#look i know we had a thread but !! archie & fred

[crazymisscarly]

OBVIOUSLY I’m gonna ask about: Bughead sexcapades !!!

Oh God, my inner puritan is *blushing* right now. I started writing this like... over a year ago and I don’t know if I’ll ever finish it. I low key got tired of re-reading all the season 2 era bughead smut fanfics on ao3 (because believe me, i’ve read them all) and decided to give it a go myself. I’m not very explicitly smutty when I write, I prefer to allude to things or just graze the surface. not to say that I don’t like including sex scenes in my works - I just tend to steer clear of anything graphic.

Since I don’t know if I’ll actually finish it, I’ll post it here in its current entirety. For context, it’s meant to go through all of bughead’s ‘sexcapades’ throughout the early series, all the unseen intimate moments between them from their kitchen makeout scene in 1x13 up until they actually do the deed in 2x12, and possibly even exploring how their relationship changed and strengthened afterwards -- I 100% would name it something else if it ever went up on ao3, but for now, bughead sexcapades is the working title hahahahaa

Who knows, maybe going through my old WIPs thanks to this game might’ve just inspired me to keep writing it aahahaha

Betty had been honest with her mother; the night of Riverdale’s 75th Jubilee, her and Jughead almost had sex when they went back to FP’s trailer. 

They didn’t talk about it beforehand, and really, both had been too distracted by the Black Hood shooting Fred Andrews to properly discuss it with each other afterwards. But somewhere between Betty removing her pink coat and Jughead lifting her up and near-slamming her against the kitchen cabinets, both of them were completely aware of what was about to happen.

But then Jughead changed schools, and there was less time to spend with each other, and the nerves set in. They started making out once or twice, and both of them could feel the urge to connect with each other in the most intimate of ways… but had always been interrupted. 

Their first post-“shirtless in the trailer kitchen” make out was in the Red and Black office; Jughead deepened their kiss and pulled Betty towards his body as he leaned back against a desk - it reminded him of the Blue and Gold, their haven of intelligence gathering (and their place to escape for a few moments alone during school hours). Their near-hookup in FP’s trailer had ignited some kind of flame in both of them; they weren’t as cautious with touching, the familiar comfortability giving both of them the confidence to explore each other’s bodies in their own nervous way - Jughead’s hands strayed from Betty’s cheeks to her neck, then to her waist, and he hoped that maybe he’d get to move his hands even lower...

But still, they’d been interrupted - then, and any other subsequent time, whether by friends or Betty’s mother calling her to come home. So much so that sex seemed like it was going to become an impossible mission that not even Tom Cruise could achieve.

When they had finally found the time to be alone, shortly after Jughead drag raced the Ghoulies and Betty admitted that she didn’t really want to break up with Jughead (in fact, that was not what she’d asked Archie to do), they’d both overthought the possibility of sex so much that neither was certain whether they were actually ready for it, or if their intensifying emotions were the result of the life-threatening happenings in their hometown. 

“We’ll know when it feels like the right time, Betts.” Jughead reassured her after she wiggled out from under him on the trailer’s bed; Jughead had claimed it after FP was imprisoned, but Betty was struggling to think of it as being anything other than Jughead’s parents bed. And something about having sex in it felt... off.

Betty sighed. “I want you, Juggie, I don’t know what’s wrong with me…” 

Less than two weeks earlier she’d practically torn her and Jughead’s shirts off in an effort to get closer to him. But today, lying on her back beneath her boyfriend, on a bed, her thighs cradling is hips as they kissed (hot, open mouthed kisses) as though her body was in control and her brain was just following its lead, sex just seemed so much more real - and the butterflies in her stomach threatened to swallow her up. Betty knew having sex would change something between them that couldn’t be reversed, and she’d only just gotten him back. She didn’t want to risk losing him by doing too much too fast. 

“Nothing! Nothing’s wrong with you.” Jughead said quickly; his eyes betrayed the mild panic he felt. “We both have to be feeling completely comfortable and ready or it’s not going to work out - and I read that on Reddit, so we can reasonably believe it’s true.” He smirked as his eyes met hers. 

Betty giggled. “Did you find a thread called ‘how to have sex’ and use the replies as research?” She brushed a stray lock of hair from Jughead’s forehead. 

Jughead’s cheeks were turning pink. He cleared his throat before speaking. “Well, that’s, ah - that wasn’t the exact title…” 

Betty smiled and reached out to take his hand. “Hey, comfortable, right?” She leaned over and kissed him. Although she still wasn’t completely sure about sex itself, kissing Jughead and feeling his arms wrap around her was a great experience in itself. 

Jughead leaned into her, his body coming dangerously close to pinning her down into the mattress. He groaned quietly as Betty kissed his neck, and Betty felt the sound all the way down her navel, and lower…

He felt Betty lightly pushing his chest, and he rolled onto his back so she could straddle him. His body felt like it was on fire. The feel of her, pressed against him, had him filled with desires he didn’t know could exist. Everywhere Jughead touched her felt hot, and her mouth on his was like a fulfilling heat that awakened every nerve inside him. He trailed his hands down to her hips and pulled her up his body slightly so she was straddling his lower abdomen instead of his lap, fearing that if he left her there then this would be over before it even really started.

Betty pulled away from his mouth, her eyes a mixture of lust and vulnerability that had Jughead’s breath coming out in laboured gasps. “Juggie?” she asked in a breathy moan. 

Oh God and yes were the only words in Jughead’s mind. “Ye-yeah?” He forced out when he could focus. 

“It’s getting kind of late…” She bit her bottom lip for a moment. Jughead’s grip on her hips tightened at the sight. “I could tell my Mom I’m staying over at Veronica’s… that’s if, you know… you don’t want me to go.” Her eyes searched Jughead’s. 

Jughead’s mind was swimming, and he would have been embarrassed that it took him so long to figure out what she meant if he could even think at all. “Um, yes, that's a great idea.” She probably could have asked him to paint himself blue and go to school dressed as a Smurf and he would have agreed, so long as she stayed right where she was. 

Betty smiled and laughed softly. The vibrations sent tingly jolts through Jughead’s body and he couldn’t contain the groan that escaped his mouth. Betty’s eyes lit up for a moment before she blushed and looked down at his chest. She ran her fingers up his chest softly, and Jughead placed his hands on her cheeks to pull her down for another kiss.

This kiss felt deeper than the others. Betty’s tongue slipped into his mouth. One of Jughead’s hands slid into Betty’s hair as the other wrapped around her back. Her chest pressed deliciously up against his. She was so warm, right now and every day. And she freely gave him her warmth, no strings attached. Betty’s love warmed his heart, his body, his mind - he gravitated towards it every day, and gave it back to her in the form of light brushes of fingers, a hand in her hand, a gentle nudging of her shoulder...  

And her smiles… wow.

Jughead’s heart was beating faster than he’d ever felt it beat as Betty started kissing and sucking on his neck. He’d never been so closely entangled with Betty before, and all he wanted was to get even closer. As close as two people could get… 

But he wasn’t going to push the point, not when they both had reasons to hesitate. 

“Can I…” Betty said nervously. “Do you want me to…” her hand slid down his chest, over his hip (his breath hitched as her fingers met the skin where his shirt had ridden up) and rested on his thigh. She squeezed his thigh just a little, and Jughead couldn’t believe how sensitive it was; how good it felt. 

[riverdale-retread]

Riverdale S 3 E 4 (The Spoilers Are Here)

- This is the WayBack Machine Episode, where we get to see what the parents were like in their high school days.  I’m still impressed by how well structured (what, Riverdale? Structure? Hear me out) this season is. The efficient storytelling continues!   After setting up the game as a major plot thread, they get to Ep 4 and show you how you actually play the game, and why it might be fun. Doing things with people, where you get to be goofy and theatrical, you know, PLAYING, is underrated.  I especially loved Fred in his white knight robe, fluttering past on his skateboard. 

-  Riverdale skewers ‘affirmations’ and the language of ‘healing’ and also ‘detox’ and the whole language of self helpiness altogether. It’s been ramping up in intensity since Polly (who I barely mention because she’s boring) and having Alice try to write affirmations given all that happened in S2 made me sneer at the thought altogether, which I don’t know how to feel about actually. Betty also does ‘journaling’ to try to cope and that doesn’t do shit either.

- Which Vixen was FP screwing, that distracted him so much from the uber hot Alice Smith?   When I first watched the FP-Alice up-against-the-wall bit, I must’ve had my wires crossed because I digested the scene as a Bughead one, but now I realize I’ve seen two FP-Alice love scenes and I feel weird about that.  

- Is Riverdale referencing Wuthering Heights?  FP-Alice look exactly like their kids (the ones they didn’t make together, eeee squick), and in the next generation those kids get together but in a better (well, up to a point) way.  Alice-Fred also have a moment, exactly the same as Betty and Archie have several moments.  Alice never tells FP a bunch of things, and Betty has a lot of lying by omission and delay.  All the unresolved issues of the previous generation being directly repeated by the younger generation, who moreover look exactly the same as that previous generation, very Wuthering Heights. 

- Dr. Curdle Jr. goes into the archives for Betty. 

- Is Penelope attracted to Sierra? Like her daughter Cheryl will later be to Josie?? Is that why she engineers the weird pairings (FP with Hermione instead of Alice, and so on?) Is Penelope gay too?? Because this seems like an epater-les-straights kind of move, to smoosh straights together and see what they do. And she gets to have alonetime with Sierra.    I love Baby Penelope (maybe because she has Cheryl’s face, and I love Cheryl).   Penelope’s 80s dancing rocking out to the Fred Heads was the best bit of this episode for me, and the delicate fragile girl Penelope who cries easily growing up to be the hard edged woman is very, very sad.

- Is the closet that Featherhead’s corpse is stored in by the Gargoyle King 1.0 the same one that Jughead lived in for a while when homeless in S1? Is there any place that Jughead lives that isn’t the site of a murder or other trauma???  I mean, that closet was abandoned (’forgotten’ to use Jughead’s words) because at least the series of janitors must’ve known that a corpse rotted in there for three weeks.

- Are Fred’s ideas always terrible? His idea to ‘talk’ leads directly to a disaster.  Everyone agreed apparently from day 1 that Fred was Radiant and a Knight, and this afterglow is what makes people think Archie is the same, except of course he is not.

- Betty does not grock the fact that FP+Alice having a kid means she and Jughead share a sibling. 

- Veronica expressing absolutely zero interest in the G&G game while Jughead gets absolutely obsessed with it gets very interesting in the Archie Prison Breakout episode. Veronica corrals a bunch of people to help her with the highly dangerous prison-breakout mission while Jughead narrates it (and does magick? on? it?) is an interesting parallel track.  Veronica and Jughead are so similar, but Veronica is slightly better than Jughead at everything.  They both do all of these - dropping references, speaking in complex pretentious sentences that threaten to veer off into nonsense any minute, BEING A LEADER, a barely suppressed tendency to explode into emotional or physical violence, excessive commitment to not-great romantic partners and friendships, always taking on more than they can actually handle - but Veronica does it all with a *touch* more panache, slightly bigger scale.

- The spit-on-hands-and-then-touch-those-hands in order to make a pact made me almost throw up in this Second Year of Covid.  

[oceteva]

The Forbidden Fruit | Riverdale ~ Burgers & Onion Rings

[Slow burn!Hiram Lodge x OC] Word count; 7,147

Info | Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3

Lauren parked her black BMW in the parking lot right underneath her and Jughead's usual booth in the far corner once she arrived at Pop's diner after she had left her father's office. The Lanzetta teenager took out the keys from the ignition and stored them inside of her black leather purse before she exited out of her vehicle. Lauren then glanced around the empty parking lot for only a few seconds before she spotted her fellow detective partners.

The Lanzetta teenager gave the couple a small wave along with a small smile before she strutted across the parking lot in her heeled boots and met her best friends at the door of Pop's diner. "Hey, guys," Lauren greeted the beanie-wearing teenager and the blonde before she inquired with her brows slightly furrowed in worry, "how's Fred and Archie doing?" 

The Cooper girl anxiously crossed her arms over her bubblegum pink sweater before she answered Lauren's question, "Fred's still in surgery. They're trying to repair the hole in his stomach." Betty took a deep breath as she was riddled with worry before she continued as she explained how their friend was doing, "and Veronica took Archie home to, hopefully, get him to relax for a little bit."

Lauren slowly nodded her head as she bit down on her painted red lip before she mumbled, "that's good." The Lanzetta girl could only imagine how Archie was doing right now. She was glad that Veronica was taking care of him, though. Lauren would have liked to be there for Archie but she was happy that someone was looking after him. Lauren just prayed that the doctors would do everything in their power in keeping Fred Andrews alive.

The parking lot right outside of Pop's diner grew silent for a few tense moments as each of the three teenagers thought about the Andrews duo before Jughead finally cleared his throat and spoke up. "Well, let's get in there," the Jones teenager mumbled before he pulled open the front door of the diner and allowed Betty and Lauren to enter first before he followed quickly after.

The three teenagers glanced around the empty Pop's diner for only a moment or so before their presence was felt by the owner of the establishment. "Sorry, kids," Pop Tate apologized to his loyal customers before he murmured with a mop clutched tightly in his left hand, "we're closed today. There was, uh -"

However, before Pop could explain what happened at the diner, the Cooper girl quickly interrupted as she stated, "Pop, we heard about what happened." Betty pointed her thumb back towards the front door of the diner as she told the older man the reason for why they were here, "we just got back from the hospital to look for Mr. Andrews' wallet. It's missing."

The older man quickly moved closer to the three teenagers at the mention of the Andrews man with worry shining throughout his brown irises. "Is he -" Pop Tate anxiously began to question but he couldn't even get the words fully out of his mouth.

However, the three teenagers all knew what Pop was asking, so Lauren quickly assured the older man with a soft smile, "he's in surgery but it's looking good." The Lanzetta girl knew that they didn't know that for certain, that Fred would be okay, but she knew during times like these, everyone just wants to know everything was going to be okay. 

Pop took a deep breath of relief that he seemingly been holding in since late last night before he softly whispered, "all right." The older man moved around his diner while he told the three teenagers as he pointed to where Fred and Archie had been seated at during the attack, "the police have already looked. But if you wanna double-check, he was in that booth, there."

Lauren gave the older man a thankful smile before she, Betty, and Jughead carefully stepped over the large pile of dark red blood. While the two teenage girls moved to the Andrews' booth, Jughead focused his attention back onto Pop. "So, uh, what happened, Pop?" The Jones teenager questioned, "from your point of view?"

Pop released a heavy sigh as he mumbled, "ah, I wish I knew." The older man briefly closed his eyes as he felt ashamed of what happened here last night before he told the three teenagers from his memory, "as soon as that gun turned off me, I... God help me, I dove." Pop busied himself by trying to clean up all of the blood before he continued, "I don't even remember calling the police, but I guess I did."

Lauren, who had been examining the booth that the Andrews duo had been sitting in last with Betty, moved towards Jughead and the older man when she couldn't find Fred's wallet nor any calling card from the shooter. "Hey, Pop," the Lanzetta girl called out before she curiously inquired, "have you had the chance to see how much money was stolen from the register?"

Pop Tate furrowed his brows as he stared at the brunette girl before he finally shook his head. "Not a penny," the older man mumbled after his mind recalled the memories of what happened last night.

While Betty quickly moved towards Pop along with her boyfriend and best friend in shock, Jughead and Lauren immediately looked at each other with a knowing look. "See, I knew it," the Jones teenager exclaimed as he snapped his thumb and middle finger together. "What kind of thief shoots up a joint and then doesn't take a single dollar bill?" Jughead questioned as he shook his head.

"He wasn't a thief," Lauren answered the beanie-wearing teenager's question with what she had thought all along. It was what both she and Jughead had thought since it didn't really add up when Archie had told the police about what happened - that it could have been a setup. It just didn't make sense for it to be a robbery. 

"Over the years, this place has been robbed many times," Pop Tate told the three teenagers, "bricks through the windows, even, during the riots." The older man shook his head as he stated, "I've looked plenty of thugs in the eye, but this man, his goal was something else. Darker." Pop looked each of the teenagers in the eye as he muttered ominously, "it was like the Angel of Death had come to Riverdale."

"Jeez, Pop," the Jones teenager mumbled with a slight smile on his face before he told the older man, "lighten up." Jughead released a small but equally awkward chuckle before he commented, "you sound like the cranky old guy in the Friday the 13th movies."

Lauren immediately slapped her beanie-wearing best friend's denim jacket as she exclaimed, "hey!" The Lanzetta teenager amusingly shook her head at Jughead before she jokingly scolded him, "don't go hating on the classics."

"What?" The Jones teenager wondered with a small chuckle. Jughead shrugged his denim clad shoulders before he told his best friend in a serious voice, "hey, I'm all for the Friday the 13th movies but this isn't a movie, Lala."

"Guys," the Cooper teenager mumbled as she interrupted the conversation between her boyfriend and best friend. Betty let out a low sigh before she told them as she shook her head, "the wallet's not here."

The three teenagers all immediately released disappointed sighs at the fact that they couldn't find Fred's wallet like they had planned. It wasn't even just the fact that they couldn't find the collection of money, photos, and cards. It was the disappointment that they couldn't do this one thing for Archie, who was barely hanging on by a thread. Lauren, Betty, and Jughead were always about helping their friends in a difficult time, so it sucked that they couldn't do more for Archie and Fred Andrews.

The investigating trio knew there was no point in staying at the diner any longer since their quest in finding Fred's wallet was unsuccessful. However, before any of the teenagers could say goodbye to Pop, the Lanzetta girl was interrupted when her cell phone began to ring inside of her burgundy coat. Lauren gave everyone in the room an apologetic smile before she pulled out her device. 

VEE 👠👗💕 CAN YOU BRING BURGERS BACK FROM THE DINER? I CAN'T EAT ANOTHER MEAL FROM THE HOSPITAL CAFETERIA 🤢🙏🏼

The Lanzetta girl couldn't help but to chuckle quietly to herself as she read her best friend's text message, while she ignored the puzzled looks for Jughead and Betty, since she knew Veronica had only eaten ONE meal from Riverdale General's cafeteria. However, Lauren could understand, though, since hospital food usually sucks, so the brunette girl shot Veronica a text back with the promise of food before she placed her cell phone back into her coat. 

"Hey, Pop," the Lanzetta teenager called out to the older man before she curiously wondered, "is the kitchen open?" Lauren wasn't totally sure that it would be since the diner was not open with Pop just cleaning up the mess from the shooting of Fred Andrews. 

Pop Tate looked up from the blood that had covered every inch of the wooden mop and over to the brunette teenager before he slowly shook his head. "It's not," the older man stated, much to Lauren's dismay, before the caring man questioned, "does it need to be?"

"Well, its just everyone's hungry at the hospital. You know, all the people that are there supporting Archie and his dad," the Lanzetta teenager explained to the owner of the diner with a sickeningly sweet smile plastered across her face as she hoped that Pop would be willing to open up his kitchen after she had already promised Veronica. The brunette girl knew there was always the other diner in Riverdale, Shelly's Shack, but nothing beats Pop's burgers. 

The older man hummed to himself as he stared at Lauren and took in her words before he finally nodded his head. "I'll do anything for the Andrews family after what happened last night," Pop stated as he still felt so bad for not helping Fred before he got shot. Pop knew it wasn't his fault but he still felt guilty for not doing more to prevent it. "Give me about fifteen minutes and I'll have some burgers ready to go," Pop Tate told the Lanzetta girl as he went to turn around to start up the kitchen.

However, though, before the older man could get too far, Lauren quickly added with a sheepish smile, "uh, actually, Pop, it's more than just the usual group. You'll be feeding a group of River Vixens and Bulldogs, as well." The Lanzetta teenager knew Pop would need a whole crew to knock out all those orders, so the brunette offered a helping hand as she told Pop, "and if you wouldn't mind, I'd love to help."

"Yeah," the Cooper girl quickly spoke up with her sweet and innocent smile adoring her face. Betty bumped her shoulder into her boyfriend's jean-clad one before she told Pop Tate, "we would love to help, too."

The owner of the diner immediately grinned at the three teenagers with a grateful expression displayed across his face before he murmured, "that would be great, kids." Pop Tate waved his hand after he placed the bloody mop against a booth before he stated as he lead the trio into the back of the diner, "well, come on."

Once Pop Tate and the trio of detective teenagers were inside of the kitchen of the diner, the older man immediately walked up to the flattop and turned up the heat. Pop then busied himself for a few minutes as he got out the right ingredients for the burgers like the beef, cheese, lettuce, tomatoes, and Pop's Secret Sauce. The older man placed everything on the assembly line before he looked back at the three teenagers.

"Alright," Pop began as he stared solely at Betty and Lauren before he instructed, "you girls can get started on the burgers." The older man glanced over to the beef as he explained, "they are already formed, so all you gotta do now is throw them on the flattop for a few minutes." Pop then pointed over to the things that goes on the burger before he continued, "once they are finished, you can load them up." The older man looked around him for a moment before he mumbled as he glanced around his kitchen, "and the wrapping paper should be lying around here somewhere." 

"I know where it's at, Pop," the Lanzetta teenager quickly assured the older man with a small smile shining across her painted red lips. Lauren was quite familiar with everything in the diner since she had paid her dues last year when she used to work at the diner before she found out about the Lanzetta family business and got involved. 

Pop Tate stared across at the brunette girl for a moment as he made sure that Betty and Lauren could handle the burgers before he murmured, "very well." The older man then turned his gaze onto the beanie-wearing teenager once he knew the burgers were in good hands before he told Jughead as he slowly began to walk away from the flattop, "let's go get you set up on the onion rings."

Once Pop and Jughead walked over to the fryer, the Lanzetta and the Cooper girls got ready as they fixed their hairs into ponytails at the base of their necks and placed clear gloves over their painted fingers before they got started on cooking the hamburgers with Betty handing Lauren the patties and the experienced cook placing the patties onto the sizzling flattop. This process continued for awhile in a comfortable silence as they cooked about thirty patties to feed their army of River Vixens and Bulldogs. 

The calm silence between the two best friends soon came to an end, though, after Lauren had made sure that the burgers were cooked perfectly and she had them laid out of the assembly line to be put together just like Pop does them. "Hey, I forgot to ask," Betty began as she placed the first hamburger bun onto the red and white wrapping paper before she glanced over to Lauren and inquired, "did your dad end up finding anything useful about what happened with Archie's dad?"

The Lanzetta teenager released a small sigh as she shook her head. "Nope," Lauren mumbled in disappointment before she told Betty about what she had found out from her father, "daddy barely even heard about what happened but he did say he was going to meet up with the Serpents later today to see what they know." The brunette girl shot her best friend a small smile before she lightly lied, "daddy also said he was going to talk to a few guys who know the gossip on the streets, so hopefully he'll find something that can help us."

Lauren couldn't exactly tell the Cooper girl that her father was putting a few men from the Lanzetta mob out onto the streets to go digging for information. The only person that actually knew about what her family really did was Jughead. However, he only knew because her father did a lot of business on the Southside like one of the strip clubs along with a medical clinic and also working very closely with the Serpents. 

The Cooper girl released her own sigh at Lauren's answer as that was not what she was hoping for. Betty had thought that the Lanzetta man would have found something but she was relieved that it was being looked into. "I hope so, too," the blonde teenager told Lauren as she shot the brunette girl a sad smile as she prayed that they could find something to help Fred Andrews. 

The blonde and brunette best friends shared similar looks of wanting to figure out this guy-in-the-hood problem before they focused back onto their tasks since they would have to wait until they could investigate more. However, Lauren and Betty did spend the next fifteen minutes talking about their theories of who could have hurt the Andrews man as they wrapped the hamburgers. They continued to do this for another ten minutes before Lauren cheered after she wrapped the last burger, "there! We're all done!"

Betty shook her head as she stared down at thirty or so wrapped hamburgers with a look of disbelief. "I don't know how you used to do this," the Cooper girl commented as she rang her hands through the air as she tried to get rid of the soreness that she felt from placing the vegetables in the burgers and wrapping them up. 

Lauren released a small chuckle before she shot the blonde girl a wide grin. "It was easy," the Lanzetta teenager commented with a small shrug of her burgundy coat as she remembered her days as a cook for the diner before Lauren added, "but then again, I never was feeding an army like we are doing now."

The Cooper girl let out a small giggle as she uttered, "fair point." The two teenagers shared a moment of laughter together before Betty called out through the kitchen, "hey, Juggy!" The blonde girl then turned around when she didn't get a response as she was curious to know if Jughead had finished making the onion rings but quickly gasped when she saw Jughead was right in front of her. "Oh!" Betty exclaimed before she placed her hands onto Jughead's chest and mumbled with a blush to her pale cheeks, "you scared me."

The Jones teenager released a small chuckle before he joked, "I gotta keep you on your toes." Jughead placed a quick kiss onto his girlfriend's plump lips since he wasn't really one for public affection before he tossed his arm over Betty's shoulders and looked over to his best friend. "All finished here?" Jughead wondered as he glanced towards all of the burgers. 

"Yep," the Lanzetta teenager responded as she nodded her head. Lauren leaned back against the counter before she pointed her blue irises towards the direction that Jughead had came from as she questioned, "what about you?"

Jughead nodded his head as well before he explained, "Pop's loading them into some boxes."

Lauren's body straightened up at her best friend's answer before she commented, "we should do that, too." The Lanzetta teenager walked around the large kitchen and towards the back room where she knew all the supplies were located before she grabbed three big boxes. Lauren then silently handed them out before she, Betty, and Jughead started to load the burgers into the boxes to take to the hospital.

The three teenagers continued to load up the food for a few silent minutes before Pop Tate made his presence known with his heavy footsteps. Pop placed the white box of onion rings down onto the counter next to the boxes of burgers before he told the trio with an aged smile shining across his face, "you're all set, kids."

Lauren shot the older man a wide grin before she showed her praise for letting them use his kitchen, "thank you, Pop, for doing this." The Lanzetta teenager then moved and grabbed her black leather purse from the counter beside her before she asked as she dug around for her wallet, "how much will this all cost?"

Pop Tate immediately shook his head as he waved his hands through the air. "That won't be necessary," the older man quickly told the brunette girl before he stated as it was the least he could do for the Andrews family, "it's on the house."

Lauren pouted at the older man as she didn't want anything free - especially from Pop when he had helped her so many times when she was growing up and because he is such an important person for Riverdale. "Alright," the Lanzetta teenager agreed before she mumbled, "but only this time." 

Pop Tate grinned at the brunette girl before he looked at the three teenagers. "Enjoy the burgers, kids," the older man mumbled before he told them, "be careful."

"We will," the Cooper girl uttered with a bright smile shining across her face. "Have a nice day, Pop," Betty told the older man before she, Lauren, and Jughead each grabbed a box of food with Jughead also grabbing the one that held the onion rings.

The three teenagers took their exit out of the kitchen before they walked back into the main part of the diner. While Betty and Jughead made their way to the front door, Lauren made a quick stop at the counter. Lauren placed the box of burgers onto the counter before she quickly placed three one hundred dollar bills inside of the tip jar. "Thank you, Pop," the brunette girl whispered with a wide grin on her face before she quickly grabbed her box and headed out the front door.

Lauren, Betty, and Jughead walked towards the Lanzetta girl's black BMW since the Jones teenager only had his motorcycle and there was no way he could store the burgers and onion rings. However, though, before they could even get half way across the parking lot, they were soon interrupted when a familiar voice called out Lauren's name from beside the diner. 

The Lanzetta teenager glanced over her burgundy clad shoulder before a wide grin immediately pulled onto her face when she had been right when she saw a certain Serpent. Lauren focused back onto Betty and Jughead as she told them, "give me a minute." She then placed her box of burgers on top of Betty's and pulled out her car keys before she handed them over to Jughead so they didn't have to wait on her. 

Lauren waited until the couple of Jughead and Betty continued to walk towards her car before she swiftly turned around and sped walk up to the Serpent, who was also walking towards her. The Lanzetta teenager didn't even get the chance to say anything once they were only inches apart as the tattooed Serpent, who happened to be her boyfriend, pulled her into a fierce and passionate kiss. 

Lauren didn't mind her boyfriend's actions, though. She actually loved it. Lauren loved the excitement, danger, and desire that surrounded their one year relationship. The Lanzetta girl finally pulled away from the passionate embrace when she felt like she couldn't breathe before she shot Daniel a happy grin from the sight of him. "What are you doing here?" Lauren curiously wondered as she wrapped her hands around Daniel's neck and played with the labels of his leather Serpent jacket. 

"What?" The Southside Serpent questioned with a smirk playing on his plump lips as he wrapped his arms protectively around Lauren's waist, "can't I check up on my girl?"

The Lanzetta teenager playfully rolled her blue irises at her boyfriend before she muttered, "oh, I'm sure that's why you're here." 

Daniel released a deep chuckle from the pit of his chest that shook both him and Lauren since she was practically pressed against his front. "So, what's up?" The Sen biker questioned once he had stopped laughing and Lauren had slapped his chest before he continued, "what's with the radio silence?"

Lauren immediately furrowed her brows as she stared up at her boyfriend. "What are you talking about?" The Lanzetta teenager wondered as she had no clue what the Serpent was going on about since she hadn't heard from him since last night. 

Daniel rolled his brown eyes before he placed his right hand into Lauren's burgundy coat pocket and silently pulled out her cell phone. The Serpent quickly took a step back when Lauren yelled out, "hey," as she tried to get her device back. Daniel released an amused chuckle at her complaining as he unlocked Lauren's phone that had a photo of them plastered on the lockscreen. The Sen biker pulled up the iMessages app before he showed Lauren her phone that held ten text messages all from him.

DANNY BOY 🥰💖 : Good morning, gorgeousss 😘

DANNY BOY 🥰💖 : Do you wanna ride to school? 🏍😉

DANNY BOY 🥰💖 : Shit. You have practice today, don't you?

DANNY BOY 🥰💖 : Shoot me a txt when ur on break so I know you actually made it to school.💖

DANNY BOY 🥰💖 : IDK why u get up so early to go to school 🙄

DANNY BOY 🥰💖 : L A U R E N  H E L L L L L L L O !!

DANNY BOY 🥰💖 : B A B Y !!

DANNY BOY 🥰💖 : I'm worried. Call me as soon as you can

DANNY BOY 🥰💖 : I'm coming to find you

DANNY BOY 🥰💖 : I love you

"Oh, fuck," the Lanzetta teenager swore as she grabbed her cell phone and, sure enough, saw the text messages that she hadn't seen from her boyfriend. "I am so sorry, babe," Lauren apologized as she tightened her hands around Daniel's leather jacket before she placed a quick kiss onto his lips. "Everything's been shit since practice," the brunette girl stated before she explained for her radio silence, "Archie's dad, Fred, was shot last night and I've been running around town trying to help out to find who did it."

The Sen biker rubbed the pad of his thumb against Lauren's right cheek as he softly murmured, "I'm sorry to hear about that, bǎobèi."

The Lanzetta teenager couldn't help but roll her blue eyes at her boyfriend. "I'm sure you are," Lauren mumbled as she knew how her red headed best friend wasn't Daniel's biggest fan. It mostly had to deal with Sweet Pea's influence and his hate for the Northsiders. 

"Hey, come on, now," Daniel began as he gripped onto the Lanzetta girl's chin and softly stared down into her blue irises with his brown ones before he stated, "I'm not completely heartless." The Sen biker lightly shrugged his leather clad shoulders as he added, "besides, I know how much Fred means to you."

A deep frown instantly pulled onto the Lanzetta teenager's face at the mention of Fred's name. Lauren still felt so heartbroken from what happened to the man, who was like her second father. It made it even worse that she couldn't do anything to help Fred at the moment. Lauren couldn't help but to feel this wave of sadness as she thought about the red headed man, so she gently placed her head onto Daniel's warm chest before she mumbled, "he means a lot to me."

The Sen biker placed a soft kiss onto the crown of Lauren's brunette hair and stayed there for a moment before he quietly asked against the Lanzetta girl's head, "you gonna be okay?"

Lauren couldn't help but to roll her blue eyes at the question before she pushed herself out of her boyfriend's chest. "Yeah, I'll be fine," the Lanzetta teenager told Daniel as if it was obvious before she added with a small smile, "I always am."

Daniel pushed a portion of the Lanzetta girl's brunette hair behind her ear before he cradled the right side of Lauren's face. "I know you are but you it doesn't mean that you have to be all the time," the Southside Serpent softly murmured as he tried to comfort his girlfriend when he knew she was struggling. 

The River Vixen's heart instantly melted at the sight of her usually angry biker boyfriend's gentle words. Lauren always loved when Daniel would go out of his hard exterior and be that big softy for her. However, Lauren was one to not show her fears and to always be strong like her father taught her to do, so the Lanzetta girl joked to hide her true emotions, "it's in my blood."

"You know," Daniel had began to comfort his girlfriend about how she didn't need to hide herself from him and how she can vent to him but before he could say anything more, Daniel was soon interrupted when the Prince of the Southside started to honk the horn in the Lanzetta teenager's black BMW. 

Lauren released an amused chuckle at her impatient friend, she was surprised Jughead lasted this long, and her very annoyed boyfriend. The brunette girl loved the relationship between her boyfriend and best friend. It was funny watching them go back and forth with one another with their hate - even though she knew they didn't actually hate each other. Lauren shot her annoyed boyfriend a small smile before she murmured, "duty calls."

The Sen Serpent puffed out a heavy sigh before he silently nodded his head in understanding as he knew Lauren had food to deliver from what he had seen with the boxes that the trio had been carrying. "Do you want me to come with?" Daniel wondered as he wanted to be there for Lauren. He knew how much stress the brunette girl always placed on her shoulders, so he wanted to at least ease it by being close by to assure her that everything would be alright.

The Lanzetta teenager shook her head with a tiny grin playing on her lips, "Nah," Lauren uttered before she explained why it wasn't best for Daniel to come with her, "I don't want to bore you to death. I'm just going to be in the waiting room while we wait for news about Fred." The brunette girl appreciated the thought, though. It meant a lot to Lauren that her boyfriend was willing to be around the Northsiders for her. 

Daniel nodded his head once more in understanding - even though he'd rather be there for his girlfriend. "Well, give me a call if need anything, alright?" The Sen biker instructed as he stared down into Lauren's blue irises before he softly murmured, "I'll drop everything for you."

Lauren shot her boyfriend a soft smile as she loved hearing his sweet words before she promised him, "I will." The Lanzetta teenager then pulled Daniel into a kiss filled with passion and love. However, though, when Lauren began to feel as Daniel slid his hands down her waist and squeezed her ass while ruining the sweet moment, the brunette girl pulled away. Lauren shook her head with a soft chuckle before she told him with a smirk plastered across her painted red lips, "I gotta go."

The tattooed Sen biker pouted down at his girlfriend like a innocent puppy before he mumbled, "fine." Daniel leaned down and placed another kiss onto Lauren's lips before he placed a soft peck onto her forehead. "I'll see you later," Daniel promised before he finally released the brunette girl from his grasp and let Lauren walk away from his embrace. 

The Lanzetta teenager blew her boyfriend a kiss as she started to walk backwards and yelled out, "love you," before she quickly jogged to her car and jumped into the driver's seat. The first thing that Lauren noticed once she entered her black BMW was the grinning Cooper girl and the extremely annoyed Jughead Jones. The brunette girl released a small chuckle before she teasingly asked as she pulled out of the parking lot, "what crawled up your ass?"

Jughead crossed his arms over his denim clad chest before he complained to his best friend with a heavy eye roll as he looked out his window and looked at the Serpent on his motorcycle, the current bane to his hungry stomach, "the burgers are getting cold all because you couldn't say no to tattoos over there."

Lauren rolled her blue eyes right back at her best friend before she exclaimed, "oh, shut up!" The Lanzetta girl glanced back to Jughead in the backseat before she asked him, "do you know how many times I've kept my mouth shut when you and B made out?" Lauren didn't wait for a response before she stated, "a lot." The brunette girl shrugged her shoulders as she continued to drive through Riverdale before she told Jughead, "besides, no one said you couldn't take a burger right now."

There was the loud giggle from Betty Cooper that immediately escaped her mouth as she watched the conversation play out between her boyfriend and her best friend. "Oh, he already did," the blonde teenager told Lauren as she glanced back to Jughead with a wide grin shinned across her pink lips. 

"What the hell, Juggy!" The Lanzetta teenager practically screeched when she learned that new piece of information from the Cooper girl. "You ass," Lauren loudly exclaimed before she mumbled under her breath, even though everyone in the black BMW could obviously hear her, "complaining for nothing."

The Jones teenager pouted from his spot in the backseat before he mumbled out an excuse so it didn't seem like he was complaining for nothing like Lauren had commented on, "well... I didn't have any onion rings yet."

The Lanzetta teenager couldn't help but immediately burst out into a heavy laughter - along with Betty - at the pouting Jughead Jones. It was something Lauren was used to but always found hilarious - something that Jughead only showed around her, Betty, and Archie. The brunette girl shook her head at her best friend before she uttered with nothing but love in her voice for the beanie-wearing teenager, "you are so annoying, Juggy."

The detective trio of the Lanzetta, Cooper, and Jones teenagers continued to joke back and forth with one another like they always do - despite what was going on - as Lauren drove through the busy town of Riverdale before the brunette girl finally pulled, thankfully, into a front row spot at Riverdale General. The three teenagers then all grabbed their boxes of burgers and onion rings before they headed straight to the waiting room.

"Who's hungry?" Jughead loudly asked the room that was filled to the brim with concerned parents, River Vixens, and Bulldogs alike before the Jones teenagers stated as he, Betty, and Lauren placed the group of white boxes down onto the glass table in front of the seating area, "we've got burgers and onions rings!"

The supposedly silent waiting area of Riverdale General was immediately overcome by loud whoops, hollers, and cheers at the mention of food and the familiar sight of the white and red wrapping paper from Pop's diner before Reggie Mantle, resident Bulldog, exclaimed over the loud sounds of excitement, "hell yeah!"

The group of teenagers practically rushed to reach the boxes of food while Veronica Lodge walked up to the Lanzetta teenager with a wide grin proudly displayed across her lips. "Thank you, thank you, thank you," the brown eyed girl chanted out her praise as if she was getting a mind blowing orgasm. 

The Lanzetta teenager let out an amused chuckle before she told Veronica with a grin of her own, "you are very welcome." Lauren playfully bumped her hip into the Lodge girl's black dress covered one before she sarcastically uttered as she teased Veronica about her text message, "I knew you were just dying for some real food."

Veronica playfully bumped her hip right back into the Lanzetta girl's burgundy coat covered one before she mumbled with a slight embarrassed blush to her tan cheeks, "shut it."

The two teenage girls couldn't help but to burst into a giggling mess as they clung onto each other to help stand upright. Lauren and Veronica had always been the closest out of their group of friends ever since Veronica arrived in Riverdale. Lauren figured it had something to do with how they were both raised - in a rich and business-like family. It also probably had to deal with the fact that they've made out on several occasions for fun before Veronica got with Archie and Lauren got with Daniel but that wasn't important anymore. 

"Come on," the Lanzetta teenager told her dark haired best friend as she linked her arm through Veronica's. "Let's go get some food before Jughead eats it all," Lauren joked as she pulled Veronica into the fray of noisy teenagers to grab their own meal of a burger and onion rings.

It took awhile before Lauren and Veronica had finally made it to the table but when they did, they grabbed five sets of burgers and five packages of onion rings before the two teenagers called Betty, Jughead, and Archie with them to eat somewhere quieter than the noisy waiting room - where an older woman was currently yelling at all of the teenagers to be quiet. 

The group of friends ended up going to the spot where Sheriff Keller had held his interview with Archie earlier that day. The five teenagers sat there in comfortable silence as they ate their food and had small conversations with each other before Betty turned her attention onto Archie with a soft smile plastered across pink lips. "Your dad would be so proud of you, Arch," the Cooper girl told the red headed teenager.

"Yeah," Jughead muttered in agreement as he slowly nodded his head while he chewed up his second burger. "You've really been a rock-star God through all of this," the Jones teenager continued once he swallowed up his food with a slight awkward chuckle escaping through his lips a moment after.

The Lanzetta teenager shot Archie a small but comforting smile before she also added to Jughead and Betty's reassuring words with a small joke, "Clark Kent, who? I only know Archie Andrews." It was something that Lauren was very known for. Lauren, even though she did joke to cover up her own emotions, liked to use jokes to make her friends feel better or to even crack a tiny smile.

However, Lauren didn't get that smile from Archie like she was used to getting from her joking ways. The Lodge girl was the second one to take notice of the crestfallen expression on the Andrews teenager's face after the Lanzetta girl. "Archie, what is it?" Veronica worriedly asked her boyfriend before she softly told him as she glanced over to the other three teenagers at the small table, "talk to us. Maybe we can help."

The Andrews teenager sat there for a few tense minutes after Veronica's helping words before he finally shook his head and confessed with heavy emotions clouding his voice, "guys, there's something I haven't told you, 'cause I'm so... I'm so ashamed." Archie was immediately pulled back into the memory of last night with a slight flinch of his body before he recalled the events to his friends and girlfriend, "after the guy fired, I should've rushed to my dad straight away or I should've tackled the guy, but I was paralyzed."

Archie brought both of his hands to cover his eyes as he could feel tears building up behind them before he slowly continued with his story with a slight stutter to his words, "I-I didn't move, not even when the guy walked up to me and he held his gun to my head. And I just closed my eyes. I don't know how long." The Andrews teenager lightly shrugged his shoulders as he thought about what he was saying before he commented, "long enough for the guy to have taken my dad's wallet, I guess."

Archie took a deep breath as he slowly brought his teary eyes up to look at each face around the small table before he concluded with his tale of the events from Pop's diner with sadness and heartbreak flowing throughout his voice, "but I didn't open them until I heard the bell. Pop's bell. Which meant he was gone."

"Arch," the Lanzetta girl softly called out to her best friend to gain his attention before she murmured, "you can't blame yourself." Lauren gently shook her head as she tried to help Archie with his emotions and his guilt for what happened, "you made the right choice or you would have also be in the hospital as well. You couldn't have done anything else differently to save Freddy."

The Andrews teenager instantly began to shake his head in disagreement before he exclaimed, "that's not true, Lala. I could've done anything to comfort my dad. To get the gun away from that guy." Archie, once again, squeezed his brown irises closed before he mumbled, "I was a coward. And now, me and my dad were witnesses - Pop Tate, too. This guy may have my dad's wallet and all of his information." The Andrews teenagers slowly opened his eyes after a tense moment before he glanced at each face around the table and asked with fear shining throughout his voice, "what if he comes back?" 

The table in Riverdale General was only silent for barely half a second before Veronica quietly mumbled after her boyfriend's story, "oh, Archie." The Lodge girl immediately pulled her boyfriend into her chest and rubbed her fingers along Archie's red hair as he cried into her shoulder while she tried to comfort him as best as she could. 

The Lanzetta teenager felt her heart completely break at the sight of her usually smiley and happy best friend become this mess of sadness and tears. Lauren hated that she couldn't do anything to help Archie, either. She wished that she could do more for the Andrews family but she sadly couldn't.

However, the Lanzetta girl hoped that the guys who her father had contacted would be able to find something out on the streets about who could have done this. Lauren knew the members of the Lanzetta mob were very good at their jobs so she knew they would find out something - even if it was something small. Lauren knew between her, Jughead, and Betty that they could figure this out with whatever information that her family could find. 

Lauren didn't like the idea of this guy in the hood walking around the small town of Riverdale. Yeah, she knew there was bad guys always around like the drug dealers and gangs on the Southside and the corrupt politicians and lawyers on the Northside but this guy rubbed Lauren the wrong way. It might be because the guy in the hood went after someone that Lauren thought as family but she swore as she stared at the heartbroken Andrews teenager that she was going everything in her power to find the person who did this to Fred Andrews and make them wish that they had never been born.  

[beesmygod]

this is what riverdale is about (part 4)

part 1

part 2

part 3

i’m back, to continue from where we left off. obnoxiously, i’m going to take a minute to plug my patreon, which is primarily for my webcomic but i also do movie reviews and talk about bad books i find so if you like these posts, you’ll probably like those as well. all i ask....is one dollar a month.

anyway fuck that let’s get back into this.

images are from the riverdale wiki

SEASON ONE (PART 2):

the last picture show: immediately this show reveals that our beloved jughead has been living in a nearly abandoned drive-in that he also works at. too bad for him, because it’s closing down. hilariously, literally nobody in his circle of friends cares and call his make-shift house a crack den. owned. its revealed an anonymous buyer purchased it from the town and the mayor decided to sell it to whoever.

archie brings flowers to his teacher-girlfriend’s recital and when he and grundy (and his dad) head to pop’s for a good ol malt or whatever, betty confronts him about his relationship. betty is hurt when he says grundy believed in him when no one else did and goes home with renewed purpose: take grundy down.

veronica’s mom is caught having a heated argument with a member of the southside serpents gang next to a dumpster by cheryl who, as she delights in misery and disaster, captures it all on camera. she shows veronica, who confronts her mother who brushes her off.

betty lures grundy into a fake interview for her school paper instead of going to the police. betty seems to be determining all of this based on the fact that she didnt have any social media until a year ago, which really makes me question betty’s journalistic bonefides. its framed like this means she didn’t exist before she got a twitter or whatever. its really weird. more relevant is that the only record of a geraldine grundy.....WAS AN OLD WOMAN WHO DIED 7 YEARS AGO!!!!! she takes this information to archie as well, who doesn’t care at all. he’s way too horny to care.

betty breaks into grundy’s vw bug and finds a gun and her real i.d. with her real name. archie is still too horny to care, even though betty (again, really overstepping her journalistic bounds) says that grundy might have killed jason (BASED ON THE EXISTENCE OF A GUN BETTY!!! COME ON). archie finally asks grundy straight up what the fuck is going on and she cops to trying to escape from an abusive husband, hence the gun and fake names.

jughead finds out that archie’s dad’s construction company won the bid to destroy the drive-in. its a bad time to be jughead. he tries to ask archie’s dad not to tear down the drive-in. through this convo we learn that jughead’s dad was fired from andrews construction several years ago for theft. a scene after this reveals that veronica’s mom is facilitating the purchase of the drive-in with the mayor pn behalf of her incarcerated husband.

i’m so glad the wiki reminded me of this line, word for word: everyone (and i mean literally everyone in town) goes to the drive-in for one last hurrah, where the southside serpents are guffawing up a storm. veronica somehow silences them by saying “You know what happens to a snake when a Louboutin heel steps on it? Shut the hell up or you’ll find out.“ it sucks so bad. veronica then witnesses her mother having an encounter with the same gang member who she is revealed to be paying to drive down the value of the drive-in property so hiram lodge can buy it for cheap.

archie and grundy are caught in a passionate embrace after betty’s mom reads her diary and goes on the warpath, rightfully telling her to get the fuck out of town or she’ll reveal her to be a child molester. grundy agrees to leave and archie is heartbroken. the last show of geraldine this season is her ogling two teen boys. horrible. leave, woman.

jughead leaves his shitty home and on his way out is accosted by the same gang member who was talking to hermoine lodge and is revealed to be....JUGHEADS DAD!!!!!!!!!! whatever.

heart of darkness: the town is abuzz with jason’s upcoming funeral and the teens of riverdale are fighting over who gets to take the dead kids spot as captain of the football team in a really normal and not at all super ghoulish way. archie is working his heart out now that his favorite teacher/pedophile has fled town. he has his time wasted by a member of the pussycats, valerie, who nets him a meeting with a music songwriter who tells archie he doesn’t have time for his shit. its a weird and totally pointless scene in the long run. it doesnt matter because archie’s music thing never comes to anything. the guy tells archie later, when he returns with sheet music, that his songs suck shit and he hates his music and to get out of his office.

jason and polly’s (betty’s sister) relationship seems to be at the center of whatever happened to jason, so betty starts asking around town about her sister, by using dates as a cover to ask probing questions to members of the football team. she also tries asking her father, who explains that polly and jason had a fight, polly tried to kill herself and so was shipped off to a mental institution. learning about jason’s death fucked her up again so they shan’t be exposing her to more sordid info about the events. the only information they get is that jason was selling drugs to raise money to leave town.

betty and jughead trace this thread to find out why jason would want to leave town but veronica is already finding out firsthand after she is invited to the blossom mansion for the world’s worst sleepover before the memorial (cool timing): the blossoms are all insane. they make their money on maple syrup, using the funds to build riverdale as we know it. veronica and cheryl bond over their awful parents and versonic encourages cheryl to act out at jason’s memorial FOR SOME REASON. KNOWING FULL WELL WHO CHERYL IS.

demonstrating extremely normal judgement, betty and jughead plan to raid jason’s room during the memorial to find clues. cheryl goes full hamlet, throwing herself on the coffin and weeping during her eulogy. they use this as cover to sneak away and go commit the worst social faux-pax you truly can do. however, they are interrupted by cherly’s senile grandmother, nana rose, who mistakes her for polly and reveals polly and jason were engaged. 

betty takes this information to her father who reveals he already knows but forbid the arrangement because the blossoms and the coopers have been trying to kill each other for decades over the whole maple syrup empire thing. betty and jughead later suspect her dad broke into the sheriff's office to steal his files related to uhhh everything i guess; a hunch which turns out to be correct.

meanwhile veronica’s mom is sent a live snake by the serpent gang, calls big strong fred andrews to come save her and then asks him for a job.

faster pussycats! kill! kill!: first of all fuck, the name of this ep.

archie, for some reason because i guess he doesn’t know what embarrassment is, decides he’s going to play an original song he wrote for the school talent show. he immediately gets stage fright at the try-outs and wusses out. veronica goes behind his back to sign him up anyway. thanks, asshole!

valerie, from the last ep, quits the pussycats because josie is slightly more stressed than usual about uhhh the talent show. also because she has a crush on archie for some reason.

hermoine, while acting as fred andrews’ new secretary, realizes he’s fucking BROKE. why’d he hire her? who knows. too late now. she suggests firing some people (for example............her, maybe, fred) but fred cant bear it...and is hoping to be saved by the newest construction job he doesn’t know that hermoine is manipulating under the table. much like his son, fred is now too horny to care and they make out while veronica watches awkwardly.

the remaining pussycats try to figure out what to do about their missing member problem. josie’s mom helpfully lays out that they need a strong woman of color, but not one prettier or more talented than josie. enter...VERONICA!!! who is miffed because archie replaced her with valerie in the talent show duet. veronica is now scientifically less pretty and talented than josie by show standards, which just rules because i love thinking that there are teen power rankings in riverdale.

betty and jughead make their way to visit polly at The Sisters Of Quiet Mercy which is literally the best name for a goth cover band in the world. surprise! polly is pregnant with jason’s baby. polly reveals she and jason planned to run away together, but she was caught by her parents and sent away. she then awkwardly asks how jason is and someone has to break the news to her.

josie’s dad makes a brief appearance, which i absolutely do not remember at all. i thought he only showed up in season 3 which makes mayor mccoys character arc way more awkward. anyway, the mccoy family, the andrews and the lodges all have dinner together to discuss business and its awkward as all hell. no one at the table likes the andrews.

betty straight up asks her dad if he killed jason and her mom laughs her ass off at the idea of betty’s soft white suburban ham shank looking dad being able to kill a weed much less a human. keep that in mind.

veronica’s mom forges veronica signature on a form allowing andrews construction to move ahead with the job.

jughead and betty kiss after talking about how they arent their parents. keep that in mind. anyway, betty takes jughead to a car polly mentioned that full of EVIDENCE. they take picture of it and leave the car to go tell the sheriff because i guess suddenly no one has cellphones.  jughead and betty return with the sheriff later to find the car has been light up by an unknown person. almost immediately after, bughead tries to rescue polly at the institution only to find she’s already bailed. welp.

josie and valerie make up and all four pussycats perform. josie’s dad walks out on her performance? harsh. cool dad moves.

archie sings and the crowd loves it. who gives a shit.

a kid died, guys. come on.

[hayleyxabelle-blog]

Riverdale Theories/Guesses and Questions Season 3:

Just a few new guesses:

-Given what certain cast members have written on Twitter/Insta about new projects filming elsewhere/missing or being missed on the Riverdale set/relocating permanently to LA I think we might lose several characters for good. Not just supporting, minor ones this time either a la Midge/Joaquin/Dillon and Ben. We may see some fairly well known ones go this time that we are more invested in.....

- My guesses are we may see Hiram, Mayor/Attorney McCoy and Ethel written out for good.

- Things don’t look good for Moose. I think he may end up at the SOQM conversion wing/get taken out by the GK.

- Alice and Gladys will have a showdown/verbal battle/be enemies. We know Madchen and Gina have both been on set very recently.

- Gladys will cause issues for Falice and Bughead.

- I hope Gina and Trinity are both upgraded to series regular for Season 4. They are amazing as Gladys and Jellybean and the Jones Yard is a fab new filiming location that has so much scope!

- I think the actor cast as Edgar will be another iconic/cult fave actor surprise big casting. Apparently it’s someone elusive and very very well known. I’m thinking maybe someone along the lines of Eddie Furlong, Freddie Prince Jnr, Anthony Head or the guy who played Spike in Buffy TVS etc, etc.

- Evelyn knows something or is involved in the seizure epidemic. It’s got to be something that’s easy to administer to certain people via food or drink. It’s not the Fizzle Rocks because it’s not affected Everyone who has taken them (Moose, Kevin haven’t had a seizure and they were taking them.)

- Are the seizures limited to the women/female teens of Riverdale only somehow? Not one male has had one so far.

- I really hope we don’t lose Hermione as I love Marisol but I’m not sure she’s been on set for some one either....I feel like she’ll survive though. Same with Penelope because I love Nat Boltt!

- I have a feeling Edgar isn’t the GK. it’s too obvious and they’ve spent too long building The Farm up to only have it be around for the last half of S3’s episodes.

- Venronica May find herself in a love triangle with Reggie and Archie.

- Archie will continue to make stupid decisions. He better bring Vegas back safely when he returns to Riverdale.

- Hermione has her reasons for what she is doing by seeming to go along with Hiram. There’s a deeper motivation than that she’s just become a one dimensional gangsters moll puppet.

- We may have seen the last of Penny Peabody for good which is a shame because Brit Morgan is a fabulous character actress and deserved a much better chance to show off her chops than she was given because PP was never really given enough development IMO.

- Alice and Betty will rebuild their relationship. I still have faith that we’ll see Alice turn it around and see Madchen back at her best with one waspy zinger one liners and verbal sparring/acid queen Alice characterisation that everyone is missing.

- I think Edgar gives Alice the moonstone ring we saw on Madchens ring finger in a BTS shot, not FP. I don’t know why I think this but does Alice maybe go through some sort of commitment/marriage with Edgar? Hope not but I have a gut feeling she might.....

- There will always be unfinished business with Gladys and FP. The family unit may end appearing to be pretty much back together, even if we don’t see any overt romantic scenes between FP and Gladys I think it will be left deliberately ambiguous so that the Writers can take it either way if they want to.

- There’s going to be an FP and Fred (and maybe Tom Keller) team up. I hope if hey kill off Sierra they don’t kill of Tom. Martin Cummings is a real asset and there so much great scope for his character that he writers can utilise for the Hot Dads Of Riverdale moments and the fans love him, Skeet and Luke on screen working together, quite rightly!!

- Veronica will not even address the fact that Archie basically crapped all over her after everything she did to get him out of Juvie, that will be swept under the carpet as only the Riverdale writers can do!

- I cannot remotely figure out why the writers made a point to have Gladys say that Hiram wanted Archie and Jughead ‘off the chessboard’ because they were such a big threat. Why would 2 16 yr olds be a threat to a major mobster drug dealer? Or why Hiram would poison his own daughter into a seizure, accidentally or otherwise. TBH I hope he writers can tie that thread up well because it’s a massive stretch even for Riverdale!!

I’d love to hear your thoughts/discuss any theories you have so hit me up with some questions....

[floggingink]

Riverdale, “Chapter Twenty: Tales from the Darkside”

THIS ISN’T DOWN TO THE WIRE, KEVIN

I think most of the references this ep went over my head, as I am not a classic horror connoisseur, but I’m giving it the old college try

CHUCK AND HIS 18-INCH WAIST IS BACK!

Sixth period is Intro to Film: for starters, the opening text crawl is from the beginning of the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre, and they did this to placate Jughead, who has an amazing episode this week in that he fucking survives to the end of it

oh yeah, Betty got Mr. Phillips killed!

I like that in response to the circumstances Betty and Jughead have started sinning MORE

Jug’s snake tattoo has a little crown on it, because history will not be denied/he’s a dweeb

Jughead’s being very dutifully “You didn’t do anything wrong, etc.,” and Betty absolutely cuts him off like, “BUT HOW THE FUCK?”

he calls her “Poirot,” which is like Betty calling him a rebel without a cause

ah, the poster of which is by his bed! Jughead has a bedroom!!!! you’ve earned it, champ!

Sexy, aesthetic Southside: I don’t remember if Penny Peabody had crimped hair the last time she and Jughead met, but it’s straight outta 00’s Avril Lavigne and I love it

the Kentucky Derby blinders Jughead has for his father are Riverdale’s truest tragedy. FP is doing him so wrong

Jughead is going to be Penny’s “transportation advisor,” because he’s such a good driver

LOVED the Kill Bill typewriter “Archie & Jughead” titles

What damn high school in America: you know Jughead just totally skipped class and sauntered into Riverdale High in his fucking jacket. now that his English teacher is gone, what’s the fucking point? can he still run his paper?

Gay?!: Cheryl calls them Bert and Ernie as she shoves them aside like they were made of papier-mâché (Bert and Ernie are life partners)

I like Jughead’s sort of layered expression when he’s asking Archie for help/telling Archie he’s going to help him, like he’s slightly smiling when he talks about the Ghoulies “stunt”

Archie COMMENDABLY says NOTHING about the huge crate full of drugs (it’s not POSSIBLY full of drugs, or even pancake mix) he’s about to get his prints all over. Riverdale would never have them pick up a like a metal Law & Order box, it’s got to be like a fucking pirate chest

Archie & Jug in the truck was presh. Archie had a lot of Fred-esque lines, but I think he’s filtering his true fears about Jughead ENDING UP IN PRISON, WHICH IS WHERE HE IS HEADED, into father-speak, and Jughead, whose father blows, is like I DON’T KNOW, DAD, I’M LIVING MINUTE TO MINUTE HERE

—which is very traumatized, you know? like when you’re growing up, if you’re too hassled and anxious you get holes in your developing brain because it’s too focused on constantly being in fight-or-flight survival mode to the detriment of learning how to be a person? Jughead doesn’t have time for anything that isn’t literally getting to the end of today, possibly sleeping with Betty

I like how Archie’s fantasy does NOT include college, which he doesn’t care about

Jughead doubts it: GQ tells me the East Village is still around, Jughead

not even in his dreams does Archie imagine Veronica would NOT be living on Park Avenue

I like the possibility-thread of “Even worse than jail” being cut off by the flat

Jughead wants to call Betty, his fixer, but then they’re like, How about the sheriff’s son?

would Kevin even have helped them out? he’s not into the shady anymore! he’s post-Joaquin!

Jughead has grand movie-thoughts about his own persona but has not “played it cool” once in his life

OH GREAT, IT’S TONY TODD. IT’S THE FUCKING CANDYMAN. GREAT. GREAT. HOW THE FUCK. WHAT. THE FUCKING—WHAT????????

Jughead only has $18 and he carries it with him wherever he goes

Jughead RELEASES Archie from his friendship debt before getting into McGinty’s truck, because HE’S ABOUT TO DIE

“DON’T LOOK UNDER THAT TARP”

JUGHEAD TAKING HIS LAST LOOK AT ARCHIE IN THE REARVIEW

The Blossom spawn: when Tony Todd fucking invoked Jason fucking Blossom, on top of everything else, ON TOP OF EVERYTHING ELSE, I had a fucking myocardial infarction

McGinty throwing out the time warp phrase “for just a hot minute”

okay the lighting in the truck makes his eyes reflect these tiny pinpoints of white out of the beyond-the-grave voids of his eyes and that Judgement Day shit is on the radio and Jughead is like, this is too much atmosphere even for me

“IN THE BLACK OF THE HOOD IS THE LIGHT OF GOD, AND WHEN YOU SEE IT, YOU WILL DIE.” WHAT? WHAT???? WHAAAAATTTTT???????

and then Archie sees a zombie deer. he sees like a fawn with its fucking skin blistered off. he sees a fucking Chernobyl deer. walking precisely the line between Riverdale and Greendale. great. Greendale is full of ghosts. Jughead is in a death truck driven by the Riverdale Reaper’s sixth victim or something. GREAT. GREENDALE IS FULL OF GHOSTS! GREAT!

Jughead wears his watch face very rakishly on the inside of his wrist

for a hot second, I thought the flies were bees. I did think they were bees. I did think they were doing Candyman

BECAUSE IT’S FUCKING TONY TODD!!!!!!!

you know Jughead was going to look under the tarp. you fucking knew it. he’s in act two of a horror movie. he’s going to relay this story later and say he didn’t look under the tarp? what’s under the tarp? WHAT’S IN THE BOX

deer too dead even to still walk around

I’ve seen this like three times and I can’t tell you what the fuck he’s eating in that shitty cafe. steak? Jell-O? kitten flesh?

the way he says “I’m no thrill-seeking sicko,” sucking on the S’s

the single fly buzzing around McGinty’s shoulder as he tells the Reaper story was like a single further death omen and if it turned out Jughead was already a zombie like in that comic you know, I would’ve fucking bought it, fuck it, what the fuck

some people THINK a lynch mob got him? there was a RUMOR lynch mob? or there was DEFINITELY a lynch mob that only MIGHT HAVE lynched the right person??? I’M GONNA NEED SOME CLARIFICATION, POP TATE

California in my experience is exactly where you should be to pray to the devil

I loved how fast things went incredibly south in the diner. the thud of the check, McGinty saying Jughead would pay, Jughead beings like, Pardon me? Jughead about to be LEFT BEHIND

“YOU’RE SINNERS, BOTH OF YOU. CAREFUL OR YOU’LL TASTE THE REAPER’S BLADE NEXT.”

Archie > Dawson: Archie is, simultaneously, the worst and best person to have along with you inside a horror movie, because he’s sort of dense but also will never give you up, never let you down, desert you (if it’s a Good Archie episode, which this unmistakably is). Archie is the only character I would buy forgetting he was there and miraculously he shows back up in the nick of time

next we have Archie and Jughead driving around some more with the Friday the 13th echoing exhale sound effect in the background, just for funsies

Fifth period is AP English: Penny’s fucking Arctic exploration crate has all this HP Lovecraft motif lore on the side of it, so, cool, I guess it contains screaming desiccated souls or something (Lovecraftian Ghouls eat flesh, by the way)

“Damn good coffee”: aaaaaaaaand coming out to meet them is a Soviet spy wearing a beret, wheeled out by Karla, with an AK on his hip. Greendale contains the trapped spirits of everyone who died there in the 70’s

These students are legally children: Jughead is screwed. Jughead is so screwed. Jughead is one part vodka, two parts orange juice

Archie’s coloring lends itself well to being bathed in that pink Pop’s lighting I love

Jughead has recovered enough to call McGinty (who isn’t named aloud) “Mr. American Gothic”

JUGHEAD WANTS TO GO TO THE LIBRARY WITH ARCHIE. he doesn’t want to do drug runs. he wants to snoop around with his best friend, because despite having a gang in his bloodline, Jughead is REALLY not a gang member. when he gets to choose what he wants to do, he just wants to do research. he wants to be Giles, okay

endless tragedy with Archie’s “Next day, for sure.”

I would absolutely believe that Riverdale’s jail’s visiting hours are actually “sunup to sundown” as opposed to like “eight to four”

how precious is he, steeling himself to see his father’s slashed face

“You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

apparently Penny’s surveillance video has some sort of infrared lighting quality

I like how Penny specifies that Jughead is not to raise his voice to her, a classic scarier-than-violence threat

is this why FP was so freaked that Jughead would owe her? not because she’s naturally treacherous to everyone, but because he knows she wants recompense for his betrayal? FP, you’re awesome start to finish

Jughead has not done like a SINGLE THING WRONG this entire time that hasn’t been at the behest of him trying to FIX everything single thing that his father set him up for, dog

I do not deserve a whole segment dedicated to Josie and her white manicure, yet here I am!

Josie and the janitor have an understanding, because people who stick around school after hours are usually slightly strange and have to stick together

“I don’t need a bodyguard! I’m not Whitney. Yet.”

Certified pedigree: Mayor McCoy is another Scary Riverdale Mom, but I’d say she’s the least scary of them WRT her daughter (not the southsiders, although jury’s still out on how much of that is Alice’s fault)

Josie’s vocal polyps swell when she’s stressed

her denim one-piece? only you, Josie

Cheryl’s hair: Classic Disney princess hair this episode. Classic Cheryl. a Classic

Cheryl sums up Josie’s guilt as being about “sinning” which means therefore the Black Hood may notice, as opposed to something like “You feel like you’re betraying your friends,” which would be the human response

Chuck Clayton is thoroughly charming throughout. if you just watched him this episode, you’d be like, How bad could he really have been?

he came prepared with the knowledge that Josie “loves her cheese fries”

Chuck’s leather jacket is very nice. all the boys should just be wearing leather jackets

Josie is partaking of a “eucalyptus steam”

“Nick St. Creature”

Cheryl’s measured response to Josie calling her controlling was perfect. she says she’ll never be able to “repay” her “debt,” because Cheryl is ALL ABOUT tit-for-tat, emotional burdens handled via business deals, paying off favors, clearing her side of the column

I also like her Blossom pun

The 2001 Josie and the Pussycats movie was a masterpiece: VALERIE! MELODY! VALERIE’S SWEATER! MELODY’S SKIRT! VALERIE’S CURLS! MELODY’S AFRO! “WOMEN ARE SUPPOSED TO TREAT EACH OTHER BETTER THAN THIS.” “PRIDE COMETH BEFORE THE FALL.”

Fwoopy hair is the best hair: Melody is not happy but she is the goddess of my life and I hope she can sense that from this distance

why IS Josie doing the solo thing? she did claw them in the back!

ooh, he’s smooth. he’s smooth with the Pop’s thing. Chuck did that

Josie’s “YEAH MHM” nod when Chuck says he “doesn’t have the greatest track record” and rolls her eyes at him “going to church”

“Why? To objectify models?”

he wants to draw comics, because he is a creative? Chuck and Jughead and their leather jackets would have a great time at the library together, after they make up (with hugs)

did I say Archie looked good in the pink light? fucking Chuck and Josie look phenomenal

Pulp Fiction diner dancing!

I’ve seen Brick like thirty times: the two of them synchronized jitterbugging together, I did not have the patience to Google the name of the dance, like fully won me over. is Chuck good now? I’m fucking on Chuck’s list now. like is that all it took for me? I am a weak bitch

“YOU’RE A DAMNED FOOL.”

stay strong, Chuck! don’t fuck this up!

is Mayor McCoy lying on the spot about her hate mail mentioning Josie? just to scare her into compliance?

“Taking a few art classes does not a saint make.”

Cheryl’s sheaths: Cheryl’s wearing huge thick ankle-strap platforms again with a VERY leggy romper

okay shut up because Cheryl actually says “What’s in the box?” and Brad Pitt felt a little bit of his life force drain from his body

Gay.: What up with Cheryl’s game here? was she preemptively putting things in Josie’s locker on the off-chance she would need to get a rival presence out of Josie’s life? I would like a reason, but I don’t need one, because Cheryl is so beyond my mind to comprehend I take solace simply in basking in her wake. like, she found a pig’s heart? of course she did. of course you did, Cheryl

Cheryl’s a chaos angel from hell: “For all we know, he’s the one sending your mom those letters, too” is SUCH an overreach if Josie had had time to think about it for two seconds, but she does not have such two seconds, thus it is a master move by Cheryl Blossom

Chuck’s puppy eyes

Josie knows what she diiiiiiiiid!

THEY GOT ME FOR THE SECOND TIME! GODDAMMIT!

nicely specific throat-slashing, right in the polyps

I’m writing a scene where it’s gay.: Cheryl is listening to Josie sing as she draws, in the greatest reveal in television history (at least since “You’ve done a bad thing, Daddy,” which feels like it happened fifty-eight years ago) (is this actually gay? am I being #blessed with Gothic lesbian villainy?)

Every triangle has three corners, every triangle has three sides: Betty and Jughead literally sleeping together I WOULD ASSUME means they’re having sex except I’m like 0-4 on this stuff, I’m not taking anything as a given

Best costume bit: Betty’s flower decal sweater

VERONICA: How’s he been dealing with it? BETTY: WHAT’S HE BEEN DOING?

Veronica’s tiny poofy magenta skirt and EXTREMELY high heels

“Poor Kevin. He’s like a character in a lost Tennessee Williams play.” (Archie does not know Tennessee Williams)

Sheriff Keller is REMARKABLY forthcoming, in that I think he assumes Betty is going to dig around until she’s found this stuff out anyway, so he may as well show her the ACTUAL EVIDENCE PHOTOS now

Kevin is a cashmere-besweatered angel who plays RPG’s and drinks milk

dare I spy a Tarantino split-screen?

The female gaze: Tom Keller is jacked and this just complicates everything

the extent to which Veronica can be read as absolutely hitting on him while actually prying him for information while ostensibly offering comfort is a tribute to Camilla Mendes, James DeWille, 60,000 years of human speech

the animal targets on the wall as like, art?

aw, Kev took the floor. honestly thought he might have a bunk bed for like, his bears

God bless jingle-jangle: can you imagine having it in your obituary that you were “a jingle-jangle addict”? can someone finagle this for mine? is this blog a legal document?

50 Shades of Betty: I love how off the rails, if you will, Betty is this episode. she’s lost the forest for the trees a bit and it’s GREAT. she’s such a fucking oddball. Lili Reinhart’s massive eyes are like laserbeams of manic certainty

Summer + Blair = Veronica: Veronica is the only person with sense this entire episode. like what would it have been like if it was Veronica and Jughead in the first part? and Archie seeing Josie get a pig’s heart! AND CHERYL IN SHERIFF KELLER’S MAN-SWEAT BASEMENT

it appears the singing bass salesman made a stop at the Kellers’ after he hit up FP Jones

Please protect Betty: Betty’s expression of defiant stoicism throughout her father’s apology on her behalf and Keller explaining himself even further

“Where-oh-where do you think you’re going, Sheriff?” TO LIVE HIS LIFE, BETTY?

he is wearing a very Black Hood outfit of the leather jacket (!) over a flannel with jeans

love the split-second shot of the camera flash

Veronica was rich: of course Veronica’s in like thigh-high boots or whatever

OOOOOOOOHHH HE’S DOING THAAAAAAAT WITH HEEEERRRRRRR!

Veronica was 1) correct and 2) says “broment”

Pop keeps delicate teacups around for “fancy” orders

Cheryl’s structured red coat!

can you believe Jughead left BEFORE Pop got that phone call?

THE RECKONING, Y’ALL, IT’S HERE! MAYBE ONE SINGLE MORE PERSON WILL DIE!

NEXT WEEK TWENTY HOURS FROM NOW: Cheryl makes FP clean up a milkshake, and I enjoy this very special purchase

[cooperjones2020]

What’s Past is Prologue, What to Come, pt. 4

Summary: He wanted to hit whoever made Betty cry. He wanted to hit Betty so she’d keep crying. Interrelated vignettes from Jughead Jones’s obsession with Betty Cooper. Dark!Jug, Creepy!Jug, Stalker!Jug, generally Sociopathic!Jug.

A/N: We’re ditching the Shakespeare. Instead, I leave you with this quote which is delightfully creepy out of context: “Since he longed to take possession of something deep inside them, he needed to slit them open” (Kundera, The Unbearable Lightness of Being, 215).

TW: implied child abuse (for this chapter specifically, check the other tags on ao3)

(parts one, two, and three)

ao3—>http://archiveofourown.org/works/11394858/chapters/26628525

By the time he stood across from her in the dusty classroom that housed five ancient PC monitors, two typewriters, and a microfiche reader, Jughead had given up fighting his obsession with Betty Cooper. He had given up fighting the way it hurt when she looked at Archie. He liked the hurt, liked the pain, liked the reminder he was alive.

When Betty and Archie seemed to be alright, after the disastrous night of the back to school dance, Jughead felt the embers in his stomach die down. But that ease of tensions came coupled with a new awareness of Betty. She seemed lighter to him. Not that she felt that way—he could still sometimes see her struggle with the ashes of her feelings, could see her face fall when she thought no one was looking. But the air around her seemed to be lighter, as if some of the threads that tied to her to Archie had been cut.

When he appeared in the doorway of the student newspaper office, he did so silently, so she didn’t notice him where she was bent over her work behind one of the ancient computer monitors. She wore a burgundy top today, new, one he hadn’t seen and that provided a marked contrast to her normal colour palette. He liked it. He liked the possibilities it represented.

“If print journalism is dead, what am I doing here?” he asked her, leaning against the doorway with one leg crossed over the other.

“The Blue and Gold isn’t dead, Juggie. It’s just dormant,” she replied, pressing her hands together in front of her heart, before running a finger along a dusty keyboard. “But waking up. You’re writing a novel, right? About Jason Blossom’s murder?”

“I am. Riverdale’s very own In Cold Blood.” He plucked a magnifying glass out of a pencil cup and held it up in front of him, looking at Betty through it.

“Which started out as a series of articles. I’m hoping you’ll come write for the Blue and Gold.” She looked so hopeful, so earnest and untouchable, he was a goner before he even walked in.

He tried anyway. “I just don’t think the school paper’s the right fit for my voice.”

“Juggie, Jason’s death changed Riverdale. People don’t wanna admit that, but it’s true. We all feel it. Nothing this bad was ever supposed to happen here, but it did. I wanna know why.” Every time she called him Juggie, his heart rate slowed down. It had been her nickname for him since they were kids and its effects were just as strong and just as addictive as morphine.

“Would I get complete freedom?” It was a feint, but he was interested in her answer.

“I-I’ll help and edit and suggest but it’s your story. It’s your voice.”

“Doesn’t sound like complete freedom but I’m in.”

“Okay, great. Um, in that case, I have your first assignment.” She did that thing with her hands again, like she was in an old episode of the Donna Reed Show and her body just couldn’t contain its joy. “There’s one person who was at the river on July 4th that no one’s talking about.”

“Dilton Doiley and his scouts.”

“Exactly.”

He brushed his thumb off his nose in gesture of camaraderie and conspiracy and turned to leave. He didn’t need complete freedom. He’d lost it long ago in any case. But, since the dance, and the night he and Archie had joined her and Veronica at Pop’s, he did need increasing access to Elizabeth Cooper.

We crave absolutes. They comfort us. But life is infinitely more complex than that. He was still attempting to untangle the threads that used to bind Betty to Archie when he discovered Archie and Grundy in the music classroom and it fucked everything up. It threw off his entire world axis in which Archie was deserving of Betty and he, Jughead, was not. Then, Betty found out about it. And with that, she threatened to slip back out of his control.

Closer access to Betty Cooper meant many things for Jughead Jones. It meant re-memorizing the smell of her hair and analyzing all the micro expressions that gave him insight into her moods. It meant resuming his game of guessing which underwear she was wearing that day, double points if he figured it out before he saw her bra strap.

It also meant seeing the places her enamel was wearing thin. After Dilton had left and they’d discussed the connotations of Archie being with Grundy at the river’s edge, Betty snapped a pencil in two with the force of the grip of her left hand. But she kept talking as if she hadn’t noticed.

He cut her off, “Betts, promise you’ll sleep on it before you go off the rails. We don’t know for sure what happened.”

She was staring at the cork board over his left shoulder. He could count the veins in the purplish skin beneath her eyes. He knew she wasn’t sleeping.

He slowly reached forward and unclenched her hand, removing the broken pencil pieces and brushing away the splinters that clung to her palm. She didn’t flinch, or even blink, when he touched her fresh half-moon cuts.

He wasn’t really sure how he wound up in a booth at Pop’s with Kevin and Veronica. He’d been typing away on his laptop, content as he was capable of being, when Betty walked in. Next thing he knew, he was ranting about the drive-in to a semi-captive audience. At least she’d bought him a burger again.

“The drive-in closing is just one more nail in the coffin that is Riverdale. No. Forget Riverdale. In the coffin of the American Dream. As the godfather of indie cinema, Quentin Tarantino, likes to say—”

“Please, God, no more Quentin Tarantino references,” Kevin cut him off.

“What? I’m pissed. And not just about losing my job. The Twilight Drive-In should mean something to us. People should be trying to save it.” The drive-in, the diner, the friendly neighborhood Hitchcock blonde to his right, all of the pieces of Riverdale that looked so great on paper. That, cliche as they were, kept him from sliding into the darkness that loomed.

Veronica interrupted his thoughts. “In this age of Netflix and VOD, do people really want to watch a movie in a car? I mean, who even goes there?”

“People who want to buy crack.” Trust the sheriff’s son to dismiss such an iconic emblem of working class Americana and Jughead right along with it.

“And cinephiles and car enthusiasts, right, Betts?” Betty knew what he was talking about, she knew what the drive-in meant to him.

“Totally.” But she wasn’t paying attention to him. He began tapping out a staccato rhythm with his foot.

“Anyway, it’s closing because the town owns it but didn’t invest in it. So when an anonymous buyer made Mayor McCoy an offer she couldn’t refuse—” Jughead stared out the window as he spoke.

“Anonymous buyer? What do they have to hide? No one cares.”

“I do. Also you guys should all come to closing night. I’m thinking American Graffiti. Or is that too obvious?” He directed it at the three of them, but he looked at Betty.

“I vote for anything starring Audrey Hepburn. Or Cate Blanchett.” Surprise, surprise.

“Or The Talented Mr. Ripley. Betty, your choices?”

“Everything okay, B?”

“Yeah, yeah. I’m just thinking. Um…Maybe Rebel Without a Cause?” Betty flicked her eyes at him and he couldn’t stop himself from smiling at her.

He turned his attention back to his dinner and contemplated the possibility that maybe one or two of the threads that used to connect Betty to Archie might now connect to him instead. He vaguely registered Veronica getting up and returning and the sound of the bell on the door jingling behind him.

“Now that’s an odd combo of people,” Kevin said.

Jughead and Betty both turned to look over their shoulders in one motion. It was Archie, Fred, and Grundy. Fuck. He glanced at Betty. Her mouth dropped open.

“I’ll be right back.”

“Betty, no. Don’t.” He made a half-hearted attempt to reach for her, his hand closing on empty air. He wanted to protect her, but what more could he do? She needed to snip the rest of the threads on her own. And truthfully? Archie needed a Betty Cooper-style kick in the ass.

Jughead grimaced at the two of them out of the window.

Again, Veronica’s voice intruded. “What’s happening out there? Do we know? Is it about me?”

Archie’s back was to him, but he could see the hurt and concern all over Betty’s beautiful face. “I have a strong inkling. And no. Also, I’d let it go.”

“Yes, but you’re you and I’m me. You do you, girl. I’ll be back.” He rolled his eyes at Veronica and settled lower in the booth.

“What was it like before she got here? I honestly cannot remember.”

Jughead didn’t respond. He sneered and ate the strawberry off Betty’s milkshake.

His final attempt to save the drive-in had been a bust. Mayor McCoy shot him down and even Fred wouldn’t help him. So, Rebel Without a Cause played to a full house. Of course. Nothing like nostalgia to pack them in.

Jughead watched from the projection room. She didn’t come. Whenever she came to the drive-in, she’d come up to the booth and drag him down to socialize for a while. Or she joined him up there with a blanket and some snacks.

He texted her, a little while after the movie started, but she didn’t respond.

She didn’t come.

The chill woke Jughead early the next morning. Indian summer had faded and no one had ever bothered to insulate the projection booth. He registered that he had a novel of a text from Betty sitting unread on his phone. He wasn’t ready to answer her yet.

He ate a stale pop tart and, from his seat next to the projector, he surveyed his dilapidated kingdom. A plastic bag blew across the empty lot. Discarded soda cans and spilled popcorn decorated the grass like some kind of fucked up Christmas tree.

When he could delay it no more, he stood to finish packing.

The Betty box had grown over the years. It took up more than half his backpack space, but he wouldn’t risk leaving it at the trailer. A drunk FP was an unpredictable FP.

Jughead watched the last reel finish winding then did a slow turn around the room that had been his only safe haven the past few months. He grabbed a shirt he’d missed packing, shoved it in his backpack, and, with an old photo of him and Jellybean in hand, closed the door.

He didn’t exactly need to add vandalism to his record, but seeing as Fred was the one tearing the drive-in down, he reckoned he was pretty safe. So he marked out “JUGHEAD JONES WUZ HERE” in black spray paint along with an outline of his crown on the side of the concession stand.

Then he tossed the can of spray paint away, to join the litter on the ground. When he turned to leave, FP was standing behind him. Jughead looked away so they wouldn’t make eye contact.

His father and the Serpents had been hanging around the drive-in for months, but he only sought him out when he hit the level of drunk of slurring his words and talking about reuniting their family. It was a little early, even for FP, but Jughead still didn’t want to talk to him.

When his father spoke though, his words were clear: “They’ll tear that booth down too. Raze the whole place, send it to the junkyard. And us with it.”

“Yeah. Or maybe they’ll save it. All the pieces. Store it in the town hall attic and rebuild it in a hundred years. Wonder who the hell we were.” The image made him smile. Then he remembered who he was talking to and cut his eyes away to frown at the ground.

“So where you gonna live now?”

“I’ll figure it out, Dad. I always do.” He just barely stopped himself from checking his dad with his bag as he walked past. That kind of aggression never worked out well for him with FP, and he didn’t need any more surprise injuries that needed explaining away to Betty.

[wits-writing]

Riverdale Reviews: Season 2 Ep 2 “Nighthawks”

[My other Riverdale Reviews here]

With business at Pop’s Chock’lit Shoppe on the decline and the threat of the diner shutting down a near certainty, Betty does what she does best and takes the initiative. She rallies as many people around town as she can to help her save a place that’s been the source of many happy memories for her. This kind of collective effort to save a beloved local establishment is as vintage a plot as classic Archie Comics themselves.

But this is Riverdale, it would never be that simple.

[Full review under the cut]

The place Pop’s holds in the town’s heart is put to the forefront as the episode opens by putting the diner in its early years filled with customers contrasted with its near-abandoned current state with the words “Death Diner” graffitied on it. With Fred’s near-death, people have been avoiding it as it’s become, as Jughead puts it, “the latest casualty in the town’s fight against darkness.” This episode also marks the best spotlight Riverdale has given Alvin Sanders as Pop Tate yet, though he still stays a side character through the story of the episode. Sanders is charming in the role, portraying a man broken by being on the verge of having the thing he loves most in life taken from him. He’s put all of himself into running his diner as a place where he can keep his customers satisfied. A dedication strong enough that he’s memorized his customers’ favorite orders. Seeing Pop in this state makes it easy to understand why Betty would work to save his business, even before she explains her full reasons.

Last time I talked about how Betty didn’t have an active role in the events of the episode and “Nighthawks” does plenty to make up for that. This episode is overall Betty-centric as we see her deal with every cause she’s willing to fight, including saving Pop’s and helping Jug find a way to reduce FP’s sentence. Life has gotten so bleak in Riverdale that her desperation to get a win in any form possible makes her actions feel reasonable, even as her mother dismisses her as the “Patron Saint of Lost Causes.” She associates so much of what’s good about Riverdale with the diner that she doesn’t care if it’s hopeless as she works to organize a “Retro Night” at the restaurant to bring people back and remind them of those happier times.

Betty journey to help hopeless causes extends to FP staring down a minimum of 20 years in prison. Neither her nor Jughead want to see FP go to jail for his part in covering up Jason’s murder, but those 20 years might be the best deal he’ll get out of the situation. So Jughead goes to the Serpents for advice about getting him out, but they offer him something “better.” He meets with the “snake charmer”, Penny Peabody, a lawyer associated with the Serpents who tells him as a “favor.” The one possible way to get FP’s sentence diminished would be to get one of the Blossom’s to vouch for FP’s character during his trial. Easier said than done, as Cheryl wants as much of the chapter in her life revolving around Jason’s death gone as possible. Between that and Cheryl refusing to have the Vixens help with Retro Night at Pop’s, Betty takes her own steps to force Cheryl’s hand in the matter by having a brief “fun girl talk” with her. She blackmails Cheryl, something Jughead earlier said they shouldn’t stoop to, threatening to make the video of Jason’s murder public if Cheryl doesn’t promise to help. It’s the first resurgence of “Dark Betty” this season and a lot of fun to watch.

This week, the main character playing the biggest support role is probably Jughead, since his involvement in the story is about how he relates to the other characters and his surroundings. He’s one of Betty’s key motivating factors and the actions he takes are because of information he’s given rather than what he actively finds. In an ongoing series with an ensemble cast, shifting roles like this are inevitable and Jughead fills that role well this time as he’s there to help Betty at Pop’s on Retro Night and to talk with Veronica when she needs advice on how to deal with her own situation.

Veronica’s home life has become a string of efforts to avoid being in contact with her father, since her perception of him has been permanently shaken by what she learned about him after his arrest. Hiram wants things to be as back-to-normal as possible between them so they can readjust to living under the same roof, even as their butler Smithers helps Ronnie to avoid him. When he tells her that he can’t remember the last time they ate dinner together, she retorts that it was the night he was arrested. When she finally gets the chance to lay her suspicions of him bare, she shows Hermione the letter from last season where Hiram threatened Hermione if she didn’t comply. Her mother says that the letter was a forgery of her own doing so she would do what it took to get her father out of prison. While this is still a 110% shady thing for her parents to do, it’s still enough to make Veronica reconsider giving her father a second chance to be part of her life. She goes to talk to Jughead who tells her that if there’s even the slightest chance Hiram’s actions are genuine, then she needs to take it.

During all of this, the thread of Archie being increasingly on-edge plays out as he hasn’t slept since Fred was shot so he can keep watch over their house during the night, all while seeing the hooded figure everywhere he looks. This state isn’t helped when he learns about Miss Grundy’s death and assumes that it must have been the same hooded killer, due to Grundy’s connection to him. Even when told and shown evidence that it probably wasn’t the same guy, he can’t let his paranoia go and asks Reggie Mantle, now played by Charles Melton replacing last season’s Ross Butler, if he can buy some uppers from him. Reggie as the school’s resident drug dealing student is a good Riverdale take on the character and a distinguishing role that helps establish Melton in his first major appearance this season, though he did appear briefly last episode. Later, when Reggie pulls the stupid “prank” of wearing a black hood while delivering the drugs to Archie, he tells him that nothing will help him be prepared if the killer does come back. (“Only a dumbass lunatic brings a bat to a gunfight.”)

Every one of these threads comes together during Retro Night at Pop’s. Betty attracts people there by getting Josie and the Pussycats to perform (though a cover of “Milkshake” by Kelis being able to attract anyone anywhere is enough to nearly break my suspension of disbelief.) Veronica offers her parents a second chance, which leads to Hiram agreeing to make a “charitable donation” to Pop’s to keep it open. Meanwhile, Alice is there observing the whole event and taking in every dark detail that lies beneath the sheen of nostalgia covering the events at the diner. Jughead and Betty turn over the footage of Jason’s murder to Cheryl for her cooperation in helping FP. With Pop’s saved and FP’s sentence seemingly on the short path to being commuted, the core four declare this to be a win for them.

But winning still comes with a price in Riverdale. Hiram and Hermione talk on their own about how she lied to Veronica about Hiram’s letter and that Hiram’s “donation” was him buying out the diner, but letting Pop Tate stay on as the manager. They’ve been gaslighting Veronica into accepting Hiram back into her life, which is made clear when we see that Smithers, the one person under their roof helping her avoid Hiram, has been replaced as the Lodge’s butler. FP warns Jughead that he needs to avoid Penny Peabody at all costs in the future if she comes looking to have her “favor” payed back. Alice tells Betty about what she observed over the course of the night and how saving Pop’s Chock’lit Shoppe has only given crime a new foothold in Riverdale. Archie gives into his own paranoia as he buys a gun from local survival nut, Dilton Doiley. As that new protection helps Archie to finally sleep again, this episode is capped off with the hooded figure murdering Moose and Midge.

And the reason I didn’t mention Moose and Midge before this is because their lack of presence outside of that ending is one of the major problems this episode. This is Midge’s first appearance outside of brief mentions in season one and she exists to do two things, help establish Reggie as a drug dealer and getting shot. Aside from that, “Nighthawks” is among the most solid offerings Riverdale has had to offer yet. The episode gives a strong story for each of the characters to take part in to one extent or another as the story of season 2 starts to come into clearer focus, since now we know that the hooded figures killings don’t directly tie back to Archie the way he thought.

We’ll see how that mystery carries on next time in “The Watcher in the Woods.”

[heytherejones]

Friends with Benefits Chapter 4

“So about that date.” Jughead’s eyes avoid hers, wiping down the bar with a rag. He’d been sure she’d heard what happened yesterday. Betty wasn’t quiet, screaming at him or when fucking him.

“Still on?” She places a glass on the table, smiling in his direction.

“Relax, I’m teasing. You’re off the hook.” She rolls her eyes, her laughter filling his ears.

“Saw her come in. She’s pretty.” He senses it, jealousy. The way her eyebrows raise at her last statement. He hadn’t had to deal with a jealous girl since Sabrina. The ex who wouldn’t quit.

“Yeah, really.” His eyebrows raise too, nodding once.

—–

“My god, don’t you two ever leave the house.” Archie throws his varsity jacket on the hook as he walks through the front door, his eyes rolling.

“And go out when we could be right here? Are you joking.” Betty doesn’t tear her eyes away from the tv, popping a chip in her mouth, settled between his legs.

“Don’t you ever like go on dates?” Archie starts to make his way to the kitchen, kicking his shoes off in the middle of the hallway.

“This is a date, right now. And you’re ruining it.” Jughead calls after him.

“Whatever.” He yells back.

“Do you want to go out?” Jughead looks down at her, pushing her hair away from her face as he nuzzles her neck. She looks up to him, humor in her eyes as she crunches on another chip.

“That’s funny.” She laughs.

“Why’s he being such a prick?” Jughead shakes his head, taking a chip from the bag.

“Don’t worry about it, I don’t care.”

—–

They’d fallen asleep together in his bed, her head on his chest and leg between his. She hadn’t been home in days. It was an endless cycle of Fred’s attempt at dinners and getting fucked hard every night before bed. His warmth was heating up her pale, icy skin and when she wakes up in the middle of the night, he awakes too, the both of them silent in the late hour. She’d dreamed of him, she always does, waking with an ache between her legs. She whispers that she needs him and it moves quickly from there.

The next minutes were only a blur, frantic hands, desperate kisses, lips trailing over naked skin, clothes being discarded on the floor until we were finally both naked and she pushed him back into the bed, eyes flicking hungrily over his body as she took him in. Every inch of him with her eyes. His heart skipping a beat as his eyes fell on the scars covering her body, speaking of the hard life she had led the last decade and the possessive feeling overwhelmed him again and he push her against his bed.

“Fuck, Betty, I need to taste you.” He pushed her back, her thighs colliding with the mattress and she fell backwards, her elbows crushing hard on the bed, a moan escaping her as he dropped on hid knees in front of her, throwing her legs over his shoulders, licking his lips as he stared at her between her legs before his eyes snapped up to hers, glinting with unrestrained hunger.

“Then do it.” Betty replied defiantly, crossing her ankles behind his neck and pulling him forward.

His head shot forward, tongue pushing into her without warning, hand coming around her thigh, his finger pressing hard against her clit, flicking over it while his tongue swept into her over and over again.

Her stomach tightened, her thighs quivered around his head, her hips bucking upwards, pressing harder against his face as the waves crashed down over her, the tremors wrecking her body, leaving her breathless.

Within moments he was inside of her, her hips shaking in sensitivity still in her post orgasm haze. He’d fucked her so hard he’d been sure he was going to break the bed, wake the whole house. With the way the springs creaked and the wood slammed, Archie surely would have heard next door.

Their pace picked up gradually as they moved together until they were both sweating with exertion, mouths meeting in heavy, bruising kisses. Breathy gasps and slapping skin was all that could be heard. After the first few minutes, he began hitting at a slightly different angle with every thrust, searching for exactly where she needed him, until she saw stars.

“Juggie please.” She moaned and his thrusts got faster and deeper, his teeth sunk into her shoulder gently, encouraged by her prompting and she bucked into him harder.

“Come, Elizabeth.” He growled, voice heavy as he struggled to drive into her even faster, sweaty forehead pressing into the crook of her neck. It wasn’t a minute before she complied with his pleas, shaking around him. He pulls out her and collapses on top of her, both of them breathing heavy.

Between her thighs, traces of the both of them are there, leaving him hungry altogether for her at the sight.

“You’re so cute.” Her sweet voice brings him to snap his head upward, eyes looking over her face, wondering if she had been joking.

“What?”

“Did I not just fuck your brains out two minutes ago?” His eyes brows knit together in confusion. She presses her hand to his shoulder, pushing him over.

“You’re a softy Juggie and you know it.” She laughs, her fingertips running over the baby soft skin of his cheek.

“I love no rules.” She sighs, falling forward to press her cheek to his chest, hugging him with her arms wrapped around his torso tightly. His phone lets out a buzz on the nightstand, the screen illuminating the dark room.

“Archie says we’re being too loud.” He looks over his phone before dropping into the bed, his lips turning up into a smile at her annoyed face.

“What?” He laughs out, hands on her waist and running along her thighs.

“Nothing, just. He called me a bitch in the hallway the other day.” Her voice lowers.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. He thinks I’m using you.”

“Well in that case.” She shrieks as he rolls her over, pressing her into the bed again. He’s in between her legs again, hips pushing forward and her eyes open wide as he rocks into her for the second time.

“Be as loud as you want.”

—–

He hears Archie stir outside the door and he pulls his sweatpants on, leaving Betty passed out and wrapped in his sheets.

“Bro-” Jughead stops him in the hallway, Archie pulls his wrist out of his grasp.

“Why are you snapping at Betty all of a sudden.”

“Just looking out for you.” He shrugs it off, trying to continue down the hall.

“Well if this is the way you’re gonna do it, stop.”

“Wow-” He stops in his tracks and turns back around, mouth opened slightly.

“You’re with Veronica.” Jughead states, Archie’s eyes brows knit together, a look of frustration on his face.

“I know that.” His teeth grit together, eyes narrowing.

“Then why aren’t you focusing your energy on her?”

“Are you-Are you…jealous?” He knows he’s reaching, but with the way he’s acting he couldn’t help but ask.

“Of fucking what?” Archie shouts, shaking his head.

“Me, because of Betty? God, I don’t know, you’re being such a dick lately.” Jughead looks over him, his face scrunched in confusion.

“Betty is my friend.”

“Yeah I got that-”

“I’m not jealous of you, you fucking idiot. I’m looking out for you. Don’t you remember what happened with Sabrina? I’m worried about you.”

“Betty couldn’t hurt me if she tried.” Jughead shakes his head. In all his years he’s known Betty, he’d hardly fought with her.

“Betty could kill an army of men with a few words. She’s pretty tough man. Look, I’m sorry alright, just-”

“-I don’t know, be careful?” Archie puts his hand to his shoulder, eyes filled with concern.

“Yeah, alright.”

—–

“What are you doing here?” A certain blonde walks through the White Wyrm doors, and not the one he’d been inside of just this morning.

“To win you back.” She shrugs her coat off, walking toward the bar.

“Sabrina.” His teeth grit together.

“Kidding, duh. Heard you guys were hiring.” She eyes around the empty bar.

“Seen the man in charge?” He doesn’t answer her, his eyes following her as she walks around the room, running her fingers along the wood of the table.

“You’re not in head of personnel are you? I can think of a few things to get me the job.” She looks him up and down, hand over her chest with a glint of mischief in her eyes. She was Satan.

“Kidding! Jeez. Heard you got a girl.” She smiles, her head snapping up at the sound of the door to the office opening.

“You Sabrina?” The boss looks at her, looking over a piece of paper in his hand.

“Yup!” She waltzes over. The door shuts and he lets put a breath he didn’t know he’s been holding. He’d never want to hurt anyone let alone a woman but God, he was ready to pull each thread of hair out of her head. His brains goes over ever possible worse situation he can prepare himself for, thoughts interrupted minutes later when she walks out, hand on her hip.

“Got the job. Guess you just can’t get away from me, huh? God this’ll be so much fun!”

—–

“Guess who stopped by!” He huffs, slamming her bedroom door open. The smile drops from her face, pencil falling from her hand and onto her mattress.

“No-”

“Yup.” He sighs, kicking off his shoes.

“I’ll be sure to make a visit then.” Her eyes darken, her lip between her teeth.

“Betts, you don’t have to-” Oh but God, does he want her to.

“I’ll wear a skirt for your easy access.” He smiles, thankful for his seductress or a girlfriend.

“Underwear or no?”

—–

“I could just tell her you fucked me, bent over the bar, but what would be the fun in that?” Betty shrugs off her coat, drunk on tequila and young love as she stumbles through the bar doors, pulling Jughead with her. It’s abandon at this late hour, the lights off and chairs turned over on top of the tables.

She pulls him with her, fingers interlocked behind the bar counter, her phone light the only thing illuminating the room and leading the way. She throws her phone and keys to the bar to the counter, bending herself over.

“I’ll be waiting.” She rests her hand on her hands, listening as he unbuckles his belt, pulling his zipper down. He can’t help but laugh at her, buzzed on alcohol and aroused at the sight of her. She’s not wearing any underwear, her skirt has risen slightly at her bent position over the counter.

She’d planned on getting straight to the point, but he sees her bent over like that, perfect view of her with her skirt lifted the way it is and he can’t help but drop to his knees.

“I gotta taste you.” He licks his lips, hands wrapped around her calfs.

“You did this morning-”

“I know but I-” He pushes her legs apart and her feet stumble, his head moving forward, interrupting himself. His tongue was inside of her within seconds, her legs already about to give out.

“Jug, you gotta get straight to the point or I’ll lose it.” He groans against her and she almost falls. As he stands he secures his arm around her waist to keep her grounded. Boxers pushed out of the way and on his hips he sinks into her.

His eyes rolls to the back of his head. After she had confessed she loved him and he did the same to her, fucking her was so much more intense. He still fucked her like he wanted to hurt her, but it was all the more loving and intense. He could feel it, the way she’d look at him, the way she’d be looking at him now if she was facing him. Coming inside of her was like a whole other world now. The way she’d beg it out of him, to fill her up, God, it was the hottest thing. And she was doing it now.

“Come in me, Juggie please, just-”

“Fuck me till you break me.” Her nails dug into the wood, hard enough to chip it, hard enough to turn her fingers white under the pressure. Her cries grew louder, hearing him groan making her wetter. The rough push and pull of his hips left her shaking, his cold fingers from the icy chill of the bar pressing to her clit, rolling in circles.

“Fuck, c'mon.” He came in her, hard.

Traces of them ran down her leg as she stayed put, bent over the counter and breathing heavily, her face pressed to the hard wood and her lips curved into a devilish smile.

“I love when you do that.” She turns over, leaning against the bar, following his eyes down between her legs. And he can’t help but drop to his knees again.

—–

Wednesday around noon the bell to the White Wyrm chimes, Betty smiles and all, passing Sabrina and walking toward him.

“Juggie!” She grabs him by the lapels of his jacket over the bar. She leans over, her lips pressed to his and her hands on his neck. His eyes are blown wide until her tongue slips in his mouth, letting them flutter closed.

She moans into his mouth, their lips pulling apart with a wet pop. He wipes his mouth with the back of his hand, watching Betty as she drops a bag of Pop’s food on the bar counter. She turns to leave, eyeing Sabrina.

“She might wanna give the bar an extra wipe down, right Jug. First day on the job, yeah?” She looks between them, swinging her coat over her shoulders. Before she disappears behind the bar door she looks to him one more time.

“I’ll be back later on your break Juggie to take you for a ride.” Darkness looks good on her.

“Your girl likes to mark her territory huh?” Sabrina’s eyes narrow at him.

“Bet our sex was better.” She looks over him, eyes filled with humor.

“It’s called being in love.”

“Never felt it before, its new for me. Excuse me if I’m a little infatuated.” He bites back, venomous.

“Ouch.” Sabrina takes the stab to heart. They’d been together for 2 years before they’d broken up, to which was her fault of course. She’s cheated on him, more than once. He’d thought he loved her, at the time. Until he realized what loving someone actually felt like.

“Why are you really here? Riverdale is small but it’s not that small Sabrina.”

“I miss you.”

“That’s great. I don’t care. Leave.” He nods toward the door.

“You’ll come to your senses.”

—–

Later that night, having fucked hours on end they were wrapped in the sheets, high on each other. Betty sat cross legged, sheets bunched around her waist as he lay back, arms crossed behind his head.

“No wonder every girl at the bar wants you.” She admires him, icy blue eyes and dark raven curls.

“Yeah and why is that?” His lips curve into a smile, pulling her by her arm to fall against his chest.

“You’re hot as fuck.”

“Yeah?” He chuckles, his fingertips running across her bare skin.

“It’s bothering you isn’t it?”

“I wanna make a sex tape just so I can tie them down and make them watch it.” Her hands turn to fists. Quickly he pulls at her hands, prying them apart. He laughs at her comment, unable to help himself.

“Why do they want what they can’t have.” She sighs and he laughs at her again, head thrown back in amusement.

“You’re cute when you’re mad.” He pouts, watching as she scrunched her face, frustrated.

“Shut up!” She crossed her arms over her chest, beginning to get more upset.

“Do you want me to make you feel better?”

“You have to snuggle with me before you go to work.” She demanded sweetly, his eyebrows raising as she pulled him on top of her, his arms resting on either side of her, careful not to crush her fragile frame.

“Is that so? Anything else you want, Elizabeth?” He relaxed above her, giving her the weight that made her feel safe. She rolled her eyes for a moment at the call of her name before snapping back into her playful mood.

“I would like a kiss please.” He leaned down, smothering her cheek with his lips, making her burst into a fit of giggles.

“Not there Jug!” She whined, making him grin at her impatience.

“Not there? Where then? Here?” He teased, kissing the tip of her nose, making her groan in a playful frustration.

“No, here.” She pointed her finger to her lips, her eyes swirling with desire for him, and his for her.

“Oh, there.” He acts innocent, pressing his lips to hers, almost instantly getting the taste of her strawberry tongue with growing desperation. His fingers tangle through her hair, tugging gently, lifting her chin up, delving deeper into her mouth.

The sheets fall from her waist as she locks her legs around his waist, the innocent mood slipping away quickly as he presses open mouth kisses down her jaw. Her nails dig into his sides, clawing, scratching as his lips are reaching down to her chest. He’d never spent this much time naked and vulnerable in his life. They were in bed, always. Talking, fucking, eating food, eating each other. He couldn’t imagine going back to life it was the way before. When he wasn’t with her.

“I keep dreaming about you.” She pulls back, eyes on his.

“Yeah? What am I doing?” He already has an idea. Sometimes he’ll wake up, she’ll be sweating, writhing, moaning in her sleep. He’ll touch her till she wakes up, she’ll tell him what she dreamt about, and then he’ll do whatever she dreams of.

“Fucking me, always. It’s all I think about now.”

“Why dream when you can have the real thing?” He kisses her deeply again, pulling back with her lip tucked between his teeth.

“You came in me so many times Jug, I was so full of you.” She whines, her hips rolling toward his.

“Fuck-” He chokes out.

“I love when you come in me Juggie, when you fill me up like you do-”

“It felt so real, the way you were pulsing inside of me, I-God, I’m so wet already Juggie.” He roughly pulls her closer, ready to start all over again.

“I won’t be able to walk tomorrow.” They’d been fucking all night already, she already could feel the ache between her legs, her thighs becoming sore. But, God, she was never not wanting him. He made her sex crazed.

“I’ll carry you around.” He quickly pushes inside of her, already close on all of her words alone. He’s so tired, the push and pull of his hips dragged out slowly. Her hips buck up to his, desperate. Within minutes her words alone have him coming, filling her up.

“How many times have we fucked in the last week?” She tries to catch her breath, wincing as he pulls out of her.

“I lost count after 20.” He rolls onto his back.

“You complaining?”

“Never.” She shakes her head, shuttering at the feeling of traces of him seeping out of between her legs.

“Why are you so addictive?” He’s on side, head propped up on his hand.

Pink sweaters and hair tied back was no longer his vision of Betty Cooper. It was miles of bare, pale skin, curled blonde hair falling around her face, devilish green eyes and the soft sound of her moaning when he came inside of her. Hearing her name brought up the most sinful images in his head. And there was no doubt in his mind that he was going to want her for the rest of his life.

“Can you stay home today.” She curls up next to him, pressing her cheek to his chest.

“Baby-” His fingers pull through her hair, upset knowing he can’t miss a day.

“I have a bad feeling about today.” She whispers against his skin, lips turned down into a pout.

“What do you mean.” He looks into her eyes and she shrugs.

“I don’t know, just a bad feeling.”

—–

Sabrina walks in to the bar, an hour earlier than she’s supposed to. Jughead had still been at home, wrapped in the sheets with his girlfriend. With purpose she walks to the girl behind the bar, taking a seat.

“So!” She folds her hands together, smirking at the young girl.

“I heard Jug likes you.”

“He’s with Betty.” She looks up, shaking her head.

“That possessive little thing? Don’t worry about her. They’re just fucking.” Sabrina leans back in her chair, arms crossed over her chest.

“He told me he was with her.”

“Jug says lots of things.” Sabrina plays it like she knows him, though she never really did.

“I say go for it. Whatever you do don’t give up. Jug loves a girl that doesn’t quit.” She hops off the stool, a sinister smiling curling on her lips.

—–

“Hey-” The girl makes her way behind him as he wipes down the bar, her hands wrapping around to his front.

“What’re you doing?” He turns around, pushing her back by her shoulders, watching as she tries to move her hands to his belt.

“Get the fuck off of me.”

“You know I have a girlfriend right?” He moves to the side, looking at her, her face twisting in confusion.

“I don’t understand, Sabrina said-”

“Sabrina said?” His blood immediately boils.

—–

“Sabrina!” He picks up a glass from the table as she walks in through the bar door. He throws it next to her head, letting it shatter into a million pieces as she quickly jumps out of the way.

“What the fuck are you doing?” She yells, hand over her chest.

“Fuck out of my business you fucking-”

“Wow, calm down. I’m having a little fun.” She puts her hands up in surrender, jumping as the door opens behind her, Betty storming in. Her hair was failing in curls around her face, skirt and one of his t-shirts on, her face red with anger.

“You! You-Oh I’m gonna fucking scratch your little eyes out you fucking piece of-” Jughead is at her side before she has the chance, pulling her back by both of her arms.

“Baby,-” He whispers in her ear, trying to calm her down, but damn, is she strong when she needs to be.

“Oh god, you got yourself a crazy one.” Sabrina’s lips curve into a smile, and Betty tries to lunge at her.

“Crazy? I’m crazy, you better-”

“Im having some fun, Jeez. I put a pebble in your path and you cracked your tiny little skull on it. Get over yourself.” She spits, nodding her head in Betty’s direction.

“Fuck you!” She screams, trying to pull forward, but Jughead holds her in place. He knew if he’d let go she would fucking hurt her, badly.

“No need, Jug’s already done the job. Many times, remember Juggie?” Sabrina smiles and that’s when he loses it, letting Betty go.

“Knock her out Betts.” She lunges forward, her fist slamming into Sabrina’s jaw.

“You crazy bitch.” Sabrina spits blood, holding her jaw as Betty steps back, locking her fingers with Jughead’s.

“Get the fuck out of my town.” Betty looks over her one more time before pulling her boyfriend out the door.

[cosmicmadwoman]

Adam and Eve Chapter Four: A Whole Other Slice of Pie

Summary: Betty and Jughead have a revelation, the gang attends Fred’s funeral and Jughead spends the night with his foster family.

Prologue Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3

Rating: M

Word Count: 5063

PS: thank you so much to all who is reading! it means so much. There is no greater joy than seeing feedback and hearts for my work! Please feel free to message me if you have any comments or ideas I would so love to hear them :) Plus, here is the link to Adam and Eve on AO3: http://archiveofourown.org/works/11360046/chapters/25427913

“Over my dead body is a Blossom sleeping my house! And that’s final!” Alice Cooper bellowed over the begging of her eldest daughter, Polly.

“Mom! Can you not say dead body?”  Polly whined having an inclination to put her fingers in her ears like when she was a little girl. Her mother made her feel so small and insignificant whenever she spoke to her. Not only insignificant, but crazy. Alice Cooper was the gaslighting queen.

Betty popped up from the couch where she was sitting silently while her sister and mother argued, “Actually, all of us but you mom are Blossoms.”

“Elizabeth Cooper if you’re going to give me attitude you’re going up to your room and not coming out, even to see Jughat,” Alice sneered.

“It’s Jughead,” Betty repressed rolling her eyes to not further press her mother.

“Yeah, yeah, him,” Alice scooted her off with a wave of her hand. It felt to Betty that she messed up her boyfriend’s name on purpose just to be belittling. Alice Cooper was also the belittling queen. Betty understood her mother a little more after learning how her father betrayed her as a young woman, ripping her own lifeblood away from her. How could you recover from that? And why did she marry him? In Riverdale, it seemed that the adults had their own way of operating that was ornate and unnecessary. They were always saying, you’ll understand what we do when you’re older. All they do was suffer.

“Just Cheryl, Mom,” Polly pressed.

“You already said that and no, it does not make a difference,” Alice was relentless in her denial and when Alice walked away into the kitchen, Polly knew the conversation was over. She made a loud angry sigh hoping to catch Alice’s attention, but she was over her daughter’s whining as much as she was over everything else.

“She is unbelievable!” Polly dropped herself onto the couch next to Betty, throwing her hands in the air for good measure. Betty was slightly perturbed by Polly’s childish behavior, acting like throwing a tantrum and having a fit would someone how fix all of the rotten things in their lives and in this town. “Cheryl is the aunt of her grandchildren. She could have some sympathy.”

Betty tried not to snort at her sister’s words. Before Sisters of Quiet Mercy, that used to be her. Completely self-centered and selfish. There were countless times Polly had bailed on her to go out with boys and left Betty to cover for her and endure her mother’s wrath alone. Betty still had a piece of resentment left in her for all the times Polly got to lash out and rebel, just to have Betty take the brunt of it because she was the only there. Hopefully when Polly’s kids came she could give all to her kids and protect them like Betty felt Polly didn’t do for her.

“I would say, before poking the beast more, ask Cheryl if she would even stay here,” Betty advised.

“She will,” Polly responded firmly.

The girls both jumped slightly to hearing a fist on the door. Just thinking about the Cheryl Blossom shacking up down the hall from her was enough to fuel nightmares. Betty walked to the door not knowing what to expect, but hoping for Jughead. In reality it had probably only been 30 minutes since they last saw each other, but it seemed like an eternity. He was the only one who understood her anymore. Everyone else felt alien to her.

Instead, she opened the door to find Archie. His fists were tightly clenched like hers have been so many times before. She took his hand gingerly so he would not hurt himself. His eyes and cheeks were raw with tears. Betty feared the worst. She knew Fred Andrews was gone. She saw that same look on her sister’s face when she learned the father of her children was killed. Betty pulled Archie into a hug as he began to wail. Betty cried as well, both of their shirts beginning to show evidence of tear stricken times. Fred was the last good, honest man left in Riverdale. He wasn’t a sellout or a conman, and if Betty knew anything, she knew that was what killed him. The good only suffocate in Riverdale.

Betty felt Polly come up behind them and place a hand on each other their shoulders, her own tears mussing up her light makeup.

“Death is such a terrible thing,” Polly whispered.

Archie stepped back but still held onto Betty’s hands. She tried to curl her fingers over her palm in a certain way so he could feel her fresh wounds. He didn’t notice.

“I told Jughead too,” Archie said quietly. “Veronica is coming over with casserole from her mom so I’ll tell her then.”

“Your mom is here, right? Is she going to make you move to Chicago now?” Betty asked, her green eyes brimming with concern.

“I can’t think about that right now, Betty.”

“Of course. I’m sorry.”

“I should go. I’ll let you know when the funeral is,” Archie seemed to have some trouble letting go of her hands, but he did and closed the door gingerly on his way out.

The house was silent for a moment. Before Polly spoke, “Who is next?”

“Hopefully no one,” Betty murmured. But she knew at this rate there would be no such luck.

Alice came barreling into the room shortly after Archie left demanding to know who was at the door and why.  

“Fred Andrews is dead,” Betty’s voice cracked with tears that threatened to fall, but her stone facade would not crack in front of her mother.

“Wow,” her mother exclaimed with as much emotion as she was capable of. “Better call Hal and tell him.”

Alice went over to her girls have them brief hugs. Betty felt surprisingly comforted by the small gesture. Her mother hand a heart somewhere in there. It most likely due to her husband that it had been so constantly snuffed out. The more Betty learned about her father the more she saw him as a perpetrator and her mother as a survivor. Alice’s hard demeanor was not built on arrogance but disappointment. She gave her daughters a curt smile and retreated to the den, probably to call their father. The Cooper family was amongst the first to know, but before long the town buzzed with the news.

Betty felt a phone vibrate lightly in her pocket. She pulled out as she watched her sister waddle up the stairs. She wondered if she was going to take her advice and call Cheryl. Reaching for her phone she read:

J: You know?

B: Yeah

J: We really need to talk

B: Is everything ok?

J: I’m not sure....

B: Well obviously nothing is ok but you know what I mean

J: I’ll be through your window in two minutes

Betty smirked at her boyfriend’s weird habit of coming through the window. Everyone knew they were together, he could easily go through the front door, but Jughead thought it created this alternate reality where only the two of them knew they were together. The blonde’s ponytail bounced as she bounded up the stairs just as her tall, dark and handsome boy climbed through her pastel pink curtains. He was darkness moving into her light and it was like a fairytale.

He hugged her immediately as he climbed in and she could feel his chest heaving up and down at the workout. The clung to each other for while, his hands messing up her hair as he threaded it through her hair.

“I love you,” Jughead murmured into her hair. “I’ll never get sick of saying that.”

“And I’ll never get sick of hearing it,” Betty giggled in spite of all the things going wrong in their lives.

Jughead pulled back and led her to her bed and they sat down cross legged and facing each other.

“Archie asked me to kill whoever killed Mr. Andrews,” Jughead divulged.

Betty’s eyes widened and her mouth hung open. She was unable to speak and waited for Jughead to continue or give some explanation. This was so unlike Archie, he was ever the optimist, but then again his father was just killed. But to ask Jughead insinuated that Archie thought he could do it.

“He’s my best friend but I don’t know if I could do that to anyone, Betts. Being a Southside Serpent is one thing, but murder is a whole other slice of pie,” Jughead said.

“Only you would use food analogies in a time like this,” Betty observed trying to lighten the mood a bit.

Jughead ignored her though, “Do you think I could?”

“Why are you asking me?” Betty paused as Jughead looked at her expectedly. “Is it because you’re afraid that could?”

Something coiled in Jughead’s stomach and he wanted to vomit. He hadn’t realized why he had asked her until now. He was looking for validation that he wasn’t that man, not that kind of guy; he wasn’t Clifford Blossom who killed his son for knowing to much, or his father who treated cleaning up a teenager’s dead body like a construction job. But maybe he was. There was a different between him and Clifford Blossom, it was a slight difference but he clung to it; he couldn’t kill an innocent person, that much he knew. Could Betty love him knowing what darkness he was really capable of? Losing her scared him more than literally anything he could fathom.

He still had not answered her question, but Betty didn’t seem worried about it. A burning sensation boiled up inside him, he needed her right now like it was the last time he could ever touch her. If he loved her he wouldn’t drag her down like this. And God, did he love her so fucking much.

Jughead reached for her sitting up from his cross legged position and delivering a crushing kiss to her elegant mouth. He pushed down onto her until he was laying on top of her on the bed. She kissed him back as best she could, but his hungry, sloppy kisses dominated her mouth leaving her no choice but to let him master the kiss. His hands were frantically wandering her sides and slid up under her shirt to feel her soft skin. Betty preferred not to just be a receiver but a giver as well, and began to buck her hips up to evoke hardness form his length. She could feel his manhood pressing into her through their tight jeans, so she deftly moved her hands to release him and he let out a moan in thanks. The cool air was lapping at her skin now as he pulled the shirt off and tossed it on the ground beside them. Betty pulled at his hunter green tshirt and rolled it off of him to join hers on the floor. Jughead wasted no time removing the bra cup from her right nipple and sucking roughly on the tender peak. Betty had to slap her hand over her mouth to not bring attention to their teenage debauchery. Jughead swirled the pink muscle around the nipple then nibbled gently, causing a delicious pain that he immediately soothed away with his tongue.

Betty reached around her and unclipped her pink bra to give her boyfriend better access and view of her naked breasts. He sighed into her chest before kissing down to her stomach and dipping into her navel as he unbuttoned her jeans and nipped at her underwear line. Betty grabbed Jughead’s head and pulled him up to her mouth for a searing kiss. Betty used the distraction to push his pants and boxers down with her feet and reached for his naked member and squeezed the head. Jughead let out a low groan into Betty’s mouth and she smiled into their wet and passionate kiss. Betty pushed Jughead onto his side as she kissed her way down his lips to his toned chest and eventually reaching the edge of coarse black hairs lining the area around his pulsing heat. Betty kissed the top of the head and did one stroke down with her mouth before Jughead stopped her with his hand in her loose ponytail.

“No,” was all he said.

Betty looked up at him curiously. Was he upset with her? Was she doing something wrong? She had only ever done this once before and it was with him, so she couldn’t say she was a blow job expert. She was disappointed in herself that she couldn’t please him like she so desperately craved to do. She wanted to dominate his pleasure and be the only one to leave him squirming. But instead, she looked up at him and only saw sadness. She moved off from him and awkwardly layed beside him.

“Am I really that repulsive?” Betty asked tentatively. She felt like she was going to cry and it was so embarrassing.

Jughead shot up immediately and kissed her cheek and all over her face whispering “No, no, no, no, no, no, no, I love you.”

Betty shrugged him off with her shoulder and Jughead felt so frustrated with himself. Why did he have to feel like this? Why couldn’t he just enjoy this amazing girl in front of him, practically begging to touch him?

“Then what?” Betty pressed.

“I don’t deserve it,” Jughead said quietly. “I’m not a good person, Betts. I’m scared of myself.”

Betty realized that she got the answer to her previous question. He was afraid of what he could do. She was ashamed in how much it thrilled her. She fantasized about his strong forearm clenching the trigger of a gun, his nostril flared and jaw tight, defending the ones he loved. She imagined making love to him on the couch of his trailer while bullets fly in through the rusty metal, sun shining through the holes but not penetrating the lovers. They are invincible in her fantasy. They could conquer the world. There was something seriously wrong with her.

“I’m not scared of you,” Betty drawled.

“You should be,” Jughead’s voice was gruff and full of unbridled lust as he rolled on top of her.

Betty’s core was so ready for him just by looking at the dark and stormy waters of his blue eyes. The tip of his member was teasing at her entrance and she could see the strain on his face to keep him from plunging into her depths. He was waiting for something.

“I’m not scared of you, Juggie, because I’m just like you,” Betty said to the man laying on top of her.

At her words he broke through and entered her, both groaning in relief, like being connected was their natural state and every moment Jughead wasn’t buried inside her was all wrong. They were molded together in more than just a physical way. There minds were connected-- they became one that day, giving into the darkness in their beings.

Jughead erratic hip movements caused him to reach the hilt in Betty. She screamed out and Jughead clamped his hand over her mouth. She had to bite him to keep her muffled screams from ringing through the house and he could feel himself bleed from her teeth. Betty tasted the coppery tang of his blood in her mouth and came at the eroticsm of being bad. Jughead released into her a few pumps after and they stayed enveloped in one another for a long time after, just listening to each other breathing.

“I don’t remember who I was before you,” Betty began to cry and she didn’t know why.

Jughead rolled off of her and cuddled his hard body against her. She wrapped her arm around him as he nestled into her chest.

“I love you,” was Jughead’s reply as he kissed away her tears.

------

The funeral was the weekend after on a gray December morning. The flakes were landing on the windows of the church, forming beautiful crystalized decorations. The site was warm with red candles, but to Jughead and Betty there was still an ominous chill. The chill of a town that knew a lot more than they were saying not out of spite, but fear. The couple sat upfront with Veronica, Archie, Mary and Nana Andrews. Both of Fred’s parents has passed away when he was young, so Mary’s mother was always a strong mother figure to him. The wrinkly little woman was a complete wreck as Mary held her shaking from in her arms.

Archie held Veronica’s hand unbelievably tight. So much so that her hand matched the red acrylic nails glued to her nails. The minister's words fell on deaf ears as the whole town worried about their own fates. Nothing was predictable like it used to be in Riverdale. Jughead sat idly wondering which Riverdale was better, the Riverdale pre-July 4th where the darkness simmered underneath the the town’s soil like an eternal fire brewing, the flames licking the feets of only the corrupt, or, the post-July 4th Riverdale, where it was revealed the flames were not only smouldering under the soil, but burning within all of the townspeople of Riverdale. He couldn’t choose.

Nana Andrews, Mary and Archie all had nice things to say about Fred, how hardworking he was, how he built his company from the ground with determination and how he was a great husband, son and son-in-law. It all seemed fake to him. Mary left her husband, Archie was getting in more arguments with his dad than ever and Nana Andrews hadn’t visited in months. It felt like a distraction from the reality of death;  the darkness, the nothingness. Death was permanent and memories were temporary. A thought of Betty dying crept into his brain which he quickly swatted away. That wouldn’t happen as long as he was alive. He would have to die first. There was no compromise in that. Maybe that’s why men typically died before their female partners. Women are stronger and can face the world alone like a man can’t.

The procession was unable to go the grave site because the ground was too frozen. It was gruesome and the guests weren’t aware, but Fred’s body was being kept in a freezer at the morgue in the hospital until the ground thawed. The cost of burying in the winter was too high for the meager wages Andrews’ construction made, and Mary knew Fred would want enough money as possible to be saved to keep for Archie’s needs. A few people knew where Fred’s body was kept though, including Sheriff Keller. He had planned to inspect the body properly once the funeral end out of respect for the family. Jughead, Betty and Veronica also knew, as they heard Archie rant a yesterday about how inhumane the placement was. One other person knew too.

The reception was held at Archie’s place and died down quickly. The foursome found themselves in Archie’s room, all sitting around the floor in their black clothing, both Jughead and Archie in a black suit and tie, Veronica is a floor length chiffon number, and Betty in a tight ribbed long sleeved dress that reached her knees. Betty noticed Jughead wore the same suit he wore to Jason’s funeral, the same suit that made her begin to see the raven haired boy in a different light. Now she just wanted to rip him out of it. They had smuggled up a bottle of nice vodka a guest brought for mixed drinks and were passing it amongst them drowning in sadness and liquor. Jughead opted not to drink seeing what it did to his father whilst growing up, but he didn’t stop Archie and the ladies from indulging a bit.

“He’s not here to tell me to stop drinking,” Archie said lamely as he undid his tie and few of the top buttons on his shirt.

Jughead shifted uncomfortably in his spot on the floor. He wish Archie didn’t have to do that. He should feel confident in his and Betty’s relationship after all they’ve been through and done together, but still, he feared the charm of the Andrews’ pectoral muscles and abs. Betty didn’t seem to notice because she layed her head on Jughead’s lap. He could tell she was a little drunk by the glazed look in her eye and the exaggerated PDA she wasn’t fond of normally. Jughead’s heart stirred and he began to stroke her hair that she let fall down in curls today for a change.

“I’m sorry, Archie,” Veronica eventually said, grabbing his hand. There wasn’t really much else to say than that.

“I know,” Archie sighed, “Just you guys being here is nice. Thank you.”

“Of course. You’re our friend,” Betty said in her angelic voice.

“I hate to do this, but I have to leave by 6. My foster family set up dinner for me tonight,” Jughead spoke up.

Betty sat up and eyed him. Her green eyes were vibrating with frustration. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I just--” Jughead began before his girlfriend cut him off.

“I told you I wanted to meet them!”

“I thought it was more important for you to be here with Archie,” Jughead tried to reason.

“I decide what’s important to me, not you,” Betty said with narrowed eyes.

“Should we leave?” Archie motioned to himself and Veronica. The tone of his voice was clearly showing annoyance. This wasn’t a place for a lover’s quarrel. Especially two lovers he didn’t particularly care to see together. Not that he would reveal that to anyone.

“Sorry Archie, I shouldn’t be making this about something else. Would you mind if I went too to meet Jughead’s foster family?”  Betty turned to him with pleading.

He couldn’t help the subtle rage developing in the pit of his stomach. He was so used to coming first for Betty. Veronica was his girlfriend and yes, he could manage without Betty, but he didn’t want to. He shouldn’t have to. Things changed too drastically too quickly when she fell for his friend Jughead and everything has been such a whirlwind Arvhie felt like he didn’t have time to adjust. His father had just died. It wouldn't be selfish of him to tell Betty to stay. Besides, she was drunk and shouldn’t meet the foster parents like that. Really, he was saving her.

“Can you please say, Betty? For me?” Archie’s pleading eyes gave Betty not much of a choice.

Betty gave a side eyed glance towards Jughead, telling him a mixture of I’m sorry, I have to do this, I love you and fuck you for not telling me rolled into one.

“Yes. I’ll stay,” Betty conceded.

There was a palpable tension in the room, almost like no one got what they wanted but Archie. He had his two best girls at his side, Jughead felt jaded having Archie picked over him, as always, even though he didn’t ask Betty to come in the first place and Veronica wondered why she wasn’t good enough to console her boyfriend solo. Betty took another swig from the bottle and shook her head with pursed lips.

“Give me some,” Veronica grabbed the bottle from her and took a swig, reacting the same as the blonde.

“Easy, girls,” Archie chuckled.

Both women shot him a look and scooted closer to each other so they could pass the bottle easier between them.

“I should get going,” Jughead said, standing up and brushing himself off.

“Why? It’s only 4:30,” Betty said,

“I just want to be by myself a bit before I have to socialize again, you know me,” Jughead gave a quick kiss on the lips to Betty, which tasted like top-shelf alcohol and he took a quick swipe of his lips with his tongue to taste the elixir of alcohol mixed with pure Betty. She would be the death of him. She smirked knowingly like she knew exactly what she did to him. It took every ounce of power in his body to pull away and not make a show.

“Later, Veronica. Call me if you need anything, Arch,” Jughead waved as he left the cramped bedroom he used to call home.

“He adores you,” Veronica slurred as she hugged Betty desperately, “It’s so lovely.”

“I adore him too!” Betty giggled like it was some big secret, “I’ve never met anyone like him. Like, I’ve known him all of my life, but I feel like just now I’m really starting to get to know him. He’s electrifying.”

“That’s quite the adjective,” Archie grumbled under his breath. Jughead wasn’t even there and he still held Betty’s attention.

“What’s he like in bed?”

“Veronica!” Archie scolded.

“What? I’m sure you’re curious too. When I first met little Holden Caulfield I could not see him getting it on. Could you?” Veronica leaned into Archie purring as she settled into his lap.

“I guess you’re right,” Archie shrugged as he began to toy with a loose string on Veronica’s side zipper.

“Exactly. Share the dirty secrets, Cooper. I want to know every scandalous detail,” Veronica said in her flawless New York style.

“I don’t really have anything to compare it to,” Betty shrugged. “But sex with Jughead is always amazing because of how connected we are.”

“You let Jughead be your first?” Archie questioned.

“I didn’t ‘let’ him. It was a two-way thing. I wanted it too,” Betty suddenly felt uncomfortable with the way Archie questioned her. “Let’s talk about something else.”

The kids drank into the night talking about this and that. Archie broke down crying a few times, to be expected, but Veronica and Betty were there to pat his back and give him kind words. Mary kicked the girls out at 10:30. Smithers came to pick up Ronnie and Betty was expected to walk home to her house next door, but her blood felt like fire and she wanted to go anywhere but home. She sat at her front steps and dialed her favorite number.

“Hey Juggie baby,” Betty tried to whisper sexily into the phone but it sounded more like sad slurring.

She heard the husky laugh of her boyfriend on the other line, “You’re drunk, Elizabeth Cooper.”

“You sound like Alice. Where are you?”

“I’m in bed at my foster family’s house. I promised I would stay a few nights with them so they can make sure I’m being good,” Jughead said.

“Aw,” Betty whined, “But Juggie, I want you to make love to me.”

“Not while you’re drunk. It’s not right.”

“Then let me crawl into bed with you,” Betty offered.

“I share a room with their son.”

“Ugh, why is everything so impossible,” Betty groaned, partly at her inability to be with Jughead and the strappy boots that she couldn’t rebuckle.

“You’re being dramatic.”

“Where do the Carters live?” Betty asked, the question appearing to be innocent.

“The are the first red house on the left once you enter the Southside. I’m sleeping in the back room. Why?”

“See you soon,” Betty laughed as she hung up the phone.

“Betty!’ Jughead yelled into his phone but she was already gone.

“Who was that?” The lump of green blanket on the bed from across the room asked.

“My girlfriend Betty,” was all the information Jughead was going to offer.

Jughead was used to sharing a room. He shared one with Jellybean for 10 years. She even used to sing in her sleep and Jughead would wake up with little songs she made about fairies and princesses stuck in his head. But that was different, she was blood, and this kid he had just meet once before today. Natasha and Rick Carter, his foster parents, fostered many kids and had one of their own. Rick Jr, or RJ, was a kid his age that he would have to share a room with. The other two rooms were in the house was for his parents and the other had all the foster girls they were taking care of at the moment; Lily, 10, Brittany, 8, and Ginger was 4. RJ said he has shared his room with plenty of kids and it wasn’t an intrusion. He was raised on ‘me casa you casa’ as he called it. Still, it was really weird. He’s grateful there are people in the world that are so welcoming and he felt bad for taking them for granted.

RJ turned on his side and looked over at Jughead. Was he expecting some kind of late night bro chat? RJ didn’t seem like a bro, just another regular kid from the Southside. He had his dad’s hand-me-down clothes and not much to his name. He had blonde hair in a short crew cut and a scar that cut through his eyebrow.

“She go to Riverdale High?” RJ asked.

“Uh, yeah,” Jughead answered.

“Sucks you have to switch schools,” RJ said.

“I can handle it.”

“I’m not popular or anything, but I can help not get the shit kicked out of you,” RJ offered sincerely. It didn’t sound like an insult, but more like a fact of Southside High.

“Thanks, man,” Jughead nodded.

Just then, the rickety and unsecure window of the boys’ bedroom opened, letting in a storm of cold air, little snowflakes and Betty. Luckily Jughead’s bed was perched against the wall next to the window because Betty flopped onto his bed head first. She giggled uncontrollably and slid her cold body under the covers.

“I’m guessing this is Betty?” RJ asked.

“Yes, this is Betty,” Jughead responded. He turned his attention to his shivering girlfriend, “You can’t stay, as much as I would like you to. I don't want to get in trouble my first night here.”

“I’ll be out by dawn,” Betty said, already drifting to sleep against the warmth of Jughead.

“She can stay. I can cover for you if I have to,” RJ offered.

Jughead gave him an appreciative smile, “Thanks man. You’re awesome.”

RJ smiled brightly and snuggled back into bed. He seemed to Jughead like one of those guys who just wanted to fit in and have people like him.

“You made it here on foot pretty fast,”  Jughead said to Betty.

“I’m drunk. I couldn’t feel my legs.”

[seth-kate]

- haunted by the ghost of you

request: could you write one where the reader is a Blossom and they get torn apart because of wat happened in episode 12? 

a/n: so it just so happened that I was listening to The Night We Met by Lord Huron while I opened this ask and BAM instant idea popped into my head! Also last nights episode really hit me, so this WILL CONTAIN SPOILERS.  

It’s odd being in a place that is so familiar yet so detached at the same time. It feels almost like you are disembodied from something once so stable and often encountered. The setting remains the same but the people and the stories are woven with new threads while barely clinging to the old. 

It felt strange to be in Riverdale after so many years. 

To many passers by the sudden reappearance of the youngest Blossom child seemed highly alarming and unnerving. It felt almost as if time had slipped away and reversed to the past, a past where her image along with her twin siblings seemed permanent. She had seemed like a character in a novel that had been abandoned halfway through; only to be picked up again weeks later. Frozen in a state of unknowing by so many and now was back animate and lively, as if she had never disappeared from Riverdale so many years before. 

She was however, alone, and no other Blossom was staying within the confines of the town her family had once dominated. She tried to keep her head down as she made her way through the quiet suburban area in case anyone decided to stop her and ask how she was doing after all these years. Her efforts to go unnoticed however were in vain. The red sweeping curls that were so like Cheryl’s gave her away, the Blossom trademark too bold to hide. 

People stared as she made her way by. People like Fred Andrews who was out walking his dog that seemed ancient by now, it was odd for him to stare since he’d known she was coming. Maybe he wasn’t expecting her so soon. 

A small house, that had resided down the lane from the Andrews and the Coopers, lived in for years by an elderly couple, was now her end goal on her long walk. Nostalgia washed over her like a heat wave as she passed by Betty’s house, remembering all the late night sleepovers they used to have. 

The house sprung up in her vision as she rounded the corner, hidden behind a cherry blossom and a white picket fence. The house itself was the same color as the tree, just as ethereal and pleasant. The garden was trim and unblemished and the white shutters on the houses windows gleamed in the sunshine. In more ways than one y/n guessed that it was perfect for the couple who lived there now. 

She stood by the gate for a while, a smile playing on her lips and her heart thumping in her chest as she thought of finally seeing the people behind those doors in person, after so long. The excited tremors deep inside made her swiftly push open the gate. But before she could get halfway up the small walkway; the front door had been swung open and there stood the widest eyed and most wholesome blonde she’d ever encountered. 

“Y/N!” 

“Betty!” 

The former River Vixens threw their arms around each other and embraced like personal space did not exist. Lungs and ribs were crushed but neither girl cared at all. They stood there in each others arms for what felt like hours. 

“Is that y/n I hear?” came the undeniable voice of Archie Andrews. Betty let her go as Archie came running down the porch, a goofy smile on his face and his arms open wide. 

It was hard, even after all these years how much he reminded her of the brother she lost. Of Jason. Same red hair, same wide smiles and love for football. Her throat tightened but she let him take her into a hug all the same. 

“Hey Archie!” y/n hugged back, squeezing him so tight that she was sure he’d be bruised. 

“I think I’m going to cry” Betty laughed while wiping tears from her eyes, those wide glistening spheres still staring into the Blossom girls face. She took Betty’s hand and gave it a squeeze. Archie comically rolled his eyes. 

“How long has it been since you’ve last seen each other?” he asked with an eyebrow raise, the scar in the middle of his brow deepening even more. 

“Eleven months, and it’s been two days since our last Skype call” y/n told him, grinning as Betty hugged her tightly again. 

It was true that the youngest Blossom had tried to avoid all things associated with Riverdale for a long time, but Betty Cooper hadn’t been so easy to forget about. She’d often visited New York, once spending a Christmas there while both women had been single and alone for the holidays. 

Her mother and Cheryl had almost left too easily. Maybe it was because Jason’s killer had been someone who they had loved and trusted. Someone who they thought they could be safe around. Being in this town and seeing how people looked at them afterwards had almost driven the Blossoms to madness, and had caused Penelope and her daughters to flee without a word. 

The blossom tree seemed to whisper to her as it blew in the breeze; calling her name like it haunted her. It was like those whispers spoke her secrets, those dark secrets shrouded in pain that she had buried within. This town was awakening the past, and she didn’t like it. Betty ushered her inside with the promise of tea, and they made their way towards the house; leaving the ghosts to linger. 

“Betty!” y/n gasped, one hand holding a warm mug of tea while the other now moved forward to caress the white billowing fabric of the dress Betty held up “it’s gorgeous. You’re going to be the most beautiful bride” 

Betty flushed a lovely pink, her light eyes sparkling in a way that made y/n believe that Archie probably hadn’t been able to wait until he proposed to her. It had been quick, but right and fitting and everyone knew Archie and Betty were meant to be together. Nothing but their wedding could have drawn a Blossom back to Riverdale. 

“Wait until you see the dress I got for you” the blonde bride to be walked back towards the closet of her and Archie’s shared bedroom with a smile “if it doesn’t fit we can do a few alterations but” she added with a flourish as she pulled a gathering of fabric in her arms “I think it will be perfect” 

It hung from the hanger like a graceful waterfall of soft chiffon, the color pretty and perfect for Betty’s spring theme. Y/n smiled wide, placing her mug on Betty’s dresser and walking towards her beaming best friend. 

“It’s blossom pink, of course. I thought it’d be perfect for my maid of honor” she said “and we’ll be carrying cherry blossoms in our bouquets, because despite what happened in the past…I want to acknowledge my Blossom heritage” 

“Oh Betty….” y/n sighed, putting her arms around her and giving her a soft squeeze “I think that’s a wonderful idea, what happened in the past needs to be healed. We can do that”

“So you like the dress?” Betty smiled a watery smile, tears brimming in her big eyes. 

“I love the dress!” y/n exclaimed “I just can’t wait to see my best friend married” 

“I still can’t believe it either, I mean I’m getting married in two days!” she squealed excitedly. 

“How did your mom and dad take it when you told them?” y/n asked, hanging the blossom pink dress back in the closet with a fond last look. 

“Gave me the whole speech about us being too young. How a couple of twenty two year olds weren’t responsible enough to get married” Betty rolled her eyes as she sat herself on the end of her bed “but Archie and I have gone through a lot in the past, and we really are in love y/n. So why wait?” 

The red head took up her mug again, her hands clasping around the fading heated porcelain and took a deep breath at the words in love. She hadn’t thought about being in love in a long time. Once, long ago, this town had held the promise of a forever. A type of forever that her friend now had instead. 

“Speaking of the past…..” Betty eluded, patting the bed beside her “we need to talk about yours. Specifically yours and Jugs” 

“Betty….” y/n warned, her tone trying its best to come across as stern but it wavered in the middle. She held eye contact with her as she walked across the room and sat herself on the blue covers of the bed. 

“I’m serious y/n, Jughead will be at our wedding. I just want to know that you’ll be okay being around him after all this time”  

“I didn’t really think about him being there” that was a lie, and it sounded like one the minute it left her mouth. Betty didn’t seem convinced, she raised an eyebrow so high it created a crease in her forehead. 

“He’s basically like the only brother Archie will ever have. Did you think he wouldn’t be invited? He’s the best man, and you’re the maid of honor” Betty told her “how do you feel about that?” 

“I don’t want to see him, Betty” y/n sighed “I don’t want to have to face him after what I done, after how my family tore us apart. I can’t look into his eyes and fall in love all over again and know that all he sees is hate. He must hate me Betty” 

“He doesn’t talk about it. Ever. Not even with Archie, not after these five years. But I can tell that he doesn’t hate you. I don’t think he could ever hate you” her eyes held sincerity but doubt clouded y/ns mind. She was a Blossom; hating her and anything to do with her family was almost an automatic response among the locals of Riverdale. 

“It haunts me everyday what happened, and I’ve left a lot of things behind me that I wish I hadn’t and it hurts. I left my brother behind in the ground, I never got to see my father being buried even though he was a murderer. This place, this town has haunted my every move for five years, but nothing hurts me more than what happened with me and Jughead” y/n felt the tears pricking her eyes, but she held them back. 

Betty sat beside her, a hand clasped warmly over hers as the two girls sat and remembered what happened five years earlier. 

Drowning was pleasant. It was sweet to lie below the water as the waves crashed above. Watching destruction unfold while numbness took over was peaceful in a painful way. 

Cheryl hadn’t stopped crying, her small frame shaking as the tears flowed from her big brown eyes. She was curled up on the uncomfortable bench in the police station, one of y/ns arms wrapped around her. She just lay like a child against her sister, both of them wrapped up together; all pale limbs, crying eyes and red hair. 

While Cheryl was all emotion, y/n felt nothing but an aching hole inside her that was bottomless. The arms that were around her sister didn’t even try to comfort, they just lay there like dead weights. But somehow Cheryl felt safe where she was because she had stayed like that for the past day. 

Their brother was dead, murdered by their own father and now that father was dead too. His life had been taken by his own hand because of guilt and the fact that he knew he had been caught, by a bunch of sleuthing teenagers. Now their mother was being detained and questioned in association, even though the Blossom girls knew she had nothing to do with it. The pain in her face when she had been told it was Clifford was too genuine to stage. She too, was dead inside. 

The one person who wouldn’t leave y/ns head was Jughead. She hadn’t spoken to him properly since the dance, when he had thought that she had known that Archie, Betty and Veronica were going to break into his fathers trailer. They had fought before but this time was different. FP had been arrested and accused of her brothers murder, even though he clearly hadn’t done it. He was now locked in a cell in this very jail. 

“When do you think mommy can be let go?” Cheryl asked in her soft voice, her eyes leaking uncontrollably with mascara infused tears. 

“I don’t know Cheryl, another few hours maybe” y/n sighed, her voice hollow and empty. 

“Then we can leave?” her sister asked her. Y/n looked down at her, into her brown eyes and thought about the pain that was going to be felt when she spoke her next words. 

“Then we can leave. Forever” somehow, it didn’t hurt at all. 

Right this moment; housekeepers at Thornhill were packing everything the remaining Blossoms owned. They would soon be gone, and so would the image of this place. This cursed town. 

“I’m sorry…..for slapping Jughead” Cheryl almost whispered “I shouldn’t have done that” 

“It’s okay Cheryl. you were upset and didn’t know that it was…..” 

“Our father who really killed Jason?” Cheryl finished when y/n couldn’t. 

“Jesus we’re so messed up, aren’t we?” y/n ran a shaking hand through her long red hair, the very thing that reminded her of exactly who she was “the sooner we leave this place the better” 

Anything Cheryl was about to say was cut short by the interrogation room door opening, and the bustling click of heels as Penelope Blossom was ushered out of the room. The girls snapped their heads up to see their mom being lead out by Sheriff Keller. She wasn’t in handcuffs. 

“Mom!” y/n exclaimed, jumping up from her seat on the bench. Her limbs and joints ached from being in the same position for so long. 

“Girls, we’re leaving. Now” she said, taking y/ns hand and pulling her towards the door. Sheriff Keller stood by watching the exchange with a sorrowful look, not one of a man who expected Mrs Blossom of murdering her own son. 

“Where are we going?” Cheryl asked breathlessly, desperately trying to clutch y/ns hand as they were pulled out of the police station. 

“New York” their mother told them “to our winter condo, just for a short time while this all blows over” 

“Blows over? This will never blow over mom” Cheryl said breathlessly as they stepped outside into the night. A car was already waiting for them, its headlights like the bright glow of an interrogation lamp. Y/n shut her eyes at the thought. 

“Then we don’t come back, we leave this place behind us, and everyone in it” 

She swung open the doors of the car- the Blossom chauffeur sitting behind the wheel- and gave the girls a desperate look. Something inside the youngest Blossom churned at the reality of her situation. 

Her father was really dead. He really had killed Jason. And she would really be leaving behind the love of her life; Jughead. 

All of a sudden she didn’t feel numb anymore, but felt everything all at once. 

“Y/N!” a shout rang out through the parking lot. It made all three Blossom women snap their heads around, but y/n already knew who it was. 

Jughead was sprinting through the parking lot, a frantic look on his face as he was followed close behind by Betty, Veronica and Archie. 

“Say your goodbyes, but make it quick” her mother warned her with a stern look, then taking Cheryl’s arm and pulling her into the car. 

“Y/n!” Jughead said again as he got closer, his breath rapid and harsh. He had clearly ran all the way here. She couldn’t look at him, couldn’t face the fact she was doing this. 

His hands grabbed her arms, shaking her a little so she would look at him. She regretted when she did, he was so pale and his eyes were red. His face was full of pain, most of it caused by her family. 

“You can’t be doing this” he said to her, his eyes searching her face and his hands tightening their hold on her arms “you’re not seriously leaving” 

“I’m sorry, Juggie” she whispered, watching as his face contorted like someone had just ripped his heart out. 

“No…..you’re not. You’re not leaving, I won’t let you leave!” he said frantically, tears welling in his eyes and threatening to spill over. 

“It’s for the best” y/n told him, her eyes looking towards her friends that stood in the background. Archie was practically squeezing Betty’s hand to death for comfort while she leaned on him for support. Veronica watched on with crying eyes. 

“For the best?” Jughead repeated, dropping his hands from her body “you think running away from your problems is for the best!” 

“I’m the one running away? That’s what you’re good at Juggie! You always run away from your problems, now I’m the one doing it for a change” y/n told him, furiously wiping a tear away. 

“But I always run away to you” his voice was a whisper, his beautiful face a canvas of torture “I want you to be with me now, we need one another” 

“My father murdered my brother!” she shouted, hating how he winced when she did “my own brother Jughead, do you think I want to stay here and face that everyday? Do you think I want to be here when -” 

Her sobs were muffled by his chest as he pulled her close, letting her horrific cries soak into his jacket. His arms wrapped around her while his soft lips pressed into her hair. He was holding her tight but he knew she was slipping away. 

“Stay with me” he asked her, words leaving him but wavering in the nights breeze “please don’t go. I have nobody left” 

“I’m a Blossom, Jug. We shouldn’t be together, our families have done horrible things” y/n told him as she lifted her head, blinking at him through her tears. 

“But that doesn’t have to stop us. You don’t have to go” he pleaded, taking her face in his hands. 

“I have to go. Goodbye, Jughead” she whispered with a cry, taking his hands away from her face. He tried to fight with her as much as he could but she managed to get away. 

“No, wait! Please y/n don’t go!” he called after her but she was already running away, just like he said she was doing “I love you!” 

He’d never said those three words before and it almost made her stop, but her steps came faster and her tears fell heavier as she ran towards the car. She flung open the door and clambered inside. Cheryl and her mother watched y/n with raw eyes for a solid moment, and then Penelope spoke the command to make the driver move. 

Her heart was heavy and aching in her chest, and she wished she could have left that behind her as easily as she had left Riverdale. The town she was born and raised in disappeared from view the faster they drove, and with it the ghosts of those left behind. 

In the distance the sun was rising and for now she knew those ghosts would sleep. Until they would be awoken again when darkness fell.

[bughead-bound-blog]

Softening the Edges - Betty/Jughead

Prologue

Chapter 1: Childhood Reflections

“I still remember when you used to be nine years old I was a fool for you from the bottom of my soul”

—

He still remembered the day she noticed him. Archie’s home had permanently become his sanctuary, but Betty living next door was the happiest accident that had ever happened to him. Her family was a permanent blur of lively sound and color playing on in the background of his life at Archie’s house. The Coopers often proved to be an endless source of entertainment to two young small town boys. FP and Fred would sometimes keep company in the house, but the tree house belonged to him and Archie. That was their childhood world.

Betty was a part of that world in her own way. In the beginning she had always been there, radiating warmth whenever she passed below their tree house.

He and the red-headed boy took to peering curiously from the safety of their boys only haven in the treetop at the firsthand activities of girls, rolling their eyes at the ridiculous goings-on that occupied their time. Betty and Polly would sometimes be seen out on the lawn chasing one another, cartwheeling, dancing and giggling with a boom box out on the front porch, or tying one another’s golden hair into pig tails.

From the very earliest frame of time that he could trace her back in his memory, Betty Cooper was a snatch of sunshine that would pass by like a warm breeze, petrifying him every time she was near.  As if witnessing some breathing fable, he would pause wide eyed and vulnerable on the sidewalk with nowhere to hide before Archie came out. He would try to blend in with his surroundings. He would hold his breath, invisible, and watch her pass by in awe.

Then one day she just looked over her shoulder brightly, dimples deepening her smile, and chirped: “Hi!”

He nearly choked.

This became a ritual. He’d either be en route to Archie’s or waiting for him, and this vibrant whirlwind of daylight would whisk by and chat easily to him as he just stared, strangling on responses he never managed to muster. Girls were not a thing that was on his radar yet, and she was the only one his age that had bothered to notice he was alive so far.

The turning point was the day she blasted past him on the sidewalk laughing maniacally as a frantic jingle lifted to the neighbourhood, announcing ice cream.

“HURRY BETTY!!!” Polly screamed from some unseen location on Cooper property, startling anything that breathed nearby.

Betty’s light-up sneakers were flashing madly as she held a fist of change out in front of her like a warrior in a battle charge, in hot pursuit of the ice cream truck whisking by.

“Hey kid I got four dollars!” She suddenly bawled out from up ahead and flicked a quick look back at him. “Want somethin’?”

His eyes grew huge. Before he could even recover, the time to answer had long passed and she was already making her way back to him. She held out a random bounty to him anyway and dropped it unceremoniously into his cupped hands. He didn’t even look down at it. She looked so smug and proud of herself, and he was slightly taken aback by this gesture. It was a moment that would live with him as one of the earliest acts of kindness he’d experienced from a stranger.

She tore open the wrapper to one of two ice creams she was still holding brusquely with her teeth.

“Don’t worry it’s a good one.” She assured thickly, already partially into her own confection on a stick. “Have a nice day. Bye!” She said cheerily, carrying off an extra for her sister.

He was now left standing outside her house, still staring down at the token in his palms. Even then as new to the world as he was, he knew he was already in trouble.

—

“So was it a good ice cream buddy?”

He nearly jumped out of his skin the day following the ice cream incident, sitting on Archie’s front porch soaking up the sunlight. She was just suddenly there beside him, too close for comfort. He felt especially humiliated as the truth was, he had been so moved by her small gesture of kind-heartedness that he’d kept the Popsicle stick. She laughed at his startled reaction.

“Hi again! You must really like Archie, huh.” She smiled. “I notice you here a lot.”

He stared, face burning. He had no idea how to deal with her. What made her such a sunny and bold child?

“Ya don’t talk much do you?” She giggled, and he ducked his head. “I’m Betty.”

She stuck out a hand which bore a gigantic ring pop and no less than twelve brightly coloured, gaudy bracelets surely crafted by herself and Polly. He took her hand and felt a flood of embarrassment at the contact. She was just staring at him now, grinning. “Well?”

He blinked.

“You don’t got a name, or–”

“Hey Juggie!” Archie busted out onto the front patio then paused abruptly when he noticed the girl. He cleared his throat. “Betty.”

The blonde haired girl suddenly turned a fiery scarlet from her roots to her shoes and got up from where she was sitting beside Jughead.

“Hi Arch.” She seemed to gain composure of herself again, shifting her weight impatiently while twirling the ends of both pigtails in her hands. “Guess what? I came over cuz Polly and I just got super soakers. We have extra if you wanna try.”

Archie scoffed in the most boyish manner possible, and it was his turn to flush.

“Like we’re gonna play super soakers with a couple of girls. You’d just lose.”

“I think you’re just scared cuz you know we’d win.” Betty grinned challengingly, and for Jughead it was more than his poor young, awkward soul could handle. He would rather die right there than admit that he’d love nothing more than to lose a match of super soakers to Betty Cooper today.

She suddenly turned her gaze on him, as if reading his mind, and he quickly looked down at the bright white tips of his Chuck Taylor’s, mortified.

“Bye Juggie! You can come over to my house if ya get bored.”

“He doesn’t wanna play with girls!” Archie shrieked and stomped as she skipped back toward her house, cackling with delight.

Once she disappeared inside, Archie promptly looked around himself and then leaned in very close.

“OK so I didn’t wanna say I wanted to play with girls, but they got super soakers and it’s really fun at their house so when we go over you say it was your idea.”

— Several days later …

—

Jughead and Archie were sprawled out along the floor of their tree house with various comic books scattered all around them.

“This one’s really scary.” Archie gulped, face and eyes into a Spidey comic with the savage, needle-toothed visage of Venom gracing the cover. “My dad don’t let me read these yet.”

“My dad don’t care.” Jughead shrugged, thumbing through a Wolverine spin off.

Both boys squawked and scrambled noisily when the door to their tree house suddenly pushed itself open from the bottom, flicking some comics through the air and catapulting them against the wall. This was a rare occurrence considering their parents always knocked before pushing the door up, but the mystery was quickly solved when Betty’s smiling head popped up through the entrance, beaded arms tapping on the wooden planks.

“Whatcha guys doin’ up here? I’m bored.”

“BETTY!” Archie roared, leaping to his feet. “GET OUTTA HERE! NO GIRLS ALLOWED!” He bellowed in a desperate bid to maintain the sacred childhood tradition of gender boundaries. “This is OUR tree house!”

“So? You used MY super soakers and ate MY chips a few days ago. Why can’t I come up?”

“No Betty, this is a boys only club for me and Juggie. Besides, girls don’t like comic books.”

“I do TOO like comic books” Betty retorted hotly, growing flustered and hurt. “Wonder Woman’s my favourite.”

“She’s DC, WE like MARVEL.”

“Come on let me in Archie!”

“No Betty, boys only!”

And upon viewing her blotched red face, angry and ready to burst into tears, Jughead suddenly blurted:

“I don’t mind.”

The warring pair paused in astonishment, Betty thrilled, Archie betrayed. Jughead thought his heart was going to pound its way out of his chest as it thudded in his ears. Why did he say that? Archie looked desperately at his friend in a last ditch effort.

“Really, Jug? But I thought this was our place.”

“Well it is but I think Betty can come to. We DID use her super soakers, it’s only fair.”

Archie sighed loudly, sitting back on his heels in resignation as Betty gleefully scurried into the tree house. She kicked the door closed once she’d dragged herself in.

“Oops …” she frowned once she got to her feet as she realized her dress had hitched on the wood and a long strand of snag was trailing from a hole in the skirt. Archie huffed through his nose in long-suffering disapproval and huddled up in a corner moodily with his Spiderman comic as Jughead tentatively unhooked the string from the wood.

And thus their triad of companionship began to be woven by those first few tentative stitches of awkward childhood encounters: an ice cream Jughead had never asked for but had gotten anyway, a water gun fight that Archie pretended he never wanted but secretly had, the ultimate betrayal of the boys club, and a thread of pink hitched to the bottom of Archie Andrews’ tree house that was freed by the trembling fingers of a young Jughead Jones.

[simplyleez]

Dirty Little Secret

From the Riverdale kink meme here: http://riverdale-kinkmeme.dreamwidth.org/1356.html?thread=1868#cmt1868 

Prompt:  Archie likes dressing up. The girls can't decide if he makes a better good girl or bad girl.

It was late, the night was dark. The only room with a light on in the Andrews’ house was Archie’s. Fred was asleep, at least that’s what Archie hoped, and Jughead had gone to Pop’s to work on his novel so it gave him time. He searched quietly through the bottom of his wardrobe for what he needed.

Archie knew he should stop this… obsession, well he doesn’t quite know what to call it, but whatever it is it needs to stop before anyone finds out. If word spread he’d lose everything, the football team would cast him aside and no one would take his music seriously ever again.

His defeatist attitude quickly disappeared as his hand ran across a box hidden at the back, quickly pulling it out and placing it on his bed before kneeling in front of it. This part was always daunting for Archie; it was real and physically there in front of him. His secret.

Pulling the lid off the box, Archie smiled as he ran his hands across the various black materials. Jumping up, he hastily removed his shirt and shorts but stopped short of his boxers. Hooking his thumbs in the waistband, he sighed deeply before shoving them down and stepping out of them.

He pulled out a short, tight, black dress and a pair of simple, black pumps that he placed on the floor. His limited makeup bag, constructed from his mother’s old make up and any he found left from the girls at cheer practice, was next out of the box. Which only left his newest addition, the black, lacy bra and panties; a matching set..

Archie felt his face heat up, this was a new level for him but it would make him feel more the part. With shaking hands he lifted the panties out of the box, struggling to put them on as his legs wobbled ever so slightly from anticipation. They were slightly snug on his form as, well, they weren’t designed for him and women’s clothing sizes were ridiculous.

He laughed ever so slightly, remembering how the store assistant asked him about his ‘girlfriend’ he was buying them for.

He ran his hands over his arse, feeling the lace over his skin. Peering back into the box, Archie was slightly nervous, he couldn’t fill the bra out properly not just yet but maybe another day. So, he put the lid back onto the box.

Archie picked up the dress next, admiring the simple and plain design. It had thin straps, which Archie then wondered if may be a mistake, did it emphasise the size of his shoulders? Did it make him making him look bigger? Would he feel less feminine?

Nevertheless, Archie pulled the dress on over his head, dragging the material so it lay a few inches below his arse. The dress was fitted and extremely tight so not wearing the bra wasn’t a problem, however, he could clearly see and feel his dick straining against the material.

The makeup bag on his bed was old and worn down but just not by Archie which only made him feel slightly empty inside. However, he unzipped the small bag, pulling out eyeliner, mascara, and a lipstick coloured bright red. The colour reminded him so much of Cheryl but the only other he had was a pastel, baby pink which reminded him too much of Betty. He sighed at the thought of her, his perfect girl next door. Except, she wasn’t his perfect girl anymore, he’d lost her.

Pulling himself away from those feelings, he opened his eyeliner, using his mirror to apply it carefully. Then his mascara. He had to admit he was getting better at this after so much practise. Finally, he applied the lipstick, it was the only colour in his outfit and it collided nicely against his hair. But his hair was too short for his liking, he couldn’t grow it out he knew that but still he wished that sometimes when he felt like this he did have long, silky locks maybe like Veronica’s. He’s been torn with her hair, sometimes wanting to have it but sometimes wanting to run his fingers through it.

He put the lid back on his lipstick then putting away the makeup into the box. Archie sat on the end of his bed to put his pumps on, they weren’t high, maybe two inches, so they didn’t make him feel abnormally tall. He had to be careful to not make any noise and not wake his dad though.

Archie stood carefully, swivelling around so he could look at himself in the mirror. He smiled brightly at his own reflection, proud of his outfit and there were only a few items missing. He vaguely wondered if he should order a wig online but he didn’t need his dad questioning him. Archie knew he meant well but he wasn’t ready for anyone to know.

Moving further away from the mirror, so he was standing almost in the centre of his room, he turned to admire himself from the side. Movement from outside of his window caught his eye. He turned his head to the light only to see non other than Betty Cooper and Veronica Lodge peering into his window from Betty’s room.

Archie froze, blushed, then finally got out of the way of the window. He quickly kicked of his heels, pulled off his dress and panties, and put them back into the box after putting his pyjamas on.

He sat on his bed, knees crossed, as he heard his phone ping alerting him that he had a text. And another. Then another. After five messages, he finally decided to look.

Betty: Archie?

Betty: Arch please talk to me

Betty: You can tell me anything you know?

Betty: Arch you can’t avoid me forever :’(

Veronica: Archie, I won’t push you to tell me anything but I’m here for you just so you know. Me and Betty love you regardless don’t you ever forget that <3

“Shit” he swore quietly to himself, attempting to wipe away his lipstick in a rage. He was done for; his secret was out. He could only hope to avoid them through the weekend but Monday was bound to be hell.

-------------------

“Archiekins!” Veronica’s voice was too cheery for this time in the morning but Archie had a sneaking suspicion he knew why. He turned to see Veronica and Betty in the doorway, arms linked and matching smiles on their faces.

“Veronica. Betty.” He greeted them the best he could, attempting to act normally but his façade was weak. They’d seen what they’d seen, he couldn’t do anything about it but maybe he could apologise. “Look, girls, I’m sorry about-” Archie was interrupted by the girls sitting down opposite him and Veronica holding her hand up.

“Archie,” Betty spoke softly, less playful than Veronica “look we should be sorry. We were the ones spying on you and, well, we saw… you. B-but-.” “What B is trying to say is that we won’t judge you, hell, we’re more likely to support you in this but we do have a few questions.” Veronica’s voice was stern but supportive. Archie nodded his head in response not able to say much else.

“So is this like a fully time thing like, you know.” Betty struggled with conversations like this, stumbling over her words but Veronica was always there for her. “Betty’s trying to ask if you’re trans,” Veronica asked, clasping her hands together but must have decided it was too intimidating so resorted to holding one of Betty’s hands against her thigh.

“N-no it’s just-” Archie coughed, trying to string words together but he couldn’t quite make sense of them in his own head, “it just is, ok?” Veronica and Betty shared a look but seemed to accept his answer.

Veronica’s eyes sharpened as she leaned closer to Archie, he knew that look and hoped she decided to leave the serious conversation for another time and he was right.

“So… are you a good girl or a bad girl?” Veronica’s smirk was wicked and she was plotting what he’d look like in a thousand different ensembles so Archie looked at Betty for help, she simply shrugged and smiled back at him. His girls were going to be a handful now.

[wcwit]

Riverdale Reviews: Season 1 Ep 12 “Anatomy of a Murder”

[My other Riverdale reviews here]

In the penultimate episode of Riverdale, the answer to the question that’s been hanging over everything else this season finally gets answered: Who killed Jason Blossom?

[Full review under the cut]

It was his father, Clifford Blossom.

Usually I’d save talking about an episode ending plot revelation like that until the end of one of these reviews/recaps, but a lot happens on Riverdale in this episode. I want to talk about it all in context of that reveal. Many elements from the show come together in this episode to bring the characters to a place where they have this answer. The central characters put themselves through the ringer this episode to find out who really killed Jason after discover FP had been framed along with one other problem, he confessed because Clifford threatened Jughead’s life.

Sheriff Keller is intense as hell throughout this episode, which makes sense since he’s finally facing the man he thinks committed a crime he hasn’t been able to solve for months. FP’s confession complicates things for everyone in the cast this week; no one will believe Archie and Veronica that he was framed, Jughead has the last bit of faith he had in his dad ripped from him, and Cheryl is less at peace with Jason’s death than ever before. Jughead starts the episode trying to go to Toledo to see his mom and Jellybean, but breaks down when he’s told he can’t in one of the best acting moments Cole Sprouse has gotten in this season. He feels like he must live with his father’s sins for the rest of his life, gets interrogated by the Sheriff and school principal, then gets slapped by Cheryl while trying to apologize. It’s a specter hanging over him that even makes Fred question whether he should even let Archie continue to hang out with his best friend. It’s not until Jughead goes to talk to his dad in jail that he believes FP didn’t do it (“He’s lied to me my entire life, but he’s never been any good at it.”) From that point, he’s ready to help see if there’s any way his dad might be innocent.

FP’s confession has a few holes in it that are easy to spot for those paying attention throughout the season, namely that he was the one that stole the files on Jason’s murder from Sheriff Keller’s house. We know from “The Last Picture Show” that Hal Cooper stole everything. When he hears the news about the confession, he sneaks into the Cooper household to get rid of it so he can’t possibly be connected to the crime or have anyone find out about the connection between the Coopers and the Blossoms. He reveals to Betty and Alice that the animosity between the families didn’t start between business partners, but between brothers. The Coopers are descended from the Blossoms, which is the real reason Hal had a problem with Polly dating Jason. With this new knowledge, the Coopers rush to Thornhill to get Polly out before something happens to her, only for Penelope and Clifford Blossom to reveal they don’t care about the incest. Cliff says the two weren’t that closely related and Penelope says Polly’s babies are a blessing because “nothing could be more purely Blossom.” Hal’s reaction of “What the hell is wrong with you people?!” before they finally get Polly out of there is a perfect summation of the Blossoms on this show.

Veronica spends the episode thinking about her parents’ connections to the Southside Serpents and by extension FP. When news of the confession hits, Hermione warns her to prepare to get out of town in case anything ends up tracing back to them. Veronica’s as ready as everyone else to get all the details on what happened. Joaquin, the Serpent Kevin’s been dating, takes them to where the one other Serpent who knew about Jason was living, only to find him dead from overdose with the money Hiram payed the Serpents to trash the drive-in in his room.

Before the real answer is given, Betty and Jughead look over everything they know and narrow down the suspects to two possibilities; Hiram Lodge or the Blossoms. Cheryl asks to her mom about why Jason didn’t have “the stomach” to run the family business. Penelope drags her to the barn where their barrels of syrup are stored to show Cheryl that syrup is all there is to the business and she can “drown in it.”

The obvious answer at this point would seem to be that it was Hiram that hired the Serpents to kill Jason, but Alice points out that answer is too neatly put together with few loose ends left over. On the hint of Joaquin, the characters find FP’s “insurance policy” in case things went bad, Jason’s letterman jacket. It’s in the jacket they find a USB of security footage showing exactly what happened, Clifford Blossom shooting his own son in the head in the basement of the Southside Serpents’ bar. Betty’s first instinct is to call Cheryl to tell her to get out of Thornhill, but instead she confronts her father with the words, “You did a bad thing daddy. Now everyone knows.”

This episode has a lot going on by necessity, it’s the episode where we get the answers for what’s been happening this entire season as true motives are revealed. Among all the drama is some of the best character work in the season; Veronica being able to figure out Jughead is staying at Pop’s since it’s the only place in Riverdale open 24 hours, Betty taking comfort in the fact that despite everything else Polly is finally back home with her, and Kevin kissing Joaquin goodbye when he leaves town, because even though their relationship started so Joaquin could get information they did like each other a lot.

However, a few new threads are left at the end of this episode. Hiram Lodge will be released from prison soon and he’s coming to Riverdale. Meanwhile, when the police come to arrest Clifford at Thornhill, they find him hanged in the barn with a barrel of maple syrup open to show it had bags of drugs stuffed inside.

The who in this whodunnit has been found out, but the finale, “The Sweet Hereafter”, is left to answer the question of why.

[theenetflixnerd]

Riverdale Recap. Chapter 3: Body Double

Right Oh! Daayyuuuuumm is about my initial reaction to this episode. I was a bit disappointed this week to be honest but Riverdale still has a fan in me yet. Let’s discuss the happenings of this episode. At first I was like “Meh. Boring episode and doesn’t add much to the story line” but after giving myself some time and watching it a second time - I was feeling better about it, however having said that I am still a little uncertain about some plot thickeners used in this episode - guess we’ll have to just wait and see where they lead to though (some of them I hope will be quashed or buried deep and far away to never resurface again- sorry CW)

So first things first - WELCOME to the RIVERDALE scene, Chuck Clayton! Chuck was always an awesome part of the comics! Except - where is his beloved Nancy? .... Not sure how I feel about this Chuck and Veronica thing. Although - Damn. That didn’t last long! .... The first date was initially great and I liked the pair together, however that kiss just seemed awkward and sloppy. Eeuww. Then the next day Chuck is revealed to be the stereotypical douchebag player by slut shaming V on Social Media? No thanks, CW. This ain’t the Chuck we know and love - c’mon here.

But what I do love about this however is that it provides our beautiful female heroines the chance to be all POWER TO THE WOMEN. Yes my inner feminazi is greatly appeased by this! I love the strength these girls portray fighting for their reputations and not letting any guys abuse them and trash their fellow females. Some of my favourite quotes 

‘ I don’t follow the rules. I make them, and when necessary.. I break them’ - Veronica Lodge

‘If you wanna help me get revenge ... you better be willing to Full Dark, No Stars!’ - Veronica Lodge

You go girl!! I’m kind of loving the fierce side of Veronica. 

Betty rounds up some other girls to help clear Veronica’s name and lo and behold, turns out not only Chuck but the majority of the football team are involved in this horrible ‘Game’ trying to catch these innocent unsuspecting girls and competing in some wretched ‘Playbook’. Seriously, this is like a major pet peeve for me. Could you be anymore of a douchebag? Honestly. Grrr! Cheryl is shocked to find out that Jason was involved in this behaviour too.... and Polly (Betty’s sister) was one of his victims (’Prissy prude by day , freak in the sheets by night’ - absolutely DISGUSTING that these asswipes can even talk about a girl that way. Aarrrggghh makes me so damn mad)

Glad they all got cut from the team and exposed - but what are the consequences???? I can’t wait to find out!!

So B and V concoct a plan to get Chuck to spill the truth and enter the scene BADASS BETTY! Dayum girl! She goes absolutely FULL DARK! No Stars! Betty? Who’s that?? ....  This is one of the story lines which I am not too sure I am comfortable with TBH. Don’t get me wrong I LOVE this fierce, feisty femme fatale - but I don’t like where this seems to be leading (all just theories here) ... Betty completely takes on this other persona and honestly it’s a little scary, she gets so in to it that she starts yelling at Chuck ranting on about how he ruined Polly and then she calls him JASON and screams “How could you do this to me? How could you destroy ME?’ - Uhm? When did your name change from Betty Cooper to Polly Copper? ... and then when V talks to her the next day she doesn’t seem to remember the details ... I am just hoping this weird split personality thing is just a one-off moment of stress and not a complete psycho alter ego who perhaps went as far as to kill Jason? I mean who knows right - but I am begging now CW - please don’t ruin my childhood by making my sweet, beloved Betty the villain here. My heart couldn’t take it!

Another thread in the episode is the fact that Cheryl admits she DID help Jason disappear, and he was alive and well when she left him on the other side of the River, and while hugging him goodbye she too had heard the gunshot. No one believes her, until our hot hero, Archie comes forward and corroborates her story ... although he still is trying to protect the much despised (by me) Ms Grundy (eeuuggh I just can’t stand her!) so makes up a story about being there with his dog and writing Music. Ofcourse, this isn’t the end of it Archies dad gets upset that Archie lied (as he had thought Arch was on a roadtrip wiht Juggie) and grounds him. Cheryl offers to grant any wish for Archie as a thank you for coming forward about the gunshot - nothing is off limits except her body - but well all know if Archie wanted it he probably coulda got it. 

What does he wish for? Writing for Josie and Pussycats.  Loved these scenes and sure that this is gonna be the start of something beautiful.

Fred Andrews finally comes around after talking to Ms Grundy about Archie. No, this not awkward at all! ha ... ha .. haha. This scene was just painful to watch.

Jugheads research leads him to learning that Dilton Doily was the one who shot that gun on July 4th but thats not all .... to save his own ass he relates some information which well let’s just say Archie is screwed .... Dilton saw Ms Grundy’s car at the river that day. Wonder what she was doing there? Oh wait I mean who. 

So, Ms Grundy is now exposed well kind of - and judging from the promo for episode 4 it’s gonna be an interesting one. Turns out the REAL Ms Grundy (one who actually looks like Ms Grundy from the comics) died years ago .... so who is this imposter? and what is she doing in Riverdale? 

Riverdale, you hooked me again!! I can’t wait for next week!!

[bettyandveronicadoubledigest]

Episode 1: “The River’s Edge”

First of all before I say literally anything else:

WHERE is Midge???

Hey there what’s up I just want you to know that when I typed out the title I almost put “Season 1, Episode 1” but TBH I’m not going to make that kind of commitment until I know this is more than a one-season thing. I thought at first this would be a one-season thing but who knows, seriously. I hope to God this show gets literally as convoluted as possible and continues on to receive the award for Maximum Success Attainable By A Teen Drama (6-7 seasons, à la Gossip Girl and Pretty Little Liars).

Ok first of all I love Archie Comics. I LOVE Archie Comics. Now that I’ve said that, you know I have enough credibility to talk about Riverdale On The CW and you have to take me seriously. I love Archie Comics. I peaked around the time of the Archie Corporation TM’s last-ditch attempt at relevancy with the “New Look” series—Betty & Veronica Bad Boy Trouble which was quite literally horrible and something we do not need to talk about at all. Sexy biker Betty, OMG. Sexy biker Betty!!! The best part about this story was Nick St. Clair’s catchphrase—“A saint I ain’t,” says Nick St. Clair. He was SO ugly and not really that bad at all, because in 2007 Archie Corp did not realize it could be truly edgy yet. Also his shirt literally just says “METAL.” 

 I also want to make it clear that I was lying when I said Nick’s catchphrase was the best part—this was the WORST part and obviously a huge ripoff of the CLASSIC Lizzie McGuire episode “Bad Girl McGuire,” where the Bad Girl was “a devil named Angel.”

ANYWAY. We are not gathered here today for Lizzie McGuire. Riverdale. Wow. I didn’t follow much of the show’s production, just knew it was happening and saw the hype casting of former TV twin (current actual twin) Cole Sprouse. But about a week ago I became the show’s target market, apparently, and was absolutely barraged by Riverdale advertising. The promos were interesting, sure, because they gave away LITERALLY THE ENTIRE PLOT. Which wouldn’t have mattered if this were just Pals ’n’ Gals Archie, but this is CW Archie! Archie With A Secret! Maybe I’m glad though, because I think if I had just seen Archie and Grundy banging without knowing about it beforehand my heart might have stopped and I would have died and then I wouldn’t be writing this today. Geraldine!!! What are you doing!!!!

Archie and Ms. Grundy’s Bug bang sesh (complete with Grundy in Lolita glasses, barf) set the tone for the whole damn hour of television entertainment. It very quickly became apparent that this show is entirely 100% about the banging. The weird interaction between Fred Andrews and Hermione Lodge was about banging. Moose’s whole character development will be about banging. And I’m willing to say right now after the episode 1 that the murder of Jason Blossom was about banging—either banging Polly Cooper or banging Cheryl because there is no way in which this show could play out without all roads leading to incest.

Moose! I love a good jock-in-the-closet subplot a la Glee, and Moose even seems like a fine person to be that jock—except WHERE is Midge?? And maybe more importantly, where is Ethel??? I figure we’ll get to see Weatherbee and some other secondary characters soon, but I hope we get those girls. If there’s an Ethel, she’s going to be involved in some hard-to-watch plot where Cheryl is pure awful to her.

Riverdale was really good and intriguing—I think it’ll be easy to figure out where the show’s going, but not without a lot of complication and not without a lot of parts that don’t make a lot of sense and not without a lot of banging. Who Killed Jason Blossom? is definitely a secondary plotpoint—a lot of viewers are going to return to see just where they’re going with the Betty-Veronica-Archie dynamic. As with the comics, Archie is the main character in theeeeeory, but he’s definitely the least interesting of the whole lot. Will he get more interesting? It’s not likely. In the tradition of The OC and Gossip Girl, even the parents have a lot more to do than the character stuck in the whiny baby man protagonist trope. But it was a good pilot!!! A fun pilot!!! The acting wasn’t half bad and the cinematography was nice and everyone was really, really pretty!!! And following along with Betty and Veronica and Kevin and Cheryl and Alice and even SMITHERS will be a lot of fun. I hope.

Yes: -Dilton!!!!!! Doiley!!!!!! his turn as a Boy Scout leader was so cute and nice and he better show up more -Betty Veronica and Archie all look exactly like their comic book counterparts <3_<3 -Betty as a Girl With Issues works really, really well; Madchen Amick was excellent and I can’t wait to see what they decide to do… did Betty kill Jason Blossom because that would truly be Something -The conversation between Archie and his dad was perfect and put an appreciated end to the High School Musical potential Archie-dad relationship so hopefully no more of that -Smithers hahahahahahah

Hard no:

-Why?? wasn’t Jughead shown eating a burger even one time... what’s up with that -PLEASE drop the Grundy/Archie Hot For Teacher thread soon… please…. it’s pretty weird this was the decided plot point because it means the affair took place the summer after AA’s freshman year so he was like 15 which is not only gross but also EXTRA gross -The B&V kiss was really stupid and everyone can agree they literally just stuck in there for excitement in the trailer but whatever -Archie’s songs are really.. really bad … he’s on some James Hurley shit