#literally the worst timeline

[cuddlesdotgif]

The way everyone is feeling about the Nickelodeon documentary is exactly how people are going to feel about exploitive ‘family-bloggers’ in less than 10 years once those kids are old enough to speak out on it.

We have seen it with the TLC Kate plus 8 and Duggar bullshit already.

This abnormal culture of celebrity worship and the perpetuation of this ‘sponsored by late stage capitalism’ lifestyle as one of the only means left to secure a comfortable living is unconscionable.

We banned circus freak shows in like the 20s and it took less than 100 years to rebrand them - except instead of a desperate man biting the head off a chicken to shock a crowd, now we scare small children for engagement on reaction vids on your FYP.

[azrealini]

can't stand living in a timeline where someone can say they hate a seasonal drink can enter a pipeline discussion into woman-dominated fields being paid less

[flaphack]

brendon urie sees his bank account is in the low millions and panic at the disco starts calling to him like the green goblin mask

[queenhelenblackthorn]

the Israeli government is casually announcing that they are about to commit genocide in Gaza and no one is doing anything to stop them. in fact several countries, including the US, have stated their unequivocal support of Israel over and over again. humans refuse to learn anything from history and a surprising amount of people have no empathy for others.

[xxrat--punkxx]

In light of uh... Recent trigun events on twitter, here's a tihylttw and trigun crossover

[andromeda3116]

look, i know everyone said that the new interview with the vampire show was incredible but holy shit i was not prepared for how incredible this show is

like, not only is louis interesting now, he is incredibly compelling! his once-bland internal dilemma is now given actual weight because it's not just the same old Thou Shalt Not Kill But I Am Hungry story, it's tempered through his righteous fury at how black people have been treated all these years, how many people have wronged him and laughed and expected him to laugh along, how his ties to the community that once saved him are now turning to nooses around his throat, how his family that he once provided for and relied on have now come to fear him

that, combined with his explicit homosexuality, and with lestat being the only one who seemed to accept him and love him for all that he is, and how that is both comforting and incredibly toxic and combined with sam reid's insane charisma and mania and gravity as lestat that make it completely understandable why louis would still be drawn to him in spite of everything

and how they've used the changes from the original to this one to examine how memory shifts regarding someone who was so intense and formative in your life even if they were ultimately so controlling and abusive but still left such huge gouges in your personality like knives

like

fuck

this is the best-written show i have seen in a long time like this is top-tier writing holy shit

[captainmaxatx]

I feel like we are all sleeping on the fan fiction potential given to us from Deadpool and Wolverine using their bodies to make a circuit with matter and anti-matter

Who knows what that could do to a person, you could write a fic where that caused anything your heart could think up.

[just-another-colin-kinnie]

Zane’s greatest fear is losing his humanity And they did That to him in the movie

[megamindsupremacy]

i know you have stan figure out ford is his estranged twin whom he lost memories of but the ‘just doesn’t realise he has a twin despite working to open the portal’ angle is so funny to me . alternate au path 🙏

guy doesnt call home or anything for thirty years, never meets the twins at birth & their parents are still like… messy divorce or super estranged great uncle who wont answer our calls. … great uncle it is. divorce leads children to the worst places.. (gravity falls)

dipper: are you even our grunkle?!?

stan, ‘knowing’ full well he just stole someone else’s identity that is probably their ‘actual grunkle’: well. you see.

. also him looking @ the twins being twins & going why do i have such deep-seated sadness & anger at this fact. at the very concept of twin siblings… WELL! guess i will never know!

oh okay okay wait what if. parent's are like "messy divorce or living with their grandpa for a summer" but shermie is like. hey wow i'm so sorry but actually i [insert reasonable and inflexible excuse here] so I cannot take care of the kids for the summer. however i have this brother he's a scientist and has an insane amount of PhDs and he lives in this lovely little town in Oregon and I'm sure he would love to host the kids for the summer 🥰 (this is shermie's master plan to get Stan to actually fucking talk to the family again it's been so long man cmon). And pines parents are like Okay We Trust You Let's Go Ship Our Children Off To Oregon and bada bing bada boom Stan has two kids now

even funnier is if shermie is just as insane as his brothers even though he doesn't act like it so he just. didn't tell stan the twins were coming. he assures the parents that he's been in contact w stan this whole time and has worked everything out but no he's just going to let stan get some surprise grand-niblings for the summer.

also. stan, looking at dipper and mabel's deep Twin Bond: this creates no strong emotions in me and I don't have any particular feelings about the concept of being a twin. anyways back to this portal i've been frantically trying to repair for three decades for some deep-seated-yet-unknown reason. surely these things have no relation!

[crimeronan]

trading our scheduled hunter awfulness for some luz awfulness. come on this journey with me

concept: offshoot of the worst timeline. hunter is "dead," or at least luz truly believes he is. she's trapped in the human world with belos. he has yet to get hit by a train and/or fall off a cliff, luz has yet to try to escape because she Does Not Care. they're in some abandoned cabin way deeper in the woods than the old house in gravesfield (because in the suburbs i think the neighbors would call the cops).

this is an Extremely unpleasant time period that doesn't bear thinking about, unless you're me and having a terrible pain day and need to think about your blorbos having a worse day than you are. belos is awful. luz is miserable. everything sucks. et cetera

after like, i dunno, three or four whole weeks of luz still being Despondent (and Boring), belos is like. well. this is ridiculous. you've had plenty of time to grieve. time to get over it!!

luz does Not get over it. obviously.

belos does what any concerned parent would do. & sources a pair of memory tweezers. (he Must have brought them with him, tbh. for "just in case".)

and then. proceeds to start burning her memories of hunter.

[the-fastest-things-alive]

Hey!

This blog is centered around our fic, the Fastest Things Alive, which began as a chat fic and is currently spiraling wildly beyond our control. We each write a group of characters, and have thrown together the games, comics(yes, all three), movies, shows and other various media as it strikes our interest. On this blog you can interact with your favorite characters, ask questions about the fic, and generally just vibe with us!

We try to update the fic around once a month, typically on Sundays, but don't expect a particular date. We aren't that organized.

Here's the first chapter! It's about 2k, and a fairly light read. This thing started as a chatfic... yeah. Yeah.

And the hellspawn! Organzied by who plays who! This list stays consistent with the point the fic is at(currently chapter 15), so minor spoilers ahead.

@ivythesnivy

KnightOfTheWind: Modern/IDW Sonic

ClassicVibes: Classic Sonic

X-tremeEscapist: Sonic X

FutureFrontier: someone help this man

ChaoticEquilibrium: a little shit

AberrantAdventure: I think this one's worse

@vixiyne

VivalaRevolution: Archie Sonic

Youshouldseemeinacrown: A post genesis wave au Scourge, he's so depressed I stg

SpaceCop: Zonic the Zone Cop

MachMeInADenny'sParkingLot: Boom two, electric boogaloo. Don't ask. Or do!

@yourfreindlynighborhoodspycrab

NotGonnaRuleYouCantMakeMe: Underground Sonic

@umbrenshadow

SunshineHog: Sunny(Fleetway Super Sonic, post split)

TheUltimateKnightform: Sir Lancelot(SatBK)

VoidHopper: Void Scourge. Scourge of the void... another post genesis wave Scourge. We're starting a collection.

We also have a discord server! Come chat with us! We're building lore archives and post BtS if y'all are interested!!!

https://discord.gg/4xwAXxyG

And with that, welcome to the mulitversal Sonic chatfic to end all chatfics!

[duckduckbuckley]

I am forging my way through The Swarm (which is seriously terrible) and I have to say there is potential for a Tommy helicopter crash parallel. The movie opens with two helicopters crashing after being swarmed and would be an interesting plot twist. (I highly doubt it will happen but thought the opening was ironic). Going to attempt to watch Airport 1975 next and hope to god it doesn’t suck as much. Fyi I’m concerned with Tim’s movie viewing choices but alas I have something to do with my night.

[marisatomay]

[angelstrawbabie420]

grief will have you saying shit like goddamn and fuck maybe the abuse was worth it

[batsplat]

from the stuff i’ve heard marc’s former honda teammates (dani jorge and pol in their media careers but joan also i guess) say about him now that they’re racing is generally quite positive, both on a professional/riding level but also seemingly on a personal level? i’m wondering what you make of that given that, yeah, marc doesn’t seem like a very good teammate (unless you’re alex who i’ve left off this list). like MARC wants to separate on and off track stuff and it seems like all of these guys are willing too at least in retrospect, so he can’t have truly burned bridges with them. do you have any thoughts on that

(x, x) most riders are quite good at not burning bridges with each other! it's not like marc's competitors don't know that this stuff is kinda part of the game. I mean, all of marc's past teammates were also trying to assert themselves within the internal hierarchy... you can say that certain teammates engage in 'worse' behaviour than others, but, like, these people do understand they're supposed to be fighting each other! a baseline degree of nastiness is factored in and will be accepted to a greater or lesser extent by your rivals - especially when it comes to asserting yourself in intra-team power struggles. you might hate the other guy in the moment, but generally speaking once the active part of the rivalry is done with... you will probably get over it. marc's fellow riders are aware of how ultra-competitive marc is - and to a certain point they do respect it, not least because they're aware that this is part of the reason why marc has ended up with all those titles. it's like dani said, right, it's marc's strong suit. and in general, you do have to say that there's relatively few teammate pairings that devolve to the level of toxicity that it completely destroys the interpersonal relationship. you might need some level of preexisting animosity... most of the purely competitive sins can be healed with a little time

on the 'separating on-track and off-track' thing... well. this is kind of a question of how you define these things, you can say that marc generally speaking isn't going to massively hold grudges over isolated on-track incidents or whatever... but he doesn't just leave his fighting to the track, and personally I've also never felt he can entirely separate these things out in his mind. can you really say his professional and private relationships with other riders are completely detached from one another? mostly, he's opted to be pretty disengaged from his fellow riders as a collective, and obviously that's a good way to not take things too personally... it's all part of the game, isn't it? sometimes it's good to go with the straightforward approach: marc tells you he will make your life hell, he does indeed make your life hell, and then you both move on with your lives and can maybe actually have a pretty amiable relationship with him in years to come. he's not really defying your expectations at any point here, is he now? it's still a question for each of them as individuals as to whether they think that kind of behaviour is above board and acceptable or not... but everyone by now knows that marc plays these games, so it's not like they're going in blind

and it's not like other former teammates are constantly badmouthing each other. I mean... look, let's just cut to the chase here and bring in valentino as our reference point (as he is for the sport as a whole, which by the way does also help create a certain baseline of acceptability for marc's antics - maybe goated riders are just supposed to be dicks who knows). vale's premier class teammates were 1) nobody (2000-01), 2) tohru ukawa (2002), 3) nicky hayden (2003; 2011-12), 4) carlos checa (2004), 5) colin edwards (2005-2007), 6) jorge lorenzo (2008-10; 2013-16), 7) maverick vinales (2017-20), 8) franco morbidelli (2021), and 9) andrea dovizioso (2021). of these eight men (let's just exclude 'nobody' for now), do you know how many had serious complaints at any point about valentino as a teammate? that's right, it's one guy. one. some of valentino's other teammates, like hayden, checa and edwards, were even quite actively positive about their whole experience. this is the thing - you do need some specific circumstances for teammate rivalries to escalate from 'being kinda bitchy every other month' to 'actively fantasising about stabbing each other'. not accounting for natural interpersonal animosity, let's list some circumstantial factors that you need to get a bridge-burning-worthy level of feud:

you need a competitive bike. it is possible to beef about development direction when you're in the trenches (cf late 2010's yamaha, 2020's honda)... but generally speaking this is going to be quite low-level petty stuff, not actual war

you also need something that approaches competitiveness between teammates. if one teammate is unquestionably stronger than the other one, then it is very unlikely that you are going to get any open hostilities. the tension comes when the two sides are close enough to each other for the internal hierarchy to actually be a contentious issue (this is also basic self preservation... if you're the far weaker teammate then you do not want to make the situation troublesome, because then you will be the one to be fired)

following on from those first two things... well, it doesn't hurt to have a title fight in the mix. there are also other ways you can generate competitive stakes, like, for instance, if you and your teammate know that one of you will be out of a job soon. basically, it helps to have something to squabble over

it is maybe easy to forget how rare it is this century for teammates to be fighting directly for a title, let alone over the course of multiple seasons. only two 1-2's since the year 2000 and they're both for the factory yamaha's (though 2006, 2011-13 and 2017 did all prominently feature two factory hondas). which means that for valentino, the prerequisites were met just the once in his premier class career... and yes, the results were pretty memorable, but (topic! for! another! post!) it's worth pointing out that even that relationship was pretty much 'fine' whenever there was a sizeable disparity between the two of them performance-wise (2008 and 2013 are the most clear cut examples). I think the way I'd frame it with marc is that he has a bunch of mildly dubious strategies up his sleeve to assert himself within the team, which don't really deviate that far from what you'd expect from a rider of marc's calibre and only need to be escalated under specific circumstances. that doesn't mean he doesn't have the potential to be ruthless, but up until now it's mostly been a fairly 'acceptable' level of ruthlessness on the intra-team level... and not something that is likely to make other riders actually hate him

taking marc's teammates one by one... dani was the closest to meeting the bridge-burning prerequisites, though he was only a title rival in marc's rookie season. and marc did go further with him than he did with anyone else, and dani has made some pointed comments about marc's style as a teammate... but yes, he is fonder of marc these days. partly I'd just emphasise again that this is a fairly natural progression when you've stopped directly competing for long enough, and partly it's also just a question of individual personality - dani's not massively into holding grudges. then there's jorge, who... I mean, they might as well not have been teammates, given that jorge was either too slow or too injured to even be sharing any track space with marc. you have to put that one down primarily to circumstance, seeing as jorge's own track record on the teammate front isn't exactly spotless. marc and jorge beefing in 2019 would have been pretty dumb and also a massive waste of everyone's time in a year in which marc singlehandedly won the team's championship. even those two needed more to get things going

moving on to the dark years, pol and marc had an extremely stop-and-start partnership on a honda that was generally pretty uncompetitive... so the only stuff they could get ever so mildly irritable about were riveting incidents like 'marc saying pol wasn't the biggest championship threat' (neither of them were) or 'pol saying he'd copy marc's set up' (which proved entirely useless). not exactly title decider territory, is it now, and marc very much had pol covered as a challenger throughout their partnership. also, those two do have a longer history! they've known each other since they were kids and hold a pretty significant place in each other's careers. now that pol's more or less retired, it's natural there'll be quite a lot of sentimentality there - which will paper over any small cracks that appeared during those two years. and joan was a one year teammate at a time in which the bike was consistently close to offing them both. they only managed to start a sunday race together as teammates on thirteen occasions. it would take some serious effort to engineer a feud with that little opportunity, and, really, why on earth would you bother. maybe if honda had gone for rinsy rather than joan for the factory seat, it could've been a bit more prickly, but it's unlikely that it would have escalated beyond that

this is the thing, right, the only one of these partnerships that would have been worth burning bridges over was dani, and even there marc pretty much had him handled after the first season. in general, marc has been pretty clear on how he's not interested in making friends with the other side of the garage while the teammate relationship is ongoing... which is fine! there's some prominent-ish teammate pairings that are actually good friends, some teammate pairings where one of them is actively helping out and advising the other one, but some riders prefer to just keep their distance. it would have been a little silly of marc to start a feud with a teammate who is galaxies away from being a competitive threat, let alone a title rival, but generally it is possible to toe the line between 'attempting to suppress your internal rivals enough to stop them from becoming a problem for you' and 'taking radical enough action to make your internal rivals despise you'

especially in the post-dani era, marc never really had any need to push things too far... and, let's face it, how many of your teammate relationships end up with burnt bridges is also quite frankly a question of luck and circumstance. do you want to guess which top rider on paper has the worst track record this century with premier class teammate feuds, in terms of a) how many they've had, and b) how little public reconciliation there has been since the end of the rivalry?

yes, that's right, it's the first name that comes to mind when you're thinking of toxic and conflict-prone riders: andrea dovizioso. that old devil, constantly causing trouble. just couldn't stop undermining his poor, innocent teammates. can somebody please stop this ruthless bully before it's too late

I think you get the point. I would personally suggest that dovi is not in fact the worst teammate it is possible to have in a motogp top team. he just happened to find himself in a situation where he was teammates with two separate guys he did not click with at all, in situations that involved a pairing of riders who were (or had the potential to be) competitive with each other, as well as some proper stakes attached to the rivalry. in general, situational factors are going to determine this stuff more than anything else... and marc more often than not does have a reasonably good feel for picking his battles. he's flirted with the line, but he's mostly avoided crossing it. he hasn't had to

[sonicfrontiers]

watched one youtube video on how to improve at drawing and my recs are suddenly fucking filled with the most insane art videos and channels ever. what on earth. do people actually live like this