#so like. what if that but its brian

[mothocean]

You think when the mechs play hangman they add brians lil hat n hair to the stick figure

[puppyeared]

id fumble him so bad

[st4rstudent]

bugthinker but I just did whatever to him

bonus slop

[wannabemylover]

rewatching the first episode of Hannibal and holy shit I forgot how good this is but it's actually insane that Brian fuller set up the ep like this, he introduces will and Hannibal by first briefly showing them at their core, at the darkest, most vile part of them---we get a glimpse behind the curtain---and then its gone, the curtain is snapped shut and we see their masks, their human suits.

Will empathizes with killers because he likes it, and he wants to kill but he refuses to give into the urge because he knows how much he'll like it and he won't be able to stop. So he lives vicariously through other killers, satisfying his own dark urge by feeding it little morsels of secondhand blood lust. Every crime scene he works gives the urge something that satisfies it, not enough for it to grow, but enough for it be sate. Enough that he can ignore it for long enough that he can walk around and be Professor Will Graham who is Weird, Brash, and Non-sociable.

And Hannibal is a cannibal at night and a psychiatrist by morning.

[mellotronmkll]

GOD there is nothing more frustrating than being like oh Yay there's a guitar tutorial for this song I want to figure out how to play and watching it and it's just like completely inaccurate . Like nevermind then

[mullermoment]

does this parallel make sense to ANYBODY but me. am i alone in this. it's ok if i am

[stewies-inactive-account]

[askgunpowdertim]

They're so pretty, I can't- Yeah. Yeah. Can you see what I have to deal with here? I'm so fucking gay.

[based on that one time jonny made brian a dress :-)]

[majorshatterandhare]

GPTim having both visual and hearing disabilities is so important to me. That man’s eyes were *burned out* when he *exploded the moon* his hearing is gonna be affected also; and having functional accessibility aids (his mechanical eyes, here) does not equal not disabled, it just means that the disability manifests differently.

[baggidude]

So what if it turns out symbiotes can survive on MALE JUICES so to keep the killing rate low Eddie becomes a manwhore? Like its not as good as brains but it MUCH better than what chocolate does.

[mariocki]

The Long Good Friday (1980)

"Alan found him dying. He'd been nailed to the floor."

"When was this, then?"

"Well, it must've been just after you saw him and just before Alan saw him. Otherwise, you'd have noticed, wouldn't you? I mean, a geezer nailed to the floor. A man of your education would definitely have spotted that, wouldn't he?"

[squarebracketsmileyface]

I don't know how to explain it, but The View Between Villages by Noah Kahan is just making me cry so much because I'm thinking about it from like, the perspective of Tim in the Crossroads fic I have planned for ages in the future. Like, Tim looking at the burned out shell of his old house and just, feeling so many things. He's gone back there one last time before he's moving away for good and he's got Birdie in her baby carrier in the back seat and Tim's just so angry at everything that happened to him. He lost Jay, he killed Alex, he lost Brian and he's just so fucking angry because none of this should have happened and it's all his fault.

All he's got left is Birdie, his baby girl who he constantly feels guilty over because he didn't even know he was pregnant while the final confrontation with Alex happened. He could have lost her too, before he even knew he had her and he's so glad that didn't happen, but he's still ridiculously guilty over the fact that it could have happened. He wasn't careful enough. He explained away any symptoms of pregnancy he might have had, because why wouldn't he?

Mood swings and hormones going crazy? Well he'd been coming off T because he just couldn't fucking get it, like the rest of his meds by the end, and the Operator sickness caused all kinds of crazy emotional swings and stuff like that anyway.

Feeling ill? Very easily caused by the Operator.

Everything could be explained away because god knows he didn't want to be pregnant, he and Jay were nowhere near in the right place to be parents. And they'd been pretty damn careful about using protection and all that so why would he even worry? Sure the thought crossed his mind, but it was just an intrusive thought and he knew how to not let those control him.

But now he's got a one month old in a baby seat in the back of his car and he's looking at the house he could have raised her in, the house he could have raised her in with Jay and he's so fucking angry. There's nothing he can do except hold it together when he goes to meet up with Jessica one last time, to say goodbye to this part of his life one last time before he drives out of the state to the new, tiny apartment he got for himself so he has somewhere he can actually raise his kid.

He lost everything here, and he loves Birdie, he loves his kid, but right now he'd trade anything to have Jay back, to have another chance at all of this, a chance to get through it all with Jay still alive and Brian still alive, and even Alex still alive, including her. Because yes he loves her, she's all he really has left of Jay, but currently the grief is fucking immense and one second he's fine and the next he can barely look at her because got she looks so much like Jay, even as tiny as she is.

He loves her, he adores her, but her being born five months after he lost everyone, lost Jay, just set him so far back in his grief and he didn't have a clue how to cope with it. Sure, he chose to keep her, he made that decision for himself, but that didn't make it any easier when he actually had to go through with it.

He's just so fucking angry. He feels like he'll never stop being angry. He's angry at himself and at Jay and at Brian and at Alex and at Birdie. He's angry at the entire fucking world and he doesn't know how to get that to stop.

So he lies to Jessica when he sees her, tells her Jay moved, wanted to put all of this behind him, and while he lies to her he tries to lie to himself too, to pretend for a moment that it's true, that Jay just left rather than fucking dying. He says goodbye to Jessica and to this part of his life, and he gets on the road. And he comes to that crossroads. He looks in the centre mirror and sees Birdie's baby seat and one of her little hands reaching out of it, trying to grab the sleeve of one of Jay's old jumpers that somehow ended up in Tim's bag, and he just kinda breaks.

It's a good 'breaks' but he still breaks. He decides then and there that he fucking loves this baby of his, he loves her, he adores her, he's in love with having a child, she is everything to him.

He can't bring Jay back, or Brian or Alex, but he can pour all the love he had for them into this baby and he can make sure she has the best life possible. He makes his turn at that crossroad and pulls his car off the road as soon as he can after, getting out and picking her up, bundling her up in Jay's hoodie like he has so many times before and just holding her. He doesn't stop himself from crying, just holds her and rocks her and calls her "My baby, my baby" over and over again, kissing her forehead and just letting himself feel everything he's been trying to hide from for the last six months.

He's gonna give this baby everything. He'd trade his fucking life for hers. She's everything to him and that's fucking terrifying, but he's gonna make it work.

She's gonna have the best childhood he can possibly give her, they're gonna be a family and Tim will look after her because she's the last living part of Jay and she's another living part of Tim, and he has to prove to himself that he can keep her alive and safe and happy.

I don't even know if any of this makes sense I can't really see what I'm trying very well because I'm crying over this stupid fucking series/fic/characters/what the fuck ever. This song is fucking evil and I love it.

Just "It's all washing over me, I'm angry again" is just Tim every time he thinks about Jay and MH and Brian and MH and Alex and MH throughout the rest of his life. He'll never stop getting angry over everything that happened, but he'll stop being angry over it constantly. It'll be something he lets himself feel when he needs to, rather than it just consuming him constantly.

And telling Birdie about it will help him handle it. Telling Birdie about the guy he met in highschool (brian), about the friends he made and lost in and after uni (Alex, jay, Brian, seth, sarah), and the guy who found him again years later, the guy who was Birdie's other dad (Jay). He talks to her about why Jay's not in her life, talks to her about the loss and explains to her that "I'm still sad over it, I'm sad over it a lot, but I have you now and that makes it a lot easier, because I love you so much and if I still had him I don't know if I'd have had you and i could never trade you for him, even if I had the chance"

christ I need to stop writing or I'm gonna fucking dehydrate lol, fucking hell. If I'm crying this much just listening to this song and writing this, god knows how I'll survive writing the actual fic 💀

[st4rstudent]

Various other one-sided swap doodles inspired by oomfs comments

[stoleyourgender]

what if drumbot brian was magnetic. what if every mech's mechanism was magnetic. WHAT IF.

[pondslime]

ELISHA CUTHBERT AS CARLY JONES IN HOUSE OF WAX (2005)

[viscerax]

Hiiii may i get some brim angst🙏🙏

From the day Brian went missing, Tim's life went crashing down around him. Brian. Brian, his friend on the outside, secret boyfriend behind closed doors. Turns out, its not exactly easy to be openly gay when you're in the south. (Not like either of them didn't know that already. Brian grew up in the deep south. Any hint at femininity or flamboyance in a man and they were sent away to church camp where only God can save them.

But that was okay with Tim. He was okay with keeping his relationship a secret. Because Brian knew. And Brian was the only one that Tim needed to know. )

But when Brian went missing, no phone call, no text, not even a God damned note, Tim's life came crashing down. His other friends were limited to Brian's friends, and he had an itching feeling in his mind that they didn't really like 'his type'. (What did that even mean? Shy, dark, brooding, snappy at times? Could they all tell he was secretly gay? Oh god-)

Even Jay, who seemed awfully nice to Tim, someone he wouldn't mind getting to know, no, even his face fell into the blur of memories as he buzzed about his life. Pretending like it'll be okay.

(Everything is fine.)

Tim tries his best to forget about Brian. But he can't. Tim wishes those pesky memory issues would kick in and wipe that stupid smiling face out of his mind, but it won't, and he can't forget. Whether for himself or for Brian, he's not sure.

(Probably both. Because, if he forgets Brian, then he forgets that anyone's ever truly loved him. That anyone's ever seen him at his best, his worst, and even when he's not himself, and still managed to love him. If he forgets Brian, he forgets that there's anything worth living for.)

So Tim does his best. He looks and looks but he can't find him. Eventually he has to return to work, to school. He can't let life knock him out while he's already down and reeling from the loss of his closest companion. He does his best, and he prays that it's enough. Enough that Brian would be proud of him. Proud that he kept going. Proud that he never forgot him.

The days blurred. They blurred more and more. Memories become murky until he even doubts his memories of Brian. If it weren't for the countless voice-mails from Brian (that Tim saved in preparation for something exactly like this,) Tim mightve even forgotten what his voice sounded like. But no. He can't forget. He has to remember.

(...remember... remember.... memory. what a funny thing.)

And the days blur into a smoke, so much resembling the clouds of smoke he pushes past his lips, and he would laugh at the comparison, if he laughed at much of anything these days.

And then suddenly its 3 years. And Tim is celebrating Brian's birthday alone. Because he can't forget. Can't possibly forget that it's a day to be celebrated. Can't forget its significance or why its so important or why he needs to eat cake on this day. (Wait... who's birthday is it? No no, he needs to remember...)

Memories stop becoming blurry when Jay shows up. Jay feels familiar, like there's a memory of him somewhere in there, but he can't possibly make out his face besides a few faint memories of filming for that cursed film. That film that mightve been how he infected everyone. How he infected Brian and-

(No. No. He didn't infect Brian. He couldn't have. Nope. No way.)

And then suddenly Jay is leaking his medical records online, and he can't possibly care to search his memories for a sympathetic moment from him before he's punching him in the middle of a parking lot. To be fair it was kind of deserved.

The days continued to blur and merge, save for the few distinct memories he has of being with Jay. Arguing with him, late nights in hotel rooms, having conversations that would never be heard by another ear, Jay laying down his deepest confessions as if he somehow knew his fate.

Memories come flooding back like a cracked dam when he sees that audition tape from years back. He can finally remember. Remember auditioning, remember filming on hot days, watching Alex yell at everyone for far too long. But most of all, he remembers Brian. Memories coming back like hot flashes and suddenly he can't breath, not because of the intense memories, but because he's making a realization.

That was Brian. Brian was the masked man behind ToTheArk. He watched Brian die and he didn't even know. He watched one of his only friends fall to their death, and he didn't even know.

He didn't know.

But he knew now. He knew that was Brian. That same exact hoodie, and God, who else could it be?

Tim can't breath. He can't feel himself moving as he practically trips over himself and empties whatever contents left in his body into his toilet because it's all just so much.

Brian was dead. He was dead and he wasn't coming back.