#like wtf dude how did you even get in here? get out of my house

[eternal-kosmo-ghoul]

“even i’m not into that shit”

❤︎ synopsis — the sleep token members being fucking morons and fucking around

pairing: sleep token members x gn!reader (can be platonic or romantic)

theme: crack ✦

a/n: I’M BACK !!!! hopefully i don’t disappear for like a good fifty years after this. this is my third set of stupid ass headcanons. i pulled my shitty humor out of my ass for this one, enjoy !!! (the original ask got swallowed by my dumbass because i accidentally posted the unfinished fic 💀 this is dedicated to my bestie @dead-end-fanfiction)

cw: i think the title speaks for itself

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➵ vessel

i just know this man is the most unhygienic motherfucker to ever exist

more specifically with his teeth. he cannot brush his teeth to save his life

like ??? this all powerful, dark deity, has the most stinky ass breath that if anyone dares to even breath it in, they’d disintegrate on the spot

like what the fuck vessel, you’re better than this

i love vessel but he just does weird shit sometimes

he sleeps butt ass naked

and one time you accidentally walked in on him while he was literally stripping to get ready for bed

he stood there like an npc while you were freaking out

“…. what’s wrong—“ “what’s wrong is that YOU’RE BUTT ASS NAKED IN FRONT OF ME—“

vessel is easily fascinated by human things. i mean - he was once human, so he likes to keep in touch every now and then.

however, out of all of the human things he had to have an obsession with.

… it was rubber ducks

this isn’t even explainable— how do you explain this all-powerful sleep entity to be obsessed with rubber ducks

he literally has a whole room dedicated to his collection of anything rubber duck related. give him a gift that has something to do with ducks and he’s making out with you on the spot

that’s not a joke, he did that with you before

➵ ii

this motherfucker is on his last limb and he’s being held together by paper clips

ii’s not even the leader but he cannot catch a break to save his life

he’s the only one that knows how to cook

one time he left ivy and the vesselettes in the kitchen by themselves. came back to house fires and high pitched screaming that definitely was not from the ladies

ii makes bomb ass banana cream pie though

ik for a fact this man does NOT keep his room clean

you once walked into his room to ask him a favor and there were like - a million drumsticks everywhere on the floor while he sat in the center of it

how does one possess that many drumsticks???

“dude what the f— clean your room!” “it gives me inner peace, y/n. go away.”

ii’s scared of the jollibee mascot

he once went out with his buddies to get some of that fast food. that giant red and yellow fuckass bee then came out of nowhere and spooked the shit out of ii

he then socked the guy in the face so hard the dude wearing the costume had a bloody nose

ii quickly fled the scene to not get arrested

after that he’s had a fear of fast food mascots in general, it’s kinda funny.

don’t bring ii near the jack in the box mascot though, he’s got some trauma from what he’s seen on twitter

➵ iii

zesty ahh mf

plays his bass like he’s fingering someone’s asshole like 🤨 whatcha doin’ iii ??

the type of man to set like fifty million alarms but never wakes up to any of them

however he wakes up everyone else in the process

it gets annoying hearing the “by the seaside” ringtone every morning at 6am. so one day you came into his room and poured ice cold water on him to wake him up

iii didn’t wake up from that btw, you thought it was dead

“…. bro wtf wake up—“

thankfully he wasn’t

biggest kpop stan

he’s a boy group stan and his favorite group is ateez

constantly blasting guerilla too

also i feel like iii owns a tumblr blog too

he’d be out here posting some shih like “pov you’re locked in a room w him for twenty four hours and you have to tickle his balls wyd” 💀

he probably posts also moodboards or some shi and tags them like an actual tumblr blogger

#it took my ahh fifty hours to make this plz repost it

stalks his fans on twitter

gets scared by said fans on twitter

“wdym they wanna get me pregnant”

breaks his bass every four hours during practice and vessel chews his ahh out every time

but it’s funny because you’re always there to help him

➵ ivy

he likes to act like he’s tough shit but ivy is a huge nerd

literally the definition of “magical in bed” except the magic is him explaining the gaming system of magic the gathering

hot asf but has no bitches frfr

also the definition of loser trapped in a hottie’s body

i’d like to believe that ivy has a crunchy ipad kid cough

and i mean CRUNCHY. bro will start choking on his saliva and start coughing like a dying seal

it’s quite hilarious, but also concerning at the same time

the first time you heard him cough like that, you were like 😟

“AEUGH- HEUGH— BEUHSHAK-“ “ivy—“

that pretty sums up the entire interaction

this bitch looks like he ate glue as a kid

more specifically glitter glue. the pink kind.

idk that sounds like ivy

he gets literal death coffee in the morning too btw

no ice. no sugar. straight shots of espresso.

eight shots, btw.

the coffee looks blacker than the black hole.

iii tried some of his coffee one time and spat it all in your face. ivy watched with his hell coffee in hand as you beat the shit out of iii

yeah, safe to say ivy was banned from having that kind of coffee for a while

so yeah. that pretty much sums up the kind of person ivy is

[salmonid-carcass]

This just in: local Au Ra accosted in his own home by pink haired, scissor-wielding hooligan

[newtkive]

pixels [ newt x reader - modern text au ]

ch. 2 - drama queen core

summary: minho's drama finally catches up with him, but newt becomes a hero.

warnings: strong language, mutual pining, none really.

➥ m.list

__

THE GLADE

[ 12:08 PM ]

y/n: gm pookies

newt: it’s the afternoon.

y/n: yeah well

ur east coast

newt: so are you y/n

y/n: FINE BAD MORNING THEN ARE U HAPPY?

minho: drama queen is awake

newt: you’re the drama queen min let’s be fr

minho: u want me to die be honest

newt: see .

tommy: hey guys :3 been waiting for you all

y/n: awwww tommy <3 gm

tommy: morning sweetums

minho: ew stop

newt: how did you sleep?

tommy: good! used my new heated pillow

newt: not you

minho: not you

tommy: wtf

WHO THEN?? THERES LIKE 7 OTHER PPL IN HERE

minho: he means y/n

and there’s 4 other people not including newt and y/n dumbass

y/n: oh

why just me????

newt: cuz you stayed up til 6 am

y/n: ..

how do you know that

newt: i saw you were active on discord

gally: doesn’t that mean you were awake too then

newt: ok and?

minho: thats crazy newt

newt: no it isn’t

i just casually saw it

y/n: hehe

im ok i need to sleep more. sims 4 was really consuming me

why were you awake??

newt: up for work

minho: you get on discord before work?

chronically online..

newt: can you choke and pass out and hit your head please

minho: THE WAY U WANT ME DEAD IS INSANE

y/n: he’s gotta check on his discord hoes before hitting the grind

newt: there are no discord hoes

unless you count thomas

and i don’t

tommy: well why not

newt: because you disgust me

tommy: love u too :3<3

minho: y’all about to kiss aren’t you

newt: never say that shit again im outside your door with a b*mb

minho: why censor it

just blow me up it’s my grandmas house anyway. u want to jump her that bad????

gally: blow that bitch up i say

y/n: HELLO???!,!!

gally: minho not grandma

she loves me cuz im so tall

minho: tall people always gotta remind you they’re tall 😒

like we get it bigfoot

gally: shut up tinkerbell

y/n: you’re somewhat tall minho

minho: any man under 6’0 is considered short

y/n: yeah but newt is 6 ft trapped in a 5’10 body so not totally true

newt: what does that even mean

minho: give me a break

i can tell you exactly what that means

she wanna hit

newt: stop

tommy: don’t get his hopes up

newt: dude

stfu

y/n: what newt said

gally: can we appreciate the only one actually over 6 ft here

minho: no.

tommy: im the same height as newt!!!!

y/n: yea but ur like 3 ft trapped in a 5’10 body tommy not the same

tommy: oh ..

minho: kind of real

newt: can someone kick gally i’m tired of seeing his fucking name on my phone

gally: then turn your phone off don’t you have old ladies to tend to at the library

newt: yeah and they all love me

y/n: so real

if i was old i’d go in there and imagine you’re my young boyfriend and cling to everything u say

tommy: true im the old ladies

y/n: LMAO

minho: write a fanfic y/n why don’t you

newt: yeah you both are old and not beating the dementia allegations

y/n: IM THE YOUNGEST HERE

ur just mad you’re old as dirt

tommy: youth has left you newt and it has turn you bitter in your old age.

minho: thomas knows big words who knew

newt: which word in that sentence was big??

y/n: shut up minho

minho: wtf did i do

y/n: idk but i imagine you sitting there typing on your little phone and i got pissed

minho: WHAT???!.‘wKWHFO

newt: LMAOOOOOOOOOOO

yeah chubby little fingers hitting the wrong letters on his iphone 8

minho: im leaving

tommy: dont leave i forgive you for what you said

minho: i don’t give a damn

y’all mad y’all are all fake im the realest i’ve been prophesizing and reading scriptures 7000 years before y’all fake asses were born be so for real right now

y/n: not reading that

congrats

or sorry for what happened idk

about to drink my coffee in a wine glass

tommy: just drink wine

newt: it’s noon tommy??

tommy: ok and?

newt: explains a lot

minho: no coffee for me this new year only water and pussy juice fr fr

[ newt removed minho from the group ]

tommy: woah

y/n: woah..

newt: i can’t take it anymore

alby: How did you get that access..?

newt: don’t worry about it

in times of need i have to step in like that

y/n: hi alby!

alby: Hey y/n!

tommy: you’re such a hero newt

gally: that was deserved

who wants to play minecraft rn

y/n: me!!

alby: I’ll play, I’m off work today.

y/n: let’s go to the desert i want a camel

gally: alright but then the caves after i wanna mine

newt: if you mine with her you gotta bring extra food and storage when she dies so you can pick up the fallen items

gally: i forget you’re her designated babysitter

y/n: oh please no he isn’t

and i’ll bring my own food

newt: you always say that and then leave it in the stove oven

y/n: WELL I WONT THIS TIME

newt: sure ok

i’ll get on after work

[ alby added minho to the group ]

minho: when i get you.

newt: why did you add him back alby

alby: He was harassing me.

newt: be a man and take it

gally: im leaving

[ gally left the group ]

minho: im going to throw up and die

newt: im staying out of this

minho: (guy who caused it) im staying out of this

y/n: why does gally alwyas leave 😔

newt: why question a gift from the heavens

tommy: get online y/n gally is attacking my dirt house w a pickaxe :((((

y/n: NO IM COMING

minho: im coming to your work newt

newt: okay im locking the door early then

minho: i’ll smash through the glass idc

newt: i’m leaving my shift is over at 1 today.

minho: i’ll use life360 on you

newt: i deleted that app

minho: i’ll stand in the middle of the street

newt: ok let me position my car in front of you

just come to my apartment and we can play w them on pc and xbox

minho: …. fine but i hate your guts

newt: fine

y/n: HURRY GALLY IS ATTACKING MY SHED NOOOOWWW

newt: i’ll just rebuild it

minho: i’ll set it on fire just wait

[askyuuandco]

Twisted Wonderland Incorrect Quotes 20

Yuu & Malleus: walking together

Bully: points at Yuu You look unattractive >:D

Bully: Drives off in bike HAHAHAHA!

Yuu: D':>

Malleus: >:0 …

Bully: still driving away on bike Nothing better than bullying without consequences >:3

Malleus: Teleports in front of his bike

Bully: HUH!?-

Malleus: grabs the bully by the face and let's the guys bike crash

Bully: scared shitless OAO'////

Malleus: calm angry … I'm gonna need you to apologize… ----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Mrs. Shroud: Your Grounded Young man D:<

Mrs. Shroud: No going out for a month >:(

Idia: Really?! OwO

Mrs. Shroud: Yeah and no leaving your room either >:(

Idia: SWEET!

Mrs. Shroud: And no electronics UvU

Idia: reading manga Your the boss :D *closes the door

Mrs. Shroud: >A> !? ---------------------------------------------------------------

General Lilia: HEY! Wake up! >:D

Human! Y/N: Jerjogsejgwe! >A>'///

General Lilia: I just murdered your entire family! >:D

Human! Y/N: B-But I live alone OmO'///

General Lilia: Wah?! Then who are these people in your house?! >m>

Human! Y/N: There's People in my house?! OAO'////

General Lilia: Well not ANYMORE! D:<

General Lilia: DUMB BITCH! D:<

General Lilia: YOU COULD HAVE DIED! D:<

General Lilia: gives middle finger Your Welcome >:( leaves

Human! Y/N:… WTF?! OAO -------------------------------------------------------

Yuu: Dad can I turn up the heat up? :D

Crewel: Don't touch the thermastat Yuu your father gets upset U_U

Yuu: Come on this thing goes up to 90 =v= turns dial

Crowley: PUT BACK THE THERMASTAT!!! D:<

Yuu: EEP! OAO

Crewel: told you =n= ----------------------------------------------------------------

Yuu: how the hell did you get over here? :0

Malleus-Tsum: panic squeaks OMO'////

Yuu: you ran all the way here ._.

Malleus-Tsum: squeaks yes >m<'///

Yuu: That's a good 2 or 3 blocks OnO

Malleus-Tsum: squeaks he knows

Yuu: please tell me you weren't followed >.>'///

Malleus-Tsum: squeaks he was ;n;

Yuu: You were? =n='///

Malleus-Tsum: squeaks yeah ;m;

Dragon! Malleus: angry knocks with claws on Yuu's front door

Malleus-Tsum: EEEEEEKKKKK!!! hides ------------------------------------------------------------------

Floyd: Coffee boys?

Ace: I'm good

Jamil: I have tea so it's fine =v=

Floyd: more for me! UvU

Floyd: I hate this part put coffee beans in mouth >m<

Floyd: puts the hot water in his mouth and is screaming in pain

Ace & Jamil: FLOYD NO!!! OmO'//// ----------------------------------------------------------------

Gn! Yuu: Finally my very own money X>

Gn! Yuu: The world is my oyster! >:3

Gn! Yuu: I can finally really start living >X>

GN! Yuu: spends it all on anime stuff I'm living the big life XD --------------------------------------------------------

Malleus: turns on his computer and it breaks OMG! H-Hello!? OAO

----later----

Idia: Dude here's what I recommend you do…cause clearly you've been having trouble with the double computer set up for like- =-=

Malleus: No the dual PC is great I haven't had like a single problem with it yet >v>'/// Lilia: what do you mean you've never had a problem with it!? Explain all the reasons why you need Idia to be your F*cking Tech Support!?! D:< Idia: and I'm not even good at it =n= Lilia: Idia your the only one he needs but like you gotta use smaller words for him. Don't use the words RAM or CPU he'll get confused =v= Malleus; Ram is memory and CPU is how computer run right? :D Lilia, Idia, and Yuu; >.>' .... Idia: *pinching the bridge of his nose* do you use google chrome? Malleus: I use the basic built in internet- Idia: What....Stop... >:( Lilia: What does that mean? >n> Idia: You use internet edge? >n> Malleus: Edge yeah :D Yuu: NOOOOOOOOO!! Lilia: YOU USE MICROSOFT EDGE?! D:< Malleus: *akward laughing* Yuu: Idia. Can you go to Malleus's house and open up his computer and make sure he didn't put beans or something in there please? =m=

Idia: *Dead pan stare* So...Before Edge Did you just use the internet explorer Malleus: :0 .... Idia: Brooooooo....nooooo=m=

Malleus: *awkward laugh* <XD

[luvhughes43]

secret | luke hughes x zegras!reader

luvhughes43 masterlist🌷

request: can i request being trevor’s sister and secretly dating luke and the boys chirping luke cause reader left hickies on him

word count: 0.5k

you were staying at the Hughes lake house per request of your secret boyfriend Luke Hughes. It made sense anyway, a lot of the umich boys were going and since you went there too they were all your close friends. nobody had any suspicions that you and Luke were even dating… until you had accidentally covered him in hickies during one of your late night make out sessions.

Luke walked out onto the deck, sun glaring in his eyes. he had his curtains drawn when he woke up, and he hadn't bothered peeling them apart before he slipped on his swim shorts. therefore, he had no way to tell that he had hickies littering his neck and down onto his chest. 

You were sat outside with the rest of the boys upon Lukes arrival. you felt your face heat up as soon as you saw the marks trailing down his body. You may have been a little too enthusiastic last night.

It didn't take long for the guys to notice, all quickly chirping him about the mystery girl he was seeing.

“When did you go see this mystery girl? Those look kind of fresh” Cole asked, laughing at the expression on Luke’s face. He looked bewildered, as if he had no idea where the hickies came from in the first place.

“Dude there’s no way he left yesterday he was literally here all night?” Jack answered Cole, a look of confusion with a little hint of pride etched onto his face. there was no way Luke was going around and sneaking girls into the house without anyone realizing. And if that was the case and he was, Jack was a little impressed. 

“Did you sneak someone in last night?” Quinn confusedly questioned, cocking his head to one side as he took in Luke's appearance. 

“Lukey pookie is all grown up!” Trevor singsonged, before seemingly realizing something. His eyes took a sweep around the group and frowned when his eyes settled onto yours. You promptly looked away as you felt the heat from before steadily rise to your cheeks. Trevor had no doubt put it together. You were the only girl in the group, plus you wouldn’t meet his gaze. 

However, if Trevor had known anything, he didn’t say. He tensely laughed along to the rest of the guys chirps as Luke put on a shirt. 

for the rest of your time at the lake house, you and Luke kept things more pg. nobody brought up the mystery girl after that day, and Trevor seemed to have moved on. 

Right as you were about to board your plane back to new york though, you posted on instagram so the boys had something to talk about when you were gone.

ynzegras just posted !

ynzegras

liked by lhughes_06, trevorzegras, and others

ynzegras summer lovin’ had me a blast🤭❤️

tagged: lhughes_06

load more comments

jackhughes trevorzegras u seeing this?🤔

trevorzegras WAIT HOLD ON

lhughes_06 summer loving happened so fast

lhughes_06 love u❤️

ynzegras love u too❤️❤️

trevorzegras 🧍‍♂️

trevorzegras BRO I KNEW IT WTF

dylanduke25 finally now everyone knows🙏

ynzegras hold on how tf do u know?

edwards.73 the walls are thin.

trevorzegras this is the worst day of my life.

jackhughes no this is great if they get married we’ll basically be brothers

_quinnhughes this is the worst day of my life.

[axelsagewrites]

Jon Snow*Blind Date

Pairing: Modern!Jon Snow x f!Reader

Platonic: Sam, Gilly, Cregan, Robb, Sansa, Theon, and Tormund

Summary: Jon's friends bully him into going on a blind date he's sure he will regret but by the end he is head over heels for her

TW: Swearing and inuendo but nothing major

Word count: 3459 (I got carried away lol)

Masterlist Here

“Dude, I said no,” Jon said rejecting Sam’s offer yet again.

Sam and Gilly sat across from the stubborn Snow as they ate lunch and Sam questioned why he even tried. “Why not though?” Sam asked.

“Because I don’t need you to set me up with someone. I can find my own dates,”

“Really?” Sam said staring at Jon in disbelief. Gilly let out a giggle as her boyfriend began to berate the boy, “Last week all you did was write poetry about how alone and sad and moody you were. You’ve went full emo,”

“First of all, that was for class,” Jon glared at Sam only receiving a smirk in return, “Secondly I thought that was private,”

“And if you had a girlfriend then you would know-nothings private,”

“He’s right you know,” Gilly pipped up. Jon liked Gilly. He liked Sam. He liked them together. But right now, he wanted to slap the pair's heads together and storm off. But Jon chose to rise above and be mature.

“Yeah, well fuck you both,” he grumbled as he began to almost stab the food on his tray with his fork. “I’m happy being single,”

“Since when were you happy?” Cregan asked as he sat to join them for lunch.

“Im trying to set Jon up with my mate but he’s being stubborn. As always,”

“Ooo which girl?” Cregan asked before quickly adding “Or guy or whatever it is you’re into. You are into people, aren’t you?”

The three laughed as Jon’s attack on his food increased, “People that aren’t assholes yeah. I don’t get why you’re so insistent on this,”

“Because one day Jon,” Sam folded his arms, leaning on the table, and began his tale, “I’m going to realise I haven’t heard from you in a while and decide hey I should check on him. So, me and Gilly are gonna come over to your sad little apartment and break in. And what will I find? You dead on the couch and Ghost circling your body like a vulture. And I don’t wanna Gilly to see that,”

“Ghost isn’t gonna fucking eat me when I die,” Jon snapped, “Do you really think im gonna die alone? Do you think I can’t get a date that badly?” Gilly, Sam, and Cregan all shared a look “Okay fuck all of you,”

“I just think it’d be good for you to get out the house,” Gilly pipped up and the other two nodded in agreement before she added, “Besides you’ll be less tense if you get laid,” making everyone’s jaws drop, “Im serious. I used to be even more stressed than you Jon and then I met Sam and ever since I’ve just been- “

“I don’t think we need to talk about that darling,” Sam cut her off.

“Seconded,” Cregan said, “but she’s right. You need to get laid,”

Jon sighed and Sam looked between his friends and questioned his life decisions, “While I’d prefer you didn’t just ‘use’ them for sex, I genuinely think you would like them,”

“We didn’t say to use them for sex,” Gilly said but Jon ignored her.

Jon sighed and pushed his tray away since his food was now closer to mush than anything else from his stabbings, “Fine. One date,” Jon said, and the group let out a cheer, “but I swear to god Sam they better not be crazy or something,”

“By something he means ugly,” Cregan said, and Jon slapped the back of his head. “Ow dude wtf?”

Sam grinned, “Don’t worry. I know your type. You’ll like them,”

Jon Snow’s mystery date was all the talk of their friend group. Robb had found out, Tormund found out, and Theon had found out. He even got a text from Sansa about it. all of them bombarded him with tips and tricks and lines to use. Sansa demanded he Facetime her to pick his outfit out.

As Jon was getting ready to leave his room was filled with all said annoying friends bar Sansa but she was texting him so much it felt like she was practically there. “And when you get to the restaurant- “Cregan started, and Jon let out an agonising groan.

“Shut up,” he whined, “I know what to do on a date,”

“We know mate but,” Tormund began, “you haven’t been the same since Ygritte. We just don’t want you giving up if it doesn’t go to plan,”

“I’m not gonna give up,” Jon said as he looked at himself in the mirror. The outfit Sansa bullied him into was a white button-up and weird checked trousers that were ‘trendy’ right now. Jon sighed as he began to unbutton it, “Besides Ygritte was a long time ago,”

She had been his first-ever girlfriend he got the week of university. It was good at first, but they were always fighting and bickering. They were constantly breaking up and getting back together. The whole ordeal lasted a year and messed Jon up. Especially since he didn’t realise, they weren’t getting back together until he found out she was seeing Orell.

“You’re not cancelling,” Sam warned Jon who in return through his shirt at him.

“Im just changing shirts calm down,” he said as he pulled out a black shirt and black jeans. “Do I at least get to know anything about this person before im trapped at a table for an hour with them?”

“They’re in my history of medicine and herbology class, from Kingslanding, same age as us, funny, and extremely sarcastic,” Sam listed.

“Is that it?”

“You’ll have to find the rest out yourself,”

“Do I at least get a name?” Jon asked as he began to tie his doc boot laces.

“(Y/N),”

“Oh, I like them!” Robb pipped up, “Yeah, they tutored me in Dornish lit last year. Only reason I didn’t flunk out,”

“Oh, yay maybe I can study tonight,” Jon deadpanned before turning to look in the mirror, “How do I look?”

“Perfect,” Sam said.

 “Very emo,” Cregan chimed in with a smirk causing Jon to roll his eyes.

“Hot bro,” Theon blew Jon a kiss and received a slap on the head from Cregan. “Can’t a bro appreciate another hot bro?”

Theon was ignored and Robb spoke up, “Sansa’s gonna kill you but you look good dude. Don’t worry. It’s just a date,”

“Im not worried,” Jon lied as he continued to try straightening out his already straight shirt.

Robb grabbed Jon's leather jacket and helped him shrug it on, “Of course not,” he said as he held Jon's shoulders, “You’ve got this,”

Jon was standing outside the restaurant with his gaggle of hens following him, “You’re not coming on this date with me you know?”

Sam rolled his eyes, “I was just gonna point them out then we were gonna head to the The Wall bar encase you need us,”

“I won’t need you,” Jon said causing Sam and Robb to share a look “Shut up,” Jon grumbled as he looked into the restaurant, “So who is it?”

Sam pointed them out and the nerves instantly flooded Jon's system. They had got there early and were already sitting down looking absolutely gorgeous. They weren’t even trying. They were just sitting there playing with a fork and staring out a window and yet Jon was already feeling his mouth go dry, “Dude they’re well out of my league,”

“I said the same thing about Gilly and look at us now. Now go get em tiger,”

“I hate you,” Jon said before walking up to the restaurant door, “Here I go,” Jon took a deep breath and forced himself into the building, throwing a quick glance back to where Robb and Sam were giving him a thumbs up like some kind of child.

“Table for one?” The hostess asked.

Jon cleared his throat, not even sure what name the reservation was under, “I’m meeting someone here. For a date,” he began to stutter and cursed himself mentally, “I think they’re- “

“Jon?” she asked, and he nodded as a blush began to flush his cheeks, “They were sat a few minutes ago. Come with me,” she said and led Jon to his table who was desperately trying to walk normally and not fall into a deep hole and die. “Your dates here,” the hostess grinned as Jon sat down across from his mystery date who even the hostess knew before him. “Here are your menus. Have fun you two,” she said before leaving.

“Hi- “

“I’m- “

“Sorry you go- “

“You go first- “

The pair let out an awkward laugh before she quickly jumped in, “Hey,” she said with a smile stuck to her lips that were perfect just like her smile.

Jon found his face flushing yet again, “Hey. A friend of yours im guessing?” he asked nodding to the hostess who kept glancing at them.

“Yeah,” she laughed despite him not making a joke, “That’s Baela. Sorry if she keeps spying on us. She traded a shift just to watch me crash and burn,” Jon laughed and smiled as a blush filled her face instead of his for once, “Not that I think im gonna crash and burn im sorry let me start again. I’m (Y/N),” she said as she stuck her hand out to shake his and Jon saw her cringe at her own actions.

But he just grinned and shook her hand in return, “I’m Jon,” she took her hand back and his hand had never felt colder.

“Sorry about the handshake,”

“No, it’s good. Handshakes are good,” Jon reassured her, glad that it was not only him sweating buckets over this date. “I’ve never had a date shake my hand before,”

“I’ve never had a blind date before,”

“Me neither. Sam practically bullied me into this. He wouldn’t even tell me your name,”

“Me too,” she grinned. “Well, he let me know your name, but he forbade me to look up your social media,”

“You wouldn’t find much im afraid,”

“Not an Instagram guy?” she asked, and Jon shook his head, “Hmm I suppose I can forgive you,”

“Oh, so kind of you,” Jon said, and she laughed, “I guess we should probably look at the menu. That waiter looks like he’s ready to pounce,”

(Y/N) smiled, opening her menu, but it dropped once she looked up to the waiter, “Oh fuck,”

“What?” Jon asked, dropping his menu and looking to see what she had been staring at. It had been their waiter who had skulked off as soon as she had looked up. “Do you know him?”

“I’m sure it’ll be fine,” she said as she tried to shake it off, but Jon kept looking at her causing her to sigh, “That’s my ex. Baela swore he was off tonight or I would’ve said somewhere else,”

“Is it okay? Do we need to leave?” Jon asked, fully ready to walk half the earth for this girl he had only had half a conversation with.

She sighed and took a second to think “Nah it’ll be fine. Yeah, no it’ll be fine. He broke up with me anyway plus it was like a year ago so like yeah, its fine. Plus, they do a really good cheesecake I wanna get for dessert so its fine,” Jon couldn’t help but find her rambling adorable, but his silence caused her to look at him, “As long as you’re okay with it?”

“As long as the cheesecake as is good as you say,” he joked.

She laughed and picked up her menu, “Oh I promise its more than just good,”

After the pair had looked at the menu their chat was interrupted “(Y/N),” their waiter greeted not even glancing at Jon.

“Ramsay,” she said giving a tight-lipped smile, “How are you?”

“I'm fine. What can I get yous?” he asked and Jon's face contorted at how he didn’t even pretend to be courteous. (Y/N) also appeared shocked as she began to stutter her order and he wrote it down. “What about you?” he asked not even looking at Jon. Jon was so baffled that he didn’t even respond causing Ramsey to ask again “Well?”

“I’ll have the gourmet burger and a coke,”

“You’ll have the Pepsi,” Ramsey said as he turned and walked away from the table.

Jon and (Y/N) looked at each other with a look of half horror half confusion, “Was he always such an asshole?”

“I mean yeah but I assumed he’d at least pretend at work. Im so sorry,”

“Don’t apologise for him,” Jon assured her “Why did you even date him?”

She laughed but her face was anything but happy, “Can we save toxic ex stories for date two?”

“I understand. I mean like. I get it,” Jon said, and relief flooded her face, “We’ve all got some shitty stories I guess?”

“Yeah, but let’s focus on the good ones for now. Baela will kill me if I scare you off before dessert,”

“Good thing I don’t scare easily,”

From there the conversation flowed so easily that even Ramsey's bluntness couldn’t ruin the night. They had so much in common and Sam was right. She was funny and kept up with his quick tongue.

“You’re an idiot if your serious think Aegon the conquering was- “

“Dessert?” Ramsey interrupted their debate as he began to take their plates away.

The pair shared a look before (Y/N) spoke up, “Could we get the cheesecake and- “but she was cut off by his scoff, “What?”

“Do you really need the cheesecake?”

Jon felt a hot rage go up his spine as he glared daggers into Ramsey. (Y/N) went instantly red and was stumbling to even get a word out so Jon spoke up. “Give us one of each dessert,”

“You want four desserts?” Ramsey finally actually looked at Jon whose gaze could cut metal right now.

“Yup. Problem?”

“Whatevs. Coming right up,” Ramsey said as he sauntered off to the kitchen.

“Don’t listen to a word that guy says. He’s an asshole. I don’t understand why you ever dated him. And you said the dessert was good so we’re trying each one no arguments,”

(Y/N) smiled and Jon almost forgot the anger at the sight of it, “He was nice once. I think. Im honestly not so sure now,” she laughed but her voice was fragile.

Jon grabbed her hand without even thinking, “You deserve someone way better than him. You’re so,” Jon shook his head trying to think of the right word, “I don’t think I’ve ever met someone so perfect,”

“You barely even know me,”

Jon sighed as he debated if he should go against everything his friends had told him and lay himself out on the table, “I had my own Ramsey. And well, there’s a lot to that story but long story short she just. She was just not good for me. Now I don’t even know why we ever dated but she messed with my head, and I haven’t gone on a date since until now. And I can honestly say I’ve had more fun tonight than I did in the whole year I knew her,”

He expected her to run, to excuse herself to the bathroom and climb out a window, but she squeezed his hand instead, “I get that. I really do. I was thinking the same thing about Ramsey this whole time. How could I date someone as pig headed as him- “she said causing Jon to chuckle, “when I could’ve been with someone like you,”

“Maybe blind dates aren’t so bad after all,” Jon said, and she smiled. They stayed looking into each other’s eyes till Ramsey ruined it yet again by ungraciously dumping four plates and 2 spoons on the table.

 They didn’t let it ruin the mood and spent another hour sitting and chatting as Jon experienced the best cheesecake of his life. They must’ve been too happy for Ramsey's liking who decided to dump the bill on their table without even asking but made sure to add, “Remember it's rude not to leave a tip,”

“Its official. I have better taste than you,” Jon joked as he pulled out his wallet.

“Hey, I need to stalk this Ygritte girl before you get to judge,”

“Fine fine,” Jon said as he began to take cash out, “It was 38.50 but I only have $20s and I don’t wanna leave him $1.50,”

“Here I have change,” (Y/N) said as she pulled out $18.50 in cash, “You can pay me back by getting me a drink at The Wall on our next date,”

“Oh, can I? your so kind,” Jon said though internally he was bouncing off the walls at the idea of another date with this perfect specimen.

“I know,” she said as she scrunched her nose up and Jon thought he may die from her cuteness, “Do you have a pen though? I wanna leave him a ‘tip’,”

Jon passed her a pen and tried to watch what she was writing but she hid it and closed the bill holder with a grin, “We should go. Now,”

The pair rushed to the host stand for (Y/N) to say a quick goodbye to Baela. As she was telling Baela she’d text her they heard a “Hey!” from across the restaurant and the pair turned to see Ramsey pushing through tables to get to them.

“Go, go, go,” (Y/N) laughed as she grabbed Jon's arm and hauled him out of the restaurant, and ran across the road, narrowly dodging a car.

Ramsey flipped them off, unable to leave the restaurant but as soon as he walked back in the pair broke out into a laughing fit, “What did you write?”

(Y/N) laughed harder, “I told him how to find the clit,” she said, and Jon laughed even harder.

“Oh, my gods I love that,” He was almost crying at this point, “This is the best thing Sam has ever forced me to do,”

“Im glad,” she laughed as she looked up at Jon, “It’s getting late. My roommate said if I didn’t get back by 11, she was calling the cops,”

“Well, I don’t need to get arrested again,”

“Again?” she asked, and Jon laughed, “Am I dating a gang leader or something?”

“I’ll tell you as I walk you to your dorm?” Jon offered.

(Y/N) grinned and nodded as the pair began to walk back to campus, “At least you’re a gentleman gang man,”

Jon was disappointed as they reached the door to her dorm knowing he would have to wait to see her again, “So if you don’t do insta do you at least have a phone number?” (Y/N) asked as she leaned back against her front door.

“Gimme your phone I’ll put it in,” he said, and she complied.

“This better not be a fake number Jon Snow,” she teased as he handed the cell back to her.

Despite his anxiety at the beginning Jon felt his confidence grow with every joke and come back. He didn’t even think as he stepped closer, leaving only an inch between them, “Don’t worry its very real. I promise,”

“Good,” she grinned as she brought her hands to rest on his shoulders, “I had fun tonight,”

“Me too,” Jon said as he leaned in closer, placing his hand on her waist. “I really wanna kiss you right now,” he confessed as his lips ghosted hers.

She leaned in ever so slightly so that her lips brushed against his as she said, “Then do it,”

His lips fell onto hers and her arms pulled him in closer, so they were pressed against each other as their lips moulded together perfectly. Jon wanted it to last forever but as he grazed his teeth against her bottom lip she pulled back slightly, “If we don’t stop, I won’t be going into my room alone,”

“You’re lucky im a gentleman,” Jon said as he forced himself to pull back, letting her turn to unlock her door, “Another time?”

“I’m free tomorrow?” she offered.

Jon laughed but nodded, “Tomorrows great. Text me,”

“As soon as im through this door.” She said, “Goodnight Jon,”

“Goodnight,” he said as he stepped away and let her return to her dorm.

Jon was barely out the dorm's front door when he checked to see if she had indeed texted him. She had. A text from an unknown number saying, ‘Guess who?’. Jon laughed to himself as he texts her back before looking at the bombardment of texts his friends had sent him. But they could wait. He wasn’t gonna let Sam find out he was right ruining his night. Turns out blind dates aren’t always a bad idea.

[kimyoonmiauthor]

The whole Haitian Grill Hoaxes.

Warning: Talks about Haitian history of slavery briefly and of cooking animals.

Not my usual line of posts, but meh, I kinda want to so some solidarity, education and attempt at least to weave in some talk of anthropology and worldbuilding with it.

First off, Anthropologists are required to take as undergraduates Physical Anthropology. We have to be able to tell the difference between a carnivore, an herbivore and a omnivore. And also are taught things like how to tell the difference between human bones and animal bones. No lie, this was one of the most difficult classes I took and I spent for probably the first time in a long time studying my ass off. I usually don't study, but for this one I studied really hard. 'cause you have to memorize the names of bones and how they differ. (Cue me crying because I still remember frontal parietal and occipital and semi-have nightmares about this class. I still have mandible, but then semi panic about the names of all of the nose bones.)

This isn't what I thought I'd be using my degree for, but here we are.

Next, I 100% do not condone and 100% condemn everyone being AHs to Haitians who've had enough crap in their history, such as, but not limited to Columbus depopulating the Island of Taino (It's a word that starts with G), enslaving a bunch of Africans, and then people getting upset when they overthrew their slave owners. This is designed as a defense against the racist who accuse them of eating an animal rarely eaten in human history especially WITHOUT ANY FLAVOR. WTF. Only people who are from the Europe do that. Did you really get insulted by Tim Walz making fun of the white American Palate and then confirm he was correct? Yes, you did.

I'm pulling out my love of food anthro for this too. lol Did I almost write a book about it? Yes, yes I did. Also, I have graphic design knowledge to be able to tell things.

***

This is the image. Those are chickens, whole, not free of their internal organs.

Might be 3-4 chickens, but this is my best guess:

That's the anatomy break down.

Basically, the tail is not a rabbit tail. The tail is also not a cat tail. It matches a bird tail.

The legs are not rabbit legs—they are too long and there is a claw. There is a wing in the picture. Cats don't have the anatomy. They have longer tails and it wouldn't look that way.

For reference, the Sphinx Cat. (which is really expensive, BTW. They've been catnapped before.)

The red in the picture is glare from a window because the person is standing and as the video goes, if you focus on the glare you can see it is a white person taking the video—or at least very light skinned wearing a red t-shirt and dark pants. Might even be a Trump T-shirt, but I couldn't confirm it on repeated viewings. This means the window is pretty big. It's not a car. The way the person shifts within the video means they are likely in their own house. There is a level of comfort there. This was also likely taken with a phone because the resolution is terrible. The way the camera shifts as the person shifts their position, etc and the bad camerawork, suggests amateur with a phone. (Also didn't expect to use my graphic design knowledge for this)

Dude, just go outside your house to film.

The second reason this isn't from a car like some people suggest is there is a fence that goes along the back of the property where the beveling of the fence suggests it's to protect the current yard. This means the fence likely goes the entire perimeter of the yard which would mean it's not visible from the street. The majority of grills are set up to face the house, not the street, unless you're planning on selling it.

Sphinx is an all furless cat. This looks nothing like what is in the picture. Those are birds.

It was pointed out to me that it might be stewing chickens, i.e. after they've been retired from egg laying. The kind you make into something like Dak Komtang. This means the picture was 100% faked.

Now, why is it a badly faked image: Cultural Anthropology and food anthropology here.

In order to cook any animal in a BBQ setting, every culture I know of where you are physically using a grill: You would have to chop it up so it cooks evenly and if you don't do that, put it on a spit to cook it whole. It *is* possible to cook a whole chicken, however, one would have to have taken out the giblets, and then dressed and marinated it thoroughly so that the breasts are correctly tied, plus you would have to tie it up so that the wings are tied to the body: https://bluejeanchef.com/cooking-school/how-to-truss-a-chicken/

Truss it tight. This helps the chicken to cook evenly. Similarly with rabbit you'd have to empty the main cavity of the innards.

No one leaves the chicken feet on in that case. It's better to take off that part of the legs and do something else with them, like say Chinese Chicken feet for dim sum.

Nunzio pointed out that the chickens were likely stewing chickens, i.e. retired breeders.

based off of this picture. i.e. terrible for grilling on the barbecue because it's much tougher meat.

In addition, while there are cultures that do eat chicken heads, often to make the chicken cook more evenly, they are cut off of the body and grilled/cooked separately because the rate at which the head cooks is faster than the rest of the body. In the picture you can see the chicken combs.

The next point of clue that this is a faked image is that there is NO FUCKING FLAVOR ON THE CHICKEN.

White food travel shows, Haitians themselves when making their food, my own mouth is going to tell you, that is is packed to the gills with flavor. OMG, some of the food is so spicy, even this Asian feels like they were crying. C'mon now, that's a crime to say that Haiti people are going to cook anything on the grill with no flavor.

You know the only cuisine in the world that gets close to doing that? Europeans and people of that direct descent. And I've eaten my way through South America, Central America, North America, Texas BBQ, Louisiana, NE America, South West America, Italy, France, England, Germany, Poland, Russian, Hungarian, Iranian, Armenian, Tunisia, Nigeria, Ethiopian, Greek, Chinese (Northern and Southern, BTW), Japan, Korea, most of SE Asia, Philippines, and some of the South Pacific (Working on it). There is only one continent that does not flavor their meat before putting it on the grill—effing Europe. WTF.

The rest of the world is begging you to at least marinate your meat. !@#$ Even effing Texans are begging you to marinate your meat.

Anyway, no self respecting home chef or any type of cook would cook their meat this way.

Food experience

I've eaten and cooked whole rabbit, whole chicken, whole turkey, whole goose, venison (legally hunted and shot), beef, lamb, goat (not whole), and !@#$ there is no way someone is cooking it that way without any heat on the grill first. In order to grill anything, you need a lot of prep time to make it work, even for smoking. You need to heat up the grill.

Let me tell you as a kid when I first arrived to the US, my mom would serve up crap meals which consisted of mediocre rice, fish sticks, and carrot and celery sticks. God, I hated the cooking. And she kept saying how she would not ever put in more effort into our meals. Having some semblance of foundation about cooking, I watched cooking shows, read cook books, and managed to get the foundations of cooking from asking and doing.

This meant by the time I was a teenager I was making the majority of the meals for the house. In fact, my parents made me do the majority of the cooking some nights AND clean the dishes I cooked with sometimes because they were seriously assholes.

They also would have me heat the briquettes for the grill ALONE. --;; Unsupervised. Yeah, not recommended, and I would never ask kids to do it on their own. Don't do as my parents did.

On the list of things they had me cook was things like venison and goose. When I flunked out of college the first time due to lingering trauma, they also had me do all of the cooking for rent and made unreasonable demands on me.

Fuck. Go back to your fucking fish sticks.

The point is that I know the foundations of cooking meat very, very well. I got so good at it, I could sense the difference in smell to know when it was cooked versus not cooked.

I made up recipes too.

Anyway, there is NO way you would be cooking meat like that with the head still stuck on. For the cultures like Ireland that eats things like brains, the head is ALWAYS cooked separately from the body. The brain is squishy in there and can make the skull explode in some cases because it cooks at a different rate from the rest of the body. The same with the internal organs. Those are removed in every culture or taken out, rinsed and carefully placed back into the cavity of the animal to cook *with additional* things added (sometimes rocks, sometimes extra meats, etc.) Again, if you don't do that, the inside will explode. (And in some cases make things really bitter like gall bladder tastes nasty. You can see people eating the gall bladder on Youtube.)

This is why this is a faked picture.

In addition, the cultures that do eat things like cats are usually ravaged by imperialism, therefore, poverty. And I know how much imperializing nations like to make fun of other cultures they imperialized to the point of crippling their food supply and their inability to get new technology like refrigerators.

This is why I think it's best to not ridicule other culture's foods.

And don't believe hoaxes like this. Including the whole This is a dog without canine teeth video hoax. It's simply not worth it.

And I'd also beg you to fact check, fact check before you perpetuate rumors. But I suppose this is a lesson in racism and xenophobia too.

[amsgrey]

I judt found this draft/idea thing in my drafts from over two years ago (written before Little Sister Hugs) and i genuinely cracked up so much rereading it bc it would be really funny.

would anyone be interested in this?

Jay and hailey are busy with a case involving drug trafficking with military dudes or smth

you and will go out for dinner bc you get like n A+ in science or some shit and Will is all proud older brother

you get a call from Jay that the case is ramping up so he wont be home tonight and then ur like lit ill stay at wills i just gotta grab some stuff

you and will walk in and the house is like a mess and your like uh wtf

and will is like ok let me call jay or the cops or whatever

before he can he gets like smacked from behind like all those stupid movies

ur like o shit what the actual fuck

these big old dudes are in all black and holding like riffles bc intimidating and ur like :o

and ur standing in the kitchen so you do that really funny grab for the closest weapon and its like a pan that was waiting to dry or something entirely useless

theyre like yeah ok sure put it down u dimwit

u like stand over will being like feck off my brothers a cop

theyre like ha lol yeah we know we tryna find him where he at

ur like ha what i dont know? wouldn't have a clue

and theyre like ok then u come with us and ur like uh no sir

omg what if they chloroformed them that would be the funniest trope ever

jay is like workin the case being all undercover n shit and then he gets a call and its wills phone and hes like oh what did y/n do

will is like silent

jay is like yo whats up u alg

OR WHAT IF ITS LIKE WHAT THEY DID TO SAY WHERE THEY JUST SEND LIKE A SUPER FUCKING ANGSTY SHIT QUALITY VIDEO OF THEM LIKE BEATING WILL WHICH IS SUPER FUCKING NOT FUNNY BUT IS FUNNY TO IMAGINE THE UNO REVERSE FOR JAY

Jay immediately looses his mind and tries calling u like wheres will tf

obvi u dont answer and hes like this aint right

the team go to jays house and its all like torn apart but nothign like bad?

they call in the lab and the labs were like oh hey there's blood but they cleaned it? or smth

jay is spiralling and then they get anoter video of u? idk something else angsty

theyre like release our dude and give us back all the idk like guns and shit and voight is like ok well no way they let us do that

jay almost going cowboy cop

everyones like well this is great

you are like locked up by zipties bc criminals are stupid and you manage to like breakfree like a real mvp

u like find a gun or smth bc thats fun and free will

your all like well theres enough warehouses n creepy buildings in chicago for u to be anywhere so tf where we at

wills all leave me bc thats a funny trope and ur like shut the fuck up u dumbass

some military dude comes round the corner with his gun and sees u tryna walk with dead weight will and hes like? what are-

you shoot him bc badass bitch

he like fall down is all bloody and ur like o shit i just killed a man

will is like ya we gotta go ok like this shit serious fam

you walk around a corner and they all be sitting around in the big room and u and will are like oh hi guys

they all like point guns and ur like ah man we dead

but then!! intellegence is all out ur guns on the ground now! police things!

one of them like aims his gun but someone shoots his gUN bc i think thats the badassest thing ever and then he like has a bleeding hand and grabs u and knife to the throat thing bc trope central over here

no one has a clean shot so they all like omg dude let her go

do u get like seriously hurt? lowkey imagine like them dying and jay and will being like a mess ok thats way too dark but i like?

you either

die

get seriously maimed like idk loose a limb or smth idk

or ur unharmed and are like omg how am i not even bruised tf is this

depends on the level of angst idk

if anyone wants to ready this lmk i might actually write it

[casp1an-sea]

RANDOM THOUGHTS ON STAR WARS LEGENDS

These are just my opinions your welcome to have different ones

Han and Leia waiting to get married makes total sense! At the end of return of the Jedi the only time they’ve spent as a couple is when their relationship started in ESB and its continuation in ROJ most of which they were in battle. Yes Leia has been thinking about him for about a year now but she hasn’t been able to get closer to him in that time, and for Han it’s like not time has passed at all. Plus there’s still a fucking War going on that they very much are invoked in. Marriage is not on their minds, especially Leia’s. (Plus all the traumatic shit they have to process)

This is a message to both legends and canon LUKE IS GAY come on now 🥲

Mara was cool until she married Luke then the writers kind of screwed up her character

Han’s backstory WTF (it’s so sad but so good)

Can we get more Han and Lando buddy cop adventures?

I FUCKING LOVE CORAN HORN

Okay but those stormtroopers from Choices of One feel like The Bad Batch’s emo cousins

THRAWN IS SUCH A NEAT VILLIAN

I THINK NUSO ESVA IS NONBINARY. WHY? fanart

I think it’s rly funny that C-3PO gets given to Han

I love Anakin so much why did he have to die???? Also please Leia why did you insist on that name. Don’t get me wrong I love it but the pressure you put on this poor child. Han why’d you give in you idiot?

HAN IS SUCH A DAD

WHY ARE THEY LEAVING A DEPRESSED ALCOHOLIC HOME ALONE WITH C3PO AND A LIST OF BARS?????

I feel so bad for Han in courtship of Princess Leia. Should I?

Okay but let’s be clear Leia definitely cheated on Han with Isolder. Idc what she thinks that was, it was cheating.

I see a common theme of Leia being rly untrustworthy of Han until they get married. To like an unhealthy degree. What is this guys? I promise he’s not a bad dude.

remember that time where Luke made a submarine out of a dead creatures stomach skin? Yep I do.

lando’s mining facilities getting destroyed is such a funny gag

Did you notice Isolder’s daughter marries Han and Leia’s son? It’s like poetry it rhymes.

WHY IS BOBA FETT STILL HERE????

I love paradise snare but to me the hutt gambit was a dumbstruck fire

HUGE PET PEVE I HAVE WITH TATOINE GHOST! (Still love the book though) Forgiving and forgetting is not always the answer. Han does not need to forgive the republic. LEIA DOES NOT NEED TO FORGIVE VADER. Nor would Han push her to do so and he certainly would not condone the slaughter of tuskins because “he was a boy with a dead mother”. Well wouldn’t you know Han you’re a boy with a dead mother and you didn’t commit genocide. You have even less reason to forgive Vader than the twins. I block this out it was a bad writing choice.

HAN HAD A CHILD WITH BRIA???? I know when, but WHERE ARE THEY?! google was no help

“Must be nice to have a grandmother” LMAO HAN YOU OKAY BUDDY?

Is it bad of me to say I prefer the og force witches/dathomirians/dathomir/nightsisters to the canon ones?

WHY DOES FORCE LIGHTNIHNG NEVER ACTUALLY DO ANYTHING

LUUKE SKYWALKER? They’re so goated for that. OKAY BUT DID DAVE FILLONI READ THE REBEL FORCE SERIES? BRAINWASHED abducted children with no memory of their lives and family, solely devoted ASSASSINS to an ECCENTRIC IMPERIAL WITH A SUPERIORITY COMPLEX who wants favor with the emperor. And these assassins are called X-1, X-2, X-3, X-4, X-5, X-6, and X-7. This is why it should have been tech.

I thought Chewie’s death was impactful and I didn’t hate it

I like it better that Han and Leia didn’t divorce

I like that Han is a male wife and I love how close his children are to him. It makes sense that Leia would be the working one.

not them have a floor to ceiling length tapestry of Leia in a their house. That would scare the shit out of me at night.

I like that Leia is a senator and not a general. Okay hear me out. Leia is trained in diplomacy as much as she is in combat. She was a senator before she was a rebel. And she has always been very much involved in matters of state and would want to feel like she was actively doing something to keep the republic in check. The rebellion was not just a war to her it was making the Galaxy a better place that doesn’t end when the war for her so the natural next step would be a government position. Granted she still acts as a general if need be and goes far beyond her job description countless times.

THE NEW JEDI ORDER SERIES IS FUCKING CRAZY MAN

Can someone fo a demo of the song C-3Po wrote about Han?

[miimo96]

Thoughts on Re:Zero S3 episode 4

Oh so that's how we're starting this off, already with the Scuffed shit huh, also what do you mean we won't be able to handle them, they look LITERALLY like minions, Not final bosses

I've only seen this guy twice, and I already HATE his ass, Definitely becoming one of the worst fathers in anime history

I swear the more we see Satella the More I wanna know about her, like she is So intriguing to me, and her whole connection with Subaru is 1 of the greatest mysteries to me, because what is it with her and him, Why did she curse HIM of all people and basically make him I think into her archbishop, also why does she want him to kill her?🤔

Oh No. No no no no this cant be happening, Please don't tell me mimi's going to die, PLEASE! Poor Garf's already been through enough 😭😭

So lemme get this straight, you can't exactly move the Witches remains otherwise if you do the whole town will be destroyed, because the witches remains house a special power that could wind up destroying the entire city? Just WHO EXACTLY DID YOU KILL!?

IT'S TYPHON'S REMAINS!? as in the Witch of PRIDE? It's been a while so I can't exactly remember if that's her but if so, you're telling me you guys killed a KID!? 😨 What is wrong with y'all! Also why hasn't Subaru tried offing himself yet, if shit is this Bad, why hasn't he tried going back to fix everything since he knows he'd be expecting it, he seemed pretty eager to that last season when he found out Rem lost her memories, only for it to not work because his Save file got updated, but if his Save file hasn't gotten updated yet he could still do it

Oh my boy Garf going THROUGH IT, also SHE'S ALIVE!? HOW? no like seriously how with a wound like that, that Definitely looks fatal, unless you're Zoro I don't think anyone can survive that, anyway I'm glad she's alive tho 😔

Yo Garfield has to Lock in because this shit with him seeing her makes absolutely No sense, like he should be fighting with the intent to kill, not hesitat, like wtf is up with him, why does THIS bother him so much

NOOOOO! Even though we've already seen the aftermath, it still hits Hard like DAMN IT! Also I wanna throughly apologize for clowning those guys, I was unaware they were Like That...

Uh DUH! I'm not leaving her in his hands, that dude got me effed up if he thinks he's getting away with taking her, as soon as he's done with this little side Quest, He is going to DIE

Look at my boy Subaru getting the RESPECT he deserves ^^

also this little moment between him and Julius was so sweet, like even tho he's a Smug cocky bastard, he's still a pretty good guy, glad to see them finally getting along ^w^

A F*cking DRAGON!? Nah they wilding now

I don't think I've talked about it before, but Subaru actually doing shit is CRAZY, like the character development this season is insane, I have not seen him act like this before, Normally he usually just relies on others and plays support, but the fact that he's actually playing a part during the fight is crazy! The character development for this man ^^

Oh We caught your ass with a set up, now my boy's about to slide you like a baseball game, in simple terms: this is GG's

I've said it before and I'll say it again, Regerntion powers are scary as Hell when YOU'RE the one without them

OMFG! Do you know the amount of PAIN you would be in after landing on a Busted up leg, not only did he land on it, but the fact that he's also still STANDING is amazing, nah Subaru's an absolute G at this point

Hold up he wasn't wearing green before...(processing) What did you do to Otto you bastard? 😡

Hold up that wasn't his name before, also why is he saying "We" all of a sudden, wtf is going on, seriously 😕

Let's go Subaruuu!!! Time to avenge Rem bitch! ^^ Next episode's about to go crazy, and I'm totally here for it >_<

BONUS:

Who the eff starts a conversation like that, Buddy She JUST woke up

[do-i-look-like-a-doctor]

part 2 of this

anyways, that’s that. things are fine, people are talked down of their motives, life is going back to normal. THEN OBITO SHOWS UP and it’s nothing but emotional turmoil between Kakashi and that orange masked moron. don’t even get me started on why Obito is doing all this evil stuff in the first place.

wtf do you mean Orbit, that thirty year old, buff, scarred, dopey, traumatized, texas two-steppin man is trying to ruin the world because his crush got gut punched to death when they were both FOURTEEN?

like babe, there’s more important things to worry about besides Rin and killing Kakashi. how are you gonna get crushed by a rock as a teen and instead of staying dead like a normal person you get revived, patched up with tar by your shady uncle, and go on a vengeful rampage for like 15 years. don’t piss me off.

so now it’s Orbit vs. Cashew which is more of a mass emotional hysteria between those two frenemies if anything. then, it’s Fishroll, Pink Doctor, Sigh, Yams, and the entire village vs. The Bad Girls Club.

when Naruto fights these troglodytes you’d think it would be a typical battle of one wins one loses but OF COURSE ITS NOT ITS NEVER NORMAL CIRCUMSTANCE.

Naruto, the same kid who can control some of the most powerful ninjutsu, the dude who is besties with the fox demon in his mind, the orphan who had every right to become the villain, wins his fights not with bloodshed but by TALKING? no, don’t look at me. for practical reasons, i do not exist as this moment.

Naruto and company are all out there kicking ass and winning because why wouldn’t they. wanna know who’s not winning? Weasel because Sasuke found him and merked his blind self. yeah, Itachi let Sasuke kill him. wtf, who wrote that in? someone explain family therapy to these two before i call the police.

so when the Bad Girls Club are no longer a club aka hella hella dead or gone and that weird emotional thunderclap between Kakashi and Obito is done you’d think that’s a wrap. you’d think that’s it because everyone got what they wanted. well you’re wrong, sorry love.

because Naruto is STILL SNIFFING OUT SASUKE LIKE A BLOODHOUND WHOS ON THE PROWL.

i wanna point out that throughout the entire series Sasuke has made it clear he doesn’t want friends and Naruto basically said “well we’re married so to bad” and cuz of this whenever he did run into Sasuke it was always a fight. the constant back and forth between these two of betting on losing dogs, yin and yang, self-destruction, self-realization, and strength gain leads you to think Naruto will kill Sasuke because he couldn’t save Sasuke from himself.

that doesn’t happen, of course it doesn’t. that’s normal circumstance and we don’t do that here. have you been listening? don’t get me started fam I’ll punch walls.

Sasuke, the same dude who’s been against any form of emotional connection since day zero, suddenly faces the guy who’s been standing up for him despite all the destruction and death. what’s Sasuke do? admits he’s always lowkey cared for Naruto and the others. im leaving the function, i slipped on my own tears on the way out.

my Jonas brother in Christ, what? Sasuke, babe, get out of my house and be so serious.

i may not have a lot of muscle but i have unbridled female rage, a lot of questions, and a broken flat iron to help me find the god damn answers.

so yeah, he says “teehee oops”, helps rid of the remaining baddies, him and Naruto get matching missing limbs, and all is mostly forgiven.

what do you have left at the end of all this bullshit? traumatized kids who grow up, become something, get married, some have kids, and we never actually got the boyfriends we deserve. Sasuke is still trying to be Jesus of Suburbia, Naruto has a son who’s name sounds like Burrito.

i can not make this shit up, this series goes every direction yet also stays in a circle. if I showed any of the episodes to a victorian child or a modern day old person their heads would explode and it’d feel like chernobyl all over again.

what lessons did we learn by the end of the anime. one, don’t try to destroy the world when your crush dies in your teens. two, mind your business. three, seek family therapy before attempting murder. four, being gay is great and helping the homies is greater. and five, don’t get me started.

yall ever love an anime and/or show so much it becomes irritating? cuz i do.

anyways, it’s a great anime. good animation, relatable characters, amazing development of the world and people in it. i recommend it to everyone and yes it’s weird but we will ignore that. if you want weirder, watch One Piece.

thank you for coming to my yap session.

(again, unedited. sorry for mistakes, i might fix them later)

[wikiangela]

the boys 4x03 thoughts

so the Seven are just the four now lmao or I guess the six now but we'll see how long those two will last 🤣

Butcher working with JDM! 😍😍

firecracker needs to stfu 🙄

I love Sage's attitude and her dynamic with homelander, it's just so interesting

frenchie won't tell colin now is he 😫 that'd be too quick and and too easy, i bet this is eating at him like the guilt for mallory's grandkids smh wtf frenchie 😫

now firecracker's braindead followers are walking into starlight house jfc 😭

Frenchie likes colin sooo much and its clearly tearing him apart and its so sad 😭😭

oooh Victoria's gonna figure out Singer knows so quickly 🤣 and he wants to ban supes from every position but entertainment? lets see how homelander and vought likes that lol

btw Claudia Doumit is soooo gorgeous 😍😍😍

"I'm going to kill them all" she signed with the most adorable smile ever 🤣🤣🤣 she's the cutest, even when she's murderous lol

kimiko and frenchie are really the definition of ride or dies 💪❤️

flip A-Train? I like the idea but also he might flip back within a second so that's risky lol

Butcher contacting ryan through video games lol love it - also wow that game is violent

what does Noir's replacement not get about 'don't talk' jfc dude, watch anything with real Noir in it (they have plenty of movies) and study his behavior and do.not.talk. where did ashley find this guy jfc 🤣🤣

lmao Ashley got demoted from CEO to mascot, how sad 🤣

Butcher baked cookies and bought all those games aww - even if he dosed those cookies whatever lol

if anyone can concknve A-Train its MM fr, and if he does, i love it and cant wait to see where it goes - I just hope it actually sticks this time lol

high frenchie started so funny and now it's just so sad 😭😭

oooh who's the girl?? was she another one of the kids like kimiko??

"I wouldn't want me either" nooo why am i crying jfc, this poor kid 😭 homelander just showed up and screwed up his whole life 😭

Ryan just wants to be with Butcher but he thought what he said was genuine 😭😭😭

that conversation between Ryan and billy was sooo good 😭

Ashley, if you wanna live, better fucking run 😳

oh god the vought on ice shit is so cringe lol

I miss Maeve 😭

is Victoria really gonna team up with homelander 😬 i hope not but also it could be interesting 👀

omg i knew they wouldn't just kill hughie but got scared anyway lol

oh my god this turned into a massacre lol homelander was really determined to kill 😳

A-Train came through!!! if he's fr on our side, im so here for it!! 🤩

Kimiko is so worried 😭

okay, I feel bad for hughie's mom 🥺

JDM has just the best voice 🥵

Sage and Deep?? ummm... 🤢 that was weird. what's the thing on the table??

Homelander is loooosing it 😳 so scared for Ryan, if he really snapped, he'd kill him fr

go home??? Im soooo invested omg

[chaotic-mystery]

smut has 1000000% raise my bar way to damn high in the category of sex with men

story time:

went out on a tinder date with this dude and like the date itself was fine cant really complain he paid for my food (it was at a Mcdonald's but you know the struggle is real rn and food is food also what kind of fat bitch am I to turn down free food ya know? )

so like obvi been like ovulating for the past few days and I got cobwebs down there so I needed a little dusting. so we went back to his place and sealed the deal but Jesus Christ. it sucked BALLS. shit was blander then white people food. like I was looking for the seasoning and all I found was salt and pepper.

I told this fuck head to and I quote "tell me how pretty I look" cause I love it when someone tells me how pretty I look when I'm on their dick

to which then he proceeded with "yeah"

BITCH WTF? YEAH? ALL I GOT WAS A YEAH????

I was fucking McMad lemme tell you. He then came within 5 minutes. and was like "DiD YOu cuM?"

Yeah came to the wrong fucking house. so I went home and flicked the bean to some Joel Miller smut and had a glass of wine and here I am. Pissed off and still horny

-the anon who clearly needs to lower her standards or become a lesbian 💛

Oh honey if anything smut has opened your eyes for you! MEN SUCK! OKAY! in the wise words of my lover @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin … GET UP AND LEAVE IF THE DICK IS TRASH. NEVER FAKE IT FOR A MAN! (I paraphrased but it’s okay) don’t ever let him make you think you owe him anything even if he paid for dinner! Especially if he’s unwilling to make you feel good. FUCK HIM!

[iminyournotis]

I was thinking, "I don't even have any friends to be honest with, or tell my shit to, because everybody seems to have some kind of stake in my personal business," but then I remembered TUMBLR EXISTEDDD, so here I am.

1. Ended up snooping on my NINETEEN year old coworker last night because he skipped out on BK with me after work, and I got UNREASONABLY possessive, noticing that he was talking to the new girl at work, and I thought no WAY he's fucking her... She just started. (And he made a WHOOOLE thing to me abt how he doesn't want to hook up-- he just wants to find someone he loves and 'make love'. ((I was all, 'You're completely valid.' and then look at the camera like I'm in The Office then do the finger loop crazy sign at my head's temple, crossing my eyes. LOL.))) So I pulled back up after I finished getting BK alone because I was salty as hell and overly curious, and they were still there an hour and ten after close... I honestly scared them and embarrassed myself and I tore off.

2. Went to the gas station beforehand, because I had started smoking cigarettes again like a day or two ago, because I've been stressed about having Seb cock block his brother from me (and potentially for me. It's complicated.) and it lowkey feels like Caleb ALLLL over again, and it's making me lose my mind, so I'm back to stressedly chuffing.

Went to buy a pack, and this dude hollered in the gas station. I hollered back.

We were talking, I give him my phone number, I told him I'm willing to hook up, he's like 'alright, cool... Maybe pick me up later cause I need a whip,' I'm like, 'Okay.' Cue Burger King and checking where I shouldn't.

3. Go back to my parents' house and dude texts me asking if I was trying to link up... It's late, I tell him yeah anyway. I have work at 8:30, and it's already 11 or midnight by the time we're messaging each other. I end up pulling up to this bar I've never been to around midnight, and I end up taking him and his friend to get blazed out in a parking lot somewhere. Dude I was gonna hook up with doesn't smoke za, but his friend does. I get high and immediately get scared, because now I'm OVI, and I have two young Black men in my vehicle with me, and I get scared that some awful shit was fixing to happen, so I go, 'I'M GETTING YOU BOTH HOME SAFELY. I'm not pulling out until our seat belts are fastened, etc.' Went full mom mode. (Also, at this point, the young man I was with was 22, and his friend was 21. They thought I was younger than even them, which was hilarious. So another predatory woman moment for Mama.)

Drop 21 off. Go to drop 22 off next, but he takes me to this outfield out the way... We park, talk some; he hits it and as he's getting out of the backseat, I go, "Wait, did you finish?" He very non-chalantly said "Yeah," as he's putting his pants back on. I go, "... Did you cum inside me?" He responds pretty deadpan "Yeah." I'M LIKE "WHAT? Did you even plan on telling me???" He goes, "I mean, yeah." I was stunned. He's like, "I mean, you can take a Plan B if you don't feel safe." NFJSJFHJDN I was losing my mind. NOT the fucking point. He's like "Are you mad at me?" I'm like, "TO be honest, yeah."

I drive him back home, he forgets something in my car, I pull back around, he's tryna get me to stay at his mom's house with him for the night (which he pays rent at), I say no. I drive off. He goes, 'Actually, I forgot my hat, too.' I was like 10 minutes down the road and closer to home by the time I saw this message, so I'm like 'Man, I'm keeping it now. Sorry.' He's like, 'alright it's fine. lol.'

End scene. Oh, actually not, because by the time I get back into my city/town, it's like 3:30 AM. I didn't even wash my clothes, I still needed to shower, I haven't really been eating for the last week, so I thought, 'Fuck it. I'm calling off.'

Haven't called off a single time since starting, even through this lowkey nasty cold I had a few weeks ago. So my manager, who I'm WAY too involved with, was like 'wtf?? You're just not coming in?' I'm like yeah. She's like "What's your reason." All investigative. I'm like "Not been eating well. It's for my health." She goes, "Get well." I'm such a fucking loser.

So then I woke up like an hour ago at three PM, and here I am. ❤️ What the fuck is going on with my life, though.

[autistic-crypt1d]

X-Files Live Blogging

Season 4

Left off on a damn two parter!

S1, S2, S3

Updates:

- Herrenvolk

- wtfffff

- GET HIM MULDER

- he's not dead is he

- bro needs to stop fucking ditching Scully

- is cancer man gonna help Mulder in order to save his mom??

- how is he just gonna pick one and decide that's the one he's taking back??

- dude, could you not have just stuck your hand in there and rubbed it on yourself instead of dumping it all over you?!?!?!

- uh oh, you fucked up info guy

- another source down

- Home

- oh no, this is the episode I talked about when I started this watch through, the only episode of X-Files I'd ever seen and hateddddd

- Mulder wtf are you doing

- oh hell

- I'm not watching the rest of this, I'll read the wiki this is making me sick

- Teliko

- how did no one hear him scream

- been a while since we've seen Mulder eating sunflower seeds

- is this blonde woman gonna be the next source?

- how tf did he get in that wall and how tf did they get him out

- WOWZA THAT WAS FUCKING CREEPY

- Unruhe

- weirdddd

- Scully, you're really reaching rn XD

- oh hey it's that guy from The Mentalist!!

- he's going for Scully isn't he

- FUCK

- The Field Where I Died

- woah

- RIPS UP A HISTORICAL PHOTOGRAPH

- Sanguinarium

- mmm immediately uncomfy

- eew

- what the fuck

- I don't understand the motive here

- so she was trying to stop him? From doing what?

- sir, why are you levitating

- OH YUCK NO THANK YOU

- Musings of a Cigarette-Smoking Man

- oh? Cancer man lore?

- full disclosure I got halfway through the episode but was so distracted making Stargate memes I had to restart. Suddenly Kennedy was being assassinated and I had no idea how tf we got there

- Mulder's dad??

- hot damn Cancer man has LORE

- YOU'RE TELLING ME CANCER MAN ASSASSINATED JFK AND MLK?!?!

- why does he carry around a picture of Mulder as a baby and his mother? Did he steal it from Mulder's dad??

- wtf is he taking about "never killing anyone"???

- why did they save it's life just to kill it?

- why shoot it? Why not cut off life support?

- Tunguska

- wow what a professional. He's told the container contains biohazards and he fucking DROPS IT.

- Krycek?!?! How tf did he get out??

- PFFFT the way Mulder just yanks Krycek around is so funny

- OOP

- damn it she is the new informant. I don't want random sexual tension I want cloak and dagger damn it!!

- he should not be comfy with his informant!!

- I really hope the lab guy doesn't get hurt

- Krycek redemption arc?

- oh wtffff

- OH NO

- TWO PARTER

- Terma

- who tf are those people and why are they all missing an arm

- they cut off their arms to avoid the tests??? Would that even help??

- OH MY FUCKING GOD DUDE WHAT THE HELL

- Mulder?? Boy how tf did you get here!!

- wtf is happening

- Paper Hearts

- wtf

- Mulder looks way too good in that shirt

- she can't have been killed by that guy though right? Otherwise why would there have been clones of her at that farm?

- "wrong house you stupid son of a bitch!" PFFT

- ah hell

- El Mundo Gira

- did the sky just piss

- gross!

- why did only one of the goats die and where tf is the dude

- more gross!

- need some hazmat suits oml

- oh what the fuuuuuuck

- WHAT THE FUUUUUCK

- Leonard Betts

- x-ray vision or something?

- oh he dead

- not dead??

- BRUH

- FREAKYYYY

- :(

- WHAT THE FUCK

- Scully has cancer?!?!?!?!

- Never Again

- oh he's alive

- SHE'S GETTING A TATTOO???

- this is weirdly sexual and I do not like it

- wow way to be a dick Mulder

- I think some of my noted got deleted from the end of this episode and maybe the beginning of the next

- Memento Mori

- yeah, yell at your sick daughter, great move

- she told you when she was ready, it's her body, her life, lay off

- Skinner going to Cancer Man to keep Mulder safe from him and save Scully :(

- let's go conspiracy crew!

- wtfffff

- 😭

- her hands under his jacket AHHHH

- THE FOREHEAD KISS

- I'm kinda confused, is she just gonna not get treatment and hope for the best? Was it just that doctor's treatment that was hurting the women or all treatment? I'm confused

- Kaddish

- fuck that shop guy omfg

- :(

- this is so sad 😭

- Unrequited

- invisible assassin?

- :(

- Tempus Fugit

- plastic gun???

- woah wtf

- plane abduction?

- they're so cuuuuute

- Fornell?!?!?!

- I thought Max was the dude who got abducted in like Season 1 in that warehouse

- so the military was trying to shoot down a UFO and the plane was collateral damage?

- OH?

- bro the camera work and lighting in this scene is unbearable I can't see shit!

- IN THE DARK MULDER????

- PENDRELL NO

- HATE IT HATE IT HATE IT

- Max

- Pendrell no 😭

- it is the same Max! Why don't I remember him coming back?

- oh hell

- OH HELL

- I'm really sad about Pendrell :(

- Synchrony

- oh shit

- oh??

- noooo he was so nice :(

- so this guy is a time traveler then?

- please live!!

- HELL YEAH

- oh what the hell

- WHAT THE HELL

- this is super cool

- I wonder why he wants to stop it

- WHAT DOES HER IDEA LEAD TOOOOO

- this shit is intense!!!

- GOD DAMN

- GIRL HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING

- Small Potatoes

- another one????

- CARSON!!!

- nice dive Mulder XD

- rape tw

- ooooh that's not really him

- uh oh

- oh god he's gonna make a move on Scully isn't he

- no this would be so cute if it was really him 😭

- OH MY FUCKING GOD THAT IS THE ABSOLUTE BEST WAY THAT COULD'VE GONE

- NOW BOTH OF THEM KNOW THAT SHE WAS TOTALLY GONNA LET HIM KISS HER

- Zero Sum

- Bees?!?!?!?

- oblivious much?

- Skinner why tf are you covering up that death?

- Skinner what are you doingggg

- of course it's cancer man's fault

- Elegy

- funky

- ouch ouch ouch her therapy session

- wtfff

- Demons

- lore??

- Kawalsky?!?!? Wasn't he in the show before??

- I'm so intriguedddd

- IS HE CANCER MAN'S SON?!?!?!

- Gethsemane

- HUH?!??!

- she keeps expecting her dad to walk in doesn't she :(

- he looks so much like Jack O'Neill in that outfit

- GET HIM SCULLY

- god her angry is WOW

- ow ow ow he's crying 😭

- HUH?!??!?!!

Season 5

[jalebi-weds-bluetooth]

Hi Jalebi! How are you? I hope you’re doing well, I just saw your IPK edit on Instagram for its 13th anniversary and it’s so so good, really amazing.

My question is regarding consummation episode, like I have no doubt in my mind about whether they consummated or not but what really confuses me is the scene that’s followed by later on. Usually in any after consummation scene we see couple in the bed together cuddling but here Arnav and Khushi were in different places. And considering the fact that Khushi remembered all of it and then Arnav and Khushi also talked about it proves that it wasn’t their dream or imagination.

Then why they were shown in separate place? Is it because Arnav drove back home and dropped Khushi at Laxminagar so that their families don’t find out?

Hello Anon!

I'm doing well and thank you so much for loving my edit <3 (It's on instagram) I SPENT WAY TOO MUCH TIME DOING IT :")

Lol you answered your question by yourself but this is my fav scene so here's a lengthy answer.

Ok, this is where our minds fill in. Cause even though TV shows things in far more detail than films do, sometimes they leave a gap where we can draw enough conclusion.

Off screen note: While I would've loved a post sex scene (which is also common in ITV), I do think they didn't have Barun for much time cause it was his birthday (I crack up every time I remember dude shot a consummation sequence for his birthday, lol insert Sanaya Nakuul laughing their heads off at this trivia), which means that apart from the vital consummation sequence, the rest of the episodes where filled with other characters and things they had to do. Which plot wise, imo, doesn't affect anything at all, it was cute seeing what the fam was upto.

I do think a few of us were like did it happen or not (pat on our backs for going yeah man let them make out pre marriage), but also there was a weird lot who was obsessed with thinking they are married so sex is ok or no they didn't have sex cause weren't married properly yet.

But yes, generally TV will have a sequence and I personally love after sex sequences cause it's just so warm and full of fuzzy feels.

Off screen note: Also, wtf was the editor thinking cutting out the shot where Arnav removes Khushi's waist chain? Sigh, that's sooo rude of them to cut.

But coming back to point before this gets too long, what happened was that Arnav-Khushi had great sex, and Arnav quietly dropped Khushi off to her home. He probably waited until she fell asleep and he sneaked out back because, lol, they are getting married in a few hours and the whole house would be up and it would be strange finding the groom in the bride's bed.

Lol.

NK would have a field day though.

So then we see that Khushi wakes up calling for Arnav, remembers she is back at home, thinks more about having had great first time sex and has an adorable moment of OMG I AM GETTING MARRIED TODAY.

Also, they do have the classic 'post sex talk' later in the day. Like the show does a fab job of showing that everything is going in a rush! Like everything is being done asap - and literally the only time Arnav and Khushi do get to chat is legit when they're dressing up.

They barely have the privacy to have a detailed conversation (I love that they TALK when it comes to sex) nor the time so it's just a sweet succinct conversation.

And it's probably my favorite scene in the show cause confident/mature Khushi and sensitive/vulnerable Arnav is my favorite combination.

Arnav's hesitation shows that honestly post sex they really didn't have time so they probably had to race home! Which is why he didn't get to aftercare much, didn't get to ask her how she's feeling. Perhaps he wanted to say more, reassure more. He knows what sex means to her - if just in case she felt pressured or had regrets or even the basic fact it was her first time, if she's feeling ok.

He corrects his question that if she's feeling ok after last night.

And that's what Khushi answers. She hears what he wants to say and not only says that she's fine but that she enjoyed it, literally enjoyed every minute of it and she can't wait to see him.

And Arnav lets out a sigh of relief.

It's one of my favorite scenes in the show. You know the ones which seal that the couple gets a happily ever after? This one.

Best,

Jalebi

P.S: Yes I love this scene. It gives me butterflies till date.