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#so I'm setting a boundary
celestiastarshine · 18 days
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For the Record, I feel uncomfortable if you're just following me to rebloop your donation posts, or to regularly keep tabs on my accounts. I'll rebloop mutual aid posts here if they're legit, but I want people to follow me because they like my content I make. Not because I rebloop that person's posts regularly. I just don't want to feel used.
If you're following me just to get your donation posts reblooped on the regular, I might have to block you. I don't like being used at all. And if you're following me just for this, I feel like I'm being used.
(Also I'm not really able to donate money for posts. So if you keep bugging me about your mutual aid posts or directly ask for money, I'll block you.)
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After doing some digging via wikis and lps I've decided even if I incorporate Characters from hphl ( Imelda, Garrett ect) I'm gonna ignore the Goblin rebellion completely.
I'm possibly ignoring the entire plot for Theo because I came up with her before the game was released but for any other hphl I'm nixing the Goblin stuff.
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inkskinned · 2 years
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there are a lot of posts out there that are positive and healthy coping mechanisms for handling the holidays. this is not one of them :)
i think there's like. going to be times in your life you will be stuck in a social situation that you cannot escape from gracefully. i do not know why the internet doesn't believe these times exist. it's not always just that your physical safety is at risk - sometimes it's legit like "i just don't currently have the energy or time to put in the effort of responding to this." sometimes it's a coworker you hate so much. sometimes it's just like, fine, you know? like you know you can handle your aunt when she's cheerily horrible, but if you actually set a boundary around her, it's going to be weeks of fallout with your father.
i don't know why people think the answer is always just "cut them out!" or "don't let them get away with that!" because ... the real world is tricky and complicated. i think kind of a lot of us have an internal "radiation poisoning" meter for certain people. like - i'm talking about the ones who are absolutely giving you gradual ick damage. like, you can handle them, but you'll be exhausted.
and yes. you absolutely should listen to your therapist and the good posts about handling others and set good boundaries and take care of yourself. prioritize peace.
HOWEVER :) ...... since im often in a situation with a Gradual Sense of Ick person i cannot just "cut out" of my life (without losing someone else precious to me) - i have sort of developed the most. maladaptive form of mischief possible. because like, if i'm going to have to listen to this shit again, i like to have a little bit of private fun with it.
now! again, i am physically safe, just mentally drained by this man. you should only do this with people you are not in danger with. which leads me to my suggestions for when your Unfortunate Acquaintance shows up and says oh everyone pay attention to me.
my favorite word is "maybe!" said as brightly and happily as possible. whenever the Horrible Person starts in on a topic you do not want to go further with, particularly if they make a claim that you know to be inaccurate, do not respond to it. you and i have both tried to actually argue with this person, and it hasn't gone well, because this person just wants the drama of an argument. however, "maybe!" gives them literally nothing to go on. it is incredibly disarming. they are used to people having some response. they know they can't prove what they're saying, and maybe! treats them like the child they are. it dismisses them in the politest way possible.
i like to say maybe! and then, in their stunned silence, immediately change the subject. this is because i have adhd and i will have something unrelated to talk about, but if you can't think of topics fast enough, i recommend just pointing to something and saying, "isn't that lovely?" because fuck you let's bring in some positivity.
by the way. that second trick - of pointing to something and stating an opinion about it? - that just works on its own, like, 70% of the time. i picked it up from teaching preschoolers. it's an intentional "redirect". it stops children crying and it also stops grown adults from finishing their explanation on why women belong in kitchens. dual wielding!
keep it silly for yourself. i absolutely do not care if people think i'm fucking stupid (it's more fun if they do) and as a result i will purposefully misunderstand things just to see how long it takes them to realize i've completely removed them from the subject at hand. when they say "women aren't funny" i get to be like. "which women." "all women." "all women in america?" "no in the world." "like the mole people? the people in the world?" "what? no. like, alive." "oh are we not counting the mole people?" "what the fuck are you talking about." "you don't believe in the mole people?"
similarly, i play a personal game called "one up me." my Evil Acquaintance literally knows this game exists (my family & friends caught onto it and now also play it) and it always fucking gets him. i don't know why. you have to be willing to be a little free-spirited on this one, though. the trick is that when they make one of those horrible little bigoted or annoying comments they are always making, you need to go one unit weirder. not more intense, mind you - just more weird. "you don't look good in that dress." "yeah, actually, my other dress was covered in squid ink due to a mishap at the soup store." "you shouldn't wear such revealing clothes." "wait, what? oh shit. sorry, your son tears off strips when no one is looking and eats them. i swear it was longer before we left the building."
the point of "one up me" is to completely upend this person's narrative. we both know this person likes setting up situations where you cannot "win" and then they really like telling other people how badly you handled it. in a usual situation, if you respond "please don't say something that rude", you're a bitch. but if you let it happen, you're letting yourself be debased. they are not usually expecting door number three: unflappably odd. because what are they going to say when they're telling everyone how badly you behaved? "she said my son eats her dresses" ".... okay?"
if you can, form an allyship with someone whomst you can tagteam with. where they can pick up on your weird "soup store" story and run with it.
the following phrase is amazing and can be deployed for any situation: "oh, be nice :) it's the holidays!" i do not know why this works as often as it does. i'll say it for the most random shit. i think this is bc most of the time these people know they're being impolite, they just like to fight.
godbless. when in doubt, remember that you could always start stealing their pens.
the whole point of this is - if you can't escape. maybe see how long you can just be. like. a horrible little menace.
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elvisqueso · 3 months
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"Alright...let's go talk to your father."
Pocahontas (1995)
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brucewaynehater101 · 4 months
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Just want to ask do you think that Tim would rather shatter his own soul just to save everyone?
Mhmm. He would chip it away piece by piece as he whittled it down to a size that's invisible to the naked eye.
Then he'd whip out a microscope and keep carving away. What use does he have for a soul when he can protect his loved ones for a day more?
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horrorshow · 2 years
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He'll keep us tap dancing forever, and I can't live like that, man! I can't live like that! I won't! // So, screw destiny right in the face.
Dean Winchester | favorite quote
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For reference if you're a non Warcraft fan or haven't been keeping up with WoW, Warcraft has blatantly racially coded fantasy races like the trolls have jamaican accents, wear tiki masks and grass skirts, and practice voodoo in Jungles, whilst the tauren (Minotaurs) have feather headdress, smoke peace pipes, have totem poles and tepees, ETC.
Warcraft's so called new "woke" writers have doubled down on the "PoC coded monsters are evil" stuff with the very few good characters from those races being depicted as the "good ones" because they reject the savage ways of their people and side with white humans.
They've also whitewashed any bad actions from white characters.
Around the same time, Mathias Shaw was confirmed as gay, we got 2021's Shadowlands where:
There was a story with the pure and good white colonizers vs the completely evil savage natives that deserved to be wiped out because they didn't want to share.
Confirmation that the gods that the white races worshipped were real, whilst the gods of the tauren and other PoC coded races were fake.
An afterlife where all spirits are converted to bodies resembling caucasian humans.
A POC coded character (Zul'jin) that fought against the white colonizers that stole his land and treat his people as vermin to be exterminated, being one of the only characters being sent to Hell, whilst white characters whom did far worse weren't.
Real world revered voodoo loa Dambala being depicted as a God of evil that players are sent to kill.
So I think more people should've voted negatively on Mathias Shaw because whilst the character himself isn't racist, he's closely associated with horrible racist writing that thought throwing a white gay character in to their broke ass script script would somehow make it "woke".
I encourage people to interpret the poll options in whatever way they want, whether that's the character's writing, the strength of the representation, or their overall feelings on the media. I've talked about this before, but at the end of the day I am not trying to be an arbiter of what media is good and what's not, because I am simply not qualified to be. I sincerely appreciate when people send in asks like this detailing the issues with a piece of media so that other people can be more aware in the future. All posts like this are tagged with "media critical"!
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robo-dino-puppy · 3 months
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hunter-killer
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televisionenjoyer · 1 month
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I've never kissed with tongue can you guys explain this to me like I'm five. where do the tongues go what do they even. It has always confused me.
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finisnihil · 6 months
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Hey guys can somebody like help me figure something out
So i've seen people ship Gallagher and Sunday which is weird to me because during the quest Gallagher calls him "my brother" like "brother" is even bolded
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And we know Sunday and Robin are adopted so I was like well shit he could be his sibling but then Sunday says this:
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Which implies Gallagher is an imposter right and maybe not actually his brother? Gallagher follows this revelation up by saying he underestimated Sunday.
Gallagher's voicelines don't help at all either
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They're very clinical and distant.
I just wanna know like are they siblings or is Gallagher lying? I'm really confused and just wanna know so I know how to interact with the shipping content and avoid another Ragbros situation (who I don't ship, Kaeluc shippers begone you are not welcome) because that's a headache already.
Also please be civil thanks
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dumplingsjinson · 11 months
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Let me just uh, set some hard fucking boundaries with some of you people in regards to MY relationship.
Do not keep questioning my choices on MY relationship.
First of all, you're not in this relationship. Let me mess up and find out, if worse comes to worst. Let me fuck around and find out. I'm not going to blame you for not warning me, don't worry. Seriously. So stop questioning me.
Don't keep asking me, "Why don't you label things with him? I think it's bullshit that there are no labels. What's the POINT of this relationship if you're not labelled as such and such? You're just wasting your time. Stop that. It's weird. This doesn't seem right to me. Why call it exclusive if there's no labels?"
Let me fucking date how I want, damn. Let me be in a goddamn relationship how I want, without me needing to explain myself to you. You, who I don't even know. You, who's not even a mere acquaintance of mine. Even my friends aren't questioning me, so who are YOU to question me when you know virtually NOTHING about our relationship?
Why are YOU, as someone who doesn't know the full fucking picture, trying to enforce your rigid little rules onto ME? If you like labels and only commit strictly with someone once those labels are established, good for you! Do you!
But don't go on the internet, read the stuff someone shares (which doesn't paint the whole picture, mind you, because I'm not sharing my whole goddamn life biography on here) and then go running into their inbox and yell at them for their choices, or because their choices differs from yours. Don't do that because you don't KNOW them. Don't act like you know everything from the small details you've read. Yes, I share things on here, but only things I'm comfortable sharing. Surface level shit, basically.
What you think is normal isn't always someone else's normal. Please remember that.
The way some of you act in my inbox... It's embarrassing at best and disgustingly rude and kind of intrusive and also insulting at worst. And because you've got the anon feature on, you think you can just say anything. (That's a whole other rant I've been wanting to get off my chest. I've got a few drafts I've never posted that are from months ago lmfao).
Now, to tone down the aggressiveness for a fraction of as second, I get you care about me and it's probably coming from a good place, but I am TWENTY. THREE.
Let me remind you.
TWENTY THREE.
Not three.
Not thirteen.
TWENTY. FUCKING. THREE.
I can make my own decisions. I am a legal adult, probably moreso than some of you out here coming into my inbox and full on trying to start an interrogation with me like I did something wrong for wanting to do things MY way for MY relationship.
And SLIGHTING me for my choices is where I'm setting the hard boundary at.
DO NOT, and I repeat:
DO NOT...
...under any circumstances, come into my inbox and act like I'm a dumb fucking bitch. (I am a dumb fucking bitch, but I'm also a self aware dumb fucking bitch. There's a difference.)
I know what I'm doing, I know the consequences, I know what I'm in for. I'm not fucking stupid and naive. I'm not a 13 year old about to start her first relationship with her high school crush.
So stop treating me like a donkey, and stop questioning my choices. Remember, as harsh as this sounds, some of you need to hear this and REALISE this: You've got no place in my life to do that. Absolutely fucking none.
Learn to read the room and learn that there are lines that shouldn't be crossed.
OH, I need to add this here. Before some of you come into my inbox and ask me WHY I'm sharing shit if I'm not open to opinions on my choices... There's a difference between opinions and civil discussions, and crossing someone's boundaries and questioning their choices because you think YOUR way of doing things is the right way to do things.
Just because I share some stuff on here doesn't mean that warrants you an automatic pass to shit on my choices. Fuck that bullshit, because that's just shitty behaviour and you need to look inwards and realise you're doing a lot more harm than good by being a piece of shit to someone you essentially do not know.
Remember, if you won't say this shit to someone in real life while looking them in the eyes, then don't fucking say it on anon in some stranger's inbox. That's a dick move, and you're a prick if you do that. Fix yourself, for the sake of humanity.
That is all.
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slusheeduck · 1 month
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I want a ten years later revival that has Bill being just as terrible but now he uses Therapy Speak
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kissingonclouds · 3 months
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raymond shields also!!!
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tate-lin · 2 years
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Jason Todd is my favourite character in all of DC but:
If someone doesn't want to kill, you can't ask, tell, or expect them to kill for you
Or, you can, but you'd be a complete asshole. The only time those expectations are valid is when a person signed up for a job where killing is expected (e.g. the military).
But as we all know, Batman is not the military nor the police. He only has one rule—or only one rule he truly cares about—and that's to not kill.
And frankly, I don't care what his reasons are for that; the bottom line is that he doesn't want to kill and we should respect it. Because at the end of the day, when you take a life, you're the one who's fully responsible for it. You're the one who has to live with it. And because of that, nobody should force you to do it.
Look, like I said, Jason Todd is my favourite character too. But that doesn't mean I don't find it disturbing or unfair when he expects Bruce, and only Bruce, to kill the Joker for him.
Do I find it understandable and human? Of course! Jason died horribly and gruesomely to a madman who'd do the same to anyone else so long as he finds it funny enough. It's only natural for him to want and expect someone—especially his father, the one he loved the most and the one he'd been searching through the thin crack of the door for even as the countdown struck zero—to put an end to the clown permanently, but. Does that mean he should? Absolutely not, and I think it's straight-up awful that so many people in this fandom encourage this take.
And the kicker is, if Catherine was still alive, if Catherine was the sort to become a vigilante and this happened to the both of them, do you think Jason would have the same expectations for her? I bet not. Not because he's sexist, but because Bruce is Batman and we take Batman for granted.
Yeah, you heard me. We take him for granted. We expect too much out of him.
This has been a slow-coming realisation, but it comes after a particularly harrowing conversation with my sister during which she told me that I was taking her for granted and I surprised myself by agreeing with her. I won't go into the nitty gritty details but what I took away from the conversation was that just because someone can do something, and you yourself would do that something for them, that does not mean you should automatically expect them to do the same for you—especially if it goes against their character and what they stand for.
This goes the same for Bruce. Just because he's capable of murder and is justified in doing it, that does not mean that he should do it if he doesn't want to. And just because Jason would do it for him if the reverse happened, that still does not mean he should do it if he doesn't want to (which Bruce would have never asked for anyway because that's just not part of his character). No matter their similarities, Jason and Bruce are two completely different people and they can't be expected to do and choose the same things.
Batman, of course, chooses to take responsibility for many, many things, most of which are completely optional. He's a billionaire, he doesn't have to help his city by spending his nights saving people, facing the worst the city has to offer, and risk his life and sanity on the daily. He's the CEO of one of the most wealthy companies in the world, he doesn't have to uplift his city by donating to orphanages, hospitals, and charities, creating programmes to help the youth, the poor, the disabled, ex-convicts, and other minorities, as well as funnel any struggling person he encounters to his company so that they can be assured of a job. He was a single and free man, he didn't have to agree to care for several angry, reckless, and bitter kids with death in their hearts.
All of the shit he does is completely optional! Yet, the one thing he explicitly chooses not to do, the one thing he absolutely refuses to take responsibility for and takes great pains to avoid, is killing.
And I get it, this is murder we're talking about here. You can't just expect people to be just okay with doing that, even if that person is a demented dude in a bat costume.
Actually, why are we expecting so much out of such a person? Cause Batman can do anything? Cause Jason is his son and Gotham is his city? Cause if given half a chance, we wouldn't let Jason down? Cause if something happened to us, we hope that we mattered enough to someone for them to avenge us, no matter if doing so would completely destroy them? Tear them apart from the inside-out? No matter that we're already dead and they'd have to live the rest of their lives like that?
Just something to think about.
At any rate, I think it's wrong to look at someone and expect them to kill for you. If Gotham wants Joker gone, they're just gonna have to do it themselves cause expecting a volunteer to do this extra shit they never asked for and explicitly does not want to do is more than just appalling.
It's cruel.
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allygatoor · 3 days
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i think it's time that we as a society realized that actually eternals wasn't bad it was just not standard marvel fare and that's okay
#maybe i'm biased#it is my favorite marvel movie after all#but i truly think so much of the hate was that it was a diverse cast with overtly pro-choice messaging that freaked marvel fans out#is it flawed? yes. but all marvel movies are#but something about that found family and cast and creative team that clearly cared deeply about the story they were telling really got me#there was so much care put into the making of it!#lauren ridloff (makkari) made name signs for all the characters because she is actually deaf and wanted to make the film good representatio#and all the cast learned basic sign language so they could talk to her on and off the set#it's so unlike every other marvel movie and that's why i love it#it's not afraid to push boundaries and be strange and make mistakes#and i'm so sad that it will never get a sequel because there was so much potential for those characters and their stories#i wanted to see makkari and druig realize they love each other#i wanted to see them deal with the fallout of their actions#i wanted to see the family fracture and then see them all find their way back to each other#i wanted to see more queer representation in a character of color whose whole story wasn't all about being queer and isn't just a cameo#i wanted more!#and i'm not afraid to admit it!#maybe it would have been better as a tv show but i dunno. i switch thoughts about that a lot#i think the alternating timeline was really interesting and kept me engaged the whole time but i am definitely in the minority for that one#but i also don't like endgame so. you know. maybe i can't be trusted#anyway that was a whole ass essay#if you read all that hope you enjoyed. drink some water. give yourself a pat on the back. i love you.#the eternals#marvel#drukkari
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lungfuls · 20 days
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Maybe I'm projecting and being hopeful but I mentioned to M that I don't even get to shit by myself in peace lmao and I feel like something clicked for him. Bc I was like hey, at least you get private bathroom breaks at work (noncombative). And since then he's been a lot more acquiescent when I ask if I can nap and stuff
#he's never rly said no he just used to be like 'well whaf if i want to nap' like in the early parenting days#which evolved into 'yeah i guess'-type responses#lately he's more like 'yeah!' like his tone is less. whatever it was before#same with any requests i make in general like if he'll put e down for bed and stuff#idk my weird episode epiphany thing i went through last week has me feeling much less patient and self-questioning#it's just a fact that constantly asking myself if i'm being considerate enough of others has done nothing for me#like it hasn't even improved my relationships.. i don't really have any lol#like i'm done biting my tongue bc idk if i've properly considered their perspective.. i end up blowing up at minor things as a result anyway#like it makes me a worse partner fr#i also really feel like i've been putting daggers thru my own spirit by doing this for so long#like i need to stop troubleshooting my existence like 'what if i conform this way' 'what if i conform that way'#here's what if: you will be profoundly unhappy and no one who you love will truly know you#this is such a tangent off what i started talking about but basically i'm done reflexively wondering#every time i feel wronged disrespected etc. if actually i'm the one in the wrong. it really is reflexive#the way m's mom responded to me setting a boundary was a wake up call like apparently she just read into what i was saying too much#so hypothetically it wasn't the boundary she was angry about but how she thought i set it#but like i don't have any time for you if my extremely sincere and straightforward communication isn't good enough for you#like i'm not going to be understanding of your inability to take me at face value we didn't both fuck up. You did#and that's how i'm going to act. like You fucked up. yk
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