#not just about the nb person

[naomiknight-17]

Told my brother I was sad about the nonbinary member of government in Mexico getting killed and he was like "Well, it may not have been about the fact they were nonbinary, the cartels kill members of government down there all the time"

And like, yes, I guess? But I am still sad that a member of my community fucking died. I am sad that someone outside the acceptable gender box made it to a government position and then was killed. No matter the reason

But I didn't know how to explain that to him. I am already too sad today

[spitblaze]

gnc and butch women (cis AND trans) and transmascs are punished for performing masculinity past certain thresholds of arbitrary attractiveness because people that cishet society categorizes or clocks as 'women' are not supposed to perform masculinity. hope this helps 👍

[yourlocalgrass]

Wait your telling me that Lesson 40 Nightbringer was MC, back in the timeline, the brothers welcoming us like we came back from what, shopping? Who don’t even know what friggin happened, like their memory was wiped or something…?

Bro I would have ripped everything apart after everything the MC went through, I mean I would be left traumatised. So now we’re gonna act like nothing happened?? We didn’t even get a glance at Nightbringer either.

At the very least it definitely felt lacking

There’s no way. People who still love the NB story and tell people to stop placing criticism in hard working devs and writers, do you still place your trust in Solmare?

[smokbeast]

Seeing allot of trans stuff lately. I don't do this but obviously trans people and all people of LGBTQ+ are welcome here!! If you are a terf or sick mf I will stomp on you till you die you are not welcome here.

Also merlot, frak and soma are trans! Allot of my ocs are of the queer skellies and my goobies alike so hehe :]

[alluralater]

like yes i am a woman and i identify as a woman but what even is a woman? is it femininity? not necessarily. is it masculinity? not necessarily. is it both in a way? yeah kinda but really who knows. all i know is that i like a good grilled cheese every now and then and i like fucking yummy sluts. if my vagina became useless to me tomorrow i’d still be identifying as a woman so like. is that what being a woman is to me?? grilled cheese and lesbian activity?? maybe that’s exactly what it is?? gender is so strange because it isn’t actually real and it’s a construct, but i am affected by it societally so it must be thought about. i’m THINKING. i THUNK. i have a headache now

[moiraimyths]

Before we call anon rude because let’s see it from their perspective, imagine getting an entire feast to eat. That can be pretty hard to start with so much that’s going on, but if they start with one thing they know they’ll like (aka one character they like) that can be the start for them leaping to other characters to finish the story and the bigger story. I struggle the same way to start book series if I don’t have at least one character that drives me to read it, it’s all about what can be the hook to push them through. Sounds like the anon is neurodivergent (just a guess) so they might genuinely not see it as rude and see it as a solution to even play the game to start with.

Btw absolutely adore the game, the complex and rich characters making them all so unique is amazing. The art is so pleasing to the eyes I love it!! I’m waiting for it all to get out at once so I don’t get too impatient. Shae however interests me the most, which routes will have the most lore for them? Will there be routes that give more lore in general based on decisions you make or do they all share the same amount? (I mean general lore not just Shae lore)

Apologies; we are not trying to accuse any asker of being rude! We are simply explaining our perspective as the developers / are trying to broadly encourage folks to dip their toes into other areas of the story outside of the main route(s) they're interested in, especially considering some routes will be made available sooner than others, and these other routes will likely contain additional scenes/lore of everyone's fave(s) regardless! We want to give each main cast member an equal amount of love (and lore) regardless of their overall popularity, so our goal is not to tut-tut anyone for having strong preferences for one character over the others, but rather to explain that you may be surprised by how much *more* you learn about your preferred characters in the other routes. That's all!

For Shae... Well, they were a foot soldier for one of the worst periods of the War. Lore wise, any other story that touches on the War will likely have content relevant to them and their experiences. ^^

[transgenderprototype]

Ill go onto someone's profile and their pinned post will have like "DNI IF YOU SUPPORT [insert artist] ILL BLOCK YOUR ASS IF YOU REBLOG THEIR ART anyway u can dm me if you want more info on why i have a vitriolic hatred for this person, i pwomise it wont be biased and full of bullshit :3"

Ill be like "okay thats fucking stupid, im not dm'ing them for what'll clearly be a biased response. I should probably look more into it.

I find out why.

"Oh these are lies. These are lies being spread because someone leaked a queer person's nsfw alt and found something they could twist into being "morally wrong" and theyre still continuing as the artist clarifies that what they drew isnt [whatever theyre trying to twist it into]."

[yuridovewing]

i understand the frustration with “i made this gay pairing cis x trans so they can still have biological babies” with no thought to other methods and how ppl assume thats the case when it comes to mothpool aus where mothwing is also the mother of the three, but also…. idk i kinda dont give a shit if someone wants to do that and i dont really think its inherently transphobic as long as its handled with care and respect.

what really concerns me about this debate is how some people are adamant that you cannot portray trans people having biological children in media or youre being disrespectful. and im gonna say as a nonbinary person who doesnt want children for themself- thats kinda fucking weird? like i understand that for some people, theyre trans themselves and theyre speaking from a place of dysphoria, and i absolutely get that, which is why i think the topic should be handled with nuance and diversity in trans characters, but like…. guys. pregnant trans men exist irl. trans women get people pregnant irl. trans ppl’s ability and right to parent and have biological children are being debated irl. we get denied the opportunity to adopt as well.

in a climate like this, are we SURE we want the stance on rewrites and headcanons in the silly cat books to be “if you portray trans characters having children, especially with a gay couple, youre a transphobic freak no matter what!” does it really matter? especially if its being done by a trans person handling the topic with nuance who has a lot of trans characters with varying perspectives?

obviously yes, remember that thats not the only way certain gay couples can have kids, remember that not every trans person is fully comfortable with it and keep that in mind, remember that surrogacy and adoption are also perfectly valid ways to give fan babies- but remember that there are OPTIONS. not that you need to condemn the idea of transgender parents in the first place unless they fit the very specific criteria of “proper transgender representation” and anything that dares deviate from that is proof the op is a transphobic monster (bonus points if theyre a trans creator bc i mostly see trans people getting shit for this and it kinda pisses me off. although idm if cis people do it either as long as theyre handling it with respect)

[pharawee]

I'm so happy we finally got more of a backstory and a happy ending for Namsom and Kor in City of Stars, even if some of the flashbacks were super painful to watch.

There's this part when that horrible, hateful aunt is being intentionally cruel and transphobic, and I think the translator did a really good job of substituting cultural differences and a lack of gendered pronouns by having the aunt intentionally misgender Namsom:

Still, I don't think the subs quite manage to bring across how incredibly rude and hurtful and transphobic (and homophobic too btw) she really is.

Because in Thailand/Theravada Buddhism sons often ordain for a few weeks or months to honour their parents/family. This isn't expected of daughters. See where this is going?*

(*That being said, some conservative temples/monasteries might not want trans or queer people in general to ordain either because they view queerness as a distraction and/or a bad karma.)

Then there's this bit where the English subs again intentionally use the wrong pronouns but in the Thai original the horrible aunt calls Namsom a slur (tut/ตุ๊ด - which afaik is used for [effeminate] men only) along with kathoey (กะเทย - which is NOT a slur, even if that horrible woman meant it that way) - making it very clear what exactly she thinks of her.

And later, when Namsom tells Kor that she is kathoey (and negl that scene almost broke my heart for so many different reasons 😭), she shows him her ID card.*

Currently there is no way for trans folk in Thailand to change their legal sex, meaning that whenever they have to show any kind of ID (which afaik happens quite often in professional environments) they automatically out themselves. The marriage equality bill that's currently underway will hopefully change that soon. 🙏

(*This was also a plot point in My Ride when one of the moto-taxi drivers discovered that his crush was trans when he found her purse - and he didn't care either. 🥰)

[warper-in-training]

he didn't even bat an eye I feel so insulted he should've reacted with shock not the smiling ourple sticker

[thottybrucewayne]

No, real question. How you a transmed and nonbinary?

[screambirdscreaming]

I used to like saying "gender is a social construct," but I stopped saying that because people didn't tend to react well - they thought that I was saying gender wasn't real, or didn't matter, or could be safely ignored without consequences. Which has always baffled me a bit as an interpretation, honestly, because many things are social constructs - like money, school, and the police - and they certainly have profound effects on your life whether or not you believe in them. And they sure don't go away if you ignore them.

Anyway. What I've taken to saying instead is, "gender is a cultural practice." This gives more of a sense of respect for the significance gender holds to many people. And it also opens the door to another couple layers of analysis.

Gender is cultural. It is not globally or historically homogeneous. It shifts over time, develops differently in different communities, and can be influenced by cross-cultural contact. Like many, many aspects of culture, the current status of gender is dramatically influenced by colonialism. Colonial gender norms are shaped by the hierarchical structure of imperialist society, and enforced onto colonized cultures as part of the project of imperial cultural hedgemony.

Gender is practiced. What constitutes a gender includes affects and behaviors, jobs or areas of work, skillsets, clothing, collective and individual practices of gender affiliation and affirmation. Any or all of these things, in any combination, depending on the gender, the culture, and the practitioner.

Gender encompasses shared cultural archetypes. These can include specific figures - gods and goddesses, mythic or fictional characters, etc - or they can be more abstract or general. The Wise Woman, Robin Hood, the Dyke, the Working Man, the Plucky Heroine, the Effete Gay Man, etc etc. The range of archetypes does not circumscribe a given gender, that is, they're not all there is to gender. But they provide frameworks and reference points by which people relate to gender. They may be guides for ways to inhabit or practice a gender. They may be stereotypes through which the gendered behavior of others is viewed.

Gender as a framework can be changed. Because it is created collectively, by shared acknowledgement and enforcement by members of society. Various movements have made significant shifts in how gender is structured at various times and places. The impact of these shifts has been widely variable - for example, depending on what city I'm in, even within my (fairly culturally homogeneous) home country, the way I am gendered and reacted to changes dramatically. Looping back to point one, we often speak of gender in very broad terms that obscure significant variability which exists on many scales.

Gender is structured recursively. This can be seen in the archetypes mentioned above, which range from extremely general (say, the Mother) to highly specific (the PTA Soccer Mom). Even people who claim to acknowledge only two genders will have many concepts of gendered-ways-of-being within each of them, which they may view and react to VERY differently.

Gender is experienced as an external cultural force. It cannot be opted out of, any more than living in a society can be opted out of. Regardless of the internal experience of gender, the external experience is also present. Operating within the shared cultural understanding of gender, one can aim to express a certain practice of gender - to make legible to other people how it is you interface with gender. This is always somewhat of a two-way process of communication. Other people may or may not perceive what you're going for - and they may or may not respect it. They may try to bring your expressed gender into alignment with a gender they know, or they might parcel you off into your own little box.

Gender is normative. Within the structure of the "cultural mainstream," there are allowable ways to practice gender. Any gendered behavior is considered relative to these standards. What behavior is allowed, rewarded, punished, or shunned is determined relative to what is gender normative for your perceived gender. Failure to have a clearly perceivable gender is also, generally, punished. So is having a perceivable gender which is in itself not normative.

Gender is taught by a combination of narratives, punishments, and encouragements. This teaching process is directed most strongly towards children but continues throughout adulthood. Practice of normatively-gendered behaviors and alignment with 'appropriate' archetypes is affirmed, encouraged, and rewarded. Likewise 'other'- gendered behavior and affinity to archetypes is scolded, punished, or shunned. This teaching process is inherently coercive, as social acceptance/rejection is a powerful force. However it can't be likened to programming, everyone experiences and reacts to it differently. Also, this process teaches the cultural roles and practices of both (normative) genders, even as it attempts to force conformity to only one.

Gender regulates access to certain levers of social power. This one is complicated by the fact that access to levers of social power is also affected by *many* other things, most notably race, class, and citizenship. I am not going to attempt to describe this in any general terms, I'm not equipped for that. I'll give a few examples to explain what I'm talking about though. (1) In a social situation, a man is able to imply authority, which is implicitly backed by his ability to intimidate by yelling, looming, or threatening physical violence. How much authority he is perceived to have in response to this display is a function of his race and class. It is also modified by how strongly he appears to conform to a masculine ideal. Whether or not he will receive social backlash for this behavior (as a separate consideration to how effective it will be) is again a function of race/class/other forms of social standing. (2) In a social situation, a woman is able to invoke moral judgment, and attempt to modify the behavior of others by shame. The strength of her perceived moral authority depends not just on her conformity to ideal womanhood, but especially on if she can invoke certain archetypes - such as an Innocent, a Mother, or better yet a Grandmother. Whether her moral authority is considered a relevant consideration to influence the behavior of others (vs whether she will be belittled or ignored) strongly depends on her relative social standing to those she is addressing, on basis of gender/race/class/other.

[Again, these examples are *not* meant to be exhaustive, nor to pass judgment on employing any social power in any situation. Only to illustrate what "gendered access to social power" might mean. And to illustrate that types of power are not uniform and may play out according to complex factors.]

Gender is not based in physical traits, but physical traits are ascribed gendered value. Earlier, I described gender as practiced, citing almost entirely things a person can do or change. And I firmly believe this is the core of gender as it exists culturally - and not just aspirationally. After the moment when a gender is "assigned" based on infant physical characteristics, they are raised into that gender regardless of the physical traits they go on to develop (in most circumstances, and unless/until they denounce that gender.) The range of physical traits like height, facial shape, body hair, ability to put on muscle mass - is distributed so that there is complete overlap between the range of possible traits for people assigned male and people assigned female. Much is made of slight trends in things that are "more common" for one binary sex or the other, but it's statistically quite minor once you get over selection bias. However, these traits are ascribed gendered connotations, often extremely strongly so. As such, the experience of presented and perceived gender is strongly effected by physical traits. The practice of gender therefore naturally expands to include modification of physical traits. Meanwhile, the social movements to change how gender is constructed can include pushing to decrease or change the gendered association of physical traits - although this does not seem to consistently be a priority.

Gender roles are related to the hypothetical ability to bear children, but more obliquely than is often claimed. It is popular to say that the types of work considered feminine derive from things it is possible to do while pregnant or tending small children. However, research on the broader span of human history does not hold this up. It may be true of the cultures that gave immediate rise to the colonial gender roles we are familiar with - secondary to the fact that childcare was designated as women's work. (Which it does not have to be, even a nursing infant doesn't need to be with the person who feeds it 24 hours a day.) More directly, gender roles have been influenced by structures of social control aiming for reproductive control. In the direct precursors of colonial society, attempts to track paternal lineage led to extreme degrees of social control over women, which we still see reflected in normative gender today. Many struggles for women's liberation have attempted to push back these forms of social control. It is my firm opinion that any attempt to re-emphasize childbearing as a touchstone of womanhood is frankly sick. We are at a time where solidarity in struggle for gender liberation, and for reproductive rights, is crucial. We need to cast off shackles of control in both fights. Trying to tie childbearing back to womanhood hobbles both fights and demeans us all.

Gender is baked deeply enough into our culture that it is unlikely to ever go away. Many people feel strongly about the practice of gender, in one way or another, and would not want it to. However we have the power to change how gender is structured and enforced. We can push open the doors of what is allowable, and reduce the pain of social punishment and isolation. We can dismantle another of the tools of colonial hedgemony and social control. We can change the culture!

[yourlocalgrass]

Nightbringer lesson 48 Spoilers:

—————————————————

Ok hear me out. I feel like the entire Simeon turning into a demon this season… almost feels like a retcon of S4.

Basically… all the things that should have happened in S4 were brought into NB S3.

Luke finally wanting to stand his ground while talking instead of running out of Purgatory Hall as a tantrum, and releasing he shouldn’t have to wait for Simeon to tell him because it only makes both sides feel worse as they both bottle their emotions, Lucifer and his development in sharing his concerns with the ones close to him and not dealing everything by himself, also let his brothers tag along with him and let them in on finding out as well, (totally in contrast to S4 it was such a mess) Raphael during the locked lesson and more about his feelings on losing everyone close to him so hopefully we’ll see more of this in the next lesson or more, and compared to the last season where Mammon was screaming about Simeon becoming a human as a way of voicing his frustrations blaming it on anything even Michael etc, he was more mature (as it should have been in S4 as well because he isn’t dumb) knowing nothing could be changed and it isn’t anyone’s fault and just felt melancholy and quiet knowing shouting or confronting in frustration won’t do anything for Simeon.

At first I was annoyed of the Simeon becoming a demon plot, but if they actually put effort into it I’ll see I guess… still skeptical and they’ll probably ruin it later just like they usually do.

Honestly all of this would have been better if it was incorporated into Season 4 and this plot didn’t exist.

[despazito]

ngl the way some folks online go on about m/f presenting relationships being icky and gross does kind of really tire me out as a bisexual

[akkivee]

there was some display gallery showing off the various logos in hypmic and the ichikuu peeps on the tl were in shambles over both of them using halos in their mc name signatures lol

[frnkiebby]

that gorgeous fucking profile~🎃