#me screaming crying throwing up over drk

[impossible-rat-babies]

“now comes your part. to cloak yourself in the fiction, to breathe life into the dead, to give a voice to the voiceless...

as we did together that day, when you gave us your answer.”

[ofthedarkestlight]

4日 - prompt #4: shifting blame

how many prompts can incite my DRK angst loving heart? shoutout to my girlfriend who recorded all of the 50-60 quests so I could cry over the most minute pieces of dialogue @sea-wolf-coast-to-coast music rating: PG warnings: brief mentions of past child abuse

spoilers for drk 60 and beyond 

A heart bleeds “Fray used to tell me stories of the Fane. ...Sid said he would`ve won if they let him keep his staff.” A man weeps “Ever since you`ve joined us, we`ve visited so many new places I`m sure Fray would`ve enjoyed it to…” A soul burns Kaoru`s fist slams into the solid wood table with a frightening crack. Be it bone or stone, no one could even move to tell the difference as he raised his voice. To them, the ones that didn`t know the real Kaoru, they had no idea he could scream this loud. No one did. Not even Auguste. Kaoru hadn`t shouted in years, ever since his mother had beat the habit out of him until he tried to shut his mouth for good. Thence comes darkness. “The only time you open your damn mouth is to talk about Fray!” The words pour out like the wine glass thrown off the table, spilling deep red onto the floor with reckless abandon. Sid opens his mouth to object, especially given the company they were surrounded by, but Kaoru shoots him such a fiery look that even he is caught off guard for just a moment. “You`ve beaten it into me, both of you, how you wish he was here. More`s the pity that you got stuck with some paltry replacement instead.” Hands that destroyed just a moment earlier now shake like the lost child he once was, grasping for something, anything that felt like solid ground. “Well I`m not dealing with it anymore.” Kaoru curses, baring his fangs. “I`m tired of this charade!” He throws his sword to the ground, cursing the weight it bore onto his hands, feeling so much lighter, if only physically. His heart felt like sludge as he wandered below the bridge, and off towars the Brume. “He`s just having another tantrum,” Sid sighs, unaware he was echoing Kaoru`s mother`s sentiments. Although Rielle had only met Kaoru several weeks ago, knew nothing about him aside from a name and a face, it was enough. A momentary glimpse at the pain in his eyes when he gave her that horrible glare told her everything she needed to know. “Well then, I suppose it`s back to square one for us, Rielle.” A pause. “Rielle?” Thankfully for a girl that couldn`t risk to be seen, he hadn`t wandered too far. It doesn`t take much for one who had trained in the arts of a rogue as a child to notice her clumsy steps crunch through the snow. “You`re not going to get what you`re looking for, you know.” Kaoru`s vain attempt at sounding rude only comes off as wistful. Clearly the tone of someone who was cowed to the fact no one would ever come looking for him, unless it was something they required. “I came looking for you.” She replies tacitly as always, something that unnerved a liar like him. “Even after I yelled at you?” Kaoru can`t help but laugh in spite of himself. She nods. “You didn`t mean it. Sid does the same thing sometimes. You two are more alike than you realize.” Kaoru genuinely laughs at that. The two of them, similar? He places them side by side in his mental canvas, laughing at the disparity between his lithe hyuran frame and the towering auri male who had, on several occasions, picked him up like a plaything. “He rarely even talked to me, you know. Sid. Or to anyone really, after Fray…” She trailed off, not wanting to provoke Kaoru back into his grief. “But ever since you came along, he talks, and even smiles sometimes when you`re not looking…” Kaoru makes a funny face as he tries to picture Sid wearing anything other than a stoic or grumpy expression. He made him smile? Despite being a thorn in his side, a painful reminder of what was gone? Or could it mean that, he thought of Kaoru as Kaoru? “That`s all because of you. No one else.” Rielle worries the hem of her sweater, gaining more courage as she sees Kaoru`s walls slightly faltering in her presence. “I didn`t ask for Sid or Fray to save me.” Kaoru`s heart catches in his throat, opening his mouth to speak before Rielle`s quiet voice cuts him off. “I`m not asking you to replace him. You don`t have to.” He remains silent, the wispy snow caught in the wind melting against his freckled cheeks.  Two children who`s mothers had forsaken them, awkward in speech, tried their best to dance around each other. They both fidget, worry their bottom lips, and try to think of something that just might endear their company to them. After all, the only company they had was each other. “When no one`s around,” Rielle pipes up suddenly, “I see you humming songs... Do you like music?” It`s Kaoru`s turn to be stunned into silence, taking a moment to actually think about himself. No one usually asked these questions. “...Yeah.” Tiny slivers of memories dance through his mind, so rarely free of agony and pain. Of his hands plucking his shamisen, of the ivory keys of the strange foreign contraption in their foyer. “I do.”

“Tell me more.” Rielle implores quietly, reaching to hold Kaoru`s shaking hand. “About you.” Yet even in the depths, the flame endures.