#so everybody gets sleeves. sleeves for the whole cast. all of em

[werewolfhooligan]

fixed somewhat to be more readable HHHHH the podcast about the definitely haunted boarding house is.. Good

[knowlesian]

ok, it doesn't look like anyone else asked, but i do want to know what your favorite jokes are (other than the genius crystal one)!!

A MILLION YEARS LATER and while i am drinking starbucks i have none to share, etc etc etc jokes.

and speaking of jokes (what a transition robert evans eat your heart out, shoutout to any other behind the bastards fans) here's another favorite on the list, since i've covered a couple since you sent this as i am wildly behind on asks, oops.

this time it's frenchie's response to stede trying to get everybody to say they'll talk it through as a crew.

(i feel like i read an interview with joel where he said that line was ad-lib, but i also might be entirely misremembering that. if i am not just making that up, as a writer sidenote i love how a lot of the improv moments seem to be done in the style of 'here's the basic thing going on, we will give you space on set to come up with the funniest version of it' nods from the writers. when you've got a cast like this let 'em rip, etc.)

frenchie has this cool thing going on where he's capable of both realistic codeswitching and what i am forced to call narrative codeswitching (mostly because i don't know what else to call it). if we attack things from the lens where ed and his crew switched metaphorical canons from gritty pirate drama to muppets, frenchie is the one who realizes that and asks ed if they're about to die instead of muppeting out about how cool it is that Thee Blackbeard is on their ship.

(in a fun beat since they're the other member of the crew ed keeps around, jim also identifies the potential of non-comedy stabbing but doesn't say anything about it until later, when frenchie has gone back into muppet mode and is nailing his sleeve to the deck.)

so: in order to codeswitch, you have to know how to speak your audience's language and hear what isn't being said. codeswitching is most often talked about in terms of literal language, but it doesn't stop there. behavior and piecing together what's going on behind the scenes nobody talks about are also part of it, because if you want to fit in you have to do what's expected of you; and in order to do that consistently, you have to understand what's expected of you.

whiiiich gets me to the actual joke and why it's even funnier coming from frenchie. because stede may tell other people to talk it through as a crew, but that's never his first move. stede tends to spill his guts when he's pushed into it; sometimes because somebody else went first, sometimes because intense circumstances and/or emotions overwhelm his instinct to lock everything down and insist he's fine.

stede does not talk it through as a crew. stede does backflips more than once to avoid talking things through with a variety of people over the season. stede bottles things up.

which is exactly what frenchie suggests stede wants them to do.

i should add that joel's delivery is great because this whole cast ringers all the way down, every goddamn person, but i'm obsessed with the way that takes a fun joke into a moment of telling us a lot about who frenchie is and what he's capable of, before we know anything else about him other than 'has a lute'.

he may not remember the rhyme, but he does know how to look past what people say to what they actually mean when that becomes necessary.

there's also a fun layer there where in-world we know frenchie learned the fine art of fancy people and their massive aggression because he was around them in a service capacity, so there's an in-world logic reason he is able to real world codeswitch between the world of Real Piracy and the world of aristocracy and think on his feet that echoes the thematic stuff working with the same theme on a more galaxy brain level.

i like this show a loooooot, the end.

[knives-out20]

Inglourious Boyfriends - Part 5

Fandom: Inglourious Basterds (2009)

Pairing: Joshua Margolis (OC) x Lt. Aldo Raine

Word Count: 2272

Warnings: Spoilers For Inglourious Basterds,

Note: Part 5, Lads. Shows How Joshua Is Clever, Meaning He Can Catch Onto Other Peoples’ Ideas Quickly. He’s Also Empathetic, And Is Able To Sway Aldo To Do, Or Stop Doing, Something.

Bridget Von Hammersmark groaned in pain as the needle injected its fluids into her body, fist covering her mouth in a failed attempt to muffle herself.

Aldo walked in, sleeves rolled up to his biceps."Not so goddamn fast, doc. Tell 'im to go play with his dog" he spoke, Donny and Joshua following him inside. Aldo pat the doctor as Hammersmark spoke to him in French, the doctor quickly dropping his equipment and going to sit by PFC Utivich. Aldo turned to Joshua, gently nudging him back to give himself room. He put his hands on the doctors equipment table, wasting no time and pushing it aside harshly, crashing it into the wall. Aldo angrily kicked the small stool the doctor sat on, Joshua taking another step back in fright. 

Donny stood menacingly over Bridget on one side of the table, his back to the barking dogs, as Aldo leaned his arm onto the table, his other hand on his hip.

"Before we yank that slug out ya, you need t'answer a few questions" Aldo said.

"Few questions about what?" She asked, gaze going from Aldo, to Donny, to Joshua.

"About I got three men dead back there. Why don't you try tellin' us what the fuck happened?" Aldo asked.

"The British officer blew his German act and the Gestapo major saw it" Bridget answered.

"Before we get into who shot John, why'd you invite my men to a rendezvous in a basement with a bunch of Nazis?" Aldo inquired, tilting his head.

Bridget shifted uncomfortably."I can see see since you didn't see what happened inside, that the Nazis being there must look odd".

"Uh, y-yea, we got a word for that kind of odd in English. It's called suspicious" Joshua piped up, hands behind his back as he stood at attention. He looked away when Aldo pressed the bullet deeper into Bridget's wound, having her moan in pain, louder than before."Aldo-".

"I know what I'm doin' Josh" Aldo held up his other hand, taking this as an excuse to look at his dearest.

"Everybody needs to calm down, you're letting your imagination get the better of you" Bridget strained, exclaiming again when Aldo pushed the bullet in deeper.

Joshua crossed his arms, shutting his eyes and turning his head away as if a lack of sight would dim down his hearing, too.

"You met the sergeant yourself. Willie. You remember him, don't you?" Bridget struggled, gripping the side of the table.

"Yea, I remember him" Aldo scoffed, taking a glimpse of Joshua's physical empathy. He also remembered how gentle Josh was, with treating the scar on Aldo's neck after the attempted lynching, back when Joshua and him fought the KKK one time. Aldo loves how Joshua's always been there to tend to his wounds, which have ranged from scratches on his knees after playing in parks when they were kids, to digging bullets out from his shoulder in more recent years. He inhaled slowly, exhaling at the same speed when he listened to Bridget.

"His wife had a baby, tonight. He had just become a fa-" Bridget squeezed her eyes shut, "he had just become a father!".

Joshua, from time to time, liked to imagine someone saying that about him, 'he had just become a father'. A soft smile graced his lips, in the worst moment possible. He always smiled, each time he thought about himself being a father. The idea of Aldo and him taking in a kid as their own, a little boy or girl the two of them could train to kick Nazi ass and fend for themselves. Joshua opened his eyes, catching Aldo looking right at him. He saw a knowing look in Aldo's eyes, automatically knowing that Aldo knew what he was thinking of.

Aldo hummed, turning his attention back to Bridget. 

"His commanding officer gave him and his mates the night off to celebrate" Bridget shakily breathed, groaning again."The Germans being there was either a trap set by me, or a tragic coincidence. It couldn't be both" she pleaded.

"Aldo..." Joshua called, in a tone that meant for Aldo to leave Bridget alone.

Aldo glanced at Joshua, looking back to Bridget with an arched brow before finally pulling his finger out. He took the handkerchief Joshua offered him, wiping his finger of blood as Bridget grunted."How'd the shootin' start?" He asked, glaring at all his Basterds, so that no one would take this as an opportunity to crack a joke about how Joshua's tamed Aldo the fucking Apache (a joke they make quite a lot).

"The Englishman gave himself away" she started.

"How'd he do that?" Aldo pressed, squaring his shoulders as the light hit him in a threatening way.

"He ordered three glasses" Bridget croaked, holding up three fingers in a way where her pinkie and thumb touched."We order three glasses" she clarified, holding up her thumb, pointer finger and middle finger."That's the German three, the other looks odd".

"So, uhm, t-that whole standoff happened 'cause he held up three fingers in a weird way t'order three drinks?" Joshua scoffed.

"It's much more serious than you think, especially nowadays” Bridget huffed."The Germans would, and did notice".

Aldo looked off in thought, pushing himself off the table."Okay, let's pretend there were no Germans, and everything went exactly the way it was supposed to" he imagined, going to lean against the doorway by Joshua."What was the next step?".

“Tuxedos." Bridget went to the point, suspiciously eyeing how close Aldo stood with Joshua."To get them into the premiere wearing military uniforms with all the military there would've been suicide".

Joshua pulled a quick sturgeon face in agreement.

"But, going as members of the...German film industry-".

"They wear tuxedos a-and- and fit in with everybody else!" Joshua cut Bridget off in conclusion, snapping his fingers."Eureka-- oh, uh, s-sorry, ma'am" he apologized, stepping closer to Aldo.

"No, it's fine, you're right" Bridget breathed heavily, catching Aldo smile down at Joshua with a certain air of adoration."I arranged for a tailor to fit three tuxedos tonight" she recalled.

"How'd you intend to get 'em in that premiere?" Aldo questioned, turning back to Von Hammersmark with a less positive gaze.

"Hand me my purse" Bridget instructed, Hirschberg obeying as Aldo walked back over. She dug inside her purse, everyone watching intently as she handed it to Aldo, who fished out a small card of paper."Lieutenant Hicox was going as my escort. The other two were going as a German cameraman and as his assistant".

Aldo inspected the paper, showing it off to Donny, then Joshua."You can still get us into that premiere?" He asked.

"You speak German better than your friends? No. Have I been shot? Yes! I don't see me tripping the light fantastique up a red carpet anytime soon. Least of all, by tomorrow night" Bridget groaned.

"Uh, a-actually, miss" Joshua respectfully cut in, pushing himself off the wall and walking over."I don't mean t'brag in front of my fellow Lieutenant," he glanced to Aldo, "nor my fellow soldiers, but I happen to be fluent in many languages other than English. French, German, Dutch, 'n' the list goes on" Joshua timidly listed, rubbing his left arm with his right hand."If you still wish for us to cover as German, I could do most o'the talking".

Bridget offered Joshua a fake smile, nodding curtly.

The dogs started barking as Aldo clattered something aside on a table, leaning against it as he kept his eyes on the paper. Finally, he slammed the paper down onto the table in defeat, hand on his hip.

"However, there's something you don't know" Bridget teased, Aldo slowly turning to face her, at that. She grinned, "there've been two recent developments regarding Operation Kino. One, the venue has been changed from The Ritz to a much smaller venue".

Joshua's lips parted, eyebrows knitting together in confusion as he glanced up. He caught Utivich's and Donny's gaze, the three of them exchanging glances of disbelief with each other."Uh, e-enormous changes at the last minute? That's not very Germatic" Joshua pointed out, as he went back to leaning against the wall by the door. 

"Why the hell is Goebbels doing stuff so damn peculiar?" Aldo asked, turning to fully face Bridget.

"It, uhm, it- it probably has something to do with the second development-?" Joshua suggested, a more friendly nod of correction coming from Bridget.

"Which is?".

Bridget sat up."De Führer is attending the premiere" she let out, Joshua's breath hitching.

"Fuck a duck!" Donny cursed, hitting the table Bridget was on.

As the dogs barked, Aldo leaned back against the table, pursing his lips in thought.

"What are you thinking?" Bridget grew curious.

"I'm thinkin’ gettin' a whack at plantin’ old Uncle Adolf makes this horse a different colour" Aldo replied, Joshua nodding along in an understanding manner.

"What is that supposed to mean?" Bridget squinted her eyes in confusion, Aldo turning to Joshua to explain.

"Joshy".

"Yes, uh, yes sir" Joshua nodded, turning to Bridget yet again."It means you gettin' us in that premiere".

"I'm probably going to end up losing this leg" Von Hammersmark hissed, making Joshua flinch in surprise."Bye-bye acting career, fun while it lasted. How do you expect me to walk the red carpet?" She inquired, glaring daggers at Joshua, who was visibly uncomfortable with the anger targeted towards him.

He hugged his elbows, glancing to Aldo for help.

"Easy on my right-hand man Joshua o'er here, it was my idea, blondie" Aldo put his hand up, walking over to Joshua and standing by him protectively."Doggy doc's goin' to dig that slug out ya gam" he snorted, "he's gonna wrap it up in a cast, and you got a good how-I-broke-my-leg-mountain-climbin’ story; that's German, ain't it? Y'all like climbin’ mountains, don't ya?". It was almost laughable, how proud-of-himself Aldo looked at this new plan.

"I don't. I like smoking, drinking, and ordering in restaurants. But I see your point" Bridget nodded sarcastically. She tilted her head, eyes wandering to Aldo's arm around Joshua's waist.

Aldo quickly snuffed some more tobacco, putting his small box away before speaking again."We fill you up with morphine 'til it's comin' out yer ears, and just limp your lil' ass up that rouge carpet" he grinned triumphantly, as if his plan would be able to solve world hunger.

"I know this is a silly question before I ask it, but, can you Americans speak any other language than English?" She asked, leaning back."Asides from 'Joshy' over here-" Bridget coughed, nodding towards Joshua.

"Don't call him Joshy" Aldo growled, his hold on Joshua's grip tightening."I love you" he whispered, against Josh's ear.

The corners of Joshua's lips quirked up into a smile."I love you too, Aldo".

"We both speak a little Italian" Donny piped up, referencing himself and Aldo.

"With an atrocious accent, no doubt. But that doesn't exactly kill us in the crib. Germans don't exactly have a good ear for Italian...You, Joshua, you said to me earlier how you know many languages. What about you?".

Joshua's eyes widened a bit, eyebrows raising at attention."Uh, uhm, well- I, uh, actually..." he turned to Aldo, then Donny, and everyone else, all eyes on him."I was unfortunate enough to not exactly have Italian be a part o'the list o'languages I know".

"Goddammit, Josh, are you serious?" Donny howled.

"Joshy, y'gotta be kiddin' me. You grew up in that fancy mansion of yer's, been learnin' to hunt with guns since you were five, use bombs since you were ten, and learn languages since before all that, and yer tellin' me neither yer mom nor yer pops ever put a lil' Italian in ya?" Aldo exhaled, looking at Joshua, dumbfounded.

Joshua nodded shyly."Mhm. I-I've got almost every other language in my head, you guys. Polish, Hebrew, Welsh, even Spanish, but I doubt that that'd be any at all useful? I got Russian, Portuguese, Japanese, Turkish, too. But no one in m'house spared the light of day for Italian if I was already learnin' Spanish".

Aldo kept his focus on Joshua, trailing his hand up to pat Joshua's shoulder.

"So you mumble Italian-Spanish bullshit and brazen through it, is that the plan?" Bridget gave them a 'you can't be serious' look.

"That's about it" Aldo shrugged.

Bridget nodded, "that sounds good" she mumbled.

"Sounds like shit, what else are we gon' do? Go home?".

"No, that sounds good. If you don't blow it, with that, I can get you in the building...Who does what?" Bridget clarified, looking around.

"Well, I speak the most Italian-" Aldo glanced at Joshua, "so I'll be yer escort. Donowitz speaks the third most, so he'll be yer Italian cameraman. Omar, fourth-most, he'll be Donny's assistant, like Josh'll be mine".

"An escort's assistant-?" Bridget questioned.

"Listen, lady we're in the middle o'some kinda world war with Jews runnin' around and Nazis huntin' after them, destroyin' everything that gets in their way. What's wrong with escorts havin' a lil' extra protection and assistance, huh?" Aldo pointed out.

Omar snapped his head in Aldo's direction, caught off-guard."I don't speak Italian".

"Like I said, fourth-best. Just keep yer fuckin' mouth shut-" Joshua cut Aldo off by snorting, "In fact, why don't you start practicin' right now?" Aldo grinned, looking down at Josh, who was holding back laughter.

[liliisms]

👸 2 k 1 8 review 👸

001. What is your proudest accomplishment of this year? - Getting to make a speech about the power of body image at the Glamour Women of the Year Summit. As proud as I am of Riverdale (and I’m extremely proud), I have always wanted to use my voice for something useful. I’ve struggled with body acceptance my whole life, always self-conscious about my skin or thighs or boobs and it was only with the support from my family and friends that I finally learned how to become comfortable in my own body. Society and the media can be very damaging to young women and men’s self-esteem as they grow throughout the years and I wanted to use my platform to promote loving yourself for exactly who you are, imperfections and all. I’ve always tried to be genuine and true to myself and to get to be able to speak to so many people..well, it was truly a honor and I try to set an example everyday of what it means to love your body and your soul.

002. What is the biggest life lesson you learned this year? - I have the power to take control of how people make me feel. I don’t have to read the hateful comments. I don’t have to watch the videos insulting me and my friends just for them to get views. I can block people and turn away from spiteful people who think they have the right to talk about my life. I don’t owe anything anybody and the only person I should be trying to impress is myself. The minute I stopped caring about what people thought of me and started to live for myself, to make myself happy, is the minute a million of worries flitted away and I felt myself relaxing. I only get one life and I intend to live it the way I see fit.

003. What is one relationship (can be friendship) that has helped you survive this year? - I’m going to be predictable with this answer, but how can I say anybody but Cole @coleffs ? He’s truly been my rock. Not only in the sense of being there from day one of stepping into this crazy industry to learn how to handle the pressures that come with fame, but he’s also always been one hundred percent genuine with me. I’ve never had to be anyone but myself with him and to feel that love from him, to see how much he cared about me with no frills, no glitter, no pretending really helped me to also love myself even more. He’s taught me a lot - how to appreciate life a little deeper, how to take not take myself so seriously when I can get caught up in the little things, how to be patient and breathe when I feel myself trembling in fear of not living up to my potential. He sees the best in me, always and for that, he’s helped me to open myself up so many experiences. Falling in love is the scariest thing you can ever do and yet with him, he made is so easy and effortless. Cole’s been there through late nights, early mornings, crazy outings, quiet walks, and wild chaos and I’ve never seen him as anything other than imperfectly perfect. He’s truly my soul mate and the love of my life and I’d be lost without him.

004. Who or what do you need to let go of in order to make next year even better than this year? - I’m definitely going to focus less on social media and getting caught up in the drama that comes with comments and unwanted opinions, and focus more on the support that comes from the people I love. I also think I need to be more reckless - not in a bad way, but stop thinking about so much what will happen if I don’t make a certain decision and start thinking about what I could gain if I do.

005. What did you do this year that you’ve never done before? - Where do I start? Gone to Hawaii. Rode in a hot air balloon. Flew in a helicopter over mountains and had a picnic a thousand feet in the air. Was on a television soundtrack. I’m a very lucky girl.

006. What are three resolutions or goals you want to make happen next year? - 1) Bring Addy out to LA more, 2) Do more little things for Cole to surprise him, and 3) Try to get more product and business deals about ideas I support and care about.

007. Where did most of your money go this year? - Without a doubt, junk food and skin care products.

008. What song will always remind you of this year? - Can’t Help Falling in Love by Kina Grannis.

009. How will you be spending the last day of this year? - I think my friend Austyn and I are going on a little trip, but I’m not sure yet! I’ve yet to really set anything in stone.

010. Who is the best new person you’ve met this year? - Haley and Kiernan! They’ve really become two of my newest sisters. @hqhaleyluhoo & @keekshipka

–

001. What relationship (can be friendship) has been the most fun to write for your muse/s this year? - For Lili, writing SH with Vic has been incredibly sweet and I’m grateful she was willing to keep their relationship and that she’s stuck with me this long. I’m always waiting with bated breath for really amazing ship partners to drop me but she’s never made me feel anything less than wanted and appreciated, so it just makes the ship that much more precious to me. As for friendships, I always get a kick out of Lili/Saoirse. @irishxseahorse has such a great sense of humor and never fails to make me laugh.

For Keegan, the Treegan relationship wasn’t really a surprise but I was happy with how naturally it developed. You don’t always have chemistry even if your fc’s do in real life but Emily has been such a perfect Troian. Seeing as how I’ve played Troian for the majority of my RP years, I’m very picky with how people play her and Em fits the bill. ;) I love that it’s not rushed, it’s going at a very easy and natural pace, and how willing Emily always is to talk to me and to keep my muse high with cute muse inspo. And for friendships, Keegan/Lizzie! @ohlizzo Be prepared for 2019, Sadie. Keegan’s gonna worm his way into Lizzie’s heart.

And on Munro, I’ve been lucky enough to sort of ship with Vic again with Munro/Cristine. We decided to give them a shot and I love the messy friends with benefits plot. I can’t wait to focus on them more and hopefully do more with them next year. I also really love Munro and Natalia’s friendship. @itsnataliadyr Eena is the actual sweetest and I adore how immediately playful their interactions became. I always look forward to replying to her and love her Natalia.

002. In what ways do you connect to your muse/s? - Out of all of them, I think I connect to Lili the most not only because she’s the only female muse, but also because we’re both fellow Virgos. I’m a big astrology nerd and I believe your sign impacts your personality so I feel like she’s a kindred spirit to me in a way. She’s definitely as impulsive with her words as I am and we both share the same sense of humor. With Keegan, I relate deeply to his sensitivity and his love for cats because I am the biggest cat lady and would have a million cats if I could. He also wears his heart on his sleeve and I do too. And with Munro..he’s probably the muse I have the least in common with but we do share a love for geekdom so that’s fun!

003. What’s your favorite category to write for your muse/s? (angst, fluff, smut, etc.) - I haven’t been able to write much smut here because not everybody is comfortable writing it (which is totally cool) but smut & angst is probably my favorite to write because I feel like that’s where I shine. I don’t know what that says about me but..Those are my top two categories where I get the most compliments on my writing. Obviously fluff is great and we all know I can wax on forever with mushy and sappy stuff..

004. If you could give your muse/s one gift, what would you give them? - I can’t afford anything for them, but if I could, I’d give her the Chipotle black card because she seems to really want it. Or a sponsorship by Dominos. I’d also love to give her a big hug and tell her how much I admire her, and how much her words mean to me. It’s so nice to be a fan of a woman who isn’t afraid to speak her mind and who promotes loving yourself and not being ashamed if you’re a little different from everyone else.

For Keegan, I’d give him notebooks and demand he write more songs and scripts and cast Troian in all of them. I’d also give him another kitten friend because who doesn’t want more kittens?

And for Munro, I’d beg him to get Instagram just so I can know what he’s up to! Seriously though, Munro seems like a simple guy but I’d give him Lion King tickets and then make him go with me so I can hide in his arms when Mufasa dies. NOT READY, NEVER READY.

005. What was your favorite event/moment/memory in HollywoodlandHQ this year? - Is it cheesy if I say when we opened? I was really excited and so proud and I felt like I finally crossed something off my bucket list. I wanted a safe place for the people I loved to create and write. I also loved the Halloween event! Anything a little spooky, I love. 

006. What muse/s have you enjoyed most seeing on this dash this year? - Lizzie is one of my favorites simply because I think Sadie writes her perfectly, and I always love seeing my ship partners on the dash because my stomach gets all fuzzy and I know good things are gonna happen.

007. What is your favorite thing your muse/s have done this year in the group? (can be in the real world or what you made up) - For Lili, it’s been the gift of all the pictures she’s released. She’s gorgeous, she’s real, and I love all the content she blesses us with. I’m also so proud of her work on Riverdale this year. She stepped up her game.

Keegan hasn’t done much but Million Miles Away was a jam and his podcast was great! In the group, I obviously was happy when he finally kissed Troian. ;) @itstbellisario

And Munro seems to have booked a lot of new projects so I’m excited for them to come out. His performance in Knuckleball is INCREDIBLE and just proves how good of an actor he is.

008. What would you like to see in HollywoodlandHQ in 2019? - Apart from events that pair up people who don’t interact much (which seems to be the biggest want), I’d love more themed events. I’d love supernatural!week, AU!week, holiday events, even more events like the earthquake that affects the whole group and not a select group of people. I also love when memes are done, even if we still need to improve on everyone playing them fairly. Memes that set up plots and help further IC drama will be worked on too. And obviously, I really want the group to keep growing! 

009. What is a plot you would love to do with your muse/s? - I’d love to do something dramatic with Lili - she’s clearly got a steady head on her shoulders and I don’t want to make her too OOC, but writing her struggle with something whether that be a relationship with somebody or with herself would be great with character development. 

With Keegan, I’m excited to work out his growing relationship with Troian. I can’t wait to write out all the beginnings of a ship and see what comes from it.

And with Munro, I’d really just like him to have more connections. I’d love to see more Degrassi fc’s in the group but also get him involved with more people. He’s a really goofy guy and he’s also loyal af, so he’d be great for friendship plots. Also, him developing something with Cristine and maybe fucking it up a little would be good drama!

010. Tag somebody in the RP and say something nice about them. It’s the season of giving. - To my fellow admins @diannahq, @elizajanetc, @itsgenevievegnt, @ohlizzo, @sebffs and @hcurly - I love you. I appreciate you SO much. You guys do tireless (and sometimes thankless) work to make this place running and an accepting place for everybody. Thanks for the Discord chats, the support for real life and roleplay, and always willing to step up and make this the greatest damn group in the game.

Katie - Even when I’m married, you’ll have my Netflix and Hulu password. Thanks for being the Lucy to my Troian, the Goose to my Shmian, and the Manny to my Emma. I love you. You’re always there for me, and you’re always keeping me honest and inspire me to be a better person.

KJ - I love you too and thank you for always believing in me and loving me more than I do myself. I can’t wait for another year of friendship with you.

Eena - You’re the best advice giver and the best ear to talk to. You always make me smile and nobody’s softer or kinder than you. I love you, you gentle soul.

Sadie - You’re a woman of mystery but we love you anyways. You’re probably our group mama and you keep us in line. You’re also incredibly supportive and talented.

Laura - I hope to get to know you even better in 2019! You’re always a sweetheart.

Nikki - I love your big heart and your willingness to do whatever to make everyone feel comfortable. You’re too pure for us.

Sam @theflashgrant @yochriswood - I’ve known you for so long and each year, my love for you grows stronger. I love the person you are and the person you’re becoming. You truly inspire me with your strength and if there’s anyone worthy of good things happening to them, it’s you. Thanks for always making me laugh and being there for me. I’m ride or die for you, lady.

My ship partners @coleffs @crisprosperi @itstbellisario - you two keep me inspired to log on here every day and I thank you for putting up with me. I love the relationships we’ve created and I love that you love them as much as I do. Thank you for the muse posts, the songs, the memes, and the IMs. Thank you for also being my friends. I’d be lost without you two. I love our babies and I can’t wait to see what we do in 2019.

Ally @hqmaia - <333333333333 is really all I can say. We may not ship here but 2019 is gonna be great for our ships too. I’m so happy you’re in this group as well!

My fellow Riverdale-ians @hqcami @kjapayo @hqmads @coleffs @hqnessa @ulrichisms - You guys are the greatest pretend co-workers ever. Riverdale forever. <3 Thank you for letting me live out the friendships I love and being so amazing at all of your roles.

And to all of the members, who I consider my family - without you, this group wouldn’t work. You all belong here. You all are safe here. And you all are loved here. Thank you for doing this meme and giving us feedback and spreading positivity. I couldn’t be prouder to be your admin and to write with you. I’m the luckiest RPer ever.

@hwlandhqgossip

[buckyismyaesthetic]

Punk (Chap. 5)

Summary: You’re head over heels for your best friend Bucky and hate the nickname he gave you as it doesn’t exactly scream romance.

Word count: 2942

Warnings: Same as always

A/N:  FYI on Chap. 4 I had to go back and make a minor change bc of a continuity error.  Bucky’s hair is short (think TJ Hammond style) in this fic and i slipped up an put in a man-bun note (it’s my weakness). Sorry!  Now, back to the story….

Abandoning Wanda in your closet to hunt through the mass of new clothes you’d unceremoniously shoved in there earlier, you raced down the floor towards Nat’s room, ready to call the whole night off after that disaster of a dinner.  You rounded the corner and attempted to stop short but your socks had no grip and you crashed into a wall of muscle.  “Sorry, Sam,” you mumbled.  “You okay?” Sam laughed and steadied you back on your feet.

You heard Bucky snort from behind and winced. Great, he’d just seen you stuff your face full of Chow Mein and apple pie and now he caught you hurdling down the hallway like the giant boulder from Indiana Jones.  “He’s fine,” Bucky clapped him on the back.  “Not even you could crack this thick skull.”  

And with that he pulled Sam’s sweatshirt hood over his eyes and gave him a noogie before guffawing like a doofus and racing past you with Sam hot on his heels.

“Ay yo!  What the hell’s that mean?!” he hollered.  “And don’t touch my hair, man!”  Sam’s voice carried down the hallway as he chased your best friend.  A loud thud and muffled ‘ooof’ confirmed that he’d caught up to him and apparently rugby tackled him in the living room.

What does that mean? You asked yourself, thinking back to what Bucky’d said. ‘Not even you…’  What? Is that, like a fat thing?  Like yeah, you’re clearly big and round and wrecking ball shaped so one might think that you’d be able to smash Sam’s bird brain like melon but…what?  Or like, you’re almost, not quite, rhino sized but if you keep going for a lil’ bit longer you’ll get there?    

You shook your head angrily at yourself.  No, Bucky doesn’t think those things.  You think those things.  The nasty little gremlin in your head who stood over your shoulder when you looked in the mirror and parroted nasty thoughts and held a magnifying glass to every flaw.  But what if all of the terrible things you thought were true.  And what if Bucky could see them?  What if everybody could see them?  What if they all whispered about it behind your back saying, “Poor Y/N, no wonder she’s alone.  Look at her.  She’s so fat and ugly.  Too big to be desired.”  Just the thought of what the others might secretly think of you made your heart clench painfully.

Moving on autopilot as those nasty thoughts swirled around in your head, you found yourself standing gloomily in front of Natasha’s room.  You twisted the handle and swung the door open, ready to declare defeat for a night that hadn’t even started, but you pulled up short at the sight before your eyes.

Clint and Natasha were standing in a passionate embrace next to the redhead’s bed.  Her arms were wrapped around his neck while his hands cradled her face.  They moved slowly, lost in the moment of being together and kissing so intimately.  You leaned against the doorframe watching them for a minute.  That was what you wanted with Bucky.  To be held close like he couldn’t get enough of you.  To pour your heart into a kiss and have it returned tenfold.    You sighed softly at their love.  Seeing them, two people who deserved love more than anything, well, you’d admit to turning into a big old mush.  They were your OTP.  You shipped ‘em—hard.  

Nat pulled away from Clint’s, her lips brushing his as she spoke.  “We know you’re there,” she said, not looking at you.  

Clint smiled against her lips and you couldn’t help the goofy grin spreading across your face at his actions.  “Hey, Y/N.”

“Hi guys.  Sorry,” you smiled sheepishly.  And suddenly you remembered.  “Oh shit! Sorry.  You’re sayin’ bye! I’ll just—I’ll come back.  Fuck, I’m sorry—”

“It’s fine, kiddo,” Clint replied stepping away from Natasha slightly to look at you.  “I don’t leave until 5am anyway.”  He, Thor, and Vision were leaving for New Mexico on a mission. Something about drug cartels or the Roswell incident…you hadn’t been listening at dinner and, admittedly, you knew like two things about New Mexico…was the Grand Canyon there?  Or in Arizona?…Nevada?  Note to self: Google shit later.

The archer moved to the bed to pack more things into his go-bag.  He looked down at his watch, prompting you to go the same.  10:30.  Shit.  “Alright, you two, about this ‘girls nite’,” he adopted his ‘serious’ voice and glanced between you and Nat, which only made you snicker and Nat roll her eyes.  Clint ignored you both and continued.  “You,” he pointed to Nat.  “Do not kill anyone.  Drunk men hitting on you deserve to be maimed, not murdered.”  

“What if they touch me?” Nat teased.  “Is violence permitted then?”

Clint pretended to think about it.  “As an Avenger, I frown upon it.  As your boyfriend?…well, just don’t get caught, babe.”  He gave her a playful wink which made her grin devilishly.  “And you,” he rounded onto you.

“‘Be Natasha’s alibi,” you replied with a little goody-two-shoes sass.  “Have the getaway car ready to go with fake passports in the glove department—”

“No setting anything on fire, no starting bar fights, no ritual Satanic sacrifices of any kind,” he spoke over you, ticking off his fingers,  and you weren’t sure how he managed to keep a straight face because you’re cheeks were puffed trying to keep gales of laughter from pouring out.  

“I make no promises,” you snickered.

“And try not to break any hearts while you’re out there, kid.”  He gave you wink.

“Ugh, okay, that one I can promise.”  You rolled your eyes.

Nat, having moved to the closet to collect an outfit and some makeup, materialized at you side.  She leaned in to whisper in your ear while Clint was distracted rolling a pair of socks into tiny all for his bag.  “I know that look, Y/N.  We’re not cancelling.  You’ll be fine.  It’ll be fun.”

Blast her and her stupid spidey senses!  How could she possibly know that you were planning on backing out and spending the remainder of the evening playing Call of Duty and drinking cocoa?  Nat hooked her arm through yours, leaned in to give Clint another kiss goodbye before warning him to come back to her safe and sound, and then marched you back towards your room where you were subjected to the tortuous task of making yourself look half way decent to be seen in public.

Tears were shed.  Curses were thrown.  Friendships abolished.  Mortal wounds were inflicted.  But, in the end, Wanda and Natasha had managed to get you dressed for the club.  They assured you over and over that you looked stunning in the three quarter sleeve, tea length dress but you honestly didn’t see it.  You felt exposed and vulnerable and kept tugging at the hem to pull it further down, fearing that your cellulite was on display and that with every step people could see your underwear.  And you weren’t used to wearing things that were so….form-fitting. You normally wore boys clothes.  Baggy sweaters with sleeves so long that you could curl your fingers around the edges.  T-shirts with graphics and movie quotes, images from your favourite fandoms.  Your socks never matched and usually had pictures of pizza slices or dinosaurs.  And your feet were usually kept nice in warm in combat boots or chucks.  None of this ‘stilettos’ crap.

Speaking of which.  “I feel like Bambi on ice, Wanda,” you whined as your ankles wobbled with each step in the ‘fuck me pumps’ Nat had smashed onto your toes.

“Stop complaining,” she replied.  “You look amazing.”  She whipped her phoned in front of you, forcing you to take a selfie with her.  You grimaced. Having your photo taken was one of your least favourite things.  You’d much rather take the photo than be in it.  She could put one of those pretty filters on it at least.  Something that got rid of your double chin and deemphasized the asymmetry of your face.  Preferably, a filter that evened out the plethora of skin tones your face was fond of sporting despite MACs best effort to conceal everything.   And even with all that expensive make up on you felt ugly. Like a clown and a liar.  This isn’t me.  This is a mask…Like a villain from Scooby Doo…

“Get outta here with that!”  You pushed the camera away and focused on not tripping on the sidewalk.  

“Are we there yet?”

“Yes,” Nat groaned stopping in front of a door. You had asked her that question about eleven times in the fifteen minute walk from the tower to the club.  And when you had protested and wanted to take a cab she said “you need practice walking in those heels” in her stupid, know-it-all voice.  She was right.  You did need practice.  Also. You needed new feet!  You were surely bleeding.  They’d have to be cut off.  Why the fuck do girls wear these things?!

The heavy bass music from the club assaulted your ears as the bouncers let you pass.  The lights were dimmed out over the dance floor but the bar was light up and crowded as people shark swarmed the bartenders, waving money for drinks.  

“Breathe,” Nat whispered in your ear.  She must’ve seen your eyes go wide as you took in the mass of beautiful people before you.  Women were decked out in short dresses, five inch heels, tits up and out looking like Victoria’s Secret models.  And…where they casting the next Magic Mike movie in here?  All of these guys looked like they’d stepped out of an Abercrombie Catalogue.  Where were the average looking people?  Where were the normal, regular shaped folk who didn’t look photo-shopped to perfection? What kinda club was this?

Why were all of these girls either short and petite or model tall and waifish?  It made you feel like Shrek.  Oh, fuck.  My dress is green.  Greaaaaat.  You crossed your arms over your stomach in attempt to make yourself feel smaller.  I don’t like this, I don’t like this, I don’t like this…

“You okay?”  Wanda handed you a cocktail.  

“Yeah, fine.  Good.  I’m good.” Do.  Not. Hyperventilate.  

She knew you were lying.  She was Wanda after all.  Why you even bothered was a mystery…probably just natural instinct; when in doubt, lie your ass off.  “Come on, you see anyone you like?  You can practice talking to boys here.”

“Yeah, that’s perfect.  Pick a guy an’ practice what you’d want to say if he were Bucky,” Nat pipped in as she sipped her martini.  Just the thought of pretending to flirt with Bucky had your stomach in knots.

“I dunno.  It seems mean.  Flirtin’ with someone and just, I dunno.  Not likin’ ‘em,” you shouted over the beat.  “And I don’t even know what I’m doing anyway.  ”

“Just go over to,” Nat twirled around gathering intel of the men by the bar, “that guy.”  With a jut of her chin she pointed out a cute, stocky guy with short, light brown hair.  

“No, he’s—he’s probably not interested.  I don—I don’t wanna bother him,” you stammered. You could feel sweat gathering on your back and cursed under your breath.  Now that you were here, you didn’t think you could do this.  Sure, it sounded great in your head.  Practice makes perfect.  But what if this guy rejected you…like Bucky would…what if his face twisted with revulsion as you approached him? What is he just stares at you thinking ‘Great, the ugly chick is talking to me’?  No, you can’t handle that!  Rejection like that would kill you, you just knew it.  

You tugged on your neckline, fanning yourself. It was getting too hot in here; your face was flushed and every square inch of skin felt hot and clammy.  There was no way you could flirt with Bucky!  You couldn’t even flirt with Joe Schmo over there! But you had begged Nat to help you, recruited Wanda into the plan, interrupted their evenings. Backing out now wasn’t really an option.

The guy at the bar turned and happened to catch you staring at him during your mental freak out.   Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck!  Stop looking! You, rather uncooly, averted your eyes and turned to re-join Nat and Wanda’s conversation only to see them slinking away from you.  Natasha mouthed ‘go!’ and pointed towards the bar while Wanda gave you an apologetic shrug and allowed herself to be lead off into the throng of dancing bodies.  Spinning quickly back to face the bar, hoping your face wasn’t frozen in mortification, you found your target.  The guy was still there with his friends.

So, you had two options: 1) stand in the middle of club, alone, looking like an idiot, or 2) go talk to that guy and make a fool of yourself.  Both sounded equally horrifying but right now you felt like every single eye in the club was on you, and not in a good way.  This is how the gladiators must’ve felt before they were eaten by lions, you mused.  Seeking the shelter of the bar, you meandered through a mob of people and forced yourself to go over to the him.

He was slightly shorter than you with your heels on, a small problem to some people, but to you, well, it made you feel like the Jolly Green Giant.  Guys liked girls who were tiny.  Little.  Small enough to pick up and carry around.  They want to be the big, brave protectors.  Your physique didn’t exactly allow for that, at least not with this dude.  But if Natasha saw you walk over here and not even attempt to flirt with him, she’d flay you alive; you liked your skin where it was thankyouverymuch.

You swirled the drink in your hand, trying to hype yourself up to make your move.  Aha!  Liquid courage!  Downing the glass in two quick gulps, you slammed it back down on the bar.  This caught the guy’s attention and you froze like a deer in headlights.  Line?  Line? What’s my line?

“Hey,” he said.

Oh thank god. “Hi.”

  Flirting should be a college course.  People should have to pass tests or get board certified before being permitted to attempt making advances on civilians. Why the hell don’t they teach these things in school?  What were you supposed to do with your hands?  Do you touch his arm?  What if he doesn’t like that?  Your dress doesn’t have pockets to jam them in—clearly a design flaw—and you’d already dropped two straws on the floor as you fiddled with them nervously.  

After the standard introductory greeting where you learned that his name was Ethan, you both lapsed into a silence which you assumed was becoming unbearably uncomfortable and, being the awkward turtle that you were, felt the need to fill it.

“So, uh,” you bumbled.  “D’you—” Don’t ask “d’you come here often?”! “—d’you…have…a…job?” Ohmygod kill me.

Ethan laughed and proceeded to tell you about accounting.  It went right over your head, like anything math related did.  But you smiled and nodded in what you hoped were all the right places.  And that was how it went.  An odd, uncomfortable conversation where you felt like you were conducting an interview and somehow intruding on his life.  He was perfectly polite, but you couldn’t tell if he was even interested let alone flirting, hell, you couldn’t even tell if you were flirting, or if he was just being a nice guy and putting up with the unsightly, annoying chick crashing his night out .  Luckily, your rescue came in the form of a cute little witch asking you to go dance.

“Nice to meet you,” you waved to Ethan as you followed Wanda into the chaos of the dance floor.  “Thanks, Wan.  I was dying out there.  This isn’t really my thing.”  Wanda rolled her eyes in amusement and tried to get you to gyrate your hips to the beat, but you merely stepped back.  “This isn’t my thing either.”  You were a dorky dancer; you danced to the Spice Girls, Mambo No.5, N’SYNC.  You head banged to Motely Crew, rapped to 50 Cent and Eminem.  You were not Beyoncé or Shakira.  You did not have sexy hip swivels; you did not drop it like it was hot. If you dropped it, it stayed down and shattered like Humpty Dumpty.

“How’d it go?”  Natasha walked up behind you and you quickly informed her of your less than stellar performance.  “Aw, it’s okay.  You just need to keep tryin’!  You didn’t burst into flames, Y/N.  He didn’t shove you away or look at you like you were something stuck to the bottom of his shoe,” she parroted back your earlier concerns.  “You can do this!  C’mon. Let’s find someone else.  You pick.”

Natasha gripped your shoulders and spun you about, forcing you to dance, and making you laugh in turn.  “Okay, okay!” you gave in.  She was sort of right after all.  That guy didn’t run screaming from the club when you went to talk to him. Maybe you could do this.

The darkness of the dancefloor didn’t really let you see anyone clearly so you angled yourself so that the people by the bar were in view.  “Okay, I pick—” Just then the crowd parted like the red sea and there he was, looking effortlessly gorgeous, like he’d been carved from marble and blessed by Aphrodite herself, leaning against a stool occupied by a very beautiful woman—“Bucky.”

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