#lord of hell himself
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Hello
This ship is part of my serotonin now 💕💕
#RadioApple#the radio demon#lord of hell himself#alastor#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel radioapple#appleradio#alastor x lucifer#lucifer x alastor#fanchild#fankid#love child
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plot bunnies about an idea i don’t have enough motivation juice to write. red hood identity reveal variety
smol jason
So, Red Hood reclutantly working alongside the Bat to take down a child trafficking ring when he is hit with a de-aging spell. It even isn’t the first time Batman encountered the end of this particular spell so he already knows the victim would have no recollection of their memories, so he protects the now child (he guessing 11 estimate age) and guides him through the panic of not being able to take off the Red Hood helmet. the one that canonically has a bomb in it (cause older Jason is a dramatic bitchTM) so like, Batman catches the child’s prying fingers and takes them away from the latches because Hood has implied the existence of a bomb and that’s enough for dread to set in his gut. Bruce gently coaxes the child to let him confirm this with a device he takes out of his belt and raises it eye level to the kid’s head. It beeps. And B feels the ground sweep out under him. Because indeed this child has a bomb to his head. (and he’s suddenly hearing another bomb go off in the distance and a warehouse and —)
anyways, B ends up taking (read kidnapping) this twelve year old to the Batcave so they can pry off the helmet and I can only picture the ANGST because this is Jason and Bruce each unaware of who the other is. Jason still lives in the streets in his mind according to him and well, according to B, he’s dead. So they start bonding, kinda awkwardly at first cuz of the helmet’s voice modulator, but Jay at that age (at any rlly) was a spitfire and like he genuinely makes B forget this is a crime lord for a second (kinda difficult to that when the kid is stuck in the helmet) but whatever. I can only see Jason being his cautious self but kinda being at ends here because he kinda does need Batman’s help to get this thing off him, so he can only, just like narrow his eyes when the Bat approaches him for a blood sample. (“Need to check for magic residue, lad.”)
(Jason’s only allows this because he has a knife he found in the clothes he’d was drowning in earlier)
As u can guess, Bruce was obviously lying and wanted to run the blood sample to see if it matched any from his database (as the Red Hood has also implied that they have met before)
Anyways Bruce just gets the alert that the blood reading was finished almost at the same time they can pry the helmet off, and because he got a little attached, he just wants to see the face of this lively if wary teenager that has the same name as his (dead) son. (he managed to pry it from him earlier, how, i dunno) It’s literally Bruce’s martyr and huge guilt-complex that goes like ‘ah yes let me see the face of a child that was failed so throughly by the people who should’ve taken care of him’. So they pry off the helmet and then Bruce feels like he’s been doused by cold water. it’s like he’s staring at the ghost of his dead son again, the image completed with ruffled hair, slightly upturned lips and blue guarded eyes that look up to him with recognition but not recognition.
Bruce immediately hardens, shuts down any hope he can feel rushing in and desperately tries to close the dam and let his confusion and rage turn into anguish. “Who are you?”
The boy—the imposter quickly tracks the 180 demeanor change and immediately goes defensive. A painfully familiar scowl appears in his face.
“I’m Jason, I already told you that, what, your old age catching up to you?”
Batman stalks closer and then the boy’s taking two steps back for every one the Bat takes. He tracks the loose outline of a hand closing in tightly around the hilt of a knife in the boy wearing his son’s face and he can only think how dare he.
“Lies! You’re not my son! Who are you?”
Heart in throat, Jason struggles to keep distance between him and the towering black shadow that’s so angry he can sense it in his very bones. He doesn’t understand.
He doesn’t.
“I-I my name’s Jason. Jason Todd. My father is Willis Todd, not—not, Batman.”
And there’s that for the little snippet. Sorry this is so disjointed😭. After that’s just the mental image of Dick cutting in with Zatanna trailing closely behind him and being all “Hey I got your message about a de-aging spell and—“ and just stopping at the scene.
Because that’s Batman towering over a clearly scared kid. Said kid using the distraction to try and stab Batman. The action clearly enraging Batman—that doesn’t make any sense?! B would never— Dick immediately sprints into action and steps in between the two.
like Dick just giving his back to the kid and not seeing. Batman clearly shaking his head in denial and snarling, treating the kid like his crime lord self and Dick not understanding. Having to receive help from Zatanna to get the kid the hell out of here (but like where would they even take him? The manor??)
Zatanna just takes them to the other side of the cave and takes note of the teenager. How he has a dead grip on a red helmet and his gaze is stuck upon it.
Meanwhile Dick has to physically restrain Batman from going after the kid and he raises his voice just enough to demand what the hell is happening?? Why is there a kid in the Batcave? …Batman??? Report. As he is demanding answers Dick had slowly loosen his grip on his dad only to now found him staring at his gauntlet’s data hologram.
The information displayed? 99.98% Match confirmed to Jason Peter Todd.
So as this is clearly pure angst, I want Jason to lash out, sticking only to Zatanna only to realize she’s the magic user that’ll quote on quote will return him back to normal.
Jason is just like on really uneven ground here, even though he doesn’t think he’s ready to retur. But then Batman is just like “Jaylad” … “Jay…” and taking off his cowl and reaching up to him and looking at him like he knows him, like he’s something fragile and precious. Which is sooo fucking jarring you can understand. Jason internally is all what the fuck
Jason just wants them to back off. Jason is an overwhelmed bean. He looks up to Nightwing for help but the man is also mirroring the Bat, domino off and eyes suspiciously bright.
Zatanna is literally the only person in the room not emotionally compromised. She’s with Jay in the ??? train.
Suddenly she looks down and there’s the little boy whose eyes are pleading in helpless confusion. Eyes practically conveying the question you can return me back to normal right?? he pointedly doesn’t rip his eyes from hers as Zatanna puts a hand on his shoulder, pretending she doesn’t notice how he trembles and wordlessly asks if he’s sure.
cut scene
Bruce interrupts because information overload and he can’t compartmentalize this is too important and he and Dick stop Zatanna to which she too is ?? because that was literally what she was called for here. Dick is no help.
Dick is torn.
#jason todd#additional angsty route the sequel#B honest to god debating over returning jay to his normal age#turning the question round and round over how the hell did his baby boy turn into a crime lord???#(he’s having a moral battle with himself)#me: *wacks him* because his SON is right there HUG HIM#instead of asking irrelevant questions tt#but yeah triple angst for Jason because it’s a whole different type of hurt that his dad wouldn’t want him as he is#he’s not twelve anymore he died and he deserves to make amends with that#he came over the other side and he deserves people who accept him ragged over the edges as he is now😭😭#seriously I super apologize for having u guys read this disjointed piece of an outline#if you made it all over here that is#JSJ is cause i first put this on discord and so on tumblr format it got a little skewed#anyways#the plot bunnies attack again and i can’t write the movie#and i got a whole saga stacked#batman#dc#bruce wayne#dick grayson#zatanna#they’re all having a bad time your honor#fic outline#red hood#de aging#de aged jason
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sometimes I'm just vibing and then my brain screams at me "ALL THAT PAIN AND MISERY AND LONELINESS AND IT JUST MADE THEM KIND" and I go a little bit feral
#the ultimate doctor who thesis statement#the one thing that every doctor holds true to no matter how much they drift into oncoming storm/time lord victorious territory#twelve in hell bent/all of s12#ten sacrificing himself for wilfred in end of time#all of nine but specifically in doctor dances/parting of the ways- just this once everybody lives/cowardly anytime#eleven to baby amy but also with the flesh/children/vincent etc#thirteen tries so hard all the time but really shows up in it takes you away/resolution#they sometimes fail at being kind (the doctor is a hypocrite at their very core) but they always try#ninth doctor#tenth doctor#eleventh doctor#twelfth doctor#thirteenth doctor#doctor who#meta
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can't stop fucking thinking about sun/moon shuggy bc shanks is the sun always and buggy is forever the moon. buggy will never be the sun, he will never shine as brilliantly as shanks or anyone else. and the moon makes no light of it's own!!!! it only shines bc the sun's light reflects off of it!!!! buggy never shines by himself!!! he will never make his own light!!! buggy who is always second best, shining only from the light shanks gives him. even worse, you only ever see half of the moon illuminated at one time!!!! shanks who gives buggy the light he needs to shine but only for certain parts of buggy!!!! never all of him!!!!! buggy never shines fully and he never will bc buggy is the moon, he isn't a star or a comet or a meteor, he's a moon and moons don't shine by themselves. and buggy who devotes himself to shanks bc he wants to shine, by god he wants it so badly he aches somedays, but shanks is the golden child, shining with splendor, and buggy knows when to stop fighting a losing battle. he sticks around for years drawn in by the gravity of shanks' orbit until loguetown, and as his captain's head hits the ground, buggy feels himself splinter into thousands of little meteoroids. he leaves shanks standing in the rain and thinks to himself, i will shine by myself or i will die trying
#oh my god sun/moon shuggy makes me insane#me in the corner of my kitchen rocking myslef and whispering: he shines only with the light shanks gives him#and how crazy is that even in this buggy is still second best???#and the moon is only illuminated a half at a time!!! shanks who provides but not enough!!!#never enough!!!#and the moon moves father away from earth every year! buggy who slowly distances himself from shanks until there's nothing left!!!#and the thing about meteors is that they burn up in the atmosphere!!!#but just for a moment they are the most amazing thing in the night sky#buggy who would've given up everything for shanks bc shanks was his roger!!#he would've followed shanks into hell if shanks asked him but shanks looks to him in lgtwn and says he doesn't care about the op#how heartbreaking it must've been for buggy to look at this boy he's followed since childhood bc lord knows buggy wasn't enough#but shanks who is the prodigy the golden child the favorite for as long as buggy has known him#and child!bug looking at all the potential shanks shows and looking at himself and realizing that he will always pale in comparison to shnk#that anything he achieves will always be in the shadows!!#oh the voices the fucking voices#one piece#buggy the clown#buggy one piece#op buggy#akagami no shanks#shanks one piece#op shanks#shuggy#shanks x buggy
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Anyways--do you think Asmodeus picks his champions based on how much they remind him of his siblings?
Cause like, obviously Zerxus The Redemption Paladin has Everlight parallels. But also Asmo quite explicitly compared him to the Dawnfather with the whole arrogance thing, not to mention the whole paternal projection/condescension thing he's got going on.
And also, Teven Klask kinda fits this model too in a weird way??? Like, his stern demeanor and big ego is also kinda Dawnfather??? From a very outsider perspective that is, like if all you knew about him was the temple at Hearthdell. (Obviously Teven is nothing like the Dawnfather in actuality). He fits the model very loosely, but I don't get the vibes that he's one of Asmo's favorites anyways so maybe there's more leeway.
Also, both Zexus and Teven are big strong paladins, and I'm just gonna say, Dawnfather in his most classical depictions (not talking baby boi Ayden, here) matches that description pretty well.
Asmo, buddy, I think your obsession is showing.
#he says hes over them but all evidence points to the contrary#imagining a whole gaggle of big beefy hell champions#all of whom bear suspicious resemblance to asmo's siblings#do you think they have report meetings?#is there a break room where they hang out off duty?#people think zerxus is the outlier but what if its actually teven klask#just a host of morally conflicted. miserable paladins + teven klask whose really enjoying himself#no i dont count braius in this analysis he just met his god like yesterday#asmodeus the lord of the nine hells#asmodeus cr#cr asmodeus#the lord of the hells#teven klask#zerxus ilerez#critical role#cr3
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the last unicorn post from earlier has me thinking about the master. that yana is still in there, you know? is still someone he was, if even for a brief flash across the life of a time lord. there’s no way to unlive that life. there are ways to twist it later, sure, to make utopia into hell on earth. but the life was lived. in much the same way that the doctor can remember, can feel, the love he held onto as john smith even as that life is ripped out of his hands. the doctor choose denial and then grief and then to shutter it all away. and so john smith died, and so professor yana died, and the doctor and the master live on. the doctor has done this before, and he lives in orbit around humanity, trying to keep the best parts of them and hold them deep enough to take root (which he can pretend he gets to choose, as a time lord. as a human, it all floods in and can’t be dug back out.) but what about the master, right?
to borrow a turn of phrase: i think there are two time lords left in the universe, and they both learned how to regret.
#regret here meaning less feeling the emotion of actual regret obviously because time lords do not actually funxtion on unicorn rules. they#already get sad just fine on their own. no humanity needed for that.#but i dont know. i just dont think he brushed it off so easily. i think he did a hell of a job convincing himself he did.#and what better way then to twist his own great works and destroy the species he was working so hard to save at the end of the universe.#but what about the knowledge that he *could* be that person. that somewhere in him exists a version that wanted to save people.#a version that is painfully too much like the doctor. even. now is that part worse or better than the human part?#but if past regenerations are ghosts i think yana deserves a haunt.#anyway maybe ignore this one im rambling about nothing here#theres just. i dont know. what if you were the last of your kind and in surviving you made yourself Not Like Them in a way you’ll never#escape.#i mean doctor who is just so concerned with all these plots about hybrids and children of the tardis and clones and What Makes A Time Lord.#but they’re so obsessed with it in just. a very Lore way. is what it feels like. we get brushes of more like with jenny and how she’s#physically a time lord and the doctor denies her that inheritance. a shared suffering…#but me myself im just fascinated with the doctor and the master as the time lords who survived. but they survived Wrong#its. its. children of gallifrey that don’t belong to her anymore. you know?#i dont care if river’s got time lord dna!!! or the metacrisis is physically human!!! i dont care!!! talk to me about what it means beyond#their blood and bones!!! what’s it like to have your sense of self stripped from you like that!!!#what’s it like when so much of you is the shed skin of time lords past. but one of you was human. one of you was painfully *humiliatingly*#human!!!#enough about how much dna you need to count as a time lord. i want to know how much they can mutate until they can’t be recognized as one.#does that make sense?
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Okay I haven't talked about Judas OR the Judas album in a while so I'm going to share this analysis I finally placed and I'm losing my mind about
In the song Field of Blood (song 5,) the chorus ends with a line I've never quite been able to find a suitable conclusion about. Right. (Putting my rambling under a read more, the screenshots make this long)
Oh, okay, "what is my god," he's having a crisis of faith. Why is God so cruel as to order Jesus be killed (reminder that the album is a mix of biblical and Gnostic canon, where Jesus asked Judas to be the one to betray him.)
WRONG
If we move two tracks ahead in the album to Death is Just a Kiss Away, right before the last chorus we have these lines:
Which is insane! Because this part is actually saying "you have two gods, God and Jesus" (sun and moon, as I'll get to) "and no matter which you choose" (obeying the kill command or refusing to kill Jesus) "you're going to piss everyone off"! Okay now I know, "but where did you get sun and moon/God and Jesus" and HERE I TELL YOU:
Jesus is CONSTANTLY referred to with constellation imagery! (There's a whole song about it!) The Gospel of Judas includes the quotes (from Jesus) "Judas, your star has led you astray" and "the star that leads the way is your star." The album takes this and RUNS with it. Makes Jesus Judas's guiding star. There is SO MUCH night/star symbolism going on here, mostly in Constellation, but also from A World Where we Belong:
SO BASICALLY: considering that Jesus is heavily referred to with night sky imagery and they're literally both referred to as "two moons aligned," it isn't unreasonable to conclude that the line from Just a Kiss Away is in fact talking about God/Jesus. WHICH MEANS
When Judas is about to hang himself and he pleadingly asks "what is my god?"
HE DOESN'T KNOW IF IT'S GOD OR JESUS BECAUSE HE'S FUCKING IN LOVE WITH HIM APNDOANSOANS HE OBEYED GOD BECAUSE HE'S GOD BUT HE'S KILLING HIMSELF OVER JESUS. I HAVE MANY OTHER LINES ABOUT THIS (DEVOTION TO JESUS, NOT GOD) BUT THAT'S A DIFFERENT TOPIC
#AGGGGGHHHHHHH#yeah hey long time no judas#in case you guys thought i was over it#i am not fucking tagging this anything searchable no one needs to go in the judas iscariot tag and see me being insane#however much the english major roomie says im doing insane level analysis#i think im just insane actually#like. im CORRECT. but im still insane#also @ the 'what is my god' like. cruelty pondering#i would have accepted that as a face answer IF there wasnt biblical canon mixed in#since heaven and hell are mentioned this is very much not referring to the gnostic figure#nebro/yaldabaoth or saklas#the gnostic and terrible little shits ruling over earth#okay now that this is back from rhode island (the void)#@ the last attached image from a world but also ig the whole post#reminder that judas kills himself after betraying jesus (the whole point of field of blood)#and that its so incredibly interesting that presumably as hes dying judas is asking to be brought to jesus (the stars)#instead of heaven which is honestly also its own thing considering the prior acknowledgement of heaven and hell#because the stars is both jesus and the divine realm (not heaven)#i think im gonna run out of tags i need to stop#im not rereading this again OR adding insane rambling tags again i am hitting post#woe. be subjected to my post boy#okay people have Found this post so clarification this is about the lord of the lost judas album#if anyone else finds this thing i specifically did not tag
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Whom have I in heaven but you? And there is nothing on earth that I desire besides you. (26) My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. —Psalm 73:25-26
#First verse: check#Second verse: please God I need this#Been reflecting today on how it doesn’t feel like God has been there for me in any of the times I needed Him most#For any other affliction you can trust God and draw strength and comfort and encouragement from Him#But when you don’t know if He’s yours#you don’t have that foundation to go back to#How can I draw strength from God when I don’t know if His promises apply to me?#How can I find comfort in God when I might just be going to hell?#In my experience God has not been “the strength of my heart”#He has seemingly left me without strength or help#And I was literally asking God last night#“Please tell me You’re my portion.”#Anyway. I hope I can see this differently one day#Because even though I hate to doubt God#I don’t feel like He’s been fair to me#And I don’t feel like He’s treated me according to His character#And according to whom the Bible says He is#Feels as though He’s deprived me of the one thing I’m supposed to draw strength and comfort and the will to keep going from: Himself.#How horrible to know that only He can satisfy me and to FEEL that so deeply#Only to not know if I’ll ever have access to Him or if I’ll lose Him#But nevertheless:#“Lord to whom would we go?”#My journey
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HI!! for all your oli orionsound vod needs:
listen. listen okay i was getting real sick of this man not uploading vods (wants to watch them but they keep getting deleted from twitch). so ive taken it upon myself hope he doesnt mind
I have started uploading vods and will continue to hopefully!! I've also collected what i believe(?) to be every oli vod uploaded to youtube and collected them into various playlists (including an mcc playlist which has every mcc he's been in from his POV besides mccs 3-6 - for 4 and 6 i put a teammates POV but for mccs 3 and 5 there are no archived vods from anyone on his team . rip orionsound mccs 3 and 5)
if you know any vods on youtube i haven't playlisted OR have any vods downloaded that arent available elsewhere pleaseplease let me know!! trying to gather vods from this man is a living nightmare oh my god
#all /lh btw im enjoying doin this . fun sam side project#orionsound#theorionsound#oli orionsound#mcyt archive#vods channel#youre welcome to the olipops out there . doing the lords work#realised i forgot to post this and the mcyt archive website reminded me so . here ya go#also i KNOW the most recent two vods arent there yet they're UPLOADING they should hopefully be up by end of tomorrow/end of sunday#okay thats all enjoy#OH if oli tells me to take this down ofc i will . hopefully he wont though bc he sure as hell isnt doin this himself#orionsound vods
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alastor is always in drag. to me.
#hazbin hotel alastor#transmasc lesbian who passed because it was easier to pass as a man than a woman and afford him more opportunities#loved to lord over the fact that he was a better man than the majority of men were and was constantly imposing higher standards on his peer#while it matters less to pass in hell he's having a fun time expressing himself and having fun with how he presents (hence the makeup)#divorced himself from womanhood but finds that he really enjoys dressing as a drag queen from a trans perspective#also gets a huge kick out of a woman in drag treating him as a woman while he's in drag (our date night consists of me pampering him#and picking a fight with anyone who looks at him in a way I don't like. I get act like a short stack king with a cigar and everything.#vox happens upon us and I'm like no. absolutely not. take my coat dear.)
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i clicked no and a bolt of lightning immediately struck me and i was left a pile of smoking ashes with cartoon eyes blinking in disbelief with sound effect
#I KEEP GETTING THIS AD WHILE PLAYING OTOME GAMES???#jesus im sorry dude i am trying to get demon pussy right now can you come back like later#actually this is the funniest possuble ad to get while playing obey me#like i am fully trying to nurse on Prince of Hell Lord Diavolos Supple teats and then. Jesus Christ himself intervenes#obey me
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Imagining a young Arthur thinking the Normans are irredeemable doomed for hell monsters from the moment they killed King Harold, made the heir Edgar and his sisters flee, wrecked Arthur's language and broke his legal systems, made 10% of his country a wasteland, killed over 100,000 of his people by starving them to death and leaving them freeze... All that horror from William I and II...
But then Henry I becomes King. He was born in Selby, not Normandy. He was a fourth son (like Arthur), set to inherit nothing and isn't trusted by any of his older brothers. He just maybe happens to be there with one of the said brothers is killed in a hunting accident (oh no....) and becomes King. He marries Edith, the daughter of Arthur's last Anglo-Saxon princess, ensuring that Alfred the Great's bloodline lives on. He uses the Anglo-Saxon justice and taxation system because it's still better than anything Norman. He puts Englishmen back in positions of government and the Church. Henry and Edith called their daughter Matilda aethelic when in private and gave their son William an Anglo-Saxon title of aethling... Those imported Norman aristocrats mocked them for it calling them 'Godric and Godifu' - that foolish King and Queen pretending to be lesser than. Playing at being English and not Norman.
But it works. Arthur and England are at peace for the first time in... a long, long long time. Yes northern France is a nightmare but what does Arthur care for that. These guys are stamping out slavery and serfdom... That's pretty stupendous. Plus, his way of life is winning out long term, not the Norman. At least, that's what he tells himself.
And having the thought that maybe his people and culture won't be as wiped out by this King playing politics in order to carve out his own space distinct from his brothers... little Arthur sees a little bit too much of himself in this guy. Only for Henry's only son to drown on a crossing from France back to England (trying to save his sister oh my God) and then it just sets the stage for the Anarchy upon Henry's death because god forbid Matilda is Queen like...
Point is I can see Arthur just going full on fuck it once Henry II becomes King (like what was the point of it all if Matilda's son was going to be King anyway). I like to think of it as the turning point from where he's a somewhat put upon forgotten about rainy droopy island that Vikings keep plundering to a nightmare himself. That desperation to prove himself, to be worth something, to take all that grief and pain and make it someone else's problem. It takes him 100 years after the invasion, but that's the point when the Arthur who used to hide in the woods from Denmark and Scotland disappears, and instead you get the Arthur who's... a bit of a giant hypocrite. And looks the other way.
The forcing a language on a population, the replacing the ruling class with loyal people, the leaving just enough of the old systems of government in place for purely pragmatic purposes, the use of scorched earth tactics if need be. Sometimes it feels like nothing changes.
What happened to him was wrong and yet what does England do to others for so long? I like the idea of an Arthur who learnt the wrong lessons from that invasion and thinks he was weak when it happened. Because to think otherwise would be to realise he'd done nothing wrong, and to realise that he was a victim.
And that's something Arthur just cannot be.
#oooooooooooooooh i wish i could be succinct#hetalia#hws england#headcanon#historical hetalia#op#there's this great book about the Norman conquest which talks about how the invasion was seen as so awful that the English people#did what most people back then did#they thought - we must have offended God so much he's sent us to this hell as penance. hell being the normans that is#the famous quote of “Christ and his saints were asleep” regarding the Anarchy...#how far had the people fallen that the Pope himself once called Angels (not Angles... get it. get it. oh the pun. Oh lord)
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Going through all the ascended Astarion stories, where Tav either breaks up with him and reconnects years later, bringing the messiest “divorced couple” vibe along, or becomes his spawn and ends up being completely miserable and at the complete mercy of the vampire lord, I got a vision.
(Short outline: spawn!Tav goes to Avernus to avoid being trapped in a relationship, badassery, horrors, and deep existential issues ensue. Full description of the cringe can be found below)
- Tav agrees to be turned into Spawn by Astarion, ignoring the red flags because they really wanted to believe him and didn’t want to leave him alone. However, after they do, they get slapped with way too many red flags in the face (the “as long as you remember who you belong to” phrase during the second encounter with Araj, the command to shut up after mentioning Cazador’s name, the deceptive reasoning behind why he isn’t making them a full vampire), Tav grows very aware of eternity that awaits them after they defeat the Netherbrain. And it terrifies them. They understand that they don't want to find out what being his consort means. They are no longer sure about anything.
- When Karlach starts burning, Tav talks her out of it and jumps on the opportunity to go to Avernus with her (and Wyll), before Astarion gets to react and use compulsion on them. They aren't sure it would work, but it does. Small mercies.
- Between fighting off Zariel’s hordes and getting used to their new condition, Tav goes through heartbreak, oscillating between being angry with Astarion to missing him to feeling sorry for themselves. It's a cycle of angst and mental gymnastics, interrupted by battles and stirring trouble in the Hells.
- Ultimately, Tav reflects on the choices and actions that led them to this path. And when they find a way to fix Karlach’s heart, making it possible for her to go to Faerun for good, Tav chooses to stay in the Hells. Not even because they aren’t eager to confront Astarion and get controlled by him, but because they feel they belong there. Cazador might have planned the ritual, and Astarion might have completed it, but it was them who helped him do it -- they can be angry at Astarion all they want, they can tell themselves it's no longer him. They can spend years guessing whether he really wanted it, whether he is happy or not right now. Maybe they did fail him. It all doesn’t matter. They are as guilty for condemning these souls to suffering in the Hells. So, the question is: what will they do about that?
- Basically, a story that doesn’t necessarily have anything to do with Astarion, and is mostly focused on a vampire spawn Tav, who navigates hellish landscapes, occasionally helping whatever poor souls they can, learning sad stories of victims who got lured into horrible deals, musing on existential questions and wondering how should they take their life when their luck runs out on them, and they get captured by Archdevils.
- While they avoid signing any contracts or any deals and focus on honing their skills and new vampiric abilities, they do seek ways to modify their body, so they could increase their chances for survival (yes, I freaking love Vampire Hunter D: Bloodlust, how can you tell?).
- For an extra Divine Comedy (and angsty) flavor, Tav talks to an imaginary Astarion (the one they remember so fondly before his Ascension) -- the habit that started from a random “what the Astarion I knew would have said about this?” thought and kinda became a way to stay sane in this place.
#i wish i could write it myself#it can have a happy-ish ending or be a complete existential tragedy with tav finding their peace#but a badass spawn tav who held on to their autonomy and became even stronger is sexy af to be honest#change my mind#don't know how their reunion with the ascended astarion will go and whether there will be a reunion#but i do love imagining the vampire lord astarion throwing a temper tantrum#as in “you could have had all you wanted. all the riches. all the luxury. every depravity. and you chose THIS?”#and scarred seasoned hells-tempered tav just flexes at him brushes his attempts to control them off and responds “yes”#is there a happy resolution to their messy relationship?#does tav see that while their lover is actually lonely and still needs to put others down to feel better about himself...#...while they are actually doing doing better despite literally going through the Hells and being cursed?#i don't know it too#i know that avernus is horrible and it's not possible to survive there without becoming some devil's property#but i'm overwhelmed by the rule of cool and caffeine okay
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I finally watched Dr Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog and I have to make it everyone’s problem
#doin the lord’s work : three sketches and one (☝️) doodle of a pathetic man#i had to get it out of my system#doctor horrible's sing along blog#it’s so fucking good I can’t stop listening to these damn songs#doctor horrible#i love him he’s a sad kitty cat and he doomed himself into a hell of his own making#also yay art block is gone and i can finally draw faces again
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Hey mercury do you remember the time dedede was swole-
mf they had a deal not to mention about it
#funny lil thinggggggggggg.....mercury when king dedede was. buffed as hell mercury had to leave. he was too flustered and left-#-kirby by himself. like good lord big. beefy. penguin....
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god help me i'm going insane about dickson xenoblade again
#this is what i get for thinking about lord of the rings too hard this week (specifically denethor / gríma / saruman and the like)#thinking about the way anthony may delivered “when will you learn you HAVE no future?”#he thinks shulk is fully DEAD at that point. he thinks HE killed him. which he very much meant to. but now that the kid is no longer there#now that the terrible future he's been preparing for and actively working to bring about has in fact come about#i don't know that dickson really cared anymore. he played his part he did the deed expected and he did it unquestioningly. So What Now?#well. now nothing. now the world that he spent so long biding his time in; so long getting enmeshed in (even for nefarious purposes)#is about to end; is about to be gone forever.#sure zanza will probably just create another world and maybe he (dickson) will have Even More Power in the new one#(though that's not a given! he doesn't know for SURE his lord and god will keep his promise!)#but like. what the hell does he care at this point#dickson SAYS he wants power but i suspect that long long ago what the giant dickson really wanted was SURVIVAL.#we never get to know just how he became a disciple or what the giant civilization looked like in its heyday or how it ended#but in MY headcanon dickson saw that some kind of destruction coming and he wanted Out#and maybe he hated his peers and figured any power and prestige that came from this bargain was just a bonus#i think he thought of himself as a saruman type: powerful; remote; far above the petty troubles of mortals (even the long-lived high entia)#but i have always headcanoned that by his later days (i.e. when he started engaging w/colony 9; machina village; etc. in earnest)#he committed too hard to the bit and started “going native” as it were; started to give a shit in ways that he would never dare admit#maybe not as much of a shit as; you know; a regular guy would. but more than an immortal disciple and horseman of the apocalypse should.#and all the time knowing that all the world he'd seen would soon be gone#maybe everyone else can get fucked. but shulk had to die too. and that's what their god MADE them to do.#he can't allow himself to care or to hope for another option bc in his mind it's already over; decided; that's it#what else can you do in the face of ultimate power but bow to it and take whatever scraps may fall to an obedient servant?#“you have no future” nor does he except that shulk came back. except that the peoples of bionis/mechonis just wouldn't accept Fate.#and in some final rebellious corner of his mind he starts putting eggs in shulk's basket. “if they can't even defeat telethia they won't#stand a chance against me (or zanza)” so let's see if they CAN. oh they did? how about a dragon? oh fuck they defeated the dragon too?#well fuck. maybe there WAS another option all along. but will/can they stand against me; the final disciple? oh they can??#guess i'll die then bc i'm not looking THAT in the face. i am NOT unpacking my cowardice/failure/lack of vision after all these years.#good luck with that tho <3 you're welcome for the training btw. where i'm going i don't have to see your trauma assuming you live that long.#dickson#xenoblade
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