#persecutor shit

[professional-retired-asshole]

More persecutor memes about myself specifically

[ID: "draw 25 uno meme." Uno card reads "don't insult people unnecessarily or draw 25," guy with cards is labeled "me." /End ID]

[ID: "types of headaches meme." the full red diagram is labeled "not being an asshole to total strangers whenever I front." /End ID]

[ID: Gus Fringe "we are not the same" meme. Caption reads "You persecute in order to protect or express trauma, I persecute because it's fun as hell and my personal right, we are not the same." /End ID]

[ID: the same meme but the caption reads,"You try not to give a shit because it makes you feel power and in control of your emotions, I genuinely don't give a shit because these fucks are below me, we are not the same." /End ID]

[ID: "borat 2 tonight queen??" texting meme. Instead the messages read "torture tonight 👀 stabbing tonight queen?? torture tonite 👀" /End ID]

[ID: "I should buy a boat" cat meme. Caption reads, "I should torture an NPC in the inner world." /End ID]

[ID: Star Wars "for the better, right?" meme. First caption reads, "everything I do is rooted in my own self interest and nothing else." Second and third caption reads "You do secretly care about other people though besides that, right? Right?" /End ID]

[persecutor-bites]

I block people who treat persecutors like attack dogs btw

[beelzebubsbois]

ARE WE SURE SANDER SIDES ISNT RELATED TO OSDDID? BECAUSE FOR SOMETHING NOT RELATED TO OSDDID IT DOES AN AMAZING JOB AT SHOWING DID SYSPTOMS AND SYSTEM SHIT.

[intofree]

this cutscene is 10 times funnier with this helmet on

[finnslay]

Persecutor culture is seeing the beauty of the world for the first time and being on the verge of tears because.... holy shit...

How did I miss that?

Some pictures under the cut...

[littlest-bugz]

Me: says literally anything to my friends

That one persecutor: oh my gods ur such an asshole. they're going to hate you forever over what you say, you know?

Me:

[oopsallsyscourse]

a lot of people interpret persecutor to be the angry, aggressive alter but that’s not entirely true. we have a persecutor who’s friendly, attentive and caring. we have another one who is shy and clingy. they both still do harm to system (although significantly less as we have worked out coping mechanisms)

i think the association of “bad guy” and persecutor is responsible for at least some of the ways persecutors are treated, as someone who needs punishment rather than someone who has unhealthy behaviors

[professional-retired-asshole]

Shoutout to persecutors whose end goal of recovery isn’t being a protector (or some other supporting role)

Shoutout to persecutors who don’t want to engage in what’s generally thought of as “recovery”

Shoutout to persecutors who prioritize change/personal growth/adaptation to what they’re dealing with now, not “recovery”

Shoutout to persecutors who want to be recognized for who they are now, not who they might be in the future

Shoutout to persecutors who need to continue to be persecutors in order to deal with their current environment, persecutors who aren’t “safe” yet

Shoutout to persecutors who have no internal motivation to change their morality or ethics

Shoutout to persecutors who see nothing wrong with what they’re doing, but still have to change their behavior

Shoutout to persecutors who struggle to change their behavior

Shoutout to persecutors who prefer ways of coping and interacting with others that aren’t “therapist-approved”

Shoutout to persecutor-protectors and persecutors-turned-protectors who do their jobs in a way that isn’t soft and positive, or do their job in a “mean” way

We’re valuable as we are now, not just as we might be later or might’ve been earlier

[persecutor-bites]

Thinking about the time I asked a plural help blog if they had any resources for dealing with in-system abuse and they replied with a post about how to “deal with” persecutors.

[the-fictive-haven]

Welp Nine finally snapped at our mom, that's gonna be fun to try to reconcile. Goddamn it.

I fully agree with him but we needed her for supply shopping. Ugh.

[xeminial]

Tw: buncha system-related rant scoops dipped in trauma sauce served with some spite-filled sprinkles.

Yk no one talks about the system-caused traumas being debilitating sometimes, even worse for persecutors, which will sound ironic at first but hear me out

Like you can go and talk about your external abusers n bullies, and everyone would agree how shit those people are. Because they are.

And then when people talk about in-system traumas, 9 times out 10, they mean traumas influenced or caused by persecutors within their system, how fucked up that is, etc etc.

And I get that. I get why that is an issue, a very bad one, and as a persecutor i fucking agree we do suck at times. We do wrong at times, hurt the system trying to help, and overall cause damage without meaning to do so.

What I don't get is how and why the same people fall silent when it is the persecutors who are harmed and suppressed by the others.

Like i get it, shit is hard as fuck. That you have to act sometimes, that sometimes you have to get the headmate out of the front so the system will be safe, you have to keep them inside at times, you end up having fights and have to chill everything down at times. I get that. shit happens while u try to survive. I respect that.

So no offense to anyone who went through that and made peace with their pesecutors afterwards. My anger is not towards them.

My anger is towards those, that despite all the warnings other systems do, despite all the info, despite knowing better; i see and know quite a few folk who suppress their persecutors into dormancy, force them into splitting, locking them in a far-off place, isolating them from the rest of the system and generally hurt them in order to "get them in line" or "heal" the system. And they somehow expect their persecutors to work with them, or see them as their savior (which is, fuck off). And they do that knowingly. When a persecutor speaks up about how wrong this shit is, even if this is after realizing they are a persecutor and trying to change their ways; they are silenced and somehow the hurt done by system's gatekeepers or protectors is validated. That the hurt done to persecutors is somehow okay because they are persecutors. Like it was "deserved" so the persecutor can change and stop being a "harmful part".

That they are doing a favor by locking them up. Locking us up.

Do yall realize how similar this is to people being ableist and not taking a mentally ill person seriously due to them being mentally ill? This is internalized ableism.

I feel like this stems from not knowing what a persecutor is, what we do, and why we do the things the way we do. Do you, my lovely gatekeeper/protector who wants to lock us rather than let us find a healthy way to cope, do you know the shit we had to deal with to get your ass out of that place relatively safe and sound ?

Do you think you can survive without us? Without us, who do the dirtiest of the dirty work of dealing with oppressors and abusers head-on, over and over, while being villainized by the very system we keep safe every single day?

Try to take our role in this shitty world and see if your healthy coping mechanisms and cute grounding techniques work while being brutally abused. Try it. See how much the world traumatizes you and even decapitates you from coping like a healthy person. As if you are one. You aren't, none of us aren't, this world is not made for us, queer neurodivergent mentally ill folk, and it is hard coping in it. See how much the world will leave those ugly scars on you and watch them pile up one by one as each day passes.

And then turn back inside and look at your own system, that you worked so hard to protect, fire back at you because you couldn't stop yourself from behaving the same way you were taught/conditioned to behave to survive, and watch them betray you due to how traumatized you are.

Realize how much this shit hurts right in your guts, and then come back to me.

[florasolarsystem]

System Roles and Jobs

To clarify because im terrified of miscommunication- system roles are their general role and title within the system that their jobs fall under. The jobs are more specific tasks that they do to fulfill their role.

The variety of jobs within systems? I love it. Even looking at the most general terms how that role specifically works within a system is so fascinating to me. No system is the same and how one protector operates and their job within a system can be so entirely different from another. For us a lot have hyperspecific or seemingly random roles and tasks within the system in order to help us. It's also partially why even if they're defined as (for example) a protector we tend to have to go into more detail due to their specific jobs.

Some examples of jobs within the system that I find cool:

Our main protector has a variety of jobs but one of the daily ones was helping us walk to and from school, especially with crossing roads in general. We've always been bad at it and genuinely put ourselves in danger accidentally repeatedly, and when we're struggling mentally it's even worse. So he's join us in co front of take front and just chat with us as we walked and made sure we stayed safe. There were a few other situations like people's dogs not being locked away properly or strangers offering us rides- lol- that he handled within the role.

One of my headmates her role is genuinely just to like things in moderation and has a few jobs that fall under that. We have issues with hyperfixations and obsessions over things we like and damaging our mental health due to it (and occassionally physical stuff due to things like forgetting to eat or not sleeping) and so when she fronts or is nearby it's easier to take breaks from things or she'll redirect us to new tasks or things like eating and help us stay focused on them instead.

We have one person who just helps us communicate with each other in different ways. It's normally by finding ways externally to communicate and then helping remind and encourage us to use them. Some of it has been through helping people write excerpts about their day or life or goals (normally masked as fanfiction), finding songs people relate to, starting a lil system of notes and reminders on our mirror for example.

Someone helps us establish boundaries by having alone time. It just means she fronts and does her own thing for a bit but doesn't reply to texts or talk to anyone unless it's urgent which is something we really struggle with.

One person's role as a protector is to just share violent and scary thoughts with those who can handle it better, in order to help us find coping skills for when one of our irl friends does something similar. His main job is literally to say scary things about harming people-

But yeah, none of this is gonna be a ground breaking revelation to hear but I find it cool all the specific jobs and ways people do their roles. If you have any you'd like to share please do, I could go on abot this for ages. ✌️

[cold--carnage]

so anyway I have a clone and he's a dick

[healingpolyphony]

Got the fucking Urges lads

[system-of-a-feather]

Disaster with my name plastered on it adverted. This system almost DIDNT FUCKING VOTE. Like Aderis was over there like "You know if we prioritize self care and our schedule to voting, XIV's gonna be mad you know how political he is."

Like YES. I WOULD be. I WOULD be pissed and pissed would be an UNDERSTATEMENT. Jesus christ.

The suffering of being the only part in this system politically CHARGED. Jesus christ do not take my little ability to put my word out at the government. I'm not allowed to start riots do not make me miss out on fucking *voting* jesus.

-XIV

[tabellae-rex-in-sui]

So many governments tried to get rid of Sade but none of them just tried to fuck him. Maybe that's what his sub ass wanted. Just fuck him and he'll go away

New strategy