#literally cried because i’m so excited and i’m not even going until july | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

lwt28brave · 3 years ago

Text

LT2 masterpost

If it was up to me, we would get an autumn or winter EP. Since it’s not up to me at all, here, enjoy this post with everything we know so far of LT2, which is to say, not much at all. Everything here is hypothetical. I’ll be updating every time I see something relevant. A little disclaimer that while this is a masterpost (kinda), it could be read as discourse (duh, it’s also a theory), AND it’s also by me, and you shouldn’t expect me to be serious at this point.

Due to me restraining myself, there’s no reference to any of the times he’s mentioned his guitar skills and him improving but I hope you know I cried every single time.

I’m also linking my old pinned here. It was written before AFHF and around the free merch thing that didn’t lead to much, but I still think I made some good points.

Possible tracks:

Copy of a Copy of a Copy

Change

Faith in the future??

369??

Possible names:

369

Faith in the future

When is the album coming out?

Your guess is as good as mine

Friday 28th of January 2022. Almost two years after Walls. It’s a Friday. It’s a 28th. What else can I say?

Here you can find @want-to-be-loved timelines for every month.

Here you can find @berlinini’s timeline of what Louis has been up to this year (2021).

The rest is under the cut. And here you can find a PDF version where Tumblr can't tell me how many pictures I can add.

2020

He said back on May 2th 2020 he wasn’t writing anything new yet.

(x)(x)(x)

Interestingly enough, he’s said many times after that that the album’s not ready cause he has no new experiences to drawn from. I won’t call him out because he does it himself.

May 4th. He liked a tweet from DMA’s Johnny Took saying they had to go write together again. Louis has been credited as an influence for them and (kind of) participated in their previous record, so I’m assuming he meant for their music and not his, but you never know.

Nothing(literally nothing??? how did we survive) until 11th of July. We all know what happened that day. We all celebrated it. Nonetheless, that’s not what I’m talking about here.

(x) So, by the beginning of July 2020 he was working on concepts and ideas for the new album. That was fifteen months ago. I know perfection takes time but…

Brief summary of important things that happened from then until the next mention of new music:

Louis left Syco!!!! 10 days later he rescheduled the tour for the first time. He followed Matt Vines on Twitter, probably so we could publicly shame him into doing something. Also, the 10thanniversary. He followed more people I wish he hadn’t.

Then more nothing until September. Not even a single tweet. The first merch drop was on the 28th of August but he just RT’ed the tweet. He first mentioned Free my Meal on the 25th of September. Then on October 1st Walls hit #1 on a lot of countries and Louis was incredibly happy and excited about it ^^

And then, that same day, October 1st, 2020, he dropped this bomb:

(x)

He also said it was too soon to be sharing new lyrics with us (x)

And, obviously, this tweet which is actually what made me start this whole post. I would hope you know mate.

(x)

He also told us he was cooking "banger after banger" and that he was incorporating more social themes into his music (x)(x) (I believe any social issue is a political issue but that’s not the point rn).

COPY OF A COPY OF A COPY?!?!

These next paragraphs are brought to you by my mind not remembering things and me not having any links. I’m assuming COACOAC came from those writing sessions that supposedly happened in October. Or in LA but I have no idea if he actually was in LA at any point other than a Daily Mail article putting him there on December which would have been too late, but I do remember that someone said he was in the studio in LA last autumn???? A rumor. Maybe. IDK. Did I mention already all of this is very hypothetical?? Well, this is it. I can’t even remember if this was October or November or what. So, take this with a grain of salt.

I’m also… taking the liberty to assume, if you must, that Copy wasn’t meant to be a Walls reject because it sounds more mature and darker and it has a vastly different tone that Walls songs. I know he’s said that song probably isn’t getting into the album, but I want to have faith (in the future) that I’m getting a studio version. (But also, Louis, if you’re reading this, first of all GET OUT OF MY BLOG second of all, please don’t ever feel pressured again to add a song to the album because we have already heard it before. It’s your art and it should always be under your own terms).

So yeah, I believe that Copy is either one of those four songs (then imagine the other three??!!) or was written around the 1st of October date.

---End of the Intermission---

Then not much important (other than sharing more about Marcus Rashford fight against food poverty and the 2nd merch drop) until he announced the livestream on the 24th of November. (x)

It wasn’t until a few days before the livestream date we even thought again about new music (jk, I know we’re always thinking about new Louis’ music). So, December 9th/10th, 2020. Nine months ago. We got our first taste of new music!

He made sure we knew Copy of a Copy of a Copy isn't a cover! (x) (x)

(x)

Ok, so that’s it for 2020. (I feel like I’m missing something from September 17th because tweet was deleted but maybe he was still talking about cucumbers. We might never know. Unless I understand how Tumblr tags work). Expected, cause Walls was released in 2020. We needed to let it sit for a while.

2021

Another Summary: Louis third tweet of the year was telling the UK government off. So was the fifth. What a good beginning. On the 26th of January, he said he prefers pancakes over waffles. I hope he meant pancakes other than his own. More importantly, he tweeted the infamous “you lot read into things too much”. Don’t get me started, Tomlinson. Don’t. Then the 31st came around and Walls was one. He tweeted this. How wise. And Project Defenceless happened!!

15th of February!! Who cares about Valentine Day when the next day we got this? ♥

(x)

So…AN EP?? AN EP?? PLEASE RELEASE AN EP.

“I’m sure I will have something out this year but unlikely that will be the album”. Unlikely but not impossible. Also. A single would be good. This is the second time he mentions releasing something in 2021 and he sounds surer about it than the first time around.

He also said that he isn’t sure we will get a studio version of Copy. And that the best bridges from Walls to LT2 are Walls, OTB, KMM and Copy. Can’t wait!

Then we jump to March 6th when he announced he was going to create his own management company. “Sometimes action is needed first to encourage the motivation and belief”. As we can tell he was already manifesting some stuff which will lead us to the numerology stuff/Tesla… kidding. Or not. We might never know.

On the 22nd of March he answered some questions:

He told us music was still his main focus ♥ mwha. (x) I included this tweet to guilt-trip him into giving us music in case he’s reading this even after I told him to leave. ILY.

(x) I’d love to get a visual EP this autumn. Just saying. It sounds like a lovely concept.

(x)

…next (I will get into it, I promise. I’m just mad).

On the 25th he left for Mexico until April 10th. You could assume it was just for the documentary where we got ten seconds of footage or admit the obvious: LT2 its a Mexican baby!!

On the 26th (so, not so far apart from that first 369) we got the first Faith in the Future mention: (x)

Back then we were innocent people who had no idea what was coming upon us. We still have no idea because what the fuck does he mean with these. Please explain. I have one braincell and I don’t use it enough for this. I’m linking some theories.

On the 30th of March he confirmed he was already working on the documentary. So AFHF was already on the works. Will it take this long for us to get the Veeps numbers? We also got this tweet: "Got a decent chorus idea down" (x).

Same person that got the “something out this year” exclusive. If you know something share with the class. Also. Is this Change? I feel like this could be Change but I also assume he wrote Change after hanging out with his friends or being in Doncaster. But who knows.

(x) And the second mention to 369.

(x) 15th of April. The second "Faith in the future".

On the 19th of April he announced that he had something BIG for us later on the year which turned out to be the Away From Home Festival ♥♥ (x) I love him so much.

Then on the 28th he announced the 369 merch drop (which it’s probably the Walls drop? Except that the TOU and KMM ones were “drop 1 and drop 2” and this was drop 369 which, again, makes no sense) but we still don’t know what 369 means.

Into May’ 21 we go.

He rescheduled tour again. And dropped another bomb (x).

He announced he has signed with BMG as an independent artist by RTing this tweet on May 10th. The article also says that he’s already working on writing and recording LT2. The timing… we don’t know. What this deal involves… we don’t know either. Bear with me here because I have a lot to say about this.

I think the deal is only a distribution one, but that BMG are interested in Louis and what he (us) could bring to the table. They were either present at the festival or watching it, but officially they had no involvement at all with it (everything is credited either to Louis own company, 78 Productions, or Charlie Lightening’s company). That’s the case for both giveaways too; the vinyl one and the tickets for the festival.

I think it would be an unbelievably bad move not to test the waters with BMG now or soon-ish. At least a single, to see how it performs. Due to the circumstances, it’s obvious there’re certain limitations on place but I want to see how they push it, whether the radio play exist this time around and if the song is playlisted and promoted and all that… I would also love to know, since it says he signed with BMG UK, but it also states it’s a global deal, how things are going to go on the US and other countries.

Yes, yes. I know those are all questions and no answers. But I know the same as you, sadly. If any of you know more than you’re letting on… again, share with the class.

Where was I? Yes, on the 25th of May Louis had a great day writing (x). Since the first time he had mentioned he was officially writing to this date there’s almost eight months. And I believe he was writing before October’ 20.

He followed Robert Harvey that day and, on the 28th of May (why is it always the 28th???) he was spotted at the studio for the first time.

June was an interesting month for the fandom ♥. Lots of LHL content which I will love and cherish for the rest of times. On June 4th, June 9th, and June 10th he was spotted at the studio, but I believe he was there more days.

(x)

This was posted on June 6th and captioned Studio. Charlie also shared it with “Mega tunes being put down, can’t wait for this @louist91 #louistomlinson #LT2” as the caption. This gives me 2019 (Elton-Joint) vibes. I like it. Feels like we’re getting closer to something.

He added the Milano date on the 9th too which I’m mentioning because I’m going alone. Anyone wanna go with me please? I’m nice and I never eat anything before a concert so you can have my food. On other news. It didn’t come home.

During July he was at the studio at least three days too. Probably more. Feels like more with all the fan pictures we got. Or was that June? Anyway, July 1st and 9th we got some videos from Robert Harvey and wearesuperhi, which is who Louis has been working with the most, that we know of. I don’t know for sure they’re from that day. And on July 5th we got an article and lots of pictures of Louis looking really good outside the studio.

On the 12th of July the first fans started getting the free, 369 bucket hat and print. We still don’t know what the purpose was other than to thanks fans. Maybe that was it. I want answers and I still think it relates to a future project (see theories above), but it could also just be a bridge with the Walls breaking.

He didn’t tweet about anything interesting for a while, mostly because he lost his phone (he either throwed it in the air or smashed it who knows). Then on the 29th of July he announced the festival!

I’m glossing over it because there’s already been a lot of talk about it (rightfully) and while it was a wonderful thing, it doesn’t have much to do with LT2.

Let’s talk Change!

On August 3rd he tweeted this about the setlist.

(x)

And this (x) on the 28th! I can’t stand him.

We didn’t get it, obviously. Because who was going to get that. But we read too much into things. Alright.

On the 16thof August Dave Gibson shared this post tagged #LT2 with the eyes emojis 👀👀👀. I believe this has to do both with Change but also with whatever else came out of that Mexico trip.

(x) Last relevant tweet related to LT2 is this one.

So, on the 30th of August we got Change and we cried, and we know that Change is going in the new album. He said it. With those exact words. He also said he was “getting a feeling for it”. This has to meant he already has a general idea of the vibe of the new album and what’s going in it!!!!!! (Right? RIGHT?).

Anyway, let’s go back a few weeks because some other things happened on August. He was at the studio a few more times. Or it was suggested that he was there. On the 17th and the 18th. (Why was it so time-pressing to be at the studio instead of rehearsing for the festival? There was no studio at all on the documentary. Which makes sense, but again, then why?).

On the day of the festival we got another mention of Faith in The Future that made me feel part of a cult ngl. The words were flashing on the screen for less than a second. Okay.

And then he tweeted those words again after watching the livestream/documentary on the 4th of September (x). This is what makes me suspect it's either the name of the album or of the single.

On the same day, we got some interesting quotes about LT2 on the documentary.

“Soon I’ll have to think about me second album, which in my head I’ll get the tour out of the way and then I’ll address that. So, I hadn’t really given it much thought, to be honest”.

“When every day is the same is hard to feel creative and it’s hard to have any kind of proper inspiration”.

“As season started to come back, I started writing again and it was great and some of these songs turned out alright”.

And I think this is it. I might be overlooking some important details but that’s what we know and what we don’t know.

So. Conclusions. That’s what you missed on Glee. I do believe the album is, if not mostly done, partially there. And yes, this post is pointless and never-ending but it’s all in here if you need to tell Louis “Hey, you said this, mate”.

#LT2 #Louis Tomlinson #Faith in The future #369 #Louis #LT #new music #idk what this is #but it's long #pinned

90 notes · View notes

nicknellie · 4 years ago

Text

Anonymous requested: “tricked into 7 minutes in heaven at a party” AU with willex, where theyre close friends and apart of the same friend group, and their friends know they both like each other and are tired of watching them dance around each other so they devise a plan to have a party and play seven minutes in heaven, and get them to be alone together in a closet or room or something. so a sort of getting together/modern AU with some kissing cause the boys deserve it?

I had to Google what 7 Minutes In Heaven is. Anyway!! I love this prompt so much, it’s so so sweet. We love some getting together fluff. Thank you so much for suggesting it!

Title from Alone by Heart.

The Secret Is Still My Own

Alex could have kicked himself for not realising what this was much earlier. It was probably Luke’s idea. Maybe Julie’s – she could be sneaky when she wanted to be. It didn’t really matter who had devised the plan, all that Alex was worried about now was the fact that he was about to spend seven minutes locked in a small room with Willie and the likelihood was that it was going to be utterly dreadful.

A few months ago when Alex and Willie had first met, it wouldn’t have been so awful. Their friendship had been fresh and exciting and there had been an easy banter flowing between the two of them that made Alex feel light and giddy. He had been glad to spend time with Willie then, looking for every excuse to hang out with him because who wouldn’t? Willie was funny, kind, intelligent, and everything good in the world. Alex would have been mad to not want to spend time with him. It didn’t take long for Alex to realise he was falling for Willie, quickly and with no signs of stopping.

And he made the grave mistake of telling that to Luke.

“Dude,” Luke had said, grabbing Alex’s shoulders. “You gotta ask him out!”

“What? No!” Alex had protested. He tried to wriggle free but Luke’s grip was like iron and he gave up after a moment or two. “I don’t want to. I like being friends with him.”

“Yeah, but imagine if you were more than friends,” Luke pressed, grinning wildly. “It’s not like he’d say no – he’s head over heels for you, man.”

“He is?”

“I think so.”

“That’s not proof,” Alex deadpanned. “You also thought that if you ate watermelon seeds one would grow inside you. Then you cried when Reggie ate them.”

“That was ages ago!” Luke whined.

“It was last week, but alright.”

“Alright, fine, I’m a bad example,” Luke admitted. “But what if I told you that Julie thinks Willie likes you?”

Alex considered it for a moment. Julie was definitely more reliable than Luke, and where Luke was almost definitely guessing about whether or not Willie had feelings for Alex, Julie had probably spoken to Willie herself to find out. So he shrugged and gave Luke a short nod.

“Does she think so?” he asked, trying to keep the hope out of his voice.

“Dude,” Luke scoffed. “She was the one to point it out to me. You and Willie are made for each other, bro! Ask him out or I’ll have to do it for you.”

Alex hadn’t asked Willie out. It hadn’t been because he didn’t want to or because he didn’t think Luke and Julie were right – it was because he simply didn’t know how. How was he supposed to go up to Willie, a literal angel, and ask him on a date without spontaneously combusting? He didn’t want to make a fool of himself, not in front of Willie.

He had thought that Luke was joking about getting Alex and Willie together himself. That had, of course, been an incredibly naïve thing to believe. When Luke said he’d do something, he meant it – Alex should have learnt that from the time Luke had said he would lick an electric fence and then followed through immediately and without hesitation. So really he shouldn’t have been surprised when Luke made it his mission to get Alex and Willie together.

The first time it had happened was when Alex and Willie were hanging out alone in the studio. They had been talking, just catching up with each other, and it had been nice. Willie had been halfway through a story about one of the kids at the nursery he worked part-time at when all of a sudden the lights in the studio had dimmed and slow, romantic music had begun drifting from the stereo in the corner.

Willie had looked utterly bemused, a quiet half-smile gracing his features. “What’s all this?”

“I don’t know,” Alex told him, standing up and flicking the lights back on, then going to the stereo and turning the music down all the way. “Sorry about that. It’s never happened before.”

“You mean you didn’t set it up?” Willie asked.

“No,” Alex replied, looking around the studio. Unsurprisingly, he had spotted Luke in the attic, hidden amongst the beanbags, the stereo’s remote in his hands. He didn’t even have the good grace to look guilty, instead giving Alex a cheery wave.

“Oh,” Willie had said. His tone made Alex turn to face him – there was something in it he couldn’t quite put a name to. “Okay. Anyway, so, as I was saying…”

Luke’s plans had not improved from then on. He had pulled the classic “invite both of them to hang out but don’t show up so they’re just spending time together one-on-one”, he had dedicated an entire setlist to Willie at their most recent gig and told the entire crowd that it had been Alex’s idea, and every time Alex and Willie had a conversation he would find a way to muscle in and very unsubtly suggest they go on a date.

It was making Alex’s life a misery.

Because now every time he saw Willie felt painstakingly awkward. The both of them were just waiting for Luke to show up and do whatever he’d planned, after which they’d be steeped in brittle, tense silence until one of them found an excuse to back out of the situation. The ease and light-heartedness their friendship had once been built on was pretty much shot to pieces. Alex knew that Luke meant well, but he was almost certain that he had ruined everything.

It didn’t help that Luke had got Julie, Reggie, and Flynn in on it too, though they were much less heavy-handed than he was when it came to getting them together. Reggie’s main tactic was ask if they’d been on a date yet every time he saw them but leave it alone once they said no, while Julie and Flynn tended to talk to Alex away from Willie and try and convince him that they were, in Flynn’s words, a match made in heaven.

“He totally wants you to ask him out,” Flynn gushed on one of these occasions. “Did you see the way he was looking at you earlier? He’s in love.”

“Things are awkward enough between us as it is,” Alex had explained. “I’m not going to make it worse by asking him out.”

“Well, maybe you don’t need to ask him on a date,” Julie suggested, ever the voice of reason. Alex inwardly thanked her – at least somebody was on his side. “But I do think you need to at least talk about what’s going on between you.”

He revoked his inward thank-you.

“We don’t need to talk,” Alex insisted. “If we just leave it alone then the problem will eventually go away.”

“That’s always your solution,” Julie said.

“And it never works,” Flynn added.

“If you just face your feelings head-on and actually try communicating with him you might get somewhere,” Julie said. Alex looked at her and knew she was telling the truth – her eyes were wide and kind, her mouth set into a gentle smile, and she looked as if she wanted nothing more than to help Alex. “You’ve been dancing around each other for so long, all you need to do is figure out where you both are. Trust me.”

He had shrugged inelegantly and let Flynn change the direction of the conversation, grateful to be talking about something else.

But he hadn’t taken Julie’s advice. Talking to Willie was difficult. Their banter was all but gone and their conversations lasted no more than a few minutes at most. It was a lot easier when they were with all their friends, in a big group where they could talk to others, which had been exactly the reason that Alex wasn’t worried about the impromptu party Julie had invited everyone to that night.

And look where it had got him.

It had been Luke who suggested it during a lull in conversation.

“Why don’t we play Seven Minutes in Heaven?”

The suggestion had been met with excited ‘ooooh’s from most of the group sat around the studio, all except Alex. The last time he’d played Seven Minutes in Heaven had been in middle school – he had been locked in a closet with a girl in his class, she had kissed him incredibly awkwardly, he had blurted “I’m too gay for this” and fallen ungracefully out of the closet with six minutes still left on the clock. While that had been years and years ago, the memory still burned with embarrassment.

“Count me out,” he said. “That game is cursed.”

“I think you’re thinking of Bloody Mary in the Mirror,” Reggie supplied. “That game is cursed. This one’s just a bit of fun.”

“Absolutely not,” Alex said, shaking his head. “You guys can play, I’m staying out of it.”

“Oh, come on, Alex,” whined Luke, “everyone has to play! Otherwise it’s no fun.”

“You might not even get picked,” Julie said helpfully.

“But also you might,” Luke added.

Alex looked around the room at his friends – Reggie was smiling encouragingly, Luke looked put-out that Alex had even thought about refusing, Julie and Flynn were looking at him with hope and excitement in their eyes that he really didn’t want to crush, and Willie… Willie was avoiding eye contact altogether.

He didn’t know what it was that did it, but finally he relented. “I’ll play.”

Luke punched the air triumphantly and began entering everyone’s names into a generator he’d brought up on his phone. Alex watched with bated breath as the little wheel spun, slowing down until it landed on a name. The screen lit up with an over-the-top fireworks animation and the name ‘WILLIE’ in garish bubble writing.

Alex didn’t look at Willie, but he did feel his own insides squirm. What if he was picked next? He wasn’t sure he could last seven minutes alone with Willie. What was he supposed to talk about? What was he supposed to do? How was he meant to act like it wasn’t the most awkward thing he’d ever done especially after everything that had happened in the past few months?

Luke set the spinner off again and Alex watched nervously as it ticked through all the names. The firework animation lit up the screen again and when it was cleared the name ‘ALEX’ was left behind, glowing in all its bubble writing glory.

He tried not to sigh in defeat and he stayed put, no matter how much he wanted to leg it from the room and never come back.

“Alright then!” Julie said, clapping her hands and beaming. “Alex and Willie! You guys feeling up for this?”

Alex didn’t have an answer, but it appeared that Willie did. He stood up and offered a hand to pull Alex to his feet too, smiling gently.

“I’m ready,” he said, though Alex didn’t miss the waver in his voice. “How about you, hotdog?”

He could feel his friends’ eyes boring into him like lasers, but kept his own eyes trained on Willie, searching his expression with no idea what he was actually searching for. Eventually though, he gave a resolute nod and said, “Yeah. Yeah, I’m ready. Let’s do this.”

“You can go into the bathroom,” Julie said, pointing towards the little room at the back of the studio. “You’ll have to lock the door yourselves.”

Alex nodded and mutely followed Willie into the bathroom. He shut and locked the door behind them, then flicked the light-switch on. Immediately, Willie flicked it back off.

“Why can’t we have the lights on?” he asked. “I can’t see you.”

“Those are the rules, hotdog,” Willie returned. His voice sounded like it was coming from the opposite side of the room, but Alex couldn’t be sure. After all, he couldn’t see anything.

He could feel his heart hammering in his chest and sweat starting to bead on his forehead as he slid himself down the wall to sit on the floor. He had no reason to feel so nervous right then; he’d been alone with Willie a thousand times, this didn’t have to be any different just because it was in a small dark room and they had a time limit ticking over their heads. Admittedly, he hadn’t been alone with Willie all that often recently, but he shouldn’t have been too out of practise.

“So,” he ventured, rubbing his hands along his legs, hoping the repetitive movements would dull his nerves. “What do you want to talk about?”

Willie was silent for a moment and Alex was sure that he’d somehow already put a foot wrong. Briefly, he considered unlocking the door and trying to leave very quietly so that Willie wouldn’t notice, but he realised quickly that plan wouldn’t work because he would never get past his friends in the studio. All he could do was stick it out for six and a half more minutes.

But mercifully, Willie finally spoke.

“Things have been weird recently, huh, hotdog?”

It teased a laugh from Alex, if only a small one. Because yes. Yes, things had been incredibly weird and he hated it.

“Yeah,” he agreed, “it’s been weird. I’m sorry about Luke and the others.”

“You don’t need to apologise,” Willie said. Alex could hear the smile in his voice and found himself relaxing. “It doesn’t really bother me. But… I mean, it seemed like it was bothering you. I’ve been trying to give you a little space but I don’t know if that’s what you want.”

“No,” Alex said, far too quickly. He tried to rein himself in a little, not wanting things to descend back into that dangerous awkward territory. “No, I don’t want you to give me space. I really like hanging out with you, Willie. I don’t want to stop that. I just wish they’d stop teasing.”

There was another pause, smaller this time, barely perceptible.

“Why?” Willie asked quietly.

“Because,” Alex began, but he quickly found himself lost for words.

How was he supposed to explain it to Willie when he found it hard to explain it to himself? He didn’t like their teasing because he was scared. He didn’t like their teasing because he didn’t want to make Willie uncomfortable. He didn’t like their teasing because this thing, whatever it was, between him and Willie was theirs and only theirs and he wanted to keep it between that way. Because he wanted to make these decisions on his terms, not when his friends decided he should.

“Because?” Willie prompted.

Alex swallowed his pride and his nerves and made himself speak.

“Because I really like you, Willie. And when our friends try and find ways to get us together it just feels awful because I want to do it myself. I don’t want them to intervene or mess this up. I want to do it my way. They keep saying that you like me too – is that true?”

Silence again. Alex could hardly stand it.

“Yeah,” Willie said finally. With that single word Alex felt like he could breathe more easily than ever before. “I do. Like you, I mean. And I get it. I’m sorry this whole thing has been such a mess.”

Alex huffed a laugh. “Blame Luke.”

“Oh, I will,” Willie replied through a chuckle.

Alex heard him shuffle across the bathroom floor and felt their sides press together as Willie came to sit next to him. Without thinking he laid his head down on Willie’s shoulder, then felt Willie rest his head on his in return.

“So,” Alex said again. “What does this mean for us?”

“What do you want it to mean?” Willie asked teasingly, the smile on his face evident in his voice.

“Are we dating?” he asked. He could feel his own smile tugging at his lips as Willie slipped an arm around his shoulders.

He felt Willie press a gentle kiss to the top of his head. “Yes, Alex. We’re dating.”

Maybe it was the late hour, maybe it was the dark room, maybe it was the rush of adrenaline he got from hearing Willie day the words “we’re dating”, but something gave him a warm and welcome rush of courage and he said, before he could think better of it, “Can I kiss you?”

“Well,” Willie said, “I think that’s what usually happens in this game.”

“I don’t want to kiss you because of the game,” Alex told him. He knew Willie was probably joking, but he wanted to be certain. He wanted to make it clear that none of this was because of the game (mainly because Luke had probably rigged it somehow and Alex still wanted to do this his own way). He needed to show that this was for Willie and for himself, nothing else.

“I know,” Willie said gently. “I don’t either. I just want to kiss you.”

Alex slid a hand up to cup Willie’s jaw and they slowly came together. Willie’s lips were softer than Alex thought should be allowed, the kiss gentle and slow. It felt perfect, like fireworks had been lit in Alex’s soul (though much better fireworks than the terrible animation on Luke’s random selector wheel). He felt Willie’s fingers knot through his hair and pull them closer together.

It hadn’t gone the way Alex would have really liked. He didn’t get to ask Willie out on his terms. But from now on, with Willie as his boyfriend, they could do everything else on their terms. They could go at their own speed, hand-in-hand, with no ticking time limit set by their friends. They could move at their own pace with nobody but each other.

And Alex could breathe easy.

Taglist (if you want to be added or removed just let me know): @ace-bookworm @williexmercer @willex-owns-my-heart @itstiger720 @the-reckless-and-the-brave @that-one-newsie @bluedarkness @lookingthroughmirrors @teammightypen @salty-star @julieandthequeers @lmaohuh @sunnysbright

114 notes · View notes

actualsunflower · 4 years ago

Text

I have a huge life update to share rn--- My top surgery consultation is scheduled for July 5th!!!! I’M SO EXCITEDDDDDDDDDDD!!!!!!! I’ve also been vaccinated!! :D ANNNDDD MY LEGAL NAME AND SEX HAVE BEEN CHANGEDD!!!!! :DDDD kind of a lot has happened since I’ve been actually active around here But now I guess is the much harder part, my official surgery date will be set at the consultation, but there’s a required $1,000 fee to set the official date for my surgery. The $1,000 covers a portion of the surgery as well, and the base price for the surgery is $8,500. I’ll get the exact price on July 5th, but that’s their base rate. I need to earn or raise at least $1,000 of the total cost before July 5th to secure my surgery date!! I’m going to take commissions when I can, I have 1 almost entirely complete right now and then I can take on more! I’m gonna have a more detailed explanation of everything under the cut so this isnt super super long so pls read under there if you want all the deets Pls consider commissioning me or donating so I can get top surgery!! read more for more info and me being sappy abt my emotions--

I’ve waited so long for this and I’m fricken excited, it’s the last step in transitioning for me! It really means everything for me, I feel like I’ve been waiting forever and I can’t believe it’s finally happening !?!!! I am forever in everyones debt here and everywhere because I never wouldve even been able to start hrt if it wasn’t for the help here. I’m just so. Overwhelmed with emotion and gratitude I cant even tell how many times Ive cried and just felt like... actual gender euphoria since starting t..

So abt the appointment, I’m getting surgery with Dr. Javad Sajan, and I’m getting button hole double incision. Im serious his before and after pictures make me so emotional I am so happy and emotional for those people and I cannot wait to feel that kind of happiness and relief. But a big problem about this for me, is that he is in Seattle, and I live in southern Oregon. I can’t drive, so I have to rely on someone else, or take the train from a nearby city (Eugene). My consultation is over skype (which is amazing and a huge relief), but my pre-op appointment is in person, and of course so is the actual surgery. We’re planning on taking the train from Eugene because it seems to be the most reliable way to get there and back each time. Aside from my surgery, I’ve got to cover the price of the trip there and back (twice, once there and back for pre-op, once there and back post op,) and the price of a place to stay during the pre-op appointment. Right now my goal cost wise, is just the booking and base appointment price ($8,500, that’s including the $1,000 appointment setting deposit, which is just a part of the surgery cost and the base covers everything, surgery, the stay at the hospital, nips, anesthesia, everything). The full price is due at the pre-op appointment, and that’s the final bill. My insurance doesn’t cover anything because it’s out of state and county, and because its informed consent model. (which Im choosing because Id have to battle insurance for 2 years minimum if I was getting the surgery in Oregon, but I am very set on my surgeon after considering everything and calling many offices and looking through many subreddits and talking to ppl who’ve gotten it here and there) A lot of this information is on their site as well. As soon as I have my consultation, I will be right here to update everything and set the exact price, which I’ll also be including the price of transportation and staying there. As for paying, I’ve been applying to so many jobs, and even when I get interviews I never hear back from them. People keep telling me to stop admitting I’m disabled but I just can’t do that. Lying about being disabled doesnt make me abled and they don’t get that. I’m still trying though, and I am not going to stop trying until I get a job. But until then commissions and donations are my only source of income. I’ve been struggling getting help psychologically, because I have schizophrenia, and because I was diagnosed with adhd as a child, but I think I’m actually autistic rather than having adhd, and it’s been really hard trying to get diagnosed because I keep getting pushed off or told I cant have autism because I have paranoid schizophrenia or because its “just adhd”, but the medications are just making everything worse, and Ive tried more than one already. My medications for schizophrenia have started not working right, and when my schizophrenia meds get under control, it makes my adhd (?) significantly worse. Genuinely, I really dont know what’s happening. I really dont know whats going on with me right now and it’s hard and confusing and I keep swinging back and forth and it’s making everything deteriorate so fast I cant keep up with it. It seriously effects my ability to do anything at all, even art, and its been like this for the last 6 months. I am trying though, still trying to work, still trying to get a job, still trying to get a real diagnosis and help and Im not going to stop any of that. But I think getting top surgery as soon as possible is going to help me too, because dysphoria has just gotten so much worse focusing on my chest since t has started helping me pass and look so much more masculine. It’s like all my attention went from everything DIRECTLY to my chest and its almost unbearable. Even now since my sex has been legally changed I keep having the horrible thoughts of ‘why, why I am a man Im not supposed to be this way’ and shit idk. I’m getting too serious right now I have an appointment with the dmv to get a new updated driver’s permit with my name and fixed legal sex, and when I do that I can set up a bank account (I cant yet bcs I dont have a valid id/ id at all because I actually lost the other one and have been carrying around that paper one you’re supposed to destroy that is literally from 2016) and when I do, I’m going to set up a proper gofundme for my surgery and the travel expenses, but for now all I have is my paypal and online banking savings account. I’ll get that up asap once I have my id, though (Ive already been to the bank with my notarized judge passed papers and they wont take those yeah I know it’s stupid its like the same thing) But uhhh yeah! Thank you for reading this far if you did lol and considering helping me bcs my god, it literally means everything to me. pls share hehe

#commission info #donation post #i know it seems like all i do is cry about needing money #but my god. bitches really do be needing money #its me im bitches #top surgery fund #help yer local transmasc flower #pls

86 notes · View notes

sylvie-writes · 4 years ago

Text

A Father’s Love

pairing: steve rogers x reader ft. sarah rogers

requests:Hey, can I ask for a Steve Sarah fic where baby Sarah is injured or unwell and Steve is more distressed than the reader and cries holding Sarah and she assures him that she is fine and brave girl -anon 2. hi i love your writing!! i have a request for a headcanon or oneshot: i watched ww84 (which was not that good of a movie oof) but there was a romantic fireworks scene and it made me think of celebrating 4th of july with steve rogers on his birthday and just like, cuddling up next to him on a picnic blanket while watching him watch the fireworks and oh it just makes me so SOFT- anon

word count: 1,750

author’s note: pardon any mistakes! sorry for combining the requests, hope y'all still like it!

gif below was found on google

Never before in your life had you ever experienced such fear. Although the warm sun streamed down in rays, creating a happy scene, you were somewhere else. A place where nothing else mattered except for your daughter. Nerves, anticipation, and dread flooded your veins. Any parent would feel this way, especially under these circumstances. A majority of the time, you wouldn’t consider yourself a “helicopter parent,” even though Bucky and Sam would say otherwise. Now, was an exception because your four year old daughter was learning to roller skate in the cul-de-sac where her grandparents currently reside. Her little hand was interlaced with her father’s and the 6’2 man crouched down to be a bit shorter. He was anything but an expert in this field and that made you even more nervous as he’d occasionally slip. Before you could say anything to him, he’d just put a hand out, signaling that everything was okay, and you’d be left to bite down on your lip, silently channeling your fear.

From the looks of it, one would think you weren’t trusting of your husband and while that wasn’t the whole truth, you just knew he wasn’t the most...graceful and elegant human on planet earth. Rather he was the type of guy to fall and literally laugh it off. That was fine for him, but if your daughter fell on this rocky pavement, well, you’d both have another coming. Or at least that’s what you had assumed.

Sarah’s giggles echoed and you could hear your parents’ shouts of encouragement from the house. You were standing on the end of the driveway, eyes glued to the giant man and the tiny girl, happily skating around. After a few minutes, Sarah finally found her footing, so to say, and was actually skating without Steve’s support.

Finally, you dropped your shoulders and let out a sigh of relief at the two enjoying themselves. It was all going fine until Sarah was turning, like she had done so many times before, but this time happened to catch a rock under a wheel on her right skate.

In your mind, it all happened in slow motion, making your feet stay grounded, yet your conscience was “running” to her. Steve’s face looked absolutely mortified and he dropped to his knees, ignoring the pain from the harsh contact, he immediately scooped up the girl.

For a moment, her lip quivered and Steve continued to soothingly stroke her hair, gazing into her watering eyes. Just when you thought the dam would break, Sarah swallowed her sobs, shook it all off, and stood from her father’s lap. She even held out a hand to help him up and he looked very shocked. Even more shocked than when you told him you were going into labor, which was quite the experience, one you preferred to not re-live.

Eventually, you joined the two and up close you could see that Steve had a single tear running down his face. You knew his worst fear was failing his daughter, he had told you so many years ago. Sarah noticed Steve’s sorrow and she got down once more to sit back on her heels. With gentle movement, Sarah wrapped her arms around the man’s broad shoulders and pulled him into the most lovable hug you’ve seen in ages.

“It’s okay, Daddy. Please don’t cry! See I’m just as brave as you!”

Your daughter then laid her head on his shoulder, the two of them in their own little world as usual. You hated to break them up, but they were currently sitting in the middle of the road and you’d rather not get hit by a car. Softly, you tapped Steve’s shoulder and he slowly rose up, Sarah in his arms and tired from the scare as well. The three of you made your way back up the driveway and into the house where your mother met you with the same nervous look you had once wore. Once a nurse, always a nurse, for she had a first aid kit in hand. You quickly reassured her and followed Steve back to your rooms.

Summer in New York City wasn’t that much enjoyable, so ever since Sarah had been born, you and Steve come in July to stay at your parents house. Today was Fourth of July and you helped your parents with their annual barbeque. That went well and then the whole roller skating incident happened and now here you were. It was 3 in the afternoon and since it was Steve’s birthday, you had some surprise plans for him later. He was unaware and had assumed you had forgotten his birthday, which you had not.

An hour later, you found Sarah in the pool with your parents while Steve sat on one of the lounge chairs, only khaki swim trunks on. You could tell he’d been out of the pool for a while as his hair was starting to look a bit fluffy. Steve’s eyebrows were furrowed in concentration and in his lap you could see a sketch that he was tediously working on. Your daughter was too busy playing pool volleyball with her grandparents, that the three were yet to notice your presence. Deciding to take matters into your own hands, you strutted over to Steve and sat on the edge of his seat where you gently tapped his leg to gain his attention.

“Whatcha working on, Grant?”

Steve peered up at you, his smile possibly even brighter than the sun that reflected on you both. He silently passed off the sketchbook to you. The sketch depicted the scene happening before your eyes, your parents bonding with Sarah, all of them wearing large grins and laughter. It was the kind of picture that could lift someone's mood in an instant, all because Steve was the best at portraying emotions in his artwork.

“So, birthday boy, I have some plans for you… that is if you are still up to it.” You motioned to his current laid back state and Steve looked down at himself to see what you meant. He was curious as to what you had planned, having told you not to plan anything for his birthday.

“Oh honey, I told you not to do anything.” Steve looked at you disapprovingly, his sunglasses now pulled down so you could feel the full effect of his “glaring.”

“It’s not everyday that a wife gets to celebrate her husband’s...” Pausing, you did some quick mental math (that may have not been accurate) and came to an answer, “102nd birthday!”

At that, Steve lurched forward and pulled you onto his lap, placing a kiss on your temple as his arms tightly wrapped around your waist.

“You spoil me too much, doll.” A simple hum was your only reply and you leaned back into his embrace.

----

About an hour later, both you and Steve got quick showers and tidied up a bit. The only thing Steve had heard about where you were taking him, was that it wasn’t too fancy as you told him to dress casual. As Steve got ready, you asked Sarah if she wanted to come along, but instead she decided to stay back and make some cookies with your mom.

The two of you then met at the front door where you kissed Sarah goodbye and headed off to the car. Just as Steve was about to get in the driver’s seat, you stole the keys from his grasp and gave him a small “tsk tsk” causing the man to laugh. Earlier, while Steve had gotten dressed, you had been able to sneak out and put a prepared picnic basket in the trunk of the car along with a large blanket. For Steve’s birthday, you were taking him to see fireworks at a nearby park. You knew how much of a sucker he was for fireworks and a good, old fashioned, park picnic.

As you pulled into the entrance of the park and globs of people sat out on the field, Steve’s eyes started to sparkle with excitement and you couldn't help but grin at him.

“Babe, is this what I think it is?”

You put the car in park and turned in your seat to fully face Steve, “If you’re thinking fireworks and a picnic, then you’re right. I’m sorry it’s not a lot, but I know how much you-”

Before you could finish your unnecessary apology, Steve sweetly grabbed your face and pulled you in for an enchanting kiss.

“It’s perfect, (y/n).”

Steve’s face softened into a loving look and his azure eyes looked the slightest bit shiny in the moonlight.

You parted away from the man and exited the car, heading to the trunk where Steve met you. He helped carry the picnic basket despite your pleas for him to not do so.

The park wasn't too crowded, but there were just enough people for you and Steve to have to search around for a good ten minutes. Eventually you spotted this place under a tree that wasn’t too surrounded and had a perfect view of where the fireworks would be.

Swiftly, you laid out the plaid picnic blanket and Steve then set down the picnic basket that was filled with the components of your dinner. You began to set out the prepared food, even bringing out a candle, albeit fake, that provided some romantic and not overwhelming lighting.

Since you both had arrived twenty minutes before the show started, it allowed for you and Steve to enjoy the dinner peacefully. You had even packed some desserts but those would be for during the show as a little something to snack on.

Just as the show started, you had finished packing away the last of the Tupperware containers and now settled in between Steve's legs, his chest providing use as a pillow. The man delicately rested his chin on your shoulder and in return, you lovingly rubbed his forearms that laid in your lap.

“Thank you for the best birthday, my love. You’ve given me so much over these past few years and I swear I don’t know what I’d be without you.”

It was a whisper in your ear, but you still heard it over the loud crackling of the fireworks.

With a warm smile and quiet giggle, you brought his hand to your lips and placed a kiss on the back of his hand.

“Only you could pull off such a cheesy line, Rogers.”

#this one is kind of trash im sorry #Steve Rogers #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x y/n #steve rogers one shot #dad steve rogers #dad steve rogers x reader #sarah rogers #steve x sarah #chris evans x reader #chris evans fanfiction

137 notes · View notes

blueskrugs · 4 years ago

Text

Let Me Count the Ways | Robert Thomas

this has been on my list since like July and I could just never get around to it. I finally sat down today and came up with something short and sweet.

for @stl-boys55 for helping me come up with this idea ages ago, and for that one anon who asked for Robby fic recs. there’s some description of an injury, but no Robbys were harmed in the making of this fic.

length: 1.8k words

How soon was too soon to fall in love? How did you even know you were in love? You’d always thought that you were too young to know the answers, that it would take a few more years and a few more breakups, but from the day you met Robert Thomas, you were sure you were going to fall hard and fast. It wouldn’t take much, really, with that damn giggle and his habit of sticking his tongue out whenever he was focused on something (which was often). More than that though, Robby was sweet, and funny, and would blush and roll his eyes when you teased him before chirping you right back.

Yeah, you never stood a chance.

It wasn’t until about six months into your relationship that you realized just how in deep you were.

You weren’t sure you would ever get tired of the energy of the Enterprise Center on a Blues gameday. It was crowded and loud, filled with people wearing jerseys of players old and new. Each game was new and exciting, but familiar just the same. You went to games when you could, but it had taken you a while to get used to sitting with the rest of the Better Halves. You were younger than all of them, still in school while they had kids or were on their way to that, and you had felt like you could never belong. The other girls had been unfailingly nice to you, though, so now you looked forward to seeing everyone at games, holding the little ones or standing with them at the glass during warmups, happily playing babysitter for the night. So that’s where you were on a nondescript Tuesday night, Blake Bozak sitting on your lap as the second period started. You were only half paying attention to the game, to be honest, with the Blues already up by three goals as the minutes ticked by. You’re talking to Cris about your plans for the summer, but you’re watching Robby as he clambers over the boards and onto the ice for a shift. It had become habit to keep an eye on him whenever he’s on the ice, which is why you see everything that happens next.

It feels like it happens in slow motion. Robby chases the puck to the boards, but he trips over a divot in the ice before he gets there and starts falling. A Jets player was already coming up to check Robby into the boards, and he doesn’t have time to stop, crashing into his back. Robby hits the boards with his head first, and then his shoulder, before laying there, crumpled, dazed, not moving.

A hush falls over the arena as a trainer rushes out onto the ice. A scrum has broken out, players yelling and whistles blowing, but you don’t really hear any of it. You’re distantly aware that you’re clutching Cris’s hand, and that you’re hardly breathing, eyes still trained on Robby.

He’s rolled onto his back, talking to the trainer, which is good, you know, but you can’t quite quiet the anxiety that’s tightening around your chest like a vise, a heavy weight that settles on your heart. His stick lays abandoned, forgotten, a couple feet away on the ice.

Minutes pass; you’re not sure how long. Eventually someone helps him to his feet, and he makes his way, slowly, off the ice. He’s favoring his entire right side, and they have to stop more than once, though they hadn’t started very far from the door to the bench. You watch as Robby disappears down the tunnel, are still watching even as the puck drops and play resumes like nothing ever happened. You don’t look away until Blake tugs on your shirt, and you tear your eyes away with a smile, but it’s forced.

The Blues hold on to win, someone even scores another goal, but it’s all a blur to you. Robby had come back to the bench early in the third, had even taken a short shift or two, but he mostly had just sat stiffly at the end of the bench and watched.

You make your way down to the tunnels with everyone else after the final buzzer. There are conversations happening around you, but you’re caught up in your thoughts, still seeing Robby lying motionless on the ice.

You’re startled, then, when Robby appears in front of you, showered, but in sweatpants and a hoodie instead of his gameday suit. You stop yourself from launching yourself at him, but just barely, settling instead for wrapping your arms around his neck. He hugs you back, but you can tell that he’s sore all over by the way his shoulders are tense, how he’s holding himself too tightly.

“Can you drive me home?” he murmurs, holding his keys up.

You take them with a smile before taking Robby’s hand and walking with him to the parking garage. You’re both quiet in the car, radio on but turned down low. Robby isn’t on his phone, just looking out the window, and you can’t stop yourself from casting worried glances his way as you drive. He looks pale, washed out by the highway lights coming through the windshield.

He catches you looking his way at one point, mumbles out a, “Stop it,” before turning and looking firmly out his window.

You keep your eyes on the road until you pull into the parking garage. It’s still silent between you as you make your way upstairs and to Robby’s apartment. You’re a step behind him as you step inside and close the door behind you. You watch as he drops his keys in the bowl by the door, and you notice that he’s still moving stiffly.

“How’re you feeling, babe?” you blurt out, taking a step closer and resting your hand on the shoulder that didn’t slam into the boards. “Can I do anything, get you anything?”

“I’m fine,” Robby says shortly, shrugging off your hand and walking towards the bedroom. You’re still standing in the same spot when he comes back, and some of your hurt and confusion must show on your face, because Robby lets out a frustrated sigh. “Look, nothing’s broken, no concussion, I’m just tired and sore. So can you stop looking at me like that?” he snaps.

“I was really worried,” you say softly. “Thought about running down onto the ice myself,” you admit, but Robby doesn’t laugh.

“What good would that have done?”

You sigh, running your hands through your hair. Briefly, you’re glad Robby finally moved out of the Tkachuks’ basement, that no one else is around to listen to this stupid fight.

“I don’t know, Rob! I was scared. You went down hard, and you weren’t moving, and I just-”

“I get hit all the time,” Robby interrupts.

“This was different, and you know it.”

“Is it, though? It would’ve been a perfectly fine hit if I hadn’t been falling, and I’m fine.” Robby pauses. “I don’t get why you care so much about this, why can’t you just leave me alone?”

“Because I love you, dammit, Robby!” you burst out.

Robby freezes, his mouth half open. It’s dark in the apartment, just a single lamp and the light from the bedroom spilling down the hallway, and you’re still standing near the door, Robby sitting on the couch in the living room.

It’s the first time either of you have said those words. You hadn’t realized they were true, either, until they were out of your mouth and hanging in the space between you. It might not have been the best time to say it for the first time, but that didn’t mean you regretted it. Robby still hasn’t said anything, though, hasn’t even moved, and you start to think you’ve made a mistake.

Six months isn’t a long time, not really. You’re both still young, and maybe Robby doesn’t feel the same way. You take a step back, turn towards the door, trying to decide if it would be easier to call an Uber or to call Schwartzy to come get you, but your movement snaps Robby out of whatever daze he was in. He jumps to his feet, stumbling across the apartment towards you. Before you know it, your back is pressed to the wall next to the door, Robby’s hands resting on your hips. He winces, though, and you run your hand up his bruised side over his T-shirt.

“Rob,” you breathe.

“Say it again,” he says, but he brushes a kiss across your lips before you can reply.

“I love you, Robert Thomas,” you say against his mouth before he’s kissing you for real, deep and sweet and slow.

He pulls back after a moment, just enough to bite his lip and look you in the eyes. You grin and tangle your fingers in the hair at the nape of his neck.

“I love you, too,” he whispers, resting his forehead against yours.

“You scared me,” you whisper back, and you’re talking about more than watching him get injured.

“I’m sorry,” Robby says back, and he’s talking about more than just the fight. One of his hands slips from your hip and into yours. “Come cuddle?” he asks, and you’re treated to that gap-toothed smile you love so much.

Later, you’re curled up against Robby’s non-injured side while some movie is playing on the TV. Neither of you are really watching, both half-asleep and cozy. Robby has been absently playing with your fingers for the last fifteen minutes, and you’re not sure he’s even aware he’s doing it.

“Thanks for worrying about me,” he mumbles, pressing a kiss to the top of your head.

You tilt your head to grin at him. “What was that, couldn’t hear ya, babe.”

Robby sticks his tongue out at you, but he leans down to kiss you again. “I love you,” is what he says.

“I love you, too, you dork.” You smirk. “I was thinking about calling Jaden to come rescue me for a moment there.”

Robby groans. “Schwartzy would literally have killed me.”

“Can’t have that, now can we?” you laugh, and Robby tugs you closer, trying to give you a noogie, but your elbow lands in his ribs, and he lets go of you with a gasp. You just laugh harder as he glares at you and rubs his side.

“I take it back,” he says, but he betrays himself with a giggle.

You fall asleep like that, sprawled out and tangled together, as the credits roll, and there’s a smile on your face. Robby will probably be even more sore in the morning from spending the night on the couch, but you think it’ll have been worth it.

#cait writes things #robert thomas #st louis blues #st louis blues fic #robert thomas fic #robert thomas imagine #nhl fic #nhl imagine #hockey fic #hockey fanfiction #i literally still don't know how to tag stories y'all

146 notes · View notes

blesspastacraig · 4 years ago

Text

A Year in Review

I wanted to creat a list of sorts of everything I wrote in 2020, since I managed to do a lot.

Here’s my one shots:

Not Alone - Published 08 Jan 2020

"I keep telling you, I don't want to go" Craig complains as he burps one of his two newborn twin daughters. His mom, thankfully is burping the other. Craig knows he should be nicer to her but two newborns has him at the end of his tether.

"I know but I'm going to keep pushing you until you do" she says, swaying and patting Daisy's back.

or Craig and Tweek bond at a young parents group because they're the only two people with twins.

New Beginnings - Published 19 Feb 2020

Tweek doesn’t want to push her, so they’re both a little cautious of one another. Tweek doesn’t want to barge in and fill a role she hasn’t given him yet. She’s never had a second parental figure before, and Tweek doesn’t want to force himself into that slot. He barely feels worthy of being the father to his biological child, let alone a stepdad figure to this poor little girl who’s life he’s just invaded.

Or Tweek takes Craig's daughter to a daddy daughter dance because Craig is unable.

Love Chooses You - Published 29 March 2020

He's heard the phrase that you can't choose who you love before, and really, right now he knows it's true. Damien never would have chosen to love Pip of all people.

Rebuild - Published 11 May 2020

“I’m flying Craig!” Tweek cries from the top of the concrete slab. Craig doesn’t answer, only sighs. He sinks down knowing he’s gonna let it happen. He doesn’t want to let it happen but the alcohol has made him slow. Kinda in the same way the drugs have made Tweek fast. They’re out of sync with no way of catching up until sobriety. So Craig just watches, letting it happen. Like he’s watching his own body do nothing. The inner voice tells him to move, to stop it but the body can’t unstick itself from the ground.

Coming Out - Published 20 May 2020

If Tweek is being honest his friends were Craig’s friends, originally. Now they’re his friends too but before Tweek had been a bit of a loner. Not by choice, but for whatever reason kids at school either didn’t like him or just didn’t know he existed. He spent most of his time alone, reading books, studying, playing music or anything one can do alone to ease boredom. For the longest time he’d been the freak and now he actually had friends, like, for real.

Red Racer and Ice Cream - Published 12 June 2020

He could leave, but he knows Tweek will start worrying about him. Tweek is having a good night, he seems pleasantly drunk and is having a great time with Jimmy and Token. Craig doesn't want to wreck what is shaping up to ve a good night for Tweek. It's taken a while to get Tweek to really feel comfortable in social situations like these. He wants Tweek to have the best night he can.

Much Ado About Theatre - Published 15 June 2020

"It's in english stupid, just old english" Tweek reminds Craig.

"Whatever I don't get it. It's like reading gibberish" Craig says dismissively, clearly frustrated.

"Why are you -nghh- taking this class then?" Tweek asks, purely curious. It's not just Shakespeare Craig seems disinterested in. He seems uncomfortable onstage as a whole.

"Because you're taking it" Craig admits sheepishly, a blush appearing on his cheeks.

Sure - Published 19 June 2020

Craig gets his first piercing and Tweek accompanies for moral support. They talk about facing fears and the future.

or Tweek is covered with piercings and tattoos and Craig is a body mod virgin.

Firsts - Published 02 July 2020

Craig likes having a Birthday in the winter. It's kind of a good excuse for only inviting like, four people to his gatherings on the excuse they can't go outside. Craig was never big on the schoolyard politics, even when he was small. The idea that he had to have the biggest party, or the most extravagant and have to decide who or whom not to invite stressed him out. He likes having the excuse that he only had a small house, and that his Birthday was in winter in Colorado, so that he can only invite his best friends and be done with it.

or Craig and Tweek's first birthdays together as boyfriends.

Dopamine, Norepinephrine, Serotonin, Oxytocin and Vasopressin - Published July 11 2020

Tweek sighs boredly as he stirs the potion in his cauldron. It's not that he doesn't like earning a living making potions for people and casting spells but it's so much of the same thing. It's always love potions, that's all he makes these days.

Distracted - Published 26 July 2020

Tweek and Craig needed this break so badly. He feels kind of bad for Craig's mom, who is probably going to have a sleepless night babysitting their son. But holy shit, they needed this.

Stir Crazy - Published 14 August 2020

Craig Tucker: Tucker baby coming 2020! We could not be more excited to announce that Tweek and I are having a baby! There's no one else I'd rather go on this crazy journey with. - with Tweek Tucker.

or Craig is pregnant in quarantine.

Source Decay - Published 16 August 2020

Craig still hasn't taken off his wedding ring. He knows he should, but he just hasn't found it in him yet. He knows Tweek hasn't either, he's seen it in pictures even though now they've been separated longer than they were together.

Baby’s First Skateboard - Published 10 September 2020

Craig and Tweek never really grew out of skateboarding. They do it less often than they did before becoming parents, but they still do their best to make time.

You’re the Boss at Home - Published 18 September 2020

So he has mixed feelings about his last day. He knows he'll miss working, he's always been a working person and he knows he won't like sitting at home waiting to go into labor. But also, he doesn't have to deal with everyone fussing over him being pregnant anymore.

Little Star - Published 03 October 2020

This can't be happening to him, he can't have a baby! What would he do with a baby? He doesn't know. He doesn't even know what he's going to do when he goes into labour. He knows, inevitably he will. That he will go into labour, the baby has to come out some way and it's gonna hurt. He knows all this, but he can't bring himself to ask for help. He knows he's in trouble but he doesn't know how to ask for help.

Baby Love - Published 02 November 2020

Craig tries to swallow down the pain. He can't yell or cry out. Everyone will know then. He has to stay quiet or else everyone will know. He bites down on his lip hard and crouches on the floor near his bed. He has to just breathe, if he breathes through it he can make it. He knows he can.

This Time Around - Published 12 November 2020

Tweek knew he was pregnant with his second child straight away. It was a 180 from his first pregnancy, where he took months to figure it out. When he was pregnant with his first child, his son Teddy, he didn't really have much in the way of symptoms besides being hungry all the time. That was pretty easy to dismiss and write off. They weren't trying for a baby, so Tweek had no reason to assume he was pregnant. He only worked it out because he began showing.

Whatever We Are - Published 22 December 2020

It's hard because Stan isn't quite sure what he is to Kyle. Is it just sex? Is it more? Does Kyle maybe wanna make it more official soon? Stan doesn't know. He knows he loves Kyle and he'd pretty much do whatever Kyle wants. But for now, he's just enjoying the intimacy.

Temptation - Published 24 December 2020

Being summoned is kinda annoying. It's kind of like being asleep, super deeply and then pulled into the bright bustling world with no warning. It's no wonder most demons are angry and violent.

Tweek is an imp, so he's more on the mischievous, poltergeist side of the spectrum. He still scares the shit out of most people who summon him. Usually kids with ouija boards who don't know what they're doing. It's whatever, Tweek usually chases them for a bit, makes them scream and that's enough mischief for one day. Tweek can choose to appear by choice, and leave when he wants to but he rarely does. Humans are mostly annoying, so he stays in his own little world until some idiot summons him.

Traditions - Published 25 December 2020

"I hate Christmas" Craig sighs, looking around at all the lights and decorations. He glares at all the people bustling around. Don't they have homes to go to? He rests a hand on his swollen stomach, he certainly wishes he was home.

Here’s My Multichapters, completed and ongoing:

The Sound of Silence - Completed 25 January 2020

15 Chapters

Craig manages to find himself alone, jobless and a new parent. He struggles to put the pieces of his life back together and build something new for both himself and his daughter.

Don’t Break Me - Completed 26 March 2020

2 Chapters

"What are you -ngrhh- accusing me of?" Tweek growls.

"Literally nothing Tweek, I'm accusing you of your health improving? Isn't that good?" Craig huffs in annoyance. He's sick of his intentions being misinterpreted.

Insight - Completed 10 April 2020

2 Chapters

Craig listens to the incessant ticking of the clock on his wall. He can’t actually see it, it’s night and all the lights are off. But he can hear it, a constant reminder of the passing of time. He knows he should sleep, he really wishes he could but it’s just too hard. Knowing Tweek isn’t here but not knowing where Tweek is. He can’t help but worry even though he has so much more to worry about. His mom would tell him off, tell him he needs to rest but this thing with Tweek has him so messed up.

When We’re Older - Completed 04 July 2020

10 Chapters

When they're older they'll start again. They'll get married, find a house, do it all right. Have children when the time is right and build the loving, nurturing home they both have always wanted.

Stowaway - Completed 14 July 2020

3 Chapters

He's slowly beginning to accept it himself, yes, he's pregnant. He knows it but he's not quite ready to face the consequences yet. He didn't intend to get pregnant, he just got too drunk at a party and had sex with a childhood friend. Consensual but unprotected. He feels stupid now.

So he hides them, the baby, like a little stowaway.

Algorithm - Completed 12 August 2020

5 Chapters

Craig shakes his head. He looks at the homemade bracelet which spells Craig on Tweeks wrist. His heart breaks thinking about how Tweek will cut it off once he knows the truth.

Two for the Price of One - Completed 26 August 2020

4 Chapters

Craig has never been one to succumb to baby fever. He knows a lot of people in his profession do. Both he and his husband, Tweek, professional lives revolve around babies. Newborns too, and while Craig acknowledges that babies may be cute, other people's kids have never really triggered some urge to have his own.

Hungry - Completed 11 September 2020

2 Chapters

Tweek has heard about cryptic pregnancies before. He's seen I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant before, people saying they didn't have any nausea, felt normal, didn't put on weight. This isn't quite that, Tweek gained a small amount of weight. He felt fatigued, but he just put that down to stress. He didn't feel nauseous unless he had a headache, so it was really easy to blame that on the headache. The real only symptom he's had is the hunger. He doesn't think it's far fetched that he didn't realise, surely?

or Tweek doesn't realise he's pregnant because his only real symptom is being hungry all the time :)

Creek Week 2020 - Completed 02 November 2020

7 Chapters

My contribution for this years Creek Week 2020

All seven of these are short snippets of either fics I intend to write, or AU's I have left unfinished. But I thought it might be fun to share small excerpts.

Complicated - Ongoing, Last updated 08 January 2021

18 Chapters Published, 20 Chapters all together.

Craig kind of has an image. It's not that he's pretending to be someone else, but he likes to be perceived as aloof, cold and quiet. He's nice to people who truly know him, but he doesn't like to be perceived as soft from the outside. People already think he's kind of weird, and putting up those walls really helps him to keep unwanted people out. His boyfriend sees his sensitive side, his friends do and his family do. The rest of the world gets a cold shoulder, at least until he gets to know someone and decides to let them in.

Craig and Tweek figure out an unplanned pregnancy, Craig learns families come in all shapes and sizes. Especially LGBTQ ones.

AO3 Statistics:

Word Count: 261512

Works Published: 31

Top Five Fics by Hits:

1. Complicated

2. When We’re Older

3. The Sound of Silence

4. Stowaway

5. Hungry

All in all, not a bad output. Thanks to everyone who took the time to read, leave kudos and comment. ❤️

#2020 masterpost #2020 roundup #2020 year in review #my writing master post #my fic #my writing #craig tucker #tweek tweak #craig tucker/tweek tweak #sp creek #creek sp #creek #south park #south park fanfiction

34 notes · View notes

sunsetcurbed · 4 years ago

Text

you say we’re just friends

Pairing: Julie/Luke Words: 1,695 Rating: G Warnings: none read on AO3

Summary: "Alright, alright, this is actually taking me towards something here," James says, and the entire band looks at him. "The big question," he says, leaning forward in his seat, looking between all of the band members. "The real hunk of a question."

"Alright," Luke nods along, drumming his hands in his lap.

"Are Julie and Luke dating?"

[based off this Shawn Mendes/Camila Cabello interview]

(*)

The screen fades in from black to show James sitting on the left side of the screen and the band, Julie and the Phantoms, sitting to his right.

"You guys are one of the hottest bands as of right now—having gone multiplatinum, earning three Grammy nominations, heading on a sold out world tour, a concert film to follow—you can't get much hotter than that." James says, shaking his head as the crowd cheers and the band on the couch looks to be literally vibrating with excitement next to him. "Guys, that's incredible."

"Isn't it?" the one in plaid says—Luke Patterson. He's sat in between Julie Molina and Reggie Peters, and on the end next to Reggie is Alex Mercer. All four of them are on the edges of their seats, leaning their elbows on their knees. "Our second album and we've already reached this level of success its…" he looks at the others. "I don't think we ever could have dreamed it up."

"Even if we could have it wouldn't have been this fast," Alex says. "We were literally playing in a garage two years ago."

"Yeah, yeah," Reggie jumps in. "Like, okay, two albums, great, we have so much more music, we've been writing for years, we have enough music for five or six albums. Going on tour, that was always the plan. The tour selling out? That was just—that was just incredible."

"And getting our nominations and going multiplatinum?" Julie shakes her head. "Unbelievable. It's unreal."

"No, no," James says, "it's very real. That's amazing though! Two years ago you were in a garage?"

"Yup," Luke nods. He tosses an arm around Julie and pulls her in. "We practically lived in Jules's garage from the time we were freshman in high school until we graduated and got paid. Because they signed us during our senior year, so we moved out on our own as soon as we could."

"Well, most of us," Reggie says.

"Julie still lives with her family," Alex says. "But us guys live together."

"That's sweet that you still live with your family," James says, smiling at Julie. "Or could you just not stand living with these three?"

"A little bit of both?" she laughs. "I'm really close with my family and I know with touring I won't see them often, so I want to spend time with them when I can. But also I'm at the guys' place nearly every day and I could never imagine living there. I clean up after them enough without living there."

"Hey, we do pretty good!" Luke frowns.

"I found a pizza box under your bed last month, Luke," Julie says, gagging. "There were still two pieces of pizza in it."

Luke furrows his eyebrows together. "Yeah, that was pretty nasty."

"Alright, alright, this is actually taking me towards something here," James says, and the entire band looks at him. "The big question," he says, leaning forward in his seat, looking between all of the band members. "The real hunk of a question."

"Alright," Luke nods along, drumming his hands in his lap.

"Are Julie and Luke dating?"

Julie and Luke throw their heads back and groan at the same time Reggie barks out a laugh and Alex bounces in his seat, pointing at James. "Yes!" he screams, drawing his hand back and thrusting it forward as he repeatedly points at the interviewer. "Asking the real questions, thank you."

"Oh, shut up," Luke says, waving Alex off.

"No," Alex says. "Well, actually, okay, because I'd love to hear the answer to this."

Luke rolls his eyes and looks back at James. "No, we're not."

James raises his eyebrows. He flicks his eyes between Luke's face and his arm that's resting on the couch behind Julie. "Really? Because you two look quite cozy—"

"Really," Julie says.

"Yeah," James says. "You look like a proper couple."

"Proper couple'a best friends," Luke grins, hooking his arm around Julie's neck and dragging her in closer to him.

"No," James says, monotone. "Like a couple who is dating. Alright, who is Perfect—"

"We're really not dating—"

"Who is Perfect Harmony abo—"

"I don't know what we can say, we're just not dating—"

"Who did you write Perfect Har—"

"We've never even considered dating, he's my best friend—"

"Perfect Harmony, who is it ab—"

"She's like the mom friend of the group, she keeps me in line—"

"Who is Perfect Harmony—"

"Mom friend? I'm the mom friend? I'm the—yeah, okay, yeah I'm the mom friend."

"Who's Perfect Harmony about?" James demands, looking between the two of them, now that there's finally a beat of silence. Alex sits off to the side with a grin that looks like it must ache, and Reggie looks absolutely bewildered at the display of voices that had just gone on. "You're the only two on the writing credit for that song—"

"Despite popular belief, it is possible to write a song without a specific source of inspiration," Luke says, leaning towards James like he's sharing a secret, but in doing so he leans in Julie's space, making James look even less convinced.

"Oh please," James laughs. "I bet you two wrote it about one another without even knowing it."

"Oh, did we?" Luke asks at the same time Alex laughs, "I am loving this."

"I think Luke wrote it about me," Reggie says, cupping his face in his hands like an angel.

Alex nudges Reggie with his elbow. "Dude, don't help them out of this."

"No, no, no, Reggie, help us out of this," Julie pleads.

Reggie looks between Alex and Julie with wide eyes. "I-I-I don't know what to do, I'm equally scared of both of you."

"Now, wait a minute," James jumps back in. "Julie, why do you need help out of this?"

"Because someone doesn't believe me and Luke," she says with a roll of her eyes.

"You're going to have to be more specific because I think the majority of your fans don't believe Luke and you," James presses. "I mean, you have heard of Juke, right?"

"Yeah," Luke nods. "And I've also heard of Lalex but Willie would straight up flatten me with his skateboard if I tried making a move on his boyfriend."

"I don't know, man," Reggie says clapping a hand on Luke's shoulder. "Given how Willie and Alex met, flattening you with his skateboard could be seen as Willie making a move."

"We're getting off track," Alex jumps in, leaning around Reggie to look at his other two band mates. "Willex is going strong, now I want to hear about Juke."

"Alex!" Julie cries.

Alex pulls a face, flattening his lips together and pulling them back in a poorly disguised smirk. "You two always say we need to give the people what they want—"

"Musically!" Luke yells, reaching over Reggie to shove at Alex. Reggie leans back into the couch, eyes wide and mouth turned into a deep frown.

"You two are awfully sensitive about this, aren't you?" James laughs from his chair. Julie buries her face in her hands and Luke sits back in his seat and shifts so his entire right side is pressed against hers. He presses his knee against hers, and she pushes hers back into his. "You're also awfully comfortable for a non-couple."

"To be fair Luke is one of the most tactile people you'll meet," Reggie says.

"I do have to—reluctantly—agree with that," Alex sighs. "We once found him cuddling with our lights designer while we were waiting to go on stage."

"But it's like everyone else is a substitute for Julie," Reggie adds. "She's his first choice."

"Dude! I thought you were on our side," Julie pouts.

"I'm on the side of truth and chaos. And truth that causes chaos."

"Alright, let's talk about this," James says, scooting forward so he's sat at the edge of his chair. "I think—"

"Oh god," Julie groans, falling forward so she's folded in half, her hair curtaining around her head and hiding her from everyone. Luke drops his hand from the back of the couch to rub her back soothingly. Julie mumbles something that no one hears, and Luke leans forward, asking her to repeat it. "I said, don't touch me, James is only going to use that against us."

Luke laughs. "I'd rather have a rumor that we're dating than not comfort my best friend."

"Alright, now we've really got to talk about this." James leans down so he's closer to Julie. "I think that the two of you," he says motioning between Luke and Julie, "love each other, but that you're scared of how it might affect the band."

"I think that Julie and I are just friends—"

"I don't believe you're just friends—"

"I don't—I don't care," Luke laughs. "I don't know what to tell you, man."

"The truth!"

"I've been trying!" Luke yells at the same time Julie shoots up and yells "we've been trying!"

"Alex? Reggie?"

"They tell us the same thing," Alex sighs. "We find it equally as hard to believe but in all the years we've known each other we've never lied to one another, at least not knowingly," he shares a look with Reggie who smirks knowingly at Alex, "so. We can't help you here, James."

James drops his head to hang between his shoulders. "So disappointing. Can you hear the hearts breaking?" he asks Julie and Luke.

"It's deafening," Julie deadpans.

"I can't hear myself think over how loud it is," Luke adds in the same tone.

"You could end it all—"

Julie turns to the camera. "And that's all the time we have today, folks! Thanks for watch—"

"All right, all right!" James huffs, waving his hand in front of Julie. "Don't—don't send them away! You've still got a performance!" He looks at the camera. "Don't listen to the lying liar, stay tuned because we've got a performance of Finally Free coming up after this!" He looks back at Julie and Luke and as the camera and audio fade out, asks, "okay, now that the cameras are off, give it to me seriously…"

#juke #juke fic #juke fanfic #jatp fic #jatp fanfic #my writing

14 notes · View notes

halethestilinskis · 3 years ago

Text

Life is not great rn

Just another text note about how my life has imploded over the past 2 weeks. Read if you would like!

Not sure if I put it in past notes, but I work at an optometrist office, with an optical shoppe attached to it, and we actually make cut and make the glasses in house at the Foxboro location, where I primarily am. I used to be a tech, where I would get all your readings before you went in to see the doctor, until we hired some more people and I ended up getting "promoted" to front desk, where I was for about 6 weeks. The new techs, that everyone loves and does a great job, I trained by the way. I got a raise about 3 months ago, I was told by every doctor that I was improving, and look more comfortable and confident in the office. Which I did. Then it all blew up in my face.

The girl training me was named Kelly, and she should never train anyone ever. The way she answers my questions, makes it sound like the dumbest question in the world, made me feel like an absolute fucking idiot every time I was at work. She would point out every LITTLE mistake I would make. For instance, they had a portion or their chart that asked if they had any other eye problems, like amblyopia (lazy eye) or if they had LASIK or something like that, and in a lot of the patients charts, it had "other" in there, when it should be "negative" because there's nothing in there. I get it, and most of the time I fixed it, but if I didn't she would point it out and get real pissy about it. Then I would go through the chart to make sure it was done before the doctor took it, and she made the same fucking mistake, but I couldn't say anything about it. ALSO, they would put their hobbies in there, and even if the hobbies were the same, but the wording was different, she would yell at me to change it, which I thought was a waste of time.. Ya know… because it is, and again, she would make the same mistakes. She was the one reporting to my boss how I was doing, and no one else was, so every little thing I did, she would make it out to be the end of the world. For instance, I overcharged someone for their contact lens evaluation, the father, who always buys contacts through us, was a doctor and Kelly flipped out, telling me I was going to call him and tell him I messed up and see if wanted a refund, which in return cost our office money. When I could've put it as a credit, and when he came to buy contacts through us, we would take it off that order. She goes, "they're doctors" and I was like okay?? Tell me which doctor knows anything about insurance. Guess what, he wanted a refund, and it cost our office money (:

Anyway, anytime I went to work I was stressed out, walking into that building made my blood pressure rise, and any time she wasn't there, it was a great day. So on Wednesday, July 27th, I was told by the doctor that she was moving me to the Milford office, which I hate, but it's away from Kelly so I was all for it, and ready to show that I didn't need her to do my job well. Dr. M, told me she wanted to move me up there so I can take some pressure from the new girl and she can train a little bit more, and she was moving Sam down to Foxboro, because the new girl in Milford sucks and so does her attitude. I noticed I was opening, and told her I didn't have a key to the office, she happily gave me one and I was ready for the week to end.

The next day, I was up front by myself training a new girl that is usually in pretest, but she needs to learn how to work the front as well. Everything was fine, it got a little weird and busy in the middle, but I worked through it, and everything was fine. Around 3, the contacts I had in were REALLY dry and basically about to come out of my eye just by blinking. I decided to take them out and get the glasses I kept in my car for this exact reason. These were my shitty glasses I got from Zenni when I didn't work there, so I didn't ruin my expensive lenses I got from them, again not while working there. They don't have a visible logo, and a patient never asked me about them. The only person to ask me about them, were the guys in the lab that cut the lenses for glasses, because they obviously weren't my normal pair. I told them they were shitty glasses from Zenni, and no patients were in the back while I said that. I wore them at the front for about 2 hours, again, only glasses I had on me, and Dr. D, never said anything to me about them, nor was I planning on wearing them there ever again. Friday, I had the day off, and rested and recharged for my Saturday shift on the 31st. I was excited for one, because Kelly wasn't on with me, the next day was Eric and I's 5th wedding anniversary and we had plans to stay in Boston and have a really expensive and delicious dinner, so I was ready to get the day over with and celebrate with my man. At the end of the day, I was looking through money, and remember that guy I overcharged earlier, well, the optician overcharged him again for his sons evaluation, and guess what, no one yelled at her. Anyway, she fucked up money and me and someone else were trying to figure it out, when Dr. D called me back. Now I messed up in the middle of the day, just a very small mess up and I was prepared for hi, to basically tell me to get my shit together and do better, and I would, especially if I wasn't going to be in this office anymore. Do you know how difficult and stressful it is to do your job effectively, with no mistakes, while someone is literally breathing down your neck? Anyway, he told me that they hired a lot of new people and because of that, my position became really competitive, and even though I was improving and I always take what the doctors say to heart and fix my problems, I was just not where they needed me to be, and that day was my last day.

I was COMPLETELY blindsided, like you literally gave me a key and said I was doing great 4 DAYS AGO, what changed from then to now. So, I was like, "okay" backed my shit, called Eric, crying, telling him what happened, asked the optician to move her car so I could leave and cried literally all day, not understanding why this happened.

So now I'm on unemployment, looking for another job trying to find one that makes good money or at least somewhere in the range of what I was making and trust me, it's extremely difficult.

Eric and I decided maybe we shouldn't stay in Boston because now were not going to make the 1K we planned on spending, back like we thought. My mom was nice enough to get us a hotel, and my family was having a party on that day, so we decided to stop by there and say hi, have some food, and then head to Boston and get some dinner. It was delicious and less than half of what we would have spent, although we plan on going there when I get another job. We went back to the hotel and I took a shower and as I was getting out I heard him on the phone with someone and it ended with "sir". I got out and asked him what was going on, and he said he just got a forced shift for in the morning 8-4. He's a cop, and he can't say no to those. We decided to pack it up and go home so he could get some sleep, I wasn't leaving Boston at 6 AM, but it really screwed our plans. I went to my moms the next day and gave her half the money back, because we couldn't use the room. He went to work, then it was my moms birthday. So I got her flowers and a cake and went over to give it to her. I had plans to go to Brockton to get Eric and I dinner at Sarku, since that was our original plan on the way back from Boston, and we had a nice dinner. I was sent a snapchat from my brothers girlfriend and they were singing happy birthday to my mom with a cake that no one ever told me about. So I got dressed and went to my moms, she lives, literally right around the corner.

On Tuesday, I had a normal day, definitely still dwelling about getting fired, but getting over it, regardless of the reason. Sam texts me during the day, and Dr. D, the one who fired me, is telling another employee that I was fired because I was promoting Zenni, which made me LIVID. I never once promoted them, and I actually always bash them because their glasses SUCK and the only reason I had them is because I wanted a blue light filter for gaming and I didn't want them on my everyday, or pay $300 of them at my office. We tell every patient they suck, and they should get nice glasses for everyday, especially people with a high RX, high cyl, or progressives. So now I'm thinking he got that impression from me wearing my Zenni glasses for 2 hours in the office, again with no visible logo, and I'm still livid, because if he did, he should've said something to me about it, instead of firing me. Now I'm mad and want to get to the bottom of this. I email Dr. M, to hear her side and she stuck with what was originally said, and said at the end that I was laid off, not fired, and I could collect unemployment. I made a Tiktok making fun of what she said with the Stewie voice over of "Oh hold on Louis just texted you, do you want meatballs or burgers for dinner… I'll text back for you, same thing bitch, just different shapes" with the caption of "When your boss says you weren't fired, you were laid off". Which by the way, I do know the difference, but either way, I no longer had a job. AND GUESS WHO FOUND IT, you guess it, my fucking former boss, and she emailed me about, super. She didn't take offense, she just explained the difference to me, but either way, still embarrassing. My dad also texted me about it, which I did not answer, because he didn't hasn’t apologized to me.

I filed for unemployment, and it has yet to be approved 2 weeks later. I told Eric not to worry about household chores because I don't have a job and I can handle it while he works. My mom has been BEGGING me to come down to the Cape with my family, I said won't because, A.) there's no where for me to sleep. B.) I don't have a job, therefore can't spent a ton of money, C.) my mom likes to push every button of mine when she's drunk and then wonder why I'm being a bitch, and D.) there's nothing up there that I haven't done already. My whole family went though, and now that my brother is up there, my house is like straight up haunted. I woke up to the sound of something hitting my bed twice at 4:23 AM, and it definitely was not in my dream, it didn't match up to my dream. Then yesterday, I was sitting in the living room and I heard the fire alarm in the basement go off, and as soon as I opened the basement door, it just stopped. Nothing was wrong down there in the first place, and I constantly hear creaks upstairs like someone is walking when they only have their 5 pound cat up there. It's been 2 weeks since I applied for unemployment and I still haven't gotten paid, so I called yesterday and they said that my employer had to finish paperwork, so I emailed her and let her know. She said there's nothing on her end to do, so I called again today. They said that there is an overdue form and she needs to call this number. Told her, and she called and they said there's nothing for her to fill out and my name isn't even popping up under her employer unemployment, so something went wrong down the line, that we're both not sure of.

And the cherry on top…. Eric made an arrest yesterday, and everything was fine and dandy until his LT called this morning, and he had to go into the station. He was told it was a "bad arrest", and I want to clarify, that he arrested a dude for assault and battery that violated a restraining order, BUT, it wasn't in our city, where he works to it was a bad arrest, ONLY because of that. So, now he had to write a letter to the chief and to the union lawyer, along with the other officer at the scene and the LT that approved his report, and we're a little unsure of what's going to happen next and we've both been stressed all day about it. He's doing better now and hanging out, but I can't destress ever.

So these last two weeks have been absolutely horrible and I want to just have ONE GOOD DAY in my time off from not having a job!!

#fml #bad weeks #laid off #fired #investigation #police

2 notes · View notes

lgbtyrus · 4 years ago

Text

TJ’s Playlist (Final Ep Anniversary Bonus)

So it's been a year since I cried to the finale because tyrus was canon, and I wanted to travel back in time to some of the happiest memories I had because of this show. I had a thing in Macaroni's POV, but it was a little lame and didn't want to finish it so I went this route instead. It's also always bothered me that this story ended on 19 chapters, and I thought this was the perfect chance to even it out with a perfect 20. If you're reading this, I love you very much and thank you for coming back (or getting here for the first time). Goodbye to TJ's Playlist for real now <3

Ao3 Link | Wattpad Link

TJ ran down the hall, pushing by students who couldn’t get out of his way fast enough. It was the last day of middle school, and everyone was lingering behind to say goodbye to their friends who might go to a different high school. TJ had been doing the same before remembering he had promised Cyrus he would meet him up front.

Cyrus was standing with Buffy and Marty, laughing at something one of them said when TJ caught up. “Hi,” TJ told him, bending over to catch his breath. “Sorry I’m late. I forgot how fast time can go.”

“It’s fine.” Cyrus smiled. “I wasn’t going to leave without you.” Cyrus reached over to hold TJ’s hand, making him smile.

Buffy said to Cyrus with a grin, “So yard sale?” Cyrus’s neighborhood had a large yard sale once a year, and they chose the last day of school to do it. Cyrus’ parents invited all of them to take their things to sell.

“Yes! Come by with anything you want to get rid of,” Cyrus replied. “I’m so excited. It feels like a cleanse and the first step into high school.”

“Can’t wait,” Buffy said. “I’m going to stop by home first for my stuff, pick up Andi, and meet you guys there.”

“Sounds like a plan,” Cyrus said and gave her a thumbs up. They said bye to Marty and Buffy who walked off holding hands, leaving TJ with his boyfriend. Cyrus turned to look at him and asked, “So. Did you think about it?”

TJ bit at the inside of his cheek for a moment. “I did.”

“And?”

“I think I’m going to sell them.”

Cyrus jumped up. “Yes? Really?”

“Just the repeats!” TJ smiled, taking a step back to avoid getting stepped on.

“Yes, that’s amazing. That’s perfect. The people in the neighborhood are going to love you,” Cyrus said. “We’ll look up the value of every single one before we set them out.”

“Already did that. That’s actually the reason why I decided to sell them.”

“Are they worth a lot?”

“Not as much as the cameras would be, but it’s a decent amount of money to pay for basketball camp.” TJ and Cyrus started walking away from their now former middle school, not looking back.

“How long would you be gone for?” Cyrus asked him.

“Three weeks. We can handle that, right?” TJ asked him, squeezing his hand. The coach at Grant High School recommended he go to basketball camp to secure a spot on the varsity team the next year, but it was a little pricey even with both of his parents working at the time.

“Of course.” Cyrus squeezed his hands back, smiling at him. “Let’s go get your things.” After going through his GG’s stuff for the first time, TJ realized there was a lot of valuable items that included comic books and vinyls. He was letting go of all the comic books because he wasn’t interested in that, but he didn’t have the desire to let go of any music. There was more vinyl’s in the attic than he realized and even though he didn’t have a player, he wanted them for the day he did have one.

Cyrus was talking to TJ about his last day of dance and how he wasn’t looking forward to regular PE at all as they headed to the Kippen’s house. “I need to have PE with Buffy at all costs next year. If not, I’ll definitely get picked last for every team.”

“You’re already stressed out for PE next year?” TJ snickered. He knew Cyrus well enough at this point to know his fear of public humiliation in PE was insurmountable “You need to relax a little. It’s summer break.”

“I know, but I tend to plan every minute of my future and PE is an inevitable part of it.”

“Let’s make a deal. You put off thinking about PE until a month before school, and I’ll let you be there when I get my report card in the mail.” TJ liked to open his report card alone considering he has done really bad in math in the past, but Cyrus really wanted to see how much TJ had improved now that he had a proper tutor.

Cyrus hummed to himself before saying, “Deal. But only because I can’t wait to see the look on your face when you see how well you did.”

“My C average does bring out my best smile.”

“All of your smiles are your best smiles.”

“You literally told me my dancing to old music is my best smile.”

“It’s a little biased because you dance with me.”

“It does make me smile when you slow dance with me,” TJ admitted to him. Cyrus smiled, blushing at the comment and making TJ’s heart skip a beat. There hadn’t been a single day where TJ doubted his feelings for him.

They got to the Kippen’s empty house, Macaroni the cat waiting in the yard. He was jumping after a grasshopper before he saw Cyrus and TJ come up. He ran to Cyrus and meowed, making him grin. “Hello, friend,” Cyrus said as he bent over to pick him up.

“Needy,” TJ muttered to Macaroni as he roughly petted his ears. Macaroni swatted at TJ who pulled his hand away on time.

Cyrus held Macaroni closer and said, “You have to be gentle with him. He’s old.”

“He’s okay,” TJ said, sticking his tongue out at the cat. He went to go unlock the door while Cyrus asked Macaroni about his day. The cat simply purred in his arms.

Inside, Cyrus put him down and followed TJ without asking upstairs to his room, little footprints tapping against the wood floors. Cyrus felt like the Kippen’s gothic house was his second home. It was Halloween themed according to his parents, but he liked the charm it gave off. TJ’s parents were younger than his after all and when the air was clear, it was fun to be there.

TJ had two boxes on the floor ready to go. “Can you take the vinyl one? It’s lighter,” TJ asked Cyrus as he picked up a box.

“For sure,” Cyrus said. He got the box and looked around the room that seemed to be more crowded as TJ dug out things from the attic. It made Cyrus smile every time TJ called him with a new discovery. A new photo album from the 70s. More polaroid photos he took of TJ and Amber when they were little. A random trinket TJ thought was cool. One time he didn’t find anything of his GG’s. He found a bunch of new t-shirts from his dad’s old band and a few CD’s TJ couldn’t stop laughing at for an hour. His dad was in makeup that really did make him look like a vampire.

Cyrus said goodbye to Macaroni who rubbed against his leg before walking out with TJ and walking down to his house. Around the block, people already had their yard sales open and people from all over Shadyside were visiting there. Even though TJ lived so close to him, his neighborhood seemed to be a completely different world from his. TJ didn’t know his next door neighbors, and he had just found out a month ago that Marty had lived across the street from him practically his entire life.

They got to Cyrus’ house where his parents had set out tables. Cyrus’ old toys and clothes were out and ready to go to new homes. He gave up most of his children’s books, but he kept a few favorites just in case he ever had kids to read them to one day. “You’re selling all your Pokemon cards?” TJ asked him as he set his box on an empty table.

“There will be someone who appreciates them more.” Cyrus then added, “They’re also fake.”

“Dollar store packets?” TJ smiled knowingly.

“Yes!” Cyrus laughed. “I always wondered why the ones at Kmart were more expensive and now I know why.”

“They were still fun to play with, though.”

“I honestly never learned how to play with them,” Cyrus admitted. “I just liked looking at them.”

“That’s me with my vinyl records right now,” TJ said. “I opened every single one of them because some had notes and receipts from GG. Some silly stuff like saying to pick up my grandma from school or just lists of other singers.” Cyrus stared at TJ as he set out the records, wondering if now was the time to give him what he just bought him. He wanted to hold out for his birthday but watching TJ talk about the vinyl’s made him realize how much listening to that music meant to him.

“There’s actually something I want to give you,” Cyrus said.

“Now?” TJ raised an eyebrow.

“Think of it as the first part of your birthday present.”

“First part? Of my birthday present? My birthday that’s in July?”

“Yes. Yes. Yes,” Cyrus nodded. “So, do you want it or not?”

“Can it be the only gift you give me?” TJ asked him.

“Of course not. The other thing is on its way already.”

“Oh god, Cyrus. You really didn’t have to get me anything.”

“Says the guy that gave me a present everyday of the week leading up to my birthday.” TJ smiled, Cyrus knowing that he finally got him to give in.

“Fine. Surprise me.”

Cyrus took TJ’s hand. “Come on! I can’t wait for you to see it.” Cyrus led TJ inside his house where they walked past his parents, TJ barely able to say a full hello to them. They went into his room where Cyrus let go of his hand and dug through his t-shirt drawer where he pulled out a wrapped present.

“You already wrapped it?” TJ asked, smiling as Cyrus handed him the box.

“Had to be ready just in case you ever found it.”

“You’re the one that snoops through my things, not me,” TJ reminded him.

“Just open in,” Cyrus said impatiently. TJ put the present on the bed and started ripping the wrapper. With a single tear down the middle, TJ knew what it was and gasped.

“Cyrus,” he whispered. “You really shouldn’t have.”

“I wanted to. Really badly.” TJ finished unwrapping the green record player and held out the box in his hands, staring at it in awe. “Now you can listen to everything your GG left you.”

“Yeah,” TJ said with a smile. “I really can.” He put the box down and went over to face Cyrus. “Thank you so much.” TJ bent down and kissed him, both smiling into the kiss.

“You are very welcome.”

TJ held onto Cyrus’ hand and told him, “Let’s go play some music.”

#shoosh star #andi mack #tyrus #tjs playlist

53 notes · View notes

airplanelanding · 4 years ago

Note

Ok. Bestie.

ARE YOU DONE YET?????

Because in your multitude of asks (that I’m so fucking glad for like pls you have no idea how happy that made me, I was legit grinning like an idiot and squealing), it stopped at Unsaid Emily so I’m DYING to know what you thought of the last episode with Stand Tall!!!!!

And now I can talk to you about JATP!!!!

Like what’s your favourite song (songs cuz I know that it’s impossible to choose)?

Who do you ship?

Which scenes are your favourites?

Which OUTFITS do you like best?

What are your favourite dynamics in the show?

What are the moments you thought were funniest?

And stuff like that ☺️ (😂😂😂)

Ahsgsgshshkahs you have no idea how happy I am rn 😂😂

(Btw I see and appreciate your spam of my JATP shit 😂)

(And the Leon/Gwaine fic is coming, I promise! I have the thing planned out and I started writing the beginning! It’s not going to be rlly long because I don’t have much time so I guess we’ll see when I’m done 😂)

Ok. Lyl.

YES I'M DONE!!!!

Oh my GODS WHY DIDNT I WATCH THIS SOONER?!? I finished it at like 2 am last night and was SO UPSET bc I want more😭😭The last performance??? Fucking GREAT! DGHAJDJAKKF B O B B Y—

OH AND THE LUKE PART??!?!? SGAHDJAJJFG OKAY LOOK THE WHOLE FINAL EPISODE STRESDED ME OUT UNTIL THAT PERFORMANCE I COULD N O T STOP GRINNING

(Also can we just take a moment to talk about the chemistry scene ????)

AND THE E N D OHMY G O D S DGAHDJAJF I DONT WANNA SPOIL IT FOR ANYONE IN CASE SOMEONE SEES THIS WHO HASNT WATCHED IT BUT YOU KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT HOLY SH I T

Okokokok

Like what’s your favourite song (songs cuz I know that it’s impossible to choose)?

• Okay like, obviously I love them all, but fuck Unsaid Emily hit me so hard, I don't think I've cried like that since I heard Just Like You by Annika Rose for the first time. I also really liked All Eyes On Me and Finally Free. (I can't lie, The Other Side of Hollywood was good too and I liked it but I just...Caleb.)😂😂😂

Which scenes are your favourites?

• Oh gods okay— first of all just

"This is my first haunting, I wanna make it special."

Um, oh and Reggie about the cheerleaders at the beginning. I really loved the scene in the Stand Tall at the end.

THE "you have some magic of your own" SCENE DGAJDJAJF

Oh, the Chemistry scene with "Girls am I right?" "Yeah.." "No😃"

Reggie thinking Ray was talking to him in the studio.

"Dude, you're a ghost, just poof out." "don't tell me how to ghost!!!"

"Woke, that's a cool word... what does is it mean?" "No clue."

Just...Carlos. Anything with Carlos & the boys.

Oh, and the scene at Bobby's house, just that whole part.

REGGIE LEARNING ABOUT THE STAR WARS UPDATES

Dgajdhjadjjahf i have so many 😭😂😭

Which OUTFITS do you like best?

• Okay I LOVED Julie's outfit for All Eyes On Me, but the boys?? Loved their outfits for Stand Tall at the end. And Julie's for that matter. Oh and I loved her outfit for Edge of Great so much, like one is by far one of my favourites, it's so PRETTY

Who do you ship?

• agdhajdjsjt I don't feel qualified to answer this 😂😂😭😭 idek yet I mean like obviously Alex and Willie bc they had their whole thing, and y'know Luke and Julie too bc seriously the way they interact I just—

• But like I'm unsure who to ship Reggie with😭😭 (though that boy got real flustered at the chemistry scene 😂😂 I'm sorry I'm not going to get over that, they're reactions after the fact were fucking perfect)

What are your favourite dynamics in the show?

• I loved Julie and Flynn's friendship (literally their introductions were great), but I also loved the dynamic between Julie and Ray, I mean like... Ray was so supportive and happy for Julie, even though she snuck out, and he cared so much about her being able to pursue music like she wanted to that he was looking for new schools with music programs the moment he found out she wouldn't be let back in, and this man was literally ready to up and move his whole life to a new house just because Julie had wanted to move. Not to mention just the rest of their interactions. Idk, he's just... a really good dad, and I loved the portrayal of a good father-daughter relationship.

What are the moments you thought were funniest?

• A lot of my favourite moments tbh.

• Though, Reggie scaring the shit out of Carlos & Julie's aunt, killed me. Especially his little pause and "words hurt" when she called him a demon 😭😂

I'm just like dying for more now and so upset there isn't any more bc sgajdjambfbg

You get what I mean.

😂😭😂

(Also I'm glad you liked the spam bc I was literally screaming and just needed to freak out to someone 😂😂😂)

(Oh, and don't rush yourself! It doesn't have to be long!! I'm just excited to see whatever you come up with!!! 💕💕💕)

#jatp #does this count as #jatp spoilers #???#i mean I'm going to tag it just in case???#but does this count as spoilers??#maybe bc i added direct scene references...#idk #I'm still screaming #it was so good oh my gods #I'm so glad i watched it #but now I'm crying bc i want more

6 notes · View notes

mca-attack21 · 5 years ago

Text

Crash

This is part 1 of 2 of Crash. It is a Lucifer x Reader Imagine. Honestly, I don’t know exactly how I feel about it, but full send.

It was a rare occurrence that you and Lucifer got a night off between your work at the precinct and the celestial drama that came with dating the literal devil. That is one reason that you were so excited about tonight. It was the two year anniversary of your partnership with Lucifer and your guys’ one year anniversary as a couple. Both of you had agreed to put your other obligations aside for one night. It didn’t matter if someone was murdered, if the streets caught fire, or if it started raining frogs, this date was happening. At least that is what you thought.

You were at your apartment getting ready, being interrupted occasionally by texts from Lucifer. He was even more eager for tonight than you were. He had planned the entire thing meticulously with help from Ella. He wanted everything to be perfect because tonight was finally the night that he was going to propose.

The old Lucifer would have never considered marriage, the thought of being tied down to one girl for the rest of his life, which was literally forever, was completely unappealing. He could never imagine wanting that, especially when he got to experience an endless party with all of the sex he could ever dream of. That was at least until he met you. He soon came to realize that one meaningful relationship with the right person was everything he never knew that he wanted. Sure, there were snags along the way, but he couldn’t imagine ever being with anyone else. When he thought about what he truly desired most, it was you. In a way, it had always been you.

He arrived at the restaurant twenty minutes early to make sure that everything was set up just the way he wanted. He took the ring out of his pocket and placed it on the table, then decided against that placing it back in his pocket. To say that he was nervous would be slightly underselling it. He knew that he had no reason to be, but he really couldn’t help it. He knew that this was going to be one of those moments that neither of you would ever forget. Taking a drink from his flask, he decided to text Ella in an attempt to make the time pass faster.

His phone started ringing which brought a smile to his face as he saw your name and goofy contact picture which accompanied it. He wasted no time answering it, “Aw, Y/n love, how far out are you?”

“Lucifer,” you started.

Something was wrong, he could tell by your voice. He stood up and went towards the bathroom so he could hear you better.

“Y/n? Are you okay? What’s going on?” he asked.

“It’s the car from the other day, it’s following me again,” you explained trying to stay calm.

“Where are you right now?” he asked already fumbling for his keys.

“I’m about five minutes from the restaurant, I went the back way. Oh god,”

“What? What’s happening?” he questioned as he ran out to his car.

“They’re trying to run me off the road,” you cried as the car hit into your own causing you to momentarily lose control and scream.

“Y/n? Y/n!” Lucifer yelled as he sped in your direction.

“It’s okay, I’m-”

That was the last thing you said before Lucifer was forced to listen to the crash. He yelled into the phone begging for a response, but to no avail. He reluctantly hung up in order to call 911. It felt like an eternity before he arrived at the crash site.

He barely put the car in park before sprinting over to your car which was upside down in a ditch completely mangled. Your car was smoking, which was not a good sign. Between that and how dark it was, it was very hard to see. He knelt down and tried to get a good look at you and the position you were in. He knew that the smoke meant the entire car was at risk of catching on fire and that he didn’t have much time to get you out. He could see blood but wasn’t able to make out the source of the injury.

“Lucifer?” you coughed, barely audible.

“It’s okay Y/n, I’m right here. You’re going to be fine,” he said as he used his strength to pull off the driver’s side door.

“Okay, I’m going to get you out of here. Can you put your hands on the roof?” he asked.

You nodded and repositioned yourself yelping in pain.

“Attagirl, now I’m gonna undo your seat belt and get you out of there. Ready? 3-2-1” he spoke as he undid your seatbelt and pulled you out of the car. He carried you a safe distance away trying to be careful not to cause any further damage, laying you down and gently resting your head in his lap.

“Can you tell me where it hurts?” he asked as he scanned you for potential injuries. It was then that he noticed the piece of glass sticking out of your stomach.

“It doesn’t hurt,” you breathed.

Lucifer carefully repositioned himself to apple pressure around the glass to help staunch the bleeding.

“Be thankful for the adrenaline darling,” he replied checking for any other obvious injuries.

“Is it bad?” you asked trying to sit up to see before Lucifer stopped you.

“You’ll be fine, I just need you to be still until the ambulance gets here.” he answered calmly.

“Some date this is,” you coughed.

“I’ve had worse,” Lucifer laughed.

“Why is it so cold?” you whispered. This caused Lucifer to frown, it wasn’t cold at all. You were in LA in July, it had to be around 70*. Regardless, he played along wishing the ambulance would arrive already.

“I don’t know, but here’s my jacket,” he said as he laid it over you and repositioned himself to apply more pressure.

“Always such a gentleman,” you said causing you to cough again. This time there was blood in your mouth.

“Okay, that’s enough out of you,” he quipped trying to hide his concern.

You frowned but couldn’t care too much, everything was starting to numb out. You were struggling to focus. Exhaustion was taking over your senses. Lucifer seemed to notice this and started talking to you again, but it was like he was speaking a different language. You could hear him, but you couldn’t understand him.

You were still conscious when the ambulance arrived and Lucifer hoped in with you. He continued to talk to you, but it was like you were underwater, nothing seemed real. His worried face was the last thing you remembered seeing before the drugs kicked in.

#Lucifer #lucifer morningstar #lucifer x reader #lucifer imagines #lucifer fox #lucifer imagine #lucifer morningstar imagines #lucifer morningstar imagine #lucifer morningstar x reader #lucifer fanfiction #lucifer fandom #lucifer fic #lucifer morningstar fic #lucifer x you #lucifer x y/n #lucifer morningstar x you #lucifer morningstar fanfiction

252 notes · View notes

derireo · 4 years ago

Text

The Disparity Between Mankai Tasuku and Little Bro Tax ↦ Tasuku

Izumi catches Fuyuki blatantly bringing a Christmas tree into the dorm while donning a red suit.

He says it's for his little bro, Tasuku, but it's July. There's literally no reason for this.

warnings: tasuku’s older brother makes an appearance. spoilers? this is based off a twt convo between @.nyaa_gumi and @.kimeyngo about how tasuku would probably still believe in santa.

「 read here on ao3 」「 2.2k words 」

"It's— it's July." Izumi said dumbly as she watched Tasuku's brother, Fuyuki, march into the Mankai dorms with a decently sized Christmas tree under his arm.

"Fuyuki. It's July." She emphasised when he ignored her and continued walking towards the lounge. Her exhale was exasperated while he placed the decoration in the corner, her hands on her hips.

He turned around with a smile, a smile similar to Tasuku's but much more kinder. It didn't seem like he cared that it was July, and even gestured towards the red suit he was wearing.

"Tasuku was worried he wasn't going to celebrate Christmas this year." He explained, readjusting the hat on his head.

Izumi clearly didn't know what that meant, so Fuyuki sighed and held his arms wide open as a gesture to himself. "I'm just bringing home the holiday a little early."

"Okay. But at the dorm?" The director asked pathetically; she was already worried about Sakyo's reaction if he saw what was happening right now.

With an affirmative nod the man dressed in red then saluted Izumi, sending her a wink.

"Can't expect a busy man like him to come home whenever he wants."

"You're lucky all the kids are out and Sakyo's working." She sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. The sunshines would probably be ecstatic over a little scene like this despite the month they were in right now, and Sakyo would without a doubt kick the shit out of Fuyuki.

"And what's with the suit." Her hand gestured towards his get up with a loose wrist while her mouth twisted with disgust. Not that she really minded, but the fake gut wasn't doing Fuyuki any justice.

He had a fake beard hanging loose around his neck while his hat was lopsided, but the man standing in front of her looked excited.

"You'll see." He said cryptically. He began to put everything on properly as Izumi was left dumbfounded by the incredulous situation. The sound of familiar footsteps began to come down the hallway, and Izumi realised it was Tasuku.

Both her and Fuyuki looked at each other, the woman's gaze more full of doubt while the man held a hint of mirth. What reaction were they going to receive?

"Morning." Tasuku greeted Izumi with a yawn, eyes half closed as he stretched his arms above his head. His sigh was full of satisfaction as his muscles loosened, and he opened his eyes when Izumi didn't respond right away.

"Hey, are you good—" He paused when he saw Fuyuki. He blinked once. Then twice. He stared dumbly at the man in the centre of the lounge, the person who was obviously his brother, and covered his mouth with his hand.

Izumi could hear his breath hitch.

"..Santa?"

Okay, hold on.

"Tasuku—" Izumi started, but Fuyuki interrupted her before she could ruin the moment."

"Merry Christmas, Tasuku." He said; voice almost unchanged as he pat his gut and gave a hefty wave to his brother.

Tasuku continued to stare, his face stuck between confusion and... childish excitement. The exasperation Izumi felt right at this moment left her stomach swooping when she watched Tasuku run a hand through is hair; as if he couldn't believe that they had the Santa in their home right now.

And in July no less. Dear god.

"Why—" Tasuku choked on his question and looked back between Fuyuki and Izumi with a troubled look, his eyes sad all of a sudden. "Fuyuki isn't here to see him."

"Wha— okay." The absurdity was getting a little too much to handle, but Izumi couldn't bring herself to confess that his brother was literally right there. She held her cheek in her palm, looking hopeless as she waved Tasuku over to sit on the couch, needlessly patting his head when he did so obediently.

"Santa's here because he heard you were worried about not being able to celebrate Christmas this December." Izumi said slowly, sitting down on the arm of the sofa while glaring at Fuyuki who was nodding in approval. "Did you say anything about that, Tasuku?"

The gentle prod by Izumi had the actor nodding. But Tasuku was way too busy marvelling at how he was seeing Santa in the flesh; his heart feeling like it was going to burst. Santa was here for him?

The man fiddled awkwardly with his hands while Izumi casually curled an arm around his shoulders, the woman sending an expectant look in the direction of Fuyuki who was still standing there doing nothing.

She was given another subtle wink as if to put her mind at ease, and suddenly, he was procuring a huge ass gift out of no where.

Magician Chikage who?

"I know it's still July, but I got you a little something, kiddo." Fuyuki crooned, waving the wrapped up gift in his hands in the air.

He tossed the box towards Tasuku and Izumi and the man easily caught it while Izumi flinched in surprise. There was a sparkle to Tasuku's eyes as he looked at the item in his hold, and with a nod from Santa, began to rip it open.

Izumi could only watch on with amazement. Six foot tall Tasuku with hulking shoulders and a broad chest— a man who was almost always frowning.. was now looking like a child on Christmas.

"Holy shit." Tasuku groaned, leaning back onto Izumi's shoulder once he saw what it was Fuyuki got him as a gift. "I've been meaning to get these mini soccer nets for so long." He whispered under his breath, staring wide eyed at Izumi who was giving him a weak smile.

She couldn't believe this was going so well.

"Thank you so much." Tasuku frowned. It looked like he was about cry; and having been awake for barely an hour and seeing Santa in that short time span, it was understandable.

With eyes smiling, Fuyuki shook his head while Izumi sighed and pet Tasuku's hair as he began to rip the box apart, the soccer goals springing out onto the floor.

"I'm gonna go get my soccer ball." Tasuku said quickly as both him and Izumi noticed that Fuyuki looked just about ready to leave, and the younger brother stood up to scurry towards his room leaving his director and brother in the lounge.

"Oh my god. Go freakin' change in my room before Tasuku gets back." Izumi whisper shouted once the actor was out of sight and began to push Fuyuki down the other hallway where her room was. "I can't believe this."

"He'll get suspicious if Santa leaves without saying goodbye—" He complained, but Izumi was quick to shove him into her room.

"Yeah, well, Santa doesn't fuckin' play soccer, dumbass." She hissed and shut the door without letting the man have one more word in. After the whole debacle they just went through, she was not going to let Tasuku find out that Santa was actually Fuyuki in disguise.

By the time she has gotten back to the lounge, Tasuku was already looking around in confusion, wondering where she and Santa had went.

The soccer ball he always brought around with him when they went to the park was under his arm while he held the mini nets in one hand. He was frowning when he saw Izumi come back and trudged towards her with his shoulders shrinking in; head dipping down to whisper in her ear.

"Where'd Santa go?" He murmured lowly.

His voice almost sounded like he was going to kill her, but when Izumi looked up, the expression on his face was crestfallen. She had to sigh. She couldn't tell if Tasuku was just a really good actor or if Fuyuki actually managed to pull this bullshit off.

"Had to leave real quick. There was a problem at the workshop."

"..The workshop is open right now?"

"I don't know, Tasu." Izumi held back a sigh and gestured towards the nets. "He got you that, didn't he? Come on, let's go play." She shook her head and reached out to grab Tasuku's wrist, and just as they were about to head out to the courtyard, Fuyuki exited Izumi's bedroom in his casual clothing.

The sight of him left Izumi inwardly groaning as Tasuku had paused in his movements, staring across the hallway at his brother who was shamelessly waving at the pair.

"Fuyuki. You were here?" Tasuku asked. As if the sudden appearance of his brother wasn't a tell tale sign that.. Santa may not have been here at all.

Izumi wanted to sit down and just take a break.

"Yep. Thought I'd stop by and visit, but I was super tired when I got here! Izumi-chan let me take a nap in her room."

"...You don't have a thing going on with my director, right?"

"What. Tasuku, come on." Izumi rolled her eyes at the sudden possessiveness and motioned for Fuyuki to join them as they continued to head towards the courtyard. What was amusing to Izumi was that Tasuku's tone when talking to his brother was almost monotone and uninterested while with 'Santa', that was probably the most ecstatic she's ever heard him.

"Well, I mean.. Hey, I was just joking— ow!" A punch to the gut by Izumi was what made Fuyuki double over on the grass once they made it outside and Tasuku smiled. Just a little. The actor began to set up the small nets as Izumi continued to kick at Fuyuki until he begged for her to stop and tossed the soccer ball in her direction. Izumi took it as her chance to slam the ball down onto the back of Fuyuki's head with a menacing grin, and the older brother cried out miserably while Tasuku went to fetch the ball.

"You missed Saint Nick." Tasuku commented casually and set the soccer ball down in the grass, dribbling it between his two feet as he waited for Izumi and Fuyuki to stop bickering.

"Damn. Really?" Fuyuki muttered as Izumi knocked him over again, the poor man flailing. "Shit— stop. I want to hear more about Santa, Izumi!"

And with that, the director relented. She put her foot back down on the ground and snarled down at the man who was still laying in the grass, her eyes filled with disgust for the person who was looking up at her with pleading puppy dog eyes.

The pause gave Tasuku enough time to begin rambling off his and Izumi's short time with Santa, his face suddenly lighting up like a newly screwed in light bulb in the washroom. The soccer ball was being juggled by his feet with ease as the other two watched on with intrigue, acting surprised and just as enthusiastic about the situation to make sure Tasuku didn't catch onto their lies.

Fuyuki expressed his regret for napping so long in Izumi's room, making an excuse that he loved the scent of her sheets so much that he didn't want to leave (which earned him another punch) while trapping the ball to his chest when his brother kicked it to him.

Everyone then began to confess their own thoughts about Santa and how their interaction with him went (except for Fuyuki. But he claimed he had met the man a few times in the past, even gloating to Izumi about it for some reason).

They were all having so much fun just chatting and playing around with Tasuku's new present that by the time they had realised it, it was the evening, and Sakyo had come down to ask a very important question.

"Why the hell is there a Christmas tree in the lounge?" He sighed irritably, exhausted from his long day at work. When he came home, the younger actors were staring at the tree in wonder and asked Sakyo if he was the one to put it there before he left for work. Not really one of the stupidest questions the man has been asked, but still, pretty stupid.

It was July.

"And who brought it home?" He gritted when the trio ignored him, happily throwing the soccer ball to each other with their hands after giving up kicking it around in the dirt like boring people do (noah fence).

"Santa!" "Rugby!"

Tasuku shouted at the same time as Izumi when Fuyuki caught the ball in his hands and the woman suddenly launched herself at him, body tackling him to the ground to make him drop the ball.

"Oh, the joys of Christmas." Izumi tittered whilst the scream that left Fuyuki's mouth probably woke up a few of their neighbours. The obscure comment left Sakyo confused and at the same time pissed off, and when Tasuku or his brother didn't offer anything else to add on, the blond left the courtyard without another word; only hoping that Fuyuki would take his tree with him once he left for home.

Of course Fuyuki would be the only one able to bring a Christmas tree here.

Izumi never would have had the time and Tasuku didn't seem keen on celebrating the holidays.

But there was still one thing lingering in Sakyo's mind as he walked back inside.

...Why was there a Santa hat poking out from underneath Izumi's door?

#bye LMFAO #a3!#a3! act! addict! actors!#A3! Actor Training Game #a3! fic #a3! imagines #a3! scenarios #a3! headcanons #tasuku takato #fuyuki takato #izumi tachibana #sakyo furuichi #this is so fuckin dumb lmao feakdfhkjfh

25 notes · View notes

komkommertijd · 4 years ago

Text

Toronto Log Day 1

July 7, 2019

Looking at the date today and realizing that it’s really been a year since my summer holiday adventure feels so unreal but I really am motivated to start this little series here today. A few days ago I made a post asking about who would be interested in reading about the weird things I got up to while abroad and I was so happy when I received some answers - I’d probably write this anyway even without anyone paying attention to it, because this is mostly still a thing for myself to relive all the happy moments, but it’s nice knowing that someone cares.

This entire thing started back in 6th grade when I accidentally started getting addicted to sports of all kinds of forms. Ice hockey has always seemed cool to me and it felt fairly easy to get into it. I don’t know why or how it happened but from day one until today, I’ve always supported the same team in the NHL, despite all the pain it inevitably comes with. The Toronto Maple Leafs just had something about them, looking back I’m pretty sure that this “something” is Mitch Marner, that made me want to get into the sport more. Ever since then, my love for the city started growing and it is still always expanding day by day.

Toronto just drew me in, in a way no other city ever managed to, so when I turned 14, the idea of going on an exchange trip slowly started forming in my head. My English at the time was good for the average 8th grader and I had the best teacher ever that year, who further encouraged me to spend some time abroad - he even talked to my mother about it when she dropped me off for a field trip one day.

I already knew that I wanted to go to either Canada or Australia, but obviously it’s not the smartest idea to send a young kid on a day-long plane trip on their own and Australia seemed like the smarter option to visit for an entire year instead of just a few weeks during summer break. When I stepped up to info points at a language exchange fair in my Maple Leafs jersey, it was pretty clear where this was going to go.

The months leading up to the trip were a weird combination of excitement and anxiety, getting a passport, doing a language test, booking a flight. I still remember receiving the email of my eTA being approved barely six days before leaving the country.

After a road trip from the most Eastern end of Germany all the way to Frankfurt Main, plus staying a night at my godmother’s place, right after the last day of school, the big day finally came. The airport in Frankfurt is the largest one in Germany and therefore quite overwhelming when one is confronted with it for the first time. To make things worse, the police had to close some part of the airport so I had to find a way around that area to get to the baggage drop-off. The lines divided into flights to the US and flights to the rest of the world, so my mom got in line with me and my brother. The worst thing was saying goodbye to them in front of the safety check and I swear I cried harder than ever before.

The fear of being on my own settled slightly after I survived the security check and got in line to get my passport checked but inevitably returned when I noticed that boarding would start soon and I had no idea which gate to go to. The guy behind the counter was really nice, telling me to have fun in school in Canada before I was allowed to leave. I arrived at my gate literally right when boarding started and somehow got to my designated seat without too much trouble. It was my first time ever leaving Europe, ever flying on my own and spending more than three hours on a plane, and I was weirdly hyped. I survived the eight hours on my way across the Atlantic Ocean with some actually tasty food, three cups of coke, half a liter of water and not a single toilet break.

Seeing the CN Tower during the landing approach made me a lot more emotional than I wanted to be. It’s still surreal to think that all of this actually happened and seeing the skyline live for the first time is something I’ll remember forever. It was warm when I got out of the plane at around 6 pm and tried hacking the airport WiFi to text my mom that I arrived safely (it was 12 am in Germany, sorry mom). Going through the procedure of declaring my goods was something new entirely and I guess I would’ve died there if my English wasn’t on a general level of acceptance. The guy filling out my form looked at me like I was trying to prank him when I told him that the only real good I was sneaking into the country was mustard (the present for my host family because my home town produces one of Germany’s most well-known mustards, it’s weird) and he struggled with trying to read my German papers about the travel details but ended up figuring out that I wasn’t lying about staying three weeks to waste my summer vacation in school on the other side of the world.

I somehow found the woman in charge of coordinating our shuttles to our host families or the student’s residence, depending on where each of us chose to stay, and followed her outside into the mess that was the traffic right in front of YYZ. I met another German girl there and started talking to her for a while until we got scolded for not talking in English. The Italian students continued arguing about God knows what while I tried to calm myself down as I watched an Audi drive by - a bit of familiarity 6.5 thousand kilometers away from home.

My legs were cramping and my sweatpants started feeling a bit sticky in the unexpected warmth of the evening and when I dragged my way too huge suitcase up the driveway of a house in Etobicoke, not too far away from the airport, it all started feeling a bit too real. My Brazilian host family welcomed me with open arms and to this day I’m glad that I got to stay with them, considering all the horror stories I got to hear the following weeks from other students.

I shared a room with Alicja, a Polish girl my age from Warsaw, who reminded me a lot of one of my classmates at first and turned out to be quite a lot more similar to me in some ways than I would’ve expected. We ate our first dinner together and tried to figure out how the hell to get to Adelaide Street East in the middle of downtown Toronto before I spent an hour trying to understand the TTC and almost getting a panic attack about how to use the PRESTO card, which occupies some space in my wallet to this day.

Luckily, our host mother sent us some directions for the following day and provided us both with a token each to get to school after we exchanged numbers and set up a group chat. We figured out that getting to school would take us an hour and a half at least, so we strategically set our alarms to 6:45 am to catch the right bus at 7:20. I was exhausted when I crawled into bed that night with my left leg still cramping once in a while but not jetlagged at all, which seems concerning in hindsight. I struggled with plugging my phone charger into the adapter plug before plugging that into the actual socket and shivered for quite a while before being able to fall asleep - our air-conditioning was broken for some reason and provided us with true Canadian winter vibes (it’s the only way for me to validate the “I survived Canadian cold” button on my backpack).

It felt weird, falling asleep in a bed in a country so far away from home with no one I know around, in a comfortable bed with my favorite pillow that I take everywhere tucked under my head. I arrived, finally, after dreaming about it for so long, and despite not seeing literally anything but the suburbs and some streets so far, it oddly felt a lot like coming home.

#that ended up being way too long i apologize #writing this made me miss toronto so much :(#anyway i hope you like it so far!!#thanks for reading this until the end 🌻#toronto shenanigans™#i apologize for my weird english sjdhs

4 notes · View notes

lorencourtier · 4 years ago

Text

Discord Thread || Loren and Landon

Discord thread featuring: Loren Courtier & Landon Davies ( @davieslandon)

Mentions: Jace @jace-matthews, Aaron @aaronhart93, Claudia @claudiafern96. Roman @romanbeckett, Harry @theharrykingston

When: July 17th

Description: Loren and Landon meet up for coffee to talk about their relatioship.

Trigger Warnings: Abuse, death threats, domination

LANDON Landon got up bright and early (as usual) and used the few hours before Elle woke up to get some things done. He prepared a bag for her for while she was staying with Aaron and even managed to look through some work documents that he brought home with him. Once that was done he started preparing a nice breakfast for them both which Elle really enjoyed once she got up. It didn’t take him long to drop her off with Aaron since she was so excited to see Des again and then he made his way to The Grind. Loren wasn’t there yet so Landon ordered himself a coffee and found a small table at the back to wait. He was quite nervous about their meeting since their interactions through text weren’t the best apart from the group chat, and even those were not always great. Landon saw his ex walk in and waved to get his attention. “Good morning”, he said as soon as Loren sat down in front of him.

Loren. Of course Loren was nervous to see Landon. They hadn’t seen each other face to face since before their break up, and now he was kind of involved with Jace. His nerves were all over the place and his heart was beating so fast he could swear it was visible. He spotted Landon sitting in the back of the grind and he made his way over to sit across from him. “Hey, good morning to you too” he smiled. Running his hand through his messy curls to push them back. “How did you sleep?” he asked. Just trying to make small talk. July 18, 2020

LANDON “Oh, pretty good. Was up kind of early as usual but I think I’m getting used to the strange hours”, he joked. It was so strange to be sitting in front of Loren and not really do anything about it. Before he would have leaned in for a kiss or take his hand or something but now everything was different. Landon found himself unsure of what to say. They needed to talk about everything that happened with a clear head instead of over text but he was scared that it would inevitably turn into an argument. “How have you been?” That was safe enough.

Loren. “Surprising” Loren chuckled softly. Resting his elbow on the table as his fingers fidgeted with his own lips. He has seen Landon in the general chat almost every morning while he had laid awake. But this, being in person and not through text was hard. He just wanted to be closer to the other boy, but the tension was real. His eyes scanning Landons face as he sat quiet for a moment. “I’ve been okay” he lied. “A little anxious and a bit of insomnia. But okay” he nodded. “How about yourself?”

LANDON From the way they were talking, it seemed like they were both in the same boat. Both of them suffering with some sort of insomnia, both of them feeling the tension between them. “I’ve been doing well too. Focusing on work and Elle.” That wasn’t the whole truth. Landon didn’t mention that he’d been suffering from anxiety and panic attacks but now was not the time to talk about that. What else could they really talk about though beyond their current small talk? Landon took a sip of his coffee and then looked at Loren. “So...you and Jace huh?”

Loren. Loren nodded his head to Landons words. The mention of Elle giving him a sharp pain in his heart but he just ignored it. Crossing his arms together over the table as he looked back at his ex. “That’s good” he said softly. Knowing damn well that wasn’t fully true. He knew Landon, and he could see the hurt in his eyes. He had it too, but Loren was usually better at hiding it. That was until Jace was mentioned. His heart nearly dropped into his ass. “Uhm..” he hummed. His fingers fidgeting together once again. It was a nerves tick of his he couldn’t even try and fight. “Yeah, I mean. We’re good friends and he’s been there for me” he said honestly. “He’s a... he’s a good guy.” He didn’t really know what to say beyond that. He didn’t wanna hurt Landon anymore than he already had.

LANDON Landon was hoping that he misunderstood the texts in the group chat and they could have a laugh about it now over coffee. Based on Loren’s reaction, he knew that wasn’t going to be the case. “Right, a good friend”, he said, half-hearted smile on his face. “Well...I’m happy for you. Whatever it is that’s going on.”

Loren. Loren practically starred at Landon across the table. His head shaking slightly at his reaction to his words. “Yeah, a good friend. I didn’t really have anyone else Landon. I was alone and scared and he was there for me. It’s not like you think” he added. “You know I love you. But this is hard... it’s really hard, and I don’t really think you understand what I went through for you.”

LANDON “I don’t know, it sounded like more than just friends to me this morning. But you don’t have to explain yourself to me. I mean, we’re not together so you can do whatever you want.” Landon felt his anger flare up just like it always did at the reminder of what Loren ‘did for him’. He took a deep breath to calm himself down because he knew this wasn’t the time to get angry and defensive, not if they ever wanted to get through this conversation. “Maybe I don’t understand but who’s fault is that? I really don’t know what you expect from me Loren. You break up with me, tell me that I don’t really love you and that you’re leaving and...then you come back. Am I supposed to just forget everything that happened and go back to how things were before?” He ran a hand through his hair then looked directly at Loren. “You keep saying I don’t understand so help me understand.”

Loren. “I’m sorry if that exchange hurt you. But your right, we’re not together. I still don’t want to just rub shit in your face that’s not who I am.” He kept his voice calm but he could see the anger building in Landon and it caused him to sigh. “I told you, Landon. I said that because I didn’t know what else to say. I had to keep you safe. If I told you I loved you and we’d be okay, you’d probably be in the hospital right now. Or dead.” Loren could feel his tears build up just thinking about the whole ordeal. “You wanna understand? Well, understand this. I had a choice to make. I could either let you go and let him have his way with me. Or I could have let him hurt you and maybe even Elle to have his way with me. He beat the shit out of me, he threatened my life. I had no fucking choice” he cried. Maybe he shouldn’t have said all those things in a public place, but there is was. Luckily it was still early enough to be only them and another couple who sat across the room.

LANDON “Wouldn’t you be hurt if I started flirting and telling someone how much I loved them on the chat? Or maybe that’s just me, who knows”, he shrugged. He’d been heading in to Avery’s place when he read the texts exchanged between Loren and Jace and he felt quite blindsided. Landon hadn’t even known they were so close and all of a sudden they were flirting on the group chat for everyone to see? He even found himself texting Aaron to check whether he also saw it as flirting or he was just being paranoid. Landon knew that his ex had been through a lot and that the guy he was dealing with was a nasty piece of work but he was so hurt when Loren first texted him after coming back. He wasn’t in the right state of mind to listen to his side of things. “I just wanted to help you. You didn’t even tell me you were going to see him until you were literally about to walk in”, he said, mind going back to those texts he received and the fear he felt when Loren wouldn’t answer. “And you’re sure he’s gone for good now?” Not for him, Landon was at a point where he didn’t really care much about himself but if there was a potential risk for Elle, then he wanted to know.

Loren. “Yeah, I would be hurt. It would hurt me a lot. Just like it hurt watching you and Khai go back and forth. But I just played into it because I love you and of you’re happy, then by god I’m gonna find a way to be happy for you.” He brought his hand up to wipe his tears away and he sniffles a bit as the tears fell again. “I know you wanted to help me. But you couldn’t. I couldn’t let that happen to you. I couldn’t do it landon” he cried harder. He brought his hands up to cover his face and shook his head. “Yeah, he’s gone. But that doesn’t stop be from looking over my shoulder every time I step out the fucking door. I needed you, and I know I hurt you, but I really needed you.”

LANDON “There’s nothing between me and Khai. We’re just good friends and that’s sort of our way of joking around but there’s never been more than a kiss before I even met you.” It hurt to see Loren in this state but Landon wasn’t sure what he could do. He wanted to attempt to comfort him but wasn’t sure whether he’d be accepted. Hearing about how scared Loren was of leaving his house made up his mind. Landon got up and made his way to the other side pulling Loren in for a hug. “It’s okay, you’re okay”, he said, mumbling comforting words in the other’s hair. “I’m here now.”

Loren. “I believe you, I do” he nodded. His emotions still getting the best of him. He knew how Khai could be just from working with Roman and being friends with Emily, so he tried not to let it go to his head. It just made him sad that he didn’t have that connection with Landon anymore. When Landon made his way to his side of the booth and pulled him in for a hug, it took him a little off guard. He didn’t expect it at all because his ex had been so upset with him. He leaned into the embrace of his ex and cried even harder. God, he had been being such a baby these past few days but he couldn’t help it. “I really am so sorry. I love you. I’ll always love you. Just please don’t hate me.”

LANDON Landon felt him tense up as soon as he wrapped his arms around him and almost moved back but then his ex was leaning into the embrace. Things between them weren’t good and Landon couldn’t possibly know if they ever would be but it still hurt him to see Loren in such a state. Because he still loves him. It didn’t matter how much he said out loud that he didn’t or tried to force himself not to. He did. Saying it out loud was another thing entirely. Landon couldn’t even get himself to say it out loud when they were together for fear of it all blowing up in his face, let alone now that things between them were such a mess. “I don’t hate you, I never did. It’s just...a difficult situation.”

Loren. Loren held onto Landon tightly as he held him. Afraid that when he let go he wouldn’t get the chance to hold him again. It was so comforting in his arms, but also terrifying. Because he did love Landon so damn much. He was the only person who had been there for him through so many bad things. And the only one who truly knew him, good and bad. “I know” he nodded. “I’m sorry I let this happen, and I’m so sorry I hurt you. You gotta know I never would have done that intentionally.” Loren wipes his tears away and brought his hand to Landons cheek. Smiling through his watery eyes at him before licking his lips. He wanted to kiss his ex so bad that it physically hurt. Just looking in to his eyes was painful. That deep blue color almost hypnotizing him as he leaned in a bit closer. “Can I please kiss you?” he asked. Much like he did the first time he had asked to kiss him. His thumb caressing his cheek as he waited for a response.

LANDON Landon didn’t know what to say. Of course he wanted to kiss Loren but there was still so much they needed to talk about and things between them were still up in the air. He was scared that kissing his ex would ruin the little progress he’d made in the past few weeks. But what if this was his last chance? So he bit his lip and after little consideration nodded his head. He was still hurt and unsure about so many things but he couldn’t say no. Landon leaned in and brushed their lips together.

Loren. Loren was honestly scared Landon would turn him down. But once their lips were together he felt his heart sink. His lips melting right into Landons as if nothing between them had ever changed. He kissed him slowly and intimately, savoring each of his lips one at a time with his own. His hands moving to clench around his ex’s face as if he needed to hold him in that moment. God he missed this, he didn’t want it to ever end.

LANDON It almost felt the same like it was before everything went wrong. Like nothing had changed when in reality everything had changed. For those few seconds while they were kissing it was like they were still together and in love, planning their future together but the truth was constantly at the back of his head, a clear reminder that this couldn’t last forever. Landon put his hand on the one on his face, wanting it to last as long as possible. When they pulled back, he rested his head against Loren’s, breathing heavily.

Loren. Loren kissed him for as long as he could before Landon pulled away. His head resting against his ex’s as they both breathed heavily and he kept his eyes closed. He was wrapped up in the moment as he spread his fingers against Landons face to hold onto his hand in reverse. “Please don’t stop” he whispered against his ex’s lips. A soft begging behind his tone as he opened his eyes to look at the man before him. “Please.”

LANDON Landon wanted so badly to listen to Loren’s request. He wanted to lean in and kiss him again until they could forget everything that had happened and move on with their lives as they were doing before. “We shouldn’t do this”, he whispered. “Not like this.”

Loren. Hearing Landons words hurt, and it showed in his eyes. But he nodded anyway, he knew he was right. “I just... you’re right here” his voice broke. He didn’t wanna let go, not again. It was too painful. “You’re right though. I know you’re right. But I just...” He couldn’t even finish his sentence before he was kissing Landon again. This time a bit shorter but definitely just as passionately. “I’m sorry” he whispered as he pulled away. Keeping his eyes closed as he rested his head to his ex’s once again.

LANDON Landon knew he was hurting the other boy but he couldn’t see any other way. They could keep kissing and ignoring any repercussions that could come their way, it’s what they both wanted to do. But Landon needed to be responsible. If they fell back into this without properly talking things out and making decisions they’d just end up arguing again in the future. And yet Landon didn’t stop his ex when he leaned in for another kiss. This was torture. He smiled broken my once they broke up again and he sighed. “I’m not saying never but...don’t you think we should really talk about it first?”

Loren. He kept his eyes closed as he nodded against his ex’s forehead. Soon lifting his head to look directly into his eyes again. “We should.. I know” he said. Trying to keep himself together. It was so hard for Loren, because even though he was the one to break them up. His feelings had never changed. He just wanted to protect him and he did what he had to in order to do so. “So... what.. what should we talk about? I feel like I’ve said so much. I wanna hear how you feel.” He kept holding onto Landons hand, afraid if he let go he’d be gone. But he tried to be as responsible as possible. If not for Landon or himself, at least for Elle.

LANDON Now that it was his turn to talk Landon wasn’t sure what he was even going to say. He didn’t feel like he was ready to let Loren into his life again even though he understood his reasons for doing what he did a little better now. At the same time he didn’t want to let him go because his feelings for his ex were still real. He wasn’t sure how he was going to word all this but he needed to try. Loren deserved the truth. “I get why you did what you did. Don’t get me wrong, I still thing there was another way but I do understand. That doesn’t make things any easier though. Giving us a try...it was already a risk the first time because of what I’ve been through before and Elle. Now ini feel like that risk has increased ten fold”, he admitted. “I don’t want to lose you but I don’t think I’m ready for things to go on the same way. I mean...you were about to meet Elle and now...I’m not ready for that anymore.” Landon wasn’t sure he was making any sense but at least he was talking about it. That had to be a start.

Loren. The words that came from Landons lips definitely stung. He couldn’t really understand how it was so easy for his ex to just back up. Or how he could feel like the risk had increased. But he wasn’t going to question it. Landon has every right to feel the way he did. Just as Loren did when he broke up with him in the first place. It just hurt him so much, because he felt like he went through it all just to be with Landon, and now he couldn’t. “I understand” he nodded. Letting go of his hand and pushing his hair back from his face. Of course he didn’t really understand. He was one of those guys that strongly believed if you loved someone you should just love them. But maybe that’s how he ended up in Jaces bed as well. “I just don’t want to hurt you anymore Landon. I don’t know what you want... but I can leave you alone to figure it out. I’m sorry I made things so hard for you. But I meant it when I said you deserve to be loved, and that you are the best thing that ever happened to me. I’ll never forget that.” Oh boy, here came the tears again. He was just a mess.

LANDON Loren said he understood but did he really? He looked like Landon had crushed his hopes and dreams so maybe they weren’t really on the same page. It was times like these that Landon was so jealous of people who just did whatever they felt like at the moment without having to think about a million things first. People without responsibilities. “Wait, what? No, I...I didn’t say I want you to leave me alone.” What was he saying though? Landon wasn’t sure but that definitely wasn’t it. “I guess what I’m saying is that I want to take it slow. And I understand if that’s not something you can do but thats my condition. If you want to give this...us...another try, we have to take things slow. And I don’t want to involve Elle. Not right now and not until I’m sure she’s not going to get hurt as a result of it.”

Loren. It was pretty obvious Loren was an emotional wreck. He was crying off an on and his words were all over the place. No wonder he couldn’t understand anything. He just wanted to held. “Take it slow how!” he asked. “You wanna see other people? You wanna be friends? I’m not sure what you’re trying to say.” The only part of anything that made sense to him was the protection of Elle. He didn’t want that baby hurt, and he certainly didn’t want to be introduced as someone who might leave. “I just... whatever you want Landon. I’m right here and I’m still very much in love with you. I just want you to be happy.”

LANDON Landon winced at the mention of seeing other people but he tried not to hide it. He didn’t want to seem like a jealous person even though at this point anyone who knew him knew he was. “No”, he rushed to explain but then figured Loren said that because it could be something he’s interested in doing. “Unless that’s what you want?” He wasn’t sure of anything anymore. “I just meant taking it slow Loren. Like...not rush into things and see how it goes? Does that make sense?” At least Loren didn’t seem to be against not involving Elle since that was definitely something Landon wouldn’t compromise on. He didn’t think he even could. Considering what Harry thought of his ex, he could imagine him giving his go ahead for Loren to meet Elle any time soon.

Loren. Loren was just confused, and the expression on his face showed it. “So.. like date? But not be together?” he asked trying to clarify what Landon was trying to say. “....and not date anyone else?” He was sure his questions were coming off out of context. Especially after his exchange with Jace in the gc. But he really just wanted to be clear. “I mean, I have been seeing Jace, dating. I guess. But, you’re the one I’m in love with. Which I guess you want me to stop saying?” Loren scrunched his face a bit and shrugged his shoulders. “I just.. I don’t know if I can go backwards if that’s what your asking. I can’t pretend like I don’t already love you.”

LANDON At this point they were probably both confused and just going around in circles. Landon knew it was mostly his fault because he was at a point where he wasn’t even sure of what he wanted. He was about to say just that bit Loren’s words made him pause. “Wait...I thought you said you’re just good friends who love each other in a friendly way”, he said, narrowing his eyes at the other boy. “But now you’re saying you’re dating. I can’t believe you were upset with me for hooking up with someone other than Roman when you’re literally already dating someone.” He knew something was going on between Loren and Jace, it was pretty obvious on the group chat. And he knew for a fact that it wasn’t just about him being jealous because even Aaron saw it. Thinking something and having it confirmed were two very different things. “I guess what I was suggesting was dating and see where that takes us but considering you’re already doing that with Jace, I guess that’s not very original of me.” Landon almost wanted to ignore his ex saying he loved him, especially after him saying he was seeing Jace but it’s not like he could ignore something like that or, at least, he didn’t feel like he could. “I just don’t know what you expect me to say to that.”

Loren. “Yeah; were good friends who went on one date” he tried to clarify. “It’s not like... wait... you hooked up with someone other than Roman?” he asked. Pulling his bottom lip between his teeth to keep from saying anything else until Landon spoke. “I wasn’t upset with you either way. Yeah, jealous. But I wouldn’t be upset with you. We’re not together remember? I’m just trying to figure out if you even want to be together?” They were going round in circles and it was clear that Landon wasn’t really sure what he wanted. But Loren wasn’t really sure he just wanted to sit around loner waiting for him to figure it out. “Well, honestly. I expect you to say it back. You say you do have those feelings and get mad when I say you don’t. But you can’t even say it when it counts the most. Maybe I just need some validation Landon. Even if it is just once.”

LANDON Landon was so sure that he mentioned it to Loren at some point in their texts. “Yeah, I told you about it. Not in detail but I mentioned it and you got upset and asked me why I was surprised you didn’t believe I loved you since I hooked up with someone else.” Loren was making everything sound a lot easier than it actually was. He loved him but what difference was saying it right now going to make? That wasn’t taking it slow and Landon was scared. He was so close to saying it the last time and then Loren broke up with him. What if that happened again? Landon wasn’t sure he could take it if it did. But he was also so tired of his ex implying he didn’t love him when it was almost all he could think about since his return. He was barely getting any sleep at all because thoughts of what he was going to do were waking him up at four in the morning. “Cut me some slack Loren, seriously. You always played the act of being so understanding and telling me you were more than willing to wait for me to be ready to say it then threw it back in my face. I get that you did what you thought was right but that doesn’t mean I can just forget what you said”, he snapped then took a breath to calm himself down. “I love you. Is that what you wanted to hear? I do. But it’s going to take time for me to trust you again.”

Loren. “I don’t remember you saying anything. You told me you were with Roman but, I didn’t know about anyone else. Who was it?” Did he really wanna know! Probably not. But he didn’t wanna be all buddy buddy with the person either. He didn’t mean to come off harsh with any of his words, but his jealous was clear as day. “I am understanding, Landon. I’m trying to be right now as well. But after what I did, I just needed to know it wasn’t for nothing. That you did still love me. It doesn’t matter though, I felt you did. I just...” he shook his head and dropped his head into his hands. Landon was snapping at him and now he says it? “That’s not what I wanted Landon” he teared up again. “I don’t want it to be forced. I just wanted assurance. I wanted to know I wasn’t a fucking fool for waiting or for doing what I did to be with you. I want to be with you, I do. So fucking bad. You’re all I think about and yeah... I went on a date with Jace. He picked me up when I was so broken. But he knows how I feel about you and he knows I want you. The question is do you want me? Do you want only me? And are we going to be able to move past this?”

LANDON Landon wasn't sure he even wanted to tell him. Not because it was some big secret but because it didn't mean anything. They were both going through some sort of breakup and feeling sad about it so at the time it felt only natural to help each other through it. But he knew not saying who it was would only make Loren suspicious. "It was Claudia. We were hanging out together and we were both kind of sad so it just...happened", he shrugged. Landon shook his head, looking helpless. He wasn't sure he could Loren the answers he wanted but he was going to try. "You weren't a fool for waiting. I was going to tell you that I loved you, I was just trying to find the right moment. Was going to say it at the wedding reception but then we both started drinking and I didn't feel like it was the right time. Then everything else happened and...well, you know the rest. Then why go on a date in the first place?" It was moments like these that made Landon realise that hookups and meaningless relationships weren't for him, no matter how much he might have said so to the people close to him after the breakup. Roman was right when he said it was just the hurt feelings talking. He could never date someone knowing they were in love with someone else and nothing could come out of it. And even though Loren was trying to convince him otherwise, this was only reminding him of Aaron's words to him just a few hours before. It sounds like he's playing you. I’m a huge bullshitter as you know. And other bullshitters can see when other people are bullshitting. Landon hadn't wanted to believe it, but now he wasn't so sure. "I want you and I love you, but that's the only thing I'm sure of. That's why I asked if we could maybe take things slow."

Loren. Loren just sat quiet listening to Landon speak. The words hurt, but he couldn’t do anything about it. They were broke up, and he did the same thing with Jace. They were both hurt, and they were both lonely. It was only human to want to find comfort. No matter where or who it came from. “I’m sorry I ruined everything” he said simply. He was at his hearts end. There wasn’t much more he could say about anything, and he was still just as broken as he was when he first walked through the door. Loren definitely had his fair share of meaningless relationship but, Landon wasn’t like that. Landon was the first person he fell for as hard as he did, and now it was just tarnished. It was all his own fault too, which he expected would happen if they ever did end up in this place. It was always his fault. “If you want me to stop seeing Jace I’ll do it” he said simply. He didn’t want to lose Jaces friendship, but Landon was his heart. “I just want you. I’ve always wanted you. That’s not gonna change any time soon.” He grabbed Landons hand again and sighed deeply. “But if you think that just dating and dating around is easier for you. You can do that. I just wanna do whatever you wanna do. You just need to tell me okay?”

LANDON “You don’t have to apologise. What’s done is done and there’s no going back now. We just have to learn to move on”, he shrugged. Did he wish he could go back in time and change things? Of course he did, but that was the story of his life. When he was twenty he wished he could go back and change how things ended with Roman, at twenty two he wanted to go back and change the accident that ruined his life...it was useless wishing for something that could never happen. The sooner he dealt with what reality, the better and Landon had to learn that the hard way. “It’s not about wanting you to stop seeing him. You guys work at the same theater, obviously you’re going to bump into each other. He’s your friend. I just want to know if there’s anything more than that and I want you to be honest. I’m not talking about hook ups or dates but feelings, you know.” Landon nodded in understanding. He didn’t feel ready and there were so many things he was still unsure of but he wasn’t ready to let Loren go, even after everything. “How about we start over? Go on a date, see how it goes and...go from there.”

Loren. Loren nodded his head to Landons words. It was all finally coming together. They both wished they could go back and fix things but Landons suggestion of starting over was the only real way to do that. “Okay, that makes sense” he said softly. “I want us to start over too. Clean slate. I think it’s the best solution to all of this. But can we both please agree to not throw any of this into each other’s faces? Like you said, what’s done is done. I’ll wait for you. I said I would and I meant it. I just got scared I was loosing you and I really don’t want to Landon. I do love you. But I don’t want you to feel pressured saying that either. I know now, and I want you to know it’s okay if you need more time to say it again. I’m here.” A small smile spread across his lips at his ex’s next words and he nodded again. “I’d love to go on a date with you. I’d love that very much actually.”

LANDON Landon couldn’t agree more. After all this was the reason why it took so long for him and Harry to work things out and why they kept getting into arguments. Both of them were bringing up things from the past and throwing it in each other’s faces. It only started getting better once they left the past where it belongs. Maybe it could be the same for him and Loren but they wouldn’t know unless they tried. “That’s fair and you’re right. This is going to end up in failure before we even try if we start bringing up the past every time we don’t like something. We just have to talk about things, we’re adults after all.” Beyond all odds, it seemed like they came to an agreement and we’re going to give it another try. It was much more than Landon was expecting when he first agreed to meet his ex for coffee. “Thank you”, he smiled, referring to so many things. To him accepting his terms, and listening to what he had to say. To agreeing to give them another chance.

Loren. “I just don’t wanna lose you Landon. You mean so much to me and even if things can’t be the same I want you in my life.” Loren was the type of person that once he loved you he never really stopped. He just wanted Landon to be happy again. That’s what mattered most to him now. “We are adults, and I love taking to you. That’s one of our strong qualities usually” he nodded. “But you don’t have to thank me. Im here for you always. I just don’t want to do anything you aren’t comfortable with.” Loren knew that was a lot to ask seeing how he had been seeing Jace. But if Landon wanted him to go slow so would he. Which needless to say was hard for Loren because he already felt so strongly.

#chats:landon #chats:discord #ft.landon #ft.jace #ft.aaron #ft.claudia #ft.roman #ft.harry #tw:abuse #tw.death threat #tw:domination #{Landon Davies;; he's got eyes of the bluest skies as if they thought of rain}

2 notes · View notes