#oh i just love animals and their ability to make us panic and think the worst

[weebsinstash]

Hi I’ve been watching Hazbin Hotel and I found your blog which is amazing by the way , and I was wondering what are your thoughts on yandere Alastor ?

Thanks babe! ^^ so i was discussing this with someone recently and, to avoid doing that thing where I have too any concepts on the same post, I'm going to stick with a specific idea I've had of him recently which I will call "canon accurate yandere Alastor"

imma be honest and say this version would fucking suck depending on your preferences because he

-doesn't love you romantically and doesn't let YOU date

-doesn't wanna fuck you either AND DOESN'T LET YOU FUCK ANYONE ELSE EITHER

-probably does not consider you an equal by any means, like he considers you a good friend and you're charming and lovely and whatever, but he sees you like.... you'd be puking into a trashcan and he's the one holding your hair back, "now see my dear, this is why you shouldn't go out drinking without a proper escort~" like there's a vague layer of condescension and there's a huge massive power balance and experience balance between you two

Like. He's. He's kind of condescendingly cunty to you, he's vaguely looking at you with the energy of "MacKenzie oh my gosh MacKenzie you're so drunk, you're wasted, oh my god let me drive you home, no girl I'm taking your keys, you're too--" like do you get what I mean? He's a traditional gentleman and he comes along and uh, he thinks he sees this raw potential and charm inside of you that he thinks is being wasted by your modern lifestyle which can literally include

- your diet

-your tech use or what you use from day to day

- how you dress

-how you TALK

-how you spend your time

-who you hang out with

Just picture he meets you, you catch his eye, maybe you're at the hotel, and he's entertained by your sarcastic witty replies to his antics that maybe even get a chuckle out of him. You're a spitfire and he likes that!

.... and then the next time he sees you you're like vaping weed from a pen, looking at him with half lidded eyes, playing a game on your phone, too scattered to fully hold a conversation with him, to focus, to be as entertaining to him as before, and he's grinding the teeth in his smile, "oh no, this won't do at all", especially when he sees negative affects such maybe you're watching things he doesn't approve of or you're being harassed idk

I feel like since Alastor canonically drinks and is quite a heavyweight apparently, he wouldn't mind his darling drinking, but he would definitely control how much after a while. If you get too wasted in front of him too many times, he'll completely cut you off. Folks are you aware that getting too drunk can cause an alcohol induced panic attack that can literally take away your ability to move your hands and arms and make your mouth numb. I found this out recently :) whoops. And I feel like Alastor sees that shit and you'd have to EARN HIS TRUST for him to let you drink again and uh, I don't think that's possible

You're kind of like a bestie but you're also like a toy he's playing with and he doesn't like to share. He'll drag you away from doing other things with other people, especially if he doesn't approve of what you're doing and or with whom. He basically views you dating other people as lowering yourself to people who are beneath you and would only want you to give yourself to someone who deserves you, and he doesn't think ANYONE deserves you except him, and he DOESNT LIKE YOU THAT WAY so the man is just like FORCING CELIBACY ON YOU. Like have you ever seen videos of people taking their domesticated lovely groomed pets outdoors and like a stray or even wild animal version of it comes along to. Hump. And the owner is freaking out, "get the fuck AWAY I don't know where you've been" or at least Should? THAT'S Alastor watching 'other people trying to predate upon you' aka YOU trying to get laid or date

You'll be cooking something and he'll come up and try some without asking, "Hah! This is terrible!" and either watch you so he can tell you what he thinks you did wrong once the dish is finished or he takes over and asserts that he wants to show you to do it "the proper way!" and if you're female he potentially inserts a comment about how as a lovely lady you should know your way around a kitchen (in like a positive "I'll show you so you can know for yourself" way but like the underlying misogyny is there lol)

He'll take you out drinking and dancing but don't you dare let him catch you throwing it back or being mildly sexual, or he'll immediately tell you you've had too much to drink and take you home and you two spend the rest of the night like drinking tea listening to the radio, reading books, or watching old timey TV.

Lastly... I can absolutely see Alastor making some kind of deal with his darling for their soul. He CAN do that (and I think technically anyone in Hell can deal with souls, it's apparently part of the becoming an Overlord process). But I can just see him taking his darling's soul in exchange for anything, it might be really small, it might be really important, but he sees it as safeguarding your beautiful lovely little soul from anyone else who might take it. It truly is like THE HIGHEST FORM OF OWNING YOU, CONTROLLING YOU. It's all according to whatever is in the deal, but I'm sure there's other basic caveats you get... like him being able to summon you at will if you agree to it so he's randomly yanking you away from other people or tracking you when he doesn't know when you are.... or restraining you so you stop running away from him and running out on the town to act so... vulgar

[blues824]

Twisted Wonderland's Housewardens with a GN!Saiki!s/o; reacting to the news that they're a psychic.

Riddle Rosehearts

Even though he would prefer to be isolated from others, he is sad that you don’t accept anyone as your friend, much less your significant other. This is when you use your telepathy to tell him that you can read minds. He is very embarrassed, so please let him know that you return his feelings.

He understands your sweet tooth, as he has one himself. He will try and get Trey to teach him how to make coffee jelly so that you don’t have to keep buying it from Sam’s shop. The effort was heartwarming, and really piqued your interest. 

You both can talk to the hedgehogs and flamingos in different ways; he knows their language and you can speak with them telepathically. The flamboyance and the array all love you (much to your slight annoyance), and you have to admit that they are adorable. Whenever Riddle sees you interact with the animals, he just gets a warm feeling in his chest.

Leona Kingscholar

Sarcasm at its finest. You both like to be alone, so you tend to be alone together. Whenever he’s asleep, you can see his dreams, and a lot of them are about you. This fact does make you blush just a tiny bit, but you never tell him that you can until much later in your relationship.

He does not understand your sweet tooth, but he will have Reggie supply you with some coffee jelly. Leona prefers more savory foods like meat, so he will find it annoying whenever you do anything for your beloved treat. He swears you love it more than him, and it’s probably true.

You have the ability to talk to him telepathically, so you both don’t even have to be near each other. You can hear his thoughts, and you can speak to him through his mind. It’s actually very convenient for the two of you, as you don't have to look for each other or make the effort of texting each other.

Azul Ashengrotto 

Oh, please don’t tell him that you can read his mind. Other than being concerned with matters consisting of his multitude of contracts, the tweels, and the Mostro Lounge, 95% of his thoughts are about you. Mans would grow more red than Riddle’s hair if you informed him that you were psychic.

His favorite dish is fried chicken (can’t blame him), so he has a preference towards savory foods. However, sometimes he wants something sweet. That’s where you come in and convince him to add coffee jelly to the Lounge’s menu so that you can enjoy it freshly made. 

You have the ability to talk to the fish in the tank, as does Azul. It’s very intriguing for you to hear them speak, since you made it so that the cecaelia could actually hear the marine life saying words. A few of them were angry that other fishes did something, so there were a lot of curses.

Kalim Al-Asim

I feel like he would be the kind to have his head empty, which makes you panic because you can’t read his mind. However, you can tell that he’s very genuine in his joy (alliteration goes crazy sometimes). If you told him that you were psychic, he probably didn’t understand what that was.

He likes coconut, right? He likes sweeter things, if I’m correct. That being said, he can’t blame you when you get a sweet tooth. He is probably your main source of coffee jelly, since he would order some just for you. He tried it once and didn’t really like it, but you love it and he loves you.

If you talk to Jamil, you’re already talking to a snake (/j, but not really). Anyways, you can talk to any of the animals that Kalim gets on a whim, and they’re all annoyed that the young Asim doesn’t know when not to spend money on impulse. Honestly, all of those animals are just a mood.

Vil Schoenheit

His mind never turns off. He’s always thinking about something, and it honestly gives you a headache. As the two of you often sit with each other to squeeze in time to be a semi-normal couple. You can tell that sometimes he’s not present because he’s planning his day through. You often have to tell him to slow his mind.

If I remember correctly, he likes smoothies. You like coffee jelly. Vil knows that it’s not the healthiest, so he tries to offer you a deal: you both can enjoy it once a month so that you can think of it as more of a reward than a treat. He is aware that you can off him with a single thought, but he doesn’t care.

You like to brighten up his day by talking to him telepathically whenever he’s too busy. It’s a bit out of character for you, but you know that it makes him feel a bit better. Knowing that you support him even from far away is comforting for him.

Idia Shroud

Please don’t tell him you can read his mind, Part 2. Mans would panic. Like Azul, his mind is constantly thinking about you, and maybe a new anime he watched or a new video game he played. His hair along with his face grows bright red when you tell him that you are psychic.

Idia likes candy, so he completely understands your little (huge) sweet tooth. Whenever you tell him telepathically that you are coming over, he makes sure that he has coffee jelly on hand so that you continue to like him (he’s insecure, so he uses your love of food to his advantage). 

You often like to spook him by just using your telepathy to tell him something, especially when he’s out for a club meeting. The cecaelia he likes to play board games with is often confused when he sees the eldest Shroud brother jump because you scared him.

Malleus Draconia

He thinks your powers are amazing. What’s amusing to him is how you constantly fight with Sebek because you were a very sarcastic (borderline rude) person. Malleus often had to calm his knight down after every single fight you both had, but the prince couldn’t help a small smile that appeared on his face.

Malleus enjoys ice cream, but he wouldn’t mind trying his beloved’s favorite dessert. He doesn’t dislike it, but he prefers to stick to his favorite. However, don’t be surprised if you see an elegantly wrapped package of coffee jelly at the front door of your dormitory, signed M.D.

Whenever you decide to use your telepathy, it’s usually when he gives you a sign that he can’t get away from his retainers. You both have full-blown conversations with each other and neither Lilia, Silver, nor Sebek notice because his face would be great in poker.

[hazbin-a-helluvamagines]

Bee, Ozzie (+ Fizz, if you wanna) and Loona with a shy, human male S/O who has metahuman abilities, specifically time manipulation (controlling the flow of time, such as speeding it up, slowing it down, moving it forward, moving it back, etc) and time alteration (changing the time around an object, either inanimate or living, and making that object into a different thing entirely, with living things still retaining their sentience, but are unable to move)

Sorry if this is long and/or hyper specific.

Ozzie + Fizz, Bee, and Loona with a Shy, Human Male S/O with metahuman abilities

Both Asmodeus and Fizzarolli think you're extremely cool! They're both really sweet to you, though. The last thing they need is for you to have a panic attack on them!

"Fuck, you can mess with time?! That shit's pretty scary~!" Fizzarolli would tease playfully in a sing-song voice.

"Can you show us how it works, baby?" Ozzie would ask you. Of course, he'll understand if you say no or refuse. He's just happy to give you the opportunity to talk about yourself.

Since you're shy, they'll be the first to open up all sorts of doors for you to interject your opinion into things, too. Plus, with you being human, Ozzie in particular would be incredibly protective of you.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?! I'll destroy any motherfucker who tries to hurt my boyfriend!" Ozzie would shout after someone had been harassing you. And Fizzarolli would quickly join in.

"Yeah, our boyfriend is wayyyyy too good for a piece of shit like you," he'd say in that smug tone he always used on people he didn't like and wanted to taunt.

Honestly, they'd both want to kind of see you snap. You've earned it dealing with all the bullshit in Hell. Change that Karen into a pot or something, and let her be in agony stuck that way for the rest of her life in Hell. Or age her so much that her husband won't ever want her again (as if he even does now- 🤭)

A wholesome pair, certainly, but with their darker, more mischievous sides!!

They'll probably bring you to Ozzie's with them so they can better keep an eye on you. After all, they don't want to watch anyone try to hurt you without being able to stop it.

No, Ozzie learned his lesson after OOPS with Fizz-

Oh boy. You're in for a treat with our lovely Queen Bee.

See, it isn't necessarily that she's mean about you being shy, it's just that she doesn't quite understand it. After all, she's a total party animal, she can't understand people who don't enjoy getting scrappy and having fun!

She'd be the type to first offer you drugs to help you loosen up, insisting she can get you anything that your heart desires.

"C'mon, babe! Alcohol? Sugar? Fentanyl? Ketamine? Oxy? Chardonnay? Come on, anything you want, just lemme know! We gotta be ready to tear this shit up together!"

She's only being playful, of course. She's trying her hardest to understand, she really is. Once she understands it more of an aspect of your personality, rather than a problem she needs to fix, she's a lot more chill.

"Hey, hun, I know you're not really a fan of socializing at my parties. Wanna go to a private section of the place and just chill with me?"

She's also so sweet, she'll offer you any accommodations you may need! Comfort foods? No problem! Cuddles? You got it! Her attention? You don't even need to ask!

She's a lot less focused on your abilities than some of the others. But still finds them really cool, although more for just messing around!

"So are you telling me you could totally turn that plant over there back into a seed?! Yeah! Do it! C'mon, show me, babe!"

Probably finds it really hot how powerful you are, actually.

The Gluttony Ring is a lot more chill, so she's a lot more comfortable leaving you by yourself as a human there than in, say, the Lust or Pride Rings. Most everybody in Gluttony is sweet.

After all, nobody would really want to get on her bad side, anyway.

And yet, if you approached her with any sort of issues... i.e., someone tried spiking your drink, someone spilled a drink on you, you're being made fun of, etc., out comes the monstrous Bee form. It's their own fault!

"Which of you fucking bitches tried some shit on S/O?! I'll fuck you up so hard that not even all the ketamine in the world will numb your stupid ass!"

It's honestly amazing how protective someone normally so chill can be when their S/O is human.

You're shy, male, have powers, and above all, are human?! Oh no, no, no. Don't ever let her dad find out, he will be at your house the same day-

Aside from that, she pretends not to care much about your abilities. After all, she's more interested in you, not what you can do. And she finds your abilities impressive, and something she'll secretly record so she can remember how cool it was, but she'll avoid bringing it up. She never knows if it's a sore spot for you, after all.

Since you're shy, she'll take it on herself to tease an embarrass you in public, but only playfully and as much as you're comfortable with. All you have to do is say the word and she'll stop and never do it again. Kisses to the cheek, pulling you to sit on her lap (or vice versa), sickeningly sweet couple photos, you name it, she's already on it, most likely.

Of course, only she's allowed to do it. Anyone else who tries is already basically a goner, because they're going to be unrecognizable by the time Loona is done mauling them- Who's to say Hellhounds aren't loyal and devoted?

With that said, if someone ever messed with you,

She's pretty chill with you, though, just acting very normal and a little more sweet. Not quite as abrasive as she is toward Blitzø, for example.

"Hey, S/O. There's this thing coming up in the Greed Ring next week. Wanna go? You don't have to, it's just an idea."

Since you're human, and she both lives and works in the Pride Ring, which is full of sinners, don't expect to EVER be left alone.

She can't risk one of those awful creatures getting their hands on you and hurting you! No, she'll be at your side 24/7, insisting you call her just to be able to leave your house for the day. It may seem overprotective, something that apparently runs in the family, but she just doesn't want to see you get hurt.

"C'mon, S/O. I promise it's not personal. But Pride is full of shitty people with shitty personalities and shitty crimes that got them sent to this shitty place. 'Kay?"

She does care, even if she doesn't always show it all the time. <3

[drippingmoon]

Another Get to Know Me

Tags courtesy of @sleepy-night-child and @splashinkling aaand thanks a lot you two, I loved seeing yours🤩❤

a band you don't like that many others do

Hmm. I'm not really keeping up with people's music tastes anymore (except for you guys). But in middle school, everyone was obsessed with Panic! At the Disco, while I just couldn't vibe with them, so I was mildly worried I'd get defenestrated for it. I didn't, though the chairs did (my class was unique in that they'd slingshot chair seats out of the window by thing them with curtain beads, and they'd kinda just peacefully swing in and out till recess was over)

least favorite animal and why

Nightfriend, I feel like you're making me commit sins (though not really since insects are animals, but it does not feel so??), soo, I raise you: earwigs. Like. My Good Sir. Was there any need for you to grow pincers on your arse to look like you're gonna pull my brain through my ears? No? So please.

hot fandom take

I don't really have any. My fandoms have always been veeery small, even limited to one person (me. Waving, hello!), I'll just hand everyone hot tea and chill🍵

do you wear any jewelry, if so, what's your favorite piece

Not a jewelry person. I did use to have a kitty brooch... but the thing with brooches is, they are perfect for self-poking especially when you're so naturally inclined, so I gave it up.

a movie others liked that you didn't

Ouch, I'm really so out of touch with movies, and these days I'm watching what's very much not popular with people (except for Interstellar. Interstellar is baby). Probably any of the Pride and Prejudice adaptations, I had to go through them for a course, and you couldn't pay me to sit down with them again.

three things you love about yourself

*sees the question and shakes it like a snow globe*

These things so do not come naturally to me. Probably because I'm the type never to think if I can do something and just act, so pride just feels like spur-of-the-moment joy. Though, I'm really starting to think that's just what pride is.

Perfect, actually! So, that I just do stuff, probably my ability to entertain myself, and that I refuse to let life feel like a race. I'm here for the journey.

a place you hope to visit in the future and why

Iceland! Iceland! At night! When I can finally see all the stars, and very importantly, it'll be that delicious shade of freezing, and SNOW! I miss biiig snows so much!! And I want to share it all with my best friend🥰💜💙🥂

an actor that gets on your nerves and why

Am I supposed to know names?

things you're excited about in the near future

Ooooh, you find out like this I'm a bit of fraud come next week. I have goals to put an ungodly amount of chilli in the puff pastries I'll make next week, mostly because I wanna see for myself how painful it can get😈 and, oh, a lot of very awkward and very hilarious dancing, but with how silly it is, it energizes me like nothing else. (And it's still leaps and bounds classier than the 1967 Far From the Madding Crowd adaptation of Troy's... fencing mating rituals. Why was I made to watch that with mine eyes🤣🤣)

least favorite ship in a fandom you're in

I'm in a fandom? Since when? Jokes aside, probably Tomoyo and Kurogane from CLAMP's Tsubasa Reservoir, because HELL NO. Tomoyo crushes hard on Sakura, and you just can't separate Kurogane from Fai. You can't. It'd cost him an arm and maybe a leg also this time.

what's the most toxic fandom you've been in

Oh no, I just make some tea and detox whenever it's the case. I am not a social person, so it helps

list three things you find beautiful about life

Hnnngh, getting to talk to someone in the wee hours of the night when it feels really special, the wind and how it'll numb my fingers but rekindle everything else in me, and how you can grow to love so many things you wouldn't even have thought about before. I love being surprised by time.

any dreams for the future

My personality is such that, from time to time, I just won't dare make a sound from fear they'll just slip through my fingers. I am taught to wait and see.

But this is the rest of the time, SO

I WANT TO KEEP WRITING FOR THE REST OF MY DAYS, AND NEVER FORGET THE THRILL AND JOY OF WATCHING MY STORIES DEVELOP BEYOND MY WILDEST IMAGINATION, OO-RAH!😍👏👏🤺

how are you feeling today

A bit like someone's stomped on my face (sleep; my fault, this time, but the lack of required hours keep me hostage), but also? Energized. Ready to go. And I absolutely never rest😈

These were really pleasant, so if anyone wants to hop on and grab some tea🍵, I'm keeping this tag open for you! I love talking😊

[adrift-in-thyme]

@thepinklink Plink you lovely human I come bearing Legend whump for you <33

I'm so glad you met and I've absolutely loved chatting with you these last few days! I look forward to many more conversations <3

Now, this fic kinda got out of hand (*stares at word count* I...did not expect it to get that long I promise), so I'm gonna hide it beneath the cut. But first, warnings!

CW for poisoning, vomiting, blood and injury, harm to animals, and some trafficking vibes (it's not trafficking specifically and isn't related to such harm to humans. But still, be careful)

Oh yeah and you can also read this on ao3

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Legend moves on feather-light feet. His cape swishes gently around him, its silken folds embracing his slight form. Not for the first time he thinks how lucky he is to have it. To possess the ability to become invisible is an invaluable skill. Especially, in situations like this one.

“Come on, rancher. I know you’re here.”

He steps around another row of empty crates, their metal bars dinged and scratched from previous occupants. He can feel their presence still lingering, calling out in panicked voices few humans can understand.

“Help us!” They cry and every word makes his ears prick up, listening even as he tries not to. “Set us free!”

Roughly, Legend swipes at his eyes. 

Find Twilight and get out of this cursed place — those are his only objectives. And the sooner he completes it, the better.

He tugs his cape closer about his throat and tightens his grip on his sword. Determinedly, he moves forward.

It seems like forever before the telltale sound of snuffling reaches his ears. Legend perks up, ears pricking at the noise. He can hardly pick out the rancher’s distinctive wolf scent through the stench of dozens of past captives. Still, this place has been empty up until now. Empty and horrid and dark.

So too have been the countless cages scattered about the wide space. But the one Legend can see now tucked awkwardly into a tight corner…that one is occupied.

A large, gray wolf is curled within it, ears drooping in defeat and blood on his paws. His breaths come fast, an edge of panic and pain hitching the end of every one.

Legend’s heart clenches despite himself. 

I’m coming, Twi. Just hold on.

Furtively, he glances around. No figures move in the shadows, no one steps into the dim light. But the goddesses only know how long he has before someone arrives. 

Legend takes a deep breath and rushes forward.

Twilight’s ears prick up at the sound of pattering feet. He raises his head, tired eyes searching for the disturbance. Fear quickly turns them razor-sharp. A growl rumbles in his throat, low and hoarse, but threatening all the same.

Quickly, Legend lowers his hood. He’s sure that a floating head isn’t the most reassuring thing in the world, but still, it’s better than nothing. And he is unwilling to remove his entire cape just yet. With luck, he can conceal Twilight beneath it as well. 

“Hey, hey quiet,” he hisses, holding up invisible hands. “You’re gonna alert the creeps.”

Twilight pauses in the act of rising to his feet, head cocked like one of the stable dogs in Wild’s Hyrule. Legend’s lips lift slightly. He reaches for the lock with one hand, retrieves a cluster of keys from his pouch with the other. 

He found them earlier, hanging on the wall from a hook. A paltry attempt at looking professional, in his opinion. Real villains conceal the keys in their cloaks or attach them to their souls with the darkest of magics, unreachable by any who lack the strength to defeat them.

He’s fortunate, though. Fortunate, that they weren’t smart enough to do either. 

“I’m gonna get you out of here,” he murmurs. 

Ring-adorned fingers slide over the collection of keys, magic rifling silently through them, searching for the one that fits the cage. It weaves with elegant grace between them, selects the right one, confidently raises it like a pointing finger. Legend grasps it and fits it into the lock.

The padlock plummets into his waiting palm.

“Alright, let’s get out of this place,” he breathes. And burn it down on the way out. “Can you walk?”

Twilight dips his head. Slowly, he limps out of the cage. A cold nose bumps against Legend’s cheek, leaving a smear of wetness there. The veteran swipes grumpily at it.

“Yeah, yeah you’re welcome. Now, let’s get out of here before somebody discovers us.”

Pulling his hood back over his head, he nudges the rancher into the safety of his cloak. Matted fur scrapes against his legs as they begin to walk. No doubt Twilight is leaving a trail of bloodied paw prints behind. But there’s nothing much Legend can do about that. Except, of course, pick up the pace.

At the rate they’re going, it’ll take them thirty minutes just to reach the double doors. By that time someone will have entered the room, noticed the marks, and begun a search. And though the cape is wonderful for concealing physical forms, it does little in the way of softening sounds.

Twilight stumbles, a low whine escaping before he can stop it. Something damp and clammy slides down Legend’s legs. The veteran reaches down and sets a hand on the rancher’s head.

“Hang on,” he whispers, and the wolf nudges him again in response.

Legend inhales deeply and blows it out. His eyes flit back and forth, searching for hidden adversaries. Every limping, laborious step brings them closer to their escape. Yet, it seems so far…

If he could lift the wolf, that would be helpful. One kick of his pegasus boots and they’d speed right on out of here. But Twilight isn’t light and Legend is already expending quite a lot of magic to keep them both hidden. 

Slow and steady is their only choice, then, he thinks, with a huffed sigh. Because it can just never be easy. 

If he’s lucky, though, it will be enough. 

But he is hardly the luckiest guy on earth. 

They have made little in the way of progress when a door slides open behind them. It glides softly on its hinges, showcasing a rather large grouping of shadows. They stretch along the floor in front of the two heroes. 

Legend stares down at them, heart in his throat. He dares not turn around to see who they belong to. Instead, he eases down into the shelter of a small enclosure of crates. 

Twilight lowers himself with a haggard sigh. But that terror still remains poignant in the piercing blues of his irises. And when he turns to peek at the doorway, his breathing speeds up.

What were those sadists planning to do to him? Legend wonders, fingers coming to rest in thick fur. He hopes it’s a reassuring gesture. What have they already done? 

“You said you had another test subject for me.” It’s a woman’s voice, sharp and calloused, like a hand that has held a weapon too many times. “Where is it?” 

“Right this way ma’am.” 

Large figures fumble to allow her a way forward. Legend tenses as the shadows grow darker, shorter. His fingers tighten, drawing a small comfort from the feel of his sword hilt in their grasp. 

The group approaches, passes by without even turning in his direction. He doesn’t allow himself a sigh of relief. They still haven’t reached the cage.

When they do, he knows it.

“He’s right — wait a minute! Where’d he go?”

Panic pitches gravelly voices higher.

“He was right here! I swear!”

“What you swore,” the woman hisses, “was that there would be a wolf waiting for me. A wolf with the power to turn into a man. 

“You swore to me that your price would be worth paying. Evidently, I trusted the wrong people.”

The room suddenly tenses, air thickening and growing sharp. Like a dagger readying to be thrown. 

Legend’s breath catches in his throat. Dark magic. He’s suffocating on it.

Somewhere, something makes a sickening squelch. A scream sends the pressure spiraling.

“No, n-no need for further violence! I can fix this, I swear!” 

The shadows darken once more. A man backs towards their spot, hands raised. 

“He’s here,” she says with icy decisiveness. “I can feel him.” 

The air goes taut again. She is closer than ever now, eagle’s eyes scanning for her prey. Twilight is rigid. Legend’s fingernails dig into his palm. 

“Them. I can feel them. There’s two of them now. Find them both, or suffer the same fate as your companion.”

Burly men the size of his uncle trip over themselves, sputtering promises and reassurances. They fan out, weapons in their hands. 

But the woman only grows closer. Legend can smell her now — rotting flesh and chu jelly and bokoblin innards, all attempting to hide beneath a layer of costly perfumes.

Legend presses a hand to his nose, fighting not to retch. Beside him, Twilight shudders.

“You’re near,” she purrs. Hands marred by too many magical experiments reach out, taloned nails beckoning. “I can smell your fear. Come out and I won’t hurt you.” 

Nearby, a stack of cages topple with a deafening crash. Legend flinches despite himself. Loud noises have always affected him strongly. Every one feels like an assault to his ears. But in this moment, with the tension and the terror, with a hundred different plans whirring in his mind, it feels like an explosion in his skull.

“Yes. I feel your despair as well.” 

She is even nearer now. Legend can see her hideous form, monstrous and gnarled and emanating dark power. Like a witch from the illustrated story books Uncle read him as a boy.

“Come out, little heroes. Come out.”

Legend inhales a shallow breath. He’s going to have to, at some point. She isn’t going to let up — that much is certain. 

But that doesn’t mean he can’t still try to evade her.

Closing his eyes, he sections off some of his magic. There is a separate path from the main one, one more violent, more…explosive. A simple nudge and eagerly, his magic streaks down it.

Legend nudges Twilight in the side. 

Get ready.

One second passes, then two more. Off to their left, crates and cages and men go flying in an eruption of crackling detonations. 

Legend works quickly, pouring more magic in, causing more explosions. They heat the air, send objects and people hurtling. Screams of pain and shouts of fear ring out.

The woman whirls for just a moment. And that’s enough. It has to be.

The veteran leaps to his feet. They can’t run — what Twilight achieves is more of a hobbling jog than anything else — but maybe, just maybe if they keep up this panicked pace they’ll have a chance…

Something streaks through the air, sharp and vicious, searching. It’s pure magic at first, a dark power he tries to evade, to shield them against. But his efforts only draw it to him further. It speeds up, ravenous and eager, zipping towards him. And the next thing he knows, a dagger is embedded in his bicep. 

Legend chokes on a sudden mouthful of blood. He tries to remain quiet, he tries. But the cry breaks free anyway, agonized and cut off, screamed through gritted teeth. 

Wrong, his body and mind screech as something horrible and icy slides off of the blade and into his veins. Wrong, dangerous, getitoutgetitoutgetitout

Trembling fingers reach for the hilt. But before he can drag it out another wave of magic hits. He screams, grip on his own spell loosening. He clambers to grasp it again, slips, falls. The cloak retreats into his pouch.

“There you are,” the woman hisses.

The ground bucks beneath his feet.

The desperate spark of hope that had blossomed in Legend’s chest shatters completely. And he falls along with it, colliding with the ground with skull-shattering force. 

Stars explode in his vision, bursting in eruptions of blinding, electric lights. Somewhere, past the roar filling his ears and head, past the thundering pound of his heart, Legend hears Twilight’s growl.

Nails clatter over the ground. Seconds later, a heavy object slams into the floor beside him, whimpers, and goes terribly limp.

Panic splits through the agony and confusion. Legend curls his hands into fists, blinking furiously in an attempt to see straight again.

Come on. Get up. Fight before they kill you both.

He grasps the dagger, yanks it out. His limbs scream as they move. Blood splatters onto the floor, creating large puddles of greenish-maroon. He tastes the tang of iron, the bite of bile, and…something else. It seems to emanate from him, a strange, vile thing. Tasteless, yet disgusting; icy, yet flaming hot. 

Legend shudders, suddenly nauseated. But he hefts his sword more firmly in his grip and turns to face the woman. 

“You are a strong one, boy,” she says, face splitting in a leering grin. “That dosage should have killed someone your size, instantly. Yet, here you are.” 

“What can I say?” The words are slurred. Legend stumbles as he steps forward, struggling to see past the blur the room is quickly becoming. “I’m full of surprises.”

He thinks the woman’s grin grows larger. But maybe that is only one of the illusions his eyes are forcing upon him. Either way, he hears her words quite clearly.

“I’m certain of it. Not to worry, though. You’ll be dead soon enough.” She nods to the men that have gathered around her. “Go. Get what is rightfully mine.”

They start forward. Legend grits his teeth and steps back toward where Twilight lies, still twitching from the effects of the spell that had hit him. 

“Just try and touch him,” Legend growls. “Know that spell that blew your friends sky high? There’s more where that came from.”

For a split second, there is the slightest glimmer of fear in their eyes. But then the ground dives down, down, down beneath his feet. Pain streaks through his head, as though someone has driven a stake through his skull.

Legend pitches forward and vomits.

Laughter assaults his ears as he fights to compose himself. Darkness tinges the edges of his vision. Oblivion beckons him. 

Let go, it whispers. It doesn’t hurt here. 

He bats it away, steels himself, straightens. Blood and bile dribble down his chin, and he doesn’t bother to wipe them away.

“Give up,” one man orders between barking chuckles. “You’re already dead.”

Legend lists to the side and grins, all sharp, blood-tinged teeth. 

“Not yet, I’m n-not.”

Magic streaks through constricted veins, scraping as it goes. With an agonized scream, he sends it forward. The room lights up with streaks of greenish light. 

He crumples in the wake of it, choking on a mouthful of blood, dragging thin gasps of air through failing lungs. His stomach heaves again, desperate to rid itself of the poison his heart pumps through him. But there is nothing for it to expel. 

Agony holds him in an iron-fisted grip, turning his limbs stiff and immovable, making his head spin and pound. The darkness claims more of his sight. Still, he battles it. 

He has to stay awake — for Twilight’s sake, for his own. He’s made it this far. He’ll be damned if he gives up now.

Cackles reach his ears. Slowly, he lifts his head.

The fallen bodies of his enemies lie strewn about, still smoldering. The sight brings bile back into his throat. He hates killing, no matter what the deceased people might have done. And yet, there had been no other choice. 

The woman, however, seems to have come out relatively unscathed. 

Shielding spell, Legend’s mind so helpfully supplies. A harsh curse bubbles out from between bloodied lips. 

“You truly are full of surprises, aren’t you?”

A bolt of electric power collides with his chest. Legend goes flying, hits a stack of crates, and collapses. His breath is merely a wheeze now, though he can’t tell if that’s from the poison or the broken bone currently skewering his lung. 

Both, probably. 

The woman advances. Legend tries to sit up and fails. His entire body is on fire now. Shudders wrack him. Everything smells of blood and vomit and poison. The room spins like a leever; his surroundings blur like smudged charcoal.

He coughs and more greenish-red hits the floor.

“I would keep you, you know. To examine and experiment on. But it seems the poison has already done irreversible damage.” 

A flick of a finger and Legend is propelled upwards. Seconds later, he hits the floor again with an earth-shattering crack. 

The pain of broken bones joins all else. He thinks he screams. He can’t be certain. 

He knows that he can’t breathe anymore. All his lungs are capable of are paltry, wheezing attempts. He’s suffocating, drowning in blood and poison. He’s back on the sea, battling against waves taller than Hyrule Castle, fear growing stronger with each one that floods the deck of his little boat.

“I see no reason to spend precious power on saving your life. Perhaps, you can save yourself. I doubt it though. After the spells you cast, you likely don’t have enough magic left within you to heal a nicked finger.”

She is right upon him now, presence smothering. Legend blinks, slowly. Everything feels very, very far away. If he releases his grip now, will he plummet? Or will everything simply fade away, leaving him to float on waves of grayish nothingness? Empty. Alone. 

Maybe it will feel better then, being unattached, emotionless. Maybe…maybe it won’t hurt so very much…

Fire screams in his veins, burning muscle and flesh and bone, devouring his insides. Blood fills his throat. His breath rattles in his veins. A tear slides down Legend’s cheek. Its icy touch is almost soothing. 

His grip on something resembling consciousness slips. He tries to inhale again. His lungs do not expand to fill his foggy request. 

The last thing he sees before his eyes flutter closed is a wolf leaping forward and closing its jaw around the woman’s neck.

She shrieks, blood spurts, and it all goes dark.

….

“...end! Legend!”

Protesting eyes flutter open, beckoned by a voice he knows. Sharp, gray-blue eyes gaze down at him from a pale face streaked with crimson. 

“Ra-ranch–”

Legend drags in a wheezing breath and chokes on the word. Twilight holds him closer, nudging his sweat-soaked bangs aside.

“Yeah, it’s me. I’m here.”

A calloused hand encases his frigid one. Legend tries to squeeze it. But his muscles won’t cooperate. Everything still burns. He yearns for the darkness to cover him again. He yearns to not feel.

Are you okay? Is what he means to say.

“Hurts,” is all that comes out.

Twilight’s expression shatters. There are tear streaks on his cheeks, the veteran realizes, dimly. They shouldn’t be there.

“I know, buddy.” The world shifts and Legend squeezes his eyes shut against it. Something cold and smooth presses to his lips. “Drink this. It’s all I’ve got but it’s enough to keep you alive.”

Bittersweet silk slides down his throat. Obediently, Legend swallows it. It soothes all the way down, knitting bones and flesh back together, nudging the wrongness out of his veins. 

Not completely. Not even close. But it’s something, and Legend is grateful for it.

“Okay?” Twilight asks, and the veteran offers a jerky nod. “Alright, then I’m gonna get you out of here.”

Again, his surroundings tip. Legend swallows against the urge to vomit.

“No,” he croaks in a barely audible whisper, “…I-I was ‘posed to get y-you outta here.”

The world begins to move like the endlessly churning walkways he had endured in the dungeons of Koholint. His head bumps against something wonderfully soft, and he leans into it. A heartbeat drums softly in his ears.

“‘M sorry.” 

It is merely a sigh. Twilight hears it anyway.

“It’s okay, vet,” he assures him, as thick darkness envelopes him again. “You did great. You saved me.

“Now, let me save you.”

Somewhere in the fuzz of oncoming unconsciousness and potion and pain, Legend has the urge to laugh.

Save him? He’s the veteran of hero business. He shouldn’t need saving.

But the heart keeps beating like a distant drum; and the softness drags him into it, tickling his nostrils and caressing his face; and the arms that hold him remain steady even as the world churns like waves on the sea. And before long Legend is gone, adrift once more in an abyss of blessed oblivion.

[damagedintellect]

Nakahara Chuuya x Reader

💌 Would this be considered a social suicide? : Chapter 2 💌  

Summary: You knew it was dangerous to take walks at night but hearing the water rushing under the bridge was calming to your nerves. You didn’t imagine you’d ever fall into the river and somehow wake up in your favorite anime. The isekai that I’m sure will come back to haunt me. It’s kept me up all night but I might as well get the brainrot out.

Notes: Reader is Isekai’d into BSD, Slow to start, Chuuya is endgame but there’s a fair bit of reader & Dazai moments too 

💌 Word count: 2,929 💌 Available Chapters [1] [You are here] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8]

The next morning you were woken up to a phone call. It was weird since the ringtone was not the one you were used to and the phone wasn’t placed where you normally put it by your side. You tried to keep your eyes closed, you were still tired. Eventually your hand found a flip phone and you picked up the call. 

“Yeah.” you sounded dead tired but sure enough Dazai’s chipper voice filled your ear. “And good morning to you~”

You groaned only half heartedly mumbling “It’s too early for this. Call Atsushi to get you out of the oil drum or whatever you got yourself stuck in. I’m going back to sleep.” You ended up slurring some of the words but you were on the precipice of falling back asleep.

“Wow, that's rude to say to someone who saved your life last night. I called you in good faith that my darling (Y/N) would help me with this emergency. Although that does leave me wondering, does your ability make you psychic?” That’s when the events from the night prior stirred you from your sleepy haze. Oh shit. You felt like you were dunked in cold water. Too much, you fucked up. Fix it. Lie. Lie like your life depends on it. What would Atsushi do? He’d panic and apologize right?

“OH GOD IT WASN’T A DREAM! I thought I was still dreaming. It was just a guess, I’m sorry Dazai I’ll-” you were cut off. Perfect.

“Calm down, I was only teasing you but you should come out once you’ve changed. Atsushi’s already downstairs waiting for you.” He ended the call swiftly after. 

That could have gone better but at least it wasn’t the worst thing having him think you had an ability. Maybe it was a good thing but still you didn’t like the casualness of it all. Dazai was one of your favorite characters that you knew way too much about. Naturally you don’t want to get on his bad side but you wanted to be kept close. Even though you feel like you can anticipate where he’s coming from, the fact of the matter is he’s supposed to be unpredictable. The problem is you want to be important but the man is a walking redflag and boy do you love flags. You already know romance was not an option especially with the way he flirts with women. He clearly doesn't have much interest in such a thing anyways. His idea that everything he desires will be taken from him always gets in the way of developing any deep meaningful relationship anyhow. Or at least was your guess based on what you’ve read. You feel like that’s the reason why he’s always annoying everyone all the time so in the event something were to happen to either them or himself he could continue without much worry. Especially since he wants to die without being a burden to anyone. You shift your focus to the clothes provided for you, a white button up shirt, pants and boots similar to Atsushi’s but instead of suspenders and a tie you were given a lightweight sweater vest to complete your look. You thought it was cute as you looked in the mirror on your way out the door.

You didn’t say much on the way through town, still embarrassed about how you spoke on the phone. Dazai spoke primarily about the job he would help get you both. Sometimes he would glance back at you just to make sure you were still listening. He even winked at you when he was talking about how good of a fit the two of you would be. The man had no right to be this attractive. As Dazai finished talking himself up Kunikida stormed in to set the record straight. 

Atsushi looked over to you “I’m starting to have second thoughts about accepting his help. Maybe I should just look for a job on my own.” 

“Eh, Dazai might seem like a moron but I’d trust him on this one. Think about it, you don’t exactly have the greatest credentials to get a job anyhow.” You shrugged, shoving your hands in your pockets. The reason you didn’t get much sleep last night is because you were dreading the next thing Kunikida was about to say. You're afraid you'll be absolutely useless.

“We have an emergency. A man has taken a hostage and threatened to blow up our office.”

Atsushi tried to protest but Dazai and Kunikida were not having it. You followed along without complaint, of course as was your plan from the beginning. If you’re being honest you forgot half of what Junichiro’s speech was about until you heard it right now. Like who was he talking to if not you guys hiding behind the decorative shrubbery. The office workers and hostage had been there for a while. Why wait till right now to say those things. Atsushi was still trying to whimper his way out of helping and Dazai was trying to coax him otherwise. You only nodded along.

“Then there’s only one option.” Dazai said taking a stance with Kunikida following suit. The game of rock, paper, scissors was short and the face Atsushi was making was priceless. Kunikida stood up and approached the “mad bomber” as calmly as he could. “Hey, easy does it kid.”

“Stay away, I only want to see the president! Don’t you try anything funny or I’ll blow this place to bits.”

Kunikida put his hands up slowly and backed away “Okay.”

“I know who you are. You’re Kunikida. You want me to lower my guard so that you can use that annoying ability of yours to stop me. Well that sure ain't happening. Lay on that desk on your hands and knees, and keep both feet above your head- ” as he continued on, you shook with laughter, suppressing the sound at the strange but clearly not well thought order. You saw Dazai side eye you and you whispered “Sorry I know this is bad but the request he was making, how would Kunikida, just never mind. This means you can’t go out there either, Dazai.”

“It would only make him more angry. Oh my whatever shall we do now?”

You both looked at Atsushi “Absolutely not.”

“I haven’t even said anything yet.”

“I already know what you’re gonna ask.” 

You sighed “Atsushi we are the only option.” Dazai nodded “You’re not a formal member and the bomber doesn’t know either of you at all.”

Before Dazai could move you were already rummaging through the boxes to grab newspapers. “Listen, you just need to distract him long enough for me to back you up. We got this alright?” you looked at Dazai for confirmation.

You took the words out of Dazai’s mouth but he just shrugged continuing the thought. “Yeah. How bout you put on an act. Make it depressing like you think you’re a real worthless human being. I know you can do it right?”

You handed Atsushi the newspapers but he still looked worried. Dazai dropped the smile whispering “Trust me, scuffles on this scale are child's play compared to what we normally deal with. You can handle this Atsushi.” He was quaking in his boots as he started his speech. Dazai looked at you and raised an eyebrow. You gave a pointed look at Kunikida “Since Atsushi looks around the same age as the guy it’s better for him to be the one to reason with him. Worst case scenario I’ll just run and throw myself on the bomb. I already don’t have any memories anyways” you don’t look at Dazai’s face you half expected him to make a double suicide offer. Atsushi got right in Junichiro’s face making the perfect opening for Kunikida. While everyone was distracted with relief you started to untie Naomi, ushering her to the other side of the room. By the time Dazai started messing with Kunikida you had already walked behind the desk ready to move the bomb to the far corner.

“Now you’ll pay. I swear anyone with supernatural powers is not totally right in the head.” Tanizaki declared pressing the detonator.

Once the bomb started ticking you were already in the corner. You turned crouching around the bomb “Thanks for last night, it was great we should do it again sometime!” You smiled fearlessly at Atsushi as he grabbed the bomb from your arms and pushed you away. Dazai caught you as you stumbled back. The bomb didn’t go off of course and you all stood around Atsushi. Dazai helped you to your feet asking if you were okay and you nodded.

“Geez you know I figured the kid was stupid but I didn’t expect them both to be suicidal.” Kunikida groaned while Dazai chimed “It seems I’m rubbing off on them. Wouldn’t you agree, Tanizaki?” The redhead peered around Kunikida’s side hesitantly “Sorry, are you okay?”

"Heee?"

You laughed at Atsushi’s confusion as it shifts to clear irritation. “I’m guessing that was the entrance exam?” you turned towards Dazai for confirmation as the president walked in.

“You’re exactly right.” Fukuzawa then explained the rest of the sentiment with Dazai’s plan to get you both into the agency. You leaned on the desk behind you waiting for Atsushi to come to terms with his decision. He was arguing with how violent the job is for him but you pointed out “Way too violent? I don’t think you can say that when you pried me off a bomb to protect everyone.”

He still needed more convincing but you stopped paying attention. Sitting in the closest chair you relaxed into the piece of furniture. Wasn’t your best but wasn’t your worst. Eventually you all went to the cafe downstairs. You got a hot chocolate not really being a fan of coffee and not feeling like tea. You were already tired but it was still only afternoon. You guys still had the whole day ahead of you. 

Junichiro was apologizing to you both but you told him not to sweat it. You made the claim that at some point you realized that he and Naomi were siblings. Naomi didn't even need to be prompted to start molesting her brother. As the siblings did their thing Kunikida came up to talk with you both about upholding the agency’s good name. Meanwhile Dazai was doing the exact opposite by flirting with the hostess. That’s when Atsushi asked what they did before working at the agency.

“Take a guess. It’s a game we play a lot here actually. Newcomer tries to guess his colleagues' former occupations. Think of it as part of training to be a private investigator.”

Atsushi looked at you before you added “I’ve been pretty good at guessing games so far. I'll take my guesses once you get stumped.” You folded your hands behind your head giving him the lead. He hummed “I want to say Junichiro and Naomi were students?” 

“Whoa you got it. Nice one.”

“How did you figure that one out?”

The siblings looked surprised but they really shouldn’t be. It was so obvious given their age and the fact that one of them was literally in a uniform. Why else would they only be part timers “Not half bad Atsushi. What about Mr. Kunikida?” The aforementioned blonde spat out his coffee. “Nobody cares about what I used to be alright!”

Atsushi tried to focus again “Hmm, an official? Did he have a government job?”

“Almost. What do you think (Y/N)?” Dazai gave you time to answer “It might be the glasses but “Mr. Kunikida” screams math teacher.” 

“I could totally picture that actually.” Atsushi responded flatly. Kunikida was grumbling “It was another life. I don’t even want to think about it.”

“What about me then?” Dazai perked up in his chair.

“What did you do?”

“Yup my job.” Dazai smiled knowing he would have no way of guessing. Atsushi went on a rampage trying to guess it. You just sipped your coco waiting. Debating if it was a good idea to frazzle the brunette by letting him know but you wanted to see his face. Kunikida huffed, betting he didn't actually have an occupation before this.

“Not true, I would never lie about something like this. You've given up right?”

Junichiro’s phone went off, drawing everyone’s attention to the call. It was work, Higuchi to be exact. Dazai tried to wrap it up "Let’s save the guessing game-"

"Actually I would like to take my shot in the dark if it's all the same to everyone else. I only need one guess to be right." You interjected immediately. You made up your mind. This was happening. It's about to go down.

Dazai perked up cheerily like he had been for the past few minutes as you leaned in between him and Kunikida. You cupped your hand around his ear whispering “The demon prodigy and ex- port mafia executive himself, Osamu Dazai.” When you pulled away he fiend ignorance and kept up his usual comical persona “Ding ding ding we have a winner! Now let's go meet with our client shall we.” He stood up and started ushering everyone upstairs shooing Kunikida when he tried to ask questions “Wait just like that! I wanna know.” Atsushi followed after. As you passed Dazai he put his hand on your shoulder. The weight was feather light to the touch but had a more threatening presence than a simple hand should have. Had you not thought about your answer the moment you woke here you might have been shaken but your resolve stayed firm. 

“What gave it away?” his voice was warm against your ear. You took a deep breath turning to stare at him and recited the line you practiced in your head. “Ability or not I can see it in your eyes.” you smiled before going after the others. That’s all you should say for now if you continue who knows what the consequences will be. You still had to come up with something to avoid being gunned down by Higuchi or worse killed by Akutagawa.

—

You decided that while Higuchi was leading you to the alley you would start idle chit chat. If you could convince her that you had an ability, maybe she'd feel threatened? That sounded stupid. You could just use Atsushi as a meat shield. You're not picky. "Ichiyo, do you perhaps have someone dear to you who has obscure coughing fits. I apologize if I'm being forward." You skipped alongside her fast pace. Her face shifted for a second. She never gave you her first name. "I do, it must be allergy season right?" You could almost feel the sweat drop at the possibility of the mission being compromised.

You shook your head "If their name is Ryunosuke I'm afraid it's a lung disease. My ability is random foresight but never wrong. It's not my place to say but you should make sure he gets it looked at." You smiled innocently as she was taken aback. Once you got to the threshold of the alley she announced your arrival ignoring your comment. You made sure to stand behind Atsushi knowing she wouldn't risk it. Until Akutagawa showed up, standing behind Atsushi was a good strategy.

As Akutagawa was about to attack you held up your hand and he paused, unsure if you were about to use an ability he didn’t know about. Since you were so new to the agency there wasn't any information about your level of skill. "I wouldn't do that if I were you, not unless you want to make Dazai very angry." He tensed at the mention of his former mentor. "Oh? And why is that?" He pointed a tendril to your neck drawing the slightest bit of blood.

"Because I'm the woman he's going to commit a double suicide with." You smirk knowing he wouldn't dare touch what "belongs" to Dazai. You wonder if he could hear that through the wire. Hopefully you were far enough away from Higuchi. "Very well. Don't get in the way and I'll spare your life." You backed away and watched the show. Junichiro struggled to look back at you making an attempt to glare. As subtle as you could you tried to give him a reassuring look that it was part of a plan and not you being scum. Technically you were being scum but he should cut you some slack. You weren't a fighter.

When Dazai was finished resolving the issue he bounced over to you. "So you're the woman who will commit suicide with me?" He marveled at you with a twinkle in his eyes and sarcasm on his tongue. "I mean you never actually asked but if I get to pick the cause of death, I don't see why not" You had planned for this too. On top of that you were surprised at how long it took for you to be in contention. You must look younger than you were or you could just not be his type. Who knows really when it comes to Dazai.

His eyes widened and you weren’t sure if he thought you were being serious or if he was just playing it up "Of course! What did you have in mind?"

You giggled "Old age." He didn't look amused. "Har Har. You're so proud of yourself aren't you?" He helped Naomi on to your back as he tried to figure out how to carry the boys. 

"Extremely."

<= Previous Chapter | Next Chapter =>

[queencherryberry]

So since everyone voted for Brothers best friend theme. Here it is.

Summary: reader is Randy’s younger sister and she has a crush on his best friend Cody. She just doesn’t know it yet. Reader also experiments as it’s her last year of high school.

Warnings: lots of weed and alcohol usage; mostly weed, eventual smut, swearing, kinks, Matt Riddle, tough love(brother x sister dynamic cause Randy’s a hard ass), lots of partying before college, teasing, pet names

Main pairing is reader and Cody Rhodes

Brothers Best Friend Ch. 1

Your head pounded as you slowly opened your eyes to the burning sunlight that was coming through the window behind you. You groaned not wanting to be awake. ‘How much did I drink?’ You thought to yourself as you pulled the blanket over your head not paying attention to your surroundings. You jumped felling a pair of arms pull your exposed back to the owner’s bare chest. You listened to the soft snoring of the other person before you slowly looked behind you to see who it was. Your jaw about dropped when you saw who it was in bed with you. You then suddenly realized that both of you were naked. “Randel is going to kill me and him.” You whispered under your breath in shock. “Not if we don’t tell him.” The voice groggily answered. You looked back again at the guy behind you and was met with bright blue piercing eyes that were struggling to stay open. “Did we…? When did we…? Oh god how drunk were we?” You started and panic in your voice.

“Relax. Let me take a shower and drink some coffee and I’ll explain everything to the best of my ability.” Cody said rubbing your arm and then groaned sitting up. “Anything you think we did, we didn’t. You literally threw up everywhere and on both of us. I was just too lazy to put my shorts on. And frankly too drunk. Did you want a shower too?” He explained and threw you one of his shirts seeing your embarrassment to being naked in front of him. He himself put on a pair of shorts to make you more comfortable. You pulled the shirt on quickly. You opened your mouth to ask a question and he answered it before you could even ask it. “Your clothes should be in the dryer. Now answer my question. Shower or no? Or do I need to go first?”

You stared blankly at him and then nodded your head. “Right. I’ll take first shower. Coffee doesn’t sound too bad right now. You got an extra pair of pants or shorts..” he cut you off by throwing a pair of short at you.

You turned off the shower handle and dried off. You found your clothes neatly folded on the counter top sink. You got dressed and dried your hair to the best of your ability feeling your hair get frizzy already. You walked out of Cody’s bathroom and followed the smell of scrambled eggs and bacon and….waffles? This man had your heart and you guys weren’t even dating. At least you didn’t think you were. Things could’ve changed last night when you were shit-faced drunk. After all you did wake up naked in your brothers best friend’s bed. Naked. And now he was making you a 4-star breakfast with coffee. How he was single you didn’t understand.

After breakfast you sat on Cody’s bed flipping through his Hulu, Netflix, any streaming service he had. You settled on The Seven Deadly Sins while Cody himself took his shower and got dressed. Your phone buzzing pulled your attention from the anime and you answered your phone. “WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU? I'VE BEEN CALLING YOU FOR THE PAST 2 HOURS YOU BITCH!” Great. Randal. And he’s pissed. “I-I think I’m at Cody’s?” You replied sheepishly. “Thank god. I thought you were dead somewhere in a ditch. I got concerned when your school called me and said you weren’t there today. Is Codes busy at the moment?” Your brother asked. “He’s in the shower. I’m just watching anime.” You answered back. “Did he touch you?” Randy got right to it. “No. I woke up this morning and he was sleeping on his beanbag chair. Not gonna lie, it looked more comfortable than his bed.” You lied not wanting to anger your brother further. “Can I hang out here for the day? I don’t feel good and I have a throbbing hangover.” You asked picking at your nails. Randy sighed on the other end of the phone. “Yeah. Matt wants to smoke so me and him might come over. What’s Rhodes got for snacks and munchies?” He asked. “Depends. Are we smoking Matt’s stash or yours?” Weed. Just what you needed to get rid of your hangover. “Matt’s. His is top shelf. 95% THC. Guaranteed to rid you of your hangover. I don’t know where the dude gets his shit, but it’s strong as hell.” Randy rambled on. You paused the show and got up to head back to the kitchen to scout for what your brother asked. “Looks like he’s got shit for munchies and shit. Might need to make a stop before coming over.”

After his shower Cody threw on a cut off shirt and his shorts. He found you cuddled in his bed watching tv. “You ok darling? You’ve been quiet all morning?” He walked over to the other side of his bed and grabbed something out of his bedside table and took a deep hit off the object. Your eyes went wide. “Since when do you vape? What flavor is it? Oh and Randal and Matthew are coming over in about 2 hours. Give or take.” You informed him. Cody grabbed the bottle of juice and read the flavor. “Pennywise. It’s a fruit cocktail of sorts.” Cody sat down beside you and took another hit off his vape. You looked over at him asking silent permission to take a hit. He handed you his mod and watched you take a hit. “Mmmm. Yummy.” You smiled. You turned your attention back to the anime in front of the both of you. Ten minutes later you found yourself yawning and stretching suddenly feeling tired. Cody had already lightly passed out the same way you were about to. Something in you couldn’t help urge to want to cuddle so you laid down and slowly inched towards him wanting to feel warm. That man was like a human body heater. He reached out groggily and pulled you close letting your head rest against his chest. Soon you dozed off to the sound of his heart beating and the warmth radiating from him. Out of habit like you’d do to your body pillow back at home, you put on leg over his to get comfortable. He instinctively draped an arm over her side and rested it on her back.

About an hour into their nap Cody woke to the sound of knocking on his door. You were on your side sound asleep with your head on your chest. His phone beeped indicating he had a message. He looked at it and it was Randy. “Come in.” Cody answered groggily. He mentally prepared himself for the load of shit Randy would give him for cuddling y/n. “Hands were I can see them Starshine. My sister better be decent and not sucking your dick or some shit.” Randy said walking into Cody’s room. He stopped for a moment seeing you sound asleep on Cody’s chest as Cody attempted to put both hands up but you were laying on his one arm. Cody craned his head to look at Randy to make sure he looked like a friend and not a foe. “Sorry Randy, would you have liked her in reverse cowgirl instead?” Cody joked as Randy stared daggers at him. “Bro… sick house. You could totally throw a party here.” Matt said following in behind Randy. Matt was carrying his usual stoner stash with him. “Where we smoking bro?” Matt asked not paying attention to the scene in front of him. “Basement.” Cody replied sitting up and bringing you with him. Cody slightly shook you awake. “Rise and shine bitch. You’re not sleeping all day. It’s damn near noon. You’re not gonna be a lazy fuck today. Here, I brought you your comfy sweats and a hoodie. Your fuzzy blanket is in my car. Cause god forbid you go anywhere without ‘blanky’.” Your brother mocked as he tossed the clothes at you and his keys. Your face went red with embarrassment at the mention of your comfort blanket. Cody stood up and stretched his arm that had fallen asleep.

Tags: @alyyaanna @sunnyfleur23 @jazzy-tzw @racerchix21 @claymorexpunisher @theswitchbladessweetheart

[littlekoifishes]

can you do meggy and desti agere headcanons for me, bestie? [i never seen a desti agere headcanon before and i think it would be really interesting if one was made] but you no have to do it, no pressure!! :3

Oh heck yah!!!

Little desti and flip! meggy headcanons!!!

Little desti:

5-7 little age, very much a big kid regressor and has a lot of fun running around and yelling happily out loud.

She does throw a mean tantrum when she doesn't get what she wants.

She is a great prankster in her own eyes, putting whoopsie cushions or scarying people just running around hiding before popping out saying boo!

Very playful regressor and just wants to have fun. She uses sidewalk chalk a lot to draw hopscotch and to draw flowers, etc.

She has splatguns made for little kids, nothing compared to her main splatgun, but she adores it and often shoots meggy for fun during playdates.

She isn't a pacifier user, she uses sippy cups and blankies. She has a red velvet blanket she takes everywhere it's her calm down blanket.

She had a white and brown spotted dog as ur comfort stuffed animal and a crow plushie she has when she plays pirates.

She is very creative and often times plays pretend if she's not intrecating with her caregiver or friends.

Very much needs to take naps. She gets very fussy if not given naps at the hour. Oftentimes, she will just slump over when little and fall asleep whenever exhausted.

She is a big kid meal eater, mashed potatoes are her favorite, she loves egg salad sandwiches or pbnj, chips and salad she is a big salad fanatic.

She does stomping from time to time whenever upset, but stops when told to at least 3 times.

Queen of the playground loves the playground runs around the entire thing 4 times before going down slide, monkey bars, and digging for treasure in the sand box.

I do think her eyes get really big when regressed and are a big sign that she is small. Also, she'll very much get her voice more whiny before she even noticed.

She wears big kid clothing like t shirts and pants, mostly just shorts and tank tops. But for bedtime, she does regress to 5 and often wears onesie or matching pajama sets.

Switch meggy (caregiver)

Meggy is her 2nd caregiver.

She plays with desti shooting child sized guns paint guns at her or playing hide n seek with her.

She makes sure desti gets her naps in and has seen all with destis tantrums and finds them all adorable but very annoying at times when it drags on.

Not at all a stern caregiver, but she does get very bossy when desti gets grumpy with her.

She is pretty much like a big sister to desti and keeps her happy.

She buys new jammies and outfits for desti at random and buys her a good amount of toys.

She throws a sick birthday party for her little one just whole thing with a cake and all her friends.

She has a lot of fun doing desti hair, putting them in pigtails,buns,ponytails, brushing it down and out, etc. She adores her hair and loves being able to do it she thinks she looks so pretty.

Running around with her on her back giving piggyback rides.

Is the reason why desti eats her greens because she can not cook to save her life without help and will opt to make salad than to make other hard meals.

Neat freak at times but gets desti involved to learn to pick up her toys etc.

( Little meggy headcanons ):

5-8 year old little

Big kid and older sister to desti when 8 years old and little sister to desti when younger than her.

Very playful and giggly, playing tag and running in puddles and mud with desti.

Picking up rocks and seashells at the beach and playing in the sand, making sandcastles. (They can not play in the water.)

Often when older helps desti put on coats and jackets and does her hair to her best ability and desti always loves the charms and hair lips pins she puts in her hair.

Big sticker user her entire face would be covered in stickers if it wasn't for desti taking then off her face out of panic.

Very messy regressor often get hurt while little by accident and needing bandages.

She likes soft foods a lot and eats mashed potatoes and smoothie bowls a lot.

Candy eating loves showing her tongue that is green or blue from candy. Has a treat jar because of good behavior.

Angst headcanon//

Meggy would regressor more when desti did die in canon and would become very emotional when regressed.

Getting very emotional and upset when little hearing destis name or seeing her toys or blankie or stuffed animals.

Oftentimes, the day she died, she died, crying when little to desti, saying she missed her sister.

And when in caregiver space have very bad empty nest syndrome and feel overly upset that she doesn't have a little.

She would often take 4 when regressed to caregiver or mario to caregive for when she is ij caregiver space like this. They both don't mind at all but it did scare them a few time when she did this.

Alrighty that's it chat!! X3 hope you enjoy!!!

[lulu2992]

I’ve previously talked about the moment John nods and smiles at the Deputy in the church during The Atonement but, honestly, I think this entire scene is awesome. So many things are happening, there are a lot of details to notice, and the actors and animators really did a great job.

So here’s a breakdown of the cutscene and a highlight of my favorite moments (under a cut because there are 25 GIFs).

1. First, there’s John’s genuinely surprised reaction to the Deputy grabbing his arm. He quickly regains his composure, but he really jumps when the Deputy moves.

2. Then, there’s his joy when he’s done tattooing the Deputy. You can see how proud and happy he is to do something he believes is right and helpful.

3. Look at how theatrically and confidently John, who knows he’s in control of the situation and in a position of strength, turns around. He’s done talking to the Deputy personally and he’s now giving a performance. In contrast, in the background, Mary May and Nick’s fists are clenched; they’re clearly tense and angry. I also like how good the cultist on the right is at handing the book to John, who barely needs to stop when he takes it as if everything is precisely choreographed.

4. Jerome’s defiance vs John’s impatience.

5. John is so dramatically annoyed.

6. When Jerome falls, Nick and Mary May try to help and catch him. Unfortunately, a cultist is holding Nick’s left arm, so he can’t do much.

7. It seems John has so much faith in his followers’ ability to protect him that he’s totally unimpressed by Mary May’s attempt at attacking him.

8. And that’s when Jerome switches the books.

9. John laughs… but he’s clearly not amused.

10. I love that he breathes a sigh of relief when Jerome finally cooperates.

11. The reactions to Nick’s “Fuck this”. Jerome’s face is saying, “Oh no, you shouldn’t have done this”, the cultist holding him at gunpoint didn’t expect that, and John just keeps unblinkingly looking at Nick…

12. …until he snaps. At this point, the two men are ready to come to blows. Thankfully, another cultist arrives to hold Nick back while the one in the background looks a bit unsettled. John, his fists tightly clenched, manages to calm down quite quickly. He’s still angry, but at least he doesn’t look like he wants to punch Nick anymore.

13. The way John talks with his hands.

14. Nick has just spit in his face and John is now visibly upset. He’s planning his revenge, and Jerome knows something bad is about to happen.

15. When John is done whispering in Nick’s ear, the cultist behind him holsters her gun. She is close enough to have heard what John said and she seems confident that Nick is going to stop resisting.

16. She even nods. Meanwhile, Nick is distressed and looks at his friends. To me, his eyes are saying, “Guys, I’m so sorry… I don’t want to do this, and please don’t judge me, but I have no choice.”

17. I like how John and the cultist who gives him the scalpel don’t even need to look at each other. How many times have they done this? You can also see Jerome is starting to panic as he understands what’s next. The other cultist might be smiling, I’m not sure… If she is, it’s probably because she’s happy Nick has finally “seen the light”.

18. As soon as John is done cutting out Nick’s tattoo, one of the cultists bandages his wound.

19. Again, we can see how well-organized the ceremony is and how efficient John’s “assistants” are. When he needs the stapler, it’s here for him to grab. When he’s done using it, the cultist is there to take it from him. Again, he barely looks at her; he trusts all of them.

20. Meanwhile, Jerome is in shock.

21. Judging by the cultist and John’s reaction, making someone Atone is pretty intense. They look exhausted, and also exalted because they see this as a holy thing.

22. While John is busy washing his hands, Jerome discreetly taps his Bible to remind the Deputy that a gun is hidden inside.

23. The intensity of John’s stare.

24. He totally agrees with Mary May when she tells the Deputy to “just say yes”.

25. And of course, I had to include the face John makes when he believes the Deputy is finally about to give him what he expects.

This cutscene is intense and sometimes hard to watch, but I think it’s also one of the best in the game. I love it.

[just-a-dinosaur-i-guess]

character ask: teruko and sigma

teruko first!!

first impression:

ohhh you're murderous

impression now:

the gorl!! i think she is so cool and her ability is made very interesting bc of how she uses it :)

favorite moment:

when she kills fukuchi in the anime. the va did SO well and i nearly cried too. also her fight with sigma was fun to watch

idea for a story:

i have this one i've barely expanded on in my wip pile where she panics really bad on a mission, turns into a baby, and the other hunting dogs have to take care of her. also a vague concept exploring her being the captain of the hunting dogs after fukuchi dies + another in my vaguely set-up post doa arc that my fukurotsu fic hinted at where ranpo takes teruko out to solve a case together. fun violence ensues

unpopular opinion:

i think she's smarter and more calculated then people act like she is

favorite relationship:

i don't ship her with anyone, but oughh her dynamic with fukuchi makes me SO curious.. i wanna see more, i wanna know how she got recruited canonically!!!

favorite headcanon:

AUTISTIC

sigma's turn <3

first impression:

oh you're pathetic

impression now:

oh you deserve that nice house in the woods and nobody to bother you ever again

favorite moment:

hmm.. i like when we get to see how good of a manager he is. also i like this manga panel

idea for a story:

honestly the only one i have is a tachisig fic where he learns metalworking to make gifts for tachihara . they have sigma's dream house there it's just very sweet

unpopular opinion:

there's a post i saw that says it better then me but i think people use them as a prop for other characters way too much. also the three year old jokes have gotten very tiring at this point

favorite relationship:

sigma's relationship to the rest of the doa intrigues me more then anything we actually see in canon tbh. but i like him and nikolai's dynamic and i'd love to see how they interact how that fyodor's dead

also canonically i don't think i really ship him with anyone

favorite headcanon:

space hyperfixation

[redheadspark]

Circus- Random Title fic thing idk what this is bahaha

A/N: YES STELLA! I HAD to write a little list about it instead of a few things!

Snow White

So...Melody using her ability has become a literal circus at their Oregon Home

Clío and Druig would find birds flying their home constantly, not thinking about it at first since birds were reasonably common at their coastal home

But waking up one early Saturday morning to a hoard of wildlife at their front door was not what they expected.

Rabbits, chipmunks, squirrels, moles, deer, foxes, and even a pair of bears were on their front lawn, sitting amongst one another and enjoying each other's company.

It felt like the circus was on their front lawn on an early Saturday morning.

After the shock disappeared, Druig and Clío knew the culprit. Druig looked at the stairway behind him and inhaled deeply.

"Melody Sersi! Did you summon the entire forest to our front lawn?!" He yelled up the stairs.

A pause was heard, then Melody tentatively answered at the top of the stairs, "Yes?"

"Oh dear," Clío hummed.

Since then, there were ground rules for wildlife near the house: Melody had to use the meadow behind the house if she wanted to interact with any of the animals, she had to be in eye and ear sight with at least one parent, and no animals were allowed within 6 feet of the home because of the boys still being a pinch too small.

Also, Druig didn't want any animals eating out of the vegetable garden he worked so hard on for the past year.

Melody took those rules to heart, making sure she was only using the meadow behind their home for a little bit of time. Druig and Clío would see her tend to the smaller creatures with ease, including baby rabbits and birds with their chicks.

Clío had a moment of panic when a bear and her cub were with Melody in the meadow. But after watching for a split second, Clío realized that the mother bear was napping while Melody was playing with the baby bear, who was cooing at Melody and wrestling gently with her.

"You weren't scared of that bear, Petal?" Clío asked Melody later that night as she was tucking her in bed.

"No, momma! The mommy bear was really nice and that was her only baby! She needed to take a nap and I told her I would play with her baby while she took a nap, just like what Da does when you need a nap!" Melody replied happily, Clío giggling as she kissed her goodnight.

When the Eternal family would come to visit, they were both surprised and impressed with Melody and her charm on the local animals.

"So why is her nickname Snow White again?" Sprite had to ask as she came to visit one week in the Spring. Clío and Druig eyed each other and then pointed to the back window in the kitchen. Sprite looked, seeing her niece talking to a small deer family and the baby deer nuzzling against her hand. Sprite's eyes went wide.

"Holy Shit!"

"Hey! Langauge in front of your nephews!"

Thena loved seeing Melody use her ability, looking at her niece with pride as Melody would tend to some of the smaller creatures.

"A true warrior tends to those who are vulnerable," Thena told her once as they sat together on the porch to watch the sunset over the ocean, "You loved those animals with everything in you, little one. They'll love you in return,"

"This is the coolest thing ever!" Jack would say in glee as he sat with Finn and Melody while some squirrels and chipmunks would crawl all over them and in their laps. Phastos would watch with a hint of nervousness, though he trusted his niece with her powers.

"Jack, you're taking a bath tonight after playing with those little rodents!"

"Aww, Dad!"

Kingo would park his car a bit farther away so the birds would damage his rental car.

"Please don't ruin the exotic rental!"

"You're fault for getting the expensive rental out here in rural Oregon!"

"Oh shut it, Makkari!"

But Druig and Clío saw one heartfelt moment with their youngest child Oliver. Being the quieter twin and more on the meek side, Oliver was more of an observer and watcher on the sidelines. But he loved seeing Melody interact and play with the animals, wishing to go out there himself and see it first hand. Yet he was afraid, too timid to take the leap.

"Come on, Oli. Don't be afraid!" Melody explained as she pointed to the large family of rabbits playing together in the meadow, "They're really nice, I told them all about you! Here, take my hand," Melody laced her fingers with her brother's hand, looking at her parents for permission.

Druig nodded, knowing Melody wouldn't let anything happen to Oliver. Clío watched with a hint of hesitance as her daughter lead her little brother to the small meadow, where a little of rabbits were jumping and frolicking through the high wildflowers and bushes.

They both sat down together and immediately a few rabbits came to Meldoy and right into their lap.

At first, Oliver was scared and nervous. But the smallest rabbit hopped into his lap and nibbled on his shirt, Oliver giggled and shrieked in laughter.

Clío and Druig never thought they would have a Disney Princess as a daughter, let alone Snow White herself

@a-lumos-in-the-nox @basicrese @virtueassassin @heartofwritiing @botanicalbarnes @ethereal-athalia @heliosphere8

[patchdotexe]

ok heck it uhhh stickmolus

(this is still one of my fav drawings for it. the guuuyyyys)

it is! a Henry Stickmin au! taking place in our Limoliverse setting, which is the catch-all name for.. several stories we haven't made any content of except character designs and incoherent tumblr posts. um. hm. WELL the part that matters is that everybody is aliens!

it's a very loose adaption of the whole series, except with the twist being that henry is jumping between routes willy-nilly and potentially even creating brand new ones as he goes thanks to breaking things in unexpected ways. you know how it is with spaghetti. also there's a lot of background worldbuilding that we are very bad at actually implementing

(also it has an askblog! @stickmolus is in a weird limbo state on account of the exhaustion and my difficulty to keep up an ongoing interactive project, but its fun to read and i still think about picking it back up. i want to so bad. i am my own worst enemy)

quick hits:

Henry is.. something! nobody knows what his species is, including himself. he just straight up spawned one day and immediately began doing crime. this immediately got the attention of the CCC, especially once he started pulling out every power and item out of his back pocket and launching between timelines at random.

everyone's response to him is some form of panic on account of him being an Unauthorized Fucking Thing. speaks english but also writes in minecraft galactic and can make nether portal noises. he's not mute but there's a pretty big language barrier he's trying to work around and when he is able to talk to people he's pretty sparse with words. his head is weirdly shaped and i admire max's ability to actually Make A Whole Ass Sculpture Of This Guy oh my god i just looked over at my shelf and got emotional

i did animation memes with all 3 of triple threat and henry's is RENARD!

Charles is a pilot for the Limolian military and is certified in both air and space travel! good for him. he's a limolus, which is kinda the "mascot species" for the setting seeing as its. named after them. they've got your basic run-of-the-mill psychic powers tropes and are heavily inspired by Giegue from the Mother series! i could talk about them for a very long time. LET'S TALK ABOUT CHARLES.

charles was stationed on earth for a while and as a result is considered kinda Weird because he picked up a lot of earth culture stuff. he's fluent in both english and lilio so he's henry's translator, although his translation is pretty loose and skips details and basically he is not reliable no matter how hard he tries. i love him

his animation meme is BAM BAM! and it was really really fun to make. i love drawing charles i love thinking abt charles he is My Boy

ELLIE oh my god this drawing doesnt have her tattoos. what the hell. ellie is ALSO a limolus! they can be colours besides red its just that ellie and charles are both red. anyway. she's very good at telekinesis because canon ellie already uses the force, so that's her solution to most problems. her relationship with henry is a bit rockier from the get-go due to a communication barrier on Several Levels, but theyre able to get along! ..in some routes. oops.

uhhhh she's actually got some pretty intense backstory that hasnt come up yet because Ellie Has Not Appeared On The Blog At All for the love of god why did i pick the order i did its gonna be FOREVER until we see ellie AUGH. but she got locked up in the wall for some Pretty Serious Crimes (like uh. treason?) and even in timelines where she joins up with charles there's some friction because of that.

her animation meme is Wolf in Frenzy which is probably the best one ive made so far ngl

Reginald's anatomy is terrible and i hate drawing him. also he's a musae, which are very long/tall and very venomous. the toppats overall are a ragtag group of people of various species and various backgrounds, in stark contrast to the govt which is like 90% limoli. also he's a pathetic noodle of a man but that doesn't stop him from being a tricky bastard

i didn't animate him but he shows up in RENARD for like 5 seconds if that counts

uuhhhh also i have a "#stickmolus au" tag. which is probably pretty incoherent. im tired

[thetorturedmusesdept]

Was that [ELIZABETH GILLIES]? Oh no no, that was just [MEGARA], a [CANON CHARACTER] from [DISNEY’S HERCULES]. They are [TWENTY-SEVEN] years old, use [SHE/HER], and [ARE NOT] aware that they are not actually from Washington DC. Too bad they can’t stray from this city for long.

FULL NAME: Megara Chloros AGE: 27 SPECIES: Human FANDOM: Disney’s Hercules GENDER IDENTITY: Cis female; she/her SEXUALITY:  Bisexual NATIONALITY:  Greek ETHNICITY: White HOW LONG HAS YOUR CHARACTER BEEN HERE?: Three Weeks JOB: Personal Assistant WHERE HAS YOUR CHARACTER BEEN PULLED FROM IN THEIR FANDOM?: The end of the movie, after Hercules saves her from death and renounces being a God to be with her. She doesn't remember any of this right now though. HAS ANY MAGIC AFFECTED YOUR CHARACTER?: Yes, Meg currently believes she's been in DC all her life, with memories of home replaced with Washington.

FACE CLAIM: Elizabeth Gillies SPECIAL / RECOGNIZABLE FEATURES: Striking blue eyes. HAIR COLOR: Dark brown EYE COLOR: Blue ACCENT: American

SIBLING(S): Menoeceus, Lycomedes, Haemon, and Pyrrha PARTNER(S): None atm. CHILDREN: None atm. PARENT(S): Creon and Eurydice

- Megara is terrified of heights. She does not do well with being up high at all. She gets extreme anxiety and has even gotten sick from the stress before. There isn't much that scares Meg, but heights is definitely one of them. - In the past, Meg used to be a romantic. (tw: death) She had a boyfriend whom she loved dearly, so much so that when he passed away, she sold her soul to Hades just to bring him back to life. The asshole wound up leaving her for another woman, ruining Megara's ability to trust as well as her faith in love. She's cynical and jaded now, swearing off love and romance altogether. -Meg is a fan of theatre. She enjoys seeing live plays. She'd never admit it, but she's also fond of a good musical. Her favorite is Wicked, particularly the song No Good Deed. - Back in her school days, Meg was on the cheerleading squad as well as in the Glee Club. As such she's pretty agile and athletic, as well as a talented singer. She thinks about singing full-time occasionally, but views it as a silly dream. - Meg is very fond of nicknames. She enjoys giving people nicknames, she kind of views it as a way to stay casual with someone. So it's safe to say, if she uses your real name, it's most likely because she is being serious or feels close to you. - Purple is Meg's favorite color. She's also a gold girly. So you'll see her sporting purple and gold quite often, and her home has quite a lot of those colors as well. - She knows it's sort of silly, but Meg likes flowers. She likes making floral arrangements and she enjoys getting flowers as a gift. She usually keeps fresh flowers in a vase on her kitchen table. Her favorite flower is a lily. - Meg is not much of a pet person. She doesn't mind animals, and has no real opinion when it comes to cats vs dogs, she just doesn't have the desire to care for an animal. She prefers her solitude.

platonic connections: Friends, please. Meg has never really had good friends. She could definitely use a good, strong, platonic connection. more platonic connections: Anyone from Hercules, but especially Hades! Hercules would be nice too, and I think Pain and Panic or The Muses would also be a ton of fun! gym buddies: Meg works out a few times a week, so a gym buddy would be nice. fwb/hook-ups: Since Megara is a philophobe (fear of love,) she's definitely more prone to just hooking up. Not to say something can't build off of that, of course. Her trust issues just make it hard to connect sometimes.

[random-doctor-on-the-internet]

First of all, you called me a maggot. I'm sad. I'm the epitome of sadness right now. I'm the second saddest being in the world (the first one being the goldfish that just understood the inexorable marching of time that is slowly leading us towards an inevitable death). Still love you, but you'll have to read a long and boring story to make up for it.

Good luck reading

The Noodle Story

puts on sunglasses, preparing to write the most tortured thing ever

It all started on a summer night, in Italy. I loved Italy, it was the only country in which I had a proper house, and the garden was amazing. My dad liked gardening, and he just recreated Eden, with various tropical species, including the unicorn plant (we call it like that, here). It was one of the rarest and most special flowers in the garden, and it was absolutely lovely. Well, apparently it smelled like trash but I never noticed.

So, anyways, I was sitting in the garden, and eating noodles in candlelight near this plant. That was a calm corner where people weren’t, ‘cause of the, you know, smell. We had a visit that day, and I wanted to escape from the strangers.

So, I was eating, when I heard an astounding humdrum. Crumpling of leaves. Shouts. Squeals. Was it the sound of a sword being drawn? Oh, and, of course, the recognizable "clap clap" of Lou Boutin (Google them if you don't know what it is) shoes on the moss. Thinking that this might be another stupid concubine who wanted to admire the peacocks and did not understand the principle of a paved path in the middle of the garden (that happens way more often than you think), I prepared to nuke the enemy with my Hermione-like speech. Make them regret everything that they did in their life. Oh, dear, I was not ready for what was going to happen.

First came the pigs. We had cute piglets in our garden, my uncle loved them and no one went against my uncle's will. (For your information, we didn't keep them for food. They were pets. And we never grab and eat animals. Mostly because I'm vegetarian.)

They rushed into the clearing where the sacred plant was enthroned, gathering behind me, as if I were a warrior angel charged to protect them. Or perhaps it was just the noodles' smell?

Anyways, I was standing here, near a massive plant, a bowl of noodles in my hand and a small army of scared piglets behind me, wondering what I had done to god, when a kid entered the scene. A running kid, dressed like the cursed child of a ninja warrior and a scarecrow. Also, they were holding a knife in their hand, with obviously not good intentions. Did I mention the knife was pointed at me?

I freaked out. Thought of using my fighting techniques. Remembered that I had the physical ability of a Jell-o. Decided to do a surprise effect, and fell on the moss like a crepe. Noodles flew away. The piglets had long left the scene when nobody was paying attention.

The kid didn't see that one coming, and just crashed on the ground, flipping the table ( on which my candle was) off. The candle fell on the bowl of noodles. That shit's fucking flammable. Want to overthrow the government? Atomic bombs are too expensive? Just throw a bowl of noodles and set it on fire, you'll get the same effect.

Anyways, we panic. Try to stop the fire from attacking the plant, and succeed after a long and tiring battle. Unfortunately, it was impossible to save my dinner.

-The End-

And that's how I met my best friend. They'll probably come back in the next Bedtime Story for little mafiosi.

Hope you (didn't) like it. I won't read it again to fix it before posting, even if it's trash.

Not A Maggot.

Hey does tumblr have an Official Plant because if not I have a submission to make, a very strong contender for this site!

May I present to you the genus: Amorphophallus.

Yes, Amorpho-phallus, literally Greek for the 'shapeless penis' plant.

It's the tallest flower in the world! The magnificent Shapeless Penis, dwarfing grown-ass adults with a flower that grows up to 8.2 feet, is a sight to behold.

It's also called the corpse flower, or corpse bride flower, because this beauty has "a strong odour of rotting human flesh". We love that here on tumblr.

Edit: Just found out that it is also known as the Devil's Tongue and Voodoo Lily or Voodoo Plant. So. Do with that what you will.

The root of some of these Amorphophallic beauties is edible (I've seen them lurking creepily at grocery stores, the grocer usually grabs an axe and slams it into the root to split it and sell a part). This root is known as the elephant foot yam, which is fitting, because it is large, malformed, and disturbingly hairy.

Idk a plant named shapeless penis that has an eight foot flower that smells like rotting human flesh and a hairy edible root that can grow heavier than a toddler seems very on brand for tumblr.

Here you go:

@queermarzipan thank you for inspiring this by teaching me about bell peppers.

[golden-travelers]

For you, My Lord~

Role-Swap SAGAU, Imposter AU, (Creator! Ajax x Acolyte! GN Reader)

TW: Cult behaviors, Yandere, Platonic Yandere, Blood, Gore, Injuries, and etc. You have been warned

(Childe is so ooc like omg, why did I even write this💀😭 also if you wanted to be tag please just comment on what fics you want to be tag)

Even he wasn't sure how it came to this. All he ever wanted was to meet his favorite characters in the game, not to branded a 'so called imposter' and for the characters ruthlessly hunt him down like an animal.

He is hiding in the cold mountains of dragonspine. He was tired, hungry, hurt(physically, mentally and emotionally) and injured of running away from the angry characters, camping with the hilichurls that was oddly docile to him and even gave him food and shelter from the endless winter (sadly they just sloppily bandage his injuries).

For the first time, Ajax felt safe in teyvat, that was until he saw you in all of your glory, the fatui sigil attached at the side of your belt, same goes to your hydro vision (just think of what pyro skirmisher wears that's your clothes but change the red to navy blue, and you don't wear a mask and the hat) with your signature polearm in your hand, looking at him with wide eye.

~~~~~~

When he first started playing genshin, it was the same time of releasing of your character banner, he enjoys how you fight, your skill and your burst in the character trial, him being a rich ass he is, top up in the game to get you and your weapon (he got lucky on your weapon banner only doing 50 pulls and got 2 of your signature weapon in a single ten pull) you were his first 5 star, he enjoyed playing you, being a polearm hydro user you are, he enjoys everything you did in game, he loves the way you talk, your voice, your idle animation, everything! So he kept pulling for you, he only had you c3 with your weapon c2 after your banner ended. You were his main dps of the team (only taking you out when doing oceanid, even though he can build you phys), You had the best artifacts, you were his first triple crowned character, he loved everything about you and sometimes wish that he could met you in real life.

~~~~~~

Well, one of his wishes did come true, meeting you personally but he knows that his life would be ended by you. Fear rushed through his veins and acceptance was all he felt, he knows he is never getting out alive with you finally hunting him down. 'Why does it have to be me?' he thought closing his eyes, accepting his fate.

"Your lordship...?" You softly ask to him, his eyes suddenly snaps at you, in disbelief that you didn't murder him immediately, y-your not going to kill him? He thought, still trying to process on what you said.

"Oh my Heavens! Your lordship!" You yelled in panic as you saw his injuries. You quickly rushed to his side, your weapon dropped to the ground as you use your hydro abilities to heal him. The hilichurls thankfully knows that your not a threat to his lordship, which they let you pass to them without resorting to a fight.

"Y-your not going to kill me...?" He quietly said as you look at him in horror. "K-kill you?! Why would I ever kill you?! Let alone hurt you?! Your our lord! Your our god! You are the divine creator! Killing you is the most greatest sins to have ever committed in teyvat! W-who did this to you, Milord?! I shall hunt them down and bring you justice!" You said angrily, he knows it's not directed to him but he can't help but flinch. You saw this and lowered your tone down.

"N-no don't hunt them down... I fear that they will hurt you too... I don't want them to hurt you..." You barely heard what he whispered to you, so merciful, your still full of rage that you can't hunt the sinners down but you obeyed nonetheless because he is your creator. You then gently pick him up, making sure your not touching his now healed wounds. He was a bit startled by the sudden lift but he let you do what you want.

"If you allow me, my lord, may I take you to snezhnaya? You will be protected there, by me and the tsaritsa, I will assure you, my lord." You ask for his permission to bring him to the tsaritsa, you will do everything and anything the creator tells you to do, even though your loyal to the tsaritsa, your more loyal to him as he is the beloved creator.

"Ok... But can I ask you something?" He softly ask as you continue to walk away from dragonspine, while also being careful to be not seen by the other acolytes.

"Of course anything, milord."

"Anything?"

"For you, My lord."

"Then please call me, Ajax... I'm not fond with honorifics" Ajax quietly whispered, sure he may come from a rich family and the maids and butler call him young master, but he still like being called by his name, he's still human(kinda) you know.

"Of course, Ajax."

And for the first time ever since he came here, he smiled genuinely, as he slowly fell asleep in your arms.

Might make a part 2 again

Tag: @nicebonescomrade

[chocolatemilksmoothie]

Labyrinth Runners

Omg I loved this one!! buckle up, there's a lot of little details and a lot to point out

I suspected we might not get an update on Luz and the rest of the owl house members and the suspense there is killing me ngl...

I can already see it, both groups meet and both are like "we have SO much to tell you you're not gonna believe this-"

anyways, baby Willow and baby Gus my beloveds

I love their relationship. they were there for each other before anyone else was, and you can see how deeply they care for one another

Gus is a scary good illusionist, it must be frightening to have that happen

ahh good ol' breathing exercises, always worth a shot

I ADORE that Bump allows more kids to try multi track magic, and Matt got into illusion magic! aww

Among Luz's messages was "don't scare him(them?) away" I think she was referring to Hunter. it's sweet she took the time to write that, but god I hope she's safe

the hearts they are adorable <3

I enjoyed Willow and Amity's plot as well! Amity trying to protect her because he values having her back vs Willow wanting her to see that she is strong and can fight alongside her!

he's been reading about Grimwalkers... oh buddy what have you learned?

it's both sweet and heartbreaking that 1) he thought of hexside as a safe place to hide and 2) he's wearing the Flyer Derby outfit. he really had a good time being a normal kid for a day :')

Adrian. I like his style but I did NOT buy his act. How horrifying that he was tricking students into getting sigils by pretending he was helping them not get sigils. messed up

they really made him a pretentious director. I love it. both he and Terra are scary and full of personality, very fun antagonists to see

Love his design also. Everything about it

Severine... is voiced by Dana right? she was hilarious, go back to the tiny cat coven girl they don't deserve u here

Loved the concept of a trippy labyrinth of familiar places too

throw yourself down the steps to see if they're real, flawless technique

once again Hunter parallels another character. Gus is trusting by nature, which has led to him getting hurt, while Hunter grew up in a competitive, hostile environment where the only person he trusted blindly ended up being a monster. He is being extra cautious. But Gus won't hurt him

God, Belos sent a search party and is pretending like he's all worried. he hasn't told anyone he ran away. but we know what'll happen if he goes back to the castle *shudders*

the acting and animation for the panic attack, the breathing and the hesitation were done with a lot of care. I also like that it's in "Gus' room"

I love Gus I love him lots ok

the banned posters I love my children lmao

HIGH FIVE

I'm so happy Hunter still calls Willow "captain" he respects her a ton

and again, it makes sense he noticed she wasn't the real one. Gus is trusting, and Willow has never taken advantage of his trust, while Hunter is super on edge atm

"put him-" "out of his misery? got it" jesus dude he just kicked you

HIS TEAMMATES SAVED HIM

"dude looks sickly" yeah he's been sleep deprived and mentally abused and probably not eating much it'll do that to ya

oh I love this little ragtag team of rebel witches (+ Gus of course)

Adrien wants to find the Galderstones for Belos. Funny, pretty sure that's an ingredient for a certain thing hmmm ever heard of Grimwalkers?

"in the name of the moon we will kick your ass!"

Gus' ability to make you see traumatic memories is messed up. Dana stop traumatizing the children challenge

Hunter and Gus bonding about how they've been deceived and used. and awww the breathing with whistling ahaha is this because of the tooth gap because same

GUS KEPT THE MIRROR THINGY YES

"what... is... this??" "just go with it" my heart

friends will hug you even if you haven't showered

the Illusion coven head got MESSED UP oh my god

Barcus cracks me up he's so well spoken

and we end with Hunter having a LOT to talk about, but also having a large group of people to support and watch out for him

I suspect they're all gonna start preparing to find Luz and the others and to stop Belos in the Day of Unity ohhhohoho I feel DREAD BABEYYY

this was a dense one, and the first episode without Luz in it. I expect next week we'll catch up with them, especially King, and hopefully by the end of next ep both teams meet up to prepare together...