#normal things to do and experience
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#the chrysalis forms Inside the bug and then like... splits it open and the caterpillar's now empty skin just shrivels like a rolled sock#so like... whoever discovers howdy's chrysalis would have to deal with seeing his scooped-out body
You are killing me, This is both the best and worst mental image, Thank you!
you're Welcome!!
#it Is pretty terrible huh lmao#do you want another terrible mental image? For Free?#please picture frank deciding - for research purposes - to take the 'shell' home#and either pinning it to a wall for Observation or laying it out like a bear rug#howdy stops by franks and has to confront his past self's corpse cushioning the dining room table#normal things to do and experience#frank doesnt understand whats wrong with it. like. what else were they gonna do with the body. put it in a box??#at least he's finding a use for it smh#rambles from the bog#yassified howdy <3#also i was doing some more Chrysalis Reading#and saw it described as 'the caterpillars old body dies inside the chrysalis'#so howdy essentially dies and is resurrected.#basically what im saying is he's puppet jesus-
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the thing is that they're so fascinated by sex, they love sex, they can't imagine a world without sex - they need sex to sell things, they need sex to be part of their personality, they need sex to prove their power - but they hate sex. they are disgusted by it.
sex is the only thing that holds their attention, and it is also the thing that can never be discussed directly.
you can't tell a child the normal names for parts of their body, that's sexual in nature, because the body isn't a body, it's a vessel of sex. it doesn't matter that it's been proven in studies (over and over) that kids need to know the names of their genitals; that they internalize sexual shame at a very young age and know it's 'dirty' to have a body; that it overwhelmingly protects children for them to have the correct words to communicate with. what matters is that they're sexual organs. what matters is that it freaks them out to think about kids having body parts - which only exist in the context of sex.
it's gross to talk about a period or how to check for cancer in a testicle or breast. that is nasty, illicit. there will be no pain meds for harsh medical procedures, just because they feature a cervix.
but they will put out an ad of you scantily-clad. you will sell their cars for them, because you have abs, a body. you will drip sex. you will ooze it, like a goo. like you were put on this planet to secrete wealth into their open palms.
they will hit you with that same palm. it will be disgusting that you like leather or leashes, but they will put their movie characters in leather and latex. it will be wrong of you to want sexual freedom, but they will mark their success in the number of people they bed.
they will crow that it's inappropriate for children so there will be no lessons on how to properly apply a condom, even to teens. it's teaching them the wrong things. no lessons on the diversity of sexual organ growth, none on how to obtain consent properly, none on how to recognize when you feel unsafe in your body. if you are a teenager, you have probably already been sexualized at some point in your life. you will have seen someone also-your-age who is splashed across a tv screen or a magazine or married to someone three times your age. you will watch people pull their hair into pigtails so they look like you. so that they can be sexy because of youth. one of the most common pornography searches involves newly-18 young women. girls. the words "barely legal," a hiss of glass sand over your skin.
barely legal. there are bills in place that will not allow people to feel safe in their own bodies. there are people working so hard to punish any person for having sex in a way that isn't god-fearing and submissive. heteronormative. the sex has to be at their feet, on your knees, your eyes wet. when was the first time you saw another person crying in pornography and thought - okay but for real. she looks super unhappy. later, when you are unhappy, you will close your eyes and ignore the feeling and act the role you have been taught to keep playing. they will punish the sex workers, remove the places they can practice their trade safely. they will then make casual jokes about how they sexually harass their nanny.
and they love sex but they hate that you're having sex. you need to have their ornamental, perfunctory, dispassionate sex. so you can't kiss your girlfriend in the bible belt because it is gross to have sex with someone of the same gender. so you can't get your tubes tied in new england because you might change your mind. so you can't admit you were sexually assaulted because real men don't get hurt, you should be grateful. you cannot handle your own body, you cannot handle the risks involved, let other people decide that for you. you aren't ready yet.
but they need you to have sex because you need to have kids. at 15, you are old enough to parent. you are not old enough to hear the word fuck too many times on television.
they are horrified by sex and they never stop talking about it, thinking about it, making everything unnecessarily preverted. the saying - a thief thinks everyone steals. they stand up at their podiums and they look out at the crowd and they sign a bill into place that makes sexwork even more unsafe and they stand up and smile and sign a bill that makes gender-affirming care illegal and they get up and they shrug their shoulders and write don't say gay and they get up, and they make the world about sex, but this horrible, plastic vision of it that they have. this wretched, emotionless thing that holds so much weight it's staggering. they put their whole spine behind it and they push and they say it's normal!
this horrible world they live in. disgusted and also obsessed.
#this shifts gender so much bc it actually affects everyone#yes it's a gendered phenomenon. i have written a LOT about how different genders experience it. that's for a different post.#writeblr#ps my comments about seeing someone cry -- this is not to shame any person#and on this blog we support workers.#at the same time it's a really hard experience to see someone that looks like you. clearly in agony. and have them forced to keep going.#when you're young it doesn't necessarily look like acting. it looks scary. and that's what this is about - the fact that teens#have likely already been exposed to that definition of things. because the internet exists#and without the context of healthy education. THAT is the image burned into their minds about what it looks like.#it's also just one of those personal nuanced biases -#at 19 i thought it was normal to be in pain. to cry. to not-like-it. that it should be perfunctory.#it was what i had seen.#and it didn't help that my religious upbringing was like . 'yeah that's what you get for premarital. but also for the reference#we do think you should never actually enjoy it lol'#so like the point im making is that ppl get exposed to that stuff without the context of something more tender#and assume .... 'oh. so it's fine i am not enjoying myself'. and i know they do because I DID.#he was my first boyfriend. how was i supposed to know any different#i didn't even have the mental wherewithal to realize im a lesbian . like THAT used to suffering.
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um ok cool thanks for letting me know .... why are you telling me this
#yeah so on todays episode of guys who cant communicate their affections normally :#THIS IS THE ONLY WAY I CAN DESCRIBE IT. I WANT TO EXPAND AND I WILL MAYBE. BUT THIS COMIC IS HOW THEY ARE IN MY HEAD#I CANT EXPLAIN IT IN ANY OTHER WAY OTHER THAN SHITPOSTS#for some reason i cant stop making shitposts that i take 100% seriously and put alot of thought into but cant say it in any other#form than a stupid shitpost#im hoping. praying that someone gets this#WHATEVER. YOULL GET IT WHEN I DO THE DAMN THING I WAS MEANT TO BE WORKING ON WHEN I WAS DOING THIS#OH ALSO I EXPERIMENTED WITH SCARS ON LAIOS because i saw someone else do it and i think its cool#chilaios#fucking sure ill put this in the other tags too#chilchuck#laios#thats it#otherwise ill get embarassed#guhhh DO YOU GET IT DO YOU UNDERSTAND MEEE
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Bonus round! Do you use a queue tag?
#ive been super curious about this because people seem to have really strong opinions on the queue! so many people seem to HATE it#but i love using the queue! i dont really know exactly why i like it so much- i started using in like... 2016 and its a fundamental part of#my tumblr experience now. i think i started off just using it for offline hours so id hit most my american mutuals (/ for aes posts)#but these days basically everything goes in my queue (cept time sensitive things & like. current hype and original posts-#anything 'normal' posting is in the queue)#idk it feels. nice to me! i like to spread out my posting and not rb 30 things in half an hour and then disappear for the rest of the day#esp since my spaces are so circular- the same post runs on my dash a dozen times minimum. and i get to put it on ur dash a week late!!!#and its so nice to have small interactions with mutuals in incompatible timezones; to open up my notifications in the morning#and go: oh! my friends were here <3#its such a Part of the tumblr experience for me i dont think i could ever truly change now. maybe switch to timed queueing#but my availability changes so much i prefer to just. know i guess#but (i am so sorry for all that) im curious about how other people feel!!!!!! itd be so interesting to hear abt why people do/do not like i#i know some people like the experience of spamming and going. some people think it makes this seem to much like influencing or whatever#everyone has their reasons and i want to know!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#nyxtalks#poll#queue#no see answers option because you must fall into one of these
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i think what i adore about ladynoir beyond high school age (18 and over) is the opportunity it leaves for some of the most DELICIOUS best friends to lovers scenarios. because, like, two people who've been fighting side by side for years? who've known each other long enough to make jokes about it, haha remember when we were fourteen and you-- we AGREED to never speak of it!!!! who've spent so long learning each other inside out, even, in chat noir's case, getting over feelings, that the idea of anything romantic between them is so far off the radar that they don't feel the need for certain boundaries, because why would it matter if they made jokes about how attractive they find each other, about getting married, about how they could totally mess with the rest of the miracle team by pretending they're hooking up because it's so far out of the realm of possibility.
but then there would be that imperceptible shift. the moment where one of them makes a joke and it feels just a bit more loaded than it should. gazes lingering where they never lingered and playful smiles turning curious. the sudden awareness that, while maybe they were cuddling on a rooftop with their best friend, they were also wrapped up in the arms of someone they trust with their lives, and is extremely attractive, and, wait, if the only reason it was platonic before was because there were no feelings, what does THIS mean?
THE TENSION. THE PINING. THE INHERENT MESS OF BEING IN YOUR TWENTIES. PLEASEEEE
#as i go through more things in life i ache for ladynoir to experience it too#i want them to be at a grocery store and for him to reach out to tickle her and she turns around and makes a joke but their gazes linger way#too knowingly#i want them to sit down and have a 'okay like this is so tmi but isnt the concept of sex so weird??' conversation#i want them to joke about starting a podcast together#make impulsive amazon purchases that make no sense#find a song that one of them hate and then continuously play it on loop#compare spotify profiles and one of them steals the other's login to sabotage their spotify wrapped for the year#do you know i am so normal about ladynoir#♡alizeh talks♡#tagged:ladynoir
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hope you feel better soon!
I am riddled with ailments, but I stay silly!
#ask#non mdzs#My health journey has been: Hernia -> acid reflux -> Vocal pain due to aforementioned reflux -> chest infection.#I'm terrified to know what's about to hit me next. Please let it be something kind. PLEASE.#The consequence of living with linguists is that you'll wake up with a wacked up voice -#suddenly you're sitting you down in front of a program called something like Praat having your shimmer and jitter levels calibrated.#They gave me a GRBAS of 33012. I have a fun thing called a pitch break where a whole octave just does not exist.#My vocal pain was bad enough I ended up seeing a speech pathologist and that whole experience was super neat!#I learnt a lot about voice - to be honest I might make a little comic on it after some more research. Fascinating stuff.#For example; your mental perception of our voice modulates the muscles of the vocal folds and larynx.#meaning that when you do have changes (inflammation = more mass = lower frequency)#your brain automatically attempts to correct it to what it 'should sound like'. Leading to a lot more vocal strain and damage!#And it gets really interesting for trans voice care as well - because the mental perception of one's voice isn't based on an existing sampl#So a good chunk of trans voice training is also done with the idea of finding one's voice and retraining the brain to accept it. Neat!#Parkinsonial Voice also has this perception to musculature link! The perception is that they are talking at a loud/normal volume#but the actual voice is quite breathy and weak. So vocal training works on practicing putting more effort into the voice#and retraining the brain to accept the 'loud' voice as 'normal'.#Isn't the human body fascinating?#Anyhow; Now I have vocal exercises and strategies to reduce strain and promote healing.#Which is a lot better than my previous strategy of yelling AAAH in my car until my 'voice smoothed out'.#You can imagine the horror on the speech path's face. I am an informed creature now.#I'm my own little lab rat now. I love learning and researching. Welcome to my tag lab. Class is dismissed.#I'll be back later with a few more answered asks </3 despite everything I'm still going to work and I need the extra sleep.#Thank you for the well wishes! And if you read all of that info dump; thank you for that as well!
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Experiments with pupils and mouths that devolved into shenanigans :)
#you can really tell I was having a normal one when I drew these#I like many of the pupil experiments but don't really like mouths on my iterators#i've seen some people do mouths on itties well though#...really enjoyed noisy cat spearmaster with a mouth tbh#no plans on changing how i usually draw things rn. this was just for fun#Sometimes I miss having pupils and mouths to work with (on slugcats and itties)#Not having either on iterators can be a unique challenge that forces me to practice my body language more#which I like drawing anyways so it works out#antennae are suuuper fun to use for expressions too#rain world#flickerdoodles#art#group pic
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Roomba
Honestly Danny would be the first to admit that trying to overshadow anything after the Technus incident was a bad idea. But he was also a very bored teenager, visiting a strange city at the request of his older sister so, can you blame him?
It had seemed like a fun idea to the halfa the moment he saw a small roomba in a store window in Gotham. It didn't look like many wanted to buy it but it was there anyway.
So yes, Danny could admit that it was all a strange combination of his boredom and lack of sleep because before he knew it he had overshadowed the damn roomba, causing the light above it to glow bright green.
It was just luck that some of his powers worked, because he made it through the store window with no problems, and had some fun chasing the denizens of Gotham all over the place.
It wasn't so much fun when he realized he was stuck inside the roomba; or when some people started to look at the machine curiously, trying to catch it.
He managed to escape with some luck and set about being a real nuisance to anyone he came across, including the clown laughing like a maniac and the live scarecrow, because well, what other option did he have besides waiting for it to sort itself out?
It wasn't long before the bats heard the report of "a roomba on the loose" in disbelief. Dick wondered if Alfred would appreciate them bringing the machine to the mansion to help him with cleaning.
#dpxdc#Roomba Danny#He's overshadowing it#and having some fun#scaring Gotham criminals#and normal citizens because why not#until he noticed he was a bit stuck#unlike other ghosts Danny doesn't have a lot of experience overshadowing things#much less machinery#and he was very tired that day#so he got stuck#dp x dc#dc x dp#Jazz sent Danny to investigate Gotham because she knew her little brother would be safe#And she's moving to Gotham for a while anyway#She's going to do an internship at Arkham and she's looking for a way to get Danny to move in with her#the bats doesn't know what to think about the roomba#They have heard reports of it chasing the Joker and Penguin#Jason thinks they should let it be#Tim is considering if it's some joke from someone#Dick wants to bring the roomba to the mansion
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"ohh thorin trusts Bilbo above his own family and kin because he just loves him sooo much because I think romantic love is superior to any other form of love" or maybe it was he was experiencing a severe episode of paranoid psychosis and he implicitly trusted Bilbo because he was the only person in the Company who didn't have any preexisting, longstanding loyalities to him (as a King or brother-in-arms or Family or otherwise) and followed him purely out his own desire to and he saw Bilbo stay by his side even after his contract had ended even though he knew how much he wanted to go home (and had every reason to at that point). maybe it was because he knew Bilbo would had nothing to gain by betraying him (re: no birthright to the crown, no desire for riches or property, etc). Maybe he believed he could confide into Bilbo because he felt like he wasn't responsible for his safety in the same way he felt responsible for his nephews or his kin (as their King), and he no longer need to mantain any sort of formalities or barriers with him (because Thorin is not. his. King).
sorry I just refuse to believe Thorin doesn't love his nephews as much as he loves Bilbo (someone who he'd only known for 6~ months at that point) and I think there's a lot of better ways to explain his behavior here
#can you tell I've gotten sick of seeing people dumb down this plot point and thorin's goldsickness in general#people be normal about psychosis challenge!! (impossible)#alluding to that post I made a while back about it#this doesn't conflict with bagginshield in any way either. if anything I'd argue it adds more depth to it#all I'm saying is that it's kind of ludicrous to imply Thorin loved his nephews or cousins to a lesser degree#especially if you believe it's JUST because Thorin's love for Bilbo is romantic#pychosis is a bitch and can make you do things you'd never wish to do in a million years (speaking as a schizophrenic person)#and there's a million reasons why persecatory delusions can make you trust one person you love over another#and at least in my experience it's NEVER been just because I didn't love the other person “enough”#my post#the hobbit#thorin oakenshield#bilbo baggins#bagginshield
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BAWKtober Day 3 - Cider Press
Can't wait for a sippy sippy~
If you'd like to support my BAWKtobering by buying a commission or a treat for my spoiled, spoiled chickens, all my links are in my pinned- *i am immediately mobbed by a flock of chickens and dragged off stage in a cloud of feathers*
#Kinda late cuz i'm trying out some new hatching brushes i got for ivy's feathers and it took a little to get the hang of#but once i do i think it will save my hands#normally i'd do hatching by hand but my joints are at the point where i'm like Work Smarter Not Harder#and i think it turned out nice! it gives nice texture#it'll be fun to experiment more#still haven't found an easier way to draw poppy's and i fear i never shall this is my fate#okay anyways#BAWKtober 2024#BAWKtober#cider press#makenna made a thing#chickens#tiny fluffy dinosaurs#the BEST animals#chickenblr#birdblr#october art challenge#drawing prompts#autumn#fall#artists on tumblr#daily drawing#apple cider#why did i practically paint render the dripping cider in this that was so unnecessary lol#i am possessed but the spirit of BAWKtober
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I'm an "AroAce Stereotype" I'm Romance averse/Repulsed> I'm Sex repulsed I'm non-partnering I hate the idea of marriage in all forms I don't want a QPR at all I'm loveless I'm someone who gets uncomfortable at sexual talk and sex jokes I'm someone who often has innuendos or sexual concept fly over my head. I'm someone who can't tell when someone is flirting with me I'm someone who can't pick up on romantic or sexual tension I'm someone who finds "shipping" to be annoying I'm someone who says "They just seem like friends to me" I'm someone who believed that attraction could be turned on or off I'm someone who can't make sense of romance at all and cant figure out what makes it different from every other relationship. I'm someone who thinks romance is stupid and sex is gross and I don't understand the big deal everyone makes about it I'm someone who never was upset to find out I was AroAce but rather relieved as I have a genuine fear of being stuck in a romantic relationship that i do not want. In all cases I am not an AroAce who can be considered "normal" by the standards of allo society.
I'm not just a stereotype for you to shit on. I'm not the reason aphobes are aphobic I'm not a problem that you need to erase and refute to be accepted by allos. I'm not an experience that you and ignore as "not really how aspec people are" just because You are not part of it. Stop leaving us behind. Stop throwing us under the bus. We deserve support too. We deserve to not be demonized and shunned because we're an "stereotype". We are not the problem. We are not a problem to be fixed. start fighting aphobes on their logic instead of trying to make up for our existence.
#text#ace#aro#asexual#aromantic#aroace#arospec#acespec#aspec#mostly talking abt aroace experience because thats me#but this can go for other aspec identities too#aphobia#im just tired of other aspec people agreeing with the oppressors that certain experiences are wrong#and promising that THEY aren't like that THEY are normal and shouldn't be ridiculed#but never do anything to protect the rest of us from ridicule#because really they just want to protect their experience they dont care about the wider community#and it's frustrating#because we should all be supporting each other because thats how things get better#if we tell aphobes there are exceptions then suddenly all aspec people can become an exception#because they dont care about us being socially acceptable aspecs they care about us not being aspec period#they dont want us to exist because then they have to question their world view and that dont like doing that#so they'll play nice with the ones they can pretend are normal before they decide that you're not good enough either
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trans woman: well before my egg cracked, [goes into explicit detail about the social and gender alienation she experienced and the background radiation of dysphoria that she did not realize was dysphoria and how it seeped into so much of her life]
some brain genius: well really this is so vague it could apply to anything. have you considered that we should encourage men to be gnc instead of transgender actually
#spitblaze says things#im going to walk directly into the ocean#some of you really cannot listen to a trans woman talk about her experience growing up and seeing other people go 'yeah same'#without going 'well this is normal and hardly about being trans. maybe you were just bullied in high school'#friend you either need to do some serious introspection about what you consider normal or shut the fuck up#transphobia tw#transmisogyny tw#SPITBLAZE SMASH
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we were sitting on the floor and i was cutting out tiny pictures to make a collage for a friend's birthday. you were on your phone and you laughed about something, and i was still in love with you then, so i asked what had you giggling.
"sorry. i was just..." you took a moment and went back to texting. "i was telling someone about how you're afraid of the dark."
i'm afraid of the dark because something bad happened. "oh." i felt a little slinky of shame crawl down my throat.
you glanced up, and maybe it showed on my face, because you rolled your eyes and held the phone to the side casually so i could see the group chat. "what? was it a secret?"
i looked down to the scissors in my hand. "i just..." no, it's not a secret. it just felt like something private, something serious. saying why would you tell someone that just feels like an accusation. it's unfair. i honestly am not even ashamed of it, it's just a fact about my person that i don't usually share.
what a strange experience. is this a human thing or a generational thing? for our grandparents: did they need to worry about how quickly someone can just... share your personal information? again, i didn't even really have a true objection. what could i say? i want any person in my life to feel they can be honest with their friends. it's not like i said don't tell anyone this.
i cut out another letter to complete the rainbow happy birthday, started hunting for the exclamation mark. i heard you sigh dramatically.
"don't make a big deal about this," you said.
this entire conversation was a pattern for us, and this was when we got to my least favorite part of the pattern. i would get my feelings hurt in some oblique not-technically-terrible way, and then it would be making a big deal about something. you'd get frustrated for me for being soft, but i was born soft. you knew i was soft when you pierced me. it's one of the things that made controlling me so easy.
"i'm not," i felt my voice crack. the question came without my wanting. "why are you guys talking about me?" and why are you saying that thing? why not like - i'm telling them how you're generous and kind and pretty.
you let out this low, tragic groan. "oh my god." you tossed the phone away from your body. "there, see? i just won't talk to them if you don't like it."
the rest of the hour went the way it always went, between us: i said i don't actually mind if you talk to your friends but -, you found a way to call my minor expression of discomfort "being dramatic." you got upset that i had been offended. i ended up apologizing, even though i hadn't actually done anything.
afterwards, you picked up the phone again. after texting for a little bit, you snorted. "okay," you said, "but it is kind of funny you're afraid of the dark. i mean, when you think about it."
#spilled ink#writeblr#i'm trying to write about this really specific and wierd new experience#that i think is specific to the internet generation#where people you trust can just... say whatever??? and while most people are trustworthy#sometimes they'll just like... put ur shit out there????#and the thing is that sometimes it's GOOD - i want you to tell ppl if ur partner is being cruel!!!!!#i want u to be like ''hey is it normal if xyz happens'' ... but stuff like ''she's afraid of the dark''#PARTICULARLY when it's CLEARLY making fun of me....#what is the point of that.#this is huge and complicated and happens outside of romantic relationships too btw#like someone u thought of as a friend will be like . oh did u know she's scared of heights and it's like.#girl why are u fuckin doing that tho?#it's not a SECRET i just ...???????????????????????#and i think that gross feeling of like -- ''i can't REALLY be upset bc there's not a TRUE RULE about this....''#it's just not something talked about. bc it's so specific and yet so complex#bc how could i say like '' this is a violation of trust'' when it... technically I GUESS isn't????????????#idk maybe im just like super sensitive but please tell me in the comments/tags/etc if this is#something u have experienced (a trusted person like spreading ur shit) and if u were cool with it
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I hate the term "religious guilt" because most people who use it are severely muddling up (a) religious OCD (b) some messed up heresy like "it's wrong to be happy" (c) religious doctorine you don't agree with but aren't sure whether you're right not to
#and like. *these are SO not the same*#(a) doesn't have much to do with religion per se; if you were an atheist you could have ocd about recycling#(b) doesn't have much to do with *official* religion; just with your parents#and (c) is. normal. people revisiting their convictions and being troubled when two sources teach differently is a thing. that happens.#it's part of the human experience okay
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discovering someone has the same interest as you but then discovering that they like it in a normal way and not in a all-encompassing-this-is-all-i-think-about-morning-noon-and-night way is a truly humbling experience
#liking things a normal amount ?#what do you mean you don't experience obsession ?#i am not normal#i like things until they consume me#marauders#marauders era#dead gay wizards#wolfstar#jegulus#and co
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I am beginning to suspect that my success in communicating with the socially awkward, highly skilled, specialist technology team members is not just down to "having lots of experience talking to my dad"
#You need something from a guy#And the team go#“ah Colin can be a bit tricky sometimes”#And then I go and have a simple and straightforward conversation with Colin#!?!#And I go#It was exactly like asking my dad for help!#Which I have YEARS of experience in#Why is my dad socially awkward?#Why are details about this One Thing a basis of communication?#Why do I get good results with people 'like my dad' where others struggle?#Hmmmm#anyhooo#The most normal of the siblings just got diagnosed#With the adhd and the autism#And I look at her and go#Gurl YOU are the normal one#... My suspicion grows
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