#never not going insane about them actually!
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scorpiosbite · 2 days ago
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actress!reader x drew starkey social media au
࣪˖ ִ𐙚 ────୨ৎ──── what you got up to, your first week in LA through social media.
𝜗𝜚 pairing: actress!reader x drew starkey
author’s note: these posts were made during actress!reader’s first trip to LA, so around august 2024 at this point of actress!reader and drew’s relationship timeline, they’ve hooked up once and went on a date together. actress!reader is going to remain in LA for the time being to film her new movie ‘anora’.
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yourusername
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liked by drewstarkey, madelyncline, bellahadid and others
yourusername swore i’d never like LA… still don’t, fucking love the people tho
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madelyncline second pic of us omg, we’re so sexy
yourusername come sit on my face
tayrussell damn you’re so hot
yourusername bending over rn
mimikeene i miss you bby come back to london
yourusername i miss you more wifey
alexademie mother
yourusername mwah baby
bellahadid y/n active era? we prayed for times like this!!
yourusername no promises baby
kendalljenner body so tea it’s insane
yourusername says you babes
y/nstitties HOLD ON Y/N HANGING OUT WITH MADELYN DOES THIS MEAN SHES MET THE REST OF THE CAST??!???
targaryenstan yea, paps got pic of her and obx cast at a club
rafeswhore DREW IN THE LIKES I REPEAT DREW IN THE LIKES
y/nsno1fan HE NEVER LIKES PEOPLE’S POSTS, I SHIP!!!
sitonmyfacey/n i’m beating my shit to this rn
sitonmyfacey/n just came, 10/10 nut
ilovey/n she’s so mommy, but so daddy
visenyasdragon FUCK SHES ACTUALLY POSTING!!!!
drewsballsack DREW IF YOU SEE THIS HOP ON THAT MAN!!!! SHE SO FINE #NEEDTHAT
tmz
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tmz Y/n L/n and Madelyn Cline seen arriving at an downtown LA club this past weekend, the two stars were seen partying with the rest of the Outer Banks cast, with the Game of Thrones star seen getting hot and heavy while dancing with a particular man.
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y/nvisenyatarg WHO????! WAS IT DREW?!? PLEASE PLEASE LET IT BE DREW!!!
starkeystan OMG PLEASE YES I SHIP SO HARD!!
y/nismother WAIT WAS IT DREW??!! cause i’ve been shipping them ever since maddie said in that interview that she made the cast watch GOT and drew blushed when she mentioned y/n and they way they both say their honoured when complimented is soulmate shit
y/nsspinetat I SAW PEOPLE TALKING ABOUT THAT ON TT
daddyy/n my friend was at the club it was drew
y/nismother HOLY SHIT
daddyy/n yea, they were grinding and apparently left together
y/nsspinetat NO HE STOLE MY GIRL!!!!
y/nnews
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y/nnews Y/n will be living in LA for the next few months while she films her new movie “Anora” by director Sean Baker, the film rights have been purchased by A24
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y/natoenails damn i’m so proud of her
randomuser she fucking killed it on the first season of GOT, can’t believe that was her first acting gig, im so excited to see her do this film
y/nfan what’s her character like in this?
y/nmylove shes a stripper
y/nfan oh im gonna flood that theatre
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TAGLIST: @sunnybunnyy2 @percysley @wearemadeofstardust0 @idgasb @pinkpantheris @emmaaas-posts @grace-sully
ok, here's the first instalment of the social media au of actress!reader x drew starkey enjoy and let me know what you think!!!
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kaelidascope · 3 days ago
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On one hand, I'm relieved to see that it isn't just me suffering in the engagement department whereas I used to get flooded with comments and the like every time I dropped something. It isn't the only reason why I've moved from fanfic work to original work, but it is part of it. The last round of engagement on the latest MM chapter was abysmal, and while I know it's not a reflection of my quality in writing, I kept beating myself up over the possibility that I took too long to update it and people gave up on it/forgot/fell out of love with my work because I as a creator was not performing good enough. It drove me into a bit of a depression for a while.
On the other hand, this is making me rethink my stance on never telling my favorite authors how much they have inspired me to take off with my writing career. This is going to get a little lengthy but I want to talk about it so bear with me here.
Closed circles know how much of an insane, unhinged fan I am of certain writers, yet I have never actually said a word to them. I think I left one comment on maybe two fics that went unanswered (which is fine. They're not active in the fandoms I'm in anymore and I'm just some guy out of probably hundreds all saying the same thing. They're not gonna reply to me) but apart from that, you wouldn't catch me dead actually admitting how much the works mean to me. But why?
I guess I was far too proud and too terrified of being let down if I exposed myself like that. Despite the fact that these authors were literal catalysts for borderline impossible feats I have done within the last year, WELL RECEIVED FEATS at that, I swore I'd never tell anyone how inspiring they were for me. (Unless a casual friendship has been established. I have had the tremendous honor to able to talk to some of my inspirations one on one but under incredibly lucky circumstances)
I had a scenario in my head that these were the cool kids, and if you ever got picked on at all for admiring anything, you know damn well you never tell the cool kids about your admiration. I was afraid that they'd take one look at the work that was inspired by theirs and laugh at it in their enclosed circles. I wasn't going to risk having my confidence crushed and lose the motivation to continue working on my projects by being a fan.
I know not all authors do this. Every time someone comes to me and tells me I've inspired them to be a better writer, I literally frame it in a collection of screenshots I have saved on a hard drive. Every. Single. Time. And I know anyone else would tell me that if the person I admire would actually be cruel enough to mock an up and coming writer, then they're not worth admiring. Which I agree with! But try telling that to sensitive little Kaeli that safeguards their interests with the fiery defensiveness of a feral bear on cocaine.
But then I see posts like this, and I put myself in their shoes. I don't know them. They could be a jackass but they could also be like me - someone who bases a lot of motivation for project completion based off of whether or not people even care to see it completed.
This is all a very long, round about away to say that who cares if the author you build a mini-shrine for in your brain thinks your cringe for liking their work? Odds are they probably need to hear that you liked it so much, it inspired you to do something with that feeling. We all need to hear it. They inspired you and now you're making something that will inspire someone else. To be a creator is to share that passion everywhere you go. There's nothing cringe about it.
A writer friend told me something that broke my heart a little bit today; they're going to quit publishing their fanfic.
My instant thought was that they had been trolled or attacked or that something terrible had happened in their life because this person is so passionate about their writing. It wasn't any of that. Engagement with their works has been going down, as it has for many of us. Comments are like gold dust a lot of the time, and just looking through the historical comment counts on old fics on ao3 demonstrates this trend very clearly. It was not simply the comments dropping off which caused them to decide to stop posting, however.
My friend came across a discord server for their fandom (I should point out here that their fandom interest and mine diverged a couple of years ago, we stay in touch but don't currently read each other's posts because I'm not into their fandom and they would rather gouge their eyes out with a wooden spoon than read anything Star Wars) and specifically to share fic in that fandom. They joined, because we all love a good fic rec, only to discover that their latest multichapter fic, which has almost no comments and very few kudos, is being hotly discussed in this server as one of the best stories ever. Not one of these people has bothered to say this to them on the fic. When they asked, none of participants could see the point in telling the author of the fic they apparently loved so much that they love it.
This discovery has absolutely destroyed my friend's love of sharing fic. They share because they love seeing other people's enjoyment, and fic writers do that through comments and kudos/reblogs/likes because we don't get paid. There is no literary critic writing a blog post/article about how amazing the story is for us to copy and keep/frame. There is no money from royalties. All we have are the words of the people reading our works.
Those people on that server could have taken five minutes of the time they spent gushing about how amazing my friend's story was to other people and used it to tell the one person guaranteed to want to hear that praise how much they loved it. They could have taken a moment to express their opinion to the person who spent hours upon hours plotting, writing, editing, and posting those chapters. Instead, they deprived my friend of thing that keeps them sharing their writing, and in the process have killed their love of it. My friend now feels used and unmotivated.
I won't be sharing a link to their fic, they said I could share their experience but not their identity. I know they plan to post one final chapter. I know they intend to express their hurt at being excluded from the praise for the thing they created, and I know they intend to announce that as a consequence they will not be posting for a long while, if at all.
So please, I beg you, don't hide your love of a story from the writer. It's just about the only thing we have.
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wingedshadowfan · 3 days ago
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⚠️arcane s2 spoilers⚠️
i just saw someone say "vi put on a uniform for caitlyn but caitlyn never took hers off", even going as far as saying that caitvi shouldn't have ended up together bcuz they have the dynamic of "oppressor and oppressed". tell me you've never paid attention to a single thing caitlyn's done or said in either season without telling me😭😭 (this is my nth post abt this bcuz it pisses me off when ppl mischaracterize her so when you see underlined text, it's linked to a more detailed post)
are we forgetting when she traded her weapon, her gun, her only protection away for a shimmer/medication/potion thing w/ that fucked up undercity dude with the glasses (the one who became the first of the glorious evolution) for vi and hugged him as thanks?
when she saw ekko's commune, his tree, and validated ekko's feelings about piltover and enforcers but also told him the cycle of violence needs to be broken because the undercity needs healing - something ekko could understand even in his anger and hurt.
when she confronted her own parents abt how the government doesn't care about zaun and the situation there, and then took it straight to the council. when jayce, her literal childhood best friend and basically a brother to her, now a councilor, ASKED HER IF SHE KNOWS WHO MADE ONE OF JINX'S BOMBS AND SHE WENT "no, well, uh-" because vi held her hand. she asked him, in front of everyone, "what happened to you" when he suggested using hextech to invade zaun.
even when vi got sick of trying to change things through the council, caitlyn kept telling her there must be another way and they just needed to make a new plan. oil and water, vi said, and that she was stupid to think it would work, but caitlyn's response was, what about us? what about the actual people, not their value as representatives of a group, a stereotype, one of many indistinguishable units? we aren't oil and water.
ppl say she used to view zaunites as just "creeps, crooks and villains" and after seeing more from them through vi, she changed it to "innocent helpless victims", which obv is dehumanizing since you don't recognize a person's capability for both good and evil and only see them as a stereotype. but she's always recognized both kinds of people exist in the undercity and that being "good" or "bad" isn't that simple. ppl seem to be mad she didn't try and dismantle piltover's entire police force like that would be possible or a solution to zaun's problems. she has a strong moral compass and a sense of justice - innocents should be protected and criminals prosecuted, zaunites or topsiders. if you steal, you should go to jail. but when you come from the dark alleys of zaun and poverty and deprivation is all you know, you're way more likely to steal, and when enforcers are prejudiced against you, you're more likely to face excessive violence and maybe serve a longer sentence. and this is why she tells the council that there are good people down there, that there is rampant poverty, famine, a drug problem, etc. her focus is on the daily humanitarian struggles of the average people.
you guys will twist yourselves in knots to make excuses for jinx, justify her actions and forgive her for what she's done (when she literally, aside from murdering a bunch of people and destroying a fuckton of stuff because she was insane, unstable and uncontrollable, literally directly prevented zaun from getting sovereignty by blowing up the council) but you don't recognize caitlyn's entire change in character started when jinx tried to blow her up multiple times, kidnapped her, tried to get vi to kill her, blew up the council killing her mother and then (this wasn't jinx but caitlyn doesn't know that) turned the councilor memorial statue reveal to a massacre. see: this very accurate post.
"caitlyn never took her uniform off" well maybe because she was scared of jinx, paranoid, angry, grieving her mother, seeking justice and buckling under the pressure of becoming head of house kiramman. perfectly normal reactions considering the circumstances. she even acknowledged to jayce how upsetting it was to realize this hate she harbored for jinx had started to undo a lot of the work she did towards understanding the undercity and zaunites better and seeking to help them. but i believe she thought jinx was a hazard to them too.
i have a whole other post diving into this, as well as why she wanted vi to "put on a uniform" (temporarily until they caught jinx, and not just bcuz she thought vi was "one of the good ones" but bcuz she wanted her close, under her protection and equipped w/ all resources and privileges available to piltover, not to mention ppl are seriously undermining the fact that vi played a role in that conflict too) and why she made the mistake of going too far in her pursuit of jinx - most notably becoming rougher and jailing people, poisoning the air as a battle tactic, endangering isha, hurting vi, assuming the commander position and pursuing jinx even harder. but this post isn't about that, it's about other ways in which she metaphorically took off her uniform, and even the way she wore it.
caitlyn wasn't happy as a commander, she wasn't going on a power trip, she didn't "become a dictator all too willingly" like ppl are saying. and yes, that doesn't mitigate the damage she did to zaun but she had clear goals she was pursuing, none of which involved harming innocents (but protecting them), and she even confronted ambessa when she thought her right hand was out of line, which caused tension between them. though blinded by a desire for revenge, she remained concerned with the undercity's state and realized ambessa was manipulating her, even saying something like "why is peace always a justification for violence?" to her. the cost of what she was doing was too much for her. all things considered, commander caitlyn wore her uniform in the best possible way.
and she took it off as soon as she saw what was on the line. vi's father turned monster would go berserk when injected by singed, innocents would be ripped to shreds, and he'd be captured and used as a weapon by ambessa (against the undercity or whomever). for all of these reasons, caitlyn betrayed ambessa. she double crossed her, and the way she acted it out matters, not just because vi, who she'd decked the last time she saw, called her "cupcake". but because it was the right fucking thing to do.
i have a separate post about caitlyn's implied guilt about the things she'd done, about her knowing she couldn't undo those mistakes. this is what made her so desparate to try to make up for them that she not only send the guards away so vi could free jinx (another brilliant analysis here), but it also resulted in the way she fought ambessa tooth and nail alongside mel - like she had a death wish. she, a sniper, sacrificed her eye so she could remove ambessa's talisman by cutting it free with the dagger she took out of her own side. and even in the very end, when she asks vi if she's still in this fight, it could be interpreted as the fight for zaun too since she gave sevika, a zaunite, an ally of jinx, her mother's councilor seat.
so don't fucking talk to me about how she "never took her uniform off" for vi, when she's done that so many times metaphorically (and their last scene is literally one of the very few in the entire show where she isn't wearing any insignia), and she's done it for zaun too. and maybe even more so than that - it's how she wore it that matters. what she did with her privilege and her power - her character and agency.
season two is at fault for mismanaging the piltover/zaun conflict and not focusing on it enough in its latter half, as well as also not showing any proper longer caitvi conversations that might've taken place, in favor of... glorious evolution alien robots??
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mythalism · 15 hours ago
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in my rook hating mindset now after that post this morning and cannot stop thinking about how they are literally the worst protagonist maybe in any story i have ever experienced JRHGKJERHGJERG. and like if you love your rook i am not saying you shouldn't. if you love your rook i am so so happy for you genuinely but you are also probably brilliant and have a huge brain because what the game gives you to build off of is so abysmal.
i literally cannot stop thinking about how insane it is that rook literally causes a double blight and worldwide catastrophe on a scale which thedas has not seen probably since the creation of the veil itself and just. experiences no remorse. and the story tries to tell us thats a good thing and makes them better than the villain/their foil. JHREGJKHERGJKHERG. HELLO?!!??!?!?! literally no one ever goes "hey maybe you shouldnt have done that" except solas and hes framed as the VILLAIN!!! WHAT!!!!!!!!!! hawke blames themselves for not putting the pieces together fast enough when a bouquet of white lilies arrived at their door? the narrative gleefully condemn anders with the immediate opportunity to kill him for his crimes. nearly every single character in origins immediately puts the entirety of the responsibility for the fifth blight on loghain's shoulders, regardless of the CLEAR SUGGESTION that the battle at ostagar could never have been won. and all of these makes sense for the world and characters!!!!! of course hawke would blame themselves for their families deaths when they were given the role of protector by leandra after malcom dies. of course the city of kirkwall is going to want anders dead for his extreme act of violence rather than start the uncomfortable process of acknowledging the beloved chantry's complicity in large scale abuse happening in the mage circles!!!! of course alistair and the warden are going to blame loghain for the blight and cailan's death!!!! it doesnt matter if they are right or wrong, it makes sense for their perspective and worldview to feel this way!!!!
have yall gotten the low approval conversations in inquisition????? solas's "Inquisitor. Tell me. How does it feel? Being you. Are you blissfully unaware or, deep inside, is some part of you banging on the walls, screaming?" cassandra getting drunk and practically spitting in your face how she regrets raising you up to such power? blackwalls' "Are you proud of yourself, of what you’ve built here? How about the lives you’ve destroyed along the way? Given much thought to those lately? Is this Inquisition all you wanted it to be? Because I’m disappointed. All I see is a gang of thugs led by a self-serving tyrant." and these SCATHING comments from those who once believed in the inquisitor enough to join their cause come from decisions that affect a fraction of the population that dies under the southern double blight. people will rip the inquisitior to fucking shreds when they fuck up. THATS THE ENTIRE POINT OF THE TRESPASSER DLC EHRGKJHERGKJHERG. like holy shit every decision carries the weight of "oh my god whos gonna hate me. who is going to die because of my choice. how is this going to come back to bite me." have we forgotten what its like to return to varric after leaving hawke in the fade and confess what we did? the call we just made? to look him in the eye and tell him that we sacrificed his best friend? WHY IS ROOK NEVER ASKED TO PARTICIPATE IN ANY OF THIS INTROSPECTION?????????? TO EVALUATE HOW THEIR DECISIONS AFFECT THOSE AROUND THEM BOTH PERSONALLY AND SOCIETY AS A WHOLE????? OH MY GODDDDD
the regret prison scene is so insane. first its insane because its solas at his best and most cunty. but secondly it makes no fucking sense even if im largely distracted by pookie being fun and villainous. solas tries desperately to play up rook's regrets during their conversations and we are supposed to believe that it was that manipulation that allowed him to swap with them in the prison. how does this actually work? blood magic? dont worry about it, kitten. but then when we get into the prison.... the only two regrets that manifest are things that just happened within the last 3 hours - your two party sacrifices. lets be clear that these are not even real sacrifices because literally all of these people volunteer to go and then argue about why they should go. this is so fucking stupid. then rook looks at the statues and says "i dont regret this because this was your choice". YEAH????? OF COURSE YOU DONT FUCKING REGRET IT WHY WOULD YOU. HELLO???? THIS WAS NOT ROOKS CHOICE THIS WAS ROOK JUST SAYING "SURE I GUESS". AND THEN THATS ENOUGH! THEY JUST LEAVE BC THEY CONQUERED THEIR REGRETS!?!?!?!?!??! WHAT!!!!!! there is no discussion of rook being responsible for the blight in the south that we find out via ooc inquisitior letter has KILLED LITERALLY EVERYONE. no suggestion that their recklessness and willingness to act WITHOUT ALL THE INFORMATION at the ritual is the reason for every single thing the evanuris do following their release.
and let me be very clear bc i know this was causing drama on twitter last week. i am not saying the double blights is rook's fault. i actually dont think it is their fault, although i do think they are stupid and reckless and shouldn't have acted so carelessly. but although rook is responsible for ghilly and edgar breaking free, rook is not responsible for the their actions following that freedom, and rook is not at fault for being put into an impossible situation (the need to stop solas's ritual) without all of the information on what the ritual was and what stopping it might incur. however, the double blight is rook's fault in the same way that the veil, the fall of the elvhen empire, elven mortality, and every demon's existence is solas's fault; which is to say, it is and it is not. solas was backed into a corner, in a desperate situation without knowledge of the potential consequences, and was forced to make a decision for the good of the world when he imprisoned the evanuris and blight with the veil. rook was backed into a corner, in a desperate situation without knowledge of the potential consequences, and was forced to make a decision for what they thought was the good of the world when they interrupted solas's ritual. but while solas feels immense guilt and responsibility for the choice he made, rook feels.... absolutely none. and the game tells us that... they're right? people should just not take accountability for anything? i will give credit where it's due here that varric's contribution to this scene is quite good and his line where rook tries to take responsibility for his death and varric says smth like "no, that was my own choice and you dont get to take that from me" is B A N G E R. WHERE WAS THAT ENERGY IN THE REST OF THIS FUCKING GAME!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?
THAT was the lesson solas needed to learn, not that his regret was wrong but that it was MISPLACED!!!!!!!!! and that is why it is mythal acknowledging that their burden is shared and not his alone is the culmination of his entire story and what finally allows him to move on. pride stands alone, wisdom seeks out the input of others to make an informed and wise decision. this is also why he leaves such breadcrumbs for the inquisitor (a high approval one, at least) because he respects their opinion and their input and their existence and the way they treat him turns him back into wisdom from pride. this is why a romanced inquisitor mentions his name being pride and how its possible that hes not even CAPABLE of changing his mind because it would be so against his nature, and he needs someone whose opinion he values to show him the way. his flaw is his SELF INFLICTED LONELINESS!!!!! NOT HIS REGRET. varric even fucking says this in some random banter you get with his ghost in the infirmary but im too lazy to go find it on my desktop. its something about how he sees attachments as a weakness rather than a strength. his pride causes him to take on responsibility that is not his, his wisdom -> pride corruption has led him to believe he is the only one capable of fixing the world's problems and he will destroy both himself and those he loves in the process. he asserts that he is just a man but is unable to stop making decisions for the world like a god.
THIS is the solas/rook foil that should have been: rook relies on their friends and that reliance is ESSENTIAL; after all, the neve/bellara and davrin/harding sacrifice is essential to win. in contrast solas refuses to rely on anyone, and this isolation makes him increasingly cruel. when he has no one to mirror the way a spirit should, he becomes Pride, too proud and too god-like. his attachments make him more human. he is terrified of depending on others and will kill them rather than risk the vulnerability of dependence after what it has done to him (mythal, felassan). he has to unlearn this avoidance and fear, he has to admit that there "could have been a better way" that someone else saw and he did not. he must learn that he does not have all the answers. he is not Pride. its NOT that rook doesnt experience regret and doesn't take accountability for mistakes while solas is trapped by his own regrets. the message we got instead is so incoherent. but it was SO CLOSE TO BEING GOOD. the bones of this are littered everywhere in both the game and in the datamined content and for some reason it just could not be brought together in a way that makes sense.
the message that rook is "right" and better for not having regrets is genuinely insane, especially when the "regrets" they have to conquer are literally just. other peoples decisions. the fact that rook has the audacity to say to solas that he could never escape the prison while they could so easily because he is trapped by his own regret as if rook is better than him is genuinely so fucking dumb it makes me want to claw my eyes out for having been forced to read it. rook sacrifices nothing and learns nothing. the sacrifices within the game belong to the characters that make them, rook does not order people to their deaths in the same way that solas or even THE INQUISITOR do. rook never is asked to grapple with the fact that they ACCIDENTALLY unleashed a double blight, no matter how good their intentions. WHY DOES NO ONE BLAME THEM FOR THIS???? regardless of if it is their fault or not, the objective truth of fault does not matter, what matters is that you make decisions and PEOPLE JUDGE YOU FOR THEM!!!!!!!!! THIS IS LIKE FOUNDATIONAL TO THESE GAMES JEHRGJKREHGJKRHG. this is what the entire game is about doing to solas. judging him. based on his choices. and the game clearly wants you to have empathy for him in the end. but its so OBVIOUS that the vessel for building up that empathy should have been ROOK EXPERIENCING THE SAME THING!!! THE SAME JUDGEMENT!!! THE SAME GROWTH!!!!! FEELING THE BURDEN OF THE WORLD ON THEIR SHOULDERS. FEELING THE DREAD OF GUILT AND SHAME AND REGRET. TRYING TO DEFEND THEIR INTENTIONS!!! I DIDNT MEAN TO I DIDNT MEAN TO IT WAS A MISTAKE!!!! LEARNING THAT THEY HAVE TO OWN UP TO IT BUT THEY ALSO HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO MOVE FORWARD!!!!!! HELLO!??!?!?!?! they BARELY even express remorse for the treviso/minrathous sacrifice, even when faced with neve/lucanis's anger they just go "a decision had to be made and i made it". well. YEAH? LIKE YEAH THATS RIGHT BUT HUMANS HAVE FEELINGS??? YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO BE A PERSON, NOT A BLANK SLATE VIDEO GAME PROTAGONIST!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ITS OKAY TO FEEL BAD!!!! YOU MADE A DECISION THAT RESULTED IN PEOPLE DYING. ANY HUMAN BEING WOULD FEEL BAD ABOUT THIS. ITS KIND OF FUCKING WEIRD THAT YOU DO NOT. HOW IS ROOK JUST BORN BEING OK WITH THIS. ITS SO ROBOTIC AND ARTIFICIAL LOL
rooks actions are such a clear, perfect parallel to solas putting up the veil and the guilt that haunts him afterwards that i KNOW it was intended that way and somehow it just got completely shafted. it literally feels like they did have a coherent parallel going and for some reason were forced to change directions last minute and thus we got some mish mashed barely cobbled together incoherent nonsense with clear echoes of its former self. instead rook has no flaws, makes perfect judgements at all time, has unconditional support from all of their friends who also make perfect judgements, are immune to making mistakes, and the message is its actually just really easy to not have regrets if you just choose right every time and refuse to take responsibility for anything as long as you had good intentions :D
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kurthummeldeservesbetter · 2 days ago
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jayvik headcanons because my heart is happy but also hurts.
these take place either in that special part of s1 act 1 where nothing went wrong with them yet OR in a special universe where nothing will ever go wrong ever <3
Viktor either talks endlessly or has periods of silence Jayce listens to every word and responds but also knows when it's just silent 'be together time".
Jayce talks a lot as well, but he'll start a subject, pause for a few hours, then continue on later as if he didn't take a break. Viktor fully understands this.
They are literally each other's worst hype man. the words "no, don't do that" have rarely been uttered in their lab. if they are it's about not eating/sleeping or something unrelated to science. these men are "yes, and" till the very end.
Heimerdinger laughs anytime someone is like "At least Talis has someone to calm him down now!" Because like. His assistant (who he should apologize to for not encouraging him more) is literally insane.
Jayce can charm the pants off of anyone in order to gain something, but only at a gala or function. Only works on the rich. He's gotten him and Viktor bigger labs, lots of funding, new things.
Viktor, however, either intentionally or unintentionally, gets free shit all the time from local owners/regular workers because his natural snark and calm demeanor (plus the looks and accent) have people eating out of the palm of his hand.
He's unaware his usual drink/breakfast order costs less then it should and is more portioned. A local bookstore owner gives him the best copies.
Viktor mentions Singed one time and Jayce was like. no wonder you failed lab safety three times. is like okay you're never seeing that man ever again.
Jayce is very artistically inclined. Musically or visually. He can sing (doesn't like to in front of many people) and sings often to only his mom, Viktor, and maybe Caitlyn. Has the best music taste. A bookshelf full of records.
Viktor is fantastic with kids to the point he has a mom fan club. (Some dads too). This is because he took over for a science lab for a week to help out an old colleague and by the end the back row was filled with parents just watching and listening because their kids were actually interested in school for the first time ever
Jayce....is awkward with kids. He likes them, but my man does not know how to deal. He likes babies because they're small and cute, will hold a baby all day. but toddlers and kids? what do you discuss with them? taxes?
both avoid older kids and teens like the plague though. it's understandable. have you meet a thirteen year old? scary.
Viktor didn't even notice until Caitlyn pointed it out (very coyly) that pretty much all the clothes and accessories he has are in Talis house colors. Jayce did it intentionally 100%.
Viktor wanders whenever theyre out traveling. Jayce blinks and suddenly Viktor is halfway up the road or a new item has caught his eye.
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anna-mellgren · 1 day ago
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I have been asked about my different experiences living in different countries a lot so I will share my thoughts here.
America: I partially grew up in the USA so I never experienced a proper culture shock in the USA because I was so young when we lived there the first time.  I just noticed the differences from Sweden instead. Americans are so friendly so any homesickness was always cushioned by that. I just accepted America for what it was but it is obviously a lot more conservative & religious than Sweden. Americans can be super friendly but sometimes that friendliness can be a little superficial… swedes are more reserved but more loyal instead when you get to know them well. Female athletics is more developed in the USA which I liked. I had a good school experience and probably had a more chill time than most people had in high school.
France: I only lived in Paris for 6 months and I mostly hung out with international students who were studying french so I am not sure I can give a super accurate opinion of france. I got to know a few french people through a friend and they were similar to swedes in a way… they are very liberal, they ride their mopeds, they like soccer, they have a healthy aversion towards religion, they are not huge fans of loud people etc. Parisians are very cosmopolitan people and I got on really well with the ones I got to know.  I know parisians have a reputation for being rude and they are rude to tourists lol but honestly, the amount of tourists in Paris is insane. Even I, as a foreigner, could get annoyed with them at times. I liked to run by the Seine river and tourists would try to stop me mid-run in order to take their pictures? Why couldn’t you find another tourist to do that for you when I am clearly running? I think the french are similar to swedes with being reserved but very kind and loyal once you get to know them. I think being reserved can sometimes come off as being rude if you don’t understand the culture. I got to know quite a few french people living & working in the swedish arctic... for some reason a good chunk of french people have ended up there. I think they really like the nature & the swedish tourism industry will hire french people because they get a good amount of french tourists who like to visit the arctic and someone needs to be able to communicate with the french as they are notoriously bad at english. I even know a few french people who have set up their own businesses in the swedish arctic. I am just glad more people are discovering the magic of the swedish arctic :)
Ireland: I think I suffered a big culture shock in Ireland. Before then I had a slightly naive/american view that european countries are more similar than they actually are? I think Ireland has to be one of the most extrovert countries in Europe while Sweden is probably the most reserved… so that is a clear cultural difference. I used to think americans could be chatty & loud but some irish people are like americans on steroids. Sweden is one of the most atheist countries while Ireland is one of the most religious countries in Europe. Sweden is probably the most liberal and Ireland is one of the most ~historically~ conservative countries in Europe. Ireland has become a lot more liberal recently but I think Sweden is farther ahead on certain things… especially when it comes to sexism & behavior between the sexes.
Ireland had a certain lad culture when I was there which was honestly a bit unhinged. I know there are bad apples in Sweden but I don’t think their bad behaviour is accepted in Sweden as it is in Ireland.  I think the lad culture at university is exacerbated by a lot of people going to catholic girls & boys schools while growing up so they don’t interact with each other as much as they do in mixed schools in sweden & the USA. It was like they didn’t know how to behave towards each other? The emotional intelligence just wasn’t there at times. The banter sometimes went too far and became bullying in my opinion. The way guys talked about girls really got on my nerves too…not about me specifically but just girls in general. I remember there was a girl in my course who slept with a guy and the stuff I saw written on social media and what was said in real life really shocked me. My one irish friend said it was just “banter” and I would say no… it was stone-cold misogyny/sexism. I would then be labeled as “someone who didn’t understand banter” but Ireland legalized divorce & decriminalized marital rape in the 1990s (which is actually insane) so to be honest I don’t think they have the upper hand when it comes to defining misogyny? Their humor is based on slagging each other off which is fine but I sometimes think people took it too far... I prefer swedish humor which is more based on self deprecation & is a bit similar to british humor.  I think I was not willing to adjust and that caused me problems but I think the school culture as a whole was more toxic compared to where I had lived before. I think I got a bit unlucky with a few people to be brutally honest and I don’t think my experience resembles Ireland as a whole but the culture was a bit harsh. I remember girls rating each other on social media with bitchy comments on their friends' pictures by writing “6/10”… people who were friends with each other? None of us look like Adriana Lima but why put each other down? Or make someone feel mediocre? Some girls were seriously vain and judgemental & I missed the strong feminist sisterhood I felt in Sweden or the sisterhood I felt in sports in America. To be clear, many irish girls were genuinely nice & perfectly fine human beings but a few definitely gave off the vibe that I belonged with my fellow foreigners in the course. Every time I kissed a guy there would be random guys taking pictures of me and post it god knows where? Guys I didn’t even know? Just to gossip or slutshame me for kissing someone? They did this to everyone, not just me. Fairly certain people couldn't care less if I ever kissed a guy in Sweden or the USA.
People in my course made facebook groups and wrote mean things about people who were not in the groups… just things like that. I came from a super laid-back enviornment with very opened-minded people so I had a hard time adjusting to this harsher, sometimes hostile, environment. I don’t think I was a specific target but I didn’t feel comfortable there. One day I was walking down the street and a passing car threw eggs at me?  I have pretty good eyesight so I saw the ex-girlfriend of a guy I knew in the car…I think I got hit because I had kissed him a few months before. Stuff like this just doesn’t happen in Sweden. I lived in a smaller city and maybe I would've been happier in a more cosmopolitan place like Dublin. I think there are many great people in Ireland but I found the university culture to be very gossipy, mean, judgemental & cliquey. They all thought it was normal but it rubbed me the wrong way. Looking back I think some people were just immature and have probably changed a lot. To be fair, I never gave it a real shot because I was unhappy and struggling with autoimmune issues. Not all people were like this but when you find yourself in a place where you don’t know anyone and a few people treat you in a very bad way then it can have a big impact. I think people matured with the years and chilled out a bit to be fair but I never experienced it because I left. I have met many great irish people so in a way I just think I was unlucky and perhaps would’ve had a different experience if I stuck it out. Not all people were bad in my course either, the majority were perfectly fine people but I think initially the people who had lived in this city their entire life were unbothered with making friends or being friendly. I think they branched out later on. I think I had lived in a bubble before then and I had just never experienced anyone mean before? Which is probably a bit bizarre too, to be honest. My school experience before then was people being either nice to me or neutral… like I was just another human on planet earth.  In my honest opinion, I think some irish people are like Conor Mcgregor and truly embrace lad culture but there are also plenty of irish people who are salt of the earth and have the same aura as Cillian Murphy. From day one I never understood how anyone could fancy a huge twat like Conor Mcregor when there are men like Cillian Murphy, Francesco Totti & Henrik Lundqvist roaming the earth.... people need to get more cultured. I feel quite bad for the irish people who were embarrassed by Conor waiving the irish flag around the globe. I would even say the majority of irish people are like Cillian Murphy & have the same values as him. I think Ireland has a unique culture, people are generally friendly despite my experience & the nature is beautiful. My mental health suffered that year and I moved home which was definitely the right decision for me. I should’ve been more social but I didn’t have the mental or physical strength with my anemia. I knew a norwegian girl in ireland who seemed to love everything about it and I always compared myself to her. I felt like a bit of a failure for feeling like I did until I met a danish girl who had a far worse experience than me in Ireland and it was a bit comforting to know I was not alone in how I felt. I think experiences are subjective & overall I learned a lot. I don’t dislike Ireland or irish people at all, to the contrary actually… I just didn’t have a great experience. In a way, I think moving home to Sweden was a long-time coming. I have irish family these days and will probably visit Ireland from time to time for the rest of my life & generally I do think it is a nice country. No place is perfect.
Argentina: I think south americans in general are very welcoming and warm people. However- Argentina, like many other South American countries, have problems with corruption & crime etc but people are very loving. You will hopefully be fine if you just take some extra precautions but I think you have to be very mindful as a woman and be careful. Don’t get into taxis alone. Watch your drink on nights out. Don’t drink too much and always be in full control. Never leave a friend behind. Just stuff like that. I came to Argentina with limited spanish & lived with an argentine host family. All of my argentine classmates spoke terrible english which was great for me because I was forced to learn spanish. I was put in a class and the girls in this class took me in as one of their own. They brought me everywhere and I was their swedish mascot who just tagged along everywhere lol. I was treated really well and still keep in touch with them today. They said I was less shy after 5 months but it was not until then that I could understand what they were saying lol. Argentine families sometimes have limited means but they truly taught me the value of making the most of what you are given and making the best of what you have. I volunteered with handicapped children during my time there and these kids would correct my spanish non-stop which was great. My Argentine friends were too lazy to correct my grammar lol. I went running with a blind 14-year-old boy who had developed an eye disease just years earlier and I think this volunteer work really put life in perspective for me. Overall I had a great time in Argentina and I hit the jackpot because I spent my exchange year in patagonia. I had the classic experience of falling in love, traveling, going to school & just being fully immersed in argentine culture. My entire high school class came to wave me goodbye at the airport when I flew back to the USA <3 I will always look back at that year as one of the best years of my life. I think being an exchange student in high school is very different compared to being an exchange student at university. You’re still so young when you’re in high school and people are not as independent yet. You really get to experience family life, school life & the youth culture when you go as an exchange student in high school. I later lived in Buenos Aires for 6 months and studied at university during my gap year after living in Paris. I had a great time in Buenos Aires but I think my high school experience was more unique. I loved Buenos Aires though & the girls in my course would invite me to BBQs etc and I had a great time.
These are my experiences of my adventures living abroad. I would urge everyone to travel because nothing makes you appreciate home quite like living abroad. Or perhaps you will find a new home if the home you grew up in made you unhappy.
one thing about me……..i am hyperaware of the Vibes
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deesseshesca · 3 days ago
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PAC : Am I the only 'main character' they’re vibing with ? (18+)
Honestly ... idk.
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Pile 1
They are flamboyant individual . Babe they are not playing with you. They are not taking ‘’no’’ as an answer. Yes, they have a lot of options but all they see is you. You have no idea how tunnel vision they are about you. Is borderline obsessive.  Now the question is are they going to keep that energy when they have you ?
Am I the only 'main character' they’re vibing with ?
Yes. 
What’s the potential for drama vs. chill in this connection?
Drama 
Run. I know that type too well. They are going to do everything right until… they know they bag you. The fact that you are untouchable is actually what’s making them crazy. I feel like that person has a lot of experience. They fucked with a lot of people from all age range. Then there’s you. Mission impossible. I feel like y’all have a good relationship with dad, if not your dad card gets swiped. Y’all may have nobody in your DM. Nobody ever came your way to deal with you. You are sitting down looking at yourself  knowing you are not the problem. Face cards never decline, body is tea, nails stay done, you do your own hair. Especially the one that is dying their hair after a mental breakdown. You slay each color each time. It doesn't matter if you start the process at 2 am on a whim. You also do your own lashes or is a lash tech. Y’all also may be bald. Or you know  damn well that pussy is the goat. Even if you are a virgin. You know your cookie would have these man hooks like is coke. The second that someone is going to have a taste of it … they are going to lose their mind. You, them and I know you were never the problem. That’s why people keep saying they are intimidated by you because you look like you won’t take bullshit, you have your own motion and your money is long … so what’s up. Their dick in their pants … girl ! Anyway the only reason they want you is to prove to their lame friend group that they got an insane game. They are going to cheat on you, play in your face and make you feel so bad whenever you would want to discuss your feelings. You are too pretty for that mess … NEXT, THANK YOU !
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PILE 2
Am I the only 'main character' they’re vibing with ?
Yes.
What’s the potential for drama vs. chill in this connection?
Drama.
Is giving baby mama/daddy drama. The person you are dealing with is in love with you. They care for you, they show in  multiple ways. They keep texting you throughout the day. Always checking on you and the baby. Go to every appointment and even make sure you have more than enough money for the baby. They don’t just cover for the diapers, school books or clothes. They are paying for your hair, nails, clothes, food, and trip. Ask and they trick. They also like to spend time with you on a date without the kid. They love coming home and cuddling with you in front of a movie or one of your reality tv shows. They love touching you and making love to you. I feel like you want more. You want to be nastier. You want a pile 3 experience.  Your partner can’t see you under that light. Something about you being the mother of their kids now so everything changes. Back then y'all used to get down. You were doing splits on the dick, you were riding from the side, you were vocal because the speed they used to go was animalistic. The issue is he would give you  his left kidney but can’t be faithful for nothing. Not even God can come and ask that from him. They are out here clubbing and you are waking up lonely with a ‘’hey girly’’ text. You lost count of how many ‘’hey girly’’ texts you had. You stay with them because they are so loving and treat you like a princess. They are an amazing parent and you guys are a good team together but the cheating is insane. 
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PILE 3
Am I the only 'main character' they’re vibing with ?
No. 
What’s the potential for drama vs. chill in this connection?
Chill.
You know they are not only dealing with you and you don’t give a fuck. You are only there for the dick/pussy. They way they fuck is too good. You: I know ! Just  an insider; your boo thing is also dealing with his girl bff (yes… is time to have a gc meeting). Anyway you try all your sexual fantasies with them. Y’all love to use toys. He also buys you lingerie for some he also buys your weed or edibles. They will do what’s necessary to be in that wap and they quickly understand that you get nicer when you have a gift in your hand. They love to have their dick/strap come in and out of you. They love to have their fingers in your hole. Them: Is tight. Me: .. Sir/Miss please can I finish this reading in peace? You are the best they ever had. They love your face when you orgasm, they love to keep their face close to yours. They love swallowing your moans and kissing you. They love any position where they can hold you close. On the other hand, you prefer riding them, doing splits, teasing, giggling. You just like to feel and look like a pornstar that’s it. Y’all may film your experience and you act like is your personal Onlyfan. Ok Pile 2 gets nasty with it. Last insider: they would cuff you if you looked and acted like their bff because they are in love with your punani. I don’t even think you ever consider being with them. Just letting you know. So you don’t get dickmitize. 
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PILE 4 
Am I the only 'main character' they’re vibing with ?
Yes. 
What’s the potential for drama vs. chill in this connection?
Drama.
Pile 4 not y’all being the drama. Nah, zion do it, zion, zion. Out here looking around. Give your 4 walls a break and focus on me. (Not me rizzing up on the ipod (plz tell me you got that niche reference … anyway)). Your person is going through it. First you guys are recently single and you were in a confusing/toxic relationship. They were out here judging your body all the damn time. Telling you were too fat or saying they could not last long in bed because you were not pretty enough. Whole time they look like a drawing inspired by someone's drunk memory. The worst is y’all are gorgeous and you big tits are always sitting pretty. You have an hourglass figure and it is not about being slim or thick. Is about having a proportionate silhouette. Hair goals :  long and healthy have never been dyed. Y’all may have lip filler and is because of your ex but I think y’all recently took the filler out. Side note, y’all may look tall in your picture but you are actually very short.  Anyway your older brother bff is doing their best to keep their hands to themself. They have been crushing on you forever and everyone knows it except the brother and you. Like even the parents can sense a vibe. You love teasing them, maybe you guys started texting like y’all use too and there’s a lot of sexual double meaning. A lot of sexual tension between y'all. They are calling you little names and they claim they care for you. Have real feelings but you won’t allow yourself to fall for it. Because of your past and the fact that this is your brother bff… hello ! Stop giving them the fuck me eyes in family  settings. They already told you that but babe frl. Because next time they will pin you to a wall… I'm not joking. Relationship or not. You guys lowkey sext each other and you are always the instigator. You:want to see my new bras. Since they can’t resist … they expect just a picture of underwear nah is my girl milker in a beautiful colorful lace. Bye ! When they are drunk they love to text you and call you to sing their love to you . Everytime the next morning they come back nervous, hoping they did not  scare you off. Anyway Pile 4, I’m not the one to advocate for man peace but please put that man out of his misery. 
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alaskan-wallflower · 16 hours ago
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Hot takes (Musical)
very nervous-
i hate how soda was reduced to being basically a playboy/womanizer and wish they kept the conversation about pony and soda about how much he loves sandy and then adding something about the letter-i wish that he had the line about ‘stopping to smell the motor oil’ and then his actual verse in ggah was about the dx or cars or something that wasn’t just him hoeing around with women, especially since pony’s FIRST intro of soda is ‘my other brother suffers from a broken heart’ and the next song has him going after ace
I hate that two bit replaced steve in the musical and that steve was reduced to a character with a singular line about peas or whatever, which i don’t even remember because it was so irrelevant. i didn’t even know steve wa sin the musical until i followed them on insta and saw the vid of renni with the friendship bracelet from emma’s vlog
i wish ace had an introduction in the musical because to me, i had originally read the book and then the movie and THEN the musical, so when i first saw it i didn’t know who the hell ace was. i wish she had some sort of introduction because taht confused me a lot upon seeing it
i wish two bit and marcia had some action at the movies. i liked that part in the book with them and i wish they kept it
not a hot take but the show needs more coverage because some of the lengths these understudies have to go to is insane
fans should be more respectful to the actors because this musical has the most toxic fanbase i’ve ever seen, both in the outsiders community itself and the broadway community
i wish they kept the part from la jolla where pony was talking to johnny about his nightmares of his mom
i fucking hate deaths at my door so much
i actually like that they changed how dally died in the musical
i wish josh’s dally got more attention because people seem to only care about daryl tofa’s dally and only talk about his but never josh and josh is so talented and deserves to be talked about/portrayed in fanworks
we need more fanart of josh dally and renni steve
i actually really enjoy the costume pony wears with the faded will rogers shirt
i like that dally had a soft/nice side in the musical
brent comer was absolutely snubbed of a tony nomination
a lot of the characters feel watered down and the only character who actually got some substance was darry
they should’ve kept darry’s name as darry instead of darrel.
people need to be nicer to the actors and stop creating unnecessary drama because it’s tiring and lowkey drove me away from the musical fanbase
that’s all i have for now
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k1tty5 · 13 hours ago
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I would like to make it clear that I do NOT want anyone’s firstborns, but I will ramble. for you.
rambles about the process and other thoughts under the cut! I talk a LOT, so… view at your own risk?
I originally had this idea a couple months ago, I think when I first heard the song. I had made a little test for it, which I didn’t end up doing anything with because I thought it didn’t really make much sense. Which, I’m not sure I did that great of a job making this make sense, but you know. Whatever.
this is the original drawing i made for it back in early august, very rushed and not a big fan of it.
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I liked the black background & grayscale palette, as well as the way the string kind of . Twirls around the text? BUT, I went into this without any planning, mostly just me doodling and then threw the lyrics on for fun. No plot or whatever, very short.
After I made this, I was kind of just keeping this idea in mind for later, but I held back on trying to do it as I just wasn’t really sure where I wanted to go with it. I’m very bad at planning and tend to rush into things a lot, which ends up hindering the quality of a lot of my art. and since this was something I actually liked the idea of, I wanted to give it my all.
There was also the fact that because I liked the idea, I wanted the best outcome. This kind of ends up in a sort of paralysis where I don’t want to work on something because I’m not good enough for it, but I did realize that I will likely never consider myself good enough for it, so why not just go for it?
Anyway ,
I did not end up keeping the black background for the reason that I decided that this time around I wanted it to have a more traditional vibe/look? Like perhaps it was scrawled over some roughed up paper, hence the sketchy style and limited palette.
And as for why I didn’t keep the string looping around the pages, I just thought that would add too much red to the pages, sort of ruining the vibe. So I instead just kept it inside the panels!
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these are the original thumbnails/sketches! most of them I kept the same, but I did end up pretty much entirely changing the third page, because I decided there was already too many panels of just their faces with somewhat unsettled expressions .
thoughts on individual pages - don’t expect me to be organized or this to be well thought out, by the way,,
on page 1 ,
I started with a shot of the relationship, mostly to just… set the scene. I am NOT an expert on comics, and went into this with very minimal planning, so this work in general is more of the vibes than it is a storyline, but I did try to vaguely get it to resemble something comprehensible.
the second panel of Etho brushing Joel’s cheek is very much no thoughts for me lol, not very happy with how it looks. I do picture Etho as the more openly affectionate one (though i can see it both ways). BUT, to match with the lyrics, you could say that the first panel paired with “it’s hard to tell which elements of this are real” could be resembling that the boat is something tangible and physical, whereas the second panel paired with “and which are chemically enhanced” is referring to whatever feelings they have. Asking themselves if this is really real, or if it’s just the game.
no notes on the third panel lol. like i say this was not well thought out, the story is somewhat there, but it’s VERY much up to interpretation and I did intend it to be that way. I have ideas about what is happening, but I want to keep it up to the viewer.
on page 2,
“But it’s not easy to tell what I want from what I need” OH BOY !!! manic red joel. blinded by the bloodlust and rage and adrenaline. he needs this. he needs it, doesn’t he?
“I am more scared of myself than I am of anyone else” okay okay okay. I don’t headcanon he has any real remorse for killing anyone. this is a death game, you’re not meant to be a good person, this is built on lies and manipulation and blood and hurt. headcanon they’re all insane people doing bad things (with a forced hand or not). BUT !!! big fan of “i break everything i touch” kind of thing (its kind of a pattern in ships i like OOPS). so much angst. regretful of your violent nature, wishing to be gentler so that you can cradle his face without digging your nails into his skin, unwanting to break the only thing you’ve learnt to love.
but. etho doesn’t care !!! he doesnt care. his hands are just as bloody as yours, don’t you see?
on page 3,
panel one is just a continuation of the last scene which i just talked about blah blah blah
panel 2!! thats a portal. we all know what happened in the portal :)
on page 4.
ending the mini comic thing with the ship burning, while it started with a shot of the ship in its prime. before and after, how it started and how it ended.
all in all, I !! AM !!! INSANE!!! about them. I could ramble for hours probably but this is already long so ending with a couple final thoughts.
this is definitely meant to be set after they’ve gone red, when in that timeframe is up to you, though. in my vision the lyrics are kind of correlating to c!joel’s thoughts/feelings/whatevers, but it can definitely go both ways - or neither way lol. This song is really just like. THEM. To me.
anywho, thank you to anyone who has put the augh’s and ough’s in the tags, they’re very gratifying haha <3
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the simplest words
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semantics-error · 3 days ago
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Okay, once again I feel insane watching this. Everyone is screaming about how adorable and sweet it is for Kant to be jealous and how lucky Bison is......
Kant orchestrated the whole thing! He wasn't jealous, because Tawan was never an actual threat. There is no cuteness here!
He intentionally stood Bison up for hours and paid another guy to hit on Bison so that he could appear infatuated and worm his way into Bison's heart. But it's impossible to be jealous/possessive over someone when you know the third wheel isn't a threat (and you in fact paid them to be there!) so there is zero cuteness here, sadly.
Yes, I agree Kant wants to sleep with Bison again, it definitely rocked his world in a way that it did not for Bison (that moment where Kant was hyping up their first night together and Bison looked unimpressed made me giggle). But Kant's #1 motive for hanging around Bison is just for his mission. He says in the first 30 seconds of the first episode that he has no interest in dating and only does one night stands. He might want more of that dick, but he is fully playing at everything else.
I am, however, excited for next week when Kant gets desperate to break into Bison's home and makes this bet which we know is going to end up with some very fun BDSM and also some very tasty Kant learning he actually wants to give up control in bed. I think when Bison begins to reveal his actual preferences and Kant begins to actually cede the dominance battle and stop being such an alpha-male flirty himbo, then we'll finally see progress.
Bison will start to find some value in Kant besides a way to feel flattered and have a life outside of his job (Bison states in this episode that he just wants Fadel out of the way to live his life, not to date Kant), and Kant will start to become actually fond of our little psycho assassin and the freedom Bison gives him via giving up control. But I don't think either of those things have happened at this point yet!
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sabi0229 · 2 days ago
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BENRIUS HEAD CANNONS
HEAD CANNON TIIIMMMMEEEEEEE
CHAOS THEORY VERSION
Ngl i think put some CC stuff in here when this is only supposed to be CT.
Ben is really curious about darius's hair and always him different questions about how he takes care of it ,styles and washes it because he wants to do one date where he surprises him by doing his hair for him instead of Darius going to someone or doing his own hair
Ben can cook better than Darius
Darius bakes lots of stuff in his free time. Ben absolutely loves his baking
Darius wakes up in the middle of night because of nightmares and Ben will just be there for him hugging him the whole time. They'll go down stairs and watch movies till Darius sleepy. Once he is Ben carries him princesses style back to bed.
Ben would probably be the one to put Darius to sleep. Because of how stubborn Darius is and if he say he's not tired he will not go to bed but Ben will physically drag him into bed hug him and just hum songs until he falls asleep
They do arts and crafts as quality time
Ben's love language is physical touch
Darius is love language is giving gifts and talking also physical touch
Ben actually likes mint chocolate chip ice cream and Darius tried it once and he decided that he will never go near that flavor ever again
Darius's contact name in Ben's phone is not Dino nerd or Dino lover but angel from the baby dinosaurs in camp Cretaceous season 5 because Darius is personality reminded him a bit of angel so that's why his contact name is Angel
And Ben's contact number and darius's phone is rebel as an angel's brother because their personalities are so much because rebel was just very chaotic and energetic and so was Ben on the island and Darius is a sort of wanted to match too
When Ben got a new van he styled it the same way he did his old van but not as the exact same but there were similar qualities and there was stuff again in there like food in a boot and his pee bowl of licorice so Darius decided to put on gloves, a mask and get so much cleaning supplies that he cleaned out Ben's van throwed out anything disgusting and decided to give him silverware and dishes and tupperware for his van.( The van is dark blue btw)
Ben had a shark phase and would Yap about sharks like how Darius did dinosaurs and it made Darius fall in love with him even more.
Darius steals Ben shoes,clothes, and beanies
Ben has a ton of pictures of Darius in his phone / and the secret photo album
They would make out for hours ( their love for each other is like a flame that can't be put out.)
Darius visits his college and stays in his dorm for at least a week so Ben doesn't have to keep going to California
The longest they video called was for 5 days
Ben sometimes snores so Darius kicks him causing him to fall out of bed
Darius has a dog Ben has bumpy and a cat
They decided to move to a different house or apartment. Because even though the cabin is nice it was driving Ben insane being isolated for so long (and Darius even though he won't admit it) but they made the cabin their vacation home. To get away from people and a place for bumpy and her baby to live
Their home state/ city both starts with C ( California, Chicago)
Skin care routine
They decide to make out whenever their in danger for some reason
Bens van was their Hangout spot
Ben forgot what Darius was allergic to once and almost killed him.
Got engaged a few years after they saved Brooklyn
Fall wedding
Rock music x Pop music duo
One of them wears cherry flavored chapstick ( can you guess who)
After they got married Darius changed Ben's contract to 💗my idiot husband 💗
Ben changed Darius contract to Hot stuff😍 ( guys we all know he would do this he's silly)
Darius only wears his boxers and Ben's oversized T-shirts to bed ( why because Ben's a natural furnace/ heater)
Bens the opposite he doesn't wear a shirt to sleep because he knows he's an natural furnace/ heater.
When bumpy moved into Darius's backyard Darius and her got a closer bond and it made Ben jealous.
Darius - little spoon sometimes, big spoon always
Ben- always little spoon sometimes big spoon
Part 2?
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pucksandpower · 3 days ago
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As a long time f1 fan but most importantly an NFL fan first and foremost, the lack of genuine concern for concussions in professional sports will never fail to horrify me, and the fact I wasn’t that surprised when Franco said those things made me even more sick.
Now, historical studies is my strong suit, everything I know is form my research ability, I leave the medical knowledge to you- but a 21 year old with a still developing brain to not have a traumatic brain injury be treated with the upmost care, especially when he isn’t even a full time driver, is so insane and disgusting. How is the fia going to over police cursing but not health concerns. Absolute bullshit
I couldn’t agree more! I think the FIA, teams, and pretty much everyone in power in almost any sports league around the world are content to keep their heads buried in the sand instead of acknowledging the consequences of head trauma and actually taking measures to combat them.
I hope that with more people advocating for athletes’ safety and educating about the reality of concussions and CTE, that will change one day … but I’m also trying to keep my expectations realistic because I know how these things work.
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I'm not gonna disagree with the validity of some of these points, but I still feel the need to make some of my own.
So, "shonen", of course, is merely a demographic. It isn't a genre. When people outside of Japan use "shonen", they're often just using it as shorthand for what's an actual genre: battle manga. Shonen encompasses a great deal of genres, from sports manga, romance manga, slice of life manga, and gag manga, and even those can blend together. It still amuses me a bit that smaller slice of life gag series like Nichijou or Azumanga Daioh are both shonen and nobody seems to notice. Even a yuri manga like Bloom Into You is shonen, and was published in the same magazine as Azumanga Daioh.
It should also be noted that the vast majority of battle shonen that takes off outside Japan are the ones published by Weekly Shonen Jump, which has a particular brand and image. When people harp about alleged clichés in battle shonen (regardless of whether these clichés are actually that prevalent or if they're just going solely off Dragon Ball and Naruto), it's usually the tropes frequently utilized in these particular mangas. Which, to be honest, reflects a very narrow view? It's like simplifying American comic books to just Marvel. I'd also argue that some of them don't get enough credit for their female casts (I'd point to Gintama and Black Clover as good examples), but overall...well, splitting mangas by gendered demographics naturally leads to the aforementioned issues with female representation.
Dandadan is an example of a shonen that exists outside of the Weekly Shonen Jump bubble. It's published on Jump+, which has a looser guideline for what fits the image. It could never have been published in Weekly Shonen Jump. And I think that's a big reason why people are touting it as being this big shakeup, because it's from a different publication (still by Shueisha, sure) with more room for experimentation. There's still only a limited amount of Jump+ series that have been big hits, which is partly down to it being relatively newer. It could be a good sign for the future if Jump+ keeps having hits with this level of good writing and representation.
But seriously, don't limit yourselves with the shonen manga you read. There's still a couple with genuinely good female characters, some even protagonists! I'm gonna list a few for people to check out:
1. Undead Unluck. Great romance, great action, genuinely insane plot twists, very well-characterized female cast who all get moments to develop, and Fuuko Izumo is genuinely one of the best shonen protagonists out there. 10/10 character development. There's definitely some iffy stuff early on, but hey, same with Dandadan. And if you like romance, Undead Unluck does it VERY well.
2. Akane-banashi. So imagine a sports manga, except it's not about sports, it's about rakugo. That's this series. Incredibly engaging, Akane is a fun MC, and then you delve into deeper themes about the power of art and storytelling and you start crying.
3. Magilumiere Co. LTD. More proof that locking anime adaptations of good manga to Hulu and Prime is bullshit. A Jump+ series about magical girls as an actual business for responding to monster attacks, the main protagonist is a newbie to the world of adulting and job hunting before becoming part of a small magical girl startup. The only manga I've read where "privatizing the magic industry" is an actual plot point. And yes, there is commentary on aspects of capitalism and how valuing profit over people is bad.
And those are just the ones I'm reading. That's without going into Kindergarten Wars or Shy, both series with their own cult followings and female MC's. Or hell, Frieren got super popular, and some people don't seem to realize it's published in Weekly Shonen Sunday.
So, in short...yes, Dandadan bucks a lot of clichés associated with the most popular battle shonen, but it's still speaking from a limited point of view. There IS more variety out there, you just have to look. Don't just focus on the stuff that gets the big social media reactions from the anime adaptations, focus on the smaller cult hits too.
Ways I can think of that “DanDaDan” differs from other shonen series:
* Female MC is as important as male MC
* Canon romance gets consistent development through the series. I think that’s part of the reason why the MC ships with the rivals (Aira, Jiji) aren’t as popular with the fandom for once. The main ship is actually getting good development, so the fanbase doesn’t have to make up headcanons to fill in the space.
* Flips the found family trope on its head by having the main group despise new people whenever they show up and they even actively try to kick them out. The new people only end up staying because they keep lingering around to the point that the main group just gives up and lets them stay.
* The rivals aren’t emo or angst-ridden. Aira is a delusional tryhard popular girl while Jiji is a himbo drama queen. I’d even go as far to say that the MCs are the ones who are emo and angst-ridden.
* Supporting cast is more than just important, they become integral to the story. I’d say that the further you read into DanDaDan, the more it becomes an ensemble cast where everyone is a protagonist in their own right.
* World-building is all over the place, but in a good way. Most other shonen are pretty consistent with what kind of world their characters live in. MHA is superhero-based, Naruto is ninjas and magic, Bleach is spirits, and so on. DanDaDan feels like the author just throws whatever cool shit they can think of into the story. That’s actually the reason why I wrote in a different post that DanDaDan reminds me more of Marvel/DC than any other shonen series, it manages to capture the catch-all insanity of those comics.
* Doesn’t rely on hidden power-ups. The main characters either have to outsmart the villains or they have to train to get better with the powers they already have.
* The pervert comic relief guy is actually endearing for once. Not because of his pervert tendencies, but because he’s so oblivious to how socially inept he is that it’s kind of funny. This is gonna sound strange, but he sorta reminds me of Thor in Thor Ragnarok. Full of himself and oblivious to how dumb he can be. He’s Thor without the good looks lol.
* Flips the “nerdy outcast loser somehow gets a harem” trope. Instead of making Okarun cooler than how he actually is, the story emphasizes that the women who fall for Okarun are as weird as him. Momo is a weird outcast, Aira has main character syndrome, Vamola doesn’t understand how to human because she’s literally not one, Rin thought Okarun was a vampire (and wanted him to be).
* Flips the “elderly figure in charge of the teenagers” trope. I don’t really get motherly figure vibes from Seiko Ayase, I get more “cool wine aunt who is stuck with her niece” vibes. In fact, there was the arc where Okarun showed up to her in spirit mode to get her help with fighting off the alien invasion and Seiko’s response was, “Well, I’m not in the area and I have other shit to do, so you kids figure it out.”
* The series takes the piss out of the trope of mystical/magical items that the group acquired to get their powers. I mean…the main mystical MacGuffin in the series are Okarun’s balls.
* Okarun was about to go into an “I’m weak / I wish I was stronger / I want to get stronger for my friends” breakdown, but Turbo Granny told him to shut up and keep fighting.
* Not afraid to put the “cool girl” in as many funny situations as possible. Off the top of my head, the series built up Momo as this cool, tough girl who doesn’t take shit from anyone…then several chapters later, Okarun found out she got a job at a maid cafe.
(Feel free to add to the list!)
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babygirlmurdock · 2 days ago
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Thanksgiving with Matt
And the tradition of [Blank Holiday] dating Matt continues on!
Thanksgiving:)
- Doing a little N, M & P Thanksgiving in the office, or alternatively, going to Foggy’s family’s at the butcher because you know his father makes the best turkey & his brother makes an insane holiday cocktail (it’s mostly whiskey, with whispers of apple and cranberry, Foggy has stated) The Nelson’s welcome you with open arms as Matt’s girlfriend. Karen would make probably the best apple pie you’ve ever tasted in your life.
- You & Matt hosting for the first time. You being so nervous about the turkey being done right (considering you’ve never made one in your life and you woke up at 4am to prep it) Matt literally has to force you to get ready before your family arrives (The food was the best everyone has tasted)
- Bringing Matt to your hometown for Thanksgiving. Taking him to your favorite restaurant growing up and introducing him to the staff. Taking him to your favorite coffee shop that actually your favorite drink the *right* way.
- Matt meeting your family!! You always raved about him to your mom and your mom saying “So this is the Matthew that my kid has been gushing over!” And you getting embarrassed and Matt saying something like “gushing over me? Really?” and pinching your side teasing you. Your mom is like, “Oh, almost every phone call is like, “mom Matt did this for me today and it was so cute” and your face going so red and your heart beat quickening and Matt is laughing at your mom putting you on blast. Your dad being so impressed that his child is dating a lawyer that went to Columbia University after dating all the “no ambition” guys before Matt. Your nieces and nephews find him so cool. Your baby niece/nephew keeps trying to grab hold of Matt’s glasses when you’re holding them in your arms. Your cousins saying how good of a guy he is and how much you deserve him. Matt’s drinking beer with your uncle and dad outside as you’re helping your aunt, grandma and mom in the kitchen. (And if you’re the same religion as Matt or adjacent, Matt leads grace at the table and your granny is just swooning over this nice Catholic boy)
- Your parents being traditional and sorryyyy they make you and Matt sleep in separate beds in different rooms. But that doesn’t stop you from sneaking into Matt’s respective bedroom like a teenager to get some intimate time together (very very quietly of course, even though it’s hard given Matt’s talents) (You’re literally biting the sheets to keep yourself from making any noise and you put pillows behind the headboard to stop any banging noise. Old trick)
- Drinking too much wine at Thanksgiving dinner and going up to bed after everyone going home. Kissing Matt goodnight before he goes to bed and you accidentally say “goodnight, I love you” (FIRST TIME SAYING THE L WORD!!!!) and your heart feels like it’s going to leap from your chest and Matt being like “oh!!” and you getting all frazzled like “Oh my god this wasn’t meant to happen this way oh my god I’m- I don’t know why I said that now” and Matt pulling you into his room and shutting the door and kissing you so tenderly and saying, “I love you too. I was too scared to say it first. But, man do I love you. So much.”
Happy Thanksgiving to all that celebrate. Be safe, be full, and be thankful. 🦃🍂🥧🍽️🤎
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gothamite-rambler · 20 hours ago
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It's a start (Harley and Dick start to make amends)
Harley kicked in the door of Joker's warehouse, striding in confidently while wielding her iconic red and black bat. Dressed in a sleek anti-hero business suit, she felt empowered and ready for anything.
Harley (singing): Young and sweet, only seventeen, dancin' queen, feel the beat from the tangerine—why would a tangerine have a beat? Hm... anyways, Nightwing?!
Nightwing: Harley, turn to your left.
Harley turned, surprised when she spotted Nightwing trapped in a cage suspended above the ground. She waved enthusiastically, but he could only raise an eyebrow in response.
Nightwing (correcting casually): Also, the lyric was "tambourine," not "tangerine." It's not about a piece of fruit with a heart beat.
Harley: That makes more sense, thanks.
Nightwing (indifferent): No problem. Could you help me out here?
Harley (gasping quickly when she realized she was wasting time chit chatting): Sure! They set up this cage a good distance from the entrance; makes sense. But why is that vat over there empty?
Nightwing: They were going to fill it with Joker venom, but during the struggle, I managed to dump the original one they planned to use. So, they went off to get more.
Harley's expression shifted from curiosity to amusement as she began to giggle, which quickly morphed into her characteristic cackle. She quickly covered her mouth.
Harley (apologetic): Sorry! I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable, it's how I laugh with the Joker goop effects.
Nightwing shrugged, gripping the bars of his cage tightly.
Nightwing: I've been told my laugh is creepy. Apparently, I have a slight cackle too. They have to give me a break, I had Joker toxin in my blood a couple of times. I’m an adult! I don’t giggle anymore!
Harley shook her head with a smile as she approached the crane mechanism that held the cage in place.
Harley: You had a cute giggle when you were a kid, though. I remember when we first met. I was twenty-six at the time, and you had to be, what, eleven?
Nightwing (nodding): Yeah, eleven and three months. You were in your mid-twenties? You looked way younger back then. Honestly, I thought you were like nineteen.
Harley grinned widely, waving her hand as she maneuvered the crane to move the cage a safe distance from the empty vat, then began to slowly lower it to the ground.
Harley: I was smart, but not graduating from college early smart. Maybe it was the Joker goop on my skin and my obsession with skincare routines. I was tryin' to be like Paris Hilton for a while.
Nightwing (sweetly): Women like that get Botox, which robs us of our natural beauty. You're a bit insane-looking, but I won't argue that you're pretty too. I knew a few lady clowns in the circus that I… went to a lot as a kid and they were all gorgeous and you are too. There you go, elevated your mood for the night.
Harley (surprised by the compliment): Oh… wow, thank you! I wasn't expectin' ya to be nice to me. Are you just doin' that so I’ll actually save ya? Because I'd be helpin' ya either way.
Nightwing (shrugging): No, I’m being nice because it’s basic human decency. I don't trust you, but I've come to that point in my adulthood where I can let a couple of grudges go.
Harley shook her head with a teasing grin.
Harley: That's a healthy mindset. Batman raised ya well. My life before meetin' Joker never taught me to be kind; it was more about cursin' people out. Funny thing is, a couple of heroes have talked about how you're nicer to them than Batman. I thought they had to be exaggeratin'. You were Batman's sidekick and… you know.
Nightwing rolled his eyes.
Nightwing: While I do care about Batman, his antisocialness didn't rub off on me. I think that's what he wanted for me. He's… a good parent, to say the least.
Harley finished lowering the cage to the ground with a quick thud and then walked over, preparing her bat to break the lock.
Harley: I don't doubt that. Oh, stand back! I’m goin' to break the lock with my bat!
Nightwing stepped aside as Harley approached the cage, steadying her bat before slamming it against the lock repeatedly. With each strike, the lock buckled under her force.
Harley (while swinging): I swear I needed a Pops like that. Although college was tough, too! There was this guy, Melvin, who hated me because I kept turnin' him down for dates, and he was jealous I was smarter than him. He even started a rumor that I was sleepin' with my teachers for good grades.
After the fifth hit, the lock finally snapped, and Harley tossed it aside, stepping back to give Nightwing space. He pushed the cage door open, relieved to be free.
Nightwing (sympathetic smile): A vengeful nice guy in college wanted to ruin your reputation over that? I can believe it, sadly. I never actually believed the rumor. I read your case file with Batman once, and you earned your degree before you met the Joker.
Harley shrugged and rested her bat on her shoulder.
Harley: Blind love makes you do stupid, crazy, bad things, like tossin' aside every bit of progress you’ve made in life just to be with a guy who couldn't shut up about how, "One bad day can break a man." Ugh, blah, blah, blah! Lookin' back, he was all talk with that nihilism nonsense.
Nightwing nodded, letting out a soft sigh of agreement.
Harley: Anyways, I’m glad I could save ya, but I’ll give you some distance like you ya asked me to and head off. Ivy says hi, by the way.
Harley spun on her heel, but Nightwing stopped her, even though part of him wanted her to leave.
Nightwing (reluctantly): Well, don’t leave just yet. The Joker’s goons will be back soon, and I might… need assistance stopping them, especially from someone who used to work with them.
Harley turned back, her signature grin wide and genuine.
Nightwing (reluctantly): I might regret this later, but would you like to stay and help me?
Harley (hopeful): Does that mean ya comin' around to forgivin' me?
Nightwing placed his hands on his hips and chuckled.
Nightwing: It'll take time to fully forgive you or make amends. This is simply me being nice to someone trying to change. Just don't touch me, okay?
Harley: I won't, Ivy didn't go into specifics, but made it clear you don't want crazy women makin' any type of physical contact with ya. I get it honestly. I used to work at a dive bar for villains and goons. Not a fun time.
Nightwing (laughing softly while stretching his sore legs): I'm glad she didn't tell you everything and respects that secret.
Harley: Oh yeah, she won't admit it, but she doesn't hate ya . I'm glad she's got another person she "doesn't hate with a burning passion, but tolerates immensely." How was my impression of her?
Nightwing gave her a thumbs up trying not to joke around too much in the middle of a mission.
Nightwing: She always... said kind things about you even before you two got together.
Harley smiled proudly, warmed by his reassuring words. She felt a growing connection to Jason as she considered the idea of befriending one of the Batfam members. Yet, it was Nightwing's kindness and generosity, both towards her and others, that truly illuminated why so many people admired him.
Harley: See, this is a nice start. Jason put me on a probation period with his team, and you… you want me to stay here and help. Man, you boys are somethin' else, but I like that about ya. Ya wouldn’t hurt me like other men would, and I appreciate that.
Nightwing crossed his arms, a furrow of concern etched on his brow. Despite feeling encouraged by Harley's words, he still harbored doubts about her progress. The fear lingered in the back of his mind that one day she might slip back into the Joker's grasp. After all, he'd seen how easily the Joker had manipulated her before and with the right persuasion and even literal toxins at his disposal he had done it with others in the past.
Yet, Harley hadn’t faltered since finally cutting ties with him, and that was admirable. Nightwing couldn’t help but respect her tenacity. He recalled the darkness he had almost lost Jason to—anger, resentment, and the overwhelming weight of isolation had once threatened to swallow his friend whole. If Harley was indeed changing for the better, he didn't want to be the one who could potentially push her back toward evil.
Taking a breath, he reminded himself that everyone deserves a chance at redemption. But the stakes were high; he couldn’t shake the feeling that the moment he let his guard down, it could all unravel. Nightwing wanted to be a source of support for her, but he was also wary of the delicate balance between redemption and relapse, especially when it came to someone as unpredictable as Harley Quinn.
Nightwing (reassuringly): I would have to lose part of my brain and morals if I ever treated you like the Joker mistreated you. I'm... kind of proud of you for actually trying to be a better version of yourself.
Harley covered her mouth, stifling her emotions as she fought back tears. She nodded in understanding before walking over to Nightwing and sitting down on the ground beside him.
Harley: Want to sit with me? We can play cards. I always bring a deck!
Nightwing (slightly amused): Nah, I have to stand and keep watch. They’ll be here any minute, and I want to be ready. You can set up solitaire while we wait.
Harley: I love that game! Nightwing have ya ever been told you’re the best?
Nightwing (nonchalantly): I was born this way, but I appreciate the compliment.
As Harley set up her game, Nightwing stood watch at the door, his eyes scanning for any potential threats. He felt a bit more at ease giving her this chance. It might not be the same as the books Jason was gifted from her, but it was a start—one that he hoped would lead her further along the path of change.
Harley trying (and failing) to make amends with Nightwing
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cybershock24601 · 2 days ago
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I feel like my crow Rook would be what makes Lucanis realize exactly how fucked up his childhood was because while Lucanis’ training wasn’t pretty, it was likely not as bad as a typical crow. Anyways imagine everyone is swapping stories about their childhood and Lucanis probably shares some tale of him and Illario as boys only for Rook to casually drop some absolutely horrifying story from their training and everyone is like What. Except for Lucanis who’s nodding along because that sounds normal to him.
You know how Zevran just casually drops the most fucked up personal lore and is so casual about it? That’s Rook. They’re so indoctrinated by Crow training that they don’t really see anything wrong with what’s been done to them. I’m sure everyone starts trying to explain that what happened to Rook was really fucked up and Rook just starts getting really defensive because it’s fine. Everyone starts looking at Lucanis to check with him on all this and he probably shares some snippet from his own training because he’s also deep in denial too. By this point Davrin has his head in his hands because this is explaining so much.
Emmrich or maybe Harding probably tries to reframe it by having Rook imagine something like that happened to someone else to which Rook’s response is that’s fucked up! Only to immediately switch it up and say it’s fine because their training was Good and made them a good assassin so it’s all okay. The levels of cognitive dissonance being displayed here is insane.
It’s probably around the time everyone just starts trying to explain to Rook how crow training was actually incredibly abusive and wrong with Rook giving increasingly insane denials because Rook can do some crazy mental gymnastics that Lucnais starts to realize, maybe what Caterina did to Illario and him was bad actually. He immediately shuts that thought right down because now is not the time to confront those issues.
But anyways I think Lucanis would be experiencing some serious Recognition of the Self though the Other dealing with a crow Rook and the reactions of the rest of their friends because Lucanis is never going to bring up his trauma but Rook will be blabbing about it left and right because Rook doesn’t even realize they’re traumatized.
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