#so honestly if you hand me any lgbt hc for any one of these characters im gonna like it lol

[cherubchoirs]

Can we get ultrakill pride stuff!!!! Shakes you around.. I kinda wanna ask specially for v2 stuff since Im so in love with it and your art.

yayayay pride headcanons!! i'm not sure if i'll be good at putting this into words, but i very much love whatever the machines have going on with their genders - v1 is strictly it/its to me, while v2 is an any and all pronouns haver. both of them very rarely experience attraction as well, but when they do, it's a strong pull to the other party who can be any gender or presentation. having my brain rewired by dect like everyone else as well as bc of my own personal interpretation of the character, i like to think v2 would primarily be drawn by intricacies of thought and an emotional connection, as those are incredibly rare for it to find. bc i think of v2 so much as a dreamer, i am absolutely drawn to its chemistry with mirage in her rumination, and i certainly think it could only feel attraction to someone else when it felt its mind and inner self were understood. v1 is its flip side, needing to feel its spark through physical connection, generally through a fight but it's more than just that fight being good - the movements, the attacks, the flow all influence how it feels. overall, v2 is cerebral while v1 is material in how they are attracted to others, because that's how they define themselves in a sense

gabriel is definitely gay to me and very much in the process of figuring out what he likes and how his attraction works since any relationships he's had never got the chance to breathe before this. he does crave a lot of affection and attention, both physical and emotional, and he can be quite romantic but the way he loves and experiences love is very different from humans. i also very much like trans gabe hcs, if only just bc it makes me happy and i think it suits him. bonus for bi minos of course, nb ferryman, and trans sisyphus :] and just in general, i feel so comfy in how the machines relate to their gender so differently and have aesthetic ideas and presentations, but don't identify in binary terms. i'm an nb ace myself with a strong pull to neutral pronouns (esp "it"), so i love seeing machines like the mindflayers that have defined aesthetic/presentation preferences but those don't necessarily indicate their gender, if that makes sense

[cat-sapphics]

fuck it imma dump aroace c!tommy on y’all, this is gonna be a long one...

gonna take a break from focusing on twitter for the moment and talk about a hc that’s going around the mcyt fandom but isn’t quite popular enough yet imo. original idea certainly isn’t mine but instead of “it just makes sense” i’ve compiled SO MUCH to make it all add up perfectly!!

he's a very unstable and insecure character, yeah? so he doesn't want people to know things about him that probably aren't "normal" - Especially since there are so fucking many romantic relationships on the dream smp, i guess it's kinda expected of him since ranboo and tubbo got together so openly. but he's aroace, so if he does get into a relationship he won't feel any real romantic or physical attraction and he won't be happy. to cover this, this explains why his whole entire bit is all "i love women and girls and i am very straight but also since twitter is canon i might jokingly be lesbian actually and i very much get lots of pussy and i have sex with girls every night and GIRLS GIRLS GIRLS" blah blah blah. it's so abnormal and strange that it's just a poor attempt at a cover-up, which only kinda works because everyone else obviously knows it's a cover-up but they are just stumped at what for?? he's afraid that since he's so hated on the server already, if he fails to conform to their expectations he'll just be cast out even more. obviously that wouldn't happen, but considering how young he is and how much trauma he's been through, it's reasonable (and actually very normal) for his brain to just shut down all logical thinking and water it all down to "act in a way so as to survive."

but then it doesn’t even stop there - last night i saw someone point out that THOSE cat/mellohi discs are green and purple, which perfectly go hand-in-hand with the colors of the aro and ace flags that aren’t on the grayscale. and i FLIPPED. OUT. because honestly?? obviously there was more to it than just this, but i like to think that at least part of the reason why people failed to grasp his obsession/connection with those discs that he ruined relationships with others over was due to the comfort he found in those colors, almost as if it’s subtle pride “merch” for himself that didn’t raise any questions in that direction.

and THEN i realized that the allium flower is one single item consisting of both purple and green, so as the number one allium duo enthusiast, i just had to bring ranboo into it somehow, which actually came really easily because i knew just what to do: while ranboo is trying his best to make amends with tommy for whatever reason he’s so hostile to the enderboy for (which tommy refuses to disclose; nothing’s ever confused ranboo more), he does what he does best and simply wants to be there for him during whatever he’s doing through - but while doing so, he accidentally puts too much pressure on tommy to spill it all and kinda forces his little secret about being “broken” out of him completely by accident. ranboo feels bad of course, so he makes it clear that said secret is safe with him (he won’t even tell tubbo without permission, and that is very important to tommy because he doesn’t wanna potentially lose his best friend more than he already has) and that being aroace does Not, in fact, make him broken. ranboo picks an allium from the flower forest nearby and gives it to him the next day, their unspoken symbol of trust and acceptance between each other now.

and honestly? if that’s not enough allium duo bonding content for you? i can keep going! to me, c!ranboo is VERY MUCH heavily-coded to be nonbinary (unaligned but not agender imo, i haven’t decided on that yet) and biromantic-asexual. so he tells tommy this that at least for one half of his orientation, he is not alone, and not only that, but he finds comfort in the neopronouns end/ends and voi/void - he just hasn’t told anyone except tubbo beforehand because he’s afraid of receiving judgement as well. and so, they’re in this safe little lonely box together. :]

sooooo yeah, that just about does it for now! i’ll keep adding as i see fit because i love writing this stuff sososo much and projecting lgbt identities onto characters is so deeply important and personal to me <3

[blanketorghost]

Friendly reminder that just because OMORI doesn't have a confirmed lgbt character or sunflower isn't canon doesn't mean the game is queerbaity.

A key aspect of queerbaiting is actively using the possibility of lgbt characters to lure in lgbt folks. OMORI never advertised nor implied the appearance of lgbt characters nor any romance (aside from Aubrey's crush). Hell, before the official release Basil could've been an alter ego, imaginary friend, Sunny's sibling or even dead since the demo barely gave us any info about the two's relationship other than 'best friends'

OMOCAT also having an lgbt comic isn't conclussive evidence, just because she made a comic abt these issues once doesn't mean all her media has to be lgbt related, and expecting them to be is the mistake of the consumer, not OMOCAT's

As a queer person, it is frustrating seeing how the prescence of one queer coded character in a piece of media is immediately made into 'queerbaiting'. If you want to look at actual queerbaiting, look at voltron or disney, which have tried countless times to promote famous ships and gay characters to get people to watch their series without doing the effort of actually going thru it. Basil, as gay coded as he is inside the game, was never advertised to be queer nor his relationship with Sunny to be romantic prior to the game's release. And no, them being drawn beside one another, holding hands or talking aren't queerbaits (especially the holding hands thing, they are kids? Kids hold hands when they're best friends? This doesn't imply romantic interest)

Look, I'm not trying to discredit peeps' queer readings and interpretations of the game, I myself have my own queer headcanons for the main characters and ship sunflower, but honestly this whole 'queerbait' debate feels extremely un-nuanced coming from someone who had been following the game's development since 2014.

It is also really weird how Sunny and Basil's relationship is forced to be romantic by the fandom as an argument of queerbaiting. Look, I get it, they are really close and their friendship is one of the most important parts of the game, and you can definitely headcanon them to have feelings for each other (as I do) it is 100% valid. BUT two boys having a strong friendship isn't enough grounds for queerbait nor the idea should be forced onto people that it is? As gay as Basil is, he should be allowed to have a close male best friend. If you can see the chemistry in them, good! and you don't need to see it nor interpret it as that either it's also good. I, an ace biromantic person, hc it as romantic, as do some other queer friends, and some other queer friends hc them ad being 100% platonic while still acknowledging Basil's gay coding.

Sure, OMOCAT has made doodles of Sunny and Basil in a romantic context, but she has also done so for Kel x Sunny (both male and female versions), Sunny x Aubrey and Aubrey x Kim, that doesn't make them automatically canon but a creator having fun with her characters, as well as allowing others to do the same, saying this doodles confirm queerbait is very ???? I like to draw non-canon ships of my characters sometimes, does that make me queerbaity?

This honestly makes me so sad as both an lgbt person and as an artist that this shit happened, this over-scrutinizing and misuse of labelling queerbait content is just going to make it a buzzword when there are many more shows that actually are guilty of this which should be rightfully called out.

[mudstoneabyss]

💕🏳️‍🌈💢

[Takin these to be for wtnv]

💕 tell us about one of your favorite characters and why you like them!

Oh boy why I like Kevin huh? Why don't I like Kevin? I think he's such a well-crafted multi-dimensional character, and he's so fun too. Not to mention how good of an actor Kevin R Free is which makes Kevin all the more better. I don't know how to go into details because my answer to why is like him is pretty genuinely because everything

🏳️‍🌈do you have any headcanons (lgbt, race, neuro, etc) that are important to you?

I am holdin bio trans dad Charles in my hands so gently, I have a lot a anxiety when it comes to pregnancy especially considerin how the healthcare system treats trans dads yeesh, but I would really like to be a bio dad so just havin a char I can see as a happy an healthy one. Honestly trans man Charles is important to me as a whole ajflkejlaekf kinda to the point where seein him portrayed as not bein transmasc makes me uncomfortable. Autistic Charles (an Carlos) are also pretty important to me, an Kevin bein mentally ill aint a hc it is canon but that is important to me too

💢 what do you NOT like about your hyperfixation? is there something you would want to change about it?

How little db content they make But no to answer seriously Night Vale has had it's moments a not bein Great with its portrayal a mentally ill people. Nothin seriously bad but yknow still. It could not be, I aint sayin it is, but I'm also gon say that if the future in triptych is the end a Kevin's story I... don't like that. It's so unsatisfyin to have a character with a tragic backstory have a tragic end. An uh also wish we knew more about any db char other than Kevin. Lauren for example, she's almost as prominent a character as him there's even a song in the db ost with her name yet we know jackshit about her?

[sagemoderocklee]

Reiteration ❤️ A (but not GaaLee :p) P T

A - Your current OTP(s)/OT3(s)/OTX(s)

oof. okay so aside from GaaLee:

1) ShikaTema 2) NejiTen 3) Kakagai

i think these are the only like three ships i could say i feel strongly enough about that i’d classify them as OTPs. GaaLee honestly gets its own category anyways. im not really active in any other fandoms, and the only other ship I’ve ever felt as strongly about as i have gaalee was really Harry/Draco and well... ya know. Although if i were still super active in CLAMP fandom KuroFai and DouWata would 100000% be up there. And of course the forever and unbeatable Sakura/Shaoran but specifically CCS SakuShao because I think TRC isn’t quite as good with their romance

P - Invent a random AU for any fandom (we always need more ideas)

oh. that’s. okay we’re answering hard questions tonight i see.

something niche for you and me: new member of your MLM/communist/leftist reading group is Very Cute but very new to MLM/etc and needs extra help to understand the complicated history, theories, etc.

T - Do you have any hard and fast headcanons that you will die defending, about anything at all (gender identity, sexual or romantic orientation, extended family, sexual preferences like top/bottom/switch, relationship with poetry, seriously anything).

oh god. this is really opening a can of worms lmao and also.... i may have to put this under a cut because god i have so fucking many and some of them may need elaboration.

1. Gaara doesn’t ever take up sleeping/napping post Shukaku

this is something that I know a lot of ppl don’t like/want because everyone wants Gaara to be happy and like big same! but i do think that Gaara’s physiology is entirely altered from Shukaku and the lack of sleep. I feel like having it ingrained in him that he couldn’t sleep, knowing the devastation it would cause, plus all the trauma he has--he’d be plagued by nightmares first of all, and no shinobi is gonna wanna take a sleep aid or something to help them sleep more easily because that would just be a huge opening for someone to attack you. but the other thing is i think it would genuinely make him feel sick. like i know that when i get too little sleep i feel sick because my body needs a certain amount. BUT i also know that those days where im too depressed and don’t get out of bed and sleep too much i ALSO feel like shit. Gaara has lived his entire life without sleep--barring specific instances of forced sleep to release Shukaku--and his body has to have adapted to that. fifteen years of not sleeping there’s no way his body would know what to do with that. his body is so used to subsisting (and this is my own like explanation for how Gaara survived pre and post Shukaku) off of massive quantities of food and by funneling his own chakra into his brain to act as rest, healing, etc.  like i think at this point it’s so unconscious that he isn’t even aware he’s doing it anymore--like breathing. His chakra--which is already another physiological system in their bodies--is just taking up the job of the rest portion of his brain.

that all being said, i do still think this will have an overall affect on his lifespan, but not necessarily his physical or mental health in the immediate sense.

2. Kankuro is straight.

this goes for like all the characters i see as straight, and like i hate like putting this in the like “die defending” category, but there’s this sort of.... sense that when you’re LGBT in fandom you’re gonna see every character as gay and you’re sus/someone’s gonna side eye you if you don’t. like i get the whole ‘well obviously everything is straight and cis IRL, and im sick of it’ reasoning behind “everyone is gay/trans” but the thing is.... I wanna see cis and straight people who support their gay/trans friends and family. I don’t need to live in a world where no one is straight and cis. I need to live in a world where people who are straight and cis actually support and love LGBT people. i personally don’t get anything out of the fantasy of no straight cis people because what does that solve? and what does that say about the homophobia and transphobia within the series? It doesn’t solve or say anything. And quite frankly a series like Naruto is inherently homophobic and transphobic (especially trans misogynistic), and i think brushing that aside with an “everyone’s gay/trans” is more insulting than helpful because it’s not addressing the issue. I’m more invested in seeing the characters who aren’t LGBT supporting and loving and working to make the world better for their LGBT friends, family, and community.

like i know not everyone is writing/reading fanfiction or art or what have you in fandom for like realism or whatever, i get the whole escapism of it all, but i approach it this way because for me I just don’t get anything out of pretending that the -isms and -phobias within the series don’t exist.

also straight trans people exist?????

i could go on about this--like some characters are just... not good and i don’t wanna claim that as LGBT because of that--but like i think this is the biggest thing for me at the end of the day: seeing ppl who aren’t LGBT supporting LGBT ppl.

3. Gaara is a polyglot. Also, he’s self-taught in just about everything. He spent most of his youth in the Suna library for obvious reasons, so reading, writing, language, poetry, history, politics, arts, etc he learned there on his own.

4. Shikamaru and Temari live in Suna 6 months out of the year, and Konoha the other 6. Temari does NOT give up her job to be a nagging wife, and Shikamaru is 100% a wife man.

5. Lee is not originally from Konoha or Fire. He doesn’t remember his parents or how he wound up at a Konoha orphanage because trauma. Also his first language isn’t Japanese.

I have more specific HCs about who Lee’s parents are, where he came from, and what happened to his parents, but that’s like spoilers for a fic.

6. Tenten is not an outright orphan. She actually comes from a clan of weapons masters and smiths.

I think it’s fairly common for ppl to assume Tenten is an orphan because we obviously never see her family--granted we just don’t see much of her to begin with--but I personally fell in love with the idea of her having a clan with the focus being weapons. Her parents are still dead, but she lives with her grandmother, who’s renowned for her weapons.

7. Lee has a HUGE amount of chakra. Like obnoxiously huge stores of it that he just doesn’t know how to manipulate--not quite Kisame levels, but definitely a LOT. He gets as far as walking on water and walls, but he absolutely has to be focused to accomplish those feats and prefers just going really fast so he doesn’t fall in/off.

8. Sage mode!Rock Lee.

I have talked about this before(x, x), but you can absolutely pry this from my cold dead hands--actually, you couldn’t. I’d still hold on to this even in death.

9. Lee has like a photographic memory which is why he always writes things down that people tell him.

10. Gaara will be the last Kazekage--whoever comes after him (and i do have a HC for that) will be Kazekage only in the sense that they’re like the figurehead maybe, but ultimately Gaara is working to completely change the shinobi way of life and the Kage system will be dismantled starting with Suna/Gaara.

11. In a modern AU context, Lee is a HUGE fan of Queen and Bruce Lee.

12. Lee definitely grows his hair out later on in life and changes up his attire and becomes his own person.

13. The Kazekage Estate is a generation home--most households in Suna are, and in fact, it’s really fucking weird for someone not to live in a generational home--so Gaara lives there with his siblings. When Temari gets married, she and Shikamaru live there, and continue to do so when they have kids. If Kankuro has a kid (and a spouse), they’ll live there too. Lee eventually moves in. The house is always filled with love. When Gai visits with Kakashi, or when Tenten and Neji visit, they stay there too.

[citrineghost]

I'm not asking for money

Hey there guys, I'm titling this as such because I need some help but I don't want to scare off people (people like me) who skip past donation posts because they're unable to help and feel bad.

While I do have monetary troubles, the help I'm actually seeking from my followers and anyone who stumbles across this is housing and work. Of course most of you won't be able to help with these yourself, but I'm hoping some of you might have recommendations or the power of word of mouth.

About Me

My name's Ezra. I'm a 21 year old trans guy living in Tennessee in the US. I'm struggling a lot with undiagnosed chronic illnesses, transitioning, and maintaining the ability to work through chronic pain. I have a passion for writing, art, and music (which doesn't at all make me like 90% of Tumblr users, shhhh)

About My Situation

I've been living with my sibling's family since late April of 2018. They offered me a place to stay after breaking up with my abusive boyfriend. I was meant to pick up the pieces and gain my footing, but the longer I struggle to do so, the more strain this arrangement puts on me and my family. The situation has been increasingly difficult for us all to maintain and I'm being asked to find somewhere to live by the end of June (for the record, it's the 19th of May as I'm posting this).

I'm physically unable to do manual labor outside the house (and barely inside the house oof). At the moment, I'm a remote content writer for a Canadian marketing company. This brings me in an average of 350 USD a month. This month I'll be making a bit extra from some side work they've given me.

What I Need for Housing

What I need, primarily, is housing. If you or someone you know lives in Western Tennessee, preferably around Jackson, and has a room they would like to rent out, please let me know. I think I could probably pay $200 a month on rent without going hungry. Less is better, but I know how things are.

Ideally, but not necessarily:

This person would have no cats and not be a smoker, since I'm allergic and have asthma.

I would not be required to do household work past cleaning up my own messes, used dishes, and such. I don't mind helping once in a while if it's needed, but daily chores are nigh impossible for me to keep up on with the state of my health.

The room available is on the same floor as the entrance, since stairs are hard on me.

The person keeps the bathroom, if shared, in not-horrifying condition (my standards are pretty low honestly).

The only things that are necessary is that there's WiFi available, since I need it to do my job, and that whoever I'm moving in with is LGBT+ and disabled friendly.

What I'm like to live with:

I can probably be distantly heard talking to my boyfriend or listening to music, but if I'm ever too loud, I'll make my best effort to change my volume. I'll adhere to quiet hours as well.

I'm frequently up late, so if whoever I'm living with wants to hang out in the middle of the night, there's a good chance I'll be around.

I have really varied taste in music so if you like music, 👍👍👍👌👌👌

I'm capable of cleaning up after myself to whatever degree you find acceptable. If you don't want me leaving any of my stuff in the living room or bathroom, I'll live by it. If you want every dish I use to be hand washed after I use it, I'll do my best. I'll probably be using disposables most of the time anyway, since it's easier on me and I wouldn't want anyone cleaning up after my messes.

I'm minimal on drama. I don't generally like getting involved in drama and I'm very laid back. If you like people who are low energy, I'm your guy. I enjoy spending time with people and talking about just about anything. If you want your roommate to be your friend and you're not a hateful person, we'll probably get along great.

I stay in my bed or on the couch most of the day. Because of my chronic pain and disabilities, I hang out on soft surfaces where I can work and explore my hobbies without dislocating things, so having an understanding roommate will go a long way for me.

If you want help on a craft project and I'm feeling not-dead, there's a great chance I'll help out.

What I Need for Work

The second thing I need is some pointers for other places I can work remotely from the computer. I'm currently doing content writing for a marketing company and have nearly ten months of experience under my belt. Other jobs like that would be great. I'm also open to:

Art jobs. This could be working as a concept artist for game characters to mock up work for websites. I can do commissions as well as logo design. If it involves drawing digitally or traditionally, it's worth asking me about. Honestly, at this point, I'd draw nsfw commissions as well if the price is worth it.

Writing jobs. I love all kinds of writing. I'm willing to do just about any remote writing job I'm offered. I specialize in fantasy and romance personally but I'm also good for most other genres as well as content writing for company websites. I'm fast and proficient and probably qualified enough in experience hours that I could be an editor, if my lack of higher education can be overlooked. This includes fic commissions. I'm not in a ton of popular fandoms, but I'd do my research if I was getting paid to write something.

Other remote work that doesn't involve calls. I have pay by the minute phone service and anxiety so remote phone support jobs don't work for me. Anything else that seems like something I might be interested in, shoot me a message because it might be perfect. I'm open to suggestions.

Thank you to everyone who reads or reblogs this

I know this post has been massive and I never thought I'd actually have to write one of these, but desperate times call for desperate measures. And, of course, on the off chance that anyone actually does want to throw me a few bucks, my PayPal is hc si nd ris (at) gmail.com but I don't expect anyone to send anything. Please don't feel obligated, especially if you yourself are struggling.

[claroquequiza]

hopping on this apparent train of people asking about rep in afterdrop -- any lesbians? :- DD

*straight content creator voice*

You already have LENA! Isn’t that enough?????? tHe LeSbIaNs ArE tAkInG oVeR!!! ＼| ￣ヘ￣|／

I’m definitely not stopping with Lena–Hanzo’s already met another lesbian! BUT WHO

WHO

(it’s Athena)

(no not really)

The only major identity that is currently not in Afterdrop is a trans man, which is a damned shame–that’s not to say that I think that it’s IMPOSSIBLE and that other people who hc characters as a trans man are WRONG–I just don’t see anyone as a trans man in Afterdrop specifically at the moment. 

That could change as more lore and/or characters are released and/or my own feelings change, but if anyone was wondering about rep, that’s who is missing, and the world of Afterdrop is definitely incomplete without a major trans man character. 

On one hand, I’m tempted to go, “You’re the author, asshole, just make someone a trans man!” but that also feels cheap? Like, the characters who I see as lesbian, gay, bi, trans, ace, etc. in Afterdrop–I didn’t go down a LGBT+ checklist going, “I need a lesbian–check. I need a bi, check, etc.”, it’s just as I thought about the characters in Afterdrop, their sexuality and identity just sorta happened. 

But that also feels like a cop out, because an awful lot of content creators would say, “Well, I would have an LGBT+ character–”

What, all at once? - name that post…

“–but none of them strike me at LGBT+, so they’re all straight, the end.”

So. I’ll be thinking about this. But speaking completely honestly, there are no trans men in Afterdrop right now, and that definitely isn’t a good thing.

[familiaanteomnia]

for the lgbt+ ask game, please answer the odd numbers as the mun. (although, i think i know your answers for some of those questions.)

*Warning: This is going to be potentionally triggering, etc with talk of unsupporting family and stuff.* 

What do you identify as and what are your pronouns?: Trans Male, he/him or Lurching Thing *tm* Take it this implies orientation too so- gay, asexual. (But I appreciate that girls can kick my ass, and are pretty) Have you experienced being misgendered? What happened and how did you overcome it?: I don’t like go anywhere, and interact with people. At most my family basically often, daily. This one obnoxoxious boy in public who was all ‘oh yeah that’s a girl obviously’. Do have plenty of confusing people and them being like ‘so that’s uh- you person there’. Or getting gendered correctly. Supposedly I pass more than I give myself credit for. 

Which like before I even had fully accepted myself confused a doctor once. Waiting around and it was like ‘hey uh- could you please move, kid’. I mean even when I was presenting as my birth gender once had kids mistake me for a college age guy so -shrug-. 

Describe what it was like coming out, what did you feel?: Terrible, still is with family and coming out’s never finished. 1st time, family. I’ll share that cause it’s the real crux of things. Worst than the horror scenarios I’d pictured.

I hadn’t slept much in weeks, hands trembling with an urge to self harm because I’d given it up around then. Out of town, visiting family. Shit storm. A phone call outside in a meltdown, false hope because it sounds like I might be tolerated. Two day stomach flu. Car ride to meet halfway for lunch before going home days later with my mother. Rock hitting the window shield, cracking it making me wish it broke. 

Growing dread. Immense guilt that I can’t even look at the driver of the car. My mother wouldn’t even look at me, babbling to try being even seen as her child in the slightest. Dead silence. Going home. The start of yelling, fighting, being a mistake. Cut off from all internet access. Even when things died down I’d do something wrong and it would be twisted against me. I’ve been yelled at in public for it. Talked behind my back, while present. Crap situations in a doctors office, etc. Thankfully they were more chill. 

Like I’m more out than I was but it’s still like ‘hush hush’. Partly because I always bail out of telling people off. Because I just wanted my family, I just want the people I care for to even slightly respect me. To actually talk to me, not about me behind my back/to each other while I’m sitting there instead of directly saying “How are you” or small talk. I love them- I’ve hurt myself emotionally, sacrificed so much but they can’t even try to see me as even just a person.

What is one question you hate people asking about your sexuality?: I mean I get no questions/don’t interact with people much but I hate the ‘top, or bottom’ crap specially from females in gross excess. Like when somebody hcs a character trans but then it’s just that, s*x and ‘top or bottom’Who are your favourite lgbt+ ships?: m/alec, m.agnus chase/alex f.ierro, klaus/dave, and like I have so many more. Not all of them have ship names, or are coming to mind right now though.Do you experience dysphoria? If so, how does that affect you?: Yes. I also have other body image issues. It makes me hate taking or being in pictures. Makes me hate leaving the house. Being around people. It’s literally like those scales where it’s like ‘get help if you’re at level 10 and it super impacts your life’. And I’m on like 15 constantly. I have literal clothes where it’s like ‘after top sugery’ ‘when I’m skinnier-’ and then it’s ‘which of the two shirts’ ‘these jeans, oh but they’re kind of no thanks’. Always wearing boots when I have cute sneakers,etc. 

I don’t wear eyeliner like I used to. Yet I like bought some a while back like ‘oh these colors are pretty’ it’s just sat. Don’t use chapstick sometimes despite owning it, chapped lips at times. Constantly end up screwing my eyes shut while changing, random breakdowns like ‘I have the wrong shape nails’. Safe to say as a result it’s like really messed up. Supposedly I’m an attractive person energy wise,etc but yet I’m like ‘uhhh ew I look terrible’ and compliments feel fake especially if the person has never seen me. -shrug-What’s your favourite thing about the lgbt+ community?: Honestly? Like those who sometimes are just like ‘hey I get it’. Or appreciate dumb poetry I share,etc. The people who sometimes are like ‘hey I’ve got your back’. Or accept me as a person, labels aside. Those who I came across that have spoken about their situations with my childhood church/spoken out. Published books. Made a whole album of it. One of them who was like the og in a way messaged me once like ‘hey it’ll be okay’. So I’d say the good people, good parts- who actually fight for each other,etc. Instead of playing gate keeper,etc.Have you ever been to your cities pride event? Why or why not?: Nope, it’s like a few hours and I’m always broke/no way I’d be like ‘hey family member spend some gas, cash take me to pride’. Plus I know nobody irl so I’d be alone big time. Also my local one seems big on the ‘partying, drinking’ events etc. Plus you have to like pay? Then like parade wise I can’t bind for that immense amount of time there, during (in the hot sun), and back. Or walk/march cause uh my legs be dumb sometimes/asthma. I want to go to an event or parade sometime, someday though. Though I’m like ‘okay but I’d like to flags? Perhaps socialize? Kiss a cute boy?’ so *frustrated noises*. Have you been in a relationship and how did you meet?: Not really cause I guess my middle school nonsense (not even dating but trying to be ‘normal’) doesn’t count. But like also that’s fine. I attract toxic people. So like I’d rather wait try patiently waiting for somebody good to come my way. Who can accept all of  me and will know it’ll be rough but I’ll also be like ‘hey let’s go get doughnuts late at night and go to a park, snuggle under a tree’. Have you ever faced discrimination? What happened?: Not really, not yet. Have had some memorable encounters. Been scared shitless once that I was about to get assaulted in a public library. But then again that might be the people’s attitude around here which is mostly ‘hush hush’ fake niceness,etc. Bound to happen though. Who are some of your favourite lgbt+ bloggers?: Don’t really have any? I mean the whole tag more or less, of some of the religious lgbt+ peeps who know the church I was raised in. I watch quite a few trans youtubers though, not all of them are exactly wildly known. Other than that -shrug-. 

Have you ever gone to a gay bar, or a drag show, how was it?: Never- honestly doesn’t appeal much to me either like history sure. Something people can do- hell yeah. Personally drinking wouldn’t be healthy for me *not of age currently anyways*. And drag shows usually are at such events- crowds, people. Just not sure I’d last even 20 seconds to have fun or anything. Are you interested in having children? Why or why not?: Not sure, bio kids are a solid no for reasons. But otherwise- I like babysitting, kids adore me for some odd reason. So like say I date or fall for somebody who has a kid or is on good terms with family/loves babysitting. I’d be totally happy babysitting or hanging around with said person and their child. Things like adopting though? Good option yet I’d not think it over too much till it’s a conversation/have a person and its stable. (Plus like trauma,etc is a thing that makes it loaded as well)What do you think of gender roles in relationships?: If it’s their thing- sure. But the gross gender roles? I’ll scowl at. Like honestly especially if it’s straight people,etc like ‘well whose the tougher one’ etc. Or praising abuse like ‘the guy can’t hang out with other girls uwu, I have access to his phone all the time- we’re joined at the hip all the time’. For anybody. Like people need breathing room? And are an individual even if in a couple. What is something you wish people know about being lgbt+?: Uhhh ‘it gets better’ isn’t always comforting cause sometimes it does take years. To work through things. Work things out. That sometimes it takes conversation, time and immediate rejection isn’t always how it’ll be. But you should also put yourself first, not be like ‘oh I can’t work on getting hormones because I want my family to adjust, etc’. Idk. 

[violyntfemme]

rules:

1. always post the rules. 2. answer the questions given by the person who tagged you. 3. write 11 questions of your own and tag 11 (or however many) people to answer them.

I was tagged by @hisreindeerjumper (first set) and @futuredescending (second set) so I am answering two sets.

Sorry this took so long but I started it last night as the meds were kicking in and it quickly devolved into incoherency :) 

1. what fandom have you been involved in that’s your favorite to date? Kingsman, hands down. Things are a little rough now and then lately, but I am hoping we find that live and let live attitude we all had less than six months ago, both before and after K2

2. what did you want to grow up to be when you were little? An archeologist, or a writer, or a fashion designer. I can’t draw and I hate chipped nails so really only one of those were going to work out for me.

3. favorite places to shop online? My Pretty Zombie cosmetics. 

4. first kiss! tell me all about it! and i you haven’t been kissed yet, how do you want it to go down? do you want to be kissed at all? It was at my grandmother’s house. I was 13, he was 18. He played the guitar and I thought he was a god. It was horrible though. I mean I knew nothing about kissing and he, like a typical guy, thought that he had to inhale the lower portion of my face. 

5. who was the first author that you read with a voracious hunger? Poppy Z. Brite. I still have my original, and falling apart, copies of Lost Souls and Drawing Blood, along with most of her (now his) books that have been released. I read and re-read them a million times.

6. what color looks best on you? Black. Always.

7. do you read your horoscope? If I come across it, but I do not seek it out.

8. what are you most proud of in your life? My published LGBT erotica. You think it would be becoming an attorney. Nope, it’s my porn that makes me proud. 

9. favorite food & why! Milano Cookies, dark chocolate preferably. They are wonderful with a cup of tea. They remind me of staying up late with my mother watching old BBC shows.

10. what scent do you have the strongest memory association with? CK One. I can’t stand it now, but one sniff and I am back in 1995 instantly. 

11. favorite tea flavor! Earl Grey, more specifically, Hooded Figures blend or a London Fog.

------

1. What is the nicest thing someone has done for you? When we had a rare ice storm and it was super cold out, my husband got up while I was getting ready for work and turned on my car to warm it up and de-ice it. Then he took some small rugs, the kind you wipe your feet on, and placed them over the ice as a path so I could get to my car safely (since I use a cane). Inside the car was my coffee and lunch waiting for me. This is the kind of thing he does on the reg. I don’t know why the man stays with my salty and bitter ass.

2. Do you have NOTPs? If so, why are they NOTPs for you? In Kingsman, Roxy/Eggsy. I am not hating on the ships at all, they just don’t work for me because I can’t see any tension between the characters. Roxy and Eggsy are my number one BROTP though and any fic that can capture that relationship well has all my love. In Sherlock John/Mary/Sherlock or Sherlock/Mary. I cannot stand her. Well, I take that back. The Mary that lived in John’s head in the last two episodes, her I actually liked quite a bit.

3. Summarize the worst film/book/song/story you’ve ever read/watched? Girl gets cursed by an old woman because Girl denies the lady a loan extension. Cue the worst. movie. I. have. ever. watched. My husband and I hated it so much that every time we watch something shitty we say that was terrible, but it wasn’t Drag Me to Hell terrible. It is the movie that all shitty movies are measured against. My best friend loved it and he is no longer allowed to rec movies to us. 

4. What are some fandom/fic things that irrationally annoy you? The mob mentality that crops up when there is a disagreement over anything. It happens in every fandom. Conversation devolves into vague-blogging and and passive aggressive tags. We are adults. Somebody doesn’t like what you like or vice versa? Cool. You keep liking your shit the way you like it and they can keep liking their shit the way they like it. There is more than enough shit for all of us to like. There will never be a shortage of shit, trust me on this.

Don’t agree with someone? Wonderful. Either talk about it like an adult and have a conversation or leave it alone. For example, there is a topic that I 100% stay away from in the Kingsman fandom because it makes me very uncomfortable and anxious. I do not agree with the popular opinion of the fandom regarding this topic. However, I realize that it is a popular topic, which very few, if any at all, of the rest of the fandom has an issue with, so I either blacklist it or take a little tumblr break until the conversation dies down. Because I am an adult and I am responsible for my internet experience. 

5. Write a summary for the fic you want to write but never will? Q has been clean for years, before even MI6 got their hands on him. The day James leaves with Madeline, however, Q finds himself in a ratty hoodie and torn jeans, walking down the same street where he once traded favors for whatever drug he needed that day. Cocaine for coding, X for laughter, morphine to forget. He just needs it this once. Morphine to forget James and whatever they were becoming before Swann, well, swanned, in. Cocaine to get him to work the day after. 

He has this under control. He does.

Until he doesn’t. Until Q is one needle away from existing and Geoffery, the addict, is about to take his place again. 

Until James comes back and sees what he left in his wake.

6. Someone writes a story that perfectly hits all your buttons. That story includes: _____, ______, and _________.  HC, Dom/Sub and ANGST. Kill me with the angst (bonus points if one of the pairing is in a downward spiral of self-destructive tendencies). 

7. I’m stealing @colinfilth’s question once asked on twitter bc it was SO GOOD: what is the fic one would write that clued your readers in that your identity had been stolen? A fic where there is a MCD of one people in the pairing, or the pairing the fic centers around does not end up together in the end. I want everyone to suffer terribly, cry and gnash their teeth, but they have to end up together and happy by the last sentence. It literally can be the last sentence that brings them back together, but it HAS to be there. After much pain and suffering of course.

8. Most embarrassing celebrity crush, past or present? I thought George Hamilton was the shit when I was really young for some reason. For the life of me I can’t even remember why or what show he was in that I watched. 

9. How much research will you do for a fic? Wing it? Get lost in a wikipedia hole? Read actual books on a topic? Google translate? Get consulting with native speakers? I will go as far as I need to to make sure whatever I am writing is as correct as possible. I don’t have a brit picker though because I am too introverted to ask, so that is an opportunity I have in my fics.

10. The one thing the creator of your current fandom could do to kill your fandom love. Not give us multiple shots of Whiskey’s ass in those Levis. 

I jest. A little.

Honestly, even if the movie sucks, I will still be here because the fan fic is phenomenal and I love the people I interact with within the fandom. And if the fandom falls apart, I will still be here by myself, re-reading the fan fic that has already been written. 

My questions:

1. What is something you loved as a child that you still love as an adult?

2. What is a show/book/band/movie that you love but are embarrassed to admit to?

3. If you have a day completely to spend as you please, what do you do?

4. What book or fic can you literally read over and over again to the point where you could probably recite it, but you still read it?

5. If you wear makeup, what is the one thing you could not live without?

6. Who is a role model for you? (Fictional or Real)

7. What fandom were you in, that you are no longer in, that you miss even though you won’t go back to it?

8. What is your aesthetic?

9. If you had to choose on to give up, would you give up reading or listening to music. Why?

10. What is the one thing that you feel as if you must do before you die? The number one spot on your bucket list.

11. How long have you been friends with your best friend(s)?

I’m tagging @opalescentgold, @timetospy, @mannersmakethmoi, @privatelyvex, @alethiaii, @plotqueen and @eggsy-youcheekytart, and anyone else who hasn’t done it yet.

[segadores-y-soldados]

(not @-ing the person because if they wanna find this they can) (also not putting this under a cut because it deserves to be “out” (lol) in the open)

“God knows I'm an hardcore r76 shipper but I genuinely don't agree with any of this. Teasing tone?banter? It's interesting to me how people perceive things completely differently. Honestly I always thought as reaper as the concept of people catering to the edgy teen stereotype, he's super macho and mysterious. Now he's getting more background and that's good and right, but it started out as a stereotype of a het teen fantasy. I don't mean this as bashing op, everyone is entitled to their Hc.”

---

I think we’re getting something really LOST in translation here.

Because unless I’m wrong

It seems to me like you think I’m stating that Gabriel/Reaper’s mlm-coding is somehow...intentional.

And that leads me to ask:

Do you know what queer/gay coding is?

Queer/gay coding is NOT necessarily intentional on part of the creators.  Sometimes it is, sometimes it isn’t.  When queer/gay coding IS intentional, that’s a form of “queer baiting” - attempting to get a greater audience, usually LGBT+ people, by dangling a “queer/LGBT character” in front of them.  Typically, queerbaiting is never actually fulfilled and instead leaves LGBT+ fans feeling frustrated, denied, and used.

When queer/gay coding is unintentional, it is seen by the creators as “a mistake” and that the fans are “reading too much into it.”

But here’s the thing.

Queer/gay coding exists.  It’s real.  It happens A LOT, whether intentional or not.

http://theroguefeminist.tumblr.com/post/56658099133/queer-codedqueer-coding

http://lgbtfiction.com/index.php?title=Queer_coding

Here are some good starting places to read up on what queer/gay coding is and how it can manifest.  Specifically for our purposes, we wanna look at: “More commonly, however, queer coding is used to reinforce negative and harmful stereotypes. For example, male villains are often depicted as effeminate and flamboyant in contrast to the "manly" hero, reinforcing both damaging stereotypes about masculinity and tropes such as the Depraved Homosexual.”

“Even traits that have become tropes for villains (being well-dressed; having feminine mannerisms or manner of speech; being aristocratic in manner, wealth and appearance; being a smooth talker; having flamboyant hand gestures, manners of dress, and decor in their homes/lairs; having little to no interest in women; being conniving or catty etc etc etc) show how deeply imbedded queer coding as been to the point where queer qualities are associated with evil.”

So let me repeat my original point:

Gabriel Reyes/Reaper is mlm/gay-coded.

That list of design elements?

Those are statements of FACT about his appearance and mannerisms.

I dunno how you think you’re gonna “disagree” with the fact that he wears jewelry, heels, has a faint lisp, is almost 100% sassy/sarcastic/snide/sardonic, has a paired Contra reference spray with another masculine character, permits only one masculine character and reluctantly permits one feminine character to call him by a nickname, drops a ton of pop culture and music references, has a very clearly defined “aesthetic,” etc.  These are all things you can double-check in the game, in his character design, and in his voice lines.  Here, let me give you some links to start with:

http://segadores-y-soldados.tumblr.com/post/157092621240/reaper-art-assets

http://segadores-y-soldados.tumblr.com/post/157341261265/reaper-references

http://segadores-y-soldados.tumblr.com/post/157452109935/reaper-and-soldier-american-cultural-references

And for good measure, you can also have this one on Soldier: 76:

http://segadores-y-soldados.tumblr.com/post/157721843510/soldier-76-fact-sheet-references-and-some

In fact, with all the new Uprising content, I could actually probably write ANOTHER Reaper/Soldier: 76 “paired cultural references” just with the Commando skin-Predator line-Contra sprays alone.  

Which brings me to my next point:

“Honestly I always thought as reaper as the concept of people catering to the edgy teen stereotype, he's super macho and mysterious. Now he's getting more background and that's good and right, but it started out as a stereotype of a het teen fantasy.”

Gabriel Reyes/Reaper’s appeal to “edgy teen stereotype[s]” and “het teen [fantasies]” is about as deep as a puddle.  And you wanna know why?

Because about ALL of his references - save for the “I’m not a psychopath” one and “Nevermore” - are approximately 30 - 50 years old.

Present day.

So by “in-game time,” Gabriel Reyes/Reaper’s references are approximately 70 - 100 years old.

The man is a NERD.

Again, I’d like to refer you to the essays above.  Almost EVERY reference Gabriel Reyes/Reaper makes is older than you, me, and most of the people on this website.  He quotes Chick Hearns, Al Davis, AC/DC, The Last Starfighter, and Predator.  He now has a Contra reference spray.  His Pumpkin skin is a goddamn Headless Horseman homage.  His Raven skin is a Edgar Allan Poe reference.  The very name “Gabriel Reyes” is very likely to be a reference to Misión San Gabríel Arcángel and El Camino Real.

Do you know who Gabriel Reyes appeals to?

Men like my father.

Men in their 40’s - 60’s.

(This is why I wrote that “Gabriel/Reaper is basically a ‘mlm character designed and written by straight men (mostly).’”)

“Edgy het teeangers” don’t get the majority of Gabriel/Reaper’s references.  Bloody hell, half the replies and tags on my “Reaper References” post are simply “oh I never knew this” or “thanks for sharing this” because many people under the age of 40 simply don’t know them.  How could they?  How could you?  Have you ever heard the phrase “Welcome to the Black Hole?”  Unless you’re an Oakland (now Las Vegas) Raiders fan or you follow American football, how would you know it?  Did you know who Chick Hearns was before the “It’s in the refrigerator” quote?  Do you know the story of the Headless Horseman?  Did you how important San Gabriel Mission is to the history of Los Angeles?

The vast majority of Overwatch players under 20 simply don’t know all this stuff.

Sure, maybe they get the Nevermore reference.  Maybe they get the “I’m not a psychopath” reference.  They probably get the “Back in Black” reference.

But they probably don’t get all or even the majority of the references.  Many of them are just too old for young people to immediately recognize.

While ALL the Overwatch characters have pop culture references built into their in-game dialogue, their voice lines, their skins, their sprays, etc, the only other character to truly have as many “old references” is

Soldier: 76.

Jesse McCree definitely has some as well, but his are mostly limited to “The Dollar Trilogy” and “Mad Dog McCree.”  Soldier, meanwhile, has references to Evel Knievel, Michael Jackson, Apocalypse Now, Contra (again), Commando, and M.A.S.H.  In fact: “So I brought this up briefly in the Reaper References post, but as far as I can tell, Reaper and Soldier are the only two characters who make references to a major American movie star: Arnold Schwarzenegger.  This is rather odd considering characters like Reinhardt and Mercy are geographically and culturally closer to Arnold’s home country of Austria; Reinhardt in particular shares a similar sense of bravado and battle-lust that Arnold has portrayed in many of his films (Kindergarten Cop Reinhardt when?).”

“Reaper, on the other hand, has the voice line “If it lives, I can kill it,” which is a reference to Arnold’s famous quote “If it bleeds, we can kill it” from Predator, a movie that also features Schwarzenegger in a military role.  I’m waiting for someone to get an “Hasta la vista, baby” line - bonus points to Blizzard if they give it to Mercy.”

I haven’t gotten either of these yet, but the Contra sprays were a step away.  At this point now, I’m waiting for Gabriel/Reaper to get a Rambo or Stallone reference to complete the set.  

But sure, yeah.

I’m “reading too much into it.”

Never mind the fact that someone - or more likely, several someones - at Blizzard approved all these cross-references between two masculine characters.  Again - they don’t have to be intentional to be coded as queer/gay.  But with Uprising - in particular with the Contra sprays - we know that some of them ARE intentional.  It is not “coincidence” that the actual name of the Contra sprays is “Commando,” a reference to the Commando: 76 skin, which is in turn a reference to Schwarzenegger’s Commando movie.  And it’s not a “coincidence” that stills from the very first Contra box art has stills from Schwarzenegger in Predator, and Stallone in Rambo.  And that Gabriel/Reaper has had a Predator quote for ages now.

Do you think Blizzard - a company with their headquarters in Los Angeles, a video game company with their headquarters in Irvine/Los Angeles - is unaware of video game history?  Or Schwarzenegger movies?  Or Los Angeles/California history in general?

But sure, yeah.

I’m “reading too much into it.”

Which brings me to my final point:

“I don't mean this as bashing op, everyone is entitled to their Hc (headcanon).”

I need to ask:

What EXACTLY did you think you were going to accomplish by coming onto a post - written by a mlm trans man, describing really obvious, blatant mlm-coding in a masculine character’s design, a character who fits the two examples of queer/gay coding I’ve quoted above, all the way down to said character’s SHOES - and saying that you “disagree” and that I am “entitled to [my] own headcanon”?

You offered nothing as a rebuttal, you offered no counter evidence, all you did was lampshade that my discussion on the Reaper-Soldier interactions were not said in “teasing tones” and were not “banter” (hey, by the way, if you want to hear the lines again: http://overwatch.gamepedia.com/Soldier:_76/Quotes there they are.  You can hear the sarcastic laughter when Soldier starts the “you sure take to this bad guy thing easily, don’t you” and you can hear the teasing/mocking/sarcastic emphasis when Reaper says “boy scout” so literally no one has to take my word for it - the actual audio is right there).

You just did the deadass “gendered opposite” of when straight cis men went “I never expected Lena/Tracer to be a lesbian/wlw.  I never saw ‘the signs.’”

But hundreds if not thousands of wlw Overwatch fans will tell you the exact opposite.

And they’ll also tell you that many of them never dared to believe Lena/Tracer would be confirmed “canon lesbian/wlw.”

Because they had been burned one too many times before.

So what really, really ruffled my feathers about your response

Is the implication that I - a mlm trans dude, someone who has thought about their own masculinity every single day for the last 13 years - was somehow misreading mlm/masculine gay-coding.

That I had formulated some sort of “headcanon” about Gabriel Reyes/Reaper.

It’s true that I have MANY headcanons about the character -

But his mlm/gay-coding is not one of them.

The post was not meant as a defense of “is Gabriel Reyes/Reaper canonically gay?”  No.  Gay-coding has nothing to do with “level of canon.”  Gay-coding is about the presentation, design attributes, and stereotypes built into a character - intentional or not.  Gay-coding is about the implementation of ideas, concepts, traits, and biases about LGBT+ individuals - subconscious or not - that creators put on certain characters, especially “villainous” ones.

No, the point of the post was to simply list those exact design elements and “personality traits” that demonstrate just how mlm/gay-coded Gabriel Reyes/Reaper is.  The point of the post was to tell other mlm and our allies, “Hey - you’re not alone.  You’re not insane for seeing these traits.  These traits are real.  They are present.  They are veiled under a very thin layer of black kevlar, but they’re there.  You are not alone.  I see them too.”

You proved why the post was necessary.  

You proved why this whole list needed to be written in the first place.

Because some people will “disagree” even when presented with a straight (lol) list of elements and traits - things you can literally visually see on Gabriel Reyes/Reaper’s standard design - that show how the mlm/gay-coding was built into his character. And that includes before Reaper even HAD the “Gabriel Reyes” backstory.

http://segadores-y-soldados.tumblr.com/post/156816655280/blizzards-shitshow-of-a-timeline

http://segadores-y-soldados.tumblr.com/post/156928707135/blizzards-shitshow-of-a-timeline-part-2-the

You say that you thought Reaper was designed as an “edgy het teenager fantasy,” but Reaper has ALWAYS had the bangle, the heels, the skintight clothing, the slight lisp, the multiple belts, the hand gestures, the “sassiness,” the sarcasm.  These all existed before “Gabriel Reyes the character” did.  And even once Blizzard had thought of Reaper’s backstory, they continued to fill it with mlm/gay-coded stuff - voice lines, references, more sarcasm, only they also paired it with a “strong friendship/bromance” between Gabriel Reyes and Jack Morrison.

The question here is not if Gabriel Reyes is mlm/gay-coded.

By two definitions of queer/gay-coding, by a long list of design elements and traits, by the tone of voice of some of his dialogue, by everything that Blizzard has added to “Reaper” since the mere act of designing him -

He is mlm/gay-coded.

The question now is how intentional is all this.  

And if it will actually result in anything meaningful.

So don’t try to imply that I’m seeing or perceiving things that aren’t there.  

Like the vast majority of other mlm individuals, I’ve been burned A LOT by hoping and waiting and wanting the mlm/gay-coding to “mean something more.”

I’m not waiting for that here.

Rather, I am writing down what MANY of us are thinking but are too nervous to say: that Gabriel Reyes/Reaper is mlm/gay-coded, and therefore we are NOT “seeing things that aren’t actually there.”  They are, and I want my fellow mlm individuals to know that they are.