#my mom thought they were smth from like my grandparents but i REALLY didn’t think my grandparents would draw a ww refrence

[dolly-is-cool]

THEY MADE IT!!!!!!!!!! MY STICKERS FROM @potato-lord-but-not CAME IN!!!!! IVE BEEN WAITING :]

(if anyone is wondering why i ordered like three different gender identities and two kaynes it’s cause i was also ordering stickers for my cousin and @fryingthepanwithapplesauce)

[toastnbones]

❗🚪🏳️‍🌈🤔❓ for the pride asks!!

sure dude!!

❗️ ; When/how did you realize you were LGBT+?

It’s a bit hard to pinpoint the exact time I really started to think about it, probably around 11-12 years of age. my sexuality has changed a lot over the course of those years, I’ve identified as aromantic/ace/lesbian/bi and it was a long ass adventure figuring out who I was. I suppose I realized I like girls when I just kinda went 🥺 👉👈around them and felt barely any feelings around guys?

🚪 ; How out are you? Just online? To your friends? To your family?

I’m very much out online, I am out to some relatively close friends I used to have at school who don’t mind. In terms of family, I’m out to my mother, my sister and my cousin from my dad’s side. otherwise I’m not out to any of my grandparents or most of my dad’s side tbh.

🏳️‍🌈 ; Do you own any pride things? Flags, pins, etc?

no unfortunately I don’t bc I haven’t found the time to go out to exclusively shop for my own entertainment, and online shopping is iffy because I don’t have any online/digital cash so :/ plus I’m afraid of my dad finding it or smth

🤔 ; Did you have any childhood signs that you were LGBT+?

oh for sure. I mean yeah in my kindergarten years all I did was kiss random ass boys for that school yard clout B) but i was never introduced to romance back then and thought like, love could only be between a man and woman ( hence being raised in a catholic school ), but in grade 1 ( I was 7 ) I kissed this girl bc I was like lmfao it’s a friendship thing, I got in a shit ton of trouble. otherwise I didn’t really have common feminine interests, like you’d find me in the dirt pit collecting worms or picking caterpillars off of trees and holding them for the entire recess period. I was just, wack. my mom also thought I was gonna be a lesbian too lmao.

❓; When did you start questioning?

probably around 12-13 bc I got more into the online world and during my online time I dated one girl and one boy, after both didn’t work out I just figured I might’ve not been the romance person but tbh I just needed to find the right person? now I have a gf who I love to bits ❤️

[feisty-fae]

If you still do the flower ask thingys.. 👉👈 𝘼𝙡𝙡 𝙤𝙛 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙢 𝙜𝙤 :)

HoooH boY hEre we gO-

Alisons: Sexuality?

I sexually identify as a can of beans

Amaranth: Pronouns/Gender?

Cis female she/her

Amaryllis: Birthday?

27 September

Anemone: Favorite flower?

All flowers pretty,, but stargazer lily, rose, dahlia and cherry blossoms

Angelonia: Favorite t.v. show?

I don't watch tv but I'll list some other stuff i like to watch:mha, beastars and aggretsuko

Arum-Lily: What’s the farthest you’d go for a stranger?

Idk depends on scenario??

Aster: What’s one of your favorite quotes?

"Kanye West he likes, fingers in his ass."

Aubrieta: Favorite drink?

Any Milkshakes or smoothies (mostly banana and strawberry for milkshake and p much anything for smoothie)

Baby’s Breath: Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

I've never had kith

Balsam Fir: Have you ever been in love?

Well you see yes but actually no

Baneberries: Favorite song?

I listen to a lot but to keep it short:baby in the kitchen, in my mouth and friends slowed (chase atlantic)

Basket of Gold: Describe your family.

We p chill fam

Beebalm: Do you have a best friend? Who is it?

Irl bestie,, shes not on tumblr lol

Begonia: Favorite color?

PinKKK

But i like most colours

Bellflower: Favorite animal?

Cats,,,,

FoxES,

ANYTHING CUDDLY AND CUTE

Bergenia: Are you a morning or night person?

Night

Black-Eyed Susan: If you could be any animal for a day, what would it be?

I'd be like a doggo bc it would be the most fun i think-

Bloodroots: When you were a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up?

I wanted to be a vet but then when my granny asked me "but whos gonna clean up the animal poop?" I was like "eWW pO0pP!" and then decided that mayb i shouldn't be a vet

Bluemink: What are your thoughts on children?

They're either really kind and sweet

Or literal demons from hell

Legit no inbetween

Blazing Stars: What are you afraid of? Is there a reason why?

I'm afraid of lot of things-

Borage: Give a random fact about your childhood.

I was one dumbass bitcg-

Bugleherb: How would you spend your last day on Earth?

Idk eat pizza and cry or smth ajakamkw

Buttercup: Relationship Status?

Single

Camelia: If you could visit anywhere, where would you want to go?

NEW YORKKK, CONCRETE JUNGLE WHERE DREAMS ARE MADE OFFF THERE'S NOTHING YOU CAN'T DO NOW YOU'RE IN NEW YOOORKKK

Candytufts: When do you feel most loved?

When someone hugs me or just generally spends time with me

Canna: Do you have any tattoos?

Nop

Canterbury Bells: Do you have any piercings?

I used to have piercings when i was a bab but eHh haven't worn them since and i dont think my ear holes are big enough now-

California Poppy: Height?

4'10 grrr I'm the omega midget and I'll devour ur ankles

Cardinal Flower: Do you believe in ghosts?

Nop

Carnation: What are you currently wearing?

Pant, pink top and black hoodie

Catnip: Have you ever slept with a nightlight?

I think i have??

Chives: Who was the last person you hugged?

My mom and my dad

Chrysanthemum: Who’s the last person you kissed?

I never kith

Cock’s Comb: Favorite font?

I dont have one so imma say sans bc it always looks out of place and makes me laugh-

Columbine: Are you tired?

No

I feel like screaming and jumping around my room like a crackhead

Common Boneset: What are you looking forward to?

Nothing in particular ig

Coneflower: Dream job?

Smth kinda fun and art or design related hopefully,,,,

Crane’s-Bill: Introvert or extrovert?

Introvert but i also get lonley easily

Crocus: Have you ever been in love?

Nop,,,,

Crown Imperial: What’s the farthest you would go for someone you care about?

I would get run over by 5 monster trucks, jump off a plane, get mauled by 10 bears, get trampled on by a stampede, get brutally tortured for 12 hours straight, yeet myself into the Grand Canyon and then break all my bones with my bare hands if they weren't broken already

Ok basically i care a lot

Cyclamen: Did you have a favorite stuffed animal as a child? What was it?

I had this st bernard plush called Sparky and this lion named Sammy,,

Daffodil: What’s your zodiac sign?

Libra

Dahlia: Have you done anything worth remembering?

My memory is legit so bad it's probably concerning uHHH

Daisy: What do you feel is your greatest accomplishment?

Mayb art??

Daylily: What would you do if your parents didn’t like your partner(s)?

Ehhh i might reason with them and then if they still disagreed I'd just keep the relationship a secret

Dendrobium: Who is the last person that you said “I love you” to?

My parents

False Goat’s Beard: What is something you are good at?

Ehhh arT

Foxgloves: What’s something you’re bad at?

EhhHh everything that isn't art-

Freesia: What are three good things that have happened in the past month?

Oh boy here comes my shitty memory-

Hmmm

Idk but I'm mostly happy that I've been more social and stuff and i feel like im kinda coming out of my shell a bit

Not sure what to say for other 2 bc nothing in particular has really happend?

Garden Cosmos: How was your day today?

Ehhh oK??

Gardenia: Are you happy with where you’re at in your life?

Mayhapsn't

Gladiolus: What is something you hope to do in the next year or two?

I hope to pass all my exams and get an okish job mayb

Glory-of-the-Snow: What are ten things that make you happy/you’re grateful to have in your life?

1.fRIENBS ILY MY HABIBIS

2. Fammm

3. eHhh yummy food,,

4. Drawing and uhhh art

5. EPIC MUTUALS

6. Ok idk what else aside from like serious stuff like house and etc.-

Heliotropium: What helps you calm down when you feel stressed?

Drawing, crying, venting to a friend/parent

Hellebore: How do you show affection?

Hugssss,kith,cuddle, *draws u stuff*

Hoary Stock: What are you proudest of?

MmmmmMy aRRt?

Hollyhock: Describe your ideal day.

Wake up

Don't go to school

Vibe with friends

Sleeb

Hyacinth: What do you like to do in your free time?

MmMmMM aRT-

Hydrangea: How long have you known your best friend? How did you meet them?

Ehh 8yrs? We met in hell school

Irises: Who can you talk to about (almost) everything?

Friendos

Mom

Laceleaf: How many friends do you have?

6..?? Aa idk theres some people that idk if they'd consider me a friend or not,,

Lantanas: What’s the best compliment you’ve ever received?

Idk any compliment is best compliment for me,,

Larkspur: What do you think of yourself?

Ew yucky gröss

Lavender: What’s your favorite thing about yourself?

m y a r t

Also my hair bc its soft and wavy,,

Leather Flower: What’s your least favorite thing about yourself?

Everything else-

Lilac: What’s something you liked to do as a child?

Climb trees and do dumb shit

Lily: Who was your best friend when you were a kid?

Same irl bestie i mentioned before

Lily of the Incas: What is something you still feel guilty for?

MmmmmmMMM,,,

Lily of the Nile: What is something you feel guilty for that you shouldn’t feel guilty about?

MMMmMMmMMMMmmmMMm,,,,,,

Lupine: What does your name mean? Why is that your name?

Well I chose Fae bc i thought it sounded pretty

Marigold: Where did you grow up? Tell us about it.

Idk what to rlly say lmao

Morning Glory: What was your bedroom like growing up?

Kinda the same but i had toys everywhere-

Also when i was like 5 i had this legit fucking cursed thomas the tank engine shaped bed that i actually found a pic of but it's FUCKING HORRIFYING SO I PROBS WONT SHOW HERE-

Mugworts: What was it like for you as a teenager? Did you enjoy your teenage years?

EW BEING A TEENAGER SUCKS ASS HOW DO I UNDO????

Norwegian Angelica: Tell us about your mom.

Hi mom ily ur epic

Onions: Tell about your dad.

Hi dad ily ur epic

Orchid: Tell about your grandparents.

Omg i miss my grannies sm bc i couldn't see em this year bc nasty pandemic

Pansy: What was your most memorable birthday? What made it be so memorable?

Haha shit memory gor brrRR-

I don't really remember too many specific parties but when i was like 7-10 i had these epic parties in those birthday places with the giant play areas

I kinda wish i wasn't too old to go to them sobs

Peony: What was your first job?

I haven't had a job yet

Petunia: If you’re in a relationship, how did you meet your partner(s)? If you’re not in a relationship, how did you meet your crush/how do you hope to meet your future partner(s), if you want any?

Hmmmm idk? I haven't really thought abt that but i don't really mind i just wanna find someone to vibe with,,

Pincushion: How do you deal with pain?

I cri

Pink: Where is home?

Home is home home

Plantain Lilies: If you could go back in time, what is one thing you would stop/change?

Now where do i start...

Prairie Gentian: Who is someone you look up to? Describe them.

I look up to people that are kind, caring, brave, funny, cool or stronger than me ig?

Primrose: Describe your ideal life.

Basically my current life minus school, stress,pandemic and responsibilities lmao

Rhodendron: What is something you used to believe in as a child?

I used to believe in ghosts after i thought i encountered one

Ricinus: Who’s the most important in your life?

Hermmmst

Rose: What’s your favorite sound?

Peoples laughsss also music

Rosemallows: What’s your favorite memory?

Bro i dont have one,, my aphantasia makes it hard for me to remember stuff-

Sage: What’s your least favorite memory?

A

Snapdragon: At this moment, what do you want?

I wantttt better chargersss thattt donttt telll meee thatt myyy tablett will finishh chargingg innn 1 dayy andd 7 hoursss

St. John’s Wort: Is it easy or difficult for you to express how you feel about things?

Kinda difficult but im opening up more

Sunflower: What is something you don’t want to imagine life without?

fRIENDS,,,,,wAh

Sweet Pea: How much sleep did you get last night?

8 hrs

Tickseed: What’s your main reason to get up every morning?

Idk ig i kinda have to go to school and do stuff

Touch-Me-Not: How do you feel about your current job?

Non existant

Transvaal Daisy: What’s your favorite item of clothing?

My black and white stripy top, and all my hoodiess

Tropical White Morning Glory: Describe your aesthetic.

I don't think i have just one aesthetic bc im drawn to so many different aesthetics at the same time-

Like vintage, neon, dark, spoopy, pastel, cute, etc etc

Tulip: What would be the best present to get you?

OMG I LEGIT JUST SCREAM AT ANYTHING ANYONE GIVES ME-

IF SOMEONE GOES OUT OF THEIR WAY TO MAKE ME SMTH I CRY,,

Vervain: What’s stressing you out most right now?

🤏

Wisteria: How many books have you read in the past few months? What were they called?

I haven't been reading anythinggg

But i should really finish reading Percy Jackson bc it do be picking up dust-

Wolf’s Bane: Where do you want to be in life this time next year?

Everywhere

Yarrow: Do you know what vore is?

Mmm yummy 👅

Zinnia: Give a random fact about yourself.

I am currently living and breathing yes

[szopenhauer]

If someone has bad breath, do you tell him or her? doubtful, I don’t wanna hurt anyone, it’s awkward and a lot of ppl can’t change how they smell

Do you have an item that comforts you when you are sad/scared? used to have one special object, I still hold it sometimes, I suppose I might again at night from Friday to Saturday 

When are you likely to hide your emotions? when I’m face to face with an authority figure like boss, teacher or doctor, policeman too but I never been in a situation like this with them, I also hide my emotions from abusers at times to not show I’m afraid of them and to not provoke them more as well

Which is scarier: Dying of thirst or of starvation? I guess starvation as it takes longer

Have you ever tried to help someone quit smoking? it’s their decision to smoke, I don’t approve but I won’t get involved, I can only avoid them

Have you ever had to talk anyone out of suicide? self harm more likely, I mean... I was talking with suicidal people about them wanting to kill themselves but never at the moment when they were doing it so I don’t know if that counts

When you think of tomorrow, what feelings come to mind? packing, last day with my parents before I go to the hospital

What is the last thing you complained about? probably health related issues

What was the last curse-word you said? kurwa

When you fake sick to get out of school, what do you say or do to convince your parents that you are sick? I don’t fake sick, I might exaggerate but I won’t lie, I don’t want to worry my parents and because I’m chronicall ill I often was going to school even though I didn’t felt like it

Do you still talk to your very first best friend? no

When was the last time something went terribly wrong? basically everything goes wrong

How do you console someone when he or she is upset? depends

Choose one: Trip to outerspace, or trip underneath the oceans? no thx

How often do you feel overwhelmed? all the damn time

How do you deal with everyday life? poorly 

Who in your family do you act like the most? my dad

What is the most romantically sweet thing someone has done for you? my gf is doing many sweet things 

Have you ever been confronted by a mall cop for your behavior? I’ve never been confronted by the store guard - elseway I would never go back there out of anxiety

Is there someone that makes you feel like you’re walking on eggshells? my mom

Were you ever afraid of one of your past teachers? sorta XD

Have you ever been in a physical fight on school grounds? I was attacked but I didn’t fight back so...

A homeless man asks you for 50 cents; how do you respond? dunno

When was the last time you visited a thrift store? recently

Can you handle constructive criticism? I can’t handle any criticism :(

Who is the most sensitive person that you know? me?...

When was the last time you wrote someone a note? few days ago

Do you tell your parents before you go somewhere, or just leave? I always tell

What was the last thing you tried to get out of doing? not sure what was last hmm...

Which season do you dread the most? winter

Is there a foreign culture you’d like to learn more about? maybe

Have you ever seen a famous painting and thought “I could have done that?” abstract art

What is the scariest thing about attending your school? which one?

Are you a good judge of other people’s intentions? I got better with time 

Shopping: best with friends, parents, bf/gf, or alone? depends

When was the last time someone told you to turn your music down? my mother sometimes asks me to because she has migraines

When you don’t know how to spell a word, do you look it up? not always *ashamed*

Are you one to spend a lot of time in the bathroom? nope but I’m the one that often goes to the bathroom 

Do you ever consider the challenges other races go through? sure

When was the last time you doubted your abilities? I have... abilities? :o

What was the last thing you wished for? health... not gonna happen tho :(

How many times a day, on average, do you look at the time? several, when I wake up then when I eat and between meals and then when I go to sleep and in the middle of the night if I go to pee

Where do you first remember living? I never moved

First fandom? woah I don’t remember 

First otp/ship? neither

How old were you when you first when on a plane? -

What was your first tattoo?  -

Do you remember the last movie you saw while on a date? show - She-ra, movie - A lot like love

Did you lose your virginity before you were sixteen? nooo

How many purses do you own? too many lol Are you bi? am not Who was your prom date? I never had one, I didn’t go to prom

Who was the last person to see you cry? parent[s]

Have you ever been used? yep

Do you like when girl takes you by surprise and kisses you? I like consent but... those were the best kisses ^^’’

Have you ever gone for someone despite knowing they were bad for you? I didn’t think about the future nor that I deserve love What kind of gift can win you over? what do you mean by WIN ME OVER? Are diamonds really a girls best friend? not mine, I don’t care for diamonds 

Have you ever dated someone with a child? no way  Have you ever dated someone shorter than you? Sarah was shorter

Who has made the biggest sacrifice for you? my parents and my current partner

What sound is annoying you right now? it’s quiet :3

What gives you a peaceful feeling? sleep?

Would you rather live in the city, suburbs or the country? country

Are you more of a maker and giver, or a taker and user? taker and user I suppose

Do you buy holiday gifts early or at the last minute? early

If someone else were to describe you what would you hope they would say? the truth

Do you think it is harder for a parent to outlive their child or for the child to outlive their parent? parent to outlive the child because it’s not common

When do you do your best thinking? evening/night

What was a choice that you didn’t want to make but you had to? majority of decisions are smth I’d prefer not to make

What age do you think it is most difficult to be? to each their own

Do you think you could handle a day in jail? who knows

Have you ever been on a trampoline? I have not

Do you pretend to be something you’re not to make friends? I’m being myself and that’s why I’m friendless :P

Are you more of a shy or outgoing person? I’m introverted antisocial and a loner but I’m not shy, I can be loud and talkative

Are you more of an athlete or artist? artist Are you the type to procrastinate? I put PRO in procrastination  Do you believe that you’ll always be a kid at heart? ;) What is something you want to improve on this year? health, I’m trying  How many times a day do you get angry? uh oh... If you could eat any food you want right now, what would it be? personal Can you sleep with your eyes open? I’m no Gandalf

Do you still have any living grandparents? If so, how old are they? I don’t wanna talk about that

What’s your favorite computer game genre? simulations Do you have any exes your parents never liked? pfft Do you ever keep things just because they might be useful someday? we are hoarders

Are you frequently in a bad mood? sorry... Do you ever fill out surveys while in a bad mood? I go through soooo many moods before I finish one survey  Are you a fast or a slow eater? slowest among my friends, fastest in my house  How old were you when you had your first relationship? no idea what I should call a relationship and what not  Do you get dental checkups at least once a year? yup Is there anyone in your family/household whom you frequently argue with? mom, sister before she moved out Have you ever used chewing tobacco? tha hell? that’s disgusting!

Do you play Pokemon Go? If so, what level are you and who’s your buddy? not applicable Do you ever sit indoors and wear sunglasses or a hat? hat Are you putting off doing something right now? If so, what is it? drying my hair, drinking water and going to sleep mostly

Are you like me and hoard notebooks and pens? pens now, I stopped buying notebooks... oh wait... no... I just got one because I wanted to save bees, nvm... Are you sitting in front of or by a window? What can you see out there? by, it’s dark but there’s my neighbor’s house Are there any coasters on your table? If so, do they have text or pictures? flowers Do you have a song playing in your head right now, too? not really Don’t you hate it when people answer to surveys with one word answers? lame *I realized I did that myself *facepalm* Ever watched a cat or a dog sleep and run/twitch in their sleep? adorable <3 What’s something we do every day but they don’t depict in movies? it bothers me that in fantasy/sci-fi movies there are no toilets and meals are rare

Is your style feminine, masculine or somewhere in the middle? in the middle, childish yet of an old person haha Do you usually carry a backpack, a shoulder bag or something else? shoulder bag or tote  Do you wear glasses? If so, have you ever tried to fix them when they’ve broken? helped my dad fix his glasses couple of times Are there a lot of dragonflies around your house? they don’t show up frequently

[foxstens]

lemme just rant bc smth happened and i have Thoughts :(

so last night we were out in the city walking and at one point there was this huge ass crowd going past us bc a football match had just finished in the area

and we were just walking and i was talking abt pasta and at point this group of teenagers passed us and one of them pushed the other so that he bumped into me

i didn’t take it too seriously bc i recently saw some kids playing the same way so i just thought it was an accident but my mom stopped and looked really mad. like she didn’t do anything but later she said she nearly punched the guy

the thing is, these things happen sometimes, though i would’ve assumed they’d stop once i was out of school. but i’ve always had a hard time talking about it with her bc the conversation always goes the exact same way

obviously since i’ve been struggling with this my entire life, at one point i started assuming there was something wrong with me, but she says that’s not the case

then she goes and says she wishes i was ‘stronger’ and more self-confident. i’m like ‘i feel like i’ve changed a lot since i was in school’ but she says it doesn’t show. and when i ask how i can change she says the want to change needs to come from within

and i’m just fricking confused here because 1. that doesn’t help and 2. by saying this she is basically saying that i’m at fault here. and it’s been years since i was first told that i should be more outgoing and more sure of myself but somehow in all this time i’ve not become either of those things

and she always bases this off of her own experiences. she had some light experience with bullying in high school i guess and then she got married and she had me and she had a divorce. then she had a really bad time during which we had to live with my grandparents. and then when she was around 30 yrs old we got an apartment, moved away, and she found a particular partner who basically inspired her to change.

he was extremely supportive and he taught her how to do things for herself and she took her to places she’d never been and yea, he was just a positive influence on our life. but idk how she wants me to change the same way she did when my childhood traumas and life experiences are so very different

i’m 24 rn, i’ve struggled with bullying my entire life, i never had a proper father figure and my grandparents had a substantial influence on my upbringing. the most notable things i’ve done until now were going through 3 years of uni only to never finish it, and getting a job a year ago.

so i don’t know what exactly could inspire me to change the way she wants me to. also saying things like this just makes her look like a hypocrite bc she often says there’s nothing wrong with my personality and that my grandparents are dumb for wanting me to be a different person

BUT THEN AGAIN WHY DO I HAVE TO CHANGE WHEN OTHERS ARE ASSHOLES. she says i should be working to improve myself and that she doesn’t think i am, when in fact i am but not through self-help books or trying to look for friends since i’m more interested in languages and cultures and learning about the world and how to be more open and knowledgeable 

then there’s the fact that, i don’t necessarily want to change. for one despite everything i kind of like my personality, and i feel like so much of who i am is directly due to my traumas and experiences that i don’t know who i’d be without that. and i also don’t feel like there’s a way for me to change naturally any time soon, so if i were to try it’d just feel forced which would definitely backfire spectacularly

but you know, me trying to be different and trying to live up to society’s expectations doesn’t guarantee anything, so why should i. she always says that she’s given up on trying to be what others expect her to be so why is it so wrong when i do the same.

idk it’s just. she says i’m fine the way i am and she loves me as i am but then in a different conversation she says i should change to prevent these things from happening. so?????????? oh and she sometimes says she feels like she can’t protect me or like it’s her fault that i turned out like this and im just

t h a n k s. that’s definitely the most appropriate thing to say WHEN IM THE ONE WHO’S BEEN STRUGGLING WITH THIS MY ENTIRE LIFE 

also what about other people who have a similar personality and might struggle with similar things. should they also radically change their personality just in case it might help? do they actually not have a place in this world??? WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[alicesgreatadventure]

I'm safe to share this now......

This has been an ongoing source of stress in my life and I feel safe enough to tell Tumblr about it now because typing the story will help me sort through it a little bit better and the issue has been “resolved.” For the purpose of this story, the boy it centers around will be named Jaden Brown or smth. So my family and the Browns have been friends for a few years. My dad and Jadens dad both coach my little brothers baseball team. So, naturally, our families hang out together all the time. The Brown family has three kids, the younger ones hang out with my younger brother. Jaden, who is my age, hang out with me. Everyone has someone and it works out perfectly. So everybody is in the pool, being social, meaning that Jaden and I are somewhere else. We were sitting by the fire pit in my front yard. This would be very romantic if we were even mildly interested in each other. Funnily enough, we'd been talking about the girl Jaden was interested in, we'll call her Abby. Then shit kinda got weird. Him: so Abby texted me the other day when she was leaving a movie theatre. She saw beauty and the beast and she said it made her cry and it was really good. I don't get why people cry in movies to be honest. Me: bro idk I cry in movies all the time. Just because they're sad you know? Him: I guess, but like, movies don't really make me feel anything Me: well I guess some people r just like that *expects the topic to change* Him: Honestly, I don't really feel anything in real life. Me: *beginning to get scared* What? Him: I mean, I know what I'm supposed to feel. I just don't,,,,,feel it. I act, I guess. Me: *sufficiently freaked the fuck out* What? Him: idk I wouldn't really have a problem killing someone. Me: *shitting bricks* oh? What do u mean. Him: I have super vivid dreams about it all the time. I've killed my friends, my family, Abby, *laughs* even you! Sometimes when I wake up I remember how I did it sometimes I don't. Me: do u remember how u killed me? *shit fuck shit god fucking damn it I don't wanna know shit* Him: Yep. *graphic description that could be triggering* Me: *FUCK* But u wouldn't actually kill your someone would you? Him: Depends. Me: *nervously* on what? Him: on what they did Me: *internally flips shit* but not ur family tho Him: depends. Me: *already knowing answer but hoping for a better outcome this time* on what? Him: I already told u, what they did. Me: *trying not to look at all shocked by any of this for fear of triggering a full mental break down from him* hmm. Him: yeah, the closest I've ever come to killing someone is your little brother. Me: *knowing this kid is a black belt is a black belt in karate and freaking out more.* *loving my little brother and wanting nothing but to run to him and hug him* you almost killed my little brother? Him: yeah. When him and my little brother hang out they're so fucking annoying it makes me wanna snap their necks. Me: *almost crying* oh Him: yeah I've only told two other people this. One thought I was joking and one still gets nervous around me. Me: *gee I wonder why* wow, uhhhh, wow Him: so yeah anyway back to that girl Needless to say, I was shocked. Like, what the fuck? That doesn't happen to people? Asfksmdkannf? It didn't make sense. We continued hanging out until he left, and I tried to act normal to ensure my own safety. Immediately after he left, I called a friend. He basically told me, " hey, yeah that's creepy as hell." So I told the rest of my close friends, hoping for advice. All of the them said, TELL YOUR MOM. This was something I was nervous as FUCK to do though. And I was already second guessing myself. What if it was a dream? What if my mind is just bored and fucking w me? I knew neither of those things were true. So I waited. The next time jaden came over I was with a friend. Everything was v normal. He wasn't acting strange. I ended up playing "Stardust Girl" for my friend while he was there and he was super supportive, telling me I was super talented, and I should publish that. He even texted me later that night telling me the same thing. In other words, he acted nice. And normal. Like, what? This left me more confused than ever. I go to a therapist once a month so I decided I'd wait, and talk to her. Therapy- Me: tells story Her: tell your fucking mother :) Me: k thx ily bye :) Her: k see u later :) So I went home, and my mother was just returning from vacation. I decided I'd let her catch up on work before I added to her stress. She ended up getting sick so I waited like four days. She was in my room and she asked, hey, is there something u wanna tell me? So I told her. She has her masters degree in psychology so she wasn't a stranger to this kinda stuff. She agreed that it was very concerning and decided she would talk to her old therapist to help her decide how to tell Jaden's mother. My mom told the rest of our family and eventually arranged a lunch date with Jaden's mom. By the time this happened I was flying to my grandparents house. The moment I got off the plane I called her. Me: HOWD IT GO?!?!? Her: idek what the fuck. What? Me: what happened? Her: Jaden's mom believed you. She said she knows you and knows this isn't something you'd make up. She said she also knows Jaden. He is the most emotional of her kids and he's always the first one to run to help when anything happens and the first one to get emotional when someone is upset. So basically Jaden's mom thanked me and went home to talk to him. He admitted to telling you all of that. He even came over and apologized to your father and I! He was crying, his mom was crying, I was crying. He said "I told her all of that but it's not true" "I'm so sorry" "I would never hurt Rhiana or her brother" and stuff like that. And you know what his reasoning was? Me: it better have been a fucking good one. Her: *laughs* but rlly idk what to make of the reason. He said it was because he and I were talking about family stuff earlier and I had explained to him that there was a history of depression, anxiety, and suicide in my family. His reason? Since he had a history of murderers in his family(true fact there's a documentary about his aunt she was a serial killer) he decided he'd keep the convo going. By telling u that. Me: wow. Fuck Her: ik it's fucking weird We continued to discuss for a while and came to the conclusion that Jaden and I would have to talk. I agreed, thinking I'd decide for myself wether he was telling the truth when I saw him. The one thing that didn't add up? We had, at one point, talked about our family pasts. It had been hours earlier in the night. I have yet to return from my grandparents house so I will let you guys know how everything goes. And believe it or not, you know that camping trip I'm going on right when I get back? Yeah it's with his family. So the first time I'll see him is when I'm living right next to him for 5 days. Anyway sorry this was sooo long but I needed to get it out and type it to help myself review everything that happened before seeing him. Also I will be continuing my break from tumblr after this but I needed to sort everything out. I love you guys❤️

[yumikat]

rip here we go bois. was tagged by @kwamimusings (yeh bud) i’m very canadian so i changed all the “favorite”s to “favourite”

Rules: Answer the 20 questions and tag 20 like 2 because i’m lazy amazing followers you’d like to get to know better!

Name: let’s go with Yumi

Nicknames: see above. idk y’all can make nicknames or smth??

Zodiac Sign: gemini

Height: 6′4″-ish

Orientation: i sexually identify as an attack helicopter (jk i’m straight)

Ethnicity: chinese

Favourite Fruit: i would kill a man for an orange slice. vitamin c flows through my veins. 

Favourite Season: winter. snow. yes.

Favourite Book: ohhhh boy. i will still have to say the original pjato series, though harry potter and lunar chronicles are really good. 

Favourite Flower: what. 

Favourite Scent: this will sound weird but i like the scent of my friends. also butter frying smells reaaaaally good

Favourite animals: cattens are life. though wolves and marine life are pretty cool too. 

Coffee, Tea, or Hot Cocoa: sauce me my tim hortons iced capp

Cat or Dog Person: did i say i love cattens because cats are my life

Favourite Fictional Character: there’s a lot of those. let’s go with homestuck characters - tz, dave, vriska, roxy are up there. 

Dream Trip: ??? uhhh hiking the lotr scenery in new zealand or driving up to the northern territories to stargaze with mes amis

Blog Created: octoberish 2015?

Number of Followers: 134

What I Post About: whatever’s on my dash + my art. (typically homestuck, voltron, ml, and dumb posts)

Do I get asks on a regular basis: naw son

Aesthetic: stuff that is aesthetic is like really nicely lit photography with good contrast levels, but my aesthetic is like idk neons/pastels/rainbows and crap. i guess idk. 

Hogwarts House: HUFFLEPUFF PRIDE!!!!! WE HAVE NEWT AND WE’RE BETTER THAN YOU 

right so i wasn’t sure if i was supposed to do the next part but i’ll just put a cut right here because it’s getting long

Rules: Write 92 rules about yourself, then tag 25 people. who even knows 25 people

LAST ___:

Drink: watermelon juice at a hot pot place Phone Call: probably my mom????? Text message: i don’t have a phone but last IM thing would be a group chat with some girls from church Song you listened to: no idea let’s say the heathers soundtrack Time you cried: i teared up for logan

HAVE YOU EVER ____: Dated someone twice: “Kinda need to date someone once to do it twice.” -aaron Been cheated on: “Again, kinda need to have ever been in a relationship in order to be cheated on.” -aaron Kissed someone and then regretted it: “Can’t regret it if you’ve never kissed anyone. (Insert picture of guy tapping his temple here)” -aaron (haha single squad) Lost someone special: no, luckily Been depressed: i don’t get affected by much so no Gotten drunk and thrown up: i’m. underage. 

LIST THREE FAVOURITE COLOURS: turquoise is a blessing to this planet, maroon is pre nice, black is the colour of my soul but it doesn’t count, so there are certain shades of pink that are pretty nice, even though i’m a non-conformist. 

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU _____: Made new friends: ya bud new girl in the ib fam and some kool kids here on tumbs Fallen out of love: *insert joke about the bitterness of school* Laughed until you cried: @mrs-linny-universe remember that post with the googly eyes Found out someone was talking about you: no...? Met someone who changed you: i think everyone you meet changes you, because if you never met them then you would be a different person completely and the path of your life would have diverged (is that enough bs yes it is let’s move on) Found out who your true friends are: what does that even mean it sounds omnious Kissed someone on your Facebook list: wat. (actually, yes. i peck my friends on the cheek all the time)

GENERAL: How many Facebook friends do you know in real life: all of them. i keep getting friend requests from friends of friends in edmonton and it confuses me because do i know you? no.  Do you have any pets: i had a crested gecko named charlie but he died Do you want to change your name: no? What did you do for your last birthday: i think a movie with my friends.  What time did you wake up: 9:30am here, 6:30pm back home. heck yeah time zones What were you doing at midnight last night: sleeping lol i only slept 3 hours during the 20-something hour travel time. 

Name something you cannot wait for: for ib to be over and for hiveswap to come out When was the last time you saw your mother: she’s beside me right now hi mom What is something you wish you could change about your life: i never really thought about it?  What are you listening to right now: parents/aunt/uncle/grandparents chatting Have you ever talked to a person named tom: yeah man. every time i see him i say hi to him but he’s neurodivergent so he never really replies Something that is getting on your nerves: vpn is slow but it’s better than not talking to my friends for 2 weeks.  Most visited website: email and tumblr Elementary: classified High school: classified, but it’s a private school and we have hoodies with our uniform which is pretty nice College: i’m still in high school rip Hair colour: black. i’m asian.  Long or short hair: got a pixie cut a few months ago, i always grow it out really long and then chop it off again Do you have a crush on someone: i guess??? What do you like about yourself: arty art Piercings: naw son  Blood type: idk but mosquitoes love me and i hate mosquitoes Nickname: we’ve already established this Relationship status: married to @seokgis​, in a side relationship with @thelifeditch (jokes i’m single) Zodiac sign: we’ve already gone over this Pronouns: she/her  Favourite TV show: idk i guess ml or voltron for animated and stranger things for live action? i don’t think about this much.  Tattoos: underage lol Right or left hand: right

FIRST ____: Surgery: naw son Piercing: lol Best friend: first bestie i remember is this girl named sharon back when i was like 3-7 i think.  Sport: mom forced me to do swimming but i really liked skating before i was too inflexible Vacation: does immigrating to canada count, bc then i think it was the time my friend dz and i went to capilano Pair of trainers: i think this means either bike trainers or what british people call runners but i still don’t get what the question is asking so sure?

RIGHT NOW ___: Eating: just ate an orange. they are my lifeblood Drinking: i literally never drink liquids it’s so bad for me (but yeah i just drank some oj and i’m laughing because i didn’t even realize) About to: sit here and waste time on tumblr, maybe do some tok, probably sleep because we’re going to leave for the airport at like 3-something-am for the chinese tropics or smth Listening to: we’ve done this let’s move on Waiting for: i live in the moment. *snickers and breaks down in laughter because the real answer is i have no idea* Want: sleep, maybe? i always want to sleep. also, like aaron, i would like a hug.  Get married: like i said, i’m already married (jk i’m still in high school, but yeah i would like to get married in the future) Career: “your high school career is very important” - said no one ever (or maybe it’s everyone ever, who knows)

WHICH IS BETTER ____: Hugs or kisses: hugs Lips or eyes: eyes  Shorter or taller: like think is for ppl im interested in right. taller, then.  Older or younger: older would be less weird? Nice arms or nice stomach: arms? i ain’t spending time looking at ppls’ stomachs Sensitive or loud: what.  Hook up or relationship: relationship Troublemaker or hesitant: lemme just ask WHAT ARE THESE QUESTIONS

HAVE YOU EVER ____: Kissed a stranger: naw song lol Drank hard liquor: what defines hard liquor, because i’ve sipped some like really high percentage alcohol but i don’t drink. Lost glasses/contact lenses: rip my contact lens just fell out of my eye once.  Turned someone down: um i don’t think so? Sex on first date: SHEILD MY INNOCENT EYES YEESH I’M 16 I PREACH ABSTINENCE Broken someone’s heart: idk about broken, but maybe Had your own heart broken: nope :) Been arrested: i’m too young for this Cried when someone died: no one really close to me has died so no Fallen for a friend: haha everyone i’ve fallen for has been my friend

DO YOU BELIEVE IN ____: Yourself: yeah? Miracles: if i didn’t i would have to not believe in Jesus (awkwardly phrased but i think you get the picture) Love at first sight: if you see someone and you just “fall in love” then that puts love lightly. i think that love is something really serious and needs to be developed.  Santa Claus: i’m too old for thi-- JUST HEAR THOSE SLEIGH BELLS JINGLING Kiss on the first date: depends on who Angels: yaaa. again, comes with my faith (i hate phrasing stuff like this because it makes it sound trivial but i honestly don’t know how to say it)

OTHER ____: Current best friend’s name: i have several Eye colour: brown Movie: oooooh boy. i love lotr but i’m also that one person that loves every single movie, even the ones that every say sucked. proof: i absolutely loved suicide squad. i’m also a cinematography nerd but i just fangirl over the shots and never really think about them lol

okay i tag everyone who read this to the end and the people who i mentioned earlier because i’m really lazy 

[cozygirlfromthebook-blog]

I’m probably the luckiest girl in the world.

I have everything that an average person needs to be happy.Everything that’s happened in my life has done me only good even if at that moment I thought it was my worst day.Every person in my life has been someone good and kind if I take out a few.

I am happy.I have two families(one my own and another one overseas),I have loyal friends I can fully trust.I have friends I can have fun with and friends I can learn from.God has blessed me with so many great people.But the fact is,I recently realized that.

I wasn’t born in a family that was in good financial state.I can even say that back then my family was even below the working class.That’s why I was born very skinny and not very healthy.I weighed 1,5 kg which,in fact,was very little.They kept me in that “glass box” looking thing at first where the weak babies go.But my doctor has said I’d be a really smart one.I stayed there for some time.I’ve been growing up in a very small town which wasn’t developed.My grandma taught me how to read and write when I was 4 so I started going to the library since I was 5.I went to a small school but I was one of the top students.Always.Until I went to HS.That’s where I first realized that school doesn’t really educate you neither makes you smart.I mean,it does but not in the way I imagined.And all the years I’d spent struggling and getting good grades didn’t mean anything then.Overall,I’ve had very nice teachers like I mentioned.I only didn’t like the principal of my HS.I still don’t know why.Not that she was a saint anyways.But my teachers have always been good to me.So have my classmates.Well,we’ve had some conflicts about stuff but that doesn’t matter.They’re still my classmates.And they were great too.Always.I had a best friend.Actually two but the other one went to college instead of HS so we kinda split up.I’m still friends with both and I still consider her my bestie but we’ll get to that later.

So,I don’t wanna talk about all the scholastic things I took part in cause they don’t really matter.There have been competitions and olimpiads and stuff like that.I was always in but it didn’t change anything.So I wasn’t inspired at all.But then,FLEX happened.I became one of the lucky 46 students to go to the States and spend a year there in a host family.At the age of 16.That felt great.Really great.I don’t wanna say I got haters or anything cause I don’t wanna call anyone a hater.But the people that had always been with me were there again and that was enough for me.My mom,sister,dad,besties and my favorite neighbour,and more other people who I guess were only curious about what was going on.You know,the kind of people that are curious about everyone’s life.The day came and I left Armenia.The kids were great too.I mean,a really good group it was.But I wasn’t enough.I was an introvert and still am.I don’t know why.I don’t really talk a lot and I’m not as energetic as most of those kids were.But anyways they were great and treated me nicely.That one year was awesome too.I mean,I couldn’t ask for a better host family.Them and their relatives which are now mine too,God they were sooo awesome!They treated me like I was a family member and that’s how I felt.The parents weren’t very strict towards me and we were more friends than “parents and daughter”.I can say the same thing about the grandparents and Papa and Grandma too.I loved them and always will.That’s another “group” of great people in my life.

Then I came back.And went to school again.With new kids.They weren’t as good as my old friends but still treated me nicely so I don’t have anything against them.I still could manage to find some great personalities like I always do.And another girl became my other best friend.I was kinda crossed with my old one cause she had found a new close friend when I was in the States.When I got back we didn’t argue but I showed her I didn’t wanna talk to that girl at all and even blamed my bestie for having her.That lasted for more than a year and our relations weren’t like before.But that’s another story too.Just wanna mention that I was tottally wrong doing that and I shouldn’t have done that.So,these kids were good too.

Then college happened.I got accepted to UFAR with also that other bestie of mine.I thought these were going to be my worst 4 yrs but God blessed me this time too because my faculty is litteraly great.Everyone is very nice even if they talk behind your back.Most kids accept each other and are very friendly while I’m I wouldn’t have seen that in another university.

And to finish,there have been many more good people in my life.An old man I remember who made some homemade treatments for my head skin disease.We’d go to his house in the village and he made that medicine.He put it on my head himself and it hurt sooo much.Then he’d let me eat fruits from the trees in his small garden that was right by his house.I remember his wife.They were such nice people.And also the woman who is my cosmetologist.She’s soo nice though I pay less than I’m supposed to because my causin is her friend.Also the old man who sells used books on the street.I buy books from him.He has read a lot and always helps me find what I want.And my economics professor who is a man of 47 and he pays attention to me more than to anyone else but I think that’s cause I always have a question for him.Always.I got a 20/20 from his subject.He said he was proud to have a student like me.I felt proud too cause he’s my idol.He’s the most intelligent and kindest person I’ve ever met.But he never shows that.He always looks like he’s mad or smth and he always has a serious facial expression the one that makes you serious too.That’s probably why I adore him so much.And I kinda see me in him cause I feel like we have a lot in common.The way he used to study is the same that I do now.His serious and kinda cold facial expression that I have.The fact that he’s warm mostly to his loved ones which I do too.Even before I got to know him.He’s me and he knows that too.We just represent different generations.And one thing he has-kindness-which again he almost never shows,I wanna achieve that kind of character to be as kind as him and to have a good heart as he does.

[szopenhauer]

Do you have pockets in anything you are wearing currently? I don’t

Have you ever tasted your own tears? it’s hard not to when you cry so often

Do you hang your clothes outside or put it in the dryer? outside, not during wither tho

Do you like the letter q or the letter z better? Z

Do you do anything weird in your sleep? who knows

How many times can you jump in jumproping? I didn’t jump for a long time now so I dunno if I can jump as many times as I used to - doubt it

Do you like the beach? I like wet sand, beachcombing

Have you ever built a sandcastle? I suppose, I want to do that again sometime

Is there a mirror in the room that you are in? not a hanging one

What color is your comb? one is white and other two are red

When did you pull out your first tooth? I don’t remember

How old were you when you said your first word? same

Have you ever had a pet rabbit? hell no

Do you like the autumn? it’s fine unless weather gets really cold and snowy

Are you good at drawing? a bit

What is your Hogwarts house?  Ravenclaw?

Have you ever seen the Percy Jackson movie/s? nope

Ever seen Glee? fragments

Do you like Demi Lovato? Name a song by her. not a fan

Tarzan or The Lion King? Tarzan, from Lion King I only liked Timon and Pumba and I didn’t cry when Mufasa died

Lilo & Stitch or Moana? Lilo and Stitch

Hercules or Pinocchio? Hercules

Rugrats or Powerpuff Girls? Powerpuff girls

Ever seen Pretty Little Liars? no

Baking or dancing? dancing 

Sports or shopping? shopping

Blue or yellow? yellow

Green or pink? green

Did/do you go to a public school, a private school, or homeschool? public

Do you have a secret sideblog? not anymore

If you could teleport anywhere in the world right now, where would you go? if I could teleport once I would save that ability for special occassion like emergency but if I was able to teleport whenever then hmm...

Do you have/would you get your nipples pierced? nah

How would you spend a million dollars? buy an apartment, help my parents, live better *maybe even make a movie?

What’s your pet peeve? I have so many

Do you like paper books or ebooks better? paper

If you could live in a fictional world, what world would you pick? Moomin valley

If money was no object, what would your wardrobe be like? big hahaha

If you could marry any celebrity, who would you pick? well I don’t know them personally so it’s hard to say - just choosing based on their look? hmm...

Who do you text the most? my gf

If you had to choose, which sibling would you live with? I only have a sister so... I would prefer not to live with her again, thx

When was your last date? last week

Are there any people at your job who absolutely hates you? if I had a job...

Do you prefer cool, warm or neutral colors? depends

Have you ever taken art classes? I have

Do you know how to work a cash register? I hope I didn’t forget much about it

Fact or fiction novels? fiction

Do you think you’re a clingy person? am I?

Do you enjoy kisses on the cheek? not really

How often would you say you disagree with your parents? often with my mom, rarely with my dad

Have you ever slept with your window open? nah

What color are your mother’s eyes? brown

Do you cry easily? very

Have you ever been into a court room? field trip in middle school

How many necklaces would you say you own? too many as for someone who never wear them.

What time do you plan on waking up tomorrow morning? wish I didn’t have to

Do you enjoy receiving souvenirs? buying them myself

Do a lot of people dislike you or is it the other way around? it’s both ways

What’s the worst part about school? bullying, grade stress, unhealthy eating, sitting all day long, walking there in the cold and snow during winter etc.

Would you ever consider going on a cruise? nah

Do you still act childish most of the time? often

Did you ever enjoy gym class? at times I enjoyed PE

What is your biggest insecurity? dunno which is biggest, I have plenty of them

Have you ever painted a room alone? not alone but helping

Speaking of which, when did you last paint your room? ages ago

Do you know how to garden? but don’t like to

Do you have any bad habits? shitload

How old were your parents when they had you? in their 30s

What is the most amusing thing on the internet, in your opinion? memes?

Do you try to spend a lot of time with family? compared to some people I spend lots of time with my parents

Do you need to clean your bedroom? yeah

What do you plan on doing with the rest of your life? we’ll see

Which decade were you born in? 90s

Are you good at giving advice to people? but not myself

Is there anyone out there who makes you feel completely useless? I am useless

Do you like texting or calling people more? text

Do you have a lot of friends? I don’t really have friends

Have you ever thought of someone as useless? myself for example

Can you count to ten in another language other than your own? english, polish, russian

Does photography interest you at all? kinda

Do you think you’re a good singer? am not

Do you think you have a good sense of style? I have my own style

Do you enjoy reading often? not often

Are you afraid of lifts? I prefer to take the stairs

How exactly are you feeling right now? Why do you feel the way you do? emotionally/mentally bad because of family and health issues mostly, physically my usual so not the best but can’t complain much

Has the last person you held hands with, ever told you that they love you? yes

Which do you think is the worst - saying something and then wishing you hadn’t, or not saying something and wishing you had? saying smth and wishing I hadn’t is worse to me

When was the last time you saw your grandparents? I saw my grandma almost 3 years ago

Have you ever felt really attracted to someone, but been deterred because you found out they didn’t have a very nice personality? omg more than once

Have you ever hugged/kissed someone you’d only just met? hugged, not kissed

Would you ever apologize for something that wasn’t your fault? I do that sometimes

Has anyone ever cried in your arms before? sure

Do you keep a lot of things from your parents? basically nothing

Using one word only, describe the day you’ve had so far. Sunday

Have you been annoyed at someone/something today? I still am  Are you avoiding anybody at the moment? you could say that Is rap your favorite genre of music? it’s not Have you ever lasted a relationship longer then two months? yep Is it safe to walk around your neighborhood at night? not for me Are you a fan of heights? nah but I’m not super scared of heights Rate your typing speed on a scale from 1 - 10? almost 10

Do you text more then you talk on the phone? obvi Are you scared to grow old? to get more ill

Do you use a dishwasher or wash dishes by hand? by hand, I hate dishwashers

What is the best pharmacy near you? they’re not that good 

Do you use public transportation? yup

How much does it cost for you to laundry (if you use a slot machine)? we have a washer at home

Do you make your bed every day? I’m lazy and it’s unhealthy to so I don’t

Do you save receipts? depends

Do you use re-usable bags at the grocery store? yep

Have you ever burnt yourself with the glue gun? slightly

Wall calendar or desk calendar? pocket :P 

Does your home have a basement? it does

How often do you clean? clean what?

How often do you go grocery shopping? often

Ever bought a lottery ticket? few times

Do you gamble? online for free at times

Do you ever sleep on the floor? sleepover

Which room do you stay in the most? mine

Ever worked two jobs or more at once? noooo

Do you live in an apartment, condo, house, or dorm? house

How often do you go see a doctor? too often

Do you have acid reflux? chronic

Do you snore? no

Are you on birth control? I’m asexual and into women 

Do you put on make-up in the bathroom or the bedroom? I did it wherever

What is the first site you go to when you turn on your computer? fb

Which email service do you use? wp

How often do you check your email? usually rarely

How old were you when you got your first phone? I was in middle school

Did you own a Britney Spears album? I don’t listen to Britney Spears

What sites are you on? plenty

Does the door to your room have a lock? I wish, it has a funny stuffed/plushie one What type of skin do you have? mixed Ever gotten beer poured all over yourself? luckily not, gross *from what I remember someone poured wine or beer on my shoes once in the store by breaking the bottle and didn’t pay for anything  Who’s the last person you had a sleepover with? John  Who’s the last person you wanted to kiss? my gf Can you keep a secret? not really When’s the last time you went on a walk? this evening

Do you feel uncomfortable when people you hardly know confide in you? if they use me 

Have you ever regretted what you said in drunken conversation once sober? never been in such situation

Is there anything coming up which you’re dreading? it’s complicated

Do you ever do tedious tasks just to keep your mind occupied? I have my usual things/distractions that I do everyday

Have you ever lived with somebody with truly repulsive habits? could say so?

Do you tend to say things because they’re appropriate not because you mean them?   sometimes

What was the last thing to fascinate you? smth I saw on the internet?

What was the last thing to annoy you? someone close to me

When did your hard work last pay off?   basically never

When did you last feel a need to be alone? almost always?

When did you last REALLY want to go out but couldn’t for whatever reason?   covid and my other health problems but also money

Have you ever eaten chocolate for breakfast? nooo

Do you like balloons? I do (don’t worry tho I can do without them)

When will you next go to the beach? *shrug*

If you have pet fish do you bother to name them?   if I had fish I probably would name them

Did you ever read the Terry Pratchet “Disk World” books?   I hate Pratchett

Do you keep your eggs in the fridge? of course

Have you ever owned chickens? I wanted to

Do you like classical music? at times, some songs

When did you last listen to music?   this day

[szopenhauer]

What makes you trust someone?  experiences with them if you know what I mean

Are you more likely to give advice or to ask for it? give, I ask mom about food and health sometimes or ask parents for help but usually I take care of things on my own which is both good and bad, my grandma always said we have to solve problems by ourselves but that had both good and bad consequences, I guess we should balance it 

When was the last time you felt lost, figuratively speaking? kinda now

In what ways are you emotionally strong? In what ways are you emotionally weak? it’s complicated, hard to explain even to myself, especially having alters as the same thing can impact us differently

What is the strangest book you have ever read? How did you find out about it? Robert Sheckley - Zwichrowany świat (horrible) few of Jonathan Carroll books (some I liked, some I didn’t) eventually Upiór południa. Czas mgieł [4] M. L. Kossakowska

Do you prefer to watch movies or tv alone or with other people? Is there anything you refuse to watch alone? depends, I refuse to watch last season of Stranger things alone because it’s a show I watched with my father and maybe SW too?

What was the subject of the last video you watched? grooming... I am confused and feel uneasy after that - my mind was manipulated for so long I can’t recognize when someone’s truly interested in me or when they want to use me at times, I don’t know what I want, why I feel the way I feel - is this trauma, asexuality, BPD, wanting to be nice and please others or smth completely different and would appreciate if somebody explain the difference to me in great detail as in here it was easier to recognize as those were the bosses, pedos, older human beings etc but when it comes to potential lovers, crushes - boundaries aren’t visible enough, not being ready or in the mood then saying NO feels bad because it’s like I’m guilty of pushing someone away, right? if I’m pushing those I don’t care about it’s not a problem but when I’m in love then I regret stopping them, I’m not sure of myself and my needs, don’t want to scare them off completely and that is paralising, my world turned upside down thx to that video and I’m triggered, I was kind of molested before and I thought after so many years of being a victim I am aware and conscious but lately I started a sexual relationship that is basically my first and I’m not good at analising it’s aspects, I might even be mad at family member but I will let them hug me - shouldn’t I?...

Do you feed your leftovers to your dogs? not all leftovers are safe for dogs

What tricks does your pet do? none besides going back home when I carry his meal or run to the gate when I put leash on him - he learned that himself

When you hear the name “Ginger” what do you think of? red hair or a cat... or a red cat XD but also spice?

What is the worst damage that your car has seen?   -

Have you ever peed yourself from laughing?   omg luckily not :o

Is your last name well known in your town?   oh well... it’s a small town 

Who did you last talk to in person?  parent 

On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate your own appearance? Why? oh my... don’t ask me that

Who was the last person to send you a message on Facebook? When was the last time you saw that person? my gf, several days ago

How many times have you cried over the person you love/like? uh oh 

Has the last person you held hands with, ever told you that they love you? mhm

Is there someone you used to hang out with all the time, and now you don’t anymore? Why do you think your relationship changed? ex friends, school ended?...

Is there anyone you dislike so much, that you actually can’t stand to be around them? have to be around them

When was the last time you wanted to cry, but didn’t, because you didn’t want to show that you were upset? Why? sigh...

Which do you think is worse - saying something and then wishing you hadn’t, or not saying something and wishing you had? first is worse

What are 3 things that are guaranteed to make you smile? cute dog on the street, funny meme, buying a cool item maybe?

When was the last time you saw your grandparents? years ago

Have you ever felt really attracted to someone, but been deterred because you found out they didn’t have a very nice personality? usually, I guess I’m untolerant :P

Would you ever apologize for something that wasn’t your fault? yep