#one of the best books i havbe read that uses being an alien from outer space to discuss gender dysphoria body dysmorphia and disability

[laciere]

The station is swarming with maggots too. I can't find a seat and am being pushed here and there, getting squashed against the train doors, staring dazedly as the mass of maggots reflected in the window. I can't even secure a spot to set my bag down for a bit. Now that i think about it, I've taken the subway at rush hour. I am stone dead. Is happiness merely a mirage? Is it a rainwo that disappears as suddenly as it appears? An unstable cloud that looks like it might shortly burst. That's the state I'm in. My gums ache and itch. My teeth are ripping at my cheeks, screaming to be let out. I hold my shuddering mouth shut with two hands. My eyeball threatens to slide behind my right ear, and my left leg bends backward like a deer's. Haha... what a mess. I become the focus of the other passengers' gazes. They whisper to each other, Look over there, what's wrong that person, so weird, I'm scared. Hello, everyone? I can hear you all. Let me tell you, my hearing is perfectly sharp, even if my earlobes are dripping onto my shoulders.

As soon as the doors of this not-coffin open, I totter off in search of the toilets (although I wish I could run), swinging my arms that have stretched and bloated like overcooked noodles. I feel like a food waste bag dripping its rotten soup. I'm in a jam. People are busy avoiding me up close and pointing at me from afar. My gait has quickly become the object of ridicule and horror. Am I wrong? It would be great if i was. I undestand their hearts, a hundred, a thousand times over. For them, life is so boring that if someone doesn't walk with ease, taking steady steps on two healthy legs of the same length, they violently overreact as if they were waiting for it. I think their bar for reactions is pretty low. They can't wait to ogly a monster. Without monsters, how would they withstand the unrelenting futility of their days?

Walking Practice by Dolki Min, translated by Victoria Caudle (2022, HarperVia)