#liz allan. headcanons / what are you sorry for this time?

[ahsterism-aa]

✧･ﾟ tag drop: film muses 

[mrsspidermanmaryjanewatsonparker]

Peter and MJ in Far From Home

SPOILERS!

I will be talking about the movie over all but I feel given the subject matter of this blog that this aspect of the film deserved it’s own section.

Basically they did our ship a disservice.

If you ever see anyone daring to bring up the MCU movies as superior to the Raimi films and are using the Peter/Mary Jane romance as ammo against the latter shut that shit down because they don’t have a leg to stand on.

I’m not going to die on the hill of the Peter/MJ romance under Raimi being the best thing ever or there being the greatest possible chemistry there. But at least from a plotting point of view it was competently executed, at least it was believable on paper. *

In this movie it’s like they hook up because the plot says so.

And I know this because in Homecoming, Peter had a crush on Liz and Michelle was...a rude jerk to him basically and then abruptly at the start of this film BOOM Peter has the hots for MJ. Out. Of. Nowhere.

In fact he’s MORE into her than he was into Liz.**

In Homecoming Peter’s drive revolves around his relationship with Tony whereas in this film his primary motivation at first is to hook up with MJ until that goal then has to be weighed against being a hero. Chunks of the movie are dedicated to him thinking about ways to get close to her, to get her the right gift, to take her to the right place, to charm her basically. And further chunks are dedicated to the obstacles he faces to that end (namely a deep cut comic book reference from Marv Wolfman’s run which was kinda cool)*** and her gradual reciprocation of his feelings...oh and her knowing he’s Spider-Man.

In contrast Peter’s feelings for Liz weren’t nearly as big of a deal and yet somehow were much more believable.

Oh and to say the PS4 game delivered a better relationship would be an understatement. I think we all knew that was going to be the case going into this but even I wasn’t expecting the chasm to be this big. I thought we’d get a competent teen romance story if nothing else. But we didn’t even get that.

As problematic (in all the ways you can use the word) as the John Hughes movies that MCU Spidey borrows from are, they were better than this.

I think the word that comes to mind the most when looking at the handling of the relationship is ‘rushed’.

And yet ironically when they finally do get together their first kiss is awkwardly overlong. I mean maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaybe that was the point because they’re awkward teenagers but I think it was just incompetence.

I look at both characters and I cannot really fathom why they like one another. They just do because the plot demands it.

You can headcanon and contort the plot as you like but the end result is the film gives you nothing. They are together because...Tom Holland is the lead and Zendaya is a hot property right now I guess.

Now MJ is better than in the last movie, much more likable and less Ally Sheedy from the Breakfast Club. I guess that goes against her prior characterization but I can buy it.

She’s gone from boring and someone you could never see hooking up with Peter because she’s a jerk to him to...well someone who’s a bland goth-lite stereotype I guess but is capable of the odd compliment.  Stiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiill don’t see what either of them see in the other though. They have nothing in common and they also don’t have traits that balance one another out.

But that’s all looking at Michelle and the relationship unto itself...how does it stack up as an adaptation.

Well how should I put this?

FUCK THIS MOVIE, THIS ISN’T MARY JANE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I can’t believe Mary Jane has been given the Dark Phoenix treatment of screwing up once then getting a second chance only to screw up again.

What the fuck are (the live action) Spider-Man movie’s problem with just doing the female love interests from the comics rather than mix and match elements from different characters, AUs and OCs?

At this point Betty Brant and Liz Allan have been the most faithful!

...Sigh...

Okay so first of all if you were still holding out hope Michelle/MJ might not be Mary Jane sorry you are shit out of luck. When they kiss there is a visual reference to ASM #143, their first kiss. They also never refer to her as anything other than MJ in the movie.

So she’s MJ.

And no, despite your hopes she never dyes her hair red either.

As I already made clear her personality is nothing like Mary Jane’s. Which is like disrespectful even beyond how it’d be disrespectful for any character because Mary Jane’s personality is essentially her super power.

I died a little every time she was on screen and uttered some eye roll worthy bullshit about how people died here or there or how she likes broken things more.

It’s not even that they gave her a different personality to comic book MJ’s but rather that they almost went out of their way to give her the absolute opposite personality.

Just about the only thing they sort of took from the comics was her knowing Peter’s identity, but they play it more the way it was presumed she found out before Parallel Lives was published.

It even creates something of a plothole because it’s made clear she learned because it was an obvious secret, so why hasn’t anyone else deduced this besides this cynical high schooler?

I might write more about this as thoughts come to me but that’s all I got for now.

They fucked up MJ, they fucked up the relationship. Go rewatch that fucked awesome texting scene from the PS4 game.

*Hell in a rare instance where I will invoke the Webb movies and Gweema Stoney positively, even those movies did the romance better than this. Put aside the chemistry the pair had, at least you could understand why Peter and Gwen would like one another.

**I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, I feel so sorry for Laura Harrier. Not only was she a good actress delivering a likable performance and had chemistry with Holland, but you could buy her and Peter getting together even if it was a bit fanboy wish fulfillmentey. Plus their relationship was seriously plot relevant beyond just coaxing one half of the equation to be in the right place at the right time and ultimately get themselves endangered.

And what did she get for her trouble?

Publicity played up Zendaya, Zendaya gets on the posters which Harrier is wholly absent from and she isn’t even mentioned in this movie.

***On a side note that scene where the SHIELD lady demands Peter strip in front of her and get into his new costume and then Brad stumbles across them...and takes a picture that he’s going to use to prove Peter was trying to hook up with her and thus torpedo Peter’s chances with MJ...

Um....WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

An adult authority member lures a minor away into a secluded area and exerts their dominance by demanding they strip in front of them. Then in a state of undress another minor comes across them and their reaction is that this is perfectly fine but they’re going to use this as ammunition to protect their romantic relationship.

Like no dude you just stumbles across a scene from a PSA about pedophiles.

Why was this scene played for cringey laughs it’s really fucked up, imagine if the genders were swapped for a moment holy shit!

[peterjonesparker]

spideychelle prompsoal headcanons!

ahhh, hello! sorry it took me a while to write these ones. i fell asleep and also prom is such a funny thing. bUT. here are some headcanons :)

peter’s a bit worried about prom. not because it’s prom or because it’s supposed to be this huge high school thing that you remember for the rest of your lives.

that’s actually what he’s worried about

last time he went to a school dance? not the best experience. homecoming sophomore year was one of the worst days of his life. not only did he have to leave behind liz allan, the girl of his dreams who turned out to have a villain as a father, but he also had to fight said father and almost died while doing it.

he still wakes up some nights, screaming out as the building falling on top of him disappears. his screams turn to tears as he stares at the bottom of the top bunk bed and may comes in and holds him tight to her chest. it’s been over a year, but he still gets the nightmares.

so he’s not excited for junior prom. sue him.

ned’s been trying to convince him to go. the decathlon team is all planning on renting a party bus and heading over together. which, peter admits sounds fun. a part of him really wants to go. but he can’t shake this feeling that something will inevitably go wrong and his night will be ruined and the nightmares will never end.

and then mj asks him to prom. well, kind of.

it’s a boring wednesday during lunch, ned is still getting his food because he had to speak with mr. harrington after class. so it’s just peter and mj at the lunch table. (she sits across from them these days.)

“so, my parents have been asking me about who my date is for prom and i want them to stop, so can i just say it’s you?”

“what?”

mj groans, lifting her eyes from her book so she can roll them at peter. “my goodness, parker, for a genius you’re really dense. can you be my date to prom so my parents get off my back?”

and. he’s honestly stupefied. because: “wait, you’re actually going to prom?”

“yes, peter. i’m allowed to want to spend time with my friends, you know.”

“yeah, of course, i just-” he doesn’t actually know what he thought. she did go to homecoming for the last two years, so it makes sense she’d be going to junior prom. but then: “wait, is this how you’re asking me to junior prom?”

michelle’s cheeks tinge slightly more pink and she looks back at her book. “i told you, my parents-”

“i know what your parents want, but what do you want?” he doesn’t know why he asks that. mj is his friend. has been for the better part of a year. she joins he and ned on their snack breaks and movie nights and study dates. he doesn’t want her to be his date to prom. he’s not even planning on going to prom. but then

“i mean,” she coughs, keeping her eyes trained on her book. “i guess it would be fun to go with you.”

his face lights up and he smiles all bright and wide. “you want to go to prom with me!”

“no, i don’t!”

“that’s literally what you just said!”

“shut up, parker. that’s not what i said.” and she slinks further into her seat and scrunches her eyebrows together and she’s putting her head even further into her book and she looks so adorable. and, oh. oh. he doesn’t expect the sudden quickening of his heart or the flush that rises to his cheeks. he doesn’t like mj that way. he doesn’t, he never, they’re just friends.

and then ned plops down into the seat next to him and peter can’t say anything further and michelle is leaving before he can answer her and he feels badly because she looks disappointed. but he doesn’t, he didn’t even think about the possibility that he could have feelings for her in that way until like five minutes ago when she asked him to prom.

so, when their last period of the day rolls around, he sits next to michelle and scratches out a small note, which he hands to her when their teacher starts talking about the mitochondrial dna.

i’d say yes if you asked me properly.

when she finally looks up at him, shocked, he smiles and whispers, “you have to at least buy me dinner first, mj.”

she shoves him lightly and then pays attention to their teacher drone on and on for the rest of the day. she seems to have a small smile on her face but she doesn’t say anything else on the matter.

peter wonders for a brief moment if he’s messed this up and she’s decides to just ask someone else. and he tells himself he shouldn’t be disappointed because he didn’t want to go to prom anyway. but that was before he knew mj wanted him to be her date.

but then at decathlon practice the next day, michelle is grilling him on russian history around wwi when suddenly she asks: “true or false. on may 8, 2019, michelle jones asked peter parker to the prom.”

and

is she for real?

he looks around at all his teammates, who all have their eyes trained on him. they seem to be excited, sitting on the edges of their seats. they also must surely see the blush on his cheeks.

"uh,” he manages to get out. “true.”

he hears her whisper, “oh god.” and then ned comes in (and wait, when did he leave?) and he’s carrying this big bouquet of red roses. but as ned gets closer, peter can see that there are a few white roses in the mix. and the white roses spell out the word “prom”.

ned hands the bouquet to michelle and she walks over to peter. she won’t meet his eye as she hands him to bouquet and opens her jacket to reveal a shirt with a “?” across the middle.

and, peter is shocked. it’s been one day. did she already have a shirt with a question mark on it? how did she get flowers so quickly? she told the whole decathlon team without him knowing? how did she arrange this?

and then, sensing his confusion, michelle sighs. “my dad is a florist. i’ve had this shirt for years. logistics aside, will you go to prom with me, you loser?”

peter stares at her for a few moments, dumbstruck. and then he nods his head, smile growing when he hears the decathlon team cheer. mj smiles. she smiles in a way that’s small and as if she can’t help it. like she’s tried keeping it off her face, but the joy is too powerful.

so peter stands up and he hugs her tightly. her arms slowly wrap around his torso and the team cheers even louder. he thinks he hears flash yell: “get a room, you dorks!” but peter doesn’t care because he’s pressed up against michelle and her hair smells nice and it feels good against his face.

“thanks for asking me properly.” he whispers, moving so his face is smushed even further into her hair.

“thanks for saying yes.” and at this peter pulls back, and michelle looks so...vulnerable. and peter wants her to know he’s not going to hurt her. that she is giving him a gift by letting her walls down with him and he won’t ruin that.

“for you, anything.” and michelle punches him in the shoulder and laughs, calling him a loser. but peter just smiles. because michelle jones has a crush on him and she got him flowers and he’s going to go to prom with her.

wait until he tells aunt may.

[peterjonesparker]

Are you interested in any oyher Spiderman characters? (Homecoming and/or not?)

oh hello!! honestly, i really loved all the characters in spiderman: homecoming. and i’m gonna be so extra right now and like…give mini headcanons for all my babes. so i’m sorry in advance. but like…

we have our decathlon team babies

so like…liz is totally the mama bear. she’s the only senior on the team because she was one of the founding members her junior year and her friends were all too busy focusing on their other extracurriculars and college apps so it was just a bunch of little freshman she’d managed to convince to join the team

and liz did so much research and trained the team and asked her cousin who won a decathlon competition when he was in high school what was helpful for their team

so she takes over and gets mr. harrington to work with the team and she shapes the team into one that could win

and they’re all her babies like let’s be honest

charles and abraham are the twins that are attached at the hip but never stop fighting. they’re the dynamic duo and what abraham doesn’t know, charles does. they’re best friends and they hang out all the time and they obsess over star trek and have a secret rivalry going on with ned and peter because they are the star wars kids. and they’re sworn to hate each other until the end of time. (but also charles and abraham will freak out when the trailer for the last jedi gets released and immediately text the group chat nerds in space to ask peter and ned what they thought.) and abraham has to smack charles on the head when the boy catches his friend staring at sally for too long and charles just mumbles something about how she had something on her shirt and it’s fine.

and then you have sally and cindy. who are just like…so done with the team half the time. like, you’ve got peter, ned, charles, and abraham who just spend all their time obsessing over space themed movies. and flash just constantly berates everyone. michelle is lowkey kinda scary. (they are also lowkey in love with her but shhh.) and liz is like…well, liz is their mom so they love liz. but even mr. harrington is a mess. but sally and cindy make the best of it because they love each other and they love decathlon and they watch a week’s worth of jeopardy together every sunday and they quiz each other in cindy’s mom’s car on the way to school. and they talk about sally’s small, minuscule crush on charles (”really, sally? charles??? he’s a nerd!!” “you think i don’t know that and am also disappointed in myself!!” “oh my goodness but you guys would be so cute who am i kidding”) and they talk about cindy’s very large crush on betty brant (”cindy, she totally checked you out just now!!” “wHAT? omg, how is my hair??”). and they talk about which classes they’re taking so they can be in most of the same classes and they talk about college and their hearts lowkey break when they think about how cindy wants to stay in new york and sally wants to go to the west coast but they’ll be bffs forever so they have hope. (”we have skype, it’ll be okay, yeah?”)

and then you have flash. and flash has got so much shit going on like wtf dude. his parents are super wealthy and try to support him and try to be there but they’re always traveling for work and he’s basically been raised by his nanny. so it’s his nanny who pesters him about this massive crush he has on someone on the decathlon team because each day she picks him up from decathlon practice he’s always raging and sighing and looking sad. and flash just vehemently denies this. because that’s ridiculous, please don’t suggest something like that. but she knows him so well. she’s raised him. she just doesn’t realize that it’s fucking peter parker. peter parker who he terrorizes because he doesn’t want to deal with how he’s feeling. peter parker who has a great ass that he couldn’t help but slap that one time before nationals on the way to the pool. peter parker, who’s a dork and definitely not worthy of flash’s attention but has it anyway. so, maybe he’s not dealing healthily. but he’s got a silent war raging in his head and he doesn’t want to have to tell his parents that he’s bi because once his dad had made an offhand comment and it decided things for him. so flash just…rages and hides behind his wealth and intelligence and snaky comments. because he doesn’t wanna deal with anything

and omg i’ve talked about peter and mj and even ned a bit so i won’t write about them here but i love my babies so much okay???

we also have our peter parker protection squad

may parker, the loml. who’s characterization i can never get bc we have civil war may and then also homecoming may. but may parker who is a hero in her own right because we all know about that scene where she saves a little girl and doesn’t mention it that got cut from the movie. (rip me, honestly.) and like…can we talk about may?? because she seems like such a groovy, fun loving person. and she was married to her husband ben. they were totally wild in college or something. just…always doing crazy shit and laughing and having sex and just enjoying being with each other. and then they get married and get jobs and live together, being happy little hippies. (maybe they partake in some substances, idk, you never know.) and then her husband’s brother and wife die and they’re taking in peter parker. and may falls in love with this little boy because he’s so…good. and she and ben raise him as their own and try to give him an exciting and happy childhood and encourage his interests in science and his friendship with ned. and then he tells them he’s joining the decathlon team and there’s a field trip and he’s so excited about life. and then he acts all dodgy and then ben dies. and like…may is heartbroken. because ben was her person. and peter’s stopped talking to her. but then he gets the stark internship (which he didn’t tell her about, so rude) and then he’s happy and if he’s happy then she’s happy because she takes every good thing she can these days because they are so far and few between. so she takes every little piece of happiness she can find in life. like talking to mr. delmar and chatting with his daughter she’s she in the shop. like the woman who sells flowers on the corner on her way to work. like the cute couple that works at the supermarket by the apartment who give her recipes like ones for walnut date bread. and even like tony stark, who for whatever reason has become peter’s mentor of sorts and who makes him happy. and if someone makes her nephew happy, they make her happy

and dad!tony. who gives his spider son anything he wants and invites him upstate every so often so he can train with the avengers and learn to control his powers. because even if he isn’t going to be an avenger, he’s still going to be your friendly neighborhood spiderman. and he throws peter parker a birthday party in the summer at a fancy restaurant he’s bought out for the night. and all of peter’s little high school friends come and tony’s happy to give this to peter because the kid just needs to be a kid and needs to be happy. and don’t think tony doesn’t notice the way peter’s eyes follow that girl michelle all night. the girl who’s also asking him all these questions about the sokovia accords and his decision to move upstate and how he almost let a bunch of avenger and alien tech get stolen and about wakanda and if he’s ever been. and tony just wishes peter good luck at the end of the night and smiles because the boy is so confused. (if peter doesn’t realize it yet, oh goodness, good luck to this boy, honestly.) and tony pulls some strings to make sure that peter gets into mit and then finds out that he didn’t even need to because peter’s already a great candidate. and when he helps peter move into his dorm and sees michelle there, who just so happens to go to harvard down the block, well, peter just smiles and wishes peter good luck again

happy hogan disappointed me and doesn’t get to have a whole paragraph. but he can REDEEM HIMSELF later on because peter is a smol bean and needs protection and happy starts answering his calls and listening to his voicemails. and maybe happy laughs occasionally at the lame jokes peter makes, but that’s bESIDE THE POINT

and then just like...our small mentions

aaron davis exists in mcu and mentioned his nephew MILES MORALES. like, dude, idek what they’re gonna do with miles morales but i am soooo hype. idek. i am just so excited. bc donald glover was inspired as aaron davis. (“i like bread!) he was such a cool character and i wanna know if he becomes the prowler. and i wanna see him with his family and talking to his little nephew about how he met spiderman twice and he was like…a chill dude and he’s doing his part to keep their home safe. and miles morales is probably like…the biggest fan of spiderman and dresses up as him for halloween and then one day he gets bitten by this crazy huge spider while visiting his favorite uncle aaron and he starts developing superpowers? like omg this is his greatest dream come true? and then he starts going out in hopes of finding spiderman so he can team up with the dude that once saved his uncle. and then one day he’s trying to stop a mugging and spiderman comes and is just like…”what??” so they stop the muggers and then they go to a rooftop and spiderman is super confused like, “what? you have my powers?? how did this happen?” and miles is just like, “omg! you’re the spiderman! you’re my hero! omg! hi, i just want to help!!” and then maybe we get an older and younger brother dynamic between the two? idk i’m just excited to see what happens because they have to put miles morales in mcu. it’s decided

also i don’t think she’s gonna be in mcu but i love my baby gwen stacy. my smart beautiful dorky bean gwen. and i love when she’s put into fics. and she was put into this fic as liz allan’s love interest and it was inspired and i fell in love. so. yes. #putgweninfic2k17

not sure if this is what you were asking for but here it is anyway!