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myfictionaldreams · 1 year

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Winter Soup // Mafia!Stucky x F!Reader

Summary: There was no better feeling than a bowl of hot soup when you're feeling unwell and, what's even better is when it's delivered to your door every day by your new guard. It tasted amazing and you could always trust everyone in the Mafia... right?

Requested by: @senjoritanana thank you so much, I hope you enjoy all the angst!

A/N: PSA I don't know the specifics of how poisons work and didn't want to risk it on my google history lmao so please ignore any inaccuracies. Please read the tags if you're affected by near death experiences, please proceed with caution and if I've missed any tags/warnings, please let me know!

Warnings/Tags: 18+ readers only, hints of smut, angst (LOTS BUCKLE UP), fluff, polyamory relationship, poisoning, blood and injury, anxiety, crying, begging, near death expierences, reader is injured, pain, emotional hurt/comfort, hospitalization, protective Steve Bucky and Sam, everyone needs a hug tbh

Words: 7.7k

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The warmer months were slowly starting to shift into winter and for some reason this year, the weather change was beginning to affect your health. You’d heard of the phrase ‘seasonal depression’ but you were convinced that it was due to the cooler weather that was making you feel this rubbish.

It had been happening for a week now, and some days you’d feel fine, normal in fact but then others your chest felt so tight as if an elephant was sitting on top of you, nausea, vertigo and heart palpations that would have you clutching your chest with fear you might explode. With each passing day, you would be praying for the summer months to return, especially as the snow and ice increased with intensity outside of your home.

You were fine for the most part, good days and bad; yes you might be getting worse with each passing day but you were adamant that the seasonal illness would pass. However, the frosty weather was also a minor blessing because it was your excuse to stay home and be a pretty housewife for Steve and Bucky. Being able to stay home made it easier to keep the illness to yourself as well, it was a busy time within the Rogers mafia and you didn’t need them wasting their time fretting over your wellness when they had a lot of other things to do. They had many international deals that were so close to being signed for and contracted that every waking hour was spent at the office, on phone calls, and emails, trying to talk to locals across the world to attend meetings on their behalf so the boys were thoroughly busy.

There were a few occasions you’d attended with them to the office if you were feeling particularly needy or lonely but it unnerved you to drive on the snow and ice so when you suggested that you might stay at home, Steve and Bucky offered no complaints.

At home at least you were able to mop about, trying to perk yourself up with movies, pyjamas and your favourite bowl of warm soup. Over the last few months, you’d been trying to improve your cooking skills, especially to impress Steve who usually cooked for three of you. This became more interesting as the colder months drew in over Brooklyn as this meant you could cook more homely, hearty foods such as soups and stews, especially as you had recipe suggestions from the newly hired grounds guard Rafael.

He’d been recommended by a friend of a friend for Steve to hire which was perfect timing because the last grounds guard had retired. There were a few occasions when he was the guard to bring the post to the front door from the front gate and you soon found he was enthusiastic and easy to talk to, even though he was a little bit older, which was how you found out he had previously been a chef and offered to give you recipe ideas. As winter drew in, Rafael began turning up when he knew you were by yourself to deliver some of his momma’s family recipe soups, hoping that the meal would perk you up which it did, they tasted so delicious that you were secretly hoping he would keep bringing them to you, especially as you continued to feel unwell.

“What is it today?”, you asked voice full of hope and trying to sound as upbeat as possible. Even though you were desperately holding onto the door handle as your head was spinning and scared you’d fall over.

“Potato and leek soup and they’re all grown in my back yard so hopefully you’ll love it even more than usual”, Rafael smiled as he handed over the container, his smile broad and causing the aged creases at the corner of his eyes to deepen.

Gleefully you accepted the soup, opening the lid slightly to smell the delicious meal, your stomach grumbling with hunger. Your appetite had reduced significantly over the last few days due to always feeling nauseous however it seemed the only thing that you could stomach was his delicious meals and therefore his arrival was always welcomed.

“Thank you so much! Please will you let me pay you this time? You’re being way too kind to me, always giving me free meals, you’re going above and beyond a usual guard”, you pleaded whilst also having to return holding onto the door handle as it felt like the ground was moving with your dizziness.

Rafael held up his hands and shook his head, taking a step back, “Absolutely not! Just wanted to give you something to make you feel better and make the fairies go away”.

The guard halted, a look of embarrassment passing out his features as he realised what he just said, especially as you asked, “Fairies?”

He awkwardly looked down at his shoes, rubbing the back of his neck as he tried to explain, “Yeah it’s just something my momma use to say. If we were feeling unwell, it’s because the fairies had crept into our stomachs and were being naughty and making us ill and now I’ve said it out loud to another person I’ve realised how insane that sounds so I’m going to stop talking”.

You squeezed your lips together to try and contain your laughter but that lasted a moment before you were both laughing which only turned into you losing your balance against the door and swaying to keep yourself upright. The laughter died in Rafael’s eyes as he reached out to you, “Woah, you ok, Ma’am?”

Quickly brushing him off, you took a step back into your home, trying to ask nonchalantly about the situation, “Yeah sorry, probably just the fairies pushing me over”. Your joke didn’t seem to comfort him in any way as he continued to look uneased by your appearance.

Thankfully Rafael didn’t push the situation any further, seeing that you wanted to escape back into the comfort of your home, he took his step back with a simple smile. “Get back inside before you catch another cold from this snow. Eat the soup whilst it’s still warm and I’ll be back tomorrow to hear the verdict on the taste.”

“Thank you Rafael! Enjoy the rest of your day!”. You waved him off and rushed to slam the door, sliding down to the floor against the wood, losing all energy that you’d built that morning just for that one conversation. Ok yes, you were feeling sorry for yourself as you tried to catch your breath, heart pounding violently in your chest that it also echoed in your ears and your vision was still seeing double of everything.

However your stomach continued to gurgle with hunger so without wasting any more energy, you opened the lid and ate the entire contents then and there. Releasing a satisfied sigh at the delicious meal, you took another couple of minutes to gather your senses before dragging yourself over to the living room, collapsing onto your back on the couch and letting sleep take you into a dreamless realm.

A violent shake of your shoulders by a hard grip on your shoulder was what startled you awake as Sam’s voice then surrounded you as he shouted, “Hey! Wake up!”.

“I think this is the first time I’ve ever been close to hating you Sam Wilson”, you croaked before coughs shattered your chest, rocking your body as you tried to sit up and suck in any air between the painful coughs. Finally, you calmed down enough to collapse back against the decorative cushions of the couch and open your eyes to look at the three Sam’s that hovered over you. After a couple more blinks, they merged into one, very distressed-looking bodyguard, eyebrows knitted together and jaw muscle clenched harshly.

Sam reached towards your face, pressing against your cheek in concern, “Why didn’t you tell me you were ill?”

“What? I’m not ill, I’m just tired, can’t a girl nap around here?” you questioned with a raised eyebrow, trying to look as relaxed as possible.

The man didn’t look convinced as he sat on the edge of the couch next to you. Releasing a heavy sigh which only twinged something in your chest that made you want to cough but you refrained from doing so as you emphasised, “Sam seriously, I’m fine”.

Sam gave you another serious glance, eyes hardening as he explained, “You didn’t sound fine, you were wheezing so hard in your sleep I thought you were going to stop breathing”.

There was no denying the panic that filled your heart and would explain the tightened feeling in your chest but you tried to not let the fear show on your face as you rolled your eyes, reaching for his hand and squeezing it.

“I appreciate your concern Sam, but I feel ok, I’m just tired, I was probably just sleeping in a weird position and look, no wheeze now!” Taking a deep breath to show there was no more noise coming from your chest, however, it didn’t seem to comfort him in any way.

“Yeah well you’re still looking peaky and why are you so tired all the time recently, you’re never usually like this”.

“It’s probably just the cold weather or something. If I start to feel unwell, you know I’d tell you. I’m a big baby when I’m ill, you’ll be the first to know”. Sam looked to be contemplating believing you and all you were silently begging for was that he didn’t call Steve and Bucky, they just didn’t need this stress right now. Even though it was in his contract to call them at any sign of injury or illness but as Sam looked at you, other than looking tired, you seemed to be fine and still joking with him. Finally, he gave you a simple nod and you couldn't hold back the thankful sigh. “Do you mind if I go back to sleep for a little while longer or do you need me for anything?”

“You’ve been sleeping a lot recently”, he stated his earlier point again.

“What, so I’m not allowed to nap now?” you teased him with a subtle smile, hoping to crack his worried exterior. It only half worked as he shook his head to himself, standing up and pulling the fluffy blanket that had been left behind you on the couch and throwing it over your body. Before you could even thank him though, sleep had stolen you back into its resting state.

Sleeping for a few more hours, Sam was nowhere to be seen but he usually liked to check the perimeter ever so often and speak to the other guards so you weren’t worried about his whereabouts. As you shuffled to the kitchen, you couldn’t tell if you felt any worse or better after all the sleeping, haven’t wasted another day feeling sorry for yourself, you tried to snap out of it by glancing through the refrigerator and cupboards and deciding to ssurpriseSteve and Bucky with a romantic meal.

The house was soon filled with delicious scents of sweet and savoury as you’d baked and were in the process of cooking their dinner. You were in your own little world and had only stumbled a handful of times with dizziness and the headache that was building was currently mild in comparison to others you had, it was fine you determined to yourself

Still lost in your own thoughts, you hadn’t even heard the front door open as you were suddenly enveloped by a muscular chest and arms, a smile aching your cheeks as you nuzzled back into Steve’s body. His lips danced over your cheek and down your neck as he held you close, the roughness of his beard comforting. “I didn’t hear you come in”, you commented, turning your head slightly to chase after his lips, sighing deeply in your chest as he held you tighter for a second, hands dipping beneath your shirt at your waist so that he could feel the warmth of your skin.

“I did shout”, he revealed whilst moving back to neck, not to kiss but just to smell you in, his body almost melting into the floor as he felt at home with the familiar scents. “I’ve missed you”, he whispered against your skin.

Goosebumps instantly flooded over your body as you shivered, turning in his arms to hug him properly, your fingers scratching through his hair that was beginning to curl at the ends where he’d allowed it to grow out over the winter months. “I’ve missed you too”, you whispered against his lips, lazily kissing and breathing each other in.

“Come with us tomorrow, I want you to be near me”, he admits with words that were making you cling to him harder.

You wanted to say yes and the word was on the tip of your tongue but then your thoughts drifted to the soup coming. “I’ve got a delivery coming that I can’t miss, I’m sorry”.

“The guards can get the delivery”, he counters.

“It’s fresh soup I want it whilst it’s hot”, an embarrassed smile finds its way to your lips as he leans his forehead against yours, his eyes closed as he just enjoyed the moment of the two of you being together.

“Soup? But we could order that to the office if you wanted it, you know that’s no issue”.

You pout dramatically, hanging off his neck as you whisper with a childish tone, “But it won’t be the soup that I’ve ordered and want”.

Steve rolls his eyes but you know he's being playful, he could never find a reason to be upset with you. Rolling back his shoulders, he stands back to his full height, opening his eyes to cup your cheek with his massive hand but this was when he took you in and a frown dawned on his face just like it had on Sam’s. “Are you feeling ok?” The hand on your cheek moved towards your forehead, expecting to feel a temperature but it felt normal.

“I feel great”, you say with as much cheer in your tone as possible, still holding onto his neck but mostly because another wave of dizziness had rushed through you and you needed some support to stay standing.

Steve didn’t seem convinced, “You just … look a little off”.

You playfully rolled your eyes, similar to how he had just done, “Wow thanks Steve”.

“You know I didn’t mean it like that”.

“I know, I’m joking, I’m fine - really, it's nothing to worry about”. He eyes you and doesn’t fall for your grin so you tried your next trick up your sleeve. Leaning on your tip toes whilst pulling his face closer, you whispered against his lips, “I love you, Stevie”.

The tension momentarily eased from his shoulders as his grip around you tightened, “I love you too”.

“Sorry to interrupt your love fest but I want my own loving”, Bucky broadly announced from the entrance of the kitchen where he was leaning against the wall with his arms crossed, a twinkle of mischief in his blue eyes however as you pulled back from Steve and he could finally see your face, the happiness seeped from his face. “Woah, what happened? Are you ok?”

You gave a frustrated huff, finally releasing Steve’s neck as you pointed in the direction of the decorated table. “Right, both of you go and sit down before I decide you don’t deserve any food for being mean”.

Steve shuffled away first as you continued to cook the food, Bucky looking ashamed as he came over and kissed your cheek but before he could pull away, you quickly captured his lips in a kiss to show you’d been playing before and weren’t upset.

“Why are there only two plates on the table?” Steve questioned as he took a seat.

Without looking over your shoulder at him, you casually answered, “I’ve already had mine, I wasn’t sure when you were both going to be home and I didn’t want to wait”. They both seemed to accept your lie and you happily sat with them as they ate, asking about how the deals were going. They both seemed to be agreed that they were sure to have contracts signed tomorrow and had even been able to pay off some of the international police so that shipping of the goods could occur. In truth, after the soup, you were not feeling at all remotely hungry and even the smell of the cooked food had turned your stomach over.

A couple of hours later, the three of you were preparing for bed. Steve is in the middle and you are to his right and Bucky is to his left. You and the mafia boss had been kissing deeply for a couple of minutes, his hands beneath your shirt, brushing against your breasts, rough fingertips peaking your nipples as you ground down on his thigh. You were soaked and he could feel the evidence of it as you weren’t wearing any underwear but the longer the touches and kisses went on for, the more you were feeling unwell.

As his teeth tugged on your bottom lip and he began to trail open-mouthed kisses over your jaw and down your throat, you noticed Bucky was doing the same thing but to Steve’s neck from behind. However, there were two Bucky’s instead of one as your vision swayed and it felt as if you were on a water bed with how unsteady you felt. The headache was close to a full-blown migraine as well now which only continued to make you feel nauseous so even though there was nothing more you wanted than to continue where this intimacy was leading but, for once, you had to stop it.

“Wait, just- just one moment”, you pushed against Steve's shoulders at the same time. The blonde's hold on you loosened as he moved his face back to look into your eyes but you’d closed them, trying to hide your face from him and Bucky who had also sat up further to check on you. “I just- sorry I’m tired and I… I’m not sure- sorry.. I don’t think-”.

Steve’s fingers tipped your chin up to look at him as he smiled softly down at you, “If you don’t want to do anything, we don’t have to. If you’re tired then I’ll just hold you close, ok? Please don’t apologise for not wanting any of this”.

You relaxed in his arms, feeling grateful for him but also bad that you could feel how aroused he was against your stomach. “Thank you. I’m just feeling so tired today. Please don’t let me stop you both, continue without me, I just want to go to sleep”.

“You don’t have to give us reasons why you don’t want to do it, baby, we’ll do whatever you want to do. Me and Buck don’t have to fuck if you want to be held, I don’t want you thinking we’re neglecting you”.

Affection and love warmed your heart as you kissed Steve’s lips and then reached over his shoulder to kiss Bucky. “I love you both but seriously please continue, I like watching you both anyway so that’ll satisfy me enough if I’m not asleep by that point anyway”.

They both gave their love back to you with praises and pecks to your face before rolling away from you and beginning their exploration of each other's bodies. You watched with a smile on your face for a couple of moments and your core ached with need but as a burst of pain pounded through your temple, your eyes shut automatically to help ease the pain and from there, they never opened again as sleep took you soon after.

The next morning, your migraine had gone but your entire body felt weak and drained of any energy. Steve and Bucky took one look at you and determined that they’d be working from home, wishing to remain near you but they still needed the comfort of their home office upstairs whereas you remained downstairs, pretending to watch TV.

Somehow, you had continued to hide your seasonal illness, they just thought you still looked peaky. Today was the worst you’d felt so far, even having to use the wall as support whilst walking around the home, silently coughing into cushions so that the boys wouldn’t hear upstairs and this only increased the sharp pain shooting through your chest.

At lunchtime, Sam came over to visit and found you at the table in the kitchen, head lying against the table top as you dipped in and out of sleep. You were too tired to even pretend to joke and thankfully for once he didn’t pester you with being unwell, especially knowing Steve and Bucky were home, he assumed they had seen how bad you were so he just sat next to you at the table, easing his hand under your head so you had some comfort against the hard surface.

Soon after, Rafael knocked on the front door with your soup delivery. Usually h,e would stay at the door, never coming into your home but Sam insisted that he come out of the cold and deliver the soup to you in person.

“Yay!” you croaked, reaching out for the warm container, seeing the soup within and seeing that it was a deep red colour today, possibly tomato.

“I didn’t know you cooked, Rafael”, Sam noted, taking his seat next to yours once more as the new guard stayed standing at the head of the table. Other than Natasha, Sam was the lead of the security and guards and technically Rafael’s boss.

“Oh yeah, he used to be a chef”, you explained to Sam, whilst opening the lid of the container, smelling the delicious food and confirming your theory that it was tomato soup.

“Chef? I didn’t know you worked as a chef”, Sam remarked with a frown, eyeing Rafael with confusion as he’d been the one to complete the job interview and didn’t remember seeing chef on his CV.

Rafael casually shrugged his shoulders, looking somewhat tense at the questioning but still forced a smile to his face to please his boss. “I didn’t think it was relevant to the job, to be honest”.

“We’ll have to get you on the bbq when the weather perks up, maybe that’ll stop the arguments between Steve and Bucky”, Sam mused over the thought.

You tried to chuckle but the exhaustion had you slumping against the table as you mumbled, “I feel like shit”.

Sam tensed next to you, “Maybe we should call a doctor. You know, I’m surprised Steve and Bucky aren’t down here right now looking after you, do they even know how bad you’re feeling today?”

“Wait, they’re both here?” Rafael asked Sam but he ignored him, his focus solely on you.

Once again you’re too tired to think of an answer and shrug your shoulders, turning your head to look up at Rafael, “I think the fairies like me too much”.

“Fairies?”, Sam questions thinking that you’d become delirious.

You smile genuinely to Sam, reaching to tap his shoulder, “Inside joke Sam, keep up”.

There was no further discussion of fairies as more hacking coughs ripped through you. It took a couple of moments and Sam rushed to get you a glass of water before you slumped back against the table in exhaustion.

“Why don’t you have the soup and then see how you’re feeling later? Maybe the rest is all you need”, Rafael suggested, filling the silence with his voice.

You couldn’t see it but Sam gave his employee a scathing look, “Rest is all she’s been doing. I’m calling the doc and then I’m going upstairs to tell Steve and Bucky”.

“Aren’t they busy?” Rafael continued to question Sam. “I’ve heard they’ve got that deal coming up from Italy and France, they might appreciate it if you wait a little bit before calling Doctors”.

Sam’s voice was quiet and stern but you were too tired to notice. “That’s not common knowledge, how do you know that?”.

Massaging your temples with the pounding thuds that hadn’t stopped since your coughing fit, you decided that Rafael was right, usually sleep made you feel better. Reaching for the soup one more, you opened the container as you addressed your bodyguard, “he’s right Sam. I just need today for all the work stuff to be over and then I’ll call the doctor. The boys don’t need any distractions, especially today, one more day isn’t going to kill me”.

Sam didn’t look happy as you began to idly sip on the thick, delicious soup. As you thanked Rafael for the meal, Sam finally looked back to him, his frown deep and unmoving as he asked, “Don’t you have work to do?”

Rafael’s spine straightened, “Oh yeah, right. Sorry, sir” and with that, he left to return to work.

“You don’t have to be so bossy you know, he’s just trying to help”, you tried to reason with Sam.

However, your friend ignored you and moved to hold your hand to pull your attention away from the meal and towards him. “I’m giving you until the evening, wait no- if you get any worse before the evening, I am calling the Doc, no arguments, understand?”

“Yes sir”, you say with a little salute.

Finishing your soup, your boyfriends finally came downstairs and you attempted to straighten your posture and plaster a fake smile on your face. Bucky paused in the entryway, sniffing the air and asking, “What’s that smell, I know it's from somewhere but can’t put my finger on it”.

“Is it my soup?” you say, trying to stand up and act like the floor was spinning beneath you.

“No, it’s not that”, he pondered, still looking around and trying to smell whatever he recognised but couldn’t pick it up again. Steve and Bucky both walked past you, kissing the back of your head as you casually explained that you were going to lie down for a little bit. “Wait, let me come with you-”, Bucky started but you held out your hand to stop him.

“You’ve got a busy time at work and I’ve got Sammy boy here anyway so you two continue with your work and we’ll have a nice evening in, Ok?”

“Yes Ma’am”, he mutters before continuing to make his lunch. It wasn’t often that he listened to your instructions but both men were so busy and overwhelmed with work and the consequences that could come from it all that they were all over the place.

The next hour passed by slowly and you didn’t manage to sleep even for a moment because your symptoms were making you feel so awful. You were wheezing so bad that each breath felt like you were suffocating, your eyes began to roll with how much the room was spinning and a violent tremble rocked through your entire body, you didn’t feel right, something was wrong and it was beginning to scare you.

“Sam?” your voice was nothing more than a rasping whisper but he still was able to hear you from where he had been on the phone with the doctor from across the room, having noticed your deterioration in health. He was kneeling by your side in a couple of broad steps, the phone balancing between his cheek and shoulder as he rested a hand on your temple, feeling your spiked temperature. “I don’t feel good”, you admitted, voice full of terror before more coughs ruptured through your chest, leaving you struggling to breathe.

“Steve! Bucky get down here right now!”

“No… no, I just need to sleep”, the fear had disappeared from your voice as you wished for the exhaustion to take you completely, hoping that in sleep you wouldn't feel the pain destroying your insides.

“Hey! No! Don’t go t sleep, need you to stay awake for me, Doctor Banner is on his way but you can’t go to sleep”, Sam urgently tapped your face, rousing you from the sleep as Bucky had all but jumped down the entire flight of stairs at the shouting.

“What’s going on- What the fuck? Doll?” he replaced where Sam was so that he could continue to explain to the doctor what was happening.

“I’m just not feeling ok, it’s fine Bucky go back to work”, you were somewhat delirious, still not really opening your eyes but leaning into the coldness from Bucky’s hand as he cupped your face. Bucky looked to Sam for answers, his eyes bright and alert with fury and worry.

When Sam shrugged his shoulders, not having any answer as to why you were suddenly so unwell, Bucky quickly turned back to you and assessed your deteriorating health and noticed just how laboured your breathing had become. As he spoke, it was with surprising gentleness but still held authority, “I need you to take a deep breath for me, honey, I want you to try and fill your lungs with air”.

“I’m trying, it’s just seasonal illness, it’ll be ok”.

“What are you talking about?” Bucky asks, not letting go of your face but just moving in closer.

“It’s just seasonal”, your words began to slur as you became incoherent.

Steve finally descended the stairs with just as much purpose as Bucky as he demanded to know what was going on but Bucky couldn’t answer him as he continued to talk to you and keep you awake. “It’s not seasonal, you’re not breathing properly, it’s not-”. Bucky was leaning so close that he was able to smell your breath and he froze, it looked like he now wasn’t even breathing.

“What is it Bucky?” Steve demanded, kneeling next to him and reaching over to take your hand but also feel your pulse, which only made his own increase with worry.

Bucky leans closer and smells your mouth again, so close that you tried to move away as his nose nudged your lips. “What did you eat?” Bucky asked in a tone that forced your eyes to open with concern.

“Huh? Um just my soup”, you say whilst blinking quickly as he still wouldn’t come into focus.

“Soup? Where is it? Where’s the container?” before you could answer, he was on his feet and running into the kitchen as Steve continued to demand answers from his boyfriend, his hand now moving from your wrist to directly over your heart, continuing to count the beats.

Bucky cursed so violently that it actually made you shrink into the cushions but the movement only made you cough more and chest tighten as you struggled to breathe. He returned to the room, his face a deathly white and green shade as he uttered just one word: “Hemlock”.

There was just one brief second where not a body in the room breathed or even moved, one single second to process the poison that Bucky had spoken, the planet that he only knew about because of his time as the Winter Soldier and using it on his target. The poison that he could now smell on your breath, that originated from your container of soup.

It was Sam to speak first, Sam to snap the two men out of their frozen states as he gave the orders from Doctor Banner who had heard the word over the phone. “We need to get her to a hospital right now”.

Steve picked you up, and his entire body began to tremble with adrenaline and fear as no one even stopped to properly dress for the snow outside, only putting their shoes on before rushing to the car. Sam thankfully was able to use the adrenaline to remain headstrong as he climbed into the driver’s side of the car so that Steve and Bucky could both hold you in the back seats and try and keep you awake.

You were lying with your head in Steve’s lap with your body lying across Bucky’s as they clamped their arms around you as makeshift seatbelts. You had heard the word that Bucky had said and even though you knew what it was, you didn’t want to believe it, even as you continued to feel worse. “It’s not poison, it’s just soup”.

However, those words triggered something within your throat and once more you were coughing so hard that you thought you were going to vomit and cringed as metallic warmth filled your mouth and leaked out of the corner of your lips.

You slumped onto Steve and Bucky, head lulling back but Steve was quick to grab your face, tapping it and forcing you to stay awake, “Baby don’t go to sleep! Please stay awake for me! Stay with us, we’ll be at the hospital soon, I promise”.

You were scared, even though you were half-conscious, you were terrified now realising the severity of the situation, knowing that you were coughing up blood which was now soaking the front of Steve’s shirt and hearing how panicked your boyfriends were only made it worse. Through all the scary, dangerous times in your life, they always remained calm and in control but now they were both frantic and frightened.

As all three men continued to plead with you to stay awake, you forced yourself to open your eyes, only allowing yourself the luxury of blinking occasionally as you kept looking into Steve’s ocean-blue eyes. With his body and face so close to yours, you used him to ground you in the situation, trying to copy his breathing which had slowed since you’d opened your eyes; ignoring the pain from the breaths and resisting the urges to cough even though blood continued to fill your mouth.

“Am I going to die?” you whisper, not being able to ignore the questions now in the back of your mind anymore.

Steve’s breath hitched for a second before he tried to confidently whisper, “No, you’re not going to die”.

You didn’t believe him, especially as the trip to the hospital was delayed by the snow, every second feeling like it could be your worse, you didn’t want it to end like this.

“I love you.”

“You’re going to be ok, just keep looking at Steve, keep breathing”, Bucky pleaded, squeezing your freezing cold hand.

“Please, just say it back”, your voice was hardly audible anymore as your mouth was so full of blood.

“Stop talking and save your energy for when you’re feeling better”, Bucky tried to keep his composure but you knew he was close to snapping.

Your breaths were wet and laboured, wheezing so violently it rattled and echoed around the car but you still managed to plead, “Say it back-”.

“I love you, I love you so fucking much, please don’t leave me, baby”. Steve snapped first, his eyes were wide, fearful and yet beautiful with how stark the blue was as his eyes filled with tears, leaking down his cheek and into his beard.

You were thankful, for both of them, for everything and you wish you could have told them, wishing that you could have heard Bucky’s own declaration of love and adoration for you but the pounding of your heartbeat became so loud in your head that you couldn’t hear anything anymore.

But you continued to hold on, never once looking away from those pretty eyes of Steve’s as Sam finally screeched to a halt outside of the hospital. Once more, Steve carried you and there was a flurry of people in different coloured scrubs suddenly surrounding you as you were placed onto a cold bed.

One moment you were staring into Steve’s eyes and the next you were looking up at a stranger and the comfort you’d once felt, the thing that was grounding you to life was now gone and you couldn’t find him again, no matter how much you moved on the bed, even as the strangers poked and prodded at your body until you couldn’t deal with it anymore and finally closed your eyes.

Do you ever have those naps where you wake up and forget where you are, or what time or day it is? That was currently how you felt except the added sensation of floating encompassed your body as well. The only sort of normality felt throughout your body was a cool feminine hand stroking across your temple in a soothing, repetitive manner.

Your toes wiggled firstly and then your eyes behind your eyelids and even though you knew who was stroking your forehead, you still croakily asked, “Steve? Bucky?”

“It’s just me Sugar” Natasha sounded calm and peaceful as her fingers didn’t stop with their soothing motions. “The boys are going to be so pissed that you’re awake before they’ve got back”.

You huff and dared to open your eyes, grunting at the brightness of the room but thankfully your eyes adjusted and only one, still, Natasha smiled down at you. Seeing that you weren’t going to vomit or freak out, Natasha sat back in her chair, moving to hold onto your hand to give you some comfort. “You gave us a real scare”.

You thought back to everything that happened, some of it was a blur but most of it still played through your mind like a horror movie that you couldn’t look away from or escape. “Was I really poisoned?”

There was one thing that you appreciated about Natasha and that was her blunt honesty, not one to ever sugarcoat her words, “You were”.

“But… But how? I mean… the soup, Rafael, he wouldn’t-”. You stopped yourself talking, trying to envision all the interactions you’d had with him but only one thing repeated through your thoughts: Don’t trust anyone. That was one of the first rules Steve had taught you. “I don’t understand why? He seemed so nice to me, is his name even Rafael? Was everything a lie?”

“That’s what they’re just finding out. Apparently, the friend of a friend rouse was made up including his credentials, usually, our background checks are very thorough but he had some help to slip through the cracks”.

“Do you know what help he had? Who it was, I mean?”

Natasha for once seemed to think before she spoke which unnerved you, knowing that whoever’s name she spoke next wouldn’t be good news.

The monitor displaying your heartbeat began to beep as it increased with the dread that was settling through your body.

“All signs are currently pointing to Pierce”.

Your eyes closed as you tried to remember how to breathe. You knew about Alexander Pierce. Everyone did. He was ruthless and had plenty of finances and power to pay for his success but not only this, he had been one of the top employees of Hydra and usually in charge of the Winter Soldier. So yes, you all knew a lot about Alexander Pierce and his name was one to send fear through any of those involved in the Rogers mafia, even Steve.

As you opened your eyes again to look at Natasha, you could tell she wanted to tell you more but was holding the information to not panic you further but you needed to know. “Please just tell me whatever it is you’re not telling me”.

“We think he paid this guy to come and spy on Steve and Bbucky and it seems he put his sights on you. Specifically.. Because you’re their biggest weakness and it seemed like everyone knows that”.

Your face warmed with fear and anger, as fear prickled the corner of your eyes, “So what, now I’m not even safe in my own home?”

“That’s not-” Tasha began to lean forward in her seat but another voice cut her off.

“No, you weren’t safe in your own home”. Steve stood at your hospital room door, dressed casually in a black shirt and jeans, looking nothing out of the ordinary but his face was wrath of calm and anger. Your eyes snapped from him to Bucky who had looked just as serious but as your eyes connected with his, the hard lines of his face smoothed out into a weak smile.

The two of them step into the room as Natasha stands, informing everyone that she’d give us some space and guard the door.

You’re trying desperately to keep the tears at bay, to keep them from slipping and cascading down your cheeks, not wanting your boyfriends to feel any more guilt but as you took a deep breath in, a sob erupts through you and you can’t keep the emotions back anymore.

You attempted to hide your face with your hands, even with the added difficulty of having tubes and wires attached to the backs of your hands and the tips of your fingers. The realities of everything that had happened began to destroy any hope that you had. You’d nearly died, in your own home where you were supposed to be most safe.

Steve and Bucky sat on either side of your hospital bed, moving silently as they always did and with careful ease, gently took a hand each and pried them away from your face, stroking away any tears that continued to escape.

“I’m sorry, I just- I don’t know… It’s a lot”, you tried to give reason for your crying, even though it was unnecessary. Bucky tilted your face towards him, his voice was so soft and caring that it nearly made you sob with how careful he was being with you, “Don’t apologise for crying, I tell you this all the time, Doll”.

You offered him a wet giggle, taking a few deep breaths before rambling on with your anxiety, “I bet I look like a right mess right now, I don’t even know how long I’ve been asleep for”.

They let you calm yourself down before Steve praises with his low captivating voice, “You always look beautiful, no matter how much snot is on your face”. He smiles as he manages to make you laugh before he turned serious, “It’s been 5 days, baby”.

Your face drops, “5… I’ve been asleep for 5 days?!”

“You passed out when we arrived and when they could finally stop the bleeding you-”

“Bleeding?” you questioned, remembering you were bleeding from the mouth but it didn’t seem like that much.

“The poison you’d ingested that day was a higher dose and caused internal bleeding. After they were able to stabilise you, they needed to detox you from the poison and make sure your body was healing so it was safe to keep you asleep”.

You tried to process everything that Steve had told you, it felt confusing for you to have been through so much and yet feel such little pain in your body.

As if reading your mind, Bucky once again captivated your attention as he asked, “How are you feeling? Are you in pain?”

“No I’m not in any pain but I feel wrong like my body is floating in the water or something”.

“That might be due to the medications that they’ve got you on, they’re pretty strong Sweetheart”, his pet name helped to calm your disorientated mind, clinging on to the familiarity and focusing on the way both of their hands were holding yours and stroking tiny circles in your skin,

“Did you get the answers you wanted, from Rafael, or whatever his name is”.

Steve and Bucky shared a glance between each other but Steve decided to be the one to answer. “We got the answers, it was as Nat was explaining. Pierce wanted someone in the gang, spying and getting as close to us as possible and I guess they somehow managed to weasel their way in and tried to succeed with their plan to hit our weak spot”.

You took a deep breath to try and reduce the rising anxiety in the pit of your stomach before asking tentatively, “So what happens now? With Pierce I mean.”

“That’s a problem for another time, just need you to get better first”, Bucky interjected, lifting your hand to kiss the few fingers that were attached with clips or wires.

You tried to smile at him, wanting him to know how much you appreciate him but the feeling never met your eyes and this seemed to twist something in Steve and Bucky. Both of their demeanours changed, no longer were you looking at just your boyfriends but also the mafia boss and his second in command, mixing business with family.

Bucky began talking first, tone strong and husky, “This isn’t something we are taking likely. Sam’s already spent the last day and a half revisiting everyone’s past, making sure there are no other moles that have slipped through the cracks. No new faces are allowed anywhere near our home or you.”

As he spoke, you managed sure to nod your head and try to squeeze his hand in understanding. Steve shifted in his chair, capturing your attention as he continued the discussion. “You are safe and you should have been safe but we let you down, you were vulnerable when we weren’t there to protect you like we promised we would. We let you down, we broke our promise, we could understand if you didn’t want-”.

“Whatever you’re about to say you better forget about it right now”, you say sternly, heartbeat beginning to race on the monitor again as Steve’s mouth shut quickly with a snap. “The idea of being your weakness has always frightened me but, I could also be your greatest strength. I mean - Look at what you’ve been going just to protect the house, to protect me. I know you feel like you’ve let me down but I don’t feel let down in any way. Yes, of course, what’s happened is scary, especially in our home but I doubt it’ll ever happen again. They can try and tear us apart, they can try, but they won’t break us, they can’t break us. We have to remain on top ok? I always feel safe and trusted when I’,m with you both so please, don’t ever feel like I'm not because I am. I’ll always love you both, I’m not going anywhere”.

You sucked in air greedily after your short speech, the building emotions spilling freely everything you truly believed to the men beside you, not wishing for them to ever feel doubt for the relationship or how you felt.

Looking between them both, your heart sank as you noticed Bucky quickly wipe the corner of his eye. “I thought you said no more tears”, you spoke softly whilst trying to wipe away a stray tear.

“That’s before you decided to swoon me with your speech”, he quipped back, the light returning to his eyes once more as you laughed.

“I love you Bucky”.

“I love you, Doll”, standing from his chair, his metal hand stroked over the side of your face as he captured your lips with his, lingering for a few beautiful seconds before sitting back down.

Steve had lifted your hand during your speech and was kissing your palm and you reached out to stroke his beard, “I love you, Steve”.

He too stood, just as Bucky had but he kissed your forehead first, breathing you in for a moment before doing the same against your lips. “I love you too, so much baby”.

As Steve sat back down, your eyes began to feel heavy, all of the strong emotions exhausted you completely. “Will you both be here when I wake up? Not that I’m complaining about Natasha but she doesn’t spoon me like you both do”.

They both chuckle under their breath before Steve promises, “We aren’t going anywhere, sleep, Sweetheart”.

#stucky x reader #stucky smut #steve rogers smut #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers #stucky #bucky x reader #bucky smut #bucky #bucky barnes #marvel smut #mafia au #mafia stucky #mine*

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cutielando · 2 days

Text

domestic | c.s.

synopsis: in which you build a life together with the love of your life

my masterlist

The sun was shining brightly through the open windows, the sunrays illuminating the busy room and casting a warmth over everyone inside.

Everyone was running around, trying to finish the last touches before the moment finally came. Putting a few more bobby pins into your hair, adding some last touches to your make-up, smoothing over any creases that might have appeared on your gown.

The air and atmosphere was tense, everybody scrambling to make sure everything was perfect for your big day.

Your wedding day.

You didn’t remember ever feeling as nervous as you did in those moments while getting ready. Not even when you found out you were pregnant with Rafael, not even when you have birth to him could you remember having such nerves.

Yours and Carlos’ mother were standing in the corner of your room, silently dabbing their eyes with tissues as they observed you. Reyes was crying and sniffling as she took you in, the woman that had made her completely at ease that her son was in very good hands in the future. The woman that had gifted the family the most precious little boy, The woman who loved her son more than life itself.

All the while, your mother couldn’t believe her little girl was so grown up. It seemed like yesterday you had brought Carlos home to meet your parents, and now you were marrying him with little Rafa next to you guys.

Where had the time flown by?

Your maids of honor, the beloved wags of the paddock and your childhood friends, were making sure everything was ready, checking you from head to toe and insisting that you just stand still a little while longer for some final touches.

They were probably more stressed out than you were, taking their roles so very seriously as well.

And lastly, there you were, sitting on the chair and smiling at the people hurrying around you, locking eyes with your mother and mother-in-law as you desperately tried to hold back tears. Mostly in fear that Kika or Alex would absolutely kill you for ruining your make-up.

You couldn’t quite believe your eyes as you stared at yourself in the mirror, seeing yourself all glammed up, feeling the fabric of your wedding gown underneath your fingers, admiring every single detail on the embroidered corset.

You had been dreaming about this moment ever since you met Carlos all those years ago. Walking down the aisle with your father by your side, seeing Carlos waiting for you at the altar with your little boy by his side, surrounded by your family and closest friends.

Nothing could compare to the feeling of knowing that in just a short while, you’re going to be married to the man of your dreams, solidifying your life together and continuing to grow your little family.

The sound of a door opening made you snap out of your little daydream and look behind you, smiling instantly when you saw Rafael standing in the middle of the room, his signature infectious smile wide on his little face.

His little suit clung perfectly to his small figure, the baby blue pants and white shirt making him look like a perfect little doll.

“Hi, mi amor” you smiled and outstretched your arms, making Rafa grin and run into your waiting arm, carefully hugging you around your neck.

“You look very pretty, mama” he spoke, kissing your cheek as he pulled away from the hug.

You smiled wobbly as tears started gathering at the corner of your eyes, leaning down to kiss him on the cheeks.

“Thank you, my handsome boy” you whispered, resting your forehead against his.

He grinned and clapped his hands before pulling away from you and running out of the room, making you all laugh and shake your heads.

“I can bet you that Carlos sent him in here” Reyes commented, making everyone burst out laughing and agree.

“He thinks he’s being sneaky” you commented, rolling your eyes affectionately with a dreamy smile on your face.

Someone would figure that your cheeks would start hurting because of how much you were smiling, but it was the complete opposite. This was such a special day for you, a day you were never going to experience again and would only look back on in the future. You would be damned if you would let anything distract you from your own wedding.

Including Carlos and his shenanigans with your own son.

A knock on your door interrupted the moment you were having with the rest of the women in the room. Not even a moment later, your father popped his head in, looking around as his eyes searched for you.

“Can I come in?” he asked, making your mother smile and nod from where she was sitting down.

Your father stepped into the room and closed the door behind him, his eyes instantly falling on your figure. You were now standing up in front of him, every last touch added to your already gorgeous look.

You were ready to get married, ready to officially leave the family nest forever, and as the realization truly dawned on your father, he couldn’t help the tears that had started falling down his cheeks.

“Dad, please don’t cry. You’re gonna make me cry and I’ll ruin everything” you pouted, laughing as you stepped closer and took your father into your arms, rubbing soothing circles on his back.

“I just can’t believe you’re really getting married. It doesn’t feel real” he said, his voice breaking mid-sentence.

“I know, I know” you comforted him, looking at your mother over his shoulder.

You knew it would be an emotional day for everyone, especially for your parents. You were their only child, they were only now realizing that their only daughter was leaving the safety of their family and making another one of her own, without them.

They were bound to cry, and rightfully so, but you feared that you would soon start crying too and ruin the hard work of everyone in getting you ready.

“Come now, dear. It’s time for the ceremony to start” your mother soon came over and patted your father on the back, making him slowly pull back from you and wipe his teary cheeks.

He sniffled, looking between you and your mother. He smiled, proudly looking at you in your dress, taking a mental picture he would remember until the day he died.

“Your mother is right. Let’s go get you married”

♡♡♡♡♡

The soft calm ceremony music started playing through the church as the doors opened and the hall came into your view.

Your father held your arm as you took in the entire room, your eyes scanning the room before landing on Carlos. Your eyes instantly teared up at the sight of him, his hair slicked back and tears welling up in his eyes, his black suit fitting to his body just right.

“You ready?” your father whispered, smiling at you once he saw the dreamy look you were giving your soon-to-be husband.

You looked back at your father and smiled, nodding vehemently.

The short walk towards the aisle was short and sort of a blur, the only thing you could remember being Carlos’ eyes staring back at you, fidgeting to finally get you before him.

Rafa was waiting next to his father, standing in front of Lando, Carlos’ best man, smiling from ear to ear and alternating between looking at you and looking at his father.

You hadn’t even realized you were now standing in front of Carlos until your father had let go of your arm, Carlos replacing his hold with his own hands.

“Hi” you whispered, smiling wobbly.

“You look stunning” he whispered back, neither of you paying the smallest bit of attention to the officiator.

The entire ceremony went by in a blur, every word said by the priest being lost on you two up until the moment he mentioned the word ‘vows’, which is when you two finally came to and realized you were surrounded by a whole lot of people waiting to hear from you.

“Sorry, got a little distracted” you joked, making everyone around you laugh. “Um, where do I even start? I’ve been dreaming about this day ever since I was a little girl, and now that dream is finally coming true. I couldn’t have asked for a better person to spend the rest of my life with and have a family with, nobody could ever compare to you, Carlos. You make me the happiest woman in the world, you understand me like nobody else and you make me feel so loved and cherished. You gave me the most beautiful gift in the world, our son, and I can’t thank God enough for bringing you to me and showing me what true happiness looks like. I promise to love you and care for you until the end of my days, support you in every decision you make, take care of our little family with everything in me until we grow old and gray and are surrounded by our grandchildren. I love you” you didn’t know when you had started crying, but you just realized the waterfall of tears that were falling from yours and Carlos’ eyes at the same time.

Carlos quickly wiped his eyes and laughed, sniffling before looking back at you

“I don’t know how I could ever compete with that. Um, Y/N, you came into my life at a point where I didn’t think I would ever find love. My career has required me to sacrifice having a personal life, and I didn’t think finding someone who would understand it was possible. But you proved me wrong in every single way. You have been here for me from the very beginning, you have supported me in every way you could think of, you loved me and cared for me through every single up and every single down. You gave birth to our son and proved to me just how much I appreciate you for how strong you are, how proud I am to call you mine and the mother of my child. I promise to always put you and Rafa before anything else, to love and take care of you until I physically can’t anymore and be the husband and father that you both deserve me to be” you were now full-on crying, Kika freaking out behind you because of your make-up, but you simply didn’t care.

Hearing Carlos vow his eternal love to you and your son made the entire ceremony all the more real, you were really getting married to the perfect man for you and your son.

“Now, the rings?” the priest asked, and you looked expectantly at Lando, but he just smiled and looked down at Rafa.

You pouted once you saw the little velvet boxes in your son’s hands, gingerly opening them and handing both to you and Carlos.

“My little gentleman” you whispered to him as you took the box in your hand, kissing his cheek and ruffling his hair.

Carlos took your left hand in his, holding the ring over your finger as he spoke.

“With this ring I, Carlos , take you,Y/N , to be no other than yourself. Loving what I know of you, and trusting what I do not yet know, I will respect your integrity and have faith in your abiding love for me, through all our years, and in all that life may bring us.” and with that, he slid the wedding band on your finger, the cold metal a symbol of his commitment to your life together.

You returned the gesture, sliding the ring on his finger as you declared your love for him in front of your families, laughing when Rafa started clapping.

“Yay!!” he screeched, making everyone laugh and Lando take him in his arms to quiet him down.

“By the power invested in me, I pronounce you husband and wife. Carlos, you may kiss your bride” the pastor barely got the words out before Carlos stepped forward and took your face in his hands, kissing you like his life depended on it.

The entire hall was now on their feet, clapping and whistling echoing throughout the entire church. Rafael was jumping up and down in Lando’s arm, holding onto his uncle’s neck to not fall down from how excited he was. Your bridesmaids were all holding back tears as they clapped as well, but the same could not be said for yours and Carlos’ parents, who were dabbing their eyes with tissues in a desperate attempt to stop their tears.

But the two of you were stuck in your little bubble, neither of you making a move to break the first kiss you shared as husband and wife, as life partners forever.

And as you stood there, surrounded by the people you both loved the most, you knew this was just the beginning of your life together.

The beginning of your little family.

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kykyonthemoon · 2 months

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hiiiiii i love the stories you make. Can you please make rafayel x ballerina reader where reader gets taken care of by rafayel after accidently twisting her ankle during practice?? tyyy 💗💗💗💗💗

Dear Anon-san,

Thank you so much for your request. I also apologize that it took a while to finally get to you. Hope you enjoy this piece, and I'm looking forward to your continued support <3

His Little Ballerina

── .✦ Rafayel x Female Reader|MC

── .✦ Tags: soft, sweet, physical hurt/comfort, fluff, healing, reader is a ballerina

── .✦ Word count: over 1k

── .✦ Ky Ky's note: This is also my first fic after being accepted into oracleofstars network. Yay!!!

── .✦ Masterlist ♡ Request a fic

When he came to pick you up at the hospital, Rafayel's face was already so pale.

Long story short, he had just received a text from you stating that you were at a hospital near your place and needed a ride home. You had accidently fallen while executing a simple pirouette, causing your ankle to twist. Rafayel crossed his arms as he watched you sit there with a swollen ankle, his countenance confusing..

"You can yell at me after you drop me off, okay?" You said. But he did not seem any content. You knew he was genuinely concerned about you, especially after he told you over and over that you were unable to practice ballet right away since you were still a bit unwell.

He had met you for the first time after your play. While everyone was praising your charm, Rafayel was the only one who pointed out the problem with your ankle.

For a Lemurian, witnessing your struggle while dancing reminded him of the agony a merman must go through when he abandons his tail to learn to walk on land.

Therefore, you totally understood his response when he saw you were constantly getting injured on the practice floor. You did not defy Rafayel, but you felt awful for causing him so much tension.

“You only listen to me when you're in trouble, right?”

Even though he grumbled, Rafayel helped you up, holding your bag and pointe shoes on one shoulder. When he saw your few struggling steps, he winced. Then, he leant down and picked you up.

"Eh? Rafael?! Put me down.”

Your face turned red. However, Rafayel continued to carry you in his arms and walk away. He said:

"You heard what the doctor said; from now on, you must rest and let me care for you. That means I shall become your legs.”

“But… Is it necessary to carry me like this? You can just give me a piggyback ride…”

Rafayel shook his head: “I won't do so. Carrying you like that would make me seem no less like a turtle!”

You sighed and gave up. You allowed Rafayel to take you to the hospital gate in front of a large crowd. You felt so embarrassed while he kept that serious expression on his face.

You expected him to stop carrying you after you left the hospital, but Rafayel walked instead of calling a taxi. You rolled your eyes and asked:

“Are you going to carry me all the way home?”

Rafayel took a short peek at you before returning his attention to the road ahead. “Your place is nearby. We can walk home.”

You shifted your body somewhat uncomfortably. Rafayel's arms closed around you even more. You nestled myself into his neck and whispered: "People are looking..."

At that moment, a child who had just left the candy store noticed you and Rafayel. She asked:

“Miss! Are you a princess?”

Rafayel's footsteps slowed down a bit so the child could keep up. That was when you discovered you were still wearing your tutu with a flared skirt. People from the studio took you to the hospital; however, because they were busy and knew Rafayel was on his way, they departed right away.

"So, you must really be a princess to be carried like that, right?" The small girl inquired innocently again.

Rafayel came to a complete halt. He grinned at her and said:

"Correct, kiddo. She is a princess.”

You used a hand to hit him on the shoulder and said to the child:

"No, no. It's not true. I'm not a princess..."

But it seemed that the child ignored those words. She noticed your twisted ankle and asked:

“Is Her Highness injured?”

"Yup." Rafayel responded on your behalf. “She just fought a terrible monster, and it injured her ankle.”

The child's eyes were glowing, as if she really believed Rafayel's narrative. She spoke again:

"What a pity! So you came to rescue the princess? Are you her prince?”

Your cheeks felt heated. Perhaps it was because the sun beamed in this way. You were ready to urge Rafayel to stop teasing the child, but perhaps he, too, was caught up in this fabricated setting.

“A prince? I am not a prince.”

“So who are you?”

Rafayel smirked, he said while looking at you, as if those words were just for your:

“I am the God of the Sea. I am her God of the Sea."

“Whoaaaaaa!” The child cheered, and you held your breath as you caught Rafayel smile at you. The sunshine appeared to cast an aura over him. You could only adore him silently, fearing that a single breath might cause him to vanish.

At that moment, the girl's mother summoned her back. She placed a little bag of sweets on your lap, atop your flowery skirt, and declared:

"For you, Your Highness. Perhaps you need them more than I do. I pray Your Highness gets better soon!"

After saying that, she ran away. You just had time to say thank you, almost like a shout behind her.

Rafayel grinned all the way home, and you felt happy with simply a bag of sugary treats. You poked his cheek.

"See how delighted you are. She handed me candies; you won't be getting any of them!"

“So unfair!” Rafayel yelled as he kept strolling down the pavement while holding you in his arms. “I'm having a hard time carrying you home. How come you're so blind to see it?”

“Then why did you walk home instead of taking a taxi?” You softly pinched his face and noted the way he pouted.

“I'm exhausted, and dehydrated. Yet you're far from being gentle with me after all!”

You giggled and replied, “You just told that kid I am a princess. So you must serve me in the next few days, right?”

Rafayel did not respond. You figured he was reluctant to confess you had him in the palm of your hand, even if this was not something new for either of you.

“If you stay silent, it means you agree.” You said cheerfully. “Come on, my God of the Sea! I want to go home and have seafood for dinner!”

Rafayel exhaled. “I give you an inch, you will take the whole yard.” However, he still smiled pleasantly. The afternoon sun imprinted both of you on the road, while your shadow just kissed his, on the cheek.

Mood board from my photo in game & Pinterest.

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theemporium · 11 months

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maybe some more 🧸for Carlos and Butterfly and their second baby including Lando and toddler Esmerelda? Just wee innocence?

thank you for requesting!🫶🏽

“Esme, no running!”

A series of giggles could be heard along with soft pattering of footsteps on the wooden floorboards.

“Lando, also no running!”

“Boo!”

You pressed your lips together, trying to bite back the grin that wanted to spread across your face as you walked into the kitchen. It was barely ten in the morning and the house already felt lively with the happy sounds of a two year old Esmerelda being chased around by Lando, who had been visiting for a week over the holidays, and Carlos settled in the kitchen as he prepared everyone’s breakfast.

Your heart warmed at the sight, knowing Carlos had probably been doing his best to keep the volume low so you would be able to lie in this morning. But you didn’t care. In fact, you would take a happy and lively house over some sleep any day of the week. It made you feel full and complete.

“Ah, mi tigre, you want a strawberry? Hm? They are Mama’s strawberries but I am sure she won’t mind sharing with you,” Carlos cooed at the small baby in his arms, just over seven months old and already looking like a carbon copy of his father.

Little Rafael Sainz garbled happily as his chubby fingers reached for the small strawberry chunk Carlos was holding out to him.

“I guess I can share my strawberries with a little guy as cute as him,” you commented casually, leaning against the doorframe.

Carlos whirled around, his face instantly lighting up when he saw you. In an instant, he was walking across the kitchen so he could reach out for you with the arm that wasn’t currently coddling Rafael to his chest.

“Mi mariposa,” Carlos hummed as he leaned down, pressing his lips against yours for a few seconds before pulling back. “Did we wake you up?”

You smiled, shaking your head. “You should have woken me up, though. I could have helped with breakfast.”

“Papa doesn’t need help!” A voice suddenly exclaimed as Esmerelda came to a stop by your legs, looking up with a tooth grin. “Uncle Dodo is helping.”

“Still don’t know how I feel about being nicknamed after a dead bird,” Lando grumbled as he came up to stand behind Esmerelda, his hands on her shoulders as she snickered at him.

“I think it’s cute,” you said to him with a soft smile.

“You’re too nice to say otherwise,” Lando snorted in response.

“Yes, well, your Uncle Dodo could have done more to help me,” Carlos commented, flashing the Brit a look.

Lando only grinned innocently in response. “I was doing my duties.”

Carlos raised his brows. “Which are?”

“Babysitting my favourite godchildren,” Lando answered easily before he reached for the baby in Carlos’ arms, cooing as Rafael’s hands instantly stretched out to reach for his curls. “There’s my favourite little guy.”

Esmerelda rolled her eyes.

“Aye, don’t be like that, mi oruga,” Carlos mused as he reached down, not even hesitating as he swiped his daughter into his arms and listened to her giggles echo through the kitchen. “Papa will always be here to lift you.”

She blinked up at him, her eyes holding all the adoration for her father. “What about when I get too big?”

“Your father is very strong,” you said to her, pushing some curls behind her ear and lightly tickling her neck as she squirmed in Carlos’ arms. “He will always be able to carry you.”

She smiled up at Carlos. “Really?”

“Really,” Lando answered for her. “Your dad can pick me up.”

Carlos sighed. “When will you stop bringing that up?”

“What, so Uncle Dodo can’t feel like a princess sometimes too?” Lando scoffed as little Rafael garbled happily in his arms like he understood the Brit. “Inequality in this household!”

#cece's slumblurb party #carlos sainz #formula one #f1 #carlos sainz x reader #carlos sainz x you #carlos sainz x y/n #carlos sainz fic #carlos sainz one shot #formula one x reader #formula one x you #formula one x y/n #formula one fic #formula one one shot #f1 x reader #f1 x you #f1 x y/n #f1 fic #f1 one shot

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zvaigzdelasas · 2 years

Text

Cuban Pedro Rafael Delgado, a 56-year-old accountant, saw his life change dramatically just days after Cuba approved a set of laws by referendum in September that allow gay marriage.

For more than a decade, Delgado, who works at a Communist Party office, lived as "friends" with his 62-year-old partner, Adolfo Lopez. He lacked basic rights and felt shunned even by his own family because of his sexual preference. "Being gay was the embarrassment of the family and I always lived with that," he told Reuters. Cuba's family code, a set of measures and regulations that establishes the rights of all Cubans, regardless of sexual orientation, to marry and adopt children, changed everything, Delgado says.

But activists and experts consulted by Reuters say the sweeping, government-led campaign to promote the law did more to moderate entrenched homophobia and machismo than the fine print of the code itself - which governs the totality of family relations and not just issues related to sexual orientation.

"There is no doubt that it represents a change...not just legislative, but also in mindset," said Adiel Gonzalez, a 32-year-old activist and professor.

"Some say that (change) is solely due to the code, but that is false," said Gonzalez, adding that changes in attitude existed before, but the discussion around the law helped people to accept other sexual orientations.[!]

For months ahead of the referendum, the government flooded Cuba's TV, radio and newspapers, which it controls, to promote the law. The government also put up billboards on national roadways and held parades, while Communist Party leaders, including President Miguel Diaz-Canel, repeatedly touted the measure.

That one-sided media push did not sit well with everyone. Cuba's Catholic Church, in a missive just before the referendum, said the state's overwhelming support and control of the media had stifled voices of opposition.

The government said at least half [!] of the island's 11 million residents participated in town-hall style meetings prior to the vote aimed at discussing and refining the measure.

Cuba registered 75 same-sex marriages in October, according to state newspaper Trabajadores. That is more than 2% of the total 3,300 marriages reported for the month, the data shows.[...]

However, same-sex households in the United States account for 1.5% of homes occupied by couples of any sex, according to U.S. Census Bureau data. [...]

Cuban transgender medical student Ariana Mederos, of Matanzas, recalls two years earlier explaining to her university rector that "he" was now a "she."

At the time, she was unprotected by the recently approved Family Code.

"I cried. I thought I was going to give up my career," she told Reuters, recalling the day. "But just as I thought it was over, he told me, 'We are going to support you throughout your transition and you will have all our support, including that of your professors.'"

Mederos says she too believes attitudes shifted in Cuba with the discussion ahead of the referendum.

"Cuba is changing and I am proof of that," she says. "I've seen positive changes but there is still much to fight for."

14 Nov 22

#homophobia/

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willowrites · 5 months

Note

Bro hear me out .... Sam and Colby as ghostface but they are killing y/n and her friend group , she's the last one but they don't kill her . They just torture her and scare her because they are obsessed but cannot admit it 🔥🔥🔥 can you add non con if possible ? If not then that's fine either

I hope this didn't make you uncomfortable, if i crossed the line I'd like to apologise, hope you have a good day 😇

LIVE OR DIE?

PAIRINGS. sam and colby x reader

SUMMARY. as you and your friend group were having a game night, you got a very interesting visit.

WARNINGS. blood, killing, implied sexual interaction (i don’t write non-con but i wrote enough for your interpretation and imagination)

AUTHORS NOTE. hi! this was very short but i wanted to write an ending that had you imagining what would come next! i didn’t want to write anything that would be someone uncomfortable so the ending is up for interpretation of what you’re comfortable with! hope you enjoyed and don’t apologize for anything! this is a judge free zone 💝

WORD COUNT. 1270

“okay so tell me again, why the fuck can anyone stand matt donovan?” your friend myra asked.

“um, no one can.” you laughed while putting away the cards to cards against humanity. it was game night for you and your friends plus the guy you’ve been talking to. your friends each brought their own little plus one to the game night this time making things more interesting.

“that's true!” your friend athena agreed. “okay are we gonna start truth or dare?”

you nodded and clapped excitedly. “yes yes! okay let’s start everyone get in a circle.” you said pulling the hand of rafael, your talking stage’s, hand.

“okay who wants to go first?” zoey asked sitting close to her friend nick.

“ill do the honors.” you spoke. “hmm, ryan truth or dare?” you asked. ryan is myra’s little hookup.

“uhh…ill do truth.” ryan said.

“hmm okay, what's your favorite thing about myra?” you ask eyeing myra mouthing a ‘you’re welcome��

“probably how she’s always in a good mood and she looks for the best in people,” he answers.

“awww ryyyy.” myra squeals giving him a kiss on the cheek.

“awww grosss but so cute.” zoey compliments. “okay i have one, y/n truth or dare?" she asks you.

"hmm, ill pick tru-" your answer gets interrupted by the ring of your house phone.

you go toward the phone picking it up slowly.

“hi! this is y/n speaking.” letting them know who picked up.

“i know who you are. y/n.” a weird voice spoke through the speaker. the voice sending chills down your spine.

“uh…okay…what did you need?” you questioned suspecting something was up immediately.

“what do i need hm?” the voice asked. “need you to open your front door.”

“is this some kind of prank call or joke? yeah well fuck off it’s not funny.” you immediately hung up. “fucking losers. prank callers.”

you rolled your eyes.

“they even used a voice changer how patheti-” the ring sounded again.

you were frustrated the phone calls were interrupting your game night so you picked up quickly so you could end it quickly.

“hello?!” you asked a little more aggressively.

“that was quite rude.” the same voice said.

“listen, you’re not funny. you’re actually very fucking annoying and ruining our night so go find someone else to fuck with.”

“aw baby it’s funnier with you.” they laughed. “hey y/n.” the way they said your name had you shivering.

“what the fuck do you want.” you asked.

“truth or dare.” they spoke.

you froze. how did they…

you immediately hung up.

your heart was pounding. that had to have been a coincidence right? there wasn’t any way they could’ve been on the line during that…or worse.

watching you?

knock knock

your head whipped toward the door.

“what the fuck?” you whispered to yourself.

“i got it.” ryan stood up walking toward the front door.

he disappeared in the hall and you heard the door open.

silence.

no voices, no chatter, laughter. nothing.

“r-ryan? who is it?” your voice choked. there was a pit in your stomach.

you heard the door slam closed causing you and the others to jump.

nothing for a few seconds before ryan fell.

a knife in his chest.

your eyes widened in fear. you were frozen unable to comprehend what you were looking at.

at first, you thought it had been a joke but the closer you got the more the smile you had on wiped from your face.

“o-oh my fucking god!” zoey screamed. “what the fuck what the fuck!”

“holy shit.” nick chokes fear seen on his face.

“no no no ryan!” myra screams in agony. “call 911 call 911!” she cries.

you quickly nodded turning back to the phone you had just walked away from but bumped into someone.

you stumbled back before making eye contact with a person with a ghost face-looking mask.

no words came from their mouth.

this time you didn’t freeze. all you did was run.

“run run run! come on!” you shouted causing the rest of the group to scatter and try to escape.

myra was still on the ground crying to ryan who had been gone for a while now.

you stopped, trying to pull myra with you. “myra come on please!” you cried.

she shook her head. “no i can’t leave him here!” she sobbed.

“myra! myra! come on we got-” before you could finish your sentence myra got grabbed by her hair and slammed so hard to the wall that when she fell down she was already gone. her head bleeding onto the hardwood floor.

“n-no!” you screamed in fear. you looked around to see if anyone else was around but all you were faced with were dead bodies. the rest of the group lying on the floor.

you then saw not one but two of the figures of what you saw earlier.

you were on the ground but tried to stand up. your legs so shaky all you could really do was scoot backward until you were met with the doorframe to the hall.

you shook your head pleading for them to spare you. “please please please don’t. don’t kill me, please. what do you want i’ll give you anything.”

you curled up, knees to your chest hiding afraid of what they would do to you.

silence on their end.

you didn’t want to look up afraid that would be the last thing you’d do.

“you’ll give us anything?” a deep voice said.

you lifted your head and made eye contact with a brunette with piercing blue eyes.

you were stunned not only because he was attractive but you’d think whatever did this wasn’t human.

“how much money i’ll…i’ll find a way. please just don’t kill me.” you cried.

the other took his mask off as well revealing blonde hair with the same piercing blue eyes.

“oh baby, we won’t kill you.” he stepped forward offering his hand.

the last thing you’d do was grab the hands of a killer.

“take my hand.” he said.

you shook your head starting to cry even more.

“i wasn't asking. wanna live or do you wanna die?” he demanded.

your lips were quivering as tears rushed down your cheeks.

reluctantly, you took his hand. he helped you up and led you to the couch to sit down.

“what’s your name pretty girl?” the brunette asked.

this was cruel. this was sick. they were asking you questions about yourself while your friends were lying around the room dead.

“what the fuck do you want from me?!” you screamed in their face.

the brunette was quick to grab you by your neck. “watch your tone, baby.”

you froze in fear silently gasping for air. not because he was choking you. no…he wasn’t even applying pressure it was because you were choking on your own sobs.

“what we want is to show you how sorry we are for killing your little friend group.” the blonde said placing his hand on your thigh. when you look down you notice splattered and dried blood on it.

“you’re fucking crazy. you’re crazy.” you repeated. “you need help.”

“then can you help us?” the brunette smiled. he treaded his knife down your other thigh.

you shook your head shutting your eyes quietly trying to control your cries.

“come on if you’re a good girl i promise we’ll make it worthwhile.” he winked kneeling down and nudging your right leg causing it to open up with the knife we was holding.

your heart raced faster and faster thinking about what he could mean by that.

#✮⋆˙ 𝑾𝑰𝑳𝑳𝑶𝑾 #sam and colby #sam and colby imagine #sam and colby smut #colby brock #colby brock imagine #colby brock smut #colby x reader #colby brock x reader #sam golbach #sam x reader #sam golbach x reader #sam #sam golbach smut #sam golbach imagine

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onsomenewsht · 5 months

Text

from the vault:

but what can I say? / rules must be obeyed

》 The Winner Takes It All, ABBA

》 Alexia Putellas x Reader

》 winner takes all [idiom]: used to say that the winner of a round will win the whole contest

No one looks puzzled when a seven-year-old boy comes rushing into Barcelona’s training centre, some even high fives him or cheers as he passes them at full speed.

Rafael is well known and loved in the building, even more for his joyful personality than for the last name he wears on the back of his jersey.

The kid turns a sharp line to join the team outside. Despite his short legs and his clumsiness in most situations, he has quite control of his footing.

The perks of being Alexia Putellas’ son.

“Looks like our mascotte is back”

“The best Putellas!”

The girls notice him as soon as he sprints from the doors, dribbling around some coaches without much effort, but trampling over a discharged pair of boots. The boy lands hands first on the grass. He takes his time to get up and clean his now stained jeans, quickly assessing the damage and deciding he doesn’t really care.

Jana catches the kid as he comes running once again, lifting him up with a bit more effort than the last time she saw him.

“Jaja put me down, I wanna hug mama!”

“Ouch, I’m not your favourite tia anymore?”

“No, Mapi is”

The girls close enough to hear the exchange burst out laughing, luckily for Jana’s ego and the team’s well being the said defender is not around to brag about it.

“Ohi, mi vida!”

“Mama!”

Hearing Alexia’s voice, Rafael manages to escape the girls’ affection to literally run in her open arms. The hug is emotional even just to watch, his tiny hands holding on the blonde’s neck as she keeps him as close as possible.

“I missed you, monito”

No one wants to interrupt the moment, so your arrival is the perfect distraction.

You excuse yourself and the little troublemaker for crushing the training session to everyone you meet on your path. They assure you it’s fine, you two are always welcome, and today is a special one after all.

A lot of hugs and jokes are exchanged, you take your time to greet all the girls, holding more firmly the honorary daughters Alexia took under her wings ages ago. You missed them.

“My favourite Putellas!”, Claudia shouts as she crushes in your arms.

“You just said that to Rafa”

“He’s the best Putellas, you’re my favourite”

“I’m barely a Putellas anymore”

“I thought you were supposed to arrive tomorrow”, Alexia’s tone is nothing but happy for the change of plan, your boy secured in her arms and quiet for the first time in weeks.

“We were, but it’s your last training session and he wanted to be here”, you move closer, messing your son’s hair as you attempt an awkward half hug.

“Mum said we could surprise you! Are you surprised?”

“I’m surprised, monito”, everyone smiles at Alexia’s open laugh.

Rafael’s arrival completely shifted the atmosphere, somehow making it more emotional but definitely lighter. Jana has been on the verge of tears for days now, hiding behind Patri as the weight of their captain’s retirement comes crushing on them.

It’s the right thing and it’s the right time, but it doesn’t mean it is any easier.

Despite all, despite her family’s fear and her teammates’ concern, Alexia is at peace with the choice. Despite your insecurities, Alexia’s certainty when it comes to important decisions like this one still manages to reassure you.

“Can I go shoot at Cata?”, Rafael asks with his mastered puppy eyes, as you drop your gaze at his stained jeans and the Catalan studies the shoes he’s wearing.

Damn puppy eyes.

“You can go, but make sure an actual adult is there too”

“Is Mapi an actual adult?”

“No, ask Ingrid or Rolfo if they want to join”, you add.

He nods enthusiastically, sprinting away toward the bubble of players who are more than happy to welcome the kid as the training session ends on a high note. You’re sure it will be difficult to interrupt their game later.

It’s easy to notice the two of you are left alone, her teammates giving you space but mostly eager to spend more time with your son.

“He just wants to score”

“We’re working on his selfishness with the ball, I swear”

You smile at the blonde soft defence, still amazed about their bond and how considerate she has been about Rafael’s passion for football. Never pressuring, never patronising, always just as supporting as any other parent could be.

“Thank you for bringing him here, I know you’re supposed to be in London for the week and I really appreciate your support”

“Don’t even mention it, Alexia”, you reassure her, “It’s important for you and It’s important for him, I’m more than happy to support it all”

“How long are you staying?”

“Just a couple of days, but we’ll be at any ceremony, don’t worry”

Alexia mumbles unamused, pretending the presence of her family alone is not enough to make her comfortable and confident to face all the events she’s supposed to attend as a celebration of her career.

“He can stay longer, I’ll be back when it’s my turn again”

“Are you sure?”, she is not really able to hide her excitement.

The new and strange routine is just starting to feel like it’s working in the first place, even if dividing a kid between two countries and two parents who didn’t manage to save their marriage is the most painful thing you both ever experienced.

Neither of you wants to upset Rafael and destabilise him even more, or worse, make him feel unloved.

“I’m sure, he’s the winner”

#woso x reader #alexia putellas x reader #woso #woso community #alexia putellas #woso imagine #woso fanfics #ap11 #happy mothers day i guess #here we go again #from the vault #shit i started but left behind #maybe its shit worth to be out here #just quick and short #i hope you like it #my wo(rd)so

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lets-try-some-writing · 26 days

Note

(For your Mr. Pax AU:)

Imagine the kids meeting Elita. It'd be so fragging wholesome XD

It'd more then likely be after the school day, too. Lmao.

It would and I have opted to answer the call for this ask.

━━━━━━ ⊙ ❖ ⊙ ━━━━━━━━━━━━

"So kids, how was school?" Elita grinned as the children settled on their platform, spreading out homework and other assignments for the cycle. She regarded their work with interest. It seemed simple enough in her optics, but then again, the human children were very small.

"Oh! You're Elita! Optimus's wife!" Miko shot up, a huge smile on her small squishy face. The urge to reach out and poke one of her cheeks was strong, but Elita refrained. It wouldn't do to go poking the children when it was far safer just to wait until later and do it in holoform.

"I'm his Conjunx, yes." Jack pointedly did not look in her direction. Elita could almost see the way his venting would have sputtered if he were Cybertronian. She may not have been well versed in all things human as of the present moment, but even she could see he looked a moment away from exploding.

"Woah, I didn't know Optimus was married." Rafael added his own commentary, closing his laptop to look up at Elita with wide eyes. She had to fight back an awed noise at how adorable he looked. He was tiny, his glasses only making him look more like a sparkling in her optics. She wanted to poke his cheeks as well, but that would have to wait.

"He's been my Conjunx for a very long time kiddo. Since before he became Prime in fact." Miko and Rafael made awed noises, and even Jack looked up at her in surprise, his embarrassment over the parent-teacher conference forgotten.

"Really? Optimus doesn't seem like the kind of guy to well... do that?" Jack was hesitant in his words, but Elita laughed in short order. She clutched her abdomen as she considered Jack's point of view, all but cackling. Her Conjunx could be quite stern when he wanted to be, especially when stressed. She'd already heard about how Optimus shut down any attempts at being introduced to humor. It was no surprise Jack was startled.

"He wasn't always such a stoic figure. Back when we were young, we got into all sorts of trouble." Resting a servo on her hip as he laughter died down, Elita watched as the children practically lit up at the reveal. Jack was quiet with his interest, but Rafael and Miko were not.

"Optimus in trouble? Oooh this is some blackmail material I need!" Miko did a little dance in place, the plushies on her belt shifting as she did an excited twirl. Elita again had to fight the urge to pick up and cuddle the squishy organic close. It probably wouldn't end well, but she hadn't been able to hold such a small creature since Bee was freshly forged.

"I don't think you can blackmail Prime with stuff that millions of years old." Jack, being so much like Optimus, tried to rain on everyone's parade with logic. Thankfully, his little black raincloud bounced right off Miko and Rafael who were still staring at Elita like she hung the moon.

"Married couples always have wild blackmail!" Miko flailed, throwing her arms up in the air as she grinned. Jack sighed and Rafael secretly adjusted his glasses to try and hide a smile. Elita could feel it right then and there as adoration settled in her spark.

Yes, she was keeping these squishies. She could convince Optimus later.

"I have quite a few stories for you. But only if you promise to not harass Optimus with them. He's got enough going on." Holding up a digit to her derma, Elita smiled as the children each agreed, some more enthusiastically than others.

"We won't bother him. Promise." Rafael's eyes only seemed to be made bigger by his glasses. Elita's spark leapt in its chamber, the cuteness of the scene overriding her usual serious attitude as mischievousness she had long left behind began to resurge.

"Settle down then children. Let me tell you all about Orion's first visit to the docks." Elita could see Optimus out of the corner of her optic looming in the nearby hall. He looked to be mostly uncaring as he waited there, listening in. But she could see the hint of a smile on his features. He wasn't opposed to her decision, giving her all the more reason to tell her tale.

It had been so very long since they'd had anyone who cared enough to hear their story.

#transformers #maccadam #transformers prime #optimus prime #elita one #oplita #optimus x elita #teacher au #tfp kids #miko nakadai #jack darby #rafael esquivel

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painted-bees · 1 year

Text

Hi-Note Masterpost!

[Also available to read over on our website!: https://www.larkandwren.com/hinote (some of the earlier writing and such has been edited there, as well, for better/more accurate continuity! It's a better read, in general.)] So, who are these guys?

They're just characters who've been living in my head rent free. Sean and I have been kinda developing them on a whim and we don't really intend for them to have like... a formal comic production or anything, just really casuall...little slice of life comic sketches, largely unedited walls of texts, that kinda thing. This little masterpost is about as organized of a product as you're gonna get about them!

Here, have their toyhou.se pages, as a starter!:

https://toyhou.se/2430896.cortes

https://toyhou.se/21370126.rafael-ephrem

https://toyhou.se/21369477.magritte-bailey

Introductory post, the basics about these guys!:

https://www.patreon.com/posts/cortes-80275480

Raf's Family: https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/720121276234170368/one-person-said-yes-thats-all-the-permission-i Raf's Condition: https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/724184582183927808/good-questions-and-im-nervous-to-answer-cuz?source=share

[comic] The litmus test:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/722423019768774656/nah-just-bog-standard-this

[prose] The Meet-Cute: i https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/731262008425644032/august-12-2008-magritte-had-only-ever-heard?source=share&ref=painted-bees ii https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/733051366576144384/part-i-hitting-a-cafe-during-rush-hour-wasnt?source=share&ref=painted-bees

Raf and Margie's early relationship:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/713687883290214400/thinkin-more-about-magritte-and-rafael-because-of

[comic] Place to stay: https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/728717693050650624/november-2008-magritte-and-raf-had-been-meeting?source=share

second night: https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/732783223474733056/a-scribbley-little-comic-about-the-second-time-raf?source=share&ref=painted-bees

[prose][nsfw] First Kiss: https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/735866872788074496/cw-explicit-content-march-18th-2009-the-top?source=share

[comic] Forgetful:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/722820351292211200/a-quick-sloppy-little-comic-about-magritte?source=share [New!] Job Offers and Commitments: https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/745376745457418240?source=share

[comic] Oui'd: https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/733959177193586688/terrible-thanks?source=share

They had a little fight: https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/724734371517579264/haha-okay-deep-inhale-so-back-before

[comic] "Omelette du Fromage":

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/718285360589930497/she-doesnt-understand-a-word-of-french-original [New!][comic] What if things were different?: https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/745579096757747712/rafs-amount-of-self-awareness-and-the-amount-of?source=share

[nsfw][comic] Havin' a normal one:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/714015076047273984/its-dead-hours-on-tumblr-everyones?source=share

[comic] The Phone Call:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/727857213109059584?source=share https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/727881395615170560/follow-up-from-last-nights-lil-doodle-magritte?source=share

[prose]How They Met Cortes:

i https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/733653276161130496/september-23rd-2010-i-the-tide-was-lower-than?source=share

ii https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/733928740517724160/part-i-and-ii?source=share iii https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/734558753585856512/part-i-and-ii-part-iii-iv-and-v?source=share iv https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/738680136750219265/part-i-and-ii-part-iii-iv-and-v-part-vi?source=share [comic] Bong Water: https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/739481533849698304/a-sketchy-lil-comic-about-the-first-and-last?source=share [nsfw][comic] "Want anything from the store?":

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/713269794440364032/smutty-sketch-beneath-the-cut-youve-been-warned?source=share

[comic] The Grant:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/714134937042927616/magritte-receiving-the-most-validating-news-shes

Fourth Roommate:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/716454157486374912/painted-bees-they-found-a-very-unwell-cat-in-the

[New!][comic] Quiche: https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/745361507256238080/she-said-what-she-said-raf-hi-note-draw-by?source=share

[comic] Today's Mood: https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/745084030149689344/hi-note?source=share

[comic] Dig your vibe: https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/725286527536611328/dorks-ocs?source=share

[New!] [comic] No DuhVinci on Youtube Dot Com: https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/754347606775414784/a-sketchy-little-comic-about-margie-finding-a-cute?source=share

[New!] [comic] Fictional Stage Guys: https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/749272041458450432/raf-voice-say-sike-right-now?source=share [interview] Vanity Fair: https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/741733741222854656/raf-ephrems-return-to-be-honest?source=share

Lil' timeline of major events:

-1980: Rafael is born in Monaco, January 29th. -1984: Rafael receives his first custom-made violin and begins lessons. -1987: Magritte is born in Timmins, Ontario, August 12th -1988: Rafael's uncle, Guillaume, quits his role at Ephrem Records and leaves Monaco. -1992-1997: The peak years following Rafael's rise to becoming an internationally recognized child performer, bringing the Ephrem Records label into popular culture. Raf begins attendance at Juilliard during the autumn of 1997. -1999: Magritte buys her first musical instrument (Yamaha PSS-270). -2001: Rafael graduates Juilliard with a bachelor's of music. -2002: Rafael reaches out to his uncle in Vancouver and moves in with him the same year. Begins his job at Hi-Note Studio as a sound engineer. -2003: Rafael receives his formal diagnosis of (complex)post traumatic stress disorder and paranoid personality disorder. Moves out of his uncle's house and into his own apartment during the winter. -2004: Magritte graduates high school. -2005: Magritte is kicked out of the house. -2006: Magritte starts her "Stampy Ptarmigans" youtube channel with recordings of her street busking sessions. -2008: Magritte and Rafael meet in a downtown Vancouver skytrain station. -2009: Magritte moves in with Rafael and begins working at Hi-Note Studio with him. -2010: Uncle Guillaume passes away, leaving Rafael to inherit the cabin on Cortes Island. Rafael and Magritte move to spend a full year on the island and meet Cortes during the autumn. -2011: The trio return to Vancouver as their main home, electing to spend the late spring months on Cortes island. -???? -???? -2014: The trio formalize To Be Honest as their band name and release their debut album.

QnA and comic doodle repository:

Cortes tidbits

#All Cortes Posts! About her shapeshifting:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/714957835563417600/so-do-magritte-and-ralph-also-kiss-cortez-when?source=share

Some more about Cortes: https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/724506918894338050/bestie-i-just-gotta-know-more-about-cortes-i?source=share

Favorite marine animal to eat??? Wanderlust?:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/716285392928849920/cortes-when-not-in-human-shape-whats-your?source=share

Sexuality?:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/712778141904551936/ive-not-seen-the-uh-juiciest-bits-but-is-she

Smol ears:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/714819788155879424/brush-back-your-cryptids-hair-to-revealtiny-ear

On weaknesses, grudges, and stress:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/719478125281558528/29-30-32-36-for-the-beloved-sea-monster

[nsfw] Aphrodisiac seafoam:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/712764198982172672/weird-sexually-suggestive-sketch-under-the-cut-no?source=share

Rafael tidbits

#All Rafael Posts! About his upbringing:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/713735788987400192/as-a-fellow-acespec-i-want-to-toss-raf-into-a

Age meme: https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/736152968285585408/here-a-quickly-drawn-little-age-meme-thing-of?source=share

Why Raf didn't quit music:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/712841341417177088/aw-haha-hes-come-close-lets-be-real-initially

His relationship to music now: https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/731592322959245312/this-little-meetcute-writing-doodle-has-funnily?source=share https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/737858475276779520/reading-through-your-hinote-tags-it-was?source=share

Past Relationships: https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/735254268413657088/okay-lets-start-with-margie-then-when-she-was?source=share https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/735961804412436480/do-you-have-a-drawing-of-rafs-ex?source=share https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/735972292585259008/lacey-and-raf-brought-out-the-worst-in-each?source=share

On wanting to be loved:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/719294362638499840

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/719299404703711232/has-raf-not-had-a-single-loving-relationship-in

Why the shitty shades, buddy?:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/712297486497267712/the-glasses-are-dorky-orange-plastic-framed-dollar

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/714677266522734592/raf-latched-on-to-the-cheap-dollar-store?source=share

Patience and therapy:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/722908753561812992/i-was-wondering-if-theres-a-story-reason-or?source=share

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/722980953078792192/everyone-is-sharing-about-the-ticket-comic-from?source=share

Anxiety Beach:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/725410887443398656/rafael-has-always-had-a-lot-of-trouble-with?source=share The shoes are his toxic trait:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/715404514243608576/rafael-pls-ignore-me-im-just-an-unremarkable

On appearance, wants, secrets, and gestures:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/719483329917894656/aaaaand-27-42-43-48-for-raffy-3

On being scared:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/723058277983862784/for-rafael?source=share

Has he met Margie's folks?:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/714545195223515136/a-while-back-i-asked-if-margie-met-rafs-parents

[nsfw] sexuality:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/713594497867595776/smutty-sketch-and-character-ramblings-under-the?source=share

Magritte tidbits

#All Magritte Posts! Age meme: https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/736321876488601600/margies-turn-to-be-quickly-sketched-for-the-age?source=share Past Relationships: https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/735254268413657088/okay-lets-start-with-margie-then-when-she-was?source=share Her relationship to music: https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/732043488118636544/best-reactions-of-me-playing-on-toy-pianos-which?source=share A bit about her (very nascent) career: https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/725706356775075840/i-havent-said-much-about-magrittes-musical?source=share Her feelings towards her parents: https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/737368200819458048/ok-im-just-gonna-come-right-out-and-say-it-i?source=share

[New!] She really likes Kirby: https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/737230742514548736/okay-but-i-feel-like-i-need-to-make-a-post?source=share

On smarts, self image, and hobbies, home, stress, and gestures:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/719481526715318272/for-the-ask-game-that-you-just-posted-i-would

One ridicule, humor, life goals, and voice:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/719482287952199680/sweet-magritte-39-40-44-48-49-3c

Has she met Raf's folks?

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/712869691265253376/has-margie-ever-met-rafaels-parents-howd-they

All Three

Is it polyamory?? (yes):

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/714455918796013568/this-has-probably-been-explained-already-and-i

Their dynamic between the three of them: https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/724339636885995520/sometimes-a-family-is-a-man-a-woman-an-eldritch?source=share

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/722433005627555840/okee-good-morninganswering-this-for-real-now

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/723077384272773120/im-procrastinating?source=share

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/735210215055736832/who-can-resist-a-good-meme-template-not-me-x?source=share

on conflict and resolution: https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/724639084135530496/i-am-very-late-to-the-blorbo-birthday-ask-party?source=share https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/724640459960565760/cortes-wasnt-mentioned-in-that-ask-but-i-want-to?source=share

Jealousy?:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/714952145726816256/question-for-bee-are-any-of-the-cortes-trio

Raf + Cortes:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/714226843319943168/if-you-took-the-whole-vibe-of-lofi-beats-to-study

Drugs..?:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/714312079362932736/ocean-spray-mdma-makes-me-want-to-know-more-about

The best gifts they have received?: https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/724537976617648128/happy-birthday-what-is-the-favourite-gift-the?source=share

On manners, school, and humor:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/719479400026062848/raf-21-magritte-14-cortes-40

Who cooks?:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/712782848085622784/ooh-speaking-of-favorite-foods-do-they-all-cook

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/714402100415709184/about-the-cortes-trio-what-is-their-go-to-dish-to?source=share

Sexuality:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/712832179060801536/so-now-we-know-that-cortezs-sexuality-is-squishy

Nightly routines:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/716217886433230848/cortes-trio-question-what-are-their-night-time

Who likes suprises?:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/715000402582667264/magritte-loves-surprises-unexpected

Favorite type of music? https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/724508117912748032/happy-birthday-hope-you-have-a-great-year-your?source=share

Favorite hobbies?:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/716215145470246912/cortes-trio-favourite-hobbies-and-things-to-do

Favorite Animals?: https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/724510976169443328/what-are-the-trios-favourite-animal-i-would-ask?source=share Favorite foods?:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/712779176885780480/i-have-a-question-youve-mentioned-that-cortes

On pokemon teams, soup, and surprise encounters:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/719931743598231552/bless-you-esh-lmaooo-we-did-give-them-pokemon

Do they like bugs?: https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/724508334491877376/happy-birthday-do-any-of-the-cortes-trio-share?source=share

Voice HCs:

https://www.tumblr.com/painted-bees/719754784740098048/you-ever-listen-to-a-song-and-think-the-way-i

#cortes #there a lil masterpost with allll the stuff!!!#now I can just link people to this when they ask about who these characters are. yay #cortes masterpost #Hi-Note

549 notes · View notes

in1-nutshell · 7 months

Note

And hey continuation of The last ask of old predacon buddy how would the decepticons react to Old Predacon buddy revert back into their younger form like out on the battlefield most of them would most likely be terrified (more specifically Megatron because he had to fight old Predacon buddy back then a long time ago)

Megatron is not going to have a fun time when he finds out.

Hope you enjoy!

Bot Buddy the Old Predacon turns to their younger self fights the Con's

SFW, Platonic, Cybertronain reader

The Autobot had been ambushed by the Decepticon’s.

They were being swarmed from every angle.

Buddy was becoming more and more restless hearing the sounds of battle through the console as Ratchet turned on the groundbrigde and went in to help.

“Ratchet let me help! We both know I can fight!”--Buddy

“This isn’t a game, Buddy. We can’t have Megatron know that you’re here like this.”--Ratchet

“And what about the others?”--Buddy

“If something does happen then come. But only as a last resort, do you understand?”--Ratchet

“…Fine.”--Buddy

The kids did their best to keep the Predacon calm while they kept on swishing their tail around in irritating fashion.

They were doing a good job keeping things under control despite everything.

“Don’t worry Buddy. They’ll be back before you know it!”--Raf

“Such faith you have Rafael. And such patience.”—Buddy

“It doesn’t look too good, but usually the bots have it covered.”--Jack

“They’ll be okay. The team’s been ambushed plenty of times. They always—”--Miko

“BBBBBBBEEEEEEEEEPPPPPPPPP! (OPTIMUS NNNOOOOO!)”--Bumblebee

“AAARRRGGGGHHHH!”--Optimus

“…”—the kids and Buddy

“…Rafael. Ready the groundbrigde.”—Buddy

Buddy slowly walks to the groundbrigde as Raf activates it.

They go through the portal.

Both sides saw a bridge open on the hill above them.

The bots optics widen knowing who it was.

Optimus was holding on to his wound on his side with Megatron in front of him.

Megatron also looked at the portal curiously.

What did the Autobots have up their…

Oh…

The giant predacon walked out of the portal and scanned the area.

Megatron actually stepped back seeing the site of the young Buddy.

It was almost like seeing Buddy when he first started out as a gladiator.

Soundwave was already planning several portals to help with the evacuation.

Buddy finally set their optics on Megatron and Optimus.

“MEGATRON!”--Buddy

“Is that—”--Megatron

“GET OFF OF PRIME!”--Buddy

Megatron narrows his optics at the Predacon.

“Megatron obeys NO ONE!”--Megatron

Megatron kicked Prime’s wound harshly.

The audial piercing scream that came out of Buddy’s throat made everyone try and cover them up.

It was too fast for anyone to comprehend.

Buddy had flown straight down and tackled Megatron off of Prime and proceeded to beat the ever-loving daylights out of him.

Megatron did put up a fight.

But the fight was already set the moment Megatron kicked Prime in his wound.

Buddy held no remorse for this mech.

This was no longer the Megatronus they knew from their days as gladiators.

This monster.

This Megatron.

Was the enemy.

They were close to offlining him, but Soundwave had tackled them to the ground.

Soundwave quickly sent out the groundbrigdes for the troops and Megatron could escape.

Buddy did manage to tail whip him before he went to the portal.

Buddy huffing as they carefully walk back to their team.

Ratchet is trying to patch up Prime’s wounds.

Buddy kneels down.

“Anyone who can’t walk, get on my back.”--Buddy

Buddy stayed by the injured bots side the entire time.

They absolutely refused to get treated until everyone was treated.

They absolutely did not leave Optimus’s side through the entire way, even afterwards.

“Has anyone seen Optimus?”--Jack

“No, not today.”--Arcee

“I saw him earlier with Buddy.”--Smokescreen

“Found them.”--Ratchet

Buddy has their wings and limbs around Optimus effectively trapping him to the med slab.

“You are not walking till I say so.”--Buddy

“Buddy—”--Optimus

Buddy moves their wing in front of Prime’s face.

“Sleep Pax. I’m going after Bumblebee and Ratchet next.”--Buddy

#transformers x reader #maccadam #bot buddy #tfp #tfp x reader #tfp x platonic reader #tfp optimus prime #tfp optimus x platonic reader #tfp megatron

153 notes · View notes

elliesbelle · 1 year

Text

nobody compares to you

chapter 7

pairing: ellie x reader

synopsis: you're in your junior year of college and at a party, you run into the girl who broke your heart: ellie williams. despite the time it took to reset your life, will you risk a broken heart again for her?

content warnings: modern college au, dealer!ellie, LOSER!ELLIE, cursing, ANGST, use of marijuana and alcohol, brief mention of death, descriptions of a weapon (it's just ellie's switchblade), sexual speech and content, brief mention of violence, brief description of homophobia, ellie's POV, minors do not interact

word count: 3.5k

chapters: one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen

series masterlist

my masterlist

i have a ko-fi if you like my work so much that you feel compelled to tip me ♡︎

the "nobody compares to you" spotify playlist

“Ellie, seriously, calm down. Also, can you hand me the fucking joint already?”

Dina watches as Ellie paces back and forth across the living room of the apartment Ellie shared with Jesse. She’d come back early from her Electrical Engineering Design class after silently storming out a mere 15 minutes into the lecture. She had her Particle Physics class in less than an hour, but she had very little intention of attending.

She’d even bailed on making a quick stop at Ruston Coffee in order to reclaim the jacket she’d lent to Daniela. She had four unread texts from her, but she ignored them.

“Dude, I just—” Ellie starts.

“I know,” Dina replies. “But can you blame her?”

Ellie doesn’t reply, instead angrily groaning as she plops down next to Dina on the couch. She hands Dina the joint, which was already half-burnt.

“God, at least ash it first,” Dina complains, taking it from her and flicking the dusty remains into an ashtray on the coffee table. “Anyway, what the fuck is she supposed to do? Not move on from you?”

“No, but—”

“You’re only this mad because Abby Anderson’s the one she was seeing before you,” Dina says before taking a hit of the joint. “I mean, you’d still be irritated if it was someone else. But now, your ego is a little bruised.”

“Oh, shut the fuck up.” Ellie scoffs. “And she and I weren’t seeing each other, we—”

“It’s been two fucking years. You need to stop saying that shit.” Dina interrupts, getting exasperated.

“We literally weren’t—”

“Who the fuck cares, Ellie?”

“D—” Ellie attempts, but Dina continues.

“She was in love with you, and you were so fucking in love with her. And don’t try to pull that shit with me, saying that you weren’t in love with her.” Dina adds, seeing that Ellie was about to interrupt once more. “Everyone saw it, and everyone knew it. Fuck, even Joel saw it, and it’s Joel.”

Ellie says nothing, choosing to stare intensely at her fists. They were turning white from how hard she was clenching them in agitation.

It had been so long since she’d seen your smile, the honest and genuine kind that you used to flash at her countless times. She hadn’t seen it since before your cousin Rafael passed away. The way it’d adorned your face so naturally just now, it broke something in her today the moment she glanced your way. Something that she’d hastily patched up after you cut her off completely. And for Abby Anderson to be the reason for that smile…

Dina purposely blowing smoke in Ellie’s face wakes her up from her reverie.

“The fuck, D…” Ellie complains, coughing and fanning a hand in her face to clear the smoke.

“Jesse and I love you very much,” Dina continues, ignoring her curses. “But to be honest, we’ve kind of been pissed with you for a while now.”

Ellie’s eyes shoot up to frown at her.

“What is that supposed to mean?”

Dina sighs.

“We love her a lot too, you know. And we miss her. The past year, she’s pulled away from us because of you. And we would have pushed, but she asked us not to. She asked us not to choose and to just keep being friends with you like normal.”

“I—“ Ellie stutters. “I didn’t know that.”

“Because she told us not to tell you.” Dina sighs. “Even after you hurt her, she still thought about you. She knew how much we mean to each other, and she didn’t want to get in the way of that. And that’s why she hasn’t told either me or Jesse what happened between you two when you took her home at the end of that summer.”

Ellie puts her head in her hands, recalling that drive. That day rattled in her mind constantly over the past year or so. She’d tried consistently to repress it at first, but it was all cemented in her mind: your nervous twitching and fidgeting, the way your lips trembled when you spoke, the redness of your eyes as you fought not to cry. Eventually, she gave up trying to forget it all; deep down, she knew she deserved to live with the guilt.

“Fuck.” Ellie sighs.

“Yeah.”

They sit in silence for a few moments as Dina finished the rest of the joint, eventually putting it out on the ashtray.

“So,” Dina finally speaks. “You gonna tell me what made her break up with you?”

Ellie sighs.

“I don’t think you really wanna know, D.” She mutters.

“You know,” Dina says. “It’s not really fair that you’ve had me and Jesse update you nonstop the past year on what’s been going on with her, but then you won’t tell either of us what went down.”

“It’s just…” Ellie continues, thinking. “I know you both think I was real shitty for what I did to her. And I’m not saying you shouldn’t think that. But I don’t want you both to think that I’m a complete and total asshole.”

“Well, that’s where you’re wrong.”

“What do you mean?”

“You are a complete and total asshole.” Dina shrugs.

“Oh, you dick.” Ellie says, smacking Dina’s arm a little too hard.

“Ow!” Dina complains, rubbing the spot where Ellie hit her. “We don’t all go to the gym religiously, you know. Some of us are delicate!”

“Pussy.” Ellie chuckles.

Dina rolls her eyes before getting up from the couch.

“Anyway, get your shit together, Williams. I gotta go.” She says. “Got class in about 20 minutes.”

“Skip it.”

“No. Go to your next class, Els.”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever.” Ellie says dismissively, brushing her off.

Dina said her goodbyes and waved before leaving the apartment, locking the door behind her.

Ellie sat with her thoughts for a moment before getting up to walk to the kitchen. She grabs a mug from the cabinets, one decorated with a red-winged blackbird on one side and a sandhill crane on the other. After she nearly fills it to the brim with whiskey, she begins drinking it impatiently as she makes her way into her bedroom.

She places her now half-empty mug on her bedside table before plopping down onto her bed. Not bothering to remove her dirty Converse, she stares up at the prickly, white ceiling.

Abby Anderson? Why her?

Her tattooed arm was positioned above her forehead while the other laid on her side, her old, trusty switchblade suddenly in her hand. She starts playing with it mindlessly as thoughts of you swim inside her head.

When the fuck did she start seeing her again? She didn’t even like Anderson that much…

Ellie’s mind was a battlefield. She begins recalling memories of you when you’d talk about Abby Anderson, trying to discern the level of attraction you had for her from the bashful looks on your face and the dreaminess in your voice. At the same time, she was trying to push away her own emotion from those memories: the forced smile she’d give you when you brought Anderson up, the way she bit her tongue from unleashing nasty, sarcastic retorts about her, the seething rage she felt as she stormed away from you the first night she dropped you off at Anderson’s dorm.

She didn’t even… She only slept with her once…

Ellie thinks about that evening, when she watched you getting ready. She tried desperately to shut out the images of your tender eyes begging for her approval, your messy hair cascading down as you’d taken it out of its bun, every curve of your body that she was allowed a glimpse of when she’d helped you dress, your lips…

Anderson was just some fucking hook-up, I know she was…

Ellie remembers miserably how she waited until you’d completely turned away to watch how mesmerizing you looked as you ascended the steps to Anderson’s dorm. Ellie remembers the disappointed look you had on your face, crest-fallen that she’d kept you at arms-length the rest of the evening. She remembers wanting desperately to call out your name, stop you from walking through the door, and claim you for herself. She remembers nearly doing so, but her courage had not moved swiftly enough.

I fucked her hundreds more times… There’s no way Anderson is pleasing her like I did… I’m the one who knows how to…

Ellie begins speculating on what you’ve been doing hanging around Anderson again. There’s no way that you were just friends. She sees the way Anderson swaggers when they occupy the gym together, her flirty smirk as she greets people as she walks down hallways. Ellie recognizes another lesbian player when she sees one, and she knew for a fact how popular Anderson was with other girls. And more than anything, Ellie knows how beautiful you are. She knows that anyone within five feet of you would be delusional not to want a chance.

Anderson’s not her type… Anderson is not her fucking type… What the hell is she doing? She can do a whole lot fucking better…

Ellie’s thoughts unravel as she wonders about what Anderson was saying that was making you laugh so much. She obsesses over the way you were touching her arm, how your fingers brushed over her muscled bicep. She torments herself about what you were letting her do to you at this very moment.

I just… I just fucking saw her a couple of days ago… She’s single, she looked fucking single…

Were you spending the night at her place this evening? Were you all dolled up today just to see her? Is Anderson taking you out on a date tonight or is she bringing you straight to her bedroom? Has she touched you already today? Has she kissed those cherry-flavoured lips of yours once more yet? Is she lifting your dress over your head or are you doing it for her? Is she kissing your neck as her fingers make their way down into your underwear to—

Ellie sits up all of a sudden, yelling in frustration and hurling her switchblade across the room. She breathes heavily as she stares at her knife now fastened securely into the drywall, halfway stuck resulting from a throw a little too vigorous.

“Fuck me.” Ellie huffs, disgruntled, not by the damaged wall, but by the jealousy smoldering within her.

Why?

Ellie picks up her half-empty mug of booze and chugs it. As droplets of whiskey dribble down her chin, she glances at the painted birds on her now-empty mug.

Joel had bought it during a trip to a thrift store when she was 14 after she’d begged him to get it for her. Every time before the school year started, she’d always be sure to pack it to take with her, a piece of home. It was her favourite mug and it reminded her of her father.

She missed him. She wished she was back home in Jackson with him right now, away from these problems. Life felt so much more simple when it was just her and Joel, just the two of them against the rest of the world. But she was no longer 14 and no longer an innocent.

Ellie sighs. She deliberates for a moment or two. Maybe she could call Joel, tell him what was going on. He knew her best, besides Dina and Jesse. He usually steered her in the right direction, whether it was in a way she initially agreed with or not.

In the end, Ellie decides against it. Explaining lesbianism to a well-meaning but clueless 60-something-year-old man was hard enough. Having to illustrate the current state of her love life? Ellie didn’t have the time or patience to describe to her father how lesbian situationships worked, much less what a “situationship” was. She’d give him a brain aneurysm within thirty seconds of her explanation.

She also thinks back to the last conversation she had with Joel about you. He’d given her yet another caring but stern lecture before she headed back to campus for this school year. She knows deep down exactly how her father felt about you. Is that what she wanted to hear right now?

Ellie lets herself fall back onto the bed, pulling her phone out of her pocket once her head hit her pillow. She swipes away yet another text from Daniela without bothering to skim it and opens up Instagram. Almost instinctively, she switches over from her main account to a separate one.

For the first three months after you and Ellie fell out, you had her number and all her socials blocked. She hadn’t exactly tried to reach out to you during that time, but she hadn’t been able to resist the temptation to lurk. She’d treated it like she was defusing a bomb: she’d delicately open up social media, hastily type in your name, only to be abruptly greeted with blank screens. She wasn’t surprised. But whether out of pure curiosity or masochism, she’d continued this routine of searching your username on different platforms just to stare at nothing for a couple of minutes.

Ellie wasn’t sure what had suddenly prompted you to one day unblock her from everything. For a while, she waited to see if this meant anything, if you were going to reach out to her in some kind of way. But after a few days of nothing, she accepted the continued, albeit unblocked, silence. She wasn’t naive; she never expected you to come back to her. At least she could still snoop in peace.

Though not exactly adept with social media, Ellie wasn’t stupid. When she wanted to look at your Instagram page, she did so through a fake, secret account that she’d made solely for that purpose. It felt pitiful to do so, at least at first. But she’d known you had no intention of speaking to her again, and therefore no longer needed to impress you; so she swallowed the feelings of shame and self-disgust every time.

Switching over to a blank account with the user name “br!ck_master2013” that has 2 followers (both of which were bot profiles) and was following 0 accounts, Ellie types in your username by heart in the search bar. She scans your Instagram page for any changes. You don’t update it often; your last post is from early the previous summer and is just pictures of your family cat Clementine who had passed away.

A purple and orange circle dances around your icon, indicating you’ve posted something on your story within the last 24 hours. She let out an agitated breath before pressing her thumb onto the mirror selfie you’d set as your profile picture.

There are four stories: the first is from 22 hours ago and was a fan art post of a video game she knew you liked, the second is from 18 hours ago and was a picture of the mocha frappe Dina had gotten you the day prior with a caption thanking and tagging Dina, the third is from 15 hours ago of a post that read, “Don’t Want To See Trans People? Gouge Out Your Eyes” (prompting her to chuckle to herself), and the fourth is from this morning. Ellie’s breathing hitches.

It was a selfie you’d taken in your bathroom before you left for class. You’d captioned it with “fuck mondays but at least i’m cute,” an understatement in Ellie’s eyes. She was only permitted a minute to gaze at you in person earlier today, and it was from several feet away. A picture doesn’t amount to the real thing, but at least she can fully drink you in with her ocean green eyes this time, completely at her leisure.

You were wearing that same pretty, floral sundress, the sweater you were wearing earlier missing from your ensemble in the photograph. She doesn't recognize the dress, so she figures it must be new. Ellie thinks it looked like it was made for you, the way it fits you so perfectly.

She then dares to stare at your face. Even after all these years, she revels in how flawlessly you were always able to have your makeup complement your appearance. It was a gift, really, how you used colours to, not create your beauty, but accentuate it. And you seemed to have gotten even better at it now.

Ellie keeps taking in your image for what feels like a hundred years until your Instagram story closes out on her. She blinks and then sighs.

There’s no way Anderson hasn’t made a move on her already.

Ellie reaches underneath her bed and grabs her laptop. She knows what she was about to do pushed her even further into loser lesbian territory, but she had passed the point of caring long, long ago. She opens up her laptop and clicks on the Spotify application on her desktop.

The window pops up to display a few recommended albums and playlists. Scrolling past her most recently listened to song (“Novacane” by Frank Ocean), she clicks on the little icon on the top right that says “Friend Activity.” A sidebar opens up to reveal icons of a handful of Ellie’s friends. And of you.

When you’d blocked Ellie from everything, she guessed correctly that you wouldn’t think of blocking her on something as trivial as a music app. Most people in your generation didn’t really pay much attention to these stupid little details. But Ellie did. And she was thankful you didn’t.

Ignoring what songs the rest of her friends were listening to at the moment, she looked for your icon to see what you were playing. According to the tiny grey letters next to your picture, you were listening to “decode” by some artist named Sabrina Carpenter.

Ellie chuckles quietly. You had a rather wide variety in music taste, always having been musically inclined. But you weren’t immune to enjoying and fixating on what she would call “generic, top 40 pop straight girl music.” She’d tease you about this relentlessly, to which you would respond by turning the song up even louder and belting your heart out to it. Even though it was in the act of defying her, Ellie always noted internally what a pretty voice you had when you sang.

She figures that this artist was your current new fixation. She grabs her spare earphones from the drawer of her bedside table, plugging them into her laptop. She clicks on the song you're still listening to and lets it play. As the song progresses, Ellie feels her heart sink.

♫ You're good at the fallin', not the stayin' there / You're good at the givin' too much, then gettin' scared

You're good at impersonating someone who cares / And you had me for a minute there ♫

Ellie shifts her laptop to one side and rolls to the other, allowing the music to continue in her ears.

♫ But now I wonder why / I let your confusion keep me up at night

I'm so tired / Reread every single undertone ♫

Ellie sighs, hooking an arm underneath her pillow, clutching it tightly as she clenches her jaw.

♫ There's a weight off my shoulders now that I don't chase you / Bein' myself, did that emasculate you?

Learnin' from you that I can walk away too / And you had me for a minute too ♫

Ellie frowns, closing her eyes, allowing the song to envelop her in shame.

♫ Now I wonder why / I let your confusion keep me up at night

I'm so tired / Reread every single undertone and I—♫

“Yo, Williams—” A voice interrupts with a knock on her bedroom door.

Ellie shoots up from her bed, earphones tearing out from her ears.

“What?” Ellie answers, irritated.

Jesse’s head pokes itself through the doorway. His expression turned into amusement once he saw hers of annoyance.

“Oh, sorry, dude. Did I wake you?”

“Yeah, but it’s fine,” Ellie lies, relaxing a little and tapping the spacebar to pause the song. “What’s up?”

Jesse scans her features further. He took a step in, leaning against the doorframe.

“You alright?”

“All good, dude,” She says, closing her laptop and hopping off her bed. “Was just having a bad dream.”

Jesse considers this when his eyes wander to Ellie’s knife sticking out of the wall.

“Bro.” He says, pointing to it.

“It was a really bad dream, alright?” She shrugs.

“Els,” He groans. “If we don’t get our security deposit back—“

“Yeah, yeah, I’ll fix it.” She says, crossing her arms. “What did you want?”

“You got a second? Got someone here who wants to buy.”

Ellie sighs.

“Yeah, okay. They good?”

“Should be.” Jesse confirms.

“Fine.” Ellie replies, standing up straighter and rolling up the sleeves to her flannel.

“Cool. You might have actually met him the other night.” Jesse jabs his thumb towards the living room, beckoning her to follow him.

“The other night?” Ellie questions, trailing after.

“Yeah, he was with us at the diner after the party.”

“Wait, what?”

Before Jesse can answer, Ellie’s eyes fall on who Jesse had brought into their apartment. Wearing a backwards cap, a plain navy blue t-shirt & khakis, their visitor looks like every other standard, forgettable college frat boy.

But Ellie didn’t forget. In fact, Ellie remembers exactly who he was quite well.

“You remember Adam?” Jesse asks.

“Man, really? Didn’t clock you as a queer.”

“Yeah,” Ellie answers, eyes seeing red and hands balling up in fists. “Yeah, I remember you.”

author’s notes:

okay so part of why this took me so long to write and why it also took a lot of convincing on my own part to post is cause i was writing it from ellie's perspective and that was a lot harder than i thought!! didn't plan it to be this way tbh but that's what flowed and well, here it is!

i hope all the college descriptions i’ve been writing have been realistic enough! i had a messy collegiate experience myself and i ended up dropping out after a few years, so i’m just trying to write from experiences from so many years ago (i legit researched what kind of classes aspiring astronauts need to take cause we know our girl wants to go up in space).

the birds on ellie's mug are just references to a couple of my gf's favourite birds (she's an avid bird watcher and she loves birds hehe)!

also idk why i know ellie's a whiskey drinker, but god i just know she is. what butch lesbian is not a whiskey drinker (just from personal experience, don't kill me).

you get a gold star if you got that "brick master" reference ♡︎

i also don't know why i know ellie would listen to frank ocean, but god her loser ass would be LISTENINGGGG to frank ocean. thank you also to everyone for bearing with me and my current sabrina carpenter phase rn ♡︎

does anyone else still look at their friends activity on spotify or is that just me. i love seeing what my friends are up to! i use the airbuds app too, i feel so involved. yeah, that is a pic of me from many years ago as reader's tiny little icon the spotify pic, that's the most y'all get as a pic of me rn sdklfjsd

taglist: @lonelyfooryouonly, @elliesinterlude, @sawaagyapong, @peppesgirl, @iconsoft, @maybeidohaveadhd, @ellieswifee, @valiantllamapersonpony-blog, @nil-eena, @echostinn, @uraesthete, @softbunlvr, @cherriessxinthespring, @amitycat, @thefishymissy, @yevheniiaaaa, @machetegirl109, @bertandfearnie, @ximtiredx, @efam, @elliesnoviecita, @digit4lslut, @tayyyystan, @emothurman, @livvy-2000, @abigaillovestoread, @gold-dustwomxn, @liabadoobee, @yuckyfucky, @qtefolleunpez, @libr4sonsa, @17luv, @robinismywifee, @villainousbear, @ashlynnnnnnnn15, @scarlettadore, @vianna99, @g0n3girls, @totheblood, @embermdk, @awyunh, @kenz-ee, @marvelwomen-simp

#nobody compares to you series #ellie williams #dealer!ellie #ellie x reader #ellie x you #ellie x y/n #the last of us #tlou #the last of us part 2 #tlou2 #ellie fanfiction #belle speaks #belle writes

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