#random commentary man ily come back to me

[spiked-mall-goth]

i quote this every damn day and i just realized that me and my brothers are in fact the only people that have seen this and it’s not like a big meme or anything.

[jeosey]

jendo fic ft. nico rosberg drabble fic i been cooking days before :p might make a part 2 if i have enough creative juices (adhd mind shift thru multitude of ships)

(i got inspired by the suits edit at tiktok and ofc jendo fics in ao3 ily!!! 🥹) plz enjoy this 2k words random thots!!!

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Jenson leaned against the wall, a relaxed smile on his face as he watched the younger drivers—his mind drifting to one in particular.

Lando was chatting animatedly with some engineers nearby, his laughter infectious, and Jenson couldn’t help but admire the way the young driver carried himself, full of energy and life.

"Isn’t he a little young for you?"

Nico quipped, breaking Jenson’s trance. The teasing glint in Nico’s eyes made Jenson’s stomach twist.

"Last night he told me I was the perfect age," Jenson replied, a playful glint in his eye, trying to sound nonchalant, but a hint of defensiveness crept into his voice.

Nico snorted, crossing his arms. "Perfect age to be his father, maybe."

Jenson rolled his eyes, but a faint blush crept up his neck. “When are you going to understand, they all want a daddy, Nico.”

Nico rolled his eyes, but there was a hint of curiosity in his gaze, shaking his head.

“You’re really leaning into this, aren’t you?”

“Leaning into what?” Jenson defended, but the heat in his cheeks betrayed him.

The truth was, he felt a bit like a pervert for being so drawn to Lando, for enjoying the way the younger man looked at him with those bright, eager eyes. But Lando seemed to revel in Jenson’s more sleezy daring side, the way he could command attention and push boundaries.

“Oh, come on,” Nico said, nudging Jenson playfully. “You know you’re a bit of a slag. And he’s eating it up.”

Jenson shot Nico a warning glance, but a smug sleezy grin broke through.

“He’s into it, alright? It’s a bit of banter—he knows how to push my buttons, and I love giving it back. It’s all part of the thrill.”

Nico watched him with an amused expression. “I have nevee seen you like this, even before your past relationships. Just be careful, Jenson. You don’t want to cross a line you can’t uncross.”

But Jenson wasn’t worried about crossing lines—he was worried about the shame that sometimes washed over him when he thought about what they had.

A knot of insecurity twisted in Jenson’s stomach as he reflected on his own fading relevance, the years of racing behind him replaced with interviews and dreaded commentaries of races beside Danica Patrick. He couldn’t shake the fear that he wasn’t enough—that Lando, with his striking looks and effortless charm, would one day turn his back on Jenson for a younger, fitter driver who could still steal the spotlight.

The thought gnawed at him, a constant reminder of the gap between them, leaving Jenson to wonder if he could ever truly hold onto someone so vibrant and alive.

[sportyclown]

how sawamura, miyuki, yuki, and kuramochi text (friends + s/os)

will most likely do a part 2 with more boys at a later date! these got freakishly long because i am, at my core, a very mad. also might revisit as i get re-familiar with the characters, i just had this idea floating around in my head. also the way these got pro

sawamura eijun

no matter who he texts, it’s always extremely extra. not only does he always give more information than you asked for – ex. if you text him wya? he will give you a play by play of his entire route or something

 he also uses tons of emoticons. and yes I do mean emoticons, baby boy has a flip phone. ifhe does eventually get a smart phone, then this boy overuses tf out of emojis. he’s the sort of person that sees someone use a combination of emojis he likes and then tries to copy them, but uses it completely incorrectly, but its v cute.

if you send him a meme, he will respond with an unnecessary amount of hahas. 

when he’s texting his lil bae, they’re always on his mind so he ofc texts them every thought that comes to his mind! when he sees something that reminds him of you, he won’t hesitate to share it with you. 

if you have been together for a long time, then we will definitely text you words of affirmation and be very honest/blunt about how he feels about you. he’s also always sure to ask you about your day - and he seriously cares. but i still i feel like with a s/o he would prefer facetime to texting just because he likes to see you :)

overall, a very adorable texter and his enthusiasm is just as contagious when texting as it is in person. he’s kind of clueless so he doesn’t pick up on subtext. so be blunt, just like he will be with you~

kuromochi youichi

my bias might be showing here, but I feel like he is one of the most well-adjusted boys in terms of being ready for a serious relationship tbh (at least post-high school). i mean we all saw that he regularly corresponded with wakana wish that were me lmao

i think he would most often use proper capitalization, but not to the point where he uses a period after every text

would send his friends news articles about his favorite fighting games where u like gaming or not

a meme fiend in general. the sort of person who uses reaction images of people he knows. (if you’re dating, he would still have a stash of funny pics/screenshots of you on ft, but he’d ofc only use them with you <3). his convos with his friends are rarely serious

 i don’t think he’d be the type to text haha out loud, but he does use LOL on occasion. with close friends/his lil bae he might send a voice memo of him laughing hysterically if you send him something REALLY funny. ugh my annoying king <3

unlike eijun he’s the king of being perceptive / picking up subtext. 

similarly, i do think he’s pretty reliable, but for friends i feel like he might make a lil bit of a stink lmao. like lets say a friend wants him to pick something up for them, he might play like he won’t do it then miraculously shows up with the requested item. its giving tsundere vibes on the low.

with his partner: i feel like he would use emojis when he’s trying to be ~cute~. i think with a established partner he’d be pretty flirty still but he’s v much whipped for his partner so its way more mushy than it would be early in the relationship.

yes your name has hearts/stars in his phone. mans is a SAP for you

his love language is more quality time imo, so I think he values time spent with you over texting time. so a lot of your texts might be asking you to come over to hang out / get a meal or vice versa

like eijun he wants to hear about YOU, and is very supportive and good at advice when he wants to be. he can be goofy but this is how he shows you he cares/sees you as more than a friend

he’s a blushy/shy boy with his s/o esp early in the relationship, so he might be hesitant or nervous to say “i love you” or anything like that outright, but you know anyway, which just makes the times when he does outright say it that much sweeter.

miyuki kazuya

i mean it goes without saying that this man is snarky. he’s not a meme king himself but he enjoys when people send them to him and will usually play off the meme to make his own jokes.

i feel like he also likes deep-fried memes or the very abstract, post-modern memes. miyuki is good at making other people laugh, but he has a generally very-off brand humor and the things that make him cackle hardest are either at someone else’s expense (very similar to kuramochi, so they bond a lot over that) or just indiscernible without access to a huge layer of context/background

saves the reaction photos kuramochi sends him, but doesn’t usually use them. but seeing an ugly pic of eijun yelling never fails to make him grin LMAO

i think he also texts A LOT about baseball, even more so than these other baseball dummies. texts his teammates a lot of articles he reads or clips from games/cool plays. this is mostly about texts, but in terms of social media I think miyuki uses twitter/instagram the most especially for baseball related reasons, while kuramochi uses snapchat the most. 

he probably texts a lot about baseball as well, both seriously and playfully

i can see him using hahas and LOLs in equal measure, but he would also utilize the haha reaction if he had an iphone. this boy does value his wit so he would definitely have commentary about any memes or jokes he’s sent

you won’t win a joke war against him, he will definitely one-up whatever you send him with either a one-liner or another joke. how tf does he do it?

definitely ignores people/conversations if he really wants to - but ofc he never does that to his BAE

if miyuki give you a dry one-line response...he’s not interested at all or he’s feeling frustrated about something else. but when he’s really happy? he will text his friends all the time and spam them! i see him as someone who enjoys texting when he has the attention span/state of mind for it. and when he’s texting his s/o his texting gets even more ~flavorful~

wit his lil bae: i don’t think miyuki would switch it up much w his s/o. is probably even more teasing with you over text than he is with his friends, which is saying something.

like talking with you just by nature of you being his partner. prob prefers texts to facetime because text kinda allows for maximum snark

he LIVES for you guys’ witty back and forth 

if he’s traveling for work or something, will definitely relish in you guys binge texting a tv show or something but just making funny commentary (or he’ll just send you funny commentary to get a reaction)

 he can dish it and he’s also not a super sensitive guy so he can take it tenfold from you as well. nothing y’all wouldn’t be used to when talking in person!

sometimes when texting him you’ll want to beat his a*s because he can be so cheeky but its endearing in a way. he definitely adds emojis to the end of his more annoying messages to give it that loveable vibe (and it works ofc, we love u miyuki)

he’s kinda clingy on the low so i think he’d prefer a partner that’s more open with their affection via text than he is. he would live for your random ilys or whatver throughout the day. also would not mind at all if you updated him on your actions throughout the day or sent him snaps - might not be able to respond to everything, but will react and appreciate it. very likely to make jokes about whatever you’re doing.

would also apologize over text. he’s not always used to apologizing can be awkward about it, so text makes it easier for him.

he would use emojis w you in a joking/ironic way. would absolute use those dumb but genius emoji combinations

yuki tetsuya

i’m literally cracking up thinking about texting him. he is one of my ultimate baes but im sorry i just know he texts dry asf. but its part of his charm!

has a flip phone. either never upgrades or gets the chunkiest most basic android if he is forced to

the thing is this man thinks that he is infusing all his texts with, like, tajin level seasoning, when in reality its pepper

uses punctuation. always. exclamation marks are used sparingly to express excitement.

but i can’t get the image out of my head of an upset tetsuya texting you a simple angry emoji (or the angry emoticon >:( LOL) if he’s reeeeeeally mad. but its v cute i can’t take him seriously. i just want to give him a hug <3

 but you know what he is so PASSIONATE about whatever he’s talking about that his passion bleeds into his text through sheer quantity of words and depth of thought. ultimately, all his conversations end up being extremely flavorful in terms of content. he is surprisingly good at having deep conversations over text.

he’s better at holding conversations with more extroverted personalities, truthfully.

he’s another one who sends random things to people when he thinks about them. miyuki of course gets so many texts/thoughts about shogi. if you get a random haiku, poem, or quote from testu, that means you’re blessed enough to be in his inner circle! he definitely thought of you when he read it and and wants you to respond!

with bae: he doesn’t really change up his texting style tbh, but he has a stronger outward reaction to what YOU text in response.

definitely the type to smile almost imperceptibly at his phone as he texts you, even if you send him something like “hey i’m at the store, want anything?”

he’s not great as verbal affection early in the relationship, so you’ll have to discern his love/affection. however baby boy is NOT afraid to just straight up say he loves you, he does it all the time and early.

he’s KNOWN for being reliable and responsible, so he will be at your beck and call when he’s able to for anything you need, but his heart is also warmed by the thought of you reciprocating that care. if your texts show him you’re thinking of him just like he does too. he’s very gentle and sweet, and checks up on you when he’s able to see if you need anything at all.

he might be reliable, but that doesn’t mean that he’s the quickest guy to respond to texts. he’s a busy guy, and he doesn’t think about his phone all the time, but he will always get back to you (bae does not play when it comes to completing things).

if they came up with a shogi game for gamepidgeon and tetsu had an iphone, your phone probably would be spammed with requests for games lol.

this is my first time doing headcanons like this so please let me know what you think or give me tips on how to improve! I really enjoying thinking about it so I hope to do more in the future <3

[tirednotflirting]

happy prompt to cut in with the angsty ones! a rewind on bachelor host ashton when he was still hosting, of michael and luke watching the show and giving commentary? no pairing I guess, just guys being bros watching reality tv together

hey meghna ily. and i hope this is what you meant kfdlsjfkls <3

this is dumb and very silly but vaguely includes one of my favorite non-couple story lines that happened on Bachelor in Paradise. 

also this is a prequel of sorts to this

also here it is on ao3 bc why not

“What’s the drinking game rule with the bartender guy? Jack?”

“Okay so anytime Alex, remember that’s the guy in the purple shorts there, starts flirting with Jack, you have to take a sip. You take another any time Jack is ignoring another person trying to ask for a drink to flirt back,” Luke explains while pointing at the men he references before taking two sips from his wine glass.

“Jesus Christ,” Michael groans before lifting his can to take the sips as well. “These two alone are going to get me wasted and one of them isn’t even a contestant. Why did I let you talk me into this?”

Luke drops a piece of popcorn into his mouth and smiles at Michael’s entirely fake glare. “Because you love spending time with me and I love trash TV.”

“It’s definitely for the wine and snacks but just keep telling yourself that.”

Their attention drifts back to the screen then as the theme song for this week’s episode of Love in Paradise starts playing. It’s some corny intro sequence, this version of the reality show much more self aware than the other iterations that play throughout the year. Michael and Luke laugh at the silly poses and actions this season’s cast have picked to do and throw in random comments about different people as they pop up on the screen.

Luke loves Saturday reality TV night with Michael. Loves that he has a friend willing to watch week old episodes of Luke’s favorite show just to spend time with him. He had been worried when he took this night job that he started recently that he would lose contact with all of his friends that worked and went about their lives during normal times. Though he supposes that Michael doesn’t exactly go about his life during normal hours despite working during the day. Honestly he avoids ever thinking about it too hard because then he gets worried about whether or not Michael is sleeping at all, really. And Michael hid all of his hair-ties last time Luke called Michael’s mom worried about his health.

Luke’s pondering his best friend’s sleep schedule still when the theme song is wrapping up, the final person shown before the show’s title being their ridiculously good looking host. Luke really prides himself generally on not having too much of a crush on TV personality but ever since he got stuck on this show after watching the previous few seasons on Hulu with the girl who works the graveyard shift with him at the hospital, he’s been drooling over Ashton Irwin. Honestly, it’s a damn shame that Ashton is the host rather than the lead on the show. That would get Luke to sign up to be a contestant in a heartbeat and him and Michael both agree that Luke would make excellent TV on a program like this.

“You know,” Michael says while grabbing a handful of popcorn. “They’re totally only bringing this Niall guy on so they can make all of us swoon over him before breaking his heart and making him the lead on the next season. There’s no way that him and Harry make it to the end of this thing.”

Luke takes another sip of his wine while making a disappointed sound. “See that’s what I think they’re doing with this Alex situation.” He gestures toward the screen where Alex is once again batting his lashes at Jack. (Which prompts Michael to groan before taking another sip. This week’s drinking game really wasn’t messing around.)

“Like I’m telling you there is no way they would give up having Jack as the bartender, he’s fucking hilarious. Plus then we get a whole run of promo ads for the next season with Alex’s pouty face. Which, hate to break it to you, dude, is much cuter than Niall’s.”

“Take that back, Niall is adorable.”

Luke raises his hands in surrender. “Not saying he isn’t cute. Just saying he’s not as cute.”

Michael shakes his head. “Goddamn, what are you turning me into?”

They watch for a while with minimal comments back and forth. Jamie and Damon get into a fight over what he decides to eat for breakfast (he’s spent the season attempting to convince her he’s a vegan and she caught him red-handed with both bacon and cheese). Harry and Niall write songs for each other on the beach (“musicians have the best break-ups there is no way that’s not what’s going to happen, Luke”). Luke continues to make heart-eyes every time Ashton Irwin comes on screen to welcome a new contestant to the beach house or to address the audience about the structure of the show. Michael suggests that they make a drinking game rule for every time Luke zones out when Ashton comes on screen shirtless. Luke blushes and flips him off.

The episode is winding down, and Luke and Michael are slumped against the back of the couch (very well wine drunk at this point in the two hour episode) when an ad from the network sounds out providing details on how to sign up to be a contestant or how to nominate someone for the next season. 

“Hey,” Michael starts, his head rolling to the side to meet Luke’s eyes. “we should sign each other up for the show. That way I can actually meet a man and you can attempt to swoon the host. Their ratings would go nuts if a contestant rode off into the sunset with that god of a man.”

“As if either of us would ever have the energy to be a TV personality,” Luke scoffs. “Like everyone on this is totally expected to be an influencer once it’s all over and I just don’t think I could stand myself if my job was to try to get people to buy essential oils and supplements.”

Michael laughs as he stands to collect their empty glasses and snack bowls while the preview for next week’s episode plays. “Just saying, man, like with this new schedule you’ve got, what are the odds you’re able to date anyone?”

Luke rolls his eyes, though if he’s being honest, it’s definitely something he’s been thinking about. “Whatever, that’s a problem for another day. Now, what are your official finale predictions? Because I’m willing to literally put money down on a dramatic scene of Jack and Alex calling whatever they have off, sunset in the background and that new Selena Gomez song playing before camera cuts and they announce the new lead.”

Michael marches back into the living room and throws a $20 bill down on the coffee table. “Harry and Niall make it all the way to the overnight date before Harry gives some shit like ‘the music just isn’t there anymore’ and then they play that new Julia Michaels song while Niall cries.”

“Deal.”

*

[whence-the-woody]

Finale commentary under the cut

So I wanted to kind of liveblog as I was watching but held back so these are my remembered reactions/second watch reactions

Bummed there was no song recap but quickly figured itd play at the end

PUPPY. Best part of the ep, lbr, Dean was so cute with him

Theyre really doing a cheesey life montage huh - still not clear whether monsters are a thing in this new world?

I was watching the mins tick by during this first montage like OKAY we get it, cheesey happy home life, move along. There was only 40 mins left of the whole show like get on with it, it went way too long 

We definately needed to restablished that Sam is neat while Dean is messy. Totally necessary to spend time on that. Also didnt Dean get houseproud when they moved into the bunker?? What happened to that?

OMG get on with it

Then becomes apparent that hunting is still a thing. Which if so what was the point of showing then doing fucking laundry and dishes while “Ordinary life” plays - if its not just an ordinary life?

At this point i thought it might go the route of them being listless without hunting as a job but then murder scene so I guess not

This whole pie sequence is stupid and a waste of time, we all know it

Dean being a cold, heartless bitch about everyone being dead. Aces. Not unexpected but still just great. How dare you be so happy about pie fuck you dude. 

DOES ANYONE REMEMBER EILEEN

Pie is the face is not funny my dudes come the fuck on

I started skipping through during the murder scene. I was bored. Like, I dont care about tension building to the murder of a family we dont fucking know. Ive always skipped these scenes, what is the damn point. Its not scary or interesting. 

GET ON WITH IT

Same old FBI bullshit. Nice to see the journal again I guess. But like, this is STILL what we’re doing? In the very last ep? Same old, different day, just like 15 years ago. Really?

Singer and Kripke. Subtle. 

I skipped through the interrogation too. I dont find the scary brother act cool or entertaining 

15 mins in and nothing has happened

Theyre trying so hard to give Dean jokes and nothing is landing, its so cringe just stop

The way the little clown faces pop up - if that supposed to be scary? Really? Its all just so silly rn

Watching it again I realise just how easy this hunt is. The answer is in the journal. They find the exact family. They find the exact barn. The kids are just stood in a cupboard. This is what takes Dean out, really? Its not even a normal hunt, its a way too fucking easy one. 

I do not remember this chick or what ep she was in, maybe theres some parallell or foreshadowing by bringing her back but if there is I dont get it

Bottom line if youre gonna bring people back WHY THE FUCK THIS RANDOM GIRL

I knew so fast he was gonna go out like that. Hanging from a fucking nail

I kept saying out loud not like this, no way, this is so stupid, its so stupid omg

I paused and tried to talk myself into putting aside how stupid and awkward it was for him to be doing this scene hanging off a pole and just try to invest in the emotion of the speech. Which I achieved at times

but why was is so awkward tho?? Just the way hes stood pressed against it is fucking weird. Also 1000% Sam couldve gotten help and he wouldve been FINE. It took so long for them to talk, an ambulance couldve been there before they were done, there was no need for this

Okay the speech did make me cry once I pep talked myself into being invested. The reference to being scared Sam would reject him, the I love you so much, Sam saying dont leave me, the stay with me and tell me its okay - all those moments got me and I did cry. I appreciated the family business line. I liked Jensen telling Jared he always keeps fighting, that was a nice reference. 

BUT there were also those moments that made me scoff, roll my eyes or laugh. The whole “always you and me” bullshit especially. The second I knew he was going to say I’ll be in your heart I yelled at them to no do it, I hate that cheesey move, then literally was like “oh my god, he did it”. It WAS NOT always going to end like this - so much of the last 15 years was proving him wrong about that. This is all just so wrong, it is not good. 

Jensen and Jared did a good job with what they were given in this scene but my god

The audacity of the Cas erasure- always you and me. FUCK YOU. 

I laughed out loud when his last shot was a One Perfect Tear. I was literally like “Oh wow they did that”

DEAN DESERVED A BETTER DEATH

It also kinda loses all impact when you see him like 2 mins later

MIRACLE IS THE REAL MVP ILY

Theyre really doing another montage. Really. Like we get it, hes sad, we didnt need the toast to understand that

Omg Miracle by his side. The best of bois. 

Looking around his room like beer and guns was all dean was. Sure. Aces. 

I choose to believe Bon Jovi was a ref to before Dean went to hell

If Donna is back why isnt anyone else?!?

Oh Jared you look so old bby. Go home. He looks older there then later in the ridiculous make up

Why is that shot made to look like hes leaving the bunker forever?? Like that makes no sense

Bobby greeting him is nice and all BUT IT SHOULDVE BEEN CAS

Also they are 1000% doing the show don’t tell by having Bobby just sit and explain everything. SO FUCKING LAZY

Cas has been out of the empty, helping rebuild heaven. Okay, fine. Even Dean’s reaction to hearing that was fine. BUT YOU ASK WHERE YOUR FUCKING BEST FRIEND IS AND GO SEE HIM. WHO IS THIS VERSION OF DEAN WTF

I know people are upset Cas is back working in heaven but I dont think its anything like before. It sounds like he helped fixed things then got his own heaven. Also he’s God’s Dad, hes not serving God, hes teaching him. I know human Cas done right is what we wanted but I dont hate this for him. BUT WE SHOULD HAVE FUCKING SEEN IT. 

Why is a memory of being a kid with his Dad what Dean is reminiscing on. They have literally reverted him back to s1. There are so many memories dean should be thinking about in fucking heaven

Hes going for a drive

Hes going for a motherfucking drive

In the car he was just in

WHY THE FUCK IS HE ACTING LIKE HE HASNT SEEN BABY IN YEARS WHAT IS THIS SHIT

Hes going to drive around doing nothing until Sam gets there are you fucking kidding me. Not going to see any of his family from the last 15 years, just driving. Absolute horseshit. 

This is the moment where you realise that this episode has changed NOTHING. This is the same ending as the last ep except theyre in heaven not on earth

ITS THE EXACT SAME FUCKING THING

Okay so they skip over how Sam went from going on a hunt to walking with a toddler. OMG how unsubtle that they have literally just labelled the child Dean in big yellow letters. I couldnt help but laugh, how fucking stupid. 

I did get a bit teary when the music started I’ll be honest. But mostly through the whole montage (ANOTHER ONE) I was saying to myself This is so fucking stupid. omg this is dumb, what the fuck is this, so stupid.

They literally did a montage so long they had to play the song twice. Im just done at this point wow. 

The old man make up is so bad I just laughed. The only pictures being of the 4 of them, reinforcing the Winchester only bullshit, great. Not even pics of this new random family Sam’s got. The painfully cliche Dad moments for Sam, again so bad its funny. Omg the hand on the head of this random kid, this is so ridiculous. Old man sam in his bad wig trying so hard to move like hes old and crying in the impala. Wtf is happening, this is SO STUPID 

I thought theyd cast a more attractive son I’ll be honest. So he has the tattoo - are they a hunting family? Because that would go against both s1 Sam they’ve tried to go back to and the s15 Sam they build up to for all those years

I know they were going for an emotional parallel with that “you can go now” but this random man saying it to Sam in that make up, with the music cue lined up right there - its just funny coz its so dumb im sorry

I cant believe they actually played another different version, I’ll never get over that

Theres alot of things I’ll never get over

Is this bridge supposed to mean something? They shouldve picked a setting that meant something

I know theyre trying so hard to make Dean look happy and peaceful to convince us its a good ending but sis no

I laughed out loud when Dean turned around - WHAT IS THAT OUTFIT SAM?

Really, they have nothing to say? No questions, no convo? They just have cheesey smiles and look over the water? This is so wrapped up in a fucking bow trying to force us to feel good my god

The cut almost immediately to them talking to the camera, still in character getup, was so cringe I yelled and turned it off

And they pan out to literally none of the people we want to see . Great, Good. 

LITERALLY WHAT WAS THE POINT