#reposted because i fucked up the poll

[bnyrbt]

Mainly coming from an art perspective here, although I know that’s not the only thing people use Instagram for. If you use something else in place of Instagram, please name it in the tags! Even if your “Instagram alternative” is just Tumblr, lol.

[velavesper]

i am going camping tomorrow to see the eclipse but i am also beginning to feel very deeply ill can you all cast spells of good health for me

[niningtori]

i know it's over | oneshot

read the alternate ending here!

pairing(s): choi beomgyu x you, kang taehyun x you

summary: you love beomgyu — you truly do — you just wish he loved you back, but after a particularly humiliating night in which he shows you just how little he cares, you finally decide enough is enough. enter kang taehyun, a sweet boy who's the polar opposite of beomgyu; but while you begin to develop your relationship with him, beomgyu realizes exactly what he's missing.

genre: ANGST, romance, hurt/comfort, fluff at the end

warnings: toxic relationships

word count: 7.3k

notes: repost/rewrite of one of my first works (formerly titled: to know him is to love him, and i do) THERE WILL BE AN ALTERNATE ENDING, YES the best friend's little brother!beomgyu au won the poll but i'm so hesitant to post it because i hate it so i thought i'd post this for now until i'm able to edit the other work enough to where it's not an actual eyesore.

you're tired. really tired. exhausted, even, as you stalk through the doorway of beomgyu's apartment. you practically tear off your coat, letting it land harshly on the living room floor with a slight thud. beomgyu rolls his eyes and picks it up with a sigh before hanging it up on the rack.

"i told you it was nothing. why are you freaking out?" he asks flatly.

"she was fucking you with her eyes, beomgyu!" you exclaim in frustration.

"and that's my fault how?"

"it's not your fault, but i'm sick of you entertaining women, let alone your actual fucking ex, while i'm standing right next to you!" his ex is just another fish in the barrel, or at least that's what he says, but the thought that they were intimate together at one point still makes you feel sick. truthfully, your boyfriend is handsome, so you've spent the better part of the past 10 months warding off the women who circle him like vultures. you wouldn't mind as much as you do if he seemed at all interested in helping you do so, especially when faced with his ex that you suspect he still has feelings for, but he does not. quite the opposite, actually. it's like he thrives off of the attention and, god, it hurts. 

"i'm not entertaining anybody. i told her i have a girlfriend now," he, well, you would say argues, but it's said so nonchalantly it doesn't warrant the term. 

"a girlfriend you proceeded to ignore while she hung off of your shoulders and laughed all night! i just don't understand how you don't understand how much it hurts my feelings. i'm a human, too! how would you feel if my ex, who was very clearly interested in me, hung around me right in front of you?" and it's like you're explaining empathy to a child. 

"me? i wouldn't give a fuck because it's not that serious," he replies with a slightly irritated shake of his head. 

it's always like this. always. you're always the one who cares more between the two of you. you were the one who asked him out in the first place. you were the one who initiated your first kiss. your first fight. hell, even your first reconciliation. you're not stupid, you know he doesn't feel quite the same way you do, but he has to feel something, right? otherwise, why would he say yes to you when he's rejected so many other women? your brain hurts trying to wrap your head around it all.

 "you're missing the point! if you were me, you would—" you begin frustratedly, but you cut yourself off. "you know what? i don't even have the energy to explain this to you. i don't understand why i have to explain basic human emotion to you, and i really don't understand why i have to beg and plead for you to care about how i feel!" you all but shriek.  

"you don't have to do shit, just leave if you're that fucking unhappy," he spits out angrily, which is the first real emotion — besides mild annoyance —  you've seen out of him this entire conversation. he gets impatient when you're like this, which usually results in you relenting, but not tonight. you're far too hurt to let go so easily.

"you're right! i am unhappy! i just — why don't you care that i'm unhappy? what can i do to make you give a fuck about me?" you have a brave face on but you can feel your eyes getting hot and your voice trembling ever so slightly. 

"you could try not being so damn needy, maybe that'd help."

your eyes redden even further and your lips unintentionally twist themselves into a sour frown. you hate it when he calls you needy because you do need a lot from him, it feels like. his time. his care. his attention and affection. yet you never seem to get it.

"do you not love me? like at all?" you ask. all of the venom in your tone has been sucked out mercilessly and you sound more helpless than angry.

"do you not realize how fucking crazy you sound?" he scoffs as if he can't fathom why you'd be upset. as if he's not watching you break down in real time. 

"why won't you give me a straight answer?" you question, voice softer than it was before.

he does nothing but scowl, and that's enough of an answer as it stands. he doesn't care. never has. probably never will. 

"then why'd you even say yes to dating me?" you truly don't understand. you thought you were different. you thought he saw something in you he didn't see in his harem of other suitors, and trust that there were many.  

"i dunno. i was just bored, i guess," he answers with a shrug and your world as you know it collapses. the man you love sees you as nothing more than a way to kill time. he's picking you up right now just to toss you away when the next shiny toy presents itself, and so far, you've let him drag you around because you love him — that's how much you love him — but looking at him now, at how unbothered he is, you wonder if you've even got anything left to give.

"i really do love you," you manage to squeeze out with a bitter smile. your poor heart is on display for the naked eye to see, and it seems like he really couldn't care less, but that won't stop you from asking: "does that mean anything at all to you?" 

"well, i'm sorry you feel that way," he says simply, "but that's not my fucking problem."

your heart sinks to your stomach and you feel like you're going to throw up. in this moment, as you watch the love of your life dismiss you like you're a fucking dog begging for scraps of food, you feel an overwhelming sense of clarity as you realize he doesn't love you. he doesn't even like you. he probably hates you, actually. like a mental montage, every moment in which he showed you that exact sentiment plays all at once in your head.

all those times you let him choose everything from movies to dinner because the idea of a compromise was inconceivable. all of those occasions, special and otherwise, where you were supposed to go out on a date, but he'd bail without a word and you'd forgive him with no apology. even something as menial as when you'd offer him your share of dessert because he ate all of his and you knew he wanted more, and he'd take it without so much as a thank you. how you'd sit and listen to him tell stories about how amazing his friends were, but he'd never even ask about your day. when those same friends would jokingly call you the perfect girlfriend, and you thought it was an indication of how good your relationship was, but in reality, it was a way to tease him because the thought of actually being with you was so abhorrent and ridiculous that it must be a joke. nobody likes a desperate girl, after all. all those times you told him you loved him and he'd just smile and kiss you deeper. memories like these flood your brain with a vengeance so cruel it makes your head ache, and in a way, you realize it's ridiculous to be surprised when there was so much proof of his feelings in the first place.  

"oh. okay," you say with what you hope is a soft and unbothered laugh, but comes out more as a choked one. "i guess there's nothing left to say. i'll get my shit and go." 

you hesitate for a few excruciatingly awkward moments before collecting yourself enough to start gathering your things, which are scattered haphazardly around his apartment from his bedroom to his bathroom. it's like a walk of shame, almost, and you feel even shittier when he plops down on the couch with a long suffering sigh as he begins to massage the bridge of his nose. you feel so small in this moment — like a petulant child who just got done throwing an unsuccessful tantrum — and you're now soaking in the sobering aftermath and sitting with the thought that he just watched you have a meltdown like he was watching a monkey putting on a show. how much more is he going to humiliate you? enough is enough, you think, so before you can actually finish collecting all of your belongings, you're scurrying out of the apartment. before you go, you glance back at him one last time. 

"beomgyu?" you ask tentatively, tears clouding your eyes. 

"yeah?" he replies with a sigh. this is it, you think.

"i don't want to see you ever again," you say firmly. before he can reply, if he ever intended to in the first place, you slam the door. 

-

there's a lot to love about beomgyu. for one, he's handsome, which is obvious, but he has a certain allure you could never help but be drawn in by. he's always been a charming man, but even more so when he's talking to a woman he's interested in. as interested as he could be, that is. he's funny and comically pompous when he wants to be, but still somehow down to earth despite it all. 

he's been described as a mood-maker, and while he grew to resent that term, you thought it was at least partially true, if only in the context of your relationship. when he's sad, you're devastated. when he's happy, you're over the fucking moon. his feelings are your whole world — or were, you guess, since all that's over now.

it wasn't all bad all the time, you think. there were times where you thought he really might reciprocate even a fraction of what you felt for him, and most of the time, that was enough. you could work with that. love looks different for everyone, you would reason. maybe he just had a funny way of showing it. 

there were days where you'd laugh together and end the night lying in each other's arms while you'd cradle him like he was the most precious thing in the whole world because, to you, he really was. he was normally so boisterous when with his friends, but while he would never admit it to anyone else, he'd tell you about some of his insecurities while you gently combed your fingers through his long, silky hair. he'd speak of regrets and longing for people to take him more seriously. he'd never say it, but he wanted people to see you like you saw him. the real him. you'd let him cry while your hands cupped his cheeks and you'd shush him while he fiddled mindlessly with your hair like a child. you'd kiss the tip of his reddened nose until he laughed instead of cried. times like those, you'd really think you were someone special to him, but now you realize you were wrong. you were just an outlet for him, and anyone willing to be an emotional dumping ground would do the trick, too.

after a few weeks of moping, your sadness has begun to morph into anger and resentment. you spent nearly a year of your life trying to make an emotionally stunted man care about you, and that's not even counting the years of pining over him before you finally worked up the courage to ask him out. it was difficult to see it in the moment, but after being away from him for so long, it's crystal clear that he was honestly just an asshole who didn't really like you. nothing more, nothing less. maybe he'd find someone to change for someday, maybe he'd even work things out with his ex, but for whatever reason, you weren't her. that's just the way it goes, you guess. what really bothers you are the "what if's" of the situation. what if you were prettier, or smarter, or kinder; would he have seen you for who you really are? would he have grown to appreciate you if you had given him more to appreciate? 

either way, there's no use crying over spilled milk now. you won't be going back to him any time soon, and he certainly won't come crawling back to you. you'll continue to think of him less and less until your time together fades into a distant (and unpleasant) memory. you smile at the thought.

-

the first time beomgyu realizes just how impactful your absence is, nothing in particular happens. it's a regular tuesday night a week or so after your "breakup" and he's bored out of his mind. he showers, listens to music, texts his friends and makes himself dinner, but something is missing. 

as he sits on his couch, he realizes what it is: you. right about now, you should be pestering him to hang out and showing up on his doorstep to watch a movie. he'd roll his eyes at first, but eventually relent as long as he got to pick the movie, of course. he wouldn't say it, but he'd actually enjoy glancing over and seeing your reactions. you were comically expressive and every twist and turn of the plot had your eyes bulging and mouth agape, turning to him for confirmation that he was seeing the same things you were. when you watched inception for the first time, it absolutely rocked your world.

he's alone, but he puts on a movie, anyway. every so often, his head turns to the side with the corner of his mouth raised, but you're not there to give a reaction. he should be used to your absence by the third twist, but he still finds himself subconsciously turning to you throughout the rest of the movie. when the credits roll, he's half expecting to hear you chatter on about how crazy it was, but it's silent. the only time that would happen would be when you'd accidentally drift off in spite of how engrossed you were. you'd try to fight it off like a stubborn kid, but would succumb by the final act. he smiles at the memory before shaking his head in disbelief. what's wrong with him? 

moments like these plague him more and more frequently, but the most notable one is the night before his first day at a new job. he briefly talks to his friends about his excitement, but he's too embarrassed to divulge just how anxious he is. times like this, he'd come over and complain for however long he needed. you'd sit and nod, asking questions during his pauses to encourage him to continue, always adding appropriate and thoughtful commentary. 

his thoughts wander to how you're doing alone. you really love him, it seems, so he can only imagine how you're faring without him. he wishes you hadn't blocked his number so he could at least ask how you are. maybe you'd even tell him you miss him. not for the first time, he begins to wonder if he pushed you too far this time around. you've gotten angry and given him the silent treatment before, sure, but you've never blocked him and you've certainly never done it for so long. 

he looks you up on instagram for the first time since your breakup. he's not terribly surprised when he sees he's blocked on there too, but all it takes is a switch to his photography account, which you had forgotten to block, to see what you're up to now. 

the first thing he notices is a picture of you sitting outside with an ice cream cone in hand, sun encircling you. your smile is beaming and your eyes are crinkled and he can almost hear your giggle through the screen. the caption reads "ice cream date with my best friend!”

he scrambles through his memories to try to remember a time in recent history when you two did something similar, but he comes up blank. what he does recall, though, is you mentioning a new frozen yogurt place you wanted to visit with him for your birthday. he nodded in response, but he knew he wouldn't go with you, opting instead to get shitfaced with his friends. in retrospect, maybe you knew it, too. he had checked his phone the next morning and saw he had at least half a dozen missed calls and well over a dozen texts from you. when he finally texted you back, you took almost a full 5 hours to respond, which was uncommon. usually, you'd text back within minutes. it occurred to him later on that that was your version of the silent treatment, and it amused him that you could only hold out for a few hours. he honestly found it kind of cute. 

he remembers what you did for his birthday. how you had secretly invited his friends over to his apartment to surprise him after an especially shitty day at work. he came home to an elaborately decorated apartment and all of his favorite people greeting him. he remembers how happy you looked when he opened up your present to him, which was the guitar he had always secretly wanted but could never quite justify buying for himself. you were so excited, any spectator would think he had gotten you the gift of your dreams and not the other way around. you were practically buzzing with excitement when he pulled you in for a kiss. his friends had whooped at the display of affection, and you giggled shyly at their reaction. what did he get you for your birthday again? anything?

he spends days pondering over this and similar circumstances, which eventually turn into weeks upon weeks. what starts as a nagging feeling that he may have gone too far in his neglect for you becomes guilt and anxiety. he recalls just how torn up you seemed the last time he saw you. to be honest, at the time, he was mostly just irritated. but he never thought you'd actually leave. all he can see is that awful look on your face when you finally ended everything, and all he can remember is the fact that he put it there. he knows in his heart that he has no right to feel this way, but he feels it all the same. 

-

you would have never imagined you'd actually like somebody other than beomgyu, but taehyun makes it as easy as possible given the sticky circumstances. you met at a club your best friend dragged you to, both you and taehyun had to remain sober (designated drivers, of course) and ended up having a surprisingly engaging conversation amidst the blaring music and strobe lights. after that, the rest is history. 

he can tell you've been hurt before, but he gently coaxes you into opening up as you spend more and more time with him. you're afraid of being overbearing and coming across as a lovesick puppy again, but taehyun is gentle and seems to enjoy your attention and affection, even if he's a surface level tsundere. more than that, he actually reciprocates it. 

do you still think about beomgyu? of course. do you miss him? well, you'd never admit it to a single soul, but the way you see him in everything has to be an indicator that you do. it's getting better, though. more bearable. 

a month or so into your relationship, you post about taehyun for the first time. you don't know why you're so nervous about announcing to the world that you have a boyfriend again, but happiness overwhelms your fear when you're met with nothing but positivity. 

-

beomgyu is shellshocked, to put it mildly. the picture of you and your so-called boyfriend is sickly sweet. it's not over the top or anything—just a candid of you in a café holding hands with him while looking over the same menu. the caption is nothing other than a heart and squirrel emoji (why?) and both he and your best friend are tagged. his finger jumps to the boy's profile and he sees the same photo. he scoffs at the cheesiness of it all, but his heart aches at the way all of your friends have commented on the post expressing their happiness for you — they had never approved of him for reasons he's only now beginning to understand.

you always defended him in front of your friends no matter what he did or didn't do. you'd "comfort" him after your friends said something snarky and explain that they just didn't understand him. you'd say that if they knew the real him, they'd see him differently. at the time, he'd scoff and say something along the lines of "i don't need for them to see me differently because i couldn't give less of a fuck about what they think”. you'd be hurt, of course you would be, but you'd never say so.

more and more, like an outsider looking in, he can see just how awful he was to you. it's to his horror that he realizes this must be the case for you, too. the chances of you getting back together with him seem slimmer and slimmer, especially now that you've got that pretty boy on your arm. your words echo in his mind as if to haunt him: "what can i do to make you give a fuck about me?" leave, apparently, and don't look back. 

he can't keep living like this. 

-

a knock on your door is all it takes to ruin your night — you had actually had a really good day up until now. you and taehyun had gone on a breakfast date and napped together until he had to leave in the afternoon, so you're humming now in contentment while applying your nightly skincare, thinking relentlessly about the boy you think you might be starting to love. it feels different from the love you felt for beomgyu, but in a good way. you still think about him and wonder how he's doing, but you always derail that train of thought with a god-given force previously unknown to you. he doesn't care about you, you chant to yourself — it's almost like your daily mantra. in the midst of your thoughts, you hear a knock on the door. you smile widely when you surmise that it's probably taehyun again. you don't realize just how big your grin is until it drops. 

standing before you is not your lovely boyfriend, but the man who made you question whether or not you were even lovable in the first place. he has a small smile on his face, and if you were to look a little more carefully, you'd notice that he actually seems a little nervous. 

"hi," he says, breaking the silence. his heart is racing a mile a minute, and potential scenarios battered his mind the entire way here. what would you do when you saw him? smile? he could handle that. cry? he could also handle that, even if he didn't want to see your tears. what he is not prepared for is the blankness of your features when you ask: 

"what are you doing here?" 

his smile falters almost imperceptibly.

"i, uh, i just wanted to see you." you're merciful enough to give him a nod of encouragement to continue. "a-and i wanted to tell you that i haven't stopped thinking about you for the past few months, and that i, um, i think i'm finally ready to be with you," he finishes with a shaky breath.

you're quiet for a moment and squint your eyes as if you're deep in thought.

"but i thought you were dating someone now? your ex?"

"i'm not!" he says almost a little too quickly.

"i heard you were," you counter, not quite believing him. you heard he had been seeing his ex from one of your friends who happened to live in her apartment complex. she had seen his car in the parking lot a few times in the last couple of weeks and had no reason to lie to you.

"w-well, i've seen her a few times, but not seriously. i — to be honest, i was just trying to get over you, but i've finally realized that i can't becau—"

"so, just to make sure i understand, you're not over me so you're seeing her?" his eyes widen in shock before his head hangs in shame as he realizes exactly what he's done and how he must look to you right about now, but you're not finished. "isn't that what you were doing with me?" your voice is low and indifferent, but each word feels tailor-made to slash at his heart. "wow, i guess some things really never change, but don't worry, i'm sure once she moves on, you'll finally see the good in her instead of me," you spit out.

"can you listen to me? please?" beomgyu is so ashamed he wants to die. he fumbles for the right words, but when he accidentally makes eye contact with you, they die on his lips. he wishes you would give him time to process what you're saying and mull over what to respond with because you always knew he was bad with words, but he supposes he lost the right to your patience a long time ago.

"you want me to listen to you so you can fuck with my head until the next person rolls around?" the latter words are strangled by the tightness in your throat, and he can't help but wince. when he thinks it's over, you continue. 

"nobody has ever made me feel as small as you have. i hated myself because of you," your lip trembles and before he can say a word, you're raising your hand to shut the door.

"wait, wait, wait! just let me say this," he pleads as he gently grasps the doorframe. "i... i love you." he almost thinks he hears you gasp, but he's too busy looking into your unreadable eyes to know for sure. he has never said anything like this to you before. you're completely silent for a few moments before breaking the tense atmosphere.

"j-jesus, i mean, i guess i just don't know what to say," you sputter and his eyes alight with what looks suspiciously like hope. "except maybe that... i'm sorry you feel that way?" you finish with a sardonic smile and a roll of your eyes. before he can respond, which he actually intends to do this time around, you slam the door in his face.

-

if you were to ask beomgyu if he loved his ex mere months ago, he'd say he didn't know for sure, but probably. they ended things rather messily, which seems to be a trend for him, but if he really thinks about it, he doesn't know what he liked about her after all. if he had to pinpoint it, he liked the thrill of the chase and the idea of never knowing how explosive things would inevitably get between the two of them. he liked the toxicity. only now does he understand that that wasn't love at all, but some sort of sick game of hurting and being hurt he doesn't want to play anymore. he doesn't want to hurt the people around him, especially not you, but it would appear that that sentiment has presented itself a little too late. 

there's always been a lot to love about you. always. you're so kind and so incredibly patient, at least with the people you love. you're thoughtful and intentional with your words and actions. you're not perfect, but you try your best to be a good and fair person. and you listen. like, really listen. the kind of listening where you're not just waiting for your turn to talk, but the kind where you genuinely want to know what the other person has to say. even if he didn't know it at the time, beomgyu always did love you. was it in the way you deserved? obviously, with the way things are now, it's perfectly clear it was not. 

even if he does bump into you, it's completely pointless. you made it perfectly clear that you want nothing to do with him. the last thing you said to him echoes in his head with an unspeakable viciousness. 

"i'm sorry you feel that way." he didn't realize just how cruel those words were until they were falling from your lips instead of his. he didn't realize just how cruel he was in general. 

he ponders over how succinctly you summed up your entire dynamic:

"i don't understand why i have to explain basic human emotion to you, and i really don't understand why i have to beg and plead for you to care about how i feel!" to be honest? he doesn't understand why you had to do that, either. 

contrary to what one might suppose about him given his overall shitty personality, he had actually had a pretty good go at life. he was innately able to make the world sit and watch him go, and he wouldn't let anyone forget it. but what should he do since you don't want to watch him anymore? what should he do since you don't want anything to do with him anymore? 

as he sits in the extremely uncomfortable chair of his new least favorite bar, he's confronted by this truth over and over again. he's not completely sure why he's even here — he hates this place, but he remembers you mentioning you liked to come here. in hindsight, there's no doubt that that was a way to hint that you'd like to come with him, but what use is it to recognize it now, after all this time? 

not much, apparently. or at least that's what his conscience is telling him. he should leave, he thinks. he should stop coming here every night hoping he'll run into you because it's wrong to make you uncomfortable when you've said in no uncertain terms that you don't want him anymore. he should, he should, he should. and he will, really. in just a minute. that's what he tells himself, but he just watches the door as he gets drunker and drunker, still.

he's on the brink of literally passing out when he hears a sound he'd recognize anywhere: your laugh. he actually thinks he's hallucinating just because he wants to hear it so fucking badly, but it takes the sound of your voice to convince him it's real. you're actually here. he's incredibly drunk, so the idea of being tactful escapes him. he can't miss this chance.

-

you try, and try, and try some more, but you can't seem to forget beomgyu's last words to you. he loves you? you scoff at the idea. does he even know what love is? it doesn't feel like it —  truly, it doesn't. if that's what his love feels like, you'd rather not feel it at all. 

that's what you keep trying to hammer into your head along with the idea that you're doing well, and you are doing well. seriously. things with taehyun are better than ever and you can really see yourself building a life with him. everything feels so pure and brand new. your feelings for him may lack the intensity that you felt with beomgyu, but that was years in the making, so it's only fair that you nurture the love that's blossoming between the two of you while smothering out the embers of what used to be with beomgyu. it's only right, right? it should be, but the way you're so torn makes your head spin.

so you decide to go to your favorite bar and forget about everything for the night. it's been a long while since you've let loose, and you're excited. you're surrounded by your friends and you're ready to let go. it's only when you excuse yourself to get some fresh air that you realize fate has other plans. 

when you're walking to the curb to take a seat, you feel a tug on your elbow and whip around. 

"who —" you stop dead in your tracks as your eyes meet with beomgyu's misty ones. the ones you used to love so much. 

"hey," he says weakly.

"what do you want?" you seethe while harshly yanking your elbow from his grasp. his lips purse and even in the dim lighting outside of the bar, you can see his eyes water even more. he's always been such a baby when he's drunk. 

"i just wanna talk," he pleads. he sounds so out of it and looks so pathetic you almost feel bad for him. almost.

"i have nothing to say to you," you reply coldly. 

"but i do." he sounds desperate to a degree that you sincerely never thought you'd hear.

"what, are you gonna tell me you love me again?" you retort with a roll of your eyes. you're obviously being sarcastic, but all he can think in his drunken state is how pretty your eyes shine even when they're impatient to look away from him.

"if you're not gonna say anything, i'm leaving," you snap, turning away, but beomgyu is awoken from his daze and gently pulls you back.

"n-no! i mean, yes. i love you, b-but that's not what i wanted to say."

"well, what did you want to say?" you ask, tone laced with annoyance. 

seeing that you'll actually give him a chance to hear him out, he scrambles for a moment before clearing his throat. he’s so anxious that you can see his hands shaking as he wrings them.

"i just want to tell you that i’m sorry. i know i’ve said it before, but i want you to hear it again, and i’ll tell you as many times as it takes for you to believe me. i want to make it up to you — i really do — and i know that i can change. i'm — i just miss you so much i can't stand it. i-if you don’t feel the same way, or don’t care, or however it is, i understand; but i meant it when i said i love you, and i mean it now when i say that i'm so, so fucking sorry," his voice cracks as he finishes and hot tears threaten to find their way down his face. 

"beomgyu..." you begin, not really sure what to say. what is there to say? and any hope he has of being with you is almost extinguished when he sees how much you pity him in this moment, but he'll hold on for as long as you'll let him.

"you said you saw the real me. you know i'm not all bad, right? i'm a piece of shit, but i can't be all bad," he pleads, tears now streaming unabashedly from his eyes. maybe if he can just find the right words, you won't leave him.

"beomgyu," you sigh, "i've never thought that about you. i know you're not all bad," his face perks up at this and he's tempted to bury his face in your neck and sob in pure relief. the pain he's been feeling for the past few months is about to be over because you understand him. always have. even though he's like this, you can still see the good in him. just the thought alone is enough to fill him with pure ecstasy. he goes to close the distance between the two of you to pull you into his embrace, but you gently place your hand on his chest before he can come any closer.

"thank you for telling me how you feel, beomgyu, but if you think you can fix everything with a few words, you're delusional." his face crumbles at this and a sense of panic and dread pools in his stomach.

"w-what? b-but you said —" 

"i know you're sorry, and i know you'd probably try to make it up to me if i let you, but that's not enough. you really hurt me, okay? and it's just, you know, i'm finally happy now, and i have taehyun. i really like him, beomgyu. and he really likes me," you say with a fond smile, as if you're thinking of taehyun right now, and his heart shatters into a million pieces. 

"it's okay," he smiles bitterly, tears still flowing freely. "i... i understand. i just want you to be happy. i want you to be so happy. you deserve it."

"but..."

"go back in," he sniffles. "you don't need to stay here with me anymore." he swipes at his eyes with his sleeve and tries to send you off with a smile, but it's so forlorn, you wish he'd just keep frowning.

"... okay." you turn away, and even though he told you to do it, he can't help but feel an even bigger lump in his throat now that you're actually listening to him.

"beomgyu?" you say softly, before you enter the door. 

his damned heart can't help but flutter again against his will. 

"yes?" 

"don't wait for me anymore, okay?" and he knows you’re being kind, but it feels so final, it hurts more than any hateful words ever could. he should agree, but the ugly and selfish part of him refuses to lie, so he just shakes his head and waves you off. his love is ugly and his heart is broken, but it's still yours to have. 

"I'm sorry," he murmurs again to nobody but himself as you enter the bar.

-

“tyuuunn,” you whine into your phone’s speaker. you can’t tell how it's been since your final conversation with beomgyu, but now you’re drunk and all you can think about is taehyun. about his kindness, how happy he makes you feel, and how much you want to give him all of that in return.

“what is it, baby?” he coos. even in your inebriated state, you can hear the smile in his voice and it makes you wanna smile, too. 

“miss youuu,” you groan. he laughs at your childishness, and you can feel just how much he’s doting on you. it’s a relatively new feeling, being cared for like this, but it’s one you welcome with fervor.

“let me pick you up from that stupid bar so you can stay the night. how’s that sound?” 

“mmm, hurry up,” you pout, and he just laughs again. god, you’re gonna feel so embarrassed by your neediness come tomorrow morning, and he can’t wait to tease you. 

taehyun is so eager to see you, he almost gets pulled over twice while making his way to the bar. he just can’t wait to see how cute you’ll look in his arms, all whiny and grumpy and begging for affection; and he’ll baby you, like he always does, because you deserve it. when he had heard about your appalling history with beomgyu, he couldn’t believe how someone could treat a person as sweet as you so cruelly. truth be told, you do have a bit of a softer personality, but that only evoked the need to protect and cherish you in taehyun. he can’t fathom the idea that somebody would see someone so pure and decide to take advantage instead of nurturing that innocence. his friends keep saying he’s a sucker, and they’re probably right, but he’ll happily be one for you. 

he’s lost in his thoughts when he pulls into the parking lot of the bar you’re in, but his dopey grin drops the second he sees your dreaded ex stumbling away from the building. his face is red, and he’s feverishly wiping away tears and snot. taehyun is a smart man, so he can easily piece together what must have happened, but the thought that you were still thinking of taehyun in this moment comforts him. you had run into your ex, and instead of running back to him, you’re thinking of your new boyfriend. what a relief. taehyun has always known you were still a little broken up about your split with beomgyu. he came into this relationship fully knowing that, but he liked you so much, he really didn’t care. maybe it was rash of him, but he thought it was worth taking a chance. he thought you were worth taking a chance, and so far, he had been correct. 

he parks and stays in his car. if he were a petty person, he might ignore beomgyu and just walk right by him with his arm wrapped around your waist. taehyun, however, is a good person. so good, in fact, he waits for beomgyu’s friend to pick him up before leaving his car to find you.

when he enters the bar, he scans the crowd before he finds you sitting with your friends. your phone is to your ear and it only takes a few seconds for his own to ring. he smiles when he sees your contact photo (the one you both took on a date to your favorite frozen yogurt shop) appear on his screen. he rejects the call and watches you pout before striding over to you and placing his hand on your shoulder. you turn around with a scowl, but your features immediately melt, and you grace him with a toothy grin. you excitedly squeal and wrap your arms around him. he matches your enthusiasm as he peppers your face with kisses.

beomgyu, who has very unfortunately come back to get his phone, watches it all and it’s enough to make him nauseous. he’s in such a daze as he watches you two that he barely registers his own friend honking at him to hurry up. he sees the afterimage of you leaning into taehyun’s touch and accepts the fact that you’ve truly moved on and won’t be coming back. he replays the last conversation you had and he decides he’ll hold onto your words forever. they’re all he has left, after all.

-

you’re so used to taehyun’s apartment that even though you’re drunk enough to see stars, you’re still able to navigate it with ease. taehyun sits you down on his couch and kneels while removing your shoes for you. 

“so chivalrous,” you giggle. 

“anything for my princess,” he replies cheekily with the biggest grin you’ve ever seen. 

“why are you so nice?” 

“because i like you,” he says as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world.

“i like you, too.” you whisper while your face warms. your gaze becomes heated, and he cups your cheeks while gently guiding your face towards his. his touch is soft, and his lips? even softer. 

he doesn’t push for more. you’re drunk and vulnerable at the moment, so he graciously grabs some of his clothes for you to change into and waits for you to come to bed. when you do, you plop down and he pulls you into his arms. you smile at his earnestness. he locks his arms around you, and for the first time in your life, a man is making you feel so happy and secure you can’t help but melt into the feeling. you feel safe. you feel loved.

“i really like you, you know?” he whispers into your hair, and it’s all you can do to keep your heart inside of your chest. 

“i know. i really like you, too.” and you do. things with taehyun are still new, but as his breathing slows, you realize this is how love should be, and you think you want to be with him for a long, long time.

notes pt. 2: yes there will be an alternate ending where she ends up with gyu :,)

[taglist]

permanent (sfw only): @defnotleee @yaoizee

permanent (sfw/[n]sfw): @lonelybutterflytae @cherrycolaberry @midwinterblizzard @sooberryworld @20-cms @hyueika @boba-beom @vicurious28 @blossommi @lickingan0rchid @katsukis1wife @binniebakery @notevenheretbh1 @shymexican @that1sadgrl @archoive @paegesoobin @buttercreamerie @ifwtxt @softesyoongi @serenityism00 @fairfootedflekk @kyanmeai @definitelynotherr @hyunj00 @taehyunluvrs @m00gyu @denleave1088 @hwanghyunjinismybae @bmo-bri

if you would like to join any of my taglists, send an ask or join here!

[unholyverse]

MYSPACE 1.0 THEME REFRESH (originally by conkersradfurday, refreshed by unholyverse)

live previews: 1, 2 / download (pastebin)

hi! i've been using this old theme for years now because other myspace themes don't hit the same, but i've been tweaking a lot of it for personal use. i think it's been long enough since this theme has been abandoned that i can upload something that can handle itself better on modern tumblr.

main features

asks are formatted to look like myspace comments. fun!

four custom links

myspace buttons to follow, message, or block the blog owner

a bunch of info spaces so the world can know what you're about

extra font options

functional search bar (but this is tumblr so...semi functional?)

that web 2.0 ugly goodness

other features + info below the cut

new features

friend space - ever wanna show off your friends? now you can with the friend space to show off your top 8 9 friends on your blog. don't have enough friends? no worries, you can always toggle it off

image space - wanna put a bunch of blinkies somewhere? you'll need to have a bit of html and css knowledge for it, but you can go into the code and add as many images as you'd like. just look for the section and start pasting those images. it's a little tedious but tbh that's just the authentic myspace experience isn't it? but if that's not your thing, you can also toggle it off too.

tweaked/deleted features

had to delete the music player :( sorry but it used flash and i'm not really sure how to make a music player in javascript yet

added username input because it was annoying me that your title could be your name and it didn't make sense in most cases

deleted infinite scroll because the script was super outdated

added the ability to change the "online now!" gif. the original gif will always be in the defaults of the code.

changed the text post header font to verdana because it was impact and you could not fucking read that and it wasn't accurate to a myspace bulletin anyways

deleted the feature that force showed all the pages you made on your blog. so annoying. it will look a little weird if you have asks/submissions deactivated, but i doubt many of you using the theme will have them closed anyways

changed the dead links to redirect to the actual myspace site

extra recommended add-ons

scm music player: a customizable music player with tons of different skins and tons of songs you're able to add

unblue polls by @glenthemes: what it says basically; allows you to customize the colors of tumblr polls on your blog

cursors-4u.com: i love these dinky little cursors they're so fun. great if you really wanna lean into the 2000s aspect of the theme

cursor sparkles: what else is there to say about this they're just fun

notes

i plan on updating the theme semi-regularly if bugs are brought up and stuff (which you can tell me through my inbox)

hopefully i can work on extra tweaks as time goes on (such as figuring out how to add a footer image to videos, toggle tags, etc)

don't repost/claim as your own because it already isn't mine in the first place

like/reblog if you use!

update log

added a tags toggle + tweaked the video post sizes

made the "is in your extended network" status customizable to add different text. feel free to tell the world how many gas station boner pills you took

added an official theme link

[nastyc2nt]

Dabble of Shoto that won the polls.

✦ ──────── ᖭི༏ᖫྀ ──────── ✦

Sho really doesn’t like to be a bother in your relationship and never acts on most things because he’s afraid of being too much for you. In bed it’s a completely separate matter, he’s taking what he wants but gives just as much as he takes. Fucking you is the only thing he’s selfish at.

“Sho?” You purr as your felt his arms sink around your waist, his breathing tickling your neck. You try and turn your neck as far as you can get a glimpse at his face. “What’s wrong?” you lean back into his hold like normal. Shoto really only holds you so close when he’s upset, not to say he doesn’t show affection — this is just is default behavior for being upset.

A tingly sensation swept your body while you felt him place wet kisses on your neck, you could hear his heavy breathing as he’s practicing trying to eat you up. The final straw was him jerk you back into him against his harden cock, he was unapologetic. He had been think of you so much today, so many hours away on patrol and bent up from just the slightest glimpse of your clothed sex this morning. He was needy.

“Can I fuck you?” before a rough fuck, soft or a quick oral session he’s always asking for consent. He was pleading in a voice you haven’t heard before, breathily and kinda…Pathetic in a away. Yet, it sent shives down to your core and you push back into him and grind down on his tent.

“That’s it—” his hands go up your shirt to feel the naked skin and straight to your perky nipples. “I have been waiting to sink deep inside.” He’s pushing you against the nearest surface to have you spread your legs, yanking your underwear down and doesn’t take his time to get is fingers inside you. The faster you’re stretched out, the faster he can fuck you.

While he’s fingering you, he makes you stroke his painfully harden cock and whining slightly at the release of pressure and how sensitive he is.

“Precious, you remember our safe word don’t you?” he nips at your shoulder as he alines himself with your aching and clinching hole, “Tell me to stop and I will, just try to endure it for me? I need to break you.”

¡!Don’t repost my posts on other websites, don’t translate them, theses are for me to publish on my own!!

Taglist: @sparklylanddetective @fvitos

[jesterthestar]

☆ | author's note : I KNOW THIS WAS WIRTTEN LIKE A MILLION TIMES , but in my opinion shinobu is the most interesting to look over and i think she has alot of options and opinions soo. Anw im getting bored of my current layout , so maybe remake to another character ?? The poll will be after the said hc's. I hope you enjoy this piece !! <33

. . warnings ★ : MINORS DO NOT INTERACT nsfw under the cut ; two versions : for male and female readers ; oral sex ( both reader and char receiving ) ; anal sex ; masturbation ; somnophilia ; drugging ; fingering ; not proofread.

𔓕   ..     ┊    Afab reader !

When with a female reader she is probably a switch with a lean towards a dom. Sometimes she wants to watch your frame shaking from the overstimulation shes given you and sometimes she wants to a strap deep inside of her pussy.

Shinobu has a fair share of knowledge on how to pleasure a body of a female first of all because of her medical expiriance and second of all actually trying masturbation on herself in many different ways.

Shower heads , pillow humping , edging and much more and she is going to use it on your mercilessly when you have sex.

But it will be pretty hard to get.

Shinobu sees sex as something to show emotions and love for their partner so doesn't do it from just lust , in fact it's hard to turn her on in ordinary life so you'll have to beg and basically degrade yourself in front of her , so she'll finally understand that you can't deal with the ache. Which leads up to one of her kinks !

She like watching you trying to even muster a word as you're on the floor by her while she's doing anything , legs spread , arms tied behind your back and you're on the verge of tears. You're absolutely exposed and shinobu is not willing to cooperate.

BEST SCENARIO OUT OF EVERYTHING SHE MIGHT DO TBH.

Something i think she'd practice is drugging , though only if you give her permission. She finds something attractive in you waking up because of the immense pleasure that she is serving you, watching your cunt spasm around her fingers while you're sleepish face frowns snd whines from her , slowly but surely waking up.

I feel like she isn't really into anal if her partner is a woman, she might do it if you insist or really want to try if you like it or not. To her it's unsafe and unlike males you have a hole made for it.

But if you do she is really gentle and careful.

As mentioned previously you two rarely have sex, but if you do , oh boy , you'll be fucked or fucking her hours on end.

She likes eating you out. Softly massaging your clit , her tongue gliding against your folds. She holds one of your hands to give you some sort of support.

Would do again. 10/10

𔓕   ..     ┊    Amab reader !

I feel like she'd be a power bottom or a dom.

Something about her being so small and yet making you wonce and tremble makes her even more turned on.

Doesn't like 69 , so ya'll give oral tp each other seperatly.

Shinobu doesn't suck you off much , because again she is small and has a gag reflex, so she likes giving you small kitten licks more than actually taking your whole dick into her mouth. Likes tasting the salty beads of precum on your cockhead.

Probably edges you before plopping herself onto your dick and fucking borh you and herself until her brain is numb and dead.

( im sorry i didn't have much ideas for this . )

@P1ERROST4R ON TUMBLR. Do not repost / translate / copy my work.

[bbyquokka]

1:16 pm (hhj)

𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆 | hwang hyunjin x gender neutral reader

𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐑𝐄 | timestamp, smut – 18+ is strongly advised!

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 | established relationship, dirty thoughts, consensual distribution of sexual pics/videos, sex toys, little bit of nipple play

𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃𝐒 | 0.8k ~ (896)

𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄 | this won in the poll i did a few days ago! i hope you all enjoy! don’t forget to leave feedback, reblog and tell me what you think here. curious as to what is next? here is my wips list! i hope you all enjoy! ���3

♡ m.list — ♡ you can also read it on my ao3

dont repost. dont translate. minors, ageless & default blogs; dni! feedback and reblogs are highly advised and appreciated!

he's bored. the meeting he is currently stuck in is boring. his eyes keep drooping, threatening to close whilst the tall coffee he got from the coffee shop is failing to do its job and keep him awake.

he's been cranky since the moment he woke up at five am. hyunjin wanted nothing more than to stay in bed with the person he loves, maybe even make love to you when you woke up.

either way, everything is irritating him, no matter how small or big it seems. his collar on his white shirt feels too tight around his neck. his blazer feels that it's constricting him. his suit pants feeling more and more uncomfortable as time goes on. 

he glances at his silver watch that sits on his wrist, groaning at the fact that he has 4 more hours of his superior telling him the same old stuff that he already knows. he knows the company needs to up their sales. he knows the company had a rough month last month. he knows because he looks at the numbers and puts it all together. because he was the one that made the superiors aware of how shit the company has been doing lately.

hyunjin's mind drifts to you. it drifts to this morning where he had to leave you. it drifts to how beautiful and ethereal you looked. your face all cute and smushed together. the duvet covering your body but somehow outlining your curves. the soft snores and whimpers of his name. the way you'd roll over into a more comfortable position and just flop on your back.

he wanted to ruin you. pepper your skin in kisses and bruises. caress your skin and your curves and listen to your sweet and beautiful moans in the form of his name whilst he watches your mind slowly cloud over and fill with nothing but thoughts of him.

fuck, hyunjin wishes he didn't have to attend this stupid meeting. 

as he listens to his superior drone on and on about useless information, he feels his phone vibrate. he frowns and pulls it out of his pocket, keeping it under the desk.

a message from you. he thought it was just a simple “good morning” message but as he opens it up, his eyes widen and throat becomes dry.

you sent him a video. a video of you bouncing on your clear suction dildo. you have your back to the camera so hyunjin can see everything so perfectly. the way the dildo disappears and reappears. the way your ass ripples with each bounce. how you lean forward slightly to give hyunjin that perfect view. unfortunately, his phone is on silent so he can't hear you but he can use his imagination.

he swallows thickly, eyes glued to the screen. his body heats up as tingles shoot all over his body and lay dormant in the pit of his stomach. hyunjin shuffles in his seat slightly, readjusting himself and crossing his legs to hide the growing erection 

hyunjin [7:30]: well, good morning to me i guess 🤤

yn [7:30]: good morning, hyun! 😇

hyunjin [7:31]: my love. you can't be sending me stuff like that. im still in a meeting! 

yn [7:31]: aw :( did you not like it?

hyunjin [7:32]: quite the opposite darling. i fucking loved it which is a problem when i'm at work 🫣

yn [7:34]: great! then you wouldn't mind if i sent you more stuff 😇😚

hyunjin audibly groans which causes heads to turn. he looks up, clears his throat and shoves his phone in his pocket.

“apologies. just family stuff.” the superior gives hyunjin a disgruntled grunt before continuing on with the meeting. hyunjin rolls his eyes, his mind now wondering back to the video you sent him and the possibilities of what's to come.

his mind wanders into a daydream. it wanders back to the video you sent him and how he wishes he was behind you, a handful of your hair and his cock replacing the dildo. how he wishes he could hear your screams and pleads for more. to see your body shake with intense pleasure and glisten with sweat. to see your knees bruise from the hardwood floor.

the more he thinks, the more he throbs. he adjusts and shifts in his seat for the nth time in a row. his hand grips and pinches his thigh as an attempt to calm himself down. he feels hot and wants nothing more than to loosen his tie and unbutton his shirt (maybe use said tie to bound your hands behind your back whilst he fucks you)

his phone buzzes in his pocket several times. he takes it out and unlocks it, revealing the treats you’ve sent him.

pictures and videos of you naked and in lewd positions. driving the dildo in and out of your hole, teasing your nipples and looking so perfect; too perfect for hyunjin's liking. 

hyunjin [8:49]: you're a menace..

yn [8:50]: please come home. i need you 🥺

“fuck.” he mumbles before stowing his phone back in his pocket and standing up.

“i'm terribly sorry but i have to leave. family emergency.”

and with that, hyunjin leaves the meeting room in a rush. his only goal is to get to you – even if it means getting an earful from the boss tomorrow.

[caotictimmy]

This is going to be a long and important rant. Trigger warning for SA,Grooming, incest. Proshipping and stuff like that

I can’t believe I have to fucking say this. The problem tumbler has with normalizing and platforming proshippers and just incel ppl in general is disgusting. IF YOUR A PROSHIPPER, SUPPORT PRO SHIPPERS. GET THE FUCK OFF OF MY FUCKING PAGE. APPERENTLY I have to say this since I’m in the genshin and mouthwashing fandom. I was looking at one of my comments that had a weird name. I clicked on their account and they just reposted a lot of sissy content. I personally don’t like it but if it doesn’t involve anything disgusting like incest or rape I don’t care. But then I saw them repost smut of Percy Jackson. A GOD DAMN CHILD. I do not care if he is aged up. It is still gross and predatory. Especially if written by an adult. I get it if it was written by a minor. When I was younger I use to read stuff like that. But if you are a grown adult writing smut over a child no matter if you “aged” them up, you are a predator.

But back to the account. When I checked their following. The amount of proshipping accounts I saw almost made me throw up. The funny thing is the amount of whining and temper tantrums these people have.” WAHH WAHH THEY TOOK DOWN THE PROSHIPPING POLLS OF INCEST AND PEDOPHILIA PROSHIPS WAHH WAHH CURSE YOU SPAM REPORTERS.” I do not feel bad when these get taken down. Apparently this is a hot take. I fully support spam reporting incest, pedo and general proshipping stuff like that. I don’t care if it’s a rambling post or a full fledge fanfic. I don’t care if it’s character x character or x reader. I will happily report it with no guilt. “B-but t-they/I-I spent so long w-w-writing that.” DONT CAREEEEEE. Cause it’s not like this stuff doesn’t have an affect on people. When I was younger I use to read this stuff, that was how I thought relationships were supposed to be. Which ended up letting me get groomed by multiple people multiple times.

This stuff DOES AFFECT PEOPLE. This stuff being able to be put out and supported is harmful. You don’t even have to be a minor for this stuff to twist your views on relationships. There was this one person in that one persons following. I think their name was like proshipscara. One of their post was talking about “you don’t have to defend yourself for being a proshipper” their right you don’t. Because you are a disgusting person and NO defending can save your case.

And also before you brain dead basement dwelling defunked things go cry about “it’s a trauma response!” That does NOT make it ok whatsoever. It’s like saying it’s ok to scream and blow up on people, hit people, because it’s a trauma response. If this is helping your trauma which I highly doubt it. Keep this shit to yourself. Cause the amount of minors groomed into this is genuinely so sad. That probably my biggest reason why I hate pro shippers so much. Being a victim of it myself.

Please speak out about this, don’t just repost this or other anti proshipper posts. SPEAK UP. You can speak up about your hate for proshippers, speak up about the affects that happened. SPEAK UP! Cause this is a rampant problem. You can also help without speaking up. Report and block any proship accounts. Even if they don’t call themselves proshippers. If you see them posting incest, grooming, SA, in a positive light, report and block them.

Anyways thanks if you read all this I hope you have a good day! And if any proshippers wanna go cry in my comments or try and harrase me. Just try I’d love the good laugh.

[art-that-fucks-you-up-tournament]

welcome to the 'art that fucks you up' tournament!

have you ever seen a painting and though to yourself, "wow this makes me want to viscerally tear into a family of four"? or maybe gazing upon the stained glass of a church building and thinking, "god is not real but i am if only for this single moment"?

then this bracket is for you!

we're accepting nearly any form of visual art, but primarily sticking to stuff like paintings and the like. loom banners are cool!! engravings are awesome!! stained glass? even better! that being said, feel free to submit statues and modern art stuff because if we're running a poll about art that fucks you up, it would be absolutely criminal to stick to just those.

(and yes. we do accept statues and paintings of people in the nude. just stay away from sending us real life photos of people having sex and claiming it's art. technically it kind of is, but we're not accepting those submissions. i reserve the right to refuse a submission.)

unfortunately, we will not be accepting fanart. i know there are some fantastic pieces of art made by people on this website for their fandoms, but we're not going to be accepting those :(

ALSO. if you are submitting art made by someone actively on tumblr, PLEASE ASK THEM FOR PERMISSION. technically, whilst making the polls, we would be reposting art which is usually against most artist's boundaries.

that being said, this is pretty free for all! send in some art, and let's get this show on the road!

submit through the askbox (off-anon so you can send in the image) and explain what the art makes you feel and (if possible) why. does that painting makes you want to run your hand through a slow moving flow of magma? tell us! PROVIDE A SOURCE OR IT WON'T COUNT.

we'll see how large the bracket will be once we start getting submissions, but given that this isn't really fandom-open it probably won't get too popular. (that doesn't mean you shouldn't participate with lessened fervor though!)

inspired by: @poetrysmackdown and @notanothersongaboutlovebracket!!

[terriblebicho]

The whole situation with the "most annoying tumblr user poll" thing is pissing me off a bit.

So they put somewhat popular blogs that get reblogged too often I guess against guy that constantly reblogs from actual nazis, (according to people in the notes, though I don't know who it is)an actual nazi, the child slavery reddit reposter, a pedophile and fuck knows what else, but everyone has mentioned it already because it's just so stupid it almost looks like deliberate ragebait.

But the thing that's the most fucked up is like, the complete disregard. There is no way the OP "couldn't have known" Sivi/tonysopranobignaturals would be negatively affected by being included in the poll. She was very open about her mental health in her blog and it would've taken a quick scroll to realize putting her in a poll that gives strangers a platform to spread rumors about her and judge her behind her back would be extremely fucked up. The OP of the poll said they got some submissions via ask but they never posted any of them so ¿?. And even if one wanted to give them the benefit of the doubt or they went like "heyyy I'm just doing what people tell me, I'm not choosing the participants, I'm just writing what was in the asks", shouldn't you as the organizer like, at the absolute least, run a background check for each "participant" to make sure you don´t accidentally drive harrassment towards someone in a vulnerable state? or idk, ask them about it?

Also it's not like once someone reaches a certain follower count they automatically stop being people, holy fuck.

Also the comment section was a hellpit.

"actually its the ppl complaining abt this poll who r annoyign. let ppl have fun", "actually the nazis in the poll aren't that bad this is the most annoying user poll and the nazis dont really bother me personally". Hey <3 what the actual fuck is wrong with you.

[imyourbratzdoll]

𝒂 𝒔𝒑𝒆𝒄𝒊𝒂𝒍 𝒄𝒉𝒓𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒎𝒂𝒔 𝒎𝒆𝒔𝒔𝒂𝒈𝒆 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒚𝒐𝒖

🎄christmas masterlist🎄

hello, the christmas gang have come back to leave a special message for you. I will be holding a poll for your answers to go to. I hope you missed them as much as I did.

warning - slight angst, swearing, troublemaker elves.

the gif and headers I use aren't mine.

Warnings and Reminders - Please do not plagiarise, copy, repost/republish, adapt, or translate any of my work on any social media platforms, apps, or third-party sites. The only platforms I post my work on are: Tumblr and Wattpad. I do not own any character of any franchise (Marvel etc.) All my works are fiction and may be dark or triggering content: READ ALL WARNINGS BEFORE PROCEEDING.

Rustling can be heard as the camera moves, shaky figures can be seen through the lens as it’s currently recording. The faint sound of a woman can be heard as she adjusts it, setting it up completely so that it rests on the floor in front of the fireplace. As the woman steps back, the faces and people become clearer.

There stands Mrs Claus (you) and Ari holding their two children as the elves and their children (with Mrs Claus) surround them and face the camera. Smiles and tears grace their features as it feels like years since they’ve talked to you (followers). The heartfelt moment only lasts a second as one elf steps forward, arms wide as he yells.

“We’re back bitches!” The other elves follow, and Ari shakes his head, glaring softly down at the little troublemaker.

“Johnny! Could you let us have a cute moment for once?” Johnny shakes his head shrugging, he walks forward and gets up close to the camera, grinning.

“Did you miss us? Boy, do we have some things to tell you!” He grunts as he’s pushed aside. “Hey!”

Jake sticks his tongue out before facing the camera. “Hi! I missed you so much! It’s been so boring since the last time we saw each other!” He throws his head back, groaning. Ignoring the rest of the others as he takes up the camera before a certain elf makes his way over and pouts, giving him his best puppy dog eyes. “Okay, okay! You don’t gotta look at me like that. Here!”

Steve grins, coming into view and presses his face right up close to the camera. “Hi!” His words come out smooshed, “Missed so much!” He hugs the camera as if you are there. “Oh, I gotta go for a second to let you have some time with the others! Bye!” He waves and grins, skipping off. 

Ransom stands, adjusting his coat. “We already know you missed me the most.” He rolls his eyes. “I bet you have been bored, waiting for me to appear. It’s understandable.” Without a goodbye, he walks off and let’s the next elf appear.

Frank appears and smiles, giving a small wave. “Hi! It’s been so long! I hope you are doing well!”

Lee steps in front of Frank, glaring at the camera. “Did they bring food? What’s the point of me saying hello if no one brought me food?” You shake your head, smiling, rocking your son back and forth. 

“Lee. Be nice, people like you and don’t ask me why. I wouldn’t know, but they do.” Lee turns and looks at you, offended. “I love you, sweetie. Completely different thing.”

Lee turns back toward the camera and continues to glare. “Well, if you came here because you ‘like’ me, then I guess I can talk to you. But, next time. I’d prefer food.” He rubs his chubby belly and waddles off. Probably in search of some donuts.

Curtis steps into frame, a dirty beanie on his head and a frown on his face. “Great, you’re back. Now we have to entertain.” He rolls his eyes, not happy with interacting with humans.

Lloyd makes his way over and pushes Curtis, smirking when the other grumpy elf glares at him. “Hello, my peasants!” 

“Fucking hell, Lloyd. They are not your peasants, if anything, you’re theirs.” Ari facepalms, wondering how you convinced him to keep them. 

“Pfft, me a peasant? Please, maybe when hell freezes over.” He strokes his moustache, imagining what it would be like if hell actually froze over and he got his wish. 

Ari shakes his head, “okay, move along. Move along.” His hand scoops across the floor, moving the small elf along with a soft push and then his full attention is on the camera. “Hello friend!” He warmly greets, sending the screen a wide grin. “We have missed you, the year has been rough without you. I personally hope you enjoy this Christmas special we have made.” A small giggle escapes his daughter in his arms, catching his attention and he smiles, pinching her cheeks softly. Her hands come up to play with his greying beard. 

You smile, tickling your daughter’s feet before paying attention to your little boy. “You missed a lot while we were gone.” You look up, smiling sadly (because they missed you) at the camera. “As you can see, we’ve been blessed with more of these little munchkins. But there is more news…” You are interrupted by the door opening and a sheepish Bucky walks in.

“Sorry, sorry. I didn’t want to be late, there was a thing with the Who’s and then the elves spotted a lolly shop.” He rolls his eyes, remembering what hell that was. “I hope I’m not too late?” He continues to walk over, holding his baby boy in one arm. He leans down and pecks your forehead, giving Ari a nod.

“You’re not late, you are just in time.” You beam up at him before looking back at the camera. “As you can see, Bucky has grown a lot.” He huffs, pouting down at you. “Oh.” Your eyes widened, “Did you say that the elves spotted a lolly shop?” You looked back up at Bucky with a bewildered expression. “Crap… They will be running a muck right now.” You begin to chew on your bottom lip, hoping they aren’t wrecking the house too much.

Ari leans over and kisses your head. “Don’t worry, my love. I have them handled.” You breathe a sigh of relief as you realise, he’s used his magic before anything could be damaged.

“Thank god.” You look back at the camera. “So sorry about that. As you may have heard, we have some new elves, but they are not ready to be fully introduced to you, yet. They are definitely…” You think, trying to find the right word.

“Pieces of shit!” Lee grunts as he enters the room again with a mouth full of food. “Don’ know why we even need them! Got us.” 

Ari stares down at the small elf. “Lee, language. Also, you guys barely do any work, I have to literally bribe you so I can have presents done by Christmas.” He grumbles, pinching the bridge of his nose. 

A scoff can be heard, and Ari’s attention turns toward Lloyd. “Please, we do so much work, I think we should be getting a raise with how much work we actually do.” He strokes his moustache, staring up at Ari, raising a brow as if challenging him. “What are you gonna do, big guy? Step on me.”

“Don’t push it.” Ari mumbles, sighing softly when you reach over and rub his back. “Shall we put the kids to bed before continuing, my love?” You nod, telling the elves to behave as you gather all the children with the help of Ari and Bucky, and exit the room. 

Lloyd grins evilly toward the camera. “Oh, Stevieeee. Look, there’s pretty lights over there.” Lee and Curtis join in, watching the giddy elf sparkle with excitement. 

“Where?!” Jake and Frank shake their heads, trying to warn Steve to not fall for it. Ransom stands behind them all with a glare on his face, ready to seek revenge if they hurt his secret (not so secret) best friend. Steve wanders forward, heading toward the direction the grumps pointed towards. “Oh cool!” Steve exclaims as he opens the little door before a short shout escapes him when he’s pulled in by the sugar crazed elves. “Ah!”

Jake and Frank glare, “What the hell?! Why’d you do that?!” They try to run forward to help, but Lee and Curtis block them.

Lloyd shrugs. “I don’t know, I was bored and he’s so gullible.” All five of the elves noses scrunch when the smell of fire reaches their nostrils. “The hell is that?” 

They turn and their eyes widen when they spot Ransom next to a pile of the three elves favourite things on fire. Lee’s chocolate stash, Lloyd’s polos and Curtis’s beanies. “Whoops, I guess my finger slipped.” He stares down the three, allowing Jake and Frank to quickly retrieve Steve from the other elves, his hair all dishevelled and eyes sad. 

“There were no lights…” He pouts, Steve walks over to Ransom and stands next to him, watching the pretty flames. “Ooo, those are pretty.” He gives his best friend a smile.

You, Ari and Bucky enter the room again and you stop. “Ransom… Why is there a fire on the floor?”

Ransom shrugs. “Revenge.” You nod, ignoring it and heading toward the couch and taking a seat, both Bucky and Ari taking a seat beside you while the elves head over and begin to crawl up your body, finding their favourite spots to sit.

“Okay, we are back! We would like to thank you for being a part of our story, this has been a great journey for us, and we’ve been talking.” You look around you at the people who surround you. “How would you feel if we made Christmas a year long thing? Just for you.” You and the rest of the Christmas gang hold your breaths, awaiting the answer.

💌your answer💌

thank you for reading!

feedback and reblogs are greatly appreciated.

[redbirdandbluebird23]

Would people be interested in me posting the alternative start/set-up for The Kids of Yesterday? It's about ~350 words of set-up for how I could have played the story.

Kids is getting close to 10k hits on Ao3 and I want to do something to celebrate!

(reposting because I fucked up the timer on the poll)

[l3viat8an]

Nsfw content MDNI (repost!)

Honestly thought I reposted this one already- oops- CW: mildly dubious consent (not really but just in case!) Levi being mean and fucking you and using his tail, then being really soft in the end cuz I’m a simp-

Dom Levi <3

Who drags you back to his room already muttering under his breath, “Filthy fucking whore.” all because you spent the day with Asmo out shopping and having a spa day~

Getting to his room and he pushes you inside, closing the door and saying one word “Strip.” you look at Levi shocked, he’s rarely this bold after all- Levi sees that you haven’t moved yet and his eyes meet yours, “Did you not fucking hear me? I said strip.” you blink, still a bit shocked but start stripping “Yes sir.”

Levi’s eyes follow your every move as you pull your top off.

You can tell Levi’s even more upset then you thought because his demon form comes out as he strips, his tail swaying behind him as he gets closer to you, pulling your body against his and kissing you.

His tongue slipping into your mouth, only breaking the kiss when you need air, “You couldn’t even wait for me-” Levi’s grumbles, kissing ‘n nipping his way down your neck, biting a little harder and leaving a mark right above your shoulder. “-So you have to flirt and practically eye fuck Asmo over dinner!! You slut!” Levi snaps, pushing you so you’re bent over the cold edge of his bathtub bed, ass up, ”Levi I wasn’t-“ “Shut up!” Levi snaps again, his tail tip suddenly slipping into your mouth as Levi lines his cock up with your hole, “Just shut up and do the only thing you’re good for. taking my cock~”

And he sinks his cock into you, groaning out “F-fucking hell, how is a whore like you so tight?” All you can do is moan a bit around his tail that’s still in your mouth and rolling over your tongue “I bet you’re not even thinking about me right now!! You’re probably thinking or Asmo! Bet you wish it was him fucking you like the slut you are!” you try to shake your head but really can’t as tears poll in your eyes.

Levi’s pace is brutal as he fucks you, never shutting up calling you every filthy name he can think of “Bitches like you, just need to be fucked dumb huh? Isn’t that right?” you moan around Levi’s tail and involuntarily clench around his cock, “Ha! You really are a slut! Getting off on b-being called a bitch~? S-shit d-do that again~”

You can tell Levi’s getting closer as he starts whining a bit a muttering under his breath “S-shit need you to- damnit-“ pulling his tail from your mouth and your mouth falls open in another moan. As Levi’s tail slides down your body and to your clit. The very tip of his tail flicking your clit “Listen to me slut, you’re going to cum with me got it?” you whine but can’t form words. Levi bends over your back his lips right by your ear, gently nipping your earlobe. “I said, got it?” His tail speeds up and you cry out “G-got it! Y-yes Levi!” “That’s it, just like a good little bitch. go on then, cum. Cum now!”

and how could you not, with the way his tail moves and his cock feels inside you. You practically scream his name as you cum and you can feel Levi’s cum filling you up.

Levi stays bent over you for a minute panting while you both come back down to hell lol

Levi’s mind clears first and he gently gets off of you pulling out and watching his cum spill out “Whoa….oh!! O-oh uhhh MC? A-are you okay?!” you groggily turn and look at Levi “Bit sore.” you groan and Levi scrambled to get you into his bed and more comfortable, “I-I’m sorry!! I let my envy get the better of me!!- b-but you did s-so good and I-I- don’t think you’re a slut or anything I said!!” Levi peppers light kisses over your body and back up to your lips, before softly kissing them, “I’ll get us something to clean up with. You just uhhh stay here…..” You let out a little laugh “Believe me, I’m not going anywhere.”