#should i be warning people about that?
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macverse · 2 years ago
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My Bloody Nights with Mr. Evans
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By the end of the evening, the haphazardly spilled bloody mary wasn't the only thing staining the table linens a deep red.
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Mr. Evans hardly ever surprises me. I say hardly because the day that I found out he's a murderer I was surprised.
Back then, I'd been working for Mr. Evans for about five months. I came on to help manage the staff of his New England estate as his personal assistant. Unlike some of my past personal assistant jobs, the position is a full-time role that required me to be available 24/7 so I was given rooms on the property. Nothing too fancy. It was only a room in the part of the estate that was designated for the staff. The whole thing was a bit of a lifestyle shock having come from living in the city to the remote, quiet neighborhood of Massachusetts’ one percent. When I took the position, I'd wondered why my predecessor had left but I could never quite figure out what happened and the inability to find out anything became less odd as time went on.
My employer, Mr. Evans, is the sole inheritor of his family's international import and export conglomerate. Making him both wealthy, and well-known in the business world. His industry experience has afforded him many friends and business partners not only in the shipping empire but also in various enterprises. He's not only popular because of his wealth and business expertise but also for his exceptional prowess in the kitchen as well as for being an incredibly handsome, eligible bachelor.
Mr. Evans is always perfectly coiffed and clothed. His thick dark brown hair is always immaculately moussed, swept back from his face, and parted perfectly without a hair out of place. His beard is always groomed and trimmed accenting his chiseled face. His wardrobe is selected by an esteemed fashion stylist from designers all over the world and immaculately cared for by a tailor on the estate. You will never catch Mr. Evans looking disheveled.
I obviously didn't care or find any of that appealing or distracting. I have been PA to many wealthy, attractive businessmen who've tried their best to sway me into comfortable sugar-baby arrangements. I'm aware that I am a beautiful, young woman who could easily live a life of luxury on the whims of a wealthy man. I could easily allow myself to be lavished with extravagant gifts and whisked off to private islands at the drop of a hat. Money and power have never impressed me. And it sure is not enough to sacrifice the future of my career.
Back when I originally started I hardly ever spoke to Mr. Evans. We would meet at exactly 7:45 am in the small meeting room between Mr. Evans’s at-home office and a grand library that no one seems to use. From the beginning, I got the impression that Mr. Evans is a very precise individual and that he prefers tasks to be performed in the way he expects. I also gathered that he's not one to show a lot of emotion. I tried once or twice to get him to even slightly smile during our meetings but gave up when my jests kept falling flat.
Our meetings would run for no longer than thirty minutes to review any open items from the previous day and the schedule for the day ahead as well as any future plans he wanted me to handle. From there, I would hand off his schedule to his drivers and business analyst Luke, a newer staff member like myself, and set out to accomplish any tasks he'd assigned. During the rest of the day, I wouldn't see Mr. Evans unless any major things occurred that required his attention. Part of my job was to make sure that there was nothing that needed Mr. Evans's attention so most days I wouldn't see him again until the following morning.
My position was surprisingly much more simple than any of my previous positions. Unlike the households of my most recent employers who were new to their wealth and needed me to bring order to their new lives, everyone on staff had either been on the estate since the late Mr. and Mrs. Evans had maintained the property. Luke and I were the only new employees. There weren't that many things that didn't already have a set course of action that everyone already seemed to know. So I spent most of my day learning about my new employer, the history of the property, and making sure everyone had everything they needed. It wasn't until after a winter-themed dinner party to celebrate the forthcoming solstice that I noticed things on the Evans estate were not as simple as they seemed.
The morning after the dinner party was not anything I'd come to expect.
Read the rest on my AO3
https://archiveofourown.org/works/43867305
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justaz · 7 months ago
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arthur (prince of camelot) still has to study under a tutor bc yknow uther wants him to be very intelligent before becoming king or something bc its super important idk idc anyways merlin is doing chores in his chambers while arthur is squinting at a book and merlin eventually caves and asks him what he’s reading and arthur gruffly explains that its a collection of stories from greece that make absolutely no sense so merlin asks him to read them outloud to him. arthur of course teases him and calls him an idiot and asks how he could possibly help but does as he’s asked and reads the stories to merlin as he does his chores. merlin (being crushed under the weight of destiny and tormented by the prophecies that kilgharrah spews) understands the stories almost immediately and gets all excited and starts rambling about them with arthur. arthur is glad to have someone who understands so he can give something that reflects a hint of understanding to his tutor who accepts it and moves onto the next unit of education.
the thing is, arthur finds more stories in camelot’s library and brings them up to his room to read them aloud to merlin under the guise of completing his studies but really he just wants to watch as merlin’s eyes gleam when he understands whats happening and listen to him ramble on and on about them bc he’s gay. the stories stick with merlin though and he realizes that they’re cautionary tales, that the heroes who were told too much of their future doomed themself to fulfill them - that them fighting the prophecies led to their completion. merlin takes it to heart and gives a big “fuck you” to kilgharrah before forging his own fate and helping morgana with her magic and handing out an olive branch to mordred and now everyone can live happily and peacefully in an albion teeming with magic.
#merlin and arthur are of course at each others side in the end#merlin is curled up with arthur in their bed and says a silent thank you to his king for saving him#arthur returns the sentiment wholeheartedly#bbc merlin#merlin emrys#arthur pendragon#merthur#fic idea#fanfic#fanfiction#headcanon#hc#head canon#merthur prompt#i have my own hc of fate vs destiny in bbc merlin and i like to incorporate that into everything i write#but then i realize that not everyone thinks that way lmao#i like to think that destiny is unavoidable. merlin and arthur are destined to form albion and lead it together#i think fate is like a fragile version of destiny#i think most people are tied to fate and will follow what they are fated to do unless those who arent tied down by fate change course#like i hc that seers are able to see the potential future of what is to happen should they not interfere#and the goddess leaves it up to them to choose. so like seers arent tied down by fate and can change the course of history#since merlin is literally magic incarnate i also think he isnt tied down by fate and can act to change things#kilgharrah told merlin the prophecy that would result in the dragon getting free and ending the pendragon line#and since merlin never got close w like any druids or magic users. no one told him the inner workings of fate vs destiny#so he listened to the dragons warnings dooming him to fulfill the prophecy that brought about one of the worst possible futures#bc the dragon was salty about his whole species being eradicated by uther and vowed to destroy the pendragon line#omg im ranting okay post over thank you and good night
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coquelicoq · 5 months ago
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just finished my rewatch so i am here to bring you the important fax, such as:
how many dramatic thunderstorms take place over the course of 40 episodes of the double?
the answer may surprise you!
episode 1. the og. xue fangfei is buried alive by her husband, who then goes in for a lil psychological torture courtesy of the princess. meanwhile, su-guogong kicks down the door of a contraband salt warehouse and does a sick spin onto the back of a chair completely unnecessarily. for the aesthetic. you really get your bang for your buck with this one because it also features in at least ELEVEN separate flashbacks in later episodes (episodes 4, 7, 9 (three FBs), 11, 13, 17, 24, 27, and 32, to be specific).
episode 7. shen yurong comes to the jiang residence to give "jiang li" an entrance exam for fancy pants academy. she drops hella hints to her true identity and keeps bringing up how much it sucked to be abandoned on that mountain :) while a storm rages around them much akin to the one that made the whole live burial thing especially dramatic. as if being buried alive needed additional pathos.
episode 13. xue fangfei is called before the jiang family tribunal because she's got some explaining to do about what happened at the palace banquet (where, if you recall, jiang ruoyao attempted to set her up to be violated and disgraced, and instead found their cousin in bed with jry's fiance). of course our girl wipes the floor with these amateurs. she's bringing melodramatic precipitation to the table, and what do they have, a face wound? god's least favorite soldier (the concubine's son)? please. you gotta get up earlier in the morning than that to pull one over on this fake ex-nun.
episode 14. this one is maybe the funniest to me from a doylist perspective because it's just one single thunderclap/lightning bolt right after the emperor says to xiao heng, the princess hates you. she might even try...to KILL YOU. like bro this is not news to anybody lol. but at least the universe has a sense of dramatic timing. there is no other sign of this storm, not even rainfall, in any other part of the episode...the emperor summoned a stormcloud just for that one sentence and then was like okay i got what i needed, run along now.
episode 17. wins the award for cutest rainstorm. a drunk xue fangfei holds xiao heng's cheeks very insistently between her hands, looking up into his eyes as rain falls in her face. he takes off his utterly sodden cloak and wraps it around her shoulders, surely doing absolutely nothing w/r/t keeping her dry but at least seeming very tender about it. the rain is obviously integral to the scene, but i think the thunder and lightning are mainly here because someone involved with this production really likes thunder and lightning. we also get a flashback to this one in...
episode 18. the metaphorical masturbation scene (xue fangfei lies in a tub artfully draped in fabric nuzzling the soft petals of a rose while xiao heng does half-naked swordplay dripping with rain). again i think somebody was just having a lot of fun with the thunderstorm effects on set that day. rain would have been sufficient, but if there's one thing you can say about this show, it's that everyone involved agreed that "sufficient" will not suffice. we are not here to regular-ass things. we are here to double- or even triple-ass them. and when in doubt on how to achieve that, add some fucking meteorological event. some kind of audiovisual spectacle. it's literally coming down from the heavens. what, are we gonna ask for subtlety? from this show? not if we know what's good for us.
episode 20. xue fangfei has just asked the auntie down the street in huaixiang to testify on her father's behalf, getting down on her knees and begging, only to have the door shut in her face. ouch. if that's not prime time for some rain to mingle with her tears, her surroundings reflecting her inner state, i don't know what is. it's giving textbook pathetic fallacy.
episode 25. ji shuran meets with the imperial diviner who turns out to be her long lost lover she thought she had successfully burned to death!!! (ohhh sidenote i am just now getting the jsr-syr parallel with this.) honestly if they had neglected to punctuate this scene with thunder and lightning i would have been metaphorically holding the back of my hand up to the production's forehead to check for fever. it would not be a sign of health, given this show's general baseline.
episode 27. xue fangfei meets with jiang yuanbai's concubine, hu-yiniang, trying to convince her to help xue fangfei fuck ji shuran's shit right up. the weather didn't help her recruit the huaixiang auntie, but it works like a charm on auntie hu. (i'm choosing to believe the weather is a sentient entity and it's showing up to drench xue fangfei like a wet cat at irregular intervals like ⛈ im helping 🥰)
episode 28. the exorcism. fuck yes there's a thunderstorm during the exorcism. what are we even doing here if the showdown between olympic-grade synchronized charlatan choreography and mad-with-grief-mother-approved creepy ventriloquism isn't punctuated by bolts of lightning? don't waste my time. perfectly timed thunderclaps or gtfo.
episode 29. gotta have some thunder and lightning while visiting the tombstone of your brother who isn't actually dead (but you don't know that). definitely gotta have some rain so your crush can show up out of nowhere and lovingly hold an umbrella over your head. that's just basic science. step 4.7 of the water cycle.
episode 30. xue fangfei comes to the academy to rehearse the duet for the zhao envoy and dun dun dunnnn...only shen yurong is there!!! i am feeling distinctly menaced, but on her behalf, or on his? hard to say. on the one hand, he did attempted-murder her. on the other hand, she's xue fucking fangfei and he's the chump who attempted-murdered her. sweet dreams, bucko.
episode 35. consort li visits the princess in an attempt to get her diagnosed with Pregnancy...out of wedlock!! lots of thunder but no lightning until shen yurong shows up afterward and is like, hey honey i figured out how to solve this problem, just marry this totally other dude 👍 wanning is Not having a good day and the weather got the memo.
episode 39. what would u even do if ur lover poisoned you & took that opportunity to rescue his ex-wife from ur dungeon & walked out holding her in a bridal carry (after using knockout gas on her, natch) & when he saw u he tenderly placed her down out of the rain? what would u do if u had the hairpin u thought he had given u as a sincere token of love and commitment & this hairpin was sharp enough to impale a person & u could put it in his hand pointed toward u & then u could pull his hand right into ur abdomen? WHAT WOULD U DO if all this was the case BUT THERE WAS NO THUNDER AND LIGHTNING WHILE THIS WAS GOING DOWN?? i think i would just NOT impale myself on my own hairpin using my traitorous lover's hand. out of PIQUE. i know weather patterns are driven by atmospheric forces or whatever but come on man. that would just be rude. so thankfully the weather showed up to give the princess the dramatic accompaniment her iconic death scene deserved. she died as she lived: dangerous, vulnerable, electrifying. i'm buying the effects people a round for this one. they made it count.
so, 14 individual thunderstorms, plus at least 10 flashbacks* to one of those thunderstorms, for (at minimum) 24 total scenes featuring thunderstorms in 40 episodes. *(i say "at least" because i probably missed some. and there are 12 FBs mentioned in this post, but two of them were being remembered while another thunderstorm was taking place, so their scenes have already been included in the count of 24.) and that is not even counting 1) lightning in an imaginary what-if scene in episode 6 in which xiangqiao (one of jsr's planted servants) says "if i'm lying, strike me with lightning!" or 2) the magical lightning strikes that jiang ruoyao and/or xue fangfei may or may not create during the guqin exam cgi extravaganza in episode 11 (kinda hard to tell if that was lightning or not). if you count those too you start to wonder if the crew was getting some kind of bulk discount on lightning bolts from the lightning bolt factory...but that's none of my business 😌
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hassians-sernuk-boyfriend · 3 months ago
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I am so sane about this guy and his relationship to nature tbh
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babsaros · 4 months ago
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they talk about testosterone gel like it’s the fentanyl of hrt
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pansyfemme · 28 days ago
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mr jude pansyfemme i must notify you that you and your reblogs make up 90% of my feed and i enjoy every second of it i love you
i love you too we are walking into the sunset together
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dailymanners · 9 months ago
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If it can be helped, avoid making sudden loud noises around others without giving them a warning first that you're about to make a sudden loud sound.
If you absolutely need to make a sudden loud sound for whatever reason (for example testing your home's smoke alarm) warn the people around you within earshot first (such as your housemates who are home at the time you're going to test the smoke alarm)
First of all, PTSD is far more common than many might think, and sudden loud sounds are a very common trigger for PTSD.
Or even if someone doesn't have PTSD they can still be startled or frightened by a sudden loud sound, and obviously it's pretty unpleasant to be startled or frightened. But also, you never know who around you might have PTSD that could be triggered by a sudden loud sound without warning.
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eastbluecrewed · 5 months ago
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things you can't get back
aka i've been waiting so patiently to see kidd get his ass beat by shanks (affectionate)
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starwikia · 9 months ago
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suicide cw
look i have been in this area before mentally. it sucks and i wouldn’t wish this on anyone. but, and this is going to sound callous, but i don’t feel any sympathy for james somerton. even if i hope he’s like. not dead. But thats all the amount of goodwill im willing to give him. The more i think about this really, the more angry i am. 
ngl this entire situation is another example of how white people weaponize their mental illness to avoid consequences. Im seeing it in real time.
this man has a continuous habit of using self-harm as a get-out-of-jail-for-free card. in both of his apologies, he has worded his supposed attempts in ways that were clearly meant to guilt people who displayed his plagiarism and overall horrendous history of racism and misogyny. i say supposed because, while i’m not saying those are lies and this would he such a fucked up thing to lie about that i don’t want to think he has, unfortunately, it’s been proven again and again that his word can’t be trusted, as he’s known to lie to try get out of consequences. Hes a proven liar. him lying about this is actually the best case scenario, because no one should go through this entire situation, wouldnt wish this on anyone, but you can only do this so often before people stop sympathizing with you. is this callous? Yeah, but like. I’m actually fucking angry he cant straight up take no as an answer. that this is how he reacts realizing he cant be one of the Cool Kidz™️ on youtube anymore. he acts like he DESERVES a career, like its not a privilege hes lost due to his own actions.
He lied about apologizing and forgiving people, he lied about giving the money to hbomberguy to give to ppl he ripped off (yknow, instead of doing it himself), he lied about the jessie gender situation and rewrote the narrative to make it so he isnt the bad guy, and hes the victim all along actually!
you can’t tell me that supposed last message of his isn’t meant to be a 13 reasons why esq attempt to deflect the blame “look i’m going to kill myself and it’s all YOUR PEOPLES FAULT for not letting me achieve my DREAM of being filmmaker IN PEACE!!! I just wanted Nick’s (the guy who I have thrown under the bus again and again) portfolio up!! Im just being a good friend dont you all FEEL BAD” he refuses to take ANY ACCOUNTABILITY of any of his actions and he IS STILL trying to shove the blame over to other people again.
it’s also pretty ironic people are like “uhhh well hbomber’s fans harassed him!!!” like hbomber outright told people NOT to HARASS JAMES!!! ALSO acting as if james doesn’t have a very real documented history of STRAIGHT UP sending his fans to harass and threaten smaller creators, more notably women, trans, and bipoc creators. especially after he’s stolen typically very personal anecdotes so he could profit from them. so why can he do it but the second people are like “hey this guys an actual piece of shit.” and he can’t handle it suddenly people are trying to white knight his shit? like no he doesn’t get that. he doesn’t get that at all just because he couldn’t handle the consequences of his actions. 
what? were supposed to stay quiet about a man profiting off of other minorities because he wanted to be the spokesman for all gay people? people tried to solve this on a smaller, more private scales for YEARS and he kept doing it. it was clear that the giant public video was the ONLY way to get people to notice. HE WOULDVE GOTTEN AWAY WITH STEALING 87 FUCKING THOUSANDS WORTH OF DOLLARS. HE CANT HANDLE THE FACT HE CANT GET AWAY WITH IT. 
am i supposed to feel bad for the guy who basically threatened a trans woman with the police? i don’t care what anyone says, it’s so fucking obvious that he threatened jessie by implying he was getting the police involved in their conflict. what am i supposed to act like that didn’t happen? are we supposed to pretend like he didn’t glorify nazi’s and outright said that gay people made up a good chunk of the nazis? That he didnt say america joined ww2 bc they were jealous of the NAZIS. WHAT WOULD POSSESS YOU TO FUCKING SAY THAT. but then? He gives women (not even women most of the time, he misgenders nonbinary ppl constantly) shit for writing mlm. are we supposed to act like he doesn’t straight-up sees himself superior and better than people of color and steals their works to put himself on a pedestal? Are we supposed to act like he didnt spit on our elders by saying “only the boring gays survived aids” like man! Fuck you! He BLANTANTLY MAKES UP HISTORY TO PUT HIMSELF ON A PEDESTAL!! HE ACTIVELY TRIED TO REWRITE LGBT HISTORY TO SUIT HIS FUCKED UP NARRATIVES!
yes this sucks ! no one deserves this but no one should be making him a martyr. Thats what he fucking WANTS! He wants to be immortalized as a victim!! (again, supposedly, it was reported hes alive but its not confirmed).
The shit he got isnt near the amount of fucking callous behavior hes done again and again. Again, to drill this point, EVEN IF HE DIDNT CALL THE POLICE HE THREATENED A TRANS WOMAN INTO THINKING HE DID!!! The fact he tried to use a head injury to justify years of the outright ghoulish shit fucking astounds me. Why the fuck did anyone in his life thought it was a good idea to let him TRY to come back. in the end, he had options. he didn’t need to try to make a comeback. HE DIDNT NEED TO FUCKING LIE OR IGNORE THE SHIT HE WAS CALLED OUT ON the reality is, he wanted to come back thinking he could shove it under the rug, was told that no dude, you’re not allowed to be a youtuber anymore. you’re done. you need to move on and went full nuclear. it’s not on anyone’s hands but his own. HES BEEN DOING THIS TO HIMSELF!! But nah man we cant call his shit out bc hell may or may not kill himself. Fuck the other minorities who have the same issues but worse and sometimes BECAUSE of him. This is going to SUCKKKK so bad when other ppl, specifically white gays, are going to weaponize this shit to get away with their stuff.
#warning: do not read this post if you want me to be nice to james somerton. i am extremely mean in this post.#before anyone accuses me of shit i legit never contacted him myself or anyone involved. i am someone who witnessed this behavior repeatedly#again. i hope hes alive and well. the fact is him lying about this WOULD BE THE IDEAL SITUATION. BC NO ONE SHOULD GO THROUGH THAT. but.#he HAS to forever be the victim in his eyes. attempting doesnt automatically mean youre free of sin.#its just terrible to see that regardless whether or not he did do it#its very clear his attempts to run away from his consequences are working on some people#we need to acknowledge that if your shitty ex friend can weaponize a threat to kill themselves#so can this internet person after being called out for horrendous shit#like what was the alterative? what were people supposed to fucking do? be nice about it?#yeah as if poc and trans women arent historically given shit for being 'too mean' about wanting justice.#this isnt just the plagiarism this is the fact a white dude has been parading himself as THE speaker for the gays(tm) but has been using hi#gayness to shield himself from his misogyny racism transphobia and antisemitism#its very clear regardless this means that ppl r going to side with him and then give him benefit of doubt#if you cant handle the heat stay out of the fucking kitchen dude. this is the consequences of your fucking actions.#hes a disgusting person who cant handle being told no so hes going to drag everyone down with him#like. idk this entire situation is frustrating to me.#its also frustrating ppl trying to be moral abt it like 'see! i knew this was bad all along!' no you didnt. shut it.#for the record im like mainly talking abt twit watching those spineless uwu cutesy ppl basically saying hes done noting wrong#oh and also alt righters who are clearly weaponinizing this where u know they wouldnt give a shit if a right ytber did this.#james somerton#idk might delete this later its just. ugh...
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nattousan · 2 months ago
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I officially start as an apprentice at a tattoo shop today!! Yippee!!
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i've been drawin on myself and others since I was a kid so i guess this was only natural! I'm very excited and also Very terrified!
I can't help but think about the election coming up and how drastically different my future looks depending on who wins. Nobody's gonna want to get tattoos when they can't afford to live in the even Worse hypercapitalist hellscape trump would turn this country into should he get reelected.
How could i escape a potentially dictatorial country when I've been apprenticing and all my savings are gone? What would happen if he succeeds in banning my existence as a trans man and i'm forced to detransition in the eyes of the law? I really don't see anything being sacred when it comes to human rights for this monster and until we know once and for all that he's out, I will not be able to relax.
Alls I can do right now is make sure i VOTE. That's the one thing that will save us. Vote blue. Vote for the future and our potential to improve things under an imperfect but not outright fascist government. Overwhelm the numbers to where there can be no argument as to who won.
please. make sure to vote.
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mistykaru · 2 years ago
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i got stuff from the csp asset store and i wanted to play with it so this is a mess but i did have fun and i kinda dig the vibes
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serpentinegraphite · 7 months ago
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So, first off, this is not an attempt to kink shame (dubcon and noncon are great!) but I do keep seeing a thing in fics (I do NOT see this irl in kink spaces nearly as often) where like. A character will interrupt the flow of the scene to check consent
And I don't mean in an "are we still green?" Or "what's your color?" kind of way, but I mean. The author has tagged the fic and indicated via prose and/or author notes that they are doing their Due Diligence to make sure this fic is Righteously Consensual from top to bottom, No Question About It
And a character will ask for full sexual consent either directly or indirectly or renegotiate the boundaries of the kinks being practiced AFTER the sex acts have already begun.
Here's the thing: horny brain isn't great at making decisions! irl in kink spaces, there's often a lot of emphasis on negotiating BEFORE the scene begins, perhaps even with a space between negotiation and the scene if it's with a new/unfamiliar partner (maybe it's a few minutes while things are set up, maybe the partners negotiate a day or more in advance! It depends!), and not changing the parameters of the scene after someone is already horny or god forbid already in subspace.
Again, these are perfectly fine rules to break in fiction, when the author is aware of it (most characters are not going to be fully familiar with safe, sane, consensual practices and the traffic light system, nor would we want them to be!) but I'm increasingly finding fics where the author DOESN'T seem aware, which takes a normal fic (in-character, with reasonable but perhaps even somewhat dubious practices, which the author isn't emphasizing or preaching about) into Red Flag Territory (a character, OOC, yanking me out of the scene to behave like a PSA about consent instead of conforming to the horny tone of the scene, and perpetuating unsafe practices anyway)
If you are writing a master manipulator or someone who wants to have a gotcha, you totally said it was okay on a character they are trying to bone (which is well in the realm of non/dubcon) that's fine! This PSA is not aimed at you. But if you are trying to write someone who Cares Strongly About Consent, then perhaps be more aware of when is an appropriate time to escalate the situation (sexually speaking) or ask for consent!
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ghosttotheparty · 2 years ago
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something like bones and glass
warnings: homophobia; religious homophobia; f slur (several times); brief mention of pedophilia; past child abuse and neglect; violence/fighting; blood; rough sex also on AO3
Steve’s parents come home. Without warning.
Usually they call a few days in advance, just to let Steve know, probably because they assume Steve has friends over, has parties that he has to clean up after, but it’s been a while since that happened. It’s still nice to know when they’ll be home, just so he can prepare himself. So he knows what day he can hole up in his room or escape to Robin’s or Nancy’s.
But he hears their car pull into the driveway as he’s kissing Eddie against the wall by his bed, as Steve is pushing his hands under Eddie’s shirt to press into his skin, as Eddie is pulling his hair, and they both pull away at the same time to blink at each other in confusion.
“Nancy?” Eddie questions, still gripping Steve’s hair, and Steve shrugs.
“She didn’t say she was coming over.” He pecks Eddie quickly before letting go and going to the window. Eddie leans against the wall, watching him smooth his shirt down before he freezes, his eyes widening. “Shit— It’s my parents.”
Eddie’s stomach drops.
“What?”
He crosses the room, joining Steve at the window to see Cathrine and Walter Harrington, pulling suitcases out their car, talking across the roof of it.
“Fuck,” Eddie says, stepping away from the window in case they look up. “Uhm. I can— I can hide up here.”
“Your van in the driveway,” Steve says. His voice is almost distant, and he’s still looking out the window, his face fallen.
“You can say you borrowed it from someone,” Eddie suggests desperately. “Or— Or I can say I’m doing maintenance work? I know about, like, electrical work, we can say your A/C wasn’t working, or—“
“Eddie.”
“Or I— I know about cars, I can say I was working on your car and you invited me in for— for water or something, and—“
“Eddie.”
“And I mentioned music so you’re showing me your tapes, or, like—“
“Eddie.”
Eddie shuts up, staring at Steve with wide eyes, his heart pounding. The front door opens. Steve takes a shaky breath, his gaze unwavering from Eddie’s as something clatters downstairs.
“It’s fine,” Steve says quietly, firmly. “It’s…”
“Steve,” Eddie says softly.
“It’s fine.” Steve shakes his head. They can hear his parents’ voices downstairs, muffled by walls and doors and distance. “We… We’re friends. Right?”
Eddie exhales and nods.
“Come meet my parents,” Steve says with a little eyebrow quirk, and Eddie scoffs. Steve’s smile is fake. Eddie can tell.
“They’re gonna hate me,” he says quietly.
“I don’t care,” Steve says, his voice sharper, and Eddie’s eyes linger on the way his jaw is set, the way it clenches as he looks at Eddie intently. “I don’t— I don’t care what they think. You’re mine.”
Eddie stares at him, his eyes flickering to Steve’s lips.
“Fuck. Okay.”
“Okay?”
“Okay. Following your lead,” he says softly, and Steve smiles weakly, tugging him in by a necklace for a lingering kiss.
“Hey,” Eddie says as Steve is moving toward the door, and Steve pauses, his hand on the doorknob. “I love you.”
“I love you too,” Steve says earnestly.
Eddie follows Steve out the door, hesitating to rip off his battle jacket and throw it back into Steve’s room. He smooths his shirt down and rolls his eyes when he realises what he’s wearing (Judas Priest; there’s a hand holding a giant razor blade, and he wonders why he didn’t just wear a plain black shirt). The chains hanging from his ripped jeans rattle as he walks down the hall and down the stairs, and he tucks his necklaces under his shirt anxiously before he smooths his hair back. Steve pauses at the bottom of the stairs and looks up at him.
“What are you doing?” he asks quietly, glancing at his chest, at the absence of necklaces.
“Trying to look presentable,” Eddie whispers. Steve stares at him, smiling softly.
“You’re adorable.”
“Shut up.”
Cathrine and Walter’s voices get louder as they head into the living room, where they’re both standing with their suitcases. Eddie lingers by the door, pushing his hands into his pockets in tight fists.
“Hi,” Steve says like he’s asking. Eddie watches his shoulders tighten like he’s bracing himself.
Catherine’s hair barely moves even though she whips her head around to look at Steve. It’s tall and curly and fluffy looking but stiff with hairspray, and she’s wearing a grey pantsuit, her shoulders boxy, and her heels wobble on the carpet of the living room. Walter is also in a suit, his tie loosened, his hands in his pockets.
Eddie takes a deep breath, repressing the simmering anger in his chest as he looks at them, trying hard to keep a neutral, friendly expression.
Steve’s told him about them. About how they left him at home starting when he was nine, and how he was left with nannies and teenage babysitters before that. How they’d lose their shit if he spilled juice on the kitchen floor, if he stained or tore a shirt. How he raised his voice when he was eleven and saw the back of his father’s hand and then the floor, and the gold band around his finger haunted Steve’s dreams.
How his mother constantly, shamelessly, told him it was his fault she wasn’t young and beautiful anymore. That he was the reason his father wasn’t loving and caring, as though Steve ever has any say in his own existence.
“Whose van is in the driveway?” Walter asks sharply, sans greeting even though it’s been a few months since he’s seen Steve.
“Uhm.” Steve turns slightly toward Eddie, who steps further into the room, raising a hand and suddenly wishing his nails weren’t painted.
“That— That’s mine,” Eddie says lightly, putting on a smile.
Catherine’s eyes widen, and Walter stares, facing Eddie. The room is silent except the quiet ticking of the clock on the mantle.
“Steven,” Walter says in a careful, measured voice, his eyes trained on Eddie. “Why is there a killer in my living room?”
Eddie’s stomach drops further, his cheeks flaming, and he shoves his hand back in his pocket as Steve says sharply, “He’s not a killer.”
“Steven—“
“He’s not,” Steve snaps, and Eddie looks at him. “Those charges were proven wrong, and dropped, and Eddie’s one of my best friends.”
Eddie stares at Steve, at the firm set of his jaw like he’s just daring his father to argue.
The room is silent again, tense and awkward.
Tick. Tick. Tick.
“Walter,” Catherine says quietly, breaking the silence, placing a gentle hand on Walter’s shoulder as he and Steve stare each other down. “Let’s be polite to… Steven’s guest.”
Eddie blinks at her, trying ignore the pressure behind his eyes that always comes when he remembers that people actually believe that he’s a murderer. His hands are shaking.
“Your name is Eddie, right?” she says, sickly sweet and so kind it makes Eddie feel nauseous. It reminds him of the way kids in school used to feign interest in D&D, used to ask questions and prompt him to tell them excitedly about it just to make faces at their friends while he talked. Just to complain about how weird he is.
“Yes, ma’am,” Eddie says tightly.
“Would you like to stay for dinner, Eddie?” she says like she’s speaking to a child.
Eddie looks at Steve.
Who’s staring back, his gaze intense, his expression firm, and he nods slightly when Eddie silently asks him.
“Yes, ma’am,” he says again. “I’d like that. Thank you.”
She and Walter leave to take their luggage upstairs, and Steve tugs Eddie’s shirt, pulling him into a secluded corner in the living room, and their eyes lock. Steve looks like he wants to cry, and Eddie can hear the way his breath is trembling, and Steve’s lips are pursed to keep them from quivering.
“‘S okay,” Eddie says softly.
“I’m so sorry,” Steve says weakly, still clutching at Eddie’s shirt.
“No, stop,” Eddie tells him gently, moving closer. “It’s not your fault, Stevie.”
Steve inhales sharply, pressing his lips together.
“They are assholes,” Eddie says softly, reaching up to touch Steve’s cheek. “And that’s not your fault, you got it?”
Steve nods, swallowing.
“Yes.”
“Come here.”
He pulls Steve into a tight hug, pressing a kiss to his cheek.
“You’re doing so good, baby,” he murmurs as Steve’s arms wrap around him tightly. “And after dinner we can say my van broke down and you can take me home.” He pulls away to look into Steve’s eyes. “And you can stick with Wayne and me for a while. How’s that sound?”
Steve nods, his mouth twisting, and Eddie’s heart aches because Steve is trying not to cry.
“I love you so much,” Eddie whispers. “‘S gonna be okay.”
“I hate them so much, Eddie,” Steve says. His voice wavers.
“I know, baby.” Eddie kisses him. “I know. But after this we’ll go home. And we can get high if you want.”
“Will you fuck me?” Steve asks in a small voice.
“Absolutely.”
“Cool.” He exhales and pulls Eddie into a kiss. “Love you.”
“Love you too, sweetheart.” Eddie kisses him again, pulling back when a door shuts upstairs, but Steve tugs him close, kissing him chastely before he carefully pulls Eddie’s necklaces out of his shirt.
“Don’t hide.”
Eddie melts a little bit.
Eddie fidgets with his necklaces while Catherine scours the fridge and freezer for a dinner to her liking, complaining about how unhealthy pizzas are and just sighing when Steve points out that he babysits children. She settles on a lasagna that she finds buried in the freezer and some lettuce. Without dressing. (Eddie thought rich people were supposed to eat better.)
Steve sits next to him at the dinner table. Eddie’s never seen plates on this table. It’s usually filled with cards or dice or maps and drawings and crayons. Steve stares sullenly at his plate, poking at his food with his fork as Eddie chats with his mom as best he can. He can still hear the ticking from the clock in the living room as they talk.
He tells her that he met Steve through Dustin, that he knew Steve at school because everyone loved him, and then he found out everyone loves him even outside of school. That the kids he babysits practically worship him. He catches Steve fighting a smile as he speaks.
The conversation dies down after a while. Under the table, Steve sets a hand on Eddie’s thigh and squeezes tightly. He’s shaking.
Eddie subtly reaches under the table and squeezes his hand, rubbing the back of it gently.
“Mr Harrington,” he says politely when they let go of each other. “Steve said you had work in, uhm, was it San Francisco?”
“That’s right,” Walter says dryly.
“I’ve never been,” Eddie says, trying desperately to keep his voice light. “How is it?”
Walter sighs, taking a bite.
“Not as nice as it used to be.”
“Oh,” Eddie says, taking the opportunity for a real conversation. “Why’s that?”
“Not as clean,” he says. Eddie hates his voice. So pompous and dry like the world bores him. “Posters and banners everywhere, all these fags walks around the streets holding hands. Disgusting.”
Eddie’s blood runs cold. In his peripheral vision he sees Steve tighten.
“Oh.” He twists his fork, seeing Steve’s hand grip the table cloth tightly. “Sounds real different from Hawkins.”
“Sure is.”
Eddie shifts so he can press his foot to Steve’s because he can’t lean over and kiss him. There’s a long stretch of silence. Eddie counts seventeen ticks of the clock before he speaks again, the silence unbearable.
“Mrs Harrington, Steve mentioned that you collect pottery.”
When he mentioned it, he said he wanted to smash all of it. Eddie doesn’t say that.
“I do,” she says brightly. “I started collecting when I was nineteen, after I married Walter—“
“Why is it disgusting?” Steve interrupts abruptly, looking across the table at his father. Catherine falls silent, staring at him. Eddie says his name softly.
“I’m sorry?” Walter says, lowering his fork.
“The fags,” Steve says coldly. “If they’re just holding hands. What’s the problem?”
Walter stares at Steve, a challenge in his eyes, but Steve keeps his ground, staring back, unblinking.
“You know why.”
“No. I don’t.” Steve lifts his chin defiantly. Eddie wants to marry him. “Tell me.”
“It’s not right.”
“Why?” Steve says, but it’s hardly a question. He almost growls. Eddie shifts in his seat.
“Men are supposed to be with women,” Walter says, his voice measured like he’s lecturing Steve. Eddie can hear the way Steve is breathing, can see his fist trembling as it grips the table cloth. Eddie kind of hopes it rips. “Homosexuals— They— They go against God’s word.”
A small part of Eddie is happy to see him get flustered.
“Right,” Steve breathes. “God’s word.” He’s nodding, his jaw tensed the way it does when he’s particularly mad. It’s hot. Eddie sets his fork down. “Because God always wants the best, right?”
Walter just stares. Catherine’s hands are in her lap.
“That’s why priests rape little boys when they go in for Sunday school, right? Because they know God’s word.” Eddie looks at him, taking a deep breath. “That’s why you married an eighteen year old when you were twenty seven.”
Eddie’s eyes widen, and he looks at Catherine, who clears her throat delicately and wipes her lips with her napkin even though there’s nothing there. Walter’s face turns red.
“God also says don’t get drunk,” Steve continues, his voice strong. “And we all know you don’t have an issue with that.”
“Steven,” Catherine says firmly, but Steve doesn’t spare her a glance. The air feels like it’s tightening, like they’re all holding their breaths.
“So what’s the problem with fags?” Steve asks, his cheeks red. “Why do you hate them so much? You’re not better than them.”
“Why are you so defensive—”
“Because I am one.”
Steve is yelling.
Steve never yells, not like this. He yells to be heard over rambunctious bickering and laughter, he yells to be heard across the trailer or the house. He doesn’t yell out of anger. But he is now.
The rooms falls silent. Eddie looks from Steve to his parents, to their wide eyes, and he slowly reaches for the knife next to his plate. He grips it in his hand, his muscles tense the way they were when he was fighting the demobats with Dustin. Ready to move at any given second, like his veins are stiff with adrenaline.
“What are you saying?” Walter says coldly, quietly.
Steve scoffs, humourless.
“I think that was pretty clear.”
“Steven—“ Catherine tries to say, but Steve interrupts.
“But you want me to be clearer? I can be clearer.” He pushes his plate away, toward his dad, and leans over in emphasis. “I like men. And I’ve known for years, and I never told you because I knew you’d try to beat it out of me, but you can’t do that anymore.”
Walter throws his fork onto his plate with a clatter, his mouth twisting, and Steve just grins.
“I can be more specific,” he says in a low voice. He leans back, moving his arm to run his fingers through Eddie’s hair more gently than Eddie thought possible at a time like this. “This is my boyfriend, Eddie,” Steve says. Eddie smiles at him. “And I love him more than life itself, and I love when he holds my hand, and when he kisses me, and—”
Walter interrupts by moving out of his seat, the chair scraping loudly on the floor, his face bright red, as though anything Steve’s said is scandalous. Steve seems to have the same thought, pulling his hand away from Eddie and standing too, his eyes following Walter as he moves away from the table.
“I can tell you more,” he says loudly, defiantly. Eddie scoots his chair back, watching raptly, just in case. “I love it when he fucks me.”
Catherine gasps, and a laugh bursts out of Eddie as he watches Walter’s face redden even more.
“And he fucks me hard,” Steve continues, ignoring his mother as she says his name weakly and begins to cry. “And I fucking love it. And I bet that pisses you off even more, doesn’t it.”
He’s breathing hard, and his whole body is trembling, and Eddie feels prouder than he’s ever felt in his life.
“That I’m the one taking it,” Steve says, quieter as Walter stares at him. “You always wanted me to be a man, but I love it when my boyfriend makes me his bitch.”
Heat pools in Eddie’s stomach. He slides his tongue across his lips, wanting to pin Steve to the wall and kiss his breath away.
“And aren’t you angry,” Steve breathes. “That you don’t have another son to fix the Harrington name.” He’s moving closer to Walter, and Eddie watches carefully. Walter’s hands are shaking, his chest rising and falling with each breath that rattles around in the quiet room. “Because you’re an only child,” Steve says thoughtfully, like it’s a new discovery. “And you only had a faggot,” he adds quietly, close enough to press two fingertips into Walter’s chest as he whispers, “Harringtons end with me.”
The air snaps.
Catherine screams when Walter’s fist hits Steve’s face, and Eddie stands from his chair, his vision red, moving quickly as Catherine cries Walter’s name. Walter is trying to hit Steve again, and Eddie grabs the back of his jacket, jerking him off and holding him back as Steve takes a breath.
His eyes are shining in a way Eddie’s never seen before, with malice and rage and twenty years of anger boiling and bubbling out of him. His cheek is already blooming red, and Eddie can see the subtle mark of Walter’s wedding band. Eddie jerks his jacket again, holding him in place.
“I’m not fourteen anymore, Dad,” Steve says evenly.
The crack of his fist on Walter’s face echoes around the room, and Eddie finally drops the jacket, but not before shoving Walter against the wall hard to disorient him. He steps away as Steve punches him again, watching.
Catherine is yelling at them to stop, her voice shrill and high, but Eddie just… watches.
He’s heard Dustin and the others tease Steve for not winning fights. Losing the fight with Jonathan Byers, the fight with Billy Hargrove. But he’s also heard them all praise Steve for beating demodogs with a baseball bat. And he’s seen Steve throw a demobat into the ground by gripping its serrated tail, seen him step on its wing and rip it right in half before flinging its body away and spitting its blood on the ground. And Eddie’s known, for as long as he’s known this Steve Harrington, that he pulls his punches.
But he isn’t tonight.
Walter’s face and Steve’s hands are painted red with blood, and the sound of them both yelling and Cathrine sobbing and the sound of bone and blood are echoing around the kitchen until Walter is dropping to the floor.
Steve is gripping the front of his blood stained shirt, hitting him and hitting him and hitting him, and Eddie startles at the sound of the front door breaking in, blinking hard and realising that the room is lit up by red and blue flashing lights, that Catherine isn’t in the room.
He steps forward to pull Steve away, his vision focused on Steve as shouts fill the room, but Steve shoves him back and Eddie gets a glimpse of his face.
His top lip is split, bleeding, and his cheek is darkly bruised, and he’s crying.
Tears mix with his blood as they slide down his cheeks, and Eddie knows it must hurt as a tear hits his lip, and even though Steve must not be able to see well, he isn’t stopping. Eddie desperately shouts his name, wrapping his arms around him and pulling him away from Walter, who falls onto the floor, weakly saying something about Steve being a bastard. Catherine is sobbing in the doorway as cops pull Walter off the ground, and Eddie holds Steve back.
Steve is sobbing too, and Eddie’s whole body hurts. He’s saying Steve’s name, trying to get him to look at Eddie, wants to prompt him to breathe in all the way, but Steve won’t look at him, his arms straining against Eddie’s grip. He’s still yelling.
The cops push Walter toward the door as one of them, Powell, moves toward Eddie. Eddie recognises him. He was there when Eddie came back, when Hopper came back. He arrested Eddie once when Eddie was fifteen, but he didn’t seem to hold a grudge was Hopper and Joyce Byers filled him on the shitshow that been going on in Hawkins for the past few years.
Powell is staring, wide-eyed, at them, his mouth hanging ajar with an unspoken question.
“He threw the first punch,” Eddie says, gesturing to Walter’s wriggling body as he’s led outside, his voice shaking.
Walter is yelling at Steve, even though he can’t see him. Calling him a bastard, and a faggot. Yelling that Steve isn’t his son.
As soon as he’s out the door, Steve’s body relaxes, and Eddie pulls him close, tugging him into a hug. He’s breathing hard, and shaking so hard that Eddie can feel it even though Steve’s fists are gripping his shirt tightly. The cop looks at them, watching, but Eddie doesn’t care. Let him see.
Eddie holds his face gently when Steve’s crying slows, and he watches the flashing police lights reflect in his glistening eyes and his tears. Eddie wipes a drop of blood from his lip, nodding when Steve’s chin quivers.
“You’re okay,” Eddie murmurs. His hands are shaking too. Steve takes a deep, trembling breath, his eyes flicking back and forth between Eddie’s.
“My ear’s ringing.”
Eddie’s eyes widen, and he reaches up to Steve’s right ear, touching it gently. There’s some blood in his hair above it, and anger flashes in Eddie’s chest. He wants to go outside and beat Walter some more, regardless of the cops, regardless of his already garbage reputation. But he doesn’t. Because Steve is clutching to his shirt, and he’s crying.
“Can you hear me still?”
Steve nods, squeezing his eyes shut tightly. Eddie pulls him into another hug, moving so his mouth is above his right ear, and he knows he’s getting blood on his face, but he doesn’t care.
“‘S gonna be okay,” he says softly. “I got you, sweetheart, you’re alright.”
Eddie closes his eyes, and they sway, and they can still hear the distant, unintelligible shouting of Walter outside. Powell waits next to them patiently until they part slowly. Steve is sniffling, and Eddie wipes his face, under his eyes, under his nose, wipes away the blood on his lip.
“Steve,” Powell says gently. “You gotta tell me what happened.”
Steve takes another deep breath, swallowing thickly before he looks at Powell, setting his shoulders and jaw again.
“I’m queer,” he says firmly. Powell doesn’t react, just looks at him. “I told him.”
“He hit you first?” Powell asks, reiterating what Eddie said earlier. Steve nods.
“I…” He hesitates, reaches down to take Eddie’s hand, and Eddie laces their fingers, squeezes tightly. “I provoked him. Taunted him.”
Powell pauses, looking out the window to see the cars outside, and he slides his tongue over his teeth, seething.
“Wait here a minute.”
Eddie nods, and Steve leans against him as Powell leaves. Eddie wraps his arms around Steve tightly, pulling him close.
“God, you did so good, Stevie,” he murmurs in his good ear. “‘M so proud of you, baby.”
“Eddie,” Steve says weakly. His voice is rough. Eddie kisses his forehead gently.
“I know, baby,” he says just loud enough that Steve can hear him. “But it’s done, okay?” he says. He looks into Steve’s eyes. “You’re done with him.”
Steve exhales, closing his eyes.
Eddie shifts, pulling to guide him to the table, but Steve tugs at his shirt, opening his eyes and leaving a hard, lingering kiss on Eddie’s lips. Eddie closes his eyes, holding Steve until he pulls away, and when Steve looks at him blearily, he lets out a soft laugh that seems out of place.
“I got blood on you,” he says quietly. Eddie scoffs.
“I’ve had worse bodily fluids of yours on me.”
“Gross,” Steve says, grinning, and he winces when it stretches his lip. There’s blood in his teeth.
“C’mere,” Eddie says, pulling him over and pushing him to lean against the table between Eddie’s and Catherine’s plates before he goes to get a paper towel. Steve snatches it from his hand as he stands between his legs, and Eddie lets out a small indignant noise, but Steve shushes him, reaching up to clean blood off his lip. Eddie waits, holding Steve’s hips.
“Love you so much,” Eddie murmurs.
“Love you too.”
“Is your ear still ringing?”
Steve shakes his head before he pauses, tilting his head and closing his eyes as his brows furrow. Eddie takes the paper towel.
“Little bit. Not as bad. I think it’s fine.”
Eddie gently, tenderly wiping blood off Steve’s lips before he presses it to the split, watching Steve wince slightly. He can feel Steve’s heartbeat against his fingertip. It’s still fast.
“Deep breath,” Eddie says softly. Steve closes his eyes, inhaling deeply. “I got you, baby.”
Steve’s hand finds his waist, holding him tightly as he exhales.
Eddie leans in and kisses his forehead softly, feeling Steve fall forward against him. He pushes his fingers through Steve’s hair, kissing across his forehead, kissing his temple, tilting his head to kiss Steve’s ear tenderly. He whispers to him quietly.
When Powell comes back in, Eddie has to nudge Steve’s cheek gently to make him open his eyes, and Steve turns his face slightly. Eddie pulls away the paper towel. His lip doesn’t seem to be bleeding anymore.
“He’s being held overnight,” Powell says, pushing a notebook into his pocket. “Paying bail, should be released around noon tomorrow.”
Steve nods.
“Your mother’s going with him,” Powell continues gently, like he can see the anguish it causes in Steve’s eyes. “She’s staying at a friend’s tonight.”
“Okay.”
Powell hesitates, looking from Steve to Eddie.
“You have a place to stay?” he asks. Eddie guesses it’s unspoken knowledge that Steve can’t stay here.
“Yes.”
Eddie knows Steve knows he can stay at the trailer for as long as he has to. And Claudia Henderson’s offered her guest room, as well as Joyce and Hopper. Robin’s offered her bedroom floor. Nancy’s offered her basement.
“And you?” Powell asks, looking at Eddie. Eddie starts for a moment, blinking at him blankly before he nods.
“Uh, yeah.”
“Okay.”
Powell hesitates for a moment longer before he looks at Steve, his eyes shining earnestly.
“He shows up again,” he says carefully. “At your work, or wherever you stay, if he threatens you… Or tries anything.” He points at Steve, so serious the air feels tense again. “You come to the station. You tell me, and if I’m not there you tell Flo, and she’ll find me, okay?”
Steve nods, staring at him, biting his lip.
“I’ll take care of it.”
“Okay,” Steve says quietly.
“And if you need another place to stay,” Powell adds. “Let me know. My wife and I have a spare bedroom.”
Steve smiles weakly.
“Okay.”
“You too,” Powell says to Eddie. “Got it?”
“Yes, sir,” Eddie says, smiling softly.
Powell claps Steve on his back gently.
“You’re a good kid, Steve.”
Steve pulls Eddie closer when he leaves, and Eddie moves between his legs again, touching his hair gently. The blood above his ear is dry.
They stand in silence as they listen to the cars leave the driveway. Three cars. After a moment the red and blue lights are gone, and Eddie exhales.
Eddie gazes at the bruise on his cheek. His lip is a little swollen, crusted with dry blood. After a moment, Steve leans forward, resting his head on Eddie’s sternum, and Eddie runs a hand over his hair gently.
“What do you need?” Eddie asks quietly. “You wanna shower? Go to bed?”
Steve lifts his head and looks up at him.
“I need you to fuck me.”
Eddie stares at him, looks back and forth between his eyes, watching them shine earnestly, and he stands up straight, tossing away the paper towel.
“Turn around.”
Steve grins and stands up, turning around to face the table, already tugging his shirt off and tossing it across the room. Eddie steps up behind him, tugging Steve’s hair to make him tilt his head before he presses kisses along the side of his neck.
Steve hums breathlessly when Eddie pushes him so the fronts of his legs press to the table, and Eddie reaches around him to unbutton and unzip his jeans.
“Colour?” he asks roughly, pausing as he grips the waistband of the jeans, and Steve whines, his head falling back to Eddie’s shoulder.
“Green, baby, please.”
Eddie grins, shoving Steve’s jeans and boxers down his legs and pushing at his back so he bends over the table.
“Spread ‘em,” he says, kicking at Steve’s foot, and Steve spreads his legs, groaning softly and turning his head so his cheek presses to the table. “Pretty boy.”
“Eddie,” Steve says weakly. “I love you.”
“I love you too, baby,” Eddie murmurs. He leans over and kisses his back, down his spine. “So fucking much.”
He kneels on the ground behind him, running his hands over Steve’s ass and his thighs, squeezing and kneading before he leans in to bite at him for a moment before he licks across his hole, holding him tightly.
Steve whines loudly, pushing his ass back toward Eddie, who snickers quietly before eating him out in earnest, licking and sucking and nibbling as he listens to the sweet sounds Steve makes above him.
Steve is groaning and whimpering and whining, and Eddie has to pull away to laugh when a plate falls from the table and shatters on the ground.
“Fuck, sorry,” Steve says, laughing, and Eddie stands to find him gripping the table cloth tightly.
“‘S okay,” Eddie says, breathing hard, tugging Steve’s hair so he stands up again, and Steve releases the table cloth. Eddie wraps his arms around him, kissing his neck. There’s some blood on the table cloth, and Steve is drooling, and Eddie smiles. “Love it when you get all wild. My perfect boy.” He lifts a hand, presses two fingers to Steve’s lips, and Steve whimpers, opening his mouth.
Eddie bites his neck as Steve’s tongue swirls around his fingers, pressing desperate kisses around the back of his neck until he reaches his right ear.
“You have any idea how amazing I think you are?” Eddie asks softly. Steve moans, his head falling back as Eddie pushes his fingers deeper into his mouth, pressing into the pooling spit under his tongue. “Love of my fuckin’ life.”
Steve reaches up and pushes his fingers into Eddie’s hair as soft noises escape his throat.
“You feel good, sweetheart?” Eddie asks. Steve moans quietly, nodding. “You wanna feel better?”
Steve smiles around his fingers, giggling softly, and he tugs Eddie’s hair as he nods.
Eddie pulls his hand away from Steve’s mouth and takes a moment to look at Steve’s spit dripping over his fingers before he reaches down to press a finger inside him.
“Fuck,” Steve groans loudly. Eddie beams.
“Yeah?”
“Fuck, Eddie, I need— Gimme more, baby, please—”
“I’ll take care of you, Stevie,” Eddie murmurs into his ear. “I got you.”
“Feel so good, Eddie.”
Eddie smiles again, biting at his neck, fingering him open as he whispers to him. Tells him how pretty is. He gets three fingers in before Steve finally whines, tugging sharply at his hair.
“Eddie,” he gasps. “Please, please, I—”
“Bend over.”
Steve grins again, leaning to lay on the table again, resting his head so his right ear is up.
Eddie kisses his back before he steps back, unbuckling his belt as he moves to the the counter, noisily opening and shutting cabinets until he finds what he’s looking for.
Steve whines Eddie’s name, looking up at him, and Eddie pulls his belt from the loops of his jeans, shaking the bottle of olive oil at him with raised eyebrows. Steve snorts loudly and lets out a childish, juvenile laugh, grinning and hiding his face in his arms.
Eddie’s always hated this olive oil. It’s Catherine’s, expensive and fancy and ordered from Italy, always hidden away in her special occasions only cabinet. But Eddie thinks this counts as a special occasion, because the man of his dreams is bent over the dining table and Eddie doesn’t want to go all the way upstairs for lube.
Steve’s fists grip the tablecloth when Eddie pushes in, the same way he clutches at the sheets when they’re in bed. The cloth comes up, and a glass falls the floor, shattering, and Eddie laughs again, setting the olive oil down.
“You’re makin’ a mess, baby.”
Steve just lets out a long groan.
Eddie gazes down at him, at the scars that cover his back and backs of his arms, at the mess of his hair. He slides a hand over his back, smearing oil over his skin.
“How do you want it?” he asks breathlessly.
“Hard.”
“Got it. Hold on.”
Steve giggles, gripping the tablecloth, and he lets out a sharp gasp as Eddie snaps his hips into him.
Eddie loves when Steve gets like this. All loose and relaxed, going with every movement Eddie makes. Unfiltered and loud, groaning and whining and almost screaming when Eddie really gets going, his hand to the small of his back. He’s always like this, even when Eddie fucks him softly and kindly like the first time they had sex (or made love, as Eddie put it dramatically once they’d finished. Steve shoved him away and then promptly pulled him closer to tuck his face into his neck.), tangled in blankets in the back of Eddie’s van, breathing into each other’s mouths, whispering and giggling.
Another plate falls from the table.
Eddie is grinning down at him, watching, listening as he swears and moans.
“Eddie,” Steve wails. Tears are sliding down his face, staining the tablecloth.
“Yeah, baby,” Eddie says roughly, his hands gripping Steve’s hips tightly. “What do you need?”
“Fuck, spit on me,” Steve whimpers. “Make me yours, Eddie, please.”
Eddie exhales, running a hand down his spine tenderly. (That night in the van, Eddie also learned, to his delight, that Steve is even kinkier than he is. It’s fun.)
“You are mine,” he says gently. “Always.”
He fucks into him three more times as he gathers spit in his mouth, and then he pauses, letting it drip over Steve’s back. Steve lets out a soft yes, almost hissing it, and Eddie smiles down at him, rubbing the spit into his skin as he moves again.
“Eddie, right there—”
“I got you, baby, I know.”
“Eddie, please, Eddie, EddieEddieEddie—”
He presses his hand against Steve’s back hard, fucking him harder, faster, until Steve is sobbing, until the two remaining plates and the bottle of olive oil fall to the ground and shatter to pieces. Eddie laughs again.
Steve comes on the table cloth. Eddie lifts him up to wrap his arms around him when they finish, and Steve’s head falls back against Eddie’s shoulder. Eddie doesn’t pull out, just holds Steve close and pulls his necklaces around to hang backwards so they aren’t pressing into Steve’s bare skin.
“You okay?” he asks softly after pressing a soft kiss to his earlobe. Steve exhales.
“Holy fuck.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah,” Steve breathes. He presses his hand over Eddie’s forearm, slides it down to lace their fingers.
“Look at that, baby,” Eddie says softly, nudging him so look at the table. Steve’s eyes flutter open, finding it. A mostly empty glass, rolling on its side in spilled water, the pale blue tablecloth uneven and folded and stained with blood and oil and come. “That’s all you.”
Steve exhales, resting his head on Eddie’s shoulder.
“I’d say you helped.”
Eddie snickers into the side of Steve’s neck, his arms tightening, and Steve moans softly.
“Smartass.”
“You love me.”
“I do.”
Steve sighs. Eddie can feels his pulse on his lips. It’s slower.
“What now?” he asks quietly.
“Shower,” Steve says, squeezing his hand. “And pack.”
Eddie hums and kisses his neck tenderly.
“And then we’ll go home,” he murmurs.
Steve smiles.
“Then we’ll go home.”
They shower slowly, carefully washing each other’s hair and bodies, washing away blood and sweat and come in the hot, running water. Steve’s shampoo smells warm, like cinnamon and other spices Eddie’s never been able to afford to keep in his cabinets. (Nutmeg? Allspice? Eddie doesn’t even know what he would use them for.) After they dry off and dress, Eddie stuffs the shampoo, along with his conditioner and body soap, into a plastic bag to take with them. Steve adds two cans of Farah Fawcett hairspray.
Eddie helps him sort through his clothes, pick what to take and what to leave behind. He finds one of his own sweaters in Steve’s closet as Steve is stuffing a bag with underwear and socks, and he giggles to himself before throwing it at Steve. Steve’s cheeks flush pink, and he wordlessly stuffs it into the bag.
Steve packs most of his shirts, except a few he says his mother picked out, and most of his jeans. Eddie gets a garbage bag for the clothes Steve doesn’t want anymore, and he laughs as makes his way through the kitchen, looking at the mess he and Steve made and next behind. They aren’t going to clean it up. Just because.
Steve’s room is pathetically empty by the time they finish packing. It was already pathetically empty before, if Eddie’s honest. No framed pictures, no keepsakes. No stuffed animals or childhood toys. Steve’s bags, a duffel bag and a backpack, are both stuffed with clothes and soap, with a bottle of cologne and a copy of the Hobbit that he tried to hide from Eddie.
Eddie finds it, of course. And looks up at Steve with a beaming grin, even as Steve rubs the back of his neck, blushing bright red.
“You love it so much, I just…”
Eddie crosses the room and wraps his arms around his neck, swaying like they’re dancing.
“Do you like it?”
“I’m trying to.”
“You don’t have to like it,” Eddie says, grinning. Steve wraps his arms around Eddie’s waist, pulling him close. “It’s fine if you don’t.”
“I know,” Steve says shyly, swaying with him again. “Think I’m just a slow reader.”
“‘S okay, baby,” Eddie says softly. “You don’t have a due date or anything.”
“Thank God.”
They go to bed in the Harrington house for the last time.
Eddie wakes up to Steve’s lips pressing down his neck, and he smiles at the ceiling without opening his eyes, tilting his head back to give him room. He hums softly.
“Whassa time?” Eddie mumbles weakly, reaching blindly to find Steve’s hair.
“Six twenty-seven,” Steve says before he licks a slow line up his neck. Eddie groans.
“Forgot I’m in love with a morning person.”
“‘S sweet,” Steve says lightly. “Just relax, baby.”
Eddie sighs, tugging at his hair again, but his hand falls when Steve moves, tossing the blanket up so he can duck under it. Eddie shivers at the gust of cold morning air that hits his body, and then he shivers again as Steve tugs at the waistband of his boxers.
“I’ll make you coffee,” Eddie says breathlessly when Steve comes back up from under the blanket, cracking his eyes open to find Steve grinning brightly at him. His split lip doesn’t bleed even as he smile. The bruise on his face is colourful, reddish purple and blue, and somehow achingly beautiful even as it makes Eddie’s chest hurt like he’s been shot.
“I’d like that,” Steve says softly.
They get out of bed slowly, lazily, and Eddie tugs on one of Steve’s hoodies as he yawns.
Steve always looks beautiful in the morning light. Even in gray mornings like this, he seems to glow brighter than the sun.
Steve goes to the bathroom while Eddie goes down to make the coffee. He finds Steve’s favourite mug in a cabinet, the cute blue one, and he leans against the counter as he waits on the coffee, looking at the dining table and smiling to himself.
He’s shaken out of his thoughts by a car pulling into the driveway.
He blinks, tilting his head to listen like he can’t tell where it’s coming from, and he turns around, leaning to look out the window to see Catherine.
Anger flares in his chest, and he’s swinging the front door open before she’s even out of the car, careless to the fact that he’s in his boxers.
“What the fuck are you doing here?” he asks sharply as she approaches the door. Her eyes skim over him, her hands folded in front of her. Her hair isn’t as nice as it was yesterday, and Eddie can see traces of her makeup that ran down her cheeks last night.
“It’s my house,” she says primly.
“Well we’re not gone yet,” Eddie snaps. “Come back in a few hours.”
She takes a breath, opening her mouth to speak, but Steve’s voice interrupts her.
“Eddie?” Eddie turns sharply, looking to see Steve coming down the stairs, and Steve’s face hardens when he sees his mother on the front step. “Oh.”
“We don’t have to deal with this, baby,” Eddie says quickly. “Just get your stuff, we can go.”
Steve pauses, staring at Catherine coldly, his mouth twisting thoughtfully before he says, “No. Let’s have coffee,” in a voice that’s far too calm, too light.
He continues down the stairs and turns wordlessly into the kitchen, and Catherine steps past Eddie.
Eddie shuts the door, his stomach knotting, and he follows them to the kitchen. Steve is sipping from the mug, leaning against the counter, and Eddie joins him, watching with a suppressed smile as Catherine looks at the table.
“What do you want?” Steve asks coldly.
“What happened to the table?”
“Eddie fucked me on it. What do you want?”
Catherine’s face turns red, and she looks away from the table, clearing her throat delicately.
“I wanted to talk.”
“So talk,” Steve says dryly, sipping the coffee. He’s still staring at her, almost seething.
Catherine hesitates, taking a breath and looking at the floor, eyeing the broken bottle of olive oil, but she doesn’t say anything about it.
“I know,” she says slowly. “That what happened last night is not… reversible.”
She looks up at Steve.
“But you are still our son,” she says kindly, and Eddie scoffs. “And I want you to know that you still have a home here.”
“No.”
She blinks.
“No?”
Steve inhales deeply, biting his lip, and he carefully holds the mug out to Eddie, who takes it as Steve crosses his arms.
“I have never had a home here,” Steve says calmly, “Mom.”
“Steven,” she says softly. Like it hurts.
He shakes his head, pressing his lips together.
“I’ve never felt…” He pauses, swallowing. “I’ve never felt safe here. Or— Or loved. I’ve never felt fucking— at home here. This has always been just— just a sad empty… lonely house for the sad empty lonely little boy.”
Eddie looks at the floor, biting his lip as he focusses on the heat of the mug in his hands.
“I know you don’t mean that, darling,” Catherine says softly.
“You don’t know anything about me,” Steve says coldly.
“Steven, of course I do—”
“No, you don’t,” Steve shouts. Eddie flinches, and he turns to set the mug on the counter. “No, you don’t,” Steve repeats, breathing hard. “You don’t know shit about me. You know my name because you picked it, but you don’t know who I am.”
“Steven—“
“You left me,” Steve interrupts, his voice shaking. “You— You left me. Here. With— With teenagers, while you went off on holidays and fucking business trips, you left me here, while I was trying to grow up, and then I had to figure out to be a grown up, all by myself because you weren’t here.”
His lip is quivering, and he steadies it between his teeth.
“You don’t know me,” he says again, quietly.
“Steven, you’re my son,” she says softly.
“I’m half deaf.”
She blinks.
“What?”
“One of my ears,” Steve says slowly, “has no hearing.” He stands up straight, off the counter, and gestures to his ears with a hand. “Can you tell which ear it is?”
She stares, wide-eyed.
“Steven—“
“Can you tell me,” he says shakily, “when my hearing started going?”
Silence.
“Because I can tell you,” Steve whispers. “The fucking day.”
He moves closer, his breathing unsteady.
“July sixteenth,” he says quietly. “Nineteen eighty.”
Eddie grips the counter, biting his lip as he watches. Catherine’s are welling with tears, but Steve doesn’t seem to even notice.
“When your husband gave me a concussion,” he continues, whispering. “And I looked up to see you leave the room, and shut the door behind yourself.”
Eddie’s eyes jump to Catherine, his vision red. Her lip is quivering. Eddie doesn’t care.
“I have had four concussions in my life,” Steve says, holding up four fingers before he lowers two of them. “Two of them… were from your husband. And both times, you left.”
“Steven,” she says weakly, but Steve snaps.
“You left,” he shouts. Catherine flinches. Eddie doesn’t. “You picked him,” he says, pointing toward the door. “Twenty fucking years, and you picked him, again, and again, and again.” He chokes, and his voice breaks. “My whole life,” he says weakly. “You picked a man, who never loved you, over your son.”
Eddie’s eyes burn, and he looks at the ground, swallowing thickly.
“And last night you picked him again,” Steve says.
Catherine stares at him. A tear slides down her cheek.
“So no,” Steve says after taking a breath. “You don’t know me, and you don’t get to. This is all you get.”
He stares her down for a moment, and Eddie blinks his tears back, watching proudly.
“Fuck you,” Steve says softly. “And fuck him, and fuck this house. I’m fucking done.”
“Steven, please,” she begs quietly. “You don’t have to come here, or— or see him, but I still want to be… a part of your life, darling, I—”
“You’re not better than him,” Steve yells, crying. “You let him, you let him do everything he did to me.” He’s panting, and Eddie’s chest tightens. He stands up straight. “You made me hate myself before I was old enough to understand why you hate me.”
“I don’t hate you, darling—”
“Well you don’t fucking love me either,” Steve yells. He stops short, blinking like he’s realises it just as he says it, and Eddie wants to pull him into a hug, but he also wants to find Nancy’s gun and shoot both his parents for ever making Steve feel like this. “Even if you think you do,” he says softly. “Whatever kind of love you think you have for me. I don’t want it.”
He stares for a moment longer before wiping his face hard and shaking his head.
And he leaves.
Eddie holds his breath, listening as Steve storms up the stairs, listening as Catherine cries quietly, a hand pressed over her mouth. Steve comes back down after a few moments with his bags, and he pauses in the doorway, looking at Eddie, who looks up.
“Go to the van, I’ll be there in a minute, babe.”
Steve looks at him for a moment before he steps close and tugs him by his shirt into a kiss, sliding his tongue into Eddie mouth and holding him close desperately. Eddie pushes his fingers into Steve’s hair, closing his eyes and exhaling, tasting the coffee on Steve’s breath.
They’re both breathless when they part, and Steve looks into Eddie’s eyes. Eddie nods, touching his cheek.
Steve goes outside.
The door shuts behind him, and Eddie hears the van door open and shut. And then he just hears Catherine’s soft breaths. And the ticking of the clock in the living room.
He leans against the counter, looking at the floor, hesitating before he looks up at her.
“He is… the best thing that’s ever happened to me,” Eddie says slowly, softly, his voice almost echoing in the kitchen. “He is the bravest, kindest, strongest, most— most selfless person I have ever known.”
She’s still crying. But she’s looking at him, listening.
“And you…” He pauses, taking a deep breath, his hands shaking, his lip quivering. “And you fucked… every chance you got to have him in your life. Twenty years. You got twenty years of chances, and you fucked them all up.”
He stares for a moment.
“I can tell,” he says softly, “that there’s… a small part of you… that cares about him. Somewhere in there. So to that… small part.” He steps forward, his eyes burning. “I swear, I will… love him, and care for him, and look after him, and do everything I fucking can to make sure he feels as loved and protected as he is.”
He points a trembling finger at her.
“Because that is a privilege that I have.” He’s breathing hard, his eyes burning, his heart pounding in his chest. “And I will do everything in my power to not lose that privilege.”
He hesitates a moment longer, watching her cry before he turns around and picks up the mug and dumps the coffee in the sink. He rinses the mug quickly and shuts off the water harder than he needs to.
And he leaves. Without giving her a second glance.
He hands Steve the mug as he slides into the driver seat, and Steve laughs wetly, taking it.
“Thank you,” he says softly.
Eddie looks over at him, biting his lip. His face is tear-streaked, his lashes clumped, his cheeks and nose rosy red.
Broken and slowly pieced back together.
His eyes are gleaming, and he looks so awfully exhausted that Eddie wants to tell him to get in the back of the van to take a nap, but he also looks so relieved that Eddie just pulls him into a kiss.
“I love you,” he whispers, pressing their foreheads together. “With all my fuckin’ heart and soul, baby.”
“I love you too,” Steve whispers back.
Eddie kisses him again, sucking on his lower lip for a moment and holding his chin gently, and he pauses when they part, taking a soft breath.
“You’re not wearing any pants,” Steve says, laughing tearfully again, and Eddie scoffs, blinking tears back as he pulls out of the driveway.
“Who gives a shit?”
Steve giggles, clutching the mug to his chest.
“Let’s go home.”
“Okay.”
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ode-to-fury · 3 months ago
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I dont understand why people are having aneurisms about george spoiling helaena's death in his blog post? Like the book has been out? Isn't that like complaining about someone telling you that both romeo and juliet die in the end before you go see the play? And I am genuinely asking here because it's not an isolated thing i've seen upwards of ten people say he shouldn't have done it
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itissadbutitsmy-artblog · 6 months ago
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i wanted this comic digitalized so bad that i used max's birthday as an excuse. :)
this is the true ending. if im insane enough ill show you the alternate ending though
bonus because i just. it just kinda peters out. longggg post yayyye
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silverhalla · 3 months ago
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when I was little I used to play clue with my sister and when I won by being like “okay YOU don’t have the candlestick and I don’t have the candlestick and there are no more cards, so it’s gotta be the candlestick” she would get really mad and tell me I was cheating because I wasn’t supposed to be making assumptions like that and she didn’t understand where I was getting the info from, so I was ruining the game for her
anyways I don’t rly get why people on twt are THAT mad about veilguard spoilers because they do not seem that deep
#dragon age spoilers#dav#da4 spoilers#da4#and my GOD the spoilers are here in the comments too#but like I keep seeing people like ‘I can’t believe they’d just tell us that the blight is organic’#girl the blight’s BEEN organic#‘they said we’re gonna see things about solas’ past!!!!!’#at solas’ house? his house in the fade? where all the dreams and spirits and memories live? groundbreaking#I can see the whole ‘ghilan’nain has been experimenting on darkspawn’ thing as a shock to some people#and I’m not saying you have to read the companion books#but like….. that was established in tevinter nights#a book that’s been out for four years and pretty widely discussed in the fandom#also though the discourse around spoilers for da4 has just been bizarre in general#like idk man I think that BioWare/content creators being like ‘in two weeks there will be spoilers on twt’ is….. decent and reasonable?#and some of the comments are so……. ????#I just don’t think ‘I don’t like spoilers so no one else should be allowed to see them’ is a very hinged take#I saw someone who said that them saying ‘’maybe stay off twt for a minute’#was essentially them telling her that she couldn’t read the news or talk to her family#like WHAT are you talking about#and I think yeah! it is totally your right to not want to see spoilers absolutely 1000% fair#but why are you watching a 22 minute gameplay reveal and expecting it to be entirely context-free???#ESPECIALLY when all the videos have a warning at the beginning about spoilers??#on twt I keep seeing people who are like ‘showing all this stuff about the game in advance is rude to fans and HORRIBLE marketing’#what do you MEEEEAAAAANNNNNNNN
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