#like theyre familiar and nostalgic and its like

[angryborzois]

why do old favs feel like old friends

[babieken]

do u ever go down a rabbit hole trying to figure out who this blog u interacted with five years ago is? bc i just did lsijdflsdjf

[the-record]

SKINNY DIPPING

SUMMARY: ellie, your perfect high school girlfriend, is back in town after college. what’s one date?

PAIRING: modern!ellie williams x reader

WARNINGS: n/a

A/N: i had an idea!!! pls enjoy while i finish the other 3 ellie fics lol

‘ WE’VE BEEN SWIMMIN’ ON THE EDGE OF A CLIFF ’

“oat milk latte for ellie.” your head shoots up hearing the order called off. it couldn’t possibly be her.

your staring at her when she turns around and makes eye contact. a smile forms on her face and she makes her way over to the table you’re at. “hey.”

“hi.” she points at the seat, you nod and she sits down. her eyes flicker away to not fall, but she brings them back to yours instantly. “how are you?”

“good.” she clears her throat, a comfortable smile on her face. “how are you? how’s your family?”

you roll your eyes and let yourself get comfortable. “theyre fine. my mom asked about you the other day.”

she leans back into her chair, one hand on her cup and the other on her thigh. “she did always love me more.” ellie teases. you kick her shin lightly and she hisses in pain.

your jaw drops. “oh stop, that did not hurt!” you watch the pout form on her face and kick her again, a little harder. you hear her whisper something as she grabs her leg. “that, maybe.” she gently kicks you back in retaliation. “so, what are you doing back here?”

she sips her latte before answering. “well i finished school, figured id see who wanted to hire me here before i went looking elsewhere.” you nod as she talks, taking all of her in. your ellie. “what about you? what’s like been like without me?” you know shes teasing but something inside you missed her.

“sunshine, smiles, and rainbows!” you close your laptop and give her your whole attention. “it’s been okay here, weird not seeing you and dina everyday.” she nods in agreement. “i’ve got an internship now, and a job, but not a career yet.”

talking with ellie is easy, it always has been. if she hadn’t gone away for college you might still be together. you take the time to learn everything new. you study the new freckles and a scar on her cheek. her voice is something you could listen to for years and never bore of.

“this was really nice.” ellie says as you pack your bag and she finishes her drink. “is there a chance we could do it again? maybe over dinner?” she leans forward on the table as she asks. “at miller’s?” the name of the restaurant makes you sigh.

you shake your head with a smile. “i dont know, sounds a bit… nostalgic, doesn’t it?” she shrugs and plays with the fingers on one of your hands.

“maybe. but lets do it anyways. it’ll be fun.” those green eyes would be the death of you.

the conversation at dinner came easy, ellie guiding you. it was nice to be back with her, in your own world in the quiet restaurant.

“have you dated anyone?” ellie asks, not exactly wanting to know.

you scoff as you take a sip from your glass. “not really. a couple flings but, nothing serious.” you say as you set down the glass. “you? im sure there were plenty of girls for you in santa barbara.”

“i dated a girl for awhile.” she smiles as you tense up and avoid her face. “broke up with her though.”

you hum. “and why’s that.”

“because she wasn’t you.”

you let out a breath you didnt know you were holding as a smile fights its way on your face. “ellie…” she takes your hand.

“let’s get out of here.” her eyes stare into your soul, convincing you silently.

the smile breaks free and you nod. “okay.”

you pay more attention to ellie than the roads as she drives. studying her profile, the lips you’d missed these past for years.

“take a picture, it’ll last longer.” your cheeks burn as ellie glances at you but you dont dare look away. its a few more moments before she slows and parks.

you glance around as you unbuckle and notice a familiar house. “dina’s place? weird place for a date.” she rolls her eyes and jumps out, running to get your door. “still quite a gentleman i see.”

“only for you babe.” she takes for you and leads you towards the house, but turns to the backyard rather than the door. you go to protest but she beats you to it. “don’t. just trust me.” she pulls you through the tall gate and into the backyard.

“i was gonna propose the beach, but then i remembered we are in jackson.” she smiled and pulled her top off.

you laugh. “ellie, what the hell are we doing here?”

ellie looks at you like it’s obvious. “we’re here to swim babe, duh?” shes stripping out of her pants now and you grab her arms to stop her.

“you have to be joking!” but she just shakes her head and jumps in, only her bra and underwear on. “i’m not getting in.”

she swims to the edge and reaches for your hands, which you mistakenly give her. “guess i’ll have to pull you in.”

you yell for her to wait but she’s already going, pushing back from the wall and pulling you with her. you pull her close as you come up to the surface.

“ellie!” she laughs and holds you in her arms. “i hate you.”

she shakes her head. “no you don’t.”

“no, i don’t.” its quiet, only the sounds of the water as you stand with her. “kiss me.”

who’s she to say no to that?

“ellie? is that you? angel? what the fuck!”

‘ I’M RESISTANT BUT GOING DOWN WITH THE SHIP ’

[byrdtrollsunoreversearchive]

💭💭💭

@astrumocs Is a long time friend and very dear to me. I'm so excited that we're writing more together and obsesseddddd with tavi and hikaru for sure <3. They're one of my friends who I feel has a very distinct voice in all their writing, like you can read one paragraph and sort of tell it's them through the style he uses. If that makes sense. I really admire that about him. They're also such a capable artist and you can tell how much time and effort they put into every individual piece. The spritesets he's been putting out lately just sort of blow my mind with the rendering. His style feels just as distinct and recognizable as his writing is, it just oozes with personality in every way. And outside of art they are just a very loving and wonderful friend. Who has been there for me throughout a lot of hard times. Making me laugh and saying things that are so kind. I love them a whole lot.

@quiescent-trolls is another long time friend. Their passion for my characters constantly drives me to create. They're such an important part of this community and such a talented artist and writer. I'm obsessed with what they did with fucked up but also their arc with nesmos <3 I really love how they write relationships. I think we have very similar tastes in terms of charactor angst and conflict. Every so often you just meet someone who clicks with you. When/if we write together, it is so over for all of you. Their art is also amazing and I've been blown away by it every single time I see it and I feel so lucky to be able to collab with them! Besides that they are a great friend and just a very considerate, mature and intelligent person. We've had a lot of conversations on kink and sexuality and all manner of things that are so important to me. I think its so nice to have people to talk too about this kind of thing.

@dirgelwch I don't even know where to start with lin, I could be here for hours. They constantly inspire me with their art and how they play around with the medium of storytelling. I remember being blown away by all the stuff they did with their narrator storyline and I still am. They're a very talented writer and I love Melina with my whole heart and am so excited anytime theres a drabble for her. Their physical art is also so impressive. Their work feels almost so, era specific, with the rendering and effects and noise they add to it, everything feels so nostalgic and familiar and emotional. I'm constantly impressed by their lineart, they have a really professional and characteristic way of using line that I just really admire. They're also such a capable character designer, and have so many trolls with such distinct sillouttes and color palettes. Other than that, outside of rp they are just a very wonderful, kind person who has always been willing to lend an ear to me. Theyre so funny and I love terrorizing our friends with silly nsfw breaking bad and lorax nonsense with them.

[darkgaia2]

like like like i want to pick apart their minds its so crazy... a relationship founded on being the worlds most lonely people that like. the only thing they both really felt was more like infatuation for one another.... maybe freom felt smth more but they were both just more in love with just. the idea of the other. and how so.. nostalgic clarity really is. she keeps her first form. she keeps the ai copy of freom around. clings to him still. but she keeps the freom she can still sort of control and manipulate and its kind of all she really Knows. its all she knows how to do. could she have been different if she was really shown another way? and all freom had known was just.. that manipulation. he wanted a friend and any sort of bond with anyone so bad. he wanted a family. so desperately. which isnt something clarity is really all that familiar with. idk where im going with this!! ive just been thinking really hard abt them and i clutch my head and good god not to talk abt fark with them too but thats so SO insane to think abt how much he exhibits his parents traits like fuck. what kind of path would he have gone down if he wasnt shown love and finding meaning in the world. would he have been like clarity? just... all he knows is how to control people. admirable motivations but.. fully wants to be in control. and like his papa all hes ever wanted was to be loved and he would crave having a family. and he has one but theyre all dead and gone and how much do you think he mourns this. like jesus christ. i fucking hateee this game

[oneshortlove]

Just a tiny ramble

One of my older sisters came over to help with the lawn, I saw her recently but its always a special feeling when one of my siblings comes to visit. Talking while the TV plays, door open with the screen door cracked open a bit, despite different homes and area, it feels so nostalgic.

It feels like childhood, Saturdays spent relaxing after a long school week. It feels so warm but with a cool wind, does that make sense? I hope so.

Its slightly different of course, new home, some missing people, and definitely a smaller dog lol.

As does most people, nice and familiar situations drastically changes my mood and emotions. I feel so lovely, like I have all this energy and I could talk to whoever I want, go wherever I want, do whatever I want. Sudden motivation to be active and outgoing. It feels amazing.

Does it make me dizzy going from bored and unmotivated to active and happy? Absolutely! I can guarantee my energy is going to almost evaporate later tonight, maybe take my mood down with it hone

Spending time with the people who made my childhood as...special as it was, to put it lightly, is the best time and feeling ever.

Everyone has their own lives and how they want to spend their time(theyre also quite older than me soo) and to be apart of it sometimes? Makes life so enjoyable, makes it worth it, makes it as beautiful as it should be.

This is so emotional, wow I hadn't meant this to be as such. But ya know, filled with confidence(would it be overconfidence? Maybe) my love just kinda..bursts! Have to get it out somehow, and just a simple "Hey, I love you!" post doesn't help much sometimes.

But anyways! Love you, talk to someone you love dearly today, trust me, sometimes that's all you need to give you a boost. Not all the time, but it definitely helps! Also, think more about the good moments rather than any of the bad or the embarrassing ones. Why waste them when they were the best ones?

[happi-meals]

Pancake Breakfast! 🥞

Pancakes are part of a traditional southern breakfast and I was craving them today.

Theyre sweet and nostalgic, reminding me of grandma's house the most and some breakfasts spent at Cracker Barrel with her when I was little.

One part of learning to cook is the magic that is finding out how my favorite foods dont take magic to make! As in, most of what pertains a meal or even an entré is so simple its suprising to me.

Pancakes, to be a bit reductive here, are just fried batter patties! The most simple consisting of what I made this morning (or rather afternoon lol): flour, oil, water, sugar, and leavening agents.

Here I experimented with my own batter making skills with a vegan twist:

all purpose wheat flour

water

olive oil

salt

brown sugar

honey.

I dont have baking powder but since I understand its purpose in a recipe as a leavening agent, I tried to substitute it with baking soda and apple cider vinegar, which kindaaaa worked? Lol I was gonna use lemon for the acid part, but I didnt want a bright citrus taste for these pancakes. Too experimental and not familiar lol.

With a little reassurance from a skim of internet recipies, what I made turned out not bad! And I was soooo excited when I saw the batter frying and then flipped the cake. Looked just like the Real Thing mama's make!

I wanted to get a lil experimental and add some trail mix inside. I added them a lil too late for my first pancake (sprinkled some ontop of the raw side of the cake i had frying in the pan yikes), so the texture was a bit grainy. Plus the nuts and fruit burned and the cake on that side didnt look as appetizing lol. But since that was my experimental cake, and was also my first try, I gave myself some grace and focused on the overall experience of eating the entire pancake. And all my efforts proved worth it! It wasnt half bad. :-)

I just cant imagine eating pancakes without having two, and I also had wayyy too much leftover batter for just one anyway, so I made another and added the trail mix into the batter bowl before pouring it all in, which proved to be a better choice lol. Since I didnt want to waste all the batter I made, and only intended to make one more pancake, i added it all to the pan for a huge one lol.

It turned out very good, though I do admit I might have to actually buy baking powder for more fluffiness (though the baking soda and acid/cider trick kinda worked! i'll just have to get my proportions down). Also I always over estimate how much oil i need in any given recipie! So it was a bit dense and greasy. But as with all learning experiences, mistakes are inevitable yet valuable!

The rest of my breakfast consisted of a fried egg, baby carrots, a banana, and steamed spinach. Brwakfast wouldnt have sufficed without vegetable elements for me, so I was literally craving vegetable sides rather than just a breakfast of wheat and animal products.

The carrots had a great texture and sweetness, and althought I definitely could have salted the spinachand a egg wayyyy less, the flavors together were supurb. One day I'll have to experiment with making omlets with spinach and vegan cheez bc the flavors are so compatible! 😋

LeEgg frying in LePan. I broke it up a little oops lol.

I found this recipe online of how to improve my vegan pancake making skills for another hearty breakfast. This one also calls for baking powder but i think my baking soda and acid workaround could still work.

I'll def update this post when I try this particular recipe!

[oetscop]

anyway uhhhh im struggling to focus bc my neck hurts like fuck so im gonna talk abt max and dizzy. and like elaborate on the whole "theyre the same person" thing

so max is my truesona right? his name (maxamillion) actually has a personal meaning to me. my whole life ive fought with identity and ive always had this sort of scattered sense of self. a lot of that comes from childhood neglect and housing instability growing up. every time i move or something bad happens i feel like i get splintered off into another jagged piece of myself, and as life goes on the older pieces get eroded away until i cant even remember who that person was.

i dont want it to sound like DID or something, because its not. its very different. these "other people" never exist at the same time as one another or anything like that. sometimes i can kinda call back how i was at those times in a nostalgic imitation sort of way, but like. its still me? i guess? i dont know.

maxxy is kinda based off the sort of shameless open bleeding wound of a person i was at one time. i was loud and wasnt embarrassed by it. i was open with what i enjoyed. i was clingy but oblivious and sometimes unrealistic.

dizzy is sort of like the more "rational" side of myself. he thinks hes smarter than max because he's been hurt more. hes more familiar with rejection sensitive dysphoria and has been through the same sort of really bad relationship and amicable breakup i went through, as well as the fallout that caused my entire friend group to splinter. hes apprehensive and distant and refuses to trust anyone to an unreasonable degree, hence the quotations.

hes perpetually trying to knock max down a peg or snuff him out. he reminds him how annoying he is when hes loud, he constantly tells him that expressing any emotion about a situation is manipulative. a lot of his character comes from the song hope by roar (among others) and specifically the line "if your hearts upon your sleeve, amputate the arm." hes very motivated by revenge.

really he comes from a well intentioned place, but hes also aware that hes being harmful. he thinks its for the best.

and in his defense max isnt a good person either, not entirely. hes terrified of losing people, but instead of growing distant to avoid pain like dizzy, he becomes incredibly clingy. constantly disarming himself and asking what he would have to do to keep someone around. he has no sense of self and is willing to just drop everything for someone. even if they hurt him. hes also insecure and somehow also full of himself.

but like, they are also literally the same person. the same dog, i guess. but they can interact physically with each other. dizzy looks exactly like max, just with mirrored fur patterns and is more desaturated in color. his hair is also like....greasier. and matted. max has really soft hair but dizzy spends most of his time in bed or just at home so he doesnt take care of himself. sometimes max can convince him to let him brush it. they have a very codependent relationship with eachother. well, okay that makes it sound romantic. its more like a symbiosis sort of thing. parasitic perhaps. theyll kill eachother together but theyll die if theyre apart.

it actually started with like..giving max an A/B/NLM sorta thing (since i do that a lot actually! give ocs traits from a specific media i like a lot. one of my other sonas shrinks when hes upset like cassie from dragon tales) but it sorta just became what it is now. idk why?? i still sometimes draw max with a flower on his head tho lol. its hard not to involve that when hes my truesona and care and paul r like........the focal points of my entire identity and sense of self rn lol. but theyre also nothing like max so i scrapped that.

idk this makes liek no sense lololol. theres far more "versions" that i might flesh out in the future? but for now its just the two of em. hooty hoo

[neurogenesisgirl]

i have been thinking. i tell (text) my best friend, "if i ever do have kids, i think i might rather adopt. i dont want them to suffer from all this chronic illness shit, because i know what thats like."

he answers. "me too" after a second, he follows with: "anger issues are hereditary. my mom, grandma, and me have it; i wouldnt want my kids to have that, because as you said, i know what thats like."

my throat betrays me. i only sit in silence, while he keeps talking about it. i know mental illness is just as bad as physical illness, and even invisibilized, but i cant help but feel... invalidated.

i mean i do not want my kids to inherit all of these health risks, of which ive acquired a copious amount. i mean i do not want my kids to stare at the ceiling at night wondering, "why me? why am i not like the other kids?" i dont want them to be buried in the heavy dirt of endless pain, pain that they'll have to clench their teeth through because thats what society has told them to do. pain that'll never end, because of pointless diagnosis — that burden them more than help them — screaming to them how they will not get out of this, at 9 years old.

i do not want my kids, if i ever have them, to lay awake at night crying, because theyre a "waste of money", because theyre not getting better and theyre not "even trying to", when a familiar incredibly shames them for accepting one candy on a party, at 10 years old.

i dont want them to be put on one hundred pills that specifically KIDS SHOULD NOT BE TAKING, and being gaslighted on side effect statistics; saying it wont affect you. then it does. then they secretly stop taking them, and when their mom finds out, they get a experience they'll never forget. at 11 years old.

i dont want them to face "grown-up talks" about their future, their health, their responsibility on themselves, the way they could even be bounded to rot in a bed if they dont make a change now... at 12. expecting a kid to mature, at twelve. then being yelled at when they start to sob, or try to say how they feel about it.

i do NOT want for them to feel familiar or comfortability on the white silence of a clinic or hospital, i dont want them to feel nostalgic because of that, because they should feel nostalgic because of a mcdonalds playground, not a place where people die, at 13.

the pain, the wheels, wheels of a machine that only exists to perhaps make you suffer more, the endless comparisons with people who have it worse. injections, blackouts, bullying. starting to comprehend all that at 14. knowing its wrong, that a child shouldnt have been exposed to it from a young age, but they cant tell anyone nor say, because they would be hit, hit with a whip of censoring; silencing. by their own parents.

among an ocean of so many things more, i find myself now. 15? when did all that go?

i lost my childhood due to physical illness.

my friend makes a joke, pulling me out of my trance. "we're like ying and yang, dude." he instantly follows with "you deal with physical illness, and i deal with mental illness."

that feels like a sharp stab in the side of my gut.

that makes me realize, isnt this what he has gone through, too? just in his own version. but he has suffered oh so similar things, and he has trusted me to know about it. something he barely does with people.

i laugh. maybe not because i got cheered up, but because i want to hide my internal process going on.

i realized why it felt invalidating.

people can never relate to the honest words of my soul. they always have to change them to their experience, to be able to try and understand. even if — by the book — thats a good way to make people feel less lonely, it makes me feel more lonely.

will i ever meet someone who will understand the deep cries of my insides? someone who will not have to twist its words, anyone with the same perceptive of what ive gone through? not understanding, but comprehending me.

no, i probably wouldnt. because that includes the tiring and vulnerating protocol of opening someones chest with your bare hands, tearing everything on the way, but being careful with each layer; placing them on a desk, to finally hold the darkness of their soul. no one is willing to do that.

im fundamentally different. i have never met someone like me.

even so, i dont blame my friend. we are just teens trying to survive the world.

maybe hes the closest i'll ever get to someone like me.

31 de marzo de 2023

— neurogenesisgirl

[vampirecatsw]

(this is my main reblog account)

WAAA I LOVE THIS SO MUCH!!! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS AJDHHJFKF 😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️

The first one... I love parallel scenes!! Shinichi is just looking 👁 like hmmmm this is too familiar and Kaito is sweating HAHAHAH. Waaa they look so cute and I love their expressions. THE GOAT SCENE, THATS MY FAV SCENE OF ALL TIMEEE

You really nailed the calm and fun vibes of the scene too! Like idk how you did it but you captured the vibes of Lost Ship in the Sky soooo well. Its so nostalgic for me even... *Wipes a tear*

*points* ITS THE DETECTIVE BOYS IN THE BACKGROUND. I love them so much,,, and the lil chickens heheh

The second one??? You really didn't have to go that far and I'm so grateful. Im giggling kicking my feet here, really

THEYRE SO CUTEEEE ❤️❤️❤️. Oh Shin, who wouldn't be charmed by Kaito's wonderful smile (no I'm actually blushing like Shin, how are you nailing Kaito's smile and Shin's "Oh No he's TOO Pretty" look so perfectly-)

THE BRIDAL CARRY IN THE NIGHT SKY WITH THE STARS

WAAAAA *Hugs OP*

I wish you a wonderful holidays! Thanks so much for your hard work, I love this gift(s) so much!!

Hey, @cyndraws !!! I really really loved your first prompt where I could redraw the official screenshot! So I did that, took a scene from the movie "The Lost Ship in the Sky", and mixed it with some secret identity shenanigans xD

I had some text on it at first but figured, anyone should interpret this scene however they want ;D

The second Prompt was more of a struggle but they look cute!

Thank you @dcmkkaishinevents again for making this event happen!:D I had so much fun!

[chariskneverdies]

In my Au i like to think how supportive Frisk is of Chara once they get their body back.

Chara feels so weird about mostly everything; to be in control overall. Its both nostalgic and kinda scary the first times they glance at the mirror to look at themselves, specially since they have grown.

Frisk finds Chara spacing out hard or blatantly dissociating just looking at their own hands, only for Frisk to grab one lovingly, grounding them, finding a familiar smile in their face as to say "youre here, im here".

Of course they are very uncomftable with physical touch at first, but Chara is, at the same time and mostly unconsciously, always touching Frisk in some way for reassurance. Frisk knows this and lets them keep a hand on their shoulder, grab their arm, resting their head in their chest..

Frisk is also a bit weirded out about being the only voice in their head, sometimes they still ask Chara something mentaly only for them to go "ah right, theyre out now" and look for them. They often joke to Chara about how they now look dumber without Chara's knowledge at hand, and how now they actually need to learn to read monster runes by themselves.

Frisk also gets more talkative in general, since they now have to actually speak for Chara to know what they think; inadvertedley saying any and all thoughs they have once they get a minute alone.

[goalofthecentury]

directors notebook on these because i promised one in the tags of the original post and never did one lol my bad. anyway

ok so to be honest i don’t know where these came from. like i knew i wanted to create something for creations sake and tbh i originally had a few sketches of alamein that i was gonna put in front of some slightly surreal backgrounds but idk. i felt like i could twist it further than that. like my first idea was a sketch-turned-portrait of alamein on the phone drawn against & incorporated into a background that made him look as if he was underwater (which is where the first one came from), but it ended up not really making sense in my head? i still like the idea & might end up using it one day but it wasnt what i wanted

anyway. on to the actual DRAWINGS. they’re both essentially a more surreal way of presenting boy’s ideas about alamein - he’s a deep sea treasure diver as seen from the depths and lit by a sun even further away than usual, and he’s the captain of the rugby team winning trophies and accepting regional honours on tv. i wanted to create a sense of surrealism, more specifically a sense of childlike wonder & nostalgic haze; they’re not just what boy wants to imagine, they’re the pictures he sees when his mind wanders, the way his brain has collaged so many aspects of what he knows (and doesnt know) about alamein with things from the rest of his life. of course, it has to be said that in the film boy’s initial ideas of alamein (outlandish) are contrasted with how theyre presented during that opening monologue (normal), but we can imagine the reverse (in which boy’s fantasies get more and more down to earth as his perception of alamein changes, until they’re barely even fantasies at all). this might be crossing into the ‘classic nz cinema’ territory that taika has talked about avoiding & might not make much narrative sense but hey. it doesnt have to ! it’s my art and i make the rules

something both drawings have in common (something that is more subtle in the second than the first) is the incorporation of physical, real world ‘illustration’ into the background - the kitchen mural in the first one and the map of northern egypt imposed onto the wall in the second one. the kitchen mural in the first one a) acts as a space filler, b) switches out underwater sea flora & fauna for those we would find above ground, and c) serves to ground a somewhat grandiose image in a setting that is entirely familiar to boy. regardless of who drew the mural i wanted to create a sense that boy is imagining alamein in this crazy situation and is still linking him back to their home. similarly with the map in the second one - it’s much more subtle but for boy it acts as a physical link between the alamein he knows (and with whom he shares a name), and the alamein he imagines (a man he watches on tv, who wins trophies and acclaim). because ultimately i wanted the surrealism to be tied completely to the place boy considers to be home to both him and alamein ("hey dad! welcome back!").

both of them reference colour theory in one way or another; admittedly less so than they once did (the first one was once upon a time lit entirely in red from below) because balancing meta and nice looking colour palettes is harder than it sounds, but it’s still there. the sea in the first drawing is far more green than perhaps it should be, but there’s still a decent amount of blue (mostly where the mural intersects with the background - the hope is tied to how boy incorporates his idea of home into the image). there is still red coming in at the bottom, there’s not much i can say here other than the fact that grief underpins the whole narrative and every relationship therein so you know. you do the maths lol. in the second one, alamein wears a blue & yellow rugby jersey. theres two reasons for this - firstly, it’s boy’s idea of hope winding its way through the narrative, and secondly (in an incredibly serendipitous turn of events), that’s the kit of the bay of plenty rugby union. sometimes things just work out i guess. it also works because i wanted it to be regional rather than local or national because that’s what i imagine boy means by the rugby team - a big enough honour that it still qualifies as projection but not too big that it takes alamein out of boy’s life in a tangible way. alamein in the all blacks doesnt make sense because boy still wants him to be tied to his concept of home. & of course not forgetting the red light to the right of the screen. there is grief in everything

speaking purely visually, they both have a haze to them, especially the second one. its the tv we see in their living room, because i wanted to place the image specifically within that context but with the feeling of being seen in a dream or through several layers of cellophane. it’s blurred around the edges, the colours separate from each other, it fades red into blue and back again; alamein is crystal clear but everything around him bleeds into everything else. boy is taking this made up image, putting it on tv, and putting the tv back in their living room. in essence it’s being filtered through at least three layers of memory and wishful thinking and hope, and then sold to us as the real deal. which to be honest sums up the whole film pretty well.

again visually, there’s a definite contrast between the drawings in terms of point of view. as i said before the second one is placed within their living room and is therefore from the perspective of someone in their house - par contre the first one is completely removed from that sort of context and actually exaggerates the surrealism in how we see alamein from below as if (story in a story moment) he’s in a blockbuster of his own. but it’s this difference that unites them; each pov is equally unlikely in their respective context and serves to round off each visual by placing it distinctly out of reach when contrasted with its relatively simple context [boy’s opening monologue - a child’s description of his life].

anywayyy pour conclure. i love this film so much oh my god i love narratives and peaceful conflict and grief and creation of identity and projection of identity and ‘never meet your heroes’ and ‘i met my hero and it went so wrong’ and and and. i love you red and green and blue and i love you unreliable narration. and i love putting all of that in a completely different context to what it was originally born into. i hope this all made sense & i hope it gives both of these drawings more context because i had a lot of fun putting all of this in there! and i hope you can all forgive the copious anachronisms in the second one lol

[kuroowo]

Kindly rank your moots self ships

👀👀 (I won’t be ranking them though I’ll just be talking about my fav from their self ships bc ranking them makes me sweat💀 wait so I guess I will be sort of ranking their ships but just with #1 LMAO)

P. S. I didn’t go through every mutual who had self ship info on their page (that’s too many 💀), so I did the ones I talk to more (& could find info about their ships on)!

@haikyooot

I’m sorry but the more I think about it, the more Kita x Emi reigns supreme in my heart😩 it’s the balance, the domesticity, the 7 kids Emi is willing to carry for her farmer man Kita Shinsuke😩😩🙏🏼🙏🏼 THE OG like truly, the parental couple where one is a secret wild child that the other tames occasionally with his dick love🥴KSKSKKSKS but they will parent u😩🙏🏼 (Just as Kita will parent emiSINWKXJ) tbh they’re the couple that has their shit together or has determination of the gods imo

@iwangel

Leya x Atsumu has such uncontrolled, but controlled sexy vibe 😩🙏🏼 they’re both chaotic in their own ways and I just love how they’re the ride or die type for each other with a hefty dash of heavy flirting and feral bites 🥴 whether the bites are out of love or playfulness, you can ask Leya & Tsum themselves LMAO

@quirrrky

Kuroo x Rei, tell me a better combo ILL WAIT😩💓 it’s the dynamics, the visuals, the aesthetic loveliness of these 2 that has me on my knees🧎🏻‍♀️🧎🏻‍♀️ THEYRE THAT COUPLE THAT PLAYFULLY ARGUES A LOT BUT IS JUST AS SICKENINGLY SWEET IN THE SAME BREATH like legit couple goals uwu

@tenrichouku

I’m not familiar with tokrev rn but yk what I am familiar with? Sukuna x Ava🥴 it’s the big bad guy x uwu girl with hidden fangs vibes OOF like u just know that nobody messes with either of them because it always ends in a blood bath and it won’t be sukuna’s or ava’s OOP 🤪🥴🥰

@mrsgiovanna

BriGio is canon at this point, no? FRRRRR They support and complement each other SO well 🧎🏻‍♀️💓 the couple that grows together & rules together 🙏🏼🙏🏼 ROYALTY VIBES but behind doors they’re just so sweet with each other it makes me melt UWUWUWU

@violetsoju

Kuroo & Lin uwu they’d be that couple where u see teasing each other but are actually just softies for each other uwuwuwu posts of their couple pics on social media will 100% make u think true love is real bc YALL SO CUTEUWUWUUWUWUWU Also Lin would deck a mf for Kuroo & kuroo would swoon and then instantly go ring shopping after 🥴👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻

@chifupurrs

Hirugami x Cat uwu they give me the classic ‘opposites attract’ vibes going on with hiru’s calmness & cat’s energy 😩🙏🏼 + how hiru would be able to pick up cat’s worries & comfort her while cat helps him let loose a little bit more AAAA SWEET BALANCE 🧎🏻‍♀️💓 animal lovers couple also v v cute uwu

@smolmo

Mo x Kiyoomi. MOOMI 🧎🏻‍♀️🧎🏻‍♀️🧎🏻‍♀️ Just like their very adorable ship name, I think mo & omi would be such a sweet couple 😭 mo would definitely make omi super soft and gooey uwu💓 she’d bring out the gentleness, the sweetness outta that man and he wouldn’t even realise until he’s an hour into cuddling u & playing with your fingers UWUUWUWUWU a very soft couple (but don’t fuck with them👁👁 do not especially fuck with mo because omi will hold nothing back 👏🏼)

@tetsvhoe

Kuroo x Gwen OMG they’re so in love. THEY’RE SO IN LOVE YOUR HONOUR ITS THE FLUFF-CRACK COUPLE EVERYONE LOVES😩🙏🏼 I just think this dynamic would be one of firecrackers, driving trips while belting out songs, and secretly giggling to each other uwu it’s the kind of love u see on Pinterest boards where it’s a collage of fun & nostalgic looking pics uwu

@sunshinetoshi

Ushi x Tara OMGJCOWMLD bc I think they’d be SO CUTE TOGETHER 😩😩😩🧎🏻‍♀️🧎🏻‍♀️🧎🏻‍♀️ big boi ushi being weak for sunshine tara like it’s the epitome of opposites attract + softies for each other 😭😭😭 defo think their dynamic is something shoujo mangas about sweet romance and light angst would go after uwu💓

@osaurimiya

Simba Samu like cmon now it’s just obvious at this point like the sweet & lowkey feral but super big brain x calm looking but is actually lowkey big hearted idiot uwu 💓 the way these two would get into trouble tgt bc samu likes to indulge in u (also bc he gets swayed SO easily LMAO) & also bc nauraiscomet has a very chaotic energy that pulls in samu 😩🙏🏼

@strawbearisamu

There’s no one else but Osamu🧎🏻‍♀️💓💓 im thinking chaos, but in the best way possible! A very fun relationship 💯💯💯 and I feel like y’all would be so supportive of each other, like hype man level AND I LIVE FOR THAT UWU also lots of aesthetic pictures & dates & picnics 🥰👍🏻

@alittlewhitetulip

The OG prosciutto 🧎🏻‍♀️ i rmb talking about our jjba ship hcs tgt and that was so wholesome🧎🏻‍♀️ very much my parental figures😩🙏🏼 theyre that couple that transcends time and they’re such a power couple too omfg like the fashion, the confidence, the strength & faith😩🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼 they have a very sophisticated aura too if yk what I mean? But watch out bc I know they’re cutthroat as hell!

Honourable mentions!

— bc I know vaguely who they simp for but not enough about their ship to choose & write about!

@vanille--kiss

Normally I’d say Kita but there’s something about Iwa x Vani that just wins me over🧎🏻‍♀️💓

@xmyshya

Suna! Something about your dynamic is just so cute and interesting omg I’d love to see more if I could 😩🧎🏻‍♀️

@jellyluchi

Pros, ofc🥴 like I’m getting you’d bring the gentleness outta him type of vibe and I love that😩

@moonbeamwritings

Abba! Theres a ‘super sweet & soft for each other, esp behind doors’ vibe and that’s so uwu 💓

@tunamiya

I’m not sure why but I just have this vivid image of u x sakusa in my head as the top couple🧎🏻‍♀️🙏🏼

@peachysamu

SAMUUUUUU two calm vibed people but there’s more that meets the eye 👀💓

@evrxx

Risotto! I just know it’s gonna be a very sweet & supportive/protective dynamic uwu

@buccellate

Ooooh this was hard but ultimately, it’s gotta be Bruno🧎🏻‍♀️🙏🏼 I just think y’all would be so wholesome😭💓

@jiaxiin

TSUKKI! Frenemies to lovers vibes but it’s very cute and wholesome and it’d make me squeal if I were to read a book about y’all’s story UWU

[mugentakeda]

how did they manage to sneak in here, but didnt notice me until i made myself known?

he was right about the tall one being a kid. theres a gnarly burn scar marring half his face, the leathered skin folding over his eye socket. his scowl is sharp and intimidating, but he looks exhausted and sickly. the shine of sweat sparkles in the green light of the corridor.

the older man has that same sharp look in his eyes with a deep and frustrated frown. his posture is tight, and he can see veins and tension in his fists the closer he gets to them.

something about the old mans face…. his posture…. familiar? no, something else.

“dont come any closer,” the kid snarls. raspy. maybe hes got a sore throat. whys he sneaking around lake laogai while hes sick? kids have nothing better to do these days.

“nephew,” the old man murmurs with urgency, “we need to leave.”

its just me, he thinks. the rest of them dont know youre both here.

he suddenly realizes that he has actually no clue why he came on his own to take care of this. pauses. tightens his grip on his spear.

his palms are sweating.

theyre both waiting for him to attack, but he…..

he lowers his spear.

“get out of here,” he orders. his voice is terrible and scary. like someone took a saw to his vocal cords. talking strains him anymore, so he usually tries not to.

they blink at him.

“you heard me. its not safe here. youll get in deep shit if youre caught. not every agent is as nice as me,” he repeats. he points at the kid and then shifts to the old man.

why the fuck are you down here with a kid? why does the kid have swords? prison conditions in ba sing se suck. get the fuck out of here, you old moron.

the kid is twitching and scowling like a rabbit-raccoon trying to escape a trap. but his swords are slightly lowered now, and hes backing up cautiously, thats good.

the old mans looking at him funny.

he knows he looks weird compared to the other agents. he has the same dark uniform as the rest of the lot, but the boss always has him wear these annoying bandages around his face to cover the scars, because hes supposed to be inconspicuous when he leaves the city for missions. his scars are pretty conspicuous. not every guy you come across has half a patchwork scarecrow face.

he ties up the sleeve on his missing arm so it doesnt flop around and get in the way of his blade, and that always makes his enemies think that makes him easy pickings, despite how the freaky bandages add to his glare. the obvious disability lures them in by their egos and they dont realize their mistake until his spear darts at them like a python and tears their throat out.

these two seem to be wary of him regardless. or maybe they just think that if hes there then his coworkers will follow.

he imagines that he looks nothing short of an evil spirit standing here at the edge of the shadows. but….

the old man isnt looking at him like hes disturbed by what he sees, he realizes. hes looking at him like-

its like when boss knows hes not telling him something, so hes trying to find the answers in his eyes.

hes being studied.

but its not just familiar. its almost… nostalgic. like long feng isnt the only person in the world thats looked at him like that.

“uncle,” the kid snaps.

that seems to snap the old man out of his daze, and he hesitantly reaches down to grab the kids wrist. they finally take off together down the hall.

the kids back is turned now and he can see the blue spirit mask dangling on the back of his neck.

ah, he thinks. that explains the swords. and the sneaking.

but what about the old man? uncle? hes never heard of the blue spirit having a companion. why were they both just down here, sneaking around? that old man was dressed in grass green robes, not at all suited for stealth. and was unarmed, as far as he could tell. not defenseless, judging by his overall demeanor, but still unarmed. what the hell was that?

boss is gonna tan his sorry hide for this.

hes never left lake laogai unless hes told. he shouldve turned right back around and alerted long feng, or alerted someone, he shouldnt have let them even leave, why the fuck did he do that?

hes following them.

and they both keep taking turns looking over their shoulder, so he keeps hopping shadow to shadow. he doubts he can hide from a blue spirit thats at full strength, but this blue spirit is putting some of his weight on old partner, and he looked sick in lake laogai. he sounded sick, too.

maybe hes injured.

why the fuck was that old man there with him. who are these fucking people. what business do they have down in the bowels of this city.

he ends up following them to an apartment in the lower ring. its still fairly busy at night, and hes having hell with avoiding his stupid coworkers that are also creeping around on the rooftops and in the shadows.

his ass is grass when he gets back home anyway, so he supposes it doesnt really matter if hes seen, but. if hes caught then those two morons are probably caught. he didnt crawl after them for an hour for nothing. he wasnt nice enough to let them go for nothing either. besides, if they get arrested, then…..

the silent inferno exploding in his gut and trying to claw its way up his throat hasnt let up since his eyes locked on that old man. hes not sure what hes looking for in this.

he makes himself at home behind a line of laundry.

he doesnt see them through the window yet, but he hears a door shut gently, some words being murmured, and then-

ceramic shattering. a heavy thud. the old man shouting-

zuko.

adding onto my dai list lu ten au thing where hes the only agent allowed in and out of ba sing se cus hes more of a lone wolf agent that does more assassin and spy type stuff for long feng personally rather than a secret police officer like the rest of the dai li. imagine he hears rumors about zukos burning and banishment in passing and just. Pauses. and feels a really sickening tug and harrowing deja vu for a while. not really sure why. like walking in a room and forgetting what you were doing and being deeply bothered about it all day. or getting acid reflux over something you don’t remember eating. or waking up from a bad dream you don’t remember anything about

[probably-haven]

Spoilers Galor ...... it is time.... for me to do what ive been considering for quite some time

this is my arguement... on why, whether romantically or platonically, i think you should ship or bro-ship,...... Childe.... and Albedo

HERE ME OUT I SWEAR PLEASE IT MAKES SENSE IN MY HEAD- JUST GIVE IT A CHANCE! rarepair shipping is painful- join me

OR DONT EVEN IF YOU DONT WANT TO GIVE THE SHIP A CHANCE I DO A LOT OF ANALYSIS ON ALBEDO AND CHILDE’S CHARACTERS INDIVIDUALLY, AS WELL AS THE FATUI, THEYRE METHODS, AND THE RELATION WITH MONDSTADT- AND OTHER STUFF- just- if you like reading different analysis-es of the game or ship material or anything- 

please just consider skimming it possibly- 

so for the first section of my argument, i will cover why this is a largely feasible possibility, so let’s set the stage

- Childe is from Snezhnaya, and he is shown to have a large amount of ties to his home, including but not limited to; his family, ice fishing, and just a large number of nostalgic references in his voice lines. 

- Because of this it’s a pretty common occurrence that he finds himself feeling homesick, as with many of the other Fatui.

- This is why he, like many of the other Fatui, so frequently visit and camp within Dragonspine, where the cold snowy atmosphere serves to remind them of home and the things they left behind.

- also in his birthday letter, it says he canonically visits Dragonspine, but explaining it this way gives it feeling 

- so considering that he would be in Dragonspine relatively often, and given the large number of Fatui camps in there regardless, it’s pretty clear he’d have heard of Albedo. So onto Albedo (unfortunately i wasnt there for his event so i dont have as much fuel, but it is what it is)

- there’s a few things that need to be asked first- It’s pretty clear that Albedo must have some interaction with the Fatui given the sheer number of them that camp in Dragonspine. Evidentially, he’s still alive so the question is why? and there’s a few possible explanations for this.

     - He just sneaks around a lot or avoids them (this i think is unlikely, as it would limit his actions while conducting experiments as well as the places where he’d be able to conduct them, which isn’t a big deal, but when there are other options I don’t think this is the one he’d pick)      - He just pulls a traveler and kills them (i don’t think he would do this except for as a last resort, he’s rather disconnected from any sense of empathy yes, but his time is better spent elsewhere. If it comes to that, it comes to that and he will, but he wouldn’t do it as his first option) (also i dont use geo characters much so idk how good he’d be at breaking their shields in this case)      - The Fatui don’t bother or attack him out of their own choice

- i think the third is the most likely, which sounds dumb but hear me out. 

- something that is stressed time and time again during the mondstadt archon quest is the fact that nobody wants to increase the always present strain on diplomatic relations between Mondstadt and Snezhnaya.      - Sure the Fatui do not care very much about this and have many ways to get around this. Signora attacking Venti (technically not a diplomat, and by disappearing she had plausible deniability; traveler’s words against her own, and really both traveler and Venti weren’t supposed to survive that, hence “leave no trace”), or the Fatui constantly attacking the traveler, (who’s canonically travelling alone with only Paimon, always on the move and encountering many unfamiliar dangers, not hard to clear up)      - However despite this, I still believe that Albedo’s safety(and by extent that of Sucrose and Timeus) on Dragonspine is maintained by a mixture of political agreement, situational convenience, and Albedo’s own actions

- its difficult for this to work but i believe it’s the most likely answer, combining all three possibilities that i mentioned above.  - Albedo is an official Knight of Favonius, so his death would cause a pretty dramatic commotion, and since he’s been in Dragonspine for as long as he has, if he was found dead outside of his lab- or suddenly disappeared, the first person to blame would be the Fatui.

- “But Flurp! what about the stuff you mentioned earlier, with Senora’s attack and the Fatui always going after the traveler?”

- context is key. The traveler is a traveler, and Venti was a necessity to achieve their goal. The traveler is also a huge threat to what they are trying to do, since the Fatui have probably heard of their accomplishments. Them attacking Venti was inevitable, no matter the strain it would cause. The fact that the traveler was there as well was merely coincidence in my opinion

- again “leave no trace” means the intent was that both the Traveller and Venti weren’t meant to survive. This is important because if the traveler disappeared, they would have vanished shortly after finishing what they had to do in mondstadt and thered be no reason to suspect anything had happened to them, just that they had moved onto Liyue. 

- Venti would pose risk, but again, the pros outweighed any risk it could have posed to their relations.

- with the Fatui regularly attacking the Traveler, again, that’s easy to clear up and would be difficult to pin on the Fatui, assuming how long it would take to realize they were gone (because despite helping so many people, its still natural to assume they’ve just travelled elsewhere)

- Albedo on the other hand, is technically a legal official, because of his high rank in the knights. He is also only ever really found in Dragonspine and Mondstadt the city. And he is well familiar with the dangers of Dragonspine, so if he were to die there it would be assumed to be either at the hands of the Fatui, or one of his own experiments.

- Thus attacking him is very high risk(unlike the traveler), and since he has nothing to do with their plans, low reward(unlike Venti). 

- So most likely he doesn’t needlessly interact with the Fatui, but should an experiment need to expand into the space of one of their camps, it’s likely he would need some kind of documentation to do so. At the same time, Albedo himself would also not be able to harm the Fatui who frequent the mountain. I TOOK WAY TO LONG TO EXPLAIN THAT UGGGGHHHHHHH anyways

- So set the stage, Childe is visiting Dragonspine, right? And he hears from whichever Fatui Camp he happens to stop in about the one Knight of Favonius that they keep seeing around Dragonspine, the one who just last week came to them with a stack of documents saying they would have to move their camp, it’s annoying but they have orders not to attack him. 

- and then there’s Childe, who’s been living in Liyue, surrounded by people who basically fear Dragonspine as if its some kind of deadzone, and he just assumed that for anyone not from Snezhnaya, thats exactly what it was. He assumed nobody but the Fatui would dare even visit there, let alone be there as frequently as whoever this person was. 

- And he’s got to be pretty important for there to be orders not to attack him, right?       - cue Childe’s unique brand of curiosity, so he asks more, apparently the fellow has a geo vision, and had been spotted taking down or even just lurking by a number of Dragonspine’s dangers as though it was merely routine       - cue flashback to when he first met the traveler, instantly hesitant, hostile, and potentially even afraid towards him as soon as he realized he was Fatui, even before revealing himself as a harbinger.

- so what was it about this guy that made him so convinced he could walk into a Fatui camp alone, order them around, and still walk out alive. Even Childe could admit how underhanded the Fatui were at times, their true orders could have been anything

- He’s not just going to leave now, no. So he asks more questions and figures out that they did at one point scout out his lab while the Knight was out, and give him the location. He’s a harbinger, what are they gonna say “sorry sir, can’t tell ya” no, these bitches see him with the same amount of fear they’d have for Dotorre or Scaramouche or La Signora or any of the others- you don’t just tell a harbinger “no”

- So anyways Childe decides to check it out 

- in the case that Albedo’s mid experiment in his lab when this happens, he’ll probably assume it’s a Knight, since the Fatui haven’t tried anything in quite some time and would just send off a quick “I am in the middle of an experiment right now, I would prefer not to be disturbed”      - and Childe would laugh at his voice because let’s be honest, he thinks of himself as a Chad and it just sounds “weak” to him, and then the scenario leads into what would happen even if he wasnt mid-experiment

and now a look into Albedo’s perspective

- let’s assume that the Knights heard about the Traveler’s role in what happened in Liyue, since it’s kind of common knowledge that Childe was the one who did it, and the traveler doesn’t exactly try to hide that he fought Childe. So considering how often the knights and the Fatui clash, and what happened with Signora, they would likely ask the traveler about it, in order to be better prepared, and for that same reason i feel like the traveler would tell them some of it. 

- so in this situation, it’s likely that Albedo would recognize him and likely know an amount of his combat abilities, and the thing with the fake seals of permission/Osial, but I don’t think the Traveler would have given told any more than that

- so here’s Albedo, surrounded by Fatui camps, knowing that he knows more about this Harbinger than the other thinks he does and assuming that Childe knows more about him himself, but just how much does he know.

- it’s the first time one of the Fatui has come to his lab in- he doesn’t know how long (other than the occasional instance of a wounded member risking the encounter in a moment of desperation. He’s observed that those who wield hydro have never been present in any of these instances, and are most likely designated as healers, but he isn’t in the best position to find out.)      - and the fact that the first Fatui to come to his camp(out of anything other than necessity) is a Harbinger, is certainly very off putting, as he knows that Childe most certainly has the ability to change the orders of the Fatui around him whose cooperation with him is something that he recognizes as very fragile

- and he knows it’s unlikely, in the back of his mind he keeps recalling that this specific Harbinger is the one who resurrected a dead god for the purpose of destroying a city (flashback to the famous “if I destroy Mondstadt” line) but he reminds himself that it’s highly improbable and thus illogical to jump to that conclusion, but he is nonetheless very on edge with Childe’s presence

- However, as with the rest of the Fatui, his hands are legally tied, and unless Childe moves to attack him, any move he makes would only serve to reflect on the rest of the knights

- As such neither would attack the other in this scenario, though Childe would very much want to, and Albedo would very much be prepared to.      - and both of these people are very observant (Albedo in the general sense and Childe in the ‘reading body language for combat’ sense) so both of them are completely aware of that, though Albedo would probably acknowledge that it may just be a result of his own paranoia

- However, unless Childe has orders otherwise, he tends to approach interactions with a more amiable attitude, extending his hand and introducing himself as “Childe,” less flamboyant than normal, because yes he’s extra, but not an idiot, he’s not gonna say “hey girlie, hold still” when the guy obviously has his hand tensed like that, “discretely” ready to reach for whats assumed to be a weapon, a melee one based on the position, sword or polearm probably

- Albedo, isn’t really one for pleasantries though, he has a number of things he still needs to do, and he does not want this Harbinger in or nearby his camp. “I’m aware” he says, giving his full attention, so as not to be caught off guard, and to get this over as quickly as possible. “I assume you have some purpose behind this visit. I am rather busy at the moment, so i would prefer that we keep this interaction brief.”

- and Childe is a little shit who still doesn’t know how to associate violence and hostility with any kind of bad vibes so he just laughs and holds up his hands “relax relax, I’m not here on business, no need to be on edge, right?”

- But Childe has a tendency while speaking to, knowingly or unknowingly, give his words a rather ominous tone. That and the fact that Albedo is in his lab, one of few places in Dragonspine where any misfortune that might befall him could be pinned on his own experiments keeps him from letting down his guard just yet. 

HOWEVER i cant do dialogue... and this isn’t technically a fanfiction so i can summarize-

- Childe is basically all like “so why the shit are you in dragonspine comrade? i thought yall hated it”

- and albedo is all “experiments and this is where my lab is, is ” but like- not key details cuz he isnt going to reveal stuff to the fatui

-and Childe basically be like “ why up here, isnt there other places,” cuz he legit doesn’t get it. He gets that his mindset isn’t the norm, so he’d assume Albedo would want to do anything to avoid Dragonspine and its dangers like what seems to be the norm for what most people hes interacted with have generally agreed

- and Albedo says some flowery words for like oh “In the pursuit of knowledge if one allows themselves to be dissuaded by potential dangers, then they will find it quite difficult to progress beyond that which is already known”

- which, is important cuz it reflects Childe’s mindset on getting stronger, so he’s like yeah, checks out, and being the extroverted shit he is, he has the guts to ask “aren’t you gonna ask why im in dragonspine?” or something because honestly he likes talking about himself, and thats a topic that doesnt have to do with the fatui so it’s an easy way to make conversation.

- and Albedo, who has by now slightly relaxed just enough to resume preparing the experiment he was preparing before Childe came in. and all passive aggressively is like “The same as the rest of the Fatui, most likely. Now if you don’t mind I do have a number of experiments to conduct and I’m afraid it can get rather dangerous, so it would be best that you take your leave now”

- and Childe gets the message that he’s essentially being told to fuck off but he’s also cheeky as shit and absolutely loves to test his luck so he’d be all “I thought you said not to be dissuaded by potential dangers” sounding all proud of himself for using the other’s words against him 

- and Albedo doesn’t have time for this so he just turns back towards Childe, same tone and same face as before, and repeats “it would best that you take your leave”

- Now Childe doesn’t see this as a challenge persay, but he sees how easily it can turn into one, and speaks the two cliche words “make me”

- but Albedo is also a little shit and just turns to resume his experiment, letting out a sigh “Stay if you’d like. I didn’t consider this possibility but I may have to request my lab be made off limits to the Fatui. A shame, I didn’t plan to return to Mondstadt for quite some time”

- and Childe, he’s decently smart- and he knows a number of things, 1 the other harbingers are gonna be pissed if they find out he caused more work for them again, 2 this individual is interesting and he very much wants the opportunity to fight them in the future, and 3 he’s not involved in politics and should Albedo follow through, the Harbingers wouldn’t give 2 shits if he asked them to try and get the change reversed.

- and so he leaves, but he’ll be back

- Albedo’s threat may have given him the upper hand for now, but it also served as a challenge he wouldn’t forget.       - of course it’s not really that big a deal though, just if he’s ever in Dragonspine again and there’s nothing nearby to kill, he’d keep it in mind, and hey, best case scenario he can get more information to contribute to the Fatui

OKAY

- so now that Childe is gone and Albedo is able to reflect on the interaction, at first he’s just relieved nothing bad happened

- within the following day he reflects once again, deciding that the Harbinger most likely wasn’t lying about his intentions, he truly did seem seem to merely have been curious as he had claimed

- in hindsight he also realizes that conversing with him may also allow him to confirm or deny a number of the theories he had on the Fatui, or perhaps raise more questions for him to look into that he had not yet considered... or at least it could as long as he was careful about how he asked.

- AND THUS there a few more meetings, many are purely conversational, each trying to get knowledge from the other while being fully aware that the other is trying to do the same      - not the type of battle Childe is used to, and it does get boring at times, but it’s all part of the game so he persists

- and eventually, as Albedo recognizes this as a regular thing, he begins enlisting Childe’s help in a number of experiments. Just figuring that since he’s doing an experiment and Childe is there regardless, it’s the most efficient option. That and it keeps the more dangerous questions to a minimum, often redirecting the questions towards alchemy, a much safer topic that he does not need to step so carefully around in order to discuss.

- There comes a point where Childe decides to point out the fact that Albedo most often has him help out with combat-requiring aspects of his experiments, and questions why

- Albedo, figuring it was obvious, reminds him of the conversation a few visits ago, where Childe mentioned his drive to get stronger, and(to requote) said that if he didn’t feel these opponents were sufficient to increase Childe’s strength, he could always bring in a couple Oceanids to fight. He then points out afterwards that ruin guards are a bit easier to fight with a bow

- Mixed responses from Childe including but not limited to      - quickly refusing in the language of hydro vision panic, followed quickly by      - oh, so he’s been trying to help this whole time, to-      - how the fuck would he bring Oceanids to Dragonspine, is that even possible?      - followed by curiosity

- and so he brings up the point that he’s never seen Albedo fight, which is a shame. “If you can’t take them down on your own just say so, no need to make excuses.” because heck yeah he’s going to taunt him, I mean this is Childe

- which of course Albedo returns with “If you want to see me in combat, follow your own advice” because of course, by now he knows about Childe’s combat obsession, like you don’t need to know him that long to figure it out, its kind of obvious. 

- but he recognizes the intention, so he finishes what he’s doing checking what he needs for his future plans before exiting the lab, Childe following behind him, eager to see his future opponent in action

- so albedo goes to a ruin guard/grader/hunter(one of those), because otherwise it’s hilichurls or abyss mages and he knows enough to be able to tell that’s not exactly the kind of opponent Childe meant, and he would prefer not to have the topic brought up again, if he knew how to avoid it.

- so Childe stands back and Albedo, who is well accustomed to having to defeat the enemies in Dragonspine in order to get components for his alchemy knows exactly how to kill this bitch cuz honestly, the number of these guys he’s probably killed for research purposes is astronomical, so it’s done rather quickly and methodically, as if just another part of routine, exactly the way that it had been described when Childe was first asking the Fatui at that one camp about the alchemist.

- And that interest/intrigue that had started in the side of Childe’s mind and grew over time into one of the reasons(tho not the main reason) that he would often go to Dragonspine... it multiplied exponentially

- cue a few more visits and a new turning point occurs

Klee

- Childe comes to visit, and upon arriving at the lab he sees a child

- cue Childe approaching again, amiable grin on is face “and who’s this young lady”       - because it’s literally canon that he’s good with kids

.....

- but Klee isn’t any kid

- and Klee was there for the briefing so she has just as much information on Childe as any of the other higher ranking knights      - and only that much information

- a short time later they’re cleaning up the scattered remains of what was Albedo’s last experiment, lucky that the explosion was set off near the entrance so the damage wasn’t too extensive

- “Please don’t tell Master Jean, Dodocco said he was sorry”

- Cue Childe’s “I’m not a bad guy... okay I’m kind of a bad guy” quote       - “but I mean no harm, I’m a friend of Albedo’s”

- and Albedo’s standing there like when I agree to that but he wants to see how this plays out

- and I’m really unfamiliar with Klee’s characterization, but you get the point Childe is canonically god at kids, he’s gonna learn that Klee’s basically Albedo’s little sister, Klee’s gonna get attached to him and remind him of his siblings back home, Childe’s interaction with Klee is basically what gets Albedo to start actually somewhat trusting Childe as opposed to just using him from a metaphorical distance and subtly helping in ways that wouldnt really negatively impact the knights

- and now that hes no longer actively distrustful his mind is more open to actually becoming attached, as he now begin to recognize that that which he initially believed to be mere manipulation tactics was actually just... Childe being genuine, or as genuine as a person can be in their situation

OKAY OKAY OKAY NOW THAT ALL THAT IS ESTABLISHED I CAN GET INTO THE DYNAMIC 

- so theres the obvious things i already mentioned, like their mutual extreme drive to improve in their respective fields that separates them from others, even within their own respective groups/organizations which already(to an extent) separate their members from most others

now lets talk about this point specifically

- both Childe and Albedo are capable of helping each other grow in their respective fields.

- two things that have the potential to cause Childe trouble and lessen his combat ability and the problems with his delusion and his foul legacy transformation

- these two things are things likely unlike anything that Albedo has been able to study before (tho delusions he might have some experience with- but it’s unlikely) and it would likely be able to expand his knowledge, were he given the opportunity to experiment them, while simultaneously helping childe improve his strength

HOWEVER

- both of them know just how fragile the relationship(whatever it is) between them is, how quickly tensions can shift and orders can change, so in order to protect both the other and themselves they both understand that actually going through with this wouldn’t truly be safe and both sides could get in trouble for it

- because no matter what they do there will always be a constantly present risk hanging over their heads, but ill come back to that

- Dragonspine      - in a lot of Albedo ships, the other character has to go through the effort of going to Dragonspine, which tends to serve as an obstacle for the relationship to be overcome (exception of sucrose and... idk do people ship him with Timeus? just in case, recognizing them both as potential exceptions)       - However, in the case of Childe, who legitimately enjoys coming to Dragonspine, he wouldn’t hesitate to visit Albedo      - with most it becomes “wow, i haven’t seen Albedo in a while, gee, i wish he’d come down the mountain, nonetheless i am a good lover so i shall make the harsh trek to see my beloved”      - with this bitch Childe tho it’s more like “oops, feelin’ homesick, Imma see how Albedo’s doing, hope he’s made progress, wonder if Klee will be there” or “Wow I haven’t seen Albedo in awhile. Finna finish up these fatui duties real quick and head over, if i say im checking on the Fatui stationed there, I dont even have to ask to go on leave” (he gets in trouble for not officially asking for a day off anyways)

-anywho, Childe is largely used to interacting with the Harbingers, who always seem to have some other secret second layered plan of sorts that he’s not always informed about (ex: him being intended to fail when he summoned Osial, but being kept in the dark about it), which conflicts with Childe’s relatively straight forward nature      - Albedo also possesses the potential to be similar, however he doesn’t often see the need for such things, preferring to be frank about his goals and expectations, so unlike with his fellow harbingers, Childe knows that when Albedo tells him something or asks something of him, what he’s being told is usually exactly what actually is true/intended. And if it’s not, Albedo is the kind of person to explain that it’s something he can’t tell him, which he understands, since he has his own share of things he cant share because of his Fatui alignment.

- there is going to be an interaction where at some point Childe is rambling about his family back home, and Albedo questions him about what they look like, a few days later handing him a surprisingly accurate drawing of his siblings      - “I did have to try to check appearance with the traveler but unfortunately they weren’t in Mondstadt, do I do hope there aren’t too many inaccuracies”      - Homeboy doesn’t cry(probably) but he gets really fucking close      - cue socially isolated Alchemist boy misunderstanding and trying to apologize, which Childe responds to by just hugging him- because both of these boys are touch starved and honestly they fucking need it. 

- and now that Childe knows Albedo doesn’t actually have a significant boundary on physical affection, as with most Childe ships... it happens a lot

- headcanon that Childe tends to just lean/rest his head on things like a dog.  - additional headcanon that Albedo tends to have a need to keep his hands busy at all times     - so just cue the scene where Albedo is working on experiments as usual, Childe watching from behind with his head rested on his shoulder and Albedo just absentmindedly playing with his hair with one hand while the other continues with his work

- also talking with Albedo gives Childe a a lot of harmless fun facts and he loves rubbing it in they’re faces when he gets to correct one of the other harbingers on something because of this

- Albedo does also have a tendency to overthink things though, and Childe’s more straight forward mindset gives a new perspective that helps him work around issues more often than he would have expected

- Also Albedo’s love language is totally words of affirmation (i will die on this hill, he doesn’t even realize he does it probably). So he wouldn’t hesitate to sincerely thank or praise Childe whenever he helps or does something good. And Childe is a Fatui, most of the praise he gets is from the subordinates who admire him yes, but also lowkey highkey fear him, and especially after all of Liyue knows he summoned Osial basically, he is pretty damn starved for affirmation and praise and wouldn’t even notice just how much until Albedo gave that to him.      - like Childe is over here melting into a puddle of fluff and Albedo probably wouldn’t even realize what he’s doing, he’s just stating his observations out loud

- Childe and Albedo making a pinkie promise, Childe does the little Snezhnayan chant, and Albedo’s gaze just shifts slowly towards the nearby frozen lake in intense concern

- They go ice fishing with Klee who introduces Childe to fish blasting and it’s a whole new world of possibilities now. Albedo has many regrets.

- the harbingers have all basically figured it out by now and are concerned about security but mostly they just mock him for it      - the Fatui stationed in Dragonspine however, probably know because 1 they’ve seen Childe with Albedo almost every time he visits, and Childe brags about it regularly           - at this point a majority of them ship it and needless to say Albedo’s risk of death via Fatui has gone down significantly, and it’s had a surprisingly positive benefit on relations between the knights and Fatui overall

- the Knights took a bit longer to catch on, since Albedo isn’t exactly in Mondstadt all that often, but it’s the city of freedom, what are they gonna do? say no? again, they are concerned about security risks, but trust Albedo to recognize what should be withheld.

- also its canon that Childe enjoys cooking, and Albedo has a line about like... let me look it up rq- It’s his “Least Favorite Food” line which talks about how he doesn’t eat at restaurants cuz he has a small appetite and doesn’t want to waste food, which is unfortunate cuz then he has to spend time making his own food      - idk its kind of small but i just saw it and thought it was kind of a cute detail

- Childe is a chaotic bean and we love him for it      - on the other hand Albedo is more calm and patient, able to put up with this, and realistically, he has enough experience with Klee to not accidentally put him out or down or otherwise dampen his natural personality...... it’s just when the two of them get together that Albedo experiences true fear.

- Albedo: I have an idea for an experiment but the Jean has suggested that the risk is- - Childe: you should do it! - Albedo: -that the risk is too great and has disallowed me from continuing it - Childe: Oh? well she can’t tell me not to it, now can she?  - Both: *mutual gremlin noises*

anyway... im probs gonna add more to this later.... I’m just really bad at coming up with ship dynamics- so my main point in this is to get people to realize that it possible and that it could work- because there is... nearly 0 material on it- and i just think it has the potential to be so wonderful but I do not have the potential to make it that way. Like it has the potential for so many different dynamics and iconic moments and theres so many reasonable ways they could meet and just so many possibilities and im just really hoping to show the ship to more people because, y’know, it’s rare and i want them to suffer from the lack of content too, because I’m just a kind person like that.

i would have put it under a cut if i could, but i have no idea how to do that so... apologies...

[weirdcor3]

how to make weirdcore on photoshop!! :D

i got a great ask from @demonic-screeching about how i do my shit, so i thought id make a more detailed post here! ive been making wierdcore on this blog since january 2021, so ive learnt a lot! more under the cut.

1. find a base image!! i use imgur and pinterest. imgur is especially great because its full of old ass images of the most random shit. you dont even need an account, just hop in and search for mundane stuff like 'hallway', 'field', 'house', etc! explore! screenshot/save any images you think would be cool in an edit- make your own personal archive!! they could even be stills from videos, memes, etc!

2. cropping! this is important. cropping determines the amount of context an image has, as well as focusing on a main point. weirdcore is about removing context, which makes images seem familiar yet unfamiliar at the same time. it also adds to the amateur quality of the aesthetic- "why has this person taken this weirdly specific photo?" 99% of the time they didnt! i just cropped the shit out of it!

lets use an example of one of my old edits :) cool concept, cool base image. but it seems like its missing something.... what if we........

cropped it all out????

it is now....... free of context! where are we? where are we going???? who fuckin knows man...... we just gotta gtfo real quick by the sounds of it. the cropping has also compressed the image, which makes it feel even more weird and nostalgic! which brings me to my next point:

3. compression. make sure ur edits are lookin cRUNCHY! weirdcore is about amateurism and nostalgia, so use any means to make ur photos look like theyre from 2003! my personal method is zooming out of the image on photoshop so it gets smaller, then screensotting just the image, then opening the screenshot up in another document and zooming in again to reveal the compression.

4. fonts and captions! these are not necessary, but add to an edit a great deal! common fonts in weirdcore are Helvetica, Arial, and Times New Roman because theyre Normal And Boring, which really adds to the amateur aspect of weirdcore. i like to experiment with gothic and 3D fonts which can give a more webcore-y feel. this site is great for making free 3D text that you can download and add to your edits in photoshop!

as for captions, experiment! use random phrases that are stuck in your head, the more abstract the better! weirdcore is a surprisingly good way to express weird and abstract feelings. keep things vague and intriguing. ask questions!

5. editing. again, experiment! i normally fiddle with the saturation, brightness, and contrast. don't max out every setting- try and think about how you want the image to look! light or dark? bright or dull? you dont always have to tweak things if you think theyre fine as they are. other good tools include liquify, bevel/emboss, smart sharpen, gaussian blur, and warp! liquify is my favourite because you can squish and stretch the image! you can also try warping your captions too! the blemish tool is also rlly good! it can give u some weird trippy blurred out effects.

clone stamping can also help you to morph and duplicate parts of the image too! its very cool

6. go insane!!!!!!!! throw all basic design principles out the window. ignore the rule of thirds. stretch things. make them crunchy ass jpgs. use horrible colours. think about what youd do if you were a child with access to photoshop in 1997, or a middle aged conspiracy theorist making images for their cryptid blog. or like idk some weirdo on myspace.

7. orbs. use the brush tool to make orbs! theyre really good for blocking parts of an image, adding an ominous presence, making shadows, or adding bright lights! shape them, stretch them, make them funny colours. you could also use rectangles, circles, stars, etc... any shapes are cool!

8. inspiration! follow weirdcore blogs on tumblr! ask questions! learn! other resources include the weirdcore wiki and the weirdcord discord server! its where i learned a lot of what i know now, its very active, and has tons more resources there!!

overall, just experiment. you never know until you try, and its fun to develop your personal weirdcore style! its a very broad aesthetic that everyone can contribute to, and a cool outlet!

and lastly, dont worry about followers and likes! online, weirdcore is very random. some of my edits i spent 4378294 years on get like 5 notes, while i can shit something out in 5 minutes that ends up becoming my top post. popularity is pretty irrelevant here. just have fun and do things your own way!