#lots of drugs and violence
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Hehe, I didn't let the police merge in front of me in the parking lot >:]
#they are constantly at my school#lots of drugs and violence#so I#blasting thermodynamic lawyer#did not let him go in front of me >:]
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Do you know what to make of john and cyns relationship?
to meeeeee it reads very much as a "oh shit gotta get married because of the baby" comphet situation. for john especially, but cyn too even though she's straight. there's just this expectation for women to get married and life for single mothers is already hell but back then it was soooo so much worse. i mean she even said in her book that it wasn't really like a real marriage in those early days & i think about that a lot. i think obviously there was a lot of love there, but i don't think john was sexually attracted to her (or even romantically, really- he OBSESSED over her in the beginning but that's a different thing entirely).
and then of course there's the fact that he hit her when they were younger (whether or not he Continued to hit her is a question i'm not qualified to answer lmao it depends on how much you believe her saying that he only hit her the once vs his general violent behavior towards both men & women in his life) & even if he hadn't he was a shit husband & father who was not around. and when he was around he was getting high and isolating. i think that was probably an INCREDIBLY difficult period for her & i am very glad they got divorced bc both her and julian deserved a lot better than what he was giving & there's 0 excuse for the way he behaved towards them
honestly to me it just reads as a tale as old as time that most people watched their own mothers go through. woman marries a shitty man bc she got pregnant or felt societal pressure to marry, man is abusive in some way & falls into substance abuse, man is closeted as fuck and takes it out on other people, kid winds up in the crossfire of the whole thing.... it's just. well. it's a depressing relationship and it's one i've seen time and time again in real life. but she did love him. a lot. still did up until she died. unfortunately i don't think he gave like even half as much of a fuck about her as she gave about him.
#abuse tw#it's just sad lmao thats what i make of it like.....#john had a lotttt of repression going on and in his younger years that came out as violence and anger#eventually it turned into self isolation#and then it turned into hard drugs and cutting off every single person in his life#& not just about being queer just in general that man had a lot of repression going on
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next // previous
may 10, 2013 6:20 p.m. actual hell
#ts4#the sims 4#sims 4#sims 4 story#sims 4 storytelling#simblr#hlcn: everything the stars promised#kelly's attitude here can pretty much be summed up as 'not my problem do not involve me even spatially in this'#although ironically she involves herself#imo it's a very weird defense mechanism - it makes her feel like she's not involved if she tries to shut this down#mary being dead silent though is crazy#but she's so genuinely stunned that grant would throw it all back in her face after a lifetime of just the opposite#more thoughts: grant is generally not the kind of person to threaten violence but i think he very much meant it here#i mean a lot of that reaction was a shit ton of drugs in his bloodstream but also a lot was pent up rage#but ofc he says sorry at the end anyway because i don't think grant knows how to function without feeling guilty for everything#also well y'all this is...it! the moment grant cut out his parents#holocene.docx#holocene.png#hlcn: grant#hlcn: kelly#hlcn: mary#hlcn: juhani#hlcn: aoife#hlcn: joseph#hlcn: shannon#hlcn: colm#hlcn: paddy#hlcn: bridget#hlcn: catherine
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Why does twiddle like pain so much? When did it start and did he see jarna as his way of pain so thats why he went to her?
It started the moment he touched down. Every mime felt their own impact when they jettisoned down into the world, but some vessels like Twiddle's were a little weaker, and more unlucky. He sustained a lot of damage on impact and lost a lot of hemolymph right off the bat. It was the first thing he felt so physically, and while a bit disorienting, he found that he quite enjoyed the feeling. Compound that with his tendency towards failure & his ego processing failure as merely incomplete success, pain & punishment just amp him up. It's like a drug.
Of course it took him a while to realize how much he likes it. Having low hemolymph and a weaker body meant he had to take more precautions than most. The risks involved in experiencing pain excite him even more though, he'd come to learn.
His partner in crime Jarna being so aggressive and hostile in the physical realm is just a coincidence, but a very pleasant coincidence as well as the one who helped him realize his masochism much sooner than he would have otherwise. Being buddy-buddy with Rough House the Brute just means you get jostled around more. So that was a source of attraction for him for sure.
#even if and when they have disagreements#jarna likes to settle her disagreements with violence#and twiddle is a lot more tolerant if he gets smacked around a bit.#brambleramble#twiddle has become a fun punching bag for me#if im ever frustrated i just draw him bleeding or jarna pummeling him with a hammer or something#wee <3#he also gets similar feel goods from general humiliation#which goes hand in hand with any failures he endures#so like. you see why he just always kinda sucks even though he acts like he's the best#it's just bc he's found his drug of choice very early in life lol
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Partners In Crime
Chapter 1: Twilight Zone
Circumstance has never been kind to Stanley Pines - when had it ever? But when he gets in over his head yet again, and nearly bleeds out his stitches in a dank alleyway in some shit-hole city in Texas, he wasn't expecting help to come in the form of a nurse from his home state with a similarly shitty situation on her hands. Maybe they can help each other get the hell out of here, and maybe he can even get a friend in the process? A loser like him can only hope...
Probably the weirdest and also most traditionally mature fic I've ever written/am writing. Will be slow to post but I hope Ya'll like it!
Also had fun making up a fake cheesy 80s movie poster for it lol
#Gravity Falls#Stanley Pines#Gravity Falls OC#GF Nell#Annabella Gracia#gravity falls fanfiction#Mullet Stan#Content Warning for a lot of shit honestly#referenced drug use#violence#mild gore#all the stuff#mellows out in the second chapter but not by much#we shall seeeeeee#antonia arts#antonia writes
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A while ago, I had a tag called household drama and/or vent and some recent comments from @star-weed-rebels reminded me of said drama. I figured that I might as well give a comprehensive summary of events written while sober and not during moments where it could only end up being an incoherent vent.
I originally kept the names of everyone to miscellaneous terms/insults/whatever as a way to protect identities, so I will reuse those older terms that I used to keep things consistent (though idk if I would use the same terms now).
Max - My ex-girlfriend whom I broke up with in I think July of 2023
Bitch - Ex girlfriend of both myself and my current boyfriend (she was with him for 7 years before he met me)
Daddy - My current boyfriend
Dumbass - The now ex-girlfriend of Bitch
Chef - I can't find a lot of posts talking about her but I think that I was originally calling her this? Which is odd because she is honestly really really really really bad at cooking. She was a former "Friends with benefits" with Daddy and myself. Daddy had known her since they were both young teenagers (online) but only met in person in 2021 when she moved in with him cause the house needed a roommate cause rent.
For reference - Most of the drama has died down. These are not super recent events. I've been a lot more stable these days. This is simply a description of past events that I did not explain very well at the time. Unlike most of what I post on this page, I am writing this while sober.
Line break because this is going to be long. Timeline of events might be slightly off but should be in roughly chronological order.
In 2023, I was dating a trans woman who was at the time going by the name of Max. She was extremely abusive. At the time, I felt like I deserved it. For a lot of my life, I have been very depressed/suicidal/etc. I felt like being in a relationship with her was a greater punishment than death that I somehow deserved. She treated me like shit.
For a while, I had been debating whether or not I was polyamorous. This is not something that I was really able to explore while I was in that relationship, as Max was very controlling. She herself would constantly cheat on me or seek out other partners, but would throw a massive fit and scream at me and tell me how awful I was if I so much thought about the idea of finding another partner.
There was a point during 2022 (I can't remember when exactly) when Max was in rehab for a month. During that time, i ended up having someone over at our apartment to hang out with. I found him off of Grindr, because at the time Max and I were trying to find friends or whatever off of dating apps (Neither of us were any good at finding friends in general and turned to those apps).
That guy came over to the apartment for a bit. We hung out and watched anime or whatever. Max constantly accused me of cheating on her with that man. I did not. She was constantly accusing me of cheating on her when she would hook up with anyone and everyone that she felt like it.
The last straw was in early 2023 when she found that exact guy I had hung out with that time, invited him over to the apartment (while I was asleep) and fucked him while I was sleeping. I ended up insisting that at that point that I should be allowed to pursue additional relationships.
There had been points where we had both tried to have 3 way relationships (both romantically and sexually) but the problem is that any time I would start liking the person, Max would end up yelling at me and sabotaging it in some way. I'm not not giving a whole lot of detail on this topic because this ex is pretty irrelevant (though every few months she continues to try to contact me, despite me constantly blocking and ignoring her).
Anyway, I eventually went on an app called Taimi or however you spell it, and I found Bitch. Bitch (at the time) was in a relationship with Daddy but was searching for additional partners on dating apps. I did not realize at the time, but it was honestly kind of similar to my relationship with Max.
Bitch was extremely controlling of Daddy (constantly going through his phone, accusing him of wanting to cheat on her with basically anyone who he so much as made eye contact with, etc). She was dating, fucking, hooking up with, etc with literally whoever she wanted, but if he was polite to the cashier at the grocery store; she would spend the next 4 days screaming and accusing him of trying to cheat on her.
Anyways, I met up with Bitch (who acted like a sane human being for around a month). The lease on the apartment that I shared with Max was almost up, and Bitch was looking for a new roommate for the house that she lived in, cause one of the roommates was moving out. It was a nice place, and everyone living here (yeah, I still live in this house) seemed nice.
I took the gamble on moving in cause it was a far, far nicer place than my old one and everyone seemed nice. In the end, it did work out, but whenever I think about my past self, I am reminded of how goddamn stupid and naive I was. Anyway.
That old apartment needed to be cleaned out before the lease was up. The only people who helped me cleaned it up was Daddy and my mother. At the time, I was still technically dating Bitch and Max (who was the one who actually lived there at that apartment with me).
Now let me describe this apartment to you. It was the third floor. There was no elevator, only the most awful stairs you have ever seen in your life. They were so steep and garbage with a wobbly railing. The apartment was a studio apartment with a large closet, a tiny bathroom, and a tiny kitchen.
There was also a cockroach infestation. Max and I didn't realize until after a month after we had been living there because we didn't use the stove much when we first moved in. There was a massive nest of cockroaches living in the stove. By then, it was too late.
If you don't know anything about German cockroaches, they run away when the lights are on or when there is daylight. There were so many cockroaches that they had nowhere to run. They were all over the walls, the ceiling, the floors, inside everything, everywhere. It was really fucking bad.
Daddy and my mother (My actual mother ugh why did I originally choose to call him that. whatever) helped me pick through everything that was in that nasty apartment for anything I could actually wash/keep. The whole place smelled like weed and cat piss. It was so bad.
Basically everything ended up on the sidewalk. I lived in a capital city, so everything was quickly stolen or picked apart by homeless people. I pity whoever stole any of those flat screen tvs because those were packed full of cockroaches - just like everything else. Furniture, clothes, everything. It was all garbage and nasty and horrible. I am still to this day trying to replace belongings.
It was hot, too. It was so hot and sweaty and nasty with roaches everywhere. Max had a habit of throwing food around the apartment, so there was random rotting food as well. We were on the top floor, right? She had put random raw meat on the roof/awning thing that was under the window but above the other apartment. That shit was so fucking nasty.
She also had a habit of vomiting in buckets or other containers while high, so there was also that to clean up. You don't even want to hear about the kitchen. God it smelled so fucking bad.
Oh also, during cleaning all of that, Bitch was constantly calling Daddy every 10-15 minutes accusing him of cheating on her with me. While he was helping me clean up the apartment. She wanted to stay at home and not help, but spent the whole fucking time accusing him of cheating on her with me because he was being nice and helping me out.
When would we have been fucking? In front of my mother? When we were carrying the roach-infested cat trees down to the sidewalk? In between picking through to find the only salvageable belongings? It was horrible.
My mother at some point (I think in 2021 or 2022) bought me a car. I never drove it, so it was basically Max's car. After we had moved in at the new place at some point, Max crashed the car. I had to go to the hospital to get the shards of glass cleaned off. There was glass everywhere. I actually was recording a video at the exact time the car went off the road ironically enough.
Max did all "repairs" on that vehicle herself. Usually while high. Max has little to no knowledge of car repairs. In the long run, it was all her fault. Guess who was the first person in the hospital room? The first person actually fucking concerned about me? Daddy. Fucking Max and Bitch were more concerned about him being concerned than they were about me. They literally did not even care. I tried to convince myself they did, but they didn't. Bitch was all mad that Daddy let me sit in the front seat of the car on the way home and that he bought me Wendy's. You know... after I had just been in a crash that ended with little bits of glass in my ears, eyes, throat, and lungs.
After that, I started to take Bitch's paranoid advice and start fucking around with Daddy. Soon after, I broke up with Max (who faked an asthma attack while being broken up with). She went to go live with her crackhead cousin and go back to smoking crack herself. I'm not entirely sure where she went after that. I don't care, but she keeps messaging me. Most recent time Max messaged me was about a week or 2 ago. We literally broke up in July of 2023. I cannot even begin to count how many accounts that I have blocked on so many different social media.
About a month after Max and I broke up, she had a false "wellness check" made on me. The police showed up at my house because they had been told by Max (I asked them who told them this bullshit and they said her deadname) that I had called her using an app to disguise both my name and my number while drunk and suicidal. That I was cutting myself and threatening to kill myself. No part of that was true, so the cops left.
Since then, Max has attempted to charge my old debit cards and shit (to no success), emailed my mother asking for money, texted my Daddy on his business number (he breeds and sells axolotls) telling him she hopes he dies, messaged me with varying messages on various social media ranging from "I hope you die" to "I'm so sorry I just no realized I was actually abusive."
Anyways after I broke up with Max, and she left, I pretended to be still dating Bitch for a while when I was actually dating her boyfriend, Daddy. The longer I stayed here, the more Daddy and I got along. Eventually, Dumbass moved in because we needed another roommate (god why is rent so expensive).
Dumbass quickly figured it out. She did not keep quite for super long. Bitch tried to kill me numerous times, which is why Daddy and I installed security cameras in the house. The police were unwilling to believe that a woman could ever be violent, because fuck the police. Bitch and Daddy broke up, but it was a struggle to get Bitch out of the house because the police kept treating her like the victim, despite no one harming her.
The problem was that bitch had the ability to go from "I'm gonna fucking kill you. You stupid Dyke lesbian bitch. You're only pretending to be a faggot. You'll never be a man. Everyone knows that you are nothing but a stupid pathetic little delusional bitch. I'm going to strangle you to death and kill you for stealing my boyfriend from me (etc etc etc)" To "Please help officer, I live my life in fear of this terrifying man who makes me so scared because I'm such a scared little woman in fear of this big scary man who hurts me" and she would point to the hickies that her girlfriend (dumbass) gave her and act like she was being abused.
In early October 2023, I called the police, and they were immediately suspicious of me (of course). I showed them the security video that showed me saying "what's really funny is the idea of you getting a job, considering that you've never worked a day in your life" followed by Bitch screaming "I'm gonna fucking kill you" and then putting her hands on my throat. She is on video pulling my hair, screaming about how badly she wants to kill me, while hitting me and putting her hands on my throat, trying to knock me down onto the floor. I did not fight back or do anything other than tell her to get off of me. Dumbass ended up pulling her off of me, and they went to their room, where Bitch cut herself to make it look like a fair fight.
Bitch was taken to the hospital, and brought back after about 3 hours. I had a miscarriage overnight. In the morning, I woke up bleeding. Chef asked me if I had a miscarriage. I confirmed that I had. She then took it upon herself to start faking a pregnancy. This was both to mock me, and also to try and get the attention of Daddy. She was constantly jealous of us, saying that it was not fair that he spent so much time with me, that it was her right to his attention, etc. Daddy ended up confronting her about it when he realized that she was using those fake pregnancy tests that automatically show up as positive when wet. So her attempt to get his attention backfired on her. Oh well.
The morning after she was brought to the hospital, the police showed up to arrest Bitch. She was brought back after about 3 hours. She was charged with 2nd degree harassment. Because trying to strangle someone to death and causing a miscarriage is considered only "harassment" I guess. They put in place a temporary "refrain from" order of protection (which basically means that if she committed any further crimes against me she would be arrested again).
Dumbass and Bitch ended up moving out of their own free will in early November of 2023. They moved in with Max and Max's crackhead cousin. Bitch is a methhead now or something. They broke up with Bitch stabbed Dumbass (apparently she actually went to jail for that one). Dumbass apologized to me for previously going along with Bitch and lying to the cops about me being violent. Dumbass is also now dating another one of Bitch's exs, which I find really fucking funny. Bitch is still harassing them to this day.
Did I mention that Bitch is the kind of person who plucks the wings off moths and laughs as they writhe on the ground? That she has a son (who was not even with Daddy even though he was born when they were together) that she was only allowed to see for 2 (supervised) hours per week and she wouldn't even bother going to see him half the time. During the time I knew here, the 2 supervised hours was knocked down to 1 hour per week. Probably because she wouldn't bother fucking showing up.
Anyways once Bitch and Dumbass and Max were all out of the picture, it was just me and Daddy. Oops no it wasn't. Cause Chef existed.
In mid November of 2023, I went to a reptile expo with Daddy and Chef to sell axolotls. The longer I was around, the more interested I was in the Axolotl business. I noticed that while Chef was supposed to be helping in the business, she really wasn't. She would alternate between not feeding the axolotls for days, and overfeeding them. They kept dying under her care to the point where Daddy was debating just shutting down the business. She neglected her own animals.
Over the time I lived here, I watched her button quails die off. She wouldn't replace their bedding until everyone told her a dozen times to do so. She didn't feed them regularly or give them fresh water. Any aquatics she had died from lack of being fed or having water changes. I caught an ear infection from her cat and ended up having to get antibiotics to treat her. Her bearded dragon, like everything else was pretty much starving. She like do collect animals, and then not fucking feed them. She could make any of her pets experience what it is like to be suicidal with how awful her care of them was.
At that expo, Chef got mad that I got a ball python, and how it wasn't fair that Daddy didn't buy her a gecko that she wanted. I bought that snake myself but she threw a goddamn fit cause he didn't buy her another lizard to neglect. The day after that, I took over taking care of the axolotls. I still have that notebook that I brought downstairs to track all care of the axolotls. Business is thriving and at this point I'm doing more than she ever did.
I ended up pregnant again (which is why I stopped posting on this account for a while cause I mainly only post on here when I'm smoking weed).
In march of 2024, while Daddy and I were out getting his truck inspected, Chef moved out with the help of her friends. She also falsely reported him of raping her (because she was mad that he wasn't having sex with her anymore. She was obsessed with becoming pregnant. She was constantly begging him to have sex with her all the goddamn time. i think she was hoping he was going to date her after breaking up with bitch, but he ended up with me instead. she would literally ask him to get his sperm tested, and made like weekly appointments at the fertility clinic. she was so mad that he ended up getting a trans man pregnant and ignoring her all the time that she falsely accused him of rape out of jealousy. there is evidence to disprove literally everything in every single page of her statements. the case is still ongoing but literally everything she said can be disprove down to the number of fake miscarriages she claims to have because she can't even keep that lie straight.)
[Just an insert here that I forgot to mention, but Chef would grope me constantly. She didn't stop until she was removed from the Axolotl business. She ended up stealing a bunch of axolotls when she moved out, which I had to replace with my own money. There are times where I was having PTSD attacks and would go to Daddy for comfort, and she would grope my ass. She was constantly trying to force us to enact her sexual fantasies and got mad when we wouldn't.]
I don't want to get too into that whole mess, but trust me when I say that that piece of shit has no idea what it is like to be a victim of rape. Her story changes so much it's like she was scrolling through pornhub to find her favorite fetish rather than describe an event that happened. Most of what she claims he did, I've watched her beg him to do, then get angry when he refused. She was constantly begging him to do these roleplays and shit. She was so fucking jealous of my pregnancy. She fucking moved out with the help of her friends who were never around to see how much she lied about literally everything.
Again, if you even think for a second that he could be guilty, trust me that he's not. We have literal security cameras in the house that disprove her bullshit as story. Her story doesn't even make sense as she describes acts that are not physically possible. She claimed she ordered plan b? She ordered it before she claims she was even assaults. Quite literally no part of her goddamn story makes sense, she just did this cause she was mad he didn't love her.
In her story she claimed that she was his boyfriend. That they were dating each other and that he forced her to date him or something? We have so many texts where she was begging him to fuck her??? She would constantly beg him for sex. I don't know what is wrong with her but yeah she is gone now.
Anyways, I gave birth in July 2024. Everything has been good since then pretty much. There is the ongoing legal issue but trial keeps getting delayed. Daddy's lawyer is not worried about it due to how there quite literally is evidence to disprove every single claim made by Chef. Also how everything she has said contradicts other things she said in her own statements.
I've been happy these days, something that I never thought I could really be. I'm in a relationship with someone who loves and cares about me. Who does everything he can to make sure that I'm happy. Who has never done anything to harm me. We have a beautiful son together, and sometimes life is hard but we get through it together. We've both been through a lot of bullshit, but at this point try and avoid other people and avoid drama.
Every so often we get contacted by our exes who are mad that we are together, but whatever. Block them. Block and ignore them. They don't matter.
We're both just autistic idiots trying to mind our own business. Him and his flight simulator. I've been learning to crochet. Did I mention he custom built a shed for me for my cats? Before we were even dating. Because I couldn't have my cats in the house. Its insulated, heated, etc. They have platforms on the walls. He does everything he can to make me happy. He helps me when I'm having PTSD attacks.
We run the axolotl business together. We spend our time together. I love him. I never thought I could be with someone who actually cared about me, but I finally am.
I can finally be at peace, so long as I am with him.
Oh yeah, he finally openly admits that he's bisexual now and not straight :3
#household drama and/or vent#this is really really long so i am not going to go back and edit it but i guess you can ask for clarification#trigger warnings#miscarriage#violence#attempted murder#depression#police#false accusations#pregnancy#drug use#relationships#drama#relationship drama#bug infestation#infestation#cheating#abuse#lying#gaslighting#idk what else to tag this with but yeah there is a lot#transandrophobia
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My opinion on the hug kinda kept changing until recently, but I might have reached a definitive reading.
So, first of all: season 4 boils down the finale to be Shiv vs Ken and that is a good thing (!) it makes the most sense, mainly because Roman tends to go along with things. He can't win his father's favor anymore, so he tries with his siblings and, by extension, he tries holding on to Logan as long as possible by doing that. That's his objective. Shiv's thing is proving herself as the most viable candidate. She can't prove it to Logan, so she will do it for anyone else. But Kendall's thing used to be positioning himself against Logan, and since that can't happen anymore, he becomes Logan. Or tries to, bear with me.
Roman brings up Kendall "big brothering" him in ep. 8, but it's very prevalent throughout season 4. But it is also very reminiscent of what their father used to do; keeping them very close and making them feel trusted only to become violent (in some form) when questioned in his authority. Clearest example is Ken feeling the tides turn against him and attacking his brother.
But the hug comes before that, and there are two very important aspects to this--
1) It is cruel and I don't think it matters if you think Roman wanted/needed it because, crucially, Kendall's endgoal with the violence isn't within that line of thinking. He is asserting his dominance (as seen by the second physical attack later).
2) BUT much more importantly: imo, the hug starts with the intention of comfort (!!!) and only ends in violence. This is Ken at his most Logan; a last goodbye to his brother from his father by combining violence and a loving embrace. He learned from the best.
Though in the end, what it comes down to, is this: Does Roman push his wound into the shoulder? Does Kendall press him against it? Both. You don't get Roman's "i hate you" without Kendall's "i love you". It's both. It will always be both, but I will say this-- hate can't come without love, but love can very much stand on its own. So, even if it's both, one of the two weighs heavier. 4 seasons of story have shown how one weighs heavier, even if it's unintentional.
#i've written a lot about shiv and roman's relationship because a) it makes me hopeful and b) their falling out (if you can call it that)#feels very minor and like a non-event#but the more i thought about ken and rome in the last few months the more i feel like their falling out might be more of a shock to us#and therefore feels much worse than it really is#like kendall is never indicated to be quite that violent and calculating in his violence BUT that might be the point#does it feel shocking and are you tempted to say out of character? good! it's kendall doing logan! it IS weird!#consider this my service to the kendallgirls i guess#because kendall and roman at the birthday party was also really fucking bad and two episodes later they are comforting each other#roman “betrayed” ken at the vote in season 1 and then picked him up from the drug den no bad blood#they are really at odds in the beginning of season 2 as well and look at how they end it!#succession#succession season 4#kendall roy#roman roy#shiv roy#logan roy
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#tw abuse#hi#im just lying down in the dark on a rainy day and need to vent here because I can’t get myself to journal#today i miss my mom so so much#I miss who she was before the drugs and alcoholism#she can be so nurturing and generous and kind when she’s not using#she couldn’t be the mother she was capable of being because of her addiction and severe mental health issues#I was emotionally and physically abused til I was 16 and the thing is#I don’t have hate or resentment for her#I only want the best for her#I just ache inside knowing that because she’s still in denial and addiction and we can’t have a relationship#I have no immediate family left and my extended family aren’t the nicest people#lately my ptsd has been triggered a lot and old trauma has been resurfaced#witnessing an incredible amount of domestic violence growing up still fucks with my head#it was so scarring#won’t get into details there but god it really did a number on me#the bottom line is I miss who my mom was before the alcohol and abuse#and more importantly#I miss myself#I miss laughing until I cried#I miss not running from everything#I miss letting myself feel#personal
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So you think manhunt gangs would come together for movie marathon, Which movies do you think would be each gang's favorite?
I've tried hard to have to make this as accurate as possible, knowing their erratic personalities and such.
The Hoodz - Heat (1995)
Various movies encapsulate not only a bank robbery but how intense a shootout is such as Heat.
The Hoodz have had their fair share of bank robberies (even the ones with a badge) and have had times where they didn't know if they were going to make it. They take notes but share a good beer while at it, reminiscing on the ‘good old times.’
The Innocentz - Scarface (1983)
This movie has it all.
Drugs, gang wars, corruption, death, murder, and the disillusionment of The American Dream. Coming from immigrant parents or being immigrants themselves, The Innocentz (or some of them) found themselves in Tony Montana’s shoes. They want to hit it big and become the next drug lord like that one guy in Liberty City. Then again, they all love to reference ‘Say hello to my little friend’ whenever they watch the movie and laugh about it like the coked-up druggies they are.
The Smileys - The Adventures of Elmo in Grouchland (1999)
The image of them SCREAMING at the screen in complete despair over Elmo losing his blanket is something I can see them doing.
It's what I did when I was younger so I can see every member doing the same and cursing any other character who bothered Elmo in the slightest. They take their valuables very seriously, especially Barry who holds his ‘daughters’ close to his heart, threatening anyone who dares to even touch them.
The Wardogs - All Quiet On The Western Front (1930)
There's a scene where the main character Paul is asked by his Professor to tell young men about his heroism and patriotism when he served in the war. At first Paul is hesitant as he has so words to say before he finally tells them the truth. The real truth. There is death. There is murder. There is no mercy. That is all.
“It’s dirty and painful to die for your country.”
And everyone calls him a traitor, a coward, an embarrassment of a soldier who should be proud to serve his country.
It's an anti-war movie, sure, but it stays with The Wardogs constantly even when they remember walking back to their hometowns after serving their time overseas.
Cerberus - Se7en (1995)
Let's be honest, these guys have faced the worst of the worst in their line of work.
They may work with Starkweather but they work with all sorts of stupid rich assholes who cause even the worst of crimes to each other. All because of the dumbest feuds, the mishandling of expensive products, and the greed of collecting the greens. Se7en displays a world they've seen countless times whether it be in their ‘normal’ job or the job they take shooting down who is against their boss. They’ve seen detectives look too far into their work, serial killers who tore into men/women/children for their sick desires, innocent people in the wrong place and time, and watch as the life in their lives fades away.
So a serial killer who bases his killings on the seven deadly sins is not far from what Cerberus has faced by far.
CCPD - Maniac Cop (1988)
Sometimes these guys watch even the most ridiculous films centered around cops just for the hell of it.
Whether it be for fun, to live through a power fantasy, or even just to watch countless people (innocent or not) die in horrific ways, it's still a classic for the whole precinct to watch this movie or watch the series in general. Watching a dead cop go on a killing spree across New York City while simultaneously setting fear into the hearts of men and women alike just brings absolute joy to the gang as a whole.
It's a classic, classics never die.
SWAT - Falling Down (1993)
All it takes is one bad day.
I’m sure that rigorous training, having to support a family with blood money, having to work with a very disgusting man who runs a snuff film industry, and having to kill people whether they were innocent or not will demonstrate some problems.
You get frustrated.
Upset.
Angry.
You want to be able to have things go your way but you can't and everyone looks at you like you’re selfish for it. You want to have a normal life and have a normal family outing but you’re plagued with images of corpses being rigorously shot at a far or close distance, their insides painting the walls. You feel like you’re going to lose it by your wife asking for more money, your kids wanting a new toy, or even the traffic blocking your way to your ‘regular’ job. You're going to lose your mind and you’re one bad thing away from grabbing that gun and letting lose on everyone who ever put their doubt into you.
But give the SWAT some credit, at least they have each other to vent out their frustrations when the pressure becomes too much.
The Skinz - None
No one asked them. No one likes them. They weren't even invited. If they rode up they’d be met with a rain of bullets.
Bonus!!!
The Camheadz - 8mm (1999)
This movie is about a snuff film.
I mean, I feel like this gang in particular plays a huge part in Mr. Nasty’s snuff films not because their heads are cameras but because I feel like each one of them has a distinct style in general.
Like, one wants to go after women, another goes after men, another the homeless, and so on. They all have their tapes, each inserted into their camera heads to record their best moments and to either save for themselves or to sell for a few more bucks. But let's be honest, they keep the tapes for themselves, just for personal reasons.
So to have a film perfectly demonstrates their lifestyle, even if it doesn't get everything right, it does play well into how deprived human beings can be just to get what they want.
The Clownz - It (1990)
I mean, duh, what else would they watch?
They saw the miniseries and studied the book like it was the Bible just to increase their obsession like the white-painted fiends that they are. Speaking out lines from the alien creature clown itself to either scare children or grown men alike.
We all float down here, Cash.
The Jury - Punishment Park (1971)
Imagine a world during the Vietnam War when President Nixon decreed that those who were ‘anti-war’ would be detained and forced to either spend time in jail or spend three days out in the desert being hunted down by police so that they may reclaim their so-called ‘freedom.’
That is Punishment Park.
A pseudo-documentary film that was highly controversial for its political views but is now highly regarded for taking a stance against the government. It seems like the kind of movie for The Jury knowing how they seem to take the law into their hands, display their political views, and see the movie like the manhunts they frequently did.
The Lost - Dark Days (2000)
Numerous movies depict the harsh and despairing reality of homelessness for those who are homeless.
It's a cold reality that millions of people face from the most remote or even the most popular of places. Always forgotten, always left behind, and always left in the dark. The Lost can heavily relate to this scenario not only because of the various reasons why and how they became the way they are and how. It's a normal day and night for Carcer City, just as bland and bleak as it has always been.
They can only dream of becoming as rich as Starkweather is but they’ll accept what they’re given, they don't have a choice.
#I used this ask to excuse the fact I watch a lot of movies#tw drugs#tw gun mention#tw gun#tw gun violence#tw violence#tw war#tw war mention#manhunt#manhunt ps2#ps2#manhunt hunters#manhunt gangs#manhunt 2003#the hoodz#the innocentz#the smileys#the wardogs#cerberus#ccpd#swat#the skinz#the camheadz#the clownz#the jury#the lost#rockstar#rockstar games
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hmmm.
in modern verse, sorti runs the escorting service faith works for. would explain why the mysterious man who approached and hired him doesn't really matter (he's an undead thrall anyway), and also why faith is so strong in his belief that exactly zero harm will come to him while he works for her, and even if he was, he would see some semblance of justice in the end. sorti's a complex woman - willing to commit unspeakable acts of violence and cruelty to get her way, but she's not an idiot. there's a time and a place for everything, and it's elementary: they'll perform better if they're not afraid, hooked on any substances, homeless, starving, or otherwise aggrieved. what's good for the goose is good for the gander anyway. a second chance in return for any inklings, whispers, implications, hints, rumors, references, anything that could possibly point her in the right direction. they were free to keep 100% of the money they earned, too, just as long as they did what she asked. such was the agreement with faith as well, in the end.
he doesn't care about all that though. he gives her every scrap of pertinent information he manages to squeeze out of certain clients, about the sanguine star or otherwise, though this is a treatment he reserves for clients he particularly dislikes (imagine what you'd have to do in order to find yourself in this category). he can keep a secret; the question is whether he will. self-preservation is arguably his strongest instinct and, if brought to tangible harm, he will divulge every secret he's gleaned, every single one - may hargraven and the fates have mercy on the stability of their life. one way or another, they won't be seeing him again. this is code for 'he isn't afraid to ruin anyone who abuses him, because sorti will do one of two things: kill them, or legally destroy them, no in between.' faith is also complex, happy to wash his hands of disliked clients the very minute he starts talking, but it isn't something he resorts to frequently. i'd say he's only done it once, and it's strictly, specifically because he was drugged and raped on two separate occasions, and he wasn't the only one. he's lucky he has excellent memory, damn near eidetic. otherwise, he's not so sure he nor any of the other victims would've seen any justice at all.
so there's a lot of give and take here. it's simple but complicated, and all very circumstancial. faith is a good person, but he's also incredibly flawed, willing to bear the shame so long as something is done about the people who victimize others. insodoing, the distance he's created between himself and the consequences of unpersoning someone else (regardless of context) deeply disturbs him. anyone could understand why a victim would kill their rapist, but taking someone's life, conceptually and in practice, is an entirely different matter, deserved or not. it isn't a righteous, triumphant feeling. it just makes him feel so sick, but something is better than nothing, and his morals are loose enough to accept what that means for him. vigilante justice, whatever form it takes, will always be faster than any sorcier or cop. he accepts everything about this even though it disgusts and even hurts him to. the logic is circularly punishing for him, so, for the most part, he simply ignores it. buries it a thousand miles under his cute, playful, freckly facade, makeup and shots of tequila (i lied, he drinks more than you think), and sex. expertly pretending everything is fine, getting up and going to work the next day as if nothing happened in the first place, he has never been touched by a violent man in his life or been spoiled in any way, no sir.
really helps that he gets to keep all of his earnings and maybe sometimes help others with just the right tidbits of information used at just the right times - and that he has very good friends in very high and low places.
#➥ Sortia.#➥ Faith.#rape mention /#drugs /#sex work /#/ sorti accidentally using her evil business powers for good#/ this poor traumatized man who is so tired of people hurting him#/ there's a lot going on here that's very complicated & difficult to navigate just as a topic so not going to pretend its handled perfectly#/ don't have to talk about this in threads or anything but it's#/ there#/ anyway once again calling toward and reaffirming faith's capacity for violence. revenge. and alignment as chaotic good#/ if you think about it i'm right#/ anyway don't take this as a sign sorti's good. it's just good business in her mind. protecting and providing for her employees#/ she's rich as hell since she's enfurious night's widow so it's whatever#/ seriously it's like an 800-year fortune. like unfathomable. money is basically worthless she has so much of it#/ anyway.
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they just didn't have to write him as "a great philanthropist"; "a generous benefactor of the empire bay planetarium"; "frequent officer of the empire bay press guild"; "a frequent target of political slander and false arrest because of generosity towards the press"
and at the same time write him as the first of the others to organize drug trafficking; a man who tried to kill all his competitors; "a shady bastard, even for guys in this business"; "ruthless modernizer"; a man who secretly views his close friend as a liability; "the man who killed his own boss" to take his place
"few will moan moretti's passing" from the lost heaven's newspapers and there's nothing like that in the cut-out news reports about carlo's death
#like do you remember . “Micky the Crab” who was falcone's soldier and whom falcone eventually left to clean the fucking toilets#when the guy lost almost all his fingers#and ofc i don't think this whole charade with charity and the press is sincere (can sense 100% money laundering w charity here) but#i think he still felt some appreciation for empire bay bc this city accepted & raised him instead of sicily#i believe that there were also good intentions with the planetarium and maybe other things#maybe not everything was just a money laundering#“your teeth are a gift from god u can sink them into anyone's flesh and call it an act of giving” this is what i mean#that fact that his fucking (ugly but still) MANSION is in a poor residential area it just feels like a slap#violently shaking carlo by his shoulders WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS!!!!!!!!! (gets shot right after)#the fact that he had a reputation as a shady guy among the mafia and a reputation as a philanthropist in society . carlo. why r u like this#this man is a fucking contradiction in some absolutely fucked up gross way and it's killing me. wouldn't want him any other way tho#m2#like can you imagine. if he actually felt warm towards empire bay. can you imagine if he was actually interested in making this place bette#but still organized the drug trade(which is objectively even worse than a racket)#love mixed with selfishness and violence and greed and and in the end it's creation mixed with destruction#sorry i can't get my thoughts into sentences that make sense all this week#but this contrast is killing me and i think about it a lot and i just wanted to put it together in a compilation
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hey, I hope I don't sound rude, but can you tag this post with alcohol/cw alcohol? I have a cotl friend who's sensitive to that sort of thing, (I LOVE YOUR ART BTW!! <3 <3 <3)
hello there anon! i am glad to hear you enjoy my art, however i cannot fulfill your request even though i understand where youre coming from
it is not my responsibility to make sure everyone is comfortable on the interwebs. i cant choose how anyone reacts to my art and i cant start tagging every single thing in every single picture
i find it entitled to think its proper to ask me of it. alcohol is an inescapable part of life. besides, Cult Of The Lamb has it as a game mechanic in the first place, anyway.
id just suggest for your friend to stay out of the fandom if it triggers them to the extent of a green bottle on a drawing being an actual issue. especially since the bottle that i have drawn might as well be a green kanes lemonade. it's just unnecessary for me to place a trigger warning on it.
i do hope your friend gets better. thank you a lot for the ask! have a nice day!
#cotl deals with dark themes#alcohol drugs smoking gore violence etc#there will be lots of art that i do myself or reblog that have something to do with it#i dont rly get the concept of having to tag each one when the fandom itself is built on a game that showcases it all#as one live laugh love quote goes#art should comfort the disturbed and disturb the comfortable or something like that pft#chirping
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bad karma
(After a meeting between the Phonetix and Fission Chips’ respective boards goes sour in the days following the break-in, Valentine takes matters into his own hands.)
“And you’re sure you won’t reconsider?”
Valentine’s voice was smooth, still pleasant and friendly in a way that made Jon’s skin itch with the urge to rip that mild, silken smile straight off of his face. When Jon paused, turning his head to shoot him a venomous glare, the man’s eyes were rounded, glittering behind his dark lenses- bristling, Jon’s frown twisted further.
“Yes.” He hissed, turning on his heel to look the man dead in the eye. “Fission Chips is my company- as long as I’m in charge, you and your dickhead board can shove it.” Gold teeth gleaming, Jon curled his lip for good measure. Usually, people knew to move along fast when he was in this kind of mood, but Valentine was a man who had seemingly never learned how to quit, and the earlier disaster in the joint meeting had soured what little self-control Jon had left for the day.
Nonplussed, the other man merely rolled his eyes, the mask briefly slipping loose for a moment as his smile twitched at the corners, revealing a hint of the bitter man Jon knew hid beneath that soft, smiling exterior. “I just…” his voice died off for a moment as he lifted one finger and tapped at his chin with one well-manicured nail, tilting his head as if in thought. “Well, how do I put this nicely? Let’s just say I understand some of your board’s concerns, given that recent little outburst of yours-“
“Fuck off.”
Jon’s voice cracked sharply in the middle as the white-suited man stalked forward, hand lifting to jab one gold-ringed finger into the other man’s chest. “You piece of fucking shi-“
“See?” Valentine interrupted. He stepped back, seizing Jon’s wrist in one smooth movement and digging his nails deep. Jon balked and tried to pull away, but the grip was like iron- the man sneered, the smooth purr of his voice beginning to bleed into something venomous and sinister. “So angry. You want to call me a piece of shit? You? You broke into my headquarters in the middle of the night, in a fit of insanity, and you have the audacity to try to pick a fight with me now?”
Jon blinked, taken aback by the sudden snarl etched across the other man’s features, a face he had never seen outside of closed doors. Valentine was a man who cared only for appearances- it was unlike him to bare his teeth in public, where anyone who happened to enter the hallway could see. Bristling, he attempted to rip his arm free, but Valentine only moved with him, shoving forwards just as he lifted his back foot, sending him off-balance and cracking his head into the wall.
“What the- are you crazy?” Jon spat, shoving furiously at the rival CEO. “Get off me-“
His words were cut off by a sharp groan of pain as Valentine twisted his wrist until he felt bone creak, bracelets clattering as he leaned close, mismatched eyes narrowed to slits- mismatched eyes that sparked fury in Jon’s stomach, hands clenched into fists with the urge to claw them from his skull entirely.
Those he knew to be real, at least.
Valentine towered almost a full head above him, all humor and niceties gone. His expression was cold and etched in vitriol, so unlike anything Jon had ever seen that, despite the fury coiling white-hot and terrible within him, the businessman felt… afraid.
Arno’s not here, he remembered. His bodyguard had been detained not long after Jon himself, on his way to flee elsewhere. He doubted he’d ever see him again. Fuck.
“Get… get off of me.” He gritted out, fighting not to flinch as the other dug his nails in harder, straight through the fabric to bruise the flesh beneath. The sting of it was sharp and familiar, and Jon’s heart began to quicken in his chest at the memory of screaming curses and fists raised to hurt, of doors frantically locked and rattling in their frames. That’s… that’s different, he reminded himself. This is business.
For a moment, neither moved or spoke. Jon glared at his rival, arm shaking with the urge to rip free- Valentine stared down at him, silhouette edged by the setting sun streaming through the windows. It’s almost six, Jon thought. Soon everyone would be gone for the day and he could finally go home and forget this nightmare for a few hours. He still had half a bottle left of the good stuff, and that was a start.
Valentine shut his eyes for a moment and breathed deeply, as if trying to collect himself- the smile didn’t return, and his grip only tightened around Jon’s arm, but when he blinked open his eyes, they had rounded out into a look of concern. “Look, Jon…” he started. “This business is clearly killing you- you’ve reached your breaking point. The man I met ten years ago would never have been so stupi- stressed that he would break into another company’s headquarters in plain view like this. You’ve never looked worse, and I doubt this fiasco has been good for the fragile state of your health.”
He reached down, and Jon felt a tap tap against the pill dispenser clipped to his belt. It rattled, and when Jon looked away, fury flickering to a brief look of frustration, he knew he was right.
“Step down,” Valentine murmured. “Do your company and staff a favor, and play it ‘hands off’ for a while- you’ve been doing this for, what? Fifteen years or so? Let someone else take the reins and go, I don’t know, smoke some of the good shit somewhere.” His voice took on a teasing note, heedless of the way Jon stiffened, eyes shining with rage. “Or pop something other than your prescriptions- it might do your connections a few favors. Nobody likes you sobe-“
His words were cut off as Jon, shaking with fury, suddenly shoved him back- the two broke apart, Valentine stumbling until his back hit the glass of the window, rattling the pane. Jon’s voice dripped with venom.
“Get out of my building-” he spat, teeth bared and snapping with each word. “You arrogant fucking prick.” He opened his mouth as if to curse further, but couldn’t find the words. His fingers twitched with the urge to wrap them around the other man’s throat and squeeze until he felt bone snap.
Valentine blinked back at him, eyes wide with shock. His glasses sat slightly ajar on his nose, knocked off-kilter- wordlessly, he reached up to fumble for them and set them back straight.
Jon turned on his heel, stalking down the hallway. His ears rang in time with his pounding heart, blood pulsing hot and fast through his skull. Biting his lip until he tasted blood, Jon pictured the cool dark of his penthouse, shades drawn, and a glass of bourbon in hand. It was an image that usually soothed the worst of his fury, but he found himself picturing crushed glass littering the floor instead, splinters sinking, sharp and stinging, into the flesh of his palm.
He couldn’t keep this up. Valentine was a cold, snake-hearted bastard- Jon knew more than most the mask he hid behind and what he became when the claws came out. The rivalry between Phonetix and Fission Chips was legendary. But he was, at least in part, right. What had happened was a step too far- Jon had made it this far in the world through brute force and will, the worst of his outbursts tempered by genuinely good tech, but there was only so much his lawyers could argue when it appeared to the entirety of the world that one Jon Spiro was-
‘I was never here’.
-actually fucking insane.
Jon’s train of thought was cut off by a sudden weight slamming into his back, sending him crashing to the ground. His chin cracked sharply against the carpet, teeth snapping shut with a painful click as his head was forced to the floor by a heavy hand.
“What the fu-“
He didn’t get the chance to finish, voice choking off into a groan of pain as Valentine’s knee slammed into his back, driving the air from his lungs. Jon twisted like a snake, gasping for breath, and kicked- the other man coughed as Jon’s shoe met his chest, but didn’t let go. Instead, his fist slammed into Jon’s side, a sharp burst of pain splintering through his ribs.
Wheezing, Jon was hauled up by the front of his shirt and dragged into a nearby office, empty of anyone now that the sun was setting. Teeth bared in fury, Valentine threw him across the desk, Jon crashing into the wall in a flurry of papers and pens.
“I tried to be nice,” the CEO hissed, odd eyes dark with fury. “And you have the audacity to call me a prick? You?”
Jon tried to lurch upright, swaying heavily- his vision blurred as he slumped back to the ground, fighting for breath. Valentine circled the desk, elegant fingers reaching up to unknot his tie as he rolled Jon onto his back with a savage kick to his lower back, straddling him to keep him there.
The man blinked stars from his vision, blindly trying to shove the other off of him. It was a pointless effort- Jon’s head was spinning, splitting with pain, and Valentine was far, far stronger than he was. His voice creaked as he struggled to shout, summon his guards, something. Hands seized his wrists and Jon thrashed, struggling to break free.
This time, Valentine’s fist caught him square in the jaw- Jon’s head snapped back, a rush of white noise drowning out everything but the pounding ache in his skull.
When he came to moments later, Valentine had taken both of his wrists in hand, using his tie as a makeshift rope to bind them together. Half-stunned, Jon blinked back at him, eyelids flickering like camera shutters. Dark blood smeared beneath his nose and lip, the taste of copper strong in his mouth.
“The difference between you and me, Jon, is that some of us put some effort into how the world sees them. Some of us want to be known as more than a fucking embarrassment.” Savagely, he yanked the knot tight and stood. Grabbing the man by the hair, he ignored the ensuing groan and dragged Jon to the center of the room. Jon’s back hit the floor with a thud and without hesitation, Valentine leaned back and drove his foot straight into Jon’s side.
Jon screamed, the sound muffled by a dress shoe slamming into the back of his skull, grinding his face into the floor.
Valentine sneered.
“Shut up.”
Jon slumped against the ground, sobbing for breath. Still blinking stars from his vision, he tried to force himself upright, jewelry clattering and pills rattling, utterly disoriented- his voice slurred in his mouth. “What… Val-“ he tried to choke out. What’s going on?
He fell back- Valentine’s shadow loomed above him, the man’s face blurred by the haze of his vision and the dim light of the room. Something in his stuttered words caused the man’s fury to spike- Jon could make out was eyes gleaming with rage and teeth bared like a wolf’s. His chest was heaving too.
“I said-“ He leaned back, raising one foot high.
“Shut up!”
His kick caught Jon right in the stomach, and the world dissolved into one bright, smearing blur of white-hot pain. He let out a short, shuddering scream, choking off into a strangled gasp as Valentine stamped down again and again, as hard as he could. His vision splintered entirely- the sounds that left him were no longer human, thin and strangled and tasting of blood.
A kick to the head. A kick to the side. Blow after blow, thudding into his body. He couldn’t move to defend himself, couldn’t summon the thought to, his mind devoid of anything but agony. Valentine only stopped when Jon went still, huddling against the floor. Crimson flecked his ivory suit, the glittering gold of his jewelry, and the sight of it was enough to startle Valentine out of his blind fury, for the moment.
Jon was shivering. His fingers twitched in spasms, tightening into fists in stops and starts- his body hitched with each breath. Valentine watched, odd eyes wide and unblinking, his fingers gripping the edge of the desk, white-knuckled, as he waited for the fury to ebb. He noticed a smear of red on the edge of his shoe, and his frown deepened. Heaving a deep breath through his nose, he crouched down.
Through the static blur of his senses, Jon could only just make out the distorted hiss of the other man’s voice and the sensation of sharp nails digging into his chin- a spiderweb’s thread of pain trickled up his jaw, and he groaned, head lolling in the other man’s grip.
Valentine huffed, rolling his eyes. His frown deepened, and wordlessly, he began unworking the knot of Jon’s tie, batting away his bound hands with ease. Pulling it loose with one hand, he began rummaging through his pockets with the other, pulling out a slim metal case.
“Maybe this will shut you up.”
There was a small click, and Jon then flinched as his mouth was forced open, Valentine’s thumb pushing between his teeth and pressing something to his tongue. The taste of it was bitter, and he balked, trying weakly to shove the other away.
Valentine’s fist closed around one wrist and pulled them away from him, the man leaning harder against Jon’s chest until the man stopped struggling.
After a few moments, the substance dissolved, acrid taste mingling with the tang of blood on his tongue- Jon wasn’t given much time to ponder it, silken fabric suddenly shoved in his mouth as Valentine used his own tie to gag him, wrenching his head to the side so he could knot it tight. The room fell silent, his sounds of pain or protest muffled and soon fading out entirely.
Valentine scrubbed his fingers clean on the lapel of Jon’s jacket before he stood, leaning back against the desk. One foot came to rest on Jon’s shoulder, but there was no force behind it- there didn’t need to be. The other man was beaten. Pulling a cigarette from the case before slipping it back into his pocket, the CEO quietly lit it and began to smoke, letting the taste of it soothe the rage still prickling at the tips of his fingers. He pulled out his phone and silently scrolled, occasionally tapping at the screen.
Jon’s eyes drifted shut, rolling back in his skull. The world melted into a haze of pain- the only sensation he could make out was the press of Valentine’s shoe to his sleeve. Dimly, he worried for the white of his suit. Nausea roiled with the pain in his stomach, what remained of his concentration focused on not vomiting.
After a little while, Valentine tapped at the screen again and put the phone to his ear, taking a deep drag of smoke and blowing it towards the ceiling. A thin crack of light shone through the door, set slightly ajar, and, as if noticing it for the first time, he quietly nudged it shut.
Jon wasn’t able to make out much of what was said- sense and thought were blurring together faster, something in the bitter taste on his tongue filling him with dread. The red static in his skull began to quiet, his senses empty of anything but the dull thump of his heart and the stuttering rasp of his breathing.
“…there’s been a change of plans… I’ll let you in, no one’s here right now… yes, that’ll do…”
Valentine looked down at his shirt, and his lip curled with a look of disgust- dark fabric was flecked darker, one finger smearing slightly with crimson as he dragged it down his collar.
“Bring my coat, if you wouldn’t mind. Things got a little… messy. Thank you.”
#this is non-canon to Valentine’s story but… sometimes you just wanna beat up your favorites. and that’s not to say it’s out of *character*#- for him.#i put a lot of little details into this one in regards to Val Jon and their dynamic with each other.#i wrote this solely for angst purposes and thus am too shy to put this on main for the moment but. hope you like it anyways!#fission’s fics#tw violence#tw blood#tw implied drug use#tw implied abuse#tw smoking#tw drugging#lots of tw this time!
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The Fascinating World of the Moldenhauer Bros. Cartoons (A Retrospective on a Forgotten Gem of Animation’s Golden Era)
Moldenhauer Bros. was a small animation studio of the 1920s and 30s, founded by brothers Chas and Jerry Moldenhauer, best known for their unique flagship character, Cuphead, who was often paired with his “pal” (or brother, depending on the cartoon), Mugman.
While the Moldenhauers enjoyed popularity in their heyday, after the implementation of the Motion Picture Production Code, the studio’s output, much of which had previously been reliant on violence, gambling and other such vices, began to gradually become blander and more watered down until they lost favor with audiences and had to close, becoming relegated to a footnote in animation history books.
Selected “Cuphead” Shorts
- The Cup-Heads: The debut of the earliest prototypes for Cuphead, Mugman and Elder Kettle. On a picnic basket-boat with a teakettle captain and a crew made up of other containers and dishes, two young teacup sailors try to complete all their tasks without bungling it up, which proves easier said than done.
- Forest Follies: Cuphead and Mugman get a job as milkmen. They are running late to deliver the milk to an old woman living out in the woods, so Cuphead suggests they go off the path and take a shortcut through the trees. They stumble upon a village of living plants who believe they’re being invaded and send out their military to fight back the boys.
- Treetop Trouble: Bugs have been getting into Cuphead’s garden. He wants to put a stop to it, so he follows them when they flee his old-timey bug spray gun. This leads him to a huge tree which the bugs (including some rather big bugs) have made into an apartment building. Cuphead goes to talk to the bug king, a dragonfly, about leaving his garden alone and the king challenges him to a duel, which Cuphead eventually wins using his old-timey bug spray gun.
- Funfair Fever: Cuphead, sick of life at home having to listen to adults, decides to run away and join the circus. However, he soon learns that working in the circus is not as much fun as he expected. The workers are harsh to him and rather than letting him do glamorous things like be a trapeze artist, strongman or lion tamer, he has to sell snacks, perform with the clowns and sit in the dunk tank. When he decides to run back, the circus folk chase after him, but he just narrowly makes it home, safe and sound.
- Funhouse Frazzle: Cuphead goes to a funhouse and laughs at his warped reflection in the funhouse mirror. However, being laughed at makes the reflection mad and it pulls him through the mirror into a bizarre, madcap world of living toys, weird creatures and generally surreal experiences. He eventually makes it out, but is extremely shaken by the experience, breaking the mirror.
- Rugged Ridge: Set in medieval times. Cuphead and Mugman are two young boys who wish to become great knights. The king, who doesn’t like them very much, says that if they can get to the top of Monster Mountain and defeat the Cyclops that lives there, he’ll let them. Overjoyed, they immediately set off, promising not to let him down. He chuckles, expecting never to see them again. The boys make their way up Monster Mountain, using their wits to defeat the various beasts they come across. Eventually, they reach the Cyclops and trick him into the ruins of an ancient building, filled with debris so that he trips and gets stuck. They tie him up, and drag him back to the king, who begrudgingly grants them knighthood.
- Perilous Piers: Cuphead and Mugman are goin’ fishin’! They’ve agreed to have a contest to see who can catch the most fish. They both have the same bright idea to cheat by buying some especially potent bait from a mysterious traveling merchant pig who’s recently arrived in town. Once the day of the contest arrives, each brother feels very self-assured, confident that their newly-bought bait will give them the upper hand over the other. What they weren’t counting on, is that the combined smell of each of their super-bait purchases attracts all manner of strange sea creatures who are now after the two of them. Putting aside their competitive spirits, the pair work together to overcome this legion of aquatic life.
- The Mausoleum: While traveling through a terrible storm, Cuphead and Mugman take shelter in a mausoleum. Unbeknownst to them, the mausoleum is inhabited by a gang of ghosts who like to cause mayhem and play tricks on the unsuspecting boys. Luckily, one ghost whom the brothers freed from an urn without realizing keeps saving them at the last minute. Cuphead and Mugman, of course, don’t notice any of these supernatural goings-on until the end. This cartoon was rereleased twice.
- All Bets Are Off: The Cup Brothers discover a mysterious and tempting casino, each room of which contains a different anthropomorphic vice and/or casino entertainer. They keep coming across the manager of the casino, a singing, dancing, rotoscoped man with a die for a head. Eventually, they discover that he’s a demon in disguise, trying to get them to gamble their souls away. They have to flee from him and all the casino inhabitants.
- One Hell of a Time: Cuphead finally kicks the bucket and (to no one’s surprise, really) ends up in Hell. Thankfully, they give him one phone call, which he uses to ring up Mugman and formulate an escape plan. Mugman sneaks in and the two traverse through Hades. Just as they reach the gates, who should show up, but the Devil himself! The two little mugs use all their pluck and rascally ways and manage to outwit him, bringing Cuphead to the land of the living once more. This cartoon was also rereleased as Don’t Deal with the Devil.
- The King’s Leap: Miss Chalice falls asleep playing chess and dreams of being in a chess kingdom where the king is holding a tournament for all his subjects. She makes it to the final round, but has to fight the irate queen, who has been betting against her. Upon defeating her, Chalice is crowned the new ruler of the chess kingdom and wakes up.
- One Hell Of A Dream: Cuphead falls asleep in a graveyard and has a surreal nightmare about angels and devils.
- A Dish To Die For: A Hansel and Gretel-type tale wherein Cuphead, Mugman and Miss Chalice are traveling and arrive at a seemingly empty town. Searching around, they do manage to find one inhabitant, a saltshaker chef who invites them in for sweets, an offer they eagerly accept. Only after entering, engaging in several gags with various items and ingredients in the bakery, and narrowly escaping an assortment of unnoticed traps and sneak attacks by the chef do they realize he plans to turn them into the promised desserts. In the end, the trio escapes as the bakery collapses. (In true fashion of the animation at the time, this chef character would reappear in later cartoons, despite seemingly dying at the end of his debut.) This cartoon was also rereleased as The Delicious Last Course.
Selected Stand-alone Shorts
- Botanic Panic: A garden of sentient vegetables tries to avoid being picked and eaten.
- Ruse of an Ooze: A blob cheats his way through a boxing tournament by shapeshifting, taking pills to grow larger, and even faking his own death.
- Threatenin’ Zeppelin: An aviator is terrorized by a troublesome blimp-witch after they “trespass” in her airspace.
- Clip Joint Calamity: A bumbling frog duo (Showing clear inspiration from Steinbeck’s George and Lennie) try (and fail) various methods of sneaking into a riverboat club run by flies to eat the patrons.
- Floral Fury: In a society of sentient plants, a group of policemen try to thwart and discover the identity of the mysterious leader of a group of flower gangsters, who turns out to have been hiding in plain sight.
- Sugarland Shimmy: The rulers of Sugarland suddenly fall ill, leaving their bratty daughter in charge. Her group of evil advisors try to manipulate her, but she refuses to listen to them, instead making their lives miserable. Eventually, they find her so insufferable that they turn themselves in and provide the antidote to the poison they slipped the former rulers.
- Carnival Kerfuffle: A curious clown causes various mischief at the carnival where he works while trying to avoid being fired by his no-nonsense boss.
- Pyramid Peril: A grave robber discovers a lamp containing a genie. He takes it, thinking all his problems are over, but the genie constantly gets him in trouble and chooses the worst possible interpretations of his wishes. Eventually, he gets so frustrated that he sneaks it back into the pyramid, and all’s well that ends well. At least, until another grave robber finds it at the end... (This short has been scrutinized in later years for its conflation of Arabian and Egyptian culture.)
- Aviary Action: A giant bird with a hair-trigger temper struggles to raise his troublemaking insufferable genius of a son.
- Fiery Frolic: A knight tries to rescue a princess from a lonely dragon who kidnapped her for some company.
- Honeycomb Herald: A look inside the offices of a newspaper run by a hive of bees.
- Shootin n’ Lootin: A pirate visits a kingdom of sea creatures and ends up taming a whale, which he then uses as a ship. Has a framing device of pirates swapping stories at a bar.
- Murine Corps: A group of militaristic mice sneak into a house through use of a Trojan Cat and proceed to wreak havoc on the homeowners.
- Junkyard Jive: A mad scientist creates a robot from scrap to take over the world, but he finds the robot is only interested in being an entertainer.
- High Seas Hi-Jinx: A group of sailors try to escape from the giant attention-crazed mermaid who has wrecked their ship for a captive audience.
- Dramatic Fanatic: A play is being put on, but behind-the-scenes, things keep going wrong and everyone is scrambling to keep the audience from finding out.
- Railroad Wrath: A criminal trying to escape the police accidentally stows away on a train to the afterlife, upon which the various ghosts and ghouls torment him before dragging him off to the Land of the Dead with them.
- Gnome Way Out: A merry band of gnomes discover a mountain cave rich with gold, however, when they begin to mine it, it gives a toothache to the sleeping giant that the mountain is in reality, and he wakes up, swallowing them whole. The rest of the cartoon is the gnomes exploring the giant’s inner workings attempting to find a way out before a short battle between them and him once they escape.
- Snow Cult Scuffle: A traveler wandering through a snowstorm comes across a building made of ice. They try to enter for some shelter, but are locked out, with a sign saying “MEMBERS ONLY”. They eventually sneak in by picking away at the walls, but stumble upon the secret proceedings of a blizzard wizard and his loyal legion of animate snowmen, who spot the traveler and chase them around.
- High-Noon Hoopla: A corrupt cowgirl cow girl travels in her mobile saloon to a down-on-its-luck town, claiming to be a sheriff, and scams everyone out of their valuables before they revolt and make her into sausages.
- Doggone Dogfight: A literal dogfight between a bulldog pilot and another canine flying ace. When the bulldog finds out his opponent is female, he falls madly in love with her and a flash-forward at the end shows them with four jet-powered pups.
- Bootlegger Boogie: Ant cops get a tip-off and raid a bug speakeasy. They dispose of the spider gangster running it, his fly flunkies, an insectoid singer and a drunken caterpillar who got roped in, only to be taken out by the man behind the man: The snail MC, who rides in on an anteater.
Other Moldenhauer Bros. Characters
- Ms. Chalice: Originally conceived as the ghost who protected Cuphead and Mugman in The Mausoleum, the design was then reworked and used as a fun-loving addition to the cast- Sometimes a friend, sometimes a love interest, sometimes in a completely unrelated role.
- Elder Kettle: A wise (but often confused or goofy) old teakettle, typically cast as some sort of oft-exasperated authority figure for Cuphead and Mugman. Parent, grandparent, mentor, teacher, monarch, leader, etc.
- Porkrind: A snake-oil salesman pig who rides into town peddling bottles of “Miracle Medicines” that have bizarre effects on anyone who drinks them.
- Chef Saltbaker: A jolly chef with a salt shaker for a head. Originally appeared as a one-off character who invited Cuphead, Mugman and Miss Chalice to his bakery for sweets and ended up trying to make them into tarts, he then became a semi-recurring adversary.
- Mac: The Moldenhauer Studio’s original star character. Once the Cup Brothers took off, Mac was reworked into a supporting character for them, sometimes acting as the slightly goofy, easygoing third to Cuphead’s brashness and Mugman’s timidity.
- Chip: The Moldenhauer Studio’s second major character, after Mac, but before Cuphead and Mugman. During his rise to popularity, Chip was usually teamed up with Mac- Having Mac as the straight man to contrast with Chip’s more scrappy nature. After Cuphead became the studio’s major crowd-pleaser, Chip’s tough-guy aspect was played up and he started being cast as a friendly (or otherwise) rival to the cocky crockery.
- Quint: A stingy, surly coin. Was often portrayed as the no-nonsense employer of Cuphead (and Mugman, when applicable) and would usually end up suffering as a result of their shenanigans.
- Canteen Hughes: A wacky inventor who would often enlist Cuphead and/or Mugman’s help in his latest experiment or project. It rarely ended well for them.
- Angel: A minor character in a cartoon about hunting ducks: As Cuphead is looking for a good spot to lie in wait, he passes a fish fishing in the lake. Later, he thinks he sees a duck and fires his gun, only for the same fish to come up to him a few seconds later, kick him into the lake and walk off disdainfully, revealing a dorsal fin shot full of holes.
- The Four Mel Arrangement: Appear as a running gag in a cartoon where Ms. Chalice gets kidnapped and Cuphead has to go rescue her. They show up early on, singing, and then keep popping up to sing the song out of increasingly unlikely places in the middle of tense moments during the short.
- Quadratus: Appeared in a cartoon where Cuphead and Mugman go for a walk and get lost in a spooky forest. They come across a pond. A giant, creepy old man head pops out of it and sings a jazzy song about all the ways you can die. After the sequence is over, they quickly run for home.
- Ginger and Buster: The protagonists of a stand-alone short about a pair of gingerbread people who come to life and try to navigate the proportionally-giant house, encountering various hazards and getting separated once or twice in the process.
- Lucien: The main character of a stand-alone short in which a professor gives a class. The students constantly interrupt and try his patience until he freaks out.
- Cora: Appeared in a cartoon wherein Cuphead and Mugman are sailors who keep getting bamboozled by a crafty, clever pirate girl.
- Tully: Appears in the last black-and-white Cuphead short. It starts with Cuphead’s girlfriend catching him in a fight and telling him that if he doesn’t clean up his act and stop scrapping all the time, they’re through. Cuphead promises to quit fighting, but isn’t sure he can do it. He walks the streets despondent, wondering what to do, when a little turtle pops up and says he can help him become peaceable. Cuphead then spends the short almost getting into several fights. Every time, however, the little turtle shows up and stops him, causing Cuphead to get completely beat up by whoever he was going to tussle with. At the end, a roughed-up Cuphead encounters the turtle once more, and, is so sick of pacifism, that he beats him up.
- Silverworth: Appears in the first color Cuphead short. A high society man throws a party and the inivitation meant for a pair of sophisticated gentlemen accidentally gets delivered to Cuphead and Mugman. They arrive at the party, are taken for the gentlemen it was addressed to, and proceed to wreak havoc.
- Ludwig and Wolfgang: Appeared in a stand-alone short about a man who loves nothing more than to listen to classical music on his gramophone. One day, however, he brings home a brand-new radio, and starts listening to music over it, instead. The gramophone gets jealous, and starts trying to sabotage the radio, hoping to reclaim its spot as the man’s favorite pastime.
- The Boatman: First appeared as a gag in Shootin n’ Lootin, where the pirate is lost in unfamiliar waters. As he looks at his map, trying to figure out where he is, he sees a small passing boat, in which a cloaked ferryman is transporting three skeletons, who wave to him. The pirate immediately turns tail and speeds his ship in the opposite direction as fast as he can. The gag was later reused in various other cartoons involving boat travel.
- Buckley: A cat newsboy who stars in a cautionary tale about telling lies.
- Senita: A character created as a framing device for cartoon rereleases; an anthropomorphic cactus telling stories around a campfire.
- Inspector Graves: A ghostly detective who was the star of a one shot cartoon. He was “better known” (for a given value of the term) for receiving a regular newspaper strip, “The Peculiar Cases of Inspector Graves”, that lasted several years.
- Lumin, Digby and Prynne: Appearing in the short The Great Mountain Race, they were the three contenders most focused on. Not given much characterization beyond their bitter rivalry which is resolved by short’s end.
- The Honorable Judge Wise: An owl who served as the judge in a standalone short about various forest creatures holding a murder trial. (The short is rather loose about using animals that actually all live in the same habitat.)
#unreality#cuphead#roll the bones#tw gun mention#tw gun use#ask to tag#rubberhose#old cartoons#classic cartoons#tw poison mention#tw death mention#tw murder mention#tw cartoon violence#tw bug mention#tw clown mention#tw drug use mention#?#tw child endangerment#tw kidnapping mention#tw cult mention#tw alcohol mention#sheesh that’s a lot#i hope i got everything#cartoons#bones’ writing
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i wonder if the demographic + area where the school is located determines/influences the policies on leaving during the day
#bc my school locked the doors during the day and we were NOT allowed to open them for people#like you were told not to & there were signs telling you not to#even for classmates like it was strictly prohibited lol#& again u simply were not allowed to leave#& my school was located near the highway in an area with lots of gun violence#but there’s another piece too: school administration is white but the student demographic is pretty mixed & i have a suspicion#that the recent adoption of metal detectors and more frequent drug searches are bc of that if u pick up what i’m throwing down idk#i hear all abt this stuff bc one of my siblings is still in high school so#anyways. just some musings
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I Never Knew How to Save You
"So, you’re happy. [...] One year ago today, you got ten of our brother’s killed, and you’re happy."
Part 2 of Always One Bad Day Away (Part 2 of the series Billy Butcher - A Prequel)
Word count: ~8.5k Rating: Mature
A/N: It's me again! Feedback is always greatly appreciated ;D
Tag list: @amethystpagan
“You want the garlic minced or pressed, luv?”
“Definitely minced! I don’t think I even own a garlic press.”
“I was afraid you’d say that.”
Becca chuckled at Billy’s exhausted sigh as she bustled about the kitchen, always keeping an eye on the boiling pasta. She’d put him in charge of cutting vegetables, half of which he’d never even heard of before. It should have been at least a bit disconcerting how skilled he was with a knife while being all fingers and thumbs when it came to cooking. For some reason it wasn’t, though. Becca wasn’t the best of cooks, either, but at least she knew how to follow basic recipes.
Keep reading on AO3.
#liz writes#the boys#the boys fanfic#Billy Butcher/Becca Butcher#Billy Butcher#Becca Butcher#Sam Butcher#Connie Butcher#original characters#hurt/comfort#whump#fluff if you squint#canon typical violence#past character death#lot's of swearing#drug use#introspection#trying and failing to write a cockney accent i'm so sorry#creative punctuation#adverbs abound#story: Always One Bad Day Away#series: Billy Butcher - A Prequel
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