#so maybe that’s just the way art criticism is done ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[lazzarella]

Oh, I started a very similar post recently but couldn't be bothered posting it. (Read: was too chicken)

“it’s important to be critical of the media we consume” doesn’t mean I have to do so in a public forum

This! This is exactly why I often have a kneejerk "NO!" response when I see 'we have to be critical of the media we consume' because SO many people I've seen express that sentiment mean we have to do it in the public eye (and not an insignificant number of them want you to be critical in the same way they are, and if you're not then it doesn't seem to count) and preface any praise of media with a long disclaimer on its flaws. And it's not everyone, but it's enough people that I'm leery of posts like that now. I just have zero interest in always having to list every single flaw before I can dig into what I like!

Anyway, I personally try to meet media on its own terms, these days, as in I prefer to look at what it's trying to do, instead of what I think it *should* do, and I'm able to enjoy a lot more things that way! Sometimes I don't think it's successful, and sometimes I end up realising it's just not for me. And I'm also trying to keep in mind that a LOT of media critique comes down to subjective preference. Pls, I could very easily tear even some things I love to shreds, and while it can be fun while I’m yelling at my television, I personally find it more gratifying and challenging to dig into what’s working and why, I guess?

It's certainly interesting to read other people's thoughts on different shows and movies and books, but yeah, I follow people on Letterboxd and Goodreads and see people in the tags here who never seem to enjoy anything! I'm sure they do, but their reviews are always heavily skewed toward negative criticism and it must be exhausting. It seems exhausting to me, anyway!

There are so many ways to engage with art and media and focussing on the positives does not display a lack of intellectual curiosity imho

(Sorry, I don’t usually add anything to posts, but this has been on my mind a lot lately)

The thing is, I do have negative thoughts and criticisms of the things that I watch or read, but I don’t often feel compelled to share them, and I don’t think this makes me intellectually inferior or vapid.

I think it’s quite easy, in fact, to recognize the flaws in a piece of media. And I don’t owe it to the public or to strangers to make sure that they know that I know that something that happened in a show was poorly executed or that an actor had weak delivery.

If I really feel like talking about something I disliked, then I will, but “it’s important to be critical of the media we consume” doesn’t mean I have to do so in a public forum, and I don’t get why some people act like doing so makes them smarter than the rest of fandom. Frankly, I think what bothers me more than the negativity is the pretentiousness around it.

[essentiallychaotic]

Someone asked about my hand tattoo and we had a quick lil convo about painful spots and she mentioned her knuckles were a bitch. To which I said “oh yeah, if I get my knuckles done I think I’ll definitely be using numbing cream on them” and she was like “what? No ya gotta feel the full experience in my opinion” and I’m sat here thinking about that and like, honestly what an odd way to feel about pain.

Like I didn’t use numbing cream for my hand tattoo, mostly because I couldn’t be bothered. I was getting a tattoo with someone else, I was the second tattoo, so I’d’ve had to apply it in shop and didn’t want to deal with it ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ simple as that

I know so many people who compare how painful their tattoos were and how “well” they dealt with it, like not numbing your skin before purposefully creating an ink filled wound with tiny needles is a badge of honour, or a measurement of how tough someone is. I’ve had people openly judge me in their pain measuring contest because I readily stated I used numbing cream on a tattoo because 2.5hrs in to a 3hr full colour realistic rose and banner my artist needed a break and I knew after a 15min pause my skin would feel on fire without the cream. This tattoo takes up most of my forearm, it is not small, and my forearm tattoos all hurt like hell. It’s one of my ouch zones ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I see no shame in not creating more suffering for myself. And, to potentially run counter to the point of this post, as sometimes the multitudes of one’s self contradict, listening to someone judge me for using a cream while knowing I sit better than most people do because tattoo pain just doesn’t bother me feels like listening to the teacher in charlie brown. Every time a man talks about “powering through” i just hear wah wah wah wah wah sounds

I guess the main reason I’m mystified by the obsession with pain as a central aspect of the experience is the linking of suffering and strength, or suffering and commitment. Like I’ve spent over 2,000$ in ink, that’s a good enough sign of commitment in my mind. I don’t need to suffer to demonstrate my commitment to my body art, I just need money and an artist I like, the pain is simply an aspect of the process. Also suffering is just never an indicator of strength. I’m not stronger because I find filler tattoo needles to be a soothing burn feeling, I’m just weird.

I do also recognise that my relationship with pain is slightly warped because I experience chronic pain. Pain isn’t an obstacle to overcome for me, it’s fucking boring. And maybe that’s the critical difference, if pain hangs out with you every day, then “overcoming” it isn’t all that special. And at least with tattoo pain I get a cool picture

[thechekhov]

So, today I was drawing in class, a few other kids know I sketch in class. One person walked up to me while I was sketching a dragon and said, "I went through that phase at one point. " I've been drawing dragons for over ten years now. When will me 'dragon phase' end?

Why should it? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

The truth is, there is nothing wrong with ‘phases’. Phases are just time-periods where you have a concentrated interest in one thing. That’s not something bad. That’s just NORMAL. You’re aLWAYS gonna be in a phase. Sometimes, a phase will only last a week and then you’ll exhaust your interest and move on. Sometimes you’ll be in a phase for years. Some people are in phases that last an entire lifetime.

You know who else had a dragon phase? A WHOLE SHIT TON OF COOL ARTISTS. 

For example, Alan Lee who painted Smaug, arguably one of the most famous dragons of all time!

Fuckin’  Raphael

Ciruelo Cabral, an Argentine painter

Fantasy painting by John Howe

AND A WHOLE LOAD OF OTHERS!!!

Some people make entire CAREERS out of their phases. Drawing dragons is definitely one of those phases that is relatively common - dragons are cool! People have been drawing dragons for MILLENIA. Dragons are like, one of the most common themes in art in general!

What’s wrong with having a dragon phase? Why SHOULD it end? 

You like drawing something - DRAW IT!!!

What this person is doing is using you as an ego step-ladder. By placing your interests into a box called ‘a phase’ they are saying ‘you are doing something that I already did, therefore I am above you’ and stepping on you in order to make themselves feel better for having ‘already done that’.

Fuck that! You have something you like to draw, you draw it! End of story. EVERY artist is in a phase of some sort at ALL TIMES. Some of these phases just end up raking up a bad reputation because humans are social creatures and it’s way easier to bully someone than to critically think about why we consider, for example, the ‘anime phase’ to be such a bad thing when it is, in fact, just a period in someone’s life where they are imitating a style they happen to enjoy. 

This has been happening SINCE THE BEGINNING OF TIME. Since the beginning of artists, really. We all draw inspiration from different subject matters, different stylizations, different drawing techniques. None of it is inherently superior. 

Honestly, dragons are cool. I want to draw more dragons. Maybe I need to have a dragon phase.

[musicfren]

to be heard

There are so many hopes that exist in one heart, so many expectations that pull them apart, so many people they’re desperate to be, so many voices they’ll never flee. They’re shrouded in secrets they can’t quite explain, but if there’s a person where they can abstain, avoid the disdain, inane, insane, and find a way to be human again, then they’ll take it with both hands outstretched, and hold on before they find themselves wrecked.

We really were gonna not to a colab this time! We weren’t! Oops  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ This is a companion piece with to be seen, for which @nottesilhouette wrote far too many words for and I am so so sorry. Also she’s amazing and I love her <3 Happy @felinettenovember y’all!

Showcase night is finally here. Felix’s fingers dig into the strings of his exorbitantly expensive violin like a drowning man grasping at shore. He is prepared of course; he’s done scarcely anything else for the last month. He knows every twist, every wrinkle, every potential hiccup of his piece, and has ironed it all so flat it barely has any texture at all. There is nothing left to criticize, which is precisely as it should be. Maybe this one will be good enough.

Felix’s parents will hear about his project for the first time tonight, maybe think about it at all for the first time. That’s how they tend to approach his projects, from behind a well-stocked fortress of disregard. They can always pay the attention back afterwards, if it turned out to be worthwhile. Given such a small window to make an impression, he damned well better make sure it’s good. He wants a return on his investment, just this once. 

As he steps out onto the stage, into the burning, blinding heat of the spotlight, Felix gives himself ten whole seconds to panic. He is allowed this much at least, in the few moments left before the doors open and the showcase begins. He stares blankly out at his classmates --amatures all-- who have already set up at their stations, gluing the last foil stars onto their posters or whatever it is they’re doing. His white-knuckled fingers, almost translucent in the harsh glare, clutch his instrument so tight it might snap. He will be better than them. He will stand out. 

When those doors open and they see him for the first time, everything will be perfect, calm, effortless. It will all pretend, of course, but that’s for the best. No one needs to bother with his real, trembling self.

Then the parents flood into the room, and chaos ensues. 

The showcase passes in a blur as he waits for his turn on stage. Everything is irrelevant noise, everything is distracting. He tries desperately to keep his focus but he can’t help staring at the girl, Marinette, presenting with a veritable seraglio of models and mannequins standing behind her in silent support. She seems so sure of herself, so unconcerned by the dozens of hungry eyes on her. Well, if a second-rate like her can pull it off, maybe he can as well.

And then all at once it’s his turn. He hopes these notes won’t flow from his fingers like ketchup from a bottle: awkwardly and in sudden spurts, making a big mess and staining his clothes with blood and shame. 

It goes so much worse than he expected. He is nanoseconds too late on his transitions, millimeters imprecise in his fingering. Once, he almost plays an emotion. 

When it’s done, he doesn’t even wait for the applause, just turns to his right and strides off stage. He needs to find his parents.

“Oh, we could hear it well enough from over here,” says his father, who has spent the entire performance by the snack table.

“I wrote this piece specifically for you. I thought you’d... appreciate it. I was hoping you’d get to hear it tonight.” 

“Oh, how lovely.” His father takes another sip of his martini. Felix shuffles uncomfortably before him. His mother offers a wan, thin-lipped grin. 

“What did you… think of it?”

“Well, it was certainly very clear it was written by you.” For a moment, Felix is hopeful-- did they understand it? Has he finally managed to be heard, under all of the pretense? Have they managed to care? “The... childlike quality of the melody was very prevalent, but you played it rather stiff.” Another careless sip. 

His mother cuts in. “I’ve never been a big fan of that trill thing you do, it always feels so pretentious. Still, I suppose it marks your… creation… as your own, so that’s quite the effect, certainly.”

His fingers are white on the strings and his teeth are slowly grinding themselves into a fine powder. At long last he chokes out a reply.

“Th… thank you for your feedback.” 

His father munches on an olive. “Glad we could help.”

He makes his exit before his façade can crack. The crowd of excited, babbling parents flows around him in a blur as he flees into the auditorium. He doesn’t know where he’s going but eventually the sound of the last presentation still going reaches his ears. He shoves through the throng and finds Marinette, as calm as before, still jabbering on to the sycophantic oohs and aahs of the crowd. As Felix listens, a thick sludge of resentment starts to fill up his stomach. Her presentation is talentless, amateur, and yet somehow she is loved and admired. As the final cycle ends, he strides forward.

“How quaint of you.” 

Marinette doesn’t bother to turn around. “Thank you. I liked yours a lot, Felix.” 

Felix’s fingers whiten further against the violin still gripped in his hand. Her words are dull, generic, pulled out of a convenient box of well-worn phrases. How like his parents. Well, here’s someone he can speak his mind to.

“No, you didn’t. You have no appreciation for true art. You think this is art? This is derivative. This is… this is nothing more than a false pretense of an understanding you don’t have in a failed effort to curry favor with someone who is never going to notice you.” 

Goodness, it feels good to say it. He stands there, breathing heavily in the ensuing silence. But then, she knocks him clean off his high horse.

“I liked the way your composition sounded in the rehearsal room.”

Felix’s already spinning world spins ever faster. “What.” 

“I’ve spent most of class time sitting outside the rehearsal room you always choose-- you’re very predictable, Felix-- and sketching there. That’s what my designs are based on: that mournful, hopeful, determined, resigned haunting tune that you practiced day by painstaking day. That’s how I imagine the heroes feel. I can understand how you’d know that. I do too.”  

He tries to argue, to push back against her words, but they have already sunk well past his mask. Yes, this has the ring of truth. Never in his life has Felt this understood. Why did it have to be by this girl, of all people?

“I wish you had played it like that today.” She says, and he finds he wishes that too.

She’s a lot like him, he thinks. All they ever wanted was to be known. Maybe they can do that for each other.

“I wish you would’ve worn these yourself.”

[johns-prince]

Thank you for bringing up the Yoko topic again. I don't hate her, just find it funny when people defend her doing such terrible things. It reads like, "10 reasons why Voldemort was a actually good guy." There are some aspects of her that I find intriguing as I would be intrigued by a villain, believe it or not I love villains, but when I called her a "tragic villain" (which meant I sympathized with her motives and circumstances) I received the same old "racist, mysogynistic" name calling again.

(this is a continuation of that ask) While I love John deeply, I accept the fact that John was a shitty human being multiple times in his life and spewed quite a lot of bullshit. If I were a Yoko fan I would have the same attitude. Like, she did such things, but I love her still, and I find her art wonderful. But no, it's always about blindly following her narrative, and name calling everyone who dares to criticize her.

-------------------------------------------

Hullo! Yes, I saw that post. Honestly you were quite civil, nice even, much nicer than I am about it. And I did see the backlash you received, which I'm sorry about. I don't think they get that sending us those kinds of asks, isn't going to really help change our minds, or keep people liking her if they can't even criticize her, point out things she's done, or even call her a "tragic villain" for deeper reasons that aren't even based in hate but wanting to understand and, hey, point out her complexity as a human being...

Oh yeah, John's not at all a saint. He's done some pretty horrible things, unforgivable in terms of how he also treated Julian. Inexcusable, and while we can maybe sympathize, understand, there's no real justification, in the end. I adore him, mainly because at least he was honest that he had problems, serious issues, a temper, and he at least tried apologizing/fixing it in his own way (key note, tried), and tried to get better (whether he did or not is debatable)

Yoko... Has not acknowledged any of what she's done, behaved like. No regrets, no remorse. Would I be more open to her if she did? Probably not, but I'd commend her for trying like John tried. For admitting she's done a lot of shady shit, unjustifiable shit. But no... It's all whitewashed, or excused.

And look, I once thought Yoko was neat. When I was young, she was really the only Beatle wife I knew, and I was like cool, she seems neat. I believed totally in their Legendary Love™ Hell I even tried getting into her music once.

And then I got older, and I got more involved in the Beatles, and I started doing more research. And when you learn more about John, you end up learning more about Paul and Yoko. The more I learned, and read, by those around them, around her... I just, I can't support that. I've had manipulative, controlling and abusive women like that in my family, caused a lot of anguish. My grandmother was like that. So, I just can't.

And that's just that. If you, you know the theoretical you, wants to be a fan of hers, of her work and what have you... Go ahead. Knock yourself out, free country dude.

But I just can't support it, or understand it really, and I can't support or like someone like that. Just how it is. Disliking her for her race, her sex, or for "breaking up" the Beatles (really that had more to do with whatever the Hell was going on between John and Paul but) are very stupid, stupid reasons to dislike her, especially when there's legit viable reasons to detest or not support her as a person.

But yes, I'm sorry even you've gotten the "You're just a bigot" treatment for, really not even doing anything wrong. Step out of line, don't blindly follow the narrative that she (and John) had, has carefully constructed and set up, and you'll be dragged through the mud.

I realize I've poked a wasps nest, and while I probably shouldn't have, I did. Worse then you did, I'm afraid ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[naia10101]

Tag people you want to get to know better

So i was tagged by @tolrais and I've never really done one of these before sooo figured I'd try it out!

Your name and what you would have named yourself: I actually really like my name ngl, but I don't particularly feel comfortable sharing it online so yall can stuck to Naia 😂

Astrological sign (sun/moon/rising): sun sagittarius, moon taurus and rising virgo. My main comment on this is that apparently rising virgo is what you try and present yourself as and i dont think anyone has every viewed me as organised 😂😂

When did you join tumblr and why: 2014, mostly cos I got sick of clicking on fanart from Google images and not being able to look at it without an account 😂

Top 5 fandoms: of all time would probably beeeee, general podcasts (since the Magnus Archives, the penumbra podcast, welcome to night vale and such are all kinda linked in the fandom), hannibal because I will never be over it :'), critical role cos I'm counting that as seperate to general podcast since I tend to watch it rather than listen, dungeons and dragons cos I think that counts as a fandom and probably steven universe because even though I don't really actively participate in the fandom anymore, it will always have a really special place in my heart with how it affected my development when I was growing up

Top 5 movies: first of all is definitely Saw, the first movie is amazing the other I don't mind but the first will always be my favourite. Next is prolly Scream cos all 3 of the original movies are absolute GOLD. Silence of the lambs, but only the first one cos I haven't actually seen the others and they don't sound as good ¯\_(ツ)_/¯. Avengers civil war, purely just cos of the people I watched it with and how special those memories are. Finally probably The Shining, again cos it was an amazing movie night.

Go to song when you want to Feel: anyone who knows me will judge so much cos I rarely listen to pop and this is cheesy af but Human by Christina Perri, and it only works if I'm already feeling a lot, it somehow just channels everything out my eyes :')

What's your religion or faith if you have one: I've always been pretty agnostic, but recently have found myself really drawn to different pagan-y, but that mostly manifests as talking to my pagan friends about it a lot and reading a lot about it

Do you have a type: uuuuuhhh I suppose anyone not particularly intimidating, I find a lot of things really pretty for different reasons, but I'm not a fan of really "scary" or overly "sexy" looks

What does your heart/soul yearn for: peace and equity

If you had to describe yourself in 5 words to someone you don't know: meaningless facts adhd excitement octopus

Favourite subjects in school: biology, chemistry music and drama

Top 5 fictional characters: Jonnathan Sims from the Magnus archives, Juno Steel from the penumbra podcast, caduceus clay from critical role, Burger Chainz from polygons cyberpunk red campaign and peridot from steven universe

Top 3 moments that made you ugly cry: THE ENDING OF FALSETTOS like bruh that's my go to when I need to cry cos EVERY TIME. Wei wuxians death scene on the cliff from the untamed cos OWCH. And the end of avengers endgame cos wow I have grown up with marvel since I was like 8.

The earth, the sun, the moon or the stars: the moon, cos earth SUCKS the sun is way too hot and bright and i love the stars but the moon is just so beautiful and is the symbol of a lot of ancient goddesses that I really identify with

Favourite kind of weather: heavy rain and overcast so I can curl up with a cup of tea and listen to emo music cos I will never escape being a shameless emo and also sunlight flares on my glasses so I hate it

Top 3 characters you kin: uuuuhhhhhhh no.

Favourite medium of art: idk if it's what I prefer to use or see? I prefer to draw on digital but I love seeing classical ink art from Asian cultures like China and Japan (I'm sorry I don't know what it's called 😬)

Introvert/ambivert/extrovert: extroverted introvert 😂 cos I need to talk to people I know well but I HATE talking to anyone not my friend and all interaction drains me to some degree

A favourite literary quote: "life is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing"

Some of your favourite books: Song of Achilles by madeline miller cos aaaaa, Dark matter by Michelle paver for the amazing horror descriptions and extra points for the surprise gay, anything by Edgar Allen poe or lovecraft, good omens by Terry pratchet and Neil gaimen and I must include the hunger games, because I reread those a hundred times as a teenager

If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be: I'm not massively picky about what I want but definitely some cottagecore vibes so probably somewhere in the countryside in southern France or maybe Italy

If you could live in any time in history when would it be: tbh i like WiFi and also being a big gay with mental illness I don't think I'd do well in any other time 😅 maybe would be born a few years earlier for when emo music was popular cos I missed that but that's it

If you could play any instrument masterfully what would it be: since I already play guitar and uke and stuff I'd love to be masterful at piano. I already play it somewhat but being truly masterful at it is one of the most incredible things I've seen

If you have one, what mythological gods/goddesses do you feel a connection to: definitely Artemis, dionysius, athena and hades, not particularly for spiritual reasons but their stories and characterisations speak to me a lot

And lastly, favourite recent selfie on your camera roll:

Apparently I gotta tag people now so uuuhhhh @enbeeees and @fluffyboissculptedboishissybois I'm curious what you guys would answer 😁😁

[dailydosemiku]

So I just beat Yume Nikki -Dream Diary- 100%

I’m gonna write this as an in depth review I guess. So I got done just recently discussing it with an old friend, the very same friend who roughly a decade ago showed me the original game. We have pretty polar opposite opinions of the game and I’m seeing that seems to be the trend with people who have played it so far. This isn’t a call out post or “Your opinion is wrong and mine is right” bullshit. I just want to explain why I liked it and maybe help some people see the game from a different light.

First things first. I want to premise, if this even gets read, that nothing will ever top or match Yume Nikki the RPG maker game that has gained a cult following. Even Yume Nikki on a second playthrough, will never feel like Yume Nikki on a persons first playthrough in my opinion, granted that is if they enjoyed it. Before this re-imagining came out there were mostly 2 kinds of people and barely anyone in between. People who loved it for it’s entire concept and execution and people who thought it was the most boring chore in the world. There is barely anyone I know or have met that’s in between those who are just like “yeah it’s ok I guess” Just because this re-imagining came out does not mean the original is now bad or doesn’t exist and I will respect your opinion if you think one is better then the other, because it’s an opinion, and they aren’t the same.

Below this is the Steam Store page, I want anyone reading this to read it and read it again.

“Yume Nikki has been hailed as one of the greatest (and most controversial) games ever created with RPG Maker. The new YUMENIKKI -DREAM DIARY- is not a remake, but a full reimagining of the original―reconstructed and enhanced using elements and styles of modern indie games. “

If you read this and thought this meant that this is going to be the same game, you went in with your expectations to high. One of the biggest reasons Yume Nikki was so beloved and how most people go into it was, THEY KNEW NOTHING, hell I knew nothing, I got like 2 sentences and like a 5 minute gameplay video of the game and that sold me. Then these people were to learn after diving into this strange game that only told you things with visuals, the creator disappears. For years even. So to do both games right I want to break them down into some basically game design elements to the best of my ability. Gameplay, Soundtrack, Story, Visuals, and Atmosphere/Presentation. Of course I’m going to reference both games because that’s what everyone else is doing for each of these.

Gameplay, well there really wasn’t much of a game to play in Yume Nikki the RPG maker game. I’m sorry I love Yume Nikki, but there’s not a lot of interactivity. It’s more of an experience, a long giant question of How and Why did this game get to this point? If you were at all like me, you kept playing to answer these questions and ultimately you either didn’t get an answer and were happy with it or you found your own answer, which if you ask me is part of the magic of that first playthrough. But as a 2D free RPG Maker game with no admission to entry, it was an experience and just that AN EXPERIENCE. As for Yume Nikki -Dream Diary- the 3D platformer, there’s actually a game to be played which understandable makes it very different then the RPG maker original. But this is an re-imagining, it’s not fair to directly compare the 2. They are in completely different medians and special in their own ways. In it’s essence, whether you agree or not both games at their element are about exploring an experience. If one having gameplay elements, that if you ask me were fairly well tested but not perfect, makes it less of an experience and was frustrating, then I don’t think you remember some of the frustrating non-sense that the RPG maker version had, such as navigating NES World, Locating the Bike which for most of the playthrough you were guaranteed to use because the normal movement speed was slow as shit and that’s usually what stopped a bunch of people from getting farther into it. But I say this with pride, it was part of the experience, it was part of the fun and by all technicality, was it’s own form of rudimentary puzzles and gameplay. Now yes I hear some of you die hard fans cry but there’s not as many effects and not as many doors and worlds, not as many themes and they took out so much. I am sad to say some of the things they took out I will miss, that is if the original game was wiped off the face of the planet with this games release, but it wasn’t.The original is still there as it always was. Because it can’t be replaced. It won’t ever be replaced, people have tried. So onto the point, the gameplay of the 3D one. It’s a horror platformer with puzzle solving and a few jumpscares I guess. You are sitting here reading this, I hope, going wow it’s that easy to categorize? Well yeah sorry to say guys it’s 2018 not 2004, in the time between the first RPG maker classic which I love to death and this newer retake of the very concept of Yume Nikki in 2018 we have had 3 different presidents, saw the rise and fall of many platforms like Vine, went through not 1, not 2 but 3 generations of Video Game Consoles, got 10 versions of the IPhone, like 8 versions of Samsungs Phones and a bunch of other stuff. Needless to say, times change, information is easier to access and we have gotten older and more analytical when it comes to the things we do as hobbies or otherwise. If we are to just look at the word re-imagining at face value and by definition.

reinterpret (an event, work of art, etc.) imaginatively; rethink. 

Is the new Yume Nikki a reinterpretation of the RPG classic? Absolutely, it’s a different take on what the game was. Key word different, problem is in 2018 things are easier to find then 2004, communities are larger, people are older, and things in general are going to less surprising. So from a gameplay standpoint is the new Yume Nikki the 3D Platformer a well thought out game from a gameplay standpoint? Yes it is, it has it’s bugs which is unfortunate, but even games that got GAME OF THE YEAR were horrible buggy messes when they came out and those were backed by Triple A developers, COUGH COUGH FALLOUT 3 EVEN THOUGH I LOVE YOU YOU ARE A MESS COUGH COUGH. Moral of the story for the gameplay, it’s different yes but that doesn’t make it bad just not the same. If you can effectively get from beginning to end regardless how the journey goes, the game did what it needed to do. If you felt obligated to finish -Dream Diary- that was nostalgia and that almost need to feel the magic of the first playthrough of the RPG Maker classic, meaning you aren’t taking Yume Nikki -Dream Diary- as it’s own game, you are trying to take it as a replacement for a beloved classic.

Now that I’m done with that portion I guess, hopefully my point was more or less digestible and hopefully didn’t come off as if you disagree I hate you, cause that’s not my intent, if you don’t like it, you don’t like it, I just want to give a separate perspective. The Soundtrack. I think the Soundtrack in both games is just weird and beautiful and bizarre and conveys messages on a spectrum going from of uncomfortable to serene to almost intimidating. I’m no music expert or major or whatever but the music in Yume Nikki -Dream Diary- not only was very good and did what it meant to do in my opinion but was an incredible nod at the RPG Maker classic featuring a lot of remastered tracks from the original which I think portrayed similar emotions as I felt from the first game. I don’t have much else to say on the soundtrack, it’s timing and consistency felt as good as the original in it’s own special way but should not be interpreted as the same.

So the next thing I want to bring up is story. Now if you are a fan of the RPG Maker classic, you know as well as I do that the story is ¯\_(ツ)_/¯, it’s almost entirely up to interpretation. The story was what you thought it was, you just get kind of a beginning and kind of a ending. People who wanted a classical game with a story with a beginning middle and end, would not really even touch this game. Cause it doesn’t hold your hand, but not in a “is this the dark souls of RPG Maker games?” kind of way. It’s entire conception, how it came to be, how the game played, how the game ends and how you get an ending to begin with and the mysterious creator and their disappearance are all ultimately part of Yume Nikkis’ Story in my opinion. The time the game came out, the so little information about the game that was known, the fact that Youtube was still young, fuck me I was using SKYPE when I played this game in like 2008, it was the perfect storm but only because of the games story outside of the game as well as inside. It was a mess, but it was such an amazing mess that was so hard to describe and time and time and time again the only thing people could really say is “you just have to play it, I can’t explain it without ruining it” That was also a part of the games story if you ask me. It was so strange and so meta but it always made people say the same thing. Now 14 years later, the developer is back, is older, sees his own mistakes better then any of us ever could, and I know if anyone reads this, some of you are artists or content creators or game designers and you know EXACTLY what I’m talking about being hyper critical of your own work. And now he has help now, a team of developers and even though he worked side by side with these people, of course there’s going to be a disconnect, something lost in translation, that’s exactly what fangames are, an interpretation of the original. So yes sadly there’s a bit more going on that’s coherent now but it’s 14 years later being lead by a guy who knows his own mistakes for a game he made alone, which is an achievement yes, but he has seen and allowed to be published in the very beginning of this new game a nod at where his last game left off. Meaning of course he acknowledges what he made and knows people adored it, but people also hated it. It was a judgement call, and you may not like the result but I assure you it was a decision in good faith, at least that the message I got from this game. Now enough beating around the bush, this games story? It does it;s job without telling you to much and honestly I still feel like in this games case like the last one, explaining what happens loses the impact, and some of the impact is because I played the game prior. So I think it does it’s job at re-imagining the story of Yume Nikki the RPG maker game well enough.

Next is visuals, now as an RPG Maker game you could argue it’s not good looking, till you think about it, that one guy, made all of that basically from scratch, it’s poetic, it’s awe-inspiring, that this one guy makes this strange game and it moved people so much and all you really do is just look at things. It’s a stunning game to the eyes because you want to know what this guy could have possibly created next and each environment is so different from the last, each effect so silly and cute or scary and gross all at the same time making you feel these mixed emotions of joy, excitement, nausea, tension all at the same time. It almost mesmerizes you into this feeling of wanting to do everything while simultaneously fearing when it’s all over and the dream ends both literally and metaphorically. It’s only because of this, in my opinion is why visually the RPG maker game is such a work of art. Now for Yume Nikki -Dream Diary- if you ask me I think the game is breathtaking, there’s so much care put into so many little details, yes there are clipping issues and the animations aren’t great but remember Yume Nikki the RPG Maker game wasn’t perfect either, we didn’t care though, we were young, we just wanted to take whatever it was in for what it was worth. From a technical standpoint I feel like this game is stunning in the visual department, but it’s not that complicated compared to games of it’s time, much like the older classic. The older classic came out the same year as Half Life 2, which was a technical marvel when it came out, now it’s kinda dated but regardless that didn’t make Yume Nikki in 2004 any less of an unique experience, and I feel like that same way of thinking should be applied to this new title as best as a person can. I’m going to steal a line from another reviewer loosely, Portal 2s biggest flaw is that it came out after Portal 1.  I must have heard those words 5 years ago or something and they still stick with me. If you look at Portal 2 it’s literally an evolved embodiment of Portal, but you already knew the concept of Portal cause it already came out so it’s shock value, it’s rare and raw punch is lessened because something did that already. It’s the same reasons fangames and Yume Nikki -Dream Diary- won’t feel the exact same. Cause it came out afterwards.

Lastly I wish to touch on a final point before closing this review I guess, more of an analysis. The presentation and atmosphere. Broken down as simply as I can both games share this. They are Surreal Horror Exploration games whose job is to seemingly immerse you in the strange world of a little Japanese girls dreams. That’s where the disconnect begins. Cause even though you wouldn’t think of the RPG Maker classic to be a horror game it has horror themes and the occasional jumpscare or visual for shock value. Now as a re-imagining does the new Yume Nikki -Dream Diary- fit the bill for an amazing strange atmosphere just like the first? Absolutely, it tells most of it’s story passively, no dialogue, nothing crazy, just you and a simple platformer. But alas, it’s a platformer with tension and parts with severely more interaction then the original causing you to feel urgency and demand to escape or jump the next hurdle or challenge, which is not the same as original. Which understandably is this games biggest flaw, if from the very beginning it said it was a remake and that the original is no longer an actual concept. If we were to look at Yume Nikki -Dream Diary- the same way as the original, where we had nothing to compare it too, it’s a lot better of a game and it’s creepy atmosphere is on point, the environments are great and the nods it makes to the older game make me happy.

All in all I think that even with it’s flaws on release that Yume Nikki -Dream Diary- is a stunning love letter to the original game, written by a team of people copying down the words of the creator, ultimately dedicated to those of us who gave Yume Nikki it’s following while simultaneously being something more accessible to wider audience so that by chance they may also play the original game to fully understand why this game exists and what purpose it serves. It’s a thank you letter, an attempt to redo in a different sense what we have tried ourselves many times to recreate and even though a lot of the fan games are great they don’t feel the exact same and neither does this, it’s fantastic but we should all know by now that it can’t be done again, that’s why it’s special. But the creator knew this and wanted to try again but with more knowledge this time and I respect him for it, I respect the team who worked on this game, flaws and all. Perfect or not they wanted us to feel that special feeling one more time, and maybe it wasn’t what you wanted but I don’t even know what I wanted.

-Katy

[xuune]

Hi! I really like your art style and I was wondering how you learned how to draw. I've been wanting to start learning for years but just recently got time, any tip helps!

how i learned to draw:

through anime and disney.

jk xd. it wasnt always anime and disney, but it did inspire me to draw.

i took art classes for 2 years when i was very young, but i wasnt learning what i wanted to learn so i just quit the classes and learned on my own. 

i learned through looking/searching for tutorials online (tumblr, youtube), referencing anatomy off of other people’s art, using myself/other people as a reference, animations, etc. i didnt really get a lot of professional guidance on art, so its just amateur knowledge, lol. 

all of it was practice. im still flawed in my drawings and im still learning. 

there are various ways to learn how to draw, there is no “right” way to draw, and it depends on if you would prefer to learn in a classroom or on your own. 

tips i could give to you:

when you asked for tips, its very vague and broad bc idk what kind of tips you want to know when drawing (ex: tips on anatomy, perspective, lighting, etc.) so i’ll just list general tips ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

always use references 

practice guarantees progress 

draw constantly 

shapes are your bases and can help you out when drawing

search up tutorials on tumblr, youtube, etc. if you’re struggling (other artists can always help you learn smth new) 

even when you feel like your art is shit, keep drawing

if you truly want to continue drawing as a hobby or as something to turn into a profession, then don’t stop. a years/months loss of practice and progress causes you to be behind on how much you could’ve learned in that gap. (this happened to me and i regret it)

don’t make repetitive strokes on whatever you’re drawing. it’ll make your drawing harder to see and it makes ur drawing look stiff 

let your strokes run loose (dont make the strokes too short, make it long. idk how to word it, but it will give you a better feel of movement whenever you’re drawing people/animals)

dont be afraid to ask for feedback from others/be open to criticism even from yourself

dont set low standards for yourself if you truly want to progress when drawing

keep in mind that there will always be something that could’ve been done better about your drawing

dont be static about your drawings (dont draw the same shit, try something new like different perspective angles that you’ve never done before, different colors, different color palettes, different poses, etc. you’ll learn new stuff by trying to draw different things) 

ofc, there will always be other people who could’ve given better tips than me, so maybe this might’ve helped ya in some way. again, there were plenty of other things i couldve mentioned, but these are general things

[ohlawsons]

the art of impulse control

SUMMARY. Sloane lies dead at her feet and Reyes stands vulnerable before her. Sophie knows what the right choice is, here, the logical choice, the choice she should make -- but she’s always been a little too selfish and a little too impulsive; and besides, isn’t making up the whole point of fighting? NOTES.  cave fic ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ LINKS. [ AO3 ] [ FFN ] [ sophie’s tag ]

If Sophie had known that the Charlatan’s meeting was intended to end with Sloane’s death, she might have tried to convince Sloane to stay in Kadara Port.  Or maybe she would have stayed. Or tried to change the Collective’s plans. Or, at the very least, she would’ve warned Sloane.

Either way, Kadara’s self-declared criminal kingpin likely wouldn’t be lying dead at Sophie’s feet.

She didn’t like Sloane. At all. She loathed the bullshit way she ran Kadara, and had held a personal grudge against Sloane ever since she’d first met the leader of the Outcasts and found a gun in her face. But despite her — rather strong — opinions on the woman, murder still didn’t sit right with Sophie, and if she’d known ahead of time there would’ve been too much time to think about it. Reyes would be dead, then, she reckoned, and that thought didn’t sit right with her either.

But she hadn’t had any idea what she was walking into with Sloane, and in the breath between SAM’s warning and the crack of the sniper rifle all Sophie had been able to see was Reyes, face set into hard lines as he stared down Sloane. She could taste the ghost of him on her lips, all warmth and want and whiskey, could feel the memory of his hands on her waist and her back and her thighs — never quite fast enough, never quite rough enough; she was too damn impatient — could hear the echo of his voice as he said her name, said all those  lovely things, made promises she only half expected him to keep. He had completely unraveled her, and Sophie kept her eyes trained on his and it was only in her peripheral that she saw Sloane crumple to the ground.

“Bang.”

“You asshole.” Her brief lapse into memory broken by Reyes’ voice, Sophie marched across to the other side of the cave, careful to make a wide circle around Sloane. She gave Reyes a half-hearted shove — more to make a point, than anything — and it was just enough to make him take a step backwards in surprise. Unable to properly word the rest of her frustrations, Sophie settled for gesturing at Sloane’s body and glaring at Reyes. “You fucker. You—” She cut off with a loud groan, and shoved Reyes again; this time, it didn’t even seem to faze him.

From the entrance of the cave, Vetra let out a long, drawn out sigh. “I’ll let the two of you work this out,” she announced flatly, turning and leaving without even waiting for a response.

“Sophie—”

“How long?” she interrupted, planting her hands on her hips and doing her best to smooth out her expression. Sophie’s mind was whirling, now, as the implications of Reyes’ charade slowly began to sink in; if he’d truly been the Charlatan the entire time, that meant he’d stood by and watched as Sophie had floundered her way through Kadara Port, making enemies with the Outcasts for no other reason than they’d wounded her pride and she had a penchant for raising hell where it maybe shouldn’t be raised. “I mean, did you look at me and think, Gee, a Pathfinder to help me take over an entire fucking city! Because, honestly,” she said with a shrug, the fire in her voice waning ever so slightly, “that’s some pretty clutch planning and the whole ambition thing is kinda hot — but that doesn’t change the fact that I’m pissed off.”

Seriously. Sophie had nearly shot Sloane the first time they’d met — in hindsight, maybe she should have, and saved them all this trouble.

Reyes’ hesitation seemed to lessen somewhat, but he still didn’t quite meet Sophie’s eyes when he spoke. “I thought you could be an ally against Sloane, yes,” he admitted, “but that wasn’t all I saw in you.”

Right. He liked her body. And he knew she couldn’t resist having her ego stroked — damn him, but she was finding herself holding back a grin. “Power and sex. I’m flattered.” There was still an edge to the words, and Sophie could hear her own distaste as she spoke; it was difficult for her to pinpoint exactly what about the entire situation bothered her, given that the revelation that Reyes was the Charlatan was more amusing to her than it was frustrating, and she could easily hand-wave away her guilt over Sloane’s death with some excuse about the greater good.

No, it was the lack of communication on Reyes’ part that was grating on her nerves.

Sophie hadn’t made a secret of her feelings on Sloane, or hidden her interest in helping the Collective — she’d found one of their tucked away bases, for Christ’s sake, and had helped their efforts — so the fact that Reyes hadn’t thought to reach out to her first was mildly insulting.

“Did you not trust my abilities? Or my conviction? Or just me in general?”

Reyes’ lips pressed together in a thin frown. “I trust you,” he assured her, the unexpected sincerity in his tone causing the words to hang heavy in the air between them. There had been a sort of severity to him since he’d revealed himself, his features all hard lines and shadows, but it faded as he took a step towards Sophie — still a breath away, not touching but close enough that she was certain he could feel the heat of her emotion as it radiated from her — and his expression was replaced with a softness that was so open and vulnerable that it caught her off-guard. “I trust you,” Reyes repeated. “I couldn’t— I didn’t know that Sloane would reach out to you.”

She scoffed, throwing up her hands. “Yes, let’s leave Sophie out of it, and we can shoot each other in peace.” Was this how Scott felt, she wondered, having to constantly worry about a sister who regularly made ridiculous and short-sighted decisions?

A few dozen apologies were in order once he woke.

“I had things covered,” Reyes pointed out, giving a glance towards the ledge the sniper had been perched on until a few minutes ago. “And like I said, my goal was to avoid unnecessary deaths in Kadara. I want the same thing you do — stability, and perhaps to re-establish contact with the Nexus — and Sloane would’ve run the Port into the ground with the way things were going.”

“Reyes.” Sophie cleared her throat, opting for her best logical argument voice — level, deadpan, and just a tad bit unimpressed. She was inclined to believe him, at this point, about his motives and why he’d contacted Sloane, but that didn’t mean she wasn’t still miffed at being left out of planning the entire ordeal. “When have you known me to be a real deep thinker about anything? All you would’ve had to say is, Sophie, we’re taking out Sloane tonight — you in?” She pursed her lips, one eyebrow quirking upwards. “Do you really think I wouldn’t have shown up, no questions asked, just to kick some ass?”

“You’re hotheaded and reckless, yes,” Reyes conceded, amusement beginning to shine in his eyes, “but not a murderer. I was trying to leave you out of this.”

“But you knew,” she groaned, feeling her shoulders begin to slump. “You knew I how I felt about Sloane. If you would’ve just told me, I could’ve… Well, you’re right, I wouldn’t have killed her,” she reasoned, “but I could’ve helped. Done something. I’ve been wanting to get her out of Kadara Port since I got here. You know that,” Sophie repeated, a pleading edge beginning to creep into her voice. She didn’t know what good it would do, now, after everything was already said and done, but she was hoping that Reyes could figure out whatever it was that she needed to hear.

“Of course I knew.” With a sad sort of smile, Reyes reached up to cup her face, one thumb trailing lightly across her skin. The amusement was gone, once again replaced by sincerity. “You’ve always been rather up front with your opinions of Sloane. How was I supposed to know that you wouldn’t feel the same about me? That you wouldn’t just be trading one criminal for another?”

Vaguely aware that she had been leaning into his touch, Sophie let her gaze drift down to Reyes’ jacket, where her fingers were toying with the edge of the fabric. “You’re you,” she started, forcing herself to look back up at him. “You didn’t pull a gun on me the first time we met. I mean, you did make me pay for both of our drinks, but I think you made up for it when you took me to a fancy party just so we could steal some of Sloane’s whiskey.” She frowned, letting her hands drop lamely to her sides; she wasn’t any good at actually voicing things like this, and damn but it would’ve been easier if she’d have shut him up with a kiss like in the vids. “I mean, I’m not sleeping with Sloane, so I apologize if I’m a bit biased.”

He gave a quiet laugh, but otherwise seemed to ignore her flippant remark. “I was worried that…” He trailed off, eyes still searching Sophie’s face, and began again. “When you look at people, you see the best in them, whether they deserve it or not. Like with your crew, or the angara. Or me. I… liked that, the way you look at me,” he admitted, almost sheepishly, before taking a steadying breath. “I may have hidden that I was the Charlatan, but I haven’t lied — about anything.”

“This doesn’t really change a damn thing,” Sophie agreed, breaking into a grin despite herself and hoping she didn’t look quite as elated at his words as she felt. It was selfish, she knew, to be so satisfied that things between them could continue uninterrupted; she should be questioning him, should be critical of everything they’d been through. “And once again, you’re right. Your mouth is definitely your best feature, and it’s absolutely the only reason I still put up with you.”

Not a lie, technically, but so far from the full truth.

The kissing was good, yes, and the sex was better, but there was so much more that kept drawing her to Kadara. She had fun when she was with Reyes, and in turn he was more than capable of keeping pace with her — whether it was in combat or flirting or just swapping stories — without the typical accusations she’d learned to shrug off. Slow down, people always told her, stop and smell the roses, let’s wait a minute and talk about this. And that wasn’t even accounting for the scoundrel-with-a-heart-of-gold cliche he so often fell into — like now, talking about peace after arranging a murder, or envisioning a bright and thriving future for a city full of criminals. His methods should give her pause, perhaps, but that would mean questioning one of the best things to  happen to her since arriving in Andromeda.

And really, Sophie was a woman of simple needs, and Reyes filled most of them. Besides, there was something enticing about being with the self-proclaimed king of a criminal haven.

Her answer — or perhaps her grin, or the noticeable lift in her mood — sparked something within Reyes, and a slow smirk broke through his solemn expression.  “You have terrible taste in men.”

“You said it, not me,” she pointed out; Reyes began to say something else, but this time Sophie did cut him off with a kiss. Her grip on his jacket tightened, pulling him down until their lips met — the kiss all tongue and heat and urgency — and she was being forced backwards, moving until she was flush between Reyes and the cave wall.

There was too much armor between them, too much stress in her limbs, too many reminders of the confrontation they’d just faced. But Sophie wasn’t thinking about that — wasn’t thinking much at all — as they parted and Reyes’ lips moved along her jaw and down to her neck, his hands at her waist and hips as her own hands tangled in his hair. Teeth ran slow along her skin, and Sophie’s breath hitched. Too much armor. “This is a good start,” she forced out, breathless, “to convincing me I made the right choice.”

He laughed, low and breathy in her ear. “And it’s certainly only the start.”

It was a promise that made a shiver run down her spine, in both anticipation and desire, but Sophie forced herself to pull back just enough to look up at Reyes, one eyebrow quirking upwards. “Reyes Vidal,” she began, managing to keep her voice mostly even, “you better not be planning sex in a cave, because I have standards. I know they’re pretty low, but still — it’s a cave.”

“Mm. So a back room in a bar is fair game,” he pointed out, not bothering to hide his disappointment though his grip on her loosened, “and so is a storage room, but not this?” His voice was filled with amusement, teasing rather than pressing, and with some small amount of effort he untangled himself from her. After a moment the levity vanished, and when Reyes spoke again his worry had returned. “Is it the location, or something else?”

The question caught Sophie by surprise, and she had to take a moment to collect her thoughts. As much as their surroundings were definitely killing the mood, Reyes was right — it wasn’t the only thing making her uncomfortable. “It’s… both. We have a lot to talk about, don’t we?” She didn’t think she had a problem with Reyes being the Charlatan — it was the sort of revelation that would take a while to digest, she reckoned — but she did want the chance to clear the air between them.

Whatever this was, and whatever they were, would have to be figured out. Which, of course, meant talking about it and thinking over it and just generally dealing with the situation — none of which was typically high on Sophie’s to do list. But if Reyes was as sincere about it — them — as he seemed, then Sophie supposed she could put in some effort, too.

Just not the sort of effort that required taking off her pants in a cave. Especially not with Vetra so close.

“So, maybe, we put this on hold, and I go back to Kadara and get a little drunk, and we’ll deal with everything tomorrow?”

Reyes didn’t answer right away, studying Sophie carefully — she almost teased him about the little worry-lines creasing his forehead, but decided against it; his concern was as touching as it was unexpected — and pressed a light, perfectly chaste kiss to her lips. “Anything,” he assured her. “Whatever you need.”

“Technically,” she drawled in an attempt to lighten the mood, “I don’t need any of that. It’s just, I have this thing with Liam. We’re working on impulse control. This seems like the kind of situation where it applies.” As a sort of experiment, Sophie slid one of her hands into Reyes’ and began leading him back out towards where Vetra and the Nomad waited; it felt good, even despite her gloves, and she added it to the mental list of things to contemplate.

Which, she wanted to do — contemplate. Think. She wanted to be certain of where she and Reyes were headed — individually, or together, or whatever — and she knew that if she gave in and led him straight back to the Tempest like she wanted to, that’s where they would be headed.

A distraction that would keep pulling her back to Kadara.

Maybe she wanted something different. Something in addition to all the sex. Reyes seemed to, and Sophie couldn’t deny that the idea certainly intrigued her, even given the mess they’d just been through.

But that was a question for the next day, and Sophie had more pressing matters to attend to at the moment — like Vetra, seated atop the Nomad, beer in hand. She had the right idea; Sophie pulled herself up to sit beside her, sliding to the side to make room for Reyes and patting the now-empty spot beside her. “Need a ride back?” she asked, the question more a roundabout way of asking him to stick around for a few more minutes. “ We’ve got a third seat.”

“I suppose I could, assuming you’re not planning to make any other stops. I do have a city to run, now.”

She inched away as Reyes began to slip an arm around her waist, holding up a hand to say hold on and sliding backwards, turning and stretching across the Nomad to reach the interior, hoisting up a small cooler from where the rover’s fourth seat had originally been. “Refreshments,” she explained, leaving the cooler within reach and pulling out two of the remaining five bottles. She handed a beer to Reyes, clinking their bottles together in some semblance of a toast before reaching over to pull Vetra’s from her grasp. Ignoring the turian’s unimpressed sigh, Sophie held up the drink. “Blue label is levo, orange label is dextro. You owe me big time,” she informed him, handing Vetra her drink back, “because it’s hell trying to get the Nexus to pay for our contraband booze.”

Reyes took a sip, then studied the bottle for a moment, looking impressed. “You got the Initiative to pay for this?”

“Emergency field rations on our requisition order,” Vetra said. “Ryder just thinks it’s hard because she’s about as subtle as a brick. You can’t just tell people you’re turning a high-dollar exploratory vehicle into a party rover.”

“That’s why I keep you around, Vetra,” Sophie pointed out, leaning back into Reyes. “Like how you convinced Tann to pay the tab that me and Liam ran up on Aya.”

“Diplomatic outreach. Which doesn’t work as well the second time.”

“Luckily, continued investigations still works as an excuse to come to Kadara.” She flashed Reyes a crooked grin. “Don’t let things settle down too much, or I’ll have to come up with some other bullshit reason.”

“Which means I’ll have to come up with another bullshit reason,” Vetra interjected. “I already don’t like you, Vidal. Try not to make it worse.”

“Good thing you aren’t the one I’m trying to impress.” The statement was directed at Vetra, but Reyes spoke to Sophie, the words low and breathy and punctuated with a kiss at her jawline.

Vetra sighed again and took a long drink. “Keep that up, and the two of you can walk back to town.”