#my whole life is just tracing parallels between stuff I enjoy | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

fandomfan2000 · 4 years ago

Text

Song analysis #3 God of Loss

here's a link to the Song

this is fanart of @brightgoat‘s ask blog @askcupsandcasinos, a few of the photos I drew were HEAVILY inspired by some of the stuff Bright's drawn so please check out the original blog.

I think this Lyric\song title relates to Mugman because of his whole ‘spade’ aesthetic, as we know, according to Brightgoat and king Dice, spades are often associated with death and loss. The whole ‘God” part of this title is more or less ironic, after Mugmans little break down when he and cups visited Quadratus, we now know that he’s still suffering from PTSD and is looking to achieve something more then a mere mortal should, which as Quadratus stated will only end in his demise. Making the title of “god of loss” a perfect fit for the mug.

more under cut

“My father was a carpenter My mother, she died young”

These lyrics essentially just talk about Elder Kettle. He was Mugman and Cupheads Parental figure. He may not have been a “carpenter” but I see that line as more saying that he was humble and a hard worker, instilling these qualities into Mugman & Cuphead (well more or less). “My Mother she died young” is rather self explanatory, even though Elder Kettle didn't die young, he did pass away when the boys were relatively young, which was equally crushing to Cups and Mugs as a guardian dyeing young, if not more because they had no one left.

“I’m the eldest of my brothers You’re the trouble in my blood Trouble in my blood”

this line also feels self explanatory but I’ll explain it any way.

Its basically just stating facts, Mugman is “technically older” then cuphead “by like, a minute or something”. Aaaand Cuphead is usually seen as the trouble maker f the 2 whos always getting them roped into trouble. Which I think Mugman, just judging by the way he treats Cuphead does believe that cuphead is trouble.

This also refers to how Mugs’ ancestors and his relation to him has and will cause nothing but trouble.

“I swore that I’d stay humble Like my father was before He built the home I live in Of sand and mud and smoke Sand and mud and smoke “

This line correlate’s to Elder Kettle having been a very simple and kind man and how the boys see him in a good light. It also serve as an ironic statement as we all know Mugmans main sin is pride.

I see this line as more about Elder Kettle and Mugs’ ancestors and their effect on them, how they helped shape and build Mugs into the person he is. It also seems like a reference to the Bible and how Adam, the first human, was created. In the Bible God made him by taking, I think it was dust I'm not sure though, from the ground and created man, which I think is close enough to “Sand & Mud & smoke” to have a correlation as all those things come from the earth. I figured a reference to the Bible was fitting considering the whole ‘heaven and Hell’ theme.

“Yes, we will leave here without a trace Take a new name and an old shape”

This line correlates to Mugmans fear of death...or more a fear of being forgotten and not accomplishing anything notable his life before passing. It also correlates to Elder Kettles death and how he just disappeared, everything and everyone related to him went missing after his death.

the picture I drew is a redraw of Elder Kettles grave from this post.

This line refers to the parallels between Cuphead & Mugman vs The legendary chalice and her mystery friend whos been hinted at a few times. How their personalities kind of line up, Cuphead & Chalice being the more outgoing risk takers and Mugman & mystery cup being the prideful scientist’s. Meaning Cups & Mugs are the “new names” but really thanks to their ancestors giving them their signature soul powers, are living in “old shapes’ so to speak. Did any of that make any sense??? anyway moving on

“I’ll be no outlaw, no renegade Just your faithful god of loss”

(Eheheh this is my favorite verse it fits so well >:D)

So this just refers to 3 of the main 4′s roles (Devil, King Dice, Mugman) and kinda, maybe, sorta Mug mans internal thoughts. King Dice is a well known and respected outlaw\criminal as we know, having been having been “outlawed across half the globe” if I'm remembering correctly. The Devils whole thing is that he’s a renegade, fighting against his fathers oppressive rule to create change... even if what he’s doing is ultimately pointless. Lastly Mugman. The line relating to him I've already touched on but again its and of more ironic if anything. Mug man is simply the “god of loss”.

“So meet me by the river On a boat-shaped piece of earth We press our bones together And the spider does its work With flakes of garlic And petals from a rose If it’s small enough to carry You and I can call it home You and I can call it home”

okokok theres a lot to cover here ahhhh...

“So meet me by the river” could hint at the river of souls running through purgatory, not particularly relevant but considering that's were the Chalice is, its an important setting in the story so that makes this line relevant.

“We press our bones together” could reference just the characters and how their dynamics help progress the story, haha that comparison is kind of a stretch though. “And the spider does its work” I think refers to the devil (you know how his head can shape shift into a spider and all-) and his family and how their busy in the background, doing things mugs doesn't really understand or know of yet, which have the possibility of negatively impacting the brothers.

“If it’s small enough to carry You and I can call it home”

this refers to how the mystical inkwell and indirectly the memories the brother carry of Elder Kettle, allow them to find ‘home’ anywhere as long as their with each other and have their basic necessities met. The inkwell is small & their memories require no space to take with them, along with the fact that if they could utilize the inkwell they could create a home, and whole worlds for themselves.

annnywayy that concludes song analysis #3 hope you enjoyed’

stay tuned for more~

#cuphead #mugman #casinocups #askcupsandcasinosfanart #askcupsandcasinos #fanart #kingdice #brightgoat #brightgoat fanart #cups #mugs #illistration #illistrator #Digital Illustration #art #artist #song analysis #god of loss #god of loss darlingside

2K notes · View notes

drabbles-mc · 4 years ago

Text

Starting Over

Juice Ortiz x F!Reader

Combining two Anonymous requests for this: reader is Jax's younger sister, and with Juicey boi. Stuck fiercely with him through Potter. Douchebag! Anyway, so. It's just after Tara, and Juice has gone MIA. As soon as reader hears Jax wants Juice, she goes to find him - obviously get's pointed to him by Wendy (not Gem because she knows what she'll do). When she goes to Juice, he tries to scare her off, but she gives him some lip, then maybe some smut - then she takes him far away, never to return! & can I get a Juice x Female reader where she finds out that Jax wants Juice after he goes MIA, and she's been with Juice for ages without the boys knowing - and she realises that Juice is in danger, so she manages to find out where he is, and she goes there, has some fluffy/angst time with Juice, before pulling him into her car and driving off to take him away and completely leave Charming and the sons behind. Maybe a fluffy pregnancy reveal too? Ultimately, must save Juice and protecc

Warnings: language, angst, slight steam

Word Count: 2.3k

A/N: Figured that these two requests ran pretty parallel to each other so I combined them! Only thing I didn’t do was full-on smut because it didn’t really fit with the whole mood of everything. But we gettin’ Juice outta his mess for sure. Enjoy! xo

SOA Taglist: @garbinge @masterlistforimagines @mayans-sauce @adela-topaz-caelon @i-just-read-stuff @chibsytelford @mijop @shadow-of-wonder @xladymacbethx @kkim120 @multiyfandomgirl40 @toni9 @unicornucopia-fuckers (If you want to be added to the taglist just let me know!)

Things had been falling apart for the club for a while. Growing up in the middle of it had exposed you to a lot, but even so this was the most chaotic it had been in your lifetime. You couldn’t blame it all on Jax, knowing that things started crumbling long before your brother took his seat at the head of the table. But there was a lot more frustration there between the two of you than there used to be.

That rising tension was the original reason that you never told Jax, or anyone in the club for that matter, that you had gotten involved with Juice. It had sort of just fallen together. There was something about him that you couldn’t pull yourself away from, no matter how far he seemed to spiral. His life was just as messy as yours, if not messier, which was another reason the two of you decided to keep things quiet—it was supposed to cut down on the mess.

However, once you noticed that Jax’s feelings about Juice took a turn, you got nervous. Ever since Tara was murdered, he was on a warpath. You couldn’t necessarily blame him, but Juice was on thin ice as it was and you weren’t going to let him become another casualty if you could help it. You didn’t lose him in the depths of things with Potter, you weren’t going to lose him now.

You had looked everywhere for him. You scoured all of Charming but he was nowhere to be found. You stopped by his place, and immediately noticed that certain things were missing. His place wasn’t cleaned out, but you could tell that he packed the essentials to make a quick getaway. Your heart sunk inside your chest as you tried to strategize how to find out where he was. There was a short list of people you felt like you could trust to ask who wouldn’t blow up your spot to the rest of the club.

You found yourself on Gemma’s doorstep. For as much as you loved your mother, she was the last person that you wanted to talk to about this. You did, however, know that she and Wendy were close these days, and that anything Gemma knew about Juice, she might’ve pipelined to Wendy. It was a long-shot but she was the only person you had left that you felt like you could talk to without exposing yourself, or Juice.

Gemma opened the door, “Hey, sweetheart, everything alright?” she hugged you once you stepped inside.

You nodded, “Yea, all good. I just, uh, is Wendy here?”

You could see the gears turning in Gemma’s mind, “Yea, why?”

You shook your head, “Nothin’ I just wanted to talk to her about some counseling stuff,” you tried to play it off, “One of Lyla’s girls is a little,” you shook your hand slightly, “Rocky right now. Just wanted to get her opinion on some stuff. That’s all.”

You’d gotten good at lying to Gemma—it was the only way to have any semblance of privacy. She nodded, convinced for the time being, “She’s in the guest room with the boys. Send them out before you start talking about that shit though, alright?”

You nodded, “Of course.”

You made your way back to the room, politely sending your nephews on their way before shutting the door, allowing you and Wendy your privacy. Confusion was written all over her face as you sat on the bed with her. You took a deep breath as you tried to get your thoughts together, praying that this wouldn’t backfire on you.

“You know where Juice is?” there was no point in beating around the bush.

“Why would I know that?” she couldn’t meet your eyes, and you knew that she was trying to hide something.

“I know the club wants him dead,” you paused, correcting yourself, “I know Jax wants him dead. I just…I just wanna help him.”

“You wanna help Juice?” she clearly didn’t buy it.

You ran your hands down your face, not able to fault her for being skeptical, “Jax might be my brother but that doesn’t mean that I blindly support everything he does. I’m not my mother,” you shook your head, “Juice can’t survive this on his own. He needs someone.”

“You?”

You took a deep breath, knowing you’d already put yourself in a pretty deep hole. What was the harm in digging yourself a little deeper? You met Wendy’s eyes, “I’ve been with Juice for a while now. Way before all this other shit started. I can’t…I can’t let Jax get to him.”

Wendy pressed her lips together into a thin line. She knew as well as anyone what your family was like. It was a wonder that you turned out the way you did. She took a deep breath and pinched the bridge of her nose, “He’s at my place. That’s…that’s why I’m still here.”

You raised your eyebrows in surprise, “Y-your place?”

She nodded, “Gemma was banking on me staying in rehab way longer. Figured it was a free, empty place for him to stay. I wasn’t gonna kick him to the streets when the club wants his head on a goddamn stake. So…he’s still there.”

You leaned in a hugged her, for the first time in a long time. It felt a little foreign at first but she leaned into you for a moment and accepted it. You pulled away, trying to fight back the tears that were stinging at the edges of your eyes, “Thank you. Seriously.”

She nodded, “Don’t mention it. Seriously.”

You both got a quiet laugh out of that. Taking a deep breath to steady yourself, you stood up. Before opening the door, you turned back to Wendy, “If Gemma asks, I asked you about some rehab counseling shit for one of Lyla’s girls.”

She nodded, “Got it,” there was a brief pause, “Take care of him. He needs it.”

You nodded but didn’t say anything more as you left the room. You made your way back through the house, giving your nephews hugs and kisses goodbye before saying goodbye to Gemma as well. You tried not to let your anxiety shine through as you tried to put together some semblance of a plan.

You raced back to your place and packed a few bags. You grabbed the few things that Juice had left at your apartment over the last few months, not wanting to leave any trace of that behind once you were gone. You packed the essentials, grabbed your emergency stash of cash, and then hit the road to get to Wendy’s place.

You knocked relentlessly on the door. When there was no answer, you finally spoke up, “It’s me, Juice.”

Seconds later Juice opened the door, gun in his hand by his side. You could see it written all over his face that he was spinning out. You took a deep breath as you stepped into the apartment, shutting the door behind you. You immediately stepped in and wrapped him in a hug, your heart breaking at the way he practically fell into your embrace like you were the only thing keeping him tethered to the earth.

After a few moments, you pulled away from him. You could see it in his eyes how lost he was. You reached out, gently cupping his face, “We gotta go.”

“What?” he looked confused.

“We gotta go. We gotta get out of here. You can’t stay here.”

“Yea but…but you can’t go with me.”

It felt like a punch to the gut to hear him say it so definitively. “Why not?”

“Because you’re Jax Teller’s fucking sister,” he snapped, “You can’t just…leave Charming. You can’t just leave. Especially not with someone the club wants dead. They, they won’t stop until they find you. Or me.”

“They’re not going to find us.”

“You’re an escape artist now?”

You scoffed, “I don’t think that you’re in a position to be criticizing. It took me one day to find you.”

He gnawed at the inside of his lip, “You can’t do this. You’re going to get yourself killed.”

“That’s a risk that I’m willing to take.”

“Well I’m not,” he shook his head, “You’re not putting yourself out on the line like that for me. I won’t let you.”

“You won’t let me?” your laugh was hollow, “Let me? You don’t get to tell me what I can and can’t do. I grew up under Gemma’s fucking thumb—I’m done getting bossed around by other people. You don’t get to tell me that I can’t come with you.”

“Yes, Y/N, I do. You’re not throwing your whole life away for me.”

“I’m not throwing it away! I don’t want a life here in Charming if you’re not in it.”

“They will never forgive you for leaving.”

“Fuck ‘em.”

“Y/N,” he sounded angry but you could see the tears in his eyes. He turned away love every chance he could, not wanting to deal with the heartbreak that followed, “You can’t leave. Not with me. Not for me. I’m…I’m not worth the fallout.”

“Yes you are,” you stepped in and cupped his face once more, “You are worth whatever it takes. I love you.”

He closed his eyes, tears escaping down onto his cheeks, “I love you too.”

You pulled his lips to yours, catching them in a rough, needy kiss. He wrapped his arms tightly around you, like it was the last time he was ever going to be able to touch you. His tongue ran along the inside of your lip before meeting yours. You moaned, fingers pressing into the back of his neck. His hands slid underneath your shirt, nails raking lightly along the soft skin of your back.

You pulled away, breathless as you rested your forehead against his. He gave you a light squeeze, “I love you.”

You smiled despite the heaviness of the situation that you were in, “I love you too.”

“We can finish this when we get to wherever we’re going,” he chuckled, and it was nice to see him smile.

You nodded, pulling away from him a little bit, “Right, right,” you took a deep breath as you looked around Wendy’s place, “You got a bag packed?”

He turned and walked towards the closet, digging around before resurfacing with a duffle bag that was bursting at the seams. You looked at the kutte that was draped across the top of it and your heart broke. Leaving Samcro behind was going to be a big shift for the both of you—it was all you’d ever known, and it was all the family Juice had anymore.

He saw the look in your eyes and the tears returned to his. You shook your head slightly, “You gotta leave it, baby. Nothing good is gonna come from you keeping that.”

He nodded even though he didn’t want to admit it, “I know.”

He gripped the leather tight in his hand for a few moments before laying it on the end of Wendy’s couch. You nodded in approval, pulling him towards you and kissing him softly on the lips to let him know that it was going to be okay.

“You sure you wanna do this?” his voice wavered a little, “There’s…there’s no coming back from this.”

You nodded, “I’m sure,” you tangled your fingers with his, “Let’s go.”

The two of you packed what little you had into the trunk of your car. You situated yourself in the driver’s seat before turning to look at Juice. Worry was still present in his features but you could tell that even despite that, he was glad that you were there with him

You reached over, taking his hand in your own, “We're gonna be alright. We're going to figure all of this out. We'll be safe,” you paused, “Do you trust me?”

He nodded, no hesitation in his response, “With my life,” he paused for s few moments, “You’re really willing to leave behind your family for me?”

“You’re my family,” you waited for him to meet your eyes, “Juice?”

“Yea?” his eyes searched yours, trying to guess what you were going to say next.

“I mean it, you know. You’re my guy. My family.”

His smile as soft, sincere, “You’re my family too.”

“I know now might not be the best time,” you chuckled nervously, “But really when do we ever have a right time for anything, right?”

“What’s going on?”

“I’m…I’m not going to be your only family for much longer,” you couldn’t hold back your nervous laughter as you took his hand and rested it on your stomach, “A fresh start is going to be good for all of us.”

His eyes widened as he realized what you were telling him. A smile broke out across his face as he leaned over and kissed you hard on the lips. He’d never been more ready to run off with you than he was in that moment.

“Alright,” he chuckled, unable to believe the situation he was in, “let’s get the fuck out of here, then.”

You smiled, kissing him once more softly on the lips, “Let’s go.”

You threw the car in drive and pulled out onto the road. As you took off, Juice's hand came to rest on your thigh, “I love you.”

You smiled, glancing over at him for a moment, “I love you too.”

Your eyes made their way back to the road in front of you. Letting out a deep sigh, you let yourself soak up the fact that you were on your way to somewhere new, with the only person who really mattered, the only person who ever really tried to look out for you these days. Charming faded out of your rearview mirror and you had never felt more relieved, despite the uncertainty that laid ahead. All of the anxiety though., faded away when you felt Juice's thumb tracing back and forth on your leg. You had faith that the next chapter was really going to be the start of a whole new book, just for the three of you.

#soa #sons of anarchy #sons of anarchy imagine #soa imagine #juice ortiz #juice ortiz x reader #juice ortiz x you #juice ortiz imagine #juan carlos #juan carlos ortiz #my writing #fanfiction #drabblesmc

199 notes · View notes

artificialqueens · 3 years ago

Text

Two Minutes (Diamond Chaney) - Juno

Summary: Ellie misses Lawrence, but when they call to her in a dream, she knows where to find them.

A/N: This is kind of angsty, and featuring Time Lord Lawrence and companion Ellie. Hope you enjoy.

It had been ages since Ellie had slept properly.

She could still drift off into a vague doze, but sooner or later Lawrence's terrified face would appear in her mind, the last backward glance she'd had of them before Tia had dragged her through the last gap between the universes.

She'd always wondered if she and Lawrence would be separated. Lawrence had said that they probably would have to split eventually. After all, a human and the last of the Time Lords could only co-exist for so long.

What she'd never expected was for it to be permanent.

Eternal.

Binding on pain of blowing up both Earths if they tried to cross back over.

Since they’d all escaped to the parallel Earth, moved into this flat, every time Ellie heard a song on the radio singing about lovers being so far apart, she turned it off. Or lately, just wrenched the cord from the socket and stormed out of the room.

Try being whole fucking universes apart.

Tia always told her that she needed sleep, but Ellie would put her hands over her ears, shutting out the pity Tia couldn't keep out of her voice.

Ellie didn't want pity.

She wanted Lawrence.

——

It replayed in her head, like some torturous episode of some crap drama series that Veronica watched on daytime telly, box of Quality Street in one hand and tissues in the other, dabbing her eyes while insisting she wasn't crying.

Ellie had cried enough.

She couldn't picture much of it vividly, but she remembered the pull of the void, hundreds - thousands - of Daleks being pulled into it, while she and Lawrence were hanging on for dear life to the clips on the walls.

Until the lever had jammed and Ellie was the only one who could reach it -

Until she'd slammed it forwards and felt the irresistible suction of the void lift her off her feet with a cry of surprise, this time ever closer to going in, screwing her eyes shut and gripping the handle of the lever -

Until Lawrence called her name and her concentration slipped along with her fingers, and for one horrifying moment, the whole world moved in slow motion, the icy fear paralysed her; she was being dragged into the void and there was nothing she could do -

She was caught, seized tightly, and she thought that some silent prayer she hadn't said had been answered, but her angel was Tia, of course. Tia, who had worked out the device to get to her, and zapped them both away through the break in the universes to the parallel Earth, escaping the suction of the void the Daleks had gone to.

That was the last time she’d seen Lawrence.

She wished she could have remembered all the best times they’d had. The fun, the laughter - the saving the universe - the warm days and the cosy nights. Instead all she could think of was that expression of terror that Lawrence wore the moment it dawned on them that Ellie was slipping away.

——

“Ellie. Ellie! Els!”

Lawrence’s voice woke her up from the dream, twisted in the sheets, as she realised that this time she must have gone to sleep. Coaxed into a dream by the star light that Bimini had bought, mesmerised by the patterns they traced along the ceiling, she remembered her eyes suddenly growing heavier and her thoughts fading away, from a buzz busier than a hive to a blank canvas.

But the light had turned itself off. And she knew it was Lawrence’s voice; she’d know that accent anywhere.

“Ellie …?”

The dream was still with her, she realised, so vivid she could almost see it before her waking eyes - and the pin on her google maps, she knew exactly where on the map of England it was - and the image of the dull ochre of the beach and the brilliant, shining grey-blue of the sea -

She didn’t hesitate.

It took just twenty minutes for all four of them all to pile into the car. Veronica adjusting her glasses in the drivers’ seat. Bimini in the passenger seat, pressing all the buttons, trying to find the radio station. Tia in the back seat, clutching her rucksack to her chest with one hand, and Ellie’s hand in her other, rubbing it tenderly.

But Ellie barely felt it. All she could see was the dream, and the exact pinpoint of the beach on her google maps on her phone, and the picture of the beach on the app that looked exactly like the one she’d just dreamt about.

Where Lawrence was waiting.

The drive to Plymouth was far too long, and somehow they drove past the car park and onto the sand itself, but Ellie stumbled out of the car, running to the spot she’d seen. It was raining - typical - drizzle that clung to the air and hung in tiny particles to the skin, and the sky overhead was covered in clouds.

And in the fading afternoon light, they appeared in a shimmer, fading out and then in again.

“Lawrence!”

Ellie’s shriek was elated, rushing to the spot Lawrence was trying to emerge into. They were speaking, becoming real instead of haze, and Ellie caught a few words as their image settled into a solid form.

“… broke it.”

Ellie perked an eyebrow. “You broke what?”

“The star, the one I found. I broke it.”

“What star?”

Lawrence rolled their eyes. “Didn’t Tia explain to you what had happened?”

“I mean,” Ellie twitched her shoulders, licking the salt from her lips. Tia had explained everything, soon after she’d turned up to save Ellie from certain Dalek doomsday, but Ellie admittedly hadn’t really listened, partly uninterested, partly desperate to get back through the break in the universes, back to Lawrence.

“Yeah, yeah she did.” Ellie nodded.

Lawrence grinned. “Don’t tell me. In one ear, out the other, right?”

“Shut it, hen.”

But Ellie’s voice broke at the last word. The lump in her throat grew, prickly and swollen with everything she hadn’t been able to say these few weeks, everything she’d swallowed down had lodged itself there.

“In simplest terms, I’m at a supernova. In the TARDIS. Projecting this image of me through the gap between the universes. It’s - it’s the last bit left to close, and it’s taking all this energy from this star burning up to keep it open.”

Lawrence took a shaky breath. “I’m - burning a star in a parallel universe to see you, Lanky Legs.”

Ellie could feel her heart swell, could feel her feet leave the ground.

“Can you come back?”

But Lawrence just smiled sadly.

And Ellie had known it was hopeless. She knew it with her head, but her heart still hoped it could burn brighter than the supernova, sear a hole through the universe that separated them.

“How - how long have we got?”

“About two minutes.”

“Two minutes?” Ellie choked on the lump at her throat, her feet hitting the ground again and sinking into the sand. “What - how am I meant to - how can we get through everything - what do you mean, two minutes?”

“Probably more like one-and-a-half now,” Lawrence murmured.

“What - how am I meant to - there’s so much I want to tell you -“

“So tell me.”

Ellie opened her mouth -

And her mind went blank again.

She laughed, a nervous sound through the tears that started to fall.

“I don’t know what to say!”

That was a lie and they both knew it.

“I see you’re not alone,” Lawrence waved at the others, standing next to Tia’s third-hand Fiesta, who waved back, knowing not to interrupt but wanting to say their own hellos. And goodbyes.

“No. We all drove down here -“

“I was gonna ask, where the fuck is this?”

The laugh escaped Ellie before she was prepared for it, and she spluttered. “It’s Plymouth.”

“Plymouth?” Lawrence blinked. “Did we ever come here when I was -“

“No, no we didn’t!”

Small talk, Ellie. Fucking small talk. Get to the point!

"Lawrence -"

But there was no time. No time at all.

She reached for Lawrence, but her hand went straight through her arm.

"I'm just a projection, that's all."

Lawrence's own voice was gravelly, as if they were recovering from a cold. Pained, sombre, aggrieved.

"What will you do?" Ellie heard herself say, an octave above her normal voice, her throat almost unbearably painful with words and tears.

"I've got the TARDIS, haven't I? Gonna do more fucking timey-wimey stuff. Maybe."

Ellie just nodded, gazed at Lawrence.

"On your own?"

But Lawrence just continued that sad smile, even as their chin quivered.

"Aye. On my own this time."

A whisper was all they could manage. A quiet sound that deafened Ellie with its sorrow.

Ellie wanted to hold them tightly, to squeeze that pain from their voice the way she used to, to kiss their forehead and to hear their hum of contentment. She wanted to pummel her fists into the sand below her at the frustration and shout at the horizon that the sea drew back to … she wanted the universe - no, the universes - to know that time and space had torn them from each other and that the fact they had no time, no time left to do this was an abhorrent injustice …

"Lawrence …"

And she realised that what she wanted to say, what she had to say to Lawrence, was so enormous that her mind had assumed, stupidly, that it would take a lot of time, so much time that it would be too much for this small window of opportunity …

"Els?"

… when in reality it was the sheer size of her heart was taking up room, but it could be condensed, summed up in three meagre little words that held such limited significance -

“I - I love you!”

And Ellie crumbled to the sand, weightless as she saw Lawrence's green eyes flicker, their lip tremble as they took it between their teeth, their face grow flushed with pink as they crumbled too, shaking with love and sadness and grief and anger and everything else that Ellie could see in them, because they mirrored her too.

… and everything about Lawrence before doomsday came flooding back to Ellie.

The way their eyes used to crinkle up with laughter. The way they had made the world around her sparkle with fun. The softness of their skin, their hair - their smile, their smile that burned brighter than the supernova that threatened to turn to embers at any moment now.

She knew this was why Lawrence was calling her in her dream.

This was it.

The chance to experience happier times again.

The chance to ease the grief with a balm of comfort, and love.

"Ellie."

Her own name was the most beautiful sound in the world in their mouth.

"... I love you."

A tear, just one, glistened in the fading afternoon light like a diamond on Lawrence's cheek.

Then they were gone.

——

The drive back to Nottingham was a blur.

Tia took the first leg, then Veronica. Bimini did the M25, the only one brave enough to tackle it.

No one asked Ellie to drive.

Her mind was blank, neither happy nor sad for a while, numbed by the salve that was having her peace with Lawrence one last time. By the time they all got back, Ellie was starting to feel calmer. They weren't in any imminent danger in this universe, at least - they were safe and sound.

After a while, she had enough energy to drive to Skegness - good ol' Skeggy as Tia called it fondly - to sit on the wall above the beach, dull, grey sand rising to meet the steel skyline of the sea as the sun set behind her, her back tingling with its rays.

Before long, it became a regular haunt. This spot on this wall became Ellie's Spot. She brought food, books, music, alcohol. But time continued, the tides always simply rose and fell, to make a mockery of Ellie's emotions by ignoring them and letting her lose herself in the memories the sea sparked.

She found she no longer needed the star light to sleep, but she still had it on now and again.

All while replaying in her mind every incredible thing about the glorious Time Lord who once burned up a fucking star to see her one more time.

#rpdr fanfiction #lawrence chaney #ellie diamond #ellie x lawrence #bimini bon boulash #tia kofi #veronica green #lesbian au #angst #sci fi au #uk2 #rpdr uk #juno

6 notes · View notes

donnieluvsthings · 4 years ago

Text

anyway i’m still thinkin about roceit newsies au...this got SO LONG its basically a bullet fic of the whole plot at this point but uh enjoy!!! its has all the sides and remy and emile bc i rly wanted to shove them all in here aldkaldka

this is based on the musical mostly bc i have never watched the original movie all the way thru oops

roman is jack and remus is crutchie (thanks boop). remus does crazy stunts even with his crutch and roman is Constantly Worried TM and overprotective of remus even tho remus can DEF take care of himself

on the other hand remus knows roman hates working as a newsboy and just wants to escape to some small town where he can become a local artist of some sort. remus wants roman to go CHASE his DREAMS even tho he’s afraid roman might leave him behind

roman may be the actor but remus is great at coming up with gruesome yet intriguing headlines that get people to buy papers and would totally be a great author of some sort

ON THAT NOTE roman dreams of santa fe and can picture it perfectly but whenever he tries to explain it, it comes out as senseless rambling and longing. it’s remus who can really put into words what roman feels (bc theyre bros and they just GET each other)

virgil as davey, patton as les, logan as sarah (its the musical but they have an extra sibling okay. let me have older brother logan)

virgil and patton show up and virgil is super untrusting and hates that theyre basically lying to get people to buy papers but patton is just EXCITED to meet New People!!! and looks up to roman (and remus), like, instantly

it helps that roman promises to take them to a real actual theater after they sell all their papers owned by the one the only emile picani !!!

also roman is the one who first calls him “virge” which is like jack saying “davey” instead of david. yes this is necessary information

so they sell their papers (and roman briefly meets an ESPECIALLY handsome guy wink wink) and go see emile who performs some variant of That’s Rich like the star he is. u cant take singer emile away from me

roman also performs bc i said so. he spies someone watching him during his act up above the stage and climbs up there when he’s done

janus. its janus, if that wasnt clear or u dont know the plot of the newsies musical aldkaldlal

so yeah janus as katherine!! he may be pulitzer’s son but that doesn’t mean his father wants him to be a journalist. pulitzer thinks he should prepare to inherit the publishing company or be a banker or smth, not be a journalist

i just think janus’ “society is a LIE” vibe fits with katherine. i mean, just look at Watch What Happens. “give life’s little guys some ink,” “they’ll storm the gates,” “rich greedy sourpusses” .... idk it just SCREAMS janus to me

ALSO, katherine technically lies about her identity for like 3/4 of the musical, so

anyway! roman meets janus and janus is all suave and lowkey flirty at first but then roman starts flirting BACK and jan is like “uh oh how to talk to cute boys????”

so then he gets all “i have more important things to do” *hair flip* and goes back to the article he’s supposed to be writing about emile’s theater (a lot of his notes are about roman’s performance but nobody needs to know that shhh)

roman draws a portrait of jan and leaves it there and janus gently & dramatically picks it up, stares at it, and tucks it into his suit with a soft smile

uh oh prices for papers went up! virgil steps up and helps roman lead a strike. turns out his caution works GREAT with roman’s determination and they keep each other from going towards extreme overthinking (virgil) or extreme stupidity (roman). they are a TEAM and they are BESTIES.

remus: lets SET THE PAPERS ON FIRE

roman, starry eyed: HECK YEAH LETS DO IT

virgil: how about we dont do that and instead form a union

and then the twins are like GOOD IDEA and tell everyone else. virgil may be a cautious and untrusting and afraid of public speaking but he has good ideas dangit

the intro to seize the day yknow? virgil says a Good Idea (which can probably be traced back to him always listening to logan rant about his studies) and roman spreads the message in a Firm Rebellion-y way to the other newsies

and patton is there doing his absolute best. he may be small but he knows that this isn’t right or fair to the newsboys and he’s ready to physically fight someone

enter logan who is lowkey really proud of virgil for stepping outside of his comfort zone to do whats right. logan may be scared out of his mind for his little bros but he’s gonna help them as much as he can between college and trying to work side jobs to help their fam

basically logan knows janus and tells him that he should report on the strike bc logan wants to help his bros AND his friend however he can

cue janus seeing his opportunity and TAKING it. he’s gonna write about this strike even if no one else will!!! take THAT, father

he also maybe possibly wanted to see roman again. but roman never needs to know that okay what he doesnt know cant hurt him

seize the day happens!!!! they strike!!!! they r powerful!!! but then no one else from any other sections of new york strike with them and they lowkey get rekt

remus mocks the delanceys but that was a BAD decision cuz now theyre targeting him and he gets taken to the REFUGE

roman is SAD bc his brother’s been taken away, no one showed up to help them strike, his brother’s been taken away and he just wants to get OUT of there. run away to santa fe, his ideal world, but he can’t even articulate that because his brother is gone

how is that just act one. how have i written so much yet left out so much???

remus is at the refuge and he’s a little more scared, now, that roman really will just leave him behind even though he knows deep down that roman would never.

still. he writes roman a letter and maybe he goes into a little too much detail about his injuries and the refuge but hey, that’s remus. he writes about how maybe they can run away to santa fe together. he signs it “your brother” and i CRY because they are the best bros

roman reads it and ALSO cries. especially because there it is, the description of santa fe he can never come up with by himself. remus rly does know him, huh

total scene change: janus finds the other newsies (and logan) in a restaurant? bar? and is like “!!! ur on the FRONT PAGE on my newspaper” which i just decided is called the snake instead of the sun

virgil didn’t totally trust janus would follow thru at first but now he’s convinced. they did it!!!! theyre on the front page!!!! the world WILL know!!!!

cue tapdancing!!!!!! king of new york is an absolute bop. i need logan tapdancing daintily and then janus LAUNCHING into some complex tap routine bc the newsies think he too will dance daintily

i know they wouldnt,,, actually dance but just let me have this self-indulgence in this entirely self-indulgent au

the Bro Trio + janus go hunt down roman to show him the paper and find him painting stuff at emile’s all sad and upset bc, well, they lost and remus was taken

but virgil is trying to show him that they made progress!!! sure pulitzer won but he won the BATTLE and actually the poor guy’s head is spinning bc theyre gonna win.

“cmon, ro, if i’m is telling you to be optimistic there must be hope”

see virgil calls him RO and its cute bc roman gave him the nickname ‘virge’ and now virgil’s giving him the nickname ‘ro’ theyre just besties okay

roman is unconvinced but then logan, who roman has actually never met before, steps in with Facts and Statistics, and patton adds some adorable words of encouragement, and janus sassily waves their Front Page Story at him, and roman starts realizing they DO have a chance

but then uh oh pulitzer threatens remus and the Bro Trio and roman is forced to speak out against the strike or risk ruining the lives of everyone he loves. and also he finds out that janus is pulitzer’s son and is Betrayed TM

theres some “he’s just trying to build up a false confidence in u so u can plummet to even greater depths” parallels in there somewhere....u can’t trust many people as a newsie and when roman DOES trust someone turns out he’s the son of the guy ur trying to fight

so roman says overnight in pulitzer’s basement, sleeping on an uncomfortable old printing press, and makes his decision

now for the RALLY

remy is spot conlon bc he DESERVES to be the leader of the brooklyn newsies. brooklyn, flushing, richmond, etc all show up to a newsies rally and are like YEAH!!! STRIKE!!!!

virgil is trying to tame the crowd nervously and keeps waiting for roman to show up bc they work best when theyre working together!!!! finally roman’s there and virgil introduces him (the attention isnt solely on him now thank gosh)

but then roman starts talking about how they dont stand a chance and how they shouldnt go on strike and virgil is just. confused and upset and angry

especially when he sees one of pulitzer’s employees slipping roman wads of money

virgil corners roman afterwards and is absolutely RIPPING into him. roman could fix this if he would just tell virgil the truth, tell him he doesn’t care about the money, he just wanted to keep him and patton and logan safe—

but roman knows if he tells virgil, then virgil will turn all his anger towards pulitzer, will be able to convince roman to keep going, and roman won’t. he can’t put virgil, put his family, at risk.

so he lies.

he doesn’t mean any of it. but he says it.

and maybe he kind of understands why janus lied, too.

he says he’s never had anyone to take care of him or remus, not like virgil does with his parents and his older brother. he says virgil will never know what it’s like.

virgil scoffs and glares and beneath all his fury looks crushed. but there’s still fire in his eyes, a spark roman saw that first day that only grew and engulfed any doubts virgil ever had.

roman says he’ll take the money and go, leave new york behind.

virgil says fine. we don’t need you. because you know what? all those words you said were mine. i didn’t have the courage to say them back then but now i do. we don’t need you.

(because i watched that scene in the movie and like YES go OFF davey i mean virgil)

roman flees to his “bedroom” which is really just a fire escape and just longs for remus’ reassurance. he has the letter but it doesn’t seem as encouraging now, not when he’s lost everything else important to him.

then janus shows up and roman’s mad at him but not mad enough to kick him out. and janus watched roman just give up on everything they’ve been fighting for and just wants to know WHY. why did he turn his back on the newsies when they were so close?

and roman, tired and upset and defeated, just says they wouldn’t succeed. even if all the newsies went on strike no one would report on it, anyway, because pultizer has all the printing presses on lockdown, even the one janus published from. and they already lost once! what more could they possibly do?

roman looks out over the railing, chest heaving from his rant, longing for his imaginary santa fe where he doesn’t have to face his failures. janus stands next to him and puts his hand over roman’s.

“i don’t have a simple answer to that question....but here’s a start.”

and janus pulls out a paper with roman’s words (well, and virgil’s, because virgil said it first but roman rephrased it powerfully, and that’s why they worked as a team) typed out, words that make the strike not about newsies but about ALL working children in the city who are being exploited for their youth and naivety.

it’s an entire article, expertly written. if published it would get the word out to the other newsies that they haven’t given up and show other working children and adults alike that this is IMPORTANT and they aren’t going away.

and then roman remembers his drawings of the refuge and remus’ graphic descriptions and shows them to janus and hey!!! they have a plan!!! they just need to print it....

roman’s like yo there’s an old press in ur dad’s basement he’d never suspect anything

and theyre both so excited and theyre gonna DO this, FINALLY, and janus sees hope on roman’s face again, maybe permanently this time, and janus just leans in and kisses him.

its very sweet and cute and theyre in LOVE

they pull back and kinda stand there awkwardly for a few seconds before both of them start grinning

and they both know its fragile, that they’ve hurt each other and trust was cracked, but it wasn’t broken completely, and they can fix this. they believe in each other and that’s enough for now.

and then they go find virgil at his house

roman knocks on the door and virgil opens it and just. glares at roman. and roman starts rambling apologies and explanations and tries to tell virgil about their plan and did he mention he’s sorry

virgil kinda just stares at him as he goes on and on and the only thing that stops him is patton running out and launching himself at roman

then logan appears behind virgil, and virgil kinda just smiles

“glad to have u back. again.”

and then they go sneak into pulitzer’s basement and print the article with jan’s writing and ro’s drawings and remus’ descriptions and the other newsies go spread the papers ALL around the city

the next morning EVERYONE is out on strike!!! u cant get ANYWHERE without seeing ppl, newsies or otherwise, filling the streets with chants of “seize the day”

roman, with the Bro Trio and Janus trailing close behind, waltzs on in to pulitzer’s office and flings the money pulitzer gave him back on the desk and is like whatcha gonna do NOW, joe??

pulitzer angrily tells them he’s a fool for going back on their deal and logan steps in sayin pulitzer is a fool for letting this get so out of hand over a 10 cent price increase. his sales are down 70%!! objectively the price increase was like the worst business decision ever

virgil’s like plus it’s making u look bad that ur business is the reason most of these kids are suffering. people really love kids, mr pulitzer and patton smiles brightly but in like a menacing way

then emile walks in with a ~dazzling smile~ and is like ur son told me about this whole situation, it’d be a shame if i contacted my good friend governor roosevelt who won’t be as kind as these brave newsies since u tried so hard to stop him from being elected :)

((in the show roosevelt is actually there but i want emile to have a moment to SHINE))

so pulitzer’s like FINE and talks to roman alone and roman wears him down, throwing words from janus, virgil, and pulitzer himself right in pulitzer’s face until FINALLY they have a deal. he’ll lower the prices by half AND pulitzer will buy back whatever they don’t sell full price

roman bursts out of the office into the streets where all the newsies are waiting and is like WE WONNN

and since they published all that stuff about the refuge in the paper, the guy who runs it is being arrested and REMUS IS FREE

the twins hug for like a full two minutes

then pulitzer offers roman a job as a political cartoonist and roman’s like. well idk now that this is over i should probably...head out

bc lowkey he’s thinking virgil still doesn’t wanna see roman ever again and he did say he would leave, so

but then virgil’s like come on, ro, you don’t really think we want u to leave, do u? what’s santa fe got that new york aint? tarantulas? sandstorms? stampedes? you can’t go to santa fe what if you DIE—

and logan says new york’s got us!

patton: and we’re family, right?

then janus is like you got a union to lead! and...you got me.

and remus is like bro, anyone can dream, all you do is close ur eyes! but some made up world is all you’ll ever see. (bc he’s the wordsy one, u see. he helps roman have the poetic realization that his santa fe isn’t real, but this IS)

so roman says well if u guys INSIST.....and then he takes jan’s hand and kinda asks w his eyes and then kisses jan in front of all the newsies who proceed to cheer obnoxiously

when they break apart roman leads janus by the hand over to the paper-buying-cart and slaps some couns down on the table and BUYS SOME PAPERS BC THEYRE NEWSIES BABEY

and everyone lived happily ever after🥰

#sanders sides #roceit #creativitwins #newsies #sanders sides fic #sanders sides fanfic #bullet fic #repost bc tumblr glitched hardcore #uhh anyway the original tags i had were smth like #‘i rewatched newsies and i love it also i love jeremy jordan also stan newsies the musical’ aldkaldla #roceit newsies au #donnie writes

4 notes · View notes

verobatto · 6 years ago

Text

Destiel Chronicles

(Vol. XII)

It was a love story from the very beginning.

First date Illusion for a broken man

(5x03//5x10//5x11//5x13//5x14)

Hello Friends! I'm here again with another volume from my Destiel Chronicles.

In this meta I'm gonna trace a parallel between 5x03 "Free to be you and me" and 5x13 "My bloody Valentine."

I want to say thank you to my friend @agusvedder who made the gifs for this meta! You are amazing, girl!

Now, let's start this...

First hunting date

When Dean and Cas went on their first hunt together, it was like a first date, and as we saw in 5x03 "Free to be you and me", Dean really enjoyed being Castiel's partner and hunt with CAS.

Trying to teach him human's stuffs, giving him advices, and even going out to a brothel with him was so fun, that he admitted he was happy with him, as he wasn't in a long time.

Yes... Seeing Castiel having a bad time was funny too, he was discovering being around the angel was exquisitely entertained. He had tried made him mad, and locking him with pop culture, and now watching him so nervous was delicious.

That had been a great first date, he even tried to seduce him by flirting... But Cas was such a cute clueless angel...

But I'm a broken man

Coming back to 5x10 "Abandon all hope", Jo gets hurt bc she saved Dean from the hellhounds. And she dies later with her mother Hellen.

Dean let the guilt to consume him again, and we had, immediately after that episode, 5x11 "Sam interrupted", in which we saw Dr. Cartwright, as a construction/illusion, from Dean's mind to question himself about the mission, about his duties. The program he had in his head as THE BIG PROTECTOR and the FIRST BORN. The mission to protect everyone to any cost, even his life. He was questioning that because he felt Jo and Hellen had died for him. And that was too painful.

The first time Dr. Cartwright appeared, she asked Dean about his father, but the second time... He asked about the Mission Heritage.

DR. CARTWRIGHT: Why you?

DEAN: Why me, what?

DR. CARTWRIGHT: Why do you have to hunt monsters? Why not let someone else do it?

DEAN: (shrugs, smiles) Can't find anybody else that dumb. (thinks for a moment) It's my job. Somebody's gotta save people's asses, yours included.

Here is Dean asking himself why he has to do this. Why he has to hunt and keep saving people. And he answers himself. IT'S MY JOB. IT'S MY DUTY. BECAUSE I'M AN OBEDIENT SON. I'M A GOOD SON.

Then this...

DR. CARTWRIGHT: So, is there a quota? How many people do you have to save?

DEAN: All of them.

DR. CARTWRIGHT: All of them? You think you have to save everyone?

DEAN: Yep. Whole wide world of sports.

Dean has to save and protect anyone. So... Why he couldn't protect Jo and Hellen? That's the huge guilt that is now on his shoulders... But this didn't end there... When the Doctor asked how he would protect and save everyone, he said...

DEAN: It's the end of the world, okay? I mean, it's a damn Biblical apocalypse, and if I don't stop it and save everyone, then no one will, and we all die.

DR. CARTWRIGHT: That's horrible.

DEAN: Yeah, tell me about it.

DR. CARTWRIGHT: I mean, apocalypse or no apocalypse...monsters or no monsters, that's a crushing weight to have on your shoulders. To feel like six billion lives depend on you...God...how do you get up in the morning?

DEAN stares contemplatively for a moment.

DEAN: That's a good question.

How can Dean avoid all of this and wake up in the morning? He can't... He is carrying with it the whole journey... As we will see in the following scene.

Free will is an illusion

In episode 5x13 "The song remains the same", Dean talks with Michael!John, and that was one of the huge points that settled the Dean's despair that will lead him to say Yes to Michael and I will talking about that in the next volume, I just wanted to point here this phrase from the Archangel...

MICHAEL: You're my true vessel but not my only one.

DEAN: What is that supposed to mean?

MICHAEL: It's a bloodline.

DEAN: A bloodline?

MICHAEL: Stretching back to Cain and Abel. It's in your blood, your father's blood, your family's blood.

Michael is announcing everything is part of a plan, everything was constructed with a reason and with a destiny.

MICHAEL: You know, my brother, I practically raised him. I took care of him in a way most people could never understand, and I still love him. But I am going to kill him because it is right and I have to.

DEAN: Oh, because God says so?

MICHAEL: Yes. From the beginning, he knew this was how it was going to end.

DEAN: And you're just gonna do whatever God says.

MICHAEL: Yes, because I am a good son.

DEAN: Okay, well, trust me, pal. Take it from someone who knows—that is a dead-end street.

Michael is the good son, the obedient, as Dean is. This similitude is traced intentionally, and is one more proof that reveals everything was written to be like this. Even Mary and John were made for each other by design of God.

This lasts words from Michael will stay in Dean and will be part of the following events I will analyze in the next volume, will show us why he was about to quit to his free will.

Tryin to remember that first date when I was happy with you...

So, after these two things that happened to Dean, after questioning his duties, Famine arrives to the town on 5x14 "My bloody Valentine". And is Saint Valentine's day... But Dean was so broken and sad, that he didn't want to celebrate as always...

They start to investigate in the Morgue, and when they found enochian in one of the victims, they decided to call Castiel... And this classic Destiel scene happened...

Again he has this dorky angel in front of him, and is incredible he is doing that. But Dean and Cas are looking at each other's eyes again, with that intensity the hunter is use to by now... But is not less captivated.

And then, when CAS is explaining the boys about Cupid, Dean made a joke again...

DEAN: You mean the little flying fat kid in diapers?

CASTIEL: They're not incontinent.

SAM: Okay, anyway. So, what you're saying--

CASTIEL: What I'm saying is a Cupid has gone rogue and we have to stop him--before he kills again.

Castiel got a little anxious here, and Dean enjoys this. He enjoys this as he enjoyed putting him nervous that time in the brothel. He enjoys seeing Castiel mad too.

With all the things that happened to Dean, sad things, seeing Cas and... As we could see later on this episode, hunting alone with him, it reminds him that first date/hunt they had, when he was happy. When he enjoyed Castiel's company. So yes. Dean wasn't interested in food, in sex, in celebrating Valentine's day, he didn't feel Famine influence on him... The only thing/person that caught his attention was this dorky angel again. Because with him he had a good time. And now, admiring him and looking at him that way, checking him, he was trying to enjoy Castiel's company. (Even if people could say this was a cockles scene... The writers and the producers let the thing in the episode for one narrative reason.)

That's one deep, dark nothing Dean got there.

When Castiel realized Dean was the only one not having symptoms with Famine on town, he get curious.

CASTIEL: (...) What I don't understand is...where is your hunger, Dean?

DEAN: Huh?

CASTIEL: Well, slowly but surely, everyone in this town is falling prey to Famine, but so far, you seem unaffected.

But the truth was, the big hole Dean's had inside and Famine saw...

As I analyzed in my meta "Let's make a tour inside Dean's soul", that hole, that nothing, will be filled with love, family love and romantic love. But now, Dean is feeling empty, dead.

To conclude:

Jo and Hellen's deaths incremented the guilt inside Dean, he questioned his whole mission as the Big Protector.

The first date/hunt Dean and Cas had in 5x03, is a very nice memory for Dean, because he was happy and having a good time with CAS there.

In 5x14 "My bloody Valentine", the only thing/person Dean showed interest was Castiel, going to a hunt with him again and seeing him acting like the weird, dorky, little guy he is, should brought Dean good memories from their first hunt together.

The emptyness Dean have inside, pointed by Famine, is one another huge point for the following events, and later will be filled with Love.

I hope you like this!! C-u in the next volume!

Tagging @metafest @gneisscastiel @mrsaquaman187 @magnificent-winged-beast @emblue-sparks @weirddorkylittlediana @michyribeiro @castiellover20 @whyjm @koshisekisen @legendary-destiel @a-bit-of-influence @thatwitchydestielfan @misha-moose-dean-burger-lover @lykanyouko @evvvissticante @cheerstofandomfamily @drsilverfish @savannadarkbaby @angelneedshunter @trickster-archangel @dea-stiel @poorreputation @bre95611 @thewolfatmydoor @charlottemanchmal @neii3n @deathswaywardson @followyourenergy @dean-is-bi-till-i-die @hekatelilith-blog @avidbkwrm @anarchiana @mishka-the-angel-of-saturday @dickpuncher365 @vampyrosa @hippyatheart80 @xsghn @foxyroxe-art @authorsararayne @anonymoustitans @mybonsai1976 @love-neve-dies @wildligia @dustythewind @wayward-winchester67 @angelwithashotgunandtrenchcoat @trashblackrainbow @deeutdutdutdoh

If you want to be tagged in the Destiel Chronicles, please let me know.

Links to previous volumes: VIII / IX / X / XI

Buenos Aires May 23rd 2019 1:21 AM

#supernatural meta #destiel meta #destiel chronicles #vol. xii #season 5 meta

102 notes · View notes

imyourliquor-youremypoison · 5 years ago

Text

Big Spook (Peter Parker x Reader - Part 4)

Synopsis: Aged Up!Peter thinks he’s done well with leading a double life. He’s studying what he likes, he has his own place, he’s dating the girl he loves… but that doesn’t mean life is easy all the time. Even superheroes have bad days - and sometimes worse days.

Tags: Aged Up!Character, College AU, Established relationship, Whump, Angst. Does not take FFH into account. SPOILER FREE.

Word count: 1.9k

Part 3 <<< >>> Part 5

MASTERLIST

(Y/N) and Peter were good neighbors. They were quiet neighbors. They didn't listen to loud music into the early hours, they didn't get into shouting matches, they didn't bang pots and pans together at all hours of the day.

For the first time since they moved into their apartment, (Y/N) startled their neighbors. She had spent the entire trip back biting down on her lower lip until she drew blood and spacing out. She had climbed the stairs of their building without a word, and gently closed the door and locked it behind her once she was inside.

Then, she screamed. She screamed at the top of her lungs, covering her ears with her hands and squatting on the floor, curled up in a ball – she screamed. She screamed because it was the only way she knew to finally let out all the pain that built up inside her. All the rage and pent-up frustration. She was so useless! Peter spent his time saving the world and she was useless! She couldn't even save him when he needed her the most.

All she could do was make phone calls. She called to let everyone know of the situation and not to expect neither Peter nor her until he was better. She had called his boss to let him know what was going on, and he had been sorry to hear the news, he wished him the best and a soon recovery. And she had called her own boss, much less sympathetic than Peter's, and told him not to expect her because she was going to stay with him until he woke up.

He dared to tell her that it wasn't a family emergency, and (Y/N) had lost it. She had screamed in her phone, telling him that her fiancé was on the brink of death and that she would not set foot outside the hospital before she knew he was out of danger.

She didn't think about, she just said it. It was a white lie, one her boss couldn't question or verify. But May was there.

“I'm so happy for you two.”

Her words echoed in (Y/N)'s head, bouncing off the walls of her skull.

“I know he was waiting for the right time to ask you, I'm glad you said yes.”

Yes? Yes to what?

“Peter finally proposed.”

No, no he hadn't. May couldn't know he hadn't, and (Y/N) shouldn't know he wanted to. She would have rather not heard that at all. How much more tears could she cry? How long until she finally ran dry and could rest?

All she wanted was to rest... she wanted to go to their room, find Peter's sprawled on their bed,shirtless as usual, and lay her head on his chest, making him chuckle. She would close her eyes, and Peter, thinking she was asleep, would trace patterns on her naked shoulders, and whisper that he loved her.

(Y/N) wanted the hollowness in her chest to be gone. She wanted Peter to wake up so they could go back to their life. She wanted him to have a chance to propose for real.

When she found the strength to stand up, she thought their apartment had never looked so bleak, not even before they moved in and cleaned it. Everything was just like she had left it, except for one thing. She didn't need to check to know the blood was gone. Happy must have taken care of it first thing after Peter came out of surgery.

As expect, the bathroom looked pristine – even more than before. (Y/N) slowly stripped of her dirty sweats and threw them in the laundry basket. It was brimming with clothes, she would need to go to the laundry room so that Peter had something to wear when he would come back.

She didn't know how, but (Y/N) somehow ended up in the shower, and then in the kitchen, where she managed to cook a quick meal with whatever hadn't spoiled during her absence. She would also need to go grocery shopping, they would need eggs. She would make Peter scrambled eggs with bacon. It was his favorite breakfast.

Without really thinking about it, (Y/N) slipped into autopilot and did exactly what May asked her to do. She took care of herself, brushed her teeth after eating, washed the dishes, tidied up a bit because she couldn't stand disorder, and when she felt she was going to pass out, she huddled on the couch, refusing to sleep in their bed without Peter.

(Y/N) and Peter had moved into their place on the 1st of August a year and a half ago, and she remembered it like yesterday. Finding a decent apartment within one's price-range in New York city was as arduous as one would expect. Therefore, they didn't think too long about whether or not to sign the papers, they simply did.

The place was not decent in any way, and they would have to put some serious work into it if they wanted to live there. And that's what they had done. The first week, they still crashed at May's place, sleeping in Peter's narrow one-person bed. They didn't have anything, least of all money, because they poured everything into cleaning supplies and fresh paint. The placed needed it more than they needed a flat screen TV or a subway card. A makeover was required before they could even think about bringing in furniture.

For one week, they spent all of their free time there, sweating in the Summer heat, scrubbing this place clean of mold, and stains, and other things they didn't want to know the nature of. They repainted the whole place wearing old sweat shorts and a sports' bra for (Y/N) because it was too hot to wear anything more than that.

May had bought them a fan because she took pity on them, and Peter had draped a wet towel over it so it blew cold air. Every five minutes he caught (Y/N) standing in front of the device, arms wide open, letting out a contented sigh.

“Get to work, will you?” he had told her with a little smack on the ass, making her jump and yelp in surprise. Every day until nightfall, they worked together to make this place their new home, then they grabbed two beers and sat on the roof to enjoy some cool air.

Once the paint was dry, they started moving in. They still had nothing, but they made do. During their first night, they had slept on a mattress they got from a friend who just moved. May had given them old bed sheets she didn't use anymore. They had bought a fridge on Craig's list and hoped it would last until they could afford a brand new one. In the living room was a coffee table they found in the street, and it was surrounded by mismatched garden chair pillows so they had something to sit on with their friends when they had their house-warming party.

They had slept like babies and woken up with the morning sun since the blinds were broken and needed changing. The rays hit Peter's back, and (Y/N), who had woken up early, let her hand rest on his back muscles, feeling his warm, sun-kissed skin under her palm.

She remembered the process of making this their home; of slowly bringing life to this place, filling it up with their belonging and with memories. They had struggled at first – neither of them was particularly good at handiwork, but they had had to learn, and fast too.

There were three shelves on the wall across their bed, and (Y/N) still cringed at how much time it took them to put these into place.

“Stand back, will you?” she had asked Peter. She just measured – again – and drew line son the wall – again – and was now holding the shelves in place for Peter to see if they were horizontal.

If they fucked up once more, they would have to repaint that wall what with all the pencil marks they had drawn on it.

Peter stood on the bed and took his chin between his fingers, squinting his eyes as he evaluated their work. (Y/N)'s arms were tiring real quick.

“So?” she urged him. “Can we drill them in or what?”

Another moment passed.

“Well, at least they are parallel,” Peter concluded in a most unhelpful manner.

“For goodness's sake!” (Y/N) rolled her eyes. “Come here and hold these, I want to see for myself.”

They switched places and after determining that they were good, (Y/N) came back with the drilling machine and secured the shelves in place while Peter held them up – of course his arms didn't tire as quickly as hers from holding a few pieces of wood against a wall. With that done, they began to take their various belongings out of their boxes to set them on their new shelves.

“What's that?” Peter had asked, pointing at a wooden box sitting on the highest of them.

(Y/N) looked up from her laptop and over her glasses, following his finger.

“Oh, that just decoration. It's a birthday gift my dad brought from his trip to the Caribbean, you know how much I love handmade stuff,” she told him offhandedly.

“What's in it?”

“Nothing.” (Y/N) shrugged. “I just like having it here, it looks like a treasure chest.”

“You'd only put gold and gems inside?” Peter teased her, encircling her with his arms and sneakily taking away her laptop, kissing her to distract her from her work.

“Exactly,” (Y/N) laughed, unable to resist his neck kisses. “It's gonna stay empty for a while I think.”

Waking up with a start, sweat on her brow, (Y/N) shot up, panting. It was bright outside, what time was it? She had slept through half the day, most definitely. But she didn't lose time checking her phone, she stood up, nearly tripping over her own feet and burst into their bedroom, grabbing the little stool in the corner and using it to get her treasure chest.

When the little wooden chest was in her hands, she could already tell something was inside: it was slightly heavier than normal. She had never put anything in that chest, ever. She had a hard time swallowing, afraid that she was right. She knew she was right though, she simply knew.

That dream came out of nowhere but her subconscious must have sent it to her for a reason, and now she knew with absolute certainty what she would find inside. When she opened it, there it was.

The small velvet box.

She dropped it and her hand flew to her mouth, muffling a heart-wrenching sob. The wooden box clattered on the floor, closing itself. It was true. May had said the truth, Peter really meant to propose. He wanted to marry her, and now he was in a fucking coma! (Y/N) shook her head, refusing to let her thoughts wander on this slippery slope leading to self loathing. She fumbled in the dark and picked up the chest with the box inside, placing it back on its shelf without opening it. Whatever it contained, she would wait for Peter to give it to her. She owed him that.

Suddenly, her phone rang from the other room, the volume of the ringtone nearly sending her into cardiac arrest. It was the alarm clock she set. It was only ten after all.

With a sigh, she left the room, and locked herself in the bathroom to get ready. It was time to go see Peter again.

TAGLIST: @palindrome-teddy @complete-trash-101 @keeperofhopesanddreams @i-love-whumperflies @golden-guide @marauderette130 @lowkeykatie888

Comment if you wanna be tagged in part 5 :)

REBLOG TO SAVE A WRITER

18 notes · View notes

parttimehuman · 7 years ago

Text

Happy Birthday, Isak!

Isak was waken by the gentle stroking of his bare arm. Long, pale fingers were tracing invisible patterns on his cool skin, immediately making him feel warm and safe, even though he was still half asleep. He felt his boyfriend breathe warm air against his neck. Isak couldn´t remember how he´d ever been able to sleep without Even by his side, or half on top of him, to be exact. Even had incredibly long limbs, even in comparison to Isak, who wasn´t exactly short, either. Without meaning to, he always stretched his arms and legs out as soon as he was asleep, occupying almost the entire bed with his long body. At some point, Isak had gotten used to the random body parts resting on his. They reminded him that Even was there, right there, in the same bed where Isak used to toss and turn sleeplessly before Even had entered his life. Back then, something clearly had been missing to him, even though he hadn´t known what. It wasn´t until the first time he shared his bed with Even the night of their very first kiss, that he realised that this had been it. IT. How could he have been walking the same earth as Even for more than seventeen years, craving him a little more with every passing day, but not knowing? It seemed ridiculous now. There was only one person in all the existing parallel universes to complete him and it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Even went from caressing Isak´s arm to touching his chest. Isak shivered. This was one of the most sensitive parts of his body, especially to Even´s touch, and Even was perfectly aware of it. One half of Isak wanted to go back to sleep to get a couple of hours of recovery from the previous day before he´d have to get up for school in the morning, but the other half was slowly coming to the realization what was going on. It was not unusual for Even to become a little affectionate in the middle of the night when something was keeping him awake, but this was not one of those instances. It must be shortly after midnight. So it was Wednesday now. Wednesday, the 21st of June 2017. Isak´s 18th birthday. He should have known Even would stay up until midnight to properly wish him a happy birthday after he´d caught the man of his life texting secretly and hiding stuff in the kitchen cupboard and generally being pumped as fuck the whole week. There was probably a string quartet waiting outside of their bedroom. Isak couldn´t help but smile at that thought, letting Even see he was awake now.

Even´s heart started beating even faster when Isak turned his head towards him with a wide and endlessly beautiful smile on his delicate lips. Even after eight months with this boy, the sight of his face still caused Even´s emotions to blow up like fireworks, bright and loud and colourful into the dark sky of a Norwegian summer night. When Isak pressed himself into Even´s body and nuzzled their noses together, greeting Even in the language of eskimo kisses that he spoke better than all the eskimos in the northern polar region combined, Even forgot everything he had wanted to say to him, so he bumped his nose back into Isak´s gently while taking the boy´s face in his big hands. "Look at me, baby," he finally managed to say. Isak opened his eyes and Even was lost in green that he couldn´t actually see in the dark, but that was engraved in his brain permanently. "Well, I just forgot my line because of your dazzling beauty," Even admitted, which made Isak laugh and perk his eyebrows in expectation, "but I wish you the happiest of happy birthdays, mannen i mitt liv." Isak´s smile grew wider at that, exposing the adorable little gaps between his teeth. "I love you," Even added while caressing Isak´s cheeks with his thumbs. "I love you too," Isak whispered in return, "thank you, Even."

"You ready for your first kiss as an adult?", Even asked suggestively. This question didn´t require an actual answer, Isak decided. He was always ready to be kissed by Even. Every second of every minute of every hour ever since they´d met. So he simply brought their lips together, pulling Even closer by the smooth hair in his neck. He practically melted into the heat of Even´s mouth, trembling at the sensation of a strong but soft hand wandering down his spine. When Even pulled back, he groaned his complaint into the dark of the room. "Just one moment," Even laughed, before he suddenly lit a single candle in his hands. He held it in front of Isak´s face, so that Isak could see Even´s face and long neck and visible collarbones illuminated by the small flame. He stopped a minute to admire the view before him. It was fucking perfect.

"Make a wish," Even instructed. Isak took a deep breath in order to blow out the candle but then froze. He exhaled slowly through his nose and locked eyes with Even. "I don´t know what to wish for," he said calmly, leaving Even a little irritated, "I already have you." "Don´t be cheesy, baby," Even replied, "there´s always something you can wish for." "Is there?", Isak argued, "I didn´t really wish for anything on my last birthday," he started to explain, "but since then I´ve become friends with the boys, I´ve made up with Eva and I´ve found myself a true guru for life. I´m best buds with Sana now and I´m working on the thing with my parents, too. I´m not afraid to say that I´m gay anymore. I´ve learnt that Jonas will always have my back. I met you. I´ve fallen in love. I know what it means to truly live now, to be real. I´ve been having the best time in my life with you. I can sleep at night again, because I know that not matter how hard it may get, it´s all worth it. You´re worth it. Don´t you see, Even? I don´t need a wish, because there´s nothing about my life right now that I´d ever want to change."

"Shit, you literally just turned eighteen and you´re already being a total wise ass," Even joked and then turned a little more serious, "I know what you mean, though." He carefully placed the candle on the nightstand beside him and wrapped his arms around Isak to pull him close. He breathed Isak in. He couldn´t believe this boy was real. "You know, I, too, have been having the greatest time of my life since you came along. I always thought I was fated to be alone for the rest of my life. Well, not physically alone, but lonely, you know. With all those people around me but noone to truly get me. To understand who I am and who I´m not. Noone to ever know my dreams and encourage me to follow them. Noone to get me to feel something real." Even looked down at Isak, who was listening attentively while drawing circles on Even´s belly. He kept talking, because for some reason the words just kept flowing from his mouth. He considered it was time to pour his heart out entirely to Isak, who owned all of it anyways, who would forever own it. "I thought I was toxic to people, Isak. Especially to you, with everything that you had to go through before we even met. I was just a little too crazy to be understood or even loved. I was trying to accept the fact that I would never find the one thing I was craving with all the tiny broken pieces of my heart. The matching puzzle piece. I was lost. And I started to feel like I didn´t want to be found anymore. I didn´t want to let myself hope."

Isak swallowed hard. He hadn´t expected their conversation to take such a serious turn. It broke his heart to think about Even´s pain again. He´d been somewhat aware of Even´s struggles since he´d found out about his bipolar disorder. At least he had realised back then that Even wasn´t all that casual, light-hearted, lively and optimistic guy he´d first appeared to be. He placed little kisses all over Even´s cheek as a sort of comfort. Even felt like he had to object somehow. "What I´m trying to say is, I don´t feel like that anymore," he explained, "and that is thanks to you, baby." Isak smiled and exhaled some air against Even´s neck. "Seriously, Isak, I can´t put into words what you mean to me. How much you´ve changed my life. Like in a damn fucking movie you came to save me. I hope you know this is not some Princess-Vivian-shit-talking again. You´ve saved me. You´ve showed me what love means. You´ve showed me what it feels like to be loved. You´re the most wonderful person in this universe and in all the others. I love you. You´re so smart and funny and kind and beautiful and I love you. You´re the man of my life, because it wouldn´t be a real life without you."

Isak laughed out loud and leaned over Even to blow out the candle on the night stand. In the suddenly dark room, Even wanted to know, "have you changed your mind about that wish you said you didn´t need?" "I have," Isak replied, "I think I could use a less sappy boyfriend." "Nah," Even grunted, "you love your sappy boyfriend." "I love my sappy boyfriend," Isak confirmed, even though Even already knew. Everything Isak did or said was done or said with love. There wasn´t a doubt about it in Even´s mind.

-----------

If you want to read the whole thing (some smut following), please do so here: http://archiveofourown.org/works/11265081

Hope you enjoy :)

#happy birthday isak valtersen #isak valtersen #even bech næsheim #evak #skam #skam season 4 #fanfic

14 notes · View notes

massthetics-blog · 8 years ago

Text

New Post has been published on MASSthetics

New Post has been published on http://massthetics.net/golden-nutritional-rules/

8 Golden Rules Of The MASSthetics Kitchen

There are many different parallels intricately woven throughout life and lifting.

Sometimes mysteriously, sometimes not so much.

Granted, a large part of this may be thanks to our brain’s ability to rationalize, well, practically anything. Truthfully, I’m sure you could draw parallels and similarities between even the most obscure (such as peeling a basket of oranges and making a burrito).

But that doesn’t change the fact that there are marked similarities between much of the “things and stuff” in our world.

One thing that’s been hammered into my mind from studying business and marketing, is that “principles” are much more effective in the long run than “tactics” are.

For example: Since MASSthetics launched into the wild foray of the internet last year, I made it a principle to consistency produce excellent content twice per week for the blog (with the goal being to become a go-to resource, encourage regular readers, and help people get jacked, shredded, and tanned). Slow and steady, it’s working (just as principles do).

On the other hand, had I decided to focus on tactics (optimizing every article for Google, posting on every single social media platform, or resorting to eyebrow-raising titles to get people to read), I don’t believe that the growth of the site would have been as steady and upward-trending as it’s been.

And so it is with your nutrition.

Ketogenic diets, IIFYM, paleo, unicorn blood, carb cycling, intermittent fasting…these are bright and shiny tactics that while they certainly have their place, will have you hopping from one shiny object to the next without making any lasting progress.

This is where learning and developing principles around your nutrition will serve you for years and years, and will certainly never let you down.

Below are the 8 Golden Rules Of The MASSthetics Kitchen, and the very principles that I follow, and teach to my clients.

Once these principles become a part of your daily habits around food, not only will your results reflect it, but you’ll eliminate a ton of stress that often comes with trying to learn and fine-tune your nutrition.

#1. Use healthy, high quality fats for cooking (not cheap oils). Cook your food in olive oil/coconut oil/ghee/grass-fed butter.

Cooking with fat not only makes for an easier pan to clean and a tastier meal, but it’s also a simple way to integrate healthy fats into your nutrition on a consistent basis.

You can cook your eggs in coconut oil, veggies in ghee or fry up some potatoes in butter. Truly, the options are endless (and delicious).

I love Ghee. Ghee, ghee, ghee. Here it goes down, down into my belly. #ImRonBurgundy? #thethickening #fats

A photo posted by MASSthetics (@alexmullan13) on Jan 28, 2017 at 7:26pm PST

#2. Aim to buy the highest quality meat and produce you can (farmers markets).

Truth be told, it’s often cheaper to buy food that’s higher quality than what the grocery store offers. The being you have to know where to go, and buy in bulk when the opportunity presents itself.

Farmers Markets are a tremendous way to save money on veggies. If I bought all my veggies for the week at the grocery store I get dry goods from, it would probably run me around $50-60/week. Which is utterly ridiculous seeing as I can get the same amount of higher quality and much fresher veggies from a local market for about half the price.

The only downside with Farmers Markets is that they tend to disappear in the cooler months, and only happen once or twice a week (this is why you stock up each time).

#3. Eat primarily “clean foods.”

*cue joke about washing your food with dish soap before eating*

Sorry IIFYM’ers, but binging on pop tarts just because you can isn’t a strategy for long-term success. I’m not against having treats, processed food or straying from your otherwise sound nutritional principles on occasion. Honestly, chocolate covered gummy bears and espresso beans are two of my favourite things, and I would happily eat them every day.

But if were to do so, not only would I shortchange myself on micronutrients (yes, they are important), but I’d be starving all the time. Foods that taste like incredible like pop tarts (debatable) and chocolate covered candies will take a large chunk out of your food for the day, while leaving you far from satiated.

Leaning towards eating “clean, whole foods” will keep you much more satisfied, less prone to cravings, and moving the needle in the right direction.

#4. When you have a free meal or “cheat,” go out to eat.

Prep aside, once or twice a week I’ll have a meal where I eat whatever I may be feeling like. Usually it’s sushi, but it could also be a burger, fries and a shake, or a burrito and frozen yogurt (a surprisingly great combo).

The point of going out to eat (aside from experience and having something I may not usually make) is that I don’t have to buy a bunch of food that I probably wouldn’t use for a week. Which means no wasted food, or temptations from leftovers.

#5. Eat whole eggs.

All of the reasons you should be eating whole eggs:

Antioxidants

B vitamins

Vitamin A

Iron

Selenium

Biotin

Phosphorus

Choline

A million trace minerals

Cholesterol (which you need for building and repairing cells, among other things)

#yolkporn

They’re fucking delicious.

Eat whole eggs.

Grade AAA #yolkporn.

#6. If it upsets your stomach, don’t eat it.

Ah, one of my favourite principles.

If something upsets your stomach, don’t keep eating it (this is the only instance I’ll suggest eliminating a food from your diet). No matter how much you enjoy something, it’s not worth the hasty trips to the bathroom, bloating, general discomfort or knowledge of putting yourself into such discomfort.

Practice paying attention to how you feel after certain foods, understand your reaction, then adjust accordingly.

#7. Include veggies with each meal (lots of them).

The only caveat to this is that eating a ton of veggies prior to training may not be in your best interest (‘sup, fibre?).

Micronutrients and fibre aside, veggies will also help keep you feeling full in periods when you’re restricting calories, or are insatiably hungry.

#8. Use supplements to fill holes as needed.

For the purposes of general health and support your training sessions, I love supplements.

No, I’m not talking about fat burners, cheap protein or laced pre-workout (ah, those were the days).

I’m talking everything I detailed in this article on supplements for muscle building and general health.

The final reps.

In my humble (but accurate) opinion, its the pushing of all these nutritional tactics over the teaching of principles that creates much of the confusion for people surrounding their nutrition.

And that just ain’t right.

Yes, nutritional tactics are more “shiny,” attractive to most, and promise the world…but rarely do they deliver (especially over the long haul).

The key to long term success with your physique and your nutrition within learning and integrating nutritional principles into your life. Principles that you don’t stray from, no matter what shiny and bright tactic catches your eye.

PS. 4 out of 5 lifters will let their rationalization hamster run wild. Building no muscle, burning no fat. The 5th lifter joined the MASSthetics Clan and put the information within the (free) Hypertrophy Handbook to good use. Problem solved. Click here to become the 5th lifter, and let me know where to send the prestigious Hypertrophy Handbook.

#MASSthetics Quad Shot #Nutrition #Training Tips

0 notes