#quit apologies for shit that doesn't harm others

[respectthepetty]

I don't care what anyone says!

City of Stars is a good show!

This man said this with his full chest directly into the microphone.

Say it louder for the bitches in the back!

[deceptive-daydreams]

TW: mentions of bad mental health

im imagining eddie being absolutley taken back when he finds out how people have previously treated you resulting in hesitation when being vulnerable with him.

and he's been through some shit, he's not exactly one to be voluntarily vulnerable either but with the tables turned it's like a moment of oh. like you're hiding from him, muddling your own emotions as a means to keep the peace.

he realizes that coming in strong, asking "what's wrong?" almost too oboxiously like he's previously done, only chases you further into your mind, it only insinuates that there are consquences if you were to answer so rather than being met with honesty, it's always "nothing" followed by forced smiles and sucked back tears that he's regrettably brushed off in those moments, trying to keep you comfortable. but while his intention to ease your chaotic mind by simply moving on had no ill intent, he soon recognizes the harm its caused and the pattern he's assisted in creating.

realizes he takes it far too personal when you shut down on those particularily bad days, thinks it's cause of him, only to contribute to the self destruction taking place in your mind when he continuously begs the questions "what's wrong?" "what do you want me to do?" "what can I do?" "come on, tell me what's wrong". he never understood that he was never the issue but he quickly made himself into one by nearly berating and prodding you with his questions. and then one day he sees it. sees the way your eyes go dull when he asks.

sees the front you put on, "everything's okay" while your lip wobbles. he doesn't take it personal this time, there's nothing distracting him from the obvious signs, the symptoms of broken hearted individual struggling to keep up despite the aches and pains that linger within. its a heartbreak he's so familiar with yet seems to be so blind to in others, thinking he's the only one to experience it, not selfishly but hopefully. so he straightens up and silently tells himself to quit all of his bitching because this is bigger than him, it's not because of him. you need him and he's been too insecure to think that maybe words aren't required, not by you anyway. there is no quick fix, no remedy to just stop the pain like popping an ibprofen or slapping on a bandaid, it just is. raw pain and vulnerability that should be allowed to be felt, not cured.

so this time, he recognizes the wall you put up, just like every other time though it was previously ignored. before he can even say anything, he knows you're anticipating his bombarding questions that have no answer. sees the way you tense up, the slight panic in the way your fingers tremble at the prospect of being figured out. except this time he speaks softly, a shake in his voice because he's terrifed to scare you off once again. says "i love you" then gently wraps you up in his arms, provides a barrier between you and the world you're at war with.

holds you on the kitchen floor, face pressed to his chest with a mixture of tears and snot.

runs his fingers down your spine delicately.

whispers "it's okay" when he knows it is in fact not, only hoping you're able to decipher that he means it's okay that you're not okay, it's okay that it's 1AM and while the world is asleep you're both tangled up on top of crumbs and possible neglected coffee stains

apologizes.

because for all those times you've coaxed him through an unwarranted episode, he's been neglecting you at your worst. not on purpose but it's neglect nontheless. and he knows all about it.

sings under his breath when the sobs have stopped wreaking havoc on your body. quiet hums of a familiar song, you are my sunshine.

tucks you into bed, makes you a late night snack cause he knows your appetite fails you in times like these, kisses your forehead and threads his fingers through your hair.

he's not perfect nor has he ever desired being held to such a high standard. but for you he wants to try.

[purplesannnieee]

Lay All Your Love On Me

A/n: Currently, I'm caught up on all the ep in tdb, though I still haven't got Jiro's personality, so I heavily apologize if I do him wrong @sunncat! This literally doesn't help either bc I haven't watched Demon Slayer, so I don't fully know Shinobu other than some vids I watched from Tik Tok 💀. I hope you enjoy this though! And I really do apologize for when you read this, it isn't how you thought it would go TT (I also apologize the fact that it's a bit rushed(?)), 1.4k words, somewhat grammar checked, or technically partially proof read? goodnight cheese

summary: as a second year at darkwick academy, you used to be under vagastrom before transferring to mortkranken for unknown reasons. while yuri's glad that it isn't just him and jiro who are ghouls, jiro's rather curious to why specifically mortkranken. warnings: mentions of death, erm, fem!reader that's similar to shinobu kocho, shawty, I don't know shit about anything medical, so to whomever reads this that is way more of an expert in this, I'm so sorry, if I potentially make you pissed in any way, mentions of self-harm(through poison), reader makes jiro's heart go boom boom boom boom boom (i hope someone gets what i'm referring to), oh, and vague ahh mention of alan, I think jiro might be a lil bit ooc, yeah, he is, mf be peeking a lil bit, but more out of admiration than erm, nasty boy thought reasons, oh fuck, this is a bit angsty, whoops, poor yuri's a bit traumatized

Life always managed to piss you off. You used to express it too, though not anymore really. You truly did enjoy your stay at Vagastrom, however, you had your reasons as to why you transferred to Mortkranken. Despite the captain hoping you would open up, you wouldn't budge. This was something you would rather keep to yourself. Well, if only that stupid Masterpiece News, whoever it was, decided to leak about your sister dying from the Clash. Despite wanting to murder whoever did it, you figured that would be for another time. For now, you were more focused on finding a way to kill the bastard that killed your sister in the first place.

Before you knew it, class had ended. Admittedly, despite being in the same year as both Yuri and Jiro, you didn't always share the same classes with them. Well, it's not like you could do much about that. You did have different goals from them after all. Granted, while you had the same effort and energy for yours just like Yuri's, you considered it more noble than yours. And for the most part, he didn't seem to care much about it.

Well, maybe not upfront. However, instead, Jiro would ask you as the two of you would sometimes walk to class from Mortkranken's dormitory. "Y/n, Yuri wants to see us," Jiro said, as you looked up to the taller male. You were inclined to not smile, but you simply nodded your head. "Where at?" You asked cheerfully, as you passed by some people. Some of them, whisper, confused as to how you could manage to be in the presence of "Frankenstein". Especially with some of your former house members, which you couldn't help but scoff. For a bunch of delinquents, were they seriously that scared of a rumor? Not that you remembered much of the clash, considering before it happened, you were cursed to fall asleep, the "Sleeping Beauty" curse as they called it, and while you weren't sure if you were actually kissed, nobody would talk about it, just that you were cured from it.

You even tried to get Yuri to tell you how you got cured, yet for someone who brags, he quite literally shut up about it. ". . . y/n?" Jiro asked as you snapped out of your thoughts. You hadn't realized how close the taller male was to your face until now, trying not to react much, before letting out a laugh. "Ah, sorry about that. Just some thinking," you mused, looking up at him. "Mind repeating where at again?" You asked as the taller male looked at you, before shrugging, "Back at the dormitory," he said, as you let out a "huh".

As the two of you were walking, Jiro looked at you, though you didn't pay attention much to it. While he wasn't as curious, he did recall Yuri wanting him to ask you your reasons as to why you switched to Mortkranken specifically. Granted, you were as great when it came to researching as your strength, which sometimes Yuri would ask you to help Jiro out; though that was for whenever there was an anomaly that needed to be captured. It was quite simple. Whenever there was a strong anomaly, you would infect it with poison through your katana, while Jiro would use his chainsaw.

Before you knew it, the two of you arrived at the dormitory, as you entered inside first. Looking around, you felt confused, noticing that Yuri wasn't there. "Is Yuri perhaps downstairs?" You asked as you turned around to look at Jiro. The taller man shrugged, before speaking. "No, he's still in class," he said blatantly, your eyes confused, though you still decided to politely smile at him. "So you lied to me…huh, I would've never expected that from you," you said, as you took a seat. You had to admit, that while you didn't know Jiro fully well, you were comfortable with him. Probably a bit more compared to Yuri, though you understood that Yuri had good intentions, even if he were well…prideful and arrogant.

Probably a bit more compared to Yuri, though you understood that Yuri had good intentions, even if he were well…prideful and arrogant. You watched Jiro as he looked at you, before nodding. "Yes," he said, as the corner of your smile twitched. How annoying. "What made you decide to do that?" Your question made him glance at you temporarily, as he grabbed a few tools. "Simple, I'm doing a health inspection. Yuri said it's been long overdue," he said, as you frowned, before sighing, as you decided not to fight over it.

You watched Jiro as he looked at you, before nodding. "Yes," he said, as the corner of your smile twitched. How annoying. "What made you decide to do that?" Your question made him glance at you temporarily, as he grabbed a few tools. "Simple, I'm doing a health inspection. Yuri said it's been long overdue," he said, as you frowned, before sighing, as you decided not to fight over it. "Ha ha ha ha! You're acting like a cat now," he laughed, as your eye slightly twitched. A cat? The thought of you being compared to a cat made you feel a bit more irritated, still trying to keep ahold of your emotions. "I'm not so sure about that," you let out a laugh, trying not to look affected. Jiro didn't say much, though he simply smiled, before stopping for a moment. "Ah, that reminds me. Could you change real quick?" He asked as you were close to snapping. Instead, you gave him a smile, agreeing, before waiting until he turned around before you turned around as well, changing out of your uniform.

While you were preoccupied with changing, Jiro wasn't the type to really peak. And yet, he was curious as to your body. Well, he supposed that thought would occur since he was the one that woke you up from the curse. Slowly, he glanced, admiring your body. It was rather smooth compared to his, though to be fair, you seemed like the type to take care of yourself. And yet, you seemed a bit more frail than when he first met you. Your personality truly did have changed from the past two years the more that he thought of it.

Noticing you were almost done changing, he looked away, curious as to why out of all houses to transfer to, why Mortkranken? "Alright, let's get this over with," you said, as you watched him take out a few tools. He took out a stethoscope, checking your heart rate. "Heart rate, 80 bpm," he noted, before grabbing a pressure gauge. He placed it inside your arm, checking it. "Blood pressure, 89/59," he said to himself, noting that as well. Before you knew it, he did a few things, before finishing, as he placed the tools away.

"Have you been consuming Foxglove?" For once since being in Mortkranken, a shocked gaze appeared in your eyes, gazing in his red eyes. You were confused at first before it finally connected. "Is this why you wanted to do a health check on me?" You asked, dropping your smile. You had to admit, you hadn't expected for Jiro to figure it out. Though then again, his knowledge was in some ways greater than yours; which didn't surprise you as much. "So you did," he stared at you, before frowning. "There isn't any reason for you to. Seems like at least you took small pieces, but it's affecting your health," he said, as the corner of your lips turned down.

"That's none of your fucking business," you said, before hearing Jiro beginning to laugh. The fact that he laughed was both confusing, infuriating, and yet beautiful, actually, you were going to stop yourself from there. "I missed that bluntness," Jiro said, managing to calm himself, as he smiled at you. Before you knew it, you could feel your face turn red, scoffing. "Shut up! You're being awfully weird now," you turned your face away from him. You didn't like how you could feel your heart beating fast, as you could feel cold hands on your face, before gently looking back now at Jiro.

While you wouldn't admit it, if you were asked who out of all the students at Darkwick was pretty, Jiro would honestly be the only one you would think of. "Y/n, I may not know why you're deciding to poison yourself. But, whatever problems you're facing, please, don't. In fact, lay all your love on me," he said, as you could feel his face closer to yours. ". . . May I kiss you?" He asked, before being toppled down on the ground, as you kissed him. You let go for a moment, looking at him. "I'll be Frankenstein's girlfriend," you said before the two of you kissed. Unfortunately, neither of you heard Yuri's steps. "The two of you! Go kiss somewhere else!" He screamed, a bit horrified, as the two of you stopped to look at him, before laughing, leaving the captain more frustrated, as the two of you eventually went to your room. Unfortunately, both of you had to go back for Jiro's medication.

[shellforbrains]

okay, strap in, here we go.

i think i & a lot of other people went into Apology Tour expecting Stolas to be at different point in his character development then he actually is. but that development is definitely still coming!

a deep dive into where Stolas currently is at character wise with insights from my own personal life experience.

in this deep dive into where he currently is, i want to use what i personally have experienced & witnessed in my own life as a guide. bc if i'm being honest, after i had time to mull it over, looking at Stolas in this episode was both like looking in a mirror & also like looking at some of my own family members who i have tried to correct on their own microaggresions in the past.

now i want to preface this by saying that i am white. i will not be speaking on this from the perspective of a POC. i am speaking on this from the perspective of someone who has had to go on a similar (but obvs not as extreme) journey that Stolas is on, and as someone who has seen people i love vehemently deny their problematic actions when i have tried to tell them how harmful they are & how hard it is to actually argue with them about it.

and i'd also like to add that i am not trying to shit on Stolas with this & say that Blitzø did nothing wrong in their arrangement ever or in Apology Tour. Blitzø is also on a character arc of his own & growing as a character.

both he AND Stolas continued to suck at communicating this episode, & it wasn't anyone's sole fault there. i'm focusing less on their conflict (though of course i will make reference to it) & more focusing on where Stolas currently is in his journey & how him acting the way he does in AT is... not far off from reality, honestly.

even if it's painful to watch at times, i do have to commend the writing there haha. bc it's pretty fuckin' spot on.

okay with all that out of the way, let's get our hands dirty:

the description of the episode itself confirms that Stolas is "still not quite being self-aware enough at times" & boy did they hit the nail on the head here lmao.

i think most people will agree that Stolas still has a LOT to learn about the race/class difference & the power imbalance between he & Blitzø, but even still, some were expecting better out of him in AT than what we got. myself included.

but let's look at FM from his perspective:

he's off his meds & obviously went into that night with a very black & white view of the possible outcomes: either Blitzø returns his feelings & they'll be dating by the end of the night, or he's been keeping Blitzø against his will & is a monster. no room for shades of grey.

and when Blitzø (understandably for multiple reasons) mistakes this basically out of nowhere declaration of feelings as a form of rp, Stolas (very understandably) gets his feelings hurt. he shuts down & stonewalls.

he doesn't see any shades of grey when Blitzø chases after him, says he needs a minute to think, makes reference to his feelings being played with, or the fact that, while aggressive, Blitzø was trying to talk things out with him. Stolas only hears the yelling and (again, understandably) gets triggered.

ALONG WITH, it seems, only hearing the "everything you've put me through, you rich, privileged asshole" comment & the "treat me like one of your butler imps" comment. which, if i'm being honest, i think ALSO really hurt his feelings, based on how he ends up acting the next day in AT.

here's where my personal experience comes in, so let's tldr my story real fast:

i was raised in a fairly privileged position & was basically brainwashed into far right ideology from a young age at the private school i attended. trust me, i went on a WILDASS journey to unlearn some of the craziest & most vile shit that had been hammered into my head since i was a little tiny child. it's a tough journey, too, that's filled with a lot of ups & downs.

part of what makes Stolas such a special character to me is seeing that journey reflected on screen with the good, the bad, & the ugly. which is also why i get very frustrated with fans that want to ignore the bad & the ugly parts of Stolas' character & journey.

bc, yes, while he is a fictional character, it is always important to hold oneself accountable. even though i am a completely changed person from who i was all those years ago, i know that even at 33 there are probably things i still need to unlearn that i just haven't stumbled upon to challenge me yet.

the journey that Stolas is on is not a single switch flip or a short, easy one. nor should it be treated as one. however, i think it's important to dive into these things and see where it's coming from, even if it shines light on the bad & the ugly in a way that some people may not like.

now with my personal experience in mind, & how Full Moon went from Stolas' perspective, let's finally address that painful exchange that happens the morning after Full Moon.

emotions are still high, neither of them has had time to really process, Stolas is still very deep in his own feefees, and those feefees are HURT.

Blitzø, in his mind, has rejected a relationship with him. as well as accused him of being a racist/classist, something that Stolas does NOT see himself as. and, like ANY privileged person mostly oblivious to their own behavior, he gets his feefees hurt over this as well as getting very defensive about it.

while the bar is quite literally in hell, Stolas DOES treat imps... better than other Goetia. that doesn't mean he treats them WELL, bc he DOESN'T, but to Stolas himself, he sees other goetia carry imps around in purses like animals or throw them around like objects like Stella did. in his mind, he's treating imps very well! so he must think, "so why would Blitzø or that Stiker guy even say anything like that?! that's ridiculous & hurtful!"

enter stage left Blitzø, who starts off with his typical sexy talk which then turns into needling/arguing. (once again, oof. they both continue to suck at communicating this ep so hard.)

and when this exchange happens, it is... it is so quintessential oblivious privileged person getting defensive.

"i'm not racist/classist! when have i EVER done something like that? you talk just like those people that hate all white/rich people!"

i have literally heard basically those exact words, and ones similar to what Stolas says later, from family that i have tried to point out microaggresions to before.

microaggresions are called microaggresions for a reason & are obviously not considered the same as the more outwardly hateful shit for a reason. they are harder for people to realize that they are doing/participating in and therefore very easy to get their feefees hurt over & defensive about.

bc the ppl committing microaggresions hear the big, ""scary"" words like "racism" or "classism" & think of the most extreme examples, not the ""mundane"" shit that THEY do. so if someone says they're being racist/classist, they think they're being accused of the extreme shit & think people are being absolutely ridiculous.

bc OBVIOUSLY Stolas isn't carrying an imp around in a purse or yeeting them like Stella does so what's the big deal, right? /s

moving forward in their exchange, we come to these lines. and here's where, if i haven't ruffled feathers already, i'm probably going to ruffle them now.

by saying this, Stolas DOES make a point but also... DOESN'T at the same time, ending up only reinforcing his own ignorance & lack of self-awareness. but before anyone starts furiously typing to me, let me explain.

Blitzø DOES need to hear this to begin to understand how Stolas has been making attempts & does care in his own way, just like how Blitzø also needed to hear what Fizz said in Oops for the same reason.

HOWEVER, just like how Fizz said what he said in Oops without full context of the arrangement that Blitzø & Stolas had, Stolas says what he says here without the full context of his actions & how they actually read to Blitzø, especially in the context of the deal they had.

he is genuine about his attempt to make Blitzø understand he cares, but just like before, this is ALSO quintessential privileged person being defensive.

"if i were racist/classist why would i want to date a POC/a poor person? if i were racist/classist why would i want to be seen with a POC/a poor person? if i were racist/classist why would i want to spend time with a POC/a poor person or support them?"

yes, Stolas cares about Blitzø. but this is called being seen as an Exception or One Of The Good Ones. Stolas doesn't look down on Blitzø as much as he does other imps, but that doesn't make Blitzø feel any better. and even still, while Blitzø is the Exception, it still doesn't mean that he isn't still looked down on or been the victim of microaggresions from Stolas.

and honestly, some of the talk i've seen these past few days around the fandom regarding this has been... very fucking exhausting.

yes, i more than anyone understand that Stolas is not self-aware enough to fully realize his own behaviors yet. but everyone seems to be putting this entirely on Blitzø's shoulders to fix & educate Stolas on this despite the fact that Blitzø is also hurting & neck deep in his emotions as well.

Stolas gets a pass for being ignorant & uneducated & neck deep in his feelings but Blitzø is apparently supposed to be able to articulate perfectly to Stolas every microaggresion he's suffered & be able to sit him down & give him a lecture on Hell's Racism & Classism.

just like how it is not the job of POC to educate white people, or any other underprivileged group to educate a privileged one, it is NOT entirely on Blitzø's shoulders to educate Stolas.

Stolas is approx. 36 years old & has a smartphone. Google (or i guess it's gaggle in hell) exists & Stolas shows later on in AT that he DOES indeed have tiny blips of self-awareness, little nagging feelings that he's missing something.

yes, it would definitely HELP to have Blitzø explain his own perspective to Stolas, as i'm sure Stolas would be willing to listen if Blitzø can find a way to properly elaborate. and i do think Blitzø WILL at some point in the future do that!

BUT. confronting or educating loved ones is SO much harder than anyone else. i think part of the reason WHY Blitzø has a hard time saying specifics to Stolas (besides his own self-hatred & communication issues) is BECAUSE he cares about him so much.

it was not easy at ALL for me to try to confront loved ones in my life about their behavior, & being met with the defensive reactions only made it more painful on top of that. it is not uncommon at all for ppl to let a privileged loved one get away with things that they would NEVER let someone else get away with.

this leads into where i basically want to say... if you're having any worry or doubts about Stolas' character arc right now, don't worry. we've gotten some pretty clear signs from AT that there's still plenty to be addressed on Stolas' side & that it WILL be coming.

he simply is just not as far along in the journey as some of us thought he was, & that's okay. he'll get there, even if it is painful right now.

personally, my biggest theory on HOW he'll get there is the whole "Stolas is stripped of his title & everything he owns" theory that's been circulating around the fandom. something that drastic happening to him, leaving him with nothing, & forcing him to see what Hell is actually like for the lower class outside of his gilded cage would be one hell of a wake up call for him.

but even if that theory isn't correct, i still believe that it will not just be solely Blitzø or others around him showing Stolas the error of his ways.

i am of the opinion that something drastic will happen that will also help shift his view much more into focus & make him even more receptive to what he's being told about the racism & classism of Hell.

bc oftentimes, it DOES take something drastic in a journey like this one to actually light a fire under one's ass. what that will be for Stolas...? well, i guess we'll just have to wait & see!

[xjulixred45x]

Y'know I see a lot of yanplatonic, what about... Just yan? 😩👀

Mephisto, Lucifer, and Amaimon?

:0

(if you have to choose a species, half demon, but it'd be cool if you don't specify either 🩵.)

Okay!(I'll do for separete bc You didn't specify so)

Yandere Mephisto Pheles/ Lucifer/Amaimon x Reader: general Headcanons

Genre: Headcanons

Reader: neutral

Warnings: YANDERE BEHAVIOR, OBSESIVE BEHAVIOR, OVERPROTECTION, UNHEALTY MINDSET, WILLING READER IN SOME CASES, CONTROL FREAK LUCIFER, KIND OF DELUSIONAL AMAIMON, MEPHISTO IS A WARNING BY HIMSELF. i think it's all.

Mephisto Pheles

This is going to sound like an unpopular opinion, but Mephisto seems WORSE to me than Lucifer AND Amaimon.

simply because he does not take his partner seriously even if it is voluntary. Be it demon, human, half demon, etc.

Let me explain myself better.

Mephisto gives me vibes of a flamboyant, possessive and quite jealous yandere.

As much as he finds humans interesting, it is not the same as being on their side or wanting to protect them. They are all the same to him.

so his darling would have to stand out in some way, and it can be in any way, whether it be being a pure soul among the other exorcists (like Yuri in a way) or even being someone very dedicated to exorcism, who is not afraid to say how much they hates demons, how much they HATES them, and above all they are not afraid of him despite the great difference in power between the two.

THAT interests Mephisto, it is something fresh, something GENUINELY interesting that he would like to investigate, SOMETHING NEW.

SOMETHING HE CAN KEEP AND HAVE FOR HIMSELF.

I think he is one of those who generate an obsession the fastest (first there is Amaimon) but he acts quite quickly when they capture his interest.

He tries to be a gentleman and thus learn more about his victim i mean Darling , and thus he realizes that they are better than he thought, his tendencies worsening considerably.

quite a few gifts, which become more personal regardless of whether the darling accepts or rejects them.

He also shamelessly makes Darling spend time with him even during work hours, be it bringing him something to his office (when his servant can do it), making him take their breaks in HIS office drinking tea (having awkward conversations , What fun).

or watching from afar their missions to 1- make sure Darling is okay 2- watch his sweetheart work and 3- kill in a "subtle" way anyone who sees too close or has already tried to hurt Darling.

He definitely stalks darlings in dog form, or even rubs against them so they can pamper him that way (it works sometimes because they don't realize it's him).

When it comes to the escorting (kidnapping) part to his house, Mephisto acts as if he is dealing with a terrified pet and not a living being that wants to leave.

He is quite condescending and although he is somewhat patient at first, his patience runs out quite quickly.

His punishments are more on the psychological side, mostly using his manipulation of time.

for example, trapping darling in a loop until they apologize, making them relive a particularly traumatic moment, etc.

Mephisto doesn't harm them physically, but he has no problem destroying their minds.

If Darling were a volunteer, things would be slightly better, no punishments and more freedom to go out, but he would really still be a jealous clingy.

Mephisto would continue giving many gifts, especially clothes that he would like to see Darling in (German clothes, with a theme similar to his, anime, etc.)

If Darling behaves enough, he takes them out for a walk around the academy or to his amusement park! after all he likes it when they have fun with him.

He's a piece of shit, he demands physical contact, he won't take NO for an answer (although sometimes he tricks you with the dog form to get it).

There is no way Darling can get out or ask for help, since they would have to ask for help from Lucifer or several of his brothers to have ONE CHANCE to escape (aside from the fact that they can't even leave the palace without MEPHISTO HIMSELF with them).

Just have to say...good luck with it.

Lucifer

Ah, our favorite control freak.

He seems like a better option than Mephisto to me for the simple fact that at the very least he DOES CARE that darling wants him, he cares about what THEY want even if he is a selfish piece of shit who is willing to keep them away from the world JUST so that HE can be happy.

At least he's honest with that.

He is an obsessive yandere, somewhat delusional, overprotective, etc.

I think it would take him longer than Amaimon and Mephisto to fall in love with someone.

and I honestly like the scenario that he becomes obsessed with someone and constantly watches over them.

At first he tries to rationalize that it is for the good of the infiltration mission.

but inconveniently he ends up noticing things about darling's everyday life that resonate.

ends up accumulating all possible information about them, what they like, what they don't, allergies, past, friends, enemies (people to kill), etc.

For Lucifer, watching Darling live their life is like an escape from his own life with constant pain, living his days through theirs.

and that ends up generating a certain feeling of affection, appreciation, love.

which quickly becomes obsessive when he realizes that they could be attacked or DIE at any moment if they remain vulnerable.

and imagine EVERY possible way for this to happen.

So he decides that the best way to keep Darling safe is to have them with the Illuminati.

The kidnapping is probably carried out by either Shima or Homare and in the quickest/gentlest way possible. If Darling ended up with unnecessary lacerations I can assure you that Lucifer would take care of the "problem" without thinking :)

As for the "adjustment period" after that, Lucifer is quite patient, more than one would expect.

As delulu as he is, he knows that "changing the environment" is a stressful situation and he justifies Darling's initial actions in that way, the shouting, attacking the staff, trying to leave his room, everything is justifiable to him.

(They already say that love makes you blind... In Lucifer Case, Blind AND deaf af)

Lucifer gives Darling a rank in the Illuminati, just below his own, and all possible privileges within the ship. but it still has the clear restriction of, well, not running away.

His punishments fall more into the realm of removing privileges and isolation, it does not reach the level of Mephisto, but isolation definitely leaves its consequences and removing privileges leaves Darling even worse than before.

Lucifer demands to spend time with darling, things like them accompanying him on his stretcher when he can't move, taking walks around the base, reading together, "going out" to private places just the two of them.

I can definitely see him as touch-starved, but with how sick he is he can only do that when he's stable enough to stand, so rest assured that when that happens, he'll be attached to darling like a bug.

If Darling behaves, they will be pampered as if it were their birthday, Lucifer will meet certain demands such as books, materials for hobbies (art, writing, crafts, etc.), perhaps a pet, periodic departures from the ship with him or Homare, etc. .

His darling is more likely to have Stockholm syndrome, he treats them very lovingly and at the same time rebukes any hint of seeking their freedom, so it is understandable.

Just follow the rules, don't go outside the lines, and your new life will be minimal, manageable, and at best. easy. Just don push your luck and let Lucifer "love" You as it's do.

Amaimon

my favorite of the demon brothers. So sorry if i extend myself on this one

Amaimon is interesting, because he is the one who would become interested in someone the fastest. but it does not mean that it would be something positive from the beginning.

We already know that he only looks at people strong enough to give him a good fight, so it would be quite normal to expect that from his Darling.

someone who can kick his butt, hurt his pride, etc. or even a member of the Shiemihaza family tree.

DARLING HAS TO BE SOMEONE STRONG. OTHERWISE, THEY DOESN'T HAVE MANY CHANCES OF EVEN SURVIVING AMAIMON.

not because he has the possibility of intentionally killing darling, but rather unintentionally 😅

Either way, this person catches Amaimon's interest and at first he HATES THEM.

not only because of his wounded pride, but because he generally can't stand being interested in someone he considers inferior.

and even worse, HE WANTS TO SEE THEM AGAIN.

It's like love hate at first 😅

Amaimon will demand a fight with darling and will not leave until he is satisfied, which could lead to an interesting series of draws.

and little by little Amaimon can decipher what he really FEELS about Darling.

either by himself asking Mephisto about it.

Either way, he realizes that he doesn't really hate Darling, on the contrary.

partly he wants them close.

He wants to be the only one they fight with.

with whom they make jokes, with whom they talk.

HE WANTS TO BE THE ONLY ONE.

But at the same time he thinks it would be boring to just lock them in one place and never change, or worse, have them hate him now that he finally has something like a "friend"/"love interest."

so Amaimon resigns himself to isolating Darling from the others. He is surprisingly calculating at that.

He has no problem killing and getting rid of Darling's friends, family, and companions if it means spending time with him.

If Darling somehow realized that Amaimon is the one who is disappearing his loved ones, maybe they can manipulate him so that he doesn't do it and they simply stop seeing his family.

Amaimon in general is the ONLY one of the three that can be manipulated by darling, precisely because he only thinks about fighting, sweets and darling, in that order.

Also darling can bribe him with candy to leave them alone for a while, it works 9 times out of 10, the 10th time he will want to eat the candy WITH darling.

He's terrible with words unlike his brothers, and even his attempts to cheer up Darling seem like threats🤣 but he tries.

is the most likely to have a willing darling, because let's be honest, anyone else wouldn't want to fight Amaimon twice, so if someone fights Amaimon SEVERAL times it's because either 1- he's Rin or 2- he likes fighting him. to some extent.

Besides, like I said, he don't have to kidnap his darling because the charm of your relationship is that only HE can plague their time and fight with them whenever HE wants.

Amaimon simply has neither the patience nor the emotional intelligence to deal with an unwitting darling.

When they are both tired of fighting, they just talk nonsense about humans, life, eat sweets, etc. It's surprisingly nice.

God forbid someone tries to keep Darling away from Amaimon, he will make a blue night 2.0.

And he also doesn't tolerate being lied to, he can be very scary when he's angry.

It is the easiest way to "escape" from being kidnapped as is, rather under his constant threat of killing all your family and friends...

Darling's safest bet is to go with Mephisto, yes, as ironic as it may sound, but Amaimon is still afraid of his brother after all. so it would be useful to have him as an ally.

I would say that it is the easiest to handle and can even be pleasant, but that does not make it any less stressful and terrifying.

Don't let anyone see you, touch you, hit you, NOTHING... and everything will be fine.

not great, but good.

Shares, reblogs and comments are very welcome!

[cursedvibes]

The way people are focusing on "My fav Gojo is not racist, he's just ignorant" and "Gege really hates Gojo he made him racist" when it was not even the point of that interaction. The point was to educate and talk about some stereotypes about black people that are harmful to the community and, if you look into it I'm sure you'll find has it origins in slavery.

Besides, Gojo is privileged and comes from an old money family, and it looks like he isolatehimself from others. Of course, it's in character for him to say stupid things like that. Even if he strives for change.

Yeah, everyone is so pressed that their fave is being problematic (which honestly Gojo has always been, he's hardly a saint and he treats many people quite shitty like for example Utahime and Ijichi) that they miss the bigger picture of this. Given, I think there are better ways to get that point across, but the aim here was definitely not "look at what a uniquely bad person Gojo is, I want to make readers hate him" it's for readers to reflect upon themselves and their own biases, conscious or not. Gojo is often being a dick to people, Miguel included, but this wasn't it. He wasn't just being annoying as usual, he made a misinformed statement rooted in racism "black people are naturally stronger/tougher/more resistant" and he got told off for it, which actually led to him apologizing. He expresses bigoted views, that are quite common all around the world and can lead to real harm like for example medical discrimination, but people often don't question or even notice that they have these views. I think exactly because he's such a fan-favourite character, Miguel calling him out and Gojo admitting he said fucked up shit is important.

Gojo might make a trip to Kenya to meet Yuuta, but unsurprisingly doesn't have any real black acquaintances and the one black person he knows a little better doesn't like him because he treats him like shit, an expandable tool (given, Miguel did try to help someone do a genocide so it's not like him working to make up for that in principle is a problem, but Gojo is not just treating him badly because of that) and has dismissed him and his culture as a whole. Gojo's racism towards Miguel didn't come out of thin air with chapter 255.

No wonder Miguel wants him dead.

You could say Gojo's racism and ignorance got punished before as this powerful cursed tool he so casually dismisses here together with its history could have gotten him out of the box much earlier. If he hadn't gone out of his way to destroy part of Kenyian sorcerer's culture because of his fear that it might be used to hurt him, he might still be alive. This chapter the payback was just more direct, Miguel was given the space to push back and not just get beat up (making in the previous moment Gojo seem like the righteous cool guy, seen by how the fandom reacted to their fight) and he also didn't sugar-coat it and straight up said "you're being racist".

The fact that Gojo apologized, something quite rare for him, and didn't defend his uninformed views or mocked Miguel for questioning him also shows that a lot of this comes from unaddressed biases, irrational fears and having lived a sheltered life in terms of being exposed to other cultures (and actually valuing them) that influence his judgement. He's not trying to be maliciously racist, but he clearly doesn't know what he's talking about and why it is harmful. I don't think he revelled in destroying other people's culture, he was just driven by a base fear, but that doesn't make the harm he caused any better. He's never had any reason to engage with black people on a personal level and that has unsurprisingly led to some ignorant opinions about them. Again, a very common sentiment which Gege uses Gojo to highlight. This is clearly reflecting arguments and talking points Gege has heard themselves and tried to address here. I'm sure there are all kinds of wild racist takes about Miguel on Japanese social media, I know the English side has them plenty.

I think the message Gege wanted to send was executed a bit clunkily by for example still tying Miguel's CT to rhythm (replacing the inhumanly strong black guy stereotype with another common one) and putting the burden all on Miguel to educate the people around him. Similarly, having only one (explicit) black person in the manga who has to then explain anti-black racism to the reader makes it feel very forced. I think you could've avoided a lot of that and included these topics more dynamically by giving us more background on Miguel's technique and how he came to it and comparing it to cursed technique's of other Kenyan or African sorcerer's. Another option would be making Hakari for example Black-Asian (or Todo or Yaga). He has a darker skin tone than the other characters and differently textured hair (which would already lead to him having to face a bunch of bigotry in his everyday life) and he is hated by the conservative higher-ups. So actually do something with that and address it.

Even Japanese people who are merely slightly tanned get harassed. Just being from Kyushu or Okinawa, somewhere where it's much warmer and sunnier and therefore not being as pale as the average person in e.g. Tokyo will get you plenty of derogatory comments, especially if you're a woman. That goes extra for indigenous people like the Ryukyuan or Ainu who not only face prejudice because of their appearance but also legal discrimination because of their origins and challenge the very popular notion that Japan only has one ethnic group and one language. Japan still struggles with a lot of racism internally against their own people, so you can imagine that it's even worse for anyone who newly immigrated or with parents who immigrated (in the best of times you will always be treated as a foreigner no matter how well you speak the language or integrate into the culture simply because you look "different"). It has gotten better in recent times, but it's still a problem, as Gege pointed out in this chapter.

Coming back to Hakari, we would also be able to see through him how jujutsu society treats black-identified Japanese sorcerers, which would be a different perspective from Miguel's who only visits Japan occasionally and mostly operated outside the system until Gojo came along. Black people aren't just something distant overseas, they are also Japanese citizens. You could show if and how jujutsu society differs from regular Japanese society. Most likely they are even more behind as they also discriminate against what kind of cursed technique you have (modern or one based on a long bloodline, which would automatically work against anyone not born in Japan and with a long family history there). You could also combine it with the transphobia Kirara faced and generally show how this system fails young sorcerers who don't conform to their norm.

But yeah, sorry Gojo is not perfect and will fall into the same stereotypical and bigoted thinking as many other people who rarely step outside their narrow homogenous social circle. Like you said, he's privileged with old money and family history who pride themselves on their bloodline. He's generally very narrow-minded about things that don't interest him or he sees as irrelevant like how he doesn't bother to understand Maki or has no problem ignoring a starving child on the road (who cares what happens to Hana, she's weak and Megumi is the strong one, he's who matters here and deserves to be lifted out of poverty) and international sorcerers fall under that as well. There are so little of them so it's okay to ignore them, why should he bother reaching out or informing himself about people abroad, he's never gonna interact with them anyway. If they get too dangerous for his taste, he's just gonna slap them around a bit and take away their sharp toys.

Honestly, I think what Gojo did previously is worse than what he said this chapter. He can learn to check his internalized racism and be more mindful of how he talks to Miguel or black people in general (he shows openness to criticism and improvement here), but he can't bring back Black Rope. It falls to Kenya's sorcerers to recreate it, which will take decades. They'll feel the impact of Gojo's actions long past his death, even when he can't say anything ignorant or racist anymore.

So I don't think this ruins his character, was done by Gege to make Gojo fans feel bad, or meant to keep anyone from liking him. He has character flaws and that is fine. He gets challenged on them and receives push back for them plenty in the story. I can understand that some fans feel bad reading the chapter, hearing Gojo regurgitate talking points they might've heard said against them as well, but it's not really Gege's fault for addressing this very common issue.

[l8rs-gat0rs]

You're legit the only Eva writer, so I have a cute, fluffy request of the girls helping Eva ask reader out because she's scared of being rejected. I love your work btw, i literally stalk you to make sure i didn't miss anything

The Golden Window

Pairing: Eva x Female reader

Warning(s): none, just Eva overthinking and gallons of fluff, quite a bit of y/n use at first. Sorry if the POV situation is weird, I couldn't get a solid gage of what the POV would be, this is the closest fit.

Summary: Eva turns to the girls for some help telling you that she likes you, but it doesn't go as planned...

Word count: 1.1k

WHAT THE HELLLL. I AM SO HONORED. I have an account stalker :') Ugh no but fr, you're so sweet and thank you so much, I'm always over the moon when people tell me that they like my writing, because it's something I'm genuinely passionate about and love to share. So I hope you like this one too :)It's a bit shorter than my usual fics. (I am so sorry for making you wait literal months for this oh gosh)

PSA: I am giving my editor a break so this is lowkey not edited as great as usual. I apologize if there are any mistakes😭

~~~~Happy Reading!~~~~

Eva sat at the kitchen table, nervously twiddling her fingers distractedly, staring at nothing.

"Eva...Eva!?"

Suddenly her attention snapped to the person in front of her, whose hands were waving in her face.

"Oh shit, sorry Cricket, what's up?" Eva said apologetically.

"What's on your mind? We're usually the ones who are all in our heads" Cricket chuckled.

Eva cringed at the thoughts currently going through her head.

They were all about you, of course.

come onnnn, spit it outttt Cricket urged.

"well... I like..." Eva sighed, she was usually the one helping the other girls with their emotions, but ironically she was struggling with her own emotions.

Cricket put her arm on Eva's shoulder

"Hey, it's alright" She said softly

"I like y/n." Eva said suddenly.

Eva stared into cricket's eyes for a moment as Cricket said nothing.

"Well, we all like y/n..." Cricket said.

"Cricket!" Eva slapped cricket's arm causing the other woman to laugh.

"I'm just fucking with you! okay okay so, what's the problem with that?" Cricket asked curiously.

"I-" Eva cut herself off, frustratedly running her hands through her hair.

"I'm scared to ask her out" she slapped her hands onto the table.

Cricket looked at her and held her chin in her hand as her elbow rested on the table.

"I think this is a job for the group" Cricket smiled.

...

"okay girls, I have gathered you all here today because-"

"Where is y/n?" Salem spoke up.

"I was just getting to that, if you would let me continue Salem" Cricket said with strained politeness.

"oh okay, sorry" Salem said sheepishly.

"As I was saying, I sent y/n out for some groceries because we need to help Eva with something. Cricket continued

all the girl's turned to stare at Eva, who blushed embarassingly.

"we are gonna help Eva here confess her feelings to y/n"

the girls gasped and Eva even heard one "I knew it!"

"okay okay, settle down!, settle down!" Cricket yelled over the women's voices, causing them to quiet down.

"Eva, you have the floor" Cricket continued when it was quiet once again.

Eva cleared her throat and addressed the girls.

"Alright guys so, as Cricket says, I have a crush on y/n... and it's eating me up inside that I don't know how to tell her because I'm scared she doesn't feel the same way."

a few "awwww"s were heard from the girls before Salem spoke up once again.

"I think you should do something big, like maybe buy her chocolates and flowers and leave a letter for her that tells her to go to the garden and then you tell her there" Salem said with a dreamy smile.

"um, no you idiot, y/n will hate that" Isis scowled at her.

"hey, Isis! Eva chided causing Isis to look back at her.

"that wasn't nice, Salem's idea was good" Eva scolded Isis

"apologize to her."

"fine. I'm sorry Salem" Isis rolled her eyes.

"I accept your apology, and forgive you for the harm you have caused" Salem responded tightly.

"Good, but that being said, Salem, even though your idea was good, I also don't think y/n would like that" Eva said gently.

"what if you did it during one of your sessions?" Audrey spoke up.

"No, I can't do that, the session are for you guys and your feelings, I'm not going to make it about my feelings." Eva shook her head.

"I think you should just flat out say it to her some time. Pull her to somewhere private and just speak your feelings to her. That's what you always teach us" Cricket spoke up from Eva's side, uncrossing her arms and placing a hand on Eva's shoulder.

Eva looked at her and smiled a little.

"yeah you're right. Fear is an emotion that I can persevere through as long as I speak my truth." Eva smiled.

"That's the spirit! Right girls!?" Cricket asked the girls sitting in front of them.

A chorus of "yeah!"s and "Yeah! just tell y/n you like her!" could be heard.

Suddenly there was a loud bang and all the girls were startled into silence as they turned to see what had made the noise.

There, standing in the arch leading into the living room was y/n, mouth agape, staring at Eva. She had dropped the bag of groceries she was carrying.

The silence that filled the room was deafening and Eva could practically hear the blood rushing through her body.

Eva was the first to speak up though.

"um, girls, can you uh..." Eva started

before she even finish her sentence, the girls were already quickly getting up and leaving the room. Cricket picked up the bag of groceries and finally left, Eva and you alone.

"Would you sit down please?" Eva said softly, gesturing to the couch.

you nodded and took a seat in front of her before she moved to sit next to you, causing you to turn towards her.

"how much did you hear?" Eva cringed.

you smiled a little,

"I heard enough. 'tell y/n you like her!'" you said in a teasing voice.

Eva put her face in her hands and groaned causing you to giggle a little before gently removing her hands from her face to see her red face.

you looked into her blue eyes that you always seemed to get lost in.

"hey, it's okay" you whispered gently.

Eva found herself getting lost in your warm brown eyes as well.

"it's just that... i don't know, I didn't expect to tell you this soon, I was going to plan it in my head" Eva explained, looking away, feeling embarrassed.

you were silent for a moment, and as Eva was about to turn her head back to you, you took the liberty of doing it yourself, grabbing her chin and connecting your lips to hers.

Eva was surprised at first, but quickly returned the kiss.

Once the two of you separated, you smiled brightly.

"Now are you ready to tell me?" you smirked.

Eva laughed before responding,

"yeah that definitely helps"

"well?" you urged her on.

"y/n, I like you" Eva said with a smile.

"I think you have my answer" you giggled.

"I don't know, I think I need your answer again" Eva said with faux confusion.

You laughed, causing her to do the same as you smacked her gently.

you kissed her once again, reveling in the feel of her soft pink lips that you could never seem to keep your eyes off of.

When you pulled away again, you pressed your forehead to hers and smiled.

"I like you too Eva"

[hanjisungfanboy]

My god, sorry to send you more nonsense but smut rot popped in my head while doing laundry.

SKZ and pillow humping. Who is more likely to do this while masturbating vs who would rather set their SKZOO on fire than put their junk and jizz on the nice, expensive, silk pillowcase they place their very clean face on every night?

Don't apologize!! I'll do this one before the list. <3

Mature content below! MDNI please. :)

Contains: masturbation, mentions of cum (and it's messy-), and a little bit of humor mixed in.

This is listed from oldest to youngest and not a scale of most to least likely. Please remember this is fiction! This post does not at all reflect how Stray Kids acts or thinks in real life and this is purely for entertainment. <3 No Leebits were harmed in the making of this post lmao

Chris

I feel like he wouldn't hump his pillow when he's in the right mindset. But when he gets desperate and really into his "personal time", he'll look for anything around him if his hand isn't enough. It would probably take a few minutes of masturbation for him to lose his rational thinking.

Afterwards, he panics and either cleans the living hell out of the pillowcase or throws it away out of embarrassment. Post-nut clarity really hits him hard after what he did to his poor and innocent pillow.

Minho

Yeah, probably not. In your words, he would rather set Leebit on fire- I feel like he is quite particular with his sleeping space. He doesn't want any leftover cum getting in his hair, y'know? That shit is sticky, and he isn't risking that.

Changbin

I think he low-key does not care lol. If he's feeling like humping the pillow and enjoying himself, he does. He just puts the dirty pillowcase in the laundry basket and moves on with his day/night.

Hyunjin

I feel like he is decently cleanly, and he doesn't want any leftover cum touching him. It would just lead to a harder morning if that shit got stuck in his hair. Sooo, he wouldn't choose to hump his pillow 9 times out of 10.

Han

Probably has multiple pillowcases just because of his tendency to hump his pillows. If he's having a week where he gets horny back-to-back, he's absolutely running through pillowcases. He just loves the way it feels too much. <3

Felix

He's not above it, but probably doesn't typically think about humping his pillow when he's horny. If he gets bored of his hand, sure. Probably does it a little more often after the first time though.

Seungmin

Oh, hell no. He wouldn't be able to stand the mess. He'll search for other solutions even if his brain tells him to hump the pillow like a dog in heat. His hand or a toy will do the trick.

Jeongin

I feel like he would be similar to Chris in this scenario (like father, like son- lol) but without the embarrassment afterwards. However, he probably wouldn't resort to humping his pillow most of the time, so it'd probably happen about every other month.

A/N: That's it! Sorry it's a little late. Had a personal issue going on yesterday. Hope you enjoyed! Let me know if I made any mistakes or forgot something. <3

[snailsrneat]

Stubbornly Hot-Headed

-----------------------------

Scenario:

Some people are really stubborn, but they pale in comparison to MC. Whose head is about as thick as a rock. Mix that with MC's anger issues, and we have a ticking time bomb. However only one person is able to reason with MC and that's their S/O.

-----------------------------

[OCTAVINELLE EDITION]

Azul Ashengrotto:

Azul is conflicted.

On hand he now has a third bodyguard, not that he particularly needs one.

But on the other hand, your constantly being hurt.

And on the other, other, hand you can cause a decline in his customers.

So he really is quite conflicted on your temperamental personality.

He did express these concerns to you after a lot of thought and anxiety.

And you do try your best to not be so quickly angered.

But when someone starts shit talking your boyfriend, you can only see red.

Everytime you get into a fight he makes sure to take care of your wounds whilst also lecturing you.

His favorite thing about you is probably your over protective and maybe even a bit possessive nature over him.

It has, on more than one occasion, made him blush as red as a tomato.

-----------------------------

Jade Leech:

Oh good heavens.

Your on your own with this my dude.

You shall never now a moment of peace in your life ever again.

Why? You might ask.

Well I'll tell you.

Because Jade is going to spend all if his free time studying you.

Testing your limits seeing just how far you can go before you become enraged by him.

But thus experiment was swiftly pushed aside when he realized the toll it had on your mental health.

Despite his very scary, often violent, and apathetic behavior he does hold some empathy for others.

Although this empathy is only given to a chosen few.

Once he comes to the realization he's hurting you he immediately stops what he's doing and begins to apologize and comfort you.

After that he does his best to never upset you too much ever again.

He doesn't ever shy away from a chance at teasing you though.

He doesn't particularly mind you fighting others all the time, he just doesn't want to deal with the repercussions of the fights.

Like the other student wanting to fight you again for example.

He deals with those who seek out a second beat down from you and gives them what they want.

Although I'd say a beat down from him is a lot more dangerous than one from you.

He loves that resting bitch face that you have. It truly compliments your caring personality towards the people you love.

-----------------------------

Floyd Leech:

Good luck my dude.

Because this man gives absolutely no fucks.

The moment he found out how much power he holds over you. You were done for.

He, like Jade, also loves to how far your patience with him can go before you start getting pissed off.

Turns out you don't get mad, you just cry.

Which is arguably worse in his opinion.

Once he found that out he makes sure never to take it too far.

Emphasis on too far becaIuse he's still gonna annoy you, that's just in his nature, but he won't go too far.

He prefers you to be laughing and or blushing not crying

If you get into a fight with another student he will gladly come fight with you.

A teacher will have to break up the fight because you and Floyd on the same team is very dangerous.

You both beat the shit out of everyone who dares to cross your paths.

If you get harmed during a fight he'll have Jade patch you up while he cuddles you from behind.

He finds your fighting face hot asf, and will often compliment you on it.

Which in turn makes you blush.

-----------------------------

[dearmyloveleys]

Times Ep 33 made me go (??) + some yaps about Ying Lei, Siheng, and Baijiu's.. if you've watched the last few episodes, you know what I'm referring to

apologies if this is on the neg/critical side but I'm rewatching it and there are things I picked up after emotions have subsided from the first time I watched it

spoilers!

Siheng died from... a torn arm? He literally got stabbed in the chest in Ep30 by Li Lun and disappeared into sparkles. I thought he was going to die in that Ep30 scene ngl

Since we're on Ep30, I get that Li Lun doesn't want to fatally harm Ying Lei. All his attacks are at Ying Lei's non-vital points, which checks out. And yet... Ying Lei... dies? The more I think about it the more I think that the writers don't want to villainize Li Lun completely, to justify his return and redemption in Ep 32/33. If Li Lun actually sent a clear, fatal blow, to Ying Lei, Ying Lei's death would have been more justified but at the cost of completely villainising Li Lun. The writers don't want that. So they go the non-fatal blow route and have Ying Lei die... from idk what, a stab through the shoulder and a few whips. Ying Lei dying for Baijiu checks out for his story arc, but the manner of his death could be done better. Then again, I'm thinking, the only other antagonist to mercilessly kill Ying Lei is WZY, but they need to save him for the boss battle. So it only leaves Li Lun to inflict the 'killing' blow beforehand. This said, I still cried a shit ton at his death scene.)

Back to Ep 33, the barrier at the mountain god temple: So ZYC can enter but not exit? If the barrier was truly made to protect WZY and has been erected since a while back, nobody should be able to cross it in the first place as a double assurance (no entrance, no exit)

And in Baijiu's flashback: It's telling us that the barrier has been set up since the time he was still hanging around in Chongwu Camp. Iirc didn't that second in command literally stand in that altar room in the first few episodes with WZY, and this is set I think after Baijiu has left Chongwu Camp?

Lol WZY waited an eternity for yuanyi to complete their soulmate conversation, with ZYC in his killing grasp. I know you're waiting for the reincarnation to complete the power up, but... you can still take the mortal route of snapping his neck right. He doesn't need ZYC as hostage. The classic scene of villain watches heroes deliberate whether to take action.

My issue isn't that the deaths of Ying Lei and Siheng weren't unjustified. In fact, I believe Ying Lei's death, though not needed per se, was earned in battle. He was always going to protect and bring back Bai Jiu no matter the cost. Siheng was always fated to die. He's already dead, he needs to be dead for Sijing to fully come back to reality. It's just the manner in which they have written their deaths doesn't quite hit the mark. It's only the sheer talent of the actors that pulled the punches.

And of course we can't skip Baijiu's death. Now this. This. *looks at the camera like I'm in the office, though my eyes are red and snot is running down my face* This sounds really weird in text, but I think it's perfect. Perfect in pacing, perfect in its place in the story, perfect in emotional damage. There are some who think it's stupid for him to die because Ying Lei died for him and so many people have sacrificed parts of themselves to bring him back, but the others don't hold a candle next to how much ZYC means to him. He isn't going to simply let ZYC die on the other side. And he finally finds the courage he always wants to have, while protecting ZYC. HE HOLDS THE FUCKING BELLS WHILE- I will stop crying :) Though I am upset he completes his arc in death, it is not farfetched.

Ep 33 (and Ying Lei's death) has its heart in the right place but once again, shows that FoF has its strength in writing about the heart but not really the body of the story. It was actually going decently, and I never had the urge to point out the '??' times since Ep 17. A pity this happens in the second last episode. But I must say Ep 34 is written decently. Will see again tomorrow.

[1moreff-creator]

Happy Birthday Arei Naegishi!

I am so bad at remembering birthdays I almost missed this one. But it's still the third in my time zone, so I'm still gonna do it! Arei's our birthday girl, and the best character ever (<- her opinion) gets a birthday post too! Spoilers below the cut as always.

-Arei's backstory was revealed in CH 2 EP 5. She was bullied heavily by her sisters, Fuyuko and Natsuko, and we see an example of them doing so by forcefully cutting part of the right side of her hair. You can even see, to this day, she seems to have more hair on her left than on her right. She also mentions "If [she] had to go to the hospital once or twice, then it was nothing more than a minor inconvenience for [her sisters]." Which, uh, huh. That's... quite awful. The point is that Arei hated her life back then, and rightfully hated her sisters as well.

-Despite that, it seems Arei tried to be kind for the longest time. She's far from an innately cruel person, but eventually, she felt the only way out was turning the table on her sisters and starting to bully them. Her secret is "Blackmailing, rumors, lying, stealing, slander. You did everything you could to ruin your sisters' lives" and she confessed that she framed them for everything she could to get them unlawfully sent to reform school. This included planting things in their bags and lying to authorities, as well as driving her mother's car into a ditch and blaming it on her sister drunk driving. Okay so bullying is maybe an understatement but the idea stands.

-And it worked! She managed to get them sent to reform school, and her life improved drastically. Morally dubious queen shit, etc. However, this made her develop a harmful ideology that being kind is a weakness and will get you treated badly. Which is why she acts unnecesarily mean during the killing game.

-However, deep down, Arei is still nice. She doesn't really like doing the things she does, she just feels they're necessary for her to survive. Even right before her secret reveal, she was trying to justify her actions to herself, saying it's normal for people to be like her:

Arei (laughing nervously): You [David] do want to hear my secret after all. As I guessed, everyone has that burning curiosity inside of them to hear bad things about other people. It's not just me.

-Which is why Eden's existence led her to a breakdown. Because Eden is nice and kind and is exactly the type of person Arei thinks would be destroyed in """the real world.""" And yet, Eden keeps going, she's still nice. Eden is what Arei wishes she could have been, she sees her past Arei in current Eden. Which is why she bullied her originally; to "teach her how the world works." Because Arei doesn't want to do real harm, so it's better if she does it than someone else later down the line.

-That doesn't go well. She breaks down in front of David, who comforts her quite successfully... so much so that she seems to forget she wanted to talk to David about his secret oops.

-This is what leads to her apologizing to Eden and promising to be her friend and a better person... and then she died. Well, under the most common interpretation.

-Her birthday lands on November 3rd, just three days after Ace's. This coincides with:

+Fountain Pen Day (Min reference?)

+National Sandwich Day.

+National Homemaker Day.

+Jellyfish Day. (?)

+Give Someone a Dollar Day (??)

+Love Your Lawyer Day (???????)

Among other things. I still have no idea where these come from.

-The roman numeral assigned to her in the LGI MV is IV (4), a number associated with death because yeeeeaaaah... This is: "right now, why do you cry?"

Ignoring the intentional mistranslation, this is probably just referencing Arei's breakdown in the playground.

-Color Theory (I'm sorry but I'm done linking that post) assigns her... well, I believe dark blue, so I'm going with that. This is cry, big and the Mandarin laugh (哈哈哈) in the rain scene.

(The good thing about having done this fucking video is that I have all the damn screenshots you could ever ask for in relation to it)

"Cry" for the same reasoning as her numeral. "Big" in this context is "proud", which fits. And the laugh is long to explain, but basically it's the "applause crew" (Cheery David, Xander, Hu, Arei) overwhelming David. Watch that part of the video for a better explanation.

-Arei had an FTE with J, which she starts off by tickling her, later claiming she would, uhm.

Arei: I'll tie you down and force you to wear maid dresses and bunny suits until you change your mind! [About acting girly]

Arei what. This screenshot feels like it should be fake what do you mean it's canon. It's great, don't get me wrong, it just feels extremely outta pocket. Listen, I (aro/ace) don't feel qualified to unpack whatever the fuck is going on here, I'm just gonna leave this to the shippers.

-What I will unpack is the other stuff in the FTE related to Arei. Which is-

Arei: C'mere! I'll tickle you until you laugh so hard that your heart stops! Then I'll defibrillate you and tickle you some more! Tickle tickle tickle!

I said the OTHER stuff

-Mainly, that she feels like being the favorite child would be great (you can figure out why yourself I imagine), and she likes acting girly.

-We also learn she categorizes people based on how she likes to bully them. "Cool and suave wannabe boys" like J (as in, she acts like a boy who tries and fails to be cool and suave), "spineless pushovers" like Levi (she "uses as maids"), "adorably sweet people" like Eden (she """likes""" to make them cry), and the people who don't like her, which would presumably include her sisters, as she says she likes to destroy these people's lives. Foreshadowing!

Fun facts!

-She likes gossip and dislikes being ignored.

-Her subtitle quote in the cast page is "If I tell you a secret, will you promise to keep it?" Which is insane foreshadowing given the chapter she (allegedly) died in.

-Her secret quote is "Because that’s what friends do", which she said to Eden in the trial flashback. The quote associated to her in Mai's page is "She doesn’t like it when her friends fight." Friendship is evidently something of a running theme.

-She likes "cute" food (?), her favorite color is azure (because she's blue), her favorite ice cream flavor is birthday cake flavor (oh, fitting!). Her least favorite color is green because it "looks like puke", which... I wonder if it has something to do with being bullied by her sisters given the apparent hospital visits.

-Her name in Kanji is written 投石【なげ ・ いし】亜鈴【あ ・ れい】. Cool! Don't know what any of that means.

-Like most of the cast, her hair color is natural and she's American.

-She's ambidextrous! The only ambidextrous person in the cast, in fact, and the only one apart from Teruko to not be a righty.

Finally songs!

+Candle Queen by Ghost & Pals (literally her song, don't @ me)

+Those Who Carried On by Ghost & Pals (it's sorta a similar attitude to how she felt about Eden, do you see my vision?)

+SCAPEG∞AT by Ghost & Pals (I will make you all listen to Ghost & Pals!)

+Perfectly Sweet by Vane Lily

+Karma by CreepP

+Bad B!tch Magic by HalaCG + others

+i DO what i WANT by KIRA

+Aishite by Kikuo

+It's Not My Fault by DECO*27 (listen Milgram had to bleed into these eventually)

+Teen Idle by Marina and the Diamonds (again I think it works)

+Pyrite Girl by RIProducer / RIP (I think it works kinda at least)

And Happy Birthday! Hope you enjoy some birthday cake ice cream, girl! Go do it!

[scoobydoodean]

do you think Dean has survivor's guilt? I'm thinking mostly of 01×12, but I'm also wondering if there's a running theme there that I don't remember

Yes, I do. In fact, I think Dean blaming himself for the outcome of traumatic experiences he couldn't have changed or that aren't his fault is something that happens very frequently, because Dean has a very overactive sense of responsibility—primarily resulting from his parentification (and the people in his life don't always help—sometimes they do, but they also sometimes feed into it).

1.12 "Faith" sets the stage for the entire theme. Dean struggles to deal with Layla not being healed when he is, and how horrible it is that a man died in exchange for his life. At the end of the episode, Dean stops running from the reaper, planning to let it kill him so Layla can be healed, but it doesn't happen because Sam disrupts the ritual before Sue Ann can complete it. (Kya has a great gifset here). What tends to co-occur with Dean struggling with survivor's guilt is the idea that Dean has a job—a responsibility, even—to the rest of the world. This is both why he must survive, and also something that weighs him down with even more guilt in a vicious cycle.

DEAN Why? Why me? Out of all the sick people, why save me? ROY Well, like I said before, the Lord guides me. I looked into your heart, and you just stood out from all the rest. DEAN What did you see in my heart? ROY A young man with an important purpose. A job to do. And it isn't finished.

I've written about Dean's survivor's guilt in the context of season 2—how 1.12 and John's sacrifice in 2.01 are primary motivations for Dean making the demon deal in 2.22. We get dialogue from Dean in 2.04 actually apologizing to Sam for John's death, because he blames himself even though it wasn't his fault and none of this was his choice.

He also blames himself for Sam's death in 2.22, even though that also isn't his fault. The parentification aspect of all of this is screaming loud in the following dialogue from Dean in 2.22:

You know, when we were little— and you couldn't been more than 5— you just started asking questions. How come we didn't have a mom? Why do we always have to move around? Where'd Dad go when he'd take off for days at a time? I remember I begged you, "Quit asking, Sammy. Man, you don't want to know." I just wanted you to be a kid... Just for a little while longer. I always tried to protect you... Keep you safe... Dad didn't even have to tell me. It was just always my responsibility, you know? It's like I had one job... I had one job... And I screwed it up. I blew it. And for that, I'm sorry. I guess that's what I do. I let down the people I love. I let Dad down. And now I guess I'm just supposed to let you down, too. How can I? How am I supposed to live with that?

Dean even as a child felt responsible for Sam, and even for John. We see John blame Dean for his own failures as a father in episodes like 1.18 "Something Wicked" and 1.21 "Salvation", and we see the impact of that tendency reflected in how Sam sometimes treats Dean as well. Hell—we have indication that even before Mary died, Dean was "cleaning up [John's] messes" according to Sam (5.16). We see John apologize for Dean having to take care of him in 2.01 instead of the other way around—an acknowledgement that he knows this has been a source of harm to Dean for a long time... but it's too little too late—and ultimately is ruined by John's next actions, leaving Dean seething with resentment toward John for seasons to come even as he grieves and blames himself for John's death.

Dean's guilt for things that aren't his fault is further explored in episodes like 1.18 "Something Wicked", 5.11 "Sam, Interrupted" and 7.04 "Defending Your Life", where Dean is confronted by his guilt over Jo's death, and feeling responsible for Sam being a hunter, which is absolute horse shit despite the fandom also trying to insist this is the case frequently (see my tags #sam the hunter for a start). He blames himself for Kevin even getting involved with hunting to begin with. Dean blames himself for the havoc Michael is wreaking (14.03, 14.06, 14.14). Dean also blames himself and feels horrible guilt for torturing souls in hell, despite the fact that this happened under extreme duress and literal decades of torture and psychological conditioning—i.e., Dean had no actual choice—he's just presented with the horror of being made to feel that it was his choice when it was deeply and torturously coerced. The very worst part of Hell for him was that he tortured other souls, and I don't think he ever recovers from the guilt of that. He clams up about it after being called weak and pathetic for being guilty about it and then he never speaks about it ever again.

Dean certainly isn't the only one with these issues. Sam, Dean, and Bobby's survivors guilt is all explored simultaneously in 4.02 "Are You There God? It's Me, Dean Winchester" when people they couldn't save like Meg Masters and Victor are brought back by a curse.

DEAN It's my fault you're dead. I left you [Victor] behind. And the minute I heard about that explosion, I thought, "I should have known." I should have protected you.

This whole episode implicates hunters as a whole with serious survivor's guilt for the people they can't/don't manage to save. Multiple hunters die in the beginning of the episode, killed by the people they're haunted by not saving. This is a natural and understandable result of the work itself. You just barely don't get to someone in time, or you make a choice with an outcome you didn't forsee at the time, or you weren't fast enough or strong enough, or you dodged left when you should have dodged right, or you should have stayed, or you "let" the monster get away and it killed again. You are in a line of work where you are probably always left thinking, "If only I had done [insert hindsight judgement here]". Bobby blames himself for the deaths of two kids in 4.02. He blames himself for his wife Karen's death (3.10). Sam blames himself for Ava (2.11) and they all accept blame for the Devil's Gate even though that wasn't their fault either (and other hunters throw the blame on all of them too) (3.01).

The thing about being a parentified child is that you are, by definition, held responsible for things you are not equipped or qualified to handle—things that are too much for you, that are not actually your responsibility, and that are/were entirely out of your control. Combine growing up being blamed for things you did not actually have the power or authority to make happen or prevent from happening, with the overall tendency within the line of work hunters are in to feel survivor's guilt, and you get Dean. Add in that Dean cares deeply for other people—even strangers—and therefore feels an extra empathy when people are harmed for these things he thinks he could have prevented. You get someone whose moments of suicidal ideation are usually deeply connected to survivor's guilt or guilt more generally.

[moash]

I'm gonna kms this will not send so I'm splitting it up pt1 please send!!

OK I'm gonna say it!!! I would forgive Moash!! I would forgive him if it meant we got to see him really truly apologize for the things he's done and have a bunch of breakdowns and accept that he messed up and has to forgive HIMSELF for it and then have someone (coughkaladincough) forgive him. I don't care if that's controversial. I don't want forgiveness unwarranted and just handed to him on a silver platter, I want him to truly redeem himself with serious effort and fight for it (usually people go the sacrifice path but I'd wager it'd be more painful to LIVE with his self-loathing and overcome it and I'd love to see that for him) and I don't care how much bad shit he's done, because literally, everyone in this crew has done fucked up shit (yesiknow it's not all equal), and I don't really care that they did? Like so many people in our crew has killed people, but because the were the "right" people(fortherightcause), it's all fine and good, I guess. And just. Forgiveness doesn't have to be accepting what you did as OK. That's NOT what forgiveness means. I love this quote from APA I found: "Forgiveness involves willfully putting aside feelings of resentment toward someone who has committed a wrong, been unfair or hurtful, or otherwise harmed you in some way. Forgiveness is not merely accepting what happened or ceasing to be angry. Rather, it involves a voluntary transformation of your feelings, attitudes, and behavior, so that you are no longer dominated by resentment and can express compassion, generosity, or the like toward the person who wronged you." ANYWAY I want him to be redeemed. I want him to be forgiven. And MAYBE that's not in the cards for him, and he continues to be a "villain" in his arc, and maybe he suffers until the very end. It wouldn't make me like his character any less. I just think it would be a tragic end. Hey little guy who had his grandparents killed, was a slave, turned to drugs, depressed and apathetic, told there was no way out, killed a bunch of people, does what he thinks is what HAS to be done but he still gets torn up about it and clearly hates himself for it: Actually, yeah, there's no redemption for you! Die in a fire! ??????????

pt2

but we can forgive Zseth, who did everything because he thought he was doing what he had to do, that he had no way out (sound familiar) and MURDERED A FUCK TON OF PEOPLE. We saw how it tore him up, he was immediately remorseful.

Zseth didn't CHOOSE to kill the people he did, and while he wasn't quite mind controlled, he also felt like he had literally no choice, so like, duh. You're gonna do what you're told.

But you still killed a LOT of people.

And you still deserve to be redeemed if you feel sorrowful for what you've done.

no matter how much someone's death is your fault or not, no matter how much someone "deserved it", there's still blood on your hands, and you still killed someone (coughdalinarshallankaladinadolinjasnahetcetccoughcough).

And you can still be redeemed.

Right, fandom?

….

Yeah. That's what I thought.

This is complicated and not a perfect one to one comparison I KNOW which is why I don't usually like comparing character storylines, because it's not always equal and everyone wants to go UM ACTUALLY about it but …

I can't quite put it into words properly but saying Moash doesn't deserve to be redeemed when he's drugged up on a revenge path backed by a god's influence is kind of fucked because we KNOW he's remorseful for at least some of it, and he has a lot of complicated feelings on everything he's done. I don't care if he chose the path. People make mistakes! (big ones!!) We don't need to forgive him for what he did, or think it was OK!! But to say he is the worst of the worst is a little… weird, for lack of a better term. But…

I DUNNO maybe that's just me. I in no way hate any of the other characters (szeth, dalinar, etc) for the things they've done, we know they're reasons.

But in the same way I can't really justify hating Moash, no matter how harsh his crimes are.

It's sort of like saying if you go to heaven and you repent you'll be forgiven, but not you Jan, you killed a few people and a close friend. But you, who killed your wife and hundreds of people? Yeah. You're fine.

It's giving hypocrite, if I'm being honest <3

Anyway that's my take sorry to take it to your inbox I just don't really have a place to post this and also I feel like I'm forgetting some things since it's been a while since I read the books, sorry! Maybe don't even respond to this lmao Just wanted to rant about my boy, I guess.

wow! hi!!!!

i think szeth is actually a good character to compare bc he like laid waste to an entire nation single-handedly, and yea he thought he had to because taravangian had his oathstone, but he still did all that. there’s like no discourse about him bc we’re just like yea he’s skrungly, it’s fine. and it is fine! i think it’s fine that we just think of him as a skrungly, that’s ok. but moash should perish? well. as you said it’s hypocrisy.

also the bit about everyone going to heaven except jan. quite literally this is what happens to susan in the chronicles of narnia. everyone goes to heaven but not susan bc she likes lipstick and boys. hell.

[godkilller]

out of character. Frembly remembly that while I may write Gin and Rangiku being soft / cute, that doesn't change the fact that Gin commits a few problematique relationship crimes aside from his canon betrayal... including, but not limited to:

Stalking -- it's not always outright following her around, but keeping constant tabs on Rangiku via locking onto her reiatsu at any given moment is still lowkey stalking behavior in my book.

Possessiveness -- this is mostly my own interpretation and it's pretty subdued at most times, but there have been a few points in my roleplay where I have it flare up nice and ugly; this is the Ichimaru Gin who says he devours his favorites whole, this passion of his can easily become possessive and obsessive lust and fully envelop Rangiku in a strangling grasp.

Honorably mentioning Obsession in its own bullet point because of how potent that can be when blanketed across his entire vow to retrieve her soul piece being based entirely on him deciding, as a child, that this was the hill to die on, to murder for. For a girl he just met, that's a lot.

Murder! Gin killed those Shinigami that assaulted Rangiku as a child, they're shown to be the ones Gin plucks a Shinigami robe from in the blizzard when he tells Rangiku he's going to 'fix things' for her. The following murders Gin dishes out for the Third Seat and many unnamed others aren't directly linked to Rangiku/for the sake of Rangiku alone, so I won't count them specifically here, but those three/four guys? Hell yeah. We can argue they had it comin' and I'll agree, but it's still Problematique that he killed them 'for' her.

Emotional Withholding -- again, not quite in the outright and proper way that is prevalent in toxic and abusive relationships (often used to convey anger/punishment via that withholding), but he's withdrawn from her during the Rescue Rukia arc in a way that is specifically distressing and confusing for Rangiku, who knows Gin isn't behaving like himself, and he's refusing to communicate anything to her during that time. A blanket apology before abandoning her on Sokyoku Hill doesn't cover it.

Abandonment. Because of the lasting effect it had on Rangiku, this is considerably awful and something that could have at the very least been eased via him explaining himself to some vague degree rather than not at all, leaving her to wonder where he was going, what he was up to, and why he didn't tell her shit. The argument could be made that he didn't want to unnecessarily lie to her, but he's already lying to her in other ways.

Deflection via Twisting, turning Rangiku's questions onto her instead of allowing her to properly drill into him when she finally confronts him on the rooftop, which then subsequently leads to guilt-tripping topped with a cherry of "you're in the way," that's overall an awful thing to say/do AND THEN POINTING SHINSO AT HER AND --

Threatening Bodily Harm. This one's getting put on here because at the end of the day, regardless of Gin's intent to skewer Momo and not Rangiku, Rangiku still put herself between them and it still happened where he almost hurt her instead. The second time being on the rooftop, where he pretends to kill her via a well-aimed Shinso with a simultaneous Hakufuku, but the act is so well guised that Rangiku, in that moment, thought Gin was going to kill her.

But joke's on you, Ginran makes me froth at the mouth and howl at the moon before barreling at you on all fours, so... if you can't get past these fictional flaws? Skill issue tbh.

[dunktape]

can you genuinely, i mean so genuinely not copy a creator who's already been through and is going through rough shit? i thought you were an alt of chocoperrito's, i saw you were "heavily inspired", same style and similar intro, this is plain disrespectful and cruel to do to an artist who's already stated they're not okay with that.

i hope you can find it in your heart to at least apologize to hym.

hey , saw this and genuinely wanted to address it as my intentions are genuinely not to copy anyone , let alone cause harm . summary is all the way down under the cut ( last paragraph )

first of all , i'm sorry to hear that reki isn't doing well . i hope hy'll get better soon , but i couldn't have known he wasn't in a well mental state because i don't want to and can't interact with hys blog . i've been blocked quite a while ago , just after the first post i made on this blog . what happened will stay private as requested , but ive apologised and as far as i know , we made up . hy doesn't want to interact with me and i respect his boundaries .

talking of boundaries , i did not know hy was uncomfortable with people getting inspired by his art style . it is true that i took inspiration from hym , but to be fair all i took inspiration from was the shape of fur . my colour theory was fully taught to me by ashenoranges , round shapes have been inspired by another artist who does not want to be named , the way i draw hands along with cartoon-ish ( and also the round shapes ) by an artist on tiktok whose name i forgot ( but did a lot of utau / fell art , something along the lines of pupbiteez ) and the eyes i've just always drawn that way because i adapted it from when i just started getting into animation memes , but i tend to add tearducts too ( which i've adapted from p0ny.world ) . also , i love the chalky way calciumdreams's and yokoneko's art looks which i'm trying to work on getting into my art . i also mentioned some other artists in a previous ask about my artstyle , those artists also provide me references for when i'm trying to draw animals that stand on all fours .

asked one of my friends if they had any art of reki saved , for comparison . i guess i can see the similarities ?

the thing is that i use several outlines and lots of rendering on top of it and use a shade between green and orange always - when reki uses one line-art layer , has highlights instead of shadows in the hair , usually a blue shade and overall has thinner line-art where parts between similar parts of clothing and / or fur gets coloured differently in line-art .

i'm not saying my and reki's styles do not look extremely similar or that he never said anything about not liking inspiration , but i did not copy ( or at least INTEND to copy ) hym , neither did i ( key word , i ) ever read he was uncomfortable with inspiration . if you would like to provide proof then i'd love to have you dm it to me /gen

my intro post had taken me quite a few months to come up with , going through a few things to get inspiration from . however , i can see why you think i copied him , especially with how i provided my links . asked a friend of mine to provide a screenshot of reki's blog to compare them after you sent this ask . to clarify - i actually got inspo for my graphic and the stars between links from a friend of mine , who used to make simple transparent background graphics and used the 𓈒 symbol in between links instead . since i'm a pretty big fan of stars , i used stars instead . went through tags to find introduction posts that i could take inspo from , which mostly used different colours , and since i usually use orange or green shades in my art ( since they're my favourite colours ) i thought i'd apply that to highlight parts i thought were important . just talked a bit about me , connected a link to my identity in case you want to get to know me better , provided a link to my toy house in case you wanted to see my characters , then talked a bit about asks because i barely really got any before . it looked a bit empty at that point , so i thought i'd largen up something , but doing that at the top of the post seemed like it went from big to small and i didn't like that . moved the links to the bottom , largened them up and that seemed pretty good . but now it was a bit empty on top of the page , so after messing around with the graphic i realised that maybe i should add something that would devide the graphic from the text - a divider . now everything looked tidy , while not being too little nor too much . a link to stuff that went more into detail ,, perfect right ? but ;

i can totally see why you think they look familiar : same colours , same link stuff , separate part about the inbox , divider between texts and images , but i don't have access to reki's blog so i wouldn't have known . even if i did before , i wouldn't have remembered that in the past 2 months where i was much more busy with other stuff than remembering what someone else's , who didn't want to interact with me , intropost looked like .

HOWEVER ! i do acknowledge that my EMOTE art looks incredibly - extremely , almost completely identical to hys . hand shapes , eye shapes , body shapes , even the yellow body and line-art , the SHADING - all of that . i guess that comes with having similar artstyles , then also worrying about whether or not your art looks ok . i actually asked a friend of mine what i could change about my art so other people would maybe like or use it more , and they said that i only ever use harsh - thick lines , so i should keep the line-art simple and try airbrushing stuff . this is basically what reki did , and so i did use one of hys emotes from a server i'm in as a reference - i really liked the result , and posted it not thinking about how familiar they looked despite literally having his emotes and mine side by side for comparison .

they're extremely similar , especially the little closed eyes and blush . they both have that little red eyelid bit above their eyes and shaded cheeks + hands . i admit this is my fault for not having realised earlier how i basically copied hys style , and i'll try to make it more into my own style next time . i'm unsure of how to yet , but i'll figure something out .

also , besides all that , i'm not really copying his appearances , sonas , other stuff hy might have made . the yellow guy is pretty popular after all since it doesn't have an actual appearance or anything that would relate to identity and can be interpreted as anyone . sure , there's blogs like k9emotes who make white sillies instead of yellow , but i prefer using yellow and i'm also going to use these emotes . not saying i won't change how i'll draw them , this is just a reason , but that's why my and hys emotes look so similar — they're exactly what i and my friends would like emotes to look like if we're going to use them frequently .

all of this is not an excuse but simply an explanation so i hope everything is more clear . as stupid as it may sound , the intro post was truly a coincidence . my art looks similar to hys ( but not that much ) because he was an inspiration , but not my only inspiration and definitely not my biggest but the hair / fur is something i do use the most . i deeply apologise for any harm i have done and crossing unknown boundaries , but i'm afraid i can't directly apologise to reki as he doesn't want to interact with me , boundaries are boundaries .

long story short — yes i got inspired by the fur , the intro post was purely coincidental , unconsciously took too much inspo from emotes , i apologise for what i did but can't apologise directly bc im blocked .

[bedforddanes75]

wips!!! talk to meeeeeeee about them <3333

-b

tbh it was just the one and im gonna rant because I Have Been Prompted x

for whatever mentally ill reason its gatty so apologies but basically its dlid era, and about 20k words of george being In Love and In Denial but hes silly leave him alone:( in those 20k its just RIDICULOUS tho. it is soundtracked to literally anything angsty BUT... also songs and instrumentals by adrianne lenker because that's where i got the title from LMFAO. i also made a pinterest board of it and thats mostly what i wanted to bring up because its so like omg the vibes are so AAA. anyway have...a snippet. so. hoe this is scary how do u do this OKAY dude omg im stressed ALSO Maybe consider this nsfw idk he starts talking shit about matty wanking So um. whatever ALSO sorry tw for homophobic slurs :<

They're fine, stood alone, until someone walks past and shoves Matty with his shoulder, mumbles something about 'What a fag', then looks at him, sniggering. Matty looks down at his hands, fiddling awkwardly.

George glares at the boy, then grabs his shoulder, yanking at him so they're face-to-face.

“Something to say about your boyfriend? Boyfriend who looks like a girl?”

George gives him a hard look, clenching his jaw, balling his fists.

“He’s not my boyfriend. But yeah, I do, actually. Don’t you fucking call him that.”

“Oh, makes sense that you’d say that. Cos you're one too, aren't you? Fucking queer,” he spits, attempting (and failing) to square up, having to tilt his head back an embarrassing amount just to look George in the eye.

The next thing George knows is someone's on the floor in front of him with a bloody nose and his knuckles are pink.

“George, what the fuck!” Ross shouts, suddenly appearing from some door or other.

He can't reply, just stares at the boy on the ground, accepting as people cheer for more and Adam and Ross pull him away.

He's a little unsure of what happens for the next while, all he knows is he doesn't enjoy it, sitting, walking, explaining what happened over and over again, because all he can think of is the look on Matty's face after he spoke. The way he'd looked so hopeless, pulling his hat down further. All he knew in that moment was that he never wanted to see it again.

His mother questions him about what happened as she drives him home, in shock about the fact her (usually quite docile) son had just punched someone. And he tells the truth. He tells her about how sad Matty had looked, how he just wanted to hug him, but something just made him want to hurt the kid.

She believes him, of course, knowing the lengths they’d go for each other, but decides to stay quiet about the fact George got himself almost punched just for the sake of his friend, and what that might mean, especially with their conversation the night prior.

Once they get home, George hides in his room, sitting on his bed and staring at his hands. He can't believe he actually punched someone, the only acts of violence he'd ever shown otherwise were to his friends, playful, nothing genuinely harmful. The sight of that kid on the floor, nose all red and bloodied, made him feel uneasy, knowing he could do that. He knew he was intimidating to most people, with a resting face that looked almost empty, and a stature of six foot something, but he didn’t think he had it in him to give another reason to be scared.

He just can't stop thinking about how happy Matty had seemed before, his smile, those crooked teeth that he loves oh so much, his stupid giggles. The fact he's thinking about his best friend's smile and blushing to himself doesn't fail to make him even more uncomfortable.

George puts his head in his hands, squeezing his eyes shut tightly behind his palms, and lets his shoulders dip down. His mind races with thoughts of Matty, and he feels sick. The thoughts don't stop at just his smile either, and he finds himself thinking about Matty's bare body, thinking about his skinny torso and bony arms, thinking about Matty touching himself, wondering what he would do, what he thought about, who he thought about, whether he'd fuck up into his fist.

He whines, distressed, feeling like a kicked dog, unsure of what to do.

The worst part about it, though, is the fact he's now fully aware of the fact he's getting hard. Over Matty, his best friend, who is also a boy. He wants to cry, he's not gay, so why is he thinking about Matty like that? Especially since Matty is very much a man.

um. anyway. bragging is cool guys show me every wip you have Immediately... also if this sucks then suck my dick and prove it