#oh wow sounds interesting :0

[jesswritesthat]

Iwaizumi Hajime: Brothers’ Best Friend

Fandom: Haikyuu!! — [ Masterlist ]

Summary: 2.5k, fluff

• It can be hard when you catch feelings for your brother best friend, but the least you can do is be mature about it and turn it into a game.

Warnings: a few insults

>>>>——————————>

Iwaizumi Hajime had been 5 things to you over the years, some you'd regretted, many you'd denied, but there's 1 he'd finally accept.

———

He was your ‘brothers’ best friend.

Even from a young age, Iwaizumi Hajime had always captured your interest - most would often sway towards Oikawa but considering he was your older brother figure as your families were quite close, you saw quite enough of him already.

To anyone, your favouritism was evident, including to Oikawas' parents who regularly took you to collect Tōru from his Volleyball club practices.

Gingerly you walked past the child players who varied in height but were all taller than you, some recognising you and side stepping so you could locate your targets faster.

All while Tōrus older sister filmed the humorous ritual. You strolled toward the familiar pair, Oikawa immediely breaking into a blinding smile and picking you up with a prideful greeting. Iwaizumi halted beside his partner whilst he lifted you (there was only 2 years between you but at this age you'd yet to grow).

However, it was not your brother you wanted - no, he held you in his arms only for you pout and kick in his grasp.

Adhering to his childish personality, the cute Setter scoffed whilst mumbling curses as he passed you to his best friend who had his arms open already, used to this familiar favouritism behaviour - a smug look sent to his partner as you settled immediately with a content grin.

Happily you allowed Hajime to manoeuvre you to a piggy back position and carry you over to your amused family.

"This'll be good blackmail in the future y'know, I think for all of you~" Tōrus sister finally pressing stop on the recording, you supposed that at her age she had it out for her 'siblings'.

———

He was a crush.

A phase you'd told yourself, just some ridiculous school girl crush that'd pass eventually because above all else, he was a good friend.

"Hi (Y/n), Iwaizumi is here y'know." Oikawas sister said it with a playful mirth to her silky tone, knowing smirk situated on her face upon seeing you light up.

"Iwa?! Really~"

"That's the guy you talk about, on the high school team with your 'brother' right?"

"Yes! You have to me him -them- c'mon." Eagerly you dragged your friend into the kitchen where the two volleyball players were conversing.

"Hey guys."

"Awh! Chibi-chan, did you miss me? I know I'm amaz—"

Fluently you ducked under his open arms, flying straight into the unsuspecting but easily prepared Iwaizumi who only groaned in reply.

"Tch, not as amazing as Iwa-chan apparently."

"You've grown (Y/n), and who’s your friend?"

"Yeah, that's how life generally works Iwaizumi, oh and this Yuki."

"Nice to meet you. Oi, careful, you sound like Crappykawa and one of those is enough thanks." Iwaizumi chided after introductions, leaving you shaking your head but excited to ask your next question.

"How was the game? God I can't wait to start Aobajohsai next year! I'll finally be able to watch you guys for real."

"We won 2-0. Next year you can come to our practices too. We still need a manager and since Crappykawa is going to be Captain, he might put in a good word."

"Not likely, especially since you'll take Iwas' side in everything." Oikawa sneakily replied, giving you a childish face which you naturally returned.

"That's because he's usually right Tōru."

Once finishing your conversation, you left for your own home like originally planned with Yuki, also glad she’d finally met the two most important people in your life.

“Wow, you’re big brother figure is really good looking~”

“Ew no, did you even meet Iwaizumi? He’s so cool, he’s the arm wrestling champion at Aobajohsai.”

“You know we don’t stand a chance, they’ll be thirds years whilst we’re first years.” She’d awkwardly added, but you remained charismatically confident.

“You’re not thinking ahead, I’ll have a chance one day but until then there’s a bunch of cute guys in our year.”

“Yes, speaking of, I finally got the courage to speak to Tadashi-kun today~”

———

He was a protector.

"Back. Off." Every word was deadly punctuated, standing as a warning all on their own without needed the back up of Iwaizumis dangerous glare.

"Who are you?!" The pestered had glowered, having followed you from your friends’ party that night.

"Take another step and you'll find out."

"Iwaizumi, it's fine— I can handle this." You had every intention to, but Iwaizumi stood protectively in front of you and fingers twitching to punch this scoundrel if he dared make a move to touch you, it was best to leave it.

"Whatever.” Then he was gone, storming off in the other direction much to your joint relief.

“(Y/n) you need to be more careful.”

“I was careful! That’s why I messaged Oikawa the second I noticed him following me.” Hold on, why the hell was Iwaizumi here then?

“Creeps will target students walking alone, especially ones like you.”

“Don’t you think I know that? I’m not and idiot an— what do you mean ‘like me’?”

“What? You’re, y’know— you’re ours!” He seemed stifled by his response but he couldn’t exactly tell you it’s because you were considered attractive.

"You can stop treating me like a baby, I'm 16 Hajime! I can take care of myself, besides..." There was brief hesitation but your emotions were too strong. "I need to get used to you and Tōru not being around, don't I?"

It was a low blow, you knew that, but had every right to be angry at both the world and him, especially with that bubbling feeling of betrayal being so fresh.

"What? So protecting you suddenly means I'm treating you like a child?"

"What else would it be?" You bit back again, knowing by this point you were only being hurtful.

"That I—" A pause.

"That I care about you dumbass, is that so hard to believe? I know you're growing up but that doesn't mean me -or Tōru- are gonna stop looking out for you just because we're on the other side of the world."

"Sure it doesn’t, I'm going home." Despite his words being full of honesty, you turned your back on him and started walking.

"I'll walk you."

"No, I'll walk myself thanks."

"It wasn't a request."

Eventually you arrived at Oikawas’ house, storming in and ditching your shoes in his porch - the pretty brunette heaving a knowing sigh. Oikawa would give you a minute, Iwa having now walked into the house moments after without a word, and that’s when Oikawa followed your path and hesitantly knocked on his own bedroom door for entry.

"Don't be mad at Iwa-chan."

"Yeah yeah 'he's only trying to look out for you' and 'Hajime is protective over people close to him', heard it all before Tōru." Came your muffled reply, face hidden in your arms on the setters bed.

"...Guess you have but uh, this is different."

"Tch."

"It's because he's going to miss you, our Ace won't ever admit that but it's true. Not seeing you and dealing with our chaos all the time will be weird for him. You were near the top of his list to tell once he’d made his decision about California y'know?" Tōru sat tentatively beside you, a reassuring hand patting your back in aid of comforting you.

"Doesn't make it hurt any less, finding out I'm not only losing my big brother but his best friend too."

"You're more upset about me though right?" There was a preganant pause, quite honestly you weren't exactly listening but it was enough for Oikawa to sit abruptly from the bed. "Right?!"

"Tōru!"

"Fine fine, I'm taking that as a yes, but anyway, Iwa-chan just wants to make sure you're gonna be okay in life before he leaves (Y/n)."

There was another silence, a quiet sob escaping you that you’d desperately tried to cover up.

"…Where were you? I needed you Tōru and you weren’t there…"

You felt him cease up, the pain laced your voice and he knew it was partly because it’ll be this way for the foreseeable future, but this time wasn’t his fault.

“Iwa-chan was here when I got your message, he was out the house before I could even put my shoes on. So I waited here for when you came back.” They really were the best team. “Anyway, I’ll prepare my sisters old room for you to stay tonight.”

Awkwardly you shuffled into the kitchen, finding the Ace situated at the table, already changed into a t-shirt and joggers he had here and tiredly brooding over some freshly made tea.

"Hey..." The quietened whisper from your lips surprised even you, let alone Hajime who looked up from his cup with a softening frown.

"Hey, you okay?"

"Yeah, I um, I wanted to apologise. You were only trying to help and you even walked me home after I was a crappy friend so..."

"Anytime." There was a hanging silence again, hugging yourself a bit before the brunette awkwardly cleared his throat. "I uh, I understand you were upset, and butting in on the situation probably wasn't necessary so I'm sorry too. It just pissed me off."

"We're good then?"

"Yeah, we're good."

Pausing at the entrance, you sighed quietly - bare feet quickly tapping on the floor and before Hajime could check the origin you'd engulfed him from behind, arms wrapped around his chest and nose buried in the nape of his neck.

"I'll miss you too Hajime."

You heard his breath hitch, muscles tensing under your touch and tentative fingers gracing your own with a gently sigh.

Then you pulled away slightly, the same moment he'd looked back to you, gazes meeting for only a few sacred seconds like sharing a thousand words. Softly you smiled, both of you laughing as your fingers slipped from his figure and you'd walked back to the guest room. Only to find Oikawa sat expectantly on the bed waiting for you.

"You tell him?"

"Not quite. But I said enough."

———

He was a traitor.

Not a phase. It must be a familiarity thing then, Hajime had always been present in your life since you could remember. There wasn't a prolonged period of time when he hadn't been involved - at school, at home, with Oikawa, even on vacations, or via social media.

Maybe once he'd left, once he was no longer around, the constant familiarity wouldn't influence your feelings anymore.

For now though, when you were gifted a moment alone with him that’d likely be your last, you decided it couldn’t hurt to express your feelings. Calmly and nonchalantly.

"I like you Hajime."

"I like you too (Y/n)." He paused, soft and sentimental smile gracing his lips briefly as if resenting his next words. "But you know there's the age thing."

"I know, but I'm in it for the long game."

You could tell your confident statement caught him off guard, yes Iwaizumi knew the topic of conversation was to be handled with care but that didn’t mean he wasn’t perplexed by you.

"I don't want you to wait for me or anything, considering I'm heading to California."

"I had no intention of waiting, our paths will cross again. It's nice knowing you're out there, I'm out there, and we both know. That's enough." You shrugged, leaning back far too casually for the situation.

"Knowing we're both out in the world, I can play along with that."

"Besides, I'll win in the end Hajime."

"Oh yeah? What makes you so sure."

There was a playful smirk on your lips as you sat up a little straighter, hands clasped and head tilted in curiosity. "Well, date me now?"

"No way."

"Okay, then date me later?"

"..." Despite his snapping reply earlier, he now furrowed his brows in thought. "You don't even know what we'll being doing in the future."

"You're not saying no."

"..." A flicker of realisation when meeting your competitive gaze.

"See." You smirked. "That's what makes so sure."

"The long game huh?" Iwaizumi smiled "Count me in."

Oikawa joined you both then, stepping out onto the field and standing before your sitting figures.

"I'm still going to hate you though." A playful punch hitting Iwaizumis’ shoulder as you rose to your feet. "For leaving. I can't hide those feelings very well."

"I know, and it's okay. Hate me for as long as you need to."

“You two done? Let’s go~”

However it was the text later that night which left you more confused than ever.

[ Iwa: Finally. ]

[ (Y/n): Huh? ]

[ Iwa: I didn't give you an answer earlier, so that's it. ]

[ Iwa: Date you finally. ]

[ (Y/n): What does that mean? Eventually??? Later??? Iwaaaaa!!!! 😭 ]

[ Iwa: You're playing the long game remember?  So you'll just have to wait I guess. Anyways tell Shittykawa he better be up early tomorrow, night (Y/n) x ]

[ (Y/n): Tōrus' right, you are mean! 💀 ]

———

He was a friend.

"Someone grew up good." Iwaizumi nodded to you in greeting when you’d shown up to Oikawas’ family home, yourself gladly embracing the former traitor.

"Iwa-chan! That's my little chibi-chan!" Oikawa was quick to chastise, even at your expense.

"Tōru I'm not so little anymore, I'm a grown assed human with a job and rent for crying out loud!"

"With a petty attitude to boot." Oikawa mocked, sticking his tongue at you like you were children again.

"Wonder who they got that from Crappykawa?"

"How dare you compare me to him Iwaizumi?! That's it, we're enemies now - prepare to lose."

"I just got back from California, can't we do things normally for once? Like unpack, then celebrate my graduation by going out for dinner together like old times?"

Yourself and Oikawa looked at each other with offended expressions, mirroring smirks etching onto your lips once you'd set your attention back on an irritated Iwa.

"Nope!" You devilishly grinned, Oikawa already holding up Mario Kart controllers as he finished off.

"We're going to my place to have a tournament, loser buys dinner!"

"Idiots."

“Woah, us ‘idiots’ threw you a graduation party. We’re the best friends ever, you should be thanking rather than insulting us y’know.” Oikawa pointedly corrected referring to the destination later tonight.

“Yeah, when Tōru got back from the airport, we even tried making you a cake!”

“Guys… thanks so much…”

“Iwa-chan, congratulations on your graduation.” Tōru proudly cemented, next you gladly followed. “And welcome home.”

———

He was the love of your life.

It was a beautiful summers night in Tokyo, and you'd come to congratulate Iwaizumi on his recent job offer as the Japanese Olympic Volleyball Teams fitness trainer.

You didn't think you'd be sitting beside him staring up at the stars though, a blissful warm breeze allowing you to truly feel the moment.

It seemed Iwaizumi was the same, content smile upon his face.

"It's nice to see you (Y/n), I'm glad you made it."

"Well it's easier when you don't have to catch a flight from the other side of the world." It was evident to whom you’d referred, his absence always being felt in some way.

"Heh, yeah I got to speak to him over video chat though."

"Ugh that means he didn't get the slaps he deserves." Was your witty reply, Iwaizumi laughing alongside you.

"Nah, but don't worry I managed to scold him for anything ridiculous he came out with."

"Like beating everyone?"

"Exactly. With the team I'm gonna train, I'll kick his ass." It amazed you, that even as best friends their rivalry continued into adulthood.

"I hope you both do well Hajime."

"Hm, I hope Japan and Argentina get to face one another most of all."

"You miss him."

"Yeah." A sentimental smile and Iwa turned to you. "And I miss you too."

The atmosphere once again settled into that of comfortable tranquility. You supposed there was only one last thing to say then.

"Well Iwaizumi Hajime, I have one last question for you tonight."

"I know, you've been waiting. So go ahead." It was a challenge, the brunette facing you with an expectant smirk that matched your own.

"Date me now?"

"Don't you remember? I said date you, finally."

"Finally?" You mimicked again, still not knowing what he’d meant by that phrase.

"Guess the long game is over now huh?" Iwaizumi shrugged nonchalantly, despite his mocking tone which only left you sarcastically retorting.

"Shut up asshole."

"It meant, I may not have been your first love (Y/n), but I have every intention of being your last." His sentiment surprised you, especially if this is the thought he had when typing that text all those years ago. "If that's okay with you obviously."

"It is Hajime, then it's your call."

"(Y/n), will you finally go on a date with me?"

"No." You'd said it proudly, Hajime only knowingly smirking. "You don't get to take the victory lap now. This is my game, and I asked you first. You owe me an answer."

"Ah man, it was worth a shot but the only true loss here is missing the chance to be with you so yeah."

"Don't get all sappy on me Hajime! It doesn't suit you."

"Hey! I said I'd date you (Y/n), aren't I supposed to be a little sentimental with that." Though he seemed confident, Iwaizumi hadn’t hidden his blush very well.

"You might want to make another call to Oikawa, I'm sure dating his 'Chibi-chan' will have him back here in no time. Don't you need his permission huh?"

"Already got it." Iwaizumi seemed smug about it, no doubt probably asking prior to this encounter since he already knew what you wanted to ask - but you had your own surprises.

"Funny, I did too."

"You asked his permission to date me?!"

"Duh, you're his best friend. I got permission before you even left for California~"Not explicitly, but you assumed Oikawa had always known how you felt.

"You really had me from the start didn't you?"

"Yeah, but you had me too Iwa.”

Iwaizumi Hajime was (and had been) your everything. But you were always his everything too.

<——————————<<<<

[ Masterlist ]

[howlingday]

"I NEED ADVICE!"

Blake: "Love advice"?

Pyrrha: Y-Yes... I don't know what to do. Everyone's saying you're an expert at love, so... I thought maybe you could help me!

Blake: ...Of course. As a huntress, it will be our job to help those in need, even something as low-risk as asking for advice. I will help you with your problem.

Pyrrha: Thank you!

Blake: (Thinking) I know I said I would help, but since when was I known as the "love expert"? How did people make that conclusion?.

Blake Belladonna (17) Dating Experience: 0

Blake: Wait- If I say too much, then people will find out! Then Ren will say I'm cute in a condescending way! I CAN'T LET THAT HAPPEN!.

Blake: You can trust my advice, Pyrrha, because I've never been turned down once in my life!

Not untrue, since Blake has never confessed once in her life.

Pyrrha: N-Never... Wow... That's impressive~!

Blake: Y-Yeah... It is...

Ren: (Eavesdropping outside the room, Thinking) Blake's giving love advice? Now's the perfect time to learn about what she thinks of matters of the heart.

Blake: So, what seems to be the issue?

Pyrrha: So... You know our leader, Jaune, obviously. And, well, I... I WANT TO TELL HIM I LIKE HIM! But when I think about him rejecting me, I think we should get to know each other better first.

Blake: And what romantic interest has he shown so far?

Pyrrha: He... He gave me some chocolate. Some Horshey's, actually.

Ren: Oh no... That's the worst kind to give a girl.

Pyrrha: Do you think he was just being nice?

Blake: Hm... Well... I think... he definitely likes you!

Ren: What? How?! It's Horshey's for goodness sakes!.

Blake: Listen, men are complicated creatures, so it's safe to assume they mean the opposite of what they say and do. Think of what those chocolates mean in the opposite direction!

Pyrrha: Then... he didn't give me chocolates because he was being nice, but because he was in love with me?!

Ren: What do you mean, "in love with you"?!.

Blake: So far so good... It actually sounds like I know what I'm talking about.

Pyrrha: Um... The other day, though, I don't think he actually likes me.

--------------------------------------------------

Jaune: Hey, Pyrrha, do you have a boyfriend?

Pyrrha: Um, n-no, I don't.

Jaune: Oh! I figured!

Jaune: I told you guys she was still single!

Sun: Well, obviously!

Cardin: That's hilarious!

Neptune: Ha ha ha!

--------------------------------------------------

Pyrrha: They... They were making fun of me...

Ren: It's heart-breaking, but it's true. I doubt a single one of them consider her dating material.

Blake: It's clear to me... That you have plenty of men to choose from in this story.

Ren: ...WHAT?!.

Blake: Why should you be suspicious of those men? They're people just like you!

Ren: You said the exact opposite not even two minutes ago!.

Blake: This is what REALLY happened-!

--------------------------------------------------

Jaune: Hey, Pyrrha, do you have a boyfriend? Because if you don't I would love to be your boyfriend~!.

Pyrrha: Um, n-no, I don't.

Jaune: Oh! I figured! I knew we were destined to be together~!.

Jaune: I told you guys she was still single! There's still a chance for me~!.

Sun: Well, obviously! She's clearly out of everyone's league~!.

Cardin: That's hilarious! Hooray~! She's free~!.

Neptune: Ha ha ha! I am clearly the most logical match for her~!.

--------------------------------------------------

Ren: This is way too optimistic...

Pyrrha: That... sounds too good to be true...

Ren: Because it is.

Pyrrha: So not only do I have to worried about one boy's feelings, but now I have to consider ALL of them?!

Ren: ARE YOU AN IDIOT?!.

Pyrrha: Would... Would me dating Jaune jeopardize my friendship with the others?

Blake: It could. In the worst-case scenario, he'll be bullied by his former friends. That's how male friendships work.

Ren: How misandrist can you get?!.

Blake: But don't worry, because he'll have YOU~. Just worry about protecting him.

Ren: Seriously?.

Pyrrha: But... Blake, I... I've never confessed before. How do I do it?

Blake: I have an idea... Imagine Jaune is standing right here.

Pyrrha: O-Okay?

Blake: Then you kick the wall beside him LIKE THIS!

Ren: (Flinches)

Blake: Be my boyfriend~!

Ren: (Blushes, Shivers)

Blake: Just like this. He'll be nervous, maybe even a little frightened, but when you whisper into his ear like this, his heart will open and your chances for love will bloom.

Ren: (Heart pounding, Heavy breathing) O-Oh my...

Blake: I call this move, "Wall Kick". I invented it just now.

Ren: Nice try; that move already exists.

Pyrrha: You're... You're a genius...

Ren: YOU'RE AN IDIOT!.

Pyrrha: I can see how you got Ren~!

Blake: ?!

Ren: ?!

Blake: Khm! Um... Ren and I aren't... together like that.

Ren: Exactly! No one "got" me!.

Pyrrha: Really? You two seem like the perfect couple.

Blake: Actually, I'm starting to think it's the opposite. I don't know what I did, but the way he's been looking at me... I'm starting to think he hates me.

Ren: What?! Of course I don't hate you! Did I do something wrong?.

Lie Ren has no form of self-awareness.

Pyrrha: But Blake, you said it yourself! What matters is what's in your heart! So... How do you feel about Ren?!.

Blake: How do I feel...? Speaking from an objective standpoint...

Blake: He's stoic. He's intelligent. He's gloomy. He's kind of creepy. He's not very muscular.

Ren: (Scowl deepens)

Blake: ...but those are all things I like about him! He's really cute; handsome, even! And he's kind, and thoughtful, and generous, and empathetic! And add in the fact he's a genius, and he becomes TOO perfect!

Ren: (Wide-eyed, Blushing)

Blake: Truly, Lie Ren is the ultimate man- (Sees Ren's robe fluttering)

Blake: REN?! What's he doing here?! I need to end this conversation- NOW!.

Blake: Listen to me, Pyrrha Nikos; nothing will get done if you waste your time over-analyzing and strategizing! You need to get your feelings out, rush in, and take care of business! Don't wait for something good to come and help you out of the blue! You must seize your destiny!

Pyrrha: Y-Yes! You're right! I'll go do that right now~! (Runs out)

Ren: (Against the wall, Red-faced)

Nora: (Walks up to Ren) Hi, Renny~! Ooh, you look really excited! Did something good happen~?

The next day, Pyrrha Nikos used the "wall kick" like Blake told her... and somehow got Jaune Arc to be her boyfriend!

Ren: (Smiling) Blake, I made you some tea.

Blake: Hm... He seems to have cheered up.

Future Relationship Client:

[1ris5starlight]

*stunned* uh- WOW- THIS SOON?

(0:12) uhh- what's that sound?

(0:29) uh- why are you eating cereal by the box, Moon-?

(1:38) SPACE?!

(2:32) oh-!

(5:21) what was that.?

(5:38) Moon- not the time pls-!

(6:03) alright, it's fricking me out that voice-

(7:11) yeah, me too...

(7:32) WOW-! THAT'S BIG!

(8:40) 😶 .....sh*t..

(Dark Sun finally meet Old Moon and Sun...!)

(9:40) this give me the vibes "if I wanted to kill anyone here...I WOULD HAVE DONE IT SO ALREADY".

(10:31) uh..??

(12:05) WELL, YOU LITTERALY CREATED A SMALL WITHER STORM!!

(12:49) this is SO strange seeing two Suns's talking to each other-

(12:50) I love how Moon is being protective over Sun!💗

(16:13) ehh- let's just say he does know where Nexus is...

(17:44) is that an best wish or?

(21:00) I just love how Moon watchs over his twin!💗

(21:46) Good job Sunny!

This was an....interesting meet...

I'm concerned of what Dark Sun mean when he said that Nexus is going to be a big problem in the future, because he said that Nexus is going to use one of them as an "Example" for I don't know what....

....

But...if the history it's repeating itself then...maybe that moment will be when someone is going to die....(I'm really worried it will be Sun...).

....

....

Out of context-

More Dark Sun lore! My favourite villain pookie!!

[specialagentartemis]

Wait if the human body needs fats for protein absorption, do you have any idea what someone who can't process fat at all is supposed to do? I'm currently being evaluated for all kinds of possible diagnoses but so far my physician isn't sure what's wrong with me and if it's curable, but the gist is that I literally can't eat anything even slightly fatty without becoming severely sick and immediately having to run to the bathroom. So I can't eat any meat that isn't lean, I can't eat cheese, can't drink milk, I can't eat yoghurt that isn't advertised as 0 fat, and I can't use oils at all either.

From what you're saying about fats, that sounds...less than ideal. Considering I don't know for how long I'll be forced to live this way or if there's anything that can fix it at all, do you know if there's anything I can do to prevent the rabbit starvation you speak of?

(referring to this post) Oh, wow! I’m sorry, that sounds frustrating and stressful.

I want to be clear: I’m an archaeologist, and my primary understanding of this comes from an archaeological and evolutionarily perspective, not a modern nutritional one. Your doctor and your nutritionist will know a lot more about your case than I do.

That said, rabbit starvation/protein poisoning is only really a concern when lean meat makes up the majority of your diet. Not the majority of the meat in your diet, the majority of your diet, period. It’s a topic of interest among archaeologists in particular because it would have been a perennial concern in the winters during the Ice Age: when hunting animals with lean meats would have made up a large portion of early humans’ and Neanderthals’ diets during a Paleolithic winter. Historically, this tends to happen only in the winter in tundra and subarctic regions when grains, fruits, vegetables, nuts, and fish aren’t available. There’s a reason it’s also called mal de caribou.

Carbohydrates, sugars, fruit, and vegetables give you a much more balanced diet and help make up for deficiencies in other areas. And modern nutritional supplements, fortified foods, and multivitamins also help stave off many historical areas of malnutrition. If you are eating a modern spread of foods, even without fat, you are very unlikely to get protein poisoning. You might get constipated when you eat the meat, though.

My understanding is: proteins get digested faster than fats. So if you eat high-protein lean meats, they can move through your system quickly, without your body having time to extract all the amino acids and all the nutrients from them. And then the undigested bits can build up in your colon and make you feel constipated. Fat is digested more slowly, and when eaten with protein, allows your body more time to extract more and fuller suite of nutrients from the protein. Possibly there is also an emulsification aspect going on as well, I’m not positive and it’s hard to find good explanations that aren’t diet-culture-focused. (Fat also does other important things in your body with providing long-term slow-burning energy, padding your organs so they don’t impact against other parts of your body, and absorbing fat-soluble vitamins and such; again, I’m not a nutritionist, and I don’t super understand the details.)

But dietary fiber can also slow down digestion, and can help give some of those same digestive effects. (Nixtamalized) corn+beans+squash is a very traditional diet of the Americas because it gives the whole suite of necessary amino acids without requiring a whole lot of external additions. Also, I get the sense that fish like salmon work differently because of omega-3 fatty acids? So there are for sure things you can supplement with.

My post wasn’t intended to make people worry; modern nutrition and food availability means that there is a lot of flexibility you can have in your diet if you’re allergic to one aspect of it. It was meant to say, even “unhealthy” fats have an important place in a balanced diet, and can do good things for you besides just tasting good, and that craving it may well mean there’s something in there that your body wants. But if fat genuinely isn’t good for you for medical reasons, there are absolutely ways of dealing with that. Ultimately, variety is the most important part.

[myopicry]

Hi hi! It's ya girrrlll

So I read your rant (delightful BTW, I'm a nosey hater at heart lol) and am here to ramble too! :3

Firstly though, I'm really sorry for the situation you're in and hope it gets better. I'm lucky enough to have an accepting family (my parents and sister at the very least) and to have recently moved to western Europe where it's pretty progressive(?) in terms of lgbt stuff (ignore the fascists and right wingers behind me trying to access the governments), but I can imagine how isolating your experiences might feel. Hang in there, there are better things in store, I'm sure!

Now for the rest of your rant, I found that you've raised some interesting points, notably about how amabs can easily take on the lesbian label while some afabs have yet to claim it for themselves due to the homophobia they mightve endured and amabs probably haven't thus far (they probably dealt with transphobia as transfems, which I'm not gonna diminish no matter my views on transgenderism, but they probably haven't really dealt with lesbo/homophobia especially if they're pre-transition). Afterall, lesbian transfems were probably straight guys before, and their orientation is sure as hell not condemned by the wider society.

It kind of reminds me of this one lesbian transgirl ik who I met on a server on discord and formed a group of online friends there which included her. I knew her before she came out/identified as trans and I remember at that time she'd sometimes mention how she'd listen to lewd asmr of girls and such. She also talked about how she wished she was lesbian. So I, being the lesbian debator I am, basically said that that's not a great thing to say (I refrained from saying it sounds fetishy), but she replied with basically saying that I don't understand and that lesbian love or whatever is so "pure" unlike hetero love or something. So guess how I felt when she started identifying as a lesbian trans girl and later found out it's something observable in a portion of the online transbian community (not saying every transbian is like this, but still). (Oh yh she also (sort of?) cheated on her gf so there's that but I don't think it's related.)

I think I feel a similar sentiment as you in the sense that while I can sympathise with some of the struggles transfems may face, I find it irritating at times when people seem to go above and beyond to label/treat them as "the most sapphic and lesbian ever" as you put it, most of the time in an effort to validate their identity and place in the sapphic and wider lgbt community, when they probably never had to face the struggles afab sapphics were faced with since forever and more importantly some say some... Questionable things about their orientation and attraction to women. Not all obviously, but still. Am I making any sense lol?

I definetely don't think transbians have 0 place in the sapphic community, I think it's a complicated matter and there can be some gray areas (I also have grown increasingly distant from the (at least online) lgbt/lesbian community the past year so idrc about most discourse ig), but I kind of wish this was all treated more "normally" if that makes sense and that afab lesbians or sapphic could talk about certain things related to their orientation without constantly being scrutinised to make sure they're including trans folk in everything ever. I also kind of wish we could call out problematic behaviour in trans people without being called transphobic, but I think this applies to specific cases mostly.

Anyway I think I was mostly nonsensical here, apologies, but feel free to reply to whatever you managed to latch onto here lol.

Also, if you ever feel the need to vent and don't feel comfortable airing those issues on tumblr.com for whatever reason, my dms are always open, I check into this hellsite daily <3

~🪼

(wow retroactive preface I go on a long ass ramble about semantics in this I apologize in advance for how many times you might have to read the word "definition" lmao)

hey!! so happy to keep seeing you here around these parts (my inbox, that is) and I'm glad you especially do get some enjoyment out of my far less polished vent posts :p I always feel bad when I post something so singularly interesting to me and me alone because it is just a full on personal blog moment, but to be fair to myself this entire blog is an exercise in actually voicing my own opinions and feelings for the sake of learning to express myself better, and it is nice to know even in the least poignant or least thought out posts, it isn't just fully self-beneficial lmao

I also (of course, as always) appreciated your response! honestly, I admire how level-headed and nuanced you can be with these topics, I myself often feel like I swing wildly from being harsher with my words and trying desperately to be as passive as possible to appease everyone, and I do have to say it is an ongoing challenge for me sometimes to strike that perfect balance between understanding but still standing by my convictions and not solely focused on people pleasing. it's a bit of a weird life, in my private time I do feel like I tend to be highly cynical and sort of an asshole lolol, especially towards other people, but in public I would never dare say any of the things I think because at the end of the day, I do still feel as if preserving friendly atmospheres among peers is paramount to being a productive part of a society. I'm like the opposite of the asshole with a heart of gold trope, in a way. gold with the heart of an asshole lmao

all that to say, I think you make some really astute observations that are still compassionate to trans women who identify as lesbian, while still pointing out the objective faults of their common language and behavior! I really think this (like so many issues whose current is pushed most strongly by the english speaking west) is a matter of semantics for the most part. labels, communities based on labels, and their inherent flaws I guess. because I really have no problem with someone identifying as a trans woman and also having a sexuality surrounding liking women, or if they want to talk about it or even if they want to define it separately than heterosexual attraction. it's their attraction, and I'm not the ceo of how people choose to define their own sexuality (and I wouldn't want to be, that sounds like a headache job lmao). for me, I think the issue really comes with when personal definitions of sexuality are enforced upon others, and when suddenly, highly personal definitions become community-defining ones. the term "sapphic" is such a great example of this weird treatment of labels and their definitions. the term "sapphic" can mean a lot of different things to different people, despite the fact that it is, at its core, a term held together by a single definition. in our society people will ideologically define every single word in a definition differently (ex. what does love mean? what does a woman mean (lol)?) and so even a fairly universal term can be personal based on one's own framework of thinking. BUT the thing is, a lot of transbians/people who identify as queer/tra positive/whatever you want to call the current hegemonic popular opinions of the lgbtq+ have taken to a personal definition of words like lesbian and sapphic, and have decided to supplant the originally fairly universal term and replace it with something that does kind of inadvertently alienate a lot of people who identify with the most "neutral" and non-ideological version of the definition (women who love/are attracted to women). instead, the basic definition has essentially shifted in its meta, though the words stay the same, the meaning is pushed to imply these terms can be understood as "someone who identifies as a woman who loves/are attracted to people who they identify as women" and that's just both too broad and too specific at the same time, excluding those who don't agree with the notion of identifying into what was previously understood as a sex class, and including people who wouldn't have even met the original definitional criteria to begin with. this, in turn, creates a vacuum in meaning, allowing for "aesthetic" to take over as the primary meaning of the term. I think that's where that "weirdness" comes in.

it's hard to find community with people who are coming at the definition of what the community is built on from a completely different direction. when I think of being "sapphic" (other than the brainrotting pop culture/online/algorithmically driven stereotypes) I simply think of being attracted to my same sex, that being female, and that being women. but, I would assume for transfems, they obviously don't have the simple way of just relying on same sex attraction as a definition, because they don't see the world in that way definitionally, and must apply more effort to justify why their attraction to women deserves to distinctively be defined from regular opposite sex attraction. that's where we get the strange insistence on sapphic love being more "pure" or making their entire personality curated towards "sapphic culture". in a way, though on the surface I am still pretty jealous that they get the privilege to express these thoughts and be backed up so strongly by people I know who would care less about me, I do feel bad that they must subconsciously feel the need to "prove" they meet the criteria for these labels because for them, there is no easy, biologically material fitting of the definition. I personally will have never have to care that much about fitting lesbian stereotypes or involving my life in sapphic culture. in fact, I basically can't not be sapphic. it's just the only way my future looks. it's the only way my attraction manifests. people will see me as a lesbian (well, that or a nerdy disheveled teenage boy at first glance lmao) just based on how I don't present in a way that centers men. it's the only way I fall in love.

and yeah, it really would be nice if there was space for a community where we could discuss that reality, openly, in mainstream progressive spaces! but for reasons that would be pretty bleak if we unraveled them, people would much rather play these games of labels and proving your place in them than creating avenues for people to congregate in spaces that actually bring them community and cater to their needs.

as always after these really really tangled word threads I slowly begin to run out of steam so I'll just wrap this up and say you made excellent points dear anon! maybe one day we can all just accept that sometimes definitions should be exclusive in that they exclude people who don't fit them, and not exclusive in the way that they exclude people who do fit them, and that afab women, and especially afab sapphics, deserve the right to preserve spaces for themselves without having to worry about appeasing men or anyone they don't want to!

and wow holy shit this is a whole lot of words trying to pick apart the way words can mean other words sometimes I would not blame anyone if they skim most of it lmao.

tl;dr the meta of labels and their definitions are kinda dumb and I'm maybe more dumb for spending so much time thinking about them

and lastly, thank you for the kind offer of your dm space as an area for venting! perhaps...I will take you up on that offer...it is inevitable I will be struck by another petty urge to vent about people in my life because I continue to work with people who are essentially the most fascinating but headache inducing parts of tumblr and twitter personified and I do still primarily have very "gendery" friends irl! we'll see if I end up having anything interesting to say about it though first, or if I can bear to actually talk to someone online once instead of passively yelling into the digital void!

[izzy-art-879]

Hiya! I wonder how an interaction between Sector QT and Sector OMG would be? :0 🌳🐿️ 💖⚡

(Oh wow, good question!)

Soleil: Sector QT? Hey, guys! It's so long since we saw each other! Whatcha doing here?

Cyrus: Hey, Numbuh 423! Uh, we just got back from a long mission that took us here.

Honor: Interesting. What mission was it?

Cyrus: The Well-Mannered Children had another plan that involved "well-mannerizing" kids and trying to make some kind of Well-Mannered Kids Next Door. They were also teaming up some other villain kids.

Honor: Did these kids happen to be the Perfect Children From Around the Corner?

Cyrus: Yep! That was their name! They seemed to get along a lot...that was until the Well-Mannered Children got mad at us and turned into the Wild Kids.

Cece: Oh, I heard of them! They sound sick!

Monroe: They're really not. Unless you mean they're sick in the head.

Dawn: Yeah, Cece, I heard they tried to eat people. No wonder most operatives try to avoid them on missions.

Cece: You think I could wrestle them?

Dawn: Cece, no. Just no.

Cyrus: Anyway, things got messy,

Monroe: Them Wild Kids beat us up again,

Paloma: And we barely manage to save the day and escape alive. But hey, it could be worse!

Elianna: Yeah! You guys could be dead!

Judy: Oh...now I'm going to think about that. Along with the newfound trauma.

Dee chattered and rubbed Judy's shoulder, hoping to calm her down and her nerves.

Cyrus: So yeah, that's what happened. We're a bit tired from that adventure. Can we crash here for a while? Please?

Soleil: Of course! You guys are our friends!

Cece: Even if some operatives say that you guys are losers, we don't care!

Cyrus: Aww, thanks! Wait, w-what do the other operatives call us?

Sector OMG: CECE!

Cece: Uh, nothing! They call you nothing. Wait...

Sector QT said nothing as they all look at each with awkward glances while Sector OMG glared at a sheepish Cece.

[zahri-melitor]

DC Pride #1 (2021)

Right, I'm reviewing this, largely because 'how many decent stories are in this' is always a consideration for the various themed anthologies.

The ratio of interesting stories to formulaic 'did you notice we are queer?' stories is about right in this. It's one of the hazards of these type of titles: I want queer stories, and stories about queer people, but personally think DC should start keeping house a bit more strongly about how tokenistic some of the stories end up feeling. But this was the first up, and I wanted to see how it started before it evolved.

The Wrong Side of the Looking Glass is a Kate Kane piece that is as much about her identity as a twin as her identity as a lesbian, and how one affected the other. Enjoyable! Gorgeous art! It got a little bit 'there are so many of us who are queer' at the end but I could overlook that in favour of the extremely solid themes.

To the Victors is Midnighter and Extraño fighting a neo-Nazi vampire, and then Constantine picking up Extraño. It's very much a Midnighter story but the violence level could have been higher.

Try the Girl is Renee Montoya as the Question (so not set in exact 2021 canon then hey) where Renee has the hots for a Defence Attorney who's now running for Gotham City Council. Renee thinks she's been kidnapped, Valeria gets herself out of trouble, and Renee gets kissed on the mask (the lipstick stain is pretty funny tbh).

Another Word For a Truck To Move Your Furniture it's the annual unnecessary Harley/Ivy story. Was admittedly probably necessary for the first ever DC Pride to help sell it, but even the team of Mariko Tamaki and Amy Reeder doesn't get it past an 'eh' for me. (DC I am begging you give me some creativity in these stories; we don't need a ship that literally appears regularly in ongoings)

He's The Light Of My Life! is a very necessary attempt to try and fix how glurgy and formulaic Alan Scott's coming out story was in Infinite Frontier #0. This time we actually get Alan and Todd having more of a conversation about things and things being somewhat awkward with the friction between Alan and the way he'd navigated hidden years compared to Todd's far more Millennial attitude to being out, framed around the history of the bar/restaurant they were meeting at. A major improvement.

Clothes Makeup Gift I knew literally nothing about Jess Chambers before reading this, but what I will say is the story's got the same cute incidental feel to it that I've seen in several Wally/Linda short stories in various anthologies, which is a very good association to have when you're also a Flash character. It was lightweight filler but it was charming lightweight filler.

Be Gay, Do Crime honestly if the Kate Kane story hadn't been so great this story would have won best of for me entirely off the back of Hartley's very tired sounding moment when he says "It's...not as simple as that. When you get older, the necessity for systems becomes a bit clearer. Mind-controlling people for quick fixes is not the solution--" because oh wow do I want to say things just like that to a whole lot of people who sound and have attitudes very much like Drummer Boy in this. Amazing characterisation beat, I loved it.

Date Night it's fine, of all the Nia Nal stories I've read in various Pride anthologies so far this was one of the most slight, but I guess it was the very first go around and so that's why it's just another 'running late for a date' story.

Love Life this could have been an email. I am shocked not shocked to discover my least favourite aspect of Pride anthologies, the Justice League Queer, first appeared in my least favourite type of story in that anthology, 'look we're at a Pride Parade!'. It's like a collision of the worst aspects of dull 'hey we exist!' representation without actually bothering to provide a compelling story. It's just so tokenistic and boring.

[yazzberry]

posting the prologue of my high school au total drama fanfic

it is also posted on wattpad: ENDGAME [total drama] by aliasyasmine

link in bio <3

no beta reader so lmk if u find any errors :0

chapter 0: the funny way i feel tonight

— ❈ —

"Yo! Gwen!"

The faint tap of a popcorn ball landing (and sticking to) her head brings Gwen's attention back towards the party. She had been in the midst of zoning out, as her friends knew she was privy to doing, before loosening her lips into a waxed smile at the sight of them—her friends.

Friends. Wow, never thought I'd use that word so fondly, she thought to herself as her ears readjusted to the discordant mixture of blasting party music and blasted partygoers—Gwen could tell from the lingering fumes of weed spilling in from the patio, where everyone would go for a smoke. She considered that she hadn't taken a hit all night, and should likely go out for one later. Thank God she wasn't driving home.

"I didn't realize we were back in middle school, what's with the food projectiles?" She scoffed, picking the popcorn out of her hair and launching it back at its thrower.

"Oh come on, pasty. Don't act like you're above it." He didn't miss a beat as he spoke, smartly dodging her lame attempt at a rebuttal. Duncan—it's crazy to see what his smirk could do to Gwen, even now. But she's not into him, of course she's not. Gwen and Duncan, they've always been the best of friends. Huh, there's that word again: friends.

His playful expression was perfectly painted by the dancing firelight, courtesy of Geoff's fireplace. All the emanating hues of red and orange and yellow accentuated every corner of the den, acting as the only source of light probably across the entire house, save for a few LED strips and lamp fixtures.

Nevertheless, on a night as auspicious as the last Saturday before the first day of school—the final, dying call of summer—all darkness of the night was welcome. And, like with any high school party, it served the ultimate purpose to guise all the soon-regretted (yet presently indulgent) decisions made by dumb teens looking for cheap thrills.

For Gwen, it let her sneak longing glances at Duncan without him noticing. She knew her affinity for darkness would serve her good one day, aside from labeling her as the 'weird goth girl'.

She playfully punched his shoulder, eliciting an eye roll from Heather, whose uncanny insight and understanding of the teenage brain once made her a formidable opponent, but now, an all-knowing friend.

"Ew, is this really any better than third-wheeling with Bridge and Geoff?" Heather said, looking down on them from her comfortable position on an armchair, a lazy arm propping her head up on the side of the couch and legs tucked parallel into the seat. "And where are they anyways? I'm bored." She added, feigning a deep interest with her nail beds as she stretched her hand closer to the fire, trying to examine them.

Duncan and Gwen sat on the floor with their backs against another couch. Duncan cackled as he laid his head back, slightly resting it on the cushion behind him, "Oh I'm sure they're getting nice and cozy in some random room."

Her voice dripped with attitude, lined with disgust, "Like I needed you to tell me that."

He scoffed back. "Well, it's not like you outright asked me or anything—oh wait, you did."

"It was a rhetorical question."

"Didn't sound it."

Now Gwen was the one to roll her eyes, before deciding to be a good samaritan and end the spat before it killed the vibe: "Guys, I'm gonna go get a refill. Anyone want another drink?"

But before she could even get up, another voice chirped in. "Wow I guess this is great timing!" Bridgette exclaimed as she and Geoff set down their load of red party cups on the coffee table, in number totaling five. One for each friend of the group: Geoff, Bridgette, Heather, Duncan, and now, as the most recent addition, Gwen.

"The party turnout is great tonight, I'm so glad everyone from school could make it!" Bridgette sighed as she threw herself on a loveseat, consequently dragging Geoff down with her from their intertwined hands.

Geoff doted on her, moving a careless strand of hair that found its way right in the middle of her face, "I always thought my parties were great, but they're even better when you help me plan them. I'm starstruck by you, babe."

Gwen, Duncan, and Heather, for all their differences, looked amongst each other and shared the same expression, lost somewhere between disgust and humor.

"No way am I sitting through your little love-fest this sober," Heather remarked as she reached for a drink, Duncan doing the same as he shook his head in understanding.

"No!" Bridgette exclaimed, jolting herself out of Geoff's touch and paying indivisible attention to her friends. "You see, I kind of had an idea.."

"Alright! Malibu's got a new drinking game for us to play!" Duncan hooted, raising his cup to her.

Gwen smiled as she followed in suit, grabbing a drink and clutching it a teasing distance from her mouth, certainly close enough to get a foul whiff of whatever concoction Geoff had cooked up for them moments earlier. Gwen couldn't help but grimace at the strong stench of liquor—how anyone could stomach a sip of that was beyond her.

Bridgette coyly rubbed her neck, tousling her honey blonde waves as they moved with her nerved expression. "Not exactly, Duncan, I just thought maybe we'd go around and say some stuff we wanna do this year, y'know, like goals." Then, finding the confidence to properly pitch her idea, perhaps herself excited about the prospects of a new school year, "Junior year is a really important one—it's our second-to-last year before college! Big big deal, guys!"

She frantically waved her arms in the air, as if the earnestness of her expression wouldn't be enough to convince them of it.

"God you sound like my mom," Gwen laughed as she set her cup back down (at a safe distance from her nostrils, of course).

"I think that's a great idea Bridge!" Geoff declared, raising his cup to his girlfriend's ingenuity.

Duncan leaned into Gwen's ear to whisper, "Can't remember if he's in Division 1 lacrosse or D1 glazing." She only slightly bursted with laughter as she tried to feign her whole attention on her too-wholesome friend.

"Laugh all you want guys, but I for one want to have a memorable year with you all," the blonde huffed as she protectively hugged her cup to her chest, as if it were a manifestation of her most sincere ideas.

"Well you've got a point there, Bridge," Heather started, leaning into the conversation and raising her cup to toast with a devious smile, "Junior year will be perfect, because I'll be taking my rightful spot as cheerleading captain and Queen Bee, especially now that last year's seniors have graduated."

At this Gwen couldn't help but scoff, Oh, this is too good.

"Yeah, fuck this year's seniors, right? It's not like they'll wanna go for those much coveted positions either," Gwen spotted her an incredulous look, at which Heather only smirked.

"Well, unlike you, Gwen, I'm not scared off by a little competition, or confrontation." She confidently tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, "Especially when I know that I'll always come out on top."

Gwen didn't dare humor her antics with a response and instead just rolled her eyes at Heather's massive ego. And it wasn't like Gwen didn't pick up on Heather's subtle dig at her—"scared off by confrontation" what the hell was that supposed to mean, Heather?!—she just had to swallow back all angered sentiments and stuff it into the brimming jar of "Heather Complaints" she had, filed away in her mind.

But no. They were friends. Friends! Even with all the qualms, contentions, complaints. They had to (at least for everyone else's sake) pretend they could stand each other and weren't actually at each other's throats half the time.

I mean sure, they had their moments of camaraderie—some sort of pseudo-friendship existing between them—but never mind the fact that were it not for Bridgette's unwavering kindness, Geoff's welcoming and contagious joy, Duncan's uncanny ability to attract all things fun, exciting, and maybe a little dangerous, they would not be friends at all.

Duncan, completely ignoring whatever subtle feud was occurring between the two and taking Heather's toast as an excuse to go in for a greedy sip of his drink, offered his signature smirk and dismissive shrug, "The seniors this year suck; if it means sticking it Scott and his loser girlfriend, I'm game."

At this, Bridgette melted into a sigh of frustration.

"Now that's something I can get on board with. I mean, seriously, I'm so glad we don't have any douchebags like him in our grade," Bridgette added, also taking a drink from her cup (and with no visible reaction, Gwen noted—maybe Gwen was just a lightweight after all).

The gears started turning in Gwen's head. She'd already been apart of the friend group for a whole year now, but even so was still catching up with all the complex lore of her friends' dramas with other people. "Scott..wait a minute is he the person who you guys said st—"

"Yep." Duncan responded before she could even finish her remark.

Hmph, guess he's still not over it. Understandable, though unexpected from someone as stoic as Duncan makes himself out to be.

"Well Bridgette's right," Geoff beamed at his girlfriend, "Everyone in our grade's hella chill." He sat back contently, and, as if on cue, all of the attention in the room was snatched by someone singing, loudly, into a microphone all the way in the living room

"AND I JUST CAN'T LOOK, IT'S KILLIN' ME...AND TAKIN' CONTROL..."

At the sight of Cody belting his little heart out, drinking in all the glory of the generous crowd pooling and cheering at his feet, Geoff's kitchen island being his stage, Gwen immediately whipped out her phone to take a picture.

"JEALOUSY, TURNIN' SAINTS INTO THE SEA!"

"With some notable exceptions," Bridgette said, finishing her boyfriend's thought.

"That's so fucking embarrassing," Heather sneered, her bored expression apparently not quelled by the sudden mosh pit forming in the living room. Duncan followed in suit, taking his eyes away from the train-wreck of a performance, "Remind me to bully him for it later."

"Come on, you guys don't have to be mean. How about you share your goal for this year, Duncan?" Bridgette chastised, trying to find a lighter conversation within his general broodiness.

"Yea pass, I don't have goals," he said, rolling his eyes.

"Oooh you're such a bad boy, Duncan. You don't have any hopes or aspirations—let me guess, juvie crushed them," Gwen taunted with a playful smirk, setting the bait for a much too-humorous reaction.

"If the role's already written, might as well play into it," he nonchalantly shrugged, a similar smirk finding its way onto his face, "And besides, the chicks love a bad boy."

Now he was looking straight at her, and, put simply, Gwen could not deal. "Alright, cool down, Casanova." She tried to play it down, even turning away so that he couldn't see a layer of blush spreading across her cheeks, noticeable against her (way too, according to Heather) pale skin.

"You think you're slick but I see your game, D-man," Geoff professes with a knowing expression. "And let me just say, you're out of luck, because the best girl in school is already taken-"

Geoff tried to give his girlfriend a sweet peck before she abruptly stood up in sudden excitement, even knocking his beloved cowboy hat off his head.

"OH MY GOD!" She shrieked, clutching her phone.

Geoff joined Bridgette on her feet, sneaking a peek over her shoulder at her screen. A matching smile soon colored his own appearance with elation, "No way! Mocha's coming to town??!!"

"Ugh, your nickname-giving skills suck, Geoff. Who the fuck is Mocha?" Heather scoffed, feigning pretension to hide the the great curiosity baked into her question.

Bridgette still hadn't stopped her gleeful jumps as her fingers flew across her keyboard, "You guys know Courtney, my friend from California?? Her older sister got into the residency program at our local hospital, y'know, the one for neurosurgery?! And anyways—they're moving to Wawanakwa!!"

The bubbly blonde hugged Geoff in excitement and the two were in the air, squealing with joy.

Duncan burst out laughing, "Geoff, dude, have some dignity."

But Geoff, whether he heard his friend's disapproval or not, didn't care and kept jumping up with Bridgette.

"Pretty underwhelming if you ask me, especially considering you've never mentioned her to us," Heather dryly stated.

"Yea Bridge, is she the other woman?" Gwen joked, falling victim to her friend's contagious joy.

"Come on guys, you're all gonna love Mocha! She's really cool!" Geoff added, trying to get his underwhelmed friends excited.

"Personally, I couldn't care less. Call me when Latte and Cappuccino are in town," Duncan lamely remarked as he took another sip of his drink.

And then, he did what Gwen never expected him to do—he looked straight at her.

Not at her, per se, more like into her. It was really stupid, actually, how one single motion—it's not even a motion! just a turn of the eye—could have Gwen second-guessing her entire existence under his unwavering glare.

The truth is, Gwen's not as lovestruck as she sounds. She's just a teenage girl with a crush, and while Gwen had never previously been able to identify with the cheesy generic teenage experiences, she felt a small internal victory within the fact that, for once, she finally fit a socially acceptable stereotype.

"So pasty—you gonna share your goal with us now?" He taunted her, his trademarked smirk covering his face.

"Yea Gwen! Come on, share with us!" Bridgette doted as she sat herself down on the floor right next to Gwen, with Geoff sitting down right beside Bridgette, scooping her with his arms.

Gwen sighed, slightly wringing her fingers in her lap. Cheesy as it sounded, she had a lot of goals for this year. And while she was never one to set high expectations for just about anything—with the knowledge that they'd inevitably be let down by some cosmic force in the universe, denying her a happy and conventional life—this time around, the question found her with more hopes and dreams than she'd like to admit.

"What is weird goth girl pining for? Hmmm, let's see, can I take a guess—" And before Heather could even finish her sentence, Gwen threw a pillow at her, having anticipated a lame remark from her direction.

"Come on Gwen! Speak your truth, brah!" Geoff encouraged, raising a cheerful cup at her hesitancy to, well, 'speak her truth'.

As she looked around at all her friends, Gwen couldn't help but revel in the disbelief that a) she'd actually made friends as the weird new girl in town and b) got close enough to people that they actually care about what she has to say. Seriously, her former self would've never bought this.

Oddly enough, her life was perfect in the way it was imperfect—she had friends, and a love interest on the horizon. It was the scene where every cheesy high school movie would cut to the credits. What more could she even say?

"Umm," she started, "I guess this year I want to...do more stuff."

At this, Bridgette raised a questioning brow. "Care to be just a little bit more specific?" she prodded.

"I mean that I want to take more risks, go after what I want, and not let things pass me by because I'm too...self-conscious, or, in my head." Gwen took a deep breath, not realizing that she had been staring into her lap this whole time and couldn't hold eye contact with anyone in the group when she was being vulnerable. But, in the spirit of her professed goal, she hazarded a look up, "Y'know what I mean?"

And all of them, even Heather, offered a knowing glance. "Yes...dorkula." She admitted, hiding her smile behind her cup.

Geoff applauded the side of his cup, "Well that's a toast-worthy goal if I've ever heard one—to Gwen!"

"To Gwen!"

They all took a hearty drink from their cups, even the honored girl herself despite her great aversion to alcoholic beverages.

The burning sensation of the mystery juice sliding down her throat produced a sour expression on her face, much to the humor of the rest of her friends (friends!).

Yep, she definitely was a lightweight.

— ❥ —

"Psst, Court! We're here!"

Another gentle tap and nudge on her shoulder was enough to wake the brunette up from her sleep. It takes her a second or two to come to—her eyes slowly blinking, panning around the car to find a disheveled mess of snacks and candy wrappers thrown askew the floor, a wool blanket wrapped around her body, and her sister sitting beside her, trying (and failing, but waking up from a nap is disorienting anyway) to softly wake her up.

"Josie...how long was I out for?" Courtney asked, sorely rubbing her neck in a sorry attempt to recover from whatever horrid position she had slept in.

Her sister scoffed, blowing an unruly strand of blonde that had fallen from her messy bun—emphasis on messy—out of her face, "Oh, you know, not too long; maybe just the whole car ride over from the airport, so basically like 2 and a half hours."

"Talk about middle of nowhere," Courtney groaned as she took a wistful look out the window.

"Well, I prefer to think of it as small-town charm!" Josie beamed as she hopped out of the car door and embraced the fresh air of a forgiving, 3:00 AM Wawanakwa night.

"Yes, and how charming it is to be so stranded from civilization. Tell me, you do know that Santa isn't real, right?" But even as she teased, Courtney couldn't fight the shadow of a grin appearing on her face.

Josie's energy was contagious, and while sometimes her optimisms were misled on some fantastical, idealistic (and ultimately unrealistic) notions of what the world had to offer, Courtney had to admit that it felt nice to just take things as they came—nice and easy.

In theory, at least.

She joined Josie in getting off the car and stretching her limbs a bit, before getting back to business and taking their luggage out and paying the driver.

"Come on Josie, let's get inside—it's freezing out here!" The brunette called to her sister as struggled in trying to maneuver all six of their suitcases up the walkway and onto the porch.

"Oh Court, hold on! It's such a pretty night, and look at the stars!! We never got these in LA," The latter comment was more of an afterthought as her thoughts fixated only on the sight above, her eyes wide, her jaw dropped.

Courtney rolled her eyes before deciding to indulge in her sister's wishes and bother a glance a upward.

Oh, how she hated to admit when Josie was right. But she really was.

It seemed as though every single star in the galaxy put on its best dress to welcome the Barlow sisters that night, in a true display of beauty that Courtney, with her cache of travelled places and around-the-world luxe vacations, couldn't say she'd ever seen before.

So this is Wawanakwa Falls, a light chuckle and the shadow of a smile punctuated her thoughts.

"Alright," Courtney muttered, "let's get inside."

And even as she started to walk towards the entry of their new home, her gaze was still fixed above.

—୨୧—

Hope you enjoyed this short prologue! Some food for your thoughts:

What do we think of Gwen? Her liking Duncan, shocker, right?

And what about her and Heather being friends-ish so early on in the story? They obviously seem like they have stuff to work out, but most fanfics make them friends way later on, if at all. I don't know, we'll see how this goes.

And also a Scott mention in the prologue—what is his deal? And what's his beef with Duncan?

Drop all your thoughts, opinions, predictions (?) in the comments, PLEASE, I love interacting with you!! The lengths of full episodes will be longer (this prologue was about 3k words and my writing average is 6-8k (!) words), so don't worry if this was much too short for your taste. See you next time!

a. yasmine

[cutepastelstarsalior]

Screw it, just like Hazbin, I’m going to review Hellava boss.

Pilot

Ok, so the pilot was made in 2019???? Wow…Starting off strong, the first thing is a cartoonish drawn “content warning” that the show has swears. Honestly I feel like if they wanted the content warning to be taken seriously, while also having it be based off a drawing, it could have been really cool? Like with some cartoon tiles, shows have the titles change fonts or add special effect. If they just made the warning more in depth, it would be fine. But since they didn’t, it feels a bit mocking?

Richard Horvitz???? The VA for Invader Zim??? WHAT ARE YOU DOUNG HERE??? :0

You can really hear the difference btween professional VA vs new ones. Richard tone sounds more deeper then the others, and his words made more pronounced. While Millie’s and Blitzo’s VA are more softer and quiet.

The animation is fine, a bit fluid in some place, a bit stiff in others. I do like the color palette, compared to Hazbin, the colors aren’t an eye-straining red.

The Imps are a group of hired assassins! That’s a really cool concept!

The humans in this world are a bit jarring when they’re next to the Imps. The humans doctor has a thicker lineart then the Imps, so he stick out more awkwardly

I don’t like Loona’s design. Every time she looks forward, her muzzle is short and squish and her head shape is off.

Blitzo slept with Stolus (is that his name?) to get the book to take them to the human world. Interesting thing, but man that bird guy is a bit of a creep.

The pacing of this show is a bit off, it starts when the Imps talking, then it shows the musical ad, then it cuts to them hitting a child and taking said child to the hospital. Then it goes back to them talking, then it’s a montage about Loona, then that cuts to Blitzo getting the book and that bird guy, now it’s back to the Imps talking.

I like Moxxie. He a a very snarky dude. He also sets boundaries and telling Blitzo that stalking him and Millie is not appropriate. Though him calling Luna a meth addiction homeless women is….bad.

😬😬 R slur.

The child that they took to the hospital is ok. But then the kid calls them out and…eugh left a bad taste in my mouth. It felt like the kid was rude to be shock value? That with the onscreen death and disembodied of said kid?

One thing I didn’t like besides the ending was that amount of cursing. It’s much tone down from Hazbin, (I think? I can’t remember).

Scale of 1-5, I give this a 4. It’s pretty good!

Episode 1

The first episode was released in 2020, that pretty impressive. I don’t know a lot about indie animation, so I don’t know if having a show be picked up a a year after the pilot is a good thing or not.

Another content warning! This one more official, well beside the “horny humans and horny demons” part…

Oh my god is this whole show going to have a musical scene???

The animation is much more fluid now!

Oh wow…..OH wow. Ok so this teacher, she was at work, a one of her students reminded her that today is her husband’s birthday. So she had the children…call him on the computer? Skype?? I’m guessing this was in a time period that didn’t have phones.. But the teacher saw her husband having an affair. She left, after throwing a child out the schools roof, and murder the women. She saw the computer was still on, then I think killed herself??? Anyway the children will definitely be traumatized after that.

Oh the women survive the shooting. But she was claimed as a hero and got a lot of money out of it???

Moxxie is hesitating about killing an entire family. While Millie seems fine with it. I just since she’s a demon, she doesn’t care that much for human? It interesting that they made Moxxie like this? In the pilot he was just a snarky jerk..

THERE FIREFIGHTERS IN HELL???? man they must be paid a lot of money, since hell has a lot of fires. Or are they worked too much?? I’m curious about how the hell works in this show..

Oh, the family are cannibals. Also I’m getting MAJOR Residents Evil Biohazard vibes..

The color palette for when Blitzo was running in the forest is very pretty. Nice purples mixes with red. And Stolas’s bathroom is very pretty too. Thought I don’t like his new voice, it’s to high pitched for me.

“Stolas is a Great Prince of Hell, commands twenty-six legions of demons. He teaches astronomy and is knowledgeable about herbs, plants, and precious stones. He is often depicted as a raven or a crowned owl with long legs” that what’s Wiki says. So Stolas is like, an adviser? What is his job?? One a month on the full moon, Stolas wants the book back and to have him and Blitzo…have sex? Company? Then Blitzo can have the book for the rest of the time….I don’t know how that deal is efficient..

Fire can’t hurt demons, but they can get hurt when shot at…interesting.

Moxxie lets the family life and just called the police to have them deal with it. That’s sweet. I always think shows that have supernatural or villains characters having a heart of gold or a soft spot is a cool tropes.

Yeah, this is a dark comedy.

Scale out of 5, I give this a 3. It was fine, the art was pretty and I love the teacher.

episode 2

Stolas has a baby! Octavia, she cute. Him singing her a lullaby is sweet. And the scenery is very beautiful, I love the colors. Stolas’s VA has a beautiful singing voice..It’s funny when a character has a different voice when they’re singing vs when they’re speaking…

Oh, so it seems like the family isn’t good. Stolas is having an affair, and the mother is very angry about it. Stolas decided to take his daughter out to a theme park, but he wants Blitzo to come?? Also Blitzo wants to have a three way with Millie and Moxxie….hmmm.

Lucifer has a theme park?? Since this world takes place in Hazbin Hotel…when did Lucifer do that?? Also, is hell just full of imps and some higher princes/demons? Humans that died? Did Moxxie, Millie, and Blitzo die? ALOS WHY ARE THERE DEMON CHILDREN??? Are they human kids who died or are they like, born into hell??

Alex Brightman WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE????????

Wejdnwdjicnwkejcnkwedjnwendjwkednwide robot clown….i love you….

Hmmmm.

The robot clown did a small parody of Charlie’s song from Hazbin Pilot. Makes me wonder what the timeline of this show..

I don’t know why but I need to keep talking about the colors in this show. THIS SHOW ISN’T EYE HURTING RED!! THERE GREEN AND BLIES AND IT LIKE AN ACTUAL THEME PARK I LOVE IT.

Octavia ran away and Stolas finds her and there talking. “Are you gonna run off with him and leave me behind? Go away where I can’t find you?”

OW. Poor Octavia I know what that kind of feels like. (Divorce parents, but thankfully no affairs.) it’s scary when your a kid and you think that one of you’re parents is going to abandon you. In Octavia case, her dad is flirting with Blitzo even when she’s in the room, so the doubt in her mind must be very hard to handle. Especially since Stolas can turn people into stone, so he really doesn’t need Blitzo to be there. He just wants the picture perfect family he created in his mind.

Scale of 5, I give this a 3.

[threebooksoneplot]

love this podcast so much! this is probably a bit of a nuts ask but i just wanted to let you guys know that you've genuinely helped me in real life- I was approached by two Mormon missionaries today (i live in the UK so it was Unexpected to say the least) and for the entirety of the conversation I was remembering how you mentioned on one of your episodes (99% sure it was you guys) about how being on missionary is most Mormons' first experience of the wider world so you should do your best to be polite etc. all the context you gave genuinely helped me navigate the conversation so much lmao, you guys are entertaining AND educational 10/10

oh wow!! daaaamn, good for you!

and yeah, that sounds like something we would say. I (G) can't seem to dig up receipts right now but the tl;dr is that oftentimes, door-to-door evangelism of the kind mormon missionaries and jehovah's witnesses engage in is less effective at converting people, but highly effective at reinforcing to the group's members that all outsiders are Cruel And Sinful and therefore you should never leave The Church because that's where the only good and kind people are.

but also, like, 90% of the time the reason I (G) try to be kind to mormon missionaries is because they're like 20 and have never been allowed the simple joy of a macchiato (but must try to fill that void with vile concoctions of dr pepper, gummy worms, and half 'n half, apparently.)

also, let the record show that "being kind" does not mean showing any interest whatsoever in converting to mormonism, or leading them on to that effect! but it costs $0 to wish them a nice day and be a shining example of how wearing spaghetti straps does not in fact lead to sacrificing live goats to satan.

anyway. we're proud of you, anon! glad you like the ole podcast 🤠

—G

yeah this is awesome to hear!! and even to add onto this, that sort of advice is pretty good to utilize just in general when talking to people from these ultra-conservative, super-sheltered (and yes, usually religious) upbringings. like G said, you don't need to lie to them and make them believe that "oh yeah totally i'm absolutely going to see you this sunday and I sure will consider changing the entirety of my belief system/morals!" but, yknow, just be kind. it's good to do even for Normal Regular people you see on the street. but this isn't sesame street so I won't start that brand of schoolyard lecture.

semi-related, but a little tangential: my super-strict catholic high school used to invite mormon missionaries to come and 'speak with' specific religious classes (usually the TrulyCatholic bitches took these) every year. and every year we heard about how "lol the ridiculous mormons keep coming and being nice to us to try and talk about their religion as if we're EVER going to change our minds and believe in their FAKE and WRONG version of christianity?? isn't it so stupid that they're so patient and kind to us even as sister catherine anne stands back and lets us bully—I mean, debate these guys? anyways I wonder when the morons—I mean, mormons, will stop coming back. 😌💅"

and to this day I still think about those guys! because I never understood their willingness to come back every year, and I could not fathom why they were consistently so nice. learning more about mormonism through this podcast has really helped my ex-catholic ass look at the outside world and be like "oh, we were the assholes. I mean, I knew that already, but shit." and tbh i'm sure they honestly loved coming to my school, because nothing will solidify your own stance/opinion on a group of 'outsiders' than a mob of privileged ravenous catholic teenagers. anyways, let that be a refrain for you on your new day-to-day: don't be like the catholics, be kind. amen 🙏

—shannon

[spgothkidsheadcanons]

Hey! I love your writing it brings me much joy! Can you do all the goths meeting a goth Lolita reader? ALSO I HOPE YOU HAVE A GOOD DAY/NIGHT/AFTERNOON!!! ( ♥︎´･ᴗ･`♥︎ )

HELLO THANK YOU SO MUCH I HOPE YOU HAVE AN AMAZING DAY/NIGHT/AFTERNOON AS WELL!!

I hope I wrote these out well enough for you! Where I’m from, we didn’t have lolita or pastel goths, so I’m sorry if it’s not what you were looking for!

Goth Kids meeting Lolita Goth!Reader

Michael:

- To be honest, Michael was kind of an asshole at first

- His style is mostly Victorian Goth (“The only true Goth there is”) (yes, those were his words)

- He was so adamant on the fact that anything you wore was not goth

- And he would know. He was so nonconformist that he joined a dance group

- But the day finally came that you educated him on the different styles of goth, everything down to the clothing and personality types

- And he never bothered you again

- But since that day, if he sees a little frilly umbrella or choker that you might like, he buys it for you

- You’re like his child now -3-

Henrietta:

- Henrietta was probably the first to accept you and your style

- Her style is mostly Victorian Goth with a hint of Romantic thrown in

- It was really refreshing to her to see someone with your style

- She, unlike the others, had a great understanding that there were many subcultures out there, and pretty much accepted you straight away

- She was very protective over you, snapping at the boys when she thought they were going to far

- And if you ever wanted to try a different style, she was forcing you to go to the Gothic Boutique to help you change your style

- Mama Hen for the Win \*0*/

Pete:

- Pete acted pretty much like Michael at first

- He wasn’t as much of an asshole, but he did call you a poser and accused you of not taking their lifestyle seriously

- He went home and did his own research, going down a rabbit hole of subcultures

- His style was very much Lazy Goth, basically throwing anything with the most common goth colors on (ie, skull shirt, black jacket, black pants, his purple winklepickers)

- You actually influenced him to start changing his styles and trying to find something that actually suited him

- You would even help him by sending him ideas that you thought sounded interesting to him

- And you encouraged him everyday he came in trying a new style

- Aww, look how sweet you are :)

Firkle:

- Oh, oh no

- Firkle is a major asshole to you

- He’s so goth that he doesn’t even acknowledge “your pathetic attempt at trying to fit in with them” (wow he’s so mean ;O)

- Unlike the others, he never let up on his lowkey bullying you

- No matter how many times the other’s got onto him, he always retorted by saying that he was the best goth because he wasn’t accepting

- He’s a hateful little dude

- Just call him out on betraying the others that one time, then you’re good XD

[asktoyokoakemi]

I’m interested to know about you (I really don’t know, you’ll think these questions are stupid, but...)

1) do you play cookie run kingdom or cookie run overbreak:3?

if so, who are your favorite characters:3?

2) do you play any other games:3?

3) wow, you draw so beautifully:0!

4) your favorite animal

5) your favorite food:3

💜💜💜

Here's both The Creator's side and Toyoko's side of this ask!

--------------

》◇Toyoko◇《

"No, I don't play the game..sounds like fun though!"

"Well, I do like to play Kirby and the Forgotten land! The armadillo boss fight though..UGHHH! I also play Super Mario wonder annnnd..what was it? Oh! Splatoon!"

"I think that one's for the creator, but I'm sure they'd appreciate it!"

"I really like cats! Me and Kokoro adopted one named Eugene..."

"Strawberry caaaaaake~♡"

--------------

》☆The Creator☆《

"I don't play cookie run kingdom OR ovenbreak, my adhd having ass probably couldn't handle a game like that to be honest."

"Gacha Nebula (It's a gacha mod, the mod I used to create Toyoko.), Sonic Dash, and sometimes Roblox."

"Awww! Thanks! It's mostly editing and stuff, but the praise means a lot to me!"

"Probably the Morpho butterlfy. We don't get em much, but I would love to see one in person one day!"

"I have a lot of favorite foods, but I guess one of my main favorites is chicken."

[cozymochi]

oh wow, your oc/Yuu is so cute😭💙💙 I love that it's a little representation of Tiana (or no? sorry if I'm wrong😓😓) I haven't seen almost many of them, I wonder if she gets along with Sam? ?:0. Also your art is so cool and it looks like Yana's!

It will sound very selfish, I see that you are drawing pictures of yuu's, do you think you can draw pictures of my Yuu?? It's on my other blog (@thenuitinthenorthernlights )me seriously if you are not doing it anymore and I come to ask you 💔💔

(TO ANSWER THE QUESTION: Yes Tia is inspired by Tiana 🪷, anf her relationship to Sam is an interesting one, but I’ll save that for another time.🤭)

And thank u again 🥺😳💕

[mitsuki-komori]

Your Bakery Event Sounds Fun! ✨💖😇 Can I Get Astelle Vanilla Cake With Raspberry Sauce For Fake Dating? 😍 And some Cornbread (For Asta To Say) Too? 💘 Please And Thanks!!! 😭💖😘

“Ah, our precious Yuno has returned! Welcome back! Have you gotten yourself a girlfriend yet?” 

“Father, please…” Yuno sighed in an immeasurable disappointment.

Asta had brought along Noelle to visit Hage with Yuno, like always Father was more interested in speaking to Yuno.

“Oh come on! You’re the only one with the chance at getting one!” Father sulks, Yuno shook his head.

“I’m not interested in a relationship…”

Asta takes a moment to process Father’s words. “Hey, what’s that supposed to mean?!”

Noelle awkwardly stands behind Asta as the three bicker.

Father shook his head with a slightly guilty expression. “I’m sorry Asta, but the chances of you getting a girlfriend before Yuno is about 0%” Father replies as if the answer was as simple as that. The nerve!

Asta out on his angry face and then an idea sprang into his head, one that he wouldn’t even take the time to think about. “We’ll actually, this is my girlfriend!” Asta places his hand on Noelle’s shoulder.

The look on her face was utter shock and confusion. It got more and more red. “Wha…?!” In her mind it was just… ‘WHAT?! GIRLFRIEND?! WHEN?! ME?! DID I JUST HEAR THAT CORRECTLY?!”

Yuno scoffed and tried his best to surpress a laugh. Father’s face was just completely frozen in shock. He looked like a stone statue… “You… Your girlfriend?! With Noelle? Really? When did you two get together? How did it happen?!”

“W-Well… uh…” Asta realized what he had done when it was already too late.

“We uh… We started dating a few weeks ago… He kinda just let it slip out, so… We decided to get together…” Noelle stuttered out. After all Asta has done for her, this was the least she could do… Only because of that! Plus, the way this Father was treating Asta really made her irritated.

“That sounds like our Asta alright… Oh, Asta’s all grown up now! Good job, I’m so happy… uh, for you…” Father pats Asta on the back, Asta spots Yuno’s face and gives him a look. 

“I’m not helping you with this.” Yuno whispers. Asta has gotten himself in… a situation.

Father didn’t catch the exchange as the only thing going through his mind was: ‘Asta has such a pretty girlfriend, and she’s rich too! Oh, I’m so proud!’

“Wow, is that so? I wouldn’t have seen this coming!” Sister Lily walks up to them, and it seems that she had seen the whole thing.

“Sister Lily?” Asta gasped. It wasn’t as if he minded it because he liked her, because he was over Sister Lily, it was just kind of embarrassing knowing that the truth would have to come out eventually…

“It’s great to see you again, Noelle! So you and Asta are dating now? I’m so happy for the both of you, I can tell you two are great for each other.” 

Noelle nodded and took an awkward deep breath. “T-Thank you! We’ve been thinking of… how to tell you guys…!” 

Noelle wasn’t a good liar, but if it was an arrogant Father and little children, she could probably get away with it. Sister Lily was the one to worry about, but Noelle knew even if Sister Lily had figured it out she wouldn’t call them out.

“Woah, Asta with a girlfriend?! Did you guys hear that!?” The children came flocking out of the church’s doors. Did everyone just have the best hearing ever or was Asta going insane?

“Wow, Noelle’s so pretty!” Aruru and Hollo immediately surround Noelle as if she was a magnet.

Recca gave Asta a look that basically told to not mess it up. “You are one lucky guy, Asta. Its honestly a miracle you got one before Yuno.”

“I’ll still be the Wizard king though.” Yuno chimes in. 

“No, I’m gonna be the Wizard King!” Asta shoots at Yuno.

They begin to bicker back and forth as usual.

“Hey… Are you really dating Asta?” Nash asks Noelle with a dead serious expression.

“Uh, yeah…”

Nash stares at Noelle for a few moment. “Alright… I don’t understand why you’d want to be with him of all people, but make sure you treat him well…” Nash attempts to add a pinch of intimidation in his voice, but it came out more shy. Not to mention is height probably didn’t help.

“I will-“ Noelle gets completely cut off by a very obnoxious voice.

“YUNO, FIGHT ME RIGHT NOW!” Noelle snaps their head in their direction and sighs with annoyance. It’s a mystery how someone like Sister Lily was able to deal with all 7 of these immature humans.

“You should join us for dinner, Noelle.” Sister Lily says with a smile. Noelle ponders whether or not it would be a good idea. Seeing as how she came all this way AND that she is apparently Asta’s girlfriend now, she might as well.

“Yeah, sure…”

Dinner was stressful. Asta and Noelle were sitting next to each other and questions just kept coming at them one after the other, and Yuno’s amusement was not helping whatsoever. It was getting more overwhelming than the dryness in her mouth.

She stood up and began to walk out of the room causing a short silence.

“Noelle? Where are you going?” Aruru asks, slightly confused and sad. “Do you have to leave?”

“I’m just stepping out for a few moments, I’ll be back soon.” She replies, surpassing her exhaustion. As soon as she’s outside, she slumps down onto one of the steps.

This was certainly now how she expected to get to the girlfriend topic with Asta.

“Noelle? Are you ok?” A voice comes closer from behind. Asta sits down beside Noelle. “I’m sorry about this…”

“It’s fine. That guy was irritating me anyway. It’s my duty as royalty to humble such ignorance!” Noelle flips her hair behind her shoulder.

“Yeah, thank you for gong along… It’s just that hearing Father say things like that really gets on my nerves… He’s always put me under Yuno, so I just wanted to be on top for once…”

Noelle nodded. “Yeah, I get it. I know how you feel. I don’t even get what he sees in that Yuno guy, you’re much better than him.”

“Ha, thanks.”

Noelle looks at Asta and tilts her head. “There’s still a lot of time to get stronger, you’ll definitely become the Wizard King.”

Asta nods, “That’s right! But… Are we gonna tell them the truth?” His voice gets a bit quieter.

Noelle thinks for a moment. “We can keep it up a bit longer.”

“Really? Thanks, Noelle… Oh gosh, what if they tell us to kiss?! I mean, I’d totally kiss you if you asked…! But uh-“

“What?!” Her face flushed and she sit up straight.

“Sorry, I hope I didn’t make you uncomfortable! Sometimes things just like to come out of my mouth.” Asta scratched the back of his neck.

Noelle turns away, “Whatever! Stupidsta!”

Asta smiles and rests his chin on his hand. ‘Noelle’s so amazing…’

[gren-arlio]

Well, it's official. Welcome to Part 1 of Episode 1 of Arle's Route in Waku Waku Puyo Puyo Dungeon.

(The Waku Waku Puyo Puyo Dungeon Manga always got me covered. This time, you make the context.)

Yeah, it's real now boys. Won't be as consistent as Schezo's route because school is starting soon and all that jazz, but we're here. The reason it's part 1 is because the video is too damn long like last time, so I'm cutting it in half.

Since I'm much better at this than I was when I began, hopefully this one will be slightly better than the very originals.

The video itself:

And now the timestamps:

Intro: 0:40

Small Settings Thing: (5:41)

Info Booth With Kikimora: (6:00)

This seems like a little, but trust me, this covers about 10 minutes of content that's pure text, which takes a lot longer to do. It's for my sake of not overworking. Part 2 is eventual... when is another story. Honestly, this is starting to look like a three parter episode one.

To people who've been here for a while, you may be wondering where the portraits are. Truth be told, stopped them for the top images. Saves time, and looks a little better.

With that, hope you enjoy the show.

Intro: (0:40)

Arle and Carbuncle are great friends.

The 2 of them enjoy walking together, and when they have time, see different places.

Arle:

Phew...this feels great...the sun's warm,

Its breezy and fresh...it's boring!

Carbuncle:

Guu!

Arle:

But something interesting will happen, right?

Taking a walk isn't so bad, but is boring, I'm looking for something exciting...

Carbuncle:

Guu!

[Insert clouds going dark]

Arle:

What the!? What's going on? I don't wanna get soaked...

Carbuncle:

GuGuu!

Arle:

What's up, Carby?

[Schezo appears from lightning. Actual LowTierGod stuff.]

Schezo:

... ... ...

Arle:

Oh, Schezo!

What's going on? Why are you here?

Schezo:

... ... ...

Arle:

Huh? That is Schezo, right...?

I feel bad! You don't have to ignore me! ...I'm sorry, are you in a bad mood?

Carbuncle:

Guu?

Arle:

Schezo seem much more powerful than usual, right?

He felt like a different person.

Carbuncle:

Gu?

Arle:

What? We're leaving? Well, alright, let's go!

Carbuncle:

Guu!

[One day, when she forgot about the event...

Arle and Carbuncle were taking a walk, as usual. They came to what seems to be an amusement park.]

Arle:

What the? They built an amusement park here.

Carbuncle:

Gu! Gugu!

Arle:

What's wrong Carby? Ah! That's Rulue over there!

[Rulue and Minotauros seem absent-minded.]

Hey! Rulue!

Rulue:

Hm? Ah, Arle!?

Arle:

Hey, did you come to play also?

Rulue:

Don't say such silly things! Why would I want to play in a place here!

Arle:

Then why are you here?

Rulue:

It's...I'm here to train!

Arle:

To train? At an amusement park?

Rulue:

This isn't just an amusement park.

All the attractions are maxes, filled with monsters.

Minotauros:

And there's all sort of loot and treasure in there, too.

They belong to whoever grabs them.

Arle:

Wow...it's a strange park, but doesn't it seem fun?

Rulue:

I don't care, I'm here to train!

Minotauros:

Master Rulue, then let's go in early...

Rulue:

Shut up!

Let's go in now!

[Rulue, angry, went into the amusement park.]

Minotauros:

If you're going to play here, I suggest not to.

The attractions are full of danger, and you could get hurt.

Arle:

Ah...

Rulue:

Mino! What're you waiting for! I'm leaving you!

Minotauros:

Yes Master Rulue, I'll be with you!

[Rulue and Minotauros left.]

Schezo:

What? You're here too?

[Arle was standing there, dazed, when a voice called from behind.]

Arle:

Schezo!? Did you come by yourself?

Schezo:

Wrong!

You heard about the rumors of this place, right?

Arle:

Rumors?

Schezo:

You don't know? It's about the attractions.

If you clear them all, you get something called a "Great Magical Item."

Arle:

Oh...really?

Schezo:

Well, I don't have time for idle talk, so I'm leaving.

[Schezo left as well.]

Arle:

Hmm...sounds interesting.

Cmon Carby, let's go!

------

Small Settings Stuff: 5:41

Arle:

Wow...this place is huge...where do I start?

(The player goes to the Menus, and goes to options. It reads:

Sound -> Stereo

Controller -> Non-Vibrating

Dash -> Normal

Flash Stop -> Off

Map -> Normal

Map Display -> Normal

Window Display -> Skip

-------

Info Booth With Kikimora: (6:00)

This took forever.

Arle:

This is the Info Booth, huh? They give all sort of tips there.

Carbuncle:

Guu!

(Menus. My beloved and my behated.

They go:

Listen <-

Rank

Bulletin

Back)

Arle:

Oh, you're the one in charge!

Cleaning Lady?:

In charge? No, I'm just a cleaner, but I help around.

I'm Kikimora. I'm an usher here.

Arle:

Hmm, is that so? You always have a mop with you, right?

Kikimora:

Yes. I don't tolerate dirtiness.

That being said, if you have any questions, feel free to ask.

Arle:

Then lemme ask you something...

(Menu.

Game Overview Explanation

About Items

About The Shop

About Rankings

Troubleshooting

The player goes down one by one, starting with Game Overview. Keep that in mind. I'll put a --- to signify the next one.)

Kikimora:

Well, all the attractions here have a purpose.

You'll be navigating a maze while fighting enemies here.

For many, it's become a fun attraction for them.

Of course, there's all sorts of goods and items as well.

If you think and use items carefully, you'll have a lot better time.

However, if you hit 0 HP, it's a game over for you.

All the exp and items you gained will be lost.

The first attraction is very easy, but they'll get tougher as you go on.

With that, do your best.

Arle:

Mhm...I see...

Kikimora:

What do you want me to explain? (She says this every time. I'm doing this once.)

---

About Items:

Kikimora:

Items are distributed into Rings, amulets, scrolls, herbs, medicine, food, and others.

Rings and amulets can be equipped, but most other things can only be used once.

Also, I don't know the names of the items in the attractions.

Find the name of the items...in other words, find our in your own way.

Arle:

Hmm...I see.

It's quite a problem that you didn't know the items name!

Kikimora:

I'm sorry...I really don't know!

Arle:

Aw, alright...how disappointing...

---

About the shop:

Kikimora:

In the shop, you can buy and sell items.

Money is needed to buy items, which can be found in the attractions.

You can also have a curse lifted or its name identified there.

The owner, Momomo, may seem weird, but he's a good merchant, so you'll be in good shape if you're able to get into his store.

You may even be able to get a better selection of goods.

Arle:

Hmm...I see... (She says this a lot, huh?)

---

About Rankings:

Rankings are done when you complete an attraction.

The system allows you to compete for scores from the items and money you got.

We calculate your score based on three score when you first enter, and after you left as well.

As for items, the less you bring, the easier your searches for new ones will be.

However, the amount you bring in will be heavily reduced.

Arle:

Hmm... I see. Come in with a lot of items then.

If I get kicked out, will it counted against me?

Kikimora:

That's right, though it's not fun to start with a negative number.

The ranking system will have a top and bottom 10, which you'll be able to see on the bulletin board.

---

Troubleshooting

Kikimora:

This where I explain things to newcomers.

We have a bulletin board filled with useful info, so be sure to check it often.

You can also see your score, so try to reach for first place.

If you get first, you might get a wonderful prize!

Arle:

"Might get?" What in the world do I get?

Kikimora:

Actually, I don't know myself.

Arle:

Are you really an usher?

I knew you were probably some old lady...

Kikimora:

If you put it that way, I prefer "Cleaning Lady"!

Arle:

...I knew you were an old lady.

Kikimora:

You're wrong!

---

(Arle goes to the bulletin board.)

Arle:

A Bulletin board...I'll have a look at it.

Carbuncle:

Guu!

(Menu.

Welcome to PuyoPuyo Dungeon <-

Back)

Bulletin Board:

If you're entering an attraction for the first time, try the PuyoPuyo Dungeon!

An exciting adventure awaits you.

-----

That'll be all for today. Hopefully this suffices for about a week.

Catch y'all next show.

[naffeclipse]

REVEAL! REVEAL! REVEAL!

I can't believe it's here! It was so well put together too!! AAAAAA!!!!

The book the BOOK!! I'm so happy the book came back!! And oh man it makes so much sense now why they ripped out that page.. wow..

In Markiplier voice "THE LORE!! THE LOOOORE!!!"

Henry Emily clearly loves cryptids or at least has a strong passion for them and I love it! his love for them is matched with Y/N's, it'd be so interesting to have them meet each other, especially now after Y/N has befriended the elusive and dangerous eclipse demon >:3

The boys have a name!! Many names!! And they sound so cool!!! This one, kuroi taiyō (black sun?) is my favorite! I kinda wanna come up with more names that people all over the world could have used for them. 👀

“No,” you say quietly, urgently, “You’re not… You can’t be.” I love to finally hear these words come out of Y/N's mouth! You're doing it sweetie! You're doing it!! XD

The detector was right from the very first encounter. Rest it's soul. :'(

MONSTER FIGHT MONSTER FIGHT MONSTER FIGHT!!! As always, the fights and action packed scenes did not disappoint, and the gore was as delicious as always~ Thank you for not shying away from describing the bloody and brutal bits, this story wouldn't be the same without it.

Lizard lady is dead! Heck yeah what a way to go!! I really like that she managed to so easily rip off one of Eclipse's arms, even as she was weakened. They were equally matched, however only one of them had something to fight for and protect.

"This will pass,” the demonic voices promise, “Your heart will slow. Your breath will calm. You will be okay. We have always stayed with you during nightmares.”

I DIED READING THIS. If I hadn't been on a train at the time I would have taken a break to empty my tear ducts fully. This is such a wonderful way to make it go full circle, so so so wonderful. They take care of you during your nightmares, even the real ones :'0

“It’s passing,” they growl softly. “You are here. You are safe. Breathe slowly, sunflower.”

“Oh, heart, you’re coming back,” the layered voice whispers in a low, husky sigh of relief.

THEY'RE SO RELIEVED AND SO GENTLE AND SO CUTE AAAAAA I'M GONNA CRY!!!

The KISS THE KISS!!! AAAAAAA!!!! They made a tiny noise to make it clear that it's a kiss!! Of course it's right on the old scar too! The tongue oh my god!! They're really bold to bring that slithery thing out so early for a quick taste!! XD

“We need to consume a heart—not yours.” I couldn't help but laugh at this slip sjdhdikd

“It’s taking much of our concentration to not collapse this very second." THEY MUST BE IN SO MUCH PAIN! STILL THEY'RE NOT SHOWING ANY SIGNS OF IT! THEIR CONCERN FOR Y/N IS TOO GREAT FOR THEM TO CARE! AAAAAAAAA!!! :'0

Another arm lifts, crimson digits gingerly clasping your shoulder. Your pulse quickens under their touch. You drop their hand. A low rumble vibrates their chest in soothing rhythms, like a purr. You wonder if it is, or the equivalent and this is their method of soothing you.

Ok! Two things here! I can imagine it'll take a while for the boys to differentiate between the quickening heart rate that comes with fear and pleasure. In the valentine episode they were still concerned when Y/N's pulse quickened from the pleasure they felt when being held. So I'm guessing the slow fade from fear to love will be hard for them to get through. Oh sweet sweet boys..

Ok and the other thing! THEY PURR!!! THEY PURRRRR!!!! :'D

“Why are you screaming?” DKCBHCHSKJSKFNDHFJS SORRY I THOUGHT IT WAS FUNNY XD

What kind of food are they planning to "hunt" for Y/N??? 👀

Oh the way the boys reach out one animatronic arm and a demonic one when helping Y/N up has me melting! :'3

Naff. NAFF. I LOVE YOUR WRITING SO MUCH!!! Following this story has been one of the most fun things I've ever done. I can't believe we're so close to the end.

Incredible chapter as always! Now please take care and practice all the self-care! Love you!❤️💖❤️💕❤️💖❤️❤️ *Kisses you on your forehead*

THE REVEAL AHH! I was so excited to write it and finally get it out there, it's been a long time coming!!! ♥

@lavenoon made this lovely comic that I think sums up such an interaction between Henry and Y/N. The two are birds of a feather and would nerd out so much over cryptids!

Yes!!! Black Sun! Please do come up with more names for the boys if you'd like, I'd love to hear them ♥ The boys haven't even told Y/N their personal name yet.

Awww, Meep ;-; That means so much to me, you have no idea ♥ I'm so happy you enjoyed it, and I especially love that you connect it back to the Valentine's Day episode because yes!!! They've never had the opportunity to understand the difference between excitement/pleasure in a human's pulse so all of it right now is just a pounding echo of fear to Eclipse. Which, for Y/N, is not unusual in this specific circumstance, but that will take a while for Eclipse to discover and learn.

Thank you so much, Meep! I will, and you make sure to do the same ♥ *smooch ya on the forehead*