#meanwhile weekly boss materials: let me introduce myself

[emanation-aura]

Much obliged. As requested, a long and unhinged rant about why SHENHE AND YAE share CORAL DEFENDERS, SHINOBU AND HEIZOU use the damned RUIN SERPENT, MIKA is somehow in SUMERU, and much more.

(Be aware that I am just going to ignore release order because I want to make the boss material usage satisfying and don't care about the chronological order these characters released in.)

The Vishaps

First of all: what the actual fuck do either two characters have in common with the Dragonheirs?

"Shenhe fought Beisht in the Archon Quest Interlude 'The Crane Returns Upon the Wind', and it rewards Dragonheir's False Fin, so naturally she should use it—" NO. Logical fallacy. First of all, the Coral Defenders are explicitly Vishaps, and the Fin is 'a piece of biological tissue' found after defeating them. While we cannot actually confirm that Beisht isn't a Vishap, she doesn't look the part— like Osial before her, they both take the look of Hydro elemental god rather than adapting Dragonheirs/Vishaps (and you'd think Osial + wife being Vishap would be a bigger plot point if true). Anyway, why should a Fin that doesn't belong to Beisht be used as Shenhe's ascension material? Not only is Beisht a one-time boss in permanent game content, the Fin she gives for Shenhe does not even have any lore connection to her or Shenhe. The entire thing makes zero sense apart from Enkanomiya and Shenhe releasing at the same time. Ditto with Yae; you're telling me that Yae Miko uses Enkanomiya mats while someone like Kokomi doesn't?

(Btw, 'False Fin' explicitly refers to the fact that the appendage is not a fin and not 'this isn't a Dragonheir fin'.)

The only possible explanation is that Shenhe (Cryo) and Yae (Electro) compliment the Rimebiter and Bolteater Vishaps, which still doesn't make sense to me because other dual-element bosses don't have matching pairs; take Maguu Kenki, whose characters are Kazuha and Sayu despite using both Anemo and Cryo.

Most characters generally follow a trend with their boss drop of choice— mostly tied to element, like the Regisvines and Hypostases, or otherwise with pieces of lore that mirror or reflect the character's traits or quirks. And, most of the time, they stick to the same region as their nation, except in special cases like the Mond-Liyue codependency from early-game.

Conclusion: move Yae to Thundering Manifestation and complete the toxic Inazuma Electro OT3 with Sara and Raiden. Move Shenhe to the Cryo Hypostasis, which is criminally underused anyhow, and let her join Eula and Aloy and actually get people to go to Dragonspine again. Then delete this boss. (If people are screaming new region expansions need new bosses, then throw Kokomi at this, divert Ayato to the PMA, and then delete the Hydro Hypostasis. However, as the Hypostases are elemental beings we're much more likely to need to keep all seven of their variations around for some future lore development, so this is why I'd much rather delete the Vishap boss.)

That Damned Serpent

Do you know how angry this makes me? We all hate fighting the Ruin Serpent, but it is actively worse that the three characters that use it are Shinobu, Heizou, and Yelan, only one of which is native to Liyue, and Heizou doesn't have a single connection to this boss element and region-wise.

The only one of these that should plausibly even keep using the Ruin Serpent is Yelan, because she is a) Liyuen and b) deeply connected to the Chasm. No elemental connection is whatever in this case because it's a mechanical boss; Aeonblight Drake accommodating Wanderer and Nilou, for example.

Shinobu at least has plausible deniability to use the Ruin Serpent because of the events of the Archon Quest Interlude Perilous Trail (I'm starting to think Shenhe and Shinobu's implausible boss placements are due to them featuring in interludes). But there's nothing connecting Shinobu and the Serpent in a worthwhile way, and hey, guess what, if you wanted to have a boss for 'maverick' Inazuman characters, the Perpetual Mechanical Array exists!

(This is also a side argument to why Ayaka should not be using Perpetual Heart, because this is a Khaenri'ahn Hypostasis and it clashes with Ayaka's traditional ethos in every single way. Hey, on the topic of 'traditional swordwork' and 'dual-element bosses somehow getting dual-element character dependents', guess what Cryo sword-using boss exists in Inazuma? That's right, the Maguu Kenki! Both it and the PMA embody the concept of "abandoning the biological form for a stronger, mechanical form" as literally stated in both descriptions, so it's not like Ayaka loses any symbolism by switching from one to the other, also since both bosses also drop their hearts (Perpetual Heart and Marionette Core). It would also make far more sense to pair the foremost swordsmen/women of Inazuma against a sword puppet based on the work of Iwakura Michihiro, famous duellist of Inazuma.)

With that, we therefore take PMA to be the maverick boss of Inazuma for the un-traditional, non-sword-wielding characters (just like how the PMA is an unnatural mechanical imitation of the bionic Hypostasis lifeform): we move in Sayu from Maguu Kenki, keep Gorou or delegate him to Golden Wolflord, and finally we get to Shinobu and Heizou, who both are standouts in Inazuman society for their defiance of gender social roles and unique outlooks. Then delete this thing. I don't care if the Chasm needs a boss; this is not it.

Yelan, meanwhile, can join the Hydro Hypostasis. Bonus: if we boot Kokomi to the Coral Defenders or improved her goddamn strategist characterisation, we could have every single user of the Dew of Repudiation be an incredibly shady and suspicious Hydro user, which would be a perfect bowtie on top of fixing Inazuma.

Conclusion:

The Worst Thing to Ever Grace the Spiral Abyss

"Ok, so this is a rare Anemo boss that's not the Hypostasis, so we should use it for Anemo characters—" WRONG. Have Alhaitham, Dendro scholar of the forests, and Mika, Cryo and Mondstadt explorer who has nothing to do with Sumeru. This is especially sinful because of Mika, who was evidently only shoved at the Wenut because they released at a similar time. Let's try fix this.

We have two cases here: either delete this awful abomination, or keep it. In both cases we want to remove Alhaitham and Mika because their use of this boss' materials makes no goddamn sense; both the Setekh Wenut and its Pseudo-Stamens meta-wise are discussions on the erosion of the original species of Teyvat, of a "better and more prosperous time" that was lost to the sands of time, ultimately because they are mini-reflections of Apep and her lore, being colonised into oblivion by the Usurper.

So Alhaitham and Mika don't fit this. Mika is an easy fix: throw him at the Cryo Regisvine. It's a plain answer, but it's where all the Mond-Liyue early-game Cryo ones go, and the Regisvine is also located in Mondstadt and it's been so long since it's gotten a character that uses its mat that one more won't upset the balance (in fact, if we anachronistically remove Ganyu from the Cryo Regisvine and place her with the Primo Geovishap which all the adepti seem to use, it will still perfectly balance it out with the Pyro Regisvine).

Alhaitham is harder, though, because his MO doesn't fit Jadeplume Terrorshroom (Tighnari-and-Collei 'Forest Ranger Fungi style' exclusive) or the Dendro Hypostasis (Nahida-Kaveh 'closest to true wisdom style' with the cute little addition of Yaoyao). We could, of course, just put him with the Dendro Hypostasis anyway like how every early-game Electro was stuck with theirs.

Alternatively, we could place him with the Aeonblight Drake. This is not initially an obvious choice, but a close eye reveals that it is the 'maverick boss' of Sumeru where all the misfits go (see Layla, Nilou, and Wanderer). And while Alhaitham is not really a misfit on the surface, he fits the theming of the Aeonblight Drake: its entire schtick, similar to the PMA and Khaenri'ahn robots as a whole, is a 'perpetual energy source' and 'reaching for heights mortals should not achieve' (i.e. forbidden knowledge in lowercase). Alhaitham's thirst for knowledge, combined with his actions in the Sumeru Archon Quest, can suit this far more than the Setekh Wenut.

Now, if we have to keep the Wenut for some godforsaken reason, there's also an easy fix: let Wanderer use Wenut mats. He is both Anemo and embodies the "eroded past" theming of the Wenut perfectly. The only hurdle is that the Wenut released in 3.4 and Wanderer in 3.3, but as I've already stated, I don't care about time.

(You could also put Faruzan with the Wenut for the exact same reasons as Wanderer, down to her "eroded past" backstory. This, however, hinges on whether you think she's more closely tied to mechanical habits (ASIMON) or her 100-year crisis (Wenut). It makes no difference to me either way.)

Conclusion:

(aside: it is also pathetically easy to delete the Electro Regisvine from Sumeru. Move Cyno to ASIMON for his desert origins, as that seems to be the default 'desert' boss, and move Dori to Aeonblight Drake.)

Miscellaneous Changes

On the topic of Baizhu and Kirara, which started this post: delete the Iniquitous Baptist, or make it a quest-exclusive fight like Beisht was, for Search in the Algae Sea. I acknowledge that this removes some of the connectivity in Narzissenkreuz lore between the Rene-and-Jakob expedition in Sumeru and Jakob eventually turning into an Iniquitous Baptist, but there is really no reason to make it a world boss (or somehow insert it as a one-time boss in the 3.6 world quest as well, which could lay the foundations for the eventual fight with Jakob.)

Now, where to put Baizhu and Kirara? Jadeplume Terroshroom and Thundering Manifestation respectively, perhaps, but if we carry along the assumption of completely ignoring the release dates of characters, it makes far more sense for Baizhu to use Solitary Suanni, which doesn't match him elementally but is richer lore-wise for his connection via Changsheng to Chenyu Vale. Meanwhile, I see no reason why Kirara can't use Jadeplume Terrorshroom for the beast and wild connections.

Now, in Fontaine, there is also no reason why the Millennial Pearl Seahorse and Emperor of Fire and Iron need to exist. The EFI only services Lyney and Gaming, the latter of which should really also use Solitary Suanni via Chenyu connections, and the former can easily switch to Coppelius to better match his siblings (Lynette - Coppelia and Freminet - Coppelius). Lyney is even Pneuma-aligned, matching Coppelius. In particular, I feel as though the description of Coppelius' drop also matches Lyney on a personal level:

Coppelius's dance will not stop. He will continue whirling till the bell tolls.

This is Lyney's eventual role one day, since he will have to do whatever is necessary to succeed Arlecchino and manage the House of the Hearth. He will have to do whatever it takes.

The Millennial Pearl Seahorse currently is used by Neuvillette and Chevreuse. Neuvillette's case is lore-linked rather than by element: the Seahorse, alongside EFI, emerges from the Fontemer Aberrant War as a victor, and is implied to have caused 'the first diluvian period', perfectly coinciding with Neuvillette's Hydro Dragon lore and theming. I don't have so much of a problem keeping the Seahorse, but to reduce bloat, it could work to move Neuvillette to Hydro Tulpa (ignoring release dates, obviously) and Chevreuse to Prototype Cal. Breguet. Even if Chevreuse can be tentatively connected to the Seahorse by her kit Pyro + Electro -> Overload, she makes more sense with Breguet: used by Wriothesley and Charlotte before her, she'd also fit in with the 'mechanical' theming (Wriothesley - gauntlets, Charlotte - Monsieur Verite, AKA her camera, Chevreuse - her musket).

Neuvillette with Hydro Tulpa seems strange on the surface since the material is Water that Failed to Transcend, both relating to Rene (who is a corrupted version of this boss) and Furina (who is a fake Archon), but I also find it relatively easy to justify, even better than the Seahorse. Even though Neuvillette does 'transcend' in the end of the AQ thanks to Focalors' sacrifice, he is initially born as a Hydro Dragon reincarnation without the power or Authority originally due to him, therefore narratively making him somewhat similar to Furina— both people who are taking up positions without full authority. However, remember that boss drops are Character Ascension Materials, and Neuvillette's final "Conclusion" ascension voiceline explicitly states that he has regained his full power; in addition to this, the Hydro Tulpa as revealed in the Narzissenkreuz Quest is an agglomerisation of water with "countless (human) wills dissolved in water". It is a collection of human will. And Neuvillette's entire reason why he was hired as Iudex was to witness and learn to care for/love humanity, as evidenced by how he decides, in the end, to forgive humanity (as created by Egeria) with the force of his restored Authority, and believing in their will. Therefore, Neuvillette using the Hydro Tulpa, a collection of human wills that attempting to Transcend, coincides with this path perfectly: except he succeeds in Transcending with Focalors' sacrifice.

Conclusion:

This is about the majority of things I could say; if I had the will I could also rant about local specialties (hello Thoma why are you the only person who uses Tsurumi mushrooms?).

(Broke: Neuvillette should use Hydro Tulpa materials Woke: Neuvillette should use Setekh Wenut)

Every day I wake up on this forsaken earth and remember that Baizhu and Kirara use Iniquitous Baptist boss drops and despair.

Yes, 3.6, we needed a new abyss boss for plot reasons, I understand. Let's assign it to the doctor from Liyue and the Inazuman courier cat nekomata and never look at it again.

This is nearly as sinful as Alhaitham and Mika using Setekh Wenut materials, but I digress.