widen in panic. “What? No way!”
Nesta, seemingly unfazed, inspects her nails with feigned boredom. "Coward," she mutters under her breath.
Her words, though hushed, ignite something deep within you. Your Illyrian blood stirs, the challenge resonating in your veins. Your eyes narrow, fixing on Nesta. "What did you say?"
Nesta meets your gaze as she repeats herself. Louder, this time. “Coward.”
The room falls into a hushed silence as your friends await your response. You bite your lip, contemplating the audacious dare. It was not in your nature to back down from a challenge.
After what felt like an eternity, you let out a deep exhale.
“Fine, I’ll do it.”
**
You didn’t sleep at all last night but as Azriel circles around you, his eyes holding a glint of challenge, you are wide awake. Emerie, Gwyn and Nesta watch from the benches facing the sparring grounds while Cassian watches from a closer distance, keenly assessing your every move. Too caught up in your feelings over Azriel, you had failed to realize that this morning’s training session was an evaluation of the skills you had been working on over the past couple of months.
To say you're nervous was an understatement because not only did you have to prove yourself as the aspiring Valkyrie you’d like to become, you also had to prove to Nesta that you were not a coward. Taking a deep breath, your grip tightens on your sword.
Azriel, with his wings casting shadows on the ground, moves with grace. Each movement is precise and deliberate as your swords meet in a flurry of strikes, the sound of steel ringing in the air. Though you struggle, you do your best to keep up and hold your ground, determination burning bright.
Sweat begins to cling to your skin and your envious of the way Azriel hasn’t even broken a sweat himself. With every strike of his and every parry of yours, he continues to push you, his strikes growing harsher and stronger. You literally blink and in that swift second, Azriel knocks your sword out of your grip. A hiss escapes you and you swear your hear Gwyn and Emerie snicker from the sidelines as they find this situation all too familiar.
With a sweep of his leg, you lose your balance and find yourself falling onto one of the training mats. Azriel’s lips twitch upwards as he points his sword toward you. “Do you yield?”
You are weaponless and at his mercy but your stubbornness continues to burn bright. “No.”
In a sudden burst of energy, you land a kick on him, knocking his sword out of his grip just as he did to yours. The bold move leaves him momentarily stunned, his shadows coiling back in surprise. You take full advantage of his distraction, hooking your other leg behind his knees and bringing him down to the mat with you.
Azriel can only blink up at you as you straddle him, eyes widening when he feels a dagger–his dagger–pressed against his throat. How did you–
He’s unable to finish his thought as you shift above him and swallows thickly at the sensation of your body on top of his. The way your breathing is shallow and uneven and the way he can feel the warmth radiating off your body–
“You will.”
Your words have his attention drifting back to you. A radiant smile breaks across your face and his own lips curl upwards, hazel eyes softening as they stare into yours. “I yield,” he murmurs, ever so quietly, you wonder if you imagined it.
Your gaze drifts down to his lips and then back to his eyes. He does the same. And then the next moment, you’re kissing him. Softly and hesitantly, at first, but when Azriel responds, your heart fills with warmth. Your lips move against his with eager urgency.
Truthteller falls from your grasp and you bring your hand to grasp at the back of his neck instead, pulling him even closer. His hands find their place at your waist to keep you in place but then screams and squeals are piercing through the air. You’re immediately pulling away and jumping to your feet, absolutely flustered because in the heat of the moment, you had forgotten all about the audience you had.
You glance down at Azriel, desperately seeking a sign, but his expression is a mix of surprise and confusion. He looks nearly petrified. Your heart races and you begin to wonder if perhaps, you are a coward because all you want to do is run.
Your hand flies to your mouth. Doubts claw at the edges of your courage. What if Nesta was wrong? What if Azriel didn't like you? And you've just made a fool of yourself in front of him–your teacher– and your friends. 
Turning around, your eyes meet with the delightfully entertained audience. Gwyn and Emerie, caught up in the drama, cling to each other with excitement and unrestrained giggles. Nesta stands with the same smirk she gave you the night before though there’s a flicker of surprise in her blue-grey eyes. She hadn't expected you to follow through with the dare.
Meanwhile, Cassian’s gaze is fixed on the body behind you and he throws his head back in laughter. Ignoring the whispers and amused glances from those around you, you hastily make your exit, blind to the way you left Azriel a blushing fool.
Cassian approaches his friend, who remains rooted to his spot on the floor. Azriel is still processing the whirlwind of emotions you've stirred within him. There’s a teasing grin on Cassian’s lips. “Are you okay there, Az? You look a little–”
Azriel snaps out of the trance you've cast upon him to glare up at his friend. “Fuck off.”
He then jumps to his feet, dusting himself off and ignoring the curious glances of the females nearby. Determination fills his eyes as his head turns toward the direction you ran off to. He fears you have misinterpreted his initial shock and he can’t let this moment slip away. 
He needs to feel your soft lips against his again and more importantly, he needs to tell you that he feels the same way.
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a/n: Hope you all enjoyed this one! Cas's version is already up!
tagging: @hellodarling1357, @kennedy-brooke, @scooobies
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rafey-baby · 1 month
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Been thinking about outlaw!rafe holding pogue!reader hostage in her own house after banging his fist on her door in the middle of a stormy night, demanding to be let in with a gun in hand and wild waves in the sea of his eyes.
cw: outlaw!rafe is more obx accurate in this so he’s pretty mean and manipulative, mentions of murder and violence and other dark themes, he’s also weirdly soft in the end?
wc: 2k
he's been stuck in my head for a while so hope u enjoy xx
part two part three
- - - - - - - - - - - - - -
There’s still sleep dust lingering in her lashes when she hesitantly cracks open the oak door at 3am, revealing a tall, scary man with scarlet stains on his big hands, white button up saturated in maroon and a scowl painted over his unsettling countenance.
She stands there like a deer in headlights, unmoving as he stares down at her with arctic eyes as chilling as the frigid waters surrounding an iceberg. 
At first, she thinks she’s still asleep, tired brain conjuring up some creepy murderer scenario where she’s the idiot who does everything the audience in the movie theater is screaming at her not to. But as she properly blinks her sleepy eyes open, she comes to the realization that this is not a horror film and this intimidating stranger (with oddly appealing features) who’s definitely just killed someone is very much real. 
She’s about to open her mouth and she’s not sure whether she was going to scream for help or simply stare at him with her mouth hung open in shock but she doesn’t get the chance to find out before he’s pasting a massive palm over her mouth. 
”Don’t make a sound,” his low mutter makes a shiver run down her spine.
And she doesn’t, instead she just blinks, too out of it to even move a muscle; the reek of the dried blood on his hand hitting her nose, making her face scrunch up. And she doesn’t know why she’s not putting up any sort of a fight, blaming it on the fact that half of her brain is still swimming in the lake of her dreamland; soaking up the glittering sunbeams that never dull and dipping its toes in the grass that consists of misty nebula and twinkling stars.
And he’s just so mean, ordering her around with a gun to her head, manhandling her around to his liking, grumbling about needing to stay at her house for a bit since he needs a hiding place from the cops after dumping a body somewhere in the ocean and getting caught. Apparently, his temper really just got the best of him at times. 
”I didn’t even mean to kill the guy, alright. He just kept pissing me off on purpose and I was provoked, what was I supposed to do?” He offers as an explanation that seems to do very little to soothe her overstrung heart that’s thudding in her ribcage. It’s loud enough for him to hear; almost as if she’s a terrified rabbit and he’s a big bad wolf, hunting down his prey. 
”I’m taking a shower now, and you’re not gonna move an inch, you understand? Cause if you do, I’m gonna have to hurt you, and I really don’t wanna do that, okay?”
She nods her head, unable to form any coherent sentences.
He takes note of the way her inhale gets caught in her throat when he steps closer to her, inquiring whether she lives alone or not, to which she just nods her head again. 
“Dumb girl”, he tuts, shaking his head in disapproval. ”When someone’s knocking on your door at 3am you don’t fucking open, alright?” 
She’s making it entirely too easy for him. 
The second he’s in her bathroom, she forces her exhausted brain to think; quickly coming up with a rickety plan as she listens to the water streaming down from behind the door. She waits for a moment, making sure the coast is clear before she bolts towards her bedroom, trembling fingers grabbing her phone from her nightstand and trying to dial 911.
However, her shaky hands don’t help her one bit when they drop the phone; the clattering sound of it hitting the floor echoing in the quietness of the room. 
She can’t breathe, her brain short-circuits as she bends down, reaching for the wretched device that has somehow tumbled under her bed. However, when she finally catches it in an unsteady grip she hears the shower turn off; an eerie stillness following. In her state of panic she fruitlessly tries to turn it back on and call for help but it’s proving to be harder than she thought when her lungs decide to stop working, her respiration shallow and her heartbeat ringing in her ears. 
”Boo,” a low whisper right behind her makes her blood run cold; a shiver traveling down her spine as she slightly jumps, a faint gasp leaving her. 
”Why did you just do that, huh? Told you, didn’t wanna fucking hurt you and then you go and pull this shit,” a strong hand is gripping her by her throat as he turns her around to face him. 
”I’m sorry, I...I don’t— ” she’s paralyzed, unable to move. 
”You don’t what, huh?” He stares into her horror-stricken eyes with an almost bored look, seemingly entirely indifferent to her torment. 
”Can’t…can’t breathe,” her voice is nearly inaudible, making a grim chuckle bubble out of his chest. 
”Can’t breathe? Maybe you should’ve thought about that before, yeah?” He scoffs, cruel words mocking her. 
”You’re so fucking stupid, want me to kill you, is that what you want?” He grits out as he squeezes at her neck, making her feel dizzy; gasping for air. 
”No! No, please. I’m sorry, I’m sorry. Won’t— won’t do it again, promise, I’ll do anything—” she manages to force out as he’s nearly crushing her windpipe in his unrelenting grip. 
”Anything, huh? That’s real tempting and all but what I need you to do is not pull stupid shit like this, you understand?” 
”I won’t, I promise. You can...stay here for as long as you want and I’ll help, okay?” she thinks she’s gonna pass out soon, stars peppering behind her fluttering lids and her weakened limbs starting to feel heavy. His coarse panting fills her eardrums as he seems to contemplate her offer for a moment. 
”If you even think about running to the cops tonight, I’m gonna fucking find you, you understand?”
She’s frantically nodding her head and at last, his hold begins to loosen around her trachea, allowing for her greedy lungs to finally suck in air as she takes a step back, trying to even out her respiration. 
He doesn’t say anything, silently observing her as she clears her throat, swallowing a few times as she tries to pacify her racing heart and calm the thoughts running around her head; trying to reassure herself that she’s still alive and she will stay that way if she just doesn’t rile him up anymore. 
He notices how her rounded eyes look up at him as he stands before her, smelling like her honey-scented body wash and orange blossom shampoo, nothing but a towel hanging low on his hips, leaving very little to her imagination as the room grows quiet. 
”What’s— um…what’s your name?” Her voice is creaky when she tries a different approach once she feels the flat floorboards under her wobbly feet again, a nervous hesitation overlaying her precarious question. 
”Don’t worry about it,” he simply dismisses her, but a small pout molds her mouth as she stares at him and he lets out a discontented sigh, rolling his eyes. 
”Rafe,” he finally responds, not bothering to ask for hers, seemingly not caring enough for it. She tells him, nonetheless and he laughs at her priorities. A literal criminal has broken into her home and she cares about fucking introductions. 
”So…have you— have you killed anyone else?” She doesn’t know why she’s trying to make small talk with him but she supposes if she gets him to talk about something, choking her to death won’t be at the forefront of his mind anymore. 
”You seriously wanna know?” He raises his brows.
She thinks about it for a moment and then settles on shaking her head, followed by a harsh chuckle rumbling out from his sturdy chest. 
”So, uh— what is it that you do? Like besides…killing people and stuff?” She tries once more. 
”Look, the less you know, the better, alright?” He simply states, making her let out a soft sigh in defeat. 
All of a sudden, a vigorous thunder crackles behind her windows, an ablaze lightning illuminating her dimly lit bedroom soon after. 
She flinches at the sound and the sinister way it momentarily lights up his face.
“You scared of a little storm?” He feigns concern as he peers down at her. 
“N— no,” she lies, forcing her face to stay neutral, hesitant about him finding out her weaknesses.
“Don’t worry. I’ll keep you safe, yeah?” The mocking grin on his face causes a shudder to travel through her as she swallows, wishing this was all just a nightmare she could wake up from.
- - - - - - - - - - - -
After that little incident, he thinks that she’s just as sweet as sugar, offering to make him tea and asking if he wants a blanket or an extra pillow so he’d be more comfortable sleeping on the couch.
He can tell that she’s merely doing it because she’s terrified of him, which she should be. Nonetheless, he thinks it feels nice to be pampered, doted on; to have a pretty girl following his orders like a trained puppy. Makes him figure he's gonna enjoy his stay just fine.
The following morning though, he’s woken up by her shaky figure standing next to his own tired form, pointing his gun at him. 
His softened bones feel mellow from the sleep and he lets out a sigh, rubbing at his sleepy eyes and shifts to sit on the couch cushions; teasingly lifting his hands up in surrender.
“Puppy’s got a gun, huh? Trying to be all tough now, are we?” There’s a lazy smile on his face. 
”I— I want you to…leave,” she says, voice rickety and words unsure. 
And he’s trying to take her serious, he really is, but it’s proving to be a little difficult since she resembles a scared little kitten more than someone who knows what they’re doing. 
”You want me to leave? Maybe you should work on your pitch, I’m not very convinced, you know?” The exasperating smirk plastered on his face makes her brows crease.
”Rafe, this is not a joke,” a scowl shades her face and he thinks she looks rather adorable. 
“Come on, Puppy. You’re not gonna shoot me. You don’t even know how to use that thing, do you?” His voice is even; she hesitates.
“Well, it can’t be that…complicated?” It’s more of a question than a statement and he really can’t keep the chuckle from bubbling out of his throat. Her frown deepens. 
“Why don’t you give it to me, yeah? You don’t want death on your conscience. Would break you, you’re too soft for that shit.” 
“You don’t— know me.”
“I know you enough,” he says, finally standing on his feet. He takes a slow step towards her and she squeezes the gun tighter in her trembling fingers. 
”If I give it to you, you’re gonna— you’re gonna…kill me. I don’t wanna die,” her words are hysterical, rushed. 
“Now who said anything about killing you? Look, if you give me the gun right now, I’m not gonna do anything. I give you my word, alright?” He’s towering over her, solid chest nearly grazing the barrel. 
“I don’t trust you,” her voice is a whisper. 
“I know, Pup. But I also know that you’re not gonna use that,” his steady hands are a contrast to her own precarious ones when he grabs for the firearm, slipping it from her weak fingers with ease.
“There we go, no need to be so fucking theatrical, yeah?” He lowers his head in order to lock his eyes with her frenzied ones.
“See? Not hurting you, am I?” 
She manages out a hum of agreement and then her waterline is brimming with water, salty droplets trickling down her cheeks as she chokes out a sob. “I’m sorry. I don’t—” 
“Hey, hey it’s all good. Mistakes happen, yeah?” He says and then his strong arms are wrapping around her trembling form because he’s not a complete monster and for some reason that makes her weep harder.
Her crocodile tears wet his shirt but he doesn’t seem to mind, big paw rubbing against her back. And it’s almost…comforting, she thinks as he starts to sway her from side to side, like he’s trying to calm down a crying child. 
“There you go, just let it all out and maybe you can chill out a bit, yeah? You Pogues can be so fucking dramatic sometimes,” he pats at her back, rolling his eyes as she takes in shaky inhale after shaky inhale until she’s feeling slightly more placid. 
”Shit, if I’d known you were such a crybaby I would’ve picked another house,” he grumbles, pulling away from her weakened form, pushing her back to stumble on her feet; setting the gun back on the coffee table with a clank.
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zyhkoo · 15 days
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☆ Birds of a feather
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angst, jason x gn!reader, ‘doll’ being used
Jason can’t love you the way you do.
a/n: hi everyone! my friend help me with this one, give a round of applause to her! i shall do my requests soon, i’m just busy.
You loved Jason, the two of you have been glued to the hip for who knows when. You have been there since he was still Robin, and now as Red Hood. Your bond was unparalleled, a friendship strong enough to withstand any storm. The kind of connection one only dreams of finding.
Everyone who knew the two of you was acutely aware of your unshakeable bond. It was an almost tangible presence, as if the two of you were tethered together by an invisible force. You were rarely ever seen without the other, so much so that your names were often mentioned in the same breath.
Jason's emotional struggles with romance were a reality that you had come to accept. Despite the deep connection the two of you shared, he was plagued by an internal turmoil that made the prospect of a romantic relationship unattainable for him.
You, for your part, had come to understand and accept this aspect of his nature, recognizing that the bond between the two of you was not defined by romantic love, but by a deep, unwavering loyalty and friendship.
You longed for the comfort of knowing that Jason would always be by your side, even in the face of death itself. The thought of him staying with you until you were laid in the grave, dead and buried, and carried away in a casket, brought an intense sense of security and comfort. If Jason ever decided to leave, you knew that you wouldn't be far behind. It was always him for you, and there was nothing that could change that.
Jason, too, was acutely aware of your unwavering loyalty to him. Knowing that you would follow him to the ends of the earth, no matter what hardships or trials he faced. It was a knowledge that weighed heavily on him, knowing that your fate was intertwined with his own.
Your unshakeable devotion stirred within him a complex mix of emotions- pride in your loyalty, coupled with a pang of guilt. Pride because he knew you would always stick by his side, no matter the consequences.
Jason was acutely aware of how much your unrequited feelings for him were causing you pain. Despite his own internal struggles with romance, he recognized that your love for him was deep and unwavering. He knew how much it hurt you for him to not be able to return your romantic feelings, and he felt immense guilt for causing you such pain.
He often struggled with the knowledge that he could never give you what you desired the most from him, and this realization weighed heavily on his heart. It pained him to know that he could never fulfill the romantic hopes and dreams of the one person who meant the world to him.
The two of you were in a bookstore, surrounded by stacks of leather-bound volumes and the scent of aged paper. Jason was the one who introduced you to the world of books. He led you through the labyrinthine shelves, his fingers brushing against the spines of the books with a reverence that spoke of his deep connection to the written word. The two of you shared a comfortable silence, both finding solace in the pages that surrounded you.
You took several books on the shelves, placing them in the small shopping carts that they provided. “I got enough for the whole summer,” you said, turning to him. “What about you?” Jason shrugged and picked up a few books to add to the cart, “I’m not far behind.”
He picks up a book, it was about a loyal man who reunited with his dead wife. He stood there for a moment, holding the book in his hand and staring at the cover. This was a tale that typically ended on a happy note.
But his thoughts lingered on a different kind of ending, one that didn't necessarily have a happy ending. He thought about the two of you, your unwavering loyalty and how despite your devotion, there wasn't the same romantic element present. You noticed the melancholy expression that crossed his face, and you could sense that something was weighing heavily on his mind.
You approached him, and gently asked, "Is there something on your mind?”
He looked up at you, his eyes meeting yours for a brief moment before he averted his gaze.
“It’s nothing, doll.” he responded, his voice trailing off as he absently flipped through the pages of the book in his hands.
You shrugged, not wanting to press him too much. You knew that Jason often preferred to keep his emotions and thoughts close to his chest, and trying to get him to open up could sometimes feel like pulling teeth. You busied yourself with the other books in the cart, trying to give him a moment to work through whatever was troubling him.
Eventually, the two of you arrived at his apartment, as he unlocked the door and ushered you inside, he felt a pang of unease in his chest. He needed to discuss something important with you.
“So, what are we doing? Movie night? Mario kart?” you said with a smile. Jason forced a smile in response, the tension in his chest tightening further. "Actually," he said, trying to keep his voice steady. "I wanted to talk to you about something. Something important."
A pit formed in your stomach, talk about what exactly? You placed your books down on the coffee table and looked back at his gaze. “Yeah, what’s up?”
Jason took a deep breath before speaking again. "I've been having somethin’ lately, doll." he said, his voice quieter now. "About our friendship."
Your heart sank a little at his words, your mind immediately jumping to worst-case scenarios. He doesn't want to be friends anymore, you thought to yourself. He's pulling away, getting distant. Was he going to say what you were dreading to hear?
Jason noticed the look on your face and quickly spoke up again. "It's not anything bad," he hurried to reassure you. "I've been goin’ through some stuff. And I think we need to talk about where we stand." You relaxed slightly at his words, albeit a bit puzzled. You looked at him questioningly, silently encouraging him to continue.
"Our friendship is... important to me, doll." he sighed, meeting your gaze. "You're the most important person in my life. But I can't jus’ ignore fact that..." He paused, his sentence hanging in the air. Your mind raced with possibilities, trying to decipher what he was trying to say. You could feel the tension in the air, and your heart was pounding in your chest.
"I know how you feel about me," he said, "I know you want more."
Your heart skipped a beat at his words. He knew. He had been aware this whole time, and he had said nothing. Your mind raced, a million thoughts and emotions swirling within you.
"I want to be honest with you," he continued, "And I don't want to hurt you. But I can't give you what you want. I can't give you that kind of love. It’s not something I can do."
Your heart ached at his words, the weight of them hitting you like a ton of bricks. You had hoped, deep down, that maybe he would reciprocate your feelings. But now, the reality was crushing your heart into pieces.
Jason's expression was one of guilt and remorse. "It hurts me too," he said, his voice tinged with sadness. "Seeing you wanting something from me that I can't give. It's like a constant knife in my chest, knowing that I can't make you happy the way you deserve." You held his hand “It’s okay,” you forced a smile “It’s okay if you don’t. My friendship with you, it's very important.”
Jason's grip on your hand tightened slightly. "You say that, but I know it's not true," he said, "I see the way you look at me doll, the way you longingly touch my hand or lean in closer. It's not just friendship for you, and deep down, we both know it."
Your heart clenched at his words. He was right, you couldn't deny it. But you didn't want to push him away or make him feel guilty for something he couldn't control. So, you just smiled again. "It's really okay," you repeated, trying to sound more convincing this time. "We'll... we'll make it work, right? Just us, as friends."
He knew that you were putting on a brave front for him, trying to downplay your own feelings in order to salvage the friendship. He wanted to say more, to try to explain the reasons behind his inability to reciprocate your feelings. But he knew that it would only make matters worse. So, he just squeezed your hand tighter, "Sure doll," he said softly. "Just us, as friends."
You softly chuckled “Doll,” you repeated “You never stopped calling me that.” Jason forced a smile, his heart aching at the familiarity of the nickname. It was one of the many reminders of your closeness, a testament to the deep bond you shared.
"Old habits die hard, I guess," he said. The irony of the nickname suddenly weighed heavily on him. Doll was a term of endearment, a term that typically invoked feelings of love and tenderness. And yet here he was, the person who had never been able to feel those things for her, calling her ‘doll.’
"I probably should stop callin’ you that," he said quietly. "No," you said quickly, not wanting to cause more pain than either of you were already experiencing. "I like it. It's... comforting, coming from you."
"If you're sure," he said quietly. You smiled softly, trying to reassure him that it was genuinely alright. "Yeah, I'm sure," you said, your voice full of genuine affection. "It's our thing, right? Don't overthink it."
He wanted to believe that things could continue as they were between the two of you, that he could still hold onto the one person who meant more to him than anything else in the world. "Okay, doll," he said, his voice cracking slightly, "If that's what you want. We'll keep it our thing."
When you come back home, you quietly weep. You don't know what you’re crying for.
"I don’t think I could love him more..." you whispered to yourself between sobs. The depth of your feelings for him was overwhelming, but the fact that he didn't feel the same way left you feeling empty and defeated.
Your mind was swirling with conflicting thoughts. Part of you wanted to keep the relationship as it was, grateful for the intimacy and companionship you shared. Another part of you wrestled with the frustration and pain of a one-sided love. Each tear that fell felt like a small piece of your heart breaking, but you couldn't bring yourself to walk away. Despite the pain, Jason meant the world to you, and the thought of losing him was unbearable.
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katsukistofu · 2 months
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hold me in your arms (like the night hugs the moon)
contents ౨ৎ ⋆ m. fushiguro x reader. fluff. no pronouns mentioned. ★ midnight cravings lead to hearing something unexpected.
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“Do you think about me?”
You bite your lip, inwardly cursing at the hopeful tinge in your voice. Where did that even come from? You just came to the kitchen to heat up your ramen, how did you get here?
Doubt claws at your insides as the intoxicating smell of his faint mahogany cologne that you’ve always thought smelled more like spiced apples and the honeysuckles from the hand lotion he likes to use tickles your nose. You try not to breathe in the familiar scent too deeply even though you really want to.
With his body still pressed flush against yours, Megumi studies you.
“Do you think about me?”
Your heart thumps uncomfortably in your chest. “I don’t.” Liar.
“I do.”
Your hopeful eyes flit to his, searching his face for any hint of a joke and his serious gaze stops you in your tracks.
“You still don’t get it, do you?”
And then suddenly he’s all over you.
Your brain numbly manages to process just how tall he is when he softly molds his forehead to yours. Like he can’t get enough of the warmth seeping through your flimsy pajamas and into his bare skin, and if he stopped touching you he’d start dissolving into ash.
It’s also getting even harder not to think about how good he looks. He’s just wearing his usual black, oversized shirt but you tell how hard he’s been training from the way his arms feel under your fingers right now.
You swallow, your mouth suddenly feeling very dry under his intent stare.
“Don’t get what?”
“Everytime I look up at the stars I see your eyes instead. When there are flowers growing on the side of the road, I can’t help but think of how much you’d like them.”
Megumi pauses, taking a moment to gauge your shocked expression, letting his gaze linger on your lips before looking directly into your eyes again.
“And whenever I pass by a stand making those stupid little custard filled fish, I remember that time you came whining like a baby to me about how bad your stomach hurt, even though I told you not to eat so many.”
His eyes stay on yours as you continue to gape at him. “So yes, I think of you.”
Your mouth opens once, then closes again, before you finally regain the ability to speak.
“You mean taiyaki, idiot. And I wasn’t whining that much!”
“You were. And I know what it’s called, smartass.” Rolling his eyes, he brushes his thumb against your cheek, trying to get something off.
“Hold still,” he murmurs. “Eyelash.”
“Oh.” Your voice doesn’t sound like yours when you speak. His touch feels so tender on your skin. “Thanks.”
“You’re welcome.” He leans in with a rare, tiny lopsided grin, which is way more attractive than it should be on any human and laces his fingers through yours. Oh.
He's so pretty that it hurts, and everytime he’s this painfully close your heart feels weird and more jumpy than usual and you swear that he knows what he does to you.
So close that you can see just how long his thick, dark lashes are which you’ve always thought just made him cuter ever since you went on your first mission together with him last year.
“You’re an idiot, by the way.”
“What?” You blink. Now he’s calling you dumb?
“I was planning to tell you all of this later at the cafe I mentioned in class yesterday.” He snorts, placing his hand on your head. “You know, at a normal, socially acceptable time to confess. Do you always need to be so impatient?”
Warmth flares in your cheeks. “No one told you to say all of that!”
“Really? Huh.” Megumi’s mouth twitches slightly. “Guess I’ll pretend this never happened, then.”
“That’s not what I meant.” You’re twisting the ring on your pinky finger.
He lifts a brow. “What did you mean then?”
“I mean… I like you too. A lot.” You mumble. Megumi’s free hand squeezes yours in response and your stomach flips.
“Good.” His lips quirk up. “Now put your ramen in so we can go to bed.” He nudges you in the direction of the microwave.
“But yours is still in there!” You protest, feeling a little light-headed from the sudden change of subject. “I was going to let you heat it up first.”
Megumi scoffs. “The microwave’s big enough for the both of us. Hurry up.”
The small smile that blossoms on your lips causes Megumi to look away and hide the growing blush on his face. “Okay.”
Right after you put your ramen cup next to his and press the timer’s button for three minutes, Megumi loops his arm under yours and around your waist, tugging you to his side with such ease that your brain goes numb.
“Hey.” He murmurs against your ear.
“Hi.” You say shyly, resting your hands just below his shoulders.
Megumi looks right into your eyes, before he speaks up again.
“I adore you.”
The words are so simple, and he says it so plainly like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. The moon rises and sets, fire is hot, the earth is round, and Megumi adores you.
You shiver when he brings you even closer, closer than before, making you exhale shakily against the column of his warm neck while your fingers grasp the fabric of his shirt tighter.
Megumi’s lips skim across your forehead with an aching softness, brushing against your skin as he murmurs once more before the microwave dings, signaling that the both of your cups of ramen are ready.
“Don’t forget that, stupid.”
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megumi ‘igaf’ fushiguro
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andvys · 1 year
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I knew you'd linger like a tattoo kiss | part 3
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Warnings: angst, hurt/no comfort, mentions of sex, mentions of cheating, mentions of emotional abuse (Chrissy’s mom), absent parent, daddy issues, jealousy. Billy being Billy… it’s not what you think
Pairings: Steve Harrington x fem!cheerleader!reader , Steve Harrington x Nancy Wheeler
Summary: Someone you don't want to see shows up at your doorsteps.
Word count: 6.7k
Note: @mysticmunson thank you for helping me as always, you're the best! @somethingvicked thank you for the idea with Billy, it's working perfectly for this story
series masterlist
-
Steve had been so on edge ever since he found out about you and Billy. He knows that Tommy and Carol aren’t the most honest people. They strive off of chaos, they live for the drama and the lies and constantly make up new things to gossip about but for some reason, he believes their words this time. Billy had been following you around ever since he broke up with you– he had been running after you for some time now but never like this. You always rejected him, you were taken and not interested but now Steve can’t help but wonder, were you truly not interested or were you just rejecting him because you were with him? Were you secretly into Billy all this time? The thought of it makes him feel sick. 
He sits in his car, bouncing his knee as he stares out the window, waiting for his girlfriend. The parking lot is filled with students, he hears laughter and different voices. He sees Billy walking towards his car, the usual smug and arrogant look resting on his face. He straightens up, looking around to see if you’re around too, wanting to see if you will get in the car with him. What will he do if you do get into his car? 
“Hey!” 
Nancy’s voice startles him a little, he tears his eyes away from the blue camaro and turns to look at his girlfriend. 
“Hey Nance,” he smiles. He instantly leans closer to her once she’s seated, she meets him halfway, kissing him on the lips. Her eyes are closed, his are open and they flash with curiosity when he sees you through his window. You look his way and it’s enough for him to tense up. 
He expects you to get into Billy’s car but instead you go the other way, you pass by his car and look straight ahead, pretending to not see him or her. He breaks the kiss, Nancy doesn’t seem to mind, she leans back and puts the seatbelt on as she begins to talk about her project. Steve hums and nods along, turning his head to see where you are going. 
Are you going to Heather’s car? To Chrissy’s car? It turns out to be neither of those, instead you leave the parking lot and walk into the direction of the football field. Where are you going? 
“I figured that we could rent a movie tomorrow since we can’t hang out tonight,” Nancy says, “I really wanna get it done. It’s been nice to hang out with Jonathan again though, we should all go out together sometime!”
“Sure,” Steve mumbles and turns back to her when he no longer sees you. 
Her brows are raised and a confused smile is on her lips, “were you even listening?” 
He nods, “yeah, you want me to hang out with Byers,” he says with an eye roll. 
“Hey,” Nancy mumbles, hitting his arm, “he’s nice, you just gotta get to know him.” 
“Sure,” he chuckles, running his fingers through his hair, “nice.” 
Nancy shakes her head at him, raising her arm, she pulls down the sun visor and flips open the small mirror, a piece of paper that was tucked into it falls into her lap. Her brows knit together as she looks down at it. She picks it up, it’s just a simple brown paper that was ripped out of a notebook, she turns it around. Annoyance bubbles inside of her when she sees the writing on the note. It’s not much but it’s from you, it’s not signed but she recognizes your handwriting and the little heart, only you draw it like that. 
I love you 
She presses her lips together and glances over at Steve who is staring into blank space. 
How long has the note been here? Does he even know that it existed? 
“Here,” Nancy mumbles and throws it into his lap. 
Steve glances at her first, brows furrowed and lips parted, he notices the annoyed look on her face. He looks down at the note in his lap. Oh. 
“I didn’t know you still kept her things.”
Steve blinks as he stares at your handwriting. You drew a little heart next to your I love you. He swallows harshly. The weird feeling in his chest returns yet again. He didn’t even know the note was there– you did things like that all the time, leaving little notes everywhere for him to find. He kept them all. 
“I don’t,” he lies as he puts the note in his pocket after folding it, “I didn’t even know it was there. I’ll throw it away later.” 
Nancy nods, eyeing him from the side. She doesn’t like the way he folded the paper so neatly. He should’ve crumpled it up and thrown it out the window. 
“Okay.”
-
The scented candles in your room are lit, making the air smell like pumpkin spice and cinnamon. The light of your salt lamp makes everything appear softer, you never use the big light in your room, you hate it. The police’s every breath you take is playing in the background. 
“Are you going to the winter formal?” Chrissy asks as she flips to the next page of her new fashion magazine. You are both laying on your bed, the decoration pillows all over the floor. You look at the pretty dresses in the magazine. You would be wearing one of those next Friday if Steve wasn’t such a cheating asshole. 
“Nope.” 
She glances at you with a sad look in her eyes, “we could go together.” 
You give her a small smile as you shake your head. 
“No, it’s okay,” you say, “I don’t feel like going anyway, he’s gonna be there with her.” 
She sighs, her lips are set in a frown, “you know, I never liked him. As much as I hate to say it, I’m not surprised about his actions but Nancy?” She mumbles, “who would’ve thought that she’s such a.. bitch.” 
“Yeah, looks deceive, huh?” 
“Totally.” 
You told your friends about what Nancy said in the girls bathroom when she didn’t know that you were there. 
“She looks like one of those church girls.” 
A surprised laugh leaves your lips, “a church girl?” 
“Yeah, she wears those ugly long skirts and those preppy blouses that my mom forces me to wear when we go to church on Sunday’s,” she mumbles, rolling her eyes. 
“Is she a church girl?” You ask. 
She snorts and shakes her head, “I don’t think so, I’ve never seen her around.” 
You nod. 
She flips to the next page, eying all the dresses before her eyes land on the ugliest one, a giggle falling from her lips, she points at it with her pink nails, “looks like something she would wear.” 
You can’t help but laugh. 
“And that’s why she won’t ever be prom queen, that’ll be you,” you say, expecting to see a smile on her face but instead it falls and a frown settles in her features. 
“It’s not prom yet,” she mumbles, “and I don’t really wanna be the queen to some asshole’s king.” 
Raising your brows, you tilt your head as you look at her. Cupping your cheek, you lean your elbow on the pillow beneath you, “you mean, you don’t want to be Jason Carver’s queen?” 
A look of disgust crosses her features and she shudders at the mention of his name. 
“Mom forces me to go with him,” she says, looking like she’s ready to break down out of frustration, “I don’t want to go with him.”
Your gaze softens, you place your hand on her back, “then don’t go with him.”
She keeps her eyes locked on the magazine, “you know how my mom is, I can’t just not go, she’ll make my life a living hell if I don’t do what she says.” 
You never liked Chrissy’s mother, she was always horrible to her. Always pushing her to do and be ‘better’, forcing her to associate herself with people who already climbed up the social ladder, like Jason Carver. 
You sigh, wishing you could help her. 
“What if you just stop doing what she wants you to do?” You shrug. 
She sighs and opens her mouth to speak but you cut her off, holding your hand up, you sit up on your knees, “I know, I know, easier said than done but–” you pause, looking around your room, you eye the freshly washed and ironed cheerleader uniform, the cassettes in the little box on your floor, bands that are his favorites, singers that your friends love so much, you stare at the baby pink wallpaper and the colorful clothes in your messy closet– you should’ve closed the door, the sight of the mess makes you want to groan in annoyance. 
“But?” Chrissy mumbles as she waits for you to continue. 
You blink, tearing your eyes away from all the things in your room that you didn’t come to like on your own. You look back at your best friend. 
“If you do things for others, if you do things because they want you to do them or because they expect you to do them, because they like those things– you will end up feeling miserable at some point, you will lose yourself and one day you’re gonna realize that you don’t even know yourself, that you don’t even know what you like, what you truly want or… who you even are..” 
She lets your words sink in. For a moment it’s silent between the two of you. You look down at your hands while she stares at you. Sadness and realization crossing her features. You are trying to help, she knows it but you are also realizing something about yourself, she can tell by the lost look in your eyes. 
“I know that things would be tense if you just started going against her stupid rules or wishes but you can always come to me if things get tough at home,” you say, reaching out to take her hand, “I’m here and you know my mom won’t mind you staying with us.” 
Her eyes light up at your words, a smile tugs at her lips, she turns her hand around and squeezes yours, “you’re the best, you know that right?” She whispers. 
You smile at her words, you tilt your head, “no, I’m not.”
She frowns and rolls her eyes, “yes, you are.” 
“Says who?” You chuckle. 
“I do,” she says, proudly. 
“Oh,” you smirk, leaning closer to her, you don’t notice the way her eyes widen or the way her cheeks flush a little red, “you do, huh?” 
She blinks, her lips part and she stares at your face. Your face hovers over hers for a second before you lay back down on your bed and reach for the bat shaped pillow, the one you excitedly bought for your ‘halloween’ decoration, hugging it to your chest, you stare up at the ceiling, not noticing her stare or her tense body. 
“A-Are you sure you don’t wanna come to the winter formal?” She asks again. 
“Yeah, I’m sure.”
She looks down at her hands, “okay,” she frowns. 
“Hey,” you whisper, glancing at her, “you’ll still have fun.”
“With Jason?” She mumbles, rolling her eyes, “I doubt that.”
“You can still go with someone else. If your mom is gonna act like a bitch, I’ll kick her ass for you.”
A giggle falls from her lips and she shakes her head as she looks at you with a smile on her face. 
Rolling on your side, you prop your head up on your hand. Curiosity sparks inside of you. 
“Who did you really want to go with?” You ask, “I know there is someone.” You notice the blush on her face and it only deepens the longer you stare at her. 
“Oh uh–” she chuckles nervously, “n-no one, I just, I don’t wanna go with Jason.” 
“Are you sure about that?” 
She nods. 
“You don’t have to be embarrassed, you know that, right?” 
“I-I’m not.” 
“Good, we’re best friends, we tell each other everything, right?” 
“Yeah,” she whispers and gives you a smile that doesn’t really reach her eyes. “I’m gonna go now, I still have to study for the math test tomorrow,” she groans. 
“Oh.. yeah,” you mumble, trying to hide the disappointed look on your face. You hate being by yourself, there’s too much going on in your mind when you’re all alone in this house– you used to love it but ever since he left, it’s just been hard. “I gotta start working on the assignment.” 
Chrissy rolls her eyes just the way she did when you told her about who you got partnered up with. 
“You know, you could still take Billy up on that offer.” 
You snort at her words, “I don’t think we need Billy to kick his ass, Heather will do.” 
“Did you know that she accidentally bumped into him at Nick’s party last weekend? He was holding a drink and it got all over Nancy,” she giggles. 
Your eyes widen, you can’t even fight the grin off your face, “no way?” You gasp.
“Yes way,” she laughs as she reaches for her backpack, “he got all pissed and looked like he was ready to fight but when he saw Heather, he got all quiet– he even looked scared.” 
“He should be,” you chuckle. 
“And Nancy got all hysterical and ran off.”
You snort, “she deserved it.”
“She deserves worse for what she did– they both do,” she sighs. 
She never liked Steve, even before you started dating him, she couldn’t stand him. His presence annoyed her and more so when you two got together and she had to watch how he continuously messed with your feelings. 
“Yeah well, I don’t care anymore, I’m moving on…” 
She knows that there is no truth behind your words, you are not moving on. You still love him, she thinks that you always will. You always looked at him like he was the only light in your life, like he was the one who hung every star in the dark sky, it made her hate him even more because he never looked at you like that. 
“I’ll walk you to the door–”
“No, it’s fine,” she smiles, “you don’t have to.” She walks towards you and pulls you into a hug, “I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?” She squeezes you tightly before she lets go, giving you another smile. 
“Yeah, still gotta help you pick out the right shoes for your dress,” you say. 
She nods, “and maybe I’ll manage to convince you to come, after all,” she says as she pulls away and begins to walk out of your room, “I’d rather go with you than Jason,” she says quickly before she turns around and leaves the room, saying ‘bye’ in a sing song voice. 
You chuckle and throw your head back against the pillow. 
“Jason Carver,” you mumble in disgust. Not a single person could ever force you to go to the winter formal with him but Chrissy’s mother is the epitome of an evil witch, you know that she will make her life more miserable if she doesn’t do as she says. You understand why Chrissy would rather suffer through the night with him than risk a fight with her mother. 
Not even five minutes after she left, the doorbell rings. Looking around the room, you try to see if she forgot something, that’s what usually happens when she leaves, she rushes back in a few minutes later because she left her keys or something else. Sighing, you push roll out of bed and rush out of the room. 
The doorbell rings again. 
“I’m coming!” You call out, “since when are you so impatient..” 
Your socks are a little slippery on the hardwood floor, careful not to fall, you hold onto the railing as you hurry down the stairs. Grabbing the doorknob, you are already smiling in amusement, “let me guess, you forgot–” with your words caught in your throat and your smile falling quicker than ever, you only manage to stare at him in confusion. 
There he is, Steve Harrington, standing on your front porch with his hands in his pocket and an unreadable expression on his face. What does he want? 
Even though it was him who came here to see you, he stands frozen in place. He stares at you and you stare at him. You are both frozen, time stops, everything stops moving, right now, it’s just the two of you in this world. 
It’s the first time you look at him again, properly. All the sadness, all the pain and the longing comes creeping back. It was there all this time, hidden beneath all the anger but it was easier to deal with it when you started pretending like he didn’t exist anymore, when you forced yourself not to look at him anymore, when you threw all his things away, when you let go of him. How dare he show up here? 
Steve watches the way your eyes flash with confusion, anger and sadness, they soften for a split second. This is the first time you actually look at him again. This is the first time you are forced to acknowledge his presence again. A feeling he can only describe as relief rushes through him when you finally look into his eyes again. 
It feels like forever that you look at each other when in reality only a minute passed since you opened the door. You blink and take a step back, rolling your eyes, you go to shut the door without wanting to hear an explanation as to why he is here– “no.” Is all you say before slamming the door in his face but he is quicker than you, he always was. He places his palm on the door, stopping you from closing it, “wait–”
“Get lost, Harrington.” 
He sighs, he didn’t expect anything else from you.
You try to close the door again but he doesn’t let you, keeping his palm pressed against the wooden door, he stares at you with a stubborn look on his face. God, you want to punch him. 
“What do you want?” You ask as you finally give up and let go of the door, you cross your arms over your chest and take a step back, not looking into his eyes. You raise your brows and glare at him when he invites himself into your house, he shuts the door behind him. You shake your head in disbelief. 
He is wearing the stupid flannel that you used to love so much, the one you always stole from him– does it still smell like you? 
“We have to work on the assignment together.” 
Is he serious? 
“I told you, I’ll do it myself,” you snap at him before you turn around and make your way into the kitchen in hopes that he will leave but instead, he follows you into the kitchen. 
“We’re partners, it wouldn’t be fair to let you do all the work by yourself.”
You clench your jaw at his words, how ironic of him to say that. Turning the light on in the kitchen, you walk towards the fridge and open it, distracting yourself from his presence by staring at all the food and drinks. 
“Oh, don’t worry, I’m used to doing all the work myself, my previous partner wasn’t much of a help,” you murmur, “in any way.”
Steve scoffs at your words, though he looks down in embarrassment, knowing exactly what things you are talking about. He places his hands on his hips and glances at you through his lashes, he eyes you for a moment before he speaks up, “listen, I-I wanna do better in school and I really want to work on this assignment.” 
You close your eyes, shaking your head, you take a deep breath. Why did he have to sit next to you today? 
“Since when do you care about being better in school?” You ask in annoyance, reaching for a water bottle, you close the fridge again and turn around to face him. He breaks eye contact the moment you raise your brows in question. 
He shrugs, “I wanna graduate next year and Mr. Higgins said that I–”
“Don’t care,” you interrupt him and sigh of boredom. 
He looks a little taken aback, furrowing his brows, he stares at you for a moment as he presses his lips back together. When he came here, he didn’t expect you to be so.. mean. Steve only ever knew you as the sweet girl, not once did you treat him badly in all the years he has known you. You never gave him the cold shoulder, not even when he deserved it. You were always kind, gentle and forgiving. 
Heartbreak changes a person but not like this, right? What happened in those two months ever since he left? 
While Steve tries to figure you out. You try to figure out how to handle this situation. 
Should you curse him out and kick him out of your house and show him how hurt you still are? Should you really give him that satisfaction? Or should you pretend to be okay, give him the cold shoulder that you should’ve given him years ago and act like you are fine with this, with working with him? 
You opt for the latter. You don’t want him to see the power he still has over you. You don’t want him to see how much you still want him.  
You can feel his eyes on you, burning into you, it makes your skin crawl. 
You take deep breaths before you look back up at him. 
“Don’t you have better things to do on a Thursday night?” You scoff. You know damn well that he never worked on homeworks or assignments when he was still with you, he had ‘better’ things to do. You were the one that did all these things for him. 
“Can we just work on this?” He sighs.
You roll your eyes and shrug, “yeah.” 
Surprise flashes in his eyes, he didn’t think that it would be that easy to convince you to work with him. For weeks, you wouldn’t even look at him, you wouldn’t even glance into his direction. He figured that it was because of how hurt you were after the breakup but now he begins to doubt that that is why you stopped acknowledging him. 
“Come on then,” you mumble as you make your way out of the kitchen, brushing past him. He nods, looking down at the floor, he turns around and follows you into the hallway, turning the light off on the way out. 
It feels weird to be back in your house, it feels so familiar yet so… strange. There isn’t much in your room that has changed since the last time he had been in here– only the lack of his things is noticeable to him. The bottle of his cologne that used to be on your dresses is gone and so are the collection of polaroids. He frowns, a weird feeling tugs at his heart. You got rid of everything. It shouldn’t bother him as much as it does. He looks around the room that haunts his dreams– a piece of clothing that neither belongs to you or him is draped over the chair by your desk. It’s a black denim jacket. Clenching his jaw, he wonders if it belongs to Billy. The thought of you wearing his clothes, of you being with him makes him so.. angry. 
“Are you just gonna stand there?” You mumble without looking back at him. You are already back on your bed with your notebook in your lap. He stares at you, the moment feels too familiar. He remembers climbing up to your window one night, he wanted to surprise you with flowers. You were sitting on your bed just like you do now but instead of the notebook you had a magazine on your lap and you were wearing pajamas. You looked so cute. 
“We gotta settle on a topic,” you say and raise your head to look at him. 
Steve’s brows are still furrowed, he still stares at you. He feels confused, irritated and a little hurt. You seem so.. okay. You look at him and talk to him as though nothing ever happened. Are you okay without him? Are you happier without him? 
He blinks, snapping himself out of his thoughts, he walks towards your desk, he pulls out the chair and sits down. 
“Yeah.. what do you wanna write about?” 
You shrug, “I don’t know, we could totally write an essay about snakes, there’s one in my room, right now.” 
His lips part and his face scrunches up in confusion, it takes him a moment to realize what you mean. His shoulders slump and he scoffs, “very funny.”
“I know,” you smirk. 
“We could write about basketball–” 
Your scoff cuts him off, causing him to roll his eyes. 
“Or about cheerleading–”
“Are you crazy?”
“I think you know more about cheerleading than I do, you were the one who convinced me to do it after all,” you say, tilting your head at him, “remember?”
He leans back in the chair, spreading his legs, he nods at your words and clenches his jaw, “yeah..”
There is so much tension in your room, his presence makes you angry. 
After the initial shock subsided and the sadness turned into anger, you began to curse him for what he did, especially when you found out that he had kissed her while he was still with you. That is something you will never forgive him, the lies and the cheating. 
The anger makes you feel stronger, it keeps the sadness away, for the most part, at least. 
“How about we do something more classy– although, you don’t do classy, so…” 
Steve rolls his eyes at your words, “not like you do it either,” he mumbles. 
You snort, not showing him the anger or the annoyance that you are feeling right now. You tilt your head and stare at him in question.
“I mean, given that you fucked Billy Hargrove out of all people,” he says with a looks of distaste on his face. 
What? 
You almost laugh in his face but you hold yourself back. 
He eyes your expression slowly, waiting for a reaction. He expects you to scoff, to look caught, to look embarrassed, to blush or to deny it all– just the way you always denied your attraction to Billy every time he brought it up but he gets nothing from you. Absolutely nothing and it only fuels his anger even more. The burning in his chest and stomach worsens when you look at him with a straight face. 
You look at him for a while, not moving, not saying anything, he can’t even read the look on your face. After a while, you sigh and look down at your notebook, “so how about we write an essay about Romeo and Juliet?” You ask, “you know, since it’s the only book you actually ever touched.” 
His brows knit together, his cheeks grow red, “are you not gonna say anything?” 
His irrational anger amuses you a little but you don’t show it. 
You look at him through hooded eyes, not raising your head, “I just did?” 
He rolls his eyes and stands up, walking towards you, “I mean about Billy.” 
“What about him?”
“Did you sleep with him?” He asks. 
His eyes flash with desperation. He wants to know, he needs to know. 
How ironic it is to see him beg for an answer when he has no right to even get one. He never gave you the truth so why should you? You are not his anymore.
His eyes are pleading. Why does he want to know? Why does he even care? He has the girl he truly loves, why should it matter what you do or who you do it with? 
“So, I’m not sure if you remember the story but in Romeo and Juliet, there’s obviously that tragic ending so–”
“Y/n,” he sighs. 
You close your mouth and glare at him, you used to love hearing him say your name, now you hate it. 
“Would you rather write an essay about Billy Hargrove?” You ask calmly, giving him a fake smile. 
“No,” he rolls his eyes. 
“Good, cause I don’t either.” 
He runs his fingers through his hair and huffs in frustration, closing his eyes, he pinches the bridge of his nose. 
“We could write about pride and prejudice.”
You lift your chin and look at him in surprise. You used to reread that book all the time, he knows it’s your favorite– he used to steal it out of your hands, reading some of Mr.Darcy’s lines in a mocking way, back then it made you laugh. 
“You didn’t even read it,” you murmur. 
“I can read it now,” he shrugs, “you still have it, right?” 
“We got a week to finish the essay, Steve. It’ll take you days to even finish and understand that book so don’t even bother–”
“No,” he says stubbornly, “I want to.”
You throw your hands up, “why?” 
‘Cause you wanted to choose the book for your next essay, you told him that weeks before.. her. ‘Cause you love it so much– or used to love it. 
He doesn’t look at you, he stares at the ground and shrugs, “just let me do it, please,” he says, “I can get started on the essay while reading it.” 
You try to figure him out. Why is this so important to him? He used to make fun of that book, of you reading so much. He would laugh whenever you offered to read it for him and now he suddenly wants to read it himself? 
Sighing, you get up and walk towards your bookshelf. You bend down and reach for the book before you turn back to face him. 
It feels weird to see him back in your room– a place he spent so many nights in, a place he used to kiss you in, a place he used to touch you in. 
“Here.” 
You hold it out to him, keeping distance between the two of you as though you are scared to come near him. His fingertips brush yours when he takes the book from you, warmth spreads across his skin and he finds himself looking at your face. 
You quickly pull your hand back and cross your arms over your chest, avoiding his eyes, “well, you should probably get started then,” you mumble, nudging your chin into the direction of your door, subtly kicking him out. 
“Yeah,” he breathes and looks back down, eying the cover of your beloved book, “what are you doing tomorrow night?” 
Just leave, please. You think to yourself. 
“Why?”
“Well, we could start working on it tomorrow,” he offers. 
“Yeah sure.” You don’t want to work with him, you don’t want to see him but agreeing to it will get him out of your house sooner, “I’ll call you.” 
“Okay.” 
You can feel his eyes on you, he is staring and it makes you want to both scream and cry. Leave, just leave. 
“I’ll get going.” He steps away, taking one last look at you before he turns around, “good night, y/n.”
You don’t say anything back, you stay silent, refusing to even look at him. You don’t notice the way he halts in his tracks when his eyes fall on the picture on your wall, the only one left of him. Steve knows that you didn’t keep it up because of him but it still makes something inside of him burn. There’s no other reminders of him left, only this one. You could have cut him out but you didn’t, you kept him there. His eyes soften and he glances at you. You are still standing there in the same spot, with your arms crossed and your gaze stuck to the floor. The urge to– no. He takes a deep breath and forces himself to leave. 
Your fingernails dig into your arms, you bite your lip as you feel the tears welling up in your eyes. The lump in your throat begins to grow. Why did he show up? You hear him walking down the stairs and it feels like forever until he reaches the door. The sob begins to threaten to escape. 
You slowly make your way towards your bedroom door, shutting it quietly. You press your back against it and look up at the ceiling. Tears roll down your cheeks the minute you let your guard down. 
“I hate you, Steve Harrington.”
-
Cold water dribbles down on him, making goosebumps rise up on his skin, he shivers at the feeling but sighs in content when he feels himself getting more energized again. Basketball practice tired him more than usual but that was probably because he stayed up all night, reading pride and prejudice. To his surprise, he ended up liking it more than he thought. Though he can’t stand Darcy for some reason. 
Another thing that kept him up was you. Your indifference, your lack of emotions, the anger and the sadness he had seen in your eyes the last time you had looked at him was gone. There is nothing in your eyes now, just simply nothing. It shouldn’t bother him, in fact, it should make him feel relieved to know that you are not hurting anymore but somehow it hurts him to know that you just don’t care anymore. 
He didn’t love you but you loved him, at least that’s what he always believed. 
Did you realize that you never loved him either? 
“What’s wrong, Harrington? Did you realize that you’re a shit player?” 
He can’t even help but sigh in annoyance. His jaw clenches and so do his fists. He waited until everyone was done showering, not feeling like interacting with anyone, he didn’t know that Billy was still around, if he knew, he would’ve been the first in the shower. 
He opens his eyes and glares at him. 
Billy looks at him with a smirk on his face, he turns the water on and closes his eyes as he steps under the stream. 
Steve decides to ignore him, turning his head away from him, he reaches for his shampoo with shaky hands. Just the presence of Billy is enough for him to shake out of anger. He hates him so much. 
“Heard you were at y/n’s house last night.” 
At that, Steve tenses up. How and why does he know? He keeps his eyes down as he begins to wash his hair. 
“Yeah, so?”
Billy chuckles, taking a moment to reply. 
“What were you doing there?” 
“How’s that any of your business?” Steve mumbles in annoyance. 
Billy shrugs, narrowing his eyes at him, “when assholes like you go to their ex-girlfriends house it’s usually to fuck,” he says, smirking. 
Steve shakes his head, “we’re working on an essay together.” 
“Mhm.” 
To his surprise, Billy keeps quiet for the remaining time. Steve quickly finishes up and leaves the shower after wrapping a towel around his waist, wanting to escape him as quickly as he can. 
Steve can’t stand to be in the same room as him for longer than a minute, he always felt that way about him but especially after hearing those rumors about you and Billy from Tommy and Carol. It still leaves a bitter taste in his mouth. 
Back in the locker room, he scrunches his face up in disgust, it smells like sweat, too much deodorant and cologne in here. No one is around anymore, everyone has already left. 
Steve reaches for his dirty clothes and stuffs them into his duffle bag before he starts getting dressed. He puts on a pair of boxers and his jeans and reaches for his belt when Billy walks back in. 
Steve’s jaw feels tense from all the clenching but he can’t stop it. Every time he sees him, he thinks of you and him together. He thinks of you being touched by him, of you being kissed by him, of you being– god, he can’t stand it. He can’t stand the thought of you being touched by Billy Hargrove or any other man for that matter.
He knows that there is a huge chance that you aren’t with him or with anyone else but he can’t be too sure. 
“Did you fuck her?” 
Billy smirks when the question finally tumbles out of Steve’s mouth, he knows that he has been dying to ask. He stays silent and puts his clothes on instead, taking his time with it. 
Steve puts his sweater over his head and turns around to face Billy, who is already staring at him smugly as he dries his hair with the white towel. 
Steve’s nostrils flare and he feels like throwing a punch at him already, he clenches his fists, fingernails digging into his palms. 
“Why are you asking a question that you already know the answer to?” Billy smirks. 
He stiffens a little, gritting his teeth and fighting the urge to do what he so badly wants to do. 
“I don’t know the answer, that’s why I’m asking.” 
“Why do you want to know?” Billy chuckles as he tilts his head to the side, he throws the towel back on the bench and puts his white tank top on, “you dumped her.” 
Billy walks towards him slowly, he looks confident, he always does. He looks directly into his eyes, the smugness remaining on his face. 
“Let me tell you something.” 
Steve drops his arms to his sides and puffs out his chest, raising his chin slightly. His heartbeat quickens, not out of fear but out of anticipation. 
“When you came to school with your new little plaything, she left. I found her behind the school, she was crying.” 
Nothing good will come out of his mouth next, Steve already knows it. The thought of you crying over him does little to mend the anger in his chest. 
“Wanna know what I did?” Billy asks, raising his brows. He licks his lips and grins a little as he steps closer. 
Steve nudges his chin up. 
“I took her home and I fucked her so hard that she forgot that you ever existed. In fact, I think a good fuck was all it needed,” Billy chuckles darkly as he looks him up and down, “‘cause you clearly never fucked her good enough.” 
Steve is seething, burning and trembling with anger. The smirk on the blond’s face is only fueling his anger. 
“Now I’m not the only one,” Billy smirks at the angry look on Steve’s face. His cheeks are red, the brown in his eyes vanished completely, all there is now is blackness. He is not just angry, he is in rage and Billy is loving it. “A little birdie told me that she’s been sneaking around with one of the stoners, so..” Billy laughs, turning around with satisfaction in his eyes.
Steve doesn’t know whether to throw a punch, to scream at him or at himself for feeling this way. He wants to throw up at the thought of you fucking Billy, of you sneaking around with some loser. 
Billy grabs his stuff, he puts on his brown leather jacket. He can sense Steve’s anger and it makes him feel more satisfied than ever. 
“Let me tell you a little secret, Steve. Girls like her, the ones who get left behind by their daddies, they’re a little damaged but they keep going. They still got a little hope left, but the moment they get their heart broken by some asshole they fall in love with, they’re damaged beyond repair. Even if you come crawling back to her and she ends up being stupid enough to take your sorry ass back, she will never be the same again. You crushed her poor little heart.”
Steve is breathing heavily, his knuckles are white from how hard he is clenching his fist. He would love nothing more than to finally throw that punch but he holds himself back, knowing that it will only make things even worse. 
Billy slaps his hand on Steve’s shoulder, narrowing his eyes, he chuckles, “loosen up, King Steve, go and get your little geek. I’ll take care of y/n, I think she’s better off with me anyways. At least she feels something when I fuck her.” 
And with that, Billy leaves him standing, knowing the damage he caused, it leaves him more satisfied than ever, to know that he messed with him— to know what it takes to mess with him.
next part
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only tagging friends!
@mysticmunson @wroteclassicaly @corrodedseraphine @corrodedcorpses @take-everything-you-can @imjuststeddietrashatthispoint @sherrylyn628
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kenzirr · 1 month
Text
Y/N was a force of nature, effortlessly charming and bold. She had taken a particular interest in Aaron Hotchner, and her playful flirting left him flustered more often than he cared to admit.
As they stood at the latest crime scene, Y/N leaned in closer to Aaron, her shoulder brushing against his. “Hotch, you know, I think the real crime is how serious you look right now. A little smile wouldn’t hurt,” she teased, giving him a knowing glance that made his heart race.
He cleared his throat, trying to focus on the evidence. “I’ll keep that in mind,” he managed, but her presence lingered in his mind long after she had stepped away.
One afternoon, she knocked on his office door and sauntered in without waiting for an invitation. “Hey, Hotch. Mind if I steal you for a minute?” she said, leaning casually against his desk, her body exuding confidence.
“I’m kind of busy,” he replied, but he couldn’t help but let his eyes wander over her, taking in the way she moved.
“Busy? Or just avoiding a good time?” she countered, a playful smirk on her lips. “You know you could use a little fun in your life.”
He chuckled softly, running a hand through his hair. “You certainly have a way of making things interesting.”
—-
On a flight back from a case, Y/N settled into the seat next to him, a subtle glint in her eyes. “Hotch, I was hoping you’d save me a seat. I’d hate to sit next to someone who can’t keep up with my conversation.”
“Is that so?” he replied, trying to sound casual while his heart raced. She leaned closer, her voice low. “Absolutely. You know I’m the most entertaining person you’ll find on this plane.”
“Right,” he said, feeling the heat rise in his cheeks as he tried to focus on his laptop.
—-
At the annual FBI party, Y/N approached Aaron, who stood at the bar, nursing a drink and trying to blend into the background. “You know, Hotch, you really should let loose once in a while. It’s a party, after all,” she said, her voice smooth and inviting.
“I prefer to stay focused,” he replied, but even he could hear the weak excuse in his tone.
She stepped closer, her smile warm and inviting, and he couldn’t help but steal a glance at her figure. The way her curves filled out her dress had his mind racing. “But you’re here now. How about we change that? Care to dance?”
He hesitated, his breath catching in his throat. “I think I’ll just stick with my drink for now,” he replied, trying to maintain his composure.
Y/N laughed softly, the sound rich and inviting. “You’re adorable when you try to be serious. Just remember, you can have fun while still being in control.”
—-
After all these moments, with his heart racing and mind spinning, Y/N finally found the perfect opportunity to ask him out. One afternoon, she walked into his office, her smile confident. “Hey, Hotch. Got a minute?”
“Always for you,” he said, his voice softer than he intended, feeling the familiar rush of warmth.
“I was thinking,” she said, stepping closer, her gaze steady, “it’s been a while since we had dinner together. Just the two of us. How about it?”
“Y/N, I—” he began, but she held up a hand, her expression playful yet sincere.
“Just think about it. I promise it’ll be worth your while. A night with me isn’t something you want to miss.” She tilted her head slightly, a knowing smile on her lips, and he felt his defenses start to crumble.
“Okay,” he finally replied, his voice low and tentative. “Dinner sounds… good.”
Y/N’s smile widened, her eyes sparkling with mischief. “Perfect! I’ll pick you up at seven. Wear something nice, Hotch.”
As she turned to leave, she glanced back over her shoulder, her expression teasing. “And just so you know, I can make a night unforgettable.”
With that, she walked out, her confident stride drawing his gaze. Aaron couldn’t help but stare, captivated, as he contemplated the new dynamic they had just entered—and how much he looked forward to exploring it.
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satoruhour · 1 year
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AFTERCARE
a/n: an aftercare collection from da old blog, enjoy! plus also i had an anon asking abt nanami aftercare !!! u read my mind lol / tagging @na-t0, @jabamin who do i tag !!!!!
wc: 2k
warnings: overall fluff, contains nsfw at the start, pet names for all, praise, protected sex, implied breeding, tickle fight (gojo), unprotected sex, creampie/breeding (geto & nanami), implied fwb, cuddling, unprotected sex, creampie/breeding (toji), n*sfw under the cut
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✶ GOJO
“oh, good girl, that’s it,” gojo mumbles out breathlessly, forehead against yours as you both come together. his lips continue to mutter out praises because he knew how much they affected you, and he hopes that you’d forget all of his saccharine words just so he could make you shiver and whimper all over again. your back arches into his hold one last time, digging your nails into his back.
“you did so well for me — shit — i didn’t think you still had any energy left,” gojo laughs breathlessly at how tired you two were after a mission, yet you know none of you could hold back on each other when passion took over. there’s a slight smile lingering on his face at your sweat-filled forehead and heaving chest and he loves, loves that he’s the only one to make you feel this way. the way moonlight weaves through the window makes you look stunning, and gojo’s smile can’t help but widen.
“what?”
he shrugs, removing his flaccid cock from you and eventually, the condom from himself. he ties a knot quickly, dumping it into the trash beside the bed, but before he can make a move to the bathroom to get you a wet towel, he feels your weight on his arm. it makes his heart flutter and sends shivers down his spine at the thought of doing away with contraception altogether — how would you look with his baby? who’s features would they get? what— 
“satoru.” gojo snaps out of his stupor, observing silently while you moved across the bed to him (hell, you sometimes forget he has a king sized), kneeling so you’d almost be at his height. “why were you smiling at me earlier?”
he eyes you with a levelled stare, grin turning into a smirk, “nah, no, it was nothing, baby.”
“hmm… really?” your arms hang limply over his shoulders, “i feel like i should know, you know.”
gojo simply winks, cutting off the teasing atmosphere with a deep kiss before he takes advantage of the situation, hands flying to your sides and you yelp, loudly. your laughter breaks through the quietness at 1am, making your stomach hurt and body squirmy.
“just planning a tickle attack s’all, princess.”
“y-you— fiend!” you try your best to escape the torture, but gojo is relentless in seeing you suffer, his laughter mixing with yours as his initial agenda is yet again interrupted. “satoru!” you both collapse into the soft sheets, giggles slowly subsiding to broad smiles as you admire the other, and him, you.
“god, you’re beautiful.” gojo’s stare bores into you and you avoid eye contact just like every other time he’s told you that, but your lover made it a point to make it clear to you.
“i love you, my pretty girl.”
✶ GETO
geto doesn’t stop giving you kisses even when he releases in you, helping you through the overstimulation by holding you tight until the euphoric feeling subsides and everything halts. there’s a moment of quietness, save for some concerned questions from your boyfriend like he hadn’t just blown your back out.
“sweetheart? you okay?” his eyebrows knit together, always worried that he might’ve hurt you in any way. but you’re always too tired to answer after, simply settling for a delicate hand to his face and a faint nod.
“kiss me,” it comes out as a whisper and dies out, dazed and still on cloud nine and geto indulges you like the lovestruck lover he is. even if he doesn’t need your palm to guide him, he lets your hand bring him right to your lips where they lay waiting. his kiss is soft, unlike before, moulding against your lips perfectly and like always, it makes you sigh and smile. “how’re your lips always so soft?”
geto smiles, hair falling from his loose hair tie. it shields his face and you think he looks like a greek god. “they just are, darling.”
your boyfriend’s always prepared when it comes to cleaning you up, so he usually has towels draped across the bedside table’s railing. wetting it with some water, he warns you gently with the free hand that strokes your thigh.
“but i also sorta use the lip balm gojo uses.” he cheekily admits, hand still diligently wiping at your core. he makes sure to cover it one, twice, thrice, before turning around to stand up. “i can buy it and we’ll share it instead.”
from here, his eyes skim over how the sheets cover you, and how your pose is provocative yet guarded — like an unnamed muse in a romanticism painting. there’s a teasing tone in your smile, a slow and languid drag to your movements. your dramatic gasp cuts off his thoughts, and your acting falls apart when you see geto’s jaw dropping in faux shock, “so you’ve been indirectly kissing your best friend this whole time? how dare you, suguru?”
geto slaps you lightly with the towel, laughing, “you’re crazy.”
“and that’s why you love me.”
he simply rolls his eyes, crawling back onto the bed to come face to face with you, the you who’s still feeling a bit playful, the you who grins at him and thinks that you like your suguru unkempt and messy and drunk in love with you.
the kiss tastes a bit like cigarettes, a little less prominent than earlier, but it tastes like him, nevertheless. “yeah, yeah. although, you’re the only one i’d wanna kiss — no one else, but you.”
✶ NANAMI
nanami groans into your neck with a final thrust, skin feeling the way your body shivered and trembled at how his cock twitches in you. he pumps you full, drinking in the moans of his name and he stays sheathed in you, face buried in your neck like none other. you realise it’s his favourite position — to stay close to you, to feel your pulse, to hear the almost inaudible sounds.
“you’re perfect, fuck,” nanami says, breathless, body propped up with his elbows by your ears; and of course you’ve heard your lover swear — at gojo, at some stubborn curse, at the terrible dishwasher in your home in kuantan and at you, sometimes, but never said like this. nanami looks at you like you’ve the breeze of the beach and the sunset that dips below the horizon.
you had the privilege of seeing that everyday, yet nanami choses to look at you each time, even if you’re always fixated on the scene. today you get the chance to see the love he has stored for you within his irises, and before you can retaliate, you feel his lips on you. nanami moans into the kiss, the need to feel you again taking over him as he deepens it, kissing down your jaw and neck and chest until you remember the abandoned pancake batter you were mixing.
“kento, honey,” he hums into your chest, acting like a child dreading school. “we can’t leave the batter out in the open.”
nanami grunts, “just leave it. i’ll cook eggs and have some kaya on toast or something later.”
“but that’s exactly why we decided to cook pancakes!” you laugh softly, hands running through his blonde hair. it’s starting to whiten a bit, too, but you don’t mind. if anything, he makes getting old look good, “to have a change from our normal breakfast.”
nanami sighs, blinking tiredly at you as he lifts his head to look at you, and every time he fails to resist your expression. you’re not even doing anything, sitting there looking pretty and your husband simply can’t fathom the action of saying ‘no’. he doesn’t want to move from his place — because your profile against the endless stretch of the ocean is a vision he never thought would come true.
nanami gives in, like he always does.
“fine, you win.”
you cheer with a big grin that escalates into giggles as nanami sweeps you off the sheets, placing a kiss against your temple. he smiles at you, at the possibility of living here until he dies; and if that possibility is compromised, he’d fight to make it okay again. he would bring them to hell himself if he could.
nanami kento never liked killing curses, but for you, he would spill blood again just to keep you safe.
✶ TOJI
toji never gave up the chance to fuck you stupid, always propped up in some dingy motel while the money from his sorcerer missions are left on the bedside table. he has yet to splurge it, the need to gamble getting less and less the more and more he sees you. he grunts into your hair behind as your hands make a mess of the vanity table — both too needy today to use the bed — one hand under your leg and the other on your waist as he spills into you.
“that’s a good girl,” your pupils are blown wide at the unexpected orgasm as his cum spurts into you, hitting you like a truck that you’re begging for toji to slow down until he pulls out and his cum drips to the floor. but you notice he doesn’t scoop it up and tease you like always, he doesn’t tell his little insults while slipping on his pants, nor does he avoid aftercare like the lazy and non-chivalrous man he was — no, you notice the silent movements of toji. he was never this quiet, surprising you even more when he sits on the bed.
“what the hell are you starin’ at?” his eyes are locked on the floor, the distance from your to the bed a few mere steps yet it felt like crossing the globe.
you swallow. after all, he was still a large, bulking man, and while his gruff voice did wonders, it always made you a little terrified out of sex. “oh— uhm, nothing.” with another sigh from him, your curiosity gets the better of you, inching towards him with cautious steps. “toji-san?”
his hands are hesitant to reach out towards you, but they make haste to grip onto your waist and although they’re nothing like the rough ones earlier, you still get a flutter in your heart at how big his hands seem to be. they wrap around your waist before his head falls onto your stomach. too scared to ask, you just settle for playing with his hair, content with the warmness of the embrace.
“you’re making me confused.”
frowning, you raise his head from his safe place, “how so?”
you’re careful, because you know about toji’s past through rumours, you know about his hesitancy to show vulnerability. you’re holding his heart, and you’re hoping the words you mutter out don’t shatter and make him bleed again. toji grunts, yanking you down to sit beside him before staring into space as the night winds down. you can both hear the rooms quietening down and the world going to sleep.
“i don’t like this.”
and your heart breaks, because of how toji hates love and how every experience has never ended positively. we fuck and i leave, got it? if you tell me you like me or something, i’m breaking this off. so you lean forward to hold his cheek, offering a small smile. ironic that he’s told you that and yet he feels like he’s the one who broke his own rule.
“it’s okay if you don’t, i’ll be here no matter how you’re feeling; i won’t even say a word.”
toji curls his lip in disgust, but you know he doesn’t mean it when he grabs your hand, “that line was cheesy. i fuckin’ hate it.”
“it was good, i liked it.”
he only shakes his head with a sigh and lies down along with a gesture that says are you coming or what? before your smile is uncontainable and you’re moving to his side. even if you’ve only known what his body feels against you, you’re already hoping it’d happen again and toji reluctantly feels the same, wrapping an arm around your waist with lips to your hair. your heart soars when he doesn’t move away from your hand interlacing with his.
“not a word.”
you giggle at his tone, and the harshness of it. and if you read in between the lines, you’d see that there’s a bit of endearment in him, you just hoped you had the rest of your life to make him love love again.
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stunie · 8 days
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UMEMIYA’S SHAZAM! — sfw ノ fluff ノ umemiya hajime x f!reader ノ entry for @melon-fodder / bofurin brothel’s music collab!! ノ in which a certain white haired stranger comes to you for some help…
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Your routine has stayed the same from the day you moved to Makochi. You’d say good morning to Kotoha at 7:30 AM. Eat breakfast at Pothos and enjoy a quick cup of coffee. And by 8:30, you’re already out the door and heading to work.
It’s not every day that a stranger startles you the way this one did. Your headphones are dangling around your neck now, hands lingering over them as you stare back at him. Wide-eyed and taken aback. Your music continues playing, and you can still hear it.
Maybe that’s why you didn’t hear him approach you.
“I really, really need your help!” He sits beside you, hands clasping together to plead. “You heard it, right?”
“Y-you scared me.” Your brows furrow. “My heart’s racing— you shouldn’t run up to people with headphones in and yell for help! I thought you were hurt.”
It seems to dawn on him suddenly. “Oh, you do have headphones in! No wonder you didn’t hear me earlier.” He lets out a sheepish laugh and rubs the back of his neck. “Sorry! I didn’t notice. You look so pretty— I completely missed it.”
You blink. “Me? Pretty?”
“Yeah.” He tilts his head a bit and looks at you. “Pretty.”
He says it so matter-of-factly that you’re not even sure how to respond. “O-oh. Thank you.”
The man in front of you gives you a bright smile at this. A little too wide— as if he’s confused as to what you’re even thanking him for.
“So..” you fiddle with your headphones. “What did you need help with? It sounded urgent.”
“Ah!” He perks up again. “I almost forgot. I really liked the last song that was playing. Did you hear it? I can’t find it..”
“Oh,” you almost laugh at how he’s already forgotten that you had headphones in for the second time that morning. “Sorry. I didn’t hear it. Did you catch any of the lyrics? I can try to guess.. if you want.”
“Eh? You can do that?”
You nod.
“I’ll sing it!” He’s much closer to you now. If he notices, he doesn’t seem to acknowledge it. You start to think he’s just a really oblivious guy, but it’s not a bad thing.
You think he’s cute.
You watch him with a small smile when he clears his throat, humming in thought as he tries to recall the lyrics of the song he heard. “Hm.. okay, okay. I remember.”
“Listen closely,” he smiles. “It goes like… mmmm. mmmm mmm… and I’ll sacrifice!”
Sacrifice? That doesn’t sound like Kotoha’s playlist.
The laugh slips past your lips before you even realize it. It catches you off guard— and the confused look he gives you only makes you laugh even harder. “Sorry, sorry, ah!” You cover your mouth with the back of your hand when it comes back ten times worse.
You’re forced to hunch over the table now. Completely oblivious to the way his eyes widen at how cute you sound. You look even prettier when you’re like this. But he doesn’t need to tell you that, does he?
It’s so obvious. That’s why he was confused earlier. You already know all this, don’t you? Warmth starts creeping up his cheeks the longer you laugh at him, and his lips feel a little wobbly now.
“Hey…” a crooked smile tugs at his lips when you try to apologize through a giggle again. “How mean. And here I was asking for help!”
You weakly slide your phone in his direction. “I think this should be the song…otherwise,” your voice cracks and you take in a sharp inhale to resist the urge to laugh again. “Otherwise I really have no idea.”
“Ah, so you do know! Old Love? By… hm… Putri Dahlia and Yuji. Okay. Old Love. Old Love!” He nods before standing up abruptly. “You’re the best, you know that? Thank you!”
“You’re welcome.” It’s the calmest your voice has sounded in the last two minutes. “Don’t scare other people on your way out.”
He gives you an eager nod before leaving, and you slip your headphones back on. He never even gave you his name, did he? You’re also not entirely certain if he would be taking your advice, but at least this time it wouldn’t be you getting jumpscar—
“Hey!” You almost spit out your food. “No way. I scared you again? You scare pretty easily, huh?”
This time, it’s his turn to start laughing, and you note that this is the third time he’s forgotten about your headphones in the span of fifteen minutes. Not that telling him again would help.
“This is for you. I almost forgot.” He drops a folded piece of paper into your hands. “My number! Oh- you can call me Umemiya.”
He points to the paper. “So you can help me find more songs. I’ll text you the lyrics this time.”
So now he’s expecting you to know what he’s singing over text too. It sounds impossible, but it wouldn’t hurt to try. It’s not like it you would get jumpscared over text, anyway.
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coco-loco-nut · 2 months
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Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus
pairing: logan sargeant x reader
summary: not all best friends are lovers.
masterlist ttpd masterlist
_______
Logan has been your best friend since you were in elementary school, and even when he moved away to further his career, you stayed close friends. Logan even sublets a bedroom in your Miami apartment so he stay with you when he’s in town.
It was obvious how much Logan cares for his friends, and maybe that’s why you couldn’t stop yourself from falling in love with your kindhearted friend. Oscar always said that the two of them needed you to be social for them, and that they should hire you to be their social media managers. You always refused, asking what an accountant would know about that.
It’s the off season now, and Logan is back home. The cozy apartment feels more like a home now, and the navy blue throw pillows don’t bring down the vibes as much anymore. You are on the phone with Oscar and Lily when you hear the front door open and close, two people stumbling in.
“You need to tell him, you are only hurting yourself,” Oscar says, reading your body language, watching the way that the blue LEDs in your bedroom reflect the sadness in your eyes.
“I’m okay, I have a date tomorrow,” you plaster a smile on your face. Lily doesn’t buy it, and neither does Oscar, but they play along.
“Keep us updated, that’s so exciting,” she says, hoping to take your mind off of what’s happening across the hall.
“Good night?” you ask Logan when he emerges from his room the next morning. The hurt in your heart pushes through the freeze that creeps in, a lingering hurt from one drunken night years ago.
“Did I wake you up? Sorry,” Logan runs his hand through his hair, you look away because despite him being your best friend you just can’t bear to see him. Despite everything, you can’t help stop the growing ice over your heart towards him.
It’s like every day you realize how much you have changed yourself for him, only for him to not care. He’s too addicted to the drug that is his current lifestyle to care about his best friend. The past ten years have been like this, and in your mind it was time to put yourself first.
Logan doesn’t notice your red dress, with your hair and makeup done perfectly, and if he did he never said. He did see you out on your date by accident though. He stops on the sidewalk, staring at you through the window. He calls Oscar on reflex, holding the phone to his ear without looking away from you.
“Osc, Y/n is on a date,” Logan says, processing what he is feeling.
“A likely place for her to be. She has a life outside of you, just because we are your best friends doesn’t mean she needs to dedicate every second to you like she has in the past,” Oscar replies, a little tired of Logan basically ignoring you.
“That’s not true,” Logan protests, but the hurt he’s feeling says otherwise.
“She’s changed so much for you. She wanted to move to Canada, but stayed for you. She’s defended you online against people who still say you don’t deserve to drive, hell, she’s stopped dating a guy because you were coming home. You have this idea of her that just isn’t true anymore,” Oscar rants, every word like a punch to the gut. Logan will always need his best friend, but he is realizing the truth behind Oscar’s words.
“This guy looks like he would’ve bullied us in school,” Logan watches as you laugh at something the guy says, and as much as he hates to admit it, you look happier than you have since he’s gotten home. Said guy is tall, taller than him, with the body of a gym bro but polished enough that he seems well educated.
“Good for her, she deserves to be happy, I’ll have to call her tomorrow and ask about it. Lily will want to know too,” Oscar’s tone changes, clearly happy to move away from being a middle man.
“You knew?” Logan asks, wondering why you didn’t say anything.
“Have you thought to ask? You live with her. Surely you noticed she was dressed up,” Oscar questions. Logan just watches you with someone else, not understanding why his heart hurts.
Logan thinks back to every time you changed, it was always related to something he said, and when it raised concerns in his mind, he simply brushed it off, not until you started being cold. You would’ve stopped, you wouldn’t have started to push him away if he said he loved you the way that you were, even as a friend.
Logan can’t help but wonder what it would be like to be the guy sitting across from you, your coldness broken away. Little did he know that the thought would shatter you if you knew, like ice breaking into millions of pieces.
Logan looks away, noticing you have that look in your eye, the same one from your belated 21st birthday. Sighing as he walks down the street, he plays back that night, traveling through the passages in his mind to find the memory.
You had drunkenly stumbled into him, impaired by the copious amounts of alcohol and newfound freedom. The next the both of you knew, you were in his bed, wrapped up in one another. Logan called it a mistake and you moved on, not wanting to dwell on it, lest you get hurt.
Logan goes back to your apartment, waiting for you to get home. He doesn’t know why he hates the idea of you being out with another guy, maybe it’s because you are his friend. He perks up at the sound of the front door opening, watching you walk in with a cheerful glint in your eye. He lets out a deep sigh before plastering on a smile.
“How was the date?” Logan asks as you sit on the couch across from him.
“I didn’t realize you noticed,” you warily say, confused why he is asking.
“I saw you at the restaurant you were at and Oscar told me,” Logan says slightly accusingly and you can’t help but shake an irritated feeling.
“Well, maybe if you cared more about my life and not just me as your socials manager, than you would’ve known,” you defend yourself. Logan feels a bit like a kicked puppy, especially since your words are true. “I’m going to bed, we can talk about it tomorrow,” you turn away, heading to your room.
The next morning comes faster than you’d like. Logan wakes early to get coffee and pastries, hoping to ease the tension.
“I can’t be your social media manager anymore. I need to do what I am really good at, and what I spent my time getting a degree in,” you say a little abruptly during the conversation.
“But I need you on race weekends,” Logan says, a bit crushed.
“Oscar hired me as his personal accountant, so I could still come to races, but it lets me spread my wings and start my own business,” you tell him, sipping your coffee.
“Let me hire you then too,” Logan offers and you quickly shoot him down.
“No, you struggle to separate me as a friend and me as an employee. We need to fix our friendship first,” you double down.
“I don’t understand, is everything okay?” Logan asks, his concern feels like a stab in the heart.
“I- I just need some space to focus on me. I love you, Lo, you are my best friend, but I can’t be your friend like that and also your employee. It doesn’t work well for us,” you say, lying about why. You just can’t stand to watch him take a new girl home every race weekend, and you need to crush your crush. You can’t keep wondering what would happen if he chose you.
So you do just that, in the next few months you sell your Miami apartment and move to a small beach town in New England. You and Logan are still close, but everything is different now.
Aside from the occasional paddock appearance with him or Oscar, you focused on yourself. You stood at his side while he married an influencer, you helped babysit when he had kids. You floated in his orbit, a close friend but no longer his best friend. Logan and Oscar stood by your side when you got married to the same guy you went on the date with before you left Miami.
The only thing that would’ve stopped you from getting married would be Logan’s intervention. He would object, saying he always loved you, and that he will always wonder what would have happened if you had dated. Little did you know, that the only thing stopping him from doing just that was the gold band on his ring finger and the kids sitting beside his wife.
Even now, as you lay in bed beside your husband, you can’t help but wonder what if.
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sabersandsnipers · 10 months
Text
A Trap Lies Ahead
Request:
How would romanced Astarion react to Tav (probably a bard Tav) offering to use themself as bait to lure out one of Astarion's sibling vampire spawn? Like, instead of just running into Dal and Petras, Tav preforms at where Astarion says are frequent haunts of his siblings, with Tav basically making themself seem like an easy target. Just an idea for a scenario.
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You stare at your reflection in the standing mirror. Astarion flits around you, a tape measure hanging around his neck. His actions are precise and practiced, and you notice the focus in his gaze. 
His confidence does nothing to cure your nerves, though. After brainstorming for hours on how to lure one of his fellow spawn in for questioning, you didn’t think offering yourself as bait would be something to consider. You were even more surprised that Astarion even agreed it. But he’s determined to corner another vampire and get answers. 
Astarion lines the tape up with one of your arms, and you shiver as his fingertips brush against your skin. His gaze meets yours briefly. He studies you for a moment, and you hope he doesn’t notice the fear crawling within you. 
But centuries of studying people has made him an expert at reading expressions. He lets his touch linger on your skin a moment longer, a small gesture of comfort. You know he senses the worry in you. 
A few minutes later he pauses in front of you. You glance down at him from the pedestal he put you on.
“I have all the measurements I need,” he tells you. He plays with the measuring tape in his hands. “I’ll get to work on the dress.” 
His eyes flit around nervously, and he’s unable to meet your gaze. Your hands have started shaking at the thought of baring yourself to the danger ahead, and you know anxiety has started to grip him as well. You tilt his chin up, forcing him to look at you. 
“We’ll get through this,” you say, as much to yourself as to him. 
He sighs, but his stance remains tense. He steps forward a bit and buries his face in your chest, inhaling your scent. You lace your fingers in his curls and press a kiss to top of his head. 
“I’m sorry I’m putting you through this,” he says. Your heart clenches at the hurt in his voice. This is as much torture for him as it is for you. 
You cradle his face in your hands, stroking your thumb along his cheekbone. His eyelids flutter closed at the sensation. 
“I trust you, Astarion. And we have to do something. We can’t just wait for them to come to us,” you tell him, hoping your words will ease some of his guilt. 
He grabs your hand and places a kiss on your palm. His eyes meet yours, a new determination settling within them. 
“I will be close by, love,” he says. “I won’t let anything happen to you.” 
A smile pulls at your lips, and your body warms at his protectiveness. “I know. I just worry you might do your job too well with how that dress is gonna look,” you joke. 
He lets out a breathy laugh. “I will admit you’re going to have to look irresistible, but you don’t even need a dress to do that in my opinion.” 
Your cheeks flush with heat. “As long as you’re the only one that  gets to touch me by the time the night’s over.” 
His hands grip your hips and lift you up to place you before him. His gaze now looks down on you, but the way he looks at you doesn’t make you feel smaller. 
“If they lay a hand on you, they will know a different fear by the time I’m done with them.” His words are hard but his expression is soft. You can’t help the shiver of excitement that runs through you at his promise. 
His hand slides to the back of your neck, pulling your forehead against his. You let out a breath at his proximity, savoring the way his thumb strokes the sensitive skin on your neck. The stress that had gripped you so tightly before has vanished with Astarion’s words. 
And you can’t help but feel sorry for any enemy that has the guts to touch Astarion’s mate.
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gomu-fer · 4 months
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Enough
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Zoro x reader
Hurt/comfort + gn reader
1k words, very self indulgent
Masterlist
“FUCK” you scream in annoyance tossing your weapon across the room, plomping down with your hands shielding your face as you pant from exhaustion, frustration aching at every bone
The last few week’s training had become more of a chore, scratch that, an inconvenience. Your mind seemed to be wondering elsewhere, anywhere but where your feet stand making you fail over and over again, not landing a single hit for hours on end. You had tried everything, taking it slow, harsh, even bribing yourself saying ‘If I land this hit I’ll buy me something nice’ just to end up in disappointment
Having no results at something you’ve been great at for years and years, that had gotten you the place at your captains crew was like a dagger digging into your skin, as another day passed where you couldn’t even get through the first exercise in your routine.
The sound of slow and steady footsteps met your ears making you shield yourself further, hiding your face in the corner of the room fighting the tears that threatened to flow
“You ok?” Zoros low and raspy voice calls for you, his tone monotone
You don’t even spare him a glance before you let out a heavy sigh “Clearly not”
Everyone in the ship had noticed your drastic shift in behavior. Every time you’d come down from the crows nest, your face was bright red, feet stumping as you smashed the door of your quarters shut, not talking to anyone for at least an hour
Zoro knew exactly what it was as he had witnessed your frustration while he shared the training room form time to time. You would grunt and stomp your feet like a child, telling yourself everything from words of encouragement to degrading venomous things as you tried and tried to get at least one hit.
But he never said a thing
Until you stopped coming down for dinners, sleeping in more and more often, spending your days rotting, nor a smile or a laugh leaving your mouth. That natural glow and silly sweet personality you carried slowly fading away as the days passed, and he couldn’t have that
The swordsman sat down at your side, arms crossed across his wide chest while his mind reeled. Zoro clearly was not on his element, he had searched of the right words to say, the right timing, but he quickly came to the realization that there’s no such thing, he just had to be blunt
“Stop beating yourself up” to his surprise you shake your head frantically, there goes his words of encouragement
“I am just trying to be useful for the crew, if I can’t be that might as well throw me out in the ocean” your words linger in the air, making Zoro frown and stabbing your own heart
“Is this what everything’s about?” You sit right up and stare back at him confused, he looks annoyed
“What?”
“You’re beating yourself up because you don’t feel useful?”
Zoro waches the rapid speed in which your chest rises and falls, your lungs fighting to find the air they so much need, teardrops falling in your cheeks
“I-“ you choke out, your voice betraying you but your eyes fixated on the swordsman, a quiet call for help but he waits, clinging at your every word
“I am not as strong as you Zoro, or as smart as Robin, as entertaining as Brook and Ussop, or as caring as Sanji and Chopper, as important as Franky and Nami… I always give my 200% so that I fulfill my role but sometimes, sometimes I can’t even get to 50%” your hands are quick to wash your salty tears away, embarrassed by how vulnerable you had allowed yourself to be, but if you were to keep your feelings inside any longer you were going to fall apart
“You are our crew mate”- Zoro spoke with his usual standoffish tone, yet it sounded more soft and reassuring as other times you had conversed.- “You are not some clown or some soldier, you’re here because Luffy saw something in you, he believed in you as we all do here, you don’t have to prove yourself” your head started to shake once more but Zoro was quick to shut down your insecurities, one of his hands holding your forearm giving it a light squeeze
“You’re enough” his words got stuck in your heart, warming it and finally releasing the dreadful thoughts that had been plaguing you for days
You break down crying, head falling on his sculptured chest holding onto the swordsman like your lifeline “I am so tired”- you whispered between sobs. Zoro was taken aback but didn’t tried to pull away, instead holding your frame close, hands drawing soothing circles in your back as you let go finally. And there he sat, wetting his shirt with your tears but he didn’t cared, being strong all the time could be tiring he knows this better than anyone, as well as how you had to always show up and be strong to protect yourself
But now he was here to do so
Your sobs died down as your breath aligned to the beating of his heart thrumming in your ears, you thank him, eyes glittering back at his gaze that seemed to have softened, he brushes the matter off but Zoro is more than happy to had been of service, lifting the heavy burden from your back
“Now, go rest” and for the first time in weeks, you smile
That smile he had so missed making his heart jump and skip several beats, a warm feeling spreading all over his being, and glad you’re back to yourself just as he wanted. It may sound selfish but he doesn’t care, he wants you back
“You’re far more emotionally intelligent than people give you credit for mosshead” he rolls his eyes trying to hide his swelling pride
“I am just that great” you nudge him before standing up making your way out, his eyes never leaving you as if preoccupied something would bother you again in his absence
As you slip to sleep that night, you can finally truly rest, your body letting go of the tension that had build up, worries washing away like the tides crashing against the ship, the moonlight and the sound of the ocean lulling you to have the best sleep of your life
All thanks to your swordsman
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𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐋𝐢𝐞 𝐖𝐞 𝐋𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐈𝐈 [𝐀𝐥𝐜𝐢𝐧𝐚 𝐃. 𝐱 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫]
❀ summary: You’ve fallen hard for Alcina Dimitrescu, the alluring CEO of a rival company—completely unaware of her plan to use you to gather information on your father’s business. What began as manipulation slowly turned into love, but when the truth comes out, will Alcina be able to win you back, or is it already too late?
❥ here's part 2, not proofread as always and idunno about this one but enjoy darlings<3 bye<3
❥ part one
The weeks after your discovery of Alcina’s betrayal had been a blur of anger and heartbreak. You’d thrown yourself into your work, your life—anything to keep from thinking about her. But no matter how hard you tried, thoughts of her lingered in the back of your mind. You could still feel her touch, hear her voice in your quiet moments, see her haunted expression when you left that night.
It didn’t help that you’d avoided all the usual places she might frequent, keeping yourself carefully away from any events or venues where you might run into her. Tonight, though, you didn’t have a choice. The charity gala your father was hosting was a major event in your family’s circle—there was no skipping it, no matter how much you wished to.
You took a deep breath as you stepped into the grand ballroom, the murmur of conversations and the clinking of glasses filling the air. The chandelier lights cast a warm glow over the room, making everything seem almost dreamlike. You smoothed down your dress and tried to focus on anything other than the possibility of seeing her.
But you didn’t have to wait long.
From across the room, you felt it—the weight of her gaze. Alcina Dimitrescu, standing tall and imposing, dressed in an elegant black gown that clung to her every curve. Her eyes were locked on you, and you could feel it in the pit of your stomach, that familiar pull you’d fought so hard to forget.
You tried to ignore it, tried to lose yourself in polite conversation with some of your father’s colleagues, but Alcina’s presence was undeniable. Every time you glanced her way, she was already watching you, her expression a mix of longing and regret.
Eventually, it became too much. The air in the room felt too thick, too stifling, and you excused yourself, making a beeline for the bathroom to catch your breath.
Once inside, you leaned against the sink, gripping the counter tightly as you tried to steady your racing heart. You hadn’t spoken to her since that night. You hadn’t given her a chance to explain herself, to make amends, because you weren’t sure you wanted to hear what she had to say.
The door creaked open behind you, and before you could even turn, you felt her presence—the soft click of her heels against the marble floor, the way the air shifted as she came closer. You stared at your reflection, seeing her towering figure behind you, her golden eyes locked onto yours in the mirror.
“Please,” she whispered, her voice soft, desperate. “Just hear me out.”
Your heart raced, but you didn’t move, didn’t turn to face her. “Alcina, I don’t want to do this.”
But instead of speaking, she closed the distance between you in an instant, wrapping her arms around your waist from behind. Her touch was gentle, almost hesitant, as if she were afraid you’d pull away. You stiffened at first, your breath catching in your throat, but she didn’t let go.
Her head lowered until her lips were near your ear, her breath warm against your skin. “I’m so sorry,” she whispered, her voice trembling. “I know I hurt you. I know I don’t deserve to ask for forgiveness, but I can’t let you go without trying.”
You stared at your reflection, feeling the heat of her body pressed against yours, the way her arms held you so tightly. You’d dreamed of this moment for weeks—of seeing her again, of feeling her close to you. But not like this. Not with so much pain between you.
“You used me, Alcina,” you said quietly, your voice barely above a whisper. “You lied to me.”
“I know,” she breathed, her voice cracking. “I know I did. But what I feel for you now... it’s real. It was never supposed to happen. I was never supposed to fall in love with you, but I did. And I hate myself for hurting you like this.”
Her arms tightened around you as if she feared you might slip away, her cheek resting against your hair. “I’ve never felt this way before, not with anyone. I’ve never let anyone in like I did with you, and I ruined it. I ruined us.”
You felt a lump forming in your throat, tears burning behind your eyes. Part of you wanted to push her away, to tell her that you didn’t care anymore, that it was too late. But the way she held you, the way her voice shook with sincerity—it was hard to ignore.
“I thought I meant something to you,” you whispered, the hurt clear in your voice. “But it was all just a game.”
Alcina shook her head against you, her grip on you unwavering. “It started that way, but it changed. You changed me. Please, believe me. I never wanted to hurt you like this.”
You were silent for a moment, your mind torn between the betrayal and the love that still lingered in your heart. Her arms around you felt safe, familiar, but the weight of what she’d done was still too heavy to ignore.
“I don’t know if I can trust you again,” you admitted, your voice barely audible.
Alcina let out a shaky breath, her lips brushing the top of your head. “I understand. But I’ll spend the rest of my life trying to earn your trust back, if you’ll let me.”
You closed your eyes, feeling the tears slip down your cheeks as you leaned back into her. It was all too much—the anger, the longing, the love you still felt for her despite everything.
“I don’t know what to do,” you whispered, your voice breaking.
Alcina’s arms tightened around you, and for the first time in weeks, you let yourself sink into the feeling of being held by her. “Then just let me hold you,” she whispered back. “For now, that’s all I ask.”
You stood there in the quiet of the bathroom, wrapped in her arms, the weight of the past hanging between you. There was so much still unsaid, so many wounds left to heal. But for now, in this moment, you let her hold you, let her be close again, and for a fleeting second, it felt like maybe—just maybe—things could be okay again.
In the weeks following your discovery of Alcina's betrayal, it felt like you were drowning in a sea of conflicting emotions. Anger, heartbreak, and confusion fought for dominance, while you buried yourself in work to keep from thinking about her. Yet no matter how hard you tried, memories of her touch, her voice, and her regretful expression from that night haunted you.
You did everything to avoid her, even going so far as to skip any social functions or venues she might frequent. But that didn’t stop her from trying to contact you. At first, it was the flowers—extravagant bouquets delivered to your home. Each came with a handwritten note from Alcina, her usually elegant script slightly smudged, as if written in haste or distress.
“I’m sorry. Please let me explain.”
“You mean everything to me. Please talk to me.”
“I was wrong. Let me make it right.”
You tossed every note aside without reading more than the first few words, each one feeling like a punch to the gut. As the days went by, her attempts grew more persistent. She sent letters, each one more heartfelt than the last, pleading for a chance to talk, to make things right. Yet you couldn’t bring yourself to respond. It hurt too much.
Then came the late-night phone calls. You would let it ring, staring at her name lighting up your screen, debating whether or not to answer. But you never did. Eventually, the calls stopped, leaving only an aching silence behind.
And tonight, at your father’s charity gala, it seemed fate had a cruel sense of timing. You didn’t have a choice but to attend, despite knowing there was a high chance Alcina would be there. The grand ballroom buzzed with chatter, the clinking of glasses blending with soft music. You were surrounded by people, yet you felt utterly alone.
You’d barely stepped into the room when you felt her presence before you even saw her. Across the sea of well-dressed guests, Alcina stood out like a dark flame in her black gown. Her tall, commanding figure drew eyes, but it was her unwavering gaze locked onto you that made your stomach twist.
Despite the distance, her emotions were clear. Longing, regret, desperation. The sight of her stirred something in you, a mix of pain and desire you had tried so hard to bury. But you refused to let her get to you. Not here. Not now.
Throughout the night, you tried to lose yourself in conversations, mingling with people you barely knew or cared about. But Alcina’s gaze followed you, her presence looming even from across the room. Several times, you caught her trying to approach, weaving through the crowd toward you, only to be intercepted by someone who wanted her attention—business partners, acquaintances, socialites. You could see her growing more frustrated with each interruption.
And yet, part of you was relieved every time someone blocked her path. You weren’t ready to face her. Not yet.
But Alcina was nothing if not persistent.
The night wore on, and just as you thought you might escape without confrontation, she managed to close the distance. You were slipping away to the restroom for a moment of quiet when you felt her presence behind you. The door clicked shut softly, and you turned to see her standing there, looking as regal and vulnerable as ever.
“Please,” she whispered, her voice soft, desperate. “Just hear me out.”
Your heart raced, but you didn’t move, didn’t turn to face her. “Alcina, I don’t want to do this.”
But instead of speaking, she closed the distance between you in an instant, wrapping her arms around your waist from behind. Her touch was gentle, almost hesitant, as if she were afraid you’d pull away. You stiffened at first, your breath catching in your throat, but she didn’t let go.
Her head lowered until her lips were near your ear, her breath warm against your skin. “I’m so sorry,” she whispered, her voice trembling. “I know I hurt you. I know I don’t deserve to ask for forgiveness, but I can’t let you go without trying.”
You stared at your reflection, feeling the heat of her body pressed against yours, the way her arms held you so tightly. You’d dreamed of this moment for weeks—of seeing her again, of feeling her close to you. But not like this. Not with so much pain between you.
“You used me, Alcina,” you said quietly, your voice barely above a whisper. “You lied to me.”
“I know,” she breathed, her voice cracking. “I know I did. But what I feel for you now... it’s real. It was never supposed to happen. I was never supposed to fall in love with you, but I did. And I hate myself for hurting you like this.”
Her arms tightened around you as if she feared you might slip away, her cheek resting against your hair. “I’ve never felt this way before, not with anyone. I’ve never let anyone in like I did with you, and I ruined it. I ruined us.”
You felt a lump forming in your throat, tears burning behind your eyes. Part of you wanted to push her away, to tell her that you didn’t care anymore, that it was too late. But the way she held you, the way her voice shook with sincerity—it was hard to ignore.
“I thought I meant something to you,” you whispered, the hurt clear in your voice. “But it was all just a game.”
Alcina shook her head against you, her grip on you unwavering. “It started that way, but it changed. You changed me. Please, believe me. I never wanted to hurt you like this.”
You were silent for a moment, your mind torn between the betrayal and the love that still lingered in your heart. Her arms around you felt safe, familiar, but the weight of what she’d done was still too heavy to ignore.
“I don’t know if I can trust you again,” you admitted, your voice barely audible.
Alcina let out a shaky breath, her lips brushing the top of your head. “I understand. But I’ll spend the rest of my life trying to earn your trust back, if you’ll let me.”
You closed your eyes, feeling the tears slip down your cheeks as you leaned back into her. It was all too much—the anger, the longing, the love you still felt for her despite everything.
“I don’t know what to do,” you whispered, your voice breaking.
Alcina’s arms tightened around you, and for the first time in weeks, you let yourself sink into the feeling of being held by her. “Then just let me hold you,” she whispered back. “For now, that’s all I ask.”
You stood there in the quiet of the bathroom, wrapped in her arms, the weight of the past hanging between you. There was so much still unsaid, so many wounds left to heal. But for now, in this moment, you let her hold you, let her be close again, and for a fleeting second, it felt like maybe—just maybe—things could be okay again.
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❥ definitely not obsessed with Alcina begging to take her back- oop who said that?🤨👀
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authorred · 9 days
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Die With A Smile | Li Shen/Zayne x gn!Reader | Love and Deepspace
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➺ Preface: After a particularly bad run-in with a wanderer, you're left essentially dying on site. You know this will not bode over well for a certain doctor-friend of yours, so you force yourself up and onwards. Both you and Zayne have to reconcile the fact that you almost died without seeing each other for almost a month.
➺ I know I already posted a song-fic for this song but goddammit I keep seeing edits for this shit on my fyp and I love this song so mf much that I can't myself ( I also have an unhealthy obsession with Zayne ).
Maybe I'll do a Sylus version??? However the hell I'll do that.
→ Song
Warning(s): Mentions of extensive wounds, blood
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Oh god, Zayne is going to kill me.
Your skin is warm and sticky; a disconcerting feeling. What remains of your clothes is glued to your skin in blood and sweat, most of it yours. You don't know why, but for some reason, Wanderers love to dick with you as if you're a hot commodity. You were just trying to do your job as a Deepspace Hunter, which you succeeded at technically, but, now your injuries are catching up to you.
You're starting to feel lightheaded and stumbling on your feet. You don't know if you've broken any bones, but all you know is that every part of your body hurts and trying to blink takes all of your energy.
Goddammit, if Zayne sees me he's going to be so mad. Or sad. Or both. I didn't even text him today--I should've texted him.
You stumble from the remains of where the protocore field emerged. You can feel the warmth of your blood spilling down your leg and flooding your boots. It’s an absolutely unnerving sensation. You have to find a way to the hospital. You need to get help. You can’t die. Not like this. Not before you see Zayne.
~
You were going to kill him. No, not kill, perhaps that’s too far. But you were going to scold him, chastise him like a worried mother. Zayne has been pushing himself again, not taking breaks or sleeping for more than five hours. He’s been using the on-call rooms in Akso or sleeping in his office. He doesn’t know why he does this. Perhaps he’s stressed because you haven’t texted him in several days and he’s unknowing to your severe injuries. It’s a way to cope. Because if he didn’t, he’d go mad.
So why.
Why?
Why is he staring at several paramedics rolling you into the hospital, covered in blood and unconscious? Is that what you’ve been doing all this time? Being reckless? Risking your life? Again?
He stands there, rooted to the linoleum, watching you be rolled into the OR for emergency surgery. He doesn’t know what’s wrong—eyeballing it he could tell you��re suffering from many lacerations. But what if there’s more? What if your heart is giving out?
It’s not until the hospital begins to settle again that he’s able to move. Swallowing thickly and moving like a ghost back to where he’s needed.
~
Hours pass—two hours, specifically. Zayne stands in your hospital room staring at your sleeping figure. Covered in bandages and bruises alike, his eyes are filled with trepidation belying fear and concern. The pain you must’ve went through to trek all the way to Akso Hospital—the amount of blood you lost. Too stubborn for your own good. He can’t linger, he has other duties to attend to. But he wants to—gods, he wants to.
Stepping up to the side of your bed, his hand reaches out. His fingertips brush against the palm of your hand, gently trailing them up your wrist and arm. Featherlight touches to prove you’re here, alive, breathing. His virescent eyes comb up and down your body. “How reckless,” he whispers. “And here I thought you were simply lost with no reception.”
No response, as he expected.
With a soft, almost imperceptible sigh, Zayne retracts his hand and places it back in his coat pocket. With one last lingering look, he turns and walks away from your hospital bed. He has work to finish, and you’re stabilized and alive. At least he’s assured in that regard. He can go on with the rest of his day without that aching, gnawing anxiety in his chest. It’s a relief, really.
~
When you wake up, you have no idea where you are at first. You’re completely disoriented and lost. You vaguely remember trying to navigate your way through a town on the outskirts of Linkon, and then after that, the memories are fuzzy.
You look to your side, your vision severely blurred. You can see a person sitting in the chair next to your bed, resting. You recognize the shape of their body immediately. “Zayne?” Comes your hoarse, weak voice. Even that’s enough to rouse him from his sleep—or maybe he wasn’t even fully asleep in the first place.
Zayne sits up straight when he sees you’re awake before standing. “Y/n,” he says, almost in surprise. “You’re awake. With the amount of sedatives in your body, you should still be asleep.”
“I can’t move my body,” you chuckle softly, but it sounds like a sad whimper instead. “Maybe that’s where they went. . .”
Zayne sighs at your attempt of jokes in your state. “Should I ask what happened this time?”
“I think you know.”
Zayne gazes down at you, his eyes slightly narrowed in worry. “You’re too reckless. Please, put some value on your life before we’re unable to fix you.”
“I know,” you reply softly. “But you don’t seem the best either. I can still see those dark circles even through my fucked up vision. You’ve been overworking again, haven’t you?”
Zayne shifts like a kid getting caught before looking away, “I take naps during the day so I can be productive at night. And I’ve been eating well and hydrating. Truly, it’s not that bad.”
“Those dark circles say otherwise.”
A moment passes before Zayne looks at you again. “You were too close this time,” he says. “Your life was in a precarious position. You’re lucky we had the personnel available.”
“I know,” you repeat. “I know. I—I’ll be honest, I didn’t think. . . I didn’t think I’d make it.”
Zayne’s expression drops suddenly, but he lets you talk.
“All I remember thinking is that I needed to get to a hospital, to get help, because if I didn’t, I’d regret it. Regret not texting you, seeing you. I wanted to see you one more time, at least.”
Zayne’s face twitches, and he resists the urge to reach out and touch you. You need space. Your body needs time to heal. “I see,” he replies softly. “Is that what gave you strength to crawl to the doors of the hospital?”
“Yes,” you nod softly. “At least, if I died here, I’d be near you. And that’s enough for me.”
Zayne doesn’t say anything immediately. “I would be. . . in pain if you died,” he says quietly, doing best to articulate his feelings without coming off as too much. “I would miss you greatly. Agonizingly.”
“Tomorrow is never promised,” you say, gazing at him with such affection and favor he feels lightheaded from holding your gaze. “But if I die—if I die next to you, with you. . . I wouldn’t change a thing. I would die happy and content. Knowing you’re there.”
Zayne swallows, his Adam’s Apple bobbing up and down under his black dress shirt. “I believe it would be best if we promised each other. . . to not push ourselves too far.”
You chuckle softly, “Maybe. But whatever the case, I’m just happy you’re here.”
You add, “And when the day comes I do die, I’ll gladly die with a smile if you’re with me.”
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