#sixxter

[kingsofsleaze]

Every fkn time

[elamoresinsolito-blog]

Mystery Love, fanfiction by NahidTheRipper

Hello to all the SIXXTERS who are reading me for the first time. My name is Nahid, I've been writing here on this blog for years, I love doing it too. I know that English is not my native language, I only dedicate myself to writing beautiful love stories pure and proper and fictitious. I hope you like it and more will come soon thanks to those who follow me daily on instagram @theharem_ofsixx

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Mystery love

 nikki and john5

 nikki pov

 I was totally captivated by his presence, his way of speaking, his way of playing the guitar. I'm a son of a bitch, so many years of relationship with Tommy in the face of all the adversity we've been through and me thinking about this new boy.

I don't know what's wrong with me but I hear him talk and I look at his lips and I want to grab him and kiss him. As simple as that.

The other night when we shared a dressing room, while John went to shower, I looked at his dresser, his makeup, his collection is really spectacular.

When he arrived he saw me that I was putting makeup on my eyes with a black pencil. He laughed.

 John5: just slow down, you're going to hurt yourself.

Nikki: (in surprise) I had been staring at his milky white body. That skin so luminous and so perfect. I can play that nothing to envy a woman. Obviously I forgot the advice he gave me. I left his dresser, walked away a bit and went to get a glass of water.

Returning to the place, I see how John was putting on perfume and immediately afterwards he grabs a small can of aerosol glitter and begins to put it on his neck and pectorals.

I saw how those iridescent glitters in lilac, pink and little stars were sticking to his skin.

Then he began to put on makeup, and at the end he put an oily gloss on his lips that apparently gave him some volume.

Really perfect. I looked at the time on my cell phone and I had 10 missed calls from Tommy and 5 WhatsApp calls.

 I grabbed my Blazer, gave John a chaste little kiss on the forehead, and left. He just smiled and I died at that moment.

 After the show.

 John5: Nikki what are you going to do now?

Nikki? For now, bath first, hahaha why?

John5: I wanted to know if you wanted to come to a party with me?

Nikki: I'd love to, but I have plans with Tommy. If you had told me before yes.

John5: well, no problem (I smiled) I'm going to take a shower, can you help me choose what I can wear?

Nikki: yes obviously no problem. So we share the shower? (looking at him wickedly)

John5: uh good.

Nikki pov: this boy is a sweet please, he can't have such a cute and buying smile for every answer.

 I turned on the shower and you could hear from the next room "love bites by Def leppard"

 And we were face to face sensually taking our clothes off to the music.

I began to gently massage John's back with a liquid soap with a nice citrus fragrance. He was totally flinched at my touch. And this was having a certain effect on me.

To which I hurried, I turned it around again being face to face. I grabbed his small hips and I swear to god I ate his mouth with a kiss.

 john5 pov

 Immediately tears and sobs came out during that beautiful and lustful kiss.

I had no choice but to climb and hold tight to his hip with my legs.

We parted from the kiss and I whispered into her ear "please penetrate me, I'm done in ten minutes"

 Nikki: Well, what do you want, just the tip?

John5: no no, please all

Nikki: as you say. And immediately afterwards I penetrated him deeply.

John5: (I thought I died right there, not only from the pain but my milk run quickly to the tip and then went down again) I felt the strongest orgasm of my life.

Nikki: The swing started slowly, almost slowly because I realized that if I rushed, he was going to be gone in 2 minutes. The shower rain seemed to burn our bodies were burning.

 Nikki: I doubt you'll get to ten minutes, look how you are, can't you give more?

John5: (smiling) I kissed his left cheek and then gave him a little peck on the lips.

Nikki: I love the taste of that oil you put in your mouth.

John5: (laughed) it's garrapiñada!

Nikki: It's very nice.

John5: I was almost in full ecstasy, it helps me that he talks to me about other things to be able to last a little longer. But I was getting close again and I told Nikki to move faster. I screamed loudly as my cum and orgasm finally came out and I felt Nikki fill me with his warm sperm at the same time.

My feelings were on the surface, I kept sobbing and crying.

Nikki: are you okay?

John5: yes. Do not worry, I'm fine. I'm just sensitive. (I smiled)

 Nikki: but something is wrong with you? Can you tell me we are confident. (he said as he gently caressed John face)

 John5: It's hard. I want to be happy. I want to be myself. And I am as you know me. This (showing him the wedding ring) this is not me. This is a lie.

Nikki: and why did you do it then?

John5: because I had no choice, because I didn't have the balls to tell her that I didn't want to.

Nikki: are you sure?

John5: yes.

 nikki pov

 Help John while we were talking to choose his clothes. A transparent black mesh shirt, black leather pants and high black boots with decorated drawings.

And for makeup I suggested that he could paint his eyes with black shadow.

 I changed and dedicated myself to preparing for my date with Tommy.

 Nikki: John can I ask you something?

John5: if you want.

Nikki: can this stay between us?

John5: Of course I do. It won't come out of me. Stay calm.

Neither of us is in the best interest of someone else knowing.

Nikki: That's why. Can I trust you then?

John5: yes yes.

Nikki: if you don't come back too late, I'll wait for you in my room, today I'm sleeping alone.

John5: yes, i will there for you.

[rosesinmars]

FUCKING FUCK! THIS IS REALLY FUCKING HAPPENING! THIS FUCKERS ARE BACK TOGETHER AND BACK ON THE ROAD! MÖTLEY CRÜE ARE BACK AAAAAAA I’M HYSTERICAL!!

and they used Colson’s voice in the promo video: i’m soft, and yes, i’m also crying.

[myriam-hayde]

[old-school-cool]

GUYS

I bought Shout At The Devil today on vinyl

since the inside sleeve is a pentagram I have decided to try to summon Nikki Sixx

I’ll keep you posted xx

[buckysimp101]

Wait a Damn Minute-Part 1

Summary: Nikki’s been sneaking out every night. Finally, he decides to introduce the Crüe to the reason for his late nights.

80s!Nikki Sixx x Reader

warnings: language

“Hey has anybody seen Nikki? He’s been out since last night. Didn’t even join me at the fuckin Rainbow! That’s the 10th time in the last six months!” Tommy yelled to Vince and Mick on his way out of the kitchen, munching on a bag of chips to try and chill out the raging hangover.

“I don’t know where he is, I’m not his keeper,” Mick shouted in return before laying back down on the couch to try and get his nap to last just a little longer, but knowing Tommy Lee that wasn’t going to happen.

“You guys didn’t know? Our little bassist has himself a lady,” Vince stated with a smirk and a wiggle of his eyebrows causing both Mick and Tommy to raise their brows in confusion.

“And how would you know this, blondie? You don’t exactly pay attention to anything or anyone other than yourself,” Mick announced, still trying to sink further into the couch hoping it would swallow him and allow him to just get some fucking sleep.

“Oh it’s easy once you put together all the pieces. So first, he starts sneaking off at night after shows and doesn’t come home til the next day. Not super suspicious because which one of us hasn’t done that. But then, he starts turning down group trips to the Rainbow, we all know how much the Sixxter loves the Rainbow. But he knows that’ll make it too suspicious so he specifically starts quietly turning down our lady friends at the table because he needs us to think he wants to be there when really he wants to be with his friend,” Vince stated with a proud smirk while Tommy just stared, mouth agape, trying to figure out when the hell the singer became a detective.

“Blondie’s not that smart, willing to bet he just heard him talking on the phone calling someone baby and then called Sixx out on it,” Mick told Tommy as he got up from the couch to go grab a drink, his napping attempts futile at this point.

Tommy looked at Vince for confirmation and the blonde just shrugged his shoulders, “Yeah he’s right. But it was fun making you think you’d missed out on these big tells.” Tommy slapped Vince’s head in response.

Meanwhile

“Nikki, baby, you gotta stop. The boys are gonna get concerned if you don’t come back before the show tonight,” you managed to speak in between moans and deep kisses from the bassist. Nikki’s attempt to shut you up including sticking his tongue in your mouth and reaching his hand further up your shirt.

“Shhhhh, sweets. I don’t wanna talk about them. Besides, if they haven’t noticed it yet then they’re never gonna notice,” he whispered, moving his mouth below your ear to bite softly at the sensitive skin there.

“Honey, Vince already knows about me so at least one of them has noticed. And since when has that skinny blonde fucker ever been able to keep his mouth sh-OH, baby yessss,” your statement getting interrupted with a moan as Nikki began to bite and suck at your neck, leaving a nice sized bruise where his mouth was. Nikki pulled back, admiring his work before his eyes met yours, clouded by both lust and love.

Nikki reached a hand up to caress your face and move a piece of hair out of your eyes, his soft touch almost forcing your eyes closed for the thousandth time in the last twelve hours.

“About that…” Nikki started, bringing the conversation back to the boys, “I think it’s time I introduce you to them, officially. I wanna go public, kitten. No more sneakin around, no more pretending the other doesn’t exist. I want you openly, freely, at all hours of the day. What d’ya say, sweets? Think you wanna do this with me?”

Your eyes had begun to well up with tears during Nikki’s little speech. You had talked multiple times the last couple months of your relationship about when you’d finally be introduced to the Crüe as Nikki’s girl and it looks like the time had finally come.

“Of course I’m ready, baby. I wanna do the rest of life with you if I can. You know I’d burn this whole town down just to call you mine,” you said, your voice catching around the emotional lump in your throat. Nikki’s reaction was to burst into the biggest smile you had ever seen on the bassist’s face as he picked you up and swung you around as he babbled on and on about the plans for meeting the boys after their show tonight.

Later

After the show, Nikki met you outside to drive you back to the Crüe’s place to get changed, meet the guys and head to the after party at the Rainbow, your first official outing as a couple. The rest of the guys had already made it back when you and Nikki pulled up.

“Nikki you’re sure they’re gonna be okay with me?” you asked, not making eye contact with the bassist as you played with the skin around your fingernail.

“Hey, kitten. Look at me,” he responded softly, waiting to your eyes to match with his green ones, “it’s all gonna be okay. And if it’s not then fuck them. I love you,” he whispered causing you to take in a stuttering breath.

“Of all the times to say I love you for the first time you choose this one, Sixx?” you questioned in slight shock, his eyes widening as he realized what he has just said and he began sputtering, trying to backtrack on his statement causing you to grin on response. “It’s alright, bassist cause I love you too, you know that right? I just wasn’t expecting the first time we said these words to be outside your house, before I meet your friends.”

He grinned, leaning in to kiss you, “don’t worry baby girl, daddy’ll make it up to you later,” he whispered with a growl causing you to giggle as you rolled your eyes and pushed him off you.

“Alright, rockstar. Let’s get this over with,” you said, stepping out of the car. Nikki met you with an arm wrapped tight around your waist as he opened the door, immediately greeted with the sight of Vince and Mick drinking and doing a couple lines of cocaine.

“HEY! BASSIST, YOU MADE IT. WHO’S THIS HOTTIE!?” Vince bellowed after noticing you and Nikki.

“That’s obviously his girlfriend he wants to introduce to us you dipshit,” Mick said with a slightly annoyed tone as he offered you a small grin.

“Fellas, this is my girlfriend, YN. YN this is Mick Mars and Vince Neil,” Nikki stated, rubbing his hand in small circles on your back.

“A pleasure to meet you, YN. I understand now why Sixx kept you to himself for so long. You sure you don’t wanna ride on the Neil train?” Vince asked with a wiggle of his eyebrows causing everyone to groan. Mick went to say something but was cut off by Tommy walking to the common area.

“YN, that’s a cool name. Funny enough, that’s my sister’s na-,” Tommy announced as he entered the room making you grimace and close your eyes in anticipation of his reaction.

Tommy blinked. Looked between Nikki and YN. Blinked again. Rubbed his eyes. Looked at the bottle of Jack in his hands. Looked at Nikki’s arm wrapped securely around your waist. Blinked again.

“Wait a minute, that better just be a doppelgänger of YN and not my fucking sister, bassist…” Tommy trailed off, your face heating up. You knew this bit of the introductions probably wasn’t going to go well.

“Wait a damn minute…YN…like YN BASS! Tommy’s older sister!?” Vince yelled, not understanding the fuel he just added to the fire. Nikki’s arm slowly unwrapped from around your waist, anticipating his terror twin’s next actions.

“Feranna, you better fucking run, boy!” Tommy yelled as he charged at Nikki, the bassist running out the front door with a head start, leaving you behind shaking your head accompanied by an astonished and high as fuck blonde and an alien who just needed another fucking drink and a good nap.

“Well. That went about as well as expected. Hi Mick, Vince. I’m YN Bass, Tommy’s sister. Where can I get a drink while I wait for these idiots to fight it out?”

~~~~~~~

Part 2

taglist:

@youlightmeupfinn

@la-undercover-latina

@ali-r3n

@hallecarey1

@sekhmetkingscholar

[okmack-22]

celeb crush - eddie munson

 celeb crush - eddie x fem!reader

warnings: foul language

nikki sixx.

you had a huge crush on nikki sixx. and your boyfriend knew. and one of his favorite things was to mess with you about it, whether at home, in public, any time anywhere. this little shit would bring up your adoration for the beloved motley crue bassist.

"baby, eddie, oh my fucking god, motley crue is going on tour" you screamed at him.

beyond excited you ran to him and jumped on his couch. earning a few pinches of springs popping. not that you minded to much. eddie shook his head and chuckled. his eyes rolling to the back of his head.

"yes bugs, i know they are. you only wanna go to check the sixxter out," he joked.

"you know, i actually appreciate their music and like listening to it," you rolled your eyes back at him.

"are you sure?" he asked.

you scoffed, leaning your body into his. his arm going over your shoulder and grabbing at your hand. your fingers intertwining. the warmth of his calloused hands touching your body sent butterflies to your stomach.

"you think nikki would actually find me attractive?" you asked a glimmer of hope in your pretty little fangirl eyes.

the smirk on eddies lips never faltered. his eyes moving down to meet yours. he fully believed that if you were ever near California you'd fully become a groupie and have all the men in bands wrapped around your finger. he believed this because he had seen it before. with him. not entirely true, you had always been his number one girl, but you had the rest of his band wrapped around your finger. so tightly wrapped.

"i think, he'd fall in love" he stated.

you shook your head. the insecurities sitting in. you could never pull a guy like nikki sixx, at least that's what you told yourself. you hated how you looked, especially when thinking about stuff like that. half the time you wonder how you even got to pull a guy like eddie. you really hated how you felt. your demeanor changed slightly, a small defeated sigh coming out from between your lips.

eddie never took his eyes off of you, he saw how your face scrunched up. he knew what was happening. he knew what you were going to say. you said it each time. every time he teased you about it. him telling you that you'd be the hottest groupie out there and nikki sixx would fall to his knees in a heartbeat.

"what? you afraid the great and powerful sixx won't fuck you right on the spot if given the chance?" he asked.

he was teasing you of course, but he just wanted to make you smile. you weren't smiling, nor blushing. nothing actually. your eyes were shut, you didn't believe him. not one bit. you hated the feeling, you should have been confident in yourself, the way he was confident in you.

you shook your head. eddie not having it. he knew in his heart of hearts, you would get a riot out of the guys in motley crue. maybe even mick mars, who was a bit of a grumpy old man. nonetheless, he was a rocker and knew his way around a woman.

eddie sat there still looking at you. thinking long and hard about how to possibly make you feel confident in yourself. the only thing that came to mind would be you caress your body and tell you how amazing and hot you are. but you didn't want that right now and he could tell. the grip on your hand tightened. he leaned down and pecked a kiss on your lips.

you smiled lightly. you were a lucky girl. you wouldn't give eddie up for the world. he was you,r soul mate. not even nikki sixx could take him away from you. he was your rock. anytime you felt like this he knew how you felt and could help you out of it. he hated seeing his girl feel like she wasn't cool and smoking hot.

eddie wasn't gonna have this. he sat up and with that brought you up with him. he went to the cassette player and grabbed the album too fast for love, by motley crue. the song live wire blasting at the highest the player would let it be.

eddie pulled you close. his head bobbing at the fast tempo of the song. his hands at your waist. you two started dancing. as good as possible, he made you sway your hips to the beat. soon after he started your movements started to pick up by themselves. he knew you were getting back into the groove of your usual self.

no insecurities, just the sound of vince neil's voice, tommy lee's drums, mick mars's guitar, and nikki sixx's bass, filling your ears. eddie's hands left your hips. you making your own rhythm, mocking an air guitar along with eddie. hips still moving like crazy. the song soon changed to 'come on and dance' which was the next track from the album. your smile wide, looking at eddie you walked back over to him.

"that's it baby!" eddie shouted over the music as he watched you dance your life away.

you had danced as hard as possible. eddie was watching you intently, slightly hiding a bulge that might have started to grow a few times. he knew that you were confident in your own skin and he loved that, and he was proud of himself for helping you out of the small funk you were in.

song after song you danced your way through the album, hardly any stopping. eddie had stopped a long while ago but you kept on going. he just watched on with loving eyes. as the album was coming to an end he grabbed you a glass of water to make sure you drank something after all that heavy exercise.

you plopped down on the couch beside eddie. leaning your head into his shoulder. he grabbed your hand and kissed your head. beyond exhausted. he knew you were close to passing out. after petting your head as you chugged the water had set down for you, you looked up at him. big puppy eyes boring into his soul. he looked right at you. swearing that every time he looks into your big eyes he falls in love with you all over again.

eddie had a small surprise for you, but he didn't know when to tell you. but thinking about it now was as good a time as ever. he got up after leaving your tight grip. you sat up extremely confused as he ran to his room. you heard a bunch of clunking of stuff he was either throwing or dropping while searching intently.

"eddie baby are you okay?" you asked him.

"I'm alright love, but i need you to close your eyes for me!" he yelled.

you did as said. you sat up and put your hands over your eyes, as if you were a kid counting to 100 to go find your friends that were hiding in a game of hide and seek. you heard a small aha and then the door to eddie's bedroom click back open. small thumps of his socked feet walking back to the living room where you sat.

"okay promise me you won't flip out?" eddie said.

"i won't flip out" you nodded.

eddie walked over and sat something soft on your lap. he then took your hands in his and uncovered your eyes. you looked down and saw two small pieces of paper and a new shirt. those two pieces of paper were tickets to see motley crue on the twenty second of september in indianapolis.  the shirt was a new motley crue shirt. though you had many. you looked up at eddie with the biggest smile on your face.

"the tickets are pit and on nikki's side, i made extra sure you would be able to see the precious sixxter" he smiled at you.

"eddie, i can't believe this" you said, shock in your voice.

pure excitement sat on his face. literally seeping through his body. once it sank in you started crying. almost full on sobs. eddie immediately freaked out and ran to you. moving the tickets and shirt to the side and kneeling on the floor in front of you.

"hey, buggie tell me whats wrong, is it something i did?" he asked.

"no, i can't belive this, eddie you didn't have to" you choked out in sobs.

eddie chuckled. finally realizing that the cries weren't a bad thing. you were happy, and surprised, and purely excited to be able to go see your favorite band with your favorite boy. but the other thing was the fact that eddie didn't have a lot of money, and neither did you. you both came from nothing, so eddie must've spent so much time saving up that money. and it made you feel somewhat guilty. if you knew he wanted to go, you would have helped pitch in and save together.

"baby it's you, you're my girl and i wanted to treat you, you deserve it" he smiled.

"it's too much, how much did my ticket and shirt cost? i wanna pay you back," you insisted.

eddie shook his head immediately. he didn't care how much he spent on his tickets, money is money and he'd get more one way or another. besides you were his girl, the love of his life, no one and nothing would stop him from giving you this. and for fucks sake he wasn't going to let you pay him back for anything.

"absolutely not, y/n you do almost everything for me, this is my gift to you. i love you so so much and i will not accept any money, now, then, and forever. i want to take care of you" he said.

your cries had turned into sniffles. a small smile grazing your face, you knew eddie loved you. and hell you loved him more than anything in the world, he was your everything. and knowing that being the stubborn jackass he was sometimes eddie would stand by his word, he would never let you pay him back. but hell you were gonna try.

"thank you, this means so much to me" you sniffed.

right before eddie was gonna say anything you grabbed his face and shoved his lips to yours. the kiss was full of happiness and passion. both of you smiling into each others lips. nothing would ever stop your love for each other, wether it was nikki sixx or anyone else.

as you two pulled away eddie smiled. one of the biggest smiles he'd ever seen. he finally felt like he did something right in life. actually multiple things, he made you smile and he gets to every day, and he gets to make fun of your love for nikki sixx. and he loved every minute of it. actually he loved every minute of being with you.

"I'm hotter than nikki right?" he asked

"eddie my darling you will always be hotter than nikki" you smiled pressing a small peck to his smirking lips.

"good"

[thesmokingguns]

148 & 153 w/ the Sixxter ♥️🖤

I’ll leave you alone now 💀💀😂😂

I wrote both of these and then they got deleted. You never have to leave me alone. Sorry it took so long.

148. “I’m so proud of you.”

The soft buzz of Nikki's phone made you look up from the book. He picked it up, smirking at whatever was on the screen before going back to looking at the movie he was watch.

"Who was that?" you asked, the way that he had smirked had you curious. "Was that your girlfriend? Hot date?" you teased him moving from your chair to where he was. Nikki pulled you down on his lap.

"I couldn't have a girlfriend with the amount of attention you need." he teased you right back. He knew you weren't going to let it go so he held up his phone, "20 years." He said it with a shrug like it didn't matter.

All of his big accomplishments seemed to be wrapped up in the band that he couldn't see what a big deal his solo accomplishments were and how important it was to recognize what a huge deal it was.

"Nikki, I'm so proud of you." you had your hands on his cheeks looking into the olive eyes of the man. Nikki didn't know what to do, "I hope you take time to allow yourself to be proud of yourself today." you gave him a soft kiss watching how he looked away for a second after, emotions running across his face.

"Thank you, Y/N. Thank you." he finally said, cuddling you close. The feeling of pride filling him and a relief that someone finally understood him.

153. “I want you to go upstairs and lock the door, okay? Don’t come out until I tell you to.”

Your mother looked at you, eyes wild as she pushed you towards the stairs. Her head turning to the dining room where your father was having a tantrum

"I want you to go upstairs and lock the door, okay? Don't come out until I tell you to." her hand rubbed your hair before pushing you forward. You gave her a look, "Go, Y/N" she warned.

Running up the stairs, you felt hot tears running down your face as you went to your bedroom. Locking the door behind you. The sound of shouting filled the house as you covered your ears, tears running down your face.

A knock made you look up, wondering if it really could be over so early. Instead there was the black haired boy you had went on a few dates with, outside your window.

Quickly you let him in, watching him climb nimbly through the opening and smiling at you.

"Hey babe, you didn't answer any of my calls-" he stood hearing something shatter. Looking at the door. Shame and embarrassment coloring your cheeks. "You want to get out of here? We can get some dinner and just drive around for a while. If you're feeling extra wild pack a bag and I'll take you away all weekend." you smiled at his offer but he was serious.

Nikki had grown up with family fighting around him. And even though you were eighteen he knew what it was like feeling stuck in it. If he could get you out, he would.

"I can't leave my mom." you admitted. He nodded, understanding this. He was peeling off his leather jacket, tossing it on your desk and moving to toe off his shoes next, "What are you doing?" you asked. Though the door was locked you still were nervous about getting caught with him in your room.

"Well if you can't get out I'll stay in with you. Want me to put on a record and we can make out?" he joked grabbing your hips and pulling you close to him.

"why are you being so nice to me?" you hadn't slept with him or did more than kiss him on the four dates you had been on. Though Nikki had tried to bring you back to his place the last time. He called everyday, staying on the phone with you until you fell asleep. And even left flowers on your doorstep one morning. But he was also 22 and you were 18 finishing your last month of high school. It felt like you were ages apart.

"You're my girl, Y/N. You know that." the way you looked up at him made him realize that you didn't know that. "C'mon, do you really think that I wasn't serious about you?" you raised an eyebrow. "You're going to make me ask, aren't you?" The sound of fighting was fading as you once more nodded. Nikki sighed out, running his fingers through his hair. He seemed almost embarrassed now. "Okay, Y/N, will you be my girlfriend?" he asked. You pretended to think about it. Watching him shift from one foot to another.

"Of course Nikki. I thought you already knew you were my guy." he took your mind off the problems and gave you hope that love was real.

[xxisxxisxxis]

Gateway Drug | Part Ninety-Three [PT.2]

Words: 4.2k

Warning(s): explicit language, violence, mentions of drug abuse

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LET ME KNOW IF YOU WANT TO BE TAGGED

It's incredibly quiet and filled with tension as Amber looks at Nikki and I, curiously. 

We haven't been to therapy in over a week. 

Nikki hasn't come back to fucking rehab until yesterday and it took me threatening divorce again. 

"Well," Amber starts, smiling at us. "How was your time together?" 

"Good." We both lie simultaneously and Amber raises her brows. 

"Really?" 

"Yep." Nikki says, flatly. 

"Like we're dating for the first time all over again." I add, unenthusiastically. "Exactly how it was when we first started dating. Just minus the sex." 

Nikki huffs out a breath. 

"Jesus fucking Christ, Vivian--"

"--Don't bring Jesus into this. Jesus isn't anywhere to be found in this situation."

"It was one night, Viv, cut me a goddamn break." 

"I've been cutting you a break for the last six years, Nikki, I'm done cutting people breaks. You need to cut me some respect--"

"--Some respect? After the shit you pulled, are you fucking me right now?" 

"No, I'm not fucking you right now, no more than you've fucked me the entire time you've been home." 

"Oh, my God."

I slowly start being pulled from my sleep when I feel a tickle up the side of my foot, my ankle, up the back of my calf then my thigh, my hip, up my spine...I feel my body jolt awake only to be trapped under someone for a moment. 

"Shh, shh, it's just me." Nikki assures me in a whisper, looming over me. 

"Oh," I mumble, sighing when he kisses my shoulder blade. 

I try to go back to sleep but my eyes force themselves open, and I look over my shoulder. 

"Why the hell aren't you in rehab, Nikki?!" I ask him, sharply, confused. "How the fuck did you even get in here?! How did you even know where I live?!" 

"I checked out for a few days so I could see you." He explains. "And Sharise let me borrow her key and gave me directions. I wanted to surprise you."

"You what?!" 

"Wanted to surprise you?" 

I sit up and he falls beside me, stretching out over the bed. 

"You checked out of rehab?!" 

"I missed you and Tommy and Vince missed their girls so we just decided to check out for a few days and visit and then we're going back Monday...like a four month long weekend." He explains. 

"You can't do that!" 

"It was highly advised against it by our counselors but let us leave." He shrugs. "And you know what? I've been back in L.A. for an hour and I don't feel the itch to go party like I used to. I think rehab's working." He tells me. 

"...You checked out of rehab…to come home...and you're going back?" 

"Yep."

"Just like that?" 

"Just like that." 

"Like you won't be tempted to do anything you're not supposed to do?" 

"I won't be because I'm gonna be with you the whole time." He shrugs. 

"You do realize how arrogant you sound right now, right?" 

"I'm not interested in drugs or anything anymore, Viv. I've gotten past that." He states. 

"Nikki," I start. 

"Don't say it like that." 

"How else am I suppose to say it?" I ask, raising my brows, looking at him, pointedly. 

He just rubs his lips together and smirks. 

"I know a few ways you can say it." He runs his hand up and down the side of my leg and I raise a brow. 

"You left rehab to get your dick wet." I tell him, knocking his hand off of me, laying back down. 

"No, I didn't." He denies. 

"Okay, then go sleep on the couch." I suggest. 

"No." He argues. "I wanna hold you." 

"Oh, please, Nikki, we both know what that turns into." 

"What does it turn into?" He asks, knowingly. 

"You know what it's gonna turn into." I state. 

"Vivian, baby," he slides his hand over my hip bone, squeezing it for a second, making my skin prickle and heat up. 

"Don't, 'baby,' me." I can't bring myself to push his hand away this time, I just turn my back to him. 

It's quiet for a moment and I feel him shift beside me, before his lips press to my bare shoulder, then my jaw, then my temple, and I'm rolling to my back, my lips brushing against his, my fingers going to his soft hair, a smile coming to my lips as I say, "couch," and push him away from me, turning back over to face away from him and snuggling into my covers. 

He mumbles under his breath and grabs the pillow from that side of the bed, leaving me alone. 

After a moment of trying to go to sleep, I can't bring myself to. 

I feel like a kid on Christmas morning. 

I pull my blankets off and drag a throw with me as I go to the living room. 

He's taking up the entire couch, and his eyes are closed but I know he's not asleep. 

I crawl on him and he groans, looking at me with furrowed brows.

"Your knee is in my thigh." He grumbles as I try to pull my blanket around myself. 

I just blink down at him. 

"Fine." He winces, sitting up as best as he can, helping me pull the blanket up around my shoulders before he's sliding his hands to my waist and we both lay down. 

I lay my head on his chest and he rubs at my scalp with his fingers. 

"I've missed you, too." I say to him quietly. 

"I know." He replies. "The Sixxter tends to have that effect on chick--ow!" He hisses, tensing up. 

"Oh, sorry, didn't realize your junk was there." I lie, playing off me digging my nails into his crotch was an accident. 

I knew him leaving rehab, even for a few days, posed a threat to his road to recovery. My biggest fear was his dealers hearing he was back. They'd sniff him out and lure him in and I'd lose him again. I couldn't let that happen, and it terrified me to think that it could. But it also made me feel better to see him in a setting that didn't involve stail coffee, therapists, and other recovery patients near by. There wasn't any privacy in rehab--not that we really needed any.

The next morning I'm waking up to the smell of food, good food. Being that I burn most anything I try to cook now (I blame my pregnancy brain), it's nice to be able to smell breakfast without the heavy blanket of charr attached to it. 

I stretch where I've been left on the couch under the fluffy blanket I brought in last night, sitting up and pulling it off of me before going to the bathroom and making myself look somewhat presentable with a toothbrush and a hair brush, hoping and praying that whatever he's cooking up doesn't make me sick. 

I get in the kitchen and see him in front of the stove, and I wrap my arms around him, pressing my cheek to his shoulder blade, and I feel him rub at my arms that are tightly around him, chuckling. 

"Good morning," he says, looking at me over his shoulder. 

I stand on my toes and kiss his cheek. 

"Good morning." I reply, pulling away, grabbing a glass and getting some water. 

I take advantage of him not paying attention to examine any changes. 

I noticed the other day he'd been working out. I see now exactly how much alcohol bloat he's lost, and how much muscle he's built back up. 

His hair and skin even looks healthier, he's gotten his "glow" back to his once pale, sallow looking appearance. 

I reign in my hormones, chugging my water and getting another glass full. 

When he turns around to get the sausage out of the pan and onto a plate, I eye his crotch area, seeing that he's obviously not wearing underwear under his shorts and I'd be lying if I said I don't stare.

"I hope you still like sausage." He comments, oblivious to my eyes on his goods, not even looking in my direction, too busy with trying to get breakfast done. 

"Oh, I do." I comment, taking another few gulps of water, letting my eyes trail down his thighs for a moment. 

Sweet Jesus. 

He is certainly fearfully and wonderfully made. 

"Ahem," he clears his throat and I flick my gaze to his face. 

I've been caught. 

"Whatcha looking at?" He asks me and I shake my head a little. 

"I like those shorts." I lie, shrugging it off. 

"Mmhmm." He doesn't buy it for a second. 

"I do!" I defend myself. 

"I'm sure it's the shorts you like." He comments. 

"Well...I like what's inside the shorts." I blatantly correct myself and he squeezes his eyes closed and laughs. 

"Welcome home, Nikki." He says to himself and I finish my water as he turns the stove off. "It's ready if you wanna make a plate." He offers. 

"Maybe we should give it a few minutes to cool off." I suggest, slowly getting closer to him. 

"Um, I think it's okay." He brushes it off, shrugging, not paying attention. 

"I think we should let it cool off." I state again, my fingers teasing at the top of his shorts, and he looks at me. 

"Get away from me, you freak." He laughs out, shooing my hands off of him.

"Oh, I'm the freak?" 

"You were trying to blow me before therapy the other day and now you're trying to get it in while I'm trying to eat." He points out, still laughing. "I know I'm a lot to handle but just chill out." He smiles, raising his brows. 

"I don't know if you're being serious right now or not." 

"I'm being serious." He points at me. "Now get a plate and let's eat." He adds. 

"You don't want to mess around?" 

"I didn't say that." He states.

"Okay, then food can wait, c'mon," I grab his hand and try to tug him out of the kitchen.  

"Viv," he says as I plant my feet on the floor and use both hands to try to tug at him, my socks sliding against the tile but I try my hardest to get him to move. 

He waits patiently before I'm falling on my ass after slipping, still holding his hand, letting out a breath. 

I let his hand go and lay on the floor, groaning. 

"Are you done?" He asks me, raising a brow. 

"I'm horny." I say it flatly, staring at the ceiling. 

"I can see that." He says, looking between my legs where I feel a wet spot in my panties. 

Great. 

"Nikki, you're being difficult." 

"How?" 

"I wanna fool around, you wanna fool around, we should just fool around. But you don't want to, even though you just said you do." 

"Viv--"

"I haven't gotten thrown around and fucked into a coma in over six months." I blurt, crossing my arms, looking up at him from my place on the floor. 

"...He couldn't scratch that itch after all, huh?" He asks, amused, smirking, and I cut my eyes at him. 

"Because he has morals." I reply. 

"Interesting." He replies. 

We sit in silence for a second, and he nudges me with his foot. 

"Are you gonna survive without jumping my bones?" He asks and I sigh, sitting up. 

"I guess." 

He helps me up and we get our food and sit on the couch while we watch cartoons and eat. 

I notice him staring at me every once in awhile, but I don't pay any attention to him. 

My feelings are hurt, as childish as that sounds. 

It usually doesn't take much to get Nikki into bed, and he's always been up for it whenever I hinted at anything...or blatantly told him I was horny. 

But now things are different. 

A part of me thinks its because he sat down and really thought about the fact I cheated on him.

Maybe that makes me disgusting in his eyes. 

Maybe it's because I'm pregnant--even though I'm only starting to show. 

Maybe it's because I'm pregnant with the dude's baby that I cheated on him with. 

I can see that ruining his libido. 

I just try not to pay much attention to it, but it's nagging me slowly. 

After I finish eating I'm taking my empty plate to the kitchen and heading to my bedroom. 

"Where you going?" He asks me as he puts his plate in the sink, too. 

"Back to bed." I tell him. "I'm really sleepy." 

"Oh," He replies, not looking all that convinced.

"See you when I wake up." I add.

"Yeah, I'll see you then." He says back. 

I shut the door and crawl into bed, wiping the growing tears from my eyes before they even hit my cheeks. 

I wake up a little later and stretch out, hearing the shower running in my bathroom. 

I just lay in bed for a few minutes until I hear it turn off and in a couple minutes, he's coming in the room with a towel wrapped around him, his hair wet.  

He notices I'm awake and grins, coming over to the bed. 

"Hey," he leans over me, pecking me on the lips. 

"Hey." I reply, my voice still tired, his hand running over my side. "What time is it?" 

"Like, one o'clock, maybe," he replies, about to move away from me. 

"Wait, c'mere," I grab his hand and he furrows his brows. 

"What is it?" He asks me.

I don't say anything, just looking at him, and he chuckles. 

He reads my mind and leans down, lips catching mine before his tongue slips into my mouth. 

I softly hum, my hand going to his hair, his hand fumbling through the covers to find my hip and dig his fingers into it. 

My hands soon go to his towel, about to tug it off but he pulls away and catches his breath. 

"I'm gonna go get some clothes on and head to the store to get some things for dinner tonight...you want anything?"  

Yeah. Sex with my husband. 

"No, thanks." I reply, calmly. 

"Alright, I'll see you later." He kisses me one last time and leaves the room and I rub my hands over my face.

"There's nothing to get so pissed off about, Vivian, it's not a big deal." 

"For once in his life Nikki Sixx doesn't want to hump something, even when his own wife tries to start something, so yeah, to me it is a big deal." I argue. 

"No, it's not, it's not that serious." 

"Do you not understand what it's like to be pregnant and hormonal and just wanting to have a good time with the person you love and they don't want anything to do with it?"

"Oh, c'mon, Vivian. Me not wanting to have sex with you doesn't have anything to do with you in particular." 

"Pretty sure it does since you've had no problem screwing other women behind my back when I couldn't do a good enough job." I throw at him. 

"Woah, woah, woah, that was fucking months ago, Vivian, and I was fucked up and sick." He snaps. "And it wasn't because you couldn't do a good enough job, it was because you wouldn't even try to do a job at all. You'd just lay there and be uninterested, like you were just waiting for me to get the fuck off of you. Matter of fact, I distinctly remember you actually saying, 'are you finished yet? I'm getting sleepy.' And I get that you were depressed and in a funk but shit like that happened multiple times, sometimes for weeks, over the course of our marriage. You know how that made me feel, thinking I couldn't even please my own wife?" 

"Oh, God, Nikki, I can't even imagine that pain. Thinking, 'why am I not good enough? Why am I not attractive to my spouse? Why am I not still desired'," I start, sarcastically. "Oh, shit, actually, yeah. Yeah, I fucking can imagine it because I tortured myself with the same questions anytime you chose going out with your buddies over a night in with me, anytime you chose hiding in your closet with drugs over coming to bed, and not to mention the time, gee, I don't know--I found out you had a mistress, who I was friends with, that you would fuck in our house!" 

"Think you got pretty even with me on that being that I found a couple used condoms  that didn't belong to me, under our bed!"

"That can't possibly be my fault being that me and him never used condoms!" 

"You don't fucking say!" He motions to my stomach.

"Fuck this." I state, harshly, standing up and grabbing my purse. 

"Vivian," Amber starts. 

"No. No. No. Fuck you, fuck him, fuck this. I'm fucking done. We tried rehab, we tried therapy, obviously it's not working or he wouldn't have come home and fallen off the wagon!" 

"Ever considered maybe I fell off the wagon so early on because you kept nagging me for days on end?!" He stands up. 

"You didn't want anything to do with me fucking sober, but as soon as you were under the influence of something, I'm suddenly so fucking beautiful and you're wanting to 'fuck the shit outta me'?! Do you not realize how fucked it is that you only want me when you're fucking on something?!"

The next few days consists of me being unable to keep my...urges...barely at bay, all while Nikki has no problem ignoring my hints--more so blunt statements at times--that I'm in the mood. 

He just laughs it off or teases me about it or pretends he doesn't know altogether. 

I just do what I've been doing: being my own lover. 

But there's just some things he can do to me that I can't and it's hard to accept that reality. 

I raise my brows when I peek my head into my bathroom, seeing Nikki fixing his hair, only wearing boxers. 

"Where you getting dolled up to go?" I ask, crossing my arms. 

"Me and Tommy are going out." He tells me and I raise my brows. 

"Oh." I reply, rubbing my lips together. 

I don't know how to tell him I'm having my surgery tomorrow to have my uterine abnormality taken care of...I've been meaning to tell him but just can't. 

I was hoping he'd still be in rehab and wouldn't even really have to know I got it done until later. 

I don't want him to worry. 

"You wanna come with us?" He asks next, grinning at me in the mirror. 

I don't know if that's a good idea." I mumble, that article written about that open letter from those anonymous roadies flashing through my mind. 

"C'mon, baby, it'll be fun."

"I don't feel good enough to go out on the town right now." I admit. "What are you guys gonna do while you're out?" 

"Probably go to the Tropicana or something." He shrugs and I raise my brows. 

"...Oh." 

"Like I said, Viv, you can come with us." He turns and looks down at me and I just smile as best as I can and shake my head. 

"No, I'm okay." I assure him. 

He looks a little disappointed but brushes it off, leaning down and kissing me, wrapping his arms around my waist, his hands smoothing over my ass, and I giggle as he pulls me up to snake my legs around him, kissing my cheek and my neck before hugging me to him, making me squeeze him to me tightly. 

"I love you, Nikki." I tell him, closing my eyes. "I really do."

"I know, Viv." He says back. "I love you more."

"And like always, it's Vivian's fault Nikki's a fucking addict! It's Vivian's fault Nikki's drinking so much! It's Vivian's fault Nikki's so unbearable to be around! It's all that slut's fault because she's a fucking crazy snake-cunt, she-satan that steals, kills, and destroys, and he's left with no choice but to try to numb himself to get outta her grasp!  It's all her fucking fault, even when she's pregnant!" 

I storm out and slam the door behind me, stomping down the hall. 

"Vivian Sixx, don't you fucking walk away from me!" He shouts after me, following me. 

"Vivian Kinston! I don't wanna be a fucking Sixx anymore--I don't wanna be associated with you, you fucked up prick!" I scream back. "Matter of fact, I'm glad I didn't have any of those goddamn kids of your's or else I'd be fucking answering to you the rest of my fucking life!" 

I wake up when I hear the front door open, my eyes shifting to my clock. 

2:00a.m. 

"Fuck," I hear him whisper to himself, dragging his feet to the kitchen…

The sink turns on, a cabinet slams open, a glass shatters on the floor. 

"Fuck." He repeats, cutting the sink off. 

I furrow my brows and sit up in the bed, slowly slipping off the mattress, tip-toeing out to see what he's up to.

"Nikki?" 

"Do you--do you have a broom?" He asks in a slur, motioning to the broken glass on the floor. 

"Yeah, I do." I tell him. 

"Okay, I um, I…" he trails off, eyes on me, drifting down my bare legs, holding his gaze on my lace panties. "...I need it." He finishes, hand reaching down to readjust himself. 

"Have you been drinking?" I ask him, leaning against the doorway.

"A couple shots, nothing I couldn't handle." He replies, walking closer to me. "Something else I can handle, too." He says more so to himself and I take in a breath when his hands grasp at my hips. 

"You smell like tequila." I tell him. 

"It was just a couple drinks." He insists, leaning down, pressing his lips to mine. 

"Just a couple?" I ask when I pull away, and he nods, pulling me back to him, kissing me again, our tongues meeting. 

His hands are tugging at my tank top, pulling it over my head. 

"You're so beautiful." He tells me, licking up my neck and I let out a soft sigh, running my hands down his back, tears in my eyes…

I close my eyes and my mind flashes back. All those times he'd come in drunk or high or both...either telling me how wonderful I am, or wanting to fight…

"Nikki, wait," I force myself to pull away from him as he trails kisses over my breast. 

"What is it?" He asks me, trying to get me close again. 

"You're drunk, Nikki, alright? I don't want to do anything while you're like this." I admit and he just stares at me. 

"Excuse me?" 

"You're drunk. I don't want you to--"

"--You bitch at me all fucking week about your fucking sexual frustration but as soon as I wanna piece of ass you're suddenly too good for me?" 

"Nikki, you're drunk." I state. "I'm not too good for you, but I'm not just gonna be the cumrag you get off on and pass out in a drunken stupor." 

"You never complained about it before." He states. "All the other times you were on your knees with your mouth wide open begging me for it like a cock-starved whore." He adds. 

"That was before. You aren't even supposed to be drunk, Nikki." I sneer. 

"Well, I am,Vivian, you wanna fucking crucify me over it? Huh?!" 

"All of your hard work the past weeks...gone." I remind him. 

"Fuck off." He shoves past me. "If you're not gonna give me any pussy--"

"--Maybe I would if you were sober, asshole, ever consider that?" I snap. 

"I wanna fuck the shit out of you, I've considered that." He states and I feel my face heat up. 

"You're being a pig, right now." I ignore him, turning to go back to bed, pissed and tired. 

"C'mon, baby," he complains from outside my locked door and I roll my eyes. "Baby, seriously, can't we talk about this?" He asks next. "Baby!" He calls. 

I open the door and bitterly mock his voice, "'oh, baby, I'm so sorry, oh, baby, you're so beautiful, oh, baby, just gimme a blow job and it'll completely wipe away the fact that I'm a fucking drunk, ridiculous, asshole, oh, baby, baby, baby, baby'!" I slam the door back in his face. 

"...Well, I never said I was fucking sorry!" He says next. 

"Fuck off, Nikki!"

He snatches me by my wrist, and I see him raise his fist from the corner of my eye as I turn to face him, and I tense up and expect him to hit me but his fist collides with the wall by my head, my hand coming up to my mouth to keep from being too loud in my hysteria, tears rolling down my cheeks as he gives three solid punches to the painted cement bricks. 

He's crying, too, and his hand loosening around my wrist, his face red, his body shaking as he lets out a pained noise and heaves out breaths, his eyes closed.

[cursedmotleycrueimages]

Do you believe this??? Nikki think he's ugly, i mean he said that so many times wtf sixxter

He used to be very insecure about his body and especially his legs and thighs, and I would've been glad to remind him how fucking perfect he actually is everytime I had the chance

[cruecifymesixx]

Love and Leather /part seventy three/

Word Count: 4.1k

A/N: Enjoy!

Warnings: language

Taglist: @brideofdraculana , @renfriii , @aryssav , @miserablecunt , @dangerous-like-a-loaded-pistol @anntheboneless, @venus-calum, @justjodeye, @supernaturalvikingwhore,  @hi-my-name-is-riley, @extremesadnerding, @thatbandchick39, @awkwrdcait, @countrygirlswonderland, @awesomealmostdopestudent @romanticvengeance , @tashy-bear, @krazykatkay456, @terror-triplet, @shouttatthedevill @beachystars, @rodriguez025, @kickstart-myheart-sixx, @s-outhie, @anxious-diabetic, @awkwardblackgirls, @rockersbox, @brooklyn-antiques, @shamelessobsessions, @jerseytaint, @lilytalebi, @criminalyetminimal, @motley-queen, @trapt-in-a-dream, @lunamadhatter99, @broke-n-bitchy, @thanks2pete, @slowandangry, @lovesick-heart0, @keepcalm-and-beyou, @miriampraez, @teenwolflover28, @lilyhw1, @motherloovebone, @random-internet-user-4471, @falcon-arrows, @talranocchia2001, @wheresmyvodkabitch, @waywardprincess666, @malibubarbievince, @iluvmesomemarvelndc, @zoenicoles @vamprlestat, @supersoldierballerina, @primal-screamer@electradestiny, @marshbev, @n0-sh0rtage-0f-faults, @cruebaby, @ggorehorror, @valentines-in-london, @miss2001babe, @nassauartist @cmft-jr-winchester, @bokkie92, @notworthyofyou1120 @xrosegoldwolfx,  @lauravic, @mgkobsessed, @chaoticvybe,  @kellysimagines @thoughtsoftheantagonist @marvelismylifffe,  @sleepyjunhong  @meetthesixxter @sparxx27 @gingerspicetalks @kaitieskidmore1 @unknownoblivion @nevergoodenuffbutokaaayyy @sublimeprincesswasteland @kylieinwonderland @haileynicoleseavey17 @lavendersoundbarrier @ijustwanttokiss70srogertaylor, @xxisxxisxxis, @malibubarbievince, @dogmom2014, @cruesixxlover1991, @xpoisonousrosesx, @cranberrirolls, @m0rnlngstar, @love-struck-aries, @findingmyths, @minxtruck, @i-want-to-shoot-myself, @arianareirg, @fentitrbl​, @sinningsixx​, @motleycrueprincess​, @redlipscrystalskies14​, 

*Nikki’s POV*

“Van, I can take her up to her room. Just let me, please?” I watched as she picked up Arianna and carried her inside.

“Just get the bags.” Vanity mumbled to me as I sighed. I realized halfway through the drive home I was being an asshole to everyone just because I wanted to hurry up and get here. I carried the bags in and put them down by the stairs.

“Well hello pretty girl. Did you miss me?” Anarchy came up wagging her tail before running up the stairs, completely ignoring me along the way. I went to the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of water before sitting down at the table.

“Thought I heard the gate open. You guys are back a day early.” I turned my head to the side when Clementine came out of her art studio with paint soaked brushes.

“Yeah, Allen called me about a new singer this morning-“ “...And now you guys are so excited. Tommy told me.” She interrupted me as she started rinsing off her brushes in the sink.

“Do you have to clean them there? I don’t want paint staining the tile. Can’t you clean them in a cup?” I questioned her as she shook her head.

“Vanity said I could.”

I rolled my eyes and got up from the chair, “Just clean up your mess. I don’t want to see it.” I walked over to the answering machine and went through them.

‘Nikki, it’s Allen. I tried calling your cell but It probably went through when you didn’t have any signal driving back. Anyways, come to my office around noon tomorrow. We also need to discuss your new contract with Elektra and how much you guys will be bringing home. Talk to you tomorrow.’

Message deleted.

‘Sixxter! Dude! Did you hear?! A new fuckin singer?! Hit me up when you’re back in town and let’s go grab some drinks! Maybe go to the titty bar!’

I chuckled and deleted the message. I’ll have to call Tommy in a little bit.

‘I hope this is still the right number. Don’t have any new ones for Sixx’s house. Anyways. Uh, hey Vanity it’s Saul, well Slash-‘

Fuck no. No. I’m not fucking doing this

“...I heard you were back in town. You’re still very popular here. New York huh? You shoulda reached out some how. I was staying there for a bit too. Anyways, uh here’s my number. You can keep it if you want. I was thinking if you were up for it we could catch up. Maybe grab a bite to eat or something to drink or whatever you want. Your choice. Just um give me a call. I’ll talk to you later maybe? Bye Vanity.”

Message deleted.

“Did you really just delete a message that was meant for me?” I quickly turned around when Vanity was standing by the stairs, arms folded across her chest.

“Vanity, I didn’t-“

She raised an eyebrow at me before walking to the kitchen, “Hi clemmy. Missed you.” I watched as she gave her a hug, “Was everything okay while we were gone?”

She nodded, “Of course! I signed for a few packages that came for Nikki. Anarchy was good she probably lost a few pounds since Ari wasn’t here to feed her. Told you I could be trusted watching the house.” Clementine glanced over at me. My jaw clenched as I turned away from them and grabbed the bags to bring up stairs.

“Don’t worry about him. He’s being an asshole today.” Vanity whispered, but not quiet enough. I shook my head and peered over the banister and into the kitchen.

“If you’re gonna call me an asshole. Say it to my god damn face and not when I leave the room.” I hastily snapped at her as she glared up at me.

“You’re being an asshole, Nikki.”

I shook my head before pushing her suitcase down the stairs to where it was prior, “Vanity don’t.” Clementine spoke as she tried reaching for her.

“No! Fucking let her!” I watched as Vanity came up on me, seeing the fire in her eyes burning hotter the longer she stared at me.

“Guys, Arianna is in the house so let’s not do this.” Clementine suggested as I sent her the middle finger.

“Shut the hell up, Clementine. She wants to start we can-“ I stopped talking when Van grabbed me by my arm, her nails digging into my skin as she attempted to suppress the rage. She dragged me into my room with all her force and slammed the door shut.

She pinched the bridge of her nose before looking at me, “I really, really don’t want to fight with you right now but you are being an asshole and I am not going to deal with it.”

“Me?!” She nodded, “How the hell am I being an asshole!? If it’s because of how we left this morning then doll, I am sorry. But it’s the band! You of all people should know how this! It’s my band, Vanity! I know you and Ari were having fun, I was too. But it’s my job babe. You’ve got to understand that.” I tried to explain and attempt to stay calm.

She leaned against the bedroom door, “So your manager or the label call you and you come running like a little lap dog?! You left your grandfather without even saying you loved him! Or with a proper goodbye! Arianna was so confused this morning Nikki! All because of how you were acting! All because you just had to get back here! by the way, you almost fucking killed us like four times! But you wouldn’t realize that because you couldn’t shut the fuck up about the stupid band and the stupid new singer who you don’t even know will be your singer yet!!” Vanity unloaded on me as I slumped down into a sitting position on the bed.

“Baby, I didn’t-“ I stopped talking when she exhaled deeply and took a step to me.

“I know you didn’t mean to do all that because you are happy some good news is finally coming since Vince left. But fuck Nikki, it was a little bit to much for me. I was so excited to be spending time with you and Arianna and having Tom with us and you ripped that from me and from her and from Tom! And then we come home and you delete a message that was meant for me and-“

I stood up, “I deleted it for a good fucking reason and you know that.” I pointed in her face as I stared down at her, “So don’t start the Slash bullshit with me.”

“Bullshit?! It’s been fucking years Nikki! Get over it! You aren’t my fucking boyfriend and if I want to call up Slash and take him up on his offer of catching up then I will!”

“Get out of my bedroom.” I looked away from her, grabbing my suitcase and going through my clothes and throwing them all in the hamper so I didn’t have to hang any of them back up.

“I’m not doing that though. So don’t worry about it.” Vanity assured as I rolled my eyes and laughed.

“Why not? I’m not your boyfriend.” I glanced at her as her lips parted to say something, “So go do whatever the hell you want, because I know you’re just going to do it anyways.”

“I am not-“ “Just get out of my room, alright?”

“Nikki-“ “Get out! Go!”

She stared at me for a moment, gnawing on her bottom lip before, shaking her head and turning away from me. The door latched quietly, hearing her footsteps disappear down the stairs.

I threw the suitcase across the room and at my closet door before getting on my bed and burying my face in the pillows.

*Next Morning*

~Nikki’s POV~

I pushed open Vans door, seeing her bed made perfectly, but clothes were tossed around her room and her perfume lingered faintly. I looked down at Arianna as she smiled at me, “Now where did your mom go?” I patted the top of her head when she shrugged.

“Auntie is home.” She told me, latching onto my hand and swinging it around, “Can we watch cartoons?”

I nodded, “Yeah, yeah. Let’s go downstairs. Have you had breakfast yet?”

I watched as she sat down on the stairs and slid all the way down them giggling, “Mommy made me french toast before she left.”

I flipped on the TV for her as she grabbed one of her barbies and climbed on the couch, “Did she go to the store?”

Arianna looked at me, “I dunno.”

I just wanted to say sorry to her.

I rubbed the sleeps out of my eyes and walked to the kitchen to get some coffee. “Is auntie painting?” I asked Arianna, her only response being a head nod as she was engrossed in the child’s show.

I walked down the hallway, going to the back of the house and looking inside to see Clementine sitting on a stool, painting away at a canvas.

“Can I help you?” Her voice was already littered with annoyance, “Is Arianna bored? She can come in here and play if she wants. I don’t mind.”

I chuckled and stayed out at the door, “No, no she’s not bored. Woke me up rudely, but that’s fine. She was asking where Van went...”

I watched her dip the brush into a mason jar full of dirty water before putting it back on the canvas, “Was she? Or are you asking where she is?”

I glared at the back of her head, “She’ll be home later. She left about an hour ago.” Clementine spoke as she finally turned around to look at me, “She’s a big girl Nikki. She can be by herself without you breathing down her neck.”

I furrowed my eyebrows. What the hell was that suppose to mean?

“Well where’d she go? Did she say when she would be back? I wanted to apologize for yesterday...” I mumbled, crossing my arms against my chest and leaned against the doorway.

“Yeah, was a nice little screaming match last night.” Clementine rolled her eyes at me before she started working again, “She said she was going to the diner to see if she can get her old job back and then mentioned going to lunch with a friend. Didn’t say when she’d be back.”

“Okay...well, I have to leave at noon to have a meeting with Allen. Can you watch Arianna? Or do you want me to take her with me?”

All Clementine did was shrug, “Whatever you want Nikki.”

I scowled at the back of her head, “Alright...I’ll just take her if it’s an issue.”

“No one said it was an issue.”

The woman in this house are going to cause me to rip out my hair.

“Which friend is she hanging out with? She didn’t really have a whole lot to begin with here. Other than Lucia and Tonya and the band.”

I heard her mumble something under her breath but I couldn’t make it out, “I don’t know? She called Tommy for his number and then she was out the door an hour later? I’m not her keeper, Nikki.”

His?

“I’m sure she’s fine Nikki, alright? Just go to your meeting.”

I walked away from her room, going down the hallway and shaking my head. Let me find out Tommy gave Vanity Slash’s number. I grabbed my phone off the counter and dialed Vans number and waiting patiently for her to answer, watching Arianna sing along to the cartoon.

‘Hey it’s Vanity! Leave me a message and-‘

I hung up the phone immediately and called Tommy.

‘I’ll be at the office soonish and-“

“Do you know where Vanity is?” I questioned him as the line went silent, “Tommy? Did you hear me?”

“I heard you.”

I rolled my eyes, “Okay well can you answer my question? Clementine said Van called you before she left.”

Tommy groaned, “Shit.” He chuckled, an uncomfortable chuckle, “She uh..she called asking for Slash’s number...”

“And you gave it to her because?!?!” I shouted, gripping the counter and forcing a half smile when Arianna peeked over the couch.

“Well I dunno, man! She just called and demanded it. Hey! Look, I’m in your corner Sixx. I tried telling her that wouldn’t be the best idea but you know how she is. She told me to fuck off and it wasn’t any of my business but yeah, I’m sorry?”

I shook my head, “It’s...it’s fine Tommy. I’ll see you in a little bit.”

“Later Sixxter.”

I put the phone down and rubbed my face, “Arianna! We gotta go get dressed. You have to come to work with me.”

“Can I wear my princess dress?”

“Yes my lady-“ bowing to her as she giggled, “You may wear the most prettiest princess dress imaginable.”

*Later that Evening*

~Vanity’s POV~

After parking my car in the garage, I quickly and quietly snuck through the door and started heading to the kitchen to put the cupcakes I got Arianna earlier today in the fridge. I heard the jangle of Anarchy’s collar behind me, followed by her bark.

“Sh! You’re gonna get me in trouble.” I whispered shouted to her as she then woofed a bit quieter before trotting over to get some back rubs, “Let’s go see Ari.” I mumbled and out my stuff down.

I dreaded going up the stairs with each creak in the wood, I felt like a teenager sneaking back in after being out partying all night. I tiptoed down the hallway and opened up her door, sighing when I saw that she was already sleeping. I maneuvered through toys and gave her a kiss on the cheek, “Goodnight baby.”

I left her room, peering down the hallway and saw Nikki’s bedroom light was off. I went to my room to get dressed into something more comfortable. I took the Bobby pins out of my hair, sighing in relief as I ran my fingers over my scalp.

I headed back downstairs to get something to drink and a snack, “So, did you get your job back?” Nikki’s voice and the light turning on made me jump.

“Jesus, do you have to do that?” I grumbled before going to the fridge and grabbing a water.

“How was the diner?” He questioned as I glanced at him for a brief second.

“Oh yeah, uh it was okay. Still the same, really. Francisco is letting make my own schedule. So I’ll be working eight to four so maybe Clementine can pick up Arianna from school since she gets out at two.” I explained to him as he crossed his arms over his chest.

“I could pick her up too, you know? She’s my daughter.” Nikki spat out as I stared at him.

“Okay...well you can also pick her up if you want..” I mumbled to him.

“Where have you been all day? I’ve tried calling, hell, Clementine tried calling and you didn’t answer!” Nikki whisper shouted a I shook my head.

“I was busy. I went to the diner, chatted with Francisco, meant some of the new girls and-“

“How was Slash?”

I held my breath as I turned my back towards him and looked through the fridge, “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

I heard his deep exhale, “Vanity.”

I turned around to face him, his arms cross over his chest and his face a bit red, “Don’t start the lying shit with me.” He stepped a closer to me as I stood my ground and stared at him.

“Alright, fine. I met up with Slash and we grabbed dinner and caught up. Nothing happened, so there’s no need to get any thoughts into that brain of yours.” I explained to him as his arms relaxed to his sides.

Nikki shook his head, “You should have said something, Vanity. I waited around my phone all day and Arianna was acting out and kept asking me where you went.”

I laughed at his words, “Tell you I was going to be with Slash?” I laughed again, “The same guy you have such a hatred for, you wanted me to tell you that so we could’ve argued before I left?” I shook my head and tried walking out of the kitchen but he blocked me. I closed my eyes before looking up at him, “I am sorry Arianna was acting out. I told her to be good for you.”

“She wanted you, Van. Not me.” Nikki grumbled as he shifted his body weight to the arm that was extended to rest against the wall.

“Nikki, I am sorry. I just got carried away. I’m allowed to have a moment of free time without Arianna and you.” I told him and I don’t think he liked that very much.

“Vanity, I don’t care that you hung out with him. I cared that you didn’t call. We had no idea where you were at!” Nikki shouted in my face as I rolled my eyes.

“Jesus, back off Sixx. It’s not that big of a deal.” I put my hand, pushing on his chest for him to get out of my face, “I said I was sorry.”

“Van, with you being newly sober I don’t think it’s the smartest of ideas to be hanging out with Slash who just overdosed a few months before you got here.”

“And I understand that but he has been going to meetings and speaking with a therapist. He is trying and he understands what I’m going through.”

“And I don’t?!”

I stared at him, “Nikki, stop yelling at me. I didn’t do anything wrong-“

“You didn’t call! I was worried about you! That’s what you did wrong!”

I tried to move past him but again he blocked me from leaving, “I didn’t know I had to tell everyone my exact location at all times.” I scowled, “Let’s get a fucking ankle monitor. Make sure I’m not doing anything you would disapprove of.”

“Doll, that is not what I meant.” He stepped closer, placing his hand on my lower back, “Vanity, I was worried. Don’t you get that?”

I looked up at him feeling paint chipped nails graze over my skin, “You didn’t have to be worried, Nikki. I was okay. He isn’t a bad guy just because you’re still insecure.”

Nikki raised his eyebrow in surprise, “Insecure? Hm. About What?”

“You know what.” I looked up at him, “You’ve always been insecure and get all possessive over me when he’s around.”

“He placed a god damn bet on you, Van.” Nikki barked, “I dont like how he found it funny and I don’t like he looks at you like he’s going to rip off your fucking close and fuck you against a wall. If that makes me insecure so fucking be it.”

I groaned in frustration, “Nikki I am sorry alright. I’m sorry I didn’t call and I’m sorry I had you guys worried. It is not going to hurt Arianna’s development if I missed a bed time story when I have done it the last six years.” I snapped at him, “What do you want me to do? Just never leave the house again so you and Clementine don’t have to worry about what I’m doing?”

“No Vanity, that’s not...that’s not what I’m saying at all. Just, just next time call alright?” Nikki pleaded with me, “Because I don’t want to deal with Arianna asking if you went away.”

I frowned a bit, “Shut up, Nikki. She didn’t say that.”

“Yes she did. She asked if it was gonna be like New York. You think she doesn’t fucking remember the shit you pulled there? Our daughter was asking for you and just wanted to make sure mommy was coming home. Ask fucking Clementine. Arianna didn’t stop crying for an hour over you Vanity. So yeah, fucking call next time. I didn’t think I was asking much.”

I stared down at the marble flooring of the kitchen, feeling the hot gaze he had and the venom in his words as he spoke, “Yeah. I’ll call next time.”

*Next morning*

I woke up hearing Arianna’s laugh coming from downstairs. I laid in bed for a moment before getting up and rubbing my eyes. I pulled on some sweats before heading downstairs.

“Mommy!” Arianna yelled before climbing out of the chair and running to me, “Good morning baby.” I said while picking her up and holding her at my side and giving her a kiss on the cheek.

I looked at Nikki when he came over to me and gave me a quick kiss on the lips before handing me a cup of coffee, “You making breakfast?”

Nikki smiled and nodded as he went back over to the stove “Yeah, just some French toast and scrambled eggs.”

“Thank you baby.” I sat down at the table, taking a sip as I looked at what Clementine was working on, “That’s pretty.”

“Arianna gave me the idea after she pestered me for an hour about those lovely pink cupcakes in the fridge.” She shot me a glare as I grinned at her.

“Mommy, I want a cupcake.” Ari tugged on my fingers, “They looks like unicorns.” She mumbled as I shook my head.

“No, it’s too early for them. You can have one later.” She started to pout as she roughly let go of my fingers and threw my hand down, “Arianna, it’s not to early for a time out. You will get one later.”

I looked over at Clementine, “Sorry, I tried hiding them in the back but I swear, she’s a sweets and candy magnet. I brought them home from her last night. There was this cute little bakery down by the piers where we had dinner and they had some in the display window and I thought she would love them.”

“Well you showed up way past bedtime.”

I cocked my head to the side, “Only an hour past bed time, don’t be dramatic. And, I told you where I was going but you didn’t listen.”

“I had my radio up loud, what did you expect from me?” She grinned, “I tried protecting you but he went and got nosey.” She nodded over to Nikki as I glanced at him, seeing him flip the toast and munching on a piece of bacon.

“Well thank you. I needed to get out and have a little fun without him up my ass.”

Clementine pushed her drawing book to the side as I sat down, “You still could have called, Van. You gave me PTSD flashbacks when I went straight to voicemail.”

I looked away from her, letting my hand run through Arianna’s hair, attempting to tame at is as she worked in her coloring book, “I’m sorry.”

Clementine put the topic to rest with a simple nod when Nikki came over with a plate of French toast stacked high, a side of bacon and a frying pan of scrambled eggs. I watched, smiling as he cut Arianna’s French toast up for her.

“So did you meet the new singer?” I asked Nikki as he sat down and I started filling my plate up.

“No, that’s next week. Dudes up north touring with his band so we just did a phone interview.”

“...two bands? Well, how did the interview go?”

Nikki shrugged, “It was fine I guess. Arianna was with me at the office yesterday so I had to make sure she wasn’t getting into anything. He seemed like a nice guy. Could tell he was nervous. Anyways, yeah he’s in another band. The Scream, more heavier. I don’t think you’d like their music.”

“Who?” I laughed and took a bite of my toast before grinning at him, “Exactly princess.”

“I read about them in a magazine once. They aren’t too popular.” Clementine spoke, “So I’m sure he’d leave to be in Mötley.”

NikkI nodded, “Yeah, yeah he is. We already gave him a offer but we’re trying to keep it under wraps due to the band just resigning a twenty five million dollar contract with Elektra.”

“That’s a lot of money.” Clementine mumbled under her breath before taking a sip of coffee.

Nikki glanced over at me as I was wearing a poker face. That is a shit ton of money for an album that ranges from eight to ten songs. I cleared my throat and took another bite of my breakfast.

“So what’s the guys name?”

“John Corabi.”

[angrylizardjacket]

Run to Paradise {Nikki Sixx} Part 23

23. everything i’ve ever let go of has claw marks

Summary: Lola catches Roxie cheating on Tommy, and so takes back what's hers. Also Tommy's parents are there.

Warnings: NSFW, um angst ish i guess, also lola being manipulative. also this officially makes ‘but i don’t miss how we were before’ not canon compliant.

ragtag bunch of misfits: @starlalove @toofasttofallinlove  @xrosegoldwolfx @obsessivesky  @trpwthme @lovehelpmewrite @colsons-crue  @marvelismylifffe  @lilytalebi @glitterdreamsz  @freddiessmallnipples @crazysaladchopshop @inthebackofmycarlaytheirbodies @dramatique-moi @missqueeniewrites @calspixie  @aryssav @catsoo12  @sweetshutter @silvertonguedserpent  @shamelessobsessions @lavenderbones22  @keepcalm-and-beyou @scarecrowmax  @nicholeh7 @unknownoblivion

{masterlist}

Nothing any of these boys do will break her heart.

That's what Lola tells herself every day. Chants it like a mantra. Because it's not allowed to hurt. It's not allowed to be real.

They're not allowed to break her heart, because they can't. She won't let them.

They're allowed to fall in love and she's not going to care. Caring is nothing but a waste of time, especially when everyone she cares about will move on to - well, they can't move on to better things, she tells herself, a little smug and a little high, but they'll move on. So she's not allowed to get attached.

But she's lying.

Because when Nikki's not around, she feels it like a physical ache, whether she wants to or not. He's been there for so long it's like she's missing a limb. When Vince pulls her close, holds her tight, all she can think about is how they're delaying the inevitable, how he doesn't smile at her like he used to, how he'd rather be with Sharise; he doesn't say it out loud, but the insecurity won't leave her mind. And Tommy... he's so close but so, so far away. She'd loved that drummer from the moment she met him, just about, had been the first person she'd been able to admit that too, and he'd thrown it in her face in a moment of anger. She's terrified that if she touches him, feeling the way she feels, she'll burn him.

They don't even realise they're breaking her heart.

They don't think she has one, not really.

She's a toy they can fuck when they're bored, shiny and plastic with no heart to break.

So she tries to believe it.

Nothing these boys can do will break her heart.

But Tommy's parents are coming to a show, and Lola thinks she's going to scream.

"Lola!" When Doc ushers them into the lobby of the venue, and Lola's on her way to find the bar, she feels her heart stop in her chest at the bright greeting Tommy's father offers her, "it's so lovely to see you, and to see you're still with the band!"

"I'm really moving up in the world," she plasters on a smile and hears the words come out of her mouth, but doesn't really seem to register them.

"That's right, you two know Miss Gone," Doc's smiling amicably, like he and Lola weren't shouting at each other just half an hour ago, "she's the band's assistant manager now."

"Congratulations," Tommy's mother says with surprising fondness, a knowing gleam in her eyes as she pulls Lola in for a hug. When she steps back, she smiles, "Tommy always spoke so highly of you." Something about her tone, about that look, it has a lump forming in Lola's throat, and it's all she can do to smile and leave as fast as possible, tears pricking her eyes.

When she gets backstage, with a bottle of Jack in each hand and a dead-eyed stare, Nikki's busy with a groupie by the sound of it, Tommy's in the auditorium, loud and excited as he gives his parents the full tour, and so Lola sits in Vince's dressing room as he gets ready, the two of them taking a few bumps, drinking most of a bottle between them, and if she goes down on him, she does it because she's bored, not because she likes hearing the way he moans her name, his hands fisted in her hair.

There's a knock at the door followed by a moment of silence, in which Vince let's out a very strained 'just a minute' and Lola's trying not to laugh with his dick in her mouth. Doc's sigh is loud enough that they can both hear it through the door.

"Vince, Tommy's looking for you," he sounds so unbelievably beleaguered, and Lola won't even begin to process what he's saying, but she sits back on her heels so she can laugh, "and Lola?" Doc asks like he doesn't want her to actually be in there, to spare his weary existence from having to have confirmation of their activities.

"Uh-huh?" Lola half laughs in response anyways.

"We're starting sound checks soon, you're needed by the sound guys."

"Sounds like fun," she responds coyly, though she's pretty sure Doc's already moved on, not even waiting for her response.

It's not that he cares what she does with them, it's just that he's watched her spiral for the past few weeks, and knows that the more time she spends with the boys, the worse she gets.

Lola and Vince finish quickly, and Vince is zipping up his pants and heading out the door while Lola fixes her hair. Doc is back by the time she's happy with how she looks, knocking on Nikki's door. Lola's amusement sours considerably however, when the door opens, and Roxie scampers out, like a dog with it's tail between it's legs.

Blood running ice cold, Lola stopped where she had been walking behind Doc, her gaze locking with Nikki's.

"Tommy wants to introduce you to his parents," they both hear Doc say, though neither really registers it. Nikki smirks a little, like he's expecting her to be proud or amused, like fucking the girl who inadvertently hurt Lola was a joke, or payback somehow on Lola's behalf.

All it did was hurt.

Another person she loved, another person she cared about, had picked Roxie over her.

All it did was prove that Roxie didn't even care for Tommy, because Nikki wouldn't think it was as amusing as he clearly thought it was if it was a situation close to what he and Lola and the other two had. This was a secret. A terribly kept secret, but one that would hurt Tommy nonetheless.

Lola's expression turned cool, and she blinked slowly, apathy that barely concealed anger written all over her face. Without wasting another moment, she was walking to the stage.

She's supervising where one of the other roadies is running cords beneath the drum risers, arms crossed, expression dark and pensive, when Tommy walks in, brimming with enthusiasm.

"Check this out!" He announces, "Pyro coming out of those;" he points out a few of the pyrotechnic devices before making a beeline for the rocks by his drumrisers, making a show of struggling to lift them, before lifting them with ease, showing off that they're fake as his parents laugh along. "Ma, dad, you remember -" his voice catches in his throat as his eyes land on Lola, and she looks at him. It's the first time they've looked each other in the eyes since the start of the tour, and his expression falls. Lola's, curiously enough, softens, just a little, barely noticeably to anyone who's not paying close attention.

"Yes, we met dear Lola in the, uh," Tommy's mother struggles to find the word, missing the shift in mood from both her son and Lola, and his father quietly fills in 'lobby' for her, still smiling. Tommy turns to his mother, smiling, seeming to be relieved when Nikki and Doc step into view and he can change the subject quickly.

"And this is the Sixxter."

Nikki high fives him like he hadn't had his dick in Tommy's girlfriend only minutes before, and Lola's lip curls in quiet disgust. She's well aware she's a hypocrite, but she can't bring herself to care.

"It's so good to finally meet you," Tommy's mother hugs Nikki the way she'd hugged Lola, and Lola's pretty sure the confusion and slight discomfort that reads on Nikki's face had read on hers at the time. Or maybe he's feeling guilty about Tommy, but she doubts it.

Tommy's father shakes Nikki's hand, declares it a pleasure to meet him, and Nikki scowls as Doc offers to fly his family out to meet them all. Despite everything that's happened in the past five minutes, Nikki and Lola make eye contact, sharing a moment of solidarity as Nikki rolls his eyes, and Lola mimes shooting herself in the head, at the mere suggestion of family.

But then Tommy's brimming with excitement again, calling for Roxie to come meet his parents, and Nikki's trying to hide behind his hair.

"Mom, dad, this is Roxie. My fiance."

What.

That seems to be news to everyone, Nikki included, but Roxie's wearing a sharp smile as she offers her hand to Tommy's mother.

"Nice to meet you." Roxie sounds disinterested, and Lola wants to throw something.

"We're getting married!" Tommy announces with a grin, though his parents just seemed confused.

"What's the rush, Tom? Marriage is a big decision," his father sounds hesitant, though Tommy's not even a little bit concerned, his arm around Roxie's shoulders.

"Exactly! You proposed to mom the night you guys met and she didn't even speak English! That's love, dude!" He gave Roxie a squeeze and Nikki was already heading backstage, probably to drink away the memory of his astoundingly regrettable decision. "That's what I've always wanted! And that's what I've got," he gave a lovesick look to Roxie, and Lola was about to hurl herself into the orchestra pit when Tommy's mother turned, giving her a confused look. Lola just shrugged helplessly.

"So," his mother turned back with an unconvincing smile, "how did you and Tommy meet?" At this, Roxie does actually perk up.

"Well, I was actually hanging around this other band, but then, I met Tommy," she sighed in a good imitation of fondness, shrugging and smiling, "and it was totally meant to be."

"Oh, I know this word!" Tommy's mother smiles, glancing over her shoulder at Lola, who was trying to ignore the whole interaction and get on with her job. Looking back, muttering the equivalent in Greek before she finds it in English, there's a sharp look in her eyes, "groupie. Like Lola used to be, yes? Is that how they call you?"

Lola freezes upon hearing this, caught between wanting so desperately to laugh, and also knowing it would just ruin everything further.

Tommy's mother raises an eyebrow at Roxie, who casts a stony look at Tommy himself, and then to Lola, who was trying desperately to keep her poker face. When she storms off, Lola clears her throat in lieu of laughter, and heads off to the other side of the stage.

"Mom!" Tommy hisses, "not cool!"

"I don't understand, you say that word all the time like it's the best thing in the world!"

"Not the- I mean the groupie thing's not cool either, but the Lola thing - they're different -" Tommy groans, and his father frowns a little.

"We were under the impression that you and Lola were together -"

"Well we're not, dude, not anymore!" Tommy snaps, and without even meaning to, he catches sight of Lola, smiling to herself, coiling a cord and trying to keep busy, and his heart aches just a little. For the barest moment, she meets his gaze irritated gaze, and surprisingly, she gives a soft, somewhat apologetic smile.

Through the show, Lola's by his parent's side, smiling at him like she used to, and Roxie's on the other side of the stage, dancing, and occasionally scowling when she spots Lola. Roxie's distant that night, maybe it's out of guilt, maybe out of anger, but when Tommy's parents retire to their hotel for the night, and the band stays out partying, Roxie disappears.

"She's tired," Tommy informs them, and Lola nods sympathetically, pleased that already the plan she'd formulated after seeing Roxie leave Nikki's room would be put in to action.

All night Lola's by Tommy's side, smiling and laughing and drinking and snorting.

"Hey, dude, I-" at the start of the night, before even stepping foot into the bar, she'd pulled Tommy aside, "I'm really sorry about the past few weeks," she laughs a little self consciously, putting on an act of humility, "I've missed you like crazy."

"I've missed you too, Lols," he admits, wrapping her up in a hug that he knows his fiance won't see, since she'd already gone inside.

But to Lola? Oh, it felt like she could breathe freely again. Perhaps she'd missed him more than she'd like to let on; she was just trying to manipulate him, to get him back to her, to get back at Roxie, and Nikki to an extent, she hadn't meant to mean it.

So she's by his side all night, careful not to touch him, but to always be smiling, matching him drink for drink, line for line, smile for smile. The rest of the band disappears to their own debauched antics, but Lola and Tommy are side by side in a booth. Her knee touches his under the table while she's doing a line; it's the first contact she's consciously allowed. Tommy's hand automatically comes to rest on her thigh.

"I'm sorry," Lola says when she raises her head, and Tommy gives her a confused look, but doesn't move his hand. For a moment Lola considers telling him outright about Nikki and Roxie, but ultimately she knew she wouldn't benefit from it, "I'm sorry I called your girlfriend a bitch -"

"Fiance." Tommy corrected quietly, and Lola nodded.

"You were right," she told him with as much sincerity as she could muster, "I was jealous." Looking him in the eyes, she can see it when cracks start to appear in his booze soaked mind. She knew exactly how to pry them open, to get inside and get what she wanted. "I'm - I'm not like you, I don't know how to love properly, I'm not -"

"Lols..." Tommy tried to find the words, but he couldn't. Lola very deliberately moved out of his grip.

"But I wanted to, you know?" With a sad smile, she leaves so much unspoken that he can read into, in the way she's looking at him.

"I - Lols, you know I still love you, right?" The words fall from his lips, they hang in the air as if neither knows quite how to follow that declaration.

"You're not allowed to," Lola gently and deliberately cups his jaw with her hand, just as she had done a million times before.

"Fuck that, I'm allowed to do whatever I want! Dude, I've known you for like, four years, that's like, my whole adult life - me being with Roxie's not going to change the fact that I lo -"

"It should!" Lola told him, both hands holding his face, looking him in the eyes, "baby, you shouldn't have loved me then, and you shouldn't love me now! I'm not the sort of girl you bring home to your parents!" And it's the final nail in the coffin; she can see the cogs turning in his head because his parents do know her, they do like her, more than Roxie, and she's doing an incredible job of acting like she just wants the best for him, not that he knows it's an act. He'd been blinded by love, he tells himself, taking Roxie's side and trying to cut out Lola who'd he'd been so close to for so many years, throwing an actual friendship away for a woman who'd proposed to him while high, mumbling something later about wanting to 'lock him down'.

When he kisses Lola it's hard and insistent, and the old creature of jealousy that sits firm in her chest crows with triumph.

Mine.

"Fuck," he breathes against her lips, and Lola pulls back, stammers through an apology, but Tommy's shaking his head, grin on his lips, "no, I - fuck, I missed you." He's murmuring, before he pulls her close.

Lola takes very little convincing to go back to the hotel, back to her room where they won't be disturbed. Though she's always been adamant that she doesn't make a point of marking boys with bitchy, jealous-type girlfriends, which is exactly what Roxie is, Lola can't help herself.

Her teeth on his shoulder.

He's mine.

Her nails scraping down his back.

He's mine.

She pulls his hair like she knows he likes, just to hear him gasp, just to see him grin, and knows quietly that Roxie would never care to know him as well as she did.

When he wakes in the morning, it's with a confusing mix of guilt and elation, already late for breakfast with his parents and Roxie. Pulling on a shirt from Lola's suitcase that he recognizes as one of his, he's hit with a strange and sincere fondness, that despite everything that had happened, she still takes some small comfort in him.

And then he's frantically checking for hickeys.

"Don't worry," Lola says through a yawn, "I didn't leave any where anyone could see them," she chuckles, warm and sleepy, "or at all, honestly, but after breakfast, I suggest a good, long shower to get rid of your - sorry -" she adds, acting just a touch guilty, "scratches." She pauses, "you know, scrubbing hard and stuff."

Tommy gave her a small smile, but can't bring himself to say anything. Filled with both regret, and soft adoration, he can't find the words to fill the silence that stretches between them.

"I am sorry," Lola adds gently, playing at being sincere, despite how thoroughly pleased she really felt.

And finally, Tommy finds his voice.

"Don't be."

[xx-sikki-nixx-xx]

Pantie thief

Not requested 

Warnings: swearing, angst to begin with but mostly fluff 

"Mom, dad meet the Sixxter" Tommy smiles as Nikki meets his best friends parents. They all turn and look when they see Vince running with his hands full of clothes and laughing like a maniac followed by a very pissed off (y/n) in nothing but a bra and panties "VINCE I SWEAR TO GOD GIVE ME MY FUCKING CLOTHES BACK YOU PIECE OF SHIT" I scream chasing the blonde around set "NEVERRRRR" he screams back still cackling with laughter "what the fuck" Nikki mutters watching the scene play out in front of them "i-is this normal?" Tommy's mom asked looking at her son concernedly" Tommy smiles and shakes his head "yeah" 

TIMESKIP 

Everything is quiet on the bus until (y/n pokes her head round the door from the bathroom "can anyone explain why I don't have any Bras or panties?" I say clearly annoyed "nope haven't seen em" Nikki mutters from behind a newspaper "don't look at me" Tommy adds, Mick sighs "sorry kid don't ask me" I shake my head "right let me rephrase the question, Vince what have you done with my panties?" He looks up at me as innocently as a guilty person can look "I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about" I step out of the bathroom in a pair of black high waisted jeans and a sleeveless motley crue T shirt "Vince I don't have a SINGLE bra or pair of panties and your telling me you had NOTHING to do with it?" He puts his hands up in defeat "why would you think that I had anything to do with it?" I bite the inside of my cheek in an attempt to not lose my shit "oh I don't know maybe because you're always taking my clothes?" Mick stretches and glares at Vince "blondie give the girl her clothes back" Vince's grin only grows bigger "if she wants them back she can come and get them" he stands up and reveals a handful of my panties and bras that he was sitting on "oh that's fucking it" I yell before jumping on him and tacking him to the ground "give them back Neil you bitch" I growl struggling to get the garments out of his hands "ok ok I've got a deal for you (y/n) he squrms "but you gotta get off me first" I stand up and brush myself off and he does the same "right so what's this deal then Vince, let's hear it" I sigh trying to catch my breath and putting a hand on my hip, I look behind Vince to see all of the other boys staring at us excitedly and I hear Tommy whisper to Nikki "do you think he's gonna do it?" And Nikki reply "shut up and listen T-bone" I roll my eyes "hurry up Vince I don't have all day "alright, alright I'll give you your clothes back if you...go on a date with me?" I stop in my tracks and turn a deep shade of red "well?" He smiles shyly and I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding "you promise you won't take my clothes ever again?" He nods his head "I promise" I flash him a smile "then yes Vince Neil I will go on a date with you but it better be a good one" I point my finger at him "I wouldn't settle for anything less". 

Let me know if you like it 😁

[charlottemariechadwick]

Performance

Performer Cast Member: Timon of Athens, Summer Shakespeare, Wellington, 2015 Performer: Tall Poppies: Four Violences Theatre Research Group, The University of Melbourne, 2013 Performer: E-motion in Motion workshop collective project with Yumi Umiumare and Bambang N Karim, The University of Melbourne, 2012 Mrs Alison McCroy: Zombie! The Musical, The Rock Opera Company, The University of Melbourne, 2012 Improvisor: The Safety Device of Elisha Otis, Auckland Fringe Festival, 2010 Performer: Blind Building, Performance art, London, 2010 Dr Expert: “The Scottish Play”, in Shakespeare’s Ladies, The Luvvies, Finger’s Piano Bar, Edinburgh Fringe Festival, 2009 Sophie: “This Year’s Thing” The Luvvies, Edinburgh, 2009 Lucy: Promotional DVD, Random films, Wellington, 2005 Liz: Exchange Young and Hungry Festival, Bats Theatre Wellington 2005 Chorus: Dido and Aeneas, Boutique Opera, Wellington Fringe Festival, 2004 Chorus/solos: Gilbert and Sullivan excerpts, Boutique Opera, Wellington, 2004 Marian Paroo: The Music Man, Otaki Players, Otaki, 2002 Voiceover: Poem and short story for audio CD for schools (Mountains, Choices series), Learning Media, Wellington, 2002 Maria Marten: The Murder of Maria Marten/Murder in the Red Barn, Otaki Players, Otaki, 2002 Anita: West Side Story, Otaki Players, Otaki, 2001 Survival: Photoshoot for Ministry of Education book (Choices series) Learning Media, Wellington, 2001 Daisy: Daisy Pulls It Off, Kapiti Playhouse, Paraparaumu, 2001 Hodel: Fiddler on the Roof, Otaki Players, Otaki, 2000 Judy Garland: Movie Musical Magic, Coasters, Paraparaumu, 2000 Girl Singer: Bugsy Malone, Kapiti Playhouse, Paraparaumu, 1999

Director & Dramaturg Dramaturg: Jagged Little Pilgrimage, Wellington Fringe Festival, 2016 Director: Graphina, The University of Auckland

Training, Workshops & Internships Physical Theatre Workshop: The Dig Collective, 2014 Butoh Workshop: E-motion in Motion Yumi Umiumare and Bambang N Karim, The University of Melbourne, 2012 Playwriting Workshop: Declan Greene/Sixxters Grimm, The University of Melbourne, 2012 Rehearsal Room Intern: Every Second, Playwriting Australia’s National Play Festival, Melbourne, 2012

[xxisxxisxxis]

Gateway Drug | Part Twenty-Eight

Table of Content or Part Twenty-Seven

Pairing: Douglas Booth!Nikki Sixx x OC

Word Count: 2.1k

Warning(s): Language, Hints at drug abuse

Tag List: @unknownoblivion @sinningsixx @edwardtriggerhandzz @lemmyjelly @haileynicoleseavey17 @cierrasixx19 @oskea93 @mgkobsessed @vamprlestat @sharon6713 @itsametaphorbriansblog @miriampraez @allie-mcginn @rebeccaphillips14 @nicholeh7 @fandomshit6000 @lilmou5ie @tamedhearts @divaanya @kingbouji3 @evrsncnewyork @6ixx6ixx @ratedrkohardychick91 @floregrohlssard @oldschoolimagineblog @thanks2pete @abaldboi @swoopygorl @justjodeye @liith-ium @caos18blog @ytwahsog @shamlessobsessions @scarecrowmax @toadspleen @random-internet-user-4471 @solohqrry @loveofmyloif @sparxx27 @kaitieskidmore1 @xpoisonousrosesx @ijustwanttokiss70srogertaylor

LET ME KNOW IF YOU WANT TO BE TAGGED

-------------------------------------------------------

Once we get on the road, I glance over at Nikki before reaching for his free hand, lacing my fingers through his.

I notice him side eye me before smirking to himself.

We park a block down from the Rainbow and when I get out, I regret not wearing pants.

It's not freezing by any means, but it's in the mid 60s with a little wind blowing.

A small shiver runs through me, and Nikki's locking the car and sliding his jacket off, handing it to me.

"Thank you." I say to him, putting it on and thanking God he creates as much body heat as he does because it's like a portable heater.

"Mmhmm." He replies. "I don't know why you didn't bring your jacket."

"It wouldn't have looked good with this." I state in terms of my outfit.

"You can wear anything and still look good." He tells me flatly as if it's common sense and I rub my red lips together and hook my hand around his arm.

We get into the Rainbow and step to our booth, Vince, Tommy and Mick already laughing their asses off over something, and when we get to them Tommy's practically shoving his tongue down Nikki's throat.

"Sixxter!" He tipsily exclaims, putting his arm over Nikki's shoulders and kissing his cheek. "Fuckin' missed you, man." He tells him and Nikki chuckles as I slide in beside him, taking his jacket off of me.

There's lingering groupies as always, although there's more of them now than before the guys had a decent amount of fame.

I feel skin rub against my leg, which confirms there's a girl under the table giving someone a blow job and I roll my eyes.

Nikki orders a beer, I get a Pepsi, and a brunette groupie that's got her eyes on Nikki gets a high dose of audacity and utilizes it.

"Can I have a sip of that?" She asks Nikki when he gets his beer and I raise my brows, turning to glare at her, and then him, when he looks me in the eye, smirks, and hands her the beer.

The guys are completely silent, studying me to gauge my reaction and I roll my jaw.

"Down Kitty." Vince jokes as the girl hands Nikki's bottle back, making sure to make a show of wiping the drop of beer left on her bottom lip with her manicured fingers, not looking away from him.

"Thanks." She says, glancing at me as if to brag, and I ignore her and look straight ahead, not giving her the satisfaction of getting a reaction out of me...I'll handle Devil Spawn when we get home.

I just get up, mumbling that I'm going to the bathroom.

"Baby, c'mon, it was a joke." Nikki chuckles out.

"Lick my clit." I snap at him, not giving him a second glance before stepping to the bathroom, hearing Vince and Tommy "Ohh" and "Damn" at my harsh response to him.

I get in the bathroom, tears lining my eyes, and see a mass of fluffy blonde hair standing at the mirror beside the one I end up standing in front of.

First glance, I think it's a woman...Second glance, maybe?

I take a third look, realizing it's a man touching up his foundation and I mind my own business and stop my mascara from running by grabbing a paper towel out of the dispenser quick enough to catch the pair of tears trying to leak out of my eyes.

Something falls into the sink infront of me and I furrow my brows and look down, seeing a tube of mascara.

I look at the only one that it could belong to and pick the tube back up, handing it out to him.

"You can use some when you get done crying your's off." He tells me calmly, his accent a dead give away that he's certainly not from around here, continuing to touch up his own makeup.

I go to argue but he cuts me short.

"It's mascara, not a used needle."

He's got a point and I can't help but smile a little at his response, continuing to dab at my eyes with the papertowel, drying my tears.

"I have to use the girl's room because I get in to fights any time a guy walks in and I'm putting on makeup." He explains to me. "I don't like being called a 'fag'."

"You don't have to explain yourself to me." I assure him, throwing the paper towel away. "And if being a 'fag' means you wear more makeup than most women but still have chicks throwing themselves at you, then so be it."

I reapply my mascara and hand it back to him, saying an appreciative "thanks" just as the bathroom door bursts open.

"Babe, c'mon, you gotta come meet this dude, you're gonna fuckin' freak." Nikki tells me, his hand wrapping around my wrist.

"What? Who?" I furrow my brows.

"Razzle."

"Who's that-"

"Hanoi Rocks' drummer?" He reminds me. "They're touring here and we just met him, like, right after you left and..." Nikki trails off, noticing the blonde dude in the bathroom with us.

"By all means, go on." He nods to Nikki with a proud smile on his face that completely frames his high cheek bones and wide, blue eyes.

I found out in that moment I had shared eyelash germs with the one and only Michael Monroe, lead singer of Hanoi Rocks.

I'd heard their music through Nikki and  Tommy, and Duff really dug them, too.

I remember thinking Mike was the most beautiful man I had ever seen. Like Axl Rose, he looked like a really gorgeous woman at certain angles, and I hated them for it because they really didn't know how freaking flawless they looked.

Michael didn't just have an abnormally beautiful exterior, his spirit, heart, and soul, were just as phenomenal and that made a lasting impact on me so much so that I named one of my children after him.

I discovered the kind of person he was in December of 1984 when tradgedy struck Hanoi Rocks and Mötley Crüe and he and his bandmate Andy McCoy stayed with me and Nikki for a little bit.

I'll get into all that soon.

I step out of the bathroom after Nikki and Michael talk a bit and exchange numbers, and Nikki guides me to our table and I hear a thick british accent before I can see Razzle that well.

He's got on a top hat with a red scarf tied around it, his sunglasses resting on the rim of it, a polkadotted tie is around his neck and he's wearing a dark red velvet overcoat.

His eyes are lined with black liner and he's showing off a mouthful of teeth with his contagious smile.

"Razz, man, this is Viv." Nikki introduces me.

"This your missus?" He asks him in disbelief, and I don't know if it's a good thing or bad thing he's asking it that way. "Oh, she's beautiful, Nikki...what the bloody hell is she doin' with you?" He chuckles at his own joke and the guys join in while Nikki laughs it off with them.

"Nah, the real star is Tansy." Vince informs him as Nikki and I sit down.

"Who?" Razzle asks and Vince and Tommy look completely offended before Vince is pulling his wallet out and grabbing a piece of paper out of it.

Once he unfolds it, it's an entire page torn out of an issue of Playboy, and I'm assuming Tansy is somewhere on it because he points to something to show Razzle and the drummer's mouth drops open and his eyes get wide.

"I definitely want to meet her." He comments and I reach across the table and snatch the paper from Vince and crumple it up.

"Viv!" He whines at me, trying to reach for it over the table and I shove it in my bra and raise my brows at him. "That just makes me wanna get it even more." He informs me.

"If you want me to castrate you with my nails, you'll reach down my shirt." I promise and him, Nikki, Tommy, Mick, and Razzle wince at the thought.

"That's fine. I'll get all I want when our girl's December issue comes out." Vince smirks, winking at me and I roll my eyes.

"Swine." I insult him.

"Prude." He shoots back before his face gets suddenly really smug as if he remembers something. "Actually..." He fumbles with his wallet again before pulling out a polaroid. "...I suppose I should stop calling you that."

He waves it, Razzle and Mick looking over his shoulder at it.

"Woah." Razzle mumbles.

"Don't be a fucking dick, Vince." Mick scolds him as Vince turns the picture for me to see.

It's me, wearing nothing but a pair of heels, on our mattress at home with my legs spread wide open, touching myself with my back arched, eyes closed, and lips parted in ecstasy.

I feel Nikki tense up beside me as embarassment and humiliation floods through me.

My face is burning red and I'm rendered speechless, glaring at Nikki, who's snatching it away from Vince.

"Where the fuck did you get this?!" He barks at him.

"The fuck are you talking about, Nikki, you fucking gave it to me." Vince argues.

"When?!"

"You were fucked up and gave one to me and one to Robbin." He adds and I snap my attention to my husband.

"You were just passing out our pictures?! What's next, making copies of our tape and tossing them into the audience at shows?!"

"You have a sex tape?!" Tommy suddenly pipes but it goes unacknowledged.

"Fucking bullshit, I've never been that fucked up where I'd willingly give you pictures of her like this!" Nikki throws at Vince.

Vince looks at him pointedly, his index finger hitting over the vein in the crook of his arm as if it were a needle and Nikki realizes he did indeed give him the picture, he just doesn't remember, because he was stoned out of his mind on smack.

If Razzle wouldn't have been Razzle, we would've scared him away and he never would've wanted to hangout with us again.

But he kept quiet and never once brought it up.

It's safe to say the Sixxes leave notorious first impressions.

[cursedmotleycrueimages]

https://youtu.be/JjL1Jnnph_g 3:40 thats the answered for the anon 👀💦💦💦💦💦

Thanks sixxter for that noise

Nikki: *breathes*

Me: well shit I'm horny now