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narvaldetierra · 2 years ago

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It's just a kiss

This is the Mistletoe square for the Holiday Bingo created by @storiesofsvu

Fandom: Blindspot Characters: The team. Tags: Crackfic. Chaotic Rich. A little fluff in the end. Words: 1608 A/N: Just because I love this chaotic being. It was funnier in my mind, but here we go.

Summary: Rich and a mistletoe, what could go wrong?

5 times Rich strategically placed a mistletoe and one time he got a kiss.

Rich looked at his calendar, what looked like a green asterisk was drawn on that very same day. The team names were distributed over the following 5 days, starting with “What was her name?”. He had the whole week planned and expectations too high, even for him.

The journey began early on Monday morning. He had precisely measured the space in the hallway to the lab, counted the steps one by one to calculate the exact spot, and studied Tasha's movements during the mornings. He knew the exact moment she would go to the lab and he waited in hiding until it happened.

“Hey!” greeted her with a wide and characteristic smile on his face, pretending that they had met by coincidence.

“Hey, Rich.” She greeted back in a much less friendly way.

“What are you doing this early here, did Patty already call you?”

“No, I just came to say hi and see if I could be of any help.”

“Oh, very thoughtful of you,” his voice was already beginning to sound suspicious. However, before she had time to react, he grabbed her by the arm to stop her. Because of the way Tasha stared at him, he immediately regretted it. “Hey, now that we're here, I wanted to ask you something. You've been here longer than I am, and you know better the policies here, and–”

“Just say it Rich.”

“Hmm, that is what I think it is?” he said at high speed pointing upward. A few inches over their heads hung a branch of mistletoe, the only Christmas decoration in the entire hallway.

Tasha opened her mouth in surprise and immediately shook her head, looking at Rich with a frown.

“Judging by your silence I'd say yes,” he shrugged, “well, who am I to interfere with the rules, right?”

He closed his eyes and leaned on her, giving her space to correspond the kiss. However, halfway through he stopped when he heard her.

“Don't even try it. Unless you want to get a black eye.”

Rich jumped back, clapping his palms together as if wiping them clean, “yeah, well, they shouldn't put those decorations in the office, don't you think? It can be something inappropriate.”

Tasha snorted and walked away toward the lab. He watched her walk away, after getting his first cross for the week. He comforted himself with the thought that there were still four more days to try.

—---

On Tuesday afternoon he put his second plan into action. When Patterson arrived at the lab, he was waiting for her with a cup of coffee for her and a preliminary report about a tattoo he had been working on. He had tried to make it all seem normal and hide his enthusiasm, but the Machiavellian smile on his face was undisguisable.

“What it's happening?” Patterson asked after a few minutes.

“I don't know what you are talking about.”

“Rich,” she insisted “what did you do?”

“Nothing!” his voice became high-pitched, so he cleared his throat and added, “you can come here and confirm it if you want.”

Patterson left the terminal on which she had been working and walked over to the corner of the lab where Rich was working. At that moment, Rich pull off from a string and a mistletoe fell dangling just above their heads.

“Oh!” he exclaimed, pretending to be surprised, “Are they already setting up the Christmas decorations?”

“Rich, we don't usually decorate the office, especially not the lab.”

“Someone seems to have missed the memo,” he shook his head with a disapproving grimace, before adding, “but you know, a tradition is a tradition, and I'm no one to break them…” He watched her expectantly with hope, but the feeling was short-lived.

“Definitely no.” Patterson said.

“Oh, come one, it is just a kiss… I don't want to do it any more than you do, but tradition dictates it.”

“Rich– I won't– You can take the idea out of your mind because it's not going to–” Patterson's voice was interrupted by an alarm from the tattoo base and that was it. She walked away from him and Rich spent the rest of the day harping on their debt to the mistletoe. However, nothing happened.

—---

Wednesday was Reade's turn. It had been hard to plant the mistletoe in Reade's office, but the night before, after everyone had gone home to rest, he took the opportunity to climb through the ventilation ducts from what he called "his office" to the FBI sub-director's office.

As he wasn't able to carry a ladder through ventilation ducts, hanging the mistletoe would be almost impossible, considering the high ceilings in the office. So he decided to make a little machine, that was placed in the vent, with an extensible arm long enough to hold the mistletoe just above the middle of the desk.

He had to be honest with himself, deep down he had no hope of actually achieving anything, but he figured he had nothing to lose by trying either. But when kindly reminded him that he could terminate his contract and return him to prison at any time, Rich decided that it was time to run and never try something like that ever again.

—---

Late on Thursday, he ran into Jane in the office lockers. His hope was beginning to fade, but he wasn't giving up like that, he would keep trying until the end of the week.

The truth was that placing the mistletoe there had been tricky. Not because of the logistics of doing so, but because of choosing the right location to make sure they could meet in the same place. He thought about positioning it on top of her locker, or on top of the sinks in front of the mirror. But in the end, he decided the placed it over the door and waited inside for her to arrive, pretending to be on his way out.

“Hey! Going home already?” he asked as if it were something usual.

“Rich,” she was surprised, “hmm, yeah, I was leaving.”

“Yeah... it was a long day,” nodded and an awkward silence ensued, “Well, I don't want to be the one to slow you down, I'm sure you have plans.” He took a step out of the room so she could enter, then pointed to the mistletoe, “hey, have you seen that?”

Jane seemed surprised to see that branch in such a remote location, with nothing else for decoration, then she understood what was going on, and she gave Rich a look that said “it's not going to happen”.

“I think someone has a lot of Christmas spirit,” said pretending it wasn't his, “Do you think that we should–? You know…”

“What? I'm not going to kiss you, Rich,” she said indignantly, taking a step back.

“What are you talking about! I meant to take it off,” he replied with a sardonic short laugh, “Did you really think I would propose such a thing? I mean, if you want to I could think about it.”

“Well, I know that–” Jane began to say, but he interrupted her.

“But please, Jane, we are at work. It won't be appropriate, and you are already married,” he let out a snort still laughing and shaking his head, as he walked away, leaving Jane pretty much confused, since she already knew about the attempts to kiss Tasha and Patterson he already had during the week.

—---

Friday was his last attempt to get any kisses under a sprig of mistletoe. While Tasha and Jane interrogated a suspect related to a tattoo case, Rich was outside the room along with Kurt. They both watched in silence, Rich with his tablet in hand, to corroborate the data in case of need, but his mind traveled much further imagining another scenario.

He did love to get a kiss from Kurt, he had set it as a personal challenge for himself since they met and he knew he was an FBI agent, rather than a hitman, but he knew he would never get it. Indeed, he knew Kurt was too straight, but there was nothing he enjoyed more than making him uncomfortable through all his innuendos.

That's why, when he finally set the mistletoe over their heads, and even when he didn't get the kiss he was aiming for, enjoyed every second of Kurt's look, hesitating over the most appropriate response to give until Rich laughed and said it was just a joke. Kurt laughed as well, still nervous. He wasn't that sure about the "joke".

—---

Friday night, with no more urgencies to solve and disappointed for not getting even a single kiss, he was ready to return to the safe house, with the usual guard. However, while he was waiting for the elevator, a familiar fragrance reached him and above his head, he could see a male hand holding a small branch of mistletoe. When he turned around, he met the beautiful brown eyes of Boston Arliss Crab. His smile was immediate, making his eyes shine.

Rich leaned close to him, put his hand cupping the side of Boston's face, and kissed him. He even closed his eyes, enjoying the moment, happy to have gotten his long-awaited kiss.

“What are you doing here?” Rich asked.

“Well, I had to come to see some papers from the last time I served for the FBI and I heard you had an interesting week.”

“Oh, you know about it?”

“Of course I do, what else would I have this for?” emphasized on mistletoe.

Rich laughed, bite his lip, and kissed him again. It definitely was the most wonderful time of the year.

#storiesofsvuholidaybingo2022 #blindspot fanfic #rich dotcom #william patterson #patterson #jane doe #tasha zapata #edgar reade #kurt weller #boston arliss crab #blindspot

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blondrichclosetwitch · 14 days ago

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I’m changing mediums.

To those involved, your corruption seeps from your pores, and it is sick, and it is sad. But that’s for you to deal with. I’m not your toy nor your queen. 16 years younger, and this is your representation? I should have listened when he warned me y’all were caustic. Oh darling you didn’t know the half of it.

I’ll leave you with what I found when I did a search for Gina in my phone, which I then tried in a scene.

All the text with the exception of the closing monologue & lines from Liza/ggg come from texts messages I sent, my tarot reading on 10/02/16, (5 days before her accident)and things my analyst and her writing assistant wrote about me. If I wrote them myself, there’s an asterisk.

Here I am after the Tarot Reader brought it to my apartment. It’s symbolic that I’m covering up my nakedness with it.

ANALYST

I remember the NDE well. It was during our first August break. I always had the chain in mind of the abortion, accident and the death. Too much for one person, too close in kind to keep in mind.

Her case was haunted from the beginning by a question of belief. Vera, articulated, desperately, how much she needed to believe that I believed her, needed me to indicate that we shared the same beliefs, and asked that I validate what she was saying as the truth.

I have it written down that she made a comment about how she was always mourning a twin sister lost at Birth, and went on to suggest that she wasn't sure if it was a literal loss or more of a metaphorical one, but it had a structuring effect and was a key feature in her remembering her history. I continue to notice how this first narration she offered came up again and again in different relationships with women others, also intense and intimate and transformative in different ways.

The tarot reader & blondie especially. *

The idea of the lost twin sister always informed how i thought about the work with her. She was so often experiencing this feeling of connection being life or death.

That’s the reason she wrote me so much, I gather. *

*And then she disappeared into the spirit world. She was no longer talking to humans, just her dead niece & an italian guide born in 1902 called Gina.*

TAROT READER

yeah it looks like Gina came to you in the time when you were having a breakdown.

And it looks like she did come to you because she was pregnant and all of that, and she didn't want you to be confused about this relationship or anything like that.

It looks like she wants you to get in touch with your own magic as well that's come across as well, and she also wants to show you different sides of things and so you can actually see things more create clearly and not worry so much.

I think she's going to be very decisive and just wants to give you quick clear answers, but she doesn't look bad. She looks protective actually, a little overly protective. Because she feels like you need to be protected.

She looks she looks OK I wouldn't be wary of her she's genuine.

It looks like she just wants to give you a clear answers.

I think with her she's been through that, she knows what they are.

And she does very much care about you, and the baby.

VERA

but now I'm working with Gina who is one of my main Spirit guides who I understand connected to me in italy.

The tarot reader said Gina is a real guide. she said I can trust Gina's info but that spirit's sense of time is a little off so it's just going to take James a little while still.

Gina told me James would be shot.

Four times.

I have to do more research on this so I can understand it in more depth. but I have another spirit, Gina, who I've been talking to since I got back and she's very protective of me.

She too was pregnant.I guess that’s why she connected to me, according to my reading.

it's helpful to have a human who knows the spirit world to validate it all.

It was Gina Who woke me yesterday with thoughts of Blondie.

LIZA

And then she started to fall.

the first fall was hours after coming back from the funeral. the funeral will be the last place that she would go without the painting. it was always with her.

VERA

Gina says that all the Falls are connected to past traumas but that this was a slam to the ground of realization that I need to be done with my family. she's been saying this ever since I went to Italy.

Gina wants me to write my father a letter asking for a settlement for what he has put me through.

the gun is still happening Gina says.

Now I just work with Gina and my niece and the baby.

the funny thing is when I went back to the pharmacy I ended up pulling out Gina for the Polish woman who runs it, because her brother had died while I was in Italy and she wanted to know if he was okay. so I asked Gina if he had to send it in front of the woman and if he was okay. he was, he wasn't in the store, but he was okay and the woman was beside herself with joy to witness that. she hugged me so hard. it's the third or fourth time I've done that with a stranger. I told my analyst this morning.

Gina says we're done.

I haven't been talking to anyone at all besides my analyst and Gina and Stella.

Did I tell you Gina was born in 1902? I'm working with an Italian strega.

You're not going to believe this. this is not alternate world. I just learned from gina, my main guide, that my father sexually abused me. I don't know what to do. I obviously will let the tarot reader look at it first to verify it, but it makes sense why he flipped when I faced him at the funeral. he knew it was coming probably.

Gina says I can bring him to court.

There's only one living person who knows according to gina, the mistress Laura who was basically like my big sister.

I just have to trust that Gina would not lead me on a wild goose chase.

By the way Gina says James and I are moving to Carroll Gardens. and that we will marry next summer.

Gina says you have rich white girl privilege.

so I asked Gina if there was something more to my Falls. yes, she said. I was eight. he had just taught me to ride my bike. he took the training wheels off and the next day I landed mouth first two teeth on the ground. that's when I started falling.

ANALYST

Falling is the trauma of the father.

VERA

I have been falling over and over since, unable to speak. Falls and fucked up teeth.

(VERA is in a Gina trance, repeating everything she’s hearing to everyone around her.)

Gina has been telling me for 2 months he's getting a divorce and coming to live with me.

Gina just told me Blondie wished I would get hit by a car. remember in October Gina told me that Blondie would drive me insane?

Gina has been giving me exact dates for things. Gina says she's willing to look at stuff whenever you want. Gina wants you to understand she is preparing me to do my work.

Gina told me James would be shot.

No, I don't think Gina is fucking with me at all. Why would you say that?

(She turns to the TAROT READER.)

VERA

The painting is Gina. she just told me. when it came into my home... July 24th I think, I started to shift, and that's when my magic started and my connection to the spirit realm began to deepen. Gina has been working on me this whole time, through tarot, through the painting, through necromancy. she's my protector, she and Stella, and when you brought her into my home the transformation started. it wasn't the lachesis or Italy per se.

it was the painting.

THE TAROT READER

((smiling at her duplicitously) The story continues to unfold.

VERA

*I revisited my Google cal of spring 2017 and sure enough there were blocked off days where I went to three hotels in a row, because Stella said Blondie was on the hunt to get me arrested in Brooklyn and Gina aka the painting was insisting I'd make $1,400 a day easy, working in a Connecticut Hotel. it was the first time I was convinced to bring the painting with me. and we were there for 10 days straight. imagine 10 days with the painting witnessing all you do and a psychic estranged boyfriend telling you the contents of his heart, and a dead 9-year-old niece as a companion. almost every moment of my day and night belong to them.

but overall, I consulted Gina about everything. about possible clients, about how many days to stay, about the payoff check that I was always being promised. about what to do about psychic james. about how everything I was being told was true. the tarot reader had said Gina was a Strega, some sort of spiritual Master teacher, and so when Gina said I needed to do some sort of Sex Magic Ritual for the day witnessed by all the pictures in front of the window so the sun would shine on me, I followed her instructions to the letter.

now I realize it was for better lighting.

remembering the details of being on the hotel carpet, surrounded by important pictures.

if Stella said it, it must be true.

But if Gina said it, it was the word of God.

Once Upon a Time in 2017, Gina told me Stella was a big fat liar and possessed by the devil and purposely misleading me.

it got me in a lot of trouble.

Gina told me that I needed to banish her. I was told I had no choice.

She told me to cut up all her pictures, look up how to perform a banishment, go to the roof and banish my niece.

Gina said she would basically go to a reform school on the other side, but for my own good I needed to send her away.

(feels Stella talking to her)

Are you saying Liza was involved when I was told to banish and burn your pictures?

( She is enraged. It takes her a minute to calm down.)

I still have some of what was burned. kept the remains with the charcoal locked in a box. call me a Masochist. *

GGG2

There's more to the picture than meets the eye. (lyric message)

(Blackout.)

Addendum: Ask “Gina” about the things she told me about my dad. And how in heaven, families are different.

Oh wait, the families are different thing Katie just reminded me was fakekatie. That’s an important detail.

And to the Tarot Reader’s LP, sorry you got dragged into this. I know you had nothing to do with it.

“As clear as a cut crystal painting”

#gina

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kleinstar · 5 days ago

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Eiden's looking everything unfold from his seat at defendant's table. He's nervous, to say the least. His future here is hanging on the line here, his and potentially his business too...

First speaks the prosecutor - a handsome guy that makes a pretty good display of himself. Strangely enough he feels almost a little irritated looking and hearing him speak. He wonders if it's just because he stands in the opposing camp but even then, he's just doing his job isn't he...? Even if he's definitely picking his words a little dramatically...

Focused to the other camp Eiden only barely hears Yuri's turn so when the hall goes quiet he doesn't realize at first. It's when he feels the eyes on him that he snaps back to the present, bouncing up to his feet.

" Defendant please walk over to witness stand. "

" AH yeah! I'm going! I'm... uh! Right! "

He feels the eyes still at him as he walks over to the stand, plopping down to his seat as he slowly begins recounting that evening. The procedure begins with the judge asking him to introduce himself.

" Uhh, I'm Eiden Itadori, 23 years old, single -- oh you don't need that information, I guess haha" , Eiden awkwardly laughs, " um, so uh. I own a business called SP*T, that's .... the O's an asterisk. It's an adult toy store."

That's ... probably everything that's needed - the judge turns to asking about the what happened as well. There is just one problem... There really isn't much to tell in the first place.

" I mean... not much to be honest? I was at work late, getting preparations done for the next day and I was just leaving home when my foot hit something.. "

" I looked down at him like 'dude what are you okay' and squatted down to check him and ... well, there was no pulse so I called the police? I mean that's where you call when you find a dead body right? "

He dots dots.

" So is there anything else I should say...? "

@hollowfaith > @darkenforcer

November 20, 9:35AM Archimedes Ward Court Courtroom No. 4

—

「⚖️」 "Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, good morning. My name is Aurelius Vane-Tempest, and it is my pleasure to represent the city of Spirale as a prosecutor on this tragic case."

As the din in the gallery died down, the bespectacled blond lawyer read off his opening remarks to both judge and jury.

"On November 15th, 2024, the defendant in this matter, a Mr. Eiden Itadori, was found on the steps of SP*T besides the dead body of Mr. Ron Mann, well-known family man and beloved philanthropist to the community. Mr. Mann was determined to have died from blunt force trauma to the cranial region from a weaponized toy sold on Mr. Itadori's premises."

His voice was smooth and even, carrying no inflection besides the ones needed for dramatic effect. There was a storybook quality to the way he detailed the crime, the collection of the body, and the charges pressed against Eiden afterwards.

"Ladies and gentlemen, this is a case about a man who could not control his strength, who lost his cool at a crucial moment to commit involuntary manslaughter on the unlucky victim. Despite this, justice must be upheld."

"At the conclusion of the case, and after you have heard all the evidence, we are confident that you will return a verdict of guilty."

Thus finished, the angel prosecutor set down his papers and politely indicated to the judge that the defense could go next.

Today, the case of Eiden Itadori vs. The City of Spirale was formally in session.

@darkenforcer > @kleinstar ໒꒱

#hollowfaith #hollowfaith16 #darkenforcer #darkenforcer10 #18altallergory #ehehe how's that for the most awesome testimony ever?#no?

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celestialarchon · 4 years ago

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Celebrating 600+ Followers

i can’t believe i’m writing another celebration post less than two days after my first

this has been rotting in my head all day and might become a series in the future

Genshin Impact x F!Reader | Modernish AU | warning: it’s cute!

“I hope you don’t mind, we gave you a student teacher as well. It’s only fair since you were given the most troublesome class,” Headmistress Ping smiled at you warmly.

“Ah,” You nodded, “Thats fine.”

The elder woman patted your back, “Genshin Academy is truly lucky to have you. Your track record is impressive and you have an extremely rare vision. I think you’ll get along fairly well with Mr. Aether, he’s a good kid.”

You smiled at her, honored by her words. Genshin Academy, the elite and prestigious school, had taken you as a teacher. The education system was impressive and diverse, teaching elementary to college aged students. You were given the first year elementary school students and now a student teacher as well. No matter how troublesome the class may be, having assistance would be appreciated. If it didn’t, the extraordinary pay would make up for any issues you had.

The older woman walked you to the doors of the building and then left you to prepare yourself. Clutching your class roster, you stepped in and made your way to your classroom. When you entered your room, you were greeted by a young blonde man. He introduced himself as your assistant teacher and made some small talk before leaving you to prepare for the day. You appreciated his thoughtfulness as you tidied the room up a bit, smiling at your class pet, Dvalin.

Soon enough, the children poured in and greeted each other and you. Aether returned to the room, beaming at each child. You took attendance, ticking off each name as they all answered. Qiqi, Teucer, Klee, and Diona seemed to be the most lively of them all. They were also marked with asterisks as the worst “troublemakers” but so far things were running smoothly.

“Welcome, my name is Miss Bright,” You beamed at the children, “Let’s have a good year, okay?”

“Wow, you’re very pretty Miss Bright!” An energetic Teucer exclaimed.

Klee squealed, “I’m so excited!”

Diona scoffed and Qiqi nodded in agreement. You went through the motions, following your detailed curriculum perfectly. There were two separate general subjects, academics and control. One was simple enough, teaching the kids by the book. The other was all about assisting your students in controlling and growing their abilities as vision users.

By the end of the day you were exhausted. Soon enough the week flew by. As Friday came, you were exhausted. Most people had made these kids out to be terrible and mischievous, and in some ways they were. Yet, you had already grown very fond of all of them. They were much more tame than you had expected, save for some explosions and outbursts. Now you were stuck as some of the children were late being picked up.

“I hope my big brother gets a girlfriend like Miss Bright. She’s so nice and pretty.” You overheard Teucer whisper to the last three kids.

“Oh yeah!” Klee’s whispers weren’t whispers at all, “She’s like a princess. My brother is a prince. I wish he’d marry Miss Bright.”

“Tch,” Diona intervened, “Honestly, I wish Miss Bright had adopted me instead of that annoying man at home.”

“Qiqi thinks Xiao and Zhongli would like Miss Bright a lot.”

You giggled at their words, they were too sweet. Aether chuckled overhearing them as well and waving you off.

“Go finish up your paperwork, I’ll take care of them.” The cheerful blonde nearly pushed you out the door.

You sighed and made your way to the office up front. Paperwork was such a drag, not nearly as fun as over hearing those brats gossiping. The paperwork ended up taking up the rest of your time. By the time you were done you wanted to scream. As you left the office, a handful of coworkers approached you and invited you out. No was not an option as they insisted you let them treat you.

You were exhausted as they led you to their favorite bar. Aether followed like a lost puppy and you sighed.

“You can’t drink can you?” You questioned him.

“Ahhh,” Aether started but was interrupted.

“It’s fine! I know the owner. He doesn’t have to drink he can just babysit us.” Venti exclaimed.

Poor Aether couldn’t get out of it either. Once you entered the bar, things blurred. Immediately, your coworkers bought you many drinks. Venti was especially aggressive about drinking. The short music teacher was babbling to an extremely handsome bartender with vibrant red hair.

The scarlet haired man seemed to be a bit annoyed by the drunken chaos ensuing. Amber was giggling crazily and the school nurse, Baizhu had cornered a tall man with amber eyes, and Ganyu was petting you. Aether was awkwardly fidgeting, stone cold sober. Eventually, your poor student teacher ended up having to call a cab and carry you home. He was forced to try and navigate to your cozy apartment by unlocking your phone with your drunken face. It took way too many attempts.

You awoke the next day with a pounding headache and over a hundred notifications. The night was still a blur so you proceeded to try and take care of yourself. Aether was kind enough to go out and buy you some pain medicine and left it on your counter with your keys. It was embarrassing how you couldn’t find any memories of your adventures in liquor.

The weekend flew by until Sunday night came and your phone buzzed. You looked down and horror filled your body. Tomorrow was parent conferences. It wasn’t mandatory for parents but encouraged. Suddenly, you were tearing through your apartment trying to prepare for the upcoming doom.

||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||

Before you knew it, parent conferences were upon you. Aether wasn’t attending because it wasn’t mandatory and you insisted he go home and rest. He had done so much for you already, you didn’t want him to suffer through it with you. You looked up as somebody knocked on your class door and opened it to see two beautiful blondes.

“Hello, is this Miss Bright’s room?” The woman’s blue eyes met yours.

“Yes,” You held your hand out, “Hello, I’m Miss Bright.”

The woman shook your hand, “I am Jean, Klee’s guardian. This is her older brother Albedo.”

The young man’s beautiful eyes bore into you as he shook your hand. You stepped aside and gestured to the tables in your room. The two took their seats and almost immediately a tall red haired man sauntered up to you.

“Hello!” His tone was cheerful, “I’m Childe, Teucer’s older brother!”

“A pleasure to meet you, Childe. I am Miss Bright.”

“Ah,” a crooked smile formed on his lips, “The pleasure is all mine. You are just as beautiful as Teucer claimed.”

You blushed and laughed nervously, but before you could answer he was shoved into your room. He turned to glare at the two dark haired men in the doorway. Huffing, he found his way to a table and sat.

“So annoying.” The shorter of the two men scowled.

The taller one sighed, “Hello, Miss Bright. My name is Zhongli, and this is my cousin Xiao. We are Qiqi’s foster family.”

Xiao stomped past you, Zhongli followed him quickly. You didn’t have time to introduce yourself to either of them before they sat down.

“How rude,” A smooth voice came from your door.

Two men stood there, a tan man with dark hair and a very familiar red head. Internally, you groaned at the sight of the bartender. It was going to be a long conference wasn’t it? You were glad you had organized your agenda so well.

“Diluc. Guardian of Diona, and this is my brother Kaeya.” The redhead said almost sternly.

He strolled through the doorway to sit at a table, all four families spread out. Kaeya winked at you and followed his brother. Now you were sure the night would be long.

No other families came, and you were left alone with the strange bunch. In the back of your mind, you were thinking of your roster and the asterisks. The irony in all of it was that the troublemaker’s parents were the only ones who showed. The room was quiet, families only talking among themselves. You cleared your throat and introduced yourself once more, starting in to your very planned speech.

A short time had passed but it felt like years to you. You felt incredibly awkward but continued on. Childe raised his hand which nearly made you laugh but you contained your amusement and paused.

“Yes?” You called out to him.

The lanky man smirked, “I’m sorry but what sort of vision do you use?”

“I will address that later on.” Your voice was kind but also stern.

This response earned several looks from the families listening. All of a sudden, their full attention was on you. The change of atmosphere had put you on edge. You tried to continue on but Childe stood abruptly.

“That’s an interesting response.” He chuckled.

“Tartaglia!” Jean intervened, “Thats enough.”

Kaeya kicked his feet up on the table, “You can’t say you’re not curious though, right? It’s only natural we want to know. This school has just as much focus on vision skills as academic skills.”

You were beginning to grow irritated. The children were more respectful than the adults. Composing yourself, you sighed. Nobody denied Kaeya’s words, although Zhongli and Jean seemed to disapprove of the attitude.

“As i said before i will-“ you were interrupted again by an arrow of water, you easily side stepped it.

Jean stood, sword in hand and glared at Childe. Diluc shoved his brother’s feet off the table and scowled. Albedo yawned while Xiao clicked his tongue. Zhongli merely observed the scene. Childe cackled at Jean which only angered her more as she dove at him.

You opened your mouth to say something but were forced to dodge a cold sword. Kaeya grinned at you but was yanked back by Zhongli. The room was in utter chaos. You gritted your teeth and once more tried to remain calm. Another arrow narrowly missed your ear and you felt yourself become enraged. Kaeya dodged Zhongli and thrust his sword at you but was stopped by a sharp pillar of light.

“That’s enough.” Your voice was cold as you used your own weapon to shove the pushy cryo wielder away from you.

As if by magic, suddenly everyone stopped to stare at you. Quickly, they sat down. Albedo’s eyes were alert now, he was suddenly interested in every word you had to say. Even Xiao seemed to have a better attitude.

You continued your speech without any further interruptions. Finally, the end was in sight.

“And to answer your earlier question,” You pushed your hair back behind your ear to reveal your vision on an earring, “I am a light wielder. I will not take any questions on it. Have a wonderful night and thank you for coming.”

You turned and exited your classroom quickly as murmurs spread across the room. Light visions were only gifted to those who were recognized by multiple gods. Light was a strange element that could mold itself and change to take shape of different elements, although it wasn’t perfect. Elemental mastery took a lot of time and the light could only bend to your will for short periods of time. Using light as anything other than itself could backfire easily. Ontop of the many complications, attaining a light vision meant going through a crisis so terrible that multiple gods had to intervene. It was a blessing and a curse.

As you headed home, shivers ran down your back. You couldn’t help but feel that you were being watched or followed. You shook it off and returned home. It was just paranoid thoughts after a rough night.

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After the conference, you seemed to be plagued by the families. Outside of work you ran into them constantly. It was nerve wracking.

“Miss Bright, Teucer loves you so much. He’d love to see you on the weekend. We could get lunch and then have a play date with him. What do ya say?” Childe grinned at you as you exited your classroom.

“Sorry, sir” An arm slid around your shoulders, “But i’m afraid she has plans for this weekend.”

You looked up to see the school librarian with a tight smile. Lisa was so kind, saving you from his shameless flirting. Although, she often seemed to flirt with you as well. You couldn’t really tell if she was being nice or flirting though.

He scowled and turned. Lisa laughed and squeezed you tighter. She escorted you out of the building, telling you about the new books the library had just received. Her eyes twinkled as you laughed at her puns and asked her questions about being a librarian.

“Excuse me,” A deep voice said “May I have a moment of Miss Bright’s time?”

You turned to see Zhongli, one of the only reasonable guardians you’d met. So far you’d not seen him after the meeting so you felt safer around him. Even Jean had appeared before you several times, though it didn’t seem intentional. You weren’t entirely sure but you’d swore you’d even seen Xiao lurking around when you were out.

“Of course,” You waved Lisa off.

She frowned and kissed your cheek before sauntering off. Zhongli raised his eyebrows as you laughed, clearly embarrassed. The nerve of that woman sometimes.

“Sorry, she’s a friend but she’s very affectionate,” you apologized quickly.

“Hm,” Zhongli nodded and stared at you intently, “I’m sorry to bother you but is there a way I could schedule another meeting with you? I would like to hear about Qiqi’s progress.”

Your heart nearly melted. He was so kind and it was refreshing.

“Of course! How about this weekend?” You beamed at him.

The two of you scheduled a conference lunch and parted ways. From afar, Diluc grimaced. He was curious about Diona’s behavior in school. She was a very moody child. Furthermore, he was curious about you. Kaeya had also pestered you for a date so the scarlet haired man was trying to find the right time to ask you. He didn’t want to come off the way he was sure Kaeya did.

“I would also like to attend the meeting.” Xiao announced to Zhongli once he got into the car.

“Too bad,” Zhongli chuckled “It’s one on one, you’ll have to schedule your own.”

Xiao huffed at his words. He disliked the idea of the two of you doing anything one on one. He couldn’t decide whether he was jealous of you or Zhongli. He decided it was you, since both Qiqi and Zhongli seemed to be infatuated with you. He clicked his tongue, Zhongli merely smiled, and Qiqi demanded coco goat milk.

“Does she like science?” Albedo questioned Klee.

“Miss Bright likes a lot of things I think.” Klee said, ice cream smeared on her face.

“I want to know more.” Albedo stated.

Klee grinned, “More ice cream?”

Albedo nodded, only hoping Jean wouldn’t catch them.

This new job had many opportunities open up for you. With so many people in pursuit of you, who would you choose?

#genshin impact #genshin impact xiao #genshin x reader #xiao x reader #genshin impact imagines #albedo x reader #jean x reader #genshin impact zhongli #zhongli x reader #master diluc #diluc x reader #kaeya x reader #genshin lisa #genshin liyue #genshin mondstadt

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xxdereksfanficsxx · 3 years ago

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Spamton/Male reader part 2

Sorry if this chapter is a little short. I am sick right now, so I wrote most of it feeling... Pretty hazy. It's not covid though, thankfully! If anyone cares, haha, but yeah, this chapter may not be up to par with my normal stuff, but I really, really wanted to get something out for you guys. I posted a couple parts of my other fic in progress, because I already had some stuff written out, but I only had part one up for this one, so here is part two :)

Pairing: Spamton/Male reader

TW: None for this part

Summary of part 2: Spamton starts spending a little more time than you'd like on the phone. He agrees to something a little shady, and conveniently does not mention it to you- you begin to feel a little sad with the sudden lack of attention from your boyfriend, but he makes it up to you.

Disclaimer: I don't own the character or series

I'm putting the beginning of part 1 here, up to the smut scene, for any readers that want the story, but not the smut, so if you've read part 1, feel free to skip this part- this recap will be separated from the beginning of this part (part 2) by three rows of asterisks- if you've read part 1, you can skip to there.

You hit the button, and crossed the street when the traffic stopped to let you pass. Almost there… Just another couple of blocks, and you finally saw Spamton on the corner, waiting for you. Your lips curled into a small smile, when he saw you, and waved you over.

“It feels like it’s been forever!” Spamton cried out, as you approached, a grin on his face. You were only gone for a week, on some business, but the other man was always eager to see you… You. You were his world, nobody supported him like you did, nobody believed that he was anything but a flop, except for you. Spamton was incredibly lucky to have you.

“I missed you, Spamton,” You replied to him, scooping him into a tight embrace, burying your face into the crook of his neck. You inhaled, having missed his scent; he smelled of cheap cologne and cigarettes, and something else that you could never place, but you couldn’t lie, you loved it. Then, you felt his arms snake around you, hugging you back tightly, and you breathed a relaxed sigh.

“Well, shall we head home?” You asked, as you separated from him. Spamton nodded.

“Yeah, let’s go.” He responded, his hand finding yours. He loved holding your hand, and your clasped hands swung a little as you walked next to each other, making your way to the apartment.

The pair of you lived with four other Addisons, each of them couples just like yourselves. You made a decent living, but really, you were the breadwinner at the moment- living with others was just how it had to be, for now, but you were confident Spamton would make it like he always says he will. Or, mostly confident, but you kept any hesitance to yourself, because no matter what, you fully supported him, even if he was a little… Unlucky. You were never one to love somebody for their success though, no. Spamton… He always told you, it’s us against the world, no one could take you away from me, nobody could ever compare to you. You believed it. The fact that he was still whispering these things into your ear at night, after having been together for several years… He has to mean it. He made you feel loved. The world could crumble around you, but as long as he was still by your side, you would be happy.

The two of you arrived home, greeted by one of your roommates, before slinking off to your shared bedroom together. Spamton hopped up onto the bed, and patted the empty space next to him, inviting you to sit down.

“Come and sit! I’ve got some news to share with you.” Spamton beamed, and you obliged, and took a seat next to him.

“Oh really? What’s this news?” You asked, your curiosity piqued.

“Well,” Spamton started, clearing his throat. “I received this phone call while you were gone, and ___, I think this is it. I think this is my chance! To finally be a big shot!” He told you excitedly, and you lit up.

“Alright! Tell me more?” You asked, scooting closer to him, and giving him a celebratory kiss on the cheek.

“See, I haven’t actually accepted this guy’s offer yet… I kind of wanted to see what you thought first, I mean… I wouldn’t normally hesitate, I just wanted to make sure you were on board too,” Spamton said, and it made your heart flutter a little, that he cared enough about what you thought, that he would hold off on quite possibly the deal of a lifetime, just to talk to you about it first.

“Really?! Well, if you think that this is your chance, I say go for it! Shit, it’s not every day that an opportunity like that comes. And who was this guy you talked to, anyway?” You asked, getting comfortable on the bed.

“Well, his name was Mike, and he said that he had a deal for me that could change our life,” Spamton began to explain, giving you the details of this phone call he had received, just yesterday in fact, and how the guy said he would call back, expecting a decision from Spamton.

“Hm, I wonder if he’s really legitimate. That kind of success is a lot to accomplish, but if you think this is what you need to do, I say go for it,” You said to him encouragingly, after listening to his description of the phone call. Spamton lit up at this, and threw himself at you, pulling you into another tight hug.

“Oh this is great! I can feel it already! I’ll be the biggest big shot!” He chittered excitedly, and you gave him a squeeze.

“We should celebrate, then!” You laughed, kissing his neck.

***

You moved to lay your head on your chest, when all of a sudden, the phone on the nightstand rang.

******************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************

Spamton’s eyes lit up a little, and he looked at you.

“I think it’s him!” He said to you, sitting up.

“Well, pick it up then!” You encouraged, and he scooted to the edge of the bed, and leaned over the nightstand, grabbing the receiver, and bringing it to his ear. You sat in bed patiently, listening to Spamton’s side of the conversation.

“Hello?... Yes… Yes!... … … Yes, let’s make this deal happen!... Okay… Yes, I agree with all of that… … … … Great, it’s official! Pleasure to do business with you Mike, if you can really do for me what you say, I won’t let you down!” You listened to Spamton agreeing to whatever the person on the other end was saying. You noticed that Spamton wasn’t really listening, rushing through the phonecall to get this said and done, and you were hesitant to say that he really knew what he was agreeing to. This, understandably, made you feel a little uneasy. This apparently showed on your face, because when Spamton hung up the phone, and turned to look at you, he was immediately confused about your expression.

“What’s wrong, babe?” He asked, trying to push his excitement aside for a moment, to make sure you were okay.

“What? Nothing is wrong.” You replied, trying to shake off your bad feeling, replacing your look of worry with a grin. After all… You trusted Spamton. He wouldn’t make stupid decisions, right? You’d back him one hundred percent- you were probably just a little strung up from your business trip still. No reason to feel suspicious.

“Why don’t you tell me what that was about, huh? What’s he gonna have you do?” You asked, changing the subject, trying not to be too suspicious, and suddenly, Spamton was excited again.

“Well, get this- he said he’s going to give me another call tomorrow with a deal that’s going to help make me more popular! Can you believe it?! He said it will probably involve a photoshoot for a billboard, and maybe we can get a commercial done soon, for the car lot!” Spamton rambled, and you listened intently. Even though you tried to make the feeling go away, you still felt a little pang of unease, and you mentally chastised yourself- here’s your boyfriend’s chance at finally pursuing his dream, and here you were having doubts about it.

“That’s great! It’ll definitely bring in some business!” You responded. That used car lot, he was barely scraping by with, finally getting some customers in the door. It’s not that the cars were that bad. Spamton… Was a mediocre salesman, at best, making at least enough sales to contribute a little, but not for much else. The more you thought about it, the better this deal that was about to happen sounded, really. It would take a little weight off your shoulders, financially, if this pulled through- but ultimately, it was Spamton’s happiness that you cared about, and if this was going to make him happy, then you were behind him.

The next day, as promised, Spamton received his phone call. This, unbeknownst to you, was the beginning to much more than just a couple of deals to boost business. Yes, Spamton got his billboard. Then, his commercial. Then, more phone calls kept coming, in the days after. More. Phone calls. It had been only a few weeks since the first call, by now, and the calls were starting to become daily. At least Spamton seemed to be getting a lot of these offers, and business did start to really kick up… Almost as if he was becoming instantly successful.

“Hey, baby,” You said with a suave tone, slinking up to your boyfriend, and wrapping your arms around him, hands running down his chest, your chest pressed against his back. Spamton held up a finger to you.

“Hang on, babes, on the phone,” Spamton muttered to you, before going back to his phone call. You frowned a little. Not only was he on the phone every day, he was talking for hours at a time, and it made you wonder just when you were going to get your boyfriend back. You didn’t want to get in the way of him being a big shot. You didn’t. You wanted him to pursue his dreams, to be successful, to be the man he wants to be, but you didn’t realize that it was going to require… This. What was he even on the phone for so long for anyway? You let go of him, and breathed a quiet, rejected sigh, as you went to go sit down.

‘This… Is getting ridiculous…’ You thought to yourself, curling up on the couch, alone again.

“Now, I’m going to need you to carry out some business for me. Think you can do that? I’ll keep the offers coming, Spamton. All I need is compliance, and success will continue to grow and be yours. If you want it.” Mike enticed over the phone, Spamton nodding along until there was a pause for him to speak.

“Of course! What do you need me to do? Anything, I’ll do it!” He responded, and Mike chuckled softly on the other end.

“Wonderful. I need you to deliver a special package for me… I will call tomorrow with details. Please, be on standby in the morning.” Mike said, and Spamton affirmed that he would be awaiting his call, before finally hanging up the phone. This was the first time Mike ever asked Spamton for any favors, in return for everything Mike was doing for him- of course he would be willing to deliver whatever this package was for him. It was only right, considering this guy has made him more popular than ever. Even the roommates were starting to take notice of Spamton’s sudden influx of sales, his advertisements… After all, how could they not, when they were plastering Spamton’s face on every other corner?

Spamton walked the apartment, feeling like a million bucks, as he looked to find where you had went. He felt quite accomplished after this phone call- this must be solidifying him as someone who deserves the success that Mike was so generously bestowing upon him.

“___! Hey, guess wha-... What’s wrong?” Spamton asked, concern overtaking his originally upbeat tone, as he finally found you, still curled up on the couch. You lifted your head, looking at him, and inviting him over to sit by you, patting the empty cushion next to you.

“Nothing, just… You’ve been on the phone with that guy an awful lot lately. What are you even talking about for all that time? I mean… You’ve been kind of pushing me away for it lately… I know this is super important to you, and I don’t want to get in the way of that-” You responded, before he interjected.

“What?! You’re not in the way of anything, don’t talk like that!” Spamton dove in for a hug.

“Look, I… I’m sorry, you’re right, maybe I am spending a little too much time on the phone… Listen, baby, I’m expecting a call from him tomorrow, and then I have to… Run an errand, and I promise, I’ll try not to stay caught up for so long, okay?” He continued, looking up at you with big eyes. You wavered a little, opening your arms, and holding him.

“Okay. I’m sorry, I just… The transition from having your full attention, to you being just… Busy all the time, it’s a little harder than I thought.” You said softly, giving him a squeeze, and he squeezed you back.

“I know, I didn’t even think it would be like this. I didn’t know that Mike was being so literal when he said he would make me an ‘instant success’.” Spamton replied, resting his head against your shoulder. It definitely showed, that neither of you were really ready for this, but nonetheless, Spamton was happy, making more money, and more popular than ever, and him being happy, you couldn’t help but be happy too. You just hoped that He would stick to his word, and try to make a little time for you, off the phone. You thought about what he said… You briefly wondered about his errand, but decided not to push, instead opting to revel in the comfortable silence between the two of you, in each other’s arms.

Spamton trailed a few stray kisses along your jaw, before nuzzling his face into your neck. You hummed, uncurling a little, and relaxing into the couch, your boyfriend adjusting adjusting himself so that he was laying on top of you, getting cozy again.

“So, big shot,” You started, breaking the silence after a while. “Would you like to go out for some dinner? I think we deserve it.” You said to him, Spamton tilting his head to look at you, chin resting on your sternum. His face was dusted a very light pink, at the nickname.

“It’s on me, handsome,” He replied, beaming a little- it wasn’t often that dinner was on him, though you wondered if it will become a more often occurrence, now that he had more funds to his name- it almost made you feel a little uncomfortable, the idea of Spamton paying for all of it.

With that, the two of you broke apart, and began to get ready for dinner, agreeing to dress a little on the nicer side- it had been a while since you had gotten to go on a proper date together, afterall, and after this it was going to be a nice way to just unwind together.

#spamton x male reader #spamton x reader #reader insert #male reader #deltarune x male reader #deltaruined #deltarune x reader #x reader #x male reader

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wrestlezon · 3 years ago

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if you look into it, cm punk has a looooot of history, and most of it is being antagonistic or antihero-esque. that history isn't going to go away, it exists. he's been gone for a long time, though, and now that he's back, we don't really know what parts of that history cm punk is still willing to draw from*, or what kind of story he wants to tell or whatever. so looking at what we've seen in aew so far...

we have eddie call punk out for being a low-life scumbag two-faced narcissistic bitch (LMAO). attention audience! this nice mild-mannered older dude is not what he seems! eddie is the realest guy around and you'd be a fool to not pay attention to what he says, but his credibility is affected by the fact that he is a hothead with a lot of personal baggage and is constantly getting himself in trouble. (it is a shame we only got 1 backstage bit, 1 promo, 1 ppv match between these two but boy were they good) (btw eddie rules)

cm punk's entire feud with mjf was basically about how mjf was deeply inspired by ring of honor-era cm punk and his work from back then, and how disappointed mjf was that punk is standing around with his edges rounded off, being all soft, pretending to be a good guy when he's doing non-good guy stuff under the table. why bother being two-faced? cut out the middleman, be evil! but, you know, mjf is also a heel, and thus is a very unreliable narrator, so we don't know how much we should trust about what he is saying. the two of them also spend most of their feud quoting roh-era punk promos back and forth between each other (lmao) so all that material is very much "in consideration."

hangman's deal was that he didnt respect or trust punk to be a good champion, he thought punk was full of pettiness and cowardice and acted differently when (he thought) nobody was looking. in their last face-to-face promo, hangman threatened to unmask punk for who he was (a Bad Guy), but decide against it because he doesn't want to stoop to doing the same hateful petty things cm punk is known for doing. He's better than that. hangman said with bigtime conviction that he loves AEW, he cares about this place because its his home, and that he wouldn't be defending the championship from punk but rather all of AEW from him! why say this...?

cm punk's original summer of punk moment was him winning the roh championship, revealing that he played everyone for a fool, and that he hated their guts, and was going to take the ROH championship title away from everyone by bringing it with him to wwe. he mocked the promotion by signing his wwe contract on the title! and if nobody could defeat him in time to take the title back, it'd be lost forever!! real villain stuff. a lot of disrespect!! a similar thing happened in wwe too, with the world title and punk's contract expiring.

hangman wanted to stop the aew title from gettin' into the hands of a guy who, traditionally, turned on everyone the moment he got a big championship title. but he had to choose between having to win dirty or lose clean, and he made his sacrifice. (if punk was in that situation, would he make that same choice? probably not!! )

now punk's the champion. now what? is he going to instantly turn on us now, like history repeating itself? will he keep hiding it as long as he can, until someone pulls his mask off? or is punk a changed man, a good guy now, like how he's been claiming? will he stay that way, or have a fall from grace, tempted back into his old habits?

if he's gonna be a genuine good guy, he's going to have to fight his own legacy every step of the way and prove it over and over.

listen. look. i need you to understand. look at this.

SLOUCHED. HANDS BEHIND HIS BACK. HEAD BENT DOWN. cm punk spends most of his promo at this point AVOIDING EYE CONTACT. he never even holds the goddamn mic!!! punk is posturing SO hard to appear as a small harmless creature. so much smaller than hangman.

which he factually ISNT. i mean, look at how he looks when he stands up straight, when he isn't trying to put on an appearance.

its offensive when you know someone is so transparently trying to be deceptive right to your face. but the difference between genuine and fake is so minute, so subtle, its hard to describe and point out without looking like youre nitpicking. if you know then you Know. if you don't, then you fall for the trick. and let me tell you, the number of people who can tell the difference are in the minority.

punk saying "i dont know why youre taking this so personally, why are you being so defensive for No Reason :/?" while displaying all these infrared DANGER flags to hangman, and then we have tony schiavone going "seems like theres a lot of respect here!" LMAO

hangman page is the AEW champion and hes the underdog here. can you believe that? the crowd is cheering for beloved supercelebrity cm punk. in this promo, he said he wanted to beat punk at his own game (talking) and he fuckin LOST. he tried to be the better man and he got PLAYED.

THIS RULES

#talkzon #oh jeez. this is lengthy #long post #personally? i think this whole deal is gonna pan out slowburn style #either in a ''i was secretly evil this whole time! lol!!!'' way or in a ''i tried to be good. but i succumbed to the dark temptations'' way #but u know what? if he comes out on weds and is like ''lol owned idiots haha im evil now fuck u all im da best'' then i cant even be mad #oh man sorry if this is too all over the place i have like 4 different thesis statements to talk about at any given time and like...#idk how to cohesively blend that into a smoothly written article. i am not some sort of... editorialist #i have too many thoughts and ideas to put down in linear order #oh yeah calling back to that asterisk from the beginning:#*nobody will ever bring up colt cabana and punk's longtime history together in-character. i am extremely confident in saying this #w/ how severe their irl falling out was and how neither mjf or hangman mentioned anything about it (despite imo having ample reason to)#i think that whole thing is completely off the table FOREVER

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tinyboxxtink · 3 years ago

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"Clueless" *Part 3*

Okay so my dog ended up being totally fine, and luckily I had most of this written beforehand. <3

PS- REALLY shouldn't have watched the actual movie while writing this...lulz. Count how many actual lines from the movie you catch.

Part 1

Part 2

Part 4

Tag List:

@lolliepopsicle

@chasingeverybreakingwave

@wanniiieeee

@milkshqke

@gibbs274

@aprildecker-blog

@objection-argumentative

@word-scribbless

@stars-in-the-skies-world

-----

He drove back up the Beach House, but you and Ariel had abandoned it for a loft in the city, no forwarding address. He asked himself why he was putting so much effort just to get back in contact with you. He couldn’t explain it, it was like something against logic.

He dialed Ariel’s number.

IGNORE.

Redial.

IGNORE.

Text: “Answer your phone!!!”

Redial.

“What do you want?”

“I want to talk to Y/N,”

“Well she doesn't want to talk to you,”

“What did you tell her, Ariel?”

“The truth,”

“I don’t...I can’t even begin to imagine what that means in your language,”

“Oh whatever Raf, what does it matter what I told her? She’s MY friend, not yours!”

“You don’t OWN her Ariel,”

“Don’t I?” She smirked. “I feed her, I clothe her, I give her a roof to sleep under. I even gave her a cute necklace with her name on it, like a collar,” she smirked.

"You're evil," he sneered.

“I’m a saint,” She scoffed. “Do you know where that girl would be without me? Do you know the years it would take in a therapist's office to heal the emotional trauma I so selflessly saved her from? Her life will be enriched and better because of me, how many girls can say that about you?"

“Oh right, like helping her hasn’t served you any purpose?”

“What purpose could it possibly have?”

“Please, if I ever saw you do anything less than 90% selfish I’d die of shock,”

“Oh that would be reason enough for me,”

“Look, I get it. You've never had a mother so you're treating her like your personal Barbie doll,"

“And what, you wanna be her Prince Ken? Or, lawyer Ken,”

“She’s NOT a Barbie doll!”

“You’re right, she’s not. So I’m not going to let you play with her emotions,”

“What does that even mean? For fuck’s sake Ariel, I just want to be her mentor,”

“Really?” Rafael could hear her rolling her eyes through the phone. “You’re trying THIS hard to mentor some girl you met less than 24 hours ago? REALLY,” She chuckled.

“I may not be ‘Harvard’ smart BRO, but I’m not stupid. I know when a guy has let’s say, less than moral intentions with a girl,”

“It’s not like that,” He growled. “She’s a sweet girl, Ariel. And I’m not going to let you try and change her into your clone,”

“Wha--my clone? Please, Raf she could NEVER reach my level. Believe me, I’ve tried for four years. She’s a good sidekick,”

“This isn’t over,”

“Isn’t it? You have ZERO idea where we are,”

“Please, there’s maybe 5 places in Manhattan you’ll go, and they’re all on the Upper East Side. It’s not hard,”

“Well then, I guess we’ll see who’s better at hide and seek!”

CLICK.

------

Ariel rolled her eyes with a smile just as you walked in the living room.

“Who was that?” You asked, toweling your hair from the shower you had just exited.

“Mom,” She rolled her eyes. “She wanted to make sure we weren’t tearing this place up,”

“Oh?” You asked, suddenly hopeful. “Was she going to ask Rafael to check?”

“What? NO,” Ariel shut down that thought quickly. “I assured her she didn’t need to send that dog over here to sniff around you anymore,”

“Ariel,” You rolled your eyes with a sigh. “I’m a big girl,”

“I know sweetie,” She walked over and scrunched your face. “Such a big girl,”

“Whatever,” You rolled your eyes again walking back to the bedroom.

“Hey…” Ariel grabbed the TV remote. “Do you wanna watch Clueless?”

“What? ….Why?”

“I don’t know, you mentioned it yesterday and now I can’t stop thinking about a young Paul Rudd,”

“....Who looks exactly like present Paul Rudd,” You laughed.

“I know right? I want the magic face cream he must use,” She giggled as you both sat down on the couch to watch the movie.

----

“See, Cher isn’t a bad person, right? She saved Tai,” Ariel gestured to the TV.

“Am I Tai in this situation?” You eyed her.

“Well, yeah,” She shrugged. “Duh,”

“I’ll take it, I love Brittany Murphy,” You shrugged.

“RIP,” Ariel made a sign of the cross with a kiss looking up to heaven. “We should pour one out for her,”

“On your mom’s thousand dollar rug?”

“Okay, so maybe just pour one for us,”

Her phone vibrated wildly; it vibrated so hard it fell off the coffee table onto the floor. You picked it up to put it back, but you happened to glance at the screen.

BHOLE BARBA: You can’t keep her from me forever, Ariel

Wha….keep who from him? You? Did...was he...did Ariel….?

“Alright, who’s ready for mimosas?!” Ariel said in a singsongy voice as she returned with two flutes of champagne.

“What is this?” You held the phone up to her. She read it, her eyes grew wide.

“I...He’s talking about the Adele CD I borrowed from him forever ago, he’s weirdly possessive about ‘her’,”

“Ariel,” You interrupted her with a stern face.

“What?” She played dumb.

“...How could you do this to me?” You asked with a hurt expression.

“Do what?” She rolled her eyes with a laugh. “Protect you from my loser ex brother?”

“You--! Oh my god,” You couldn’t believe it. Your own best friend was trying to mess with your happiness?

“Oh come on Y/N, it’s not that big of a--” She rolled her eyes with a laugh, pissing you off even more.

“It IS a big deal!” Tears stung your eyes, you hated that you started crying when you got angry. How pathetic was that?

“Why? You can’t possibly be in love with him or something,” She scoffed.

“NO! Of course not,” You crossed your arms. “But he could help me with school, with my career! Don’t you want me to get a good job, eventually move out of here?”

“Maybe I don’t!” She yelled suddenly.

“...What?” You asked in disbelief.

“Look, Y/N,” She sighed. “I...you...we both know under normal circumstances, we would never be friends,”

“...I mean, I guess…” You shrugged.

“Oh come on,” She gave you a look. “You’d have to explain every sentence you spoke to me,” She had crocodile tears rolling down her cheeks.

“Oh come on Ariel,” You sighed and sat next to her. “You’re NOT stupid,”

“I’m stupider than you!” She cried.

“...More stupid,” You corrected her.

“See?” She sniffled.

“Okay, but-- still,” You took her hand. "You're my best friend. Do you think that if I don't have to live with you anymore, I won't be your friend?"

"Maybe…" She looked at the floor.

"Ariel!" You cried. "Really? Come on,"

"You come on!" She was actually getting upset now. "Look, Y/N. I don't have...friends,"

"What?" You snorted. "You have the biggest social circle I know!"

"Yeah but--" she tried to find the right words. "They're not like….friends, friends ya know? They're more like…. followers, or leeches, of--"

"Sycophants," you chuckled. She did surround herself with as many people who would tell her she was amazing as possible.

"I don't know what that means but probably, yes," She nodded. “You’re the only one who I can actually talk to, you’re like my little sister,”

“....Right, so…? You think I’ll just give all that up if I move out? If I don’t need you financially anymore?”

“Maybe…” She mumbled. “But ALSO, if that stupid asshole gets into your head about me!”

“Oh God…” You put a hand over your head. “Ariel,” You took both of her hands and looked at her very seriously.

“You are my absolute best friend in this entire world, no…’boy’ could change that! I’ve known you so long, I know you completely. Nothing he could tell me would make me turn on you, I swear it,”

“Really?” She raised an eyebrow at you.

“Really! You held a hand up like an oath. “AND, even if-- WHEN, I get financially stable and can live on my own two feet, I will ALWAYS be your friend,” You used the oath hand and placed it in hers again. “I swear it,”

“....Okay, but absolutely ZERO sleepovers here,”

“Oh, my god, ARIEL,” You gasped. “I JUST want to talk to him about law stuff!”

“Yeah, that’s what he said too,” She rolled her eyes, not believing either of you.

“He did?” You felt your face fall.

“Ah HA! See? Disappointment!”

“Shut up,” You hit her. “I don’t care, we should just be professional anyway,”

“Uh huh,” She nodded sarcastically.

“Are you going to give me his number or not?” You gave her a look.

“No,”

“ARIEL,” You crossed your arms.

“No, then you’re going to immediately call him and give him ALL the power,” She wagged a finger at you. “I’m going to give him YOUR number, and if he calls you, he calls you,”

“Ariel…” You gave her another look.

“What? You don’t believe me?” She feigned offense.

“I really don’t,” You shook your head.

“Alright FINE,” She pulled out her phone and opened her texts with Rafael, typed in your number and hit SEND.

“Happy?” She showed you her phone.

“....Maybe,” You hid the giddiness that was building in your stomach.

Almost IMMEDIATELY after sending the text, your phone lit up wildly.

“Good god I’m gonna get out of here before the nerdy phone sex starts,” She ran out of the room with her mimosa in tow.

“Shut up!” You hissed, mentally preparing yourself for this phone call. The phone call you’d been waiting for for days, even when you thought he was a “player”. You took a deep breath and hit ANSWER:

“Hello?”

“Y/N?”

“Yeah who’s this?” You asked coyly.

“It’s...Rafael, Barba…”

“I’m sorry, who?” You teased.

“Ariel’s….brother?” He skipped the asterisk that went along with “Brother”.

“Ohhhh right right right,” You nodded, keeping him nervous. “Yeah, Ariel told me all about you,”

“I knew it,” He growled thinking about Ariel and her lies. “Whatever she said, she’s lying,”

“Oh so you don’t want to be my mentor?”

“Wha--?” He was shocked. Did Ariel actually change her mind? Or dare he think...a change of heart?

“Yes! I mean, I do! I absolutely do!” He may have said that a little too overzealous, so he dialed it back. “I mean, if I have some time I’d be up for it, if that’s okay with you,”

“I might, maybe…” You were twirling your hair in your fingers. “When do you think you might have time?”

“Well you know I was thinking--” He started, but there was a knock at the door.

“Oh sorry, one second,” You got up and walked over to the door and swung it open to reveal Rafael standing there, right in front of you. He was dressed in a black suit with a pink tie. As amazing as he looked in street clothes, you thought you might mount him right there in that suit.

“I have some time right now,” He smiled, acting as if he was still on the phone. You couldn’t help yourself, you leapt into his arms and kissed him, HARD.

-------

“Hello? Y/N?”

You snapped back to reality, Rafael was talking to you on the phone.

“Oh! Um, Yeah, sorry what?”

“I said I have some time right now, if you wanna meet for coffee or something,” He half laughed, still enchanted by your awkwardness.

“Yes! Sure! I...let me just get dressed, just text me the address, I’ll meet you in a few,” You were so glad he couldn’t see how beet red you were from that little fantasy you had just been in.

“Sounds good,” You could hear him smile; even through the phone it made you weak in the knees.

You hung up and ran to Ariel’s room, hoping she’d help you get dressed.

What could you wear to impress him?

#rafael barba #rafael barba x you #rafael barba x reader #law and order svu #law and order svu fanfiction #clueless #rafael barba imagine

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the-river-person · 3 years ago

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Epilogue

Wind swept through the red grass like a wave upon the sea, sending ripples down the slopes of the endless hills. In the lowest valleys the grass vanished into a soft white fog, making the hilltops seem as if they were detached from the earth and floating through an ocean of clouds. Sans gazed around in wonder, while also having to shield his eyes a little. Above them the sky was a thousand blending shades of purple, everything from a deep angry bruise to a very soft lilac. At the edge of the Horizon was the sun, and from here it looked a very deep red color, and though it wasn’t terribly bright, he still had to shield his eyes. It seemed that he needed some time for his eyes to properly adjust to seeing the surface in all of its overwhelming brightness after living in the muted and shadowed Underground for all his life. Well for lifetimes on end, really. Mouth open wide, and eye lights nearly pinpricks in shock, Gaster too appeared to be too stunned for words at the sight of this world. Sans knew that his uncle had been around to see the Surface of their own Universe, and judging by Gaster’s reaction, it was nothing at all like this. The River Person had taken them to this place because he said it was still a relatively safe Universe to visit for a little while. Comfortably seated in his ferry boat, the River Person didn’t seem inclined to go anywhere soon, so they’d opted to explore for a bit while staying in sight. Arriving at another Universe was just as bizarre as leaving one had been. It was as if there was a reflective orb in the distance, only when you got closer it wasn’t you that it was reflecting, but a place. And if you got close enough it was as if the reflection warped and twisted itself so that it swallowed you and you were sitting in another Universe as smoothly as if you’d landed your boat at the docks. Actually the ferryboat itself was sitting in the middle of the red grass, and looked perfectly natural there as if it were supposed to sail across the sea of red grass and plants instead of up and down a river. Out in the distance the world got even stranger. To the right, he wasn’t sure what the compass direction was because the red sun appeared to be circling the horizon instead of crossing overhead in an arc, he could see bright glow that spanned the whole edge of the sky in that direction, as if the area was filled with light. And to the left the sky seemed to get darker and darker until the horizon that way was shadowed and still. “Pretty, isn’t it?” “Yes,” he breathed, still trying to take it all in. The next moment he leaped away in shock as he realized the comment had come from someone who had unexpectedly been standing beside him. It was a skeleton, somewhat similar to himself in appearance but not quite. Wearing brown pants that might have been tucked in overalls by the green straps that were sticking out from one side of the waist, a white shirt, and a long brown scarf... the skeleton’s clothing alone made a strong first impression of him. But more interesting than that were the splotch of black ink that coated the bottom right side of his jaw and the enormous paint brush that he carried on his back like a sheathed sword. Over his chest was a belt holding a series of tiny phials with heart shaped stoppers, each phial held a different colored liquid within, and altogether and in order they formed a kind of rainbow pattern. Finally, around his neck and hanging down his back was an incredibly long scarf of some brown fabric. The Skeleton was grinning at him, mischief dancing in his eye sockets, which Sans had only just realized contained some odd shapes. In his left eye, the pupil was shaped like a bright, five pointed, golden star (☆), twinkling merrily as if to say “I’m excited!” to all the world. And in his right eye the pupil took the shape of... and this left Sans feeling more bewildered than anything else, a small purple 7. But even as he watched the pupils changed shape, and again, and again. A spiral (๑), a triangle border with nothing inside (△), a check mark (✓), an eroteme (?), a small crescent moon (☽), a pair of squiggly lines that might have been either water or a double tilde (≈), a silcrow (§), a percontation point (⸮), and a very small umbrella (☂). “Hullo!” said the skeleton. “I’m Ink! Guardian of the Multiverse and Protector of AUs!” Gaster, who had turned around to see what Sans had been reacting to, was examining the newcomer with something akin to professional curiosity. “AUs?” he asked, tilting his skull slightly to the side. “Alternate Universes,” clarified Ink. “And parallel ones. And pretty much any other kind of universe that springs up. So... now that I’ve introduced myself, who are you two?” Other universes, the thought was a little frightening. Sure he’d heard Gaster practically wax poetic on the subject numerous times, and here he was standing in another universe entirely. But it was different hearing someone else talk about them existing, as if they’d seen them with their own eyes. An entire multiverse full of them. And if Ink was truly the Guardian of that Multiverse and every universe inside of it, then he must be a really important person. “I’m Sans-” he started to say, not sure whether there was special protocol for introducing yourself to a Multiverse Guardian, but Ink was already cutting him off, flapping his hand impatiently at them. “No no no. There are way too many Sanses and Gasters floating about. Even I’m a Sans. We like to use... well I guess you’d call them nicknames. They help keep us from getting confused. More confused. Some people use the name of their AU, others ” Somewhat at a loss, Sans turned to look at Gaster, who only shrugged unhelpfully. Well alright then. A nickname huh? His thoughts raced back years and years, decades, centuries, all the way to that very first therapy session with Doctor Whimsol. She’d suggested that he didn’t have to be a Sans if he didn’t feel like one. For a while he’d toyed with various other names, mostly Fonts in the style of Skeleton naming conventions. But he’d never really made anything of it. Perhaps one of the ones he’d liked would do? Something that suited him the way that he was now. He’d changed a great deal since then. There was no way anyone would think of him in formal terms, even now. But he was a bit more serious, even though he tried to stay approachable. He wasn’t suffering from depression and guilt, and he was a lot more active than he had been. So something light-hearted but serious, informal like, with a sense of movement.... It came to him and he grinned suddenly. “Mistral,” he informed the Guardian of the Multiverse. “I’m Mistral.“ Looking intrigued, Ink nodded enthusiastically. “It suits you! A little rough of a font, sort of like brush writing, but with this... um... crystal stuff on your bones, it really works.” Oh yeah, Sans had forgotten about the Kenón still growing on him. It had sped up its growth a bit in the Void, which made sense because they were already connected. Small spikes of silvery-grey crystal were now easily seen growing up from the collar of his shirt and from his sleeves, and tiny lumps were beginning to form under his usual overcoat that betrayed the crystals growing underneath. “I think,” said Gaster suddenly, “That I would like to be known as Majuscule.” Sans stared at him. “You want to be named after Capitalized Letters?” he asked incredulously. It wasn’t a font. Though they weren’t really required to stick to those if they truly didn’t want to. But it was related enough that it was odd that Gaster would want to choose that of all things for a name. The smile the scientist gave him was a smug one. “When I use the Wingdings Sign variant it really doesn’t differentiate between Minuscule and Maguscule symbols like the font does in physical writing. And since I cannot speak it out loud and adjust the volume of my speech, it is as if I am saying everything in capitalized letters, constantly speaking with maximum intensity all the time.” Oh Angel, of course Gaster would choose something that convoluted. Sans groaned and rolled his eyes, surprisingly Ink only looked amused and actually giggled, his eyes flitting between an octothorp followed immediately by an S (#S) , an ecphoneme (!), an on/off symbol, and an asterisk (*). “I’m guessing you guys are new travelers to the Multiverse. That means you’re the ones I was looking for. You see, I felt a Universe die recently, and I went to go protect it from whatever was causing it to be destroyed. But it was dying on its own, of old age. I’ve never seen a Universe do that before, reach its natural ending. Then I found a trail in the Void, the sort of paths the River Folk make when they travel, and I knew that someone must have escaped before everything fell apart. And well... here you are!” Ink smirked and stuck out his tongue in a sort of “blep” way. Somewhere in the back of his head, Sans couldn’t help but notice that the tongue was rainbow hued. But now that he was reminded, he had more important questions. “Did you see anyone else?” He asked. “A ship in the Void? Any survivors? Papyrus? Well, my Papyrus anyway. He’s the Captain of the Royal Guard. And there were a lot of people on the ship before it fell into the Void. Please, if you’ve seen anything...” He trailed off hopefully. Ink’s eyes had suddenly become two ecphonemes (!). “Wait, there are more than just you two?” asked the Guardian excitedly. “It’s pretty rare we get more than a Sans or a Gaster. For some reason the Sanses seem to be inclined to go traveling more than others, though we do get Papyruses and Gasters here and there. But I don’t recall seeing a ship...hmmm.” Then Ink reached back and pulled on his scarf. Upon closer inspection, Sans could see all kinds of writing on it, scribbles and notes. Ink was using the thing as a planner. For a moment Ink squinted down at the scarf, searching through all the notes. They could see his mouth moving as he silently muttered some of the reminders he was reading. At last he looked up. “Nope, sorry. I haven’t seen any ship. But I’ll make a note to keep an eye out for one. I definitely don’t want to miss seeing that. Oh, but I did write down something else. I found this where your universe used to be.” And digging into his pocket, Ink produced something that was difficult to see. It was like a point, but without any width, depth, surface, or length. It flickered strangely and Sans heard Gaster’s intake of breath behind him. “There it is!” said the Scientist as he stepped forward, reaching for the thing. “The last fragment. The final percentage. What bit of me are you hiding in such a small form?” His hand closed around it and he closed his eyes, looking triumphant and relieved. Just as quickly he snapped them back open again in alarm. “Sans!” “What?” “I had three assistants, Sans. Three! Not four! I don’t know who Goner actually is!” * * * The Tem had managed to push the wreckage away from itself, freeing its trapped hind leg. Nobody else was in this part of the Ship, mostly being occupied in repair work or attempts to plan and reorganize. He’d volunteered to come out here and replace the spark plugs in this area because it would make it easier to get away from people for a while. A low creak, like metal under strain, made him turn. It was similar to the sound he’d heard earlier before the ceiling fell. This ship had taken a lot of damage in the crash, it was no wonder it was all falling apart at the seams. There was no one there. Yeah, probably just more infrastructure damage from the crash that needed to be repaired. Turning back brought him face to face with the grey torso of Goner, who was looming over him with his pale whitish-grey eyes. “Your name is Bob, right?” Said Goner in an expressionless tone. It wasn’t really a question exactly. More like a statement with a question tacked onto the end like an afterthought. Suddenly Goner’s expression seemed almost sly, sinister. Perhaps it was just the lighting, but the Tem shrank from the Monster as he leaned forward. “My name is Goner, I have a feeling we’re going to be very good friends.” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ink!Sans belongs to @comyet Special Thanks to @msaoa12345 for their continued reblogging, praise, and excitable and positive commentary. Without their support, this story wouldn’t be anywhere near finished.

#gaster #w d gaster #wingings #wing ding gaster #sans undertale #sans the skeleton #the river person #goner kid #bob the tem #ink sans #ink!sans #aeontale #undertale au #undertale fanfiction #undertale multiverse #the void undertale #unicode symbols #temmies #epilogue

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sideblog-666-thousand · 4 years ago

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Samoth and Tyr (ex-Borknagar) Interview, 1999. Ft. Samoth being a massive cunt. Part Two.

Here’s the sequel to «Samoth and Tyr (ex-Borknagar) Interview, 1999. Ft. Samoth being a massive cunt. Part One».

I like to start these usually with some background information on the source, but any background information I could possibly offer was already inserted into the first part, you know? It doesn’t feel right to just copy-paste, or transcribe, something of someone else’s and post it online, even though I do it for free, and mostly for myself*. I still want to do something kind of creative with it. The proposed drinking game was probably about as creative as I could get with this though...

Okay, so! I actually saw Emperor live. I got to see them front row, in fact. It was a really good show— I’d love to see them play again.

Any possible commentary is in (parenthesis) and bold. Asterisks below and optional.

Without further ado:

I: Can you tell us anything concerning Thou Shalt Suffer? [Death metal band Thou Shalt Suffer can be seen as the predecessor to Emperor, having both Samoth (Samot) and Ishahn (Ygg) in its line-up. After the band split up, Ihsahn kept the name for his clasically inspired synthesizer project]

S: Yeah, well Ihsahn is still working on it and I mean it seems like an endless project. I don't know when he's actually going to finish it. He's been saying every year, like: "This year I'm going to finish it.", but it's still not finished. I have already heard a little bit, but he's always like, skipping material and making new songs, I really don't.... I'm just gonna check out the album when it's coming out, if ever*...

I: What about the former members, like Ildjarn? Is he still working on his own project, Ildjarn?

S: Well Ildjarn is... I see him now and then. He has a new band - it's a keyboard kind of thing - more atmospheric music, but I don't see him that much. He's a pretty weird guy. And our old drummer [Thorbjørn - ed] is actually our sound engineer for our latest album.

I: For a while you were in many different bands, for a short while - will you do that sort of thing again? Did you leave Emperor to join Burzum in '92?

S: I don't have the time anymore. At that point we had no drummer with Emperor and everything went really slow. So I just had to play something and I joined Satyricon and I played with Gorgoroth and stuff like that. It was just because things was going really slow with my main band. I've never left Emperor. All I did with Burzum was being in the studio for a few hours to do the bass and do drums.

I: About Arcturus - what do you think about their musical development? [Samoth used to play guitars in Arcturus a well. He recorded the legendary "Constellation" demo with this band, which was originally issued in 500 copies on MCD through NAP - later there was also issued a vinyl edition with three bonus tracks, namely the "My Angel" 7-inch and a re-recorded version of "Morax" - Samoth does not appear on these bonus-tracks]

S: I think it's excellent, especially... they made a remix album now a well of the previous album. there's a lot of weird beats and drum and bass samples on it. It's coming out in April, on Garm's label Jester, the same as Ulver.

I: I had heard that they had split up - is that correct?

S: Yeah, I think so, but I think they have been discussing about doing a new album, I mean, I don't know.. these guys are a bit slow...

I: In the "Reverence" video there is a line, "Honour commanded no longer as virtue*", it's part of the lyrics, but it's shown in words on the screen. Why? It seems like an unobvious statement for Emperor. You used to state that honour was really important.

S: It is important to have honour in what you do and it's important to honour and respect the people you ...respect.

I: Then it would be a virtue, wouldn't it?

S: Well... what was the line again? But it is Ihsahn's lyrics, so it would be better for him to explain it in a bigger complex, but I think it has to do with people not putting pride and honour in what they do anymore. People just don't care about nothing.

I: OK...In some earlier interviews you've shown a strong anti-christian attitude...

S: I still have an anti-christian attitude, but it's not something I think that much about these days, anymore. I don't really bother that much about Christians, they're not a big problem for me in my personal life. But to me it's just as normal as eating breakfast to be anti-christian, so I am*.

I: There have been times that you had more radical views, for example what did you want to achieve with the church burnings?

S: Well, I didn't want to achieve anything really. It was just like an extreme statement, I would think. I didn't think it would make any difference in society. It was a destructive act, both for me and everybody else in a way. Probably more for myself...

I: How did the jail sentence influence you as a person and as a musician?

S: Well, I had a lot of time to be for myself for once... But I think of the whole thing as a good experience. I think actually for a lot of people it could do good to be in prison for a while. It kind of puts your life into the good perspective and it's kind of interesting to see life from a different perspective. To be in prison it was totally meaningless - that's the whole point of being in prison: to take away the joy of life and lock you in for a time.

T: You made the instrumental (below) in prison.

S: Yeah, "The Wanderer" from "Anthems...", that was made in prison. And that's completely different from what I usually write.

I: You had a guitar in prison?

S: Yeah, sure.

I: I thought they weren't allowed, because you could hang yourself...

S: No, it was not that extreme...

I: So we might expect more Dissection material as well - as Jon Nödveidt is allowed to have a guitar in prison. What do you think about this whole case?

S: I think it was really stupid actually, because Dissection really had something going. They even had the studio booked and the material finished... and he just had to do this...

I: Do you feel any remorse about the churches and stuff?

S: No.

I: Do you feel any remorse at all about things you do in life?

S: I mean, I do have feelings of course, but I don't see any point to regret the things I did. I'd rather see it as an experience and learn from an experience rather than "Oh, why did I do that - if I would have done differently..." there's no point. (In other words: no.)

I: It's not some code of honour not to feel remorse?

S: No. It's just a waste of time to feel remorse. I see no point in it to regret the things I've done. I mean you just bring yourself down by feeling too much remorse. What happens, happens - you can't change the past, so.

I: In an interview you made this statement that "you have to be a ruler and think for yourself" and in an interview with your wife Nebelhexe*, she made this statement that the Count had had this big influence on you and that he had got you involved in the church burnings - how do these statements match?

S: Back in '91 and '92 all the people in the so called Black Metal Circle or whatever, were pretty young, so we all were pretty easily influenced. And Vikernes was also very influenced by Euronymous, in the first place. So I think a lot of the stuff that happened back then.. it was like: everybody had extreme ideas and everybody just wanted to be more and more extreme and we all got influenced by each other. And of course Vikernes, he has a very strong personality and he was the one who started with all the extremes, like actually going out and doing it in practice, so I guess he was influential to a lot of peolpe.

I: Was it an important reason to join Burzum - because you were looking up to him?

S: Well I mean, I respected Burzum and I saw this like an honour to join something I respected, but it was not: Wow, I'm playing with Varg Vikernes or something.

I: Are you still in touch with Mortiis? His departure from Emperor wasn't completely 'as friends'...

S: Yeah, he's been living in Sweden for many years, actually. I don't see him often, but his parents are just living a few blocks away. We phone now and then, and the whole is coming along just fine. Concerning his departure, he had a bit of an attitude back the, I guess. And he and Faust also didn't get along that well so it was best thet he would leave and for a while it was maybe a bit touchy, but now it's completely good.

I: What about your future plans?

S: Well the most immediate future plans is to finish this tour and we have a gig in Norway in May and hopefully we're going to do some more Scandinavian shows in Sweden and Finland...We have an offer for the Dynamo-festival in Holland as well, but I mean so far... I would like to - I wanna play a lot more live, but I mean, not everybody in the band is too keen on playing live, so we have to make comprimises. So we are probably going to do an American tour in the summer for three weeks with Dimmu Borgir - that should be a good experience I think. We' re starting to do pretty well in America as well now.

I: Comparing your first gig in Holland in 'de Baroeg' in Rotterdam and the one tonight, I think you have really improved a lot. What do you think yourself?

S: Well that's good to hear. We can still improve a lot I think. I mean when I watch these guys of Morbid Angel, I go: 'Wow, these guys are really good.' I just hope we get the opportunity to play more live and I don't know, improve our live act.

I: Goals for the future?

S: That's difficult. With Emperor we usually make the material for one album and we don't think too much ahead. The latest album has been doing well like all albums and better than expected. In the beginning I guess and we try to support the album by playing live and get more professional. So for the new album we have no new material, really nothing... and Ihsahn is also pretty busy with Peccatum and Thou Shalt Suffer. Peccatum will start working on their 2nd album when the tour is finished.

I: What do you think of Peccatum?

S: I think it's a good album, but I mean it's not an album I wanna play myself on. I think it could have been a lot better with a much stronger production. The production is weak.

T: I think it's... the drum copmuter, I prefer the live drummer feel.

S: Limbonic Art is a band in which I like the use of a drum computer. They do it in a special way. They don't pretend, like... they don't to try to get it to sound like a real drums, they just use the opportunities they have with a drum machine.

T: ...[about Peccatum again] but I still like their live performances. The theatrical style...

S: Yeah, I think Peccatum is actually better live than on CD*.

T: Better singing... more powerful.

I: They have this session guitarist. Didn't Ihsahn consider you to play the guitar for Peccatum?

S: No.

I: You wouldn't want to do it?

S: Well, I'm not sure if I could do it. I mean some of the stuff is pretty like... technical. I am not adepted to all this technical stuff. I think Peccatum is more technical than Emperor actually.

I: There have been a number of books coming out lately about the years 92-93, like for example "The Lords of Chaos" - is there basically any truth in these books?

S: Well I mean, "The Lords of Chaos" there is some truth in it of course, but I think that book emphasizes a lot on right-wing side of the whole thing - there is a lot of Varg Vikernes in there and also the author [Michael Monian], he is very interested in the political thing. I think he made the black metal thing look much more political then it ever was. Yeah, I can understand that to the outside world, it nearly sounds like mythology, of course - for a young teenager who gets this book it's like: "Wow, this is amazing..", but to me it's like no big deal. I don't think that much about it. People expect me to wake up in the morning and think about this stuff all the time, but I mean it happened many, many years ago...

I: But you wouldn't want the whole scene to turn back again to like it was back then?

S: No, I mean the whole scene has changed and I think people think more individually these days and just do what they feel like and are more honest about themselves and I think that's a good progression. I think it's a bit stupid to think that, "now we are grown up and are descent guys" - that'd seem silly in a way, but I mean back then we were very young and it was kind of obvious that we would have to change. You don't stay eighteen forever. But I am totally respectful to Darkthrone who still represent the essence of true Norwegian black metal, I guess.

I: What is Darkthrone doing these days then? Isn't Fenriz to busy with his other activities - I heard his deejay-ing in some club?

S: I think they actually are getting back together and doing an album this spring. They even have booked a studio and anything. It's true, he's deejay-ing, but he's changing all the time so all of a sudden is like: "OK, we're doing a Darkthrone album now and that's what I do."

I: What is it with all the cover albums you're participating on? Is it just good fun?

S: Well, we get so many offers. So we say like: OK. We have plenty more offers as well, so we just thought like.. when we were in the studio for the new album we recorded a Mayhem one, we did the Thorns vs Emperor, we did a Darkthrone one, so when we are in the studio it's no big deal to just do a cover as well.

I: I also heard you tried out the new studio by recording over tracks. Was the Hellhammer track the first to be recorded there?

S: Yeah it was kind of like that in a way to check out the studio and make sure it was good enough. No, the Hellhammer song wasn't recorded there. It was recorded in our old rehearsing room, just on a four track recorder. We just did that on an evening, we didn't even have a drummer at the time - we just had a guy from Gehenna [Dirge Rep, ed], coming down for a weekend and we said, OK let's do a cover, now and we just did it and they put it out.

I: What do you think of the fact that bands from Italy and France are using Norwegian lyrics?

S: Well. I think it's pretty comical.

I: Do they make sense?

S: Well most of the time they don't make sense. A lot of these countries have quite interesting mythology themselves, so why not use those?

I: Any small bands you could recommend us?

S: There is one called the Myrkskog - they've just signed to Candlelight now actually and they are a pretty good band. [Their guitarist was playing live as a session member with Peccatum, ed]

I: Is there anything you would like to add before closing off?

S: Not really... these carrots are good, that's my final comment! (God, this is so cute but I don’t know why)

T: Not really, no - Just that I love to be on tour and stuff like that... Before I joined with Emperor I had just played out for five times, or something...

That’s all! :)

*I do it because I’ve noticed how many great interviews I’ve lost over the years, due to websites being taken down, or something. Whilst some interviews have been re-shared over numerous platforms and accounts, I like to have my own copy because I know nothing will happen to it. The reason I share it is because I might as well, since I have nothing better to do.

*The mythical ‘Thou Shalt Suffer’ album was released— a year later, in fact. Ihsahn had been talking about it in interviews all the way back in ‘96 too. It’s called ‘Somnium’. It’s not my thing, to be honest. However, I think it’s nice that Samoth let Ihsahn keep the name. ‘Into The Woods of Belial’ was cool though.

*This is such a ridiculous question. It’s very obvious what Ihsahn meant and I feel as though Samoth must’ve been distracted if he was unable to answer it. It’s the latter half of the lyrics that stands to be questioned. 3:17 for lyric, though you’ve likely heard it before: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=4FYwz2-_G_4

*I have this strange mental image of Samoth just casually eating cereal with milk that he dyed red with food colouring......

*Funny enough, they divorced a little after this interview too— around the next two years or so, I don’t know exactly when. Samoth later goes on to marry his girlfriend, who was a photographer whilst he was touring with Zyklon back in 2001. In an interview (which no longer exists, unfortunately) Nebelhexe goes on to make a few comments that make it sound like a certain somebody may have had his fingers in a few too many pots....

*The thing about some bands sounding better live than on CD is really true! I once saw this band, ‘Havok’, live (I was at a metal music festival) and I thought they were incredible, but when I listened to their studio releases, I thought it was very weak and boring.

Legal disclaimer: I am not, in anyway shape or form, claiming that Samoth literally cheated on his wife. What I am, however, saying, is that it’s very sus from my very narrow field of vision. This is just a bit of comedy. However, if you are Samoth, or a representative of Samoth, feel to sue me regardless. Please, daddy, it’s all I’ve ever wanted since I was fifteen. I’ll do anything, daddy, ruin my fucking life— take a chainsaw and literally RIP MY FUCKING GUTS— okay, I’ll stop now before anybody thinks I’m being serious.

#black metal #emperor #interview #true norwegian black metal #emperor band #samoth emperor #samoth

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hopelessromanticspoonie · 5 years ago

Text

Right or Wrong

Well, this one is for @grahoundart, who got my brain going on the idea of Loki rescuing a damsel in distress from the gif below (imagine him saying “She’s mine”. This is what came of it. It does lean into the damsel in distress trope a bit, so if that’s not your cup of tea, you might not want to read.

Warnings: Implied smut, alcohol consumption, and the beginnings of non-consenting touching from a man to a woman. I will put the threats of such acts in between asterisks so you can skip over that part, if you wish.

“Just one drink! And if you don’t drink, just come and hang out. Everyone will be there,” Nat coaxed you good-naturedly with a winning smile and elbow nudged into your ribs. “Plus, I hear Thor is dragging Loki along.”

You rolled your eyes, gathering your notes and carefully organizing them into your satchel to take home for the evening. “Nobody can drag Loki along to anything.”

She shrugged. “True, but I hear he’s coming. I’ve noticed how you look at him during meetings.”

You didn’t realize you had been that obvious. It was completely inappropriate for you to have anything more than a professional interest in the tall, dark, and intimidating god given your position in public relations for the Avengers. But you couldn’t help but be drawn to the devilishly handsome man with his arresting emerald eyes that seemed to stare straight into your very soul. You longed to work the tension from his shoulders with a gentle caress, discover if his jaw was truly as sharp as it appeared or if his lips could twist and give into anything besides a disdainful frown or sarcastic smirk.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you bluffed, dropping your eyes to your hands fidgeting with a collection of sticky notes.

She patted you on the shoulder. “Sure you don’t. We’re all meeting up around ten, unless the world ends before then. See you there.”

You grumbled incoherently at her retreating back, putting a bit more force into your packing up even as your heart raced at the possibilities the evening hinted at.

What would one drink hurt?

“I’m only here to make sure that you don’t get yourselves into trouble!” you insisted loudly over the loud music streaming from the jukebox beside you, taking a sip of the drink she’d shoved into your hand as soon as you’d appeared. “Not to socialize.”

“Whatever you say,” Nat agreed, leaning back against the bar you sat at, eyeing the crowd at your back. “So you don’t care at all that Loki and Thor just walked in? And that they’re walking toward us right now looking like sex on two legs?”

You choked, coughing against the burn of the alcohol seizing your lungs, leaning against the worn wooden bar for support.

A hand, warm and large, patted and rubbed at your back in turn, accompanied by a silken voice you’d recognize anywhere murmuring in your ear. “Easy, sweetling. It isn’t yet late enough for me to steal your breath away.”

Heat flushed beneath the skin of your cheeks and neck at the salacious timbre of his richly accented voice. You turned just enough to look him in the eye. He was so close that any movement from either of you would touch your lips together. Were they soft and pillowy? Did they taste like toothpaste or the alcohol that lightly scented his breath as it teased against your neck?

The logical side of your brain took control over the carnal needs sending your thoughts into a flurry. It wasn’t proper to even begin to think that way. He was your client, and you couldn’t mix business with pleasure. And judging by the desire that darkened his gaze as his eyes darted to your painted lips and his hand traveled lower to smooth over the small of your back, he could give you pleasure.

You cleared your throat, straightening up and taking a gulp of your drink to give yourself something - anything - to focus on besides Loki at your side. His hand left your back so he could take his own drink, and he stood in the spot Nat just vacated without so much as a second glance in your direction. He chose to stare out over the crowd instead, his eyes lighting on the rest of the crew clustered around a series of pushed together tables before scanning the other patrons with nothing but boredom settling on his finely-sculped features.

“Milady! How are you this fine evening?” Thor’s pleasant voice practically boomed out over everything else as he stood beside his brother, holding a frosted mug of beer so large that it was almost comical.

You fell into easy conversation with the golden god, interrupted on occasion by a random Avenger strolling up and giving an enthusiastic greeting on their way to grab another round for everyone else. Loki’s eyes lingered on you from time to time, dragging down your body and lighting an inferno in their wake that you longed for him to smother with his lips and calloused fingertips. Somehow you managed to keep your cool, channeling all of your desire and tension into the white knuckles that clutched your drink as if it could stop your heart from jumping out of your chest and into his waiting hands.

At one point the nervous drinks you had consumed finally got to you, and you excused yourself to the ladies’ room. No amount of splashing cool water on your face was going to calm your frazzled nerves, even if it did feel amazing. You adjusted your shirt as you walked out, bumping into a wall of a man in your brief moment of distraction.

“I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean-”

Loki turned around, catching you as you stumbled with his hands on the dip in your waist, cutting off your quickly rambled apology. Once you were righted his touch lingered, branding you through the thin cotton of your t-shirt. “Apology accepted, although unnecessary. You must be more observant in the future.”

You combed your fingers through your hair to give your hands something to do besides splaying across his chest to see if the muscles barely visible beneath his button-down shirt were truly as smooth as they appeared. “Oh, uh, yeah. I’ll do that. Thanks.”

He released you from his captivating presence, freeing you to dart through the crowd back to Thor who watched over your newly acquired glass of water dutifully.

“Ah, you’re back!” he exclaimed, shooting you a radiant smile that could probably outdo the sun for how much warmth it exuded. “You look unwell. Is everything alright?”

Only after chugging half of your water did you reply, setting the glass down gently on the bar to compensate for how your hands trembled with an intoxicating combination of excitement and nerves. “Yeah. Just ran into Loki, literally, and almost fell on my ass.”

“You are attracted to him.”

You shook your head a little too forcefully to be believable. “Of course not. He’s my client, as are you and the rest of the Avengers.”

“He is attracted to you as well,” he replied, as if you hadn’t spoken at all. His eyes moved through the crowd before settling on a distant point, and you knew it had to be the man currently in question. “I approve of such a union.”

Union? “No, no, no. It isn’t like that. He’s just-” Your phone buzzed insistently in your pocket, drawing your attention. Glaring at the familiar name of your boss lighting up your screen, you waved it at Thor apologetically before shouldering your way through the crowd and out of the door into the night.

“Hello?” You shoved the phone into your ear, scurrying away from the front door to escape the biting cold wind that tore through your clothing. You’d left your coat inside. The alleyway beside the bar provided a bit of shelter from the wind, although it now seemed the journey was pointless was the call had been dropped.

“What is so important at midnight that you have to call?” you hissed, stomping your feet against the cold sinking into your bones as you redialed the number, your chin tucked into your chest and your shoulders hunched.

“Whatcha doin’ there, sweet cheeks?”

Your hand fell to your side, thumb hovering over the keyboard as dread filled your veins with a thick sludge that threatened to anchor you to the spot. Lifting your gaze from the dirty asphalt, you caught sight of the man walking confidently toward you, all sinister swagger as he stopped too close for your liking.

“Just calling my boyfriend,” you hedged, backing up until the grit of the stone wall bit into your shoulder blades. You searched behind him frantically for someone, anyone, to see your wide eyes and trembling figure slinking into the shadows. But they were all going about their business without even glancing in your direction, too busy to notice the quiet confrontation happening scant feet to their right.

“Why don’t I keep you company until he shows up?” he asked, an ominous chill to his tone as his hands came up on either side of your shoulders to box you in.

You closed your fist over your phone, trying to remember anything from the self-defense classes Tony had gotten for all the staff, when the weight of his body was suddenly lifted from yours. It was replaced by the gentle pressure of another, and your vision was filled with Loki’s broad shoulders.

His hand reached out behind him, and you slipped your fingers through his without a second thought, the reassuring touch pulling you into him until your front fitted to his back. He settled your hand on his side in slow, measured movements that told nothing of the strength and rage straining at the muscles in his neck and clenching in his jaw. His body practically thrummed against you from withheld fury.

The tension beneath your fingertips matched the threat lacing his words. “She’s mine.”

The man scrambled up from where he’d sprawled on the ground, brushing off his jeans and shooting Loki a hateful glare. “I don’t see your name anywhere.”

You shifted just enough so that you could catch Loki’s profile, the line of his jaw and slope of his nose drawing your attention to his eyes, which briefly flashed a blood red that shot a spike of terror through you. They held a dangerous promise that you didn’t want to see fulfilled.

“She is mine,” he repeated, arms moving out from his sides in a fluid motion. The glint of his daggers caught the light at the edges of your vision. “Leave now if you wish to maintain what little manhood you possess for believing you can accost anyone in such a fashion, let alone what belongs to me.”

The man wisely took the command, cursing under his breath as he stormed away. The breath you hadn’t known you’d been holding burst out of you, and you sank back against the bar’s outer wall, closing your eyes as you focused on calming your racing heart.

“Did he harm you?” The words were soft, quiet and dripping with concern, directed at you from just in front of you.

You opened up your eyes, tilting your head back so that you could clearly see Loki towering protectively over you. His brows pulled together with his care for you, and he stepped to shield your body from the view of those passing by as well as from the frigid wind. When you trembled, either from shock or cold you weren’t sure, he removed his black blazer and draped it over your shoulders. His hands rubbed warmth and comfort over your upper arms.

“No,” you managed to eke out around the dryness in your throat. Swallowing down your fear, you tried again, “I’m okay. It was just some dumbass…”

The skin around his eyes tightened as he peered down at you. “Would you like to gather your composure before returning to your companions?”

You couldn’t imagine the uproar that your current state would cause. Trembling, eyes wide and shoulders hunched, you were quite the opposite from the cool, calm, and collected persona you carefully constructed each day. Gratefully, you nodded, digging your fingers into the borrowed blazer and pulling it tighter around your shoulders. It was warm, scented with a clean, masculine scent that stirred longing deep in your belly.

“Come here,” Loki instructed quietly, holding out his arms at your sides. At your quirked brow, he clarified, “You look positively frozen and I am quite warm.”

When were you going to get such an offer again? Silencing the part of your brain that screamed that you shouldn’t do it, you stepped into his embrace, tucking your forehead into his neck and nuzzling your cheek against his chest. His arms held you firmly to him, cradling the back of your head and dipping beneath his blazer to rest on your waist. His thumb toyed with the sliver of skin he found between your shirt and jeans. Tendrils of pleasure slid out from that tiny tease of a touch, curling your toes and drawing all of the moisture from your mouth to pool hopefully between your legs.

“Thanks,” you whispered, your breath curling between you in a small cloud as you pulled your head back to look up at him. He dropped his chin to do the same. “I’m lucky you happened to be out here. Right place, right time and all that.”

His hand dropped to cup the side of your neck so his thumb could caress the soft skin beneath your ear. “It was no coincidence. I followed you here. I wanted to speak with you, alone.”

Your heart stopped beating. “About?”

His head lowered until his nose nudged along yours, and you felt the tiny puffs of air from his speech against your slightly parted lips. “I believe you know the matter I wished to discuss.”

He straightened up with a frown. It was quickly replaced by his typical look of indifference. You hated that look when compared to the desire that had graced his face only moments before. “But now is no longer an appropriate time. As you do not seem fit to enjoy the remainder of the evening, allow me to escort you home? It would soothe my anxieties to know that you arrived there safely.”

“Of-of course,” you stammered, shocked both by what he basically just admitted and at how quickly he had retreated from it. He pulled away from you fully, leaving emptiness behind that was more chilling than the softly falling snow that dotted his long, black locks. The ensuing ache in your chest was too much to bear. “Loki?”

He stilled, turning around on his heel. “Yes?”

Summoning all of your courage you reached out to him, stilling your fidgeting hands on the expanse of his chest. “You were right.”

“About what, sweetling?” he asked, guarded, curious, but not overly so as he regarded you behind dark lashes.

You threw all caution to the wind. “That I’m yours.”

“Is that so?” A hopeful grin curled on his lips. He walked you back into the safety of the shadows, the length of him holding you against the wall. It made your heart race in anticipation, and you wetted your lips in a quick flick of your tongue that made him growl softly in his throat. “Then I shall have what is mine.”

Your lips caught his in a tender, questioning kiss that differed from the fire you had seen burning in his eyes before yours had fallen closed. He was gentle, achingly so, as if you would break at the slightest bit of pressure or passion from him. But that touch broke the last of your barriers against him, sending them crumbling to the ground where your toes curled inside your shoes. Your fingers pressed into his pecs and you gasped into his mouth at the pure bliss that flowed through you, hot and enticing and demanding.

Your quiet gasp was his undoing, and he licked at your lips before slanting his mouth over yours in a deep and thorough kiss that took every bit of your yearning for him and created more. It was dark and rich and full to the brim with undisguised urgency. His fingers at your waist aided in the grind of your hips together and you clung onto him for fear of your knees weakening at his fervent touch.

You panted for air when he finally broke the kiss to lean his forehead against yours. You would have drowned in his amorous hold had he allowed it. “Loki?”

He hummed his questioning response, the words buzzing through your skin to tease at the tension clenching your stomach tight.

“Take me home.”

~~~

Little Bit o’ Loki taglist: @myownviperroom @grahoundart @darealbellabelleoftheball @boubouinscarlet @iamverity @rt8815 @lots-of-loki

Whole Shebang taglist: @just-the-hiddles @yespolkadotkitty @nonsensicalobsessions @vodka-and-some-sass @he-is-chaotic-she-is-psychotic @myoxisbroken @blah666 @brokenthelovely @myworddump @polireader @wiczer @littleredstarfish @the-broken-angel-13 @arch-venus25 @xxloki81xx @jessiejunebug @tinchentitri @sllooney @devilbat @vikkleinpaul @bouquet-o-undercaffeinated-roses @angelus80 @wolfsmom1 @kthemarsian @toozmanykids @claritastantrum @princerowanwhitethorngalathynius @sabine-leo @lovesmesomehiddles @peterman-spideyparker @silverswordthekilljoy

#loki fanfiction #loki #loki x reader #loki/reader #protective!loki #damsel in distress #implied smut #loki implied smut #marvel fanfiction #hopelesswrites #right or wrong

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thecurlsofgod · 5 years ago

Text

Bathroom Break || (5th Member)

Fandom: 5SOS

Pairing: None

Word Count: 642

Warnings: Swearing; Mentions of sex (not really); Blood mention (but not in a violent way); Very bad writing

I realized that the album can't be called CALM because there is a 5th member, but I don't care. Just go with it.

This whole first part before the asterisks (***) is just copied from the beginning of the stream, I had a way I was gonna do it, the said "Fuck it" and decided to get to the point. Oh, yeah, the writing sucks, I know. I don’t post my writing for a reason. !!!IT’S ALSO VERY SHORT!!!

It’s also my first thing I’ve posted on here, so some constructive criticism would be nice. I don’t take a lot of things to heart, so PLEASE tell me what I should work on.

***

"Oh, also I think I have a tooth infection, so my left side of my face is swollen," Calum says, rubbing the left side of his cheek.

You and the boys were doing a twitch stream to help the promo of CALM. You couldn't go to a radio station or interview because of quarantine, so you guys decided that this would have to do.

"Can we do some 'Tom Hanks, Castaway' style dentist work? Like a rock and a piece of fucking bamboo-"

"I would love to come over there and, umm, help you out with that- with your tooth problem." You watch Calum's face as Michael interrupts Ashton, eyes widening at the accidental innuendo.

"What, Cal? What- what's your problem?" Michael asks, not knowing why you, Ashton, and Calum are laughing.

"You saying you want Calum to give you a-"

"AND WE'RE ON!" You yell, trying to save the little ears that might be there from hearing Ashton.

"Oh! That was close."

***

"... and that is why Keanu Reeves was my first celebrity crush, is still my celebrity crush, and always will be my celebrity crush." You said leaning back in your chair.

"That's cool, but my celebrity crush is Jessica Alba from 2007..." Your sudden need to pee blacks out the rest of Michael's story.

"Guys, I need to pee." You say, staring at the screen. "Can I please go pee?" You ask.

"Depends, can you make it quick?" Ashton asks. "I did mine in like... 28 seconds. I don't think you can beat that."

"I'm not fucking trying to beat you, I'm trying to pee. I don't really care at this point, I'm just gonna go." You go to take off your headset so you can get up, and see your white lab, Misoa, laying by your chair.

You grab her and set her in your chair, "Misoa can keep you company while I'm gone."

Once you sit on the toilet and pull down your pants, that's when you notice it; blood. And a lot of it. You don't how you didn't feel any pain during the stream, but most of your periods were painless. Lucky you.

You grab a tampon, putting it in and grab your phone to call Calum, laughing while you're doing it.

"Y/N. Why are you taking so long? You're at like 3 minutes. By the way, you're on spe-"

"Calum I just- I just started my period."

"...Okay?"

"I'm just saying, it might take a couple more minutes because I need to find underwear and shit." You're crying of laughter at this point.

"Okay- why are you laughing so much?" Calum asks.

"Because I started my period in the middle of the stream and there's blood everywhere." You laugh, not knowing you were on speakerphone.

"Just- just go find your clothes and come back." Calum sighs while trying to hold in his laughs, he can tell you don't know that you're on speakerphone and he doesn't want to tell you that you are.

Once you hang up all of the guys start dying of laughter.

"That was hilarious!" Luke laughs.

***

"Mmmkay, I'm back." You say, setting a towel on your chair and sitting down. You don't know if you leaked through, but you're not taking risks.

"Why were you gone so long?" Ashton asks, smirking behind his hand.

"I had to take care of things." You state.

"Okay." Luke draws out, obviously not believing you.

"What? I was!"

"Y/N, everybody knows. You were on speaker." Calum bursts out laughing.

"Calum! You could have told me!"

"I fucking tried, but your hysteric ass interrupted me."

"I just want to know why you were laughing so hard," Ashton says.

"The situation was funny to me. Get off my dick." You groan, leaning back in your chair.

This was going to be a long stream.

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prorevenge · 5 years ago

Text

Falsely Accused of Cheating, Then Dumped

Date: April 2, 2009, a couple days after I turned 30.

I had been dating a wonderful girl, we’ll call her Ratchet, for almost 3 years. And we were good together, I really did see her as my soul mate. We weren't living together yet, but I was just a few weeks away from popping the question. However, as plans will be plans will go awry.

Enter my friend (we’ll call him Skidmark), who I'd known since freshman year at a well known university, he was also a fraternity brother and someone I'd be proud to call a real brother. This is the guy I would've asked to be my best man, and not as it's often portrayed in cheesy romantic comedies or whatever. That is, until his act of betrayal when he told Ratchet (A LIE) that I cheated on her. Also, he had no evidence of said infidelity.

How did this play out? Ratchet had been staying at my place for the past couple days and I arrived home to find her packing her things. When she saw me, she started shouting at me. A lot of it was hard to make out, other than the profanity but here's what I did remember:

"How could you do this to us"

"I can't believe you"

"Skidmark told me everything"

I attempted to interject a few times, almost in tears in one point when I shouted, "Just listen to me for a second!" but she just got all pissy that I yelled at her, and walked out after telling me to get fucked.

So obviously I called Skidmark a few times, left a voicemail asking WTF he told her and wanting to know why he dragged me through the mud like that. The next morning I went over to his apartment - to find that he moved a couple days ago. How convenient.

The next day, I get a call from another good friend of mine (he was a solid guy, so let’s call him Solid - we met at the same university/fraternity) and it went something like this:

"Um, are you sitting down"

"No, what do you want to tell me"

"When did you break up with Ratchet?"

"I didn't, Skidmark told her that I cheated on her and she walked out on me"

"I just drove past that dive in your old neighborhood, she's with him. They were all smiles, holding hands and everything - I was wondering what was ..."

(I disconnected)

So it doesn’t take the guys from True Detective to figure out that he orchestrated this from beginning to end, and his prize was a new girlfriend – now my ex.

At the time, it felt like this backstabbing bastard destroyed my life.

Fast forward to six weeks later ….

On a Friday night Solid went to a popular bar/club in the area to hang out and throw down a few brews. And who do you think walks in about 15 minutes later.

Why, it was Skidmark!

It was a pretty large bar, and Solid apparently did a pretty good job of not being seen, even though he did see a few things:

Skidmark went in alone, but he's talking to some girl maybe 5 minutes later. A few minutes later, he buys her a drink. A few minutes after that, they're on the dance floor.

A few minutes after that .... let's say Skidmark could have gotten arrested if he didn't have consent to put his hands where they were.

Keep in mind, Solid has already sent me several texts about what's been going on. At one point he included several photos of the handsy dancers. In the last photo Skidmark was kissing the girl.

And now he must be melting his phone with how fast the texts are coming in.

"You gotta nail this guy, Ratchet needs to know what's going on!"

"Shit he almost saw me!"

"I had to skip out of there, but I've done enough damage heh heh"

"He was kissing her in that last one, wanna bet he'll go all the way?"

This is where the plan comes together. I tell him to get in touch with Ratchet, and ask her to meet him (about something urgent) at a coffee shop close to where he lives. Note: his place was over 30 min away from where I lived, so hopefully Ratchet wouldn't be suspicious. I recommended a coffee shop because it's a public place with outdoor seating.

Sunday morning, May 17:

I remember everything about this encounter – what I was wearing, what she was wearing, what it smelled like, it’s permanently etched in my memory. I approached a couple minutes after they sat down. Once Ratchet saw me, her face physically changed, and she immediately got up to leave. Solid reached out and grabbed her arm before saying "You owe me, remember? Sit down and listen!"

She reluctantly sits down, and with a very pissy look on her face she asks, "What do YOU want, Parkesc?" ***

I respond, "What he said, sit down and listen" and I ask to borrow his phone so I can call up Skidmark. I hand him mind and tell him to pull up the photos when I give him the signal.

Here’s how the conversation went:

Skidmark answers with "Sup Solid"

I respond, with the speakerphone on, "Well hey buddy!"

There’s a brief pause followed by “uuuh”

“No it’s Parkesc. I hope you don’t mind; I’m using Solid’s phone since mine’s dead.”

(Keep in mind, Skidmark’s voice in the rest of this conversation is pretty sheepish)

“Long time no see man, what’s been going on?”

“A whole lot’s been going on, actually. How was Friday night?”

“How was Friday night?”

“Yeah”

“Why would you ask man … I mean I … I haven’t seen you in a while.”

“Yeah I think we both know why you haven’t seen me in a while, but anyway, Solid told me he saw you at the bar the other night, getting down with some hottie.”

“Who said that”

“Solid, you know, our fraternity brother from (that university). And, ummmm, he saw you. With that girl. And he may or may not have taken some pictures.”

“What?”

By the way, Ratchet’s eyes are getting pretty big right now, Solid is motioning her to be quiet. She mouthed the words WHAT THE FUCK as he began to open my phone and go to the pics.

“Yeah I got a LOT of pictures. And you know, I think I can guess who would like to see them.”

“Cmon man, don’t do this man. Why you doin this, man? Why you doin this?”

“What are you kidding me? We haven’t spoken in over a month because you lied to my girlfriend that I was in love with and planning to marry. Now you’re messing around behind HER back.”

“Man it isn’t like I was trying to steal her, man.”

“WELL MAYBE YOU CAN TELL ME WHAT YOU WERE TRYING TO DO, because Solid also mentioned he saw you two together. That was TWO DAYS after she walked out on me.”

“It’s not like that man, and you’re not gonna anything. I know you’re mad, but, cmon man.”

There was a brief pause, and my brain almost did a Ctrl-Alt-Delete after that auditory fuckpoop.

“No, you don’t know. And I’m not gonna CMON MAN.”

“Are you kidding me, you’re really gonna …”

“I’m doing this – right now, in fact. You’ve been on speaker the whole time, and Solid isn’t the only person here with me.”

“WHAT?”

And finally Ratchet chimed in.

“I cannot even believe you did this. What the hell? You’ve totally ….totally been lying to me and now you're cheating on me too?"

“No, no, no it wasn’t ….. FUCK! Really, Parkesc?”

“Basically, they’ve shown me all the pictures, I’ve been looking at them this whole time. What’s wrong with you, Skidmark??”

“I didn’t even know her.”

“What you mean, you didn’t know her??”

“Ok, you know what, fuck you Parkesc!”

And then Solid says his piece:

"WHOA WHOA WHOA, first of all, dude, you stole your best friend's girl with a BS lie, you just admitted it, and you're cheating on her anyhow!"

"Fine, whatever, it didn’t mean anything ….”

Ratchet responds with "Oh Please!” before she hangs up on him and turns toward me. She hands the phone back to Solid and he gives me back my phone with half a smile and a raised eyebrow. He probably expected a gratifying end to this escapade.

“Parkesc I am really sorry, I made a mistake. Is there any way ...."

“Stop right there!” I abruptly interject, with a sharp glare in my eye.

They’re both in shock.

“No, you never believed me, didn’t listen to one word I had to say. And you had no evidence, you just took that fuckhead’s word and walked out on me. Was it worth it?”

Solid was pretty much catatonic, stunned into silence. By the time I was halfway back to my car, I could have sworn I heard Ratchet starting to cry. I wouldn’t know because I refused to look back.

*** By the way, you’re probably wondering what the asterisks were for. Up until that point, there was still a snowflake’s chance in hell that Ratchet and I would get back together. When she didn’t even want to hear me out (yet again), I was done. I just didn’t let her know until I was finished with Skidmark.

I never heard from either of them again. Good riddance.

(source) story by (/u/parkesc)

#prorevenge #by /u/parkesc #pro revenge #revenge stories #pro revenge stories #pro #revenge #last10

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drethanramslay · 5 years ago

Text

Late nights, Date nights

Pairing: Ethan x MC (Leah Garcia)

Word count: 4.1 K words

Warning: There is fluff and humour in the beginning and smut towards the end. If you are not comfortable reading it, I have distinguished is with asterisks (*)

Taglist: @miyakokurono @trappedinfandoms @openheart12 @sekizincimektup @junggoku @ethandaddyramsey @edith-eggs1 @ethanramseysgirl (let me know if you want to be added or removed from the tag list 😊)

Songs: Eyes off you by Prettymuch and Unbelievable by Why Don't We

Forgive me if there are any mistakes.

Ethan was pacing around in his office, marching so hard, that it left tracks in the carpet of his office.

C'mon Ethan, Leah is your fucking girlfriend. You can eat her out but, can't ask her out on a simple fucking date??!!

It was their six month anniversary, after months and months of pining over each other. When he thought about it now, he wondered why was he so against the concept? He thought that he was doing the right thing by not giving in, but in the end, he just ended up hurting himself and his Leah.

Leah... His sunshine.

The concept of nicknames never really appeased him. It was such a ‘teenager’ thing to do. When he was with Harper, the word 'babe' made him cringe so hard that it made him want to throw himself off the railing of the mezzanine floor of the hospital.

But with Leah, it was different. She breathed back life into the parts of his soul, which he thought were long dead. She constantly challenged him, pushed him to be a better doctor, a better friend and a better partner. She brought light, to the valleys of abyss and grief. Just like nothing can escape light, Ethan could not escape Leah's affection.

And he didn't want to run anymore..

He had never felt these intense emotions in a very long time. His mother leaving him at a tender age of eleven, made him grow up way to soon. It fucked him up. It made him close up and build walls to protect his heart from such earth shattering pain. It made him distant and cold.

But now he laughed more. Smiled more. And he knew that Leah was the one who saved him.

His salvation. His saving grace. His sunshine.

He decided enough was enough. He spoke to HR and Naveen and they gave them the green light. Leah had already made a great reputation in the hospital for her work ethic, her passion and her compassion. So why waste anymore time?

Ethan was so lost in thought that he didn't even notice Leah come in. "Woah woah Ethan. Are you trying to wear the carpet thin? You just got this office?!" Ethan looked up and saw Leah leaning against the door, with a smile. She was wearing a green blouse with a black pencil skirt. Ethan approved mentally.

"Hey sunshine."

"Hey yourself." She said as she closed the door and stepped into Ethan's embrace. He buried his face into her hair, and inhaled the lavender scent, which immediately soothed him. To him, she smelled like spring. She was perfect.

God, could you be any more sappier Ethan? Be a man.

But he knew, that if Leah even looked his way, he would be down on his knees.

"How was your day?" Ethan asked as he kissed her crown.

"It was so productive. I saved a nine year old girl today. Seeing her parents happy... It was beautiful."

"Well, I never doubted you once." He said with a tender smile, cupping her cheeks. "Also, do you have plans for tonight?"

"Yeahhhh, today is just an ordinary day, with no anniversary whatsoever. I was planning on going home and binging on greys-"

"Sunshine, don't talk shit."

"Hey, but you still love me."

"That I do... Anyways I have made a reservation in 'Osteria' tonight to celebrate our anniversary."

"E, you know that I wouldn't mind staying in bed and drinking cheap wine right?"

"I know, but I want to spoil my baby!! Be ready, I will pick you up by seven."

"I will be ready."

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Ethan rolled up to Leah's penthouse and send her a message. He had donned his black tux but had skipped the tie. He unbuttoned the top buttons of his crisp white shirt. He was going to call her again, when he heard a tap on the window. He looked up and the phone almost fell out of his hands.

Leah stood in front of him, wearing a black evening gown. It was an off shoulder, which showed her collarbones. She was also wearing the ruby stone necklace, her birthstone, which Ethan had gifted her on her birthday. Her jet black hair had been tied up to a messy side bun, a few rebellious strands blowing in the night wind. He steeped out to open the door for her when he almost tripped at the sight.

The dress had a slit which almost went up to her thighs, putting those glorious bronze legs on display.

God, she was gonna be the death of me.

"Wow. You look gorgeous Dr. Garcia."

She blushed red. "You don't look so bad yourself Dr. Ramsey." He pecked her on her lips.

"Shall we?" He opened the door for Leah, like a true gentleman.

"Yes, we shall." Leah giggled and stepped in. Ethan walked around and sat in the driver's seat, and they pulled out of the curb.

The entire ride was filled with jokes, heated gazes and silent promises. Ethan had placed his hand on her bare thigh, slowly caressing it. Leah knew that it was risky to wear such a gown, but she took the chance anyway. And now here she was, slowly going crazy with Ethan's hand on her thigh.

She wanted to devour him. He looked delectable and so very handsome in a tux. The open buttons, gave her a peak of his collarbones and she literally salivated. Collarbones have always been her weakness.

Soon, they showed up at the restaurant. After handing of the keys to the valet, and borderline threatening him that if there was even one scratch, he would have a nice chat with the manager, they headed towards the restaurant.

"God Ethan, you are such a Karen." Leah giggled.

"I maybe old, but I got that reference!! And no, I am not. I am particular."

"Whatever floats your boat babe." She linked her hands in his and they headed towards the hostess.

"Welcome sir and ma'am. Do you have a reservation?" The hostess asked.

"Yeah... Please check under the name Ramsey."

The hostess checked the log book for a long time. Ethan started sweating. What was taking her so long?

"I am afraid but, there is no reservation under that name sir." The hostess replied timidly, after Ethan's cool eyes landed on her.

"Are you sure?" He asked.

"Hundred percent sir."

"But it does not make sense...I called two months before to get a reservation... Do you have any empty tables?" Ethan said, pinched the bridge of his nose, slowly getting frustrated.

"Sorry sir but... All the tables are occupied."

Goddammit Ethan!! You had one fucking job.

He led Leah back to the valet and ran a hand through his hair. "I am so sorry sunshine. I just wanted this evening to go perfect and I had to go fu-"

Leah put a finger on his lips. "No. You haven't fucked anything up. It's the gestures that counts. Also, the night is young."

"But you heard the hostess-"

"Well, I have some ideas on how we can spend our anniversary." Ethan just gave her a quizzical look. She took the car keys from the valet and turned towards Ethan and winked. "Get in the car Ramsey. Get ready for the best night of your life."

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"So your 'best night' includes shopping at Target??" Ethan asked amusement sparkling in his ocean blue eyes.

"Shut up. Where we are going, we need a little more casual clothing."

"But I like your gown. It helps me slip my hand-"

"Shh Ethan!! We are in public. Keep it PG 13 for now." Leah said, as she blushed red. Ethan just laughed, enjoying teasing her.

Leah proceeded to pay for the clothes and pushed Ethan into the changing room with his set of clothes. Ethan simply obliged because by the look of the determined glint in her eyes, he didn't want to be trampled by a woman on a mission.

The dark jeans fit him perfectly and the grey V-neck fit him snugly. He was wearing his slip ons when Leah came out of the dressing room, smoothening her outfit.

She was wearing a black tank top which she tucked into a baby pink skater skirt. On top of the tank top, she had slipped on a denim jacket. "How do I look babe?" She asked as she observed herself in the mirror.

"You know that even if you wore a potato sack, you would still be the prettiest woman I have ever laid my eyes on, right?" Ethan said earnestly.

She gave a soft smile and kissed his bearded cheek. She plopped down next to him and slipped on her white converse hightops.

"Seriously sunshine? Converse again? You literally have so many at home."

"Well I don't have this style. And you know what they say, 'once a converse girls, always a converse girl'." She said as she brushed him off.

"Sunshine.... literally no one says that."

"It's all in the details, E. C'mon let's go."

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After a half an hour drive, Leah pulled into the make shift parking lot near the docks. They got out and Ethan let out an appreciative whistle. "Wow."

Leah had brought them to the annual fair, where there were tonnes of food stalls and gaming places. The entire place had been decorated with LED lights that were illuminating the Boston night sky. The Ferris wheel stood tall and proud, moving at a gentle pace. The place was littered with a number of game stalls like 'shoot the bottle' and 'ring toss' where people competed to get a prize. Fairy lights hung from the trees around there and a number of people were sitting under them, laughing, eating and drinking cheap beer.

On the other end there were a number of food stalls open, which were being catered by the numerous food joints in the city. The crowd near the ice cream vendors and the cotton candy vendors were unreal.

"Oh. My. God. Ethan they have go karting as well!!" Leah exclaimed grabbing Ethan's arm and pointing towards the make shift track. The karts had designs in various neon colors and the entire track had been painted with glow in the dark paint.

Leah continued to point at the different places and stalls, talking excitedly, but Ethan's eyes stayed glued to Leah's face with a small smile. The child like wonder in her brown eyes made Ethan melt. Her voluminous dark hair blew with the wind, caressing Ethan's face. The way the neon lights reflected on her caramel skin, the way there was an pearly smile on her face and the way she clutched Ethan's arm made his heart do somersaults.

"Are you even paying attention?" Leah asked, breaking Ethan from his reverie.

"Sorry, I didn't get the last part. Was blow away by how beautiful the view is."

Leah rolled her eyes and smacked Ethan's arm. But there was a small smile on her face.

"Let's go to the go karting place."

"Oh yes. Can't wait to see you behind in the dust." Ethan said with a teasing smile.

"Oh honey. I can't wait to see your face after I defeat you. If you think I am going to go easy on you just because I love you, you are very very wrong." Leah said with a coy smile.

"Oh you are so on. Winner can ask the loser anything and buys snacks."

"Let's do this." Leah said as she cracked her knuckles.

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"So...what do I ask you?" Leah questioned herself, with her fingers tapping against her chin. She had won hands down. She got a tacky medal which she decided to wear for the rest of the evening. She just continued to wear a smug smile on her face, so that she could annoy Ethan.

"Please, just get it over with." Ethan groaned as he munched on the caramel popcorn.

"Hmmm.... Which is your favourite place to kiss me?"

"Hmmm..that's a tough question.. see, my favourite place is your pussy but I think your neck would be my favourite place to kiss." Ethan mused.

"Why?" Leah asked as she took a bite of bite of the cotton candy, letting it dissolve on her tongue.

"There are three reasons- One, the moment I kiss your neck, you have that wanton and 'fuck me' expression which drives me crazy. Secondly, the moans you let out are....oh Lord. Just thinking about them gives me a bad case of blue balls. And lastly, you become so wet and ready for me... It makes the experience much more memorable." He said nonchalantly as he continued to munch on the popcorn, seeing Leah's reaction from the corner of his eyes.

Leah was blushing wildly. Ethan may come across as a gentleman but his dirty talk made her knees weak like jello. He could speak things that would make a priest blush. "That's not true." Leah weakly objected as she stuffed her face with cotton candy.

"Oh really? So if I do this.." Ethan reached to place a hot, wet kiss on the spot below her ear. Leah's mouth opened slightly at the intense feeling. Her body flushed wildly. Her toes curled as Ethan continued to lick and suck. She felt herself getting wetter and wetter when his teeth sank into the tender spot on her neck. After what seemed like eternity, he pecked it and moved back to admire his handiwork. "....it won't do anything?" He asked in a husky voice.

Leah didn't dare to look at him because she knew that if she would, her face would betray everything. Also she didn't want to see the shit eating grin on his face.

"Shut up." Leah grumbled as she tore and ate her cotton candy more aggressively.

"But I didn't say anything!"

"I know what you are thinking so shush."

Ethan laughed a deep laugh, his dimples on display as he wrapped his hand around her waist. "It's okay sunshine. You can tie me up and have your way later." He said as he kissed her crown.

"Oh look, there is a shooting booth." Leah said, changing the topic before her mind could go into full fantasy mood of Ethan being below her, moaning her name as she rode him six ways to Sunday.

They reached the stall which was decorated in a western country style. "Howdy! Wanna shoot somethings?"

"I'm a healer but.." Leah picked up the shotgun and loaded it while Ethan rolled his eyes. He will never understand her obsession with anime.

"Shoot all the balloons on that board and then you can choose what prize you want." The guy with the handlebar moustache said.

With quick precision, she shot all the balloons in a matter of seconds. She then twirled the gun around her finger and blew the smoke away. "And that's, how you do it in the wild wild west." She said in a smoldering voice.

Ethan and the gamekeeper had their jaws on the floor.

Could she get any more attractive? Ethan asked himself.

"Damn girl.." the old guy with the funny moustache spoke.

Leah gave out a short laugh. "If you don't mind, can I get those rose tinted glasses?" She pointed to a pair of cat eye sunglasses.

"Sure girlie."

After wearing them she grabbed Ethan and walked hand in hand towards the next booth. "Sunshine, what is the point of these glasses if they can't even cover your eyes?"

"These are stylish and I can wear them when I am going out."

"I don't think I can ever understand your sense of fashion."

"Uh duh!! You guys can't even distinguish between 'peacock blue' and 'turquoise' colour."

"Is there even a difference between them?" Ethan asked incredulously.

"A fine example right here."

Ethan lightly shoved her but Leah just held onto their intertwined fingers. She pulled him to her, went on the tip of her toes and kissed him. Ethan cupped her cheek and kissed her slowly and tenderly. The sounds of people talking, the mainstream pop music playing through speakers, everything disappeared as they kissed each other under the neon lights.

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"Oh god...I am so full!" Leah groaned she leaned back on her hands. They were sitting under a secluded tree, with golden fairy lights hanging off them.

"Sunshine, I think you will have to roll me out of here." Ethan groaned as his hands caressed her bare thighs, which she had thrown over his lap. He picked up their popsicle sticks, and threw them in a perfect arc, into the nearby dustbin.

"I can't roll out a 6 feet something skyscraper on my own. I would die."

"Sucks to be short." Ethan stuck his tongue out.

"Hey your tongue is blue!!" Leah exclaimed.

"And your is red from the strawberry flavour." He observed.

"Wanna make purple?" Leah asked slyly, waggling her eyebrows.

Ethan guffawed at the expression and soon she also joined in his laughter. She clutched her stomach. "Oww....shouldn't try to laugh too much. Gosh, I shouldn't have taken that second helping of Quesadillas."

"C'mon let's take you home." Ethan stood up and grabbed Leah's hand so that he could pull her up to stand. She dusted her skirt and then intertwined their fingers. She leaned against him, as they headed towards the exit.

"Sunshine?"

"Hmm?"

"I had a lot of fun today. Thank you."

"You can thank me in different ways later." Leah said, as her brown eyes darked with desire.

Ethan just smirked and squeezed her to his side.

"That's a promise baby."

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The moment they entered Ethan's penthouse, Ethan pressed Leah against the door. Leah's let out a sharp breath and she looked up at the stormy blue eyes. She could see the desire and the lust swimming in those blues of his and she could also feel the desire in her, ignite like a slow fire.

Ethan cupped her cheek and pulled her in for a heated kiss. She went on her tiptoes to meet him half way. With their lips locked in a passionate embrace, she still felt that he was too far away. So, she hooked her fingers on the belt loops and tugged him closer to her.

Getting the memo, he moved closer until they was no space between them except their clothes. Ethan reached to take her jacket off, which he threw across the room. The need to get her naked, writhing and moaning under him, was becoming overwhelming.

She took out Ethan's shirt and moaned when she felt his warm skin on hers. She wrapped her arm around his neck while she laid her other hand on his bare chest. Her dainty fingers seemed to have a mind of their own. They caressed his chest, his back, his abs and were about to go lower, to his happy trail when he growled and caught them.

He grabbed her thighs and lifted her so that her legs were around his waist. He took her hands and pinned them against the door. The kiss was a fight for dominance, where nobody seemed to be a clear winner. Leah slipped her tongue into his mouth and he groaned appreciatively.

He tastes like ambrosia, sweet nectar and all the good things in life. Leah knew that she could never ever get over the way he tasted.

Ethan lifted her with ease and led her to the first surface he found, the dining table. He moved his hands under her tank top and groaned when he found out she wasn't wearing a bra.

"God Leah, you know how much control it takes to be around you? That when you pull such stunts on me, I just want to bend you over and fuck you on the first surface I find?"

"So what's stopping you?" Leah asked. She pulled him in for another searing kiss.

"After I am done with you...you won't be able to walk for a week." He spoke in a husky voice, filled with need. He took of her tank top and growled appreciatively at the sight of her breasts.

Leah smiled coyly. "Don't make promises you can't keep Ramsey." Ethan just narrowed his eyes and kissed her with so much force, that it made her gasp. His hands reached for her ass and squeezed it.

He then descended on her neck kissing and licking the small droplets of sweat accumulated on her neck. He slowly grinding against her heat, making her aware of how badly he needed her. His hands went from her ass to her breasts. He massaged it before pinching the nipples. Leah yelped. Ethan did not once show her mercy, as he stimulated each sensitive spot on her body. Leah felt as if her nerves were on fire.

He slowly made his way down south, leaving fiery hot kisses on her body. Not having any patience left, he just lifted her skirt up and quickly slid her panties out. Seeing her exposed pussy just made his jeans tighter around his growing erection. He blew air on her wet cunt, leaving goosebumps on their wake. "What are you doing?" Leah asked breathlessly. She was finding it hard to keep her eyes open due to the desire coursing through her veins.

"What we do on a table Sunshine.... Eat." His dark blue eyes met her brown ones and he licked her dripping slit, slowly. Leah thought she was going to loose it at that very instant.

He gripped her thighs and threw them over his broad shoulders and proceeded to eat her out, properly . He swirled his tongue on the sensitive bud of nerves and then went on to stick his tongue into her wet pussy.

He let out a moan, which resonated deep in her core.

He never once slowed his pace. He continued to lap up all the moisture. He alternated between her clit and her cunt. As he pushed his fingers in her, and fucked her, Leah climbed higher and higher. Her stomach started to tighten, with the need to release.

"Oh god...I am gonna come..."

Ethan stopped his hand movements and rose to his full height. Leah's eyes snapped open and she glared at him.

"Fuck you Ethan!! Who the hell gave you the fucking righ- ohhhh."

He shoved his dick slowly into her, enjoying the way her walls clenched around him. They fit each other perfectly. Like two jigsaw puzzles. You couldn't differentiate, where he ended and where she started.

This..this was heaven.

He slowly moved, in and out. But Leah wasn't having it.

"Ethan, I want you to fuck me."

"Are you sure you can handle it sunshine?"

"I ain't no weak bit-" Leah couldn't complete her sentence because at that moment he snapped his hips and started fuking her. He held her hips with one hand for leverage and his other hand gently squeezed her throat, feeling her rapid pulse under his hand.

He did not let go of the punishing rhythm he had set. He moved his hips in such a way that he hit her on that spot which made Leah see stars. It was quite a view for Ethan. The moonlight streaming through the glass facade and illuminating her sheen skin. Her eyes half closed, her breasts moving with every stroke and her legs wound around his hips.

"Please, please, please let me come." Leah choked.

Ethan also felt a tingle in his lower back and his abs constructing. He was close too. His strokes became faster and shorter.

"Okay sunshine. Come."

Just that one word and Leah obeyed. She felt a burst of pleasure rush through her body, setting every part of her alight. She saw fireworks behind her eyelids. She hadn't even come down when, Ethan's release caused her to have another mini orgasm.

It was too much. Way too much. Aftershocks racked her body and tears streamed down her face as she soared through cloud nine.

Without pulling himself out, he gathered Leah in his arms and took her to the bedroom. He gently laid her down on the bed and pulled out and headed to the bathroom to get a washcloth. Leah winced and felt empty like a crater.

Ooooh boy, gonna feel that tomorrow.

Her eyes were closed as she tried to catch her breath and get her head straight. Ethan slowly wiped her neck, her stomach and her sore centre, instantly cooling her body down. He threw the washcloth into the laundry basket and slid into his bed. He wrapped his strong arms around Leah and pulled her close to him. He bent down to kiss her lips tenderly.

"I love you sunshine."

"Happy six months, babe. I love you." She gave a tired smile and they both slipped into a dreamless sleep.

Wow that was the longest I have written. *wipes brow*

Like, reblog and let me know how you liked it :))

#choices #choices stories you play #choices stories we play #pixelberry #playchoices #open heart #open heart mc #ethan ramsey #dr ethan ramsey #Ethan jonah ramsey #ethan x mc #open heart fanfiction #oh Ethan #ohsy #open heart 2 #oh mc #ns*w

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mittensmorgul · 5 years ago

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The Tumblr Beta Version: an objective analysis

I was tempted to just type “it sucks.” And while that is an objective analysis, it’s not exactly helpful. I’ve sent several requests to @staff and @support to restore my account to the old tumblr dashboard format, and received the same automated reply twice now. I’ll copy/paste it here so everyone is on the same page:

(lol, I had to go back and edit this, because apparently the beta version doesn’t display block quotes on the dash. So I’ve also put the block quotes in italics... hopefully it’ll display properly... note after editing: nope, it doesn’t display italics either... how the heck am I supposed to differentiate quoted text? I’ll start each quoted bit with an asterisk, I guess...)

*Thanks for reaching out about the beta dashboard.

*We're currently testing it out, and your account seems to have been selected to take part in the test. Thanks for your patience while we work on it! At this time there is not a way to opt out of testing. You may see your Tumblr experience return to normal as we continue testing.

WE CAN ONLY HOPE.

*In the meantime, check out some of the new features available only in the beta dashboard:

OKAY TUMBLR, IF YOU INSIST, though I would MUCH rather have back all the functionality I personally invested into this website through xkit... you know... making the site ACTUALLY FUNCTIONAL. Let’s see what this beta version has given me instead of functionality:

*Change Palettes: Go to the person icon, then click "Change Palette." You'll find the classic Tumblr blue, dark mode, and a few other color palettes for your dash.

So I tried out all the color palettes. In addition to the ones mentioned here, there’s one that’s trying to look like a green screen terminal that gives me flashbacks to the early 80′s. There’s a reason we stopped using green screen terminals... Another one is “canary yellow.” It’s very yellow. The “classic tumblr” isn’t actually classic tumblr... all the post boxes are dark blue with grey type, not white with black type. And all the other colors are the insanely bright fluorescent of the new Dark Blue standard tumblr scheme. Which means links are practically invisible unless I highlight them. It’s migraine inducing. The one theme with a light colored background is called “Concrete” or “Cement” or something like that and even that only works for about half an hour before the migraine aura really kicks in. I just want my Old Blue via xkit back. You know, what tumblr actually used to look like. I don’t want any of these horrible color palettes. None of them work for me.

*The new "meatballs" menu: This is where you can copy the post link, unfollow the Tumblr who made or reblogged the post, or report a violation to our Community Guidelines.

I could do all of this from the user menus with xkit, too. I don’t regularly report violations or have the urge to block people I have chosen to follow. Why on earth would I want to do any of this? And why would I want these features located directly beside the post link copy feature?

You know what I do miss? I miss the xkit timestamps feature. I didn’t have to hover dangerously close to the KILL IT WITH FIRE meatballs menu in order to see when a post was made, and in this era of disinformation and misinformation spreading around this site faster than Covid-19, being able to see when a post was ORIGINALLY created is a far more useful feature than an easier way to block people. For reference: I currently have three blogs blocked. Two of them are pornbots. One is a nazi. If I don’t want someone’s content on my dash, I don’t follow them. This “feature” is entirely useless to me.

*A quick note: Pagination is not supported in this beta test, but we're collecting feedback to send to our engineers.

THIS IS THE ABSOLUTE WORST. This beta test might actually be tolerable if I wasn’t trapped into endless scrolling. If I could page through my dash, refreshing it every ten posts or so. You know why? Because once I scroll about 30 posts down my dash, tumblr starts overheating my laptop under the load of ALL THOSE POSTS. Things start malfunctioning-- it takes longer and longer to load new posts the farther I scroll. And the keyboard navigation (both page down and hitting J to advance to the next post, and even just using the down arrow to scroll as I read a long post) freeze and stop functioning. One of my laptop fans has actually begun to malfunction.

You know why this wasn’t a problem on the old version? If the data load got to heavy, I could open a post in a new tab, click view on dash with xkit, and voila! Brand new tab! I could close the malfunctioning tab and everything would be refreshed to normal! But without pagination, THAT IS IMPOSSIBLE.

Also, after reblogging a few posts, the beta version of this site breaks, and doesn’t open a post tab to add commentary or even tags. It just... reblogs the untagged post with no warning whatsoever. You know... that’s really really not cool. I tag EVERYTHING. Well, almost everything. The tags are the only way to keep track of the 40k+ posts on my blog. And warn people that I am posting potential spoilers, or other specific content. It’s REALLY inconvenient to have to either immediately go to my blog to edit the post and add tags, or even comments. The alternative is to scroll up to open individual posts I want to reblog in a new tab, and then reblog directly there. Ironically enough, THOSE pages actually open with xkit installed, and everything (surprise!) functions perfectly there.

It’s perfectly reasonable to understand why this specific issue has limited the number of posts I reblog. Reblogging content should not be this much of a hassle. Creators have been complaining for a while that reblogs have drastically slowed down, and I think making it even more annoying and difficult to reblog posts will not help this problem.

Also, with xkit enabled, there’s a function that auto-loads images as you scroll, so the images are always visible BEFORE they appear on screen. I don’t have to look at the colored boxes and wonder if this is a post I’ve already seen or something I should sit and wait for. Don’t even think about watching tumblr videos. Loading priority is given to the ads that you cannot pause or dismiss, so that video loads and plays in choppy two second bursts instead of being given priority. Since that’s the content I am actually here to consume, it kinda makes me want to do the opposite of patronizing anyone who advertises here with graphically intense ads. And then when you scroll away, with xkit, gifs and videos you’ve scrolled past STOP loading and playing, which I think might be contributing to the intensity of the resource hogging that’s literally melting down my laptop.

And for reference, I have a pretty decent little gaming laptop. A blogging platform shouldn’t be driving it to the brink of frying itself. I didn’t realize just how much xkit worked to streamline this and provide basic functionality to this site.

*And lastly, if you're an XKit user, know that the XKit team is working hard to update things on their end to make it compatible with the beta dashboard.

And this doesn’t even begin to scratch the surface of what I’ve lost without xkit. And this is a really REALLY garbage response to user complaints. “Oh, yeah, sorry we made our site suck even worse, but those nice people who do our jobs for free will surely fix our garbage soon!”

Dear wonderful people at @new-xkit-extension, I love you, and I miss you, and while I wish xkit worked with this beta version I’ve been forced into living with, I truly feel for y’all who are trying to deal with this nonsense on behalf of all of us.

And to the folks at Tumblr... maybe try to just... make your site actually more like xkit. You know, actually functional. None of these special new features are useful or functional to me. I respectfully request for a fourth time to be removed from this inane beta test.

Give us OPTIONS. Let us display ALL THE TAGS without having to click a button. Let me have back my Activity+ that actually allowed me to interact with people from my dash! That showed me real-time inline notifications in a way that I could reply to with a single click! Bring me back to my column of open messaging conversation icons so I have easy access to the people I talk with throughout the day instead of closing them all every time I refresh the page. I already feel socially isolated in freaking quarantine, please stop shutting off all my avenues of communication!

Let us have pagination! I mean, maybe it wasn’t the best idea to force heavy users of this site into a beta version that doesn’t allow us to opt out until your engineers had actually figured out how to make it work in a very basic way.

*Let me know if there's anything else I can help you with!

YES. PLEASE REMOVE ME FROM THIS BETA TEST NOW. I have let you know exactly what I want from this site. I just want it to ACTUALLY WORK. For someone who spends 12+ hours a day on this site, this beta test version is NONFUNCTIONAL. PLEASE ALLOW ME TO OPT OUT. I AM LITERALLY BEGGING YOU. I WILL ACTUALLY PAY YOU CASH MONEY TO ALLOW ME TO OPT OUT OF THIS AND GO BACK TO HAVING A FUNCTIONAL BLOG AGAIN. WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT FROM ME?!

PLEASE!

I AM OFFICIALLY AT THE END OF MY PATIENCE FOR ENDURING THIS NIGHTMARE.

(one final quick note... I’ve only been back on my dash long enough to make the parenthetical edits-- i.e. adding italics that don’t display and then adding the asterisks at the beginning of each section of quoted text, and already my laptop is overheating again. For reference, I originally typed this entire post from within my tumblr inbox page-- which still functions normally with xkit-- and spent over an hour on it. My laptop was fine the entire time. Clearly the issue is this beta version of the website. I will never forgive tumblr if y’all fry my literal only portal to the outside world at this time. PUT ME BACK TO NORMAL NOW. THIS IS ABSOLUTELY INFURIATING AND ENTIRELY UNACCEPTABLE. Thanks)

(oops apparently i lied... when the asterisks and the previous final note failed to display, I thought that seemed suspicious, and realized that I literally needed to refresh my entire dash in order to see edited changes. Funny how xkit enabled me to do that in real time, which is just another bit of functionality I’ve lost with this beta program. Please guys, this is really, really not working for me at all, just put it back.)

#tumblr problems #staff #support #xkit #was this good enough for you? because I am totally done with this if that wasn't completely obvious #please end my suffering

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