#nobody has asked about it and I doubt anybody will so
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
jewelthenerd · 6 days ago
Text
thinking about my pirate au again so here’s a little sketch of pirate au macaque
Tumblr media
Yeah I changed his design a lot, in fact I didn’t even look at the design reference while I made this, but y’know what, I like this design better anyways
52 notes · View notes
jjk4isen · 3 months ago
Text
ꗃ 𝐓𝐎 𝐘𝐎𝐔, 𝟏𝟎𝟎𝟎 𝐘𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐒 𝐅𝐑𝐎𝐌 𝐍𝐎𝐖.
Tumblr media
❝ you're not a curse, you have never been. you were my blessing and my salvation– the best thing that has ever happened to me. you cleared my skies and showed me how it was to love… and be loved. ❞
summary: when your entire village faced the king of curses' wrath, you were sure you'd be as good as food for him but life decides to weave the strings of fate and intertwine yours with the very person who tries to cut it short.
desc: 8.6k words, f!reader, sfw, angsty angst hehe, major character death, cannibalistic thoughts (sukuna is a cannibal after all), takes place in the heian era, true form sukuna, bit ooc bc we know his ass isn't capable of love, ! slightly gory parts!, this is canon bc i said so, kenjaku isn't known as kenjaku yet – he's still known as noritoshi kamo, yorozu mentioned, basically just me raw dogging the storyline during the heian era lol.
notes: this took way longer than it should but i battled like three burn out sessions to write this so lmao. also does anybody get the aot reference in the title? this might MIGHT have a part two if i can think of a good plot to mirror it. if you get the reference, you'll alr know what it's going to be titled :P
Tumblr media
must be horrifying isn't it? being a mere human amongst sorcerers and curse users capable of destroying and killing— powerless among the powerful whose thirst for yet more power remain a bottomless pit of unquenchable desire.
in this state of the world, your life wasn't your own. it belonged to the people who were strong enough to kill you or considerate enough to spare you.
and among dangers looming throughout, one triumphs all. one whose name was even powerful enough to send curses back at just the mention of it.
ryomen sukuna. feared by curses and non curses alike. the ruthless evil entity who feeds off of humans. there is no doubt about him being the king of curses, capable of having any being in the palm of his hands.
including you.
your village faced the wrath of the king of curses himself, not a brick was intact nor a rock left unturned. and what's even worse? he didn't have any reason for his destruction. he just did it out of his sheer will.
perhaps you should consider yourself lucky to have your life spared, along with some other women and children. all the men were gone without traces — maybe for the better.
trapped in the basement of the castle’s kitchen, you await your fate to be eaten.
what was that you said before? lucky? no, you realise how horribly wrong you were. the wails and cries of terror as yet another person was dragged out of the small room was enough to ring in your ears forever.
the sudden quietness that followed soon after was enough to suffocate you.
the room was dark, wet and disgusting. it reeked of decomposed bodies and blood. nobody was fed well and even if one or two loaves of pitiful bread were thrown into the small cell, it wasn't nearly enough to feed a group of starving people.
at least the number keeps decreasing day by day.
you'd notice how the people who cried, begged or fought back were likely speeding up their deaths so you kept to yourself, waiting for your turn, even if it's just a while later.
after what you think was a couple of days came your turn. you had lost your perception of everything in this tiny suffocating room; you might as well be dead.
you heard some loud clanks of the metal door and suddenly, a harsh pull sends you essentially flying towards whoever was grabbing you.
“this is the last one” you heard a gruff voice say as a light shone inside. it felt like ages since you saw any sort of light, of warmth. in a way, you were relieved. your suffering must be finally coming to an end.
“its this one isn't it?” a low voice asks as they being a lamp closer to inspect you. your eyes were opened and after a long while, you saw again.
“why is she in such a weakly state?” the person holding the lamp grimaces at your sight. through your hazy vision, you could still make out the white hair, perfectly in place. they were beautiful.
“well that ain't my fault is it?” the big creature yanks your arm and you fall wherever it does.
suddenly shards of ice fill the room and the fire from the lamp is put out. in its place is a glowing icy caricature of the creature, holding you intact.
as terrifying as cursed techniques can be, they were also mesmerising. the beautiful fridgid sculpture leave you in awe; the rough hand holding your arm was now frozen and unmoving.
“now.” the icy person leans down, meeting your eye level, you hadn't realised the dim moonlight illuminating the ice crystals in the room “what shall we do with you?”
───────────── 🃜 🃚 🃖 🃁 🂭 🂺
the next time you're concious enough to make out your surroundings, you find yourself in a small dimly lit room. it was heaven in comparision to the previous one.
you scrumble towards the small lamp and take in the warmth. you had no idea where you were, what happened or what would happen but for now, you were alive. barely, but alive still.
weakly, you sit on the floor— there isn't anywhere else to sit anyway. upon hugging your knees you notice an apparent bruse on your arm. the same place where you were grabbed, the memories come back slowly.
did the white haired person save you? could you maybe have a chance at life?
no, being in captivity by the king of curses himself tells you enough that you weren't going to make it out of here alive. well, it's not like you necessarily want to either. your home and the people in it were gone, some of whom you witnessed their end.
it's only fair for you to meet the same fate as them.
the sound of the door unlocking interrupts your thoughts, then in came the person with snow like hair.
“finish this” they hold out a tray of food and set it down next to you. you only lean away defensively.
without so much of another word, they make their way towards the door that is, until you decided to stop them.
“you saved me didn't you?” it had been a while since you even heard your own voice and you don't miss the way it sounded more resigned than it had ever been.
“do not be fooled. it is all in consideration for my master. finish the plate” with that they walk away, leaving you with even more questions than before.
───────────── 🃜 🃚 🃖 🃁 🂭 🂺
when the certain white haired person decides to show up, they look pleased with your health. well, it should come as a no surprise since they keep feeding you — overfeeding you in fact. and you know why.
fatten up the stock so that it's in top shape when it's time to consume it.
“follow me” they say, holding the door open.
obediently, you follow the person you owe your life to, for now anyway, and they lead you through alleys and stairways you had never seen before.
only sounds of footsteps and your exhausted huffs can be heard in the hallway filled with various markings on the wall. you don't even want to know what they mean.
“so… how do i call you?” you manage to ask, maybe if you try to get close to them, maybe they can help a second time.
don't kid yourself.
no reply comes and you feel heat rush to your cheeks from embarassment. but hey at least you tried.
your wandering eyes missed to see them stop before a certain door and you crash into them with a grunt. they must be well built because the impact did not faze them at all.
“sorry” you rub your nose that was sore from bumping your face into their back.
“i go by uraume. i am master sukuna's loyal servant. beyond this door is the garden and you are to take a walk twice a day to build up your stamina. i shall be checking on you daily.”
“why should i need to do that?”
“do as you are told. now go” they open the door for you.
beyond the door is a garden too beautiful to belong in the palace of such an abominable being. flowers of all kind adjourn each corner, flourishing in all their bloosoming glory.
the sky was as clear as can be, with the sun brightly shining as if it's wishing people a good day. the birds chirping and the gentle breeze that brushes through your hair reminds you of your home back in the village and your heart aches a little.
“thankyou” you turn back but uraume is now long gone.
gee must people be so cold around here?
you stroll along the garden, savoring your time outside in so long. how long has it been exactly? you couldn't recall. maybe you should ask uraume the next time they come around.
───────────── 🃜 🃚 🃖 🃁 🂭 🂺
only this time when uraume does show up, they don't lead you towards the garden. instead, you find yourself at the door of the king of curses’ throne room.
uraume doesn't say a word and only ushers you in.
is this doomsday? you recall the screams of fear from the people you used to share a home with. the look on their faces, their nails desperately clinging onto the prison bar while pleading for mercy — all of that for naught.
and the silence that followed.
it's possible that the well timed meals and the strolls you took in the beautiful garden was the mercy your people begged for but never got.
maybe you should be thankful you even got to have those.
“master is impatient. you should go in right this instant” uraume insists. something about their behaviour tells you if you don't do as told, you'd have a fate worse than what you could ever think of.
with all the courage you could muster, you unlock the door and take strides into it, as confident as you could make it seem.
the four armed monster looms in front of you, starting down at you as if you were only a mere bug.
perhaps you were — small and helpless, under the mercy of the predator who had seen you.
you bow politely, it seemed like it was the only appropriate thing to do.
sukuna thinks you're pathetic.
just a mere human and not worth his time. there was only a small reason as to why he hasn't had his way with you yet.
your flesh and blood.
to him, you smelled hauntingly sweet and hypnotisingly alluring. that was what drew him to your village in the first place — the hunt for the sweet scent that awakened all his senses, although he doesn't have any idea why.
sukuna is a curious being, he seeks to know the mysteries of the world — one of the reasons why he's so wise, adding to his strength.
so until he has his answers, he plans to keep you around. after that, he can enjoy your flesh however he wants.
just you standing mere feet away from him was enough to tempt him to bite you already. how would it feel to sink his teeth into your skin and have your blood flow down his throat? sukuna couldn't wait until he has the chance to do so.
“leave.” the monster only dismisses you after staring at you so intently, he might as well be staring deep into your soul.
you look up at him in confusion, why would he call you here without any particular reason?
“do your ears not work, human?” sukuna says, rather impatiently.
“lower your gaze and know your place, fool” he practically growls and you look away faster than the speed of light. one more bow and you're bolting out the door.
───────────── 🃜 🃚 🃖 🃁 🂭 🂺
your stay at the palace was a cycle of eating, sleeping and taking strolls. it was beginning to get monotonous, boring even. but its much better than facing the king of curses ever again.
you still had no idea why he called you to his throne room and honestly, you don't even want to find out why.
life wasn't so bad — the flowers were beautiful and smelled lovely, the meals were scrumptious and your sleep? well nightmares were inevitable but there were nights when you slept like a log.
and unbeknownst to you, a certain four eyed creature could be seen watching over you. no, observing you. its only right for him to observe his prey right?
it's not out of the goodness of his heart that when you whimper and cry out in your sleep because of a weak nightmare curse looming over your head, he kills it with only a tilt of his own. no, it's only because that curse deters your well being, hence your development to reach your full potential to be a perfect feast for him. nothing more.
weak human, you don't have the means to kill such a low grade curse or even see it. so why were you special? what makes you so different than the other filthy beings with no cursed techniques roaming the earth? sukuna still couldn't tell.
he's aware though — of your silent fear and unspoken resentment you have towards him. he's aware of your quivering soul whenever you sense his presence. he's aware of your desire to escape this place.
but he's also aware of how your smile becomes a little more genuine when you smell a particular flower in his garden. he's aware of how your eyes soften when you see the setting sun. he's aware of how you tried to get close to uraume and only get shut out. he's aware of you.
and that angers him to no end.
what infuriates him even more is how that pathetic servant thinks he can talk to you, and with such ease too. how dare he speak lowly of you? that's a direct insult to him isn't it?
‘you mean less than a concubine?’ sukuna scoffs at him for even comparing you to one.
so the next time he calls the council for a lecture, he doesn't even blink one of his four eyes when the said servant in question gets slashed by his formidable cursed technique.
the room grows thick with the smell of blood that was now splashed all over the carpets and tapestry hanging on the wall—a grueling task for the cleaners later.
“every tongue that rises against my prey shall fall.” the headless body of his once loyal servant serve as testimony to his words.
the palace may be big but rumours flew around: another servant ruthlessly executed by the monstrous beast. even the people under him weren't given an ounce of consideration.
is it a coincidence that it was the same person who cornered you just a day ago? you don't ponder.
───────────── 🃜 🃚 🃖 🃁 🂭 🂺
after the ruthless slaughter of your village and everything in it, it didn't take long for sukuna to find his next target.
it wasn't anything new to anybody at all that he was a bloodthirsty beast, revelling in chaos and ruin. one after another, his victims were crushed mindlessly and so easily, it made you sick how powerless other people are in comparison to him.
out of all his battles and countless destruction, one prominent opponent was the fujiwara clan.
they were an elite clan, taking pride in the strength of their squadrons. the world held its breath upon hearing of the battle, maybe they had the potential to rival the king of curses.
the outcome didn't change though. sukuna remained prevalent—bringing the sun, moon and stars at his feet. the five empty generals did not even measure upto him.
the battle must have been so agonising to the point where the authorities were willing to hold festivals in his honour, out of utter terror.
it was at this harvest festival where sukuna had encountered a certain shameless sorcerer who was on her way to be completely obsessed with him.
yorozu had only one goal: to alleviate sukuna's loneliness with her love — something she believed only she was capable of.
thus why she leeches onto him, much like a hick. perhaps sukuna doesn't see her as a threat or he deems her powerful enough, he didn't get rid of her, for now at least.
however, her dreams were short lived.
yorozu sits next to sukuna in his throne room, enticing him with gentle nudges of her exposed chest. her haori was united and her hair fell graciously past her shoulders all the way down her chest.
she only shrieks in horror as she stares at the uninterested man. “you look different… you are different!” she screams angrily.
sukuna only hums in response, deep in thought of how his little prey has been holding up. despite his festivities and celebrations, you were there in the back of his mind, like an itch that cannot be quite scratched.
she stares at him, stepping back further and further “it couldn't be…”
yorozu brings herself to her knees, looking up at sukuna desperately. “i have so much more to teach you about love and the ultimate strength and solitude that it brings!”
she rises, her eyes were erratic, anyone would be afraid of her outburst that was about to come. anyone but sukuna.
“im the one who will teach you about love. that is my purpose and my goal. now tell me, who is it that is taking away your loneliness?”
sukuna raises a brow. it's possibly the only time he indulges yorozu’s antics and also the last.
“i will find out who it is! it doesn't matter if i have to tear this palace apart” yorozu violently darts out the room in search of something, anything. to her, if it was powerful enough to move sukuna then she would have no trouble finding whatever it is.
and she doesn't. not because you're too powerful but rather because of the lack of it. you stuck out like a sore thumb with no cursed energy running through your body, weak and unarmed just strolling across the garden— like the pathetic human you are.
sukuna arrives at the scene, ever observing, ever thinking.
“that is not true love” yorozu mutters, her fists were clenched on her sides as her gaze burnt into you who was unknowing of the fury burning inside her.
“you're mistaken, sukuna. i will show you what real love looks like!” yorozu screams, making her way towards you who could only stare at her in fear, frozen in place.
it would take sukuna less than a blink of his eye to stop her but he was intrigued. what would he feel if you were to be killed? would he feel pain? anger? the beast always finds his answers so he waits.
and what was that about true love? does that woman think he was capable of it? with you, no less? she sees you, a mere human, as a threat so that must mean something.
yorozu lands on you, digging her nails into your skin, blood gushing out of it. sukuna admires the sight.
you scream in agony as she continue to scratch through you and into you with ease. a maniac expression forms on her face at your slowed breaths and now silent helpless whimpers.
but before you were completely gone, sukuna gets rid of her. you were too busy holding onto your life to tell how he did it but one blink was enough for her to be gone and another makes you realise you were caged in the arms of the four armed monster.
“interesting” you heard sukuna say, before your lashes flutter and your eyes close against your will.
sukuna holds your limp body in his arms protectively with calculated gentleness as if a slight jerk would hurt you. well, in your state, it would.
upon watching you get torn apart, sukuna realises he isn't as heartless as he deemed himself. it drives him angry. how could a being as weak as you would have the capability to move him? how could you inflict pain onto him when you're the one who's at his mercy? he scoffs at how ridiculous it is all.
but when his eyes land on you– your fragile body almost lifeless and bleeding, his only thought was towards your safety and not towards devouring you, albeit the sweet scent of your blood tempting him and calling out to him to drink it.
he stares at his hands tainted with the pretty crimson colour, glistening in the sun but it pales in comparison to the way your eyes were shut as if you were only asleep. sukuna sighs, alright then.
his reversed cursed technique flows through his body into your own, healing the deep tears and cuts. he only hopes you aren't too angry at him for waiting that long to step in.
your staggered breathing was replaced with slow even ones and your wounds disappeared as if they had never been there in the first place. a peaceful expression forms on your face and all of sukuna's eyes soften.
───────────── 🃜 🃚 🃖 🃁 🂭 🂺
the next time you awaken you find yourself in the comfort of your own room making you doubt if everything that happened was a vivid dream. and you would have believed that doubt if not for the person sitting in the corner of your room, his four arms folded into each other.
you flinch upon seeing him and sit straight up, a groan escapes you involuntarily from your sore body.
“you're awake, brat” his deep voice sends shivers down your spine.
you nod slightly, your eyes on anything besides him.
“how are you feeling?” this makes you jolt your head towards him because did he just ask about your well being? you would say you misheard but the frown and distaste on his face only confirms that he was, in fact, concerned about your condition somehow.
“im feeling alright” you say quietly, still a bit afraid of the man sitting in your room who could easily overpower you if he wanted.
“i should hope so. your weak body didn't take much to heal as easily injurable as it is” he sneers from the shadows that enveloped him.
“so it wasn't a dream?” your voice shook a little which doesn't go unnoticed.
“no. i have taken care of the matter. you may rest at ease” he rises to his feet, he looks way too big to feel safe around. you hug your blankets a little tighter. wait, when did you even have that many?
“do not fear. i do not intend to harm you.” two out of four eyes narrow at you and how scared of him you looked. sukuna doesn't like how that bothers him.
“how do i know that?” your eyes didn't meet him, rightfully so, if it was anyone else who questioned him, sukuna would waste no second getting rid of them altogether.
“it is i.” a viable answer – one that doesn't need any further explaination. sukuna maybe a merciless hard hearted being but he's also a man of his words. anyone who knows him would be aware of this fact.
“but i don't know you.”
he supposes you're right. in a way, nobody knows him. this was also why he remained so strong despite people and sorcerers alike sharpened themselves while fighting him. he did not have an opening to allow them to kill him.
“then you can start from this moment forward.”
“i don't want to.” for the first time, sukuna faces disappointment; but it's a different kind of disappointment. normally he would be discouraged at how nobody was able to stand a chance against him but now, he feels helpless. much like he was the prey and you're the predator.
“and your reason for that is?” ever so curious, he glowered at your body which had somehow become smaller amongst the sheets of blanket you're enveloped by.
“because then… then i will grow to understand you. if i do understand you then that would mean id find out you have a heart. someone with a heart would never… would never…” your voice trails away and you look horrified by the memories flooding your mind.
“so i don't want to know you.” you muster up enough courage to stare into his eyes, all of his eyes and sukuna can feel your soul tremble.
he only watched silently as you fidget under his watchful gaze. great. he's at a loss by someone who's terrified of him, how much more could you hit a blow to his pride.
without a word, he steps out of your room and he could hear you exhale. he huffs in annoyance at how tense you are in his presence. and your words. they might as well be your cursed technique attacking him with every enunciation that came from your mouth.
and they were working.
───────────── 🃜 🃚 🃖 🃁 🂭 🂺
the world was somehow shifting. you couldn't exactly pinpoint where or how but it was.
“master has assigned you a new room that would be more comfortable for your stay” uraume says, standing in front of you in a polite stance. “please allow me to guide you there.”
if this is his attempt to make you forget about all the destruction he caused, for whatever reason, it was futile. he was irredeemable.
your thoughts might have been apparant on your face because uraume continues, “master says he does not have an ulterior motive. he simply wants you to be comfortable.”
since when did that beast care about other people's comfort except for his own?
“fine then, show me” if he offered, then there's no problem in accepting. heck maybe you should be taking advantage of his hospitality and ask for whatever you desire. he has put you on death's row and wiped of everyone you knew after all.
you were led to a room that was closer to the main area of the palace, a stark contrast to the basement of the kitchen — where you started from.
pieces of beautiful art were decorating each corner, finest tapestry hanging from the walls, and the curtains? they were of the best material you had ever known. no doubt, this was a room that exceeded even your dreams.
uraume opened the closet revealing kimonos of various kinds, from silk to linen to satin— every kind was there. “i was not aware of your taste so i assorted various kinds.”
you were amazed at the room, the materials – everything but these measly riches don't bring lives back and the monster certainly wasn't capable of any empathy so the words saying he has no ulterior motive were nothing but empty to you.
“what? have i been promoted from prey to concubine now?” the word alone makes you sick to your stomach but it's the only explanation that makes sense.
“you are very wrong. master does not keep concubines. it is only an extension of his kindness.” you laugh, sukuna? kindness? please.
four eyes narrowed at your bitter laugh, sukuna stands in the doorway, each of his two arms folded in each other. he has lost count of how much disrespect he tolerates from you but strangely, it does not give him a drive to kill, only annoyance.
a brow raises when you turn around after being aware of his presence and your laugh, as mocking as it was, dropped into a frown.
seeing how speechless you are, he huffs. from out of nowhere, he conjures up a bow and an arrow to go along with it. sukuna moves stealthily, one step and he's already next to you.
the bow and arrow are shoved into your hands “i have heard you are exceptionally good with these” sukuna says, his voice was low and calculating – if you hadn't known better, you'd say it quivered a little.
he wasn't wrong though, you had to hone some sort of hunting skill for food. life wasn't kind and you learnt it the hard way. nevertheless you felt safer with some kind of weapon you were familiar with, even though they won't be of much help against a sorcerer.
“master’s very own bow and arrow” uraume interrupted, their face had an expression of shock you had never seen on them before. there was an engraving on them– the same mark that sukuna had on his body.
“why give me this?” you ask and receive no answer. not because sukuna doesn't want to answer you, he simply doesn't have a reason. he just wanted you to have it. it felt natural. he'll be damned before he ever admits that to you or even to himself.
“what if i use it on you?” you press on, clutching onto the wooden weapon tightly. “what if i wanted to fire this at you?”
“i would let you.”
it caught you by surprise. why? you want to ask but you also didn't want to hear his reason. you don't want to know him. the little barrier you had put between you both is the only thing giving you leverage against such a vicious being, you couldn't afford to have it break down.
taking a quick abrupt step back, you line the end of the arrow to the bowstring and pull on it with an expert ease, aiming it at sukuna. uraume was about to step in but sukuna waves them off. as if the most feared curse user couldn't defend himself.
he could already have you breathing your last breath in a mere second if he wanted to but of course, he doesn't. he just stands there unmoving. his lack of response to your threat made you all the more aggravated.
“aren't you going to stop me?”
“no. proceed with whatever you intend to do, i shall not stop you.” sukuna's folded arms fell to his sides, giving you an open target for his heart.
now you should be firing your arrow with no hesitation right? you have hunted down countless moving targets from as small as a bird to something as big as a deer.
and they were running while you manage to hit a bullseye – every single time. so now this unmoving big target within just a few meters would be a piece of cake. it's your chance to end the tyranny of his wicked rule and him altogether– a chance that had not been granted to anyone who stands against him.
but your hands wouldn't move. they wouldn't let go of the string to propel the arrow towards him. they were frozen in place. you would have doubted uraume’s technique being in play but no signs of ice crystals found themselves anywhere near.
sukuna waits and you wonder if he was ever this patient.
your hands tremble, slowly letting your form down. why couldn't you just do it?
“human–”
sukuna's words were cut short by a swift arrow flying towards him. he didn't make a move to avoid it.
your trembling hands were now perfectly stable holding the bow. your breathing was calm, collected even. if anyone were to see you now, they'd wonder who the beast is. empty eyes deadpan at your target.
sukuna stares back, his cheek bleeding from the graze of the arrow. unlike your soul-less face, a satisfactory smile creeps onto sukuna's. “you didn't miss, did you? you aimed here on purpose.” his hands caress the small wound in awe.
“next time i wont.”
“as i have said, i will not stop you.”
───────────── 🃜 🃚 🃖 🃁 🂭 🂺
the new room was comfortable, all your needs were tended to and your conduct exceeded your desires. you were treated equal to a queen, if you knew how.
and uraume, sukuna's loyal servant, was now your own. they were still very distant though, not speaking more than they needed to. not like you really minded anyway.
uraume was there to observe. they were under strict orders to keep you safe and also report your daily status to sukuna. you weren't exactly aware of this part but there's no harm done so by logic, there wasn't a problem with it either.
sukuna finds the corner of his mouth twitch when uraume mentioned that you sang obnoxiously loud because you thought nobody was around. he'd have loved to hear that himself.
the amusing brief about you was however rudely interrupted by a strange person brave enough to march directly into the throne room unannounced.
“you're from the kamo clan aren't you? have you come to die a meaningful death?” sukuna's thirst for battle heightened upon seeing a sorcerer from one of the three main clans in jujutsu. maybe finally, he can have a strong opponent and enjoy the fight without having it end too early.
but the man only chuckles “no, i have come here to negotiate with the almighty king of curses himself”
sukuna frowns, now staring at him unamused “you do not have anything worth a value to me. fight or die a pathetic death.”
“i will do neither of those.” noritoshi kamo, stands face to face with sukuna without a hint of fear in his eyes and that makes sukuna curious. just what kind of offer does he have to be so bold?
“prove that you are worth my time you filthy scum” sukuna glowers at the man, getting more and more impatient by the second.
“how about that prey? how is your little prey doing?” kamo smirks and it's enough to tempt sukuna to cut through his skull but no, he refrains because anything that involves you, sukuna doesn't take it lightly.
“speak up or i��ll have you slashed.” sukuna remarks impatiently.
“it would be a shame to have her taken away from you isn't it?” the old man sneers.
the next thing he knows is his ragged breath and a sharp pain across his chest, kamo falls to his knees. sukuna’s technique had manifested a cut through his chest, although not deep enough to end him. with blood oozing out of the fresh cut and his mouth, he still has the courage to glare at the four eyed creature.
“you must not value your life” sukuna says nonchalantly, leaning against one of his hand, the grotesque sight was nothing new to him at all.
“your reign is coming to an end isn't it?” kamo laughs, although it comes out through splutters of blood. “no matter how powerful you are, you are not immortal sukuna, you still won't defeat death!”
as if sukuna is one to fear death. sukuna only sighs, revelling in the bloodied state of his intimidator.
“and your little human toy won't either” that earns a reaction from him. sukuna's eyes narrow at the pitiful man fighting for his life.
“what are you suggesting?”
“what if i tell you– that there is a way for you to be immortal? and that it's possible to find her in every lifetime?”
───────────── 🃜 🃚 🃖 🃁 🂭 🂺
everyone who knows sukuna knows that he does not get hurt. or yet, there's nobody who's strong enough to hurt him. generation upon generation, sorcerers have teamed up to get rid of him but with no luck. not even one of them could land a hit on the ferocious being.
all the more reason for you to be speechless when he returns with a huge hole in his stomach, bleeding continuously.
it was during your stroll that you saw him staggering over to his room.
okay maybe that was a lie. maybe you'd heard that a very prominent sorcerer in the jujutsu society had challenged him. you didn't know much about that world but it was enough to worry you, even if sukuna was undefeated.
so maybe that worry brings you into a situation where he arrived just while you were taking a stroll in the garden. you definitely didn't purposely take longer to watch the birds fly back to their nest in hopes of making sure sukuna returns. definitely not.
that's also NOT why you're knocking on his door boldly.
the door opens, revealing a confused sukuna. your eyes dart down to his injury but it seems the blood had stopped, still looking nasty regardless.
you wince just by looking at it but sukuna interrupts your unwarranted examination. “eyes here human. what do you want?”
for someone who's supposed to be prey, you're bold because in the next moment, you find yourself pushing through the door and asking him to sit down.
yes. you— a mere human, barged through his room and asked him to sit. when he doesn't comply, you walk up to him, pulling on one of his hands, guiding him towards his chair and sat him down. and strangely, no hint of protest came from him – not even a grunt or a growl.
with familiar ease, you call in uraume and ask for an emergency kit. they hesitate but comply regardless.
your expert hands slowly disinfect the wound and start stitching it up, not even sparing a glance at the man who just watches you and lets you do whatever you want to him.
“where have you garnered skills to do this?” sukuna asks mid stitch and it's only then that you realised he hasn't done so much as flinch. you could imagine how painful it would've been for a normal human but apparently this counts for nothing to him.
“when you're desperate enough, you just know” the last string goes through his flesh and you tie a knot, snapping the thread off. your movements slow when you realise you're touching him– skin and all, with your own.
your eyes lock when you search for his and they stare back. this time, you don't see a vicious brute but in its place, you see the eyes of a man. and not just any man, if you allowed your thoughts to wander you'd say it was the same look of a man capable of love.
but you don't – you look away. and sukuna's could feel a slight pull in his chest.
“human.”
“i have a name”
“human.”
the disregard for your name only makes you roll your eyes in annoyance. the man only chuckles at the sight.
“you do realise i can heal myself?”
a pause. of course how could you forget? reversed cursed technique they call it? all these magical powers granted to them made no sense to you at all. you only stare at the wall dumbfounded as sukuna downright laughs at your humiliated expression.
“why didn't you stop me then?” your grumble only amuses him further.
“perhaps because i wanted you to acknowledge how foolish you are?” his tone was teasing and not a hint of malicious intent was within it. a smile creeps on your lips and sukuna could swear his heart rate accelerated.
“i could show it to you if you're curious” your wide eyes give him all the confirmation he needed. sukuna rises on his feet, the prior horrid injury long forgotten.
“you could… take off the bandages. if they aren't effective anyway since you can heal” you shrug, trying to brush off your wholly service that was in fact not required in the first place.
“i rather they stay.” his hands graze them gently and you could swear he smiled at the pitiful mounts of cotton plastered on his abdomen.
“come. allow me to show you what im capable of.” he offers you a hand, out of the many he has and his shoulder slumps in relief when you take it without any protest.
he takes you outside and leads you towards your favourite spot in the garden. you don't let yourself wonder if it's a coincidence or not.
“see that fruit?” he gestures to a ripe apple hanging on its tree – super red and just the perfect size.
“yeah want about it?” you tilt your head towards him curiously making sukuna more enthusiastic to show you his perfectly crafted technique.
an invisible slash cuts the single fruit out of the tree, making it fall. it was barely noticeable and you'd think it fell on its own if not for the perfect slices it has all while it landed in the palm of your hands.
your wide eyed gaze only delights the man responsible for it. you take one slice off and admire the precision “you did this?? no way!”
sukuna heaves his chest proudly. strangely, your adulation to his antic gives him so much more satisfaction than wiping out an entire village.
“wait till you see this” sukuna takes a step back, his lips quirking up into a tight smirk upon seeing your expectant expression.
he places his hands together and gestures up signs that were not familiar to you. “fuga « open »” his low voice chants while fire manifests into the palm of his hands. he moulds the flames skillfully as it takes the shape of an arrow – a fire arrow.
and you're left with your mouth agape, he was truly terrifying. such bright flames don't even burn him but instead falls into his command.
sukuna likes the way you stare at him in wonder and was tempted to tell you that he created this very technique in honour of you and your bold decision in grazing his cheek with your arrow but for now, he holds his tongue and lets you admire as long as you want.
when the flames burn away, you're still in a haze— staring at the man in front of you with diluted pupils: one might think you're in love.
as sukuna focuses his eyes into your own, he's certain he could see into your soul which grows a little more familiar to him everytime he sees you. no it's not how he feels the familiar terror in someone's soul when they tremble in fear of him just as he was about to take their life.
it's not the same shudder of fear he used to feel when he's around you. this time, it's inviting. he feels he could be stripped of his technique and just be a normal being if it meant he could submerge himself in it.
───────────── 🃜 🃚 🃖 🃁 🂭 🂺
sukuna used to anticipate how he would die. he wanted to meet someone who would be strong enough to give him a formidable death fit for the most evil being to tread the world. news of fresh generation of strong sorcerers would excite him.
but the moment he knew he was entranced by you, that prior excitement was now replaced by fear. not fear for his death but rather, for yours. if anything were to happen to him, who would protect you?
it doesn't help how his enemies were catching hints on his possible weakness now. it all started with that damn bastard from the kamo clan, whom sukuna swears to kill. him and everybody else that could pose as a threat to you, he swears he will kill them all.
a little part of him also starts to fear for his own end. he fears that no matter how long he lives, he might think he doesn't have enough time with you. how could he when you're here, showing the sides or the world he never knew existed? the same world you weaved with every gentle word you say, no matter how insignificant.
sukuna can't get enough of the small smiles that were appearing more frequently when he reaches out to hold your tiny hand in his big ones.
he can't get enough of your soft snores when you're asleep in his chest– no more nightmares haunting your sleep because as long as he's around, any curse would have to fight him to get to you. no curse was bold enough to do so.
and mostly, he can't get enough of your small gentle strokes across his face. your touch was feather light and curious but so so loving that even when your hands were about to be pulled away, his own grabs them and makes them stay.
sukuna has nothing at all to base it off of, but if he had to name what he's feeling right now, it would be along the lines of complete devotion to you – in other words, he suspects it's the feeling these weak humans and yozoru keep preaching about: love.
and he's not denying it– not to himself at least or he can't. during his recent battles, he observes himself ending it as quick as possible.
instead of luxuriating in the thrill of battle, he finds himself rushing to kill his opponent – to end it as quick as it was humanely possible because every second he spends away from you is a second wasted.
he was becoming more precise and ruthless now that he has something to protect.
that's why even when you ask about his murder streak and if he could lessen it, he just ruffles your hair and tells you not to worry.
any sorcerer who has gotten close enough to land their sights on you were brutally tortured until they give up on their life altogether.
however, life can be funny at times. his own fear for your well being is possibly responsible for the curse that now latches onto you, consuming and draining the life out of you and sukuna's forced to watch as you slowly became a husk of who you used to be. so really, it's not funny at all.
he feels helpless and he is. none of the cursed techniques he has could exorcise the curse blooming inside you and spreading through your veins.
he has been warned before and he didn't care. he never fathomed to ever find someone to love so he traded his soul for his fervent reign – a binding vow: any being whose soul remotely gets near his own would ruin itself without any means for its resurrection.
another condition of the vow was for him to forget about it only after it was too late. at the time the vow was made, sukuna had thought, no, he'd known he lucked out by a power at the price of such a feeble condition but now… now he knows how gut wrenchingly wrong he was.
sukuna slumps in defeat at the sight of your weak body fighting itself. all his four hands encased one of yours as he listens to your staggering breaths that slowly becomes more faint than the last.
for the first time, no matter how tainted his hands were of from the numerous people he murdered in cold blood, sukuna finds himself praying; not for salvation or forgiveness but for your suffering to be placed onto him instead.
he has just found happiness with you, and in you, had just started to learn how to love someone so much that all his wicked ways were something he wished he never did. he had been stupid and arrogant – too arrogant. he was sure the heaven and whole generations of people he killed were now laughing at him drowning in his own misery. how the tables have turned on him and humbled him.
“kuna..” your barely audible voice mades him lean closer to your face, one of his large hands coming up to caress your face delicately.
“human. save your energy” sukuna scolds but his tone was not demanding by any means. it was desperate, desperate for just one more second of you.
a faint smile ghosts your almost now deathly pale face “it's not your fault.” you manage to cough out through staggering breaths.
sukuna's world might as well stop. it was his fault, everything was his fault. from the moment he caught a whiff of your sweet sweet blood to when he looked at you as nothing but prey to the moment when you became the sole reason for his existence, it was all his doing. he has taken you and tangled you amidst the string of despair.
his head shakes in denial, no words coming out of both his two mouths. so much to say, so many ways to say it but nothing.
but you know, the four pupils staring at you take the form of hearts, and that tells you everything. it could be just an illusion you'd heard people speak of on the verge of death but it's enough for you.
your sweet blood slowly looses its essence as you close your eyes, the last light inside you leisurely fading away.
“oi human” sukuna calls but there was no response.
“answer me” a plea.
still no answer as your hand slowly goes limp in his own. there was silence and nothing. so much of nothing that was unfamiliar in the otherwise air of curiousity that always surrounded you.
“human.” sukuna's voice wavers as his hands come to cup your too peaceful face. he searches for any signs of life but he finds none. before he knew it, a drop of water landed on your clueless yet beautiful features, then another and another.
the monster was crying. not just crying – he wept.
his entire body shakes as he lets out his pain, holding onto you desperately as if that would bring you back.
“human” he dries away his own tears on your face and brushes away the hair that dared hide even a portion of it.
“you're not a curse. you have never been. you were my blessing, my salvation. you are the best thing that have ever happened to me. you cleared my skies and showed me how it was to love… and be loved.”
sukuna trembled in grief at your loss. the king of curses– reduced to a man in love.
perhaps he wasn't the cannibal here. perhaps you were the one who slowly teared him apart and consumed his very being– merging yourself into his core without him even realising it.
but one thing he knows for sure is that if he were to do it again, he'd let himself be devoured entirely by you. over and over again. to be loved is to be consumed and he's offering himself to you, flesh and bones on a silver platter.
“until next time, my love.” he leans in and places a fragile kiss onto your forehead and that's the first and last time he has a taste of you.
with the last drop of your blood running dry and the absence of the warmth that made you, you; sukuna finds his answer – the reason why your blood tasted so sweet was because he was made to crave it. something he could quench his thirst with but never getting the chance to do so; a punishment perfectly fit for him.
“your deal. i shall agree to it on a condition” sukuna glowers at kamo who only smirks with an ‘i told you so’ written all over his face. sukuna would have slashed him to bits if it weren't for the agreement he agreed to take up on.
“i shall trade my soul to become a curse only if i get reincarnated exactly a thousand years from now” sukuna proposes, no, commands. it is said that a soul is reincarnated only once every thousand years and he wants to make sure he finds you in the next lifetime. maybe then, he'll have enough time with you and if he's lucky enough, be able to love you without bounds.
“that could be arranged” kamo quirks his head in a way sukuna despises. “but she'll have no memory of you. you're proceeding with this knowledge, yes?”
sukuna only narrows his eyes and ignores his question “that is not all. erase her existence from the minds of everyone besides me. generations hence, no one shall know who she is. her name shall be removed from every mouth that speaks of my reign.”
kamo smiles lazily “your soul is not worth that much sukuna”. the man strolls freely in the room, not minding the looming presence of the king of curses. “however, a binding vow could be arranged.”
great. another binding vow. but if that means he'll meet you in a thousand years time, he'll vow as many times as required.
“the grounds of the vow is as follows: you shall be reincarnated only if there appears a vessel suitable to withstand you.” kamo proposes. “your fingers will be cut and hidden in vast areas across the world and you shall only succeed in full reincarnation if you find them and consume them, all while being suppressed by the vessel.”
sukuna frowns and kamo only laughs “do you agree to the vow knowing all the risk it carries?”
conditions and regulations were a pain but nothing could stop a man desperate enough to give up his soul twice. “very well” sukuna agrees.
and that is how the heian era and sukuna's legacy came to an end; sealing himself – and the memories of you only he carries with him – into his twenty fingers, each of which turned into cursed objects scattered far and wide like pieces of puzzle waiting until the time comes for it to fit itself together again.
1K notes · View notes
moonlight-records · 29 days ago
Text
Rich Boys Don't Have Hearts I LN4 (Pt. II)
pairing: Jock!Lando Norris x Nerd!Reader
summary: Formula Ivy Academy, or FIA for short, is the most renowned private in the world who takes such a select few. Usually those from wealth with status and secrets and so much to lose. Yet, you are selected to join the FIA on a full scholarship. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain scares a lot students, especially their star athlete who will do anything to protect those he cares about. Though, he didn't expect you to have as much of a...bite to you for a little nobody.
warning: jealous!lando. also possessive lando again, ig. bestie!charles, MESSY!FRANCO!!! god it becomes SO messy!!! franco is so smooth too. mention of make out. mention of eating out & fingering (f receiving). um idk after, kinda dying like ferrari's strategy by not having it beta read
fc: none!
a/n: since everyone is asking!!! here’s a new part!!! also once again, i opened a ko-fi! feel free to show extra love 💕
wc: 4.5K
part 1 | current
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
“Has Lando’s attitude gotten any better since last week?”
“No.”
“Ha! Well, surely he’s been a bit better at practices, no?”
“That, he has. I think it’s because Max snapped at him and the coach backed Max up. Though he still gives me dirty glares during practice when he’s not speaking to me.” Charles shrugs, “though I am unbothered. I wasn’t the one who tried to bribe someone out of this school for people who don’t actually truly like me. Still baffles me that he did that considering how half the school talks poorly about him behind his back. Some are not as subtle as others.”
“Well, everyone has their reasons. Maybe he was more so worried about his friends. Max, Oscar, you—”
“I don't know if I would qualify as a friend anymore.”
“I would consider you a friend if I was Lando,” you admit with a small smile, “friends fight. That’s just the nature of any relationship, romantic or not. I bet he’ll let it go and muster up some apology for being such a dick to you.”
“And you.”
You let out a bitter laugh, “Lando apologize to me? My dear friend, are you sure you don’t smoke anything? Because that sounds like straight delusion. Did you find the delusion at the store? If so, did you get extra because I would love some.” You remark.
“Y/N. I’m serious here.”
“So am I, Charlie. Lando is never going to apologize to me for the shit he tried to pull on me last week.” You lean forward in your seat while making a face at the thought of Lando actually apologizing to you, “Him apologizing means that he was wrong and him admitting that he’s wrong is like hell freezing over or God admitting he was wrong to cast Lucifer out of heaven or like a guy actually knowing where the clit is or—”
“Y/N!” Charles almost shrieks before shuffling closer and murmuring, “you cannot just say things like that! You know how they are about language—”
“Oh bite me.” You groan softly while looking at Charles unimpressed, “The FIA only made that rule because Max was stupid enough to curse at his advisor. Though Marko totally deserved it, if you ask me. Besides.” You take a chance to look on either side of you before looking back at Charles, “we’re the only two here so I doubt anybody heard me. If they did, I think a lot of the girls would be agreeing with my statement and if it was faculty, I will happily take my community service hours because I am not apologizing for telling the truth.” You lean back in your seat with a shrug.
You watch Charles open and close his mouth as he tries to think of something to say and him growing increasingly frustrated because he really had nothing to say besides ‘you’re right, y/n’. You giggle seeing Charles huff and lean back in his chair, grumbling that “ you have some fair points.” You just nod before looking back down at all your notebook. You take a moment before tipping your laptop screen back as you go back to rewriting your notes as silence falls over you and Charles.
“I’ll be right back.” You tear your gaze away from your laptop looking at Charles who is gently pushing his books and laptop back onto the table. “I promised Arthur I would help him with piano and I have to meet him in ten minutes. I’ll be back soon,” Charles is rapidly telling you as he grabs his coat, hastily walking away. You stare, mouth a bit open before just accepting your fate and turning back around. Whatever, it’s fine.
You start finding your groove again as you see just a flash of color across from you. Still, you didn’t even acknowledge the other as you continued to take these notes down. You take a few more minutes to get through the section and let out a sigh of relief. That was one out of four, anyway. Leaning back, you rub your eyes and decide you can take a five minute break. Dropping your hands, you expect to see Charles sitting across from you once again. Instead, someone else sat in Charles' seat.
The universe just loves to test your patience. It has barely been a week since the incident with Lando that you had swore you were done. No more curly hair, greenish eyes, stupid contagious smile, friendly heartthrobs in your life. It was so oddly specific that you were certain the universe would listen but instead the universe decided to test you if you were really done since you now have curly hair, hazel green eyes, stupidly friendly and contagious smile sitting right across from you who was watching you with a gentle smile.
“Franco?”
“Y/N. There you are.” Franco leans forward and puts his elbows on the table, “Leave it to you to find the coolest hidden spot in the library.” He leans over to look at your laptop and then sits back down. “Are you rewriting notes? Gross. I am very sure you have an uh…” he pauses, “photographic memory. That is the word. You already know the things, please put the notes down and have social interactions?”
“Oh why thank you for thinking I have a photographic memory but I do in fact study a lot.” You giggle and feel a blush creep onto your face at the compliment. “I am having social interaction. Am I not talking to you?” You raise a brow at him smiling. “I can talk to you while rewriting my notes, you know.”
“Yes but I do not want you to do that but that means I only have half your attention,” Franco complains as he gently closes your laptop screen shut and grabs your hands. You look at Franco and feel your face turn as red as the school’s hoodie while looking at the other, “and that just will not do.” Franco brings your hand to cup his cheek while looking at you, “you’re always taking notes and talking. I want one hundred percent of your time. Just this once, please?”
You were not the universe’s strongest warrior. The way that Franco looked at you with those wide eyes and small pout. You had found yourself letting your resolve melt quickly as you gently shut your laptop, elbow on the table while resting your cheek against your palm. “Yeah,” you find yourself saying while smiling dreamily at your fellow classmate, “I can do that.”
“Wonderful!” Franco praises as he leans back slightly. “Now, where were we last time we talked?” Franco thinks trying to recall, “I think we were talking about Hamilton—”
“And Toto,” you add on with a grin.
“Right, right,” Franco nods while glancing around before leaning in slightly. “I’m going fucking insane. They have Hamilton coming in as the guest designer for the fashion students this year and they moved the fashion kids into the arts building after that fire. Which means,” Franco grumbles, “I have the fortunate bad luck of seeing Lewis four times a week almost all day.”
“Why is that bad? He’s like your biggest celebrity crush.”
“That’s the thing!” Franco hisses, “He’s a celebrity crush. A crush that was never to see my existence or anything. Now instead of kilometers separating us, it’s just one floor! You think a man that is perfect should be looking at someone like me?” Franco looks at you, horrified, “Y/N. Please. I’ve never been so stressed over my looks before going to class. I don’t know how much longer my fragile heart can take seeing Lewis in all his glorious outfits with all those lovely rings…and tattoos…and stay sane.” Franco drops his head in defeat before looking back up at you. “Well, what about you? How’s your celebrity crush on Toto?”
You sigh and look away defeated. “Sadly, he is no longer a celebrity crush. He’s…” You cover your mouth as you take a moment. You close your eyes before taking a deep breath in and out. “Toto Wolff is…off the roster,” you whisper dramatically while looking at Franco. Franco gasps loudly, covering his mouth.
“What?! Say it ain’t so! Toto Wolff has been on the roster since the day we created the rosters,” Franco stares in disbelief, “What happened? What did he do that was so…dirty that you had to take him off the roster completely.
You stare at Franco before looking away, shaking your head slightly. “He did the one thing that I was terrified of. The only thing that would have me kick a man such as Toto Wolff off the damn roster…he became a full time professor here.” You finally admit, covering your mouth again in disbelief that your worst nightmare came true. You hear Franco gasp again and you nod, “I know. It’s such a sad day. We lost one of our strongest.”
“Here lies Toto Wolff. That man saw the rise of your beautifully curated roster. A moment of silence for our beloved.” Franco whispers as he sits there with you. You two glance at each other and you two break out into laughter. You both lean in, giggling while trying to hush the other so you two don’t get in trouble for being so loud. “Though seriously, he became a full time professor here? Good for him but that truly is a shame. We got new eye candy but at what cost?”
“I know! But hey, at least his teaching style is unique so at least I am very engaged which is really a good thing plus him looking as hot as he does since he’s a psychopath. Who the hell has classes at eight in the morning? I can’t even be happy that it’s once a week because it’s a three hour class that starts promptly at eight in the morning on Monday. Maybe it is a good thing Toto became a professor because this is too much.”
Franco’s been laughing silently the entire time, silently getting more dramatic as you spoke so he wouldn’t scream in the middle of the library. You watch him for a moment before laughing as well, grabbing onto his arms as the two of you laugh.
You two calm down and lean back as someone clears their throat. The two of you look up and your face falls to horror when cold stormy green eyes land on you. You shift uncomfortably as you become defensive. Shoulder a bit further back. Back a bit straighter. Chin a bit higher. You force a smile at the British student while trying to explode him with your mind.
“Y/N.” Lando remarks while looking down at you with pure raging dislike, “Funny seeing you here.”
“I could say the same for you.”
“Ha.” Lando looks at Franco and relaxes slightly. “Dude. Come on. I’ve been looking for you for the past ten minutes, we have to grab Oscar before meeting up with Max and Carlos soon. I really don’t need Carlos getting on me for being late.”
“Oh sorry. I just got so distracted.” Franco tells Lando and stands.
“What were you even doing? Speaking to Y/N?” You glare at Lando. Franco is way too sweet to be dragged into your bullshit with Lando before looking back at Franco. It seems that the Brit has a soft spot for your fellow freshman or something because Lando clears his throat before he keeps speaking, “I didn’t realize you two knew each other. Didn’t mean to sound so rude…sorry.”
Holy shit. Did hell finally freeze over? Maybe it’s pigs flying. Or he’s finally getting laid. It really doesn’t matter the reason why right now because you were still in disbelief that Lando apologized. You never thought you’d live to see the day where Lando apologized in general but apologizing because of the rude tone he had when speaking about you? Did you end up in the Twilight Zone? No no this must be a joke. Okay, cut the cameras. Seriously the cameras can STOP rolling.
“Oh of course I know Y/N! We’re in the same graduating class and we have a few gen eds together. It’s just hard given our schedules but,” Franco grins, “We make it work. Though! Before I leave I actually want to know if you’d be interested in grabbing lunch with me tomorrow” Franco announces as he looks at you, smiling, “could be a date if you want?”
Suddenly the world just freezes and you’re stuck at the library table staring in complete shock at the turn of the events. You hadn’t even told Franco about Lando, not having the heart for his poor heart to be crushed by how Lando could be so nasty. Still, you’re trying to figure out how the hell this conversation got onto the topic of Franco asking you out on a date.
In the heat of the moment, you can’t help but turn to look at Lando as if he heard Franco correctly. Maybe you’ve just fallen asleep and this is some weird dream or something. You come to the shocking yet unsuspecting realization that this is not a dream when Lando meets your gaze having the same idea. You both look back at Franco in a state of shock and confusion. “A date?” You and Lando ask in union.
“Yes.” Franco laughs and smiles widely at you and Lando before looking back at you, “well? Would you like to get lunch with me? As a date?”
“Yes.” You smile while nodding, “I would love to get lunch with you as a date.”
You stare at Franco with a stupid smile. You hadn’t expected this was how your evening would go but you were more than happy about it. You were so happy, that Lando’s look of shock turned to disgust didn’t even phase you. Finally, you’re crashing back to reality when Lando annoyingly clears his throat while looking down at the two of you. “Well, lovebirds,” Lando forces a smile but you can feel the burn his venomous words carry, “sorry to cut the moment short but we really have to leave now, Franco.” Lando manages through gritted teeth.
“Right! Sorry again.” Franco gathers his things and looks at you, “I’ll text you later. Bye Y/N,” Franco waves before Lando sends him off, telling him he’ll be right out.
You watch Franco go off and sigh dreamily. You glance away for a moment before doing a double take. Your smile morphs into a scowl while looking at Lando who—hasn’t moved yet. Looking him up and down, you raise a brow. “Can I help you?”
“Why did you say yes to Franco?”
“You really think you’re entitled to that after the shit you pulled last week?” You raise a brow while clicking your tongue, “besides. Why do you even care?”
“Because Franco’s a freshman and I don’t need him distracted,” Lando snaps and you roll your eyes. Here he goes again about distractions and shit. Lando glances away and huffs. “Also because he’s a bit of a player.”
“Takes one to know one, yeah?”
Lando glares at you and sneers slightly. “So what? I wouldn’t want him wasting any of his time on you.”
“Why?”
“You’d probably bore him to death.” Looking down at you as Lando gives it a beat. “Also I doubt you’d know how to get him off for your first time. Hell, I don’t think you’d know how to get anybody off. Not even yourself.” Giving you a condescending smile, “I would hate for him to be a part of your body count.”
“Oh.” You laugh slightly, “That’s adorable. Well. You know what? I think we got off on the wrong foot.”
Lando’s a bit taken aback. “I—what?”
“You know. I’ve been doing some thinking. I think we didn’t quite see eye-to-eye.” You continue as you pack your things. “Which isn’t really fair because you were truly just looking out for your friends. Like you’re doing right now.” Standing straight, “which I just wanna say is the sweetest thing ever so. I want to thank you and I’ve figured out the best way to do that.”
“…Which is…?” Lando leans in slightly, waiting for your answer.
“Which is…letting you know in great detail not only how good Franco’s gonna fuck me this weekend but you’ll also have to listen how Franco’s not going to want anybody else when I’m done with him.” You feign innocence to Lando as you sling your backpack over your shoulders before walking away.
Tumblr media
“Now, don’t you move a single muscle,” Franco kisses your forehead with a smile “You just focus on resting and I’ll handle everything for dinner tonight, okay?”
“Uh huh.”
“Good girl.” Franco winks before leaving your dorm. 
You lay in your bed staring where Franco had just left before rolling over, grunting as your legs failed to work with you. Fumbling around the messy sheets and pillows till you find your phone and immediately open the texts messages because you had to tell someone about the date you just had:
A MINX. HE’S A MINX I TELL YOU. - YN
WHO? WHAT? THE FUCK IS HAPPENING??? - CL
FRANCO. FRANCO IS NOTHING MORE THAN A MINX!!!!-YN
??????-CL
So Franco asked me out on a date for lunch today—YN
HE WHAT?! WHEN?-YN
Yesterday after you disappeared. He showed up and Lando came looking for him.-YN
LANDO? WHAT? Oh my god was he nasty to you? I’ll hurt him istg-CL
No. No he was…civil. Or civilish while Franco was around. But anyway, yeah Lando was asking like why Franco was talking to me cause we don’t really talk and like they had to go to Max’s place and Franco was like “oh we’re in the same graduating class” and stuff but before he left he was like “oh do you wanna get lunch with me tomorrow as a date?'“-YN
And I was gagged! I thought it heard it wrong so I looked at Lando who was LOOKING AT ME THE SAME WAY so we realize oh this is real. This is happening and Franco wants to grab lunch with me like a date. So I say yes, obviously.-YN
IN FRONT OF LANDO!?-CL
Yeah cause fuck him!!! If my happiness is his kryptonite to having a good day, then so fucking be it. But wait!! There’s more!-YN
TELL ME! TELL ME!-CL
So Lando hangs behind and Franco leaves. Then Lando looks at me all like “why’d you say yes?” Bitch what do you mean???-YN
Oh my god, he did not!!-CL
He totally did!!!-YN
Ew. Why does it have a jealous undertone?? possessiveness???-CL
It’s giving ‘you belong to me’ or like ‘nobody else can have you because I want you’ like some dark romance MMC. This is not a bully romance with a mafia subplot or some shit!!-YN
PREACH 👏👏👏. So what happened after?!-CL
Oh so I was like “i’m not telling you after the shit you pulled last week” and asking why he cares and he’s going on about how Franco’s a freshman and he can’t get distracted and how he’s a bit of a player, which he isn’t he’s just kind of a himbo, and I was like “oh takes one to know one, yeah?”-YN
YOU DID NOT. SHUT UP OH Y/N I LOVE YOU SO MUCH-CL
I did and that pissed Lando off. He starts going on about how I don’t know how to get anybody off and I’d bore Franco to death and how he would never want Franco a part of my body count. First off I got three bodies and I have pleased all three, thank you very much but also like fuck Lando!! His opinion? Doesn’t matter!! So I started bout how ‘oh we got off on the wrong foot’ and ‘you’re right’ to throw him for a loop before I told him I wanted to ‘thank him’ for ‘opening my eyes’ and his thank you is listening, in great detail, to Franco fuck me this entire weekend and then listening to Franco wanting nobody else ��-YN
YNNNN!!! OH MY GOOOOOD I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!! Ugh yes that’s some queen shit. Though how does that tie into Franco being a minx??-CL
BECAUSE. It’s Friday. He has no classes. Mine got canceled so I decided, oh why don’t we stay in today, right? soooo like, we go to the cafe, i get food (that Franco paid for) cause he’s not hungry right now which is whatever, and then we head back to my dorm. We’re watching tv, we’re talking, and I finish eating. It’s great, right??-YN
Yes, correct.-CL
So as I’m talking, I start talking about Lando. Franco’s apologizing, I’m telling him he shouldn’t be apologizing. He’s asking if he should stop hanging out with Lando and you know me. I’m not gonna police people on their friends so I told him no. As long as he holds Lando accountable, then I don’t care. If Franco wants to drop Lando that’s his own doing.-YN
Anyway, we keep talking and laughing. We’re getting closer. And then…you know-YN
…What happened? 👀👀-CL
We start kissing. Then it turns into a lazy makeout. Hands start wandering, nothing real scandalous ya know?-YN
Uh huh…-CL
Then this mf pulls away and is like “Oh, I’m real hungry”-YN
FRANCO!!! WTFF!!!!-CL
OH WAIT!! Cause that’s what I thought. I was like “Oh really? Like now? I mean I guess we can go back to the cafe.” Meanwhile he’s actively getting off the bed. Then Franco pulls me by my ankles to the edge of the bed. so i'm thinking he’s really hungry so I go to sit up and he pushes me back down talking bout some “where’re you going mami?”-YN
SIR?? EXCUSE ME??? I can hear the accent now, oh my god that’s—wow-CL
OH BUT WAIT. THERE’S MORE!!!-YN
So first, don’t be calling me mami unless you plan on making me an actual mom. Second, I’m looking at him confused like “you said you were hungry” and he’s like “yeah?” and I was like “Oh I’m sorry, I just thought you’d want me to join you going to the cafe to get lunch” and he’s looking at me like I got ten heads before going like “the cafe? Why would we go to the cafe?” He’s actively like leaning over me while holding my thighs and slowly pushing them opening talking bout “I don’t need the cafe when I got a full five meal course right here sprawled out in front of me.”-YN
FRANCO!?! OH MY GOD—I have to fan myself. Wow that was—🥵🥵🥵🥵-CL
RIGHT?!?!-YN
WELL??-CL
…Charles when I tell you. I do not believe in god but I am pretty sure I was knocking on his door. Two hours. I was seeing god for TWO HOURS!!! Charles when I tell you that man had me screaming crying throwing up I MEAN IT. Charles, I'm still in bed. My legs are still shaking. I can’t feel them.-YN
What I wouldn’t give to be sucked off like that—CL
But wait. There’s a cherry on top of all of this.-YN
WHAT COULD TOP THIS?-CL
Franco really had to make sure everyone knew what was happening. I mean, he’s on his knee with my hips hanging off. He’s got one hand gripping my ass like it’s his lifeline to this world. He’s between my thighs and eating me out like he is a man up next on death row and I am his final fucking meal. He pushed all the pillows away. Got my wrists pinned to my stomach with his other hand. I am solely at his mercy and I cannot keep quiet for the life of me and he ate it up. I was so loud, I heard banging from upstairs.-YN
Banging?-CL
Yeah. Like someone was hitting a broom against the floor. To signal to shut up, which Franco and I ignored. More Franco than me, I couldn’t see straight and that was an hour in. Do you know, what the banging was though???-YN
A disgruntled upstairs neighbor???-CL
Yeah. Do you remember who my upstairs neighbor is?-YN
…OH MY FUCKING GOD, LANDO LISTENED TO YOU GETTING THE BEST HEAD OF YOUR LIFE?-CL
Yes SIIIIIIIIRRRRRR. Dude Lando got so mad he CALLED Franco in the middle of it and he answered.-YN
HE ANSWERED?!-CL
Yes. He answered. Pulls back enough to start fingering me and hands be a pillow telling me to bite down on it which I do without a second fucking thought. But tell me why Franco put Lando on speaker and Lando asking “what are you doing right now??” and Franco looks me dead in the fucking eyes going on bout “Oh I’m just having lunch right now with Y/N.” and Lando’s like “oh yeah? Is that so? Then why the fuck is she screaming so god damn loud? Huh? Thought it was a lunch date?” and Charles. I shit you the fuck NOT, Franco without missing a beat goes, “It is. She’s my lunch and my mother always told me to finish everything on my plate and I plan to do just that.” THEN HUNG UP THE PHONE AND WENT RIGHT BACK TO EATING ME OUT.-YN
Y/N…you are the luckiest bitch around. Holy fucking shit. I need a man like Franco—do we know if Franco swings both ways??-CL
He does. Though you might not like him. He’s got a huge crush on Lewis—YN
Never mind. You keep Franco. Gives me an easier chance to steal Lewis' heart. Or just get one chance with him.-CL
I think you can do it. I believe. Anyway, yeah so that happened and—YN
You accidentally send your message to Charles early when a new text comes through. It’s by an unknown number and you click on it.
Lacrosse field. 8pm. We need to talk.-Unk
You think for a moment trying to figure out who this could be. No names come to your mind so you think that someone texted the wrong number. Typically, you’d leave unknown numbers alone but you got the impression that this was something important and urgent that you respond.
Oh I’m sorry, you have the wrong number-YN
I don’t-Unk
Excuse me?-YN
You look up hearing the familiar broom hitting against the floor. You scowl at Lando and his antics before looking back at your phone. Huh. That was…too coincidental. You lay there for a moment before the banging came again, this time a bit more urgent. You send your message before realizing it.
Lando?-YN
The banging stops. Suddenly, your dorm is eerily quiet and you hold your breath. You watch the familiar three bubbles appear and disappear before appearing again as your heart sinks.
Bingo. 8pm. Tonight. Lacrosse field. Alone.-LN
Tumblr media
tag list: @dripostsstuff, @tinyhrry, @formulaho, @green--beanie, @brekkers-whore.
@fat-meh, @landossainz, @jaydensluv, @carpediem241108, @rayaharper,
@bookishnerd1132, @asmoothoperator, @loloekie, @kawaiifurychaos
@st0rmzi3, @tygecjjd, @eclipsedcherry, @linnygirl09, @ln4-cl16-world
@poppymelonz, @katiascraft, @fangirl125reader, @taliya8346282844eliviahdgdajs, @norrisleclercf1
661 notes · View notes
morallygreychaoticneutral · 23 days ago
Text
Astarion prefers monogamy.
Again, simply my cup of thought tea steeped from my game experience. Its not everyone's drink. No shame, no blame, it's your game. Warning for triggers and spoilers.
Tumblr media
*added note due to misunderstandings.
Please notice I said "prefers monogamy" not "is monogamous". He may be up for added partners later on down the line. But definitely not any time before the epilogue in my world.
So, why do I think he prefers monogamy?
Take..
"Iv never had anyone. Not really. Nothing that compares to you."
And mix that with...
"I had nothing for so very long. NOTHING! Not even my own body!"
And add..
"You're you. Nobody is like that."
Plus countless other comments and actions and you get a bowl full of elf who just wants something for himself only for a change.
Centuries of being forced to give up or share everything. His possessions, his person, his own thoughts. Nothing to claim as own that no one else could take or touch at any moment. I'm sure if anything was given to him, he had to fight to keep it.
I think, he would be a bit possessive of anything he could claim as his own.
You are a gift to him. Something rare and special beyond words. I highly doubt he would be willing to share anything you are sharing with him outside of friendship. I could even see him getting fussy about strangers touching you. Moving you away or putting himself physically between you and whomever just touched you without asking.
Hells, even ascended Astarion isn't 100% game to share.
"As much as I wish to sequester you in a deep chamber of my palace and keep you all to myself...there is much to be done."
But, what about Halsin? He says he's fine with it.
Is he? Or is he people pleasing?
If he had said something along the lines of,
"Oh? He wants to share does he? Of course he does. I'm not up for such activities just yet, but you are free to have as much Halsin as you wish. "
I would have gone on that bear hunt, but he doesn't.
He askes you if you are wanting to sleep with Halsin because he has not been able to meet your sexual needs. And I interpreted that as he's vulnerable and worried he's being replaced for not putting out.
Imagine you had asked your lover to not to look to you for sex for reasons you are working out. They agree and you are just relieved as hell about it.
"You were patient. You cared."
Then they come along later down the line and say they are thinking about having sex with a friend. Where would your mind go?
I would bet hard gold he weighed the options in his head. "If I don't let them do this, they might leave me for good. But if I allow it, they wont have an immediate reason to leave. Halsin is the safest option given his experience."
And what's the best way to feel less awful about a situation we cant control? Create a counter situation where we gaslight ourselves into thinking its fine.
Wheeee!
I'm not saying Halsin's offer was bad, it was perfectly fine, it was just poorly placed in the grand scheme of things. If you and Astarion were having fun again before he suggested being an extra, then it would have been easier to believe he was really fine with it.
If they wanted Astarion to be a poly partner they needed to write it better. Shadowheart makes more sense as pro poly than he does.
So for me, Astarion is a one on one elf.
I am not against polyamory. I am not trying to take representation away. I am not shaming anybody for their choices. There is just not enough specific content to support it fully FOR ME. I was actually excited at the idea of having two partners in my fantasy world. Halsin was very clear and very specific about being on board. Astarion was not. And the choice did not feel right. Add a line somewhere for Astarion where he says "Im perfectly fine with sharing, darling. As long as it is discussed and we are in agreement of course." I will happily be on board with it.
319 notes · View notes
cutielando · 7 months ago
Note
Can we have a Lando x reader who's a little chubby?
chubby | l.n.
warnings!!: reader is described as being chubby, self-consciousness
my masterlist
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
You hadn’t always had doubts regarding the way you looked.
Seeing so many models around you at every step, feeling the eyes burning into the back of your neck and scrutinizing you for simply the way you looked. But you never cared about any of that.
You weren’t ugly, far from it. You were as beautiful as they come, but slightly a little chubby. You had some meat on your thighs and you weren’t afraid to show it off or feel confident in your body.
Well, that was before.
Ever since you started dating Lando, everything changed.
The amount of eyes that were on you before was nothing compared to the moment when you were introduced to the world as Lando’s girlfriend.
You had decided to keep your relationship a secret for the first couple of months, just until you tested out the waters and figured out what would come of the whole thing. You had tried to limit your expectations from the very beginning, knowing that Lando could leave you for anyone and nobody would ever know.
But it didn’t happen, and you were sure that what you had was real after months and months of expecting the worst.
After many talks, both you and Lando decided that it would be best for you to attend the Silverstone Grand Prix as your first official race as his girlfriend. It was his home Grand Prix, at the end of the way, he wanted you there with his family, and he wouldn’t take no for an answer.
“Are you sure you want me to come? I can stay back, I don’t mind” you said as you were waiting for Lando to finish getting ready so you could all leave for the track.
He looked at you, blankly staring at you. You’d had the same conversation 10 times since you guys woke up, and he didn’t know how to stress it well enough that he wanted you there with him.
“Baby, I don’t know how else to say this. I want you there with me, my family wants you there as well. Why are you so nervous?” he was holding your arms, softly running his finger up and down your soft skin.
You had the answer, but you didn’t want to give it to him. You already knew what he was going to say and how he was going to react, but you couldn’t lie to him when he looked at you with those eyes of his that stared deep into your soul.
“I know what people are going to say when they see you with me” you mumbled, staring down at your shoes.
Lando frowned, not understanding what his fans had to do with anything. Why would you care about what his fans would say? He didn’t, why would you?
“What do you mean?” he asked, bringing you closer to his body.
You sighed against his chest, wrapping your arms around his waist loosely.
“People are going to say things when they see you with me” your voice was small, unsure of your own words.
Lando’s eyebrows furrowed, confused as to what you meant. But he didn’t say anything when you sighed, letting you get everything off of your chest.
“I don’t look like the girls you are usually seen with, and people noticed that. They always have something to say about the way I look next to you and that I’m not like your exes and that you don’t really like me and are using me for clout. I know it’s not true, but sometimes they get to me” you confessed, a weight slowly lifting off of your conscience.
You weren’t used to being in the public eye as much as Lando, so you’d never before had to deal with people commenting about your appearance and judging every single thing you did or said.
It was something you took a while getting used to, but it was worth it if it meant being with Lando. And Lando was very grateful for all the sacrifices you had made for him.
“Baby, look at me” he said, taking your face in his hands so you would look him in the eyes. “I don’t care what anybody has to say about you. I love you for who you are, just the way you are. You’re gorgeous in my eyes and nobody could ever convince me otherwise” he said, speaking slowly so you could absorb his words carefully.
You looked at him, biting your lip as you studied his face and especially his eyes. They were sincere, holding more honesty and love than you thought you could ever comprehend.
“You mean that?” you whispered, feeling hot tears building into the corners of your eyes.
Lando smiled and leaned down, kissing you deeply. “I love you, and I don’t care what anyone has to say about us. We’re happy, nobody else matters”
You bit your lip again but nodded, prompting a big smile to break out on Lando’s face.
“Then let’s rock Silverstone”
♡♡♡♡♡
The paddock was buzzing when you arrived with Lando and his family. Dozens of fans were screaming your boyfriend’s name, and even though he smiled and waved at them while keeping his distance, you could tell his smile was not 100% honest.
You tried not to look at his fans if you could help it, knowing you would be met with some looks you’d be better off not seeing. Lando saw that, and he only wrapped his arm around your shoulders to keep you even closer as you made your way together to the garage.
“How are you feeling?” Lando asked once you were in the safety of his driver’s room, away from the screaming fans and photographers.
You smiled, your heart warming at the fact that his most pressing concern, even on the toughest race weekends, was you.
“I’m okay, you don’t have to worry about me” you reassured him, smiling lightly.
He looked at you for a moment, studying your face and eyes intently. He didn’t like knowing that his fans were not supportive of his relationship and of you in particular, he thought it was absolutely ridiculous.
“I just want to make sure you’re comfortable being here” he said, sighing before pulling you into a hug.
“I’ve known from the beginning that being in the public eye wouldn’t always be sunshine and roses. This is just an example of that, we can’t control it. People are allowed to have opinions, I just have to learn how to deal with them” you said, enjoying the warmth emanating from his body.
Lando nodded, but still felt like he should make it clear how wrong everybody else was about you.
He pulled away from the hug, only to take your face in his hands. “I want you to know that, no matter what anyone might say, I love you just the way you are. I don’t care if you’re skinny, if you’re a little chubby, if you have short or long hair, I care about you in any form. I love you for who you are, not for the way you look” he said, making tears well up in the corners of your eyes.
You had always known Lando loved you, but this right there proved it to you 1000 times over.
Not being able to resist, you practically threw yourself against his body, kissing him so fiercely you both became lightheaded. Pouring every ounce of love you felt for one another into a kiss, sealing a promise that you would always be there to lift each other up, no matter what.
Why?
Because nothing else mattered besides you two.
Tumblr media
comments and re-blogs help us grow!
much appreciated!!
REQUEST HERE
560 notes · View notes
teencopandthesourwolf · 1 year ago
Text
He freezes. Doesn't know what the hell else to do. 
He can't picture it: Derek can't remember the last time somebody put their arms around him. 
Was it Laura?
Of course it was Laura. How could he forget that? Derek has gotten pretty good at blocking things out—a little too good, it seems.
She didn't tell him anything before leaving New York. Didn't say a fucking word, just up and vanished. Derek had woken up one morning and she was gone, because she'd known without a shadow of a doubt that Derek would've only followed her if she'd have said a single word to him.
Nobody ever granted Derek’s wishes, no matter who he prayed to. Those desperate pleas where he asked to go back and get a chance to fix things, they all went unheard.
Laura left to go back to the place they both wished still existed just as it had; a place they were wanted alive, not dead. It wasn't fair that it was the very same place they would be hunted down if they did return, like the rabid animals the Argent's presumed they were.
Leaving the way they did meant they hadn't gotten the chance to see if anything was left at the house. They couldn't even mark graves, and grieve properly. 
That same place also happened to be the place they'd been born, the place they'd grown up and called home.
Derek had never wanted Laura to face all of that alone.
The burnt down house. The nothing where there was once everything.
The thought still haunts him. One of so many. 
Beacon Hills is home—but it's the home Derek had helped raze to the ground with his selfishness and stupidity. Everything he and Laura had ever known, everyone they'd ever loved, it was all gone, now. Derek had taken those things away from his sister and hadn't even had the guts to tell her. Tell Laura they were all gone because of him, tell her that everything that had happened to their family, to them, was all his fault.
In the aftermath of the fire Laura hugged Derek, and had kept hugging him, over and over in those weeks and months and years that followed. She would pull him into her arms hold him tight, whenever she could sense it was all getting to be too much for him again.
Alpha.
Big sister.
But Laura only knew about some of the reasons why it sometimes felt like too much effort for Derek to keep on breathing.
He never told her about Kate.
And Derek, the fucking coward, he'd allowed Laura to hold him, feeling the flames of shame on his cheeks every time, hot as those that took the lives of his parents. His family. His pack. 
Now, he remembers that last time. 
“I'm going out.” 
Laura stood up, walked around the two mismatched armchairs and stopped him by throwing both her arms around his neck, pulling him into her and hugging him, scenting him. 
It always took him a moment to respond these days, but Derek hugged her back. 
“What's this for?”
“You. Because I know whomever's bed you end up in tonight, you won't be asking for one of these.”
Oh, fuck no. Derek couldn't handle that. Did she think he was out sleeping with people? Never again, not after…
He pushed his sister off him, gently; a stark contrast to the harsh words that followed. 
“Don't fucking coddle me. And fuck you, Laura—I don't sleep in anybody's bed but my own.” A single mattress on the floor of the lounge of their shitty one bedroom apartment. Derek had so many shameful memories, and crawling into his sister's bed every night for the first year after the fire was one of them. “Just—leave me alone.”
Laura was the one—the only—person Derek had left in the entire world, yet his guilt was constantly pushing her away. 
“Where do you go to, little brother? You might not be clinging to me anymore, night after night, nightmare after nightmare, but you're rarely in your own bed most mornings.”
She hadn't meant it as a dig. Derek knew that. She was his sister, and she loved him.
Maybe she thought he was making progress? Seeing people. Moving on.
Derek spent his nights waiting outside of dive bars, and hanging around in back alleys and dark places, desperate to find scumbags to taunt who were big enough and hard enough to at least attempt to kick the living shit out of him.
Derek hated being a werewolf, now. He wanted to get hurt and stay hurt.
“Just—out.”
Then Derek turned his back on Laura, leaving her to stand there and watch him walk away as he left her to go out looking for a fight, without looking back. 
That was the last time somebody put their arms around Derek—and the last time he saw his sister alive.
It was two years ago. Derek doesn’t think he has taken a full breath, since. 
Now here he is—standing in his stupid big loft that he bought for his betas, yet another pack he managed to destroy—having given away more than he should, with skinny yet strong arms wrapping as far around his shoulders as they'll reach. 
Stiles.
“You don't have to hug back. But you can, if you want to. I won't tell,” the kid jokes. It's his way to connect, his connection to the world. A coping mechanism, Derek thinks.
He knows all about those.
“I…” he doesn't have the first fucking clue of how to handle this. Or how to admit he needs it—to himself, let alone somebody else. He doesn't know how to admit that he wants it. 
But this is Stiles. The one person in Derek's life who seems, for some unfathomable reason, to give a fuck about Derek. To care about him.
Slowly, very slowly, Derek lifts an arm and awkwardly rests a hand on Stiles's upper back, feels the muscles jump slightly under the kid's baggy clothes as he tentatively spreads his fingers and finds the back of Stiles's neck. 
Stiles's voice hitches just a touch as he says, “These can be on tap, you know. If you want them. Stilinski hugs are the best hugs, dude. Believe.”
And Derek finds he does believe. For the first time in forever, Derek believes there could be something good in his life again.
More confidently, now, he brings his other arm up to wrap around Stiles's waist and hugs Stiles tighter, properly, and allows himself to be hugged back.
Derek wonders how he has gone so long without this kind of closeness. Lived without this kindness.
He decides to let the 'dude' pass. Because maybe—maybe it wouldn't be so bad after all, to be somebody's dude? 
Stiles's dude.
It's a fucking ridiculous moniker and yet Derek suddenly couldn't care less. 
“I think I'd like that,” he whispers into the forbidden place where Stiles's jaw meets long, pale neck. "Dude."
Derek can feel Stiles's smile as the kid squeezes him harder. And, ironically, Derek feels as if he can breathe again. 
.
for @greyhavenisback bc i want to hug you in person and can't <3 (unedited, forgive me!)
903 notes · View notes
roosterforme · 3 months ago
Note
Does Jake ever have nightmares about a mission or his air-to-air kills in the Mr. Right Now Universe? If so, how do you think it goes the first time he has them when Darlin' is around?
Tumblr media
Jake keeps his job pretty well separated from his personal life, but there definitely comes a time when the two can't help but overlap. Naval fighter pilots have it rough when it comes to having a career that is relatable to their partner, but Darlin' always pays attention to what he says. She also knows his moods. I can imagine him returning from a mission where he has a hard time disengaging... (long and angsty ahead)
He was going through the motions. Ever since you picked him up four days ago, Jake was with you, but he still seemed so far away. You thought having him back home again would make everything better, but you found yourself constantly swallowing down a lump of apprehension when you were with him.
"Do you want more pizza?" you asked, watching the way his green eyes shifted from a faraway gaze to focus on your face.
"Yeah," he grunted, accepting the slice without another word.
He wasn't making fun of your pizza. He barely commented on the movie that he insisted he wanted to watch. Even the way he treated you in bed felt off. It was confusing, and you hated the way you were doubting yourself. Originally you thought he just needed some sleep and good food, but he was barely saying a word to you right now.
Tears burned your eyelids as you got to your feet. "Are you not happy to see me?" you asked, voice harsh and raspy.
"What?" he asked, looking up at you, finally focusing on what you were saying.
You held your arms out at your sides. "I missed you, Jake. I missed you for weeks and weeks. I poured my heart out in love letters that I sent to you, but now that you're back, it's like you're still on the aircraft carrier."
He rubbed his hands over his face, a weariness falling into place that made him seem older somehow. "Darlin'," he started, but then he went silent again.
As much as you didn't want to say it, you had to. "Did you meet someone else?"
Images of an older, more sophisticated woman filled your brain even as Jake jumped to his feet. "No! Of course not!"
His arms were around you as you started to cry in confusion. "Then why are you so quiet? Why won't you talk to me?"
"Fuck," he muttered under his breath. "Darlin', there's nobody else. I swear. I'm just having a hard time processing things."
"What things?" you asked softly, looking up at him. When he hesitated again, you led him to the living room couch and got him snuggled beneath the fleece blanket with you. Then you turned off the lamp and ran your fingers through his hair until he was ready to talk.
"You know, I guess I'm supposed to be thrilled that I have five air-to-air kills now," he whispered, voice low and filled with sadness. "It's supposed to mean something when you're an ace. But I haven't really slept in two weeks, because I can't stop thinking about it."
"Jake," you murmured, kissing his forehead even as his arm tightened around you. "That's a lot to process. We can talk about it if you want to."
You could already feel some of the tension easing away as he whispered, "I already feel a lot better just saying it outloud to you." He let you kiss him slowly all over his face as he said, "There's nobody else. There's not going to be anybody else. I promise I'm here, Darlin'. I'm just so tired, and I can't seem to shut down and just sleep."
Without another word, you rubbed circles along his shoulder with your thumb. Soon his breathing evened out, and he was asleep. You would let him sleep as long as he could.
197 notes · View notes
kalimarinus · 7 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
offerings from the unnamed.
[ summary : a mystery person is leaving gifts for 141? ]
[ relationships : tf141 x gn!reader (platonic) ]
[ warnings : 3rd person & 2nd-ish pov , gn reader 🤍 , use of y/n (your name) & c/n (codename/callsign) , unedited & not proofread , i know nothing about the military once again ]
[ word count : 2,392 ]
[ notes : back after another long while , yeah!!! this was fun <3 i can't believe this is 2k words what ?!@?!>@/ that's longer than my previous fic & this was just like a spitball idk..., also the 141 might just have memory loss why is everyone forgetting everything!! (y'all idk why i got so into it w gaz and price's section like why is it so long and soap and ghost's are so short???. but more the merrier, right...?) ]
Tumblr media
John Price:
he was pretty surprised at first, he did not expect to see a bouquet of roses on his desk. though, he doesn't question it? 
—until he walks up closer to examine the flowers, just to see a little tag with a note on it that reads: 'for my favorite captain. -a/n.'
now he's a little confused. could it be one of his sergeants? his lieutenant? hell, it could be so many other people.
the only hint is the handwriting. he swears he can recognize it. 
but suddenly price reminds himself he actually has work, so never mind the flowers, for now, he needs to get back to doing his paperwork and such. 
as he works away and whatnot, the thought of the roses is lingering in the back of his mind and slowly creeping up to the front, and he can't seem to ignore the questions.
"why roses?" "whose handwriting is that? i swear i know it." "for me? why not anybody else?"
he's utterly perplexed at this point, so he quickly finishes up whatever he needs to do and turns to the bouquet he left sitting on the other side of the desk long ago.
after many, many minutes of just trying to grasp the mysterious person whose handwriting looks the same as on the tag, he gives up.
gives up on trying to figure out this anonymous roses bullshit by himself, anyway. the captain goes to his two closest buddies, unsurprisingly nikolai and laswell.
he questions them, he tells them everything. to the point he walked through the door and saw the bouquet and to the point where he was now asking them for 'help'. but it just ends up being just a lot more questions and inevitably no answers.
he goes to his lieutenant. his two sergeants. nothing.
now he gives up fully. nobody knows anything about this or who it might be. not him, his best friends, or his own task force.
time passes quickly until it's the end of the day (and he's surprised he's almost spent hours trying to figure this puzzling gift out), and he's trying to come to terms with this.
'it's intended to be anonymous, he shouldn't be trying to figure this out, and he shouldn't lose sleep over this.' is what he tells himself when he gets back to his barracks.
he looks down at the mysterious bouquet in his hand that never had left him alone since he'd come across it, like a fungus that had grown on a damp and and won't let go, and he lets out a sigh.
but john supposes he doesn't mind keeping it. if it really is someone he's friends with (which he's sure), he shouldn't just throw it away. he'll keep it.
which is what he does. preparing and cleaning a random glass jar big enough to fit the flowers, found somewhere around his barracks. it's now put to better use instead of just collecting dust, now filled up with water, the stems of the roses inside.
he sets it on the nightstand next to his bed, and for some reason the room feels a little more homey. oh and don't forget the tag, which he sets next to the jar of blossoms, just in case he does remember who's handwriting that is, he'll be 100% sure who it is and won't be doubting himself if he checks it.
he has come to terms with it now. he's comfortable in bed and he won't be asking himself or anyone else questions that'll lead to nothing. he's sure the one who gave him the bouquet will reveal themselves soon enough. like he told himself, 'he won't lose sleep over this.'
and he is about to drift off into sleep— until suddenly he remembers, and he jolts, sitting up.
he turns his head to look at the roses as his brain is overwhelmed with inquiry. price knows who it is. it's c/n. it's y/n. and now he just has more questions, some the same as previous ones but with the added confusion that it's you that got the flowers for him.
he is going to lose sleep over this after all.
Johnny 'Soap' MacTavish:
when soap first heard about the captain's situation, he thought it was hilarious. he got roses from an unknown individual? that's silly. he almost even started laughing seeing price so frustrated and baffled over a bouquet of plants.
though, after he said he didn't know anything about any flowers and price walked away in disappointment to go question his other sergeant, perhaps he was a little jealous. don't look at him like that. what's so wrong about maybe wanting a secret admirer?
unbeknownst to him, he would get a gift of his own in no time. when he got to the mess hall, he immediately spotted a box of something right on his table. he quickly went to the seat he always sits at, because of course he has a specific place to eat every day— and he hopes it isn't too obvious to the other soldiers nearby that he's resisting the urge to dash over and admire the supposed present.
when he finally gets to see the gift up close, he practically has stars in his eyes. the note on top of the box catches his eyes first before anything, a simple sentence of 'heard you had a sweet tooth.' typed on the printed out paper.
he has to resist a giddy grin creeping onto his face as he carefully slides the note aside, looking at the box of assorted chocolates in front of him. ultimately, he breaks, and a smile is instantly plastered on his face, already taking one of the sweets and plopping it into his mouth, humming contentedly.
he has the urge to dig into all of them because the candy is remarkably delicious and has his body tingling with dopamine, but fights it and chooses on savoring the gift, taking time to relish in each pieces' flavor.
he enjoys the way the first layers of chocolate slowly melts on his tongue and the taste of the equally chocolate-y syrup inside hits him like a freight train— it makes him appreciate the person who gave him this even more so.
don't worry though, johnny isn't too greedy. he saves the other half of the box for later.
eventually, he does lift his glued-on gaze from the gift to around the mess hall. though, he's met with the other soldiers giving him weird looks. and it does look kind of odd to be fair. a grown man, another soldier, in the mess hall eating a randomly fancy box of chocolates by himself.
despite the little awkward situation and the slightly unpleasant, silent walk out of the mess hall with the box in hand, you know he's walking around with a broad grin on his face for probably the next few days.
Kyle 'Gaz' Garrick:
to him, the similar occurrence between his captain and sergeant friend was strange. he'd heard identical stories from both of them now— the same concept of a mysterious offering given to them by a mysterious person.
he was wondering if the lieutenant got one too, and just hadn't told anyone. he was also questioning if he would get one as well. was this individual giving gifts to everyone in the task force?
well, he'd find out soon enough. the answer is most definitely yes.
he'd been dragged away by soap just right after a briefing, into a mostly empty hallway. and after a measly, short conversation and or slight argument about why gaz had been dragged here in the first place, and also why soap looked like he was holding in a giggle fit, the latter pulled out a box from his pocket. so he is getting a gift as well— same note and everything.
soap explains that he'd been requested by this 'anonymous person' to deliver him one as well, like a damn messenger pigeon.
so gaz takes the container carefully in hand before soap snickers and scurries away to do whatever.
he's pretty interested in what's inside as he properly takes a look at it. the box is flatter than your average box, black and sleek with of course, a small, yellow sticky note taped on top. 'this is one of our favourite memories. -unknown.'
he glances around the empty hallway for a moment, feeling a bit weird standing in a quiet hallway, opening a present by himself, alone. but nevermind that— he opens it, and kyle is met with.. a necklace. a silver necklace with a heart locket attached to the bottom.
he moderately cocks his head at the sight of the locket, then picks the necklace up with his right hand, the box still resting on the surface of the other. he opens the heart and squints, a mini photograph of himself and.. another recruit, wearing a mask, so he couldn't see their face. his hand was slung over their shoulder and they were doing the same to his, and despite them covering their face, he could still see a small smile on their face and his own.
he can remember this. he thinks he knows this. it was a group photo of the whole task force. there's the other soldiers in this photo too, but the photo is cropped in a way that you can only see him and the other comrade.
but he doesn't seem to.. remember who he was next to? something in his memory is bugged, like when you forget that one word but you also somewhat remember at the same time, or you forget what you were going to say while having a conversation with somebody.
it almost makes him as frustrated as price when he got his gift, but he wants to push those other emotions aside and just focus on the gratefulness he feels. to be honest he adores the necklace. he's sure he would think it suits him if he wore it and looked in the mirror.
and the picture.. he's still thinking about it. still looking at it. he finds the memory charming and sweet, even if he can't remember this soldier properly. he likes the way he can still see both of the happiness and smile in their eyes despite how tiny the image is. he likes the way he can see the shine and colour in their eyes in the dim light where the photo was taken.
the more he admires the jewelry the more he falls in love with it. the more he wants to cherish it and the mysterious fella who has gifted it to him.
after a lot of staring, and smiling at the present in hand, he finally closes the locket and slips the necklace on, briefly feeling the cold silver around his neck before it turns warm from his body heat.
and then he just walks off casually just like soap, who's probably waiting around the corner to ask "what'd you get?"
he now holds the box close to his chest as if he might keep that too, nearing the end of the hallway.
kyle's mind goes to the photo again, and his brain starts whirring with the thoughts of who it is.
but he's sure he'll remember later. he'll know who the person is soon enough, maybe if he sees them walking through the halls with that same mask. but either way, he knows he'll remember, and he'll thank them for this gift.
Simon 'Ghost' Riley:
now, he already knew he was going to get a gift as well, seeing as everyone in the task force but him has gotten at least something. he's heard price's predicament, johnny entering a briefing a little too happily with small bits of chocolate syrup near his lips, and kyle proudly walking around base wearing a necklace.
but he has some assumptions that the person didn't get anything for him. he's.. well, simon 'ghost' riley, after all. spooky, intimidating to most, tall dude.
but it seems his assumptions were incorrect, because he came back to his barracks after somewhat of a rough mission just to notice a a small, dark box oddly left on top of one of the shelves near his bed.
after easily retrieving the container, he examines it— and there's the typical 'note' from them, a few words written on top of the lid with a white marker. it reads, 'saw this and it reminded me of you. from a soldier friend of yours.'
.. but what if this 'soldier friend' has actually left a bomb inside of this? will it explode right now? a spy camera? is anybody watching?
you can't blame him for the skepticism. a strange box randomly appearing on one of your shelves? you would be hesitant to open it too.
after a few shakes he gives to the box to hear if anything suspicious is inside, he decides that it isn't a miniscule explosive or a secret camera or any other funky gadget.
simon opens it, and one of his eyebrows raises as an automatic response. a bracelet? specifically, a bracelet made of small, shiny, white pearls with a single flower charm.
but he's not ungrateful or doesn't like it, per se, he's just.. confused. as everyone else was.
confused that somebody thought to get him a gift. bought something for him that he never asked for or mentioned or even thought of himself.
it's not what he was expecting at all. a bracelet. really? for him? but why? he stands in that spot for a good minute, trying to make sense of this. but he's also trying to tell himself he doesn't care about this.
but there's a little creature in his heart or in his brain or something whispering to him that he actually kind of likes it.
he won't admit any of this— but he does end up keeping it, box and all. and he does like the gorgeous glossiness of the pearls and the intricate details and carvings of the charm.
he likes the way it feels on his wrist when he slides it on. it has a nice, cool feeling, but not cold enough for it to be uncomfortable. like the way a cold pillow feels nice against your head.
and from that day forward, if you look closely enough, you can always see a glimpse of a shiny piece of jewelry peeking through the bottom of ghost's sleeve.
Tumblr media
290 notes · View notes
impishjesters · 1 year ago
Note
Can you do Jax x reader who has a lot of insecurities about how they look and act in the real world and the digital one? And if not you can just ignore this 💕
Tumblr media
Insecurities
warning(s): Jax (only slightly kidding), insecurities, mentioned dark humor to cope, minor bullying (Jax throws Zooble and Dangle under the bus on their appearance) note(s): I'm quickly learning that just like Jax, I'd probably be an awful human being to seek comfort in.. at least words of comfort... A/N: Realized more than halfway through writing that I wasn't sure if the request was separate hc's like knowing him before being yoinked into the digital hellscape and after or not... Feel free to toss another ask though and I can try some pre-digital hellscape hc's...however, I feel like they'd still be pretty similar to the post-digital hellscape reactions.
Jax is probably the last person to talk to when it comes to insecurities, real or digital
One time the topic of what everyone looked like before being sucked into the digital hellscape came up, but not everyone remembered, whether it was because they simply couldn’t remember or because they’d been there too long to remember
Jax’s response is never consistent. In one comment he’ll say he misses having long hair and was 5’4”, and the next comment is how he was actually bald and 5’10”
Now whether that’s him fuckin around or not is anybody’s guess
Currently, he’s got no real beef with his appearance, and he’s unapologetically himself digital or human. Now when it comes to you?
It can go a few different ways depending on how close the two of you are
Right out the gate, he’ll claim whatever toy-like appearance you’ve taken on can’t be any uglier than Zooble, which is like wow, harsh—they aren’t exactly easy on the eyes but that’s still a person with feelings…
He might even throw in a harsh comment about Gangle’s lack of a body, being ya know just ribbons… but hey! At least you have a body compared to her (Jax..that’s not helping..)
See what I said? Not the best person to go to with this sorta stuff
In the beginning, there’s always the gamble he might poke fun at your digital appearance and not really realize till later on that you were insecure about your appearance. (Whether it’s because someone else pointed it out or you flat-out told him.)
The closer the two of you get—friendship or romantic—he’s still an ass but once you’ve confronted him about your feelings and insecurities about your appearance, digital or human he knocks it off.
Nobody’s really voiced their complaints on what they ended up as here, at least not publically…
He’ll try to reassure you that you look fine, likely not understanding how deeply rooted something like insecurities can go and something like a “well I don’t think you’re ugly” isn’t gonna cut it.
Jax isn’t a sweet talker, or rather he doesn’t really sound all that genuine if he does, but he does try to put some emphasis that you really do look fine. (again, sweet but likely not helpful)
Now real world you? He wouldn’t know in the slightest, and while he could lie and say that the description you gave him wasn’t anything to be ashamed of, he’s not gonna do that to you (not that the appearance you gave him sounded ugly or anything).
Jax copes with dark humor and will without a doubt throw out some comment about how you won’t have to be insecure about your human appearance anymore because it’s unlikely any of you are getting out of here. (I’m sorry I’m laughing so hard because that would 15/10 make me laugh, dark humor is how I cope)
It’s not helpful (depending on the individual at least)
Oh! What about now you don’t have to worry about any acne or wrinkles?
Better? But is it really? Eh..
Overall he’s not particularly great at the whole reassurance about your appearance or how you act “I mean have you seen how some of the others act?” (Jax that’s not..helpful), but because you are someone important to him he’ll make the extra effort to listen to exactly what it is your insecure about and if you need him to reassure you he’ll do so
It might sound insincere but that’s just how he talks
On the off chance that you have a really bad day, it tugs at his heartstrings (yeah, he has those), he’ll pull you aside and give you little kisses over those places.
Insecure about something facial-wise? Face kisses.
You end up as a toy with too many legs and not enough fingers? Kisses (maybe not the legs though...)
When in doubt kisses and he’ll let you hug him or whatever, but breathe a word of this to the other’s and he’ll.. I dunno, prank you later or something. He'll have to workshop it.
Back to the act thing, I don’t personally know how someone would be insecure over that—but if you stim or anything of the sort Jax won’t really comment on it, but if someone else does? Poor them because they are about to get on the bunny’s bad side.
Gangle stims and as big of an asshole as Jax is, he’s never made fun of her for it.
647 notes · View notes
bellarkeselection · 11 months ago
Note
as a chandler ask!
maybe something like in the show with rachel and ross where they were watching the tapes and found out the ross liked rachel but with chandler and fem! reader??
The Video Tape Confession
Tumblr media
Everybody was sitting around the apartment watching tv while it was raining heavily outside meaning nobody felt like doing anything. I was sitting in the middle of the couch with Phoebe and Chandler on either side of me. Rachel was sitting on the floor rummaging around in one of the cabinets underneath the tv. “Hey what’s this tape?”
“Huh I’m not sure. Let’s play it and see.” Monica replied taking the tape from her putting it inside the video player on the tv.
The video starts playing on the screen showing me, Rachel and Monica sitting in Monica’s bedroom with her parents recording whatever we were doing. I didn’t really remember the night until Rachel bounced on the bed. “So Y/n do you have any guys your interested in. Prom is only a few weeks away.”
“Oh I don’t have anyone in mind.” I shrugged my shoulders on the tape.
Monica tilled her head. “Hang on your lying. You avoid eye contact and bite your lip when you do.”
“I do not!” I snapped back at her.
She pushed me almost off the bed and onto the floor. “Just tell us. We won’t tell anybody.”
“Okay we’ll there is this one guy but he’s in college. So I doubt he and I would be able to end up together.” Myself on the camera said while I flipped back on the bed covering my face with my hands.
Joey who was sitting in the armchair asked. “Who was the guy?”
“Ross, didn’t say you needed help moving some stuff in your apartment. I can help with that.” I changed the subject getting up to my feet with Ross standing in the kitchen grabbing a snack.
Phebe gasped pointing her index finger. “She’s avoiding the video now. She’s embarrassed of who’s name she said is on the tape.”
“Now we have to watch it.” Chandler declared clapsing his hands together in his lap.
Running my fingers through my hair I watched the video in honor not wanting anyone especially a certain person to know. Chandler focused his attention on the tv while my face turned red hearing the words come out on the recording. “What’s the guys name?”
“His name is Chandler, Chandler Bing.” I answered Monica’s question nervously.
Everybody turned their heads in shock and awe after hearing the words. I sunk down into the couch covering my red face with my hands groaning in embarrassment. “How didn’t we remember this?” Rachel gasped.
“Chandler did you have any idea?” Ross asked taking a bite out of his sandwich suprised that he didn’t have any idea about this.
Chandler slowly turned around on the couch chuckling nervously. “I had no idea I am just a guy despite for love but I will most likely die alone.”
“I’m gonna go.” I bolted up to my feet so ready to just by myself for the rest of the evening. I couldn’t face the possibility of hearing him say he didn’t feel the same way. Honestly I can’t believe that tape even still exists. I thought Monica and Ross’s parents has gotten rid of it.
Chandler bolted to his feet. “Y/n, wait.”
“What is it, Chandler. I really don’t want to hear that you don’t feel-“ He cut me off quickly cupping my face in his hands and crashing his lips down onto mine since I was shorter than he was.
My hands froze on his chest for a moment. I couldn’t believe it but it was too hard to resist. Throwing my arms around his neck I pressed myself further against him. “I would have told you how I felt sooner if I knew you felt the same.” He admitted making me chuckle.
“See everybody finds their partner with these videos.” Phebe grinned brightly.
Comments really appreciated ❤️ Tags @lover-of-books-and-tea @rosie-posie08
388 notes · View notes
mae-gi-writes · 7 months ago
Text
Finders Keepers | Gally [TMR] - Part 6
Tumblr media
In which Gally gets soft for one of the boys in the Glade, only…is it a boy? alternatively; In which Mai disguises herself into a boy to fit in the Glade, only to be suspected by the keen eyes of the Builder's Keeper.
taglist: @edynmeyer1 @ss28 @kurowvie @vaugarkel @marikittt @angelfrombeneth @undeniableadrenaline @persiar9 @ss28
Also available on Wattpad.
--
PREVIOUS | NEXT >>>
"She needs to be banished."
"I say we banish her!"
"She doesn't belong here!"
"She's a liar!"
The Homestead is filled with angry shouts and protests as Mai sits fingering the hem of her shirt nervously. There's no doubt that there is outrage at the prospect of her lying, but it's definitely the fact that she's a girl that's getting her into this big mess. But what could she have done when the voices in her head are so strong that she has no choice but to obey?
Last night had been terrible. She had nightmares, flashbacks of the night before, the look of Henry's face plaguing her mind until she woke up with a heaving chest. So fearful she'd been that she'd crawled from her mattress to the edge of Gally's bed, wishing to feel him close at her side.
Gally, who had still been sleepy when his eyes had blinked open at her, merely grunted before flipping his blanket open for her. The girl took this chance to burrow herself into his side. She hadn't cared about personal space or about the fact that the Builder would make fun of her for this. She'd only wanted to feel safe, and it's with Gally that she could have a peace of mind.
Which is how she found herself cooped up into Gally's arms in the morning, opening her eyes to see none other than his peaceful features. She'd spent some time admiring him alright, tracing them with her eyes and realizing that Gally looked years younger when he didn't have that permanent frown on his face. And when the Builder had slowly come out of sleep, the girl had quickly squeezed her eyes shut in an attempt to feign sleep.
She'd felt him take a surprised breath, the arm around her waist tensing underneath her, before he'd gently tugged his limb out and moved away from the bed with the kind of surprising gentleness that she hadn't suspected he had. What he hadn't known however, was the way Mai's heart had been beating erratically against her chest this entire time she'd forced herself to stay still.
If she closes her eyes now, she can almost feel the sensation of his hands along her waist. It makes her shiver.
"Alright everyone calm down!" Alby's voice booms through the room and there's instant silence that prevails, leaving only suspicious eyes and reluctant looks at the Leader of the glade.
"Nobody is getting banished for anything," Alby continues despite the flurry of protests at his words. He raises his voice so that it booms across the room, "Mai is one of ours. She's a Glader just like the rest of you."
"She shuckin' lied to us!" One of the gladers spit out.
"And did that hurt you? No? Exactly," Alby points out, "as far as I know, she hasn't hurt anybody around here."
"I agree with him," Minho says from his spot, arms crossed and looking over at Mai with a wink, "if anything, she's the one that's helping to fees your stomachs, you stupid slintheads."
"But she still lied. Does that not count for anything?" another glader asks.
The choral of debates pick up and Mai can't help but cover her ears out of instinct. They're all too loud, so loud they make her ears hurt and she has half a mind to walk out of the room before Alby finally yells out for silence.
The noise ceases and everyone listens.
"Right," his voice rings out with authority, "this is what we're gonna do. It's true that Mai broke the rules by lying to us, but that does not mean she gets banished. She didn't hurt anyone. She's the one who almost got hurt." he turns to her then, a flash of sympathy swimming in his eyes. But she gives him a quiet nod, as if in understanding, "so one night in the Slammer is your punishment."
Mai will take it. It's not the best, but she'll survive.
So she doesn't protest or fight when Newt and Minho flank her sides, accompanying her to one of the Slammer cages. They help her inside before closing the door behind her with apologetic looks on their faces.
"Sorry Greenie," Newt says, "we'll get you out of here first thing in the morning."
"I'll come and slip you food," Minho reassures.
"Thanks," Mai's voice is weak and tiny as it echoes out of the cage. She doesn't say anything else as she settles down onto the hard muddy floor. Great, and now she'll have even more dirty clothes to wash.
The hours go by and time seems to lose meaning. Mai tries to occupy herself by counting how many roots she can find sticking out from the opposite mud wall but soon loses interest when the light of the sun slowly disappears and turns to a blanket of darkness. Soon, all the bustling and the clinking of tools, the shouts and the buzz of conversation still to a stop once the light of the day starts going out. And that's when the fear starts to crawl over her spine.
She tries not to think about what had happened with Henry but it's almost impossible to close her eyes without seeing all of him in display before her. Mai clenches her teeth together, arms wrapping protectively around her knees as she allows her face to bury into the small nook of comfort that it creates.
Crunch. The sound of footsteps cause Mai to jerk up, eyes flitting towards the black sky. Her breath catches in her throat as she waits, muscles tense. She's had enough adventure to last herself a lifetime and is in no need of more boys like Henry around. Especially right now.
But then, a voice slips through the silence and causes her to sigh out in relief.
"Hey Greenie."
Gally.
And there comes his face between the caged bars, frowning is usual frown as if everything displeases him. The familiar sight is one that is welcome by the said girl, whose chest fills with emotion upon seeing his figure standing a few meters away. She's never felt so safe with anyone but Gally and that simple fact brings back memories of them cooped up together in his bed. Heat flushes through her cheeks at the thought and she's glad it's night time, so that Gally doesn't have to see the embarrassment flooding her face.
"Hi Gally," she croaks out weakly.
He lets out a sigh. She hears him move about until she spots his figure as he takes a seat perched right atop the cage.
"Thought you'd be hungry," he proceeds to toss her a wrapped sandwich that Mai grabs without hesitation.
She unwraps it with barely restrained hunger and the first bite is amazing, flavours exploding onto her tongue and causing her to groan in delight. She hasn't eaten since morning and her stomach is practically growling itself to death at this point.
"You'll have to stay the night," Gally's voice echoes through the cell wall.
Mai bites down onto her lower lip, "I know." Her eyes flutter up to his. She's surprised by the gentleness she finds there. It's not something she's used to, "I'll be fine."
Gally doesn't respond for a while. Mai busies herself with the food in hopes that the awkward atmosphere will somehow dissipate. She's not quite sure how Gally takes it; the news about her being a girl. They haven't spoken about it since and something in her heart squeezes at the thought that he doesn't want anything else to do with her now that he knows her secret.
But then again, he wouldn't be here providing her with food right?
That is why she's surprised when he says:
"I'm sorry."
Mai blinks up, surprised.
"Why?" The words fall out of her mouth before she can stop them, "it's not your fault. If anything, it's mine."  The last few words trail off into a whisper, as though saying them aloud might bring back the memory of last night.
He takes a breath, exhales it out as one hand rubs at his hair. He has a very bad habit of doing that when something's on his mind.
"Gally," Mai calls out once she's done with her food and crumpled the wrapping paper up into a ball. When his blue orbs meet hers, dancing with the light of the lamp, she gives him a small smile, "thank you. For saving me."
He grunts as if to say you're welcome, and she swear she spots a blush crawling up his face. Grinning to herself, Mai settles back against the wall as she hears the soft chants of the cicadas signaling that the night will be long.
"You don't have to stay here with me, you know." she says suddenly, only to find Gally already looking back down with furrowed brows. The look on his face is somewhat endearing. She's learnt to love it, his grouchiness.
"It's either that or you're all alone, greenie."
"I can take care of myself."
"That's not what you said last night."
Mai flushes at his words. Well, he's not the greatest at softening blows now, is he? "Well, that was--it was just last night..." her words end in a mumble, causing a soft snicker from the said Builder.
"Try and get some sleep, Greenie." He settles himself more comfortably against the top so that he's lounging onto the edge, visible enough for Mai to see him without having to crane her neck or look about, "I don't need you being all cranky tomorrow morning. And--" he peers down at her with what looks to be a smirk, "--don't think I'll let you off the hook so easily just 'cause you're a girl."
"Slinthead," Mai mutters under her breath, but loud enough for him to hear as she nestles her head against the wall and curls up her legs underneath, "night Gally."
"Goodnight Greenie."
-----
The next few days are weird.
Weird, because Gally now has to re-train his brain into thinking that Mai's indeed, a girl, and that it's not just something that he's come up with as a theoretical explanation. No, she's actually a girl and she looks like one, even.
It's not just the fact that she's tiny and pale and looks like she could snap in two with just a huge gust of wind. It's not just the fact that she's always in the kitchens and is now able to tie her hair back with a bandana to keep it away from her face -- something that she'd avoided because it would make people talk back then -- not just the fact that Mai, he realizes, has soft and fine, delicate features akin to a doll, a complete contrast to the rough hands and the hardened faces of the boys in the Glade.
No. It's the fact that despite all of what he's just described as above, despite everything that he's listed out like a reason for him to blame upon, it's Mai's brown eyes -- those big, beautiful eyes framed by lashes and always looking at him like she's in a permanent state of surprise -- that has his heart skipping and his chest tightening for god knows what reason.
Maybe he's coming down with something. He surely is. He feels hot and cold and hot all at once, and that's proven to be signs of sickness.
But it's a harder face to ignore than most. Suddenly, Mai is the center of attention and all boys are basking, begging to be part of her circle. Some gladers are giving her a helping hand when carrying stuff to and from the kitchen, some are chatting her up whenever they find her alone and free, others are always asking whether she needs anything; someone to walk with her, someone to guard her showers, someone to help her pick up branches for firewood.
Gally's not too sure how he feels about that. So he decidedly puts a stop to all his feelings. And plus, the Greenie is now fine with everyone and seems to be getting along quite well. She doesn't look in need of his help any longer.
Nevertheless, a few days go by and finally it's time for the box to come up. They all crowd around it nervously, knowing exactly at what precise time the metal hinges will scream with effort as the box is dragged upwards. Gally is busy frowning down at the metal-clad hole in the ground with such intensity that he almost misses the soft tap on his shoulder.
He turns, eyes flickering over Mai's features as something in his heart tugs. A cold, he thinks to himself, he really needs to get himself checked out by the Med-Jacks.
"Gally," her eyes light up when she smiles. She has a pretty smile. How had he not noticed that before when she'd claimed to be a guy?
He nods to her, frown still in place as he turns back to the hole, "Greenie."
"I'm not going to be a Greenie anymore," Mai reminds him, "we'll get a new one today."
He glances back at her over his shoulder, "the name suits you."
She pouts and this particular expression on hers throws him off guard, heart suddenly clamoring in his chest and his hands suddenly aching to reach out and pinch her cheeks. God she's cute when she wants to be.
The familiar clanging of metal and the whirring of cogs steals his attention away. All Gladers turn to it expectantly as the box slowly crawls up to their level before finally coming to a stop with a screeching halt.
"Open it up!" Alby shouts as him and Newt grab both sides of the box. Gally leans over to help and they tug it out of the way to reveal a young, pudge-faced boy that looks no older than twelve.
"It's a boy!" one of the Gladers shout out in what sounds to be happiness and Mai can't help but scoff.
Since Mai is the greenie right before him, she has the responsibility of introducing the boy to the Glade. He's young and has a cherubic face, and almost bursts into tears the moment he is lifted from the box. Alby had had to calm him down and explain to him how the Glade works in the privacy of the Homestead as everyone resumed their work for the day, and after that the young boy was introduced to Mai as Chuck.
Chuck is nice and friendly once he gets comfortable with Mai's presence, and the two seem to hit it off once they get past the pleasantries of the Glade. He seems already a bit homesick and Mai is quick to reassure him that the Glade already feels like home to her.
"Don't worry," Mai says as she helps him tie up his hammock next to hers. Gally had previously forced her to move her hammock as close to his hut as possible in case of any inappropriate behavior from the boys now that her identity was out in the open, so she was now placed on the very edge of the Hammock space, right in front of the said Builder's front door. It's not a problem in the grand scheme of things. But it is an issue when Gally just has to glance at the new kid to make his eyes water.
"He's not that bad you know," Mai explains to Chuck as the younger boy settles himself into his hammock, "he's a bit grouchy sometimes. But he's got a good heart."
"Are you sure we're talking about the same dude?" Chuck asks, fingering the hem of the new t-shirt he's received from one of the Gladers.
Mai can't help but laugh, "yes, we are. I swear to you. His heart's in the right place," she pauses, hesitant to say the words that come next, "He was actually really sweet to me throughout my first month at the glade."
Chuck's eyes are gazing upon her with a childlike curiosity that has her squirming in place and Mai feels the heat of embarrassment crawling up her cheeks as she tries to blow out some air. That's when he drops the bomb:
"You like him?"
Her heart stops, head whipping up to his, "what?" she stammers out, "what do you mean?"
"You know," Chuck says with the calmness of her mature person despite the fact that he's two feet shorter than she is, "like when people like each other. Not just as friends. As something more. Do you like him that way?"
"I--" Mai's heart is pumping so loud she's surprised Chuck can't hear it. But if it's not her heart, it's her face flushing red that gives her away. She doesn't need to answer, for Chuck seems to have read it straight from her expression.
His face explodes into a mischievous grin, "you do like him!"
"No, I--"
"Yes you do. Look at your face, it's written all over it!"
"No no, not like that--"
"You do! You like him!"
"Who likes who?"
Mai turns, yelping in shock as Chuck almost falls from his hammock. The Keeper of the Builders is staring him down, eyebrows raised in suspicion before his blue eyes direct themselves towards Mai's face. He repeats his question, "you like someone?"
Somehow, the darkness in his tone is impossible to ignore.
Mai is quick to dispel his thoughts for fear that her red face is going to give it all away, "no of course not, I--"
"Yes she does, and guess what Gally? She--"
Mai's hand shoots out, slapping onto Chuck's mouth before she sends Gally an innocent grin. The latter doesn't seem quite as thrilled at the new statement, gaze flickering between Mai's uneasy smile and Chuck's struggling expression.
"She what?"
"Nothing at all!" Mai throws the younger boy a glare before shoving him back into his hammock and turning to Gally with a smile so huge it looks like it hurts, "what you up to, Gal?"
If he's noticed the nickname, he decides to ignore it in favor of crossing his arms and cocking his head at her. There's a ghost of a smile, just barely there, on his face, "I wanted to show you somethin'. " He then turns to walk away, glancing back at her over his shoulder expectantly like he wants her to follow him.
So Mai throws Chuck one last glance of disapproval, "don't go anywhere alone. I'll finish the tour this afternoon." before she's off skipping in Gally's direction all while whistling a soft tune under her breath.
They make their way to the Builder's section, looking more like a garden with an array of tools scattered about the place while others are poised dangerously over overgrown tree roots. Gally calls out for the mess to be cleaned up and Mai's stomach clenches with sudden admiration. It's not something she'd say out loud but seeing Gally in his natural element makes her insides turn to mush.
He ducks into a small hut designed to keep his floorplans and blueprints. Mai follows, only to stop dead in her tracks at the piece of furniture sitting at the centre of the room.
"What's that?" She cocks her head curiously.
One of his hands go up to rub the back of his neck. He seems embarrassed, eyes shying away from hers to gaze at the furniture instead.
"That's a bed," he says almost reluctantly, voice scratchy and rough and making Mai yearn for more, "I thought it might fit you."
Surprise flits across her face, "thank you, that's—really kind of you." She shakes her head then, "but I'm not sure I have space to fit that in the Homestead—"
But the words get stuck in her throat when the Builder turns to gaze her head-on, those cerulean eyes like aquamarine storms of emotions flickering across his pupils like words that he can't seem to find.
"It's yours. Alby and I— well," he hesitates, "we thought you might want a Hut."
Mai stares at him. A hut? Just for her?
Her heart skips a beat and suddenly the air around her feels warm. Surely he didn't do that just for her right?
"But that's not fair is it?" She murmurs out, "all the other gladers—"
"Have eyes on you," he cuts her off with a firm stare, "it's better if you have a place of your own."
"But my hammock's right next to your hut. Makes it safe enough doesn't it?"
"I'm not always gonna be there Mai, I—" he swallows thickly, as if he'd stopped himself from saying anything else in case he might say too much. Pressing his lips together instead, Gally continues in a grumble, "it's better this way Greenie."
"I'm not a greenie anymore."
A semblance of a smile ghosts past his lips, "I know. It still fits you though."
Mai can't help but grin before she shoves him playfully. Although Gally barely budges. He's built like a brick wall after all. It's impossible to move him.
"Well, thank you Gally," she looks back towards the bed, "I'll take care of it."
"Right you do, Greenie."
----
182 notes · View notes
miffyscreams · 2 months ago
Text
**not cutesy sad girl blogging, feel free to scroll on if ur not interested !!
i know there are a lot of people on here who are in their young/mid teens and might be seeking help for the first time (or doing so soon) so i just wanted to put this out there- misdiagnosis is possible and extremely, extremely common. this is specifically tailored to bpd because i know most of us here have it
i completely understand wanting a diagnosis to understand why you do the things you do and feel the way that you do and that is 100% completely fine. but please, please be careful that you don’t become so desperate for answers that you end up accepting an inaccurate or unethical label. if you’re under 18 and early in therapy (less than a year) or not in inpatient care and receive a formal bpd diagnosis, please be careful. it’s often not a misdiagnosis and is likely to be correct but it goes against ethical standards and is a massive red flag of your provider. minors can have bpd (and do!! it starts developing super young) but the diagnostic process is very different to when you’re an adult and should only be made in an emergency or after long term observation. this doesn’t mean you don’t have bpd, it just means that your psych has not gone through the proper process and that can have implications for the rest of your care. being medically recognised is a completely different story and not a bad thing. but when your personality is technically still developing, your provider needs to be 100% sure without a doubt that it is disordered and not caused by anything else before putting a formal diagnosis on your file. not doing that is unethical even if the diagnosis is correct. the amount of teenage girls who have been misdiagnosed with bpd and ended up actually having autism, adhd or cptsd that goes untreated until their 30s is astounding. you probably do have bpd but you should not get a bpd diagnosis put on your record at fifteen years old after seeing your psychologist for three sessions.
in that same vein, if you receive a diagnosis (of any disorder, at any age) and it doesn’t feel right, PLEASE CHALLENGE IT. please seek a second opinion if you have concerns. being treated for the wrong diagnosis can make your condition worse. being viewed with the stigma of a disorder that you don’t have can make your condition worse. up until this year i spent seven years of my life receiving misdiagnosis after misdiagnosis. trust me when i say you’re better off getting no diagnosis at all than getting the wrong one. this is especially true if you think you have bpd but end up getting a bipolar diagnosis- most medications have an inverse effect on us and being prescribed a cocktail of atypicals because they think you’re just not responding to the meds will fuck you up.
there’s a lot of fearmongering online, especially on tiktok, about getting a formal bpd diagnosis so i also just wanted to clear up that no, you will not be rejected entry from countries, you will not be rejected for loans or home ownership and you will not be rejected from career opportunities. the only people who have access to your medical records without a subpoena are your doctors. you are not legally obligated to tell anybody and nobody outside of your care team is allowed to access or request your info outside of a court setting. being diagnosed does not ruin your life as long as you have good medical professionals around you.
if you want to seek help, PLEASE DO. but please advocate for yourself whenever necessary. you deserve help and you deserve a team who listens to your concerns and diagnoses you responsibly. most professionals will leave a diagnosis off your record if you request it (usually unless it’s schizophrenia or bipolar, literally only because it’s important for everybody providing you any form of treatment in any context to know). good psychs will allow you to question a diagnosis and a lot will let you reject it or ask for extra consideration.
74 notes · View notes
furiousgoldfish · 6 months ago
Text
I had a conversation the other day, with a person who seemed to have some respect for me, but couldn't understand why I'm still having trauma symptoms, and can't be normal already. I took it as a chance to try and explain my symptoms, but it seemed to fall on deaf ears;  I was told I just needed to tell myself that 'I am a new person now', and forget about the past. The person then explained to me how they weren't always the same person either, and they would sometimes cringe at their behaviour in the past, but then they would be proud of themselves for being smarter and more reasonable today. I couldn't quite explain to them that my situation was not the same.
They gave me various suggestions like 'just don't think about these things anymore', and 'these people are not going to hurt you anymore', which I strongly doubted was true. I tried to explain that I am not purposefully thinking about it; in fact, I was doing everything to avoid it. But with intrusive thoughts, flashbacks, nightmares, and the symptoms of the dissociative disorder, I had no control over it, the past was at my throat, holding me and unwilling to let go. I could tell that they still believed I was doing it on purpose, holding on and refusing to stop living in the past.
I very rarely get a chance to talk to someone about anything trauma related, so I was originally grateful that anyone was even showing an interest at 'attempting to help me', but later when I thought about the entire thing, I got pissed off.
Firstly it doesn't make any sense for me to be 'normal', in any timeline, regardless of how much time has passed. You can't have a person living first few decades of their life in belief that their life is worthless, in environment where they're getting locked up, beaten, humiliated, tortured, threatened with death, brainwashed to believe they're not human, severely neglected, and without any kind of genuine caretaker or a parent. And then leave it to this person to 'deal with it alone', never getting any help, never even getting reassured that what happened to them was wrong. That is complete abandonment by human society, and I find it sick and twisted that this person should be expected to adhere and integrate into society afterwards, for what? This person will logically feel betrayed, untrusting, bitter, feral and unnacepting the society's standards, especially their standards for victim blaming and ignoring abuse. Society continually fails these people expects them to 'fix themselves' so nobody would feel uncomfortable about it.
Secondly why is it up to me to change as a person? I am not like this because 'I was not a good enough person', I am not the one who needs changing. I am good as I am. It's worse that after being failed in every aspect, I am now being seen as the one in 'the need of change', for not acting normal and being haunted by my past. I am not hurting anybody! I am the only one suffering from this. God forbid my reality leaves someone uncomfortable, I better try to hide it better. Which I actually do unless sometimes is actively asking me about it.
And the last bit of my anger is about making it seem like the actual problem is 'me holding onto the past', and not my life being severely different and harmful in a way that isolates me from other people. I don't have the same formative experiences other people had. I don't remember being cooed at and hugged, I don't have endless experiences of being taught that I'm important, that someone will care and intervene when I'm in pain, that the figures of mother and father are safe, warm, comforting and reliable. That childhoods are a positive and fun part of life. That families work as an environment for children to be raised on. I don't have the experiences that formed all other beliefs that this culture holds, I hold nothing sacred that is sacred to everyone else, I don't believe in the authorities, I don't believe in family, I don't rejoice with holidays, I don't want children, I don't trust religion, I feel contempt towards capitalism, I don't relate or connect to people who are receptive to any of it.
And it turns out I'm right to feel as I do. Because people in this society will actively come to me asking me to 'stop being like that', while never asking any abuser to 'stop being like that'. Victims who make them uncomfortable can be spoken down to, should be told to stop being traumatized, even in private, while the abusers just need to be 'ignored' and 'hopefully they stop doing it'. What a great plan. Surely it will fix everything.
Humane thing to do would be to approach me with awareness that I've been treated like a worthless creature and address it and allow me to act genuine about it. If I'm still feeling betrayed, abandoned and outcast from society, I should be able to express that. I deserve to react with genuine responses rather than this insane preformance art I have to do every single day to make sure nobody else is aware or uncomfortable by my peril.
141 notes · View notes
wordstome · 1 year ago
Text
kingdom come - ii
Tumblr media
king König x princess & assassin reader
2nd person, no y/n, she/her pronouns, afab reader, romance, enemies to lovers, arranged marriage, kind of age gap because König has been king for a good chunk of time but it's not really much of a factor, fantasy/medieval setting
4.4k words
tw: none
[PREVIOUS] [NEXT]
Let's have something lighthearted and playful after the absolute Week the cod fandom has had, shall we?
Tumblr media
“What do you mean he’s letting you kill him?”
“I don’t know what you want from me, Calliope, I thought I made myself quite clear.”
“But…but that’s mad!”
“He is mad!” You shove the sleeves of your blouse over your arms. “But I’m still alive, so I’m not complaining.”
“Of course. Should I send word to your father about these new developments?”
You bite your lip. “No,” you say. Something catches your eye outside the window, and you move closer to have a look. König is outside, walking with one of his advisors while eating an apple. It’s a strange juxtaposition between the relaxed boyishness of him throwing the apple in the air and catching it, and the stark, emotionless expression of the mask covering half his face.
As if he can feel your gaze on you, he looks upwards, eyes locking with yours. You shudder and quickly shut the curtains.
“I can do this.” You say, determined.
Tumblr media
“You’re not eating.”
You stare resolutely at him from across the table. “I’m not hungry.”
He sighs, as if you’re a difficult child he’s being forced to babysit. “I heard your stomach growl. The food won’t bite back.”
“To be frank, I don’t know if I can trust you.”
“Who the fuck is Frank?”
You glower at him. “I know this is all a game to you, but I’m trying to stay alive.”
“By not eating?”
You look down at the food dubiously, and your doubt must be written all over your face, because König laughs. “Surely you do not think so lowly of me that I would poison my bride at the breakfast table,” he taunts. “That wouldn’t be in the spirit of the hunt.”
“You’ll have to forgive me for presuming otherwise of the man who asked me to eat a nightshade berry.”
He rolls his eyes. “One berry can’t kill a full-grown man. Or woman.” He takes a sip of wine. “And besides, that wasn’t the point of our little encounter in the garden anyway.”
Your hunger wins out over your apprehension. “Enlighten me,” you say, tucking into the food.
“Isn’t it obvious? I was testing you to see if you were going to try and kill me.” He points a fork with a piece of sausage on it at you. “Quiet, secluded place with nobody watching, plenty of exits. You surprised me by staring at me like a startled doe.”
“You caught me off guard,” you mutter. “You’re a very off-putting person.”
He gives you a bemused look. “You’re not a very good assassin.”
You bristle. “I assure you, if my target was anybody else, they would already be dead.”
“Tell me, princess. Have you ever killed anybody?”
“I’ve killed.”
“A human.”
“I know how to kill someone!”
“So that’s a no.”
You’re fuming at this point, your meal long forgotten. “It’s not to my advantage to let you know what I can and can’t do.”
He studies you, twirling his fork in an admittedly mesmerizing motion. “And your father sent you here, to kill me, having never spilled another person’s blood before.”
“My father prepared me my entire life for this.”
“Not sure that speaks highly of your skill.”
You’re already tired of him. “What’s the point of this?” you demand. “A smarter man would have either killed me or thrown me in a cell by now.”
“Not a smarter man, a boring one,” König corrects.
“So you have a death wish.”
“Of course not. I have much to live for. Eating, killing, fucking. Great fun. But not enough on its own.” His grin is near wolfish as he stares you down.
“You are vile.”
“You could be doing something about that.”
You look at him in mortified disbelief. “I’m not going to sleep with you.”
“I was referring to killing me, but it is interesting that’s where your mind went first.” He looks entirely too pleased with himself, as if he’s caught you in a clever trap.
“Fuck you.”
“Now we’re talking!” He stands up, and for one fleeting moment, you fear he’s about to make good on the offer, but instead he just wipes his mouth and makes to leave.
“As much as I’ve enjoyed this little bout of verbal sparring, I have somewhere to be.”
“You seem in quite a rush to leave my presence, for a man who seems so convinced I won’t be able to kill him.” If he wants to be a smart little asshole, you can too.
“Ah, believe me, princess. I would like nothing more than to spend all day in your lovely, murderous presence. But unfortunately, I have responsibilities.” He runs a hand through his tousled hair, and you studiously ignore the way your stomach flips a little at the motion. “I’m obligated to hear petitions.”
You stand up. “I’m coming with you.”
“Why? It’s fucking dull.”
“So I can have more opportunities to kill you.”
“Yes. Of course.” Again with that smile. You’ve never met anyone half as pleased to be in your presence as he is. (The only exception is Calliope, but she kind of has to be near you.) This man simply refuses to act in any normal manner whatsoever, and it’s starting to get on your nerves. You throw your dagger at the back of his head more out of irritation than a dedicated effort to kill him.
He catches it in the air with casual precision and keeps walking. “Too predictable, little one.”
You should be concerned by his razor-sharp reflexes, but it’s difficult to feel anything but annoyance right now. And…respect?
You get up and follow him before you can give yourself a chance to dissect that.
Tumblr media
König was right. This is dull.
At first, the concept of receiving petitioners seemed like an amusing prospect. But in practice, it’s all politics and people complaining about taxes.
You entertain yourself by watching König. He seems just as bored, if not more, as you. He appears to be intrigued by your dagger: examining it, testing the edge, handling the heft.
Some man is talking animatedly with his hands, bemoaning some property dispute with his neighbor. You’re sure that if König rolls his eyes any harder into the back of his skull, he’ll go pigeon-eyed. Admirably, he manages to push through—if it had been you, you would have just told the man to get out and stop wasting your time. As loathe as you are to admit it, König is a good leader.
“Alright, we’re done here. Tell them to go home,” König says, dismissing everyone with a flick of his wrist. The guards begin to push the doors closed when one last man runs in, near crazed, and throws himself on the floor, babbling incoherently.
“What is the meaning of this?” König demands, immediately standing up. The guards begin to approach the man, hands on swords.
“Wait! Please, your majesty, I beg of you,” the man pleads. “I have journeyed many days to come here and beseech your aid.”
König heaves a sigh. “Spit it out then.”
“Thank you, my king,” the man pants, pushing himself up to a standing position. “There’s a beast. In the south.”
“A beast?”
“It’s ravaging the countryside. It follows the flocks, but it doesn’t eat them. It’s…” The man swallows hard. He looks weary, run ragged no doubt by his arduous journey to the capital. “It’s taking our children, sir.”
König’s eyes narrow. “And you haven’t attempted to track it down yourself?”
“We’ve tried, your majesty. Our most skilled hunters have gone after it.” The man sways unsteadily on his feet. “None of them have come back.”
“Has anyone laid eyes on it? Is it a wolf?”
“None who have seen it have returned to tell the tale.”
König leans back, looking contemplative. One of his advisors speaks. “We’ve received reports about this already, sire. We’ve dispatched soldiers already but had no luck.”
The man shakes his head frantically. “It doesn’t leave anyone behind to tell the tale, sir. Not many people dare to go into the woods anymore, and the ones that do…they don’t come back right.”
“How so.”
The man’s voice betrays his naked fear, trembling. “They go mad, sir. Some think…some think it’s the fae’s doing.”
That seems to finally get König’s interest. He leans forward, his entire demeanor stiffening. A hush falls over the people gathered as the man invokes the fair folk’s name.
Everybody knows the fae exist. In hushed whispers, people tell the old stories: of when the fair folk lived among men and ruled over them with cruelty and trickery. There are some forests people know to stay out of. And when a newborn babe fusses just a bit too much, or a child grows up a little too quiet, the rumors fly in secret.
The fae are cruel, beautiful, and nearly impossible for a mortal to kill. If they’re involved in this matter with the beast, then that village is as good as dead.
Before König can say anything, the man fidgets and turns. You watch as his attention lands on you, eyes widening. Something his gaze becomes unfocused, misty, his chest beginning to heave as he visibly panics.
“You…they’re here…THEY’RE HERE!” With a crazed look on his face, the man lunges towards you, moving at a threatening speed. Your hand goes instinctively to your hidden sheathe, but your fingers close around air. Shit! König still has your dagger. You brace to defend yourself as the man draws even closer—
Like a deadly blur, König is on the man in an instant. The force of him knocks you backwards, watching in shock as König subdues the screaming, flailing man with cold, expert precision.
As if in slow motion, you watch with a mixture of horror and fascination as he turns to look at you. His eyes, usually a tranquil pale green, are blue. Vivid blue, with an unearthly glow to them that makes you wonder if you’re hallucinating. You feel like a butterfly pinned to cork by that stare, simultaneously trapped and admired.
He blinks, once, and his eyes are green again.
With what looks like no effort at all, he turns the man on his stomach and pins his arms behind him as he struggles and hollers. “Put this one in a cell,” he says with a deep growl. “We’ll see what he has to say for himself when he’s in his right mind again. If he ever is.” The guards rush forward to haul the man away as König stands back up.
He gives the rest of the room a cursory glance. “Well? Back to your duties.”
The gawking staff quickly gather themselves and scatter. König claps his hands together as if dusting off some nuisance.
“…Why did you do that?” You ask, unable to help yourself.
He gives you a skeptical look. “Why did I defend my queen from an attacker?”
You take a deep breath. Gods preserve you. “I’m not your anything.”
“Technically untrue. You are my wife, which makes you the queen.” He strides over to you and offers you your dagger, holding the blade so you can grab the hilt.
Its weight soothes you as you put it back into its rightful place. “I don’t understand.”
“I’ve already said I have no intention of killing you. Besides, it wouldn’t look good for me if I allowed you to be attacked in your own home.”
This isn’t my home, you almost say, but stop yourself. You’re starting to sound too much like a whining child, and you don’t like it.
You surprise the both of you with what comes out of your mouth next. “Thank you.”
He’s looking at you that way again, like you’re a puzzle he’s trying to solve. “You’re welcome.” He averts his eyes, hesitating for a moment like he wants to say more. Then he evidently thinks better of it and strides away from you.
“My lady!” Calliope rushes forward, concern written all over her face. “Are you alright?”
“Yes, just…shaken,” you say, still watching König leave. “I’m fine.”
“Simply outrageous. I can’t believe none of the guards got to that man in time,” she fumes, fussing over you in her way.
“Yes, well. König got here in time. So no harm was done.”
Calliope follows your gaze, eyes narrowing at König’s retreating backside just as he turns the corner and vanishes from sight. “I don’t like that one.”
“Neither do I,” you snort.
“No, pet. Listen to me.” Startled, you turn to look at her. You haven’t heard her take on this tone in quite a while: the last time was when you had broken your wrist trying to scale one of the abandoned towers back home. You can’t quite recall why you had been trying to do that, but you do remember the worried look on her face, and the sternness of her words.
“He’s not right,” she says. “Something’s wrong about him.”
It’s a foregone conclusion to say that König is no ordinary man, but something about the furrow of Calliope’s brow tells you that more is happening here than she’s letting on. “Are you going to elaborate?”
A strange look passes over her face, like a cloud briefly blocking the sun. “No.”
You wait for a few moments before nodding. Whatever it is, you trust her to know what’s best. “I see. Though I didn’t need a warning on how dangerous he is, you know.”
“You are a smart girl,” she says wistfully, straightening your ruffled clothes a bit. “But there are some things that are not for you to understand.”
“I have to understand, if I’m to kill him.”
She frowns. “I think you should put that out of your mind for now.”
“What?”
“I mean, you may have to play a longer game with this one. There’s too much we don’t know.”
You open your mouth, then close it. She’s right. There was something bone-chilling about the way he looked at you just now, but instead of feeling afraid, you feel something different. Curiosity. Fascination.
Not for the first time—or the last—you feel drawn to him.
Tumblr media
König’s been antsy lately.
You’ve gotten quite good at reading his moods, even when he’s wearing the hood. The rest of his body betrays him: his shoulders are tense, and his fingers are constantly toying with a phantom knife. He prefers to be fidgeting with an actual one, but it tends to make him too intimidating for that to be practical.
You’ve taken Calliope’s advice and taken to studying your target rather than trying to end him and be done with it. There’s a lot to notice, which is surprising: you’d taken him for some mindless hulking brute upon first impression. It’s clear that he’s intelligent, with a cunning quickness to his thinking that both impresses and chills you.
Shame he’s still as much of a raging pervert as he was in the beginning, though.
“You know, I wasn’t sure about you in pants at first, but now I think you should wear them more often,” he says, surprising you during target practice. He startles you enough to throw your shot off, the arrow clattering uselessly to the ground below the target.
“Can I help you?” you demand, giving him a venomous side eye.
“Not at all, princess. Just admiring the view.” He leans against a nearby post, watching your confused expression. It takes him shifting his gaze downward for you to realize what he means.
“Ugh!” Without hesitation, you nock another arrow and shoot it at him, aiming right between his eyes. He dodges it, of course.
“You can’t expect me to marry a pretty woman and not look at her,” he says smugly.
It’s an unfamiliar situation, being desired. You don’t have much experience with this sort of thing: not only are you the king’s daughter, but you tend to give off a chilly, hyper-competent aura that keeps men with fragile egos away from you. You’ve only had one encounter with a man: a shy kiss behind the stables, featherlight touches that sent tingles through your whole body.
König has never touched you, but the way he looks at you is enough to make you blush. You should be indignant, but instead you find you don’t mind all that much.
“Why are you bothering me?” you say instead of responding to what he said.
“Bothering you? I’m hurt,” he says, placing a hand over his heart as if you’ve physically wounded him. “I came to inform you of my departure.”
“Your what?” you ask, gawking at him. “Where are you going?”
“Do you remember that man who came to tell us about the beast?”
“You mean the man who attacked me? I’d forgotten,” you say drily.
“Your wit is as alluring as ever,” he responds. “I’ve decided to enlist the help of the most competent man I know to deal with the threat.”
“And who would that be?”
“Me, of course.”
You shoot him a confused look. “You’re leaving to deal with something personally?”
“It’s too perilous of a problem to continue throwing my men at,” he says, taking on a more serious tone. He’s toying with a knife again: a hefty, aggressive-looking thing with a jagged edge. “If you want something done, you need to do it yourself. Or at least lay eyes on the problem yourself.”
“You’re not worried at all about dying and leaving your throne empty?” you ask disbelievingly. This is beyond reckless, verging on foolish.
“Don’t start,” he sighs. “I just got out of a hours-long meeting with my advisors. Anything you could say to me, they’ve already told me a dozen times. It won’t change my mind.” One look at him tells you he’s dead serious, and won’t be persuaded otherwise.
“Well, when do we leave?”
“We?”
“Yes, of course. I’m coming with you,” you say, puzzled at his confusion.
“You are not.”
“Yes, I am.”
“It’s too dangerous. And besides, the journey won’t be pleasant. I’ll be traveling without guards or servants.”
“Why on earth not?”
“Too much of a hassle. I’ll get there faster if I’m traveling alone. Emphasis on alone. Besides, I would prefer not to be sending any innocents to their deaths.”
“You’ll need someone to watch your back.”
“And you think you qualify?”
“Yes!”
He chuckles at your indignant tone. “With all due respect, my queen, I doubt you could take care of yourself out there, much less be of use to me.”
You wish he wouldn’t call you that. It makes your chest feel strange. Which isn’t helpful when you’re getting mad at him for doubting your competence.
“If you go alone, you might not come back,” you retort. “If I come with you, I can ensure you don’t come back.”
He looks at you, startled, and proceeds to let out a hearty laugh. “You are full of surprises,” he says. “It won’t be like a vacation, you know. We’ll have to travel light.”
“I can handle that.”
“I’m sure you can. The question is, can you handle whatever beast those villagers are so worried about? You may not worry about my wellbeing, but I would worry about your own first.”
“You don’t think I can hold my own?”
“To be honest? No.”
“Then let me prove myself.” You step right up to him, so close that your face is nearly pressed to his chest. God, he’s so big. And broad— “Let me show you I can hold my own in a fight.”
A sly smile crosses his face. “Alright. Let’s spar.”
You blink. “Excuse me?”
“Let’s. Spar.”
“You want me to fight you?”
“What were you expecting?”
“That’s not a fair fight.”
“You came here to kill me.”
“Assassinations don’t usually happen during prearranged one-on-one fights.”
“Touché. But I’m not asking you to beat me. If I think you’re competent, then you can come along.”
“This is ridiculous.”
“I actively do not want you to join me, mind you.”
You let out a quick, angry breath through your nose. Infuriating. “Fine. I’ll do it.”
“Excellent. I’ll see you after lunch, then.”
You turn away from him and trudge over to a tree to pick up some fallen arrows. “What’s the rush? Are you leaving so soon?”
“Tomorrow morning, in fact. Just before dawn.”
“I can wake up that early.”
“No need to put the horse before the carriage here. If you’re going.”
“I’m not concerned.” You bend down to pick a few arrows out of some scrappy tough grass, and when you straighten, König is right there, looming over you like a threatening shadow.
“What—” You gasp as the knife König was fiddling with rushes past your face and embeds itself in the tree trunk behind you.
“I don’t think this is quite getting through to you, so I’ll only say this once,” he mutters darkly, leaning over you to whisper directly into your ear, his hand firmly gripping the knife above your head. “You have nothing to prove to me, and I don’t know what you’re trying to do by insisting you come with me. If you change your mind now, we need not speak about this again.”
You glare up at him. “You’re not going to change my mind. And it’s quite suspicious that you’re trying to.”
“Is it really so difficult to believe that I’m concerned for your welfare?”
You don’t understand him. Being this close to him isn’t helping you think straight, either. There’s no other way to describe it, but it’s almost like you can feel the intensity radiating off him. He smells like pine needles and lye, and some distinctly manly musk that you don’t dislike. And when he’s up close like this, you can see every detail of his eyes, the green streaked with blue and brown.
“It would be easier if you weren’t,” you whisper.
He snorts. “Don’t I know it.” Before you can process what the hell he means by that, he’s pulling his knife out of the tree and stalking off, suddenly in some sulky mood.
You stare at the deep mark left in the bark, wondering what just happened.
Tumblr media
“Again,” calls the swordsmaster.
You scramble to your feet, exhausted and sore. “This isn’t fair,” you whine. You’re twelve years old, and the man who’s been teaching you how to fight has just dropped you for what feels like the millionth time in a row.
“How so?”
“You’re bigger than me!” you pout. “And far stronger.”
“That isn’t always an advantage, you know,” he says, doing a flourish with his practice sword that you vow right there and then to master someday.
“How? That’s all fighting is. It’s just big people beating up the little people.”
“Being smaller just means you have to be nimbler.” He gestures for you to come at him again. “Don’t focus on trying to hit me in the chest. Use your size to your advantage and focus on weak points.”
You brandish the practice sword again and ground yourself, steeling yourself with a deep breath before charging. You go for the knees, smacking them so hard that they buckle, bringing your instructor down with a shout.
“I did it!” you beam proudly.
“A little unorthodox, but the job is done,” he pants. “Remember, there is no decorum when you are fighting for your life. It is imperative you intuit your enemy’s weak points and exploit them. Even the strongest enemy can be brought low.”
You nod with determination. “Always go for the knees.” That draws a laugh out of your instructor.
There’s something deeply unnerving about the way this man moves.
König is so big, but he doesn’t move like it. The way he paces reminds you of a big cat: all intimidation and quiet, deadly strength on light feet.
“I’ll let you make the first move,” he says with a crooked smile. He looks deliciously rumpled, the sleeves of his shirt pushed to his elbows. You’re only looking at the swell of his biceps for tactical reasons, of course. Of course.
“How generous,” you reply. Without hesitation, you lunge at him.
He’s ready for you, of course. He matches you hit for hit, parrying you effortlessly. If you thought he was fast before, there’s something downright inhuman about it now. You doubt he’s even breaking a sweat.
He pushes you back, sliding on your feet a little. “Do you seriously have one hand behind your back right now?” you hiss.
“You’re as difficult to fend off as a feather,” he shoots back.
It’s like having a conversation, sparring with him. More than just the banter, of course. You trade blows, each unable to move in too closely to the other. He may be strong, but you’re fast. And you can tell you’re wearing him down.
“Getting tired, big boy?” you taunt.
“Of waiting for you to give up? Perhaps,” he grits out. “Don’t try my patience, princess.”
“I want to watch you squirm,” you respond. You watch as König’s eyes widen slightly. You jump at the opportunity, taking advantage of his moment of shock to knock him off balance and pinning him underneath you.
“That wasn’t so hard,” you purr as he pants under you. “Feel familiar?”
“Last time we were in this position, it didn’t end so well for you,” König shoots back. He can say whatever he wants, but you’ve visibly winded him.
“This time, I went for the knees.”
“Oh?”
“You have buttons that are very entertaining to push, your highness.”
“You little—”
It’s quick. One moment he’s pinned underneath you, and another moment some supernatural strength has him rapidly reversing your positions. He catches you off guard, and you spot a flash of blue in his eyes as the wind is knocked out of your lungs.
“Next time you have an enemy pinned like that, finish the job instead of crowing about your victory,” he hisses.
You wheeze a little before shooting him a coy look. “Struck a nerve, did I?”
“You are an infuriating little minx,” he says, visibly frustrated. He stands up, offering you a helping hand.
You take it, springing up with a little bounce to your step. “Well?”
“Well what?”
“Am I coming with you?”
He sighs in consternation. “I suppose you are.”
You give him a little pat on the face. His exposed cheek is warm underneath your palm as he looks at you with an indecipherable expression.
“Glad we sorted that out. See you at dinner,” you say sweetly.
You prance off without a look back. You could use a bath.
Tumblr media
MOOOOOOOM THEY'RE FLIRTINGGG
I started out unsure of how this chapter was going to turn out, as it's mostly just setup for the plot to get going. But I ended up having a lot of fun, and some pretty important things are set up in this. I hope you guys enjoyed it! Comments and feedback are of course always appreciated <3
@crowbird @poohkie90 @cumikering @iytatsworld @papaver-decervicatus @anxietyrain @riotakire @ax0lotly @cookiepie111 @kacchasu @no1runawaymilkdad @chthonian-spectre @backwards-readings @yxllowtxpe @garbau @hexqueensupreme @queenthorin1 @violetstyless @her-majesty-theking @vegan-peppermint @peonytarian @ghostslittlegf @euuuuuuun @e1x03 @kokonoiwife @deaddainish @dragonfang @teehee-47 @catluvwr @keiva1000 @waves-against-a-cliff @channelsoph @cutiecusp
318 notes · View notes
bcacstuff · 1 month ago
Note
Why have you decided to stay so quiet? Is it because you said there was no woman in the taxi when there was, or because you thought he was with Vikey when he wasn’t? We all make mistakes, and overall, you’ve done well. But staying quiet and letting others think they were right in their “fancy world” isn’t the best approach. Now, your blog is mostly just re-sharing Sam’s posts. Ultimately, it’s up to you what to do with your own blog.
Anons keep on nagging about this, I don't know what the big deal here is or why we have to go on about it at all.
No, I didn't see the woman when I posted the video. But I also didn't say there was no woman. All I said in a comment was that I saw him arriving alone, and that is still what I see.
I also posted the convo on Twitter, which confirms there was a woman in the car. It doesn't say the woman got out, it doesn't say it is a gf or anything. The Twitter account removed the video and post and is even now private. We don't have to have any doubts as to why that happened. (I just have to watch my inbox all week and I know enough).
There was no woman named Vikey, nor Vickey at play here, I told you about that. People with all the theories that start with 'but'... go ahead if you want to think otherwise, not me encouraging you and not me endorsing this.
I don't think I made any mistakes in this, the people naming women and having all kind of theories about who or what or in what compassion... are making the mistakes here imo. My simple conclusion was and still is, a woman is in the car, we don't know if she got out of the car, the video is cut at that point.
There was one Anon who mentioned something, most people probably didn't notice, which I think could have some merit. Anon observing how the passenger tried to get out of the car on the other side, but then another car passes. It is possible that the cab driver said something, then S, who first made a gesture as if he wanted to close the door, looked inside and we can see something what looks like the passenger moving towards the side where S got out of the car. But there it all stops, the video is cut. Only the people standing in front of the bar will know if the woman got out of the car or not.
Tumblr media
It's far to unclear to identify the women, other than dark hair we see nothing and it is very vague. So it's pointless to have an opinion about it. My opinion is as good as anybody's and actual I didn't even bother to draw conclusions or have an opinion about it.
If you're not happy with a blog that doesn't make up any stories, just to entertain you, I'm sorry. My blog is about facts we see, not about things we don't see. If there is nothing happening, nothing can be reported. Simple as that.
People are free to discuss things, we can speculate now and then as long as it is in a respectful way, I don't have to agree with them, nobody has to agree with me. It's all just a tv show and some actors at the end of the day.
Well, that's all I have to say about this, which to me is such a non-issue. I'm rolling my eyes at every Anon about it asking myself why on earth is this such a big deal. Needless to say this will absolutely be my last word on it.
46 notes · View notes
andoutofharm · 8 months ago
Note
Hi! I just want to bring up a concern of mine is that Fall Out Boy will be playing at Download Fest in June and one of the partners of Download is Barclays (an official BDS target specifically an exclusion and divestment boycott). I got reminded to check because another festival in the UK (Great Escape) happening in May has a lot of their lineup pull out when Barclays remains as a partner and/or signed a petition encouraging it to drop them (Check BDS’s Instagram). I just want to give a heads up and perhaps encourage to use our voices to make the band aware! Like with the whole Gabe situation, we should be able to hold them accountable/let them be informed/make it clear about our feelings.
I wanted to say something now, rather than have it be a whole thing blow up last minute or afterwards especially since nobody else has noticed yet or said anything. At least unlike what happened in March, we have two months ahead of time to tell them. Please anybody who plans on saying something, please don’t harass people! Obviously FOB are not the organizers of this festival, they don’t make the partnerships, I doubt they check who are funding these events, they are simply invited/paid to show, but they as a band should be aware of the fact one of the bigger partners of this festival is profiting and funding genocide and is considered a big enough target to be put on said boycott lists. Pressure and encourage FOB to drop their appearance and/or make a statement. Not only should this be about informing people we look up to and encouraging them to make moral choices, but also informing others about the cause and how many companies profit from Palestinian genocide!
FOB tends to respond to backlash and pressure pretty quickly ie: Pretending you know who was never on stage, never doing that whole NFTs thing, and pulling offensive merch. IK people will go to Meredith, but please remember don’t harass and act like she controls the band. She is an entirely separate person from the band. I get it, Meredith is the easiest person to get noticed from when it comes to being close to the band, but hold that responsibility over FOB’s head, not one of their wives. Anyways so sorry for this long wall of text, or if this ask of mine seems ridiculous and it’s not really a fun ask, I just wanted to say what I had in mind and be able to properly address concerns and hopefully see a change. Thank you. ❤️❤️❤️
Thanks for bringing this to my attention! Here and here are the posts on BDS’s instagram talking about the other festival this anon is referring to.
I don’t know what the best course of action is here/what the best way to contact them is/how to bring this to their attention so if anyone has any thoughts or input please weigh in!
112 notes · View notes