#nOT A VENT BTW JUST SILLY LATE NIGHT THOUGHTS

[watermel0ns-dumb-cringe]

I wonder if my fixation on fictional siblings that were doomed/tragic at some point is because I lived it irl 😨

[dungeons-and-dragon-age]

Ohhh how about 2, 3, 6, 15, 25, 90 and 99 for alistair/kala, lilian/bela/(AND MERRILL‼️‼️) and ari/josie :]

[ask game]

Oooo so many, thank you!! >>:]

2. Who is the one who fusses the most? Does their S/O mind very much?

Kala/Alistair: hmmm. I wanna say Kala? Neither of them is super fussy but, well, Alistair is the one who is more likely to neglect his own needs (consciously or subconsciously) and Kala Will notice and react to that very quickly

Lilian/Isabela/Merrill: Isabela. She isn't pushy about it thought or babies them so they don't mind; and, well, she is usually right about it lol

Ari/Josephine: both lol. They're both stubborn bitches who overwork themselves and are both exasperated when the other doesn't take care of themselves. They do get somewhat annoyed about it sometimes but it's also part of their love language.

3. What is their love language?

Kala/Alistair: For Kala, in general, acts of service; favours that come with no strings attached. Most of the time any sort of service is a transaction, where she would neither want to offer nor be offered a favour. I don't owe you, you don't owe me, it's a Done And Dusted deal. So for her acts of service aren't only "i am doing this because i care about you" but also "i do this because i trust you to not take advantage of it/ i appreciate that you trust me the same way".

With Alistair specifically it's mostly touch, from both sides. She also makes an effort to remember being verbally affectionate, since it's something Alistair thrives on but she isn't very good at. Over time they've compromised by developing their own little sign language with things like say, finger tap patterns for things like "i love you" or "proud of you" or asking for a kiss

Lilian/Isabela: She is. Incredibly bad at saying I love you out loud rip. So instead she says it by letting you sleep in while she does the laundry and walks the dog (she hates getting up early btw). By walking you all the way to your doorstep after a late night out even if it's a detour. Also, by buying you little trinkets or other frivolous things. This one took her a long time to accept because she kept thinking it's vain and silly, but really it's that what makes it precious to her. Giving someone something for no reason but "this made me think of you" or "i thought you might like it"

For Bela i think a lot of it is spending quiet time together, away from eyes, away from Being Perceived, where they can just. Exist in the same space and be mundane and sappy together. A lot of it is in the Commitment TM. "I am doing this For You and With You, On Purpose"

Merrill is very very verbal and touchy with her affection, but she also shares Lilian's love for gifting trinkets. Downtime spent together is also always precious, of course (especially since postgame she doesn't see the other two nearly as often)

Ari/Josephine: He is very good at taking note of little things his loved ones like, and going out of his way to arrange those things, preferably in a way where they don't notice that it was him so they don't feel indebted or obliged to return the favour (also he loves watching their reaction). Also, if there are little ways in which he can make Josie's life easier or take weight off her shoulders he will gladly do so.

Josephine also does this for sure, but her affection comes in the form of touch a lot, too. Small gestures in public/formal settings when she can get away with it, but in private she is an absolute cuddle bug. This was slow at first because Ari started out a little uncomfortable about it, but it was mostly because he wasn't sure how to accept/reciprocate physical affection Appropriately TM. Took some time to make him relax about it but once he does he appreciates it.

Oh and of course, venting and sharing tea (both kinds) together u.u

6. Who would ask the "would you love me if I were a worm?" question? How would their S/O answer?

Kala/Alistair: Kala would ask it out of the blue one time and then just shrug her shoulders about it when Ali gets "???" about it (she was watching a worm and thought about what it would be like to be a worm) (she does not elaborate this)

Lilian/Isabela/Merrill: Merrill asks it one time when they're all tipsy/drunk and it evolves into a whole scale pseudo-philosophical discussion about the intricacies of being (or loving) a worm

Ari/Josie: Look they are playing mind chess against each other for fun in a weird game that only they get so there is a good chance that "would you love me if I were a worm" is code for something and the reaction would entirely depend on what the layers of that sentence are

15. How do they comfort one another when the other is upset?

Kala/Alistair: Alistair still often falls back into invalidating his own feelings when he is upset so simply prompting him to vent anyways and listening to him already does wonders. Once he's got it out of his system there's space to Give Actual Practical Suggestions or make elaborate over-complicated revenge plans, depending on how serious the cause for his grief was.

Kala for her part never quite gets the hang of Involving Others when she is upset and prefers to work through it herself, so Alistair gives her the space to do just that but makes sure to let her know he is there for her if she needs it (she does usually gratefully accept the offer to cuddle, once she's done brooding)

Lilian/Isabela: Lilian also has the tendency to retreat into herself with her problems, but Isabela is good at noticing this and offering to talk, or get a drink, and just generally make sure Lilian doesn't trap herself in a bad mental place without cornering her. Also getting her something sweet; that's always a good way to cheer her up.

Isabela has a similar problem but she's a bit better at externalising it, to Lilian's relief. Trying to reassure her with words feels oddly clumsy, so instead she'll ask if there is a way she can help and does her best to take as many tasks and mundane worries off Bela's shoulders as she can.

Ari/Josephine: They're both avid ranters, and both good listeners, so a lot of the time it boils down to them listening to the other vent out their frustrations at each other

25. Do they have any pet names for one another?

..i am not gonna lie i am Really Bad at thinking up pet names jfkslfdlfsdklf but Kala isn't much of a pet name person but she Will have a silly nickname or two that she'll use sometimes. Lilian and Isabela definitely are both nickname and pet name people, in fact so much that they rarely use each others' real names lol

With Ari i'm not sure if he'd start using pet names after a while, but his parents 100% call Josie "kutti" (a tamil endearment) very fast lol they love her

90. Would they ever consider starting a family?

Kala/Alistair: Not really, no. Kala isn't comfortable with the thought of having children, biological or other, and considering their life situation (tainted, living on a timer, usually occupied) it just doesn't feel like a viable option anyway. Not to mention that Al's uh. Situation with Kieran probably makes him reluctant about it as well.

Lilian/Isabela/Merrill: Also a no. Merrill is the most open to the idea but the other two would rather be aunts or something, if anything. Lilian and Bela to take in kids into their crew sometimes when they find one that needs temporary shelter/care and is generally old enough to look after themselves, and that's as close as they'll get to being parents.

Ari/Josephine: So far it hasn't really been a consideration and it's by no means an active goal, but it's not something they explicitly don't want. It just not something that's been on their radar

99. Who gives off "they said no pickles" energy?

Kala/Alistair: Take a guess lol (it's Kala)

Lilian/Isablea/Merrill: yes.

Ari/Josephine: Ari gives off the energy but Josie's the one who is actually the "he said no pickles" one

[warden-melli]

Not pokemon related but fuck these last few years have been tough. Been trying to distract myself all night but I think I need to vent for a sec

Trigger warning after the cut

I don’t want to get into details, but my uncle killed himself this morning. I knew something was wrong straight away when my mother randomly turned up with that look on her face. My grandmother was diagnosed with dementia last year, and my grandfather is in kidney failure, so at first I thought something bad and happened to them, but no. It was my uncle.

I spent a lot of today with my dad. My uncle was his little brother, and quite frankly as sad as I am for what happened to my uncle, I’m most worried about my dad right now. Not only did he lose both his father and older sister within the last year or so, but he’s been in pretty poor health himself. He was involved in an accident at work earlier this year involving a chainsaw, and honestly he’s lucky to be alive. PPE did it’s job, but even so he still ended up losing a tooth, and he’s had to have dental/implant surgeries to repair the damage. The last few weeks he’s also been extremely ill having caught Ross River fever from a job site. I have never seen him this sick in my entire life, and it has been extremely distressing seeing him in so much pain. He’s recovering from being sick, but he’s had an absolutely terrible run of luck, and that’s not even all of it. His best friend/brother in law has lung cancer, his sister just had a heart attack after contracting covid, and another of his sisters was just in a major car accident (he’s one of 10 kids btw). Also his pet budgie died last week. I feel horrible for him and I wish I could do something to make it better.

The last few weeks have been really tough. I broke my wisdom tooth, and because I am really bad at telling if/where I’m in pain I kinda tried to live with an exposed nerve for a few weeks before realising that it was serious. I knew something was wrong, but I have tmjd so I just kinda thought it was a chronic pain flare up at first. Like a really bad one, but I tried to ignore it. I had the back of my knee tattooed while dealing with a cracked wisdom tooth oof. After I figured out it wasn’t going to go away I eventually went to the dentist and had it extracted, but that was really hard for me to deal with. I was happy that the sharp pain had gone, but my jaw has been extremely sore since, and I really struggled sensory wise during the healing period. Then I broke my guitar and my fridge broke, so that’s over $1000 on top of the dental bills -_-

Idk life feels really hard lately. Haven’t been able to draw much, and have just been feeling flat in general. And now my uncle has passed and I just feel terrible. I’ll be okay. My sister is due to have a baby within weeks, and I’ve got some good concerts to look forward to, so it’s not all bad. One of my little sisters has been a twenty one pilots fan since she was literally an infant, and she’s finally old enough to see them live and I was able to get her really good tickets. She’s autistic too and has been working on her outfit and making stickers, and every time I see her that’s all she can talk about. I’m so happy for her and that I get to take her. There is good stuff, and good people and as silly as it sounds Melli/Pokemon really helps. He’s so so special to me. I’m glad I have him to focus on

I just needed to get stuff off of my chest, so if you’ve made it this far thanks for listening. Even if no one reads this just typing it out made me feel a bit better. May be a bit less active for a while, might be way more active. Idk how my brain wants to handle this lol

[wychive]

𝙪𝙣𝙨𝙥𝙤𝙠𝙚𝙣 𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙙𝙨

summary // you found your pile of ‘letters’ to hyunjin that contain thoughts that have never been said and decided to write to him one last time.

pairing(s) // hyunjin x gn!reader, hyunjin x oc, slight minho x reader

genre(s) // angst, letter fic 

warning(s) // mentions of food, themes of being forgotten, vulgar wording, humiliation, overthinking

word count // 2.0k

author's note // happy birthday @noya-sannnn​ !! im sorry this was so late hhh you know how i am irl,, but i hope you enjoy this! i love you so much, jane <3 i apologize for the many grammar mistakes gn. i recommend listening to iu’s ending scene while reading this! btw y/n/n means your nickname.

[10/01/14, 3:55am]

dear jinnie,

hi there! it's y/n <3 i hope you're doing okay - i mean of course you are pfft anyways, just writing this short letter (more like paragraph)  sort of as a venting mechanism? for things i cant tell you about lol  im not so sure how you would call it, since you're so much better at words than i am. basically were like:

hyunjin: ow a brain freeze!

me: haha brain go brrrr

anyways haha yea <3 it's 4am so like,, ill see you at school!

signed,

your loser,

y/n/n

[15/02/14, 12:34am]

yo heartthrob!

im back with this kinda stuff haha it's been a whole? week? since ive written one of these so like yes..hi! i just wanted to say thanks, for today. you really know how to cheer me up huh? you really outdid yourself by setting up that little picnic for us. congrats on making the strawberry cake so perfectly <3 this day will always stay as a core memory in the back of my brain. you're too caring sometimes,,, istg you'll pay for this [maybe hugs?] >:) 

signed,

your partner in crime,

y/n/n

[30/02/15, 01:29am]

jinnie-senpai~~

LMAO you hate me calling you that, doesn't change a thing though. hehe,, nways i hope you enjoyed your birthday present :) i got you that really cool skateboard that you wanted. i worked my ass off for that in my mother's garden so like,, you gotta thank me for that a thousand times :D nah jk, its a sincere gift, from me to you. i rarely do this for ANYONE so consider yourself lucky to have a best friend like me -3- also, seungmin is like….kinda the cutest person ever. introduce me to him pls, thank!

signed,

<your bestest friend3,

y/n

(p.s. you're kinda cute too,,,, ig,,, still stinkee tho)

[13/04/15, 9:04pm]

hey 'baby' (HAHAHA ihy for this)

i hope your day was okay! i didn't see much of you today (which was sort of a bummer but wtv) so like…. uh yea. you told me you were doing okay over text, which kinda surprised me because like?? we always video call lol this is kinda the first time,, but its okay, i trust you! (i really hope youre doing alright tho, i'll beat anyone up if they make you sad >:( ) you also called me 'sweetheart' today which was like…. omg wtf haha????????? that was so weird to me for some reason… a good kind of weird :D we haven't done those kinds of nicknames in a while so…. happy to know that they're back in session <3 i talked to the new girl today, she's really cool! like she knows the bean song on tiktok so like its a total win heh, ill introduce you to her tomorrow! you'll love her a lot

signed,

your 'lover',

y/n/n

[08/06/16, 10:23pm]

hey howl (hehe go back to that movie night we had)

this spring break sucks so much,, esp because youre not here (you still couldve brought me along :'[ ) but wtv i hope youre enjoying yourself. ive been hanging out with yeonnie lately and i found out she likes conan grey too like pls i love her sm. can we adopt her?? please???? she told me you guys have been video calling too and that makes me so happy!! you two are getting along so well aaa my precious babies </3 

what if you developed a crush on her? haha…..jk unless?? (no jk dont shes all mine, stay away >:) ) anyways, i hope the three of us hang out soon. maybe go to that ice cream parlour where they serve the best cookies and cream?  

signed,

your daisy,

y/n/n

[19/07/15, 01:23am]

peepee poopoo hello

heyheyhey!! (heh, haikyuu thingz) i hope youre doing okay! i mean sure you are, with everything going so well. also i feel like you're not telling me something. maybe it's just me? is it? i hope it is because you tell me everything,, we've been talking less these days but its okay! i know how busy you are, especially with your dad always bugging you,,

also, i think yeonbin likes you :0,, she keeps talking about you whenever we hang out. don't get me wrong, its not bad that she likes you but...something doesn't feel right. i feel like i'm being the third wheeler here and like ugh idk. haha laughs yea i think its just me.. im sorry, i didnt mean to do you like this,, anyways, ill see you soon + her too ofc- yall are inseparable lmao

signed,

your moonlight,

y/n/n

[23/07/15, 01:56am]

greetings, kind sir

lol more like mean sir but like aight KSKSK,, anyways,, how have you been? we haven't really talked in a while,, our convos are always so short with it being one-sided :/ i wish you were online more. yeonnie is ignoring me,, do you know why? i think you do,,, but when i asked you just said you didnt know. did i do something wrong? pls tell me.. 

she blocked my contact the other day and she won't even smile at me when i pass her in the hallways. its,, sad and stressful especially because she was the only one that would genuinely talk to me. i hate to say this,, but i miss you. us, hanging out like the best trio we are, yknow? but i dont think you miss me the same way. sorry, im getting out of hand. i know im just overreacting. im just gonna sleep ig,, good night! sweet dreams,,

signed,

your pink lemonade,

y/n/n

[25/07/15, 03:25am]

hi there

i heard you and her got together?? congrats, jinnie! im so proud of you,, especially because you never had even considered getting a girlfriend a few months earlier lmaO you really woo the ladies huh? anyways,, i hope you've been well since we last talked,, how many days has it been?? i would say nearly a week or so but honestly it feels like a hundred years,, considering you and i used to talk every day. but you have her now to keep you company.

keep this a secret but can you possibly tell me why it hurts when i see her? or when i mention her or even think of her?? is it because she's connected to you? but.. you're my best friend, so why? is it because i miss you? is it because im alone now? is it because you left me with a simple 'i have to go now,, bye y/n/n.'? im not sure either. im being silly, i apologize. ill figure it out sooner or later. sweet dreams, jinnie

signed,

your asswipe,

y/n

[25/07/15, 04:30am]

jinnie

it's because i love you. 

signed,

your butterfly,

y/n

[??/08/??, 05:??am]

you

i miss your lame jokes. i miss your smile. i miss your laughs. i miss your funny faces. i miss the way your eyes twinkle. i miss th way you would make me happy just by doing the bare minimum. i miss the disaster you made when cooking breakfast. i miss the night when you snuck me out just to go to that pretty lantern event. i miss when you would call out my name everytime we met. i miss when we would share earbuds in train rides. dont you get it, hyunjin? i miss you.

[??/??/15, ??:??am]

asshole.

please tell me that isn't true, please. you're too kind to do these kinds of things, right? + i was your best friend,, then, why, why did you hurt me like this. i didnt do anything wrong.. you couldve just told me you didnt like me,,, why did she have to tell me? out of all people. 

youre so pathetic for this,, i thought you were brave, bold - but youre just a fucking coward. i loved you, i really did. and i realised too late… im sorry. she,, i shouldn't have talked to her in the first place, right? i bet you knew she humiliated me, in front of everyone. of course you did, you were the only one that knew. you told her. fuck, i hate you so much (yet why do i long for you on a night like this?). you know how much that'll affect me and yet, there you are, laughing about it with her.

signed,

fuck off,

you know who i am.

[31/08/15, 03:41am]

ah, jinnie

please tell me this is just a nightmare. please, please. stop just reading my texts, please answer them. jinnie. i miss you so much. i dont care bout her, please just let me be in your arms. i dont care if you love me back, please just talk to me at least. tell me what i did wrong,, jinnie,, please,,, clear these tear stains on my cheek with kisses.

signed,

your fuck-up,

y/n

[15/09/15, 04:59am]

jinnie

why do i keep crying because of you? its been a few weeks since everything has happened. please, nothing has changed. i still love you the same even with all the hatred i have pent up in this stupid brain of mine. i wish i could just walk back in time, to where it all began.

when i first met you in third grade and you pushed me while playing soccer or maybe when we took those ridiculous prom pictures, remember those? i hope you still have them,, because i do too. i hope the pictures of us on your wall still hang there,, it'll remind you of the happy times. hm,, maybe you don't need them. 

you already have millions of pictures with you and her,, i bet you printed some and replaced those with ours right? sly dog. 

signed,

friend,

y/n/n

[04/02/16, 12:57am]

hey

i went to the park today and saw both of you being happy. it's nice to see your smile again. im sorry i didnt go up to you,, i just thought it would be awkward. when i heard that adorable laugh of yours, it made me realise that i lost something special. but it's okay isnt it? as your happiness matters more than mine. 

signed,

y/n

[06/01/20, 08:00pm]

dear hyunjin,

im doing fine here. how about you? gosh,, how long has it been? years? since we last talked to each other. i havent heard from you since. i would just like to say i still think of you sometimes, when watering the plants or dancing while making pancakes. sometimes i think you're here with me too, just being the pals we were. 

sometimes i'd see you out, just reading a book in the park or buying pasta sauce at the grocery store. it's nice to see you having a stable life. im not sure if you're still with her or not, but its good to know that you still have that large friend group. also! you're never gonna guess who im dating--

it's minho! do you remember him? the one that i used to hate,, uh yeah. he asked me out the other day- you may wonder how tf,,, i too do not know how tf but he gives the best hugs ever. he gave me the love i wanted from you. he stitched my heart back together after it broke,, i love him so much, jinnie..

it's snowing,, do you remember when we would skate on the frozen lake in front of your house? are your parents well? i wonder if your mother still has those earrings i bought for her birthday. i never told you this but your laugh and hers sound so similar. 

i would just like to say thank you, for everything. you were a big part of my life, up until now. when we see each other after this, we would just be strangers. maybe flash a little smile or give a little wave whenever we greet each other but nothing more. some memories of us would flow in every now and then but it'll just be a short teaser. well, i'll be going now. smile for me, okay?

signed,

the one that loved you the most,

y/n.

taglist // @/noya-sannnn, @crvgio​ , @neo-shitty​

reply to be in my gen taglist!

[veralovemail]

Hi! I would love myself a matchup if it's ok 👉👈

I'm female and pan, I'd prefer one of the males tho, Survivors please!

So uhhhh I differ in my personality a lot depending on the situation! I'm more of a loner around strangers IRL— shy, quiet, I don't like interacting and prefer to stay by the sidelines since being in the middle makes me uncomfy.

I try to be as polite as I can, even keeping in my opinions and pain a lot as to not Hurt anyone. I also tend to blame myself a lot for bad situations I'm a part in unless I know I absolutely didn't do anything!

Also I'm quite hot headed and have a bad temper, though I'm working on it! I have quite the problem with guilt and it comes to me fairly quickly when I do something bad.

Ah yeah I'm really forgetful and also really impatient KNRKS

Now- online!!

I'm a lot more open and chaotic. I like to tease my friends and jokingly make fun of them, etc. I try and stop when they tell me to, but I might understand it as them just joking too if they write it that way in my eyes-

I try to look on the positive side for them and their situations and am always willing to make someone happy even without words since it makes me happy too. I'd say I'm caring to a fault- I don't let loose until they finally do something healthy that they've been avoiding and I do get rather angry if I'm not taken seriously with that, causing me to maybe lash out at someone unwillingly,,- and then guilt pops in like "hi there 😍" KDHDJDJ

Anyway,

I encourage anyone to vent, though I'm not the best at giving advice. I'm more of a person who likes to listen and give support if they need it. Oh yeah- my attention span is REALLY short (as short as me good ol' 5'1 me aNENSJJSJD) so I get distracted pretty easily and procrastinate then.

As for hobbies: I love to draw! (As you might know-)Music is my life (especially Jazz) and video games are, too. Though mostly singleplayer Games since I only really like multiplayer with friends-

What else can I write..

Maybe like- I'm an ISFP-T And I think it was 5w6 that I was given by another test

I also got Philophobia, the fear of falling in love because of bad experiences but I'm tryna work on it!!

I guess I can also write about my appearance? I've got short, curly but chaotic black hair that's p much swept to the side- I'm definitely not that skinny lmao- and as I've said before, I'm 5'1! I usually wear casual clothes (hoodies, e.g!! They're so comfy...) I also got brown eyes and glasses!

I think that should be it.. ah yeah! In your introduction, you should prolly add your ID for others to add you because name search doesn't work! :0

Ok that's really it now- take your time, don't rush yourself and stay safe and hydrated!! 💕💕 Hope your blog takes off!

Sorry for my English by the way- I'm German so I might've messed up on a few things!

OH MY LORD I DID NOT KNOW THAT I HAD TO PUT IN MY ID... oml... thank u for telling me that. and don't worry about it, i can see how it'd be difficult (i actually studied german for my gcses :], it was very fun) but anyways! tysm for sending in btw!! i loved writing this, i hope u enjoy - mod vera ♡

i match you with ... naib subedar!

he kinda takes on to your quiet personality, unlike some of the other people around the manor. it's relaxing to be around somebody who doesn't talk much.

you two most likely met when robbie came over to the survivors' side of the mansion, jokingly demanding sweets... but it most likely sounded authentic. and oh god, is that an axe-

you two accidentally locked eyes but you both had a " ah shit, here we go again " face. it just kinda went from there.

at first, he's a tough nut to crack, but if you try hard enough, within a month or so you gain his trust and he .. deems you a friend?

you both kinda start falling for eachother after a period of time, but naib is great at hiding it BUT SIKE, so are you! it's like a game of who can pine for the other in the most subtle way possible.

however, if you tell him about your own troubles with falling in love, he may just open up a little too about his own troubles.

it's takes a while for you two to build a relationship, but eventually (after a lot of rescues, late night hangouts and just being near eachother) you make it!

when he learns about your more chaotic side, naib tries to keep up with you as best he can, he may just need a little tug to do so.

he loves your smile, especially the one you have when you're talking about your passions.

he also tries to help with your temper, but he's just as bad as you are.

however, he's there whenever you have a bad day - he can almost instantly tell, even if you try keep it to yourself. it could be the way you look at him, try to smile or talk, he does notice the change in your aura.

since your shorter than him, he likes holding you. it makes him feel like he's just protecting you from anything and anything, especially on one of your bad days.

he likes your optimism, looking on the good side of every situation. he once saw you trying to comfort robbie when he started crying about not finding any sweets around and you told him "look on a brightside robbie! now we know for next time to stash some away for you before we eat it all!" AND OH GOD, IS THAT AN AXE?

naib gets frequent nightmares about his time being a hired merc, so sometimes you may get woken up at 3 am because he's a bit distressed and needs a bit of comfort.

other times, he just finds holding you while you're fast asleep enough to put him back in a coma for the next 2 hours.

naib also encourages you to talk to him about stuff. whether it be what made you mad, how much of a bitch vera can be, ect. he's there for you and that man is never gonna let you carry your burdens alone.

saying that, you also have to remind him that he can't carry his own burdens sometimes and when you encourage him to talk to you about what's upsetting him, he'll most likely tell, depending on how bad it is.

he also grounds you a lot!! if you tell him about your forgetfulness, he's most likely going to try and remind you.

" hey, [ name ], you did bring [ item ] into the match, right? "

" um... "

" goddamnit [ name ], i thought i reminded you "

naib takes it upon himself to rescue you, or keep you within his general vicinity if you're in a match with him. he does know you can kite very well though! he just wants you near him for a bit of reassurance.

he can be mean sometimes, but he means it in the most endearing way possible since most of it is sarcasm.

you two kinda have " stab as a warning " vibes so nobody really opposes the two of you. even norton. not even freddy dares to oppose you because the last time he did, aesop almost had to prepare his equipment to embalm the poor fella.

when you lash out at someone, naib is there almost immediately to take you away to calm down and comfort you when your guilt kicks the door down and goes " Hey girlie! Hold still 😎 "

sometimes you have to do the same for him because you both have a tendency to lash out.. but.. never at eachother? you two kinda agree on the same things, there isn't much to exactly disagree on.

please draw him!! watch him while he's training in the garden and draw him, or just a few silly doodles of him.

he likes looking at your drawings, it kinds boosts his ego knowing that he's worthy enough to be drawn.

if he finds out that you like music, he'll tell you about nepalese music, or at least what he knew of it - if you both get engrossed in it, he may try and get you some records to play.

teach him how to dance, if you can. it'd make listening to music together way more fun.

he's very content with you!! he likes kissing you out of nowhere, too. you could just be chilling and naib would come up to you, turn you around and give you a smooch outta nowhere. but only in private.

i feel like neither of you would be big on pda, you just stick to holding hands around the manor.

if this were in a modern setting, you two could probably play a game like phasmaphobia together just for funsies.

all in all, your relationship with naib is mutually beneficial and robbie has learned to never ask for sweets again.

i hope you enjoy this <3 it's my first time writing naib too so i apologise if it's not very good </3

[spencer-is-too-perfect]

Secrets

I’M BACKKKK! Okay, so, clearly, school is a bitch. School and the fact that I haven’t been feeling well lately made me take a loooong time to update. But here it is! Btw, most of this was written since last Friday. A week and a day ago. I just had to write the final scene and it was hard for me to get time + motivation. But your requests are making me so happy and so inspired! Thank you so much!

Request: Could you write a Luke alvez x reader where the reader is part of the team and had a difficult past but confides in Luke?

Warnings: Mentions of rape, I think that’s it.

Word Count: 1,5K

Pairings: Luke Alvez x Friend! Reader (I didn’t know if you wanted romance or not, so I opted not to make them a couple. I think it fits better the story <3)

“Hey, (y/n)!”

“How are you today, (y/n)?”

“Take care, (y/n).”

“Glad to see you, (y/n).”

Those were the words you heard everyday from your coworker, Luke Alvez.

“Hey, Luke!”

“I’m good, how about you, Luke?”

“You too, Luke.”

“Glad to see you too, Luke.”

This was how you answered.

You were friends. You hung out outside of work, you told things to each other… You were friends.

Becoming close with Luke Alvez seemed like a fairly good idea when you met. You were the two new agents on the BAU. You knew no one. So, while you got closer to the team, you also got closer and closer to each other.

But he didn’t know everything about your life.

He knew most of it. He knew about your experiences in school, he knew about your family… He didn’t know about the most important thing. The thing that gave you goosebumps, that kept you up at night. No one knew about it.

Except for your family and Hotch. Probably Garcia, too. He had your file and she probably had done a background search on you when you entered the BAU. They kept it a secret. And you were so grateful for that.

But the next case would be in Baltimore. And last time you were able to fool everyone and say you were getting nightmares because of the case. But this time, you were going to share a room with Luke. And you were super nervous.

He was your best friend. He would support you if you told him.

But would he? Or would he start to treat you differently?

Best case scenario, he’d start to look at you with pity every case and start treating you like you were made of glass.

You didn’t want that.

And the nervousness didn’t get better when you two entered the room and saw that there was only one bed.

You wouldn’t be comfortable. You knew it. You weren’t comfortable being in Baltimore and you weren’t comfortable sleeping in a bed with someone else. You definitely wouldn’t be comfortable doing both at the same time.

But you decided to do it anyway. If you didn’t you were sure you’d have to explain. If you did, there was a slight chance you wouldn’t have nightmares. Or that you’d stay still having them. It had happened before.

But you’d never divided a bed with a man in Baltimore ever since the worst day of your life.

You had never.

And you would now.

You sighed and asked yourself why had everyone left you alone to sleep with a man.

They don’t know you’re still traumatized, you idiot.

You’d passed your psychological exams. You were cleared. Not even Hotch knew you still had nightmares about it.

“Are you okay?” a voice took you out of your thoughts.

“Yeah, Luke. I’m just a bit tired.”

It’s not like you were afraid of Luke, or something like that. You trusted Luke completely. He’d never do something like that.

You didn’t trust yourself. You didn’t trust yourself to be quiet, to have a peaceful night, to even fall asleep.

“You can take a shower first” Luke offered, taking off his shoes.

“Thank you, Luke” you answered, taking your bag to the bathroom with you.

You quickly locked the door and stripped. You analyzed your naked body. There were no scars. Nothing that could remember you of that day.

Only your mind.

For a moment, you asked yourself if that happened at all. Were you delusional? Were you creating traumatic events? No, you quickly thought. You could remember the feeling of the handcuffs on your wrists too well not to be real.

You slowly sighed. You felt dirty. You entered the shower and turned the water on, after taking your soap inside it.

You scrubbed, scrubbed, scrubbed, but it seemed like the dirtiness would never get off you. After a while, you just gave up. You shouldn’t be a burden, making Luke wait that much.

You got out of the shower, dried off,  and put on some comfortable clothes. Sweatpants and a long-sleeved shirt, so you wouldn’t feel triggered for being exposed. Even more.

“I can sleep in the couch, if you’d like” you had told him when you first discovered you’d sleep together. Well, not together. In the same bed.

“Nah, it’s okay” he’d answered. “I mean, if you’re okay with it. I can sleep on the couch if you’re not.”

You’d said he could sleep in the bed with you. Why had you done that? Oh, your idiot need to please everybody, make everybody feel comfortable.

And now there you were, lying down in a bed. You started thinking of anything, anything that wasn’t your past, while Luke was in the shower. You needed to sleep. Since you were tired, it didn’t take long. Your mind drifted off as you closed your eyes.

 You felt some pressure on your waist. A hand. It was trailing down. It touched your sweatpants. No, you couldn’t let whoever was that person do that. You couldn’t. You tried pushing the hand far from you, you tried, but it was stronger. You screamed, “no”. You couldn’t, you couldn’t, you couldn’t…

“(Y/n), (y/n), wake up!” you heard a distant voice.

You needed to hold on to that voice. It was going to pull you out of that nightmare, make it not real.

“Wake up, wake up!” the voice was louder now, it seemed like it was closer.

You suddenly opened your eyes, and you comprehended what you had just done.

You’d had a nightmare. About that day. And you had screamed. In front of Luke. Your coworker, your friend.

“I’m sorry” you apologized as you sat down.

You only realized the tears on your cheeks when Luke wiped them away.

“Do you want to talk about it?” he asked.

You didn’t know how to answer, you didn’t know how to feel. Did you want to vent for him? You didn’t know.

Maybe you should. You should explain to him that there was a reason behind that breakdown. You needed to explain yourself.

“Luke, I think I should tell you something…” you said, quietly.

“What is it, (y/n), please, so I can help you?” he asked.

“You can’t help me with that, Luke. I was…” you stopped. You could do this. “I was… I was…” your voice kept trembling, and your hands, shaking. “A man, he… I…” why couldn’t you do this? “Once, here in Baltimore, a man…” you were frustrated. Why didn’t you let yourself finish the sentence?

“A man raped you, is that it?” Luke asked, blatantly. You just nodded, tears falling. “Son of a bitch!” he exclaimed.

“He… He…” your voice was trembling again. You couldn’t let it. “He tied me up in a hotel bed, and…”

You were almost pulling your hair out. And then, suddenly, you just broke down. You hugged Luke, your face on his chest, wetting the T-shirt he was using.

“Shhh, it’s okay. It’s okay” he whispered, while you held on tighter and let it go, closing your eyes, drifting away from your thoughts again.

Luke watched you as you were asleep, still hugged with him. He wanted to hold onto you like this forever. He wanted to be there with you at all times, he wanted to protect you. But he knew he’d need to let you go. He didn’t want the events of that night to happen again.

He slowly lay you in bed, being careful not to wake you up. Then, he went to the room couch and got comfortable there. He fell asleep fast.

When you woke up the next day, you almost couldn’t figure out why you were so tired. Just after a few seconds wanting to close your eyes again, the events of the night appeared in your head. Luke was already up and dressed for work.

“Morning” he greeted, with his signature smirk.

“Morning” you smiled back, but got serious almost immediately. “Luke, about last night, I–”

“You don’t have to explain, or apologize” he relaxed you. “It’s not your fault, and it’s okay.”

“I was actually going to thank you” you told him, smiling.

“No need to thank either” he chuckled lightly.

You got your clothes and went to the bathroom to shower. After you were ready, you and Luke went down to have breakfast with the rest of the team. You all had solved the case quickly – thanks to loads of coffee – and could go back home in the afternoon.

You were sat down in a seat on the jet. There was an unoccupied seat in front of you, which was quickly taken by Luke.

“Hey” he said, with a little smile.

“Hey” you smiled back.

“I’m sorry about yesterday. You didn’t have to tell me anything. I’m just… I’m sorry” he apologized.

“Luke, don’t be sorry. Look, I didn’t tell you just because that happened and I felt like I needed too” you explained yourself. “I told you because you are my best friend, and I trust you. If I didn’t, I’d just have created a lie. Seriously.”

“Really? You really consider me your best friend and told me that because you trust me?” he asked, his face lighting up.

You smiled at him.

“Of course, you silly!” you chuckled. “Luke, I love you.”

“I love you too.”