#need to try sleep aid or sum

[chaosandmarigolds]

Cabin

(the timeline is a lil weird in this so just go for the vibes, Pre-K verse. Fem!reader)

Based off this AWESOME ASK! so here's my lil take on it <3

“Think ‘m dyin.”

“You’re fine.”

”UGH- oi, th’ light- oi, Beth? That you? callin me, LT, they callin me.”

Simon doesn’t bother to look up from the tablet to his wounded comrade, who would be alright with some TLC and a long night’s sleep. Currently, he was trying to find somewhere they could all rest, somewhere safe, which seemed to be an easy task- as he knew this forest like the back of his hand. (After living in a town not even ten miles away for close to seven years) Not to mention, he happened to know where there was a cabin, which should be empty.

Technically it wasn’t his cabin, it had been your brother however when your brother moved he left it to you. And since it was the middle of the summer and the cabin didn’t have AC, Simon assumed you were most likely happily sitting at home with the kids, on an air-conditioned covered porch.

With that in mind, he made his decision to lead his team towards the cabin. It would be a bit of a trek, but it was the best option they had, it wasn’t far from where they had to leave the truck- the mission had been odd, just to accompany some international weapons dealer, and since they were the closest they had been assigned. Long- story short, it went to hell and they somehow made it back in one piece. They had to wait for pickup, to be treated, and then for the debrief, so he couldn’t quite just go home, though he wanted to.

“Since when do ya own real estate?” Kyle remarked as they approached the cabin, lit up by their flashlights and the moon that hung, he had gotten out with a broken rib and a graze on the arm- luckily he didn’t fall from any high places this time. It was a quaint thing, made of wood with a cute chimney, and a nice porch. A big red garage not too far away from it and a dirt path leading to the neat porch.

“Not mine.” Simon replied bluntly back, handing his backpack to Kyle, and then told them he would grab some emergency packs and the first aid kit from the garage. With one flashlight tucked under his arm, he went around the back of the garage while the rest went into the cabin, as he also told them the spare key was under the chair leg. He remembered building the garage, yet somehow he still would grumble about how loud the door was.

Normally the garage was barren, give or take the Christmas decorations you would have him store in there, a rack with his tools and weapons. As well a year’s worth of rations, and camping gear, both mundane and survival- to put it simply it had everything he would need if he simply needed to vanish for a while. Though he hadn’t needed to in a long moment, not since he met you and Ollie- and perhaps that could be summed up to he didn’t quite want to anymore, either way- he flipped on the flickering light expecting a vacant garage.

No. Instead, he found your car sitting in the darkness. He knew it was yours because only your car would have that dent he caused in the front fender. Within a millionth of a second everything began to make sense- you had said you had a project you were going to surprise him with, ‘take it off his shoulders’ as you gleefully had put it before he left. The air conditioning, you had taken on the task of installing the air conditioning while he was gone. Which meant you were in the cabin with Ollie and he just sent a team of men in there, armed.

All the same, he had taught you to fend for yourself, enough to where when he ran through the front door to the sight of a knife to Johnny’s neck and a panic-riddled fear within your eye. He wasn’t shocked by it. He quickly told Kyle to drop the gun, harshly at that, to which Johnny replied-

“WHA? Bonie’s go’ a knife-” “Simon?”

His eyes flash over to yours and almost out of habit, his hand went to take off the mask, to assure you, “S jus me, let Johnny go, baby. Jus me.”

“Oh my god,” You very quickly drop the weapon of opportunity and without much else warning you turn around on your heel to go down the hall, opening up the coat closet to pick up the three-year-old- who was still baffled on what was going on and why you told him to go hide.

All the while you were doing that Johnny very slowly looked back at Simon, a look of exasperation across his expression- because- well two things actually; he had technically seen the man’s face before, but never in good lighting and it wasn’t because Simon was trying to show his face it was more of a random moment post-OP. Secondly; “What do ya ‘ean ‘Baby?”

“ISTER RILEY!” The three-year-old shrieks with glee before any questions are asked and before any can be answered, the child in his blue dinosaur-themed PJs and his mob of hair messy from bed, yet he seemed as awake as one could be. Ollie tried to wiggle out of your grasp, failing so he frowned and looked to you, “Momma wan go ‘Ister Riley.”

You stand at the end of the hallway, beside the old couch and you look over the three men, one you happened to be in a relationship with, and the other two you had no earthly idea of their existence till two minutes before, where they rudely woke you up with clanking boots. You only glance the two over before returning your gaze to Simon, who is very slowly approaching his movements calculated, as if he knew a sudden movement would scare you. “Who…who are these people?”

“On my team, I didn’t know you would be ‘ere,” His voice was hushed, as if he didn’t want them to hear his words, as he got closer Ollie began to lean out of your grasp to move to him- and normally you would allow the transfer, yet not then. Which Simon was very aware of, “Needed somewhere to crash for the night, I didn’t know you ‘ere here. I wouldn’t have-”

Before he could finish his apologies, your voice was whispered through the silence, “You’re all bleeding, what? Do they not have medics? I thought- you told me you had people to take care of you.” Sure, you were very angry and more importantly scared, feeling unsafe in your own home and if not a bit betrayed, yet…for the moment you were willing to overlook that.

“Back at base, luv,” Simon was quick to reply, “Waiting for someone to ‘ick us up ‘n take us.”

You take a moment to process his words and you nod, “Johnny and Kyle?” Your husband very slowly nods, so you look back to the two beaten-up men, who were standing as if they were watching their best friend get yelled at by their parents. After a moment of breathing and slowing your heart rate you give a meek smile, “Hi, I’m sorry, that was a…well an awful introduction, I swear I’m nice.”

They were both quick to deny you being the guilty party, Kyle taking off the cap within a millisecond as he spoke, “No! We must’ve scared ya to death, completely rational reaction, Missus.”

Johnny nods and motions to Kyle as he adds on. Watching as Simon very carefully moves to stand behind you. He knew his best friend, and he somehow didn’t know of his secret wife- suspicions yes, yet he was tickled pink that he was correct. “Wha’ Gaz is sayin, you did not’in wrong, bonnie, fact o’ it is-”Ollie’s face crinkles as Johnny speaks and he moves his head to look back at Simon, seeing him from an upside-down view, “Ister Riley why does he talk weird?” As if on cue you move Ollie to sit happily in Simon’s arms and give a weak laugh to distract them both from your son’s rude question.

“Tea?”

—

“And Missus?” Kyle said after about ten minutes of silence, the night was peaceful, Ollie going from Simon to Johnny the entire night and asking about every question imaginable (”You fight bad people?””I do laddie.””Da’s so cool.”….”Wha’s your name?””Johnny.””Nuh-huh.””Nuh-huh?””Yea, ‘Ister Riley called ya someden different earlier.””Ah, Soap, tha’ my speical nickname.””SOAP??”) and you fussing about how crappy their medic was, they didn’t have one, and getting the first aid kits and clean clothes out, the night was oddly…pleasant.

Simon, who currently had a sleeping three-year-old against his chest, looks up from his tea and then clears his throat. “Wha’ bout her?”

Johnny had spent the last forty minutes thinking about it all, and he had figured out the timeline, or he thought so, so he looked to Simon- a look of pure shock and a little bit of mock upon his face, “Whatcha ‘ean ‘wha’ bout her? LT got a wife n kid ‘n we ‘ere nun wiser!”

“Tha was what I was hopin for,” Simon said dully in return, moving to stand up, an arm under the boy, and then giving you a soft smile as you came back from the garage, blankets in hand. “Gonna put Olls t’ bed.”

As your husband tells you what he was doing you give him a little nod and then set the blankets down on the couch, looking back to the very intimidating men, who were somewhat pleasant as you got to know them. “Unfortunately one of you will have to sleep on the floor. Si’s got a little cot thingy but I hate that thing so I will subject you to it. Trust me, the floor is better.”

Johnny laughs, “Nah we’ll jus cuddle on and we’ll be fine, Missus.”

“No, we will not.” Kyle deadpanned back, glaring at Johnny before looking back to you, “Thank you for opening your home.”

You smile at him, finding it easier to do so after a few hours, “Well after having to endure Ollie for hours it’s the least I could do.” It was a joke that they both caught onto, laughing lightly at it, though the air wasn’t stiff it was most definitely a bit awkward.

“Speakin of Ollie, is he-”

“Oh, he’s not Simons.” You quickly finish the thought, fully knowing that was going to be the question out of the Scotts mouth, then you clear your throat, walking to the kitchen as you spoke, “I mean- sorry, I met Simon when Ollie was about a year and a half old, my ex divorced me after Ollie was born and since he had been on deployment I didn- anyway sorry,” You wave your hand and grab your mug, “and Simon was volunteering at the school I worked at- for um, well John, you both know John of course- anyway, I needed a babysitter for Ollie and he offered and then…well the rest is history.”

“Ghost volunteering at a school?” Kyle echoed to clarify, “an the kids weren’t scared of him?”

“Terrified,” You reply, a laugh in your voice, “It was cute, he was cute, he’s good with kids, he won’t say he is but he is and oh lord, I…” A slight faltering and you shake your head, “Anyway, I’ll let you both sleep. You know where the bathroom is.”

With a few goodnights, you walk down the hall, leaning on the doorframe to the smaller room, which had a pull-down bed that had Ollie’s favorite racecar-themed blanket atop of it and a few select toys you had let him bring on the two-night trip. As you listened to the very faint conversation you stayed quiet, not wanting to ruin the moment between the father-figure and the boy.

“I like Misser Soap and Misser Kyle.”

“Mm, thos’ are my brother’s laddie, so ‘m sure they’re happy you like em.”

“If…if dey brother then- then they like Uncle Mark?”

“…Yeah, sorta like your Uncle Mark, alright, you get to sleep, yeah? Fore mum has both our hides.”

You move to stay in the hallway as Simon kisses the boy’s forehead and tells him goodnight for the billionth time, and you turn your head upward to look at him as he closes the door behind him. He looked tired if anything, so maybe you would wait for your scolding. Silence, as you had learned very quickly on within your relationship, was the cornerstone of who he was. Whatever you may want to be said he was already aware of, anything you wanted to be expressed he was already expressing in his own way. With that in mind you move to where he could easily wrap his arms around you, tucking you into what he felt was like a safe embrace.

“Didn’t mean to scare you.”

“Not scared of you, scared of what would happen without you.”

(annd yeah, that's all. Feedback, comments and all that mean so much to me <3)

[louwaist]

TIPS TO STAY ENERGIZED AT SCHOOL WHILE ☆

Okay before doing all of this I wish you all a good school start!

If you are someone who prioritize their studies and want to get the hang of everything at school in the first few weeks! I recommend taking your calorie intake a bit higher for atleast 2 weeks, then start lowering it again but not dramatically!! Just watch out on protein and fiber and you'll be good. This is just to have enough energy and not burn out and binge by the start of school. Trust me on this it's scary I know but better result will come, and will avoid binging. At the same time you won't raise concern so easily and so early.

Here are the tips!

1/ don't skip breakfast, trust me on thus one you need to focus. Make sure you have a good source of protein in your breakfast I like to have one boiled egg with oats sums up less than 300 calories and keeps me full and energized

2/have dates with you. This thing just give energy and has a good source of fiber and it's sugary but healthy sugars so help with energy!! However don't have more than 7! So that you don't lead to binge

3/ sleep during break time, yes this is weird but you need to try to put your head down, for atleast 10 minutes during recess

4/ yoga+ meditation. Wake up early drink plenty of water and make time for 10 minutes of yoga, practice your breathing. The more oxygen gets to the brain the more energized and awake you will feel, maybe do it after comming back home before eating dinner or sum. I like it

5/ during lunch break go for walk atleast 20 minute moving around can also help staying awake and energized =)

6/ caffeine. So many will say yes take coffee for energy, but too much of it can make you dizzy and faint cause your heart beat go up, anw I don't know how to explain but iverall you'll feel lightheaded. So I would recommend cocoa powder! But natural cocoa powder costs a but expensive but worth it and is so low in calorie, mix it with hot water or plant based milk for fiber and boom your really gonna stay energized for the full day

7/ don't deny taking vitamins supplements, honestly I regret not taking them, but I will get back to them make sure you prioritize vitamin C and D and also iron.

8/ last thing is get plenty of sleep, lmao normal but really this aids in weight loss have a good sleep schedule focus on it!

I will soon post excuses on skipping lunch with friends ;)

[etheries1015]

AYYE EITHERIES YOU'RE BACK

You're on the stan Lilia path I see? You are a person of culture as well. I was reading about myths and realized that the non-human immortals in Yuu's world is totally different from the faes aka the only non-human immortals in TWST because most of them either love or lust for humans. For example, I have heard that nine-tailed foxes seduce humans to drain their life force, youkais falling for humans, and in my country there are tons of stories where genies fell in love with humans. On the other hand, twst faes are like EWWW humans. Total opposites despite both having magic powers lmao.

Imagine the anti-human faes like general era Lilia, Sebek, and Baul with you, their close friend who's a powerful non-human immortal thing. You have great powers but what pisses them off IS THAT YOU ARE A HUMANSEXUAL 🤯👹😠🤬 Out of all fine faes you decided to flirt with HUMANS

Remember the distracted boyfriend meme years ago? The one where the guy is distracted and admiring the girl in red clothing while his gf is angry right next to him? That sums up your friendship dynamic with the anti-human fae.

I'M BAACKK yesss I am slowly turning into..like..A Lilia stan blog...BUAHAHA. I'm about ready to drop an ungodly amount of money for Lilia merch to fill my hyper fixation. Someone needs to shoot me and drag my corpse outside to touch some grass, or before I make some seriously problematic financial decisions.

I LIKE THAT HAHAHA Reader being a Yokai or succubus of somesort (because i'm hrny 24/7) and so infatuated with humans, being friends with Faes that have no interest in them is very interesting to you. Like. They are so cute when they wriggle around on their two legs with very little going on in their brains...it's less of love for humans, but more of...infatuation? Interest? Kind of like someone who enjoys reading mythology and going down a rabbit hole of mythical creatures they find fascinating.

Lilia- y/n. For a being incredibly talented in many aspects of martial arts and magical properties, I must say I am incredibly disappointed in your choice of whom you bring home at night.

Y/n - I have told you this time and time again, they are useful for replenishing my energy, Lilia! I don't understand what is with the fae of your world that hate humans so much. Aren't they cute? how they crawl around kind of like ants?

Lilia- That's...hmm. I do not agree with your stance, however...your analogy is kind of funny...

Baul, annoyed- I feel that this war should make it fairly obvious why we have such distaste for humans. Why don't you try another species? Beastmen, perhaps? Or even Fae? They have ample amount of magical energy you can also obtain from.

Y/n- that's like telling a meat eater to substitute chicken for chicken-flavored soy products. It just isn't the same! You two will never understand.

Baul, folding his arms- you're lucky you are aiding us in the war. Albiet at the price the shitty humans you like to mingle with despite your martial prowess.

Lilia- and that time you stopped mid battle simply to ask a human if they'd like to sleep with you.

Y/n, shrugging- don't knock it til' you try it

Lilia- ...i'll pass. Go shower, you smell like human stench.

Right to left;

Lilia, immortal/magic being Yuu, humans

HAHAHA thank you for this, it made me cackle

[absolutefilthimsosorry]

Spoilers for DnP Incohearent!!!!

I’m having so much fun trying to solve these that I made a list to keep track! Message if you can help me fill in any I’m missing or if I’ve got any wrong!!!

Also lmk if you see any I’ve missed!! I’m going to keep updating this and have it unrebloggable but you can reblog this post to have a link to it!

These are all gathered from this post and this post so check the notes on those first to try to solve them then look here if you need answers!

Sow march cheer ray = so much cherry

Wee nay urn for uke oye yer tub = we’ve never fucked on youtube?

Ta fold in fig = the golden pig

Feed hay hid eho = vday video

Tat he won ape hit morse him he = daddy want a bit more simmy

Watt ken ice hay = what can I say

North key bus teabag king = naughty busty baking

Fool tie enter nit hobo / fall tie mint her nepo moe / fault aye mint earn are ohm owe/ foul thyme inch hermit hole mold = full time internet homo

Cumin mile aid deed or = come in my ladydoor

Hum hay zinc tan = amazingdan

Elven ower fug sedge own = eleven hour fuck session

An berry moth ribeye adam stir = and every month we buy a hamster

March rest array = Manchester eye

Cyst herding yell = sister daniel

Add a ding teps = editing tips

Cop dubai khaki luna = topped by kakuna

Late eat tore = ladydoor

Half tugger etch two eggs cyst = have the courage to exist

Perish she end wink = Parisian twink

Coal ten big/ goal then pick = golden pig

Cyst ordain yell = sister daniel

Train youth inks = try new things

Gay mean moss/ gain ink mass = gamingmas

Soften need = soft and neat

A wools lied = owl slide

Topper bought them hill = top or bottom Phil

Coat fit firenze = golf with friends???

Few ours pig meow fits = viewers pick my outfits

Read less tar = red lester

Eye eight soup igloo = I ate super glue

Insight youth era too walls = inside you there are two wolves

Mine amy stan = my name is Dan

Clap hella = glabella

Hiss teeth rent = hits different

Eel eyes apron kay kiss = Eliza pancakes

See pram haze ink bra jet = super amazing project

Feels lie yawn = phils lion

Fuel ease snot dawn fair = Phil is not on fire

Jaw shush ear son = josh hutcherson

Ball bull him tour food = bauble in your foot?

Sure eck = shrek

High ate dust = hiatus

Add a dink deps = editing tips

Ga hay shoom air age = gay shoe marriage

Pope eat plate aim = poppy playtime

Eat aches stu = it takes two

Goo gal few ed = google feud

Baze ick lee eye meg ay = basically I’m gay

Ko min yout ti ew = coming out to you

Ender knit subvert grew oop = internet support group

Phylis turn yar a sheen yes = PHIL LESTER YOU’RE A GENIUS

With Audi intern yet wean ed brr wood halve mat = without the internet we never would have met

Gum ban yins drool I’ve = companions through life

Reed sons wide answer flail = reasons why dans a fail

Ewan dam ah some are reed = you and Dan are so married

Denver sis fill/ Denver cis full = Dan vs Phil

Or lawn huffing = all or nothing

Dunk rye core raft = don’t cry craft

Mortal jester roam and thick/ Morph adjust row antic = more than just romantic

So wall how debris poll light = swallow to be polite???

Oar hinge art = orange heart

Foray virgo em = forever home

Chai reel loop/ share real oob = cherry lube

Cad boyd anne = cat boy dan

Far turf ill lip = father philip

Tess lit hen ink = the slittening

Forth house indie rolled or touches = four thousand year old tortoises

Hey moth swish roundup floating = a month without uploading

Jam march let pet tea an farms = Je mange les petit enfants

Day lion howl tour = Dalien Howlter

Ima let all kit = I’m a little kit

Feel pearl lays shell ter = Phil plays shelter

Fewer blue key app ending = viewer spooky happenings

Hell low iam tour reel = hello I am Toriel

Laugh tuh gey mile kuh = left to get milk

Villas eek wreck why vuh = Phil’s secret wife

Footy strain gin said dent = ___ strange incident????

Snow core play sum = snokoplasm

Nope puts cereal sleeping mage innit = no but seriously imagine it

Tear rip pulling flu hence = terrible influence

Jeff why eye aisle hike vague liner = fyi I like vagina

Eggs intense all cry cis = existential crisis

List of contributors

@fletthewreck @dandp @deadandphilgames @manchesterau @thephouseplants @awrfhi @jonsaremembers @rachosaurusrex @dapgolf @dan-whoell @dnphobe @dreamingalto @steveandscraggy @phanbeats @danandfuckingjonlmao @pepper-pastry @yonpote @un-interactive-introvert @spaniel-trowel @sisterdanieldyke @queerdnp @morganadelacour @amid-fandoms @spectral-kitkat @goingpheral @angelzonearth @wdapteo @2009phan @dansevilpianotea

[gg-neptune]

Arguments

A/N: Sorry this kinda sucks. My aunt died a day after we found out her cancer came back so it's been rough to say the least. I hope you like it feedback is welcome and appreciated.

Warning: angst? (i think), crying, arguing

Sum: Just HC of how I think Severus Snape would be if you guys got into an argument.

Snape is a pretty possessive guy

Obsessive too and jealous

This can be the cause for a lot of arguments between you guys even if you find his tendencies endearing

He isn’t like this with anyone but he sees you too close to a guy who looks a bit too much like James one night

You don’t even have to be talking to him or know of his existence it set’s Severus off

It just makes his blood boil with rage

He genuinely can not stand it

In public he will huff and be overly quiet glaring at the table not looking at you at all no matter what you say to him

The entire night he will do this

He won’t be petty and seek attention from another woman but he will avoid you if he can

So when you get back to any sort of privacy and you're like “Hey what the heck man.”

He will just glare at you and basically spit at you, “Oh don’t act like you don’t know. Basically fucking that man with your eyes.” Or something like that

Of course your caught off guard not even knowing who is he talking about at first most likely, the other person didn’t matter to you at all 

You don’t appreciate being talked to like that especially after just being ignored either so you clap back which just leads to an argument

So now your arguing

He won’t raise his voice at you, but when he speaks you can hear how upset and mad he is

He’s cold and he’s glaring his voice is laced with a malice you’ve rarely heard never been directed at you before

Even if you aren’t sensitive and have thick skin he can reduce you to tears without thinking twice

Depending on how mad he is he might comfort you

If it’s not too bad he’ll feel bad for you and come to your aid even if your still pissed

He’d let you cuss, hit, punch, kick, scream at him whatever you might need he’d just hold you still seething but in his right mind enough to know to keep quiet

Eventually in this scenario he’s calm down that night even if you try to egg him on

Trying to make him mad and picking a fight might help him oddly enough

Proves to him you like him enough to care to fight with him over this

He won’t apologize until your both laying in bed

He’s got you in his arms and feels content enough to put his pride up and mutter sorry into your hair softly

Not even sure if your still awake 

But when you barely groan back at him in an acceptance of his apology he lightly smiles before falling to sleep as well

Now there is another scenario

Where he is just so fucking mad

He will not really notice

Maybe his brain registers them somewhere but not enough for him to stop his words

Eventually you just leave the argument is going nowhere and there's no point

It takes him a few days but he comes around

The first day he is still so livid any sighting of you immediately his blood will start to boil with anger

And soon it wears off and he starts to feel better about catching glimpses of you

He will return to your room after a few days wanting to talk

Not wanting to apologize cause he most likely thinks he is in the right still

At this point you just have to hope you're both level headed enough to not get into another fight, he can keep his nerves calm but can you?

When he starts to see your point of view he will feel so ashamed of himself

He won’t look at you as he mutters out a small apology trying to keep his voice level

Even if he is an ass the whole argument started because he was afraid of losing you to another man

You will need to say the exact words, “I accept your apology. I am not mad at you anymore.” for him to move on and look you in the eye again

If you need time he will feel scared but he can back off and give you an extra day or two but he won’t last longer than that

When you do come to terms he won’t be as close to you as he normally is as first scared you will run him off

All it takes is you grabbing hold of him and pulling him to you to reassure the poor man

He will most likely still feel bad about it for a while after but he will do his best to make it right not so much to gain your approval but to prove to himself he’s worthy of your affection

[marvellous1917]

Your mob!bucky is so sexyyyy, I neeeddd him in my life! Can I get the letter U for both alphabets pleeaasseee?

Thank you love!

Of course you can, here ya are 😘

U is unfair (does he tease a lot?) OR ugly (a bad habit he has)

——

My Icarus! bucky is the king of all teasers!

“Bucky please!” You almost yell with despair, looking down at him as he raises his head from between your thighs, chin and mouth soaked.

“Please what doll? C’mon use your words for me huh” he responds with a panty dropping (they already did) smirk.

“Pl- please let me cum Buck, I need it..” you huff, dropping your head down on your pillow.

“You don’t like what I’m doing baby? Okay maybe I should stop,” he starts to move from his position.

“No! No Buck please please don’t stop,” you whine, grabbing at his hair to get him back where you need him.

“You’re gonna be good for me baby, stop your whining and let me get back to my fun… aren’t ya?” He asks, grabbing both your wrists and pinning them to your sides to stop your wandering hands.

“Ye..yeah yes sir. Please,” you answers, lifting your hips to try and get him back where you need him.

“That’s my good girl,” he says, nosing at you, sending shivers down your spine.

(He spends the next hour eating you out and refuses to let you come until he’s finished having his fun)

——

Hehe 😈

——

Icarus!Bucky has a number of bad habits, number 1 being the fact when he gets angry, his anger turns violent quick, too quick.

“Who the fuck took out that shipment?! We had all our bases covered!” Bucky shouts, not speaking to anyone specific man in his office.

“It wasn’t any law enforcement, we would have all been arrested by now-” Tony states, the bastard lounging all over his couch.

“Yeah and it wasn’t Rumlow or we would have heard from him by now too-” Peter chimes in before being cut off by Steve,

“And it definitely wasn’t any of the other wannabes we know about, none of them have the power for that.” He says, rubbing his forehead, looking up at Bucky with a grimace.

“So, to sum up we don’t know,” finishes off Sam.

That is not good, not good at all. This shipment contained a large amount of firearms that Barnes had already promised to sell to the highest bidder. The loss of this shipment just cost him over $ 2.5 million.

“FUCK!” The shattering of the glass echos in his office, all his men falling silent at the sight. He looks down at his flesh hand, the wounds created by his action were kept open by small pieces of glass.

“…Boss-” starts Wilson, stepping closer to Bucky.

“I wouldn’t..” Steve warns Sam from his place on the arm of the couch, but lord knows the man never listens.

The second Sam lays his hand on Bucky’s shoulder, he spins and clocks Sam straight in the jaw, sending the shorter man straight to sleep.

Everyone freezes, except Clint, who gracefully catches the falling man before he hits the ground.

“GET OUT, OUT OF MY SIGHT, ALL OF YOU!” He roars, not even looking at his men as they leave, Scott grabbing Sams feet to help Clint take him out.

“Buck-”, Steve starts.

“OUT,” he yells again, starting to feel some of the pain in his hand.

Steve closes the door behind him, and Bucky collapses onto his desk chair, pulling the top drawer open and grabbing the small fist aid kit he kept in there since the dumbass named Lang shot himself.

There ya go babes hope you enjoy!

[vickyvicarious]

(In order to not derail op's thread, and jic they've not finished reading the books, hope this is ok) The madness/mental illness discussion between Laura and Jonathan made me think about the in-between of Jonathan leaving the hospital and then being validated!

One thing is, pre-Hawkins death, Mina states to Lucy that Jonathan has been working hard, but that he is weak still and placid, and also that he has nightmares. It tells on them both, because Mina cannot get a full night's sleep due to him waking up screaming and she needs to soothe him. Journal aside, Mina says she is so worried about his nerves that she doesn't communicate with him about how tired she is herself. It reminds me of Walter wanting to protect Laura from distress.

Post-Hawkins death, Jonathan gets worse. "He says the amount of responsibility which it puts upon him makes him nervous. He begins to doubt himself. I try to cheer him up, and my belief in him helps him to have a belief in himself. But it is here that the grave shock that he experienced tells upon him the most. Oh, it is too hard that a sweet, simple, noble, strong nature such as his—a nature which enabled him by our dear, good friend’s aid to rise from clerk to master in a few years—should be so injured that the very essence of its strength is gone."

Not a very traditionally ''manful'' picture, but Mina never goes there. Still, he throws himself into work. Mina says her belief in him helps Jonathan believe in himself. Maybe Laura would have benefited from being believed in.

What prompts Walter to do something drastic is when Laura weeps in her sleep. What prompts Mina to break the seal later is when Jonathan faints in public and loses the memory of it.

The way Mina treats Lucy and Jonathan in illness seems equal. She keeps their secrets upon their request too. Walter and Mina take similar active roles for their spouses, though Mina isn't necessarily masculine for it.

An interesting imho comparison could also be when Mina chooses to consult Van Helsing while Jonathan is away for his first work trip and how they communicate throughout it, and Walter with the sisters.

Aside, when she asks Van Helsing to help Jonathan, he says, "I promise you that I will gladly do all for him that I can—all to make his life strong and manly, and your life a happy one." Van Helsing promises to make his life manly, though Mina had asked to make him "well again". So he kind of made it about gender, though it wasn't for Mina.

(I also wonder if we can call Jonathan ''cured'' really, as he doesn't actually return to his former self, but it'd get too long!)

(Tagging @animate-mush because the WIW substack has ended now, hopefully you're all caught up... but regardless no spoilers past where we were last week.)

Anon, you sum up my thoughts incredibly well: "Maybe Laura would have benefited from being believed in."

I think that is perhaps the most major difference between the recovery period for the two of them. Because while they both have remarkably similar symptoms, and both their spouses hide stuff from them for a while... when things come to a head Mina chooses to believe in Jonathan. Not just in supporting him as he goes back to work (which you're right, he has little choice about doing - an external gendered element there, where societal pressures/norms mean Jonathan kind of has to get to work and Laura is never expected to at all); Mina trusts Jonathan with information, with an important role in what follows.

There's obvious contextual differences. Jonathan knew he could access his lost memories and explicitly didn't want to unless it was necessary. He put the power to decide that in Mina's hands (and it was his request but still her choice to share in his ignorance until she needed more information). When she reads his journal, she's trying to better help him within parameters they have both agreed to. When she eventually tells him everything is true, she's trusting that this will be validating for him and help him heal, help him be more "well again" (though you're right both that he never returns to his former self, and that Van Helsing is the only one who brings gender into it with his assumption that Mina's looking to make Jonathan more manly).

Laura never had an equivalent - both in terms of a discussion with the ones leaving her out for the sake of her mental health, and in the sense of some record she knows she can fall back on. She didn't have a hidden journal when she was being drugged or in the asylum. Most of the information Walter and Marian gather is from other people.

I think there is a period where both Jonathan and Laura have information hidden from them for their own sake. And I don't think that was inherently wrong or anything; in fact I think it was somewhat needed. Jonathan got the chance to explicitly ask for that period of ignorance. We don't quite have any such dialogue from Laura, but the narration still tells us that there were certain topics that were very confusing to her or which she didn't like to linger on (and her experience with Mr. Fairlie even after getting out of the asylum can't have helped), and there's that scene where she says she will "try to get better", showing recognition of how unwell she currently is. I think they both need this time to focus on recovering, and their spouses/loved ones want to support them so they can do so. Again, the societal gender role divides them here: Jonathan has to work and in fact has to take on new/more challenging work, while Laura doesn't and can devote more time to rest and recovery. There's benefits and drawbacks to both of those, in my mind. Jonathan got support from Mina and reassurance that she (and Mr. Hawkins) believed in him, which was helpful. On the other hand, it stressed him out more and he was still suffering from his nightmares, etc. Laura got more time to take it easy without having other stress added on, which was helpful. But on the other hand, she didn't get the same level of trust and belief in her ability to, if not 'return to normal,' at least to be productive and helpful in some way.

Yeah, I'm talking about her drawings. I think that is where the big divide comes. Because when she wants to contribute and help with the household, Walter decides to lie to her and play-act that she is bringing in money. I get that he's trying to avoid letting her stress over money, but it feels so condescending. He's treating her like a child rather than being honest with her - right after she asks him not to treat her like a child. Maybe being honest would just be telling her that she's not well enough to work/that it wouldn't be safe, and that he has the money handled. Maybe they'd come up with some other way she could chip in. At least she'd be involved in the discussion as she clearly wanted to be. And while I don't think she would be involved in the hunting down different accounts or confrontations that follow at the end of the book any more than Marian was, I think they should have told her what was going on. That doesn't necessarily mean giving her all the nitty gritties especially if they're triggering to her; but giving her the chance to speak for herself, to add her thoughts, even to ask to be left out if she thinks she can't handle it. She never gets that. There's no reevaluation later on.

Both Jonathan and Laura were denied validation in a way that made them doubt their sanity. Jonathan's experiences were supernatural and he fears he lost his mind. Laura was lied to and gaslit about her own identity, outright told she was suffering from delusions. Revealing that the supernatural things he remember are real was validating for Jonathan in itself, even as he still had all the accompanying trauma. Laura's (official/public) validation isn't possible until after the villains are defeated and everything is over, which in a sense stretches out that middle period. Similarly, Jonathan getting the information leads right into him getting a change to assuage his feelings of guilt and seek revenge, which could be cathartic for him. Laura probably wouldn't have the same opportunities or even desire to do so, and so maybe looping her in wouldn't have been as helpful. But it feels cruel to me never to give her the option. After a certain point, it's no longer just trying to spare her from distress, but it feels like believing she isn't capable of handling any at all.

I guess that's what feels most gendered to me. Walter, and to an extent Marian too, don't treat Laura like an adult or an equal after her experience. This does happen throughout the book, but it gets so much more egregious after she's rescued from the asylum. Marian talks about women/is kind of treated like an exception to women in general, and Walter is leaving both women out in key moments. So given how women were typically seen as less capable, to me it feels somewhat bound up in that rather than just being about her specifically (I think she handles/is capable of a lot more than she's given credit for). Mina doesn't do really that, she doesn't really bring gender into her treatment of either Jonathan or Lucy in the same way. And while others in Dracula do, it's shown to be more of a mistake.

[gumnut-logic]

Along the Way (Part 3)

Sweetapple | Dear Mr Tracy | Along the way - Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

Oh my goodness, September last year! Early September last year - was the last time I posted a part of this fic. I didn't forget it! Here is Part 3!

Thank you to @onereyofstarlight for her amazing support and for listening to my whinging and my migraine as we proofed this together. Also to @womble1 and @idontknowreallywhy for their contributions to this universe :D I had much fun rereading the whole series over the last couple of days - enough to get me writing again :D And, of course, Thunderfam at large - your support for Alexander Sweetapple as an OC has been overwhelming and I love all of you :D

Anyways, here's an answer to my evil cliffhanger from Part 2 :D I hope you enjoy it.

-o-o-o-

He woke in the dark.

Damnit, he’d fallen asleep at his desk again.

A few disconnected seconds and he realised he was not sitting at his desk - but something equally as hard was in his lap, jammed into his belly. There was grit under his fingertips.

His head hurt like that time Erica had conned him into drinking with her and Fred.

He blinked. Erica and Fred. The big Scotsman was very polite around her, and she did smile often around him.

But then Fred was always polite and Erica smiled all the time.

Somewhere water was dripping.

Alex groaned.

What the hell happened?

He reached up to touch his head and amongst the grit and dirt a sharp source of pain explained clearly why he didn’t remember.

Really, lying down and going back to sleep felt like the right thing to do.

His head drooped.

But…

What remained of his brain started putting things together and the sum of his circumstance did not add up well.

Blink.

Orientation at Tracy Industries had a mandatory safety class. It involved first aid and a huge list of things to remember in an emergency, symptoms and things to look for in situations. Alex had paid a lot of attention as part of the course was delivered by a holographic recording of Mr Scott Tracy, and the fanboy in him had lit up like a Christmas tree. Of course, that was before he actually met Mr Tracy, and Gordon…

And Virgil’s eyebrows.

Blink.

Disorientation was a symptom.

Sleepiness was a symptom.

Pounding headache was a symptom.

Darkness and dirt were likely a cause. Darkness and dirt. He clenched his fingers on the surface in front of him. Grit caught in his fingernails.

Light. He needed light.

His phone.

He fumbled for his back pocket. Found it empty.

A whimper to his right.

Blink.

The whimper became a sob and he found himself twisting in that direction.

He still needed light.

“Are you okay?” Apparently he had a voice, cracked and dry, but a voice nonetheless.

“I’m stuck.” High-pitched and frantic.

“I’m coming.” He shifted, pushing out from under what was trying to pin him. The movement set off a cascade of creaking and rumbling, dust puffed into the air and he was coughing.

Ow.

Ow.

But then everything began to shake. Tremor!

Screams around him spoke of several distressed people he couldn’t see. The shaking was intense and the structure around them groaned and creaked, dust clogged his lungs. Somewhere in the distance something snapped with a sharp crack and his world moved sideways.

Shit!

But then everything stopped almost as suddenly as it had started.

All that was left were the sounds of water, and crying, terrified people.

It was startlingly sobering.

Something crucial must have moved in the chaos because there was now the faintest of light in the dark, as if someone had turned on a desk lamp down the hall and around several corners. Not much, but enough to see shapes, barely.

Something above creaked alarmingly.

People were still crying.

“It’s okay, I’m coming.” He shifted his body, ignoring its twinges and complaints. His ankle caught on something but he pulled it out of the dark and ended up on his belly, crawling towards the closest person in distress.

“Hey.” He reached out and found what felt like a shoulder. “I’m here. It’s going to be okay.”

Was it?

“I’m stuck.” She, because she sounded like a she, moved and the whole world around them groaned and shifted.

Dirt fell in Alex’s hair.

-o-o-o-

“Hold still, big bro.” Calm and reassuring, Gordon was running his hands over Virgil’s tangled limbs, scanner in hand.

“I’m fine, Gordon. We have a job to do.” There were so many more lives to save. He tried to sit up, but found himself still entangled in his exosuit.

“You can afford to stay still for a moment, Virgil, and let Gordon check you over.” John’s voice was calm but a little threatening. Virgil knew the routine. Behave yourself or the Voice Who Answers will tattle-tale to the Commander Who Frets and will kick Virgil’s ass if he doesn’t stay still.

He let out a sigh and closed his eyes a moment.

It would be so nice to just sleep.

But then Alex smiled at him and Virgil’s heart wrenched.

There was no time. Lives needed saving.

He engaged the exosuit and its hydraulics whined.

“Virgil!”

But Virgil wasn’t listening and no brother could prevent the exosuit from moving. Gordon scurried back, scanner flickering and beeping, and Virgil rose into a scene of destruction.

The centre of Gisborne was little more than piles of rubble, a few random buildings still standing, but so many not. He could see clear to the fork in the Tūranganui River.

GDF forces were finally landing, their rescue experts deploying equipment. No doubt IR would be coordinated shortly.

“Sit rep!” Virgil’s voice was harsh and grated across his throat.

Gordon glared at him. “Bruising and a stubborn ass.” He slipped his scanner back into his kit. “Aftershock. We got targets one through fifty-two. Alan’s working on the rest.” Gordon turned back to his pod, stomping off his worry as anger.

Virgil sighed and straightened his shoulders. Bruises bitched in reminder. “Thunderbird Five, targets to my HUD.”

His space-bound brother’s voice was about as pissed as Gordon’s. “Sending now.” A grunt of frustration. “Take it easy, Thunderbird Two.”

Virgil grunted at him and went back to doing his job.

Refusing to ask the status of Scott’s situation.

He couldn’t afford it.

-o-o-o-

Scott’s situation…was getting more dire by the moment.

They were down to one lifesign and his big brother heart was aching.

All but Erica and Alex were accounted for and if he was honest with himself, he was terrified

He had worked with both the engineers…well, not extensively, that was more Virgil’s area. But he had seen the smiles on his brother’s face regarding Alex, and Erica reminded him of Gordon, except with more pink…or blue…or…hell, one of them was probably dead!

The Commander stepped in and shoved the emotion into that box he kept at the back of his mind. What happened, happened, and he would deal with it as it came.

The lifesign blinked on his HUD.

“Ready to lift!” Fireman Fred had a crane attached to the final slab of concrete.

The team of TI Māhia was formidable and Scott couldn’t help but feel proud of them. They were a great group of people.

The slab began to lift and he held his breath, body poised to move.

The team had made it abundantly clear that they didn’t like their leader diving into the rubble, but today he was International Rescue and there was no way he was risking anyone else.

“Clear!”

Acknowledgement from Thunderbird Five and Scott was moving. Nimble on winged boots, he leapt over the rubble and beneath the hanging slab.

Darkness, dirt, broken furniture, a smashed laptop…and a small figure curled up in a fetal position.

Too small to be Alex.

Too pink-haired to be Alex.

His scanner out, he waved it over a prone and injured Erica Stoltz as his heart both broke and burst with guilt at the same time.

Bruising, broken arm, she blinked up at him, dirt falling from her hair. “Mr Tracy?” Her voice was whispered terror.

No spinal threat, possible head injury, safe to move. “Hey, Erica.” His voice was soft, aimed to reassure. “Let’s get you out of here.”

He reached down and gently scooped her into his arms. Dirty pink hair rested on his shoulder. “Inter…national Rescue.”

“Yeah.” He shifted into a crouch, balanced her weight in his arms and stepping over the remains of the lab, climbed up and out of the rubble. “We’re here to help.”

A cheer met him as the crowd caught sight of Erica. Tia was smiling through the tears in her eyes.

Alex…

An image of the engineer letting go of an exhausted Virgil on the beachfront of Whitianga, eyes wide as he stared up at Scott. Virgil smiling over a shot of whisky in the evening air on their balcony, Alex’s name on his lips. Alexander dropping his computer in heroic reverence over Scott himself and later Scott’s father…again.

As he strode towards the TI team, triumphant at another member found safe, Scott’s mind was roiling over the member they had lost.

They were friends. Only friends.

Friends forever.

Fuck.

The medical team swooped in and Scott gently deposited Erica on a hoverstretcher.

He smiled down at her. “You’re safe now.”

She stared up at him wide-eyed. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” He turned away to face both Fred and Tia and what now must be done.

His HUD had no more lifesigns to give any hope. “Thunderbird Five, confirm rescue complete.”

There was silence for a moment, an unusual hesitation in the air. “Confirmed, Thunderbird One. All lifesigns accounted for.”

Perhaps he still had hope because those words dashed whatever was left.

Tia looked up at him and Fred looked down. Both faces spoke reality.

Scott cleared his throat. “We need to find Mr Sweetapple. Where was he last seen?”

Tia blinked and it was her turn to clear her throat, but she straightened, as professional as he. “Mr Sweetapple had just returned from visiting his mother in Napier. He was still technically on leave, but I suspect he returned to his lab anyway.” She drew in a breath. “He loved his work.”

Past tense.

Past tense always hurt.

He straightened again, his hand reaching out to touch Tia’s arm. “We will find him.”

She stared up at him, tears welling in her eyes again. “I know.” Her lips pursed. “Thank you.”

He turned back to the rubble that had taken so much. Beside him, the medical team finished their examination of Erica and activated the hoverstretcher, ready to take her to the ambulance waiting…

Scott blinked.

Spinning on a heel, he pushed his way towards the engineer. “Erica, do you know where Alex was before the quake hit? We need to find him.”

Wide blue eyes look up at him…and frowned. “Alex?” She looked out over the remains of the labs. “So glad I kicked him out. He could have-“ She hitched in a breath.

Scott froze. “What?”

“He is going to be so pissed. All his work…” She blinked as if suddenly realising exactly she who she was talking to. She moved to sit up. Both Scott and the medical team hurrying to stop her.

“Erica.” Scott crouched down, his heart missing beat after beat. “Where is Alexander Sweetapple?”

“In Gisborne. With his mother.”

-o-o-o-

Next

[onionhaseyeoo]

NEW Seiun Lore analysis!

“Parallax-polysemy” is a whole reference to her ability, I’ll break down both words.

•Parallax is a term primarily used in astronomy and photography, referring to the apparent shift in position of an object when viewed from different perspectives. In a broader sense, it can refer to the idea that something may appear different depending on the viewer's position or perspective. Which is a reference to Seiun’s ability to change her appearances, or even reality to an extent.

•Polysemy is a linguistic term that refers to a word or phrase having multiple meanings. Like how Seiun has multiple “selves” and is never sticking to just one persona.

When combined, "parallax polysemy" suggests the idea that the meaning of a word or concept can change or shift depending on the perspective from which it is viewed, like how Seiun changes depending on the task at hand or how she’s feeling. Essentially, it implies that the multiple meanings (polysemy) of a word or concept might vary or appear differently depending on the context or viewpoint (parallax) of the observer.

“Polysemic Monodrama” refers to again, the word polysemy, and then a “monodrama” refers to a dramatic work, typically a play, where only one character is present or one actor performs all the roles. It's often an intense, focused exploration of a single person's thoughts, emotions, or experiences. Like Seiun’s view on the world being “one big stage play” and how she refers to herself as an actor.

NAME: 

Seiun’s name (星雲), is a whole astrological reference, tying to the origin of the word parallax. 

•In Japanese, "nebula" is written as 星雲 (せいうん, seiun). This term combines 星 (hoshi), meaning "star," with 雲 (kumo), meaning "cloud," reflecting the concept of a star cloud or nebula.

CHARACTER INSPIRATION:

Seiun’s concept itself was heavily inspired by Sparkle of Honkai: Star Rail, and Heath Ledger’s Joker. A case of method acting gone wrong. Here is a brief summary.

TW: Mental illness, idk what else but I feel like it should have a TW..?

The Great Actor: Heath Ledger

(Seiun Performance No. 1)

those being hidden under the veil

Heath Ledger was an Australian actor. After playing roles in several television and film productions during the 1990s, he moved to the United States in 1998 to further develop his film career.

Heath Ledger made history with his performance as the Joker in The Dark Knight. The Dark Knight won Ledger a posthumous Academy Award and a Golden Globe for Best Supporting Actor.

Ledger's portrayal of the Joker in The Dark Knight was initially deemed "inappropriate," but he delivered an unexpected and incredible performance that silenced the skeptics.

Mirroring Character: The Joker

(Seiun: Performance No. 99)

those being reflected on the mirror

During the filming of Batman: The Dark Knight, Heath Ledger kept a scrapbook which he called “The Joker Diary”. It was a scrapbook where he kept everything that was related to or could be helpful for his role.

He sometimes wrotes horrifying stuff in the diary as the Joker himself, like how blind babies and AIDS make him laugh. He also placed pictures of villains from other movies in this Joker Diary.

Ledger isolated himself for weeks before the movie, in the hotel room, people used to hear him laugh all by himself and make creepy voices. He was trying to choose the perfect voice and laugh for The Joker.

The actor even tempted one of his famous co-stars to hit him while filming the scene. Bale said to Ledger: 'You know what, I really don't need to actually hit you. It's going to look just as good if I don't.' 

Then Ledger replied, 'Go on. Go on. Go on ...' as he was slamming himself around and there were tiled walls inside the set which were cracked and dented from him hurling himself into them.

Heath Ledger explaining his sleep troubles when portraying the character and summed it up on New York Times Interview back in 2007 while the film in production, he said: 

"It's physically and mentally draining role: psychopathic, mass-murdering, and schizophrenic clown with zero empathy."

Losing Himself: Self Doubt

(Seiun: Performance No. 990)

those being stared by her own mask

After Batman was filmed, Heath Ledger could no longer separate the character and himself, he suffered from serious depression. Some said he got too absorbed and didn’t know how to come back.

He wanted fame and then when he got it, he didn't want it. The whirlwind shock that came with a new level of renown struck the actor hard. Like many artists, Ledger grappled with self-doubt. 

He often felt there was a chance his performances could be better or that he simply hadn't hit the mark. He comments about his consistent nervous energy:

"It's pattern for me, going into any job carrying certain level of anxieties and doubt, self-doubt, fears toward my inabilities and not being able to. I fooled them, or I can't do this. I'm not an actor. I shouldn't be here. I think everyone goes through that. I certainly do."

I won’t say anything else cause this is already pretty long, but I’m sure you can see the parallels with him and Seiun.

@the-mafias-muzzled-dog here!

[winterswhumpblr]

When we were young

Hua Biao played by Neo Hou

One of the best drama’s I watched in 2022. The found family in this show is insane. Every single one of the main characters go through a lot, but I’ve only focused on Hua Biao.

Watch on Viki

01: classmates find out he was kicked from his old school, told he doesn’t belong at the school, arm bitten, in pain,

02: in a fight, wins, manipulated into fighting again, concern for him, hands treated at hospital {flashback: in a fight, bleeding hands} sad upbringing revealed,

03: pushed, almost falls into a nail in the wall, saved, fakes stomach ache, volunteers to take the punishment of his classmates, forced to run 100 laps, tired, sweaty, getting yelled at by principal, helps whole class cheat, gets caught, reprimanded,

04: pranked, panicked, explosion in his home, part of the roof is missing, cleaning up, asking his friend not to tell other people about it, sad, letting his grandma blame him,

05: sleeping, friend finds out secret, mentions of the wounds he’s collected from fixing the roof, falls through roof, sad, unable to buy hearing aids

06: concern for someone,

07: receives the punishment for something his friends did, covered in bruises, doesn’t want to remove his shirt during a basketball game, forcibly gets it removed, anxious, concern for him, teacher pokes bruise, makes up a fake illness as to why he has bruises in the first place, tells his friend the truth,

08: stumbling, exhausted, rushing, sweaty, gets to class late, forced to hold basin of water over head as punishment, rained on, faints, concern for him, dizzy, blurry vision, ears ringing, mentions of him having a slight fever, whining, scared of getting injection, tricked into to taking it <comedic>, concern for him, disoriented, saying the fever fogged his brain,

09: feeling lightheaded, hiding it, paler than usual, light headed, faints, concern for him, malnourished from barely eating and making one meal last multiple, concern for him, being fussed over, friends make him meals and put them in containers so he can eat at home, concern for someone, searching for his granny,

10: {continuation of last episode: search for granny, finds her, concern for someone}worried and anxious, headmaster finds out the truth about tutoring, upset, says he did it because he needs money, asks to be removed as class monitor,

11: love interests family feed him meals, tricked into eating more, separated from friends, concern for someone

12: showing off latest award to parents’ pictures, friends come over to help honour the parents on their anniversary, concern for someone, running, fighting someone, cuts hand, runs after criminal, helps police catch them,

13: jealous, threatened, distracted, sad, can’t find his grandma, worried, running around looking for her, found her, yelling, upset, protecting her, makes a deal, needs money, has three days to get a large sum of money, upset, sad

14: friends help him come up with the money, gives it to contractor, plan goes awry, protecting his friends, glass hits his forehead, teacher found them, yelled at, running away, hiding from security, sleeping in the classroom overnight,

15: nothing

16: worried about someone, sad, keeps hiding a gift he got the love interest, missed his timing multiple times, sad, pretending to sleep, dismissing love interest, wanting to be left alone,

17: helping a friend out, staying with them, getting food for them, trying to coerce them to eat, making sure they’re okay, staying with them, upset, lost his necklace, looking for it, relieved, mentions of what happened to his parents and the importance of his necklace, sleeping,

18: concern for someone, sad, finds out his granny has Alzheimer’s, crying, pretending he’s fine, sad

19: concern for someone, carrying granny on his back, running to the hospital, sad

20: Talks about what his life has been like, applies ointment to granny’s burn, concern for someone, running away, hiding,

21: granny forgets he told her where he was going, police called, scolded, concern for him, sad, concern for someone, concern for him, plan goes wrong, running away,

22: Itchy, tired, concern for someone, hiding his job, being followed, tired, out of breath, covered in dirt from his job, worried, frustrated, upset, confession to love interest, concern for him, exhausted, granny mistakes him for his father, pretends to be his father for her, sad, calming his granny down, friends find out about his job, help him clean, feet being treated, groaning, love interest finds out about his granny’s Alzheimer’s

23: friends help him do his job, let him keep the money, grateful, wants to buy a massage machine to stimulate his gran’s memory, sad, granny forgets him in front of love interest, mistakes him for his dad, emotional, concern for someone, rushing to the hospital, worried

24: looking visibly down, granny doesn’t recognize him, thunder storm, power goes off, calming grandma down, concerned, frantic, rushing to check on grandma, running in the rain to buy a flashlight, grandma doesn’t recognize him, wooden stick held against him, worried, sad, emotional, crying, being slapped repeatedly by grandma, crying, being told to leave his home, upset, walking alone in the rain, sitting alone getting drenched, upset, crying, yelling, being comforted by love interest, sobbing for his grandma, friends are there for him, friends help him with his grandma, hears grandma crying, comforting her, crying silently, says goodbye to his friends/love interest, chooses to not go to college and instead stay with his grandma and travel until she completely loses her memories, sobbing

[borathae]

DONE WITH ANOTHER EXAM u know what that means???

Chapter 34

fuck where is yoongi 😭😭😭kook come to ur senses please

OMG YOONGI wait did he just come because of kook, bruh we could have made out like a week ago 😔✊🏻

omg im so scared and nervous i wanna cry even tho its kook being scolded

NO DONT KILL HIM WTF YOONGI NO

“Thanks, but I can manage myself. I did so splendidly in the last two weeks” fr

He made you believe that he abandoned you. And now he is back. the entire para just summed up what we all felt Your anger feels so misplaced. Yoongi had a lot going on. After a millennia he felt again. He must have been so overwhelmed. Who knows what guilt and pain he went through those past two weeks. that is also true and idk what to feel aaaah feeling the pain of both people. DAMN U JUST PORTRAYED THAT SO WELL AND SUBTLE I DIDNT EVEN REALIZE IT

Where are those goddamn band aids FUCKING REAL U CAN NEVER FIND IT WHEN U NEED IT and u will find it in the same room, same drawer a week later 🥲

You made him turn his emotions on. It was your fault that he left in the first place. Be angry at yourself, that’s what you should do. its not exactly your fault, just a situation that had to happen

“Stupid bathroom!” you yell, throwing another cabinet closed. #justiceforcabinet2024

wow why is he so chill all of a sudden *trust issues be working on overtime

Is that what Jungkook could have too? 😭😭 yoongi pls dont leave again, i wanna be extra proud of kook

oh kook is sleeping for now (wtf i felt like a mama bird for a second there)

“Yes?” he exclaims, turning around almost excitedly. sir whats going on?? is it the emotions??? omg he is a pookie pls i love him bing bang boong forgiven already, who left for 2 weeks? nobody, idk such a thing

Now that he is so close again, you have forgotten everything you had wanted to tell him. oh it wasnt just me lol

“Doesn’t matter, I’m back now”, OK THATS IT FOLKS HE IS GOING TO LEAVE AGAIN 😭😭😭

oh a new plant 😭

Is he just staring? Oh dear. He is. PLEASE OUR SHY KITTY 😭😭

Oh how excited he sounds without even noticing that he does. 😭😭 do you want all of us to just cry every damn line? cuz u had done it

Yoongi is by your side, pretending to do the same while in reality he was looking at your face the whole time. HA SIMP ALERT (pls simp more we are simping for it)

“It’s not bad”, he agrees. You scoff, “such enthusiasm” Yoongi stumbles after you down the path, grumbling quietly. he is such a tsundere kitty i cant OFC HE LOVES HAND HOLDING NEVER LET GO

They are so bloody tiring” mood but numbness is too scary soo..

“They’re flowers, I don’t see any difference”, he grumbles, I LOVE HIM AND THE WAY YOU WRITE HIM I LOVE THEIR BICKER OVER SORRY HIS GRANDPA RUN AAAAH *watches a compilation

YOONGI BOONGI YAY HE ACCEPTED IT HAHA CUTIE PIE

“Forget it. I didn’t want to do it anyway”, i was cackling until i remembered this is how i act with mom, oh mom im sorry

YAY THEY ARE GOING GROCERY SHOPPING ALL DOMESTIC shit taehyung my baby 😭😭 THE JACKET RAAAAH

damn 1963, my mom wasnt born yet

no yoongi we dont growl here pls *blinks 😃😄😃 🫠 “he’s having a phase, please ignore him.” A PHASE STOP 😭

he is trying his hardest to stifle a laugh. THE JOKE PLS I LOVE HER HAHA guess he is going to have a hard time doing that

WE KISSED IN THE SNOW YIPEE YIPPEEE YIPPEEE YEEHAW HEE HOOO ✨🧚🏻🎆🎇💖😍🤩😻

ACCEPT THE COMPLIMENT YOONGLES YOURE A PRETTY MF GOT IT???

HOLY SHIT IT WAS A SPY DAMN WE JUST SAW A MURDER i literally just shivered

oh this time he answers her questions properly thats a difference hm

WTF OOF DAMN I - (did ever tell u that i love your writing and this bombastic story?)

It is not every day that you watch someone get beheaded or find out that someone wanted to fuck your dead body fr im still shivering and goosebumps are still there.

i love when they do vampire zoom haha

I’ve just lived long enough to have learned the skill.” Tae: 😃 ALSO IM SORRY YOONGI I LOVE THAT YOU CAME BACK but when is tae getting out?? 👉🏻👈🏻 great TAE MY BABY IM SORRY 😭😭 I CANT DO ANYTHING

“Are you manipulating me? she may or may not do that, but can she actually do that to you? yeah she cant so stop saying this

GREAT HE LEFT AGAIN WHERE ARE U NOW

i love when they talk, like everything just gets deeper, both her and him, the plot

OMG YOONGI wait did he just come because of kook, bruh we could have made out like a week ago 😔✊🏻

fjasdjf no he was genuinely in the midst of coming back when he suddenly heard the noises and then just came running 😭

He made you believe that he abandoned you. And now he is back. the entire para just summed up what we all felt Your anger feels so misplaced. Yoongi had a lot going on. After a millennia he felt again. He must have been so overwhelmed. Who knows what guilt and pain he went through those past two weeks. that is also true and idk what to feel aaaah feeling the pain of both people. DAMN U JUST PORTRAYED THAT SO WELL AND SUBTLE I DIDNT EVEN REALIZE IT

NO BUT I AM SO :( FOR BOTH OF THEM :((

You made him turn his emotions on. It was your fault that he left in the first place. Be angry at yourself, that’s what you should do. its not exactly your fault, just a situation that had to happen

the way you can see the learned guilt in her and in everything she does :(

wow why is he so chill all of a sudden *trust issues be working on overtime

I feel like he is just really nervous and trying not to scare her away with too much movement :(((

“Yes?” he exclaims, turning around almost excitedly. sir whats going on?? is it the emotions??? omg he is a pookie pls i love him bing bang boong forgiven already, who left for 2 weeks? nobody, idk such a thing

of course it's the emotions heheh <3 he is in loveeee <3

oh a new plant 😭

HE IS IN LOVEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Is he just staring? Oh dear. He is. PLEASE OUR SHY KITTY 😭😭

I LOVE HIGMMGMGM

Oh how excited he sounds without even noticing that he does. 😭😭 do you want all of us to just cry every damn line? cuz u had done it

jfasdjf me fr fjadsjfa

Yoongi is by your side, pretending to do the same while in reality he was looking at your face the whole time. HA SIMP ALERT (pls simp more we are simping for it)

HE IS SO SWEET AND CUTE AND IN LOVEEEEEE

“It’s not bad”, he agrees. You scoff, “such enthusiasm” Yoongi stumbles after you down the path, grumbling quietly. he is such a tsundere kitty i cant OFC HE LOVES HAND HOLDING NEVER LET GO

no but I love him so much!!!!!!

They are so bloody tiring” mood but numbness is too scary soo..

100% :( gosh my boongie :(

“They’re flowers, I don’t see any difference”, he grumbles, I LOVE HIM AND THE WAY YOU WRITE HIM I LOVE THEIR BICKER OVER SORRY HIS GRANDPA RUN AAAAH *watches a compilation

same same same !!! I love him so much !!!!

damn 1963, my mom wasnt born yet

lmaoa mine was like 2 and my dad 3 kfadkf

no yoongi we dont growl here pls *blinks 😃😄😃 🫠 “he’s having a phase, please ignore him.” A PHASE STOP 😭

THIS IS SO FUNNY TO ME BAHAHHAHAH

he is trying his hardest to stifle a laugh. THE JOKE PLS I LOVE HER HAHA guess he is going to have a hard time doing that

I LOVE HIM HE IS SO IN LOVEE

WE KISSED IN THE SNOW YIPEE YIPPEEE YIPPEEE YEEHAW HEE HOOO ✨🧚🏻🎆🎇💖😍🤩😻

I genuinely love this chapter so much 😭😭

HOLY SHIT IT WAS A SPY DAMN WE JUST SAW A MURDER i literally just shivered

HE IS SO COOL FOR MURDER THOUGH :)

i love when they do vampire zoom haha

lmaooa me

“Are you manipulating me? she may or may not do that, but can she actually do that to you? yeah she cant so stop saying this

I feel like she can JFAJDFJ he is way too smitten for her JFJADSFJ

i love when they talk, like everything just gets deeper, both her and him, the plot

SAME SAME SAME !!!! I LOVE THEMEEEEEE !!

[justfor2am]

it is midnight i have been on n off asleep since like 7 .anyways perspective flip, bts, for want of a nail, + a thousand words of the unusual fic asks? for whatever fics u want as usual 🫡

doing these ones out of order because brain said so, anyways— BTS: I’ll write a DVD commentary about my personal favorite passage from: [7th Sense] (Chapter 9: he's picking a lock he doesn't go into)

The final scene of that chapter, with grian and mumbo, is probably my favorite part of this fic so far, mostly because i'm getting to explore a different side of depression than I often see written in fics.

usually, you get the sadness, the shaking, the no talking/no eating, the limp, wilted flower who needs to be saved. and yes, depression is that sometimes, but it can be, and often is, so much messier than that.

it's anger. it's misplaced frustrations because the truth is too scary to confront, it's knowing you need to shower/brush your teeth/get dressed and being unable to do it anyways. it's not doing those things on purpose because you think you don't deserve them. it's quiet lethargy, it's restless nights that turn into a room ripped apart because you just can't fucking sleep so you're making it someone else's problem.

it's the lashing out at someone who means the world to you, because maybe this time they're take the hint and leave forever. it's knowing deep down that you're too scared to ask for help, and that you didn't mean to help them.

grian isn't magically better by the end of the chapter. his room's still a mess, he still hasn't eaten or gotten cleaned up, and he half asses his way through an apology to mumbo.

but he asks mumbo to open the window. and they both know the deeper meaning in that gesture, knowing that it was that very window that scar escaped into the night. that it's been firmly shut since then. it's progress, like it or not. _________ For Want of a Nail: If Scar had died giving Grian his life force in: [though i've closed my eyes, i know who you pretend i am] the ending, i'm sure you can imagine, is much more depressing. Eleri, the elven queen, would be without an heir to her bloodline, and the grief of losing her only son, the last blood family she had, would cause her magic to lash out, and cast the kingdom into a century of darkness. somewhere in that time, the heartbreak would kill her.

in the mad scramble to find someone to take over, gem would accept the offered kingdom, but feel immense regret over the situation, partially blaming herself for scar's death. if she had kept quiet and agreed to marry him in the first place, would he still be alive?

mumbo, now without a ward, would pledge himself to grian's aid, who very much does not want mumbo's help. grian is the most guilt-stricken of them all, half of scar's life force now pounding in his chest, keeping grian alive. that coupled with newfound avian instincts, and no mate to help ease him through the new magic in his blood, grian would be an complete mess, unwillingly relying on mumbo to keep his instincts at bay. it would be a few decades until, eventually, grian would isolate himself in the nearby mountain range, somewhere far too cold for a vampire like mumbo to follow.

grian would live out the rest of his days more animal than man, a self-inflicted penance for costing his lover his life.

good thing that didn't happen, right? _________ A Thousand Words: I’ll create a photoset/gifset that, IMO, sums up the main themes/concepts I intended for [the blood i'm owed is all yours] (trying to motivate myself to update the damn thing lmao)

compromise, i'm doing a playlist instead because this post is long enough as is. no particular listening order, put this bitch on shuffle king

_________ Perspective Flip: I’ll write a scene from [Why Do I (Even Try?)] from another character’s point-of-view (Chapter 18: just count to ten, and try to breathe)

(italics are original text, i wrote this stream-of-conscious style literally this moment so sorry if it's not super cohesive)

Grian hid behind his wine glass, the ruby drink only brightening his blush. "Rule two, no letting the public find out. I've got a lick of sense about me, and I know that we would be immediately framed as me being the pity points, some kinda mangy boyfriend, and I'd like to pass on that part of the publicity train, thank you very much."

"I think you would make an incredibly handsome boyfriend, but continue."

It was too easy to rile Grian up, Scar genuinely wondered if it was worth taunting him this early into their evening. It was cute, watching him try to gloss over Scar's attacks, deflecting with his own pointed silence. The game was fun, but half the joy was in the end result.

"Most importantly, rule number three." Grian set down his glass, purely for dramatic effect. "No falling in love with one another."

This one caught Scar off guard. He hoped Grian couldn't tell in his face, quickly clearing his throat to fix his soured expression. Right. Of course. This was transactional at best: Scar would receive Grian's company in the form of sex, meaningless hook ups between co-workers. At least, that's how Grian was presenting the idea.

Scar didn't want that. He wasn't after only the physical, as much of a nice bonus as it could be. He wanted to know Grian, really know him, reach the parts that the man kept hidden from the world and fall into his mind; Scar wanted all of Grian, not just the surface level.

Even so, he knew that for Grian, sex was so much more than surface level. It was a serious gesture of trust, and not one Scar was willing to betray. But that didn't mean Scar would give up his love so easy, and let himself be heartbroken in favor of physical intimacy.

Some way, some how, Scar would make a space for himself in Grian's heart. He owed it to himself to try, at the very least.

Scar grinned, and lifted his wine glass in toast. "Challenge accepted."

[ally-holmes]

"May I?"

Day 4 of the 30-Day short story challenge

The prompt given by a friend was "May I?" and so I decided to make a very small and simple Good Omens fanfic. It's my first for this fandom. There isn't much.

Fandom: Good Omens | Pairing: Aziraphale x Crowley

Warnings: pre-slash, spoilers? | Words: 1026

Also available on AO3

Here it goes:

If one were to ask Anthony J. Crowley when did it begin… Well, for starters one would have to be struck by incredible luck to find Mister Crowley in any mood for engaging in a self-revealing conversation. Then, of course, one should specify what one meant by IT as Mister Crowley could venture that one meant The Bening, or even Before that, seeing as he was a demon and all that fanfare.

Once that IT had been specified, though, Mister Crowley would scrunch his nose in concentration, his yellow eyes unfocusing under his dark shades. 1862 may be the answer. The year Aziraphale became incredibly outraged when he asked the angel for holly water.

Things had been turning in Hell, and not for the better if one ought to speculate what "better" meant for Hell. Rumors vibrated under Hell's floors, restlessness infected high and low demons alike, and meanwhile, there he was, on Earth, fraternising with the enemy.

Angels and demons were on opposite sides planning the magnificent war that would take place on Doom's day. However, on Earth, Aziraphale and Crowley had an agreement in order to fulfill their supervisors will and yet enjoy all the perks of human nature. That was clearly dangerous and although it had always been the case, Crowley found himself in desperate need of a plan B. Succumbing to Hell's sentence if they found out about his conversations with the angel was a dreadful idea. He'd rather cease existing by his own means, thank you very much.

The angel hated the idea, of course, and so a long period of them not talking to one another began.

It started then, perhaps. A lurking feeling of loneliness and pointless existence nested in his chest, making themselves terribly comfortable there. Crowley reproduced the exchange in his mind over and over trying to pin down the exact word he should've changed or added in order to make the anger understand that it was imperative that he became the owner of a bottle of holy water.

Crowley tried to force his path and Aziraphale's in order to break the ice that kept growing between them, but it was fruitless. All he could do was observe Aziraphale's SoHo bookshop from a safe distance, his heart aching painfully and pitifully.

After that, Crowley took a nap. One shall be well versed in the notion that even when neither angels nor demons have the need to drink, eat, or sleep, they can do so if they so much as please, although a nap from them could entail a few decades.

It wasn't until 1941 that they met again in a London church at night. Crowley had heard about the nazis tricking a Mister Fell into finding them extremely rare books. They put a double act on Aziraphale, as they used a sweet miss to pretend to be a secret agent working with Scotland Yard. Only the angel could be as naïve as to trust and fall for it, Crowley was sure of it.

All in all, Crowley entered that church to aid whom he still thought of as his colleague. Friend, perhaps. It wasn't easy. Consecrated ground did awful things to the soles of his feet. If only his jittery tippy-tap wouldn't make his arms shake on his sides he could've entered much earlier and snatched a big bowl of the holy water resting there. Unsupervised!

Again, summing it up, Crowley and Aziraphale saved each other that night. It might've been then when it started, probably. Standing on top of the church ruins after the German bombing over London, Crowley cleaned his dark lenses as Aziraphale cried in distress about the rare books the nazis had asked him to bring and that he thought were lost under the ruins. Calmly, Crowley seized the bag full of books from one of the dead nazis and handed it to the angel.

"Lift home?" he asked playing it cool.

If one were to ask him how he knew it had taken place, Crowley would answer that the angel's eyes were unable to contain a certain affection from all the drive to SoHo.

Their night did not end there. No, Crowley had an appointment with one of the nightclubs, and Aziraphale went with him. The angel was beaming at the perspective of performing his magic tricks on a stage, and so Crowley humored him as nicely as he could.

During the magic performance, it appeared again in the form of pure trust. Crowley had never been trusted so blindly, so bloody well undeserving, and yet there was the angel handing him the gun to perform a magic trick where none of their miracles worked. The trick was a success and the beaming came back to Aziraphale as he played with the feathery boas in the dressing room, a flamboyant energy pouring from his smile and movements.

Crowley was captivated.

It nearly meant his end, as their understanding was found out by another demon, but he couldn't care anymore. Not when Aziraphale was just there, so damned happy and innocent.

Crowley was quick. His brain, that is. He was fast to acknowledge the thing-y in his being that pulled him towards the angel with such fervor it made him dizzy. Crowley was deeply and utterly in love with Aziraphale.

More so when Aziraphale showed that, using some handy work, he had snatched from the demon the photograph that proved that they knew each other rather well. They dined together, toasting their success, closing the gap those years had craved in their relationship.

Then, long after the food had been digested and the wine had been drunk, Aziraphale escorted him to the bookshop door.

"May I?" he asked, with his posh manners and his feelings falling down his sleeve.

Crowley obliged.

Aziraphale assisted him with his coat, and his hat, and he even straightened his red tie though it did not need any adjustment.

That is when it started. The moment Crowley knew Aziraphale loved him with the same ardor as he loved him. Sadly, Aziraphale has always been the slower of the two as well as the most afraid of Heaven's ire. 

The end.

[theuniverseawakens347]

it’s absolutely mind blowing …ur telling people that off of MY COOCHIE PIX TO MY BOYFRIEND JUSTIN IFWE THE ONLY PERSON I SENT IT TO…and DID NOT TELL TO SHARE W THE WORLD…that I got all these girls into exploiting themselves …🤔 SOUNDS LIKE A FAILED PARENTS BLAME SHIFTING BC WTF THE FUCK LEE.

Nora smith IVE NOT HEARD OF UNTIL THIS FUCKING YR..SO HOW SWAY?? I GOT FRIENDS IN THE INDUSTRY BUT NEVER HUNG OUT W THEM… MY PAGES ON INSTAGRAM AT INDIA LOVE WHO STALKED ME BEHIND CLOSED DOORS N COI ALL SAY THEY WANA BE LIKE ME…BUT I AINT TALK TO THEM BITCHES. CRAZY I AINT KNOW BITCHES SORRY GIRLS SEEN. Y COOCHIE AS WAS LIKE “ omg THATS THE thing to do..” I WAS LOOKING AT INDIA LOVE AT 16 ..ROLE MODELING AFTER HER AND. RYSTAL WHILE FUCKING DATING PRESTON TAKING ME AROUND HIS GROWN ASS MEN FRIENDS AND FUCKING ME ON SHOW…

Dude really. GROW UP AND FUCKING ADMIT UR A LYING SAC OF DELUSIONAL SHIT. KEVIN SPACEY IS ADMITTING GUILT OF SEEING LIKING AND PASSING IT FOR ADVANCES AND TRYING TO GET AT ME TO SLEEP W ME. AT DAVE SMURTHWAISTE…PLANNED W PRESTON AND GETTING ME TO DOUG AND SANDRA BERGERON WHEN I BECAME “LEGAL” AT 18 …CAUSE NO ONE WAS TAKING ME AT 16 w Preston… ALSO I BROKE UP W HIM AFTER OUR ALASKA CRUZE SHERE BILL ALREADY SENT TO THE KIDS ON THE CRUSE TO SOCILITIC SLEEPING WITH ME … IE AGAIN REVENGE PORN BY JUSTIN FOR BREAKING UP W HIM AT HOWARD OVER HEARING ME ON THE PHONE W HIM IN THE BLUE ROOM TELLING HIM TO LEAVE ME ALONE WERE DONE AND HOWARD TAKING THENPHONE SAYING..LEAVE MY DAUGHTER ALONE AND THE. BOOM RANDOMLY FUCKING SHOWS UP AT MY HOUSE 2/3 DAYS AND AGAIN W TASHA I BREAK UP WITH HIM AND LET HIM KNOW HIS DAD NEEDS TO COME PICK HIM UP CAUSE WTF MY NIGGA DIDNT NO BODY INVITE YOU … 🤯 DAVINA HE WAS CHEATING ON ME WITH SENT IT BC I SAID I WAS GOING TO BEAT HER ASS ..WHICH I NEVER DID SAY I SAID I WAS GOING TO FUCK JUSTIN UP FOR CHEATING THE “LAST TWO WEKS” of us AT MACKENZIE SEEN IT SHOWED EVAN TRIED TO GET HIM TO GET A 3 Sum w me AT DUMBASS BITCH FOR TRYING TO JUMP ME AT 18/19 CAUSE I TOLD HER WHILE DATING JUSTIN ITS WEIRD YOU GOTTA PHOTOSHOP YAL TOGETHER BUT ME N HIM BE TOGETHER NOT KNOWING HE WAS ONLINE DATING HER TIL ME N HIM BROKE UP … MEGAN DIVINE SEEN IT PASSED IT FOR HER USC ENTRANCE …AT WHATEVER MOM THAT WAS WHO GOT TRIALS AND JAIL TIME FOR THE USC KIDS TUITION .. AGAIN INTUITION BEEN TRYING TO WARN ME LIKE LEXIS DEATH MY BODY JUST KNOWS THINGS WHEN SHITS WEIRD BUT YOU CANNOT FUCKING GROW MUCH IN THE ENVIRONMENT THAT HURTS YOU WHICH IVE PUT AND SHOWN EXPLICITLY ON MY FUCKING BLOG. AND THE SECOND I GET AWAY FROM THE TRAUAMA KILLING ME AND IM ON MY OWN I HAD SOOOOOO MUCH TRAUMA RELEASE GROWTH AND SPIRITUAL FOOTWORK FOUND N STEPPED INTO MY WHOLE COSMIC DESTINY ….AND THEN BOOOM I MAKE FUCKING STRIDES ON MY OWN …NO ONE SAID PERFECT BUT A HELL OF A LOT BETTER THAN WHAT I CAME FROM…THOSE SAME FUCKERS COME RUNNING BACK IN AND TRAPPING ME 🖕 HOWrd AND BEN FEELING THEY SHOULD HAVE JUST POPED UP ON ME AND HANDED ME BACK TO BEN / TAKEN ME WHEN THEY HAD THE CHANCE TO MY RIGHTFUL PLACE TO BE HOWARD NOV 9th VACCINE SHOULD HAVE JUST HANDED ME OVER TO THE AUTHORITIES AND ADMITTED PERJURY FUCKING THEN INSTEAD OF DOING THIS WHOLE FUCKING ..” we WANA show you how strong you are and WHAT ELSE BS HAS BEEN DONE IN YOUR NAME” 8 month journey …THE FIRST ONE NEVER COMPLETED YAL WANTED TO FINISH IT NOW …I’m fucking over and tired and done. DAE SHUT THE LITERAL FUCK UP. YOU GOT MY FUCKING NUDES AFTER THE MILITARY OR AFTER SAID YOU FUCKED ME N SOME MORE WEIRD SHIT. ILL TAKE BACK U HAVING AIDS WHEN YOUNADMIT BUT YOU DID RAPE LAUREN AND YOU DO HAVE STDS 🖕ALISSA SEEN N PASSED IT FOR HER MOMS APARTMENT DURING COLLEGE THEN FURTHER THE SPIRITUAL BULLSHIT “had I known I wouldn’t have” THE ISSUE IS YOU FUCKING DID FOR SOME EASY FUCKING MONEY THEN CALLED ME CRAZY WHEN INWANTED TO TALK AND TOOK ANOTHER PAYOUT TO NOT TALK. FUCK THAT. FEDERAL for extortion FOR THOSE WHO WILLINGLY PARTOOK THEN PULLED THE “Amanda bones” card on me ✌️

[alokkashyap123]

How to manage stress as an Entrepreneur

Alok Kashyap | Hi! Let me self introduce, I am Alok Kashyap a tech professional with a vivid career as a program manager in The United States. Those who are close to me often say ”Automobile, tech, and passion for entrepreneurship are the three things that drive Alok Kashyap!”

Many of my colleagues and friends ask me “Is entrepreneurship stressful”?

Well, I wouldn't lie. Yes, it is. It is quite stressful.

I see many people at the top of the success ladder who deal with stress daily. Tracing their movements like a shadow, it lurks in wait to strike. Stress can become overwhelming and have repercussions if it is not properly controlled.

Recently, I attended a seminar, that had a group of professionals talking about the daily level of stress a person has to go through in his life whether they are a working professional or a businessman, or an entrepreneur. There, I gathered many points which has stayed with me, one of them is, that stress has a psychological impact that impairs even the most prosperous person's ability to function effectively. 

Here are some stress-reduction strategies that I have followed for a time to stay stress-free and perform at my best. I hope this works for you too.

Grateful - Appreciating what I have.

Always keeping in mind the positive aspects of the situation might help us cope with disappointment and stop worrying about the little things. Failure or misfortune does not take away from your successes or diminish the good things that did occur. The most effective defense against stress is a happy, healthy mindset. Maintain perspective, reflect on your progress, acknowledge your successes, and press on.

Remain concentrated on the greater things.

Keep in mind that perfection is not necessary. Examine things from a wider angle: Is progressing or paying attention to every last detail more crucial? Is the how less important than the why? You and your team don't have time for perfectionism when you're establishing an empire, as it's a draining process that eventually leads to burnout. Life is full of failures since no one is flawless. The most crucial lesson is to remember what counts in the long term and to learn from your failures.

The whole is greater than the sum of the parts.

A strong team is your strenght. Reward achievement and hard effort with relationships; also, remember to move aside and let top achievers carry out their duties. Not only do you lack the time to try to control every minute aspect, but you also cannot control every single element. Your company will suffer if, after reading this, you believe that you DO have the time to oversee every small detail. You are not performing your duties. Trust is really important. You have to have faith in this individual if you hire them. Leave this individual alone to complete their work unless they are blatantly underperforming.

Attending to your own needs.

It is impossible to expect to be mentally good if you are not physically fit. Let's start with the fundamentals: Eat, sleep, and get moving. In particular, exercise aids in stress reduction. Create a workout regimen so that you can release all of your stored-up energy. Your mind can be opened and calmed by yoga or meditation, but ultimately, do what feels right for you. Sure, yoga is in, but if you'd rather run, box, or lift weights, then, by all means, do so. Engage in activities you enjoy and that relieve tension. 

Get away from the mundane.

Take some time to escape and enjoy a vacation. A shift in environment can help you see things from a fresh and new angle. Closing off the distractions of daily life will provide you with much-needed rest, as well as the chance to review your business objectives. Whether you decide to travel to meet new people and have new experiences, or to turn off your phone and spend three days alone at home, the act of disconnecting will help you reconnect with yourself.

Continue to have a support system.

Maintain relationships with people outside of your workplace. Don't keep your tension to yourself; share your life with others. See a therapist one-on-one or attend a support group if needed. Having a sacred space where you may confidentially discuss your ambitions, objectives, and worries is acceptable. Establish enduring, trustworthy relationships with people you feel comfortable confiding in. Remember to repay the favor by listening to their concerns as well. Writing down your emotions might also be beneficial. Eliminate the bad thoughts from your mind to avoid becoming stuck inside of it and being unable to escape.

Make a plan.

Make a plan and stick to it, whether it's for your business or a way to decompress. Share your business idea with others so they can support you. Collaborate to achieve a common objective. Make time for self-care in your schedule if you are concerned that you won't have enough. Making plans will help you stay on course. You'll be fully aware of your whereabouts and your destination. Concerned that you could forget something? Put it in writing. Maintain organization to reduce stress.

Stress management is crucial for entrepreneurs. You have to stop running because you will ultimately become exhausted. You are under a great deal of pressure, from both yourself and everyone around you. Although it could seem overwhelming, it doesn't have to be. An important distinction between less successful and successful entrepreneurs is how well they handle stress. Which would you rather be in charge of—stress or yourself?

[legaciestold]

@myersbprd continued from x

ellie’s gaze hones in upon him for the briefest of moments and without a thought upon how automatic the action is. whenever he’s around her, it’s natural to seek him out, to gravitate toward him; and she wonders if he realizes he often does the same. ellie imagines it doesn’t help quell any of the rumors he always returns home to and frankly, she doesn’t much care. if anything, it only serves to amuse her because the more he gets teased for an imagined affair with a succubus, the more his mind is brought back to her without her working any of the charms of her own powers. irregardless, ellie can see the toll the flight has taken upon him. the way john’s skin is just a fraction of a shade paler and his eyes have the beginnings of redness and strain from the lack of meaningful rest. she notes he seems to have come straight from the airport too and that would typically ellict a comment from her about him being free to share her bedroom yet instead all she truly wonders in the fraction of the moments between their gazes is if flying gives him migraines. ellie couldn’t be positive though she has seen the same signs prior in lawyers who had flown in from across the country to face her in court or in a board room. at least one of them, she knew, had a terrible time with flying so much so that he’d spent a good hour regaling her about his migraines and the fact he could never find a medication that succeeded in quelling them during flights. she’d slept with him just to shut him up and if he’d been so wiped of energy after that he actually got a peaceful sleep on the flight home, well, that wasn’t her doing some twisted form of a good deed, no, it was her gaining the energy she needed to survive. of course that wasn’t here nor there and ellie’s observation is quickly glossed over within her own mind as she looks toward the folder in john’s hand. 

he’s done his homework. she knew he would. 

“not just now, john. you can’t bring them in at all. not normal agents and certainly not the fish guy or liz. not that i care if they die but i can’t be certain their deaths wouldn’t make our enemy stronger.” she doesn’t address how she knows of these people. ellie’s certainly never been invited to the bprd headquarters or any of it’s ghost sites she’s sure they have. in truth, while john’s been the only agent she helps-- a fact she’s vocally expressed around other agents that he’s the only point of contact she’s willing to work with-- this little bit of information might indicate she’s been involved with at least one other agent in a different capacity that allowed her to gather information. (and that had been the sum total of the interest she’d had in said other agent before sending him on his way to never speak to again though, she’s not entirely sure he survived the mission he’d been on shortly after with his depleted energy. but! she hadn’t killed him, so that wasn’t her fault really.) 

ellie doesn’t give him a chance to inquire. equally, her mind is so focused on what she’s brought him there to aid with that she doesn’t even ponder if any inferences he might make may invoke any form of jealousy within him. “you need to toss all that fbi training shit out the window for this one. victimology isn’t going to help you. trying to profile the bad guys isn’t either. it’s all more simple and yet complicated than that. it’s more primal. it’s survival and need.” there’s something bitter about the fact she understands their motivations all too well that causes her to grimace. they needed steam to live. she needed energy to live. the difference was, she didn’t need to cause pain unless she wanted to to get it. she also didn’t have to kill even if there had been times she had. 

ellie drops her gaze away from john’s, focusing on the bloody map instead. so many drops. too many drops that it causes goosebumps to cross her skin. had it been adults, she wouldn’t care. she shouldn’t care that it’s children either, frankly. how disappointed her mother must be. demons were meant to cause chaos and destruction. they were meant to bring forth terror and pain. inflict it upon others, to take pleasure in it and perhaps to feel an even greater satisfaction from corrupting the purely innocent. balthazar certainly had. maybe that’s why her mother had so easily influenced ellie and her father’s brutal murder. (and it had been brutally violent, horrific even to the point the crime scene photos rivaled the ones which were likely in john’s folder-- had he ever looked at them when inquiring about her? then again, maybe he wasn’t even aware she’d actually died before.) but ellie had never been a full-fledged demon. had never been able to shed, even in death and in hell, her father completely from her cells. she supposed constantine had been right when he’d called her a failed demon even if she did a very many demonic things. sometimes ellie wished she could be like her mother, twisted and evil without a care for the life of humans beyond corruption and pain, wished she could have made her proud. wished she could have corrupted tali and not fallen in love with him. it would have made life so much easier. 

she offers john an incredulous look. “you’d have to be blind not to see all the missing posters or the news reports about found bodies.” except, while that might explain her knowledge of cases which happened in los angeles or the surrounding cities, that didn’t explain the fact she cared or that she’d followed the cases that spanned the entire state or the ones on the map which drifted past state lines or her own ragged appearance and red hued eyes that screamed lack of sleep because she’d been too invested in what she’s uncovered thus far. had she even slept since she called him yesterday? had she bothered to partake in other activities which would grant her more alertness and general vigor since she started this? “it doesn’t fucking matter how i know about it. what matters is i know where they’re going.”