#so many tag variants how do y'all do this

[anchovymacaroni]

Tried a more chibi style :>

[wahhbajack]

I block 50 variants of proship tags. I block account after account. I still see the posts. They are SO pervasive lmao

Listen. I'm proship. But I miss when fandom was more than "I ship taboo things and that's my entire personality teehee". Back in my day, that was just called shipping. All of it was just shipping. Ya had your OTP, your nOTP, cross ships, rare pairs, and crack ships. Nothing was this complicated and it still does not need to be. Aizen/Ichigo wasn't called a comship or whatevs. It was just... A ship. Ship your shit and live your online life. Make fandom fun again. Y'all know how we block ships/content we don't like?

Did you know?

You can also block antis without writing entire essays about them and posting screen caps of their bullshit. Y'all mock them for engaging with content they don't like, but I see so many proship people doing the exact same thing. I'm not sure if most of you are trying to scream louder than the antis screaming at you, but it's counterproductive. You're just giving them MORE attention. Block, ignore, and do what ya want. Quit killin the vibe.

[lokiinmediasideblog]

I Intentionally Start Shit in the Loki Tag

If you complain about Sylvie being "harmful queer rep" BUT want "Lady Loki" in the MCU, which was Loki possessing Sif's body just to torment Sif, I need you to sit down and shut up. a. Genderfluid people don't go by "Lady " when they're femme or women. b. If you don't see the transphobic dogwhistles in the comics possession subplot, I don't know what to tell you... But let's say that hag that wrote those crappy books would love it. c. If you weren't aware about this, maybe you should read the wiki at least before giving uninformed opinions.

I definitely agree that they should not have led people on with the promise of genderfluid rep during the promotion of the series. But get mad at Disney/Marvel for that. Not at the writers or Sophia Di Martino that had to cave in to Feige's demands. That's literally what they have to do.

I really don't give a damn about the "autogynephilia" allegations, which again, is ALSO PRESENT IN CIS WOMEN. Like why the fuck should I care about someone finding themselves hot? There's fascists out there. AGP even if it was a trans-specific thing harms no one. The only harm said to come from it is DUE TO FASCISM because it plays into RESPECTABILITY POLITICS.

If you use AI to create a "proper" Lady Loki or love interest for Loki, you can't complain about the blatant product placement in S2. I am not a fan of product placement either and won't defend it, but those are the rules. Show some integrity. And before you ask, I have not given a cent to Disney since they pissed me off with attempts to trademark Dia de los Muertos for Coco.

If you complain about how being a "Loki" is not a role (unlike Spiderman) and how it should have been all 100% Tom Hiddleston, you don't get to call it selfcest as a gotcha, because you're already differentiating between the variants with different DNA. Like do y'all hate selfcest or not? Make up your mind. The series treats a Loki as an archetype of sorts, so it can be a role. Also, having the same name does not make you related because we don't know what Sylvie's parents are? And we don't even know if Sylvie is also a Jotun, a prop claims she isn't.

If you say you want Sylvie dead but claim to not be misogynistic, because you'd love if a specific love interest from the comics or mythology replaced her, STFU. You only like those because you can project whatever the fuck you want onto them.

If you claim Sylvie is a misogynistic depiction of women but salivate over characters written by cishet white men in the 1960s-1980s that made wanting to fuck Thor or being in a monogamous marriage with Loki their entire personality (there's so MANY OF THESE), STFU. Do you hear yourself? And no, it's not misogynistic of me, a woman, to criticize offensive depictions of women by cishet white men. They're not real.

Our MCU!Loki is not the young adult Ikol reincarnation currently. Of course 20-something Verity is not going to be there! The Loki show should be praise for having multiple female cast members around the same age as the protagonist and pragmatic clothing choices that allowed SdM to nurse her baby.

Selfcest isn't real and I cry tears of boredom whenever someone clutches their pearls over it.

The comics aren't perfect. As much as I loved the recent Dan Watters run (and German Peralta's art), the comics art has some very questionable tendencies, especially regarding Loki's nose when she's femme. It's associated with how some kinds of facial features are considered masculine or feminine (and racialized). Noses have no gender, ffs! Women with nose bumps exist! For some reason Loki always has a tiny button nose when she's a woman or femme. There's also the BLATANT physiognomy that has ALWAYS PLAGUED Thor comics since their inception, and Loki's facial features as they've become more "grey" and less evil is an interesting study. Peralta's far from being the only artist with this problem, and is far from being the most problematic. For comparison from Loki (2023) run:

Loki from ye olden days:

[asoulofstars]

Five Characters, Five Tags

Stolen from @dilffactory, because while my comfort characters are super predictable and obvious, it's still fun.

1.) Riona -- I know it's half cheating to put Riona, because she's my OC, but like. I've been writing her in some form since 2010 or 2011; she's literally part of my soul, and she's the main reason that I've connected with y'all the way that I have. Thank you to everyone who writes with Riona and/or lets me just toss Riona thoughts into other character dynamics, because she really is my favorite always.

2.) The OG comfort character/fictional crush: Angel -- Listen, I don't think you guys understand how much Angel has shaped my life, from being the baseline of my ridiculous type in fictional characters (especially fictional men) to giving me some of the High Standards (TM) that I do have for a real life partner (because like, Angel is extremely emotionally intelligent and also extremely willing to do self reflection and actively make changes to grow), and then obviously my intense love of DB that literally made me start my college career looking to go into forensic anthropology at the FBI because of "Bones". That didn't end up happening, but that path formulated so much of how I write and everything else, and I'll never change the journey. Also shout-out to the, admittedly subconscious, influences that he had on making Riona's character.

3.) Jane Foster, my girl. Has literally been my favorite character since I got into MCU fandom. She means the absolute world to me, and I adore her so fucking much. I've made some lifelong friends because of her, and I'm so very grateful.

4.) James "Sawyer" Ford -- Y'all remember my LOST hyperfixation, and I know that was annoying as fuck, and I hate myself every fucking time I feel that hyperfixation remotely coming back around, but like. I adore my man, and I wrote so much LOST fanfic that really helped me develop myself as a writer as well.

5.) I have so many OCs of my friends that I would like to list. Luke Milton & Casey Milton-Peters from @lionofstone, Anna and Artemis from @niceofthenine, @wintershieldedheart's Margot, OCs from past rp partners that no longer come around.

6.) Just some of my rp partners in general have made their variants & interpretations of canon characters into my comfort characters. Just know that if we're mutuals, I love and adore the work and care you've put into your muse. Even if we're not mutuals and I'm following you, I do so because I love how you write. Like, I know I'm a sappy fool and all that, but it's true and genuine. People with extremely niche muses or extremely canon divergent muses or people who just elevate their muses well above canon. Y'all are amazing, and I adore each and every one of you.

I have way more than five comfort characters, and like. I know most of y'all could easily call me out on the "garbage man I plucked out of the fandom dumpster" for most of my fandoms, but like. One of the draws for most of my fandoms is the sense of found family, and so like. All of them become my comfort characters, because they're part of that inherent family dynamic.

Thank you all for being my friends and for letting me love your characters, too.

[arom-antix]

Okay so I was just gonna do this in the tags but I ran out of room so HERE WE GO INSTEAD. I just need y'all to understand how many beautiful flowers that exist just. everywhere.

Disclaimer: these are just my faves I can think of right now, there are PLENTY more and I IMPLORE you to go looking. Just search for like "uncommon flowers" or something, you will not regret it.

ANYWAY, ON TO THE FLOWERS!

My first love was my dear Lamprocapnos spectabilis, also known as Dicentra spectabilis or bleeding hearts. Or a long list of other names according to the Internet. Where I'm from they're called lieutenants' hearts. Anyway, this beauty (which also comes in white btw, it's gorgeous).

My grandma had these in her backyard, all the way in the back where are section was cut off from the rest by big, fluffy hedges and a big, old tree filtered the worst of the sharp sun. Whenever we visited in spring, I'd go sit there in the quiet and admire the lieutenants' hearts in the warm, dappled sunlight.

Nostalgia over, NEXT LOVELY FLOWER! This is actually one that only really caught my eye less than a year ago I think? Anyway, Camellia japonicas are AMAZING. I can't list all the wonderful variants, just look them up, there's a Camellia for everyone but three of my personal faves are C. japonica alba plena, C. japonica nobilissima, and C. japonica volunteer.

First, my favourite: alba plena.

Like I need y'all to go look this flower up from every angle and marvel at how GORGEOUS it is. This is not a bridal looking flower, this flower IS the bride.

Next: nobilissima.

Yes, I am aware that nobilissima is very similar to alba plena and no, I do not care. I love them both so much. And this is just a great example that there is indeed a Camellia for everyone because you can get exactly what you want. Anyway, love you nobilissima, stay pretty.

Third, my baby: volunteer.

Just look at this flower. Like, what are you doing, girl? What's up with those petals, my man, did the printer jam? I'm kidding, I love you, you double-flowered wonder.

Okay, I'll let you find the rest of the beauties on your own on the internet but rest assured that you will not regret doing so.

Next up, the flower you all know but don't actually know at all:

The orchid

There are SO many variants that look like basically anything but I'm here to bring you three of my faves: Habenaria radiata, Dendrophylax lindenii, and last but CERTAINLY not least, Caleana major. Just wait, you'll see.

First: Habenaria radiata, also known as the White Egret Orchid.

Like, come on. Just look at it. Is that not one of the best flowers you've ever seen? Look at it. I know I will be doing so forever. Can you tell I have a thing for white flowers yet?

Okay, next up, my silly lil guy: Dendrophylax lindenii, also known as the Ghost Orchid.

I can't stop laughing at this flower, it's just. I mean, just look. Mans is vibin. Just hangin out and so is his willy. This flower will forever be a treasure to me.

OKAY, THE ONE YOU'VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR: Caleana major, also known as the Flying Duck Orchid.

I am not kidding, this is a real orchid that just. Exists. Is this not the best thing ever? I know I just said that about the White Egret Orchid but I take that back, THIS is the UNDISPUTED winner of greatest orchid to ever exist, nay, best flower. I don't plan on every getting a tattoo but if I do and it's a flower tattoo, it will be of the Flying Duck Orchid, mark my words.

(Sidenote: I kept misspelling it as the Flying Fuck Orchid and I thought y'all deserved to know)

Next up on the list: lilies. There are so many types of lilies (I know I keep saying there are a lot, just. You're here, you have the Internet to find them all, please do) but I gotta give a shout out to my love Lycoris radiata, aka the Red Spider Lily.

I just love this flower so much. I've been into hanakotoba (Japanese flower language) for a while because uhm hidden messages in flower use in my art, yes please! And if you're wondering, yes, this flower is sad. Do you really think I'd ever add joy to my art? You're hilarious, so sweet. Anyway, love you, my spindly angst flower, stay bloomin.

Another lily I want to highlight that I'm sure even those who don't know flowers know from Minecraft are Convallaria majalis, aka Lily of the Valley.

I've always loved what we call bell flowers where I'm from and the Lily of the Valley is such an adorable variant. Look at this little beauty. So polite. They look like they emit LoFi but that really chill and quiet LoFi that makes you feel like you're getting a hug when you really need it. The lilies don't say anything, they're just there, bringing you tea.

Anyway, I'm going to cap it here because I'm procrastinating stuff for tomorrow that I really should be getting ready but I hope I at least managad to add a couple more flowers to your list of lovelies.

What's everyone's favourite flowers that aren't like. The normal ones. Like everyone's a fan of roses and sunflowers what's a more niche one. One you don't get in gift sets. Mine's sweet peas

[catras-breakup-song]

I saw the catradora antis dni banner on a post of yours and I just wanted to ask if I’m insane or stupid? It’s the canon relationship of the show??? How can you be an anti, it was what the whole show was arguably about?

Like anti carries more weight than just disliking something right? I don’t hate glitra and glimmadora but I wouldn’t call myself a fan either. If a fic I’m enjoying has those ships in it I’m not suddenly gonna drop the fic.

I guess I just don’t understand being an anti? Who cares? You arguing about it isn’t suddenly gonna make it disappear, it’s the internet. People are gonna be doing shit you don’t like all the time, so I can’t imagine going through the mental anguish/stress of thinking about it 24/7.

Sorry for ranting in your asks I’m just very confused.

oh, you really have NO idea. i wish i lived in blissful ignorance like you (probably up until now though)...

for example, i realize the reaction gif i just used is unfortunately embedded from one, which i already had blocked both on this & my main blogs but somehow showed up in the search results anyway under "spop glimmer"!

but yes, there are MANY of them out there. they either believe catra is irredeemably abusive, that catra & adora are sisters, or both, and they like to clown on stans of the ship which can be very hurtful.

filter out these tags in settings for your own peace of mind, as well as any variants (posting as a screenshot to avoid cross-tagging showing up in their results):

seriously, y'all had better not interact. there is nothing directly to be argued here so leave me alone PLEASE.

[doberbutts]

ok but the major term transmascs have to describe the specific oppression we face was coined by a violently antiblack, anti-indigenous, lesbophobe who has a fetishistic kink related to correctively raping lesbians and gaslighting them into thinking they’re men so like. maybe use another word that isn’t associated with that. bc the majority of the transmascs who use it are associated with him and harassed if they speak against him. and also with the harassment of black transmascs like voc.

Give me proof that he is anti-black and anti-indigenous, specifically. Because the "proof" I see is that he got into a dispute over the usage of the acronym ABO during a discussion about Omegaverse theory and how a lot of trans guys are uncomfortable with the way it's treated in fanfic. An Aboriginal blogger objected to the acronym being used in this way because it is also a slur used against Aboriginal people. He initially protested this because words, in fact, often have more than one meaning and many people who have it trigger-tagged use specifically that variant and he was very clearly not talking about Aboriginal people, but eventually relented and agreed to only use the acronym with the slashes A/B/O or call it Omegaverse instead.

That was apparently not good enough. He was then labelled anti-black after a short vent regarding Biden's Juneteeth declaration, calling it too little too late, a sentiment shared by many black people (including myself!) and said he wanted more from this country's leadership in terms of reparations. This was deemed... talking over black people? Because he thought our historically racist leadership was doing too little to make up for slavery?

He *then* was labelled harassing two bloggers who have honestly been doing a lot of petty shit-flinging and launching personal harassment campaigns when one of his followers eventually decided to call them to the carpet for 8 months of abuse and block-dodging and call-out-posting- and... let's not forget that these bloggers also outright deny black people who disagree with them their blackness by calling them white-aligned and coons and monkeys the second any black blogger comments on their bad behavior.

In other words, the 'proof' I've seen is a stupid petty personal dispute that got way out of hand and should have ended when all parties blocked each other.

As for his kink blog- again I say that digging through someone's private (PASSWORD PROTECTED) consensual sex life for dirt is like... old hat homophobia and transphobia. But even ignoring that, yes he was engaging in some borderline SSC kinks consensually with a trans woman partner and some of that was indeed deliberate misgendering, forced masculinization, and consensual non-consent. And eventually he realized he was not comfortable continuing and stopped, and the screenshots were taken well after the fact. He has said this more than once on his blog. You don't need to like what someone does in the privacy of their own bedroom (or in this case on a blog you shouldn't have had access to), but understand that not only was it consensual but that his partner enjoyed it and wanted it. You are calling him a predator because he engaged in consensual sex that was asked of him.

(also it's really fucking weird that y'all are so hung up on that but the trans masc and trans man and ftm tags are constantly filled with trans fems looking for trans mascs to practice forced fem/misgendering/cnc kinks on and y'all do literally nothing about it- idgaf what people are into as long as it's SSC but at least be consistent)

What's mind-boggling to me is that he's mostly just been doing his own thing on his own blog, getting top surgery, fixing his homelessness, and being isolated because anyone who dares actually research anything in regards to this is immediately put to the axe. That blocklist is because he was initially resistant to changing an acronym that people use to avoid a specific trigger that has nothing to do with the racist slur the acronyn shares letters with. Literally. This has snowballed out of proportion from that.

Meanwhile two trans fems so far have been called fakers or outright called men as a result of this block list. Several bloggers have recieved death threats, rape threats, transphobic garbage, ableist garbage, and worse. Who is harassing who, here? Because these bloggers were mainly talking among themselves (or in some cases, just talking TO themselves as there are vent blogs with only a small handful of followers on that list) and not going out of their way to bother anyone. When multiple trans fems spoke up saying hey, this isn't cool, I believe the same thing as these trans mascs and intersex people, put me on the list too... it was denied because the list is "only" for trans mascs. How does that make sense? If people who believe in something are all dangerous, why is it only some people being punished for it?

[grison-in-space]

yeah, all of that is accurate. starting with the middle link by Angela Chen, the dopamine as reward prediction error vs dopamine as motivational tag isn't--it's not a conflict, they can both be true at the same time (i.e. the size of the dopamine spike at an unexpected reward can mediate how highly motivated you are to seek the same reward). I'm gonna ramble some here while my models run and I wait for the tasty data to pop out, but I'll be nice and give y'all a cut to tuck it behind. (no, i mean it. I'm skipping my afternoon ritalin dose and doing this instead. rambling is polite.)

it is not a coincidence that many if not most of the people who really drill into dopamine are funded by grants oriented towards understanding addiction, including non-chemical-dependence variants of addiction like gambling addiction. (this includes me! I have been funded by training grants through NIDA for a couple of years now. fuck it's so easy to find money here. it's amazing. land of milk and honey.)

re: the Chen piece, I am actually totally fine with the framework of "wanting" vs "enjoying" (dopamine being very firmly on the "wanting" end and totally uninvolved with "hedonistic" or enjoyment aspects of pleasure) coming from a behavioral ecology/animal behavior focus based on observing behavioral outcomes. But that's probably a disciplinary variation: I am much more knee-jerk cynical about overly computational approaches to brain function because I think they tend to over-emphasize disconnected modularity in a way I don't think is bourne out by the literature.

I'm way more oriented, I find, to longer-term changes in brain composition as a consequence of changes in gene regulation and protein composition than most people with more classical neuroscience/systems neuroscience backgrounds, and that's in large part a function of my background. We talk a lot about genetic action potentials and longer-scale changes in the composition of the brain (we're talking in the range of a few hours to a few days rather than milliseconds) relative to people whose ultimate interest is oriented around understanding the human brain. Probably this is because immediate early gene studies require a lot of brains and y'all in NIH land have that thing where the hegemonic framework is to approach all variation in terms of deviations from an assumed-uniform healthy or typical form. I'm also frequently annoyed by the absence of studies into variation in receptor abundance here coming from my neuroendocrine background: the stress and trauma folks pay some attention after all the Meaney work, but it's such a gaping absence to me over in my current corner.

I am not going to stop asking people to tell me what the fuck c-Fos even does even though usually people gawp at me and essay "uh.... it's a sign of brain activations....?" when I do. (No, it's a harbinger of changes in regulation of a whole bunch of downstream genes--the protein creates a lot of early-stage expression changes. You can even do IEG work with stuff like actively transcribing ribosomes, then nab the mRNA that are in the process of being translated and back-transcribe them into DNA which you can then sequence, if you really want to know what kinds of genes are being turned on by different contexts. Which is what I wanted to do in my diss, except I ran out of time.)

I think that understanding housekeeping genes and how gene regulation changes over time to create a brain that responds differently to the stimuli around it and, you know, having a basic understanding of genetics and cell biology is crucial for psychologists in training, just like it is for neuroscientists. Unfortunately these things tend to be badly neglected in the training that most psych-oriented people receive prior to grad school, so you're basically at the mercy of whatever teachers a self-motivated grad student is able to scare up within their own field.

Anyway. All that is short for "I have pretty good reasons to be interested in the endocrine and protein changes in the brain that don't necessarily work like a purely modular series of computational processes, and I see a lot of holes in this discipline that ignore things I know to be very important to brains reacting to context. despite being really computationally motivated in my approaches, I am more than a little cynical about philosophical reductions to emphasize computationally defined aspects of cognition, brains, and behavior.

do not get me started on ethology in this fucking field, we'll be here all day. (although the bit I linked this morning on the hide and seek rats, that stuff is pretty great. Emily Dennis, interviewed in the first link, is also doing some fabulous stuff with more ethologically inflected approaches in the research.)

okay back to dopamine. and the two Jesse Meadows links. look, I'm almost out of ritalin so I'm skipping my afternoon dose and this counts as lit review time.

oh dear fucking christ in a cracker that first BBC piece is driving me nuts. link to the fucking scientific article or at least cite it so I can actually read the methods, you cowards, don't just link to the fucking journal, what the fuck am I supposed to do with that?! Okay. Okay. Fine. Meadows understandably doesn't track down the actual study, so here it is (Salimpoor 2011, see bottom for a full citation).

*squints* as much as anything else, this article actually makes me think about ASMR-style responses, since that's essentially how we talk about the "frission" they describe trying to study in pop culture in these the halcyon days of 2023. I was particularly squinting at this work when I approached it because "brain imaging" nearly always means fMRI, a technique I loathe because its combination of being non-invasive enough for human researchers and generating pretty heat maps results in its being shared with way more confidence than it really deserves: it measures tiny changes in blood flow in the brain and then lines up a bunch of assumptions about what those changes really ultimately mean about brain function and interaction. again, I'm an animal person. I want to know what the proteins are doing. this particular paper does use fMRI, but I have to grudgingly admit that it is also making an effort to look at actual dopamine transmission using PET scans.

That said, as they note, PET scans are absolute garbage in terms of temporal resolution--especially twelve years ago!--so they combine the fMRI in an effort to hunt down the areas where you have a bunch of dopamine on the PET scan during this behavioral test. Well, okay, but the catecholamine distribution throughout the brain is always going to be most pronounced in the striatum; that's dopamine central station. so the PET check is... good practice guys but a priori it's a weird focus to take, and like.... okay, we found dopamine in this spot, and we also found these BOLD changes. We didn't look at any other neuroendocrine system or brain region, so uh, don't worry too much about that, just look at our pretty correlations in our tiny ass sample size. Fuck, the chain of causation is loose here! Honestly, this is not very good evidence for dopamine as an agent of hedonistic/pleasure-related experience as a whole; I assume the authors aren't promoting it that way, because they're pretty reasonable about what their work can and can't save what with the whole thing where it's been ten years. but lol at the notion that this bro Matt Raekelboom is using it as evidence that dopamine controls hedonism.

Everything else Meadows says is essentially accurate here re: sample size and drug history. (Although I would note, speaking of Reefer Madness, that endocannibinoids are way more involved in the hedonic aspect of pleasure and enjoyment than dopamine even pretends to be. Yes, that name is not a coincidence.) having finished reading--yeah I got no notes on Meadows' summary of the takedown for this other influencer dude Matt. right, third bit.

fuck, I'm glad I don't spend much if any time in influencer spaces tbqh, it looks absolutely enraging. too fuckin tired for that shit. what in the shit is this 'low-dopamine' fuckery. I mean I can certainly see the utility of a nice quiet start to the morning if you happen to be easily overstimulated and relatively reactive to environmental variation, but I wouldn't say dopamine is particularly likely to be involved.

oh dear fuck "optimizing their testosterone" I don't even want to know. "Behaviorally, the neurotransmitter has more to do with motivation and avoidance, and has even been shown to increase in situations that really don’t feel good, like losing a fight (in animals) or hearing gunshots (in veterans with PTSD)." yeah, that's just exactly right--dopamine is too tangled up with learning and motivation for you not to expect to see it in wildly unpleasant contexts!

christ. fuck! even the fucking addictions literature cheerfully acknowledges that artificially stimulating the dopamine system with drugs can actually sensitize the dopaminergic response to things like cocaine, not just blunting it. [Bradberry 2007].

“We’re not scientists here,” says one motivational influencer using sludge content to promote dopamine detoxing.8 “I don’t give a fuck what the dopamine molecule is. This is how it works in the real world.”

what in the giardia-guzzling shitcuddling dipshittery is this. what. what--do people listen to this kind of self-satisfied intellectual smegma scraping or. oh no. oh ye gods. I find myself humbled by the sheer scope of human hubris. you don't know what works in the real world without a systematic evaluation of the natural world, cupcake! what do you think a scientist even is?! You're undermining the foundation of your own claimed expertise!

oh I need a moment to experience several stages of grief.

maybe a few more.

Dopamine ISN'T ABOUT HEDONIC PLEASURE IT DOESN'T IMPACT HEDONIC PLEASURE IN ANY WAY YOU HUCKSTERS HAWKING ROTTEN SHELLFISH TO THE UNWARY AND NOSE BLIND

it's just that jolt of catching a target or achieving, and while that little jolt is pleasant if you're not catching much else that feels satisfying, it's not going to give you the hedonic delightful content sensation of a full belly and a comforting security in your life. That's a different mechanism. For that you want weed endocannabinoid signaling, not dopamine. For fuck's sake, think about the drugs that we know just absolutely chuck dopamine signaling into overdrive. Cocaine is a biggie, but there's one particular drug that infamously has like five different mechanisms for dumping ALL THE DOPAMINE into your system at once.

it's meth by the way I'm talking about meth.

works cited

do you like, want to try and entrain your brain towards the state of someone high on coke or meth? like, is that a state that feels inherently hedonistic and nice to these people? I mean, presumably they're the sort of people who would drive themselves into problematic use of amphetamines to get work done, but have you ever noticed how many of those people are actually happy? most of 'em ain't, because they've structured their entire values systems and reinforcement protocols towards dopamine rewards exclusively, either because they've tagged more hedonistic enjoyment and/or relaxation to anxiety or because they're never satisfied by what they attain. because that's the kicker. dopamine is fundamentally not satisfying. it's a shiny award dangling over the horizon. you can hook it up to motivation real easy, but it's actively antithetical to satisfaction.

Bradberry, C. W. (2007). Cocaine sensitization and dopamine mediation of cue effects in rodents, monkeys, and humans: areas of agreement, disagreement, and implications for addiction. Psychopharmacology, 191, 705-717.

Salimpoor, V. N., Benovoy, M., Larcher, K., Dagher, A., & Zatorre, R. J. (2011). Anatomically distinct dopamine release during anticipation and experience of peak emotion to music. Nature neuroscience, 14(2), 257-262.

Ok feel free to ignore if you don't wanna get into it, but what are the things people get wrong about dopamine that bother you? I'm curious

Dopamine is not a reward or happiness neurotransmitter, it's implicated in many processes (including things totally unrelated to the subject, like motor control) but if anything it's more associated with forecasting and search and surprise than with reward. So getting tons of stimulating little boosts of input from tiktok or whatever cant blow out your dopamine pathways or whatever people claim it does. Dopamine detoxes are also not really a thing, quitting social media and appreciating slowness and presence are rewarding because theyre less stressful and overloading, not because social media is like "too much pleasure" or whatever people think.

[cluster-b-culture-is]

Hello! Welcome to cluster-b-culture-is! This blog is run by two plurals who have cluster b disorders and who want to spread positivity and awareness for them, along with building a safe space for others.

As mentioned in the blog description, we will not be responding publicly to hate and negativity. It will either be deleted or responded to privately. Any discourse sent to our blog will be deleted as well; this is meant to be a safe place for personality disorders.

And, as a quick aside since we've gotten many asks about this, cluster B disorders are a group of personality disorders including ASPD, NPD, BPD, and HPD. There are two other clusters (cluster A and cluster C), but this blog is specifically focused on cluster B disorders.

Information, a discord server, and introductions are below the cut!

Do not repost posts from this blog without explicit permission and credit. Reblogs are okay.

Information

- We support informed self-diagnosis and non-traumagenic systems. If you disagree with either of these, you will be blocked on sight. We do not welcome anti-endos and anti-nontraumagenics (A more detailed explanation of our stance here). We are also pro-tulpa and pro-nontraumagenic (p-)DID/OSDD systems.

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- Mod Reef is a multi-origins collective with DID, NPD, and ASPD, plus a whole laundry list of other disorders such as autism, schizophrenia, OCD, and AVPD. We use it/its and ze/hir pronouns collectively and exclusively, and will not talk about our headmates. We also wish to not be called a system, and rather we be called either a collective or a constellate. Feel free to ask if you'd like to know why. We're physically disabled and use forearm crutches and a wheelchair.

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@romo-aro-culture-is @ndcultureis @plural-culture-is @adhd-culture-is @autistic-culture-is @ocd-culture-is @disabled-culture-is

[oyedeng]

Loki 1x04 Spoilers

Preface: I don't even really go here for shipping, and I have no strong feelings one way or another, but y'all are being really horrible right now, and it's impossible to go into the tag for a character I really enjoy and just have content for that character, or talk to people about plot developments, character revelations, *anything*, because everyone's just vomiting their shit into those tags... So I'm gonna piss a lot of you off right now, but I need to get this off my chest, and you're always welcome to block and/or unfollow...

Biphobia: By and large, most of y'all are just biphobic as fuck. And I know this because I've seen the posts going 'What was the point of making Loki bisexual if you don't give him a male love interest' and 'If they don't give him a male love interest, they should just not give him any love interest'. You're transparent, you're gross. This is unrelated to Sylvie/Loki, because the complaint here isn't related or limited to Sylvie, but purely about a male vs female love interest regardless of other factors. Note how no one cares about Sylvie, or shipping her with anyone, it's purely about Loki. I've been in fandoms long enough to know that most of y'all don't care about actual representation - you care whether or not your white fave kisses another (white) boy. None of you give a shit about the fact that we'll get an actual gay ship in The Eternals (but that's between two poc men, so I bet many of y'all will ignore it in favour of shipping the white GoT actors together, because you're transparent af). You're pressed because the first canon on-screen representation doesn't happen on your terms in the exact conditions you've set. Let me be clear: Bisexuals do not owe the gay or lesbian community same-sex relationships in order to be valid, and it's so insanely, stupidly hurtful to be reminded once again that we'll never be queer enough for queer spaces. A bisexual person dating anyone regardless of gender or sexual identity, is in a queer relationship. Full stop.

Sylvie/Loki: It's not incest, y'all. I understand not shipping it, not vibing with it, etc etc, but it's not incest, and I'm gonna need you to stop pretend that it's gross when it's not. It's not even really purely selfcest. They're not the same person. Variants are not all necessarily the same person from different points in time, like skinny Steve vs Serum Steve or Infinity War Loki vs D+ Show Loki would be. Sylvie and Loki are more like Tobey Maguire's Peter Parker vs Tom Holland's Peter Parker - different people who occupy the same role in the narrative of the universe, not all of whom make the cut. For all we know, Sylvie's Frigga, Odin and Thor are different, too. The Loki Variants in the post-credits and in the trailer shots prove that further - we have other female presenting Lokis there, two black Lokis, at least one east asian Loki... they're not all the same person. That's why the question is "What makes a Loki a Loki" and not "What makes us us/What makes you you?". They occupied the same role up until their nexus event, that's all.

Let me break this down for you: Thor + Hela = Incest Thor + Loki = Not Incest by blood, but they grew up thinking themselves siblings so YMMV on the levels of incestuous here (it squicks me out personally, but there's no blood relation.) IW Loki + D+ Loki = Selfcest, since they're the same person from different points in time. Selfcest isn't Incest - it's a fictional concept. Sylvie + Loki = None of the above. They're different people who play the same role in the universe. And even if you do consider it Selfcest - see above. It's still not Incest.

Also hello MCU fandom, Comics Bucky had a Threesome involving a version of himself, Deadpool is all about that stuff, the mythology Loki is based on has weirder shit. Please sit down and take a breath.

I fully understand not liking the ship for any reason including if it reads platonic to you instead of romantic, but stop trying to make purity discourse happen when the ship isn't incestuous.

Learn to tag your shit: Oh my god this is my biggest pet peeve right now. I just wanted to go into the Sylvie tag to find people talking about what we learned about her character, I wanted to find out what people make of her and Loki (regardless of whether you find them platonic or romantic), if anyone ships her with B15 like I do, to find gifs etc. I did not need to see all of you fail to grasp what incest is in her character tag, and I did not need to see you crying about Lokius in the Sylvia tag either. I'm sorry that your ship didn't go canon this episode, and I wanna tell you not to worry, we don't know if he's dead, it could still happen, and even if it doesn't, you can still ship it, but I've lost all patience because it's not about shipping wars, it's about being unable to engage with any show related content right now without being flooded with bad takes, rampant biphobia, discourse and drama. Screw this fandom. I just wanted to enjoy the bonkers story and awesome new characters.

Learn to curate your experience: And finally, if you don't like it, don't go there. Block the ship tag, it's as easy as that. Stop posting your salt into main tags. Let people enjoy what they enjoy. None of this is harmful, none of this is what you're trying to cry into existence,

[mcwriting]

His Mobius

Lol y'all gonna hate me for this one but what can I say, I'm obsessed with this ship and slightly disappointed in the season finale.

Not my normal jam so sorry to those who only follow me for T. Holland content

Picks up where ep 6 leaves off. Don't read if you don't wanna get spoiled lol.

Ship: Loki vs. Mobius M. Mobius (one-sided)

Word Count: 1212

Warnings: it's sad boi hours in here y'all prepare to have your heart ripped out for a second; also spoilers

⏰

The color had drained from Loki's face as he realized what was going on when he stared at the giant statue of He Who Remains.

With the intense branching of timelines, Sylvie had kicked him into a random, newly-born universe.

He turned back to the man he knew-

No. He didn't know this man.

This was Mobius. M. Mobius, but not his Mobius. M. Mobius.

"I... I- I- I need a tempad, please," Loki begged the not-his-Mobius.

"Don't you have one? Wait- I'm sorry, who are you again? You never answered my question," not-Mobius said with growing suspicion.

He didn't know this Loki, or seem to know any Lokis at all, but he still knew to question guys who came up asking frantic questions and requesting other agents' tempads.

Loki didn't know how to answer.

For once he wanted to tell the truth, but there was no way he'd be able to explain things to this not-Mobius. He didn't have time. He needed to find his Mobius.

With a swift glance, he located not-Mobuis's tempad and with even swifter precision snatched it from the man.

"Hey wait!" he cried, but it was too late.

Loki had already punched in random numbers and opened a portal, stepping through into the unknown.

⏰

The yellow rectangle behind Loki closed as soon as he stepped through, and he knew that with all the chaos, he probably wouldn't ever be found.

As he got his bearings, Loki started to register the sights and sounds around him, along with the humid heat that made his already sweaty skin feel even stickier.

He blinked a couple times before realizing what he was looking at.

Somewhat.

He was in a rainforest.

"Midgard. This- I'm on earth," he muttered to himself, brows furrowed.

Back before the TVA, he'd spent years plotting his takeover of the planet. The Asgardian libraries had contained books filled with knowledge about earth's nature and climate systems, something he'd used to his advantage when planning where he wanted to rule from.

While he didn't know a thing about earth customs or technology, Loki could easily tell the difference between a chimpanzee and a capuchin, or explain how hibiscus flowers were great in tea.

The real question was when is he?

Loki looked at his tempad.

Manuel Antonio, Costa Rica. 2015.

It made sense. Loki remembered that the country was known for its lush landscapes.

There was no telling what universe he was in. He wondered if he could find someone to fill in in the 3 years since the battle of New York, if that had even happened in this timeline.

He took a look around. The foliage was bright green, and he spotted a toucan on a nearby branch. There was the occasional scream of a howler monkey echoing through the trees.

A few feet away, just past a few trees, was a dirt path. Signs that people had walked this trail many times.

Of course, a worry popped into the back of Loki's head that claimed a hungry jaguar had paced there as it looked for a meal, trampling the grass in search of prey.

His fears were quelled, however, when he heard faint voices nearing.

He stepped behind a wide tree and watched carefully as a man in a neon shirt led a family down the trail.

Loki spotted 5 kids, who all looked between the ages of 8 and 18. Interspersed among them were 4 adults who looked to be in their 40s or 50s.

At the back of the pack walked two older men. A shorter guy with snow white hair who looked to be in his 70s, and a taller one whose hair was very much salt-and-peppered, likely in his 60s.

The brightly-clothed guide was explaining to them all of the wonderful things Costa Rica had to offer, from its diverse flora and fauna to the beaches, mountains, and rainforests.

Loki was about to pop out from the wood and ask if this family could explain what the avengers were up to, or if they even existed at all here. He knew he would look ridiculous with his torn up TVA clothes but didn't care.

Finding Mobius was more important.

Before he could call out a greeting, he stopped dead in his tracks, blood running cold.

That voice.

He knew that voice anywhere.

The shorter old guy had cut in to make a joke to his family.

"I need to know where to get a jet ski around here."

Mobius.

That was him, but what was he doing here?

Loki felt weird seeing what it would have looked like for his Mobius to live on earth up to this point, assuming that the TVA variants of him had been plucked from the mid-1990s.

"Daaaad," one of the middle aged women groaned.

He has a daughter. Are those his grandchildren?

"You know we brought you on vacation to get you away from your jet ski, right dad?" another of the middle-agers said, a man who looked to be the youngest in his generation group.

A son as well?

"I'll have you know that the jet ski was the greatest invention of our time, of all history, even!" old-Mobius explained light-heartedly.

The taller man next to him placed a hand on his shoulder.

"I think we can manage a week without, my dear."

Loki gasped.

That was him speaking to old-Mobius. Well, not him, but an old version of him.

It didn't make sense.

Loki was well over 1000 years old. An Asgardian diety. A jotun.

He wouldn't just age like that. Not unless he sacrificed something to do so.

Loki couldn't help but notice, though, that while old-Loki's face was considerably wrinklier than his own, the man he looked at was void of worry lines around his eyes and forehead.

He looked genuinely happy.

Loki shifted as best he could to stay hidden behind the tree as he watched what played out ahead of him.

"Oh, alright, alright. I guess I can manage going without ole Lightning for the week if it means I've got y'all to entertain me. But just know that I'm taking everyone out on the lake as soon as we get back to Texas."

Old-Mobius, or whatever his midgardian name really was, smiled at his old-Loki, placing an hand over his lower back.

"I think that can be arranged," old-Loki agreed, quickly pressing a kiss to old-Mobius's temple as he wrapped an arm over the shorter man's shoulders.

Loki didn't even realize that there were tears sliding down his cheeks until the pang in his heart made him turn away from the happy family.

Because it wasn't just Mobius's family, it was his.

He didn't know how the two had found each other, how this Loki had somehow evaded godhood to live a domestic, midgardian life.

Loki couldn't stay here. He couldn't disturb and be caught by them.

He needed to find his Mobius, maybe figure out how to start a life like that.

It wouldn't be easy, jumping through the multiverse searching for that hard-headed, sarcastic, witty, crazy TVA analyst Loki had somehow fallen for, but he had to try.

So with the coast clear, he reset the tempad and stepped through another portal.

For his Mobius.

⏰

A/N: my heart is going to explode. Why did I feel the need to torture myself in this way? Anyways, I wrote it, so y'all gotta read it.

I don't make the rules.

Let me know what you thought! I love and hate this simultaneously so I'd love some feedback. Thanks for reading!!

Once again, sorry for those who follow me for Tom Holland stuff but I really wanted to write this!

If you would like to be added to any of my taglists, please message or send an ask so I can verify that you've been added!

Not tagging my permanent tag list since this isn't my normal content!

[momotimes]

//LOKI EP 6 SPOILERS, SYLKI, LOKIUS, GENERAL DISCUSSION OF LOKI SHIPS, MENTIONS OF INCEST

sylki antis and lokius antis out there, please don't come for me. i am saying this from neutral ground, with as least bias as possible, as i myself am a lokius shipper. i apologize for any kind of negativity you read, i'm just really tired of seeing anti sylki and anti lokius posts filling the loki tag. i worked up a lot of courage to post this and i'm hoping there won't be any negativity towards it.

ok so episode six itself, despite what i have been seeing on tumblr, was honestly not that bad. the series, in my opinion, is a nice gateway into phase four and multiverse madness. it provides explanation about the multiverse, as much as that explanation has a couple of plot holes. we see a lot of character development in loki, especially the way he denied wanting the throne at the end, before sylvie's betrayal. loki went from wanting to rule the world to being willing to actually give up power. that's a huge leap for a character like him.

the only problem i really have with the finale is sylki. and the only problem i have with SYLKI is that it's pseudo-incest.

to clarify, i do not HATE sylki. i'm only uncomfortable with it. in fact, if things had been different, it would probably have been one of my otps. the banter that loki and sylvie share are great, and they both needed a person to support them through their trauma.

however, loki and sylvie, being variants of each other, have enough biological similarity that they could, at the very least, be siblings. THAT is the problem i have with the ship. not the fact that it's a straight relationship, though we'll get to that soon, but the fact that it's practically incest. many people that feel uncomfortable with sylki, i myself included, would be perfectly fine with the ship if sylvie was a different person, and not a loki variant.

as for the people out there saying that it's a perfect way to have loki love himself, that could have easily been achieved with sylvie and loki being PLATONICALLY in love with each other. nothing would have been taken away from the whole "loki's self-love journey" plot. and for the people saying that it's in character, it's really not. a lot of people use narcissism as a coping mechanism for self-hate- i would know, i do it often- and so does loki. loki uses illusions to hide his brokenness, like the scene in which he's in prison in asgard and he uses an illusion to hide his dirty state from thor. he doesn't actually love himself that much- he's gone through so much for that.

another slight discomfort i have with sylki is that marvel seems to create a romance between a man and a woman if they share any sort of screen time. i saw another post compare sylki with steve and sharon, which in my opinion, is perfect. steve and sharon as a pairing was unexpected and sort of gross, seeing as sharon is peggy's niece. they gave us almost no buildup to the kiss, either. but marvel made them kiss, merely because steve was a man and sharon was a woman.

this isn't really a discomfort or a problem i have with sylki, but marvel really did their representation poorly. loki was male presenting for the entire show, and sylvie was female presenting for the entire show. when faced with the possibility of a female version of themselves, the loki variants in the void were disgusted. that's not genderfluid representation. and marvel could have at least explored loki's bisexuality a little bit before the sylki kiss, rather then jump straight to it. this is queerbaiting on an entirely different level.

but that's enough about sylki- let's talk about lokius.

lokius, as a ship, has its merits. loki and mobius grow very close throughout the show, and their banter is just as witty and amusing as sylvie and loki's. i love this ship, and it's one of my comfort ships.

but lokius shippers and sylki antis alike are taking sylvie hate a little far. sylvie is a great character, and she has so many layers of complex emotional trauma from the years running from the tva. her not trusting he who remains(i think that was his title, i'm not calling him kang just yet) is completely in character- and also a defense mechanism. she's automatically suspicious of anyone because she's seen what people can do. you can't blame her for that.

i've also seen posts about how people just want a healthy platonic relationship between two characters for once without people shipping them, which i agree with- there are so little healthy friendships in the media, especially between men, that aren't shipped together. however, i do feel like there are reasons for that, which i could write a whole separate, long-ass post about, but won't cause this is not the place.

side note- i will not tolerate people who hate on sylki purely because it's not mlm like lokius therefore they can't sexualize it like lokius. y'all are nasty and need to reconsider things.

in any case, both sides of this ship war have things they need to consider about the people they're shipping, the ship they're supporting, and the things they're saying/actions they're taking to express their support for that ship. no one side is without fault.

hopefully this made sense, because i'm not going back to revise anything- my brain actually won't let me revise. if i write something, that's it, there's no fixing it unless i want to delete everything. so bear with me if nothing made sense :)

[greymantledlady]

I posted 2,087 times in 2021

69 posts created (3%)

2018 posts reblogged (97%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 29.2 posts.

I added 2,890 tags in 2021

#q - 801 posts

#loki - 510 posts

#lokius - 400 posts

#supernatural - 281 posts

#fanart - 235 posts

#midam - 173 posts

#art - 149 posts

#mobius - 143 posts

#animals - 100 posts

#loki spoilers - 98 posts

Longest Tag: 130 characters

#manifesting manifesting manifesting 🕯️🕯️🕯️ that loki will be the one to tenderly hold mobius's face and bring back his memories

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

Every day. every day! i come onto tumblr and block a new person with a bad take on mobius and an uwu loki did nothing wrong poor little meow meow complex. y'all are SO annoyingly putting your shit-tier takes in the lokius tag so for the LAST time:

mobius is essentially a fucking brainwashed cult member when we meet him. brainwashed in the most literal sense.

he has a job to do. the job is interrogate loki for info.

if he doesn't do the job loki gets FUCKING PRUNED

he saves loki

he does the job

he does it as kindly and gently as he possibly can under the circumstances

despite the brainwashing he shows loki warmth and compassion and humanity when literally every single other person in the TVA treats variants as subhuman

loki is a mass-murderer who tried to commit genocide on the jotuns. he ripped out a guy's eyeball and smiled while he did it. he's genuinely a bad and dangerous person at the start of the show. regardless of his sympathetic backstory, he's done a fuck ton of harm and hurt a lot of people.

if mobius doesn't get through to him loki gets pruned

if mobius doesn't get through to him more minutemen die

mobius does what he needs to do to get through to loki by confronting him with the awful stuff he's done. he shows loki the consequences of his own actions. and he does it with compassion and as much gentleness as he can possibly show without making excuses for him

reiterating that mobius is BRAINWASHED at the time

the reverent way he talks about the timekeepers? brainwashed. the utter assurance in his voice as he tells loki about what he believes? brainwashed. 'untangling the infinite branches of the epilogue' that's something he learned by rote. brainwashed.

source: i grew up in a cult

in conclusion if u talk shit about mobius then get blocked

thank you for coming to my ted talk

tes • Posted 2021-08-01 00:56:25 GMT

#4

Okay but his little laugh here is SO telling. Dean's like 'he lets you be?!' and Adam's like. 'Uuuhhhhh. Dude. of course my husband lets me be, wtf else would he do'

like he thinks it's FUNNY! and absurd, the thought that Michael would not let him talk or be. This man has one (1) extremely whipped archangel husband who is SO indulgent and looks after him SO well and Adam is just. happy and glad to have an archangel inside of him who lets him eat exactly how many burgers he wants and also wraps him up safe inside to protect him the instant that a threat arises, he's HAPPY with this arrangement

318 notes • Posted 2021-05-28 00:01:29 GMT

#3

genuinely feel so creeped out when straight ship people come and attack the gay ship people, calling them delusional, laughing at them for being excited and hopeful, saying oh, you lost the ship war and we won... like yeah, no shit? So completely shocking, right, that your straight ship went canon and our gay one didn't. None of us anticipated that. /s

Like yes, gay shippers might be in the clear majority here on tumblr, but don't act like this is in any way a fair fight. It's not a 'ship war', it's more like a fucking resistance movement. You have all the power of heteronormativity on your side, of fucking course your ship went canon and ours didn't.

593 notes • Posted 2021-07-14 23:23:07 GMT

#2

Mobius says 'thanks for the spark' and Loki BLUSHES and LOOKS DOWN SHYLY and SUCKS HIS LIP sjdkfkflkdl what is this I'm going insane send help YEAH YOU BET THEY HAD A SPARK

744 notes • Posted 2021-07-07 10:11:04 GMT

#1

Honestly if Marvel thinks that Loki, canon bisexual and THE daddy issues posterboy, wouldn't be desperately, stupidly attracted to Agent Mobius M Mobius with his undeniably strong DILF energy... well. then they are simply incorrect.

2796 notes • Posted 2021-07-06 15:26:05 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

[nehswritesstuffs]

A bit of an odd question, but in one of your older fics there's a tag that mentioned your Oma has nasi goering for dinner. Are you Dutch, by any chance? (sorry if this is too private)

First off, thank you, Greyscale, for not asking me if I was German... or Belgian... or Danish... because that's what 98% of people ask me and it's slightly infuriating, which makes this question a delight.

It probably is a bit too private, but you just gave me a chance to talk about my oma's nasi, which I don't get to often enough.

Lots of overexplaining and rambling under the cut.

Yes! My mom's family is very, very Dutch (I get Scots and All-American Mutt from Dad's side, but that's a different story) and with it comes a bunch of food that I ate growing up--and still do--that aren't quite in the Anglospheric American mainstream. Stamppot? Yes. Worstebroodtjen? Yes. Olliebollen? Yes. Stroopwafels? Maybe if y'all can pronounce 'em correctly. All things that seem kinda "okay yeah sure not too foreign i guess" to a lot of my local peers (to name a few), but then...

...out of nowhere...

...with no way to concisely describe it...

...nasi.

My oma's nasi goering is hella weird, even by nasi standards. For those who have been kinda skimming until now because wtf is this, there is no real one recipe for nasi goering. It's just basically "fried rice" in Indonesia, which was where the Dutch had a colony for quite a few years. Like barbecue in the United States and pasta in Italy and any other "signature" meal, there's regional variants with all of them claiming to be the best. The colonial food exchange that took place, however, meant that the rijsttafel (rice table; Indonesian/[South]East Asian meals) ended up becoming part of modern-day mainstream Dutch diets. My oma's nasi, on the other hand, is probably unlike anything you'll find in a modern rijsttafel, on either side of the exchange. Why? A variety of reasons, but mostly one thing and one thing only:

...peanut butter.

Now why peanut butter? I have no freaking clue, because she learned how to make it from someone else back in the 1950s, before she immigrated, but I get the feeling that American-style peanut butter was a staple to it back then already. I mean, it was the 1950s and something very American. Then after she and Opa and Mom came over in the 1960s, she adjusted the recipe for what she could find here at the time. AND THEN she gradually adjusted as things became either less available or suddenly more available. There used to be a fairly tight-knit Dutch immigrant community where I'm from, but most of that has sort of died out. We went from [supposedly, mind] a truck with import goods on it that could visit customers door-to-door to the best place to get specifically-Dutch imports being a three hour drive to the other side of the state. It's worth the drive, and we end up stocking ourselves like insane doomsday-preppers, but it's worth it. Sometimes we have to adjust based on what that one specific import store carries, but hey, whatever.

Anyhow, oma's nasi. You can't call it a curry because there's no curry in it. I guess the closest thing is a peanut-pork sauce over seasoned rice, but that doesn't do it any justice. Is it just a couple of Conimex ingredients along with some things that probably shouldn't be added to the mix but are anyhow? Yeah. Is it just enough of a pain in the butt to make to not want it constantly? Kinda. Is it still delicious as fuck? You betcha.

I mean, just look at it. It's delicious.

So yes. We're Very Fucking Dutch, to the point where I grew up hearing the word dalek as something completely separate from Doctor Who and ate candy sandwiches and now go on food-based pilgrimages because more local stores won't stock the good shit anymore though you can find an increasingly-large supply of stroopwafels in many grocery stores since there was a McFlurry with those a while back. My nasi and your nasi probably are both very, very different from one another, but that's okay, because it's supposed to be by design.

[iimmcrtalis-archive]

Biography:

     A life begins when you first take a breath, they say. You take a breath, and scream life into the world. You mark the world with your voice and then,  you slowly quiet.

  Sometimes, however, you do not make your mark till later. You didn't cry when you were born, and you aren't crying now. But the world can feel you crawling back. Clawing, etching, your name into the spine of everyone regardless if they know you are not. It is not because of who you are. But what you've done; Survived death for six months.

   This is how she came to be. No memory of who she was. That was the deal. No memories of who she had been. Only of what made her. Dying. Death. Life a new. Death would follow her, threaded through her bones. Threaded through the scar on her throat, knitting together her organs and the wound that let them spill. She would never truly be alive again.

  The snow melted. Hands bloodied. Clothes stained and torn to shreds. She was a corpse walking. Wandering. Lost. But a woman, Eludysia, found her. She spoke with confidence, like a woman that knew everything. Took her away, to the other side of the country. A Grandmother she never knew, apparently. A mentor that would help her truly deal with her magic. But first, they would have to work through how death stuck to her. Work through the questions that rose as she fell into memories of what happened reached her. But that would be years. Years of self destruction. Years that she struggled to think beyond what she had become. A heavy thing to process, until she had a heartbeat. And then she breathed. And the world shifted.

  Nearly dying again had struck fear into her chest. A flash of bleeding, bloodied, lost. A memory replaying in her head shook her to her core. Near death experiences tend to do that, of course. Make you crave life. It turned her around, guided her back to living to live instead of exist.

  She sought after knowledge, and power. Made a web of people she knew, connected over things she had interest in. Plays the role her grandmother hoped her to. Not a pawn, not truly. But as her right hand. The Heir to being a Watcher. Meant the world was her playground and she'd have to explore it at the behest of Eludysia.

So she does.

  She travels, place to place. Under the guise of it being a teaching job, or studying plants and what not. Good thing, her doctorate, covers for a lot

.Stats:

Name: Revas Ramsey Nicknames: Vas, Little Witch, Witchy Bitch. Titles: Death Seer Age: 27 Birthday:March 19th Gender: DMAB. Trans-Woman. She/Her pronouns only. Sexuality: Pansexual │ demiromantic Birthplace: Unknown. Residence: California Relatives:                 Eludysia Ramsey [ Grandmother ] (alive)                 Jacob Feldt [ Father ] ( Alive )                 Rani Feldt  [ mother ] ( Alive )                 Miriam Feldt [ sister ] ( alive )                 Jacob Feldt Jr [ brother ] ( alive )

Height: 5'2" Weight: 140lbs Character’s body build: Curved, muscular. Eye Color: Emerald green. Hair Color: Dark red. Type of hair: Very thick. Hairstyle: Usually in a long braid or high tight ponytail. Hair down will go past her calves.  Complexion and skin tone: Freckled & light brown Scars: Multiple facial scars. Deep scar across her throat. Mannerisms: Revas used to stumble a bit while she was nervous. Now she speaks very cooly, and tends to have her arms crossed; a sign of being closed off. Usual Body Posture: Warm. Usually bouncing or inviting to others. Or cold and shut off. Tattoos:

Black work wings on her back

Hebrew for Freedom on her wrist.

Galaxy sleeves.

Class/race: Witch. Half-fae.

Powers & Abilities:

MAGIC:

Offensive Magic:

Magic Attacks

Magic Combat

Power Absorption

Defensive Magic:

Force-Field Generation

Healing Magical

Energy Absorption

Miscellaneous Abilities

Elemental Manipulation

Flight

Magic Aura

Magic Detection

Magic Generation

Magical Constructs

Magical Energy Manipulation

Magically Enhanced Physiology

Personal Domain

Potion Creation - for various purposes (i.e. explosive, healing)

Shapeshifting

Spell Casting        • Spell Amplification        • Spell Creation        • Spell Destabilization        • Spell Mixture        • Spell Negation

Summoning/Banishment

Enchanting

Telekinesis

Telepathy

Teleportation

Transmutation

SEER:

Precognition:  perceive future events before they happen

Retrocognition: to discern events of the past

Death Sense: To detect who was going to die and when their death will occur, but may not be able to prevent it.

Divination: Gain insight of future events by the use of occult ritual.

Clairvoyance:  gain a direct visual information about an object, person, location or physical event through means other than the user's physical sight and allows them to act when they are unable to use their eyes and allows them to hear things at distances.    can sense/see/hear spiritual/psychic beings and other person's presence and perceive emotions, thoughts and memories of others. Some users can project themselves onto the spiritual world.

Empathic: To receive precognitive flashes of the future when exposed to extreme emotion.

Flash: To see things seconds or minutes before they happen.

Dreaming: To perceive future in dreams, whether symbolic, direct or from the perspective of another being.           • Can also alter and manipulate the dreams of others. Usually has       to be in close proximity to the other person ( same house will work best. ) 

Dream Scrying: to dream actual ongoing far-off events.

Psychic Navigation: to locate people/objects or create a mental map of an area.

Psychometry: to perceive the residual information of an object and/or person. This ability isn’t one of her major ones, thus it’s usually only when she focuses on an object/person. 

Shared Vision: to view another user of clairvoyance sight.

Visual Linking: to link one’s vision to others.

VERSES:

Teen: Tag    Takes place between the age of 14 to 18. Mostly your standard highschool au yo.

College: Tag    19 to 26. Standard college au dude. College buds. Hell ye. Watch my girl earn her doctorate.

Future: Tag   45 to whatever age. She's pretty much immortal y'all. Ngl here. So your muse future shit? Older revas time.

Inquisition Related:

    •  Companion: Post │ Tag     Left clan Lavellan at 12. Became a first for another clan. Murdered two people. Left that clan. Became a traveling Keeper. Hung out in Kirkwall for awhile. Went back to being a keeper for a while. Then ya know. Sky explodes. 

  • Advisor: Tag        Instead of a companion the Inquisitor can make her an advisor. She acts more as an ambassador for the dalish and often consults with the mages so their voices have a say in how shit goes. Shit stays relatively the same. just more stress :))

  •    Inquisitor: Post │ Tag   Sort of the same deal. But instead of just leaving for another clan bc too many mages, she used blood magic to try and keep her parents alive post a darkspawn attack. Then all the other shit happened. In Trespasser she's no longer a devotee to Mythal but to Falon'din. 

  • Grey Warden:  Post │ Page │ Codex       Tag ( awakening ) │ Tag ( da2 & dai ) │ Suledin Tag │ Rosal’nan tag   After killing two clan members, she travels Fereldan for three years. After the Blight she joins the wardens. Variants are based on the Wardens choices made by her. Or default if no choices are made.

  •   Specific Talen ( svcraficed ) Warden AU: Tag │ Shora Tag  Plucked outta the woods, half dead and injured, the Warden took her under his wing. Finding him a part of her new family, she takes the name Shora. 

  • Commander  of The Inquisition Forces AU: Tag          Based on a dire need with @desiderrium‘s Cullen to have him actually fucking not be in charge so Revas takes his place. Why is she qualified, you might ask. Well, for the same reason people say that Merrill is. She’s lead people and is trained to lead people, to command and protect her people. Also she’s like. strong as heck so. why not. 

DC: Post │ Tag     What do you do after you've been murdered but aren't dead dead? Ya get the fuck outta dodge. Except it leaves an impact. So you become a goddamn vigilante.             • Side AU: Blue Lantern verse where Revas is chosen to be a blue Lantern.

Fallout: Post │ Tag    Primarily between Fallout 3, NV & 4.       • Standard: Revas is a former Courser turned Gunner, turned Mercenary. Her age is unknown. Her Identity as a Synth even more so. She travels with Faron, a sniper.        • Other one: Instead of being a synth, she's a Psyker with seer abilities & telepathy.

Overwatch: Post │ Tag    All I know is that she died. Got really fucked up. I'm thinking Nanobots to control plants & shit ya know. We'll see I think. Just know shes dead. Dead ish. Like genji “””dead” but also Reaper dead. Cybernetic nanobot cloud of fuck you. Tho she's melee af yo.

Mass Effect Trilogy:  Post │ Tag    Still debating if Revas is gonna be a Quarian or just a Jewish woman from Earth. Who knows. Probably human bc its easier lbh. Powerful af Biotic human who's a badass merc w/ her pal Faron. Y'all catching a pattern?

Mass Effect: Andromeda: Post │ Tag   Human Biotic. Came to Andromeda because she wanted to get away from bad shit. She studied botany and agriculture so ya know early release to help with food but. She sided against the Initiative and fucked off to Kadara.

Elder Scrolls: Post │ Tag   Wood elf magic user who is sort of a cannibal and eats general kills. Because religious reasons. Stumbles into Skyrim w/ Faron bc she wants to travel and help her people everywhere.

The Raven Cycle:  Post │ Tag      Crossover with her normal verse. Revas works at Aglionby Academy as a history teacher. Her involvement in the series is up to You. 

Murder Mom:  Post  │ Tag        The verse post is Graphic. Tw for abuse ( childhood sexual abuse ), rape implied, murder, violence, death, & murder.      A Modern Conversion of her Inquisitor verse. Revas’s parents are murdered when she’s twelve. She gets taken in by an abusive family that sort of planned it all. Ends up murdered. Comes back and fucks their shit up. She’s an extremely powerful witch in this AU, as well as a CEO of her grandmothers company. She’s not afraid to kill. 

No Death: Tag     Based on this drabble. Not extremely explicit but does have mentions & implications of abuse, sexual abuse, trauma, depression, suicidal thoughts, suicide attempted, cancer, & family death.        In this AU, it’s a case of if Revas didn’t die at all. Instead of dying, her magic lashed out and killed her attackers. & she forced herself to stay alive because of hope and wanting to. Her magic sort of hit an awoken state that gave her high abilities in healing magic, usually on herself. Thus keeping her alive even when the guilt from murder got too much. In her early 20′s and late teen years, her parents passed away and she was left with her younger siblings, twin toddlers. Took a deal with a shady grandmother for money & immortality, mainly the money. & now still lives in a brownstone in New York, studying history working two jobs & trying to be a good mom for her siblings. 

TAGS

general • about • isms • face • aesthetics • abilities • ic 

[bailey-girl-99]

Tag game!

I was tagged by @maverick-werewolf ! How fun!

1. Why did you choose your url?

My url is based on my usernames for pretty much everything. I always try to have a variant of "baileygirl99" when I make accounts. It's cute I think! And I like having my name in it.

2. Any side blogs?

Nope! I used to have a roleplaying sideblog, but it died quickly.

3. How long have you been on tumblr?

Since late 2013, I'm pretty sure? I couldn't find where it says the actual month/year. Either late 2013 or early 2014!

4. Do you have a queue tag?

Nope! I'm...not 100% sure what that is 😅

5. Why did you start your blog in the first place?

My friend from freshman year of high school had one, and she really wanted me to get one. So I did, and I'm glad.

6. Why did you choose your icon/pfp?

My icon is from The Originals, the first spinoff of The Vampire Diaries. It takes place in New Orleans, so that's why there's a fleur de lis. I LOVED that show, it is SO GOOD. It was much better than TVD, imo. Aaaaaalso, I am a francophile, so having a French AND vampire icon is just perfect to me, haha.

7. Why did you choose your header?

When Assassin's Creed: Odyssey came out, Ubisoft released a bunch of cool header and laptop home screens and stuff that we could download. I liked AC Odyssey, even though it wasn't an assassin game, and I really loved playing as Kassandra. Also, I love the bright colors and such in the picture. It's so pretty and neat! And it also shows anyone who sees it something that I like.

8. What's your post with the most notes?

I very very rarely write my own posts 😵. Idk how to find my one with the most notes, but it probably has, like, 3 notes lol.

9. How many mutuals do you have?

I have a couple, if I understand the term correctly. I love interacting with some people on this site, so I have a few people that I interact with often. I also know some people on here irl!

10. How many followers do you have?

I have 86 followers, and the porn bit population has been uncontrollable lately.

11. How many people do you follow?

I actually follow 69 blogs (nice). I get overwhelmed when I follow too many blogs, bc for some reason I feel the need to look through EVERY new post on my dash, every single time I open tumblr.

12. Have you ever made a shitpost?

No. At least, I don't think so...

13. How often do you use Tumblr each day?

This varies a LOT. If I'm busy (which I usually am), I'll go on once, maybe twice a week. If I find more free time, then I can go on once or twice a day, or less. It really varies.

14. Have you ever had an argument/disagreement with another blog?

No. I hope I don't get into one!

15. How do you feel about the "you need to reblog this" posts?

I'm not a huge fan. They oftentimes have very hard-hitting and important information that I honestly would rather just read and move on. But I feel really bad when it's social issues and stuff, bc then I might seem insensitive if I don't reblog. And that is how I DON'T want my followers to feel.

16. Do you like tag games?

Sure! Not too many, but I like doing them!

17. Do you like ask games?

Yeah! I mostly like being the one to ask 👀

18. Which of your mutuals do you think is Tumblr famous?

Idk, maybe maverick-werewolf is the most famous one. They have super cool posts 😎

19. Do you have a crush on a mutual?

Nope!

This tag game was super fun! I hope y'all will like it: @doctorjoshua and @verwing (you def don't have to do it if you don't wanna!)