#lmao i might be more inconsistent this year but who knows

[starrrbitz-movedtonewblog]

Hi everyone

Thanks for sticking around this blog

Sorry for being very inactive and inconsistent in 2022, well to be fair I've always been that way on this blog but honestly it's been worse.

I did my first year of art school in 2022 so that's was the major contributing factor to why I forgot to post on here. The other reason was that I've become more of a lurker on tumblr and also just kind of tired of posting my art to this blog I made when I was like 16.

There's a lot of stuff on this blog that shows who I used to be, which isn't really bad or problematic, just me being cringe which I still am lol. I had fun and that was the most important part, I think just have grown up ig

I am still very enthusiastic in tags and about what I love, cause that's just who I am.

In any case, I dunno what's gonna happen to this blog. I don't really want to delete it or just abandon it, but posting here regularly has become a bit harder.

I'll still post art onto here because I love doing that, it just won't be as frequent. Anyone who's still following me despite how inconsistent my art uploads have been in 2022, thanks a lot, I think younger me first making this blog would appreciate it. But eh, I don't really care much about followers any more, even though they're very much appreciated.

(Also half of the users on this site are bots anyways, so thanks to all you real ones lol)

See you guys in 2023 if I do!

[canmom]

Hello! I absolutely love your blog, everything from your festival recounts to animation analysis and programming (one of tumblr's recommended posts was the one where you made your own rasteriser, and I liked your attitude in what I've read so much that I'm gonna attempt to conquer my 3-year-long grudge against using opengl during college and do something similar now that I'm a bit older and have no deadlines :D).

But anyway, I have 2 questions (sorry if there's easily accessible answers, tumblr search is not helping): 1. During your animation nights, does the screen stay black while everyone watches their own video while you provide commentary? I haven't caught any yet but maybe someday! And 2. do you have any youtube channels or just one-off video essays that you like that also cover animation/directors? Or, even programming lol.

Sorry for the long ask have a nice day!

hiii! i'm very touched that you like my dorky eclectic blog <3

For the Animation Nights, I just stream the video over Twitch from local sources on my computer, typically by playing the video in mpv and recording it in OBS. This is obviously not ideal from a video quality perspective, but it's the easiest way to watch video in sync without making everyone download files in advance. Then we all chat in the Twitch chat box (in large part to crack stupid jokes, it's not that highbrow lmao). I've gotten away with it so far!

As for youtube channels, I can recommend...

anime production/history (i.e. sakuga fandom)

SteveM is likely the most sakuga-fan affiliated anituber. He makes long, well-researched and in-depth videos on anime history, usually themed around a particular director or studio.

Pyramid Inu might be my fave anituber - very thoughtful analysis of Gundam, obscure mecha anime and oldschool BL and similar topics. tremendously soothing voice too.

The Canipa Effect does excellent deep dives into the production of specific shows, both western and anime. I appreciate the respect he gives to the Korean animators of shows like AtlA in particular!

Sean Bires's 2013 presentation on sakuga is pretty foundational to this whole subcultural niche, and a great place to get an introduction to the major animator names to know and significant points in the history of anime. unfortunately a couple of the segments got slapped down by copyright but the rest holds up!

animation theory (for animators and aspirants)

I'm going to focus here on resources that are relevant to animation in general, and 2D animation. if I was going to list every Blender channel we'd be here all week :p

New Frame Plus is one of the best channels out there for game animation, describing in tightly edited videos how animation principles work in a game context and analysing the animation of various games. highly recommend

Videogame Animation Study is similar, examining the animation of specific games in detail

the 'twelve principles of animation' (defined by Disney's Ollie Johnston and Frank Thomas) remain the standard approach to animation pedagogy; there are various videos on them, but Alan Becker (of Animator vs Animation) has quite a popular series. I haven't actually watched these but many people swear by them! Dermot O'Connor expands the list to 21. Note that some of the terminology can be a little inconsistent between different animators - c.f. 'secondary motion'...

Dong Chang is an animator at Studio NUT, who produces a lot of fantastic, succinct videos on standard techniques in the anime industry, timesheet notations, etc. etc. Studio Bulldog, a small anime studio, are a good complement; they focus more on douga than genga and are generally a bit more traditional.

programming

big topic here, I'm going to focus on game dev and tech art since that's my field. but also some general compsci stuff that's neat

SimonDev - graphics programmer with a bunch of AAA experience, fantastic explanations of advanced optimisations and some of the more counterintuitive aspects of rendering

Acerola - graphics programmer who makes very detailed guides to a variety of effects with a very rapid and funny 'guy that has seen monogatari' editing style. When he's good, he's really good. His video on water is probably the best one I've seen (though I can recommend a couple of others).

TodePond - the most charming, musical videos about recursion and cellular automata you've ever seen. less programming tutorial and more art in themselves.

Ben Eater - known for his breadboard computer series, a fantastic demonstration of how to go from logic gates up to the 6502 with actual hardware. worth watching just for how clean he puts the wires on his breadboards like goddamn man

Sebastian Lague, Useless Game Dev - both do 'coding adventure' style videos where they spend a few weeks on some project and then document it on Youtube, resulting in a huge library of videos about all sorts of fascinating techniques. great to dive into

Freya Holmér - creator of the 'shapes' library, makes videos on mathematical programming, with gorgeously animated vector graphics. Her video on splines is a particular treat.

There are definitely many more channels I can recommend on these subjects, but I'll need to dig into my history a bit - unfortunately I need to rush out right now, but hopefully that should be good to be getting going with!

[atopvisenyashill]

so I’ve been stewing a bit on rhaenyra and jace’s relationship in season 2, and i feel like they’re showing SOMETHING with the way that jace is so clearly chafing under his mother’s control and yet refuses to take that final step and eclipse her completely.

he keeps bringing up them needing daemon but is also sometimes trying to step into daemon’s role and be rhaenyra’s partner in leading their side. and rhaenyra seems to struggle with deciding whether to accept him as that partner or continue treating him more as a child. and part of that is the normal parenting quandary of your teen transitioning to adulthood, but i think part is also the knowledge that treating him as a man rather than a boy puts her in danger of losing her authority to him.

but daemon wasn’t his only (or even his main) role model for how to interact with rhaenyra growing up, so perhaps the restraint he shows (in comparison to how we see aegon and aemond interact with alicent) comes from always ranking BELOW his mother rather than above her, and from seeing her largely interact with men who were below her in rank.

i dunno, my thoughts aren’t quite coherent, but i feel like jace sometimes wishes he could be his mother’s superior rather than the other way around, perhaps even recognizes that it might be easier to get the lords to listen to him than to her because he is male, yet as frustrating as he finds it, he keeps turning to rhaenyra as his authority figure anyway. what are your thoughts on how their relationship has been portrayed so far?

My thoughts concisely are: I really love what they're doing and I love how it plays with the "eldest daughterson" of both of their stories.

More in depth though and note I did not proofread this because I'm tired lmao-

I think you nailed it that Jacaerys both wants to overrule her but is careful not to. I think a large part of Jacaerys feels...maybe not quite like he would be a better leader than his mother but maybe more like, if she named him Hand and let him take the lead in the War Shenanigans, he would do a better job at keeping them all safe. Like when Rhaenyra was a young girl, Jacaerys wants an outlet to prove himself with, wants to get out in front of The People and be seen as competent, fearless, and bold. If this was a "normal" situation where Rhaenyra was a man, Jacaerys could argue publicly with his father without worrying that he's undercutting her authority - look at how Tywin openly fights with his own father while Tytos is still alive! But in this case, because Rhaenyra is a woman, Jacaerys has to tread carefully. He can't overrule her or he makes her seem weak, and no longer a viable candidate for the throne. Because Jacaerys is a good heir who is clearly tuned into the dynamics he's part of, he doesn't want to make her seem like she doesn't know what's doing. I think this is why he tends to phrase his criticism not as "that's a dumb idea" (look to how, for example, Aegon, Aemond, Viserys, and Daemon frame their criticisms at Small Council meetings - they aren't afraid to be mean!) but more as "that idea would get you harmed" aka he's not dismissing her plans outright, moreso attempting to point out that she's being reckless with her own safety.

I think Jacaerys is being genuine when he says he wouldn't want to be ruled by anyone else but his mother. I think he really does love her and believe in her ability to be a good ruler. I also think he just has a lot of hangups around dads and their ability to rule effectively - Viserys completely shoots Rhaenyra in the foot before she's even been crown princess a year, Laenor seems to have been inconsistent (due to several factors, one of them mpossibly being thatRhaenyra did not want Laenor to be an active father, and Laenor being strong armed by his wife may also play a role in how Jacaerys sees his mother, parenthood, and power), Lyonel ~took Harwin away from them, and Daemon is just as unreliable as Laenor but in a much different way. hell even Corlys is much less reliable as a parent and grandparent than Rhaenys is. All around him, Jacaerys is faced with fathers that don't measure up and mothers with strong wills, chief among them his own mother. I do think some of his hostility towards the men of the council and Daemon specfically comes from the fact that he feels like they don't see Rhaenyra the way he does - as this noble, endlessly suffering queen without peer. He knows his mother has flaws, yes, but when he looks at her (up until this argument in the last episode) he sees a woman who has had her back against the wall since the day he was born but has handled it with grace and dignity and grit, and it bothers him that the men of the council and Daemon seem so willing to overrule her words.

At the same time, Jacaerys has grown up in a very patriarchal society and under normal circumstances, at his age, he would be his mother's superior. I do think that is something on his mind whenever they fight. I think he sees himself - or wants to be - her sword arm, her shield, the warrior in front of her taking the damage. I think you're right that his multitude of paternal figures come into play here. Harwin was literally her sworn sword, Daemon wants to be her rabid dog, Corlys and Rhaenys had a largely equal (in private) relationship, every other man who interacts with Rhaenyra except Viserys is supposed to defer to her, and so I think in order to not eclipse his mother, he's taking his cues from them. Like you said, taking too much authority from her means she might never get her authority back, and not only does Jacaerys love his mother and feel like she deserves to have a Loyal Heir, A Good Son, A Proper Shield Arm By Her Side, he knows that if he eclipses his mother too much, he's throwing his own claim into question. We see this tremendous distance between Jacaerys and Aegon & Viserys in a way we don't see between him and Joffrey. I think he's terrified of his little brothers and what happens when his mother dies, and since Rhaenyra has always been his staunchest supporter (even though he doubts often whether she really is supporting him or whether she plans to name a little one over him, again until that argument when he realizes exactly what's going through her mind), he needs her around as long as possible so he can cement his claim and establish himself as A Proper Prince And Heir. This is also, imo, why he seems to want Daemon back despite clashing with him - I think he feels he and Daemon can tag team on Rhaenyra in private to get her to see things their way, but he resents a) Daemon's place at her side and b) that Daemon is, idk ~reckless~ enough to challenge Rhaenyra in front of other people. He lets Daemon threaten the Kingsguard because he doesn't inherensagree with Daemon's violence! But he attempts to put Daemon in his place when Daemon seems to barrel over what Rhaenyra desires.

And from Raenyra's PoV it's like - it's just exactly like her and her father. Obviously Rhaenyra treats her other children better than Viserys treats Alicent's kids (not that this is hard, lol), but in the same vein as being Queen and knowing the prophecy is confirmation and validation that yes, Viserys chose her, he loved her the most, he believed in her, Rhaenyra feels all of that for Jacaerys. She has never once looked at Aegon the Younger as a viable heir because for Rhaenyra, there IS no other heir but Jacaerys. She chose him, she loves him, she trusts him, she believes in him and she feels like she's shown this to him time and time again. But just like Viserys, she's incredibly short sighted and not working hard enough to ensure there's no succession crisis after she herself dies because like her father, she believes that she can simply make the world as she wants it to be simply by speaking it into existence. I don't think entitlement is the right word - she was named heir by her father, it's not "entitlement" the same way that Alicent's issue with Rhaenyra lying about having pre-marital sex is not just Alicent being religiously repressed. there's more to it, yes that's a factor but it's more complex because of the nature of feudalism where every action is both personal and political - nor do I think Rhaenyra and Viserys believe themselves to be gods. It's more like...they believe they have the ear of the gods, like they have a direct phone number extension to The Gods Above (whomever they may be) and that since they have that link, they have a responsibility to lead people in the direction the gods want them to go. They're not crazy, it's everyone else that's insane, everyone else can only see their thread but Rhaenyra and Viserys have been given a glimpse of the entire tapestry (again, my Stannis comparisons here - it's not just that Stannis is real high off his own supply, it's that he feels he has a responsibility to save the world. This is not an inherently bad trait to have - I'm sure a lot of people feel they have a responsibility to make the world better! But it becomes a problem when you convince yourself that Only You are capable of doing the saving and ignore all the evidence pointing towards this maybe not being a good or healthy path to walk). So I think Rhaenyra feels like... "my father chose me but he fumbled several times when it came to protecting my claim because of Those Evil Scheming Hightowers but i will be Viserys But Better by making it clearer to Jacaerys that I choose him" and she thinks that's all she has to do to fix the situation. I think Rhaenyra feels like her father had advisors that took advantage of him (she's not wrong here either she's just wrong that Viserys holds no blame for the situation) which is why she keeps Jacaerys close but seems to subtly undermine him in public. She knows she can't give him too much authority but she also knows she needs to keep her heir looped in at all times, she needs to do what Viserys didn't and keep her Daemon/Rhaenyra close by, on her councils, having a say, and supported. The problem is that she will always prioritize her own claim over Jacaerys'. The problem is that she doesn't act to combat her problems until it's far too late.

[peony-pearl]

Homestead

Here is the fic in it’s entirety without all the readmores; thanks again to everyone who kept up with this! This fic wasn’t meant to happen at all and was all written from the top of my head the moment I included Niwa and the kids lmao, so if anything consider this a rough draft for Ozai and Niwa’s story. It’s not perfect and there are some inconsistencies but I’ll tend to those as the main story begins to develop more ^^

****

A healed Azula having her first violent outburst in years after finding Ozai in his hiding spot in the Earth Kingdom. She has him pinned, aiming her hand that is popping with charged lightning right at his heart.

‘Beg for my forgiveness.’ She seethes as Zuko panics behind her.

Ozai remains calm.

Years have passed, long enough to realize what he did to them.

He does not deserve to even beg. He closes his eyes.

Azula’s own eyes are overcome with tears. The lightning is at its zenith.

But she is not her father. She releases the lighting into the air with a curse.

****

Azula trembles. She could hit him; she could hurt him, but she remains frozen. Fire and lightning boil within her blood. She feels Zuko grab her arm, pulling her away clumsily before she can hurt him - or herself.

“Let go,” she hisses softly to her older brother. Ozai remains still, only moving to open his eyes and to heave a sigh, releasing his pent up breath and muscles. There’s an added layer to his relief, one that he dreads them learning - he must convince them to leave. “What I did to you-”

“Don’t,” Azula snarled. “Don’t you dare say a word. What do you know? What do you know of what you did to us?! Do you even care?!”

Ozai swallows; his gut turns. Azula is finding her footing again. She is no longer the girl that cowered at his raised voice. Nor is Zuko the worried, wet-behind-the-ears Fire Lord. They have both grown in stature and demeanor, and have left all traces of Ozai’s influence behind, leaving two grown royals in place of Fire Lord Ozai: a deplorable, angry warlord trying to live up to a legacy larger than the ego he boasted.

An ego he himself had shed - but it was the ego that had bruised, burned, and shunned these two children.

Zuko tried to keep Azula from growling into Ozai’s face, looking every inch like a dragon. The first daughter born to the Fire Nation Royal Family in three generations had more fight in her than every male that preceded her.

“I hope you rot,” Azula spat. “I hope you die alone,” she said, smoke billowing from her mouth.

Zuko, trying to keep Azula from doing something she might regret, hears a twig snap; he turns around.

Ozai’s stomach plummets as Azula continues to berate him.

“Chen?!”

A voice cuts through Azula’s train of thought; she realizes Ozai is grimacing and looking away from all of them. Azula turns, seeing that Zuko is already frozen in place.

A woman stands in the path leading from the wooded area. Small in stature, with thick brown hair and olive eyes. She carries a basket full of finds from the land around them, pears, apples, mushroom and herbs. A swathe of cloth wraps around her chest to carry something snug against her chest; wisps of a baby’s hair peek out of the bindings.

Next to her, a small girl stands, holding a jackalope that is poised to be that night’s supper. Despite her small stature, she bears an expression that is very similar to Ozai’s when he is aggravated; she has the woman’s thick hair, but it’s black like Ozai’s.

The woman puts the basket down on the ground, supporting the baby bundled against her.

“Chen, who are these people?!”

Zuko and Azula stare at Ozai, whose face has become a nauseous green.

****

“Chen?”

The name blurts out of Azula’s mouth as Ozai doesn’t meet her eyes. Instead, for the first time since their reunion, Ozai uses force, but only to move past Azula so he can meet the concerned woman, who rushes forward to touch Ozai’s shoulder. “What is happening?”

“It’s alright, Niwa,” he says.

Niwa looks at the visiting siblings cautiously. “I don’t buy that.”

“It’s fine; I promise. Come on; let’s get the kids inside and start dinner and we can sort this out.”

Niwa stares at him, concern written in her brow. “Chen.”

But Ozai offers her a smile before gently cradling the wispy hair of the newborn strapped to her chest. Ozai looks to Zuko and Azula. “Niwa is a skilled cook; her roast jackalope is the best this side of the Earth Kingdom. You’re welcome to join us.”

Azula’s lip curled. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”

Zuko remained silent. He turned to the small girl slowly making her way towards Ozai and Niwa, holding tight to the jackalope in her hands. Her eyes don’t deviate from Zuko; despite her timid demeanor, she does not back down. Once she walks past Zuko, she rushes towards Ozai, who allows her to cling to him.

Azula bristles.

“Come now,” Ozai announces, nodding towards the house. “Let’s talk about this over a good meal. Or if you don’t have the time, perhaps you can visit again sometime soon.”

Azula watches as Zuko joins her.

They watch Ozai’s hand gently lead the small girl into the home.

Azula stomps forward towards the house.

****

It was tense inside. The small girl bustled in the kitchen without a word as she skillfully prepared all of the smaller ingredients for dinner. Ozai had taken the jackalope outside to butcher it. Zuko had all but held Azula in place to keep her from going to find where Ozai kept butchering materials - she had half a mind to gut her father.

Niwa returned from hers and Ozai’s bedroom, having taken a few moments to nurse and change the baby. She joined her daughter in the kitchen as Zuko and Azula sat at the table.

Zuko noted Azula’s anger at boiling point. He knew it was time to make peaceful engagements.

“… I’m sorry for any concern miss… Niwa?” He said. Niwa turned to look his way and she nodded, still on guard.

“Do you two know Chen?”

Azula’s frown deepened.

Zuko folded his hands, shrugging.“Yeah. It’s been a long time since we’ve seen him.”

Niwa folded her arms, leaning back against a counter. “Then maybe you can tell me why I met him in the sorry state he was in. Beaten and blacked out and half drowned in the forest out there. We’re a ways away from a town, so I wasn’t sure exactly how he got here.”

Zuko pondered for a moment. “That I can’t tell you.”

Azula’s laser-like gaze pierced through Niwa. “Looks like you’re not complaining that he’s around.”

Niwa met Azula’s glare. “No; I suppose not. I helped him get back on his feet, but for a while he couldn’t do much; whatever happened to him really took it out of him. When he recovered, he helped me rebuild my gardens that I’d used to feed both of us. It’s only been me for years so suddenly having two people took a bite out of my reserves.” Niwa smiled. “But then we became three, and now four.”

“Are you married?” Zuko asked. Niwa laughed.

“Not officially. Things just kind of happened; we’ve never really talked about it. When I realized I was expecting,” she said, patting her daughter’s head, “he just kind of said ‘all right then’ and stayed with me. He just… accepted it. He farmed when I couldn’t, learned how to cook, hunt, fish, butcher; he likes to stay busy. I’ve noticed when he doesn’t have a list of chores he becomes distant. When Chiyo here was born, we’re so displaced that getting a midwife was almost impossible for when the time came; and yet he never panicked; it’s like he runs on that chaos. Even so, he’s the one who’s put both of our children into my arms when they’ve arrived; he was the same way when Katsu arrived three weeks ago.”

Azula stood with a furious scrape of her chair, which clattered to the floor. Niwa jumped, but quickly moved to stand in front of Chiyo; but Azula wasn’t interested in moving towards them. Instead, she headed for the door that led outside, slamming it so loud that the trio still inside waited to hear if Katsu would begin crying.

“What did I say?!” Niwa asked as the pressure in the room deflated. She looked to Zuko. His eyes told her there was something he knew about this situation.

“You know him, don’t you?”

Zuko took a deep breath.

“My name is Fire Lord Zuko.”

Niwa’s mouth went slack as Zuko continued.

“That was my sister, Princess Azula.”

Chiyo held tight to her mother. Zuko thought he saw a smaller version of himself clinging to Ursa, who now resided back at the palace with her husband, Noren, and daughter, Kiyi. Zuko was slowly taking it in that he had more siblings.

Zuko looked to Niwa. “Chen isn’t his name.”

Becoming rigid, Niwa braced herself for more information.

“How do you know?”

Zuko felt a twist in his heart, almost as though he was cursing her with this knowledge she hasn’t asked for. “Because your children’s father is also my father; and my sister’s father.”

Niwa held tight to Chiyo. If her the man in her life was the father of the current Fire Lord, then…

The air escaped Niwa’s lungs as she stumbled back, holding onto the counter; out of her mouth escaped his true name: “Ozai”.

****

The door to the shed slammed open. Hanging on the walls were multiple hides, furs, and horns that had been harvested from the game in the woods.

Azula had no more tremble in her. Now she was painfully still as she loomed in the doorway. Ozai looked up as he quartered the jackalope for cooking.

He didn’t cower.

Azula walked inside, her eyes darkened with hatred as she approached his work table.

“I think you’ll like jackalope,” Ozai said. “It’s robust and sweet; but it takes a good hand to cook it or else it gets tough. It’s not as forgiving as komodo chicken.”

“I’m not here to talk about the stupid jackalope,” Azula grumbled. Ozai continued working.

“I figured. I just thought I might make conversation. Did you speak to Niwa?”

“Niwa? Your perfect little happy ending? With your perfect little babies?”

Ozai didn’t speak as he masterfully carved silverskin from a slab of meat.

Azula’s hands became fists. “It must be nice to just forget everyone you hurt when-”

“You think I forgot you and your brother?”

“You left!”

“You left me in that prison.”

“You were going to destroy the Earth Kingdom!”

“And you were going to be Fire Lord under my rule.”

“You used me.”

“You’re my child. I was giving your instructions.”

“You were going to make a CHILD the Fire Lord!”

“Funny… Zuko is only two years older than you and he’s Fire Lord. By the way, how is your uncle?”

“Don’t change the subject. Uncle has nothing to do with this.”

Ozai dunked a cleaver into a pot of water. He wiped his hands on a towel as he looked towards Azula as she continued. “You left your cell and found a whole new family.”

Ozai sighed, slinging the towel over his shoulder.

“You’re right. I did.”

Azula’s eyes flared, and she rushed forward to pin Ozai against the wall, multiple horns and antlers clattering down onto the floor.

“WHY WEREN’T WE GOOD ENOUGH?!” Azula screamed. “WHY WEREN’T-”

“I LEFT BECAUSE EITHER I DIED IN THAT CELL AS OZAI OR I DIED A DIFFERENT MAN.”

Azula’s screams withered. She stared at Ozai as he finally showed an emotion beyond indifference.

“I never meant to find what I have. I never set out to replace you and Zuko. That’s not the point of my life now. Niwa found me, and I… I had planned on leaving. I had planned on learning how to hunt and gather effectively before I struck back out on my own. But it… never happened.”

Azula’s grip on Ozai’s collar loosened.

Ozai felt the hand that had scarred Zuko tingle.

“… I found a life beyond the one that I carved from my desire to appease my father.”

Azula stepped back. Ozai finally looked to his daughter.

“What I felt the moment Chiyo was born, when my hands brought her into this world and all I wanted to do was protect her… it’s what I should have felt for you and Zuko. Back then I wanted to be a good father; but now I know that my own definition of a good father back then was something I never want to be again.”

Ozai stood up straight, ready to make his case known.

“Azula; I’m sorry.”

The words struck Azula’s heart like bramble.

“I’m sorry that I… I put so much pain and fear onto you. I owe you and your brother more words than I can ever say, and yet words don’t matter for what I’ve done. I’m sorry.”

Azula glowered at the former Fire Lord as he poured his heart out. She was all too aware of his false words to be convinced.

“I don’t forgive you,” she seethed.

Ozai’s expression remained neutral; he did his best to blink away the small, dewy tears forming on his eyelashes.

“A wise choice,” he said, his voice pitifully rough with the emotion he couldn’t hide. Azula watched as he returned to butchering the jackalope.

“I’m getting Zuko and we’re leaving,” Azula said. “We’re not staying for dinner, we’re not going to play nice. Whatever this is… I hope Niwa wakes up and realizes the mistake she’s made. I hope she takes those kids far away from you.”

The knife in Ozai’s hand finally fumbled as Azula spoke. He took a deep breath, letting her speak.

“And I hope everyone you meet from here on out sees you for who and what you truly are. A sad, pathetic excuse for a man.”

The silence that fell between them was nearly as suffocating as when Azula spit her barbed words. Ozai continued his chore as Azula turned away to leave.

But the door opened before she could reach it. Niwa stood, staring inside as Ozai peered up to her.

He could tell something was wrong.

“Niwa?” He asked. She stepped inside, looking at Azula.

“I’m sorry, may I speak with him in private?”

Azula shrugged. “You can do whatever you want with him. I’m getting my brother and leaving.”

“Wait, please-” Niwa reached for Azula but the princess avoided the woman’s grasp.

“Ask him. Ask him why we’re here-”

“I don’t have to.” Niwa said, looking at Ozai. “Your brother already told me.”

Finally Ozai’s calm shell fractured. He froze, looking at Niwa, who’s lips trembled. She opened her mouth to speak; a moment passed before she could find her voice.

“I’d had a feeling that my children were not your first, Ozai. But I could never really justify asking you such a personal question; even after all these years.”

Azula blinked; she stared at Niwa as Ozai realized he was caught.

Ozai cleared his throat. “… So now you know.”

Niwa’s eyes flooded with tears. “Your son’s eye.”

A painful silence passed before Ozai gripped the wrist of the hand that had caused that burn. “… Yes. I did that.”

But how? Niwa looked at Ozai, having seen what she believed to be every side of him over the past seven years. How he had cared for her, tended to her at her most vulnerable, made her believe he only had their childrens’ best interests at heart. How he held Chiyo and Katsu, and the ways he spoke to them and how Chiyo found true comfort in entrusting her father with her protection’; how Katsu was now beginning to recognize his father’s voice and had started to smile when he heard him.

But now she was learning that her childrens’ father was a man who continued the horrors of his fathers, passing all of that fear and hatred and pain onto his own older children.

“You told me your name was Chen. How long were you going to lie to me?”

“I never meant for it to be a lie,” Ozai quickly explained. “I… I was never expecting this to become my life.”

“… Are you happy here?”

“Niwa, of course I am. We have all of this, each other, our children; Niwa I’ve kept the name because I… I don’t… I’m no longer Ozai.”

“Camelephant dung,” Azula hissed. “Don’t even-”

“I’m not. That man is dead. I would bury him myself if I could.”

Niwa wrung her hands together. Ozai stepped forward.

“I would never hurt you, Niwa.”

Trembling, the woman looked up to him, unsure of what to believe. She opened her mouth-

“Chiyo! Chiyo!!”

The three in the shed jumped, turning towards the house as Zuko rushed along the path leading to the woods. Niwa bolted towards the Fire Lord, followed by Azula and Ozai.

“What happening?!” Niwa asked. Zuko pointed into the woods.

“Chiyo came outside to check on you, but then I saw her run into the woods; at first I didn’t think much of it since I’m sure she’s familiar here and I didn’t want to leave Katsu alone, but-”

Zuko pointed, and billowing from the trees was a ghastly blue mist.

****

Niwa wasted no time running into the wooded area to try and find her daughter - but just as soon as she ran inside, she came tumbling back into the clearing from between another set of trees. She realized what had happened and she darted back into the mist, only to emerge elsewhere in the clearing. She began to panic.

“Chiyo!!” She screamed as Ozai rushed to her. “Chiyo where are you?!”

No answer came, and Niwa turned to Ozai. “What… What are we going to do?!”

“Remain calm,” Ozai said, but Niwa’s fear quickly devolved into anger.

“You want ME to be calm RIGHT NOW, OZAI?!”

Ozai winced, getting used to hearing her say his real name. Zuko approached them, kneeling down to get a look at the mist.

“I’m guessing this isn’t a regular occurrence,” he said, watching the tendrils of smoke wisp around his hand.

“It’s not; this is the first time I’ve seen this,” Niwa said. Azula approached her, for once looking at her without the judgment of her father placed upon her.

“Do you have anything like a messenger hawk? It could fly above the trees.”

“It could, but how is anyone going to get through?” Niwa asked. Azula smiled.

“Again, they’re going to go over the trees.”

Niwa, confused, looked to Zuko, who smiled.

The town may have been a three-days trip on foot, but on an air bison, it was heavily reduced to twenty minutes. When Zuko and Azula had received information on the potential whereabouts of their father, it was Avatar Aang, along with his fiancee Katara, who had dropped them off and mentioned they would be back at nightfall if they hadn’t heard anything. Niwa offered parchment and a brush for Zuko to write to his friends.

Ozai appeared… nervous, to say the least, at the aspect of seeing the avatar again.

But at the rate things were going, it was possible that the only person who could fix quickly this was Aang.

The hawk took flight in the full, bright sunlight of the afternoon, and arrived as daylight became rustic and golden. The hawk was intercepted, and the letter was delivered to where the Avatar was staying - which wasn’t hard to find, as Appa was happily munching on some hay just outside of the parlor of an inn where Aang was conversing with the townspeople.

“Avatar Aang,” the delivery man greeted, “I have correspondence for you.”

Aang blinked, looking to Katara. “How does anyone know I’m here?” He asked, just as he unfurled the parchment. “Oh; it’s from Zuko.”

“Is everything alright?” Katara asked, immediately standing. Aang’s eyes continued to scroll through the letter.

“We need to go.”

Katara did her best to peel Aang away from his audience as quickly as she could. Within moments they were up in the air as the wind sifted through Appa’s fur. Katara scanned Zuko’s letter.

“Of all days for a spirit to show up,” she said.

“Good thing we stayed!” Aang smiled as they breezed through the atmosphere. They watched the forest canopy below them zoom by, and Aang shuddered.

“Yeah; something big is going on in there.”

“Look!” Katara pointed towards the mist streaking through the gaps of the leaves. “It’s some kind of smoke…”

“Let’s touch base with Zuko and Azula,” Aang said, flicking at Appa’s reigns to signal that they needed to hurry. Appa growled and quickened his pace, soon leading them to the small clearing where they’d dropped the royals off. They crested over the trees, seeing a small audience awaiting them.

As Appa landed, Aang and Katara joined Zuko and Azula, where a distressed Niwa’s fears were being subdued.

“Niwa,” Zuko started, “These are my friends, Avatar Aang and Master Waterbender Katara.”

Niwa sighed. “The Avatar, I can’t believe how lucky I am. I suppose being related to the Fire Lord has it’s perks?”

Aang looked at Katara, then to Zuko. “Related?” He asked. Zuko smiled nervously.

“So uhh; I need to tell you guys something.”

Azula peeked out from behind Zuko. “Our dad’s here.”

“O-Ozai?! Where? Is he the reason this is happening?!”

Niwa quickly intervened to quell the Avatar’s own worries. “No, no it’s not him! Please, my daughter; she’s lost in the mist!”

Katara maintained a hand on her waterskin. “Ma’am if Ozai is here then we need to consider him a threat; he escaped prison years ago and-”

“He’s my daughter’s father, he is NOT a threat!” Niwa snapped, her voice echoing over the livestock surrounding them.

Aang and Katara looked at Niwa, their jaws slack.

“The woods are usually peaceful. I’ve lived in this space my whole life. It was built and maintained by my great-great grandparents. I have never seen a spirit in my whole life. But for Chiyo to just run into the mist? I’m so worried; I’ve never had anything like this happen before.”

Aang heard the door to the house close. He became rigid as he recognized the form exiting the home.

Ozai.

The former Fire Lord walked down the path, holding something strapped to his chest. He noticed Aang, and even his own stride faltered.

Niwa turned to him. “Ozai! The Avatar is… Oh.”

It hit her that they had met.

Still, Ozai walked forward with Katsu wrapped against his chest. He looked at the younger man, now much taller. Nearly reaching Ozai’s own height.

“Avatar Aang,” he said. “If anyone can help, it’s you.”

Gripping his staff, Aang’s face darkened. “You’re lucky it’s a kid in there and not you,” he said, suddenly taken back by the fact that there was an infant strapped to Ozai’s chest as Katsu shuffled within the cloth.

Niwa, needing a distraction, took Katsu into her arms, holding him tight as she escorted Aang to the entrance of the forest. Along the way, he noticed some interesting carvings in some of the stones along the path.

“Those are airbender markings,” he said, noticing the swirl patterns. Niwa looked down, smiling.

“My grandfather laid this path after he married my grandmother. She started going blind after an infection, so he made a tactile path leading her around the grounds. Each path has a specific symbol. I didn’t know they were of Airbender origin.”

Aang opened his mouth to mention something, but he remembered there wasn’t much time to talk. Instead, he approached the entrance of the forest.

“I don’t know if any of the landmarks I know will be in there, but if you come across the well, there’s a compass at the base. It will help guide you,” Niwa said.

Ozai approached them, unwrapping the bindings used to hold Katsu. “I want to go.”

“Absolutely not,” Aang spat.

Niwa wrung her hands together as she pleaded. “Please, Avatar?”

“If anyone goes, it’s you,” Aang said.

Ozai frowned. “My son is too small to be without his mother for too long.”

“Can’t you change him?” Aang crossed his arms.

Ozai remained placid. “Of course; but I cannot feed him.”

Aang stuttered. “Maybe I should do this alone either way-”

“Chiyo will not recognize you,” Ozai said.

“Aang.” Zuko’s voice piped up. “I can go with you two.”

Azula stared at her brother in furious horror.

Aang wasn’t happy, but if Zuko was willing to back him up, he agreed to the situation.

“After this, you’re going back to prison, Ozai,” Aang announced. “I’ll see to it myself.”

Ozai looked into the Airbender’s stormy eyes; Aang then slammed his staff into the ground as his eyes and tattoo glowed an ethereal blue. With a wave of his hand, the mist opened, and the three men entered.

****

Azula, Katara and Niwa watched the mist envelop Aang, Zuko and Ozai. Niwa let out a shaky, bated breath as she gently bounced Katsu in her arms.

Katara looked to Azula, who seemed indifferent to the whole thing. Katara could notice the shielded way she stood and held her face - it was like when Katara had been reunited with her own father years ago, and the pain of his absence to fight in the war had resulted in her placing so much orphaned anger upon Hakoda. All of the feelings she didn’t have the time to sort through while helping to take care of the tribe, while traveling with Aang and Sokka and Toph and holding people together, she felt both displaced enough from Hakoda and trusting enough of her father to unload every negative, sour, complicated emotion she’d been harboring for years - and he didn’t push her away. The moment had allowed Katara to become more open with her father after the war, and the two were now on more even grounds than ever.

But a father that was absent for trying to help the world is different from being the soldier child of a man who held the whole war in his hands. Ozai may have only reigned for 6 years, but those 6 years were formative to Zuko and Azula. Sometimes Katara thinks about those months when Zuko chased her and Sokka and Aang, and she’s long-since realized that a parent burning their child for speaking out and then banishing them for an indefinite amount of time was cruelty beyond measure - but back then she was too young to understand, as was Zuko. But Azula herself had no idea the pressures and weights to being Ozai’s blessed favorite. Azula, having prided herself on the stature of Ozai’s talented, preferred child who held the burdens of her father so gracefully on her head, yet her own young mind, no matter how brilliant, couldn’t foresee how Ozai’s teachings would lead to Azula to sequestering herself out of paranoia before challenging Zuko to an Agni Kai while on the cusp of being crowned Fire Lord while Ozai was out demolishing what was soon to be the Old World, reducing it to ash to allow a New World to be reborn.

Katara noticed Azula’s detachment from the situation, and she approached the princess with caution.

“You don’t have to walk on eggshells, Katara,” Azula said without looking at her as she heard the decorative beads on Katara’s clothing rattling upon her presence.

“… I’m sorry. I just wanted to check on you.”

Azula’s face remained neutral, although Katara could see the effort being made to do so. Azula’s crossed arms tightened.

“I’m fine.”

With a nod that meant Katara knew she wasn’t going to get much more out of Azula, she backed away, thus moving to approach Niwa, but not before turning to look at the grounds. The house ahead of them was large, something she would expect to contain an entire family. Several other small buildings surrounded the area, like a shed nearby, a chicken coop, a barn for the lion-rams, every hybrid pig Katara had ever seen, and several ostrich horses. It was a handsome property; bright and colorful with flowers at the base of the mountain, and a ravine that wrapped between the land and said mountain.

Turning back towards Niwa, who bundled Katsu up in the wrapping blanket as twilight approached, Katara was taken back at the image of the woman as she lovingly spoke to her newborn. She also felt immense dread, wondering if this woman knew the extent of what Ozai had done to so many people. What if Chiyo and Katsu were just as doomed as Zuko and Azula? What if Ozai returned to his old ways of pitting his children against each other?

“… Miss Niwa,” Katara began, “how are you doing?”

Niwa sighed, holding Katsu up to her shoulder, gently patting his back. “Better than I was, but still… not knowing is the worst. I’m just… I’m so scared for Chiyo. I trust her knowledge of the woods; she’s played in them so many times before on her own, but this? I’m so scared of what this could do to her.”

Katara nodded. She looked at little Katsu, wondering if maybe he resembled Zuko or Azula when they were that age.

“I can’t help but ask… but… what convinced you to… to be with Ozai?”

Niwa closed her eyes. Azula’s eyes locked onto the other women as she maintained her distance.

“Nothing ‘convinced’ me. I found a man who needed help, thus I helped him. Things happened from there. He told me his name was Chen.”

“He lied to you as well?” Katara asked. Niwa shook her head.

“It’s not… it’s not like that.”

“He did.” Azula seconded. “He lied to you to protect himself. Look where it’s gotten him. A woman who will defend him and two new, perfect little children. Only this time he won’t mess up.”

Niwa’s already strained patience was waning. “You take me for a fool.”

“Oh you bet I do,” Azula scoffed.

Katara did her best to place herself between them, trying to maintain civility. “Let’s not get too riled up. We’re here to make sure Chiyo returns to safety-”

Azula finally stepped forward. “Which means removing Ozai.”

Niwa’s stomach dropped.

Azula maintained her stance. “At all costs.”

“No. I won’t allow it,” Niwa insisted. Azula pointed towards the forest.

“You’re so afraid of losing your children yet you’ll allow that monster near them?!”

“He has never hurt them!” Niwa shouted. Azula doubled down.

“You’ve seen my brother’s eye! He had no problem doing that to him and shoving him off! For THREE YEARS! And he had no problem raising me to believe that what he did to Zuko was justified! The war was one thing, but he pitted me against my family so I believed he was the only one truly on my side, and then what happened? He abandoned me! Do you know how long it’s taken me to understand what actual affection looks like? What it’s meant to feel like when my mother holds me so that I don’t think she’s using that as some kind of emotional bait??”

Katara was quick to act in intercepting Katsu as Niwa’s anger rose. Niwa handed her son to the waterbender as she stalked Azula’s way.

“And I am sorry, Azula. I am so sorry for what you two went through. I can’t imagine all of the pain and horror you must feel reliving what happened.”

“No.” Azula growled. “You can’t. You can’t imagine what it’s like to be so alone-”

“I’ve BEEN alone, Azula. Before I found Ozai I was alone for years! I’ve had family! I had a wonderful family! My grandparents, both of my parents, and guess what? They have all DIED! I have been here because it’s my home; it’s all I have. When I found your father I didn’t think to myself ‘oh look, I wonder if this man is former Fire Lord Ozai and I should leave him for dead’, no! I found an injured man here in a place of little threat and I wanted to help him, because that’s what my homestead is about! I never believed him to be Ozai!”

“Well now that you know, then you’ll understand when we take him back to the Fire Nation.”

Niwa didn’t budge. “Over my dead body.”

Katara stepped back. Azula’s mouth ticked a smile.

“Excuse me?” Azula laughed.

Niwa approached Azula with every word. “Over. My. Dead. Body. You are not taking Ozai. You are not touching him. When your brother and the Avatar return, I am giving you all my thanks in every way I can, but you are not removing him from my life, nor that of my childrens’ lives.”

“He’s a monster!” Azula shouted. Niwa shook her head.

“Azula; if you can change your perceptions, why can’t he?”

Feeling the back of her neck bristle, Azula stood rigid in furious horror.

Katara stood at the ready, holding a baby in one arm and keeping her other hand at her waterskin.

Azula’s lip curled.

“You want him so bad? Fine. Maybe I’ll talk Zuko into building a wall around this forest, so you all can stay locked up and so SO happy together.”

Katara shook her head at Azula, who ignored the waterbender. Niwa, her arms crossed, tilted her head.

“I thought you said you were different? That sounds an awful lot like an old Fire Nation tactic if you ask me.”

Azula’s fists shook. “… I’m… I’m not like that anymore. I’m not like him!”

“I know you’re not Azula; but in the same way, you’ve both changed,” Niwa said. “I just want you to understand that he’s come a long way. Just like you have; and I don’t intend to let him go after I’ve seen the man he’s become. I trust the man he has become. Just like Katara is here with you.”

Azula looked towards Katara. “What are you talking about?”

Niwa continued. “A waterbender here as a friend to the princess of the Fire Nation? After everything you’ve told me? You can change and build new friendships, but he cannot?”

Azula replayed the moment Katara chained her to that grate after besting her during Sozin’s Comet. But she said nothing.

But she didn’t need to as her charged posture diffused, and she stepped back, and away from the argument.

Katara waited and allowed Niwa to turn her way, taking Katsu back into her arms. The waterbender didn’t say anything at first. She knew enough about Ozai to hate him. She’d also once hated Zuko and Azula.

Katara herself was the reason Azula wasn’t crowned as Fire Lord. And yet here they were as… well… maybe not the best of friends, but by now they were on positive terms of acquaintanceship through Zuko, and through Azula’s continued work towards a healthier life. Today had been the darkest turn Azula’s mentality had taken in well over a year, and it worried Katara, but she also understood.

But she couldn’t help but wonder, as she watched Niwa defend Ozai - the man that Katara’s fiance defeated - maybe… if his children had achieved a life beyond the goals of the old Fire Nation… maybe Ozai had achieved that too.

Katara listened to Niwa talk to Katsu as he cooed.

“Don’t worry; daddy will be home soon with sissy. I promise,” she said, stroking her son’s wispy hair.

****

“Chiyo!!” Aang called out. “Chiyo where are you?!”

“Chiyo!” Ozai shouted, following Aang’s voice. “Come on! Let’s go home!”

Zuko felt something in the pit of his stomach as Ozai said that.

“Zuko, Azula! It’s time to go home!” Ozai would call as their feet were coated with sand and saltwater, and as they begged for more time to keep constructing their lopsided palace on the beach.

Zuko looked at his father’s expression as he waited to hear Chiyo’s voice. The concern knitted in his brow was something Zuko had never seen - or at least if he had seen it, time hadn’t done the memory much justice.

“Does she come out here often?” Aang asked. Ozai nodded.

“These woods have been peaceful since before Niwa’s time, from what I understand. Chiyo has played in here for hours on end without problem. I taught her how to swim in the fishing pond up ahead.”

Aang looked towards Zuko, who maintained a visage of neutrality. The Avatar fell back a bit, walking next to Ozai.

“… So Niwa found you in this forest?”

“That’s what she’s told me,” Ozai said. “I was traveling at night, through a forest near where we fought. Next I remember I was waking up in her home.”

Aang listened to the atmosphere around him. “There’s a lot of uncertainty around here. When we flew over, I could sense a large cluster of spirits.”

Ozai hummed; Aang could hear the concern laced within it. “I’ve always figured this place had… something within it. For as long as it’s been peaceful, even at night, I guess I rationalized it as some form of… guardian. Maybe I was wrong.”

“I don’t think that’s wrong, necessarily,” Aang said. “But, if there’s some kind of guardian, it’s being overpowered right now; and it feels angry.”

Zuko’s hands became fists, but not out of his own anger. “… You don’t think it’s here because of Azula and me, do you?”

Aang looked back, shrugging. “Spirits can follow emotions and intentions. I… I suppose it’s possible.”

Zuko felt a weight in his gut. He looked towards Ozai, who didn’t look back to Zuko.

Old fears resurfaced for Zuko; he hadn’t felt this wave of uncertainty around Ozai in years.

“Ah; there it is,” Ozai said as they approached the well. Aang stopped, getting a good look at it’s construction.

“That…that looks like one of the wells back at the temples.”

First the carvings in the rocks, and now the well’s architecture. Aang touched the stone, impressed with the craftsmanship.

Ozai looked out to the different branches that splintered off from the clearing. “Chiyo!”

Aang looked up from inspecting the well to look at Zuko. The young Fire Lord watched his father shout for his child, able to maintain a poise he once never thought possible as he yearned for scraps of his father’s approval. But he also felt guilty for potentially leading to this search.

“Dad,” Zuko’s voice broke through the ringing silence when no one answered his call. Ozai looked at his eldest child as he reached out, hesitating, but he still managed to touch Ozai’s shoulder. “We’ll find her. I promise.”

Ozai regarded Zuko with an air of surprise. The son who once told Ozai to his face that he was abandoning everything their family stood for and trained the Avatar in the ways of firebending just to dethrone his father was there helping him find a part of his ‘new family’.

The older man could see how much Zuko was truly beginning to resemble him, and it made his stomach turn as he remembered how much suffering he put upon Zuko for his supposed weaknesses - when those ‘weaknesses’ were traits he had inherited from his father. Traits Ozai wanted stamped out because of that very reason. If he had to let go of all of the tenderness in his heart to succeed in his endeavors, then Zuko had to do the same.

And yet it is Zuko that now sits upon the throne, having heralded a new start with care and compassion the likes the Fire Nation and the world hadn’t seen in a century.

And it took too many years and a new family for him to come to even begin to understand how much of himself he’d never gotten to know by denying himself tenderness with another person.

Ozai finally managed to answer his son by placing his hand over Zuko’s on his shoulder.

“Thank you,” he said, his voice gruff with overflowing memories and feelings. He cleared his throat, looking at Zuko, into his eyes that were no longer wide and pleading and unsure, but were now more sure than even Ozai was these days. He tried to smile for some levity; and for something he didn’t realize was important to say until the events unfolding. “You’ve really… You’re…”

The words couldn’t register You’re a good kid? You’ve come a long way? How so? The man who had bucked the mould Ozai tried to fit him into was now something completely different indeed. Would telling him he’d grown into a good man even mean something coming from Ozai?

Instead, Zuko offered another smile.

“It’s alright. We can talk about it later.”

Aang watched from behind, unsure as Zuko walked ahead.

“Aang,” Zuko said, “Can you sense anything from here?”

Aang closed his eyes, opening them as they began to glow. He slammed a hand onto the ground, and a glow of energy burst through the grass that only he could see. Zuko and Ozai stumbled back as the gust of wind nearly knocked them over, but Aang, as his eyes dimmed, pointed to a spot towards the north; as the glow dissipated, he found a set of small footprints.

“There! She’s gone north!”

But just as they prepared to take off, Ozai felt something grab his ankle. He fell onto his stomach as he was dragged backwards. Zuko turned to see his father being pulled by something he couldn’t see - while Aang saw a translucent hand reaching out, pulling Ozai away. A spirit that was hiding in the well was the culprit.

“We’ve found him!”

A cavalcade of noise deafened Aang; Zuko watched his friend try to block his ears as he winced.

“Justice!”

“Justice for our lands!”

“Praise to the Avatar for leading us here!”

“Now we need to remove the woman and the other parasite; then this land will be ours.”

Zuko rushed forward, grabbing Ozai’s hands to keep him from being dragged into the well. The two latched onto each other, and Zuko, for once, witnessed primal fear in his father’s eyes.

Aang found his clarity through the noise; he also darted towards the well, pulling Ozai out of the grip of the spirit.

“Avatar!!” It screeched. “Let us take this beast from this world!”

“No!” Aang shouted. “This isn’t the right way!”

“Your way didn’t work! Your human justice led him back here to infest this land!”

Aang and Zuko managed to pull Ozai to safety, and Aang created a barrier of spiritual energy around them.

“What is it you want?” Aang shouted. The spirits howled and screeched.

“On the day the comet painted the sky crimson, the Fire Lord set ablaze to our homes!”

“We have wandered countless eves since!”

“We nearly rid ourselves of him years ago! When we came across him wandering, just like us! We forced him to feel our rage! Our pain!”

“We have been trying to find him since, but something has kept us from entering this forest.”

“But we have managed to distract it by luring the older of the parasite’s children into the forest; He is busy keeping It safe.”

Aang, confused, looked around as the clearing continued to darken with encroaching spirits. “He?”

“His spirit feels much like yours. But regardless, Avatar. We are ready for our justice!”

“This isn’t justice!” Aang shouted. Behind him, Zuko helped Ozai to his feet. “This is revenge! And revenge only begets more revenge and bloodshed!”

“PERHAPS BLOOD IS WHAT WE WANT!”

As the sun set, the trees began to sway as the spirits convened, and they amassed together to create an amalgamation of rage and desolation, appearing in the form of a massive, armored spidersnake.

****

She turned towards the burst of energy that had erupted towards the south.

The other with her, carrying a lantern that glowed with a hazy, white fire, hummed to himself.

“Did you feel that, Chiyo?” He asked, looking at the small girl. She nodded, not looking to him; instead he watched her face where the energy was coming from, her little form frightened, but not shying away from the predicament. “He is here as well… I should go say my hellos. It’s been a hundred years, after all.”

Chiyo looked up to the older man, able to see the grass through his non-corporeal form; but after all this time of knowing him nothing about him frightened her.

“What happens if I don’t know what to do?”

“It’s alright, Chiyo. You won’t be alone. But we must make haste. Don’t worry. I will be right by your side.”

Beyond the trees, they could hear the screech of the spirits as they engaged in a heated confrontation with the Avatar, the Fire Lord, and the man responsible for displacing them.

“AVATAR! YOU WOULD DEFEND THIS BEAST? AFTER YOU PROMISED HE COULD DO LONGER CAUSE DESTRUCTION?”

Aang dodged one of the spidersnake’s piercing legs as it jammed into the ground.

Aang faltered with an answer as he landed on one of the spirit’s legs.

“I won’t stand for acting on vengeance when the other hasn’t committed any other crimes!”

“HE IS COMMITTING A CRIME BY BEING HERE! YOUR MORTAL SENTENCING DID NOT WORK! YOU ALLOWED THIS CREATURE TO ESCAPE HIS CONFINES AND INVADE OUR LANDS! AGAIN!”

Ozai dodged one of the legs as it prepared to slice him upon impact.

“Let me speak!”

“IT WILL ALL BE LIES!”

Another leg stabbed the ground. Ozai looked towards Zuko, who was unsheathing his swords; even as a master firebender, he found comfort in bringing these weapons along with him.

He turned towards Ozai.

“Dad!” He shouted, tossing one of the swords Ozai’s way.

“YOU WOULD CAUSE MORE BLOODSHED!!”

“Just the same as you!” Ozai barked. Aang, from up high, began to panic, and he descended towards the others.

“No! Wait this isn’t the way!”

“Then what do you want us to do?!” Zuko hissed as he tried to keep his eyes on the massive spirit.

Ozai lashed out, slashing at a leg that passed by them, trying to stab it where the armor was weak.

“OZAI!” Aang shouted.

“WHAT?! MY FAMILY IS IN DANGER!”

“THIS HAPPENED BECAUSE OF YOU!”

“I’M WELL AWARE OF THAT!”

“YOU CAN’T KEEP TRYING TO USE VIOLENCE, IT WON’T SOLVE ANYTHING!”

Ozai glowered at Aang. “Really? Maybe you should have killed me when you had the chance, boy. Then maybe this wouldn’t be happening.”

Aang’s mouth bobbed, but he quickly became furious. Zuko looked between the two. He had once insisted to Aang that he would need to kill Ozai; it would be the only way to truly stop him. But Aang didn’t, citing the importance of his heritage and views of mercy. But… Ozai had indeed escaped his prison sentence, and he had returned to the Earth Kingdom, and now the spirits of the lands that were scorched by his fire were seeking their retribution, and an innocent family was in danger.

Well; mostly innocent family. Zuko wouldn’t lie about how he wondered how Niwa could care for his father; how he wondered what kind of man she found within him.

“Zuko! Behind you!”

Aang blasted a gust of air towards the spirit before it could slam a sharp leg down upon Zuko.

“ENOUGH!” The spirit shrieked. It doubled down and charged at Aang, flinging him into the tree canopy. It turned towards Ozai. “You have chosen this land, and thus the bones of you and your family will decorate it!”

Ozai held onto the hilt of the sword with a grip that turned his knuckles white. “You won’t touch my family.”

The spirit cackled. “Oh? Let’s make things interesting.”

A leg slammed down, catching the fabric of Zuko’s tunic. The spirit rounded, tackling Zuko to the ground, and it reared back to bite down into Zuko’s ribs. The Fire Lord screamed as the pincers buried into his abdomen; the poison seared and stung his flesh and exacerbated the wound.

Ozai watched as Zuko howled.

Yet he never called for his father, who was right there.

“Papa!”

But another voice did.

“Mama! Papa!”

Chiyo’s voice was heard over Zuko’s screams.

“ZUKO!” Aang’s voice entered the noise as he returned to the fray; and Ozai once more grabbed the sword Zuko had lent him… Zuko had lent him a means of protection - which Ozai now needed to use for him in return.

“ZUKO!” Ozai screamed along with Aang, and he charged after the spirit. “Avatar! Give me a lift! I’ll-”

“No! I won’t let you kill it!”

“IT’S KILLING ZUKO AS WE SPEAK!”

Aang faltered, but Ozai didn’t. He reeled back and, with all of his might, he sliced through one of the spirit’s legs. It screeched in agony, finally releasing Zuko. Aang was quick to Zuko’s side as the spirit stumbled away from him. Ozai grabbed Zuko’s other sword, slashing at the spidersnake, eagerly cutting any tender part of it’s body.

Zuko fought for air, his mouth rendered dry from the effects of the poison. Aang was quick to pull some water from the well, and with techniques Katara had taught him, he began trying to heal the wound.

“VILE CREATURE! YOU BRING MORE PAIN!” The spirit screamed as Aang heard another leg thud to the ground.

“AVATAR! YOU ALLOW THIS TO HAPPEN! YOUR BLINDNESS AND BIAS LEAD TO MORE DESTRUCTION!”

“No!” Aang cried out. “You chose this path! You have chosen revenge to deal with your pain!”

“MY PAIN BROUGHT ABOUT MERCILESSLY BY ONE OF YOUR OWN HUMANS! I ASK RETRIBUTION AND I RECEIVE PAIN!”

“You threatened me and my family!” Ozai shouted.

The spirit wobbled; seeing no other way to end this scuffle, it’s body rattled with determination.

“Perhaps it should no longer be a threat. You will know my pain.”

Even missing two legs, the spidersnake charged towards the home.

“NO!!” Ozai screamed. He looked towards Aang and Zuko.

“Zuko still isn’t healed!” Aang said. “I’ve removed the poison but-”

Ozai rushed forward, removing his shawl and pressing it against the wound.

Zuko lay bleeding; but Ozai’s family was in danger…

But Zuko was Ozai’s family… As much as neither were ready to admit it in full just yet.

Ozai’s face twisted; his method hadn’t worked. It had only hastened the problem.

“Go, Avatar. Please; help my family.”

Aang nodded, taking to the sky and flying back towards the homestead.

In the enveloping silence, Ozai was panicking; he had to get back, but what about Zuko?

“Zuko; can you hear me?” Ozai asked; gently jostling the Fire Lord. Zuko moaned; the poison had taken every bit of energy out of his body.

“He needs this.”

Ozai jumped as a voice made itself known from behind. A cloaked man… another spirit, judging by the way Ozai could see through him… he offered an herb to Ozai.

“What do I do?” Ozai asked, accepting it.

“Extract the oils with your palms; it will also warm it up, activating it; then apply it to the wrists, throat, chest; it will absorb and help him.”

Ozai quickly took to smashing the herb between his palms; in time creating a medicated-smelling oil, and he began dabbing as instructed.

“Do you know this man?” The spirit asked. Ozai felt how Zuko’s scar had even wrapped around to the back of his neck as he administered the oil.

“…This is my son.”

“I see,” the robed man said. “Quite a nasty scar on his eye.”

Ozai didn’t look back at him; instead he massaged Zuko’s wrists, hoping the herb would take effect soon.

“That must have hurt. Did you find the man who did it?”

Ozai stopped; he looked back to the cloaked man-

Who was gone.

A groan; a grimace.

“Dad?” Zuko asked. Ozai jumped, pulling Zuko to sit up.”What happened? Did we fend it off?”

Ozai shook his head. “No; can you stand?”

“I… I think so.”

“If you can stand, then I can help you.”

****

Aang flew as fast as the currents could take him. He kept tabs on the spirit as it charged towards the homestead; he hoped the others weren’t too close to the entrance of the forest.

He found a strong wind current, and he charged through the sky, able to see the clearing as he bypassed the raging spirit. He crested the canopy, and found Katara, Azula, and Niwa waiting nearby.

“GET OUT OF THE WAY!! GO TOWARDS THE HOUSE!!” Aang screamed; but it wasn’t long until the spirit burst through the trees.

Katara was quick to act, and she used the nearby ravine to create a wall of ice to contain the spirit. Azula shoved Niwa towards the house and ran to join Katara and Aang.

“Where’s Zuko?” Azula asked Aang as he landed.

“He’s in the woods with Ozai-”

“YOU LEFT HIM WITH OZAI?! ALONE?!” Azula screeched as smoked poured from her mouth. Aang winced, but he was distracted by the scraping sounds of the spidersnake’s sharp legs clawing at the ice. Katara continued to add layers of ice to the wall, but the spirit was chipping away too fast for her to keep up.

“It’s going to escape!” She shouted. Aang looked back to Niwa, holding Katsu as she watched in fear, and he bent giant split in the earth to keep the spirit from reaching her. Niwa watched in awe as her land was broken in half, and water from the ravine crashed into the gap.

“Okay,” Katara said, still adding layers of ice. “What’s the plan?”

Aang joined her, also layering on to the wall as Azula joined them at the ready. Aang nervously laughed.

“Uhh that’s a good question.”

“You don’t have a plan?!” Azula asked. Aang pouted at her.

“Oh like you two have been making one while we’ve been in there?!”

Azula pouted back and crossed her arms, remaining silent.

“I don’t want to kill it,” Aang said. “It’s suffered enough; but harming others won’t fix it’s suffering.”

“What does it want?” Katara asked.

“It wants Ozai and his family dead,” Aang said.

Azula hmm’d. “I don’t see the problem with that.”

“Azula!” Katara admonished, but Azula was quick to snap back.

“Do you know what it’s like?! To have gone through so much because of him and suddenly he’s so much happier without you around?!”

Aang helped add another layer to the ice wall as the spirit screamed in frustration.

“I don’t think that’s what happened, Azula.”

“HE NEVER WOULD HAVE HELPED ME IF I WAS IN THIS SITUATION! AND YET HE’S IN THAT FOREST LOOKING FOR HIS NEW PERFECT LITTLE BABY WHILE WE DO ALL OF HIS DIRTY WORK FOR-”

“OZAI STAYED BEHIND BECAUSE ZUKO’S HURT. I’M DOING MY JOB AS THE AVATAR, OZAI IS HELPING YOUR BROTHER.”

Azula went silent, but she appeared as though she could shoot lightning from her eyes.

“Azula,” Aang said; “Would you let a woman endure the pain you felt just to make yourself feel better? I know you wouldn’t; you quit that cycle a long time ago. You have to live it now. And not giving in to the pain you’ve endured sometimes hurts more than the memory of it.”

Azula turned her head, tears in her eyes.

“Think about Kiyi! You have another little sister and brother! If you put that same harm on them, what would that say about everything you’ve learned? And if Ozai has learned how to stop acting out on his own anger, then why be mad at that?”

“Because Zuko and I suffered!”

“But it’s not Niwa’s fault; nor is it Chiyo’s or Katsu’s. Your suffering isn’t your fault,” Aand said, looking at the spirit, “But enacting on that anger to hurt others out of justice… sometimes it’s only revenge; and the cycle continues. And one day they’ll see it as the right thing to keep hurting other. Is that the legacy you want, Azula? After everything you’ve been through?”

For a moment, the only sounds were Katara and Aang adding water to the ice wall to contain the spirit.

Azula took a breath. “So… what should we do with this?” She asked.

Aang looked to Katara. “We can’t just keep holding it… we have to do something to stop it.”

“And at what point do we put it down?” Azula asked, stretching her arms as her hands began to sizzle.

“… We don’t.”

Azula sighed. “Katara he’s impossible.”

Katara smiled towards her fiance. “Yeah; I know.”

The ice finally broke, and the spirit lunged forward. Aang leaped into the air as Katara used the water to skate out of the way. Azula bent a wall of fire to try and herd the spirit away, but it was almost too fast, and it kept up with the blaze as it extended. Azula cursed and focused her powers on her feet, and she burst forward, using her flames to hover and move quickly.

Niwa watched in horror as part of her homestead was lit ablaze. Even from her distance she could feel the heat from the fire. Her livestock bleated and clucked and screeched in fear as she held tight to Katsu.

She wondered why only Aang had returned from the forest; until she saw two figures at the entrance of the trees.

Ozai helped Zuko stumble along, the two of them taking in the sight of battle.

Zuko tried to stand, but he was still too weak. Ozai helped him sit as he he could see Niwa and Katsu were safe.

But there was still no sign of Chiyo.

Holding tight to Zuko’s swords, Ozai pondered his best course of action.

“Dad,” Zuko said, and Ozai knelt down to listen. “You should go back in and try to find Chiyo while it’s distracted.”

Ozai stared at him. “And leave you here?”

Zuko laughed. “It wouldn’t be the first time. I’ll be fine.”

The words stung Ozai, but he was right.

“Besides,” Zuko said, “I’m a better solo fighter.”

“And yet you’re here with all of these people who care about you,” Ozai said.

Zuko smirked. “I lucked out. They helped me realize how much worth I had when I was blind to it.”

Ozai’s throat tightened. “I’ve… gone through a similar situation recently.” Ozai said. “I just didn’t realize it until today.”

Zuko shook his head, weakly pushing his father.

“Then go; go find her,” he said. Ozai stood, and Zuko gripped Ozai’s hand on one of the swords, ensuring he had a good hold on the hilt. “Don’t fail another one of your kids. Or I’ll make sure you see that prison cell again.”

Ozai nodded. “As his majesty commands.”

Ozai rushed back into the woods, and Zuko weakly tried to stand, but his legs weren’t strong enough. His presence caught the eye of Katara.

“ZUKO!” She shouted, skating his way with her water ribbon. She landed in front of him and crouched down. “Where is it?” She asked, preparing her water as he showed her the wound. She was quick to begin healing it as he wrapped an arm around her for support.

“I told dad to go back in and look for Chiyo while you have the spirit distracted.”

“You haven’t found her yet?”

“No. I’m starting to worry.”

“… Do you think he’ll find her?”

Zuko looked back to the fight raging in front of him. “I want to hope so; for all our sakes. I don’t want to think of my father’s bloodlust going against this spirit’s. If we led this thing here and something’s happened to Chiyo, I don’t think we’ll have seen the last of my father’s anger.”

****

He raced through the woods, feeling a panic he wasn’t used to. Even when Chiyo and Katsu had been born, he wasn’t this afraid.

Only upon seeing Zuko and Azula and the reflections of the man he used to be, and now Chiyo’s sudden disappearance did Ozai feel his eyes grow hot with tears as his frustration built.

So many emotions seemed to pile on top of each other, one after another.

Perhaps he wasn’t meant to be a father; he was barely even a good son. But he tried so hard…

‘All I wanted was for you, my father, to love me!’

Zuko’s words pierced his mind, as did the image of Azulon’s emotionless face.

Ozai shook his head and he continued back down the path.

“CHIYO!” He screamed.

What if he never found her? What if she was gone?

‘Spirits can follow emotions and intentions-”

Aang’s answer to Zuko’s question earlier rang in his mind. Ozai had displaced those spirits… if they’d arrived following any animosity from Zuko or Azula, or even following the Avatar’s power…

‘I’ve taken away your bending-”

Ozai’s defeat at the hands of Aang had caused him so much grief… and yet his time here with Niwa, away from the palace, away from the place that had created his anger and self-loathing… She had given him something new.

The early days when she expected nothing back from him for saving him, and he stayed because he just… didn’t have anything left. But he did find her. And soon they had each other. He often found himself thinking about Ursa; and the guilt he buried to keep himself sane.

And then Chiyo was born; the physical manifestation of his new life as Chen, as Niwa’s other half. Years ago, Ozai waited for his children’s arrivals from a distance as Ursa was confined to special quarters. He was then fetched to be brought to his tired wife and a clean, swaddled baby, to which he was pleased; and yet Chen helped to guide his children into the world, containing his composure in contrast to the work and pain Niwa endured. His hands - the hands that shaped, raised and burned everything from the world around him, including his own children, now delivered new life.

It didn’t hit him until a moment passed after Chiyo’s birth and she hadn’t made a sound, until she finally began to wail. That sigh of relief Ozai breathed was something he hadn’t forgotten. The way Niwa smiled as she gathered up their daughter into her arms.

The way Ozai felt compelled, hours later, to take Chiyo outside; all clean and bundled and happy with her first meal, as he introduced her to her home; his own new home. How he told her it may not seem much at first, but it had welcomed him and had helped him become a new man, and now how Chiyo was just as welcome to this new home; as she was created by a land that brought two souls together.

“CHIYO!!” Ozai shouted, his heart feeling the strain with the passing of the hours full of worry.

But thankfully-

“Papa!”

Ozai whipped around, hearing the voice. He heard some foliage rustle, and clamoring out from behind a lilac bush was Chiyo as she ran into her father’s arms.

“Papa!!” She cried as Ozai fell to his knees. “Papa I’m sorry!”

Ozai kissed her forehead. “It’s alright, rosebud. I’m just glad you’re safe.”

“I didn’t m-mean for al-all of this to h-hap-ppen,” Chiyo sobbed. Ozai looked to her in confusion.

“What do you mean?”

A soft glow rounded the lilac bush, and Ozai saw the robed man from earlier, holding a lantern flickering with an eerie-white flame.

“You,” he said. The spirit smiled, approaching them before he knelt down.

“I’m happy that you’ve finally found each other. Chen, or… I suppose Ozai… I’m afraid I’m the one that may have set things into motion today,” he said. Ozai stared at him.

“Who are you?”

The robed spirit chuckled. “I’m actually an old acquaintance of Avatar Aang’s. My name is Khospa.”

Ozai’s jaw went slack. “You’re Niwa’s grandfather.”

Chiyo sniffled, wiping her nose with her sleeve. “I got scared earlier when that lady kept getting angry. I saw Grandpa Khospa in the woods and wanted to talk to someone. He always gives good advice,” she said, reaching out to let Khospa take her hand as he chuckled.

Ozai’s eyes widened.

“Always? Wait… this isn’t the first time you two have spoken?”

“No,” Chiyo said, finally smiling. “Grandpa Khospa helps me find mushrooms and the best berries! and told me I’d be a good big sister!”

Ozai remembered when Chiyo was a little less than optimistic when she learned about Katsu’s impending arrival; then one day she started proclaiming about how she was going to be the best big sister.

Khospa chuckled. “She can be a little spitfire at times, eh?”

Ozai smiled, unable to hold back his relief.

“But I think she’s ready to tell you something, right Chiyo?”

Ozai looked between the two, and Chiyo, nervous, held tight to Ozai’s collar as she leaned in to whisper something in his ear.

His slackened jaw almost hit the ground.

“You can… you can what?”

The sounds of a shriek pierced the night. Ozai jumped as he recalled what was happening outside of the forest.

Chiyo wriggled out of Ozai’s grip.

“Come on, Papa! We have to go help them! I have to help Aang!”

“I will help you find your way out,” Khospa said, holding his lantern out to guide them out of the forest. Chiyo eagerly held tight to her father’s hand as they rushed through the woods.

Ozai, looking down at Chiyo and her determination, now felt more strongly than ever about returning to find Zuko and Azula - and to ensure their safety.

Zuko who, as of right now, had been healed in full by Katara. He stood, still wobbly, but he no longer ached as he stretched in anticipation of fighting. In the distance, Aang and Azula had kept the spirit contained by dodging it’s advances and using their elements to herd it away from each other.

“We can’t just keep making it go in circles,” Katara said. “But Aang wants it to stay alive.”

“It’s angry. I just don’t know how we can quell it’s anger in a way that will satisfy it.”

“Zuko!”

Zuko and Katara jumped as Ozai caught up with them. They gasped as they saw Chiyo with him, and Zuko smiled. “Hey Chiyo! You’re back!”

Nodding, Chiyo looked out to the great spirit as it fought.

“Look, Chiyo,” Khospa said, pointing to Aang. “There he is. I think he could use your help.”

Nodding, Chiyo rushed forward much to Zuko and Azula’s horror as Ozai ran after her.

“Chiyo wait!” Zuko shouted.

“It’s not safe for you!” Katara insisted. “Ozai stop her!”

“I can’t,” Ozai said. “This has to happen.”

Chiyo approached the spirit, and Aang, floating above, watched in horror as the spirit caught her in its sights. It turned towards her, and Chiyo stood still, but not out of fear.

Zuko screamed at Ozai to intervene; Katara readied her waterbending-

But just as the spirit reeled a leg back to smash down upon Chiyo-

A gust of air rustled around her clothes, and she leapt into the air, high, high up… until she was face to face with Aang as the spirit’s claw came crashing into the ground.

Ozai watched, unbelieving, as his daughter took to the sky; Zuko and Katara’s shouts went silent.

Aang, wide-eyed watched this little girl hover for a moment as their wind currents collided. She smiled at him.

“You’re… You’re a…” Aang’s throat was dry.

“Avatar Aang!” Chiyo grinned. “My Grandpa Khospa says hi!”

“Khospa?” Aang echoed. He looked towards the entrance of the woods, where a figure stood with a lantern.

The memory of an Air Nomad, still struggling to get his tattoos, but was a beloved shepherd of young airbenders, came to his mind.

“Khospa?!”

“ENOUGH!” The spirit screamed. It reared back on it’s snake body to reach upwards, flailing it’s legs towards Aang and Chiyo, who fell back down to the ground. Aang caught himself, but Chiyo was poised to land - until Azula made a grab for her little sister, who knocked the wind out of the older princess as she slammed down. Chiyo looked to see Azula and she smiled nervously.

“Thanks, lady.”

Azula pushed her off without hesitation. “Just what we need, another cloud-brained airbender.”

With a screech, the spirit prepared to strike again, but Chiyo stood to join Aang as she poised herself against the beast.

“HOW DO YOU FEEL, LITTLE ONE? TO KNOW I WILL DECORATE THIS LAND WITH YOUR FLESH?!”

Chiyo didn’t let her nervousness invade her mind; she’d seen spirits before, but this was the angriest one she’d ever met.

She stepped forward, her hands clasped together. “Why are you mad?”

“I HAVE NO HOME. YOUR FATHER SAW TO THAT MANY YEARS AGO.”

Chiyo turned to look at Ozai, who closed his eyes out of shame.

“Papa, is that true?”

Ozai looked to her, and he nodded.

“It is true. This… isn’t the worst thing I’ve ever done. I’ve committed many wrongs. Against this spirit, the world… your brother and sister.”

Azula and Zuko looked to each other as Ozai spoke.

Chiyo turned back to the spirit. “What is it that you want?”

“YOUR HOME IN RETURN. WE SHALL CLEANSE THE LAND OF THOSE WHO LIVE HERE AND MAKE IT OUR OWN!”

“You don’t have to do that!” Chiyo begged. She stepped forward as Ozai and the others made grabs for her to not step too close. “If you need a home, we are more than willing to let you live on this land.”

“WE WANT VENGEANCE!”

“Your anger is justified! But I can’t let you harm my family, or anyone else. But I can let you choose to live here. I don’t want you to suffer; but I don’t want anyone else to suffer. Please?”

The spirit looked upon Chiyo; and without warning, it reeled back to strike down upon her with it’s piercing leg. The others shouted, ready to remove her, but Chiyo didn’t budge; and just as she was about to be skewered-

The claw halted, just inches from her face.

Chiyo reached out to touch the armored claw, and the spirit shuddered.

“It’s okay,” she said. “You’re safe here; you can make this place your home, and you’ll always be safe. I trust you.”

The spirit trembled.

Aang stepped forward. “You have my word. You have his word as well, right Ozai?”

The spirit looked to Ozai, as he looked an absolute wreck as he watched Chiyo’s actions; but he and the spirit locked eyes.

“My Niwa opened this land to me when I needed a home. I took yours away; I now invite you to stay here, and make this land your own; with one condition.”

“… And what is that?”

Ozai placed his hand on his daughter’s hair. “That if you find anyone that is lost, you protect them. Beyond that, you’ll find Khospa; he will be glad to keep you all company.”

The Spidersnake backed away, and upon multiple parts of it’s body, light began to shine. The spirit allowed itself to come apart, and countless streams of light burst into the air, descending down into the ground, where the battered earth regenerated. Grass regrew and flowers burst forth.

“Thank you… ” They heard the whispers of thousands of voices. “I will abide by your condition, so long as you keep your own promise, and maintain the earth around you.”

Ozai looked to Aang. “I promise.”

Aang closed his eyes, passing the message along in spirit; and a cool breeze rustled the trees, playing melodies from nearby windchimes.

****

Niwa watched Aang return her land to one piece as Katara redirected the water that rose with the slab of earth. Niwa then rushed forward, holding Katsu tight as she embraced Chiyo.

“Oh Chiyo! Sweetheart!” She cried out, pulling her daughter into a tight bearhug. Chiyo hugged her mother back, eager to return the embrace.

Ozai watched them, and he tried to not be obvious as he turned to look at Zuko and Azula. Zuko sat on the ground, exhausted after his injury as Azula was staring Niwa’s way. She made eye contact with her father, and Ozai could almost feel the searing heat of her glare; he turned back towards the family in front of him.

“Mama, we kind of invited some people to stay in the woods.”

Ozai chuckled. He knelt down and looked to Niwa. “Well… we both did. But Chiyo did most of the talking. All that spiritual Airbender stuff, you know?”

Niwa still couldn’t believe it. “My baby is an Airbender.”

Chiyo nodded. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier. I was… kind of scared.”

Niwa held her daughter’s hands like lifelines. “Oh baby; I’m so sorry if there’s ever been anything I’ve done to make you scared about telling me this.”

Chiyo, however, shook her head. “It wasn’t you. I guess I just got scared about it in general; there aren’t a lot of Airbenders so I thought maybe something was wrong with me. But then I met Grandpa Khospa! He helped me, and he told me he was one too!”

Niwa’s jaw dropped. “You… you’ve seen Grandpa Khospa?”

“Yeah, and he’s real funny! He helped me stay safe from the spirits today.”

Niwa looked up to Ozai, and he nodded that she was telling the truth.

“He’s actually over there, talking to Aang! They lived in the same temple!” Chiyo said, pointing towards the entrance of the forest. She could see Aang heading that way to greet Khospa. She couldn’t believe what she was looking at.

Ozai touched Niwa’s shoulder. “You should go see him.”

Niwa’s eyes glossed over, and she held Katsu tight before Ozai gently relinquished her grip of the boy, cradling him against his chest. Ozai stroked her cheek, and she answered with a touch on his hand, still looking towards the spirit of her grandfather.

“Go on,” Ozai whispered, finally convincing her to go.

As Niwa slowly made her way over, she could see Aang and Khospa strike up their conversation.

“It’s good to see you, Aang.”

With happy, but tearful eyes, Aang looked upon Khospa, unable to believe he was with one of his brethren.

“Khospa; I can’t believe it! But… you’re so old… I mean you’re- you’re dead but… look how old you got!”

Khospa laughed a raspy, hearty chuckle. “I… I was lucky. I managed to escape just as we noticed the Fire Nation descending upon us. I was using my glider at the time, so I had a means to escape. I tried to get my bison, Kooka… but she had been…” Khospa shook his head, overcome with emotion.

Aang’s heart dropped, remembering Kooka, a sweet, apple-driven bison, who was the sister of Appa’s mother. She was beloved by weavers as her fur was one of the softest of all of the bison; her fluff was worn by countless Air Nomads.

Khospa cleared his throat and continued: “But… I was still able to escape. I hid in the Earth Kingdom and made a new life. I joined the army, but had to hide my Airbending, or risk being found by the Fire Nation. Unfortunately I lost one of my legs, and couldn’t fight anymore. That was when I met my wife, who’s family lived here and maintained this homestead. It used to be a whole community; but the war took it’s toll,” he sighed heavily, looking upon the still-beautiful land. “I took to the Spirit World before my death so I could be with this land, and my descendants.”

“I’m so sorry, Khospa. I shouldn’t have run away… I should have been there when the Fire Nation attacked.”

“Aang… I’m not sure there would have been much you could have done. You were so young, let alone untrained.”

“I could have done something!”

“And what if they’d killed you too? Then the world would have had to wait anyway for the Avatar to appear again; and with the way the Fire Nation ravaged the Water Tribes? Aang…”

Aang felt the warmth of Khospa’s ethereal hand rest on his shoulder.

“Aang, you may not be proud of it, and it may not have been a brave decision… but the decision you made saved the world. And you still stood to right your mistakes, and you put an end to what destroyed our people.”

Aang smiled, wiping his eyes.

“Thanks, Khospa.”

With an embrace, Aang felt so much of the guilt that he had been carrying begin to ease. He noticed Khospa look up; Aang turned to find Niwa approaching, wringing her hands together emotionally.

“Hi Grandpa,” she smiled. Khospa beamed.

“Hello, Rosebud.”

As they watched from the field, Chiyo found the courage to approach Zuko and Azula.

“Are you feeling better, Zuko?” Chiyo asked.

Zuko nodded, patting her head. “Yeah. I think I’ll make it.”

Chiyo looked up to Azula, who held her hand out to stop her. “If you want to ask me anything, you will call me Azula. Not lady.”

Zuko leaned forward, whispering to Chiyo. “Call her lady, I’ll vouch for you.”

Chiyo giggled, but she simply regarded Azula with big, stormy eyes. “I… I heard you’re my brother and sister.”

Zuko nodded. Azula made a hand gesture indicating that ‘maybe’ they were siblings as she wobbled her outstretched hand.

“I’m so excited!” Chiyo danced. “I thought all I had was stinky Katsu.”

Azula smirked. “Funny; I used to think the same thing about Zuzu; but then we found out we have another sister on our mom’s side, and now I can actually say I have a favorite sibling,” she grinned.

“Hey!” Zuko feigned a hurt tone. “I’m not stinky.”

“Uhh that time we fought each other after you’d been on the run for weeks? Nasty; you smelled like Uncle”

“And who’s fault was that?!” Zuko shouted. Azula looked over her nails.

“Hmm; couldn’t have been mine.”

Chiyo’s eyes lit up further. “Uncle? I have an uncle?”

Zuko nodded. “You sure do.”

Azula shrugged. “He’s alright.”

“Uhh, he’s the best?” Zuko responded. Azula wrinkled her nose.

“Eh, he’s okay.”

Chiyo turned around. “Papa! I have an uncle!!”

Ozai’s face winced as he wondered what else the kids were telling Chiyo… but who was he to stop them from telling her everything he’d held from her? He turned to see Niwa speaking to Khospa, and he hoped their conversation was everything she’d needed after being alone for so long.

Ozai looked to Katsu in his arms as the babe slumbered. He knew it was time to tell Niwa everything. To finally confront the name he’d abandoned to save his own hide years ago. He owed it to her, and to his children. To all of his children.

Niwa gave the final blessing for the new spirits that had taken refuge in her forest. She told Khospa that, to let them know she was thinking about them, she would make a birdcall he had taught her when she was little. As she gave the signal a trial run, whistling out a perfect mimic of a songbird, the forest slowly erupted into a chorus of whistles.

Khospa hugged his granddaughter. “I won’t be far, Rosebud. And I will continue to keep watch over Chiyo and Katsu, and any other grandchildren you might bless me with.”

Niwa didn’t want the embrace to end, but before she could say another goodbye, she realized he was gone. Niwa laughed, wiping her eyes as Aang touched her shoulder. “He hasn’t changed.”

She and Aang returned to the crew as he checked in with Katara, who was visibly exhausted, as well as the others.

“You’re all welcome to stay with us for the night. I have plenty of hay for Appa, and my house has enough rooms for everyone.”

Aang and Katara were eager to take her up on the offer; Zuko nodded as well, but Azula seemed… less than excited. But she finally relented.

As she ensured everyone had a good meal (unfortunately the jackalope meal had to be discarded after being left out for hours), Niwa escorted everyone to their rooms and tucked Chiyo into bed.

“Goodnight, Rosebud,” she whispered as Chiyo was quick to fall asleep after the day’s trials. Niwa kissed her daughter’s forehead as Ozai did the same, holding onto Katsu as he looked upon her. He had so many racing thoughts; for so long he had wondered if she might have become a Firebender. But instead, something he never could have dreamed had happened.

Ozai felt Niwa’s hand on his back, and he stood to join her as they retired back to their room.

So many events that day… the two simply changed into sleepwear and Niwa tended to Katsu, settling him into the crib set up in front of the bed.

“Goodnight, Starshine,” she whispered. Ozai sat on the bed, still too wired to close his tired eyes. Niwa joined him, sitting back as she sighed. A few moments of silence passed before Niwa spoke.

“Okay. I need to know,” she began. Ozai, nervous, looked her way. “What am I calling you from now on? Chen or Ozai?”

Chen was the man that Niwa had met and fallen in love with. But he no longer existed; he was a farce to begin with. Ozai was the man that Chen replaced in Ozai’s own mind - but Ozai was still alive - both physically and in the memories of his older children, the Avatar, and the world.

Chen never existed. Ozai remains; despite how much Ozai himself wishes he could move on. But he already has, but that didn’t mean his children had moved on. Their pain was still evident. The pain of so many was now evident after an entire colony of spirits had found him and were willing to destroy everything that had brought out the best in him.

He sighed and took Niwa’s hand.

“… Ozai. My name is Ozai. I’m sorry.”

Niwa shook her head at him, finding a smile through the situation.

“Whether you’re Ozai or you’re Chen; if you plan on remaining here as though nothing happened today… I will call you whatever you wish.”

“Then just call me ‘my love’,” he grinned, pulling Niwa closer as she laughed.

“Let’s not get too embarrassing,” she said as Ozai leaned in to kiss her.

The night passed into a bright, sparkling morning. A blue, cloudless sky that lit the dewy earth in a twinkling, golden glow. A cool breeze wafted through the home, and Aang was the first to awaken. He decided to tiptoe outside to perform some katas, and as he passed Chiyo’s room, he noticed her peeking out of her doorway.

He smiled and motioned for her to join him. As Niwa woke up, she could hear the Avatar speaking outside. She looked out of her window to see Aang happily instructing some Airbending moves to Chiyo. She watched both of the realize they weren’t alone, and their forming bond was already unbreakable.

As the morning progressed, Zuko awoke as well, and he got dressed and prepared to potentially wake up Azula, but she was already awake, sitting on her bed just waiting.

“Are we leaving?” She asked. Zuko closed the door behind him.

“No, Niwa’s cooking breakfas-”

“I’m not eating.”

“Azula.”

“I’m not spending any time with them. I will leave this room when we leave this prison.”

“It isn’t a prison.”

“I don’t care,” Azula grumbled.

“Chiyo will want to say goodbye,”

“She can come in here and do it.”

Zuko sighed. “Alright. I can’t make you do anything.”

“Exactly.”

Breakfast was cooked and served; Niwa did her best to cater to Aang’s needs as a vegetarian. Chiyo asked reluctantly if she had to let go of meat to be an Airbender, to which Aang fumbled as he looked into her sad gray eyes.

“I mean… if you’re an Airbender already and you’ve been eating meat I don’t see why you should HAVE to give it up. It’s all personal preference!”

Chiyo’s eyes happily lit back up and she eagerly tore into her pig-chicken slice much to Aang’s dismay.

Notably absent from the table was Ozai, along with Azula.

“Where’s Papa?” Chiyo asked Niwa.

“Papa is… he’s watching Katsu while we eat. Katsu’s been… a little fussy and he doesn’t want to… to interrupt breakfast.”

Aang chewed his food slowly, looking at Zuko, who could also tell something was amiss.

“Oh okay,” Chiyo accepted as she chomped into her rice. Niwa looked up at Zuko, signaling that wasn’t exactly the case. As they concluded breakfast, and Niwa insisted everyone leave their dishes for her to clean, she escorted Zuko up to Azula’s with a tray of food for the princess.

“I hope this is alright,” Niwa said. “But… I want to have a talk with you two before you leave.”

Azula listened to the door open, and she bristled as she saw Niwa at the door. Even with a tray full of food, she struggled to trust the woman. Zuko entered behind her, and Niwa placed the tray at Azula’s feet before she knelt down to the floor.

“… There’s something I want to talk to you two about.”

Azula was quick to try and stand, but Zuko urged her to sit back down. Grumbling, she did so, and Niwa looked to the siblings in earnest.

“… Ozai told me everything this morning.”

Zuko looked to his sister. “Everything? As in…”

“As in the case of your mother, Ursa. About… About Azulon. About his death. About what Azulon wanted done to you, Zuko. About your Agni Kai, about your banishment. About you, Azula, and his beliefs that you were superior to Zuko, because Zuko, you reminded Ozai so much of himself. He told me everything.”

Zuko gripped at the fabric over his pants with a trembling hand. Azula frowned and she stood once more.

“If he wanted to say something he should say it TO us!”

“Azula, wait please!” Niwa stood to grab Azula’s hand, but Azula quickly yanked herself from the woman’s grip. “I promise you; this isn’t me trying to pass information along. This is me asking you if all of this is true.”

Zuko blinked. “Wh-why?”

Niwa held herself. “I want there to be honesty. Even if I have to go behind his back to make sure it’s there. If what he’s told me is wrong, then… I won’t keep him here. But if what he’s told me is true…”

“Don’t tell me you’d keep him anyway after everything he’s told you,” Azula sneered. Niwa held herself tighter.

“I would, Azula. I would because he’s not hiding it anymore. He’s not running. He told me this to make sure there were no secrets anymore. He told me all of that this morning. There’s more, too, if you want me to go further in depth. The Phoenix King? Lashing out at Zuko on the Day of Black Sun? Sending you after Zuko multiple times?” She ended the questions looking at Azula.

Zuko nodded. “Those are all correct.”

Azula turned away. Niwa approached her slowly.

“… I know you were both affected by him; terribly. And I know what it must look like to see someone give a chance to a man who didn’t give one to either of you. But… if there’s anything I can promise you in full honesty: He’s not that man anymore.”

“That doesn’t mean a damn thing,” Azula hissed, turning to face Niwa.

“And I understand that as well. But I come here both asking for your truth, and to let you know his own that he entrusted me with. That he’s not running. That… he hates what he did, but he knows you both have every right to not want to see him. Every right to hate him. There are no words for what has been done. But he does see now. And he is sorry.”

Niwa looked to Zuko, her hands folded in a gentle plea. “He’s sorry to both of you. I know that only goes so far coming from me. But… I wanted you both to know he’s stopped hiding. And if you wanted to confront him yourself, he won’t run. If you need to speak to him, he will be there.”

Niwa placed a hand on Azula’s shoulder, catching the princess’ attention as she turned, trying to force her trembling lips to become still.

“And I will be there too,” Niwa said, reaching forward to wipe a tear from Azula’s cheek.

Azula stared; emotional and still seething, but she didn’t retract herself from Niwa’s hand until she finally took a deep breath and returned to her bed, plopping down to grab the bowl of rice.

Niwa looked to Zuko, who nodded to her; and Niwa smiled before turning to leave.

As Aang saddled up Appa, Niwa stepped outside to watch Chiyo play with the bison.

“Mom! Mom!! Can I get a bison?? Please please PLLEEAAASSE?“ She begged. Niwa laughed as Chiyo bounded into her arms.

"We’ll talk to Papa about it. That is… if there are any other bison out there…”

Aang tightened Appa’s saddle. “We’ve seen clues of colonies! There have to be more out there.”

As Aang helped Katara and Zuko toss the packs into the saddle, Azula joined them outside. She passed Niwa, but not before hesitatingly reaching out to touch her shoulder.

“… Good meal,” she said before stepping away. Niwa beamed, finally getting something positive from the princess.

Back at the door of the home, Ozai stepped out. He lingered back as everyone said their goodbyes until Chiyo noticed him.

“Papa! Come say goodbye!”

Niwa turned to see Ozai; he faltered, but didn’t want to fail Chiyo; nor the promises he’d made to Niwa that morning. Azula stood rigid. Zuko was at ease as he watched his father approach.

“Fire Lord Zuko,” Ozai began. “Princess Azula. You are always welcome at our home.”

“Thank you,” Zuko said. Ozai looked to Azula, unsure of what to say as she refused to look at him.

Ozai continued. “… Have a safe trip home. Give your mother my regards.”

More silence. Ozai stepped back a bit to signal they were free to go.

Zuko looked down to Chiyo, who seemed to become confused at the cold nature of their interaction.

Anger begets more anger; and Zuko knew where he stood in that cycle. He remembered doing his best to change and how he hoped to be accepted by others. He knew the pain of rejection on both sides.

He stepped forward.

Everyone watched as the Fire Lord reached in-

and embraced Ozai.

It was tight. It was suffocating. Much like everything they’d felt leading up to that moment.

Ozai felt his son’s arms hold him, his fingers digging at his back. He trembled, tears falling from his eyes.

Zuko as well couldn’t hide his own tears. His entire body screamed at him. Fear and anger and the still constant pain of rejection was still so loud in his mind; but he hadn’t feared his father in years; and despite the uncomfortable embrace, Zuko buried his face into his father’s shoulder.

Perhaps this was both the ultimate way to prove how much they both had grown, that Zuko no longer feared Ozai, and that Ozai could now possibly begin to accept his own shortcomings without fear of retribution. Zuko was not like his father… and Ozai didn’t have to be like his anymore. He’d already proven that.

Zuko pulled away from the hug, and the two looked to each other quickly before the Fire Lord turned towards Appa in silence.

Azula gaped at her brother as he tried to compose himself. She looked to her father, but couldn’t bear to look at him much longer. Instead, she walked over to Chiyo; pulling the flame-shaped hairpiece from her topknot.

“Hey… this is for you.”

Chiyo lit up. “Really?”

“Yeah. I want you to have it. You’re part of the Fire Nation Royal Family after all.”

Chiyo giggled, and she leaped forward to hug Azula so tightly. “I’m so glad I have a big sister.”

Azula fought her own tears, and she hugged Chiyo. “Don’t forget to write, okay kid?”

“I’ll write every week!” Chiyo answered. Azula ruffled her hair and she stood, looking to Niwa, who offered a smile to the princess. Azula gave a ghost of a smile back; but as she peered Ozai’s way… she just couldn’t look at him… but she struggled to leave.

“… Write a letter sometime. Maybe I’ll read it.”

Ozai sniffled. “Yeah. I will.”

“Just so you know I’ll probably burn the first few. But if you keep trying.. one of us is bound to read one.”

Ozai chuckled. “Then I guess I’ll just have to write every day.”

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep.”

“I’m not promising,” Ozai said. Azula finally looked his way as he nodded to her. “I’m going to do it.”

Azula’s expression dared to falter. “I don’t forgive you.”

“I don’t want you to,” Ozai said.

“… Then… I guess that’s something we both have in common now.”

“Hey. It’s a start,” Ozai said, his voice rough as he subdued his emotions.

Azula lingered one more moment before she turned towards Appa and was helped up by Zuko.

Niwa held Ozai as they watched the bison take to the sky. She heard a coughing sob escape from Ozai’s chest as he watched, and Chiyo rushed forward to wave to the team.“

"Byeee!!” She called out. “I hope we have more fun when you visit again!!”

[ierotits]

Tell us more about why you want to beat up Charles Dickens please?

ABSOLUTELY

it all boils down to the Franklin Expedition, and the way he treated Inuit testimony.

long story short if you are unaware: 1845 2 ships HMS Terror and HMS Erebus went into the arctic to search for the northwest passage, among other things, commanded by Sir John Franklin. both ships promptly disappeared, never to be seen by white people again. many expeditions were sent to search for them, never with any luck. the ships really had just disappeared.

UNTIL

in 1854 a man named John Rae was leading one of these overland expeditions to try find the (by now long dead) Franklin Expedition. along the way he met with and spoke with groups of Inuit living and hunting in the area. they told him of a group of white men they had seen a few years back, traveling in a group of about 45. they spoke of the men starving to death, slowly dying off. they also (most importantly) they spoke of a camp site where they had later found the bodies of about 30 men the next spring, with evidence they had cannibalized each other, bones with cut marks, in cooking pots, etc.

John Rae correctly took this as testimony that the members of the Franklin Expedition had all starved to death, and the last living men had resorted to eating each other, a very normal solution in those sorts of situations. he returned to England and shared this news with the admiralty, who tried to keep the information secret but it ended up in the press. this, of course, caused a huge scandal. the men had been lauded as heroes in the press, so the idea that they had resorted to eating each other really put a dampener on the idea.

there was a lot of upcry about it, not least from Lady Jane Franklin, Sir John Franklin's wife who had been insistent that they could still be alive and be saved. she accused John Rae and the Inuit who had shared the testimony of lying.

Lady Jane had a very significant friend's ear at this time. our darling Charles Dickens. he then wrote a section in his popular magazine decrying John Rae's testimony, saying it was all slander made up by the "wild savages" and John Rae was naive to believe it at all. Dickens said that Englishmen were too civilized and would never resort to cannibalism, and only the lowest most savage races of people cold ever consider it.

Charles Dickens, all in all, was one of the main factors in 1. John Rae being ridiculed and not getting any credit for his discoveries until after his death and 2. encouraging the public to think of native people's as savages, not believing any of their other valuable testimony, and paving the way for other ridiculous theories such as "actually the Inuit people killed them all and ate them, then blamed it on our wonderful morally pure white sailors".

the information provided to Rae by the Inuit has been proven time and time again since then, and there is no denying that the last of the expedition resorted to eating each other. the Inuit testimony has typically been relatively reliable with some inconsistency as time went on, and it was pure racism that motivated Charles Dickens in his defense of the men of the expedition.

if you're interested in any of this aside from my brain spew from memory, for further reading on the Inuit testimony and a full analysis of every piece of testimony I recommend "Unraveling the Franklin Mystery: Inuit Testimony" by David C Woodman. for more info on John Rae's expeditions and discoveries (and how much Lady Jane Franklin sucked so so bad) I recommend "After the Lost Franklin Expedition: Lady Jane Franklin and John Rae" by Peter Baxter.

and if you've got other recommendations or extra reasons to hate Charles Dickens (other than his books just sucking but that might be personal opinion) please let me know!!! most of my reading is just based on whats available at the library lmao.

[sahaias]

Soy Luna Season 2 Episodes 69-80 Thoughts

Okay these might be a bit scattered because I binged these episodes and then went on a date yesterday, so it's not as fresh in my mind as I'd like

Can't say I didn't see the Simbar falling out but it's still rough. It is sad how Ambar did really change thanks to Simon but Simon not believing in her caused her to act exactly how everyone expected her to.

Matteo's actions are so inconsistent and annoying that I cannot support him with Luna in any sense. She's given him so many chances to just be nice to her and things would work out, but he just doesn't and acts all pouty

Rey being the one to reveal the truth after he has no reason to be loyal to Sharon is fitting

The flashback of Lili and Sharon's argument which started the fire was a nice addition. It is Sharon's fault, why is she writing a love letter to Bernie years after he's been with Lili and has a kid with her???

Also I know part of it is having an actress in her early 30s playing Lili vs current Sharon (who's clearly in her early 50s) playing flashback Sharon, but no wonder Bernie picked Lili lmao. She's beautiful and based on how everyone talks about her, her personality is way more sensible and endearing

The Sliders are super cringey and kinda accurate (in personality) to how random edgelord teenagers acted in 2016 minus the goth makeup and clothing lmao

Sharon is such a piece of shit, and I love seeing her in her full-blown villain monologues about how she deserves everything because Lili "stole" Bernie from her and how Luna is "stealing" her fortune. She doesn't deserve shit. It is kinda funny how she packed up and ran the moment she saw Bernie and Luna 100% reunite as family members despite them not even having a full conversation yet.

This Red Sharks plotline is so annoying and seeing Mathias back as another skeevy man is not the Violetta actor return I wanted. Santi Owen felt weird, and this feels even weirder

THAT LUMON MOMENT AT THE END, WHY ARE YOU BRINGING IT BACK AFTER BARELY MAKING IT A THING IN SEASON 2 AT ALL??

I am a sucker for childhood friends to lovers so I think they might be my favorite ship on the show

[princess-of-the-corner]

MLP Rewrite AU - Forgotten Friendship (if you didn't do it already)

OKAY SO UH

I absolutely rewrote this as a whole Thing in the universe and a chunk of things got changed so let's go over those before I get deep into the actual rewrite

1.) I had a separate fic in the AU where Sunset went back to Equestria and talked to Celestia already. Though it /was/ unfinished I remember most of my plans for it? So I skipped that here.

2.) Clover and the Memory Stone..... Clover already had completely different Lore surrounding her, both in-canon and thanks to my 'Hearth's Warming Cover Up' conspiracy theory, and the Memory Stone gave me a plothole headache. So I scrapped both.

3.) I made Wallflower's motivations a touch more relatable and out of her control.

4.) Unfortunately no Trixie in this but I've had fun with her elsewhere and should probably write her into something else lmao

SO ANYWAY

When Sunset gets to the beach and realizes no one remembers her having become their friend, she does manage to out-logic them. Pointing out inconsistencies and where they /should/ remember her being there because, looking into their memory, she's just erased out but not replaced well.

The biggest one being asking how they contacted Twilight when the Sirens were causing problems. The group pauses for a moment, but realizes that there was a journal but they can't remember where they got it. Sunset pulls out said journal, which gets them to listen a bit more.

She asks what they remember about the friendship games, to which Sci-Twi mentions remembering Sunset yelling at her for disrupting the games with portals. She says that it was harsh, but considering the whole event could've hurt her since it knocked her off the motorbike she understands in hindsight.

The rest of the group are like 'wait, what?' because they don't remember Sunset being in the games and couldn't fathom 'mean bully Sunset' being part of the games with them. But when asked who was paired with Rainbow for the motocross portion of the games, no one remembers. Except Sci-Twi, who says it was Sunset.

Sunset tests this and prompts further with- okay so I had a Thing™ in my rewrites that in the previous school year Pinkie and Sunset had been in the school play together. So as an inside joke they casually quote their lines at one another. Sunset kicks the habit off, reciting one of her lines. Pinkie answers, but stops. Her mind trying to remember, but all she can see is herself alone on stage, reading lines to no one.

Pinkie is Not Handling This Well™ and has dropped into straight hair mode and is hugging the fuck out of Sunset at this point. She forgot a friend! How dare she forget a friend?!

She asks them about after the games, because I had a fic re: finding Sunset's Human counterpart. And they remember her, but why would they look for her without prompting from their Sunset?

Sunset tests how far this goes by calling Flash. Just to see if it's an 'everyone' or a 'just the main characters' thing. He also doesn't remember making up with her. But with a little prompting of 'who gave you a sword for Christmas'(long story lmao), she gets him to listen. And he thinks about it more and says he remembers everything from when they 'broke up' and were fighting, but nothing about their friendship before that. Even though they would've been friends and hanging out before the 'break up', right?

Okay I'm going on a tangent trying to set up how the memory thing works lmao but anyway

The Rainbooms decide that they need more help than this and decide to talk to Princess Twilight about it. This includes everyone going through the portal because they're freaked and paranoid they'll forget again! (will be using 'Twilight' for pony and Sci-Twi for Human for now)

After some shenanigans of most of them getting used to Horse Mode™, Twilight does some prodding and questioning and experimenting. She actually /does/ know a spell that might cause this, but it's one she's not an expert on. Thankfully she can just do a quick teleport across town and grab someone who knows the spell a lot more.

Rarity my darling it's time for you to shine!

After quickly updating her, Twilight suggests that it may be the spell she used on the chandelier. Which Rairty agrees.

She elaborates, saying she had found the spell in a book up in the Crystal Empire. Technically it's a Crystal Pony spell, but Unicorns can replicate other Magics.

Anyway: The spell is used to copy a memory into a gemstone. She used this to make the tree root chandelier that's in the Castle of Friendship. There was a chunk of trial and error as she got the spell right. She gives examples of what went wrong, like her initial trials on Rainbow volunteering 'erase my memory of the Daring Do books so I can read them for the first time again'. Sometimes it erased her memory of the books, sometimes it erased her memory of the pony. The spell is even specific enough to differentiate different 'versions' of someone, such as 'Twilight as a Unicorn' vs. 'Twilight as an Alicorn'.

Now, the spell isn't /supposed/ to erase memories, just make a copy. But it can fuck up and erase. And unfortunately, Rarity can't reverse the spell without having whatever gemstone holds the memories.

Ofc this means they have to figure out who did this! Clearly since more Humans are getting their Pony Magics, it should be a counterpart to a Unicorn or Crystal Pony. They just have to figure out who. Rarity muses that, as the spell is an incomplete version, it's likely they tested it out and had it backfire on them a lot. Backfired spells can cause low-energy and even some pain, but also it means the person may have accidentally erased memories of themselves.

They go back to the Human World, leaving Twilight and Rarity in Equestria and keeping them updated in case something goes wrong, and decide to flip through the previous year's yearbook to look for someone they don't remember. Pinkie eventually points out Wallflower, and everyone knows that Pinkie's memory for people is very good so if she doesn't remember....

They lure Wallflower to the school gardens, and Sunset does the memory dive to look into it. She sees that Wallflower had been accidentally activating the spell, erasing herself from people's memory. Had been getting more and more hurt from the unfinished spell. But since she didn't know how to fix it, why not use it?

This causes a bit of a fight because Sunset's like 'the FUCK do you have against me?!' and Wallflower yells back about how it's unfair that someone like Sunset can just 'be nice' after so much meanness and get super popular while people like Wallflower who were always nice get entirely forgotten.

Pinkie calls her out on this of like 'hey! I consider you a friend why not come to me!'. Wallflower is very cynical on this because Pinkie considers everyone a friend but there's no way in hell she knows /everyone/ as intimately as a friend should. Which, yeah, Pinkie can do some wild shit but there's people she's closer to than others. But she's always open to being closer to someone! Or to helping someone out, including helping them find someone they may find a true friendship in! Wallflower still could've come to her!

Wallflower is starting to see that she fucked up, but she can't return their memories of Sunset. She doesn't know how. So she does the one thing she thinks she can do, give them a fresh start!

Ofc Sunset tries to block this and gets hit and. well.

It erased memory of the 'Human-esque' Sunset. Which means, as far as Sunset's aware, she just ran through the portal after her fight with Celestia and is mid-breakdown.

Not a fun experience!

Sunset has no idea what's going on. All the others are mad at Wallflower. They try to fix it and explain that there should be a gemstone. Wallflower offers her necklace but.... there's nothing in it. No memories, no Magic whatsoever.

Sunset is VERY confused but trying to help. the others are getting more upset and worried because 'oh shit she doesn't remember jack shit of the last six years and we still don't know how to fix it!!

But since they tell Wallflower to stop zapping everyone goddamn it they drag the Pony!Twilight and Rarity over to try and fix this shit.

Wallflower: "Oh god I'm sorry I don't deserve friends after all I've done how could anyone ever forgive the awful things I did???"

The Rainbooms+2: "Well. You didn't try destroying the world so you're really not even in the top 10 of wildest people we've befriended. Also we may have a Problem™."

Anyway! Rarity manages to figure out what crystal the Memories are hiding in! They're hiding in Wallflower herself. Crystal Pony bodies mimic crystals/gems so they can do the same thing.

Now knowing where the Memories are, Rarity can channel the spell and return the memories to where they should be.

Sunset and Wallflower get to talk for a bit about Hey That Was Fucked™.

But also like. Sunset knows what it's like to be alone. She left her home when she was still a kid, and wound up in a whole other dimension. One where, even if she makes some friends, she could never fully befirend them because she couldn't tell them /what/ exactly she was. It's different now, but she'd faced that before. She knows lonliness.

And Wallflower feels guilty because she never really put together how alone Sunset was. Thought she'd just skated by so easily in the friends department.

And Sunset helps her realize that there's more to friendship than just kindness. Being nice helps, of course. But you need to reach out. You need to put in an effort.

But at the same time, everyone you meet holds the potential to become your best friend.

[residentraccoon]

Ok we have all the songs, time to make a top, with comments even 😳

1. Norway - I love love love this one, this eerie, thrilling melody mixed with the medieval theme and old norwegian language just makes this song perfect and no other song of this year can come any closer to it. Very unique, true to their homeland, absolute masterpiece. I'm definitely following more of Gåte's discography from now on!

2. Estonia - Well they're singing about drugs here and this song is exactly like a drug - addictive. What sells it is their awesome, slightly batshit crazy energy (I absolutely love it) and let's not forget the traditional instruments. I can see a Trenulețul scenario with this one tbh.

3. Slovenia - Absolutely magical, the structure of this song is pretty uncommon and the lil RRAH sounds are interesting, love how it takes a while to build-up and I just get chills all over. This one is a piece of art.

4. San Marino - This song is destroying my Spotify wrapped and it's not even funny, there's something about this one that makes it instantly addictive. I've listened to Megara since last year when they were at Spain's NF with Arcadia and all I can say is that I love their style. Sassy pink and punk rock with a touch of Spanish traditional sounds during the bridge, they just mesh together so well. I don't understand why it's so underrated (currently last in the odds lmfao) and I'm looking forward to their live performance.

5. Denmark - Generic pop song my beloved, why is it so catchy though? I've said it in a previous post, I just reminds me of songs I'd hear in 2013 or so and I love the "Oh-Oh" parts. Lovely

6. Lithuania - The beat hits, it's just awesome fr. Lovely staging and colors, Lithuanian sounds so pretty and melodic as well as his voice.

7. Belgium - Wonderful build-up, the song at first sounds very chill and gives me Blanche vibes (I looked it up and they have the same composer so not surprised lmao) but man, the climax is greaaaaat!! Especially with that choir in the backing. My only gripe would be that he keeps repeating the title over and over again, which can become a bit tiring. But just a bit. It's still a great song!

8. Switzerland - I don't know whose idea was to mix opera and drum n bass together but they're a genius, this is really cool, like absolutely nuts. I love how the bridge is very soft and quiet, opposing the loud and dramatic chorus, I feel like the song itself is pretty messy and inconsistent but I really like that, it's very out of the box and innovative. Genius entry.

9. Latvia - Underrated, I can see why it might fail to grab an audience in the fandom but I really like this one, especially his voice. The song flows nicely too, I only wish the staging would be a bit more...dynamic though? I really want Latvia to qualify for once, felt like it might have a chance since it could attract some casual viewers (some of my casual friend watchers really liked it!) but seeing how brutal semifinal 2 is (and one spot will be inevitably taken by...yeah won't elaborate) I'm afraid Latvia's out for this year as well. I hope at least for a surprise or who knows. That's only how I feel at this moment.

10. Spain - My biggest grower of this year and a total banger, I don't understand why it slaps so hard it has no business to, the message is SO real and it's so unapologetically sassy.

11. Czechia - Same story as with Latvia, underrated to hell and back, I know the live version is...a lil terrible but the studio one I really like. Love how you can feel the frustration through her shouty lyrics and how she's blaming herself for not loving herself more instead (also the beginning might or might not remind me of Aijā I mean the intro with the drums makes me think of it-) ANYWAY

12. Croatia - Listen I'm very happy for Croatia being seen as a most likely winner of this year, they deserve it, Baby Lasagna is an amazing man and the message is on point, even if it's not exactly my favorite I definitely root for him!! Please meow back if you agree. Besides this, the glam ethno rock sound is just 👌 chef's kiss

13. Armenia - Love love love that they brought something ethnic!! The girl's energy is infectious and she's such a joy to watch, the music video is very pretty and describes their culture so well, overall I adore this.

14. Netherlands - GREAT I relistened to it so I can rank it and now I have Europapapapapapa stuck in my head how wonderful. This tells me already that this is such an infectious bop that will never leave your head. Possible televote winner, love the quirkiness and Joost is really goofy we stan.

15. Greece - Welcome to Greece, everyone who visits the country is obligated to listen to this the moment they step out of the plane- /j It's so Greek, so fun, so ethnic, geez what's happening with everyone being so diverse and true to their culture this year? This song screams summer vacation in Greece and I'm here for it.

16. France - The raw emotions in this...he sings with his heart and soul, his voice is very deep and gruff which feels a bit unusual to hear such an intimate and emotional ballad from him, but this is what makes the song special.

17. Italy - Love her attitude and how she sells the song, it's very sassy and fun, won't be surprised to see Italy get yet another Top 5 finish with this.

18. Ukraine - Interesting mix of melancholic pop and energetic chanting and rap. Alyona just nails the rap part perfectly. Overall nice song, grew off me but still great.

19. Ireland - This makes me have chills all over my body. It's very haunting and suspenseful, I love the uncommon unique sound and how they recite the lyrics as they are a poem/creating a curse, I simply love how avant-garde Ireland are this year! Finally they're taking a risk and even if the song is unconventional i hope it will have a following that will help them get through the semi! 🤞

20. Poland - Oh look another grower, it's such a cute song for some reason and her voice is so pleasant to the ears.

21. Serbia - At first I thought it's a bit boring but now I find myself mumbling "Lila Ramondaaaa", like it has a hook even if it's a melancholic ballad.

22. Portugal - The emotions in this are immaculate, she conveys all her struggles in life so well into a ballad that's somewhat soft-sounding. Epic.

23. Australia - For some reason this song takes me back to 2015-2016 and I don't get why?? Maybe I heard music that's similar to this in that period, who knows. That chorus slaps immensely, as well as the didgeridoo(I hope that's the instrument), but I'm not extremely head over heels about it. It's enjoyable still!

24. Malta - Contrary to popular belief I enjoyed the revamp, she made it easier to sing live and it just has more oomph, good job, Malta.

25. Finland - The whole 3 minutes are absolutely batshit insane and I love it fr, these dudes are a delight to watch. The song tbh I like it but not that much to rank it higher, but I appreciate the craziness, the message, what sells it is definitely the staging and the guys' stage persona.

26. Austria - Mmmmm I know it's a fan favorite but I'm not a big fan of this, like I've said before in some other posts. The hype at first was highly irritating (especially on twitter, dear god 💀) for such a...just okay/good song? First of all I appreciate the throwback to the late 90s/early 00s eurodance/synthpop music that was popular back then, I think it does a great job imitating the vibes of it, but at the same time is it just me or this song feels so...calculated and has this eurovision-specific formula in its structure/sound? It was definitely made for it being performed live and to pander to the yass queen slay ate and left no crumbs-side of the fandom? Which honestly kinda drags it down a lot for me.

27. Sweden - I can't unhear parts of Air in this, well actually that's their style, neat electro pop tbh, I can bop to this, pretty enjoyable.

28. Moldova - Falls flat but what makes it a bit stronger is the vocalisations in the chorus, as well as the lil ethnic sounds. That drum is also quite catchy. They have to pull out a wonder-staging for this to qualify.

29. Georgia - If Georgia isn't qualifying with this one then that means their only hope is borrowing Loreen at this point. It's a competent girl bop with powerful vocals, that has a dedicated following, but I appreciate that even if it's a girl bop it's not so aggressively in your face like...other examples I've seen before. I'm personally not big on it, but it's nice.

30. Azerbaijan - Oh? Azerbaijan sends something in their language, what is this 2050? And not with a melfest reject? For the 2nd year in a row? I'm very impressed, but even with all these I don't feel that attached to the song, just glad they took a risk instead of renting a swede for safe qualification like they did in the past years. I love the ethnic touches though.

31. Luxembourg - Cute and peppy french bop, although a bit generic and that's about it, no strong feelings.

32. Cyprus - Mmm your regular girlie pop of the year, unsurprisingly from Cyprus as well. Pretty catchy, has a cool vibe but I'm not feeling anything about it.

33. United Kingdom - Just a competent mid-tempo boy bop, honestly nothing much to say since it kinda failed to impress me. Good effort though.

34. Albania - I don't get why they changed it into english, why they turned it more upbeat (I liked the balladier version more) and the rap part feels disjointed. Albania wanted to relive their 2016-2017 era I see.

35. Germany - I'm sorry but this song bores me to death and can't listen to it without zoning out which is a shame because he's a competent singer (his voice is the best thing about Germany this year) and I'm afraid they're again heading for a bottom 3 finish 💀

36. Iceland - Mmm this isn't is, Iceland. Very sorry. Sounds like it would get 13th in 2004, it's a very by-the-letters eurodance.

I will not rank Israel here. It's still mind-boggling that they're still allowed to participate.

[grimlins-chaos]

Lo'gosh/Vari revamps! full body w/ comparisons to the og designs + alt looks + my mad rambling under the cut!

Do keep in mind these are my takes on the character and this is for my fic that's in the works where i'm doing some MASSIVE retconning of story and world building to 1, feed my brainworms because this *is* a warcraft x ffxiv crossover and 2, keep my fucking sanity because blizz retcons their own shit so much and the way they handle characters so inconsistently it makes me violently angry i fucking hate the books with every fiber of my being

I'm more than happy to give clarifications on some of my ideas just be aware that i might sound unhinged as i explain the ideas i've cultivated in my brain case for literal years like a conspiracy theorist so without further ado LET'S GO!

First things first let's get into Lo'gosh!

He starts off with his OG look as functionally it works and it's an iconic look in a ring where your gladiators are being pitted against guys who are damn near naked you don't want to disadvantage them with too much armor

the only few changes i made was switching out the sash for some more straps and the armored pieces are not nearly as bulky (i did straight up forget his spikes but i'll add them another time when i have a bit more time so just imagine they are there lmao)

But as iconic as the look is his clothes do deteriorate especially as my version of lo'gosh gets tossed around on the regular (think of captain america's "i can do this all day" while bloodied and beat the fuck up) on top of because it being such an iconic look Lo'gosh would need a change of clothes to replace the torn ones he was given as well as make him blend in a little more with your common adventurers, so when he meets up with allies in the eastern kingdoms he gets some new drip

he does hold onto the old armor pieces as to hold on to the lo'gosh identity for as long as he can before he has to return to being Varian Wrynn (to build more upon his feelings of "i don't know this varian, is that really the life i want?" in issue 7 of the comics because it was such a missed opportunity for internal conflict, we love a man who's struggling emotionally)

Storywise i felt that rather than have him be the strong willed half of Varian while the other half is more "weak willed" instead Lo'gosh and Vari represent two different sides of his ideals, attitude, and how he expresses love (yes we are going FULL fuckin' cheese mode here) Lo'gosh would represent the rebellious side of Varian, the one who would try so desperately to escape because he just wants to be free. Pre-split this would present most in his younger self who would regularly sneak out to have fun and support his people, away from the pressures of his duties that would later on take away any minuscule amount of freedom he had in his life. Lo'gosh also represents Varian's strong sense of justice, never afraid and not even hesitating to throw himself on the line to defend complete strangers because (unknowingly to Lo'gosh for most of the story) his past with a young abused girl that he once called best friend along with Arthas very much ingrained it into his head that he would never leave anyone who takes advantage of others and hurts them like how he had failed that girl

Lo'gosh is the side of Varian that's a force of nature that will act on the spot to protect others, unwilling to back down and has absolutely zero fucking idea on when to just give up (granted giving up seems more like a made-up concept to him)

When it comes to Vari (the nickname i gave to the more charming/gentle dad side of Varian just for the sake of making it less confusing) I do have a lot more to say so buckle the fuck up XD;;

In terms of design i fuckin' hate his pajama suit, i tried to redeem it, i very much did, but it wasn't workin' out for me XD It makes sense in that when it comes to Vari i very much see him as being extremely insecure, and so while katrana bumps up his charm to obnoxious levels the actual charisma he displays is a mask to try and hide his struggle. So it makes sense for him to make himself seem less regal and wear as simple as clothing as he can outside of obvious formal affairs and Katrana would very much prey on this especially as corrupt black dragons lean on self-importance and ego and so she'd make herself wear purples and reds while Vari blends more in with the crowd, she makes it so your eyes go to her rather than the fuckin king because she has manipulated her way to the top and holds all the power over him

But the whole body suit deal? uglier than sin, this ain't your wish medieval batman costume so for my redesign i gave Vari this

it was a combination of norse inspired renfaire tunics and as well as the outfits in one of my favorite movies; Quest for camelot (as King Arthur was a minor inspiration for my version of Varian)

And as for armor it does still have close resemblance to the og look in the comics but gave it a bit more bulk and baggyness in some areas as i imagine Vari representing the protection spec while Lo'gosh is of course fury, so to take a bit more of a beating he's got more protection

Vari being the half of Varian that retained his memories, he carries the brunt of the trauma and guilt brought on by all the trials and horrific events he's experienced but to cover his pain not only to try and hide from it but also in an attempt to protect his son and be there for his people (the mask of "everything's just fine" while the wearer of that mask is actively drowning). But Vari also carries the fatherly attitude of Varian, this is the half that presents Varian's love of his son the absolute most and for him he's willing to literally jump off a cliff just to save him. Vari will defend those he loves with his life.

Lo'gosh: Offensive Vari: Defensive

Together they are the two halves of one ballsy motherfucker you really do not wanna piss off

Anywho if you've made it this far i personally applaud you for subjecting yourself to my madness, i hope it was at least entertaining and a fun read!

[lavenderedhoney]

Day 77 on T! 11 weeks! Been using about a third of a pack of androgel a night. So far:

Skin: been weird but not too bad! Started reacting immediately and continues to be up and down. Before T, birth control had my skin really clear and my skincare routine was literally just moisturizing after a shower. Immediately after starting T I broke out for about a week (nothing cystic but quite a bit more irritation and texture than I've had in years). Not the most convenient for me bc I have skin picking problems lol 🤪 but it's been ok! Since then my face has stabilized somewhat. I've had a couple more breakout periods but they never seem to last longer than about a week and then things go back to being relatively for 2-3 weeks or so. Cleansing at least once a day with micellar water seems to help.

I've started getting folliculitis and acne from certain things touching my face which is new - stuff like a pillowcase that hasn't been changed in maybe 7 days tops, or a mask I've worn too many times. Both of these are kind of annoying!! I used to reuse a KN95 7-8 times (airing out in between uses, obv) but recently I've been capping it at 3 or maybe 4 wears and changing my pillowcase slightly more than once a week. The micellar water helps with all this too.

Also, for the first time ever I'm getting small blemishes on my shoulders and chest. This started like 2 weeks ago. 🤔 I used to get a zit on my chest like once a year but now I've got a few. Might just have to start regularly cleansing these areas too, who knows!

Also also, sometimes the alcohol in the gel dries out the skin on my leg and that's itchy and annoying, but it's easy to combat by lotioning in the morning after I wash the gel off.

Dick: I honestly haven't been keeping close track of the size but my gf says she can actually feel it when she touches it now lmfao. An improvement for sure! Tiny dick problems. 😔 She started noticing a significant size increase at about 2 and a half weeks, and she says it's continued to get a little bit bigger since then. For the first time ever I can grind on horizontal surfaces and receive stimulation from it, which is crazy (previously mentioned tiny dick problems!!). I'm definitely a little more sensitive than I used to be but I haven't had any problems with oversensitivity when getting off!

Libido: I was SUPER horny all the time for the first few weeks, but I'm just regular, pre-T levels of horny now most days lmao.

Facial hair: I've had a couple long-ish chin hairs for years but they were SUPER fine and almost impossible to see. Now the slightly darker one is course enough to feel with my fingers, and my peach fuzz is starting to get longer too (only in my chin area so far tho). I've started trimming the longer hairs bc I'm curious to see how they grow back!

Body hair: for the literal first time ever I have visible leg hair on my thigh lmao. Before it was very, very blonde and fine, and now it's light brown and feels just a little bit fuzzier under my hands. Only on the one thigh tho, bc I've only been applying T to one side just for experiment's sake. Gonna start applying to both sides when I can get more leggings (I've been wearing a pair that I cut one leg off of to sleep in to make sure I don't get any T on my girl).

Body shape: haven't really noticed yet! Might have experienced a little bit of weight gain since my pants have been getting a tiny bit snugger in the waist, but I don't own a scale on purpose so I can't check and my weight's been inconsistent the past half year anyway! So I don't know if it's the T or just my body doing body stuff, and I also don't know if it's weight gain or just body fat moving around.

I'm having a pretty good time overall!

[kimoralov3]

Just a Mission

requested by: @arkofblake (i asked her for ideas lmao) word count: 3850 pairing: sam wilson x reader warnings: it took me months to write so it might be slightly inconsistent, swearing (as usual), i don't remember what pronouns i used for the reader, slight angst, bucky and nat make a joke about sam and the reader keeping it down, fake dating, the head of the hoa, suburban neighborhood, google docs AND grammarly quit on me so there's bound to be errors somewhere

It was a fairly normal day in the life of an Avenger. Natasha and Clint were in the boxing ring, Steve and Tony were making up some plan for the next team mission, and you were getting ready to go on a mission with the man that you had had a crush on for about a year and a half now. 

“I don’t see why you’re making such a big deal out of this. You’ve been hiding your feelings for forever now, one little mission isn’t going to change that.” Bucky said as he laid on your bed, not being helpful as you ran around trying to find all your clothes.

“Bucky, this isn’t just a mission. Me and Sam are going undercover as a newlywed couple — for who knows how long might I add — there is ample opportunity for me to slip up and admit my feelings for him. And you know I can’t handle the embarrassment of being rejected! I have been doomed, and it’s you and Steve’s fault!” You said, throwing a shirt into the pile forming from your suitcase.

Bucky stared at you for a second before replying. “I never realized how adorable you are when you’re all panicky.” You let out a yell of frustration and throw your shoe at him, Bucky laughing as he easily catches it. 

“You’re not helping! At all!” You said as you started pacing back and forth. Bucky finally got up, walking in front of you to stop your constant movement.

“Look, you’re gonna be fine. The mission is gonna be quick and easy, then you can come back and go back to staring at Sam like he holds the world up with his bare hands. Just do what you’ve been doing. Okay?” He said as he stared into your eyes. You let out a sigh before nodding, rubbing your eyes a bit. 

“You’re right; I’m freaking out for nothing. What’s the worst that can happen?”

—

The worst that could happen was you and Sam having to drive all the way to your destination. Alone. Together. Just the two of you.

“Y/N, you’ll be fine. It’ll only be a couple hours, and you can sleep through most of it. Why are you making such a big deal out of this?” Steve asked as you followed him around the compound. He had been walking from the kitchen when you found him, so he was trying to balance his sandwich in one hand and some mission files in the other. You talking to him was making that task a little more complicated than it should’ve been.

“Steve, you cannot honestly tell me that you’d be fine living alone with someone you’ve had a crush on for forever, but they don’t know about your crush, so you have to pretend like being near them—”

“Y/N! There you are, I’ve been looking for you. Are you ready to get going?” Sam asked as he walked up to you and Steve. Steve gave you a look, raising an eyebrow before walking away. Thanks for nothing, Steven.

“Uh, yeah, I’m almost ready— let me just go grab my bags, okay?” You stuttered out as you turned and walked away. You heard Sam call out your name again, causing you to turn around so fast that you almost fell on your face.

“Your room is that way.” Sam said as he pointed in the other direction. You looked to where he was pointing, then back at him, feeling your face heat up as you walked past him without a word. This is going to be the worst mission of my life.

—

 6 hours in the car, alone with Samuel Thomas Wilson, was both a dream come true and your worst nightmare. On the one hand, this was the perfect situation— you and the guy you’re in love with trapped together; if you couldn’t get him to fall in love with you now, there was no point in trying anymore. On the other hand, you’d be in a car with Sam alone. For 6 hours. It was way more likely that you would end up embarrassing yourself and pushing him away for good.

In the end, neither of those things happened because you slept all the way there. You were awoken by the soft touch of Sam’s hand shaking you gently. “We’re here.” He said as he unbuckled and got out of the car. 

You rubbed the sleep from your eyes before stepping out of the car. You took in a deep breath before taking in your surroundings. It looked like your average suburban neighborhood. The houses were all shades of blue, yellow, or white, with the occasional very faint shade of pink. All the lawns were perfectly kept, never extending past the white picket fences. A few of them had a tree in the front, maybe even the occasional swingset. Nothing to write home about, though. 

“This place already gives me bad vibes.” You mumbled to yourself. You heard Sam laugh as he closed the trunk, both of your suitcases in hand. You reached out to help him but he pulled them away before you could reach them. 

“I got them. Do you have the keys?” He asked as the two of you walked up to the front door. You nodded and reached into your pocket, grabbing the keys and unlocking the door. Once you were inside, you had to laugh a little at the decor. Steve and Bucky definitely had a fun time picking things out for this house; it was the perfect blend of your and Sam’s styles. 

Before the two of you could properly settle in and set everything up, there was a loud knock on the door. You looked at each other suspiciously before you opened the door, Sam standing closely behind you. 

“Hi there!” Said the obnoxiously loud woman, standing on the doorstep with a plate of cookies. “You two must be the newlywed couple; I’m Amanda, a longtime resident here and head of the HOA! Welcome to the neighborhood!” She continued on as she handed you the plate of cookies. You chuckled nervously, looking up at Sam for help. 

He thankfully took the hint, stepping up so that the two of you were side by side, and held out his hand. “Nice to meet you, Amanda. I’m Sam, and this is Y/N.” As he introduced the two of you, he casually wrapped his free arm around your waist.

You tried your hardest not to think much of it before opening your mouth again. He’s just doing his job; the two of you are supposed to be a newlywed couple, and this is what couples do! They touch each other, and don’t look like deer in headlights while doing so! 

“It’s so lovely to meet you! Here, why don’t you come and sit down while I take those cookies off your hands?” You suggested with as much sugar to your tone as you could muster at the moment, stepping to the side and opening the door further so as to be more inviting. This must’ve been the right move because Amanda graciously accepted, Sam closing the door behind her and showing her to the living area. You watched as they both sat down on the couch, taking a moment to make sure everything was okay before heading to the kitchen and putting away the cookies.

Once you were finished, you walked to the living room and sat next to Sam on the couch. Amanda was perched on the loveseat diagonal to the couch, looking at the living room with a semi-judgemental eye. “Wow, I’ve never seen a house with such… unique decor! How did you both decide on this theme?” She asked as she crossed her legs and leaned back in her chair. 

Sam once again took the lead, knowing that he was a lot better with his words than you were. “Well actually, Y/N and I split up the duty of choosing the decor for each room. Y/N picked out the decor for the living room, the kitchen, the dining room, and the guest bedroom, while I picked out the decor for my office, the bathrooms, and the basement. We worked together to design our bedroom and en suite, though.”

Amanda let out a small gasp of genuine shock before turning to face you fully. “Y/N dear, you better hold on tightly to this one! My husband would never offer to take care of such a big project like that!”

You laughed at that, the first real laugh since you and Sam had arrived in Virginia. “Oh believe me when I say this, I never plan on letting him go.” 

—

It had been a month since you and Sam had “moved in”, and things were pretty calm for now. The two of you still hadn’t pinpointed the head of the crime ring, but it was only a matter of time now. You and Sam made sure to get more involved in neighborhood activities, making sure that nothing about you was suspicious. Well, almost nothing, according to Amanda.

“So you mean to tell me that the two of you haven’t tried for kids at all? I find that very hard to believe.” Amanda said as the two of you sipped on tea in her living room. Your face heated significantly, and not just because of the warm tea you were drinking. 

“We’ve decided that we want to be a bit more stable before having kids. We just got married and bought a house, we should take some time to ourselves before adding little ones to the mix.” You let out the perfectly practiced reply. It was clear to you and Sam that the people in town were very nosy, so your lies had to be rock solid. 

Amanda hummed at that, seemingly finding it believable. “Well when the two of you do have kids, I’m sure that they will be adorable. I mean I have honestly never seen such a more attractive looking couple!”

You playfully rolled your eyes, slowly getting used to Amanda’s constant comments about how good the two of you look together. If only we were really together. 

“I’m sure they will be adorable.” You settled on saying, bringing the mug of brown liquid to your lips. 

“Kids? Who’s having kids?” Sam asked as he walked in from the garden. Amanda had originally invited the two of you over for lunch while her kids were at school, but she mentioned that she needed help moving some stuff around in her garden, and Sam offered to help since her husband was at work. Cut to now, Sam standing behind your chair, sweat making his purple shirt cling to his muscles. Lord give me strength.

“You and Y/N. One day, hopefully.” Amanda said cheerfully, causing Sam to let out a laugh.

“Yeah, one day, but I don’t think that’ll be happening any time soon.” Sam said as he leaned on the back of your chair. Amanda scoffed, rolling her eyes and waving a dismissive hand. Sam placed a quick kiss on your forehead before getting a bottle of water and heading back outside. Amanda quirked an eyebrow at you, to which you responded to by shaking your head. This mission is so difficult but for all the wrong reasons. 

—

Another month had passed by, but at least you had figured out who your target was by now. His name was Jerry. He, his wife, and his 3 kids lived at the far end of the street. He was quiet; kept to himself. Not the kind of guy you’d be expecting to be heading up a million dollar crime ring. 

“The two of you are doing good, you just have to get enough information on him for us to arrest him. Do either of you have any ideas as to how you could do that?” Steve asked. The three of you were having your weekly debrief, trying to figure out how to solve this problem as quickly but quietly as possible.

“Well, Amanda is the head of the HOA. If there was something fishy going on, she would know, even if she doesn’t know she knows.” You suggested as you looked up at Sam. 

“Ugh, I knew you befriending the head of the HOA would come in handy!” Sam said, causing you to smile lightly. 

“What’s an HOA?” Steve asked. You chuckled, sometimes forgetting that Steve was from a different decade than you and Sam.

After a longer than necessary explanation, you and Sam ended the call with Steve, deciding to start putting your real plan into motion. You sent Amanda a quick text asking if you could come over tomorrow, to which she quickly agreed and said that the two of you could have a nice little wine night. 

“You know, if I didn’t know any better, I would say that you’re actually starting to like hanging out with Amanda.” Sam teased as he laid across the couch. You rolled your eyes, flopping down into the loveseat.

“Am not! I have just realized that she is very useful for the purpose of this mission. That is all.” You defended yourself as you leaned your head over the arm rest, making your view of Sam upside down. 

“Oh really? Because you seem to be really enjoying those weekly wine meetings that you two have all the time. What do you two even talk about during them anyway?”

“First of all, we do not have weekly wine meetings. Second of all, when we do drink wine, we talk about stuff that everyone always talks about with their friends, especially things people like her talk about. Her garden, her kids, her husband and everything he’s doing wrong, you, when we’re gonna change our minds and have kids— you know, the boring stuff.” You waved your hand around as you spoke, not thinking much about what you were saying.

“She’s determined that we’ll change our minds and have kids.” Sam said as he shook his head. 

“Yeah, she is. Too bad this is just a mission, otherwise we could give her what she clearly desperately wants to happen.” You said with a chuckle. However, the lack of response afterwards caught your attention. You sat up and turned around to properly face Sam. “Sam? You okay?”

“Uh, yeah. I’m actually a little bit tired, I think I’m gonna get some sleep. Goodnight.” He said, quickly walking to the bedroom. What was that about?

—

After that things between you and Sam had been a bit…off, as some might put it. It wasn’t something that would be noticeable to anyone just passing by, but you definitely took notice of his sudden distance. And you weren’t the only one to notice.

“What’s going on between you and Sam?” Amanda asked as she came to drop off your groceries. You and Sam were hosting a “neighborhood get together”, but it was really just the final step in the two of you catching Jerry in an act of crime. Amanda had agreed to help you get all the food ready, but her being a part of the plan meant that you had to listen to whatever she believed to be wrong between you and Sam. 

“What do you mean?” You feigned ignorance as you chopped up some vegetables. Amanda scoffed as she began to get stuff together to make the rolls.

“Oh don’t bullshit me; I’ve been married for 10 years, I can smell a marital spat from a mile away. Did you two get into an argument or something?”

You sighed, weighing your options here. Continuing to insist that nothing was wrong would get you nowhere, Amanda was the most stubborn person you knew, next to Natasha. But you couldn’t tell her everything that was actually wrong, that would blow your cover and you were too close to your end goal to let that happen. What would even be your lie to get out of this? 

“It’s nothing important really, just a silly little argument. Nothing life changing.” You settled with, sending Amanda a quick smile to be more convincing. If she didn’t believe you, she didn’t let it show. The two of you worked together to get all the food ready, and luckily finished before everyone began arriving. You hadn’t really seen Sam since this morning, but tried not to think too much of it. He had taken the initiative to schmooze with the husbands of the neighborhood, hoping that they would let him into the crime circle so he could get firsthand evidence. You could only hope that everything was going well and that he hadn’t gotten found out.

Luckily your wishes came true, as you saw Sam walking towards you with a determined face. “Can we talk? Upstairs?” He asked once he got to you. His tone made it seem like something had gone wrong, so you took a quick look around to make sure no one was paying close attention to the two of you before nodding and following him upstairs. 

“What’s wrong? Did you get found out or something?” You asked worriedly. Sam didn’t say anything, just closed the door and stood there for a second. “Sam? Is something wrong?”

Sam turned around and gave you a confused look. “What? What are you talking about, why would you think something was wrong?”

You eyed him up and down before responding. “Sam, you haven’t acted this strange since you pranked Bucky by moving his stuff a little to the left every day until he found out about it. What’s wrong?”

Sam smiled fondly at the mention of messing with his best friend. “Ah, I remember that. Was scared to have my back turned for a week.” Sam was about to go on a long, detailed rant about all the pranks he’d played on Bucky, but the look on your face told him that doing so would not be a good idea. 

Deflecting his feelings had never been a skill of his. 

“Sam, if something has gone wrong, you need to tell me. Is someone suspicious of us? Do we need to move to plan b?” You asked, frantically searching Sam’s eyes for a response. Sam sighed, rubbing his hands against his face and muttering something too quick and low for you to catch. 

“Look Y/N, I’m going to tell you something and I need you to listen with no interruptions. Okay?” He asked as he grabbed your hands. You nodded, signaling for him to continue. “I’m in love with you, and I have been for a couple years now. I know I’ve been kind of distant these past couple of months, but that’s because my feelings were getting stronger and I didn’t know how to handle them— and I apologize because that shouldn’t be my excuse— but I cannot hold it in any longer because it is distracting me from the mission.” 

There was a moment of silence. Sam’s was out of nervousness and yours was because you were trying to process everything the man in front of you had just said. 

The silence was broken when you burst into tears. Sam acted quickly, pulling you into his warm arms. “I’m sorry, I didn’t think this would make you cry.” Nice going, Wilson.

“These are happy tears, dumbass.” You said through sobs and sniffles. That made Sam stop, pushing you back slightly so he could get a better look at you. Behind the fresh tear stains and red eyes, there was the person he fell in love with. “Sam, I have been in love with you for years. Bucky has been trying to get me to confess but I was always too scared to do so. Guess I really am an idiot, huh?” You said with a chuckle as you wiped away your tears. 

Sam chuckled as well, pulling you closer once again. “It seems like both of us are the idiots.”

— 

Soon after that, the mission came to an end. At the end of the day, all you had to do was catch Jerry in the act and you’d been successful in doing that. The two of you had just got done filing out mission reports and you had gone back to your room. Before you could even finish unpacking, Natasha and Bucky were storming into your room and locking the door. “Hello to you guys too?” You said in a confused tone.

“What happened between you and Sam?” Natasha asked as she grabbed—snatched, actually— you halfway unpacked bag from your hands and threw it on the floor. 

“What are you talking about?” You asked as you sat on your bed. You knew exactly what she was talking about, you just felt like enjoying a little game of cat and mouse. 

“Don’t play that game with us. The two of you were practically walking on clouds when you got back, and then y’all were practically sitting on top of each other during the debriefing. Did one of you finally confess or do I need to lock the two of you in a room again?” Bucky asked, hands on his hips. Someone’s been spending a bit too much time with Steve.

“First of all, I still owe you an ass whooping for that. And second of all,” You continued, looking between the two of them. To the untrained eye they looked like their normal selves, but you could tell that they were bursting at the seems in anticipation. “Yes, something did happen between me and Sam.” 

“Fucking finally!” They both yelled at the same time. You rolled your eyes, already expecting these reactions from them. 

“You can’t just say something like that and not explain. Spill!” Natasha said as she threw one of your pillows at you. 

“We’ve been here all of 5 minutes and the two of you are already hounding Y/N?” Sam said as he opened the door. Natasha and Bucky whipped around, making an annoyed noise.

“How’d you get in? I locked the door.” Natasha said as she crossed her arms. Sam held up the key to your room that you’d given him. 

“How did you get a key?! I’ve been begging for one for years!” Bucky asked. You shrugged, getting up to slot yourself into Sam’s side.

“Not important. What’s important now is that the two of us want to spend some time together and y’all are interrupting that. Get out.” 

Natasha and Bucky groaned playfully before shuffling their way out and muttering something about the two of you keeping it down. Once you were sure the two of them were gone, you turned around to face Sam fully. “Did you mean what you said about us spending some time together?” He asked as he smiled down at you.

“Yep. There’s this cute little cafe far enough for none of them to come bother us. Wanna head down there?” You asked sweetly. 

Sam hummed, giving you a peck on your lips before pulling you towards the door. “Wouldn’t miss it for a thing.”

[juniperhillpatient]

The Crossroads of Destiny Re-Watch

WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Definitely one of my favorite episodes of the entire series OOOH I love Crossroads of Destiny so FUCKING! MUCH! It's such a good episode.

Alright, so, shocking to no one probably, I've discussed this episode before. I'm linking a post I wrote about Azula & Zuko's dynamic in this episode because I think that it explains a lot of where I'm coming from. HERE ya go.

This is mostly a Zuko episode, honestly. So, let's talk about him. Zuko is READY to fight Azula. Like, no hesitation, dramatics & violence at the ready he is prepared to be on sight. Lucky for him, Azula doesn't really want to fight him. Otherwise, he'd probably be dead. Sorry Zuzu but it's the truth. Iroh demonstrating how he got the nickname the Dragon of the West is pretty iconic. +500 iconic behavior points. Also, +100 to Ty Lee & Sokka for their flirty banter-filled fight. I'm not gonna lie, I'm sort of starting to ship them. The mid-fight flirting is just fun, okay? Although yes, I'm aware that it's a tactic on Ty Lee's part. That doesn't mean she doesn't think he's cute also.

It's hilarious how some things never change & some things stay the same (....I sang-read that in my head...I listen to too much Frozen...anyway) from my initial reactions to this show like 2 years ago lol. I didn't get spoilers per se before watching ATLA but it's such a popular show in the public's consciousness that I did kinda know Zuko would be redeemed, & I just assumed I'd ship Zutara so I read the scene romantically & liked it for that reason.

[ID: Katara & Zuko in the crystal catacombs. She is crouching far away from him, looking tearful. end id]

I don't read the tension between Zuko & Katara that way anymore, but I see how someone could. Anyway, I wrote THIS post about Katara & why I think she acts the way she does. That said, I'm still annoyed with her for offering to use the spirit water on Zuko though because GIRL I get you but also it is a WAR lmao you don't think you might need the magic healing water? For something more important? Like, Zuko will live, he's not even in physical pain right now!

Watching Azula's devious & brilliant coup unfold is just...SO FUCKING SATISFYING GOD I LOVE AZULA SO FUCKING MUCH SHE'S SO FUCKING COOL!!! AHHH!!!!!! Okay, I'm calm. ish. I just...I just...LOVE HER SO MUCH.

[ID: Azula saying "Don't flatter yourself. You were never even a player." end id]

SHE'S SO ICONIC!!!!!! AHH!!!! Okay, I'm trying to be reasonable. +3000 iconic behavior points. I had to stop myself from giving her like 20k because like!!!!! HAVE YOU SEEN HER??? I LOVE HER.

Okay. *ahem.* Anyway. Iroh in this episode is super interesting. They lean REAL hard into the "wise old man who says proverbs" thing in this episode. And I think that's sort of the narrative pushing the audience to see Iroh as more of a perfect wise old man than an actual character in his own right, & that kinda gets on my nerves. BUT, looking at Iroh as a complex character, I do think I can get behind the idea that Iroh WAS willing to be complacent in the life he was presented with but NOW....he saw a chance to help the Avatar, & realized he had to take it. He realized that Zuko was going to go back to the home that traumatized him, & he panicked. I've seen a lot of fans criticize Iroh for never telling Zuko, "hey, maybe you should consider that the Fire Nation is evil & the Avatar is good." I think I would rather criticize the writers for not showing us more of Iroh's internal struggles though because the inconsistencies ARE interesting on a character level if you think about Iroh as a person. ✨Nuance ✨The main reason they become annoying is if you take the presentation of an "infinitely wise old man with all the answers" & run with it too hard. Not the most interesting way to look at it. So, in that way, Zuko's betrayal hurts.

But in the way that all I care about in life is the Fire Siblings.....Zuko's betrayal is the most iconic thing he's ever done actually! +2000 iconic behavior points. Obviously, I'm being hyperbolic & you guys (hopefully) know I don't actually root for the Fire Nation but I just love the Fire Siblings.

I will say though - something that hasn't changed about my perception of Zuko's betrayal - I 100% get it & I was never mad at him for it. I'm not saying I'm NEVER mad at Zuko ok, don't group me in with people who wash away all of Zuko's flaws please, I'm saying that I sympathize & get why he did what he did & I felt this way the first time that I watched too because I remember arguing (not like angry arguing, just debating) it with my family. Literally, the Fire Nation is all he knows! His SISTER is telling him to please come home. He misses his father & wants his father's approval. It's like....completely sympathetic & understandable. I'm not saying he's RIGHT I'm saying it's sympathetic. There's a huge difference. ✨Nuance✨

Oh & the fight scenes in this episode!!!!! Shocking to 0 people my favorite is Katara versus Azula. They're both incredible benders & it's a spectacular fight & ALSO NARRATIVE FOILS FIGHTING EACH OTHER!!! TWO PRODIGIOUS YOUNG BENDERS FIGHTING SIDE BY SIDE WITH THEIR BROTHERS FOR WHAT THEY BELIEVE IS RIGHT!!! FIRE VERSUS WATER - & LIKE BLUE FIRE (THE HOTTEST KIND) VERSUS ICE!!! YEAHHH!!!!!

[ID: Azula with her bans swooshing in front of her. end id]

Katara gets +3000 iconic behavior points for CUTTING OFF PART OF AZULA'S BANGS with ice. Oh & I never noticed it until now but it sort of parallels the moment when Zuko cuts off the end of the wheat Jet has in his mind in THEIR homoerotic boss fight. I KNOW these are two of my favorite ships for good reason, if your ships can't have epic death battles nearly killing each other what is even the POINT MAN!!!

Um, anyway. And Aang dies. What is it with the final Chosen One Tm heroes dying? Buffy, Aang, Harry Potter...Sorry for bringing the Terf series into it but like....C'mon, y'all get why I did right this is a pattern in iconic coming-of-age Chosen One stories. I don't know what it means, but it means something, I'm sure of it.

Luckily, Katara still has the spirit water & she saves Aang's life, so he's fine. Yay! That is about all I have for this episode for now. I'll tally the iconic behavior points in a separate post :)

[hyacinthsdiamonds]

Anybody else feel like there's going to be a major shakeup on the grid for next year? I say this now and guaranteed the grid will be identical to this year but anyways 💀💀 here's my predictions as we get closer to silly season;

Red Bull; Max for definite ain't going nowhere. Now Checo I feel like it's make or break from here until the summer break. Either 1 he's there for another year or 2 he's choosing to leave the red bull umbrella or Helmets demoting him to alpha tauri. I don't see any other way. I could see Yuki getting the call if the seat becomes available and he's definitely earned that phonecall from his work with alpha tauri. The lastest video red bull posted of him and Max racing each other could be them trying to soft launch it and trying to test the waters of public opinion but they have had Yuki and Max do media videos just the two of them before. Daniel's been mentioned but I'm not sure if I see that happening, alpha tauri seems more likely, I do see Helmet using him as a threat to Checo similarly to how Toto used talks with Daniel and Esteban to push Bottas to sign quicker (the talks were never serious on mercs end, resigning Bottas was always the main goal up until and including when he made the decision to leave the team and go elsewhere in 2021) but Helmet Marko is many things, predictable, ain't one of them. The tests at Silverstone will be interesting though. I wouldn't be surprised if the seat becomes vacant and they try to get Alex back, he definitely impressed a lot of people with his performance at the last race and his work over the last two years with Williams and he did so much work to help red bull develop two championship winning cars. Alex has recently said that's not the plan in the short term so I think his position with Williams is secured for at least the next season but who knows what might happen when silly season kicks off properly. Prior to Charles' contract extension news, I could've seen red bull also pursuing him, they've talked a little too much about him and Ferrari recently for it to be accidental (Helmet going from "he's inconsistent" to praising Charles for taking risks in order to bring the best performance possible out of an inferior car... Interesting) so maybe in the future they'll try to bring Charles onto the team. I do genuinely think GP would recommend Charles as a possible new red bull driver purely so that he knows Max will at least get to race Charles and then have less time to talk to him on the radio to distract himself lmao.

Alpha Tauri; I'm sorry but unless Nyck completely turns his season around from here to Abu Dhabi, I don't think he has a chance in hell of getting a contract renewal from Helmet Marko. There's a lot of talk about Daniel coming in, which I do get them wanting an experienced driver given the issues alpha tauri has had the past two seasons but I do admit, despite my love for Daniel, I'm setting the nostalgia glasses down a second, I would be a little annoyed because that's another year alpha tauri, one of the few teams actually set up for developing young drivers, doesn't bring up one of said developing drivers. But do I see it happening? At the moment I do. It's also important to note that as Alpha Tauri is losing Franz Tost as tp, I do see how having an experienced driver at least for the new tp's first year would be beneficial. I mentioned Checo possibly being demoted above but I wouldn't be surprised if Checo simply walked from the red bull umbrella entirely rather than go to alpha tauri. Yuki and the team work so well together so I don't see him leaving for another team unless he gets the red bull seat, he could maybe be pursued by other teams such as Alpine or Aston but I don't see why those teams would change their lineups as of now. If Yuki moves up to the main team and Nyck loses his seat, Liam Lawson should definitely at the very least get a call. I wouldn't put it past Helmet to try to offer the seat to Mick either (there's multiple valid reasons why I think Helmet might pursue him but the funniest and pettiest reasons why I see him doing so is just so he can piss off Toto and to try to lure Seb back into the fold and work with the team bts, two birds with one stone lmao).

Ferrari; I don't see Carlos leaving. Before this year and last year I would've laughed at the possibility of Charles leaving Ferrari and while I don't believe he'll leave them anytime soon especially not with the new contract extension, Ferrari is his dream and he wants a championship with them, but it's been shit show after shit show for so long now. Ferrari desperately needs to get their shit together and reward the trust and faith he has in them before they push him into pursuing the championship with someone else because that is what will end up happening if they don't make some positive progress.

Aston Martin; no changes unless Fernando Fernando's again lmao (arguments against him doing that; good relationships with team, his teammate, he's been in the podium places pretty consistently and he might get to battle for a race win at some point this year. arguments for him doing that; his contract history, Aston is going to be getting a Honda engine). If Fernando does that, Felipe will probably get the call.

Williams; I don't have any particular feelings regarding Logan but I don't see them changing their lineup next year. Alex's work has definitely impressed so I do see Williams may have to fight to hold onto him but I think his seat is secure for at least 2024. If Alex is successfully pursued by other teams, then maybe Mick will get a call but I think Williams' lineup is settled for next year.

Alfa Romeo; Bottas and Zhou are a good lineup together so I don't see any immediate changes here but given that audi will be taking over Sauber in 2026 and Alfa Romeo will effectively be no more, there's a possibility that either Bottas or Zhou or both could be replaced by a driver line up backed by Audi in preparation for that but I would think that they would want to hold on to ar least Zhou and I think any changes are more likely for 2025 rather than 2024. There has been a lot of discussion about Mick being in contention for a seat since the Audi announcement.

Alpine; I don't see any changes for next year. So far Esteban and Pierre have worked well together and as yet they haven't had any major issues such as infighting so I don't see why there would be any changes.

McLaren; I see zero changes for 2024. After the pr mess last year which harmed any progress they've made with their image post Ron Dennis, they genuinely can't afford to lose Lando who is a major draw in for the team, but I do see him at least entertaining other offers for longer than he has in the past given how much issues his latest cars have had. Every time Red Bull have had talks with him, he's then announced a contract extension with McLaren lmao but I don't see another extension being added this year, at least not until McLaren makes some headway with their car. Oscar has been performing well so I don't think they'd replace him but if I was Mark Webber/his manager I'd be pushing him in red Bull's direction (I blame whoever said he was red bull coded because that's all I can think about since) but I don't know if he'd take the alpha tauri seat and I don't think he'd get an immediate to ticket for the red bull one just yet, I think if red bull wanted one of the McLaren drivers for the red bull seat they'd pursue Lando first. All in all I don't think there's going to be any changes here.

Merc: unless Lewis pulls a Nico and unexpectedly retires, I don't see any changes. Could see Toto trying to pursue Charles and at least giving a call to Esteban if Lewis does pull a Nico but I don't think that scenario is likely.

Haas; unless Haas redos what they did at the end of 2020 to kmag (which would be doubly cruel) and Romain Grosjean or what they did at the end of 2022 to Mick, I don't see any changes.

[worst-archivist]

ℐ𝒩𝒯ℛ𝒪~

Welcome! This is my rp/ask blog for Jonathan Sims, head archivist of the Magnus Institute. If you are not familiar with The Magnus Archives, expect sarcasm and pessimistic cynicism galore. Also expect triggering content. The Magnus Archives in and of itself deals with basic phobias such as the feeling of being watched, possession, bugs, paranoia, the apocalypse, and several more. If you struggle with any of these topics, I suggest avoiding this blog. While gore and body horror appear in TMA as well, I will write about these a lot less. Gore and body horror tags will be listed below, along with some others.

Also, I have AU ideas that I’d LOVE to incorporate here, but for now this blog is based on season 1 Jon and any random head canons that I may have come up with.

ALSO also, I might throw in some of my drawings and/or fic ideas once I improve them a little bit. My sketchbooks are absolutely covered in tma doodles, so maybe I’ll throw in a few here and there. Who knows, flip a coin.

ℳ𝒪𝒟 ℐ𝒩𝒯ℛ𝒪~

Hello! I’m Lilith. My pronouns are they/them, and I am going into my senior year of HS. While I am obsessed with tma, as of writing this post I have to admit that I haven’t listened past ep 130. Keep in mind that I don’t really care about spoilers, but don’t expect me to know them LMAO. My likes/follows will come from @testing-999, but I doubt anything else.

ℛ𝒰ℒℰ𝒮~

1. No nsfw content. Jokes, references, etc. are fine but I will NOT be doing any straight nsfw scenes. I headcanon Jon as asexual, and will not be budging on that.

2. DO NOT RUSH MY REPLIES. I can and will drop whatever thread or ask I am getting rushed on.

3. Please recognize my boundaries. There’s nothing I hate more than watching a line get stepped on, and once again I will not hesitate to ignore/block you.

4. I had a rp/ask blog back in 2020, but only recently redownloaded tumblr. There’s a good chance I’ll either forget to tag something or that I’ll tag it wrong, so please call me out for it. Just as I don’t want anyone overstepping my boundaries, I don’t want to overstep anyone else’s.

5. I’m not against ships, but keep in mind Jon is roughly in his upper 20s and I will not rp anything with a large age gap.

6. Be patient with me 🥲 I’m a high school senior that over-scheduled their classes, so this year will be a struggle for me. I’ll be as active as I can, but expect inconsistency.

6. Events, ideas and suggestions are more than welcome!! I appreciate any and all feedback, and if you have a fun rp idea I would LOVE to hear it

8. CROSSOVERS ARE MORE THAN WELCOME!! Same with asks too. I love love love interaction, I’m like a little bed bug that feeds off of it.

And last but not least

𝒯𝒜𝒢𝒮~

In character post - statement begins || head archivist

Gore - Ow! Ouch! Owie! || head archivist

Body horror/transformation - metamorphosis begins || head archivist

OOC post - Lilith is sleepy || OOC

Characters besides Jon posting - archives expanding || MORE CHARACTERS

Crossover rp - does your world have coffee? || CROSSOVER

Ask - tell me what happened || ASK

Rps including the wonderful @diviningjade - Fashion major? Space girl? Who knows || diviningjade

And any more tags that might need to be made will be added. PLEASE let me know if there’s anything specific that you’d want me to tag.

[x-authorship-x]

Anon who asked about Shisui using Koto (too long to write it all) on himself here, now I'm thinking ED!Shisui somehow realizing ED!Itachi got free from Kabuto's control with his eye and trying to do it on himself because he can't stand the idea of fighting against Konoha&Co., but having to be sort of subtle about it because if Kabuto realizes what he's doing too early he might keep him under tighter control or something to keep him from trying again

That, or Shisui just straight up using Koto on Kabuto himself and forcing him to use all his Edo Tensei on Konoha&Co.'s side instead of against lmao

I'm... really intrigued and it's because my mind immediately swerved onto a tangent. I don't particularly want to kick the beehive of people who know far far more about canon than I do, this could all be purely fanon theoretical but-

How does Mangekyou...work? Like, the differences in techniques?

Because I just read this ask and thought "does ED!Shisui even HAVE Kotoamatsukami, there's only two eyes and Danzo had one and Itachi had the other, so is his corpse blind or what?" But then I was like... Does it matter??? In that, does the mangekyou ability come from only within the eye or does the original user play a bigger part?

Again, this is mainly for fanon shenanigans, i know people with canon receipts would snipe this idea dead so please be gentle with me on a Wednesday morning thank you

But just for the sake of this, Sasuke got EMS when he took Itachi's Mangekyou but he didn't get Itachi's own special techniques (or blindness???) And his own Susanoo didn't change to Itachi's. Kakashi got Obito's eye when it was just a fresh Sharingan and then they matured to Mangekyou together. Would Kakashi's have matured if Obito hadn't also witnessed Rin's death? Dunno. HOWEVER, Danzo uses both Kotoamatsukami and Izanagi mangekyou techniques, so obviously the techniques are accessed directly through the eyes and not the combo of Mangekyou + OG user. Right?

But... That's inconsistent? If EVERYTHING Mangekyou was stored just in the eyes, then why didn't Sasuke inherit Itachi's blindness, techniques, or Susanoo? It seems that Susanoo users can actively find and use variations of weapons and techniques, so the Mangekyou is fucking customizable to a degree 👍 that implies that the user has some degree of influence on the inner workings of Mangekyou and, therefore, that Mangekyou aren't necessarily a 'complete whole' that is neatly picked up and popped elsewhere (like one skull to another)

Basically, for the sake of a really fucking kickass fanfic, I think Shisui should be the key to Kotoamatsukami. I think that the stupid ten-years thing should just- not apply to Shisui. I think Shisui should be the only person able to sense Kotoamatsukami activating. I think Shisui should be able to "remotely" influence Kotoamatsukami. I think Shisui himself should embody some of the strengths of Kotoamatsukami even when ED-ed or blind. Is this incredibly OP? Not really if you think about canon bullshit (Itachi really pulled Izanami out that time, huh) but also yes. Do I care? No ❤️

So basically what I'm suggesting is that Kabuto should bring a blind Shisui back with Edo Tensei and Shisui just... tears through the control ✨

Kabuto: do this

Shisui, hotwiring the controls: no🥰

[sapphire-weapon]

Lol I def don't think I'd be as into Leon if his non sleazy version didn't exist. And ig he's somehow both sleaze and non-sleaze at the same time, since both versions do seem to be currently(?) in use.

Also I guess if everyone accepted that canon is inconsistent as fuck and the timelines are clearly separate *maybe* that would reduce some of the arguments. Since there somethings that were 'canon' at some point and were later retconned. And at the end of the day with fandoms, everyone gets something different from canon and ends up having a different version of the characters in their head. (also ppl just have different perspectives and one isn't suddenly more valid than all the other, no matter how loud or insistent they are lol).

I do find it kinda weird how much hate you get for your opinions that you post on your (personal) blog since it's not like your words the 'word of god' and people are perfectly with in their right to disagree??

there are a few very, very loud, very, very prominent figures in RE fandom who keep screaming that everything is canon, literally everything, and there's only one timeline.

and if those people would just shut the fuck up, this fandom might know some fucking peace.

i guess i'm the most prominent person in the fandom preaching two timelines and selective canon? so people come here and screech at me, because it's my posts that get passed around the fandom, and i'm the one who gets blamed for "disturbing the peace."

i'll admit that i fucked up in not capitalizing on my rising popularity in summer of last year and going full content creator. i kept everything here to my personal blog, and that was a mistake. i should've made a separate blog (and possibly a yt channel like people begged me to) so that i could maybe cultivate a platform worthy of actually challenging those charlatans around the fandom.

but because i kept it to my personal blog and continued to treat it like a personal blog, i alienated a lot of people that i maybe could've won over. whereas, if i had treated this more like a public, community square and went full Customer Service Voice with everyone, i'd actually like... not be a pariah around the fandom LMAO

but it's whatever. i've said this from the start, i don't do this for clout. i literally just started talking to myself one day and somehow gained a following. and because i'm so ornery (because this is my personal blog, and i don't care to have an audience for my personal shit), it's too late to go back and change course now. people have solidified their opinion of me, and that's that.

and people are gonna be people, you know?