#like i’ve looked up some clips of his va talking to get an idea of his voice and tbh? he’s a pretty good choice for jon imo

[jonathanohnn]

in light of the atsv trailer dropping in eight days, here’s a jon doodle to celebrate blorbo from my spidermans getting mainstream recognition

[astrovian]

Richard Armitage interview on BBC Radio Somerset for Uncle Vanya (25/10/20)

Full transcript under cut

Now the moment you’ve all be waiting for, particularly if you’re female – some proper eye-candy on this show okay, not just me. ‘Kay, some proper stardom. Richard Armitage has been in so much television okay, let’s give you a bit of an idea as to what he’s been in over the years. Of course, he started off in North & South back in 2004. He was Lucas North in the British TV drama Spooks. He was in Castlevania, he was in Robin Hood. He’s done so much work for The Royal Shakespeare Company. But for lots of you, you’ll have seen him in Peter Jackson’s The Hobbit. Here’s him talking a little bit about his role.

[Clip from The Hobbit interview – I play a character called Thorin Oakenshield, son of Thráin, son of Thrór, the last King Under the Mountain. There’s a direct descent from the royal line, which is myself, Thorin, and Fíli and Kíli, who are nephews by my sister]

Now, I’ve never seen The Hobbit, but whenever I think of Richard Armitage, it’s always- he was the guy in the last couple of episodes of The Vicar of Dibley.

[Clip from The Vicar of Dibley]

Brilliant, from Dibley to the valleys of New Zealand. Fantastic. Really pleased we can say we can speak to Richard Armitage on the show this afternoon to talk about his brand new film. Good afternoon, Richard. Thanks for joining us on the Sunday show. How are you?

I’m very good. How are you?

I’m great, thanks. Now, I say good afternoon, but you’re in New York, so it’s good morning to you over there.

Good morning. Yes.

Now you’ve done so much TV and film it’s ridiculous. If I sat here and listed out all the stuff you’ve done, we’d be here all day. However, we’re chatting about the latest one. Am I saying it right – Uncle ‘Van-ya’ or ‘Va-nya’? I’ve always said ‘Va-nya’.

You can say either, I mean a lot of the actors in our play were sort of from the North or from Ireland, and so we were calling him ‘Van-ya’. Sort of has a nicer ring to it, doesn’t it?

Yeah, let’s go with Uncle ‘Van-ya’. Yeah, now this is the-

Uncle ‘Van-ya’.

Now this is on Tuesday, you can see this from Tuesday onwards. Give us a bit of backstory. You were doing this as a play, but then Covid hit and it all had to change, is that right?

Yeah, we were in the middle of a, of a sixteen-week run and we’d-, we got through about ten weeks, and then we came in on a Monday morning and theatres were closed and we, we all had to go home. But it was something that we knew was coming, obviously Broadway had closed the week before us, and uh, so the chance to come back, even in a really still very difficult working environment, to, to sort of re-stage the play for film was something I think we were all incredibly grateful for.

Because not every play’s doing that – lots of plays have closed and we don’t know when they’re gonna re-open. But it must be a great thing to have because not every play was having that, were-, you know some of them were still just waiting for their moment to open up again.

Yes, and I mean National Theatre Live and Digital Theatre, they do film theatre, but they usually do it with a, with an audience in place, and that’s part of the, the thrill of it. But we had to- or, Sonya Friedman and her team had to sort of re-imagine what it might be like without an audience, and so this is a kind of hybrid film really, it-, we’re still in a theatre, but we’re much more kind of involved in the play and the camera comes into the stage and we see a little bit more than a regular production. But yeah, I feel very lucky that we were able to do this.

So it’s not like if you, if we had gone and seen it before it closed we’re obviously sat there looking on, but in this, in this version, the camera’s on the stage with you, you’re pretty much right in with the action, aren’t you?

You’re right in there, and I think that’s one of the, one of the y’know, unusual experiences, that that’s often not possible because you can’t, y’know, disrupt an audience’s viewpoint, so we tend, y’know, we tend to see theatre and hear an audience. Which, we lose the sound of an audience and that was very important with this play because the play is a comedy and y’know, the audience participation is, is really quite important. But it’s still a-, an interesting experience without the audience. In fact, there’s this sort of sadness for the audience’s lack, y’know.

Your character, you’re Astrov, is that right?

Yeah, I am. I’m the doctor.

Tell me a bit about him. What’s he like?

Well, he’s a bit of an outsider to this, to the family. Um, he’s, um, turned to drink because he is traumatised by losing patients, um, he’s working in a, in a region that’s suffering from an epidemic. At the same time, he’s recognising that his small corner of the world is being depleted environmentally, and so he’s, he’s, he’s an environmentalist. He’s planting trees and trying to sort of sustain his natural habitat, and he has a theory as to what, y’know, why people are sick and why our society is sick. And so, in terms of relevance, I think it, it sort of rang a lot of bells. Um, but he, y’know, in terms of his journey through the play, he finds love. Y’know, he talks early on in the play about not feeling anything because he’s been so battered down by his, his work, but he finds love and, um, is rejected. And you know, that’s the tragedy of Chekov, is that everyone’s in love with the wrong person.

And Chekov plays are very well-known, and they’re incredibly written as well. For you as an actor, to say you’re doing Chekov in the West End, or in this case in the cinema, that must be wonderful.

Yeah, it always sounds very kind of, um, highbrow, but Chekov didn’t write that many plays, and he’s also – y’know, he was a doctor as well himself. So there’s always a doctor in his plays. He writes about people, and I think that’s what attracts actors to this work. He doesn’t, he’s not so focused on the plot, he’s very much about the human experience and how we attract and repel each other. And he’s also a great purveyor of comedy and, y’know, finding fun with our, our flaws, and I think people will watch this after living in lockdown for six months, watching these people in a house that can’t get away from each other and are, y’know, ripping shreds, tearing shreds off of each other and, and kind of going out of their heads, and I think audiences will understand what Chekov was all about.

And this is available from Tuesday, unclevanyacinema.com, but you’re over in New York, so are you on the next project already, or are you doing something over there?

No, this is, this is where I, I live when I’m not working. But I’ll be back in, in England next year, I’m working on another Netflix show, so that will be good.

Now, when I said that Richard Armitage was coming on, it was- oh, the ladies, they go mad you know, ‘cause you’re so damn good-looking. And all these people, they’re on about the blimming Hobbit and all that sort of stuff, which is fantastic. But for me, do you know what thrills me most about you?

Go on.

You’re the guy that married Dawn French in The Vicar of Dibley. That’s the first thing that comes to my mind-

*Laugh* I knew you were gonna say that.

I know that for a lot of people it’s The Hobbit, and I know how big those sort of things are, and I know how good this, this new film is, but for me, you say ‘Richard Armitage’, he’s the guy who was nearly cheated on Dawn French.

Thanks for that.

No, not on-

He wasn’t cheatin’ on her.

He wasn’t, but she thought he was. But you’ve done so much-

Maybe they’ll re-run it at Christmas, who knows.

Oh, they re-run it all the time, Vicar of Dibley. Can’t move for it.

Do they?

Oh, they can’t move for it. UK Gold, it’s on every half hour. I hope you’re getting royalties for all these repeats.

I do too! I didn’t know it was on.

Oh, it’s on all the time. On all the time! But when you, when Covid’s out of the way as such, do you go back on stage with this, or has that sort of run its course now as a play, and you’re just gonna, it’s new life is now in the cinema?

I, yeah, I don’t think we’ll get the chance to go back, and I think that’s to do with the theatre is now being handed over to the fantastic David Tennant who’s gonna perform there-

Of course.

And the set is gonna be taken away, so I think this was a last chance to, to sort of discover the, this play. But I’m thrilled it’s on film, y’know. Film is forever, so…

That’s a good thing. I will just- if I don’t do twenty seconds on, twenty seconds on The Hobbit, the people will go mad. Great thing to be involved in, is it still something people ask you about?

It’s massive, I mean it was such a huge part of my life as well. Life-changing, y’know, going to New Zealand and working with one of my cinematic idols, y’know, Peter Jackson and that whole cast was, was phenomenal, and y’know, one of my favourite childhood books, so I, I couldn’t have asked- it was a dream come true really. And I, uh, still have incredible memories of that time.

So, Uncle Vanya, okay, is out from Tuesday, unclevanyacinema.com, but to be honest with you-

.com!

I’ve just been doing some googling, and if you just type in to any search engine ‘Uncle Vanya’, it comes up as the top listing. I mean there’s some great reviews for it as well-

Brilliant! And have you been to the cinema in this time?

I haven’t!

Are you getting out and going?

No, I haven’t been, that’s what I’m thinking, I should go and do it.

Give it a shot! I’ve done it, I did it a few times while I was there, and y’know, if you do obey all the rules and let the cinema take, y’know, do what you’re ‘sposed to do, wear the mask, it’s fine. It feels like normality. I mean, it’s like a Tuesday afternoon when there’s not that many people in there, but it’s still, y’know, still worth it.

I’m not minding that you see, ‘cause you’re guaranteed-

No.

-not to be next to someone who’s gonna be eating their popcorn in your face.

Chewing their popcorn.

Yeah.

Exactly.

That’s it. Or you get the couple in the back getting off with each other. I’m quite glad to be on my own there watching.

*Laugh*

That’s absolutely fine.

Is that what happens in cinemas in Somerset there?

Oh, it does, it does. Not-

*Laugh*

-not as much as I’d like. Well, look, Richard, it’s been a pleasure to speak to you, you are a gentleman, and I’ll give you a big plug again, Uncle Vanya comes out on Tuesday, unclevanyacinema.com, the reviews are great, it’s got five stars everywhere. Thanks so much for your time.

Thanks Andy.

[averagespawn]

Wrote a fanfic...might make more and add to it...there is an oc.

The cold…it was so cold.

  Her first memories were in the bleakest part of the year.

 And it was….so, damn, cold.

 The mattress she woke up on was resting on a wooden floor with dirty stone walls. The only noises reaching her were the brisk footsteps.

Her eyes were still blurry, but she could make out figures standing in front of her. Two hefty figures in grey uniforms and two in white coats.

“They…. were…talking? Mumbling? “What were they saying…?” She thought.

One of the figures in a white coat knelt next to her and shined a bright light into her eye, then moving over to the next one. Then got up, said something to the other white coat, and left the room with the others, but not before locking the metal door behind them.

 Her head was pounding, spinning, and doing everything that it was not supposed to do. She struggled just to roll over and get on all fours before collapsing on her stomach. She felt weak, as if heavy weights were strapped to her arms and legs.

She lied there for some time before trying to bring herself up again, using the dusty stone wall to support herself. It was taking a lot of energy just to get on her feet, leaving her winded and aching all over. She held this position for a while before taking one step away from the wall, allowing her to support herself.

“Ich sehe, Sie wach sind,” said a deep, old voice.

She opened her eyes and looked around, vision still a bit blurry, but able to make out details much better. Towards the door it was a figure in a white coat accompanied by a man in a grey uniform, who was armed with a rifle.

“W-what d-did you sss-say?” It was hard to talk as well…. anything other than laying down was difficult to do.

“Ah! Englisch. Vhat I said vas, I—see—that—you—are—avake,” the deep, old voice said slowly, enunciating every word. “Vhy, don’t you rest, hm?” he gestured to the mattress on the floor.

She slowly began lowering herself, collapsing to the mattress once more.

“Are you…avare? Can you talk?”

She was lying face up, resting her hands on her stomach “y-yea, I--think—so.” Her head was still spinning but her vision was becoming less blurry.

“Very good. Now I am going to ask you some basic questions and I vant you to anshure them as accurately as possible, do you understand?” The man in the white coat grabbed a chair and clip board, settling himself against the metal door across from her.

“Uh, sure.”

“Good. First question, vhat is your name?”

“It’s…. uh….um…uhh…….” She paused and widened her eyes, “I don’t……. I don’t…. know.”

“Next question, vhere are you from?” She kept staring towards the ceiling, eyes wide with her hands wringing. “Are you shtill vith me?”

“Oh, um, yeah…what was the question?”

“Vhere are you from?”

She paused again, shutting her eyes tight hoping it would give her an answer, “I…. don’t…..know…” She began to feel her chest tightening.

“Strange. Vhat is today’s date?”

“I don’t know….”

“Hm, are you sure?”

“Y-yeah,” she was still wringing her hands and shutting her eyes tight, as if that was going to bring her memory vacj.

“Last question. Do you know vhere you are?”

“…..No,” she had no hope for her memory.

“How unfortunate,” the man in the white coat writing down on his clipboard.

“C-can I ask some questions?” She asked, pinching her left temple.

The man looked up, cocking an eyebrow up, “I suppose so.”

“What is *your* name?”

“You can address me as, Dr. Maxis.”

“Ok, where are…*you* from?” She was beginning to try to prop herself up and lean against the wall. She made eye contact with her interviewer, an older man who looked to be in his 50’s, bald, with a thick white beard.

“Germany.”

“We’re in Germany?”

“Yes,” Dr. Maxis remained very direct and stiff, with no fluctuations in his voice and little body movement with exception to the occasional writing on his clipboard.

“What is today’s date?”

“October 19, 1945.”

She could not put her finger on it, but that did not seem right, “a-a-are you sure?”

“Vhy vouldn’t I be?”

She gave a small shrug and began thinking of a retort when another man in a white coat came to Dr. Maxis. They both began speaking German to one another, as she began to stand up once more, using one hand on the wall to balance herself.

“You! Young woman! What is that on your ankle?” The other balding gentleman barked at her in a posh British accent.

“Huh?” The woman responded. Before she could react, the balding man pushed her back into the ground and pulled her right trouser leg up. “What the hell are you—!”

“Tätowierung…letters J.V.” the man looked back at Dr. Maxis who sat calmly in his chair. “Do you think she came from a nearby facility?”

Maxis paused and looked at the woman, who was still being pinned by the other man’s hand. “No…it’s far to decorative. Hm, J.V., and I am assuming you do not know vhat that means, do you?” Asked Dr. Maxis.

“I don’t.”

“Vell, it is much easier zhan a serial number, so…” he wrote on his clipboard before continuing “JV is your label from now on, you vill do vell in answering to it,” Maxis said as he placed the chair back out in the hallway along with coaxing the other gentleman out, “it is best you do try to remember, ja?”  Before she could retort, the metal door closed followed by the sound of a heavy lock.

JV felt some relief with them gone, but the noises around her were nerve wracking.

If she listened hard enough, she heard talking, shouting, vehicles, electrical arcs, and the occasional sound of gunfire. It could not have been a prison; it would have been far quieter and more confined. Maybe, it is a laboratory? A factory? A small town of workers? Whatever it was, the environment dealt with electricity, people, and mechanics, and it certainly was not home.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“What a goddamn hell hole…heh…” muttered Tank. A large, violent, and intense American marine who breathed rage and patriotism. “I’ve been in worse, much worse….,” this is the 101st time he repeated this sentence to himself today. Given the chance there would be no doubt that he would kill every guard in this building, make it to the northern shore of Germany and swim across the channel to England. No doubt in his iron-clad head he could do it, but until the bars the walls were made from something softer than concrete and the door was not metal, he would have to bide his tim---

           “Halt den Mund!” Shouted the German guard outside of his door.

           “I don’t know what the fuck you just said but……fuck you,” Tank snapped back. He was laying down on his wire bedframe mattress waiting for the next event in his capture to take place. Be it injection, interrogation, or whatever trouble he could stir up with his personal guard. None of it bothered him as it all his escape plan depended on timing, just like his time with the Japanese, though the enemy was more organized here, there certainly were weaknesses.

           “Eez-vahn-nee-*hic*-tihye….Amerikan….helllLLlooOooO, I have …*hic* idea….. do you want to get out of here…heHehH *hic* Heeeh,” the drunk Russian slurred from his adjoined cell room. Tank had the ‘fortune’ of being in a cell connected with a drunk through a ceiling high, barred window.

           “Jesus Christ, for the ump-teenth FUCKING TIME! SHUT IT!!” Tank yelled back, “you wouldn’t even know how to walk down the hallway! Let alone use a rifle!”

“HALT! DEN! MUND! HUND!” the German soldier shouted through the opened viewing window of Tank’s cell door.

           “HeEeEEeeEEEY, t-th-dis-this Russian knows Siberia like back of h-hand,” he said as he stared in his palm “hallway is easy! As for rifle….eh….vwhat was I saying? Eh…fuck it” The Russian began to

           “Riiight,” Tank began throwing small pebbles at the wall from his bed. He found it funny that when he talked to himself the guard would yell, but when someone else started a conversation the guard would not say shit. Go figure. Favorite-having-kraut bastards.  

           “—und zhis is vhere our current speshimens are,” a shrill voice said from down the hall, catching Tank’s attention. “Here ve have a Russian who has been injected vith a modified compound, which SO HAPPENS to be similar to vodka…. complete coincidence, I promise.”

“Showing us off to another gullible group of yours Rich-y-tick? Alright….I’ll play along….” Tank muttered as he got up from his metal cot.

“Zhis is our Japanese man, he does not shpeak much, exshecpt some muttering, but he has proven most USEFUL in our research…shilence is golden after all.”

When the shrill voice reached Tank’s cell, he hid directly underneath the cell door’s viewing window. “Now zhis speshimen is something of a ‘challenge’ so to shpeak. He has a verrry shtrong vill! But zhat is zha best of him.” the shrill German doctor opened the viewing window “Now gentleman if you so like to view the shpeci--.” The doctor paused, whispering a soft, “vhat?”

“Is there a problem Dr. Richtofen?” A man dressed in a grey SS uniform asked.

“Oh, no no, of course not Offizier!” Richtofen was playing it cool but not seeing the American in there was more than a little worrying. “Just one moment, if you please, I vill meet vith you back in zee atrium. Wachen[1], if you could escort zhem please?” As the group began to walk up the stairs, Richtofen ripped open the cell door.

“Gotchya…” Tank breathed. The minute he saw the doctor’s white coat Tank pulled him in, slamming the door behind, leaving only him and the man that has been torturing him for a month in the same room. “A LITTLE TASTE OF YOUR OWN MEDICINE YOU FUCK!!” Tank grabbed the thin doctor’s throat pinning him to the wall with one hand, while landing a solid punch to his stomach.

Richtofen began gagging and wheezing, but not without a wide smile on his face. “You fool!” He began to cackle like a madman, but it was silenced with Tank’s fist to his face, sending him to the ground with a bloody nose. Richtofen remained unmoving but breathing.

“Alright! It’s been some time since I worked out, now…where are the keys?” Tank bent down and began searching the doctor’s pockets, as he moved on from the coat pockets to pants pockets, he felt a sharp, stinging sensation in his arm. Looking back towards Richtofen’s face there was an almost unnaturally large grin.

“Hehehe, nice try American, I appreciate zhat tumble, but it’s time for bed, schweinhund,” with a loud thud Tank fell forward followed by his raucous snoring.

           Richtofen got up, dusted himself off, licking the blood off his lips and using a handkerchief for the rest if his face.

“Just a little bit more time, heh heh, zhen….zhis vill all be vorth it.”

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[1] German: guard

[things2mustdo]

Recently there’s been a lot of talk about whether or not the media has our best interests at heart, and with more and more men awakening from the feminist matrix, it seems that the mainstream media is going the way of the dinosaur.

Donald Trump has been urging the public not to trust the mainstream media, but I’m sure that if you’re a reader of Return Of Kings, you don’t need him to tell you that. The modern mainstream media is basically the same thing as the Church was in the 1200’s—they control the flow of information, and they don’t like it when people disagree with them. In fact, if someone who disagrees with them gets popular enough, they often times resort to smear campaigns (see: smearing Roosh as a manipulative pickup artist, and Milo as a pedophile apologist).

Now, I know what you’re thinking—“I know the media doesn’t report on things, Jon, but fake news? That’s, like, intentionally lying and manipulating information, isn’t it?” Yes, sir, it is—and this is what the mainstream media, particularly CNN, has been doing ever since television became popular.

Here’s 5 examples of how CNN is, in fact, “fake news”:

1. Kicking Bernie Sanders Off-Air

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BWQcxUIYUcQ

Bernie Sanders, the unofficial leader of the socialist movement in America, recently called CNN “fake news,” before being kicked off the air. CNN tried to play this off as a “connection issue,” but anyone with a grain of common sense knows better.

Bernie: “…who is the head of Russia, and now we’re learning that there may have been discussions between Flynn and the Russians, about sanctions, before this administration took power. So this is very, very troubling, and I think the president is going to have to tell us what he’s gonna do about it.”

CNN Anchor: “So far he hasn’t said much…he was asked about Flynn on his flight to Mar-a-Lago late today…here’s how he responded:

[plays clip of Donald Trump denying obvious lie directed towards him]

CNN Anchor: “He says he hasn’t seen any of these reports. Is that a problem?”

Bernie: “Well, I don’t know, maybe he was watching CNN Fake News, what do you think?”

Bernie: [sees her offended look] “It was a joke.”

CNN Anchor: “You don’t buy what he said, obviously?”

Bernie: “Erin?”

Bernie: “Kevin, I’m not—are we on?”

CNN Anchor: “Umm, it looks like we’ve lost connection with Senator Sanders…”

Right, of course. You just happened to “lose connection,” with Senator Sanders conveniently right after he called you fake news.

2. “Racism” Is Why Adele Won Grammy

After Adele won the song of the year, record of the year, and best solo pop performance awards, it wasn’t long before CNN charged in to proclaim that “racism,” was the cause. CNN “reports”:

…”but with its racial themes and imagery, some are questioning if the project was “just too black” for Grammy voters. Kevin Powell, author of the memoir “The Education of Kevin Powell” and a forthcoming biography on rapper Tupac Shakur, thinks so. He told CNN “Beyonce’s ‘Lemonade’ made a lot of people uncomfortable, because it is so political, so spiritual, so unapologetically black, and so brutally honest about love, self-love, trust, betrayal.”

Right, because apparently Beyonce, despite being nominated for 62 Grammy awards, and winning a whopping 22 Grammy awards, is being discriminated against. In the Leftist’s delusional reality, any time a white person succeeds, it’s due to “racism,” yet any time a black person succeeds, it’s due to “overcoming insurmountable odds.”

Give me a break. Adele won the Grammy, because the panel thought her songs were better, period. This has nothing to do with racism, but apparently CNN still thinks it’s a good idea to race-bait the hell out of current events in 2017. I don’t see this changing anytime soon, either.

3. Venezuela Bans CNN For Lies

According to Fox News World, the president of Venezuela actually asked CNN to leave:

“CNN, do not get into the affairs of Venezuelans. I want CNN well away from here—outside of Venezuela. Do not put your nose in Venezuela.” -Nicolas Maduro

…and can you blame him? CNN has repeatedly shown how ridiculously biased they are, and they’ve shown how willing to lie they are, for the past year after running a gigantic smear campaign against Donald Trump.

Didn’t CNN claim that The Donald had a 3% chance of being elected president? What did they do, just poll the gender studies department at UC Berkeley? I wouldn’t be surprised if they did, because nobody in their right mind would ever accidentally come to the conclusion that our current president had a 3% chance of winning.

In fact, other independent journalists such as Mike Cernovich actually predicted that Donald would win months before the election day in November—how? Because they saw the trends. They saw that men were tired of being emasculated and having their lives ruined, they saw that we’re tired of being shamed for our whiteness, and they saw that the people of America were starting to wake up from their NWO conditioning.

4. “Our Job Is To Control Exactly What People Think.”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NoXGV4Vw-VA

Yeah, yeah—I know this one isn’t CNN, but they’re all the same to me. MSNBC, NBC, CBS, ABC, CNN, and even Fox News to an extent…they’re all just different heads on the same globalist-controlled hydra. Buckle in though, boys, because this one’s pretty bad…and it just happened days ago.

Mika Brzezinski, whose name should automatically create suspicion in the wary citizen, recently stated on MSNBC that it’s “our job,” to “control exactly what people think.” I honestly couldn’t even make this stuff up, but if you don’t believe me, you can watch it in the video above.

Mika Brzezinski: “Well, I think the dangerous edges here are that he’s trying to undermine the media, trying to make up his own facts, and it could be that while unemployment and the economy worsens, he could have undermined the messaging so much that he could control exactly what people think…and that is our job.”

No, Mika, that isn’t your job. Your job is to report the facts and let THE PEOPLE decide what to think, but if you can’t get that through your thick skull I guess we’ll just stop watching your crappy network.

5. Donald Trump Calls CNN “Fake News”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PZI0Q3LQZmo

Ah, I saved the best for last—I do love me some Donald burns. After a CNN “news reporter” tried to aggressively ask Donald a question for some odd 20 seconds, repeatedly interrupting him and interjecting his way into the conversation, Donald lost it and called him “fake news.”

And who could blame him? They spent the last 8 months doing absolutely everything within their power to completely ruin Donald Trump’s chances at winning…and yet, by the grace of God, and by the memes of Pepe, lord of Keks, the Trump train smashed its way through the entire god damn establishment…and won.

Trump: [to other reporter] “Go ahead.”

CNN Fake News: “MR. PRESIDENT SINCE YOU’RE ATTACKING US CAN YOU GIVE US A QUESTION!”

Trump: [to CNN] “No.”

Trump: [to other reporter]: “Go ahead.”

CNN Fake News: “MR. PRESIDENT ELECT! MR. PRESIDENT ELECT! SINCE YOU ARE ATTACKING OUR NEWS ORGANIZATION,”

Trump: [to CNN] “No, not you.”

Trump: [to other reporter] “Go ahead.”

CNN Fake News: “CAN YOU GIVE US A QUESTION,”

Trump: [to CNN] “Not you.”

CNN Fake News: “GIVE US A CHANCE! MR PRESIDENT”

Trump: [to CNN] “Your organization’s terrible.”

CNN Fake News: “CAN YOU GIVE US A CHANCE, JUST LET US ASK…”

Trump: [to CNN] “Your organization’s terrible.”

CNN Fake News: “LET US ASK A QUESTION, SIR! SIR!”

Trump: [to CNN] “Quiet.”

This goes on for literally 25 seconds, before Trump finally becomes visibly angry and proclaims:

Trump: [to CNN] “You are fake news.”

If the President of the United States of America thinks that CNN is fake news, I think they’re probably fake news.

Summary

In conclusion, if you still watch the mainstream media, don’t. Get your news from real news sites, like Return Of Kings, Info Wars, Gateway Pundit, Drudge Report, and Cernovich. The MSM has shown us multiple times in the past that they’re globalist whores, selling out the American public to fatten their own pockets.

I recently bought an Info Wars shirt to start wearing around in public, and the results have restored my faith in America. Everywhere I wear it, I’ve gotten complements—it’s not that often, but you’d be surprised how many men are awake, but just don’t broadcast it.

The MSM would have you believe that 99% of the American public hates Trump, but it’s really only something like 10% who hate him, and maybe 25% more who dislike him.

I usually wear Info Wars, Breitbart, and Trump apparel to the gym, because most guys who have a shredded six pack from lifting heavy ass weights are strong and masculine, and are therefore not subject to stupid social pressures that the media uses to influence you.

Do your part in spreading the good gospel of the manosphere, the alt-news, and the resurgence of America, and we’ll reclaim our country for sure. Let’s all make America great again.

https://www.returnofkings.com/165920/how-journalists-became-whores

Journalists are supposed to follow a set of rules and values called deontology. These rules say journalists should strive to be impartial, objective, and to inform their readers. We know well this is not the true nature of their activity.

Most MSM journalists today if not all are spinsters. They cherry-pick their facts and craft narratives around to steer people towards an untold yet ever-present agenda. They make up stereotypes while attacking other stereotypes, they make up ideas while attacking other ideas, as it suits the editorial line of their employer.

In the name of information, journalists create and fulfill an artificially constructed consciousness. They are paid to do so. They believe what they’re doing is normal or cool, just like the Ministry of Truth in Orwell’s 1984, where officers burn archives then forget they just destroyed records (soon to be rewritten); your average leftist journalist spins all the time, follows all the time, yet doesn’t even know he spins and follows.

A little bit of history

If you lend an ear to leftist historians, up to perhaps to age of discoveries, the West didn’t know much. Everybody were locked into their own towns and fields. Well, this is not true. Europeans had known about the Silk Road from time immemorial. Kings and the clergy had their messengers, their events, their gatherings. Individuals like Saint Bernard or Saint Thomas of Aquino were quite familiar with communicating at a distance.

It was just much slower than today—and quite of a luxury as well. Common folk had to rely on minstrels, travelers, and on their own travels. Most communication was done orally. Academics today love to point out how unreliable the bush telegraph is, but at least this communication is done naturally between common people rather than top-down from a shadowy agenda.

Also, as slow as this word-to-mouth communication was, people then did not need more: they could make a living on their own, with the insurance that they could consume it themselves or sell it. Markets tended to be stable, and whether you were a field-tiller or a craftsman, you didn’t need to know about the latest fad not to be left behind. People were also much less bored and in need of diversions. Didn’t have newspapers, didn’t need them.

Then came the printing press. What had been done by scribes secluded in monasteries became partly automatized and multiplied. Bibles were printed. Then pamphlets. By the time, Protestantism had well developed, clever princes tried to use it to their advantage, and the Catholic church counter-attacked by launching one of the most manipulative orders ever created.

More power to independent people meant chaos. Printing outside of the rigid hierarchy of the Church meant a never-ending contest of ideas, systems, tastes, experiences, and egos. The hypocritical journalists of now who chide “trolls” while sniffing their own written farts should remember that trolling appeared as a side-effect of the printing press, as it became possible to say anything remotely instead of being necessarily confrontable. Plus, trolling helps to think of things to talk about with a girl.

Nevertheless, printing what you wanted was not that simple. First, literacy was still the hallmark of a comfortable upbringing, and second, you had to be able to print. You had to know a printer, had to make a deal with him and pay him. Not to mention the dissemination of your lovely printed book. It was always possible to print in a country with virtually no censorship, then smuggle books, but who was to receive them and share them?

No matter what you had to say, you always needed to address a noble-bourgeois audience, which meant catering to fashionable topics or debates. Otherwise, your material would be simply ignored. Authors who weren’t too well-known had to rely on booksellers who conspired to arrange a discrete monopoly on over-the-counter books. Yep, the world of “culture” has always been murky, and its members believe this is a sign of their superior intelligence.

As “culture” developed, with its train of noise, untold rivalries and social parasitism, periodic journals were printed at an ever-faster pace. Eighteenth century bi-annuals were replaced by daily or weekly newspapers. Which meant a great need, not for amateur gentlemen, but for people who could write constantly. Such people would be called journalists.

The modern journalist plant

If you believe journalism is about informing the public, forget it immediately. There is no such thing as an automatic progress which just makes happen what seems desirable. If an unbiased, all-objective information seems desirable, that does not mean someone will pay for it or even manage to get it. Even the CIA Factbook was made in the first place because objective information would benefit the CIA itself, not “enlighten the masses” or whatever a leftist salesman would say.

A journalist is basically someone who is paid to write on particular issues, in a well-defined format, as his boss sees fit. A journal belongs to someone—no matter if the owner is public or private—who usually has its own aims. Whether the newspaper has to simply sell or shape the opinion, it always aims at something else than merely informing.

(Even ROK has an agenda, and I’m fine with it, because I believe it is sound and fair, but I’d never pretend I write for the sole love of truth or as if I was a disembodied soul with no consciousness of its own. Any writer having such pretenses is a hypocrite or a liar.)

Back to the nineteenth century. Newspapers were just like factories. As plant workers had to churn tangible products, journalists had to churn out impressions. They were like paid artists for the ephemeral, creating appearances that would sell, or satisfy, or infuriate—anything as long as it suited the editorial line of their employer. Journalists did not become whores. They were paid employees, to put it politely, from day one. But at least the blue collar workers had to pretense to say the truth or illuminate or whatever BS that sells.

Let’s say you were born with a high verbal IQ, a knack for writing, and some ideas. What could you do? You may consider writing books, become an intellectual, but book writing takes time and often doesn’t pay. If you can’t live like an annuitant, you must be an employee.

If you choose the written words, you have to conform to a preexisting editorial line, to a particular milieu that already existed before you did, in hope of being granted a job. Creating a journal demanded not only experience but capital as well. Can you pay a printer? Would a banker trust you if you asked him for a loan so you can start a journal?

As the nineteenth century was an epoch of exceptional growth, some people had this capital or trust, and many independent journals were formed. Many, though, were bought off, or chased away, or censored. The elite does not want you to become an influencer, unless, of course, you remain a perpetual servant of their agenda.

This is why mild conservatives are accepted as a stooge opposition, along with the alt lite, whereas those who really want to save civilization and its creators are reviled. The elites want to destroy civilization, so, their journalists, who all depend on them socially and financially, foster their agenda while lying to themselves on the nature of what they do.

So-called investigators are paid by Darth Soros to “investigate” on convenient targets while turning a blind eye on other things, like mass immigration, or upholding a mandatory narrative which rests not on truth but on pure social conformism—muh minorities r always good, muh white males r always wrong.

Perhaps the “fake news” offensive has been crafted, not only to maintain the masses into the blue pill matrix, but also to reassure the frail employees that they are serving truth and progress. Which is already dubious, as worshiping an arbitrary strand of “progress” has nothing to do with objectivity, just as the contemporary humanities are rather a Hollywood for nerds than a place of real knowledge, but you can’t ask vapid girls to get to this level.

No one writes for the sake of truth alone. Independent writers or journalists also speak of what they think relevant. They will mention XYZ facts because these are important, or, at least, ensure a modicum of success. Just like men tend to read Miyamoto Musashi quotes, not merely because he existed, but because he’s interesting.

Mainstream journalists are courtiers. They are paid by global elites to do their bidding. They work in cities just like filmmakers work in grand obscure studios—because their activity lies in creating perceptions, in shaping fashions, ideas, mottos, norms. The difference between a marketer, a journalist and a filmmaker is only of scale and means. The aim, and the bottom, is the same.

We are different, because we are bottom-up. When mainstream journalists sold their souls, we are upholding ours. The problem with this is that we’re ill-paid. The globalists and the boomers tend to concentrate all the money, and it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to witness that the non-mainstream outlets tend to all lack money. Such is the price of independence.

We ought to have our own money elsewhere, and have a lot of independent journalists around, so that autonomous individuals from our side can work or investigate and help masculine men to shape their own consciousness.

[trixcuomo]

Ally’s Angels fires back!

((It’s Flava Girl Wednesday again!! A rival to the Kaja-Cola Flava Girls? Already?? Wait, which one is the ‘good one’? Which Warcraft girl band is evil? Or, are they both morally grey... Whu-oh!))

Daily Mail Stormwind: Good evening everyone, this is the sister studio to Daily Mail Orgrimmar--or they’re our little sister? Anyway, it doesn’t matter. We have breaking news. Long-time favorite energy drink GNOMEADE has released the following statement recently after the blow out between Trixany Cuomo and Phurr of the musical band Ally’s Angels--have you seen it? Here’s a re-cap and what Kaja-Cola rival GNOMEADE had to say in response.

Daily Mail SW: GNOMEADE’s statement released as an exclusive first to the Daily Mail Stormwind is as follows:

Ally’s Angels stands for unity not only among the super-friends of the Alliance but also harmony and justice for all of Azeroth. Trixany Cuomo had no legal call to throw one of her plate greaves at Phuur--not even during a time of war between the Alliance and the Horde would Miss Cuomo have a right to throw an item at the lead singer of GNOMEADE’s premier girl-band.

Miss Cuomo’s actions were completely uncalled for and GNOMEADE will be seeking legal repercussions against Miss Cuomo, the Kaja-Cola Company, and The Kaja-Cola Flava Girls band, whatever they stand for.

But, then again, that seems to contradict with what lead singer Phuur said immediately after the incident, which wasn’t so nice and tidy. Let’s play that clip:

“I vould NEVER normally talk about someone’s racial leader... But zhis girl is supposed to be at ze peak of her career, and she’s out here throwing metal greaves... Trixany needs to know: I’m not ze fellow Hordie down ze bar at ze Wyvern’s Tail, or in trashy Silvermoon.”

Daily Mail SW: Snap! Goodness--I have friends in Goldshire who would have behaved better than these ladies, even IF someone had made a comment about their racial leader--

Phuur: *sage Draenei voice* Zhat sound clip of my voice was heavily edited. Also, I did not insult Lor’thremar, the current leader of ze Blood Elves. I insulted Kael’thas Sunstrider, who is vastly different.

Daily Mail SW: And she feels such conviction about her position too! Phuur, lead singer of GNOMEADE’s Ally’s Angels, cut me right off. I was just about to introduce you Miss Phuur and let the folks out there know we have the Ally’s Angels ladies themselves here, in studio tonight. I was going to ask if you cared to back up GNOMEADE’s evident sass in response--but you’re well on your way to greatness here with your words. Please, continue. Do you think Trixany really is all that upset about Kael’thas? Still?

Phuur: Vell, I just think ze whole vorld of Azeroth would agree. And Darenor. Kael’thas vas a fiend and a villain. He deserves to be insulted in public. Why she felt so insecure after so many years serving as a Sunfury, being faced with the inanity of her own crimes first-hand--Trixany did live through Voren’thall the Seer surrendering to the Sha’tar, did she not? I vas there in Shattrath ven it happened, no?

Daily Mail SW: Ohh, it gets even more interesting! Were you an Aldor at the time that Trixany was a Scryer?

Phuur: Vat? Are you stirring things up intentionally? No, as I said. She vas vorse zen even a Scryer. She vas a Sunfury soldier misguidedly serving under Kael’thas all those years ago!

Daily Mail SW: I thought that was what you said, but I guess my mind still would not go there? Trixany Cuomo, an evil Sunfury! Get out!

Phuur: Yes, yes!

Daily Mail SW: Man, that blows my mind all over my face. *handsome smile* Not to over-focus on Phuur, ladies. I definitely want to get the other Ally’s Angels a chance to react to this--

Ally’s Angels: *the girls nod and politely reassure the Human man interviewing*

Phuur: And more zen even zat! I saw Trixany back then, vith my own eyes--who could miss her tangerine red hairdo? I saw her valk back, ooover the bridge when Voren’thaal and ze others surrendered to ze Light. She vent right back to Kael’thas.

Daily Mail SW: You must have some memory, Phuur!

Phuur: I do! It sounds crazy, but I do! They put Trixany in jail for it later, and that’s in the record books--but it’s like she came out of the Sunspire Keep last year after her sentence, and she learned absolutely nothing.

Daily Mail SW: Hold on, *taps his Gnomish hearing device* I’ve checked with our producers. This isn’t another rumor, this is true. Trixany Cuomo did, in fact, serve prison time in Silvermoon City after the Burning Crusade in Outland. It was because she started a pro-Kael’thas riot, even after the poor fel-addicted prince died. Apparently, Trixany’s completely reformed now. Or so we think?!

Phuur: Reformed? How? She got violent ven I spoke a truth about Kael’thas. Her fractured vision of the vorld--two vorlds--zat is the fallacy.

Ally’s Angels: Gelica (Human), Phuur (Draenei), Roary (Worgen)

Daily Mail SW: Spoken like a true follower of the Light and of the great Naaru who, as we know, saved our bacon on many occasions. Gelica? Roary? Do you have anything to add to this? It must have been a traumatic experience, seeing your lead singer being attacked in this way. It was at a pretty prominent event as well, right?

Gelica: *confident Human voice* Yes. It was the Gala for the Orphans of Azeroth. I just don’t understand how this Flava Girl band can claim to be cross-faction, or even sing cross-faction songs, when their leader behaves this way. I even heard they were singing something about Malfurion when they were at your sister studio, in Orgrimmar. What right did they have to do that?

Roary: *chipper, yet gravelly Worgen voice* Oh gods, that--Looky hea, yeah? I’m a druid myself. I almost gagged hearin’ that gab. That was ‘orrific. And how is Tyrande supposed to feel? Eh? Because that’s not a kind thing to say about someone’s wife, *she sings it* ‘my Shan’dooo’? That their husband belongs to you--

Gelica: *nods agreement* I am sad for Tyrande but honestly... It kinda is about time someone wrote a love song for Malfurion. *blushes* He’s such a sweetie.

Phuur: You know, everyone secretly loves Malfurion. If anyzing, zat vas our brand, not theirs. Hrmph. Zey vent too far.

Daily Mail SW: It almost sounds like Ally’s Angels is jealous that the Flava Girls grabbed such a hot topic in one of their songs. Did I guess right? It must burn that they made a song about a prominent Alliance leader when the flagship girl-band of GNOMEADE, who is a direct rival to Kaja-Cola, and named for the Alliance itself--Ally’s Angels--failed to hit that benchmark. Care to comment on that?

Roary (Worgen), Phurr (Draenei), Gelica (Human) in their proud Alliance officer armor-slash-costumes

Ally’s Angels: *cross their legs in unison, intelligent silence*

Daily Mail SW: How about it! Did I step right into the middle of what is really a GNOMEADE versus Kaja-Cola war, ladies? Did GNOMEADE tell you to insult Kael’thas at the orphans gala? Saying that Kael’thas used to punt gnomes off the decks of the Mechanar to go flying across Area 52, and at a save-the-orphans event? I guess that is kind of a big tell, right there.

Phuur: *polishes her nails on her blue tabard*

Daily Mail SW: I suppose I should also inform you ladies that I used to be SI: 7 before I took up this gossip rag gig.

Phuur: ...No comment. Vut those do sound like ze kind of conspiracy ideas you’d get by drinking Kaja-Cola.

Gelica: Ha! Good one, Phuur...

Phuur: *smirks* Hey, ven I see it, I see it.

Daily Mail SW: Excellent come back, ladies. Now, not to be outdone by the Orgrimmar studio, would you like to sing a little something to prove your merit? That you are the best Azeroth girl band by far and would never stoop so low as to sabotage the Horde’s Flava Girls?

Phuur: Look at him. He thinks he’s so clever, but I can see he’s put us on the spot. Ladies? Shall we?

Ally’s Angels: *stand and close their eyes reverently, then sing out loud and proud*

We are Alliance (what), We're not gonna give up (what), Allies don't stop (what), Allies slay harder (what) We are Alliance (what), Together we make it (what), Ally's Angels don't stop (what), For the Alliance!

Daily Mail SW: Sexy and inspirational! Ladies and gentlemen, I don’t know who could have said it better. Except for maybe... the Kaja-Cola Flava Girls? They’re bound to prepare a rebuttal to that argument, and I don’t think it’s going to be a fluffy cross-faction song this time. This should be an exciting, entertaining year with GNOMEADE and Kaja-Cola at each other’s throats via their respective girl bands and I, for one, can’t wait for the flavorblasted fallout.

Ally’s Angels: *pump fists, cheer and high-five one another as if after a good battle. An ice cold pitcher of bright blue GNOMEADE with glasses is wheeled out on a silver cart by a trio of Gnomes in corporate blue-and-yellow suits and ties. Phuur hands a glass over to their handsome Human host and toasts her bandmates before they take coordinated, elegant sips*

Daily Mail SW: Yum! Refreshing! Well it ain’t Kaja-Cola but it’s been giving me ideas all evening *he looks over a leggy, winking Phuur*. From everyone here at the Daily Mail Stormwind, *he raises his glass* thank you, and good night!

[jpat82]

101 Ways To Kill Bucky Barnes

Trouble Brewing

Thunk!

The ax was deeply embedded in the wood target, the red and white on either side of the blade. You smirked to yourself as you turned to face Bucky, his mouth hanging slightly open as he looked from the target back to you. You took a deep breath, looking from the target back to him.

"I guess, we walk around and hang out here." Bucky said defeatedly, shoving his hands in his pockets.

"What makes you say I hit my intended target? Maybe I was purposely trying to miss it and end up hitting it dead center?" You quipped back, while it was true that you had hit the wooden target, it technically wasn't your target.

    "I guess I just assumed, most people aim for it." He slowly smiled.

    "Why don't we go back to this tower that you talked about and we hang out there." You said, reaching forward and lightly taking his hand.

Bucky pulled his phone out and sent a quick text as the two you walked toward the exit. He slid it back into his pocket, as he sighed contently. The night had just begun and the stars were slowly burning their way through the pinks and violets of the last remaining sunlight. Slowly you both reached Bucky’s bike and he handed you the helmet as he slung his leg over the machine.

Within minutes he had you both zipping through streets, lights flickered on as the night descended upon you. The air was still warm from the day, which was nice since you hadn’t brought a jacket. It wasn’t long before he pulled up to Stark Tower and into the underground garage after being waved by from the attendant.

“You live at Stark Tower?” You already knew the answer though.

“Yeah, I’ve been here for a bit after my stint in cryo. I’m looking into getting my own soon because, I just like having my own space. Here there are a lot of people coming and going.” Bucky explained as you both made it to the elevator, he pressed the button and waited some more. “Most of the guys are cool though, except Tony, he can be an ass.”

“Oh, I’ve heard my share of rumors about Tony Stark.” You chuckled as the doors rolled, Bucky motioned for you to go first and he followed you in.

“I mean, he can be okay sometimes, like he sure didn’t have to let me stay here. Then again, I’m sure Steve has a lot to do with that.” He chuckled as the elevator cab hummed into motion.

“Yeah? So tell me, what does a usual day look like for you?” You asked, you already knew the answer to a lot of that but it still gave you something to talk about on the ride.

“I mean I don’t go around saving the world like everyone else or anything, most of my day is spend out and about around the city. I don’t like feeling caged up, so I spend minimal time here.” He explained. “Plus, if I do then someone, mainly Sam, starts to push me to go to one of the meetings and I really don’t feel like going to those.”

“Oh yeah? What kind of meeting?” You asked, your brain running a millions miles on hour on his known associates.

“Mainly VA ones, and nothing wrong with that. I just don’t want to go to those. I wouldn’t have a lot in common.” He shrugged, the doors rolled open after the elevator came to a stop. Both of you exited in what looked to be a common room.

For the most part it looked like a living room with a stainless kitchen off to the side. A man was messing around in the kitchen with short dark hair and you could tell from the side profile that it was Tony Stark. You took a deep breath, a small part of hope to hell and back your back ground held firm. Cause out everyone in this tower, you knew he would be the person to look deep into you.

Tony looked up from the coffee maker and made eye contact with you, one of his brows raised as his lips pursed together.

“So Ice Bucket, is this the girl you been swooning over?” He asked point blank while point a thin wooden stir stick in your direction.

“You mean the one I told Sam about, yes. And I wasn’t swooning.” Bucky shot back, reminding you more of teenager then a grown adult.

“Nice to meet you Mr Stark.” You spoke up and walked over to shake his hand. Tony raise his other eye brow, making him look surprised by your boldness. “I’m y/n.”

“Always interested to meet one of Frozen man’s new friends.” He replied crisply. “Bucky told us you do photography.”

“I told Sam.” Bucky corrected, rubbing his brow with his thumb and forefingers.

“Yes, I do photography as well as work at the coffee shop a couple blocks over.” You giggled looking back at Bucky.

“Interesting.” He simply stated, a door opened from somewhere on your right and Tony smirked, before walking over. “Have you met Natasha?”

“No, don’t believe that I have.” You replied, your heart rate accelerating. The red head smiled as she walked over and took your hand as well. She gave you a good once over but didn’t utter a word to you.

“Bucky says you travel a lot.” Tony clipped out.

“That I do. You sound like worried parent, don’t worry mister Stark, I won’t defile your precious boy.” You jested walking back to Bucky.

“Maybe this wasn’t such a great idea.” Bucky stated, grabbing your hand. “We’ll do this another day, when Tony can behave like a normal person.”

“Good luck on that freezer burn.” Tony cracked back as he led you back the way you had come.

You weren’t going to lie to yourself, you were a bit disappointed. A part of you wanted to get to know Bucky further, the other part you of was relieved to not have to try and keep your cover. A million thoughts raced through your head as he sped you back through town, back to your apartment. You knew you would have to make your move soon, you had to stop pussy footing around and kill him right out.

———

“This girl is too squeaky clean.” Tony stated looking at the screen in front of him.

“What? You were expecting some where in her history for it to say evil secret press here?” Natasha stated while sitting on the desk.

“I dunno, but something is off about her.” Tony replied. “There have been to many attacks on Bucky lately and this girl is the only thing new.”

“I’m not arguing that, just if she has a cover, it’s a good one.” Natasha shot back. “I’ll get Clint to tail her, and I’ll find out more. If she doesn’t check out, don’t worry I’ll find it.”

Permanent tag-

@kitkatkl @octobermermaid @ajosieface @instantnoodlese @crystlblu @coffeebooksandfandom @thisismysecrethappyplace @the-wayward-robot @lokilvrr @shynara51 @fourtyninekirbygamzeegirl @loislp @savedbyimagination @bubblycypres87 @ifyousayyouloveme @courtmr @blue-cat-1989 @saharzek k @lokiodinsoninwriting

101 Ways tag-

@lokigreyvatore @jen309 @evilzinblr @fan-therapy @jessieray98 8 @creepshowzombae @emilyshurley @booksteaandrainyday @tarithenurse @wishingforahome @devilbat @helloimnewcx x @rubberduckymomma

Bucky Tag-

@ria132love @silverhart93 @yknott81 @mintzxi @hardygal69

If I missed you just let me know or if wanted to be added as a tag!

[whitleyschn33]

RWBY 7 Trailer Thoughts

So, I said I would share my thoughts on the trailer, so here they are! I’m going to start at the beginning and write down what comes to mind for each little section, but since I have seen the entire trailer a couple times now, I may jump forward to connect whatever I’m addressing to something later in the trailer. This might make things seem a bit erratic, so I apologize in advance if this comes out like a lot of rambling nonsense. That said, let’s begin!

1. We open with Ironwood narrating that these are “uncertain times” over a montage of the Kaiju Grimm attack Argus, then cuts to Ruby saying that she’s trying to do what’s best, but doesn’t know if what’s best is what’s right as we see her use her Silver eyes on the Kaiju.

I’m hoping that this line about Ruby not being sure about what’s best being what’s right implies that we’ll get some kind of fallout for the events of Argus. One of my major gripes with the V6 finale is just how dangerous their plan was for the civilians in Argus, and how the narrative so far hasn’t really acknowledged that. The first step of their plan was cutting communications in Argus – something that would have caused mass panic even if they had succeeded and got away without the military noticing in time to send out forces. That panic can and did draw Grimm, and very easily would have killed dozens to hundreds of people. They’re huntsmen and huntresses – even if what’s “best” may be getting the Relic to Atlas, that doesn’t make what they did to do so (putting the civilians of Argus in unnecessary danger) “right”. Anyway, moving on.

2. Next, we get the gang flying into Atlas, whose airspace is completely full of military airships, with Weiss saying that this isn’t right. It then transitions to a shot of Atlas above Mantle, which seems to be on fire, then to the city, then the streets, where we see Atlesian knights patrolling, and only a handful of civilians walking outside, while Blake says the city just seems awful. We see a man throwing a trashcan at a TV screen (which as far as I can tell was showing the “Atlas Broadcasting(?) Network”) while a voice asks “what can we do?” (Can someone tell me who that is? It doesn’t really sound like Oscar or Jaune, and Qrow’s new VA pulls off a much more convincing performance at the end of the trailer, so I don’t think it’s him). Cut to Ruby saying that they didn’t come this far to fail now.

So, from Weiss’s line, we know that this is not how things usually are. The military is on high alert, showing off how strong their defenses are to match the closed off borders. I would guess that this also means troops roaming the city on patrol isn’t how things used to be either. Now, from what I’ve seen, most people seem to be taking this as a sign of martial law, and that theory certainly seems likely – the man throwing the trashcan and the fires we see are all potential signs of rioting, which could be a cause and/or effect of martial law being enacted. I have to wonder if that’s only part of the story, though. Later in the trailer, we see the gang fighting Grimm on the city streets (so I assume that’s what Ruby’s line is directed at), which we know from the leaked storyboards and their clothes happens immediately after they enter Atlas. The only time we’ve seen Grimm inside kingdom walls is during the Fall, so why are they there? What if this is a recent occurrence – a sudden influx of Grimm making it past the defenses and into the city proper? That’s another explanation (or even just another reason in addition to rioting) for troops to be patrolling, and I could very easily see that becoming a vicious cycle. Grimm get in, people panic, drawing more Grimm to the area and making it more likely for them to get it, causing more attacks and more panic, and making the soldiers seem less like protectors and more like ineffective “peacekeepers”. There’s a lot more I could say about this, but let’s keep going.

3. We go back to Ironwood’s voice overlaying what seem to be two/three different fights – the fight in the city streets against the sabertooth Grimm and two different fights in a mineshaft (and yes, they’re mines, the warning signs on the walls warn of deep mineshafts) against a new type of Grimm that I’ve heard are called Centinels and later an Ice Geist. He says, “Until now, I believed it was impossible to truly turn the tides against Salem. We find ourselves in the position of needing…. A new approach. She will keep returning stronger and stronger –“ cut to the new model for Ironwood “- unless we destroy her.” Cut to Ruby saying “Tell us how we can help.”

So, the main thing of interest to me here is Ironwood. We can see from the shot of his new appearance that he’s no longer taking care of his appearance like he did in the first few volumes – the stubble from V4 has become a full grown beard, and his hair doesn’t look like it’s been combed in weeks. The guilt and paranoia that we saw budding in V4 has fully come into bloom, as evident by his lines here, the heightened defenses we saw around Atlas, and the troops patrolling the city. In V4 E11, Jacques accuses Ironwood of never trusting anyone but himself, to which Ironwood responds to “For good reason,” then immediately says, “If Oz had just listened to me from the start…” Ironwood clearly believes that the Fall of Beacon would not have happened had Oz listened to him – used his strategies. Oz’s strategies “failed”, so this reaffirmed Ironwood in thinking that he’d had the right ideas – that if he had been able to control what was happening in Beacon, he could have stopped it. So, now, he’s not taking any risks with Atlas. He’s doing everything he thinks is right to protect the kingdom, no matter how paranoid or insane it seems – closing the borders, dust embargos, potential martial law, whatever it takes to keep the kingdom “safe”. 

Now, this seems to be extending to Salem herself. If Oz was flawed about Beacon, he may be reasoning, why can’t he be wrong about Salem? Maybe there is a way – maybe the strength of Atlas *can* destroy Salem. Salem always seems to come back, maybe she’s just never been completely destroyed, and that’s what we need to try to do to fully get rid of her. Now, we know that this isn’t true, that Salem can’t be killed, can’t be destroyed, but even if Ironwood knows this (from his “believed it was impossible to turn the tides” line), he’s clearly no longer thinking straight. He no longer trusts Oz for having reasons for not simply going after her with an army, since Oz has been knocked down from his pedestal of “all-wise and powerful” with his “death”, so now he’s going to try to go about things his own way… which, from the state of Mantle? Doesn’t seem to be working amazingly well. More on that when I try to summarize my thoughts into a cohesive TLDR.

4. Cue Team RWBY jumping out of a plane into some kind of complex (my guess would be the mines/refineries at the mine site), interspersed with them fighting either the Sabertooths or the Cenitals, and title card.

So, “final” (I say that, but I’ll probably talk about them again) take on the new outfits. Ruby is still my favorite – it still looks really good, the hair is far tamer than I or anyone else thought it would be and I’m glad (though in some places, particularly the concept art that went around like a week ago, it really looks like Cinder, and I’m not sure how to feel about that), since this just gives her hair a more stylized look.

Blake is sitting at my second favorite – I think it’s a look that comes together pretty well, and the hair looks fine (I’ve seen some people complaining about how flat it looks, and I’m just here like, yeah, that happens a lot when you cut it that short, it can lose the volume it used to have). 

Now Weiss and Yang… are now kinda tied. Yang’s outfit looks better than it did in the original art for me, and I think that’s mainly because the belt breaks up the khaki a bit better in 3D, so it’s not just a great expanse of bleh (still think the jumpsuit itself is ugly as hell, but I’ll take what I can get). 

Weiss’s… is still a case where I like the aesthetic they were going for, but it doesn’t come together right. The big poofy skirt looks okay when she’s on her own (sometimes), but next to the rest of RWBY just looks so out of place and in the way and honestly a bit bland. The top half with the sleeves and gloves look… fine, but again, I wish they didn’t poof out the arms so much. The braid… still gives me really mixed feelings because it’s shorter than the concept art, but it’s still looks so thick and heavy, and adds to this unbalanced feeling I get. If it was in the back completely, instead of the side, I would be perfectly fine with it, but as it is, just throws me off. I can see what they were going for, particularly in the clip where she’s fighting a Cenital since that’s where the outfit as a whole looks best to me, but as a whole, there are too many little details that throw me off for me to really like it. Again, that might change when the first episode hits, but for now… eh. 

The title card is pretty, though.

5. Back in the city streets – Qrow comments that he was expecting things to go a lot rougher, Blake and Yang are walking away when suddenly – captured by bolos! We see Blake, Qrow, then Ruby go down, the Relic falling off on to the pavement. A man approaches, while another standing of to the side, and then picks up the Relic. End trailer.

So, first off, major kudos to the new Qrow VA – his performance is outstanding. I was worried that the transition would be jarring, but if I hadn’t known they’d put someone new in, I honestly wouldn’t have noticed. His mimicry of Qrow’s voice is exceptional.

Second, I’m fairly certain that the people that captured the team are Atlas personnel. While we can’t see much, the man in frame wears white and blue, Atlas colors, and has a fairly militaristic haircut. The other figure is either wearing white boots, has a model that hasn’t been completely rendered yet, or seems to be an android, looking at the odd pattern and shape of his feet. I’ve seen some people throwing out the idea that this is Ironwood trying to take the Relic, or Atlas trying to steal the Relic, since the man picks it up, but – guys. Really? We see Ruby talking to Ironwood earlier in this trailer. They’re still in their old clothes, this is episode one. The more likely explanation is that these guys captured them because RWBY and Co attacked a military base, stole an airship, arrived in said stolen airship, and clearly are not supposed to be here if they just suddenly appeared without the border officials being informed, and so are clearly criminals in the eyes of Atlas. So, yeah, my 5 lien are on them spending, like, 5 minutes in jail before they can get to Ironwood, where he (hopefully) reams them out a bit.

So, yeah, that’s the trailer!  No sign of Whitley, which, disappointed by not surprised. I’m gonna hold out hope for him to be in the intro, like in Volume 4. As for what I think may be happening this volume from the trailers, I expect we’ll have a heavy focus on Ironwood, his paranoia, and his relationship with Oz, and how that extends to how the inner circle has operated for the part 10/20/?? years. I also feel like the first big thing to be tackled will be the Grimm in the city. The fact that Grimm are getting in points to a huge breakdown in the kingdom’s defenses, despite the fact Ironwood seems to have ramped them up to 11. So, the question is, where are they coming from, and how are they getting in? Considering that the Centinals break out from the ground, and RWBY and Co are fighting in a mineshaft, I would say that it’s coming from a subterranean pocket of Grimm, like the ones that people of Mountain Glenn broke in on. Since we know Salem is experimenting more with Grimm, it’s possible that this Grimm outbreak is being caused by her seeing how viable it would be to launch an attack on Atlas from underground, where their defenses are at their weakest, and this is showing most prominently in the mines and the city around them/on the ground. Otherwise, it could be possible the SDC, while mining, broke into a cavern full of them. This doesn’t seem as likely, though, with the dust embargo. If the SDC isn’t able to sell overseas, then mining operations were most likely shut down temporarily. No use wasting money trying to get product that you can’t sell. It could be an old mine, though – one that had been boarded up cause Grimm, but that broke loose due to all the negativity caused by Ironwood’s new measures.

But ultimately, we’ll just have to wait and see! Once again, I’m sorry if this is a bit rambling – I have to leave any minute now, so I haven’t given this a through reread, but I want to get my thoughts out there in a timely manner for once, so I’m going to post anyway. Thank you for reading this far! What’re your thoughts on the trailer, the outfits, the potential plot? Feel free to comment below or send an ask, and I’ll talk to you all soon! Have a good day!

[katsens-writing]

Meeting the Sergeant

Summary: Bucky goes to the museum to search for answers to some questions that have been haunting him and he finds some unexpected help along the way.

Word Count: 2.3k

Content: Angst, PTSD, fluff. Let me know if I need to add anything.

A/N: This is the third story that came from what was supposed to be a simple, short and sweet meet-cute type of thing. This can be read before or after reading both Meeting the Team and Meeting the Agent. Let me know what you think! I may make more from it...

    ~

     Bucky felt a bit of unease growing in his chest as he approached the museum. He knew it was a bad idea to be here. He shouldn’t be going anywhere near the museum or any public place for that matter; he may have been proven innocent of the attack at the accords, but as far as the media was concerned, he was still a criminal. Everyone would be looking for him, especially after Steve gets back. Every fiber of his being, all of his training, was screaming at him to run, to get out of D.C. as fast as possible and to never look back, but he couldn’t do it. This museum may be his only chance to get some answers-- he had to at least try.

     He constantly had dreams and nightmares about what he had done as the Winter Soldier and about who he had been before that. He had dreams of his life before the war, dreams of things he couldn’t remember. His dreams of after the war were even worse. He always saw names and faces of people he didn’t remember meeting, in places he never recalled being. In most cases, the only thing he was certain of was that the person in question was dead and that he had killed them. The worst part though was that he didn’t remember enough of his life during and right after the war, or of his life as the Winter Soldier, to be able to tell what was real and what was an invention of his fear and guilty conscience. His most recent dreams had involved the Howling Commandos and Steve. He knew it was too risky, that he could be recognized but-- he had to know. So he went to the museum with a dark zip-up hoodie and a grey baseball cap. He was a little on edge and nervous as he walked up the steps and made his way through the crowd outside the entrance. He didn’t realize the crowd was waiting to get through security until he noticed the security guards.

     His eyes widened and his heart began to race as his eyes fell on some guards by the entrance, checking visitors as they came in. His breathing increased and he began to sweat as one guard with close-cropped grey hair looked in his direction and frowned. He quickly turned to leave but before he could, another guard he hadn’t noticed following him caught his arm. Bucky immediately tensed up, his reflexes ready to kick in--

     “Easy,” the guard muttered. “It’s ok, Sergeant. I’ve got your back.” Bucky’s eyes widened incredulously at the guard. He quickly clamped his mouth shut as they turned back toward the museum. The guard escorting Bucky looked over at the guard who had been eyeing him and gave a brief nod. The other guard’s eyes narrowed but he nodded in return before turning back to the waiting visitors. A cold sweat broke out on Buckys’ forehead and he swallowed hard. He couldn’t do anything; there were too many people around that could get hurt.

     “C’mon,” the guard spoke, leading Bucky toward the exit doors. He pulled a key card on his belt and held it up to a panel next to the door. The guard waited until he heard a click and pulled the door open. They walked through the doors and, before he could break away, the guard quickly led Bucky to an empty office to the right of the doors. He closed the door behind him and turned to Bucky, indicating a chair. Bucky ignored the gesture and silently cursed to himself. How could he have allowed himself to be caught like that?

     “What are you doing here?” the guard turned to Bucky, questioning him.

     Instinctively Bucky remained silent. He’d been interrogated many times before; he knew how this would go.

     The guard sighed. “I’m not looking to cause you any trouble, all right? I just want to know, why are you here?”

     Bucky looked up at the guard with a stubborn, narrowed gaze. “Wanted to see that museum,” he finally answered, his tone defensive with just a hint of sarcasm. “I thought that’s what it’s here for.”

     “That’s not what I meant,” the guard sighed again, pinching the bridge of his nose. He rubbed his face before turning back to Bucky. “I mean what are you doing here in D.C.? You should be lying low somewhere.”

     Bucky snorted in disbelief. “What would you know about that?”

     “More than you would think.” Bucky narrowed his eyes at the guard’s response. The guard’s gaze was steady but not challenging. “58th Pararescue. We did a lot of laying low after our missions in the deserts.”

     Bucky eyed the guard warily. The guard sat down before indicating the chair again. Bucky glanced at it quickly then back to the guard before sitting down slowly.

     “So, I’m guessing if you’re still here, it must be for something pretty important.” The guard looked at Bucky after rubbing his forehead.

     Bucky was silent for a moment. “I wanted to see the museum,’ he repeated.

     The guard looked at him, studying his face for a second, and blinked. “You wanted to see your exhibit,” he sighed, leaning back in his chair. Bucky’s gaze narrowed before he lowered his eyes without replying. “Probably the others’ too.” Bucky’s gaze quickly shot back to the guard at his words.

     “It’s coming back to you now, isn’t it?” The guard asked Bucky, tilting his head. “Your memory. And I’m guessing it’s not all good.”

     “That’s one way to put it,” Bucky replied bitterly after a moment of silence.

     “There are people who can help with that. Good people,” the guard straightened. “I have a friend at the VA hospital. He helped me through some stuff when I lost my brother. Maybe once things have settled down for you, you can look him up.” The guard rose from his seat. “In the meantime, how about we get you some answers?”

     Bucky looked up and blinked in surprise before slowly rising to join the guard. He followed him out of the office and to the right. They wove in and out of exhibits and around displays. Bucky’s brow furrowed as he saw all the different planes and space shuttle models. He looked up at the planes hanging overhead.

     I’ll have to remember to come back here sometime when I’m done running, he thought. Bucky lowered his head, turning his attention back to following the guard, and he froze.

     “Here we are,” the guard turned to Bucky and saw him standing there. He looked at his watch. “The exhibit will be pretty empty for about a half hour or so, they’ve got a demonstration for the kids on the east lawn. I’ll be at the exit if you need anything.”

     With a nod, the guard departed, but Bucky hardly noticed. He slowly approached a portrait etched in a glass panel. His lips parted in surprise at the face before him- his own face before the war. He almost didn’t believe it was him. He looked so different back then and he hadn’t even remembered what he had looked like. If it hadn’t been for the caption, he would’ve thought it was someone else. He slowly walked through the exhibit, reading through his past. He stopped when he got to a picture of him and his mother and his sisters. He remembered that the girls had driven his ma crazy that day, trying to keep their dresses clean. Of course, right after the picture was taken, they chased a cat through a mud puddle. He chuckled wistfully at the memory. He made his way over to a panel about the Howling Commandos. As he approached it, an audio recording started, with facts about the Commandos and where they had been. He listened for a minute to the narrative as it listed the locations of the different Hydra bases that they had destroyed before tuning it out. He scanned through the first panel on his old unit before moving to the next one. Glancing over it, he realized it had little facts and bits of information about the Howling Commandos. His heart rate quickened in anticipation. His eyes fell on a picture of two kids. ‘Jaqueline and Brian Falsworth’.

     Falsworth had two kids! Bucky’s stomach lurched. He felt like he was going to be sick. He quickly scanned the panel. Still not finding what he was looking for, his breathing started to increase and his heart beat rapidly, drowning out everything else. He frantically, desperately searched for any information, anything at all that could help... until his eyes fell on an old black and white video. His lips parted slightly in surprise. The video showed clips of Bucky and Steve during the war, at different camps and interviews. The sight of his best friend calmed him and his senses started to come back. Suddenly, the audio recording caught his attention again. ‘Barnes is the only Howling Commando to give his life in service of his country.’

     Bucky shut his eyes tight as a wave of relief washed over him. A single tear slipped out the corner of his eye. He lowered his head and a silent sob escaped, his body trembling. They made it. They made it home! Bucky took several deep breaths before he opened his eyes and wiped away the remaining unshed tears that had begun to form. They all made it! I didn’t--

     His thought was interrupted by the sound laughter approaching from the entrance of the exhibit. Bucky took one last look at the video before heading to the exit. When he turned the corner, he saw the guard standing there, leaning back against a wall with a mural of the Howling Commandos.

     The guard turned and looked at Bucky with a smile. “You look pretty happy for a guy who just found out he died.” Bucky smirked lightly as he approached. “Although to be fair,” the guard continued, “they are talking about removing the audio from the exhibit.”

     No. They have to keep it. Bucky thought. Bucky’s smile faded as the mural behind the guard came into full view. Following his gaze, the guard looked up at the wall behind him and pushed off it before taking a few steps away. Bucky joined him and they turned to look over it together.

     After a moment the guard glanced to the side at Bucky. “It’s something, isn’t it? Took them months to complete. They had it finished just in time for the Fourth that year.” Bucky nodded silently, his brow slightly creased. After another moment, the guard turned to face Bucky. “Did you find some answers?” he asked softly.

     Bucky turned to the guard, his eyes narrowed. “How did you recognize me? he asked suspiciously. “And don’t say it was from the news because it wasn’t.” He wasn’t sure who had done it, but all of the news stations that were still calling for his head had mysterious data breaches and any footage they had of him had been erased. I’ll have to ask that redhead about it next time I run into her, he thought. He knew he’d run into her again, eventually; he always did. Bucky blinked and turned his attention back to the guard.

     “I didn’t at first,” the guard admitted. “But I know PTSD when I see it. When Parks, that other guard, saw you...” the guard lifted his arms to waist height, splaying his fingers. “Instant fight or flight stance. As I got closer though...”

     The guard looked up at Bucky with a shrug. “My granddad was in the 86th infantry. They were on their way to the Ruhr to back up the Ninth Army. They had almost made it there when they were ambushed. Granddad and two of his buddies stayed behind while the others retreated, to give them time to get away. By the time someone had realized, they had already made it to the Ruhr and had been engaged.”

     The guard reached in his pocket and Bucky stiffened slightly. The guard noticed and paused before looking at Bucky, waiting. They locked eyes for a brief second and Bucky relaxed. The guard slowly pulled out his wallet and took out a picture before handing it to Bucky. The picture was of a soldier in an old uniform that Bucky knew all too well, with a young woman standing next to him holding a baby. “You and the Howling Commandos freed him when you took out that Hydra base in Dortmund.” The guard smiled wryly with a light chuckle. “Granddad told us all about the Howling Commandos every chance he got. He had pictures, newspaper clippings, articles, everything. Enough to start an exhibit,” the guard motioned back the way Bucky had come with a laugh. “A month before he died, Granddad got to meet Dugan again and thank him.”

     Bucky quietly handed the photo back to the guard, swallowing a lump that had formed in his throat. “Thank you,” he spoke softly, his eyes a little moist.

     The guard took the photo and put it back in his wallet before pulling out a small piece of paper. The guard looked Bucky in the eye as Bucky lifted his gaze. “You served us Sergeant Barnes. You gave up more than we will ever know. We can never repay you, but when you’re ready, at least let us try.” Bucky took the paper and saw the VA logo and the government seal with a familiar name typed below it. Bucky looked up at the guard questioningly.

     “My buddy at the hospital. He served too. He’ll take good care of you,” The guard smiled as Bucky took the paper. “Next time you want to come by, call ahead. My number’s on the back. You can come before close and take all the time you want.”

     Bucky cleared his throat and extended his hand. “Thanks. For everything, Officer...?”

     The guard smiled and took Bucky’s hand. “Riley. Sergeant James Riley. It’s an honor to meet you, Sergeant Barnes.

~

AAN (Another Author’s Note): If you are a veteran who is dealing with PTSD and other mental health issues, below are some links and numbers for resources.

Veteran’s Crisis Line: 1-800-273-8255, press 1 to talk to someone

If you are hard of hearing call 1-800-799-4889

Send a text to 838255 to connect with a VA responder

Start a confidential live chat at VeteransCrisisLine.net/Chat

If you are an active duty service member, guardsman or reservist, visit MilitaryCrisisLine.net

If you know of a veteran who is dealing with PTSD or other mental illness and want to know how to help, visit the #BeThere site.

To all our veterans: You are not alone. Thank you for your service.

[green-eyeddragonfanfiction]

War of Attrition: Chapter 2

Pairing: Bucky Barnes/Winter Soldier x Reader Summary: Best friends with Steve Rogers, renowned Howling Commando, and married to one James Buchanan Barnes, your life wasn’t perfect, but it was as close as it could possibly be in the middle of World War II. Then you fell from a train in the Alps, and everything changed. You spent nearly 70 years as a tool of Hydra alongside your beloved, though your past with him was more often than not forgotten. Steve visits an old friend then a new one. The assassination attempt on Nick Fury’s life doesn’t go as planned. Warnings: Violence, mental illness Word Count: ~3,467 A/N: Yup. Putting that gif up top because if I’m going to go for a low blow, I’m at least going to be upfront about it.

Masterlist // Book One // Book Two

Previous Chapter // Next Chapter

And just like that the video ended. The screen turned black and the next video played, back to the clips of war propaganda and the occasional recording of Peggy, Howard Stark or Colonel Phillips.

Steve got up wordlessly from his seat in the back, his poor pamphlet crushed to a pulp in his hand.

Steve left the Smithsonian as quickly as he could without drawing attention to himself. The last thing he needed right then was to be mobbed by well-meaning fans.

His feet carried him where he needed to go without even realizing it and when he finally left the maze of his mind and looked around, he was in front of the fancy care home that Peggy lived in. Steve had learned that she’d been in and out of the hospital lots over the last ten years or so, but her family finally decided that she should live somewhere they could visit and that a hospital did no favors to her health.

Peggy had Alzheimer’s and even the best treatment in the world had done little to halt the horrific progression of the disease. Some days were worse than others, but Steve had wasted enough time these last few years.

Steve Rogers was many things, but a coward he was not.

The nurses and helpers all greeted him with friendly waves. Even a few of the patients gave him cheerful hello’s. The thing about being nearly a hundred years old was that even people who regressed back to their childhood could remember him.

He knocked quietly at her door and was relieved to see she was already awake, idly watching the TV on the wall. When she turned to look at him a bright smile lit up her heavily lined face and Steve didn’t have to hide his in return.

It was a good day, it seemed.

“Steve! I didn’t know you’d be visiting. Don’t just stand around all day, come sit,” she said, voice commanding even though she sounded weak.

Peggy always sounded weak nowadays.

“I should have given you some warning. I didn’t really think about comin’ over, it just kind of happened,” Steve said sheepishly, taking a seat in the chair beside her bed. “I woulda brought you flowers.” His Brooklyn accent always seeped out when he talked to Peggy. He was allowed to be Steve Rogers around her, not Captain America.

Peggy waved a feeble hand at him and scoffed. “I’ve never been one for flowers, Steve. You know that. My grandson just replaced them yesterday anyway. I wouldn’t have said no to a glass of scotch, though,” she said with a wink.

Steve grinned and shook his head. “No way. I don’t need Nurse Shelly comin’ after me. Not after last time.”

Peggy giggled quietly, her eyes bright. “She was rather cross with you, wasn’t she?”

Steve pretended to glare at Peggy, but he was smiling just as broadly. “It was all your idea. You told me it’d be fine!”

Peggy simply smiled that secret smile of hers. “Seeing you sing and dance was worth it. Mr. Jenson across the hall can complain all he likes. I don’t regret it one bit.”

Steve laughed and sat back in his chair. “Yeah, well, I don’t plan on being on that woman’s list again if I can help it.” There was a pause, then, “I went to the Smithsonian today.”

Peggy eyed him shrewdly. “Can’t get enough of yourself, huh? Had to go and see yourself immortalized in a National exhibit?” she asked playfully, though her eyes told him she knew what he must be feeling.

Steve smiled weakly at the playful jab. “Can’t help it if I look good in ten foot high murals.”

Peggy smiled at that, a soft laugh leaving her lips. She stared at him, though, smile leaving her face after a moment. “You looked at their memorial, didn’t you?” she asked, already knowing the answer.

Steve ducked his head guiltily but Peggy only smiled knowingly. “I’m not going to yell at you, silly man. I used to do it too, you know. Back when your name was up on that wall with the two of them.”

Steve looked back up, blue eyes immeasurably sad, but Peggy was already shaking her head. “Oh no, you don’t get to feel guilty about it now, mister. What’s done it done.”

Steve pushed his bangs out of his eyes; a nervous tick he never kicked, even after nearly seventy years on ice. He couldn’t talk about them anymore. “I met a guy the other day. He was nice. Lapped him a few times in the National Mall. He’s ex-military. Para-rescue. He works at the VA now. Name’s Sam Wilson.”

Peggy smiled at him. “He seems like a nice young man.”

Steve laughed at that choice of words. He supposed that, to him and Peggy, just about any guy was a “nice young man.”

“Yeah, I s’pose he is. He asked me to visit the VA later.”

Peggy raised a wispy eyebrow at him. “And are you going to?”

Steve smiled cheekily. “Depends. Will you get Nurse Shelly to forgive me if I do?”

Peggy chuckled at that. “I think I can manage that. It might be good to go, you know. Mr. Wilson might even encourage you to leave your house for more than missions, exercise, and visiting me.”

Steve held his hands up in a defensive manner, smile attached firmly to his face. “Woah now, don’t get too crazy there, Pegs. Next you’ll tell me I need to learn how to use dating apps.”

She laughed in earnest at that; so hard Steve was worried she’d start coughing, but it seemed that wouldn’t be a problem.

The two of them sobered, though the air was still light with the remnants of smiles and laughter. He found his gaze wandering to the bedside table which was littered with pictures and letters and get well cards from friends and family.

“You should be proud of yourself, Peggy,” he said, lip quirked up at the corner.

Peggy followed his gaze, her thin hair scratching lightly against the pillow as she turned her head to look. “Mm. I have lived a life,” she said, gaze flicking to Steve. Her expression sobered a bit and Steve knew what was coming next. “My only regret is that you didn’t get to live yours.” Steve stared down at his hands and she could tell from that slight furrow in his brow that he was thinking too hard. “What is it?” she asked, that little hint of command seeping back into her voice.

“For as long as I can remember I just wanted to do what was right.” His blue eyes flicked up to Peggy, his eyes searching hers as though she had all the answers. “I guess I’m not quite sure what that is anymore.” He paused, his eyes dropping back down as he lost himself in his thoughts. “And I thought I could throw myself back in and follow orders. Serve.” He looked back up and put on that fake smile that made Peggy want to sigh. “It’s just not the same.”

Peggy huffed out a short laugh. “Always so dramatic,” she said, rolling her eyes. Steve smiled in earnest and gave a little half shrug, looking away almost guiltily. “Look,” she said seriously, “you saved the world. “We rather... mucked it up,” she said, lips quirked upward in a smile that was closer to a grimace.

Steve shook his head. “You didn’t. Knowing you helped found SHIELD is half the reason I stay.”

She made a small noise in the back of her throat and reached for Steve’s hand. He leaned forward and let her take it and quietly lamented at how weak her grip had become. “The world has changed, and none of us can go back. All we can do is our best. And sometimes the best that we can do is to- start- over,” she gasped out, interrupted by a coughing fit.

Steve dropped her hand to scramble for the pitcher of water on the small table by the window. He returned as quickly as he could and sat back down, holding it out for her to take. He reached out with his hand to get her attention and she turned to look at him, her expression changing in a way that made his his heart sink.

Like she was seeing him for the first time in seventy years.

“Steve,” she breathed, awe in her voice.

Steve stared at her, biting back a torrent of emotions. Today had been such a good day for her. They’d been talking for close to an hour.

“Yeah,” Steve said softly.

She gasped, eyes already getting watery. “You’re alive. You came back.”

Steve swallowed thickly against the threat of tears and put on the bravest face he could manage. He was sure his smile was more of a grimace, but it was the best he could do.

“Yeah, Peggy,” he said quietly, unable to speak louder without his voice breaking.

She sniffled and shook her head slightly as she stared at him. “It’s been so long. So long,” she said, tears threatening to spill in earnest now.

Steve gave her a smile that he didn’t really feel and leaned forward, voice low. “Well I couldn’t leave my best girl. Not when she owes me a dance.”

Peggy sniffled. “Did you bring (Y/N) and James with you? I still haven’t given them their wedding present,” she asked, trying to reach past Steve for the bedside table.

Steve grabbed her hand gently before she got very far and shook his head slowly. It was a really bad episode if she thought (Y/N) and Bucky were still alive. “They’re not with me right now, Pegs, but I’ll be sure to tell them you want to see them, alright?” he asked, hoping he sounded comforting and not like he was about to cry.

Peggy smiled at him like she did all those years ago and Steve felt his heart break all over again. “I’d like that very much. Those two are just the most adorable couple I’ve ever seen,” she said fondly.

Steve’s smile was fixed on his face so stiffly that he was worried it’d stay that way forever. “Yeah, they are.”

Steve did end up going to the VA.

By the time someone had come in to take care of Peggy (who’d fallen asleep shortly after her episode began. “Too much excitement,” Nurse Shelly had told him with a beady, accusing stare that sent him scurrying out the door) it was too late to make it in time to truly participate in the conversation, not that Steve was sure he could have anyway.

“Sam Wilson?” he asked the lady at the desk, who immediately went flustered and starry-eyed when she realized who he was.

She snapped a sloppy, frazzled salute to him and pointed down the hall. He gave her a polite “thank you, ma’am,” and walked leisurely in the direction she’d indicated. He could feel her eyes on his back the whole way.

The doors to the room were open and Steve leaned against the door frame, not wanting to interrupt the woman who was sharing. Sam was at the front of the room and Steve saw his eyes flick to Steve for a split second before returning to the woman. No one else seemed to realize he was there, which Steve was thankful for.

“The thing is, I think it’s getting worse. A cop pulled me over last week. He thought I was drunk. I swerved to miss a plastic bag. Thought it was an IED.” When she finished talking she looked down at her hands, missing the understanding looks the other vets were giving her.

“Some stuff you leave there,” Sam began. His voice was soothing and cut easily through the tension in the room. It was clear that this was a safe space and everyone in that room trusted Sam. “Other stuff you bring back. It’s our job to figure out how to carry it. Is it gonna be in a big suitcase, or in a little man purse? It’s up to you.”

Steve’s jaw worked as he mulled over Sam’s words. Peggy’s words from earlier bounced off his skull until there was nothing but a racket left for him to sift through.

Steve stayed and listened for the rest of the meeting, but never went and sat down. It was almost over, anyhow.

After, Sam said goodbye to some of the vets before making his way over to Steve, making busy work by reorganizing and stacking pamphlets. “Look who it is. The running man,” Sam said, throwing Steve a sly smirk over his shoulder.

Steve tucked his hands in his pockets and walked over. “Caught the last few minutes. It’s pretty intense.”

Sam nodded as he placed some cards back into the basket on the table. “Yeah, brother. We all got the same problems. Guilt, regret.” There was a tone in his voice and look in his eye that Steve knew all too well.

“You lose someone?” he asked quietly. Sam didn’t have to answer. It was a pretty personal question, after all.

But he did anyway. He nodded, eyes eventually landing on Steve though Steve could tell he wasn’t completely in the present. “My wingman, Riley. Flying a night mission. Standard PJ rescue op. Nothing we hadn’t done a thousand times before. Until an RPG knocked Riley’s dumb ass outta the sky. Nothing I could do. S’like I was up there just to watch.”

Steve’s memory flashed to that Godforsaken train in the alps. Of (Y/N) and Bucky falling mere milliseconds before he got there.

“I’m sorry,” was all he said instead.

“After that, I had a really hard time finding a reason for being over there, y’know?” he said with a weak smile.

“But you’re happy now? Back in the world?” Steve asked, nodding his head towards the large stack of papers on the table.

Sam crossed his arms and the smile on his face was a little more genuine now. “Hey, the number of people giving me orders is down to about-” he made a show of looking around, “-zero? So, hell yeah.” He was smiling in earnest now, just like he had been at the National Mall. “You thinkin’ about getting out?”

Steve stared at a spot on the table. “No,” he said quickly with a little shake of his head. Then he paused and tilted his head, considering. “I don’t know.” He smiled that melancholy smile. “To be honest, I don’t know what I would do with myself if I did.”

Sam considered that for a moment, his lips tipping down at the corners. “Ultimate fighting?” Steve laughed and Sam chuckled. “Just a great idea off the top of my head,” he said, grinning. “Seriously, you could do whatever you want to do. What makes you happy?”

Steve looked back at Sam, his lips straight in that almost-smile he wore too often these days. “I dunno.”

Your POV

The mission was simple. Assassination was simpler than extraction or escort.

One target. High value. Extremely capable. Proceed with caution.

Hydra sent out a small group of soldiers dressed as local police. Handler Pierce wanted to solve the problem without pulling you and the other Soldier into it if at all possible. You were valuable, best used in the shadows.

However, it was clear from the noise on the comms that the Hydra soldiers had failed and were in pursuit. You watched the screen in your hand, quickly tracking his most likely paths of escape.

You kicked the bike into life and shoved the tiny device back into your pocket. “Hop off when I slow you down. Grab your Mag Disc Grenade launcher,” you said by way of warning. His right arm was already around your waist so he didn’t slide back even an inch when you sped forward out of the alley. The electric engine was nearly silent, perfect for stealth operations... ignoring the fact it was broad daylight out.

You’d drop him off at one of the most likely routes of egress of your target then head to the other yourself. You’d leave the bike with the other Soldier. If the target happened to take another route, you’d pursue one foot (well, jet skates) and he’d pursue on the bike.

But you trusted your calculations.

You slowed down at the corner of one of the intersections, pulling up on the curb and ignoring the gaggle of surprised onlookers. Most of them scattered when they got one look at the guns you were packing, but some stopped and took pictures, gawking like a bunch of brain-dead monkeys. You ignored them and felt the bike shift as the Soldier hopped off, mag launcher in hand. You parked the bike on the curb, knowing there was no way in hell anyone would be stupid enough to touch it after getting a single look at you and the other Soldier.

“What about you? There’s only one,” the Soldier said, holding up his launcher as the two of you started to walk away from the bike.

You rolled your eyes even knowing he couldn’t see the gesture behind your goggles. “Shut up and do your job,” you said, grinning ferally beneath your mask as your razor-sharp wheels popped out of your feet. It the other Soldier said anything after that, it was drowned out by the roar of your twin heel jets and a half second later you were half a block away.

“I really don’t need this, you know. You should have taken it,” said his voice in your ear.

You growled your annoyance. “I don’t need it either, idiot. A high-tech car like the target’s? I can fry it with a single touch. I doubt it can outrun me in this traffic anyway. Did you plan to punch it into submission?”

The other Soldier made a noncommittal noise in the back of his throat. “Are you in position?”

You came to a stop in the middle of the street, ignoring the cars that swerved wildly to avoid you. A few drivers yelled angrily at you as they passed, but you ignored them, too. “Of course. Tell me if you get a visual. It seems like the target lost the agents that had been pursuing him. I don’t have any information no-”

“I have a visual.”

You groaned and fired your heel rockets up again and headed back to the other Soldier’s position. “I’m headed back. Status?”

“Mag grenade deployed.” There was the sound of an explosion in your headset and you were fairly sure that if you didn’t have your heel jets on you’d be able to hear the explosion and screams with your own ears. You could imagine the car flying through the air. In fact you rounded the corner just in time to watch the other Soldier sidestep the SUV, smoke wrapping around him like a cloak.

“Success. Target’s transport destroyed.”

“Finish him, then. I’ll be there in a moment with the bike and then we can return to Handler Pierce and inform him of our success.”

You watched him wrench the door off its hinges and send it flying. You left him to finish the target and grabbed the bike which, as you’d expected, had been given a wide berth. You kicked it on and rolled over to the Soldier a half-block away. You knew immediately something had gone wrong. He was stalking towards you, but his posture was all wrong.

“What happened?” you asked, looking between him and the wreck.

You heard him through both the comm and the normal way as he hopped onto the bike behind you, sitting back to back so he could watch your six while you made your escape. There was a handle on the back for the express purpose of him being able to hang on while you drove. “He used some sort of device to cut through the door of the SUV. Escaped into the sewers. Could be anywhere, especially if he has backup waiting for him.”

You glowered as you weaved through the city’s streets, cutting through traffic and dodging places you knew had cameras. “You should have chased after him.”

“We can back and you can go down the sewers in a fruitless chase for our quarry, then.” When you didn’t respond he sounded almost smug. “Didn’t think so.”

“You can tell Handler Pierce you let him get away from you, then.”

He went stiff against your back and you knew that had struck a nerve. “We still have eight hours.”

You frowned. “So it’s on me to find him again.”

There was a pause, then, “No, it’s on us.”

Next Chapter

If you’d like to be tagged in this series, like this post! Sorry, but responses to this post asking to be tagged will be ignored, so send me an ask or like one of the taglist posts!

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[luckyukhei]

Close To Heaven, Closer To Hell

warning: guns and shit

a/n: Another K-Pop band is featured in this one ;) If you enjoy their appearance maybe they’ll come again.Plus a little homage to my two previous failed mafia aus! Also shoutout to @cappletini for helping me with ideas. 

word count: 2.0k! these chapters keep getting longer!

au!: mafia!

summary: The reader is a badass stripper with secrets, a pistol named ‘Protection’, and, a taste for something, better looking than the seven soon to be mafia leaders who wandered into her strip club, revenge.

Chapter 2: Terms and Services

Rippin’ ‘Em A New One

You and the boys spent all day moving your stuff into the place you all are going to share. It was huge. The first floor held a big ass living room, kitchen, dining room. The second floor held eight rooms and four bathrooms. You haven’t even explored the basement.

Out of all those places you were seated on the couch staring at the ceiling. Your room was in between Jungkook’s and Namjoon’s. You weren’t used to the little noises you heard. Like the volume on Jungkook’s computer being a little too loud or occasionally hearing heavy footsteps walking past. All things you just needed to get used too. Which would happen but, until then you sat on the nice couch that was placed in front of a nice flat screen.

You felt the couch sink next to you and you dragged your eyes to see who it was. 

You were faced with Jin who gave you a kind smile,” Angel, what are you doing?”

“Sitting. Can’t sleep.” You answered blatantly.

“Is it the noises?” He asked tilting his head.

You gave him a nod, “What are you doing up?”

“I wanted to check on you. We’ve got a big day tomorrow.” Jin turned his body to face yours after crossing his legs.

“ Well, I’m sure you have questions, Jin. Ask and I’ll answer.” You turned to look at him.

“How are you settling?” He rested his head on the back of the couch.

“Fine.” Your home before the apartment was bigger than this and you handle change easy.

“Do you have business attire for tomorrow’s meeting?” 

“Yeah. Already picked it out. What’s it about anyway?” You were only told what to wear.

“You're meeting the gang that's taking our former place and the big guy basically.” 

You nodded quietly letting silence engulf you both.

“Angel? How do you know so much about this life?”

“I’ve been around, seen somethings...” That was all you were going to give him as you got up.

“Was that too personal? I’m sor-”  Jin stopped as you held your hand out to him.

“Walk me to my room?” You asked.

Jin nodded happily and got up. You two walked to your room in a comfortable silence. As you opened the door Jin spoke, “If you ever want to talk you can come to my room.”

“Will do.” 

You jogged down the stairs with your heels in your hands. You spent all morning looking for your favorite purse. But, you settled for the big clunky black one you happened to have. 

“Sleep late?” Hoseok asked as you slipped your heels on and grabbed something to eat.

“No- I couldn’t find my purse...” You sighed.

“We’ll look for it when we get back.” Jungkook patted your back and you nodded.

“Come on let’s go.” Namjoon nodded towards the door.

“ You look really nice, Angel.” Jin gave you a smile.

You were wearing a loose red blouse and a black pencil skirt with a matching jacket. 

“Thank you.” You gave him a smile and followed everyone else to the car.

The car ride was pretty quiet which you enjoyed. It gave you a chance to calm yourself. The conference was held in what looked to be a business building. Seven men were standing outside which prompted Jin to lean over and tell you who they were.

“That’s Neo. They’re taking our old place.” He whispered in your ear.

You watched them closely as the presumed leader opened the door for all of you. You were first but, you stepped to the side to let the boys pour out and greet their former equals. It was crowded when you came up so you were squished between two men who were pretty tall compared to you.

“Where’s Angel?” Jin asked and you raised your little hand.

The men looked down at you in chuckled as you adjusted your clunky purse to walk over to Jin.

“Sorry. You all are so tall!” You giggled and gave them a smile.

Jimin gave you a really weird look. He’s a smart one admittedly.

“This- This is your advisor?” The leader asked obviously confused.

“Angel this is the leader of Neo. Taeyong.” Namjoon told you.

You stuck your hand out. Which he ignored and went on to introduce his men.

You stuck your finger out, “Hold that thought. Namjoon, can we go ahead and go inside. I have to use the restroom.”

“Is it that urgent?” One Taeyong’s men asked.

“Lady issues. Unless you want me to go into grave detail about how my va-” You were interrupted by Namjoon.

“Yes! Angel. Come on. We’ll wait for you while you use the restroom.” He guided you and the others into the building.

He pointed you towards the bathroom then the conference room, “Go there when you’re done okay?”

You nodded, “Yes, sir.”

Once you finished your “lady business” you walked into the conference room and apologized.

You realized there were fourteen chairs, not fifteen when Jungkook got up to offer his seat. 

You shook your head, “Thank you. That’s very kind of you but, I came in late. It’s completely okay.”

Jungkook nodded slowly and sat back down.

“Please introduce your men.” You gestured to Taeyong.

“This is Mark-” Taeyong pointed to the man next to him who had brown hair.

“Jungwoo, WinWin” He pointed to one man with black hair and one with blonde.

“On the other side of me is, Doyoung, Lucas, and Jaehyun.” He gestured to the last three. The one closest to Taeyong had black hair, the next one had blonde hair, and the last had brown.

“Nice to meet you all. I’m Angel.” You were about to say something as Mark burst out in laughter. “Do you have a problem with my name?”

“No no. It’s just a shitty fake name.” He gasped out as he finally stopped laughing. 

You decided to ignore the comment and continued on, “ Can we get on to what we’re actually here for?”

You were ignored as Doyoung asked,” What did you do before you were their advisor?”

Jin spoke up, “What does that have to do with anything?”

“I was a stripper.” You answered bluntly.

They all erupted in laughter while your co-worker's faces were serious and calm.

This time Jungkook went to defend you but, Jimin grabbed his wrist,” Let her handle it.”

You gave him a nod as Taeyong spoke out, “So what? You were in the middle of giving one of them a  lap dance then bomb you got a job.”

“Funny isn’t it? That’s basically how it happened! But, that says more about you than me. All I had to do was shake my ass to Beyonce and I ended up with a higher position than you!” You let out a fake laugh.

Namjoon and Yoongi had to hold in their laughs while the rest of the boys laughed as you continued, “Now, are you done questioning me?”

“And what are you going to do if I don’t?”Taeyong asked.

“I was hoping you would ask that.” You replied quickly making your way to him and reaching in your purse,

Before anyone could react you had a pistol to his temple. His two men at the ends of the table slid their chairs back, stood, and patted themselves down looking for their weapons.

“Woah!” You heard which caused you to glance at Lucas who put his hands up.

Jin slowly stood along with Yoongi, “Angel. It’s not even that big of a de-”

“Jin. Yoongi. Do you trust me?” You interrupted. 

Jin sat down, “Yes, Angel. I trust you.” 

"What the hell?! You’re just some mystery stripper who doesn't even have a real name!-”

“Do you trust me?! YES OR NO!” You screamed.

“She has a gun to my leader’s head!” Mark yelled, “Say yes!”

Jimin shouted, “Just say yes, hyung!”

“Okay! Yes! Angel, I trust you!” Yoongi sat down.

“Good.” You took the clip out the pistol and showed them that it is completely empty before setting down the pistol and taking out the two that were owned by the two still standing men. You gestured the handle end to both of them, “Here you go. Check the clips.” 

They did before both saying,”Empty.”

You took your purse off your shoulder and split the contents out. Unused bullets spilled out on to the table before you dropped your purse. You heard the door open and everyone looked up.

“Angel this is the big boss, Sunny,” Namjoon spoke as everyone stood. But, you knew him. You knew him long before they did. Emotions filled your chest. 

You clenched your jaw, “I know him.”

“Boys, may I steal your advisor?” Sunny asked giving him a smile.

Namjoon nodded, “Of course.”

“You all can sit.” Sunny allowed them as you walked to him with your head down. 

As the door closed you closed you could barely hear Lucas say,” Anyone else scared for their life but, also really turned on?”

You looked at Sunny as he chuckled probably at Lucas but, you didn’t say anything. You just bit the inside of your mouth.

“You go by Angel these days, huh?” He asked.

“I would have to if you kept your promise.” You spat at him.

“Y/N-” You glared at him, “Angel...I tried. I really did.”

“Save it-” Your phone buzzed and you flipped it open to see a text from Ji-Su. “I’ve got to go.”

“I guess that’s good timing because your boys, formerly known as Bang, have a job.” He replied opening the door.

“Bang. You’re free to go.”Sunny started, “You’ve got a job to do. I’ll give you details when you all get suit up.”

Taeyong stood, “What about us, sir?”

“You’ll be taking Ms.Angel where ever she needs to go.” All of Neo, but Lucas, frowned at it. All the men filed out of the room nonetheless. 

Jungkook patted your head as they lined up to head the opposite way of the exit while Neo lined up behind you.

“Be careful with our girl.” Namjoon joked.

You heard a few scoffs behind you and you chuckled.

Jin gave you a smile, “Be careful, Angel. We’ll see you when we get home.”

You nodded and blew them playful kisses. Working with ‘Bang’ wasn’t going to be too hard. You turned around. Neo on the other hand?

The car ride was awkward and tense. Their vehicle was a lot like the boys. It was a big SUV with eight seats. WinWin and Taeyong sat in the front. You were in between Lucas and Mark. Then Doyoung, Jungwoo, and Jaehyun were behind you.

You turned around and they all looked down at you, “I’m sorry for taking your guns.” You turned your charm all the way up, “I don’t want you to have a bad impression of me.”

Jaehyun gave you a soft smile and leaned forward to whisper, “It’s alright.”

You gave him a smile and turned around. You leaned forward and tapped Taeyong’s shoulder. 

He turned his head to look at you,” Yes?”

“I’m sorry for pulling a gun on you.” You whispered almost like a little kid.

He gave you an almost motherly smile,” I was being a jerk. Plus it was kinda cool. Your acting skills are amazing.”

You sat back and thanked him.

“What are you doing after you drop that thing off to the salon?” Lucas asked.

“Visiting my boss. I have to pick up my final paycheck.” You answered honestly.

Taeyong gave you his number to call when you needed a ride home right before you got out and walked into Yu-Na’s salon. Mi-Na was playing when you squatted down and gave her an envelope, “Take this to your Auntie.” You kissed her forehead and left, making your way to ‘Ladies, Ladies, Ladies’. 

But, you didn’t make it there. Ji-Su waited until closing but, you didn’t come.

The boys came home late but, when Jungkook checked in your room.

You weren’t there.

[eddiefortrolls]

two guys in a gunshop five feet apart cause they’re not gay

@maritimemelancholy​‘s Luke and my Valent meet in a gunshop, full log below bc sharing is caring but here’s a highlight reel

[11:08] -- veneryAesthete [VA] If there was such a thing as a fancy looking gun shop, that's where you'd find Valent. It was definitely shinier than your run of the mill place, at least. He leans against the temporarily unmanned counter, waiting for the salesperson to return with a particular order of his, glancing up when another troll enters the store. --

[11:08] VA: Fine evening, isn't it?

[11:14] -- maritimeMelancholy [MM] had only just walked into the storeway, setting off the bell on top of the door. The immediate attention that he drew wasn't unexpected, instead causing Luke to assume that the troll greeting him must have been an employee. --

[11:15] -- maritimeMelancholy [MM] no longer had to put on a fake voice for this disguise, the mask having a decently subtle transmitter to allow him to speak with ease. --

[11:16] MM: The weather is nice.

[11:19] -- maritimeMelancholy [MM] is drawn towards the pistol section, almost always proudly displayed in the glass counter of every gun store. It meant approaching the dandy directly, but he didn't seem hostile anyway. --

[11:37] VA: vVhat are you after today, ol' sport?

[11:37] -- veneryAesthete [VA] Watches him with a wide, polite smile as he approaches the counter, following his gaze down to the pistols. --

[11:37] VA: Some self defense, is it?

[11:38] MM: Something stronger than what I've got now.

[11:38] MM: I got into a fight and wasn't very pleased with the results.

[11:39] MM: But I guess I'm here.

[11:43] VA: You vVere a better shot than the other guy, at least.

[11:43] VA: May I see?

[11:45] -- maritimeMelancholy [MM] cautiously reaches into his jacket, drawing what I would imagine to be the troll equivalent of a glock 37 semi-automatic pistol. --

[11:46] -- maritimeMelancholy [MM] doesn't hand it over, however. Just for show. --

[11:48] MM: Do you own this place?

[11:48] VA: Nothing too fancy.

[11:48] VA: /me Says vVith a smile and a nod, genuinely not intending any insult by it.

[11:48] -- veneryAesthete [VA] fuck! --

[11:48] VA: [Me]?

[11:49] VA: Oh, no. [I'm] just a customer.

[11:49] -- maritimeMelancholy [MM] nods, looking around to see if anyone else was in the store that he possibly could have been talking to. --

[11:49] MM: Oh.

[11:49] MM: You had me fooled.

[11:54] VA: [I] suppose [I'm] sort of a regular.

[11:54] VA: ...

[11:55] VA: vVell, [I'd] say [I] don't recognize your face, but... As it stands.

[11:55] -- veneryAesthete [VA] offers his hand towards the mysterious masked stranger with a disarming smile. --

[11:55] VA: [Valent Casati], at your disposal.

[11:56] -- maritimeMelancholy [MM] felt alright taking his hand after reholstering his weapon, nodding from behind the mask. An aristocratic type. That was rare, to say the least. --

[11:57] MM: Wilson.

[11:57] MM: I tend to travel around.

[12:02] -- veneryAesthete [VA] grasps firmly, even clasping momentarily with both hands. He was always pleased to meet a fellow gun enthusiast - even more so someone from near his own caste. --

[12:03] VA: Grand. [I] don't travel enough.

[12:03] VA: vVould you like [Me] to call the clerk for you? [I'm] afraid [I] sent him off on something rather time-consuming.

[12:09] MM: It doesn't really matter. I'm fine for now.

[12:09] MM: I'm still undecided as to what it is I want.

[12:11] MM: You come here a lot?

[12:11] -- maritimeMelancholy [MM] said as a means of implying that the troll before him probably had a lot of guns, and therefore a better idea. --

[12:12] VA: Frequently, but usually only for ammo. You see, [I] enjoy hunting on my estate.

[12:13] VA: Game and fovVl. But for the most part, [I] prefer to use [My] trusty scattergun.

[12:14] VA: That's vVhat [I've] got them vVorking on currently. The stock got damaged.

[12:16] MM: I see.

[12:16] MM: Never been one for that type of things.

[12:17] MM: thing*))

[12:17] MM: I typically use a rifle to hunt.

[12:18] MM: The sidearm is just for self-defense.

[12:19] VA: They have a range here, you knovV.

[12:20] VA: If you need to vVeigh your options properly, it's a good option.

[12:20] MM: Good to know.

[12:21] MM: You live nearby, then?

[12:24] VA: A bit out of tovVn, but yes. [I] prefer a bit of solitude out in the country - not really the neighbourly sort, you see.

[12:24] MM: I'd imagine not if you have land to hunt on.

[12:25] VA: NovV ol' sport, even if [I] don't travel often, [I] entertain frequently. vVhat's the point of a grand hive if you can't shovV it off a bit'.

[12:25] VA: And you?

[12:25] MM: I'm in the woods.

[12:26] MM: I have a tree hive at the base of the ranges.

[12:27] MM: As I mentioned, though, I get around.

[12:28] MM: ...Do you often find yourself in conflict?

[12:28] VA: In conflict?

[12:29] VA: [I] vVouldn't say so. Compared to other trolls [I] knovV, [I'm] under the impression [My] svVeeps on Alternia have been smoother than most.

[12:29] MM: How old are you?

[12:29] VA: Nine.

[12:30] MM: Would've thought you older.

[12:31] VA: [I] hear that rather frequently. But [I] don't believe [I'll] try to stay on-planet once becoming an adult.

[12:31] VA: And you, good chap?

[12:31] MM: I'm eleven.

[12:33] -- veneryAesthete [VA] laughs, leaning back against the counter. --

[12:33] VA: [I'm] not dealing vVith a defector here, am [I]?

[12:33] MM: Oh, right.

[12:33] MM: I forgot about that.

[12:34] -- maritimeMelancholy [MM] what troll in the world could ever forget about that? --

[12:34] -- maritimeMelancholy [MM] turns his attention back to the gun cabinet. --

[12:34] -- veneryAesthete [VA] squints a little at him before seeming to brush it off. --

[12:34] VA: vVell, it's not [My] business to tattle.

[12:34] MM: I'm here for a reason.

[12:35] MM: To...avoid sounding cliche.

[12:35] MM: I have official business.

[12:38] VA: [I] vVon't pry, Mr vVilson. vVhat you choose to do is betvVeen you and the fleet, as they say.

[12:39] MM: ...Yeah.

[12:39] MM: I have a date tonight, though.

[12:39] VA: ...

[12:39] -- maritimeMelancholy [MM] a little bragging for the fellas. --

[12:39] -- veneryAesthete [VA] glances from him to the gun counter and raises an eyebrow. --

[12:39] VA: They must be something special, hm?

[12:40] MM: Ahah.

[12:40] MM: I've never met them in person.

[12:41] MM: I just know they might be dangerous.

[12:41] MM: And...as I mentioned, my last firearm didn't have a lot of stopping power.

[12:41] MM: ...I just know how to pick them, I guess.

[12:43] VA: Hah! vVell. [I] knovV hovV that can be. The dating scene can be a bit of a jungle.

[12:43] VA: You look like you're capable of handling a bit of recoil, sport.

[12:44] -- maritimeMelancholy [MM] is unsure if that's a gun comment or a sexual comment. --

[12:44] MM: I try.

[12:45] MM: Made it to eleven sweeps, anyway.

[12:45] MM: I'm sure you're quite the bachelor.

[12:47] VA: [I] consider [Myself] eligible, sure.

[12:47] -- veneryAesthete [VA] Doesn't do anything to help clarify the potential innuendo, but then turns to face the glass counter. --

[12:48] VA: Could [I] be so bold to suggest something, Mr vVilson?

[12:49] MM: Be my guest.

[12:51] VA: If you really vVant stopping povVer, a 357 Magnum vVould be [My] reccomendation.

[12:51] -- maritimeMelancholy [MM] reaches up to scratch at his chin, but it clearly doesn't work. --

[12:53] MM: Good idea.

[12:53] MM: Only six shots to a clip, though.

[12:53] MM: I suppose that would make me nervous.

[12:54] VA: Hah! vVell, if you can empty a clip of this into someone and they're still coming for you, [I] don't knovV vVhat vVould stop them.

[12:55] MM: Fair point.

[12:56] VA: And if they're still standing after this, hopefully it vVas a good date.

[12:56] VA: Do you consider yourself a skilled pursuer, Mr vVilson?

[12:57] MM: A skilled pursuer?

[12:59] VA: A charmer?

[01:00] MM: Haha.

[01:00] MM: Well, maybe.

[01:01] MM: When the mask is off.

[01:01] MM: I did mention that I get around.

[01:03] -- veneryAesthete [VA] chuckles, shaking his head. --

[01:03] VA: [I'm] sure your date vVill go vVell. vVithout any bullets needed.

[01:04] MM: Much obliged.

[01:04] MM: I'll think about the revolver. I'm not sure if I'm ready to move in on a purchase just yet.

[01:09] VA: [I] certainly shan't pressure you into it. [I'll] leave that job to the clerk, vVhich- Ah!

[01:11] -- veneryAesthete [VA] turns towards the sound of a person moving in the back and a mousy looking troll approaches the two of them, laying down a beautiful looking shotgun onto the counter. Most remarkably is the aforementioned stock which doesn't bear any sign of damage, but a beautiful intricate pattern and his name engraved onto the side. --

[01:11] VA: vVhat an excellent cue.

[01:12] MM: Ah.

[01:12] MM: Wow.

[01:13] -- maritimeMelancholy [MM] is honestly quite impressed with the gun. --

[01:14] MM: How long have you had her?

[01:14] -- veneryAesthete [VA] looks at Wilson with a bit of a cocky grin. The grin of a man who knows he has a handsome gun. --

[01:15] -- maritimeMelancholy [MM] his is bigger --

[01:16] VA: Oh, she's [My] first. For three svVeeps novV, [I] suppose. The stock design is nevV, hovVever.

[01:17] MM: It's quite intricate.

[01:17] MM: Very well done.

[01:18] VA: [I] paid an artisan [I'm] familiar vVith to come up vVith the pattern. Anything can- and should- be made beautiful, [I] say.

[02:49] VA: You seem like a troll vVho can enjoy those finer things in life, Mr vVilson.

[02:49] MM: Well, I may live quite a humble life in comparison.

[02:50] MM: But I certainly appreciate good things when I can.

[02:54] VA: Yes, [I] thought so.

[02:56] VA: [I] pride [Myself] on having a hive that's filled to the brim vVith beautiful creations.

[02:56] VA: NovV, [I] realize that must sound rather pompous.

[02:57] MM: A connoisseur of art?

[02:57] MM: Interesting.

[02:58] MM: That's not common.

[02:59] VA: Indeed. vVhich makes it so much more revVarding to patron those talented artists that vVill still shine through.

[03:00] VA: vVould you like to drop by and see for yourself?

[03:06] MM: Hmm.

[03:06] MM: Perhaps, yes.

[03:06] MM: That sounds nice.

[03:06] MM: Assuming you aren't a killer.

[03:08] -- veneryAesthete [VA] laughs, but careful to not laugh too intensely or too awkwardly. Since that's what a killer would do. --

[03:08] MM: Perhaps some tea.

[03:09] VA: Assuming. You should make sure to bring vVhichever gun you end up choosing, to be safe.

[03:09] VA: Absolutely. Here, take [My] businesscard.

[03:10] -- veneryAesthete [VA] slips Wilson a card from his blazer pocket where his trollTag, name and adress are perfectly printed in typewriter style. --

[03:11] -- maritimeMelancholy [MM] laughs as he takes the card, admiring its purity. --

[03:11] MM: Brilliant.

[03:13] VA: The ball is in your court, Mr vVilson.

[03:13] MM: Well, perhaps I'll give you a ring after tonight.

[03:13] -- veneryAesthete [VA] Valent takes ahold of his shotgun and rests it against his shoulder, giving Wilson a two fingered salute with his free hand. --

[03:15] VA: Let's hope you can vVait until morning, eh?

[03:15] -- veneryAesthete [VA] He heads out of the store on that note with a chuckle at his own innuendo. --

[03:18] -- maritimeMelancholy [MM] takes a last glance at the card before pocketing it, moving back to his business. --

[yuseirra]

as someone who is/was doing the jumin route rn, jumin is NOTHING like eun and, honestly, barely like phan (at least i hope :V) i feel character wise phan is closer to zen. (i also think the red string connection anon was trying to make was that eun has the red hair tie and then i think in one of the bad ends jumin ties mc up with red ribbon?? i could be wrong im not that anon but) (also i havent played v route but ive seen spoilers and. his and euns stories are. distinct, to be vague.)

Before I say anything, I have to mention that I don’t have so much to talk about that game.. or at least as much as I’d like. I haven’t really seen/analyzed any of the characters in depth and I need to know those in order to, you know, lay out my thoughts about them better ;v; I do know about it to some degree but I rather get crossover ideas for games I know better ; don’t get me wrong I think mm crossovers would be cool but I feel like I’m not the best one to talk with for the idea at the moment. I was only bringing up that they have VAs that share important roles on both sides..orz

On with the ask, it really depends on how you look at them and I’m sure the anon had their reasons on thinking how they were similar too! But.. I personally feel the similarities or possible connections they have are very vague; really not enough to come up w an au that they used to be a same person for me/go along with it.. I think jumin/eun would have..countless tons of other characters that share more things in common with them than how they are with each other that could perhaps make that work better

I think I see your point but I don’t think phantom’s that close to zen either, I haven’t really gotten through any of the character routes lol but his way of talking feels really different from that of phan’s from what I’ve seen (I made an analysis post on how their ways of speech feels like in korean and korean, is a really complex language in terms of tones and degrees of politeness lol zen and phan both use banmal-casual, informal type of language- YES but personality is still.. they don’t feel similar to me) they both are pretty much a gentleman and they flirt to girls and all but like; isn’t it a different kind of flirting? I don’t know, I don’t know about zen but I thought he was a soft and sweet sort of guy and bit unsure of himself according to what I’ve seen and read and phan is an ambitious, playful guy who likes joking around but has a serious side

I’d rather see crossovers of him with kaito w magic kaito because same VA and look:

doesn’t he make the same expression phan makes/vice versa doesn’t phan make the same faces he makes ALSO SAME JOB?? they use cards?? I have no idea why people don’t talk about this and I’m not so sure but people wouldn’t compare zen to this guy in terms of personality and stuff right?? but phan and him share striking resemblances uuh yeah.. a crossover of charas doesn’t have to be obvious but I feel it makes a lot more sense and it’s more fun for it that way seeing how things are in parallel

actually I haven’t seen this show but yeah;;; just went and saw clips of it and mmm mm I think it’d be pretty fun to see some crossovers of this show and maple and unlike aria aoko is not dead ;ㅂ; maybe I’ll watch this show later because yongwoo shin.. I love when he does playful roles nng it works so well

[resbang-bookclub]

AMA Transcript: In The Silence I Hear You

Recently, @skadventuretime, @eerna (JoKay on Discord) and @amberlehcar stopped by to chat about their 2016 Resbang, In The Silence I Hear You! Here’s some of what went down:

Q: Okay, first of all thanks for single handedly getting me to finally watch YLIA lol! My question to madi is, what was the inspiration behind soul's nightmares? Because that was something I noticed was different from the source material! I mean, they were there but yours were way more nightmarish and horrifying lol! (That is absolutely a compliment by the way.) What made you go that route?

madi: ahahaha 1) You're very welcome, that anime Ruined me and one of the first things I did after watching it and Soul Eater around the same time was look for the AU, because surely it had to be a thing. When it wasn't, I was like welp, I know what I must do. As for the nightmare inspiration, it was part Soul having them in canon and part just what sort of came out of me as I wrote. It wasn't planned per se. I tended to sort of let what happened happen at those parts and just intuited nightmares there, though I did sort of intentionally have them stop as he began to open up to Maka more.

Q: I would like to know how Jo determines how many sparkles to put in an art piece for maximum heartbreak.

JoKay: Simply. I just really love sparkles and let them do whatever they want in my work.~~ BD

madi: OkAY. CAN I JUST FIRST SAY MY FAV THING ABOUT JO'S ART. Because the way she did the mirroring is incredible. Like, this is my desktop background. They go together so well:

Q: Favourite moment in the fic or about the art?

madi: I think my favorite moment was writing Soul beginning to get through his block. I ended up having a lot of fun with the over-the-top synesthetic music bits and that part was very heartfelt for me.

JoKay: Favourite moment in the fic: the hospital visiting. I wanted to illustrate it really badly and ranted to Madi like. For days. About all the ideas I've had. It was heartbreaking but colorful and vivid, and the way Madi writes the two is just.... ahhhhhIhhhHHHH

madi: And like, Jo paid attention to the little details?? ? ?? Like, his tie isnt tied there. I just threw in some little bit about how he thought his tie would be crooked since Maka wasnt there to help him and ladjglkdsfg. I forgot about it tho til I saw her art.

JoKay: You threw in so many little details that struck me and I thought "YES I WANNA MAKE THIS A PART OF THE PICTURE SOMEHOW"

Q: Care to talk a little about your process? What program do you use?

JoKay: Sure! I start off with rereading the text I want to illustrate about ten times. I die a bit and try to remember the feeling to capture it. I make a traditional pencil sketch. For the Maka picture I had to take some references of myself with a violin, which... took a long time to get right haha. Next I take a picture of the sketch and do lineart in an app called MediBang Paint on my Samsung. I choose a color palette, pick the bg color, and put down basic colors. I shade, then add multiply and overlay layers to add lighting, and this is where the final palette and overall feeling gets formed. And then, best for last, the sparkles! Which usually take 3-4 layers, depending on opacity I want.

Q: This was a difficult read (in the best way); what scene/scenes did you find most difficult to write?

madi: I ended up going back and rewriting a good chunk of the beginning third of the fic around November/December because it just wasnt getting at what I wanted, tone or writing quality-wise. I have a ~12k doc of dumped/scrapped stuff from this. /cries. But specific scene wise, hm. I agonized a bit over the hospital scene with Spirit a little, because I wanted that to hit a certain kind of helpless sadness where there is nothing you can do to fix anything.

Q: This had such emotional depth to it and lots of moving pieces of grief and accurate descriptions of guilt/grief that hit me hard. Was it hard to write something so emotional and was it as much of an emotional journey writing as it was reading?

madi: I guess, well. writing for me, and I think a lot of people, can be a very intimate look at who a person is, and I think that's where the guilt/grief came from. I tend to internalize a lot of that stuff, especially with the grief/regret/wistfulness, so I think that's where all that came from. And it's funny, it wasnt hard to write in the moment, as I was listening to a bunch of ridiculous music and yelling at/with Bones about her Resbang at the same time, but looking back I can definitely see a journey and it was as much because of the friends I made during this process as much as the act of writing. [For example], around the part where maka dusts off the piano, Bones came in with some Real Piano Experience and helped me understand what actually goes into that and how long it'd take for things to actually lose tone, etc. and I was like, heck, i didnt think about that, having not played a classical piano. Moral of the story is this is why betas are gr9. It's fucking sappy as shit, but it's true. I learned sO much about not just writing, but also life and irl shit from my betababes. Part of my Process turned out to be letting Bones throw me all sorts of cognitive dissonance shit and terrorize me with very emotional music, and then I'd mix a drink and get to it. I stg it felt like I was tripping balls when I wrote most of the music scenes, tipsy and listening to BT. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HyGf2mTP2_Y).

Q: That golden swoop in her dress on the right side is what really kills me. That exiting feeling.

madi: So fun story: Jo sent me her second piece a few days before posting and I legit teared up.

JoKay: Handkerchiefs all over the place.

madi: All. Over. I also tried to sort of avoid the awkward love triangle in the anime bc i didnt feel like it really fit SoMa. Also, this is what me and Jo's convos looked like a lot towards the end:

Q: Adverb gate time?

madi: To explain adverbgate, basically, Bones came in and 1) made me realize I overused adverbs 2) this led to me realizing oH by not using them and applying better characterization things, all is better than the first time. I told all my betas, and part of the reason I asked who I asked, [was for them] to not hold back and if they saw something they thought was off or whatever, to tell me and not worry about hurting my feelings because i was in this to improve and learn. I'd much rather have it done like this, because now I really feel like I learned a lot and got better. Bones went from the 98 edits in chap 1 or 2, to 4 [edits] in the last one. And one of them was this: http://imgur.com/R3L4S9b

Q: I wanna know Amber, what made you decide to do a VA project? It turned out so freakin well and you guys were so good T.T

JoKay: The VA was so perfect, I teared up a bit. Beautifully done.

AmberLehcar: I was an amateur voice actor on YouTube prior to joining tumblr (good luck finding anything I was in though. /cries) And I'm a competitve asshole so I was like "I'm gonna be different."

Q: Anything in particular that made you choose that specific scene to do?

AmberLehcar: I asked Madi right away what she wanted. And it wasn't even written yet when I asked lol.

madi: Like, okay, when she sent me the first clips, I was blown away because they sounded better than over half the English dubs I've seen. Yeahhh I uh, I could have been more on top of things. But I knew that scene was gonna be in there and it sounded like the kinda emotional moment that would be good for her project, so I wrote that scene out of order.

AmberLehcar: I love it, it's so good. Madi was there while Brian was recording. She's a director now :3 She heard all the ridiculousness.

madi: You guys were soooo gooood! And your puppy, ahhhh. I still have that laugh track, too.

AmberLehcar: My pup wanted to be a star. I was so nervous [that] the piano bit was so bad people would hate it. It dragged so long. In writing it works so well. Listening, though...

madi: Man, you captured the transition well tho, of him slowly finding his sound and no longer needing to hear it through her.

AmberLehcar: Playing badly and repeating playing badly is tough, dude, so I'm glad it worked nicely.

Q: Did you make a public playlist of the stuff you listened to?

madi: OhH yes, yes i did /slinks off. Not fully included on there is the copious amounts of BT and Stuntin Like Mufasa I chainsmoked: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLhw3nWRXdsh-jPe7SXHPy-NOT4-PtY1yt. I also feel obligated to note that Bones did play a p important role not only as beta, but as general conspirator/friend and writing mentor, and being free with her music trenchcoat.

Q: Jo, do you have any art/style/artist inspirations?

JoKay: Yeah! Artists that make my inspiration wander could be found on tumblr as viria, lukrecious, loish, mormoc, also IG mizymiyajima and cyarine. IRL I live for Alphonse Mucha's work.

Q: I feel like we should put an honorable mention for amanda's and zxanthe's contribution.

madi: YES, ZXANTHMANDA'S COVER OF HALLELUJAH WOUNDED ME SO PLS LET IT WOUND YOU: http://zxanthe.tumblr.com/post/157041732943/so-in-honor-of-skadventuretimes-resbang-in-the.

Q: How often do you draw, outta curiosity jo? I remember it being A Lot, but...

JoKay: Depends? If I'm not too busy with school I can make pages worth of sketches a day.

madi: Dark Jo, your sketch books are amazing.

JoKay: Madi, if you saw them, you'd change your mind. They're a hellhole of faint traces of suffering teens and stupid decisions.

Q: Are you working on anything else now Jo? What is on the Horizon?

JoKay: SfTF is the only fic in my opus! Idk I just don't feel confident to write anything else...

madi: (It is a Noragami MMA AU type deal >:))

JoKay: As for paintings... boy does The Lunar Chronicles' fandom have some stuff in store for them once I find the time. I will save up for a proper tablet soon, so that will be a new beginning for me.

madi: Man, the world isnt ready.

madi: I would also attribute this Resbang to teaching me that I apparently can't listen to tone-appropriate music while doing a scene, so that was a learning curve. I ended up with a bunch of upbeart mashups/disney rap during the sad scenes. Like this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YdSo1oY_GB4

JoKay: It was fun talking to all of you and listening to more behind-the-scenes discoveries of this great fic~

madi: I also wanna take a sec to be sappy again about everything I learned throughout this process from my partners and betas. Y'all are super swell.

Thanks to the creators for stopping by! That ends our AMA Transcripts for the Resbang season - thanks for reading and congrats to all of this year's Resbang participants :) We'll see you all in 2018!

[sejinpk]

Top 5 pre-2000 manga/anime, for the ask meme?

Thanks for the ask! I’ve read almost no manga, so this is gonna be all anime. Instead of just making a list, I thought I’d go into more detail on what I like about these shows that makes them my top 5. I actually keep going back and forth about which I like more between my #1 and #2 picks, so you can probably consider them a tie for #1.

1. Great Teacher Onizuka

Great Teacher Onizuka is easily one of the funniest things I’ve seen, whether animation, live-action, Japanese, or non-Japanese. Onizuka’s faces and the noises he makes are absolutely priceless. Uchiyamada’s (the Vice Principal) faces can be equally priceless. The English dub isn’t *good* (and they have a handful of VAs doing multiple roles), but that just adds to its charm for me in this case (I haven’t seen the Japanese dub). I like how Onizuka helps his students through their problems by teaching them how to become good people, not just good students, even though he’s not necessarily a good role model himself. I like how he views them as people, not students. I like how the show keeps its characters around, and doesn’t sideline them after they’ve had their feature episode(s), so we can see how they interact differently with each other as they grow and change.

FWIW, Urumi Kanzaki and Onizuka are tied for my favorite character from the show.

2. Belladonna of Sadness

Belladonna of Sadness (Kanashimi no Belladonna in Japanese) is an absolute visual treat. Its visuals can be incredibly surreal and metaphorical/symbolic, which I tend to find inherently interesting aesthetically. They can also be pretty psychedelic/mind-trippy at points. The movie was released in 1973, and had never had a U.S. theatrical release until last summer (apparently it had a limited screening here in 2009), when it was restored and shown in 4K. Unfortunately, no theaters in my area showed it, which is a huge shame, as I think it would’ve been incredible to see on the big screen.

I like how the movie handles misconceptions of sexuality as inherently bad: The setting of the story is feudal, so its world’s ideas about sexuality, especially for women, are incredibly limiting. The main character, Jeanne, has internalized that mindset, so she views her sexual awakening as being brought on by the devil. There’s a lot that I’m leaving out, but eventually she makes a pact with the devil, and expects to be thrown into a world of fire and darkness and evil, etc. etc. as a result, but she wakes up and it’s springtime, and it’s lush and green and vibrant. I love that way of conveying Jeanne’s misconceptions about (her own) sexuality and her realizations that her previous mindset was wrong.

Jeanne’s journey and growth and change over the course of the story is something I really enjoyed watching and found very gratifying, both emotionally and thematically/ideologically.

I feel like there’s a lot more I could say about the stuff I mentioned above, including about the movie’s source, and how that informs the movie. I’ll probably write a post about it at some point.

I should also mention that this movie is INCREDIBLY sexually explicit. It had a red band trailer, and is rated Rx on MAL (that’s the rating they give to hentai). I’ve heard it also inspired Kunihiko Ikuhara, one of my favorite anime directors, to work in anime, though I don’t think that’s something he’s confirmed.

3. Mega Man

Mega Man is the first anime I ever saw, well before I even knew what anime was. I remember getting up super early before Sunday school literally every week when I was a kid (I wanna say it was like 5 a.m.), just so I could make 110% sure I was awake when Mega Man started. Like, it was usually about an hour early, because I distinctly remember watching episodes of two other shows before Mega Man came on.

I don’t think it holds up well in terms of “objective” quality, but at the same time, I also don’t think there’s really anything bad about it. It’s a very average, typical, episodic kids’ show. The animation and (especially) art quality can vary wildly from one episode to the next. The one-liners can be pretty bad, though I have a massive tolerance for (read: love of) bad puns, so that doesn’t really bother me. XP

It’s simple fun soaked in nostalgia, but I also love some of the really silly/doofy absurdities here and there. For example, in one episode, a vampire robot created by Dr. Wily hypnotizes a human character into believing she’s a vampire robot. And she actually turns into a vampire robot somehow, even shooting lightning from her fangs. XD In that same episode, Dr. Wily creates a werewolf robot that actually transforms based on moonlight. In another episode, a robot dinosaur lays an egg, which hatches. And in yet another episode, there are lion men who shoot eye beams that turn humans into lion people.

This isn’t the case anymore, but when I was a kid, my favorite episode was the one where Mega Man X, Vile, and Spark Mandrill from the Mega Man X video game make an appearance. As a kid, the Mega Man X games (at that point it was just the first three on Super Nintendo) were my favorite, so I thought that the episode with Mega Man X was the best thing ever. :’D I still want a full-fledged Mega Man X cartoon/anime, preferably based on the earlier games (up through X4 at the latest).

My favorite bad robot used to be Elec Man, because I thought he looked really cool, and also Vile and Spark Mandrill when they had their one-off appearance. More recently (yes, I do still re-watch this show from time to time), I’ve come to really like Proto Man. In general I enjoy his attitude, and I find it amusing that he compliments Mega Man from time to time. I’ve also come to like Roll quite a bit.

4. Yu Yu Hakusho

Of the really long-running (70 to 80+ episodes) shounen stuff I’ve seen, Yu Yu Hakusho is easily my favorite. I love the English dub (I’ve never seen it in Japanese), as well as the English-dubbed versions of the OPs and EDs (man, I miss when companies did that). I really like how much character work and moments there are in the relationships between characters. For a show that has the oft-used theme of friendship that so many shounen shows have, I like how Yu Yu Hakusho handles it, where it’s not just characters supporting each other, but it actually feels a bit more…real? Like, I can easily see these characters hanging out or interacting in very normal circumstances. It’s not just, “Yeah, you can do it! Keep going!”

These are the relationships that have stuck out to me the most:

Yuusuke and Kuwabara

Yuusuke and Keiko (mainly in the 4th season)

Yuusuke and Genkai

Yuusuke and Younger Toguro

Genkai and Younger Toguro

Yuusuke and Raizen

Kuwabara and Shizuru

Kurama and Yomi

There are just so many good moments, too. Some of my favorites are Genkai’s “final” words to Yuusuke in season 2 about having to fight with time to find your place in the world; the stuff between Genkai and Younger Toguro (especially in Spirit World) and their backstory; the stuff between Yuusuke and Keiko before he leaves for Demon World in season 4; Sensui’s final moments; the stuff between Yuusuke and Raizen.

I love how the characters all have such distinct voices and perspectives. Like, Genkai’s views of Toguro, what he did, and why he did it are different than Toguro’s views of those things, and both characters’ views of their own past and present are surprisingly nuanced and complex, given the rather limited screentime those things get. And I love how they both, in their own way, sort of become surrogate parents to Yuusuke. And then, at the end of the series, he also has Raizen, and I love the dynamic the two of them have.

I think maybe the best I can explain what I like so much about Yu Yu Hakusho is that it has the fun stuff that a lot of shounen shows have, the fighting and the superpowers and overall energetic tone, but it also has a lot of meat under the surface, and that meat is woven throughout practically all of the character work in the series, which I think is part of what makes the character interactions and friendship themes in the show seem more real and true to life, somehow, than many of the other shounen shows I’ve seen (I think the English dub helps with this a lot, too).

For a long time, Kurama was one of my absolute favorite anime characters because he embodies what I think is sort of the pinnacle of humanity: he has great intelligence, wisdom, and logical abilities, but he also has tremendous warmth, empathy, and caring. And he sort of uses them to augment one another, like a synthesis/harmonization of these two general aspects that we all have.

5. Princess Mononoke

(Sorry there’s no video here. I couldn’t find an AMV I liked, I can’t think of a particular clip that would be fitting, and I wasn’t too fond of the movie’s trailer, either.)

It’s been a long time since I last watched Princess Mononoke, so this entry is shorter and less detailed and/or in-depth than some of the others.

Generally speaking, I like how the man vs. nature theme is handled. It wasn’t simply man = bad, nature = good. Both sides are given depth and nuance. Further, I like how the nature side is depicted as such, where the animal gods behave more…beastly? animal-like?, if that makes sense.Like, I’m thinking of the way that Moro talked to Ashitaka the night after he’s saved by the Forest Spirit. Nature isn’t humanized, but it’s still presented in a way that you can empathize and sympathize with it.

I like how the movie doesn’t sugar coat anything, as well as how the ending doesn’t tie everything up nice and neat with a bow. The way it ended felt very realistic, which I thought was very much in keeping with the movie’s overall approach.

Honorable mentions:

-Revolutionary Girl Utena

-Serial Experiments Lain

-Neon Genesis Evangelion

-The Vision of Escaflowne

These aren’t actually “honorable mentions,”but I couldn’t think of a succinct way to put it. Rather, the first three of the abovetitles are shows that I feel like, based on my first viewing, if I understoodthem better, could very likely have made it into the list. I think this isespecially true for Revolutionary Girl Utena, based on my first viewing, as well as things I’vecome to understand in retrospect about both the show and itswriter/director/original creator, Ikuhara. As for The Vision of Escaflowne, I’m currently watching it, though I’m only seven episodes in.

Again, thanks for the ask! I had a lot of fun writing this! :)

[pafsins2]

Everything Wrong AND Right With Act Your Age

Here's the one you've all been waiting for. This episode is half of why I started doing Wins, to show a fairer viewpoint compared to my rather salty sins. Speaking of salty sins, let's start.

SINS:

1.This is the final episode in both orders with the normal theme song, and it's used on the most divisive episode of the series.

2.Let's get this out of the way: This is “PHINBELAAAAA!!”: The Episode.

3.Fake out

4.I see they randomly got a budget increase since Tri Stone Area.

5.”We're the co-creators' You can't BOTH be CO creators.

6.If we weren't watching it, we wouldn't have heard you say that.

7.Funny but you did the Perry girlfriend joke in Nerds of a Feather.

8.Do we need this intro when all the other episodes akin to this didn't?

9.The designs suck even though they are exactly as they tend to be like.

10.Only one invention is a sin even the plot is done in a way that has it make sense for there to nly be one small one.

11.They joke about it but the deep voice fits better for an older Baljeet.

12.”Since I've already graduated and been accepted as a professer” Exposition.

13.Buford has an Egorapter haircut.

14.Candace only has this cameo.

15.So with her help, we can send innocent people to jail without evidence? Yay!

16.This reminds me, we never see Jeremy or Stacy. Not seeing them will hopefully not be an issue again.

17.I'll have to kinda of agree with one thing: You could have done the Phinbella side of this story in the present to have a better narrative about them, I guess.

18.Fairly sure I've seen the picking schools conflict in some Disney Sitcoms, making it even more a sin.

19....Irving works for OWCA in the future. Details, now.

20.The others at least tried to change their voices. Jack does not.

21.”I thought he had given up his evil ways when we placed him as a high school science teacher” No, he decided it himself. Yeah, even when they foreshadowing it clear's him changing in the finale was a last minute idea.

22.”He's gone to a better place” He's not actually dead, moving on.

23.Carl dials only 7 numbers,  but  when making a call from the US to The French Polynesia you would have to dial 12 numbers.

24.”Tristate State” Redundancy.

25.”I am so in the friend zone there” Friend Zone.

26.”She changed her eyeballs' Baljeet is good at P&F Sins.

27.”We are guys, we do not talk about feelings” Didn't you want to talk about your feelings back in Hide and Seek?

28.Perry looks exactly the same 10 yeas later and Doof only has different colored hair. They must have aged reaaaly badly between now and Qauntum Bogaloo.

29.Then what is that big contraption?

30.Doof wants to feel the misery of a mid life critis because unlike most people he's not in one. Huh, that's kinda like he wanted to feel the misery of hating Christmas as most people like him do.

31.”Maniup the wha”-That's not at all racist.

32.First boys don't talk about feelings, now the girls are manipulating their men. At least their equal opportunity?

33.Also, THEY SINK BUEET 0/10 WORST EPISODE EVER

34.Some VA's are changed some stay, it's weird.

35.Well, okay now it's REALLY equal opportunity with Baljeet doing it to.

36.Spoilers,nothing comes of this subplot so it's pointless.

37.”We're- girls, it's what we do” Sigh.

38.Perhaps just telling them to do love stuff would be easier

39.Doof isn't forced to pay for the wrecked car.

40.Mishi vanishing makes this bit even more of a sin.

41.Isabella's mom has aged well in 10 years.

42.Cheese romance song

43.The soundtrack version leaves in some dialouge.

44.This is sad and all but maybe you should have just flat out told him before giving up. You know, like you did that one time before the writers- I mean the sprayer thing erased your memory of it.

45.And wait, Isabella gave up and stopped hanging out with them? A little dick-ish to be honest.

46.Phineas sounds roughly fine in most of the episode, but when he sings he's just Vincent Martella.

47.Clip Show.

48.”And now our endless summer is finally coming to an end” Finale-shadowing.

“They would have called us Phinebella” ...+5

53.Teen Isabella is standing on Tween Isabella's foot.

54.They get rid of Candace for this episode, just do the same shitck with Doof getting rid of the stuff.

55.Well, that Doof plot ended abruptly.

56.Just like Isabella's Mom, Linda and Lawrence aged too well.

57.”Watcha doin'?” Boooo.

58.For a Phinbella episode, they don't interact until the very end. And it's slightly rushed, almost like this should have been a special or something.

59.Phineas starts having a thing for Isabella right when she gives up, what cruel irony.

60.Using a Christmas song for the background music.

61. I heard this scene reveals Ferb's full name. Oh man what  is i-”Hey Ferbs” ….............Really.

62.Okay, it's bad enough Montessa went unresolved but they randomly threw it all away just to put her with Ferb thus making all that pointless. I've been joking around but I legit hate this.

63.Vanessa's car only has two seats but when it pulls up next to Isabella it has a third one.

64.They were able to show the lips touching in at2d but not now?

65.Isabella rolls down the window but in the next shot it's rolled up.

66.Abrupt ending to the main episode.

67.”It's just a cartoon' If only both sides of the base on this episode got that.

68.Milly is misspelled as “Millie”

69.Here's a sin for this episode turning most of the fanbase  into dumb idiots. Over a show that had an episode all about how dumb fan wars are.

EPISODE SIN TALLY: 69 (OH COME ON)

SENTENCE:Sick with Salmonella.

...Well, there you go. That's a lot of sins, even for a 22 minute episode. Look, this kind of episode lends itself to sins, okay? Besides, some mock some nitpicking I've seen. But dang, that's more sins than Mission Marvel had. But anyway, hope this side of the base is happy.

Now to please the other side.

WINS:

1.Since this is the last time we see the theme, better point it out as a way.

2.I like the book end with Dan and Swampy, nicely sets things up.

3.”Are we ever going to see Perry the Platypus get a girlfriend?” “No' Nice.

4.You know what? I'm gonna win the concept. Seeing the future with them as teens is cool.

5.Neat invention. Oh hey look there's them building a thing, according to the critics they never do that in this episode.

6.Them being able to be in this many schools makes perfect sense.

7.The fake out with Baljeet's voice is funny

8.Buford as a pretentious film maker is amazing.

9.Candace working in law? Very fitting.

10.The conflict of Phineas having to pick a school is nice.

11.Okay, here's a story: Dan found some nice fan artists and they figured any teens desins they made would just look like hers. So they actually brought her over to do the designs officially, and now she's working on Milo Murphy's Law. Her name is Ashley Simpson and she is a win.

12.I'll defend the future thing to an extent. Some aspects of it add further tension with Isabella going off to school as he realizes this, adding a ticking clock. Plus the deeper romance stuff would have been weird as kids. Could have this still been done in the present? Yes, but I could why the writers thought this was the better move.

13.Irving for OWCA is just awesome. Weirdly fits him too.

14.Carl being the major is nice.

15.It's nice that Monogram is having a good time in retirement.

16.It's interesting how they avoided having Perry interact with the boys, to make it ambitious if they found it by this time.

17.Great lampshading hanging of the eyes in hearts thing.

18.DOOFENSHMIRTZ MMMM  INCORPERATED.

19.I enjoy the Doof plot. First, in concept it's great. Doof actually WANTS a mid life crisi because he actually feels okay. Nice.

20.Also, awesome Doof is awesome.

21.KAZOO SOLO.

22. Baljeet ending up with Ginger is nice evenifbufordwouldhaveeenbetter

23.Fun Fact: Teen Ginger is voiced is voiced by Minga Na. Her voicing Ginger's Mom is fitting enough but she is Michaela Zee's mother in real life.

24.I like the subplot with them trying to get them together. It's pointless but amusing enough.

25.”It is how we love” D'aww.

26.Some funny Doof stuff here.

27.This subplot also gives us the “Doof gets rid of invention” thing which is cool.

28.”We have this sign” Nice.

29.Ginger being jealous of Mishit is amusing.

30.I'll admit it: I really like “What Might Have Been”. Infact, it's the main reason I like the episode. It's very emotional and it sounds really really nice. The emotion is so powerful that you'd have to be a heartless monster not to be sucked in at this point at least due to the effort.

31.This adds a nice tragedy to the whole thing with Isabella having given up and Phineas wondering if he wasted his time on the big ideas. The latter is odd but it's nice in terms of adding tragedy.

32.Leave it these guys to use a fan term in order to rhyme with Samonella.

33.Buford in diaper is a funny visual callback.

34.The Jump instructor pushing Doof is a win.

35.This Lawrence cameo is amazing.

36.Hey, even in the future Paul gets work!

37.”Watcha' doin” Nice.

38.This scene is too nice to dislike.

39.You have no idea how much I love that his full name is just Ferbs

40.Ugh, I guess this a win for Ferbnessa fans. Still not happy about it.

41.If any Phinbella kiss has to be a win, it's gotta be this one. Frankly, I'm glad we got any resolution to them at all. A flawed something is better than nothing.

42.”Well,, that was worth the wait” Agreed.

43.”It's a sweet episode” Yep.

44.Swampy crying is hilarious but weirdly sweet if you know how passionate they were about this.

45.We got hear that nice song in the credits.

46. Swampy still crying is hilarious.

47.One final statement. Yes, this episode is flawed but overall  I think it is good. I'm glad the shippers got their episode, even with all the hyped they caused over it. It's very clear from the behind the scenes stuff that they did put plenty of effort into this and really loved it and  I can't take that away from them. The episode was nice enough but seeing what it means to the creators makes it even nicer. It's a win.

EPISODE WIN TALLY: 47

REWARD: A kiss. (“That was worth the wait”)

Yeah, decent amount. That's more than Clip O Rama and both parts of Where's Perry separately, 2 eps I like more. Weird. I would win most of this stuff no matter what, I mostly was being honest and not just being too nice, hopefully. I do truly like this one fine. If only for what it means to the crew.

Well.....we're almost done. Next one is the finale, than that owca thing. Holy crap. So close. Monday is LDOS but first, some extra stuff. Some wins on the weekend but tomorrow....well, tomorrow is special, you'll see.

Goodbye until then.

[thepodreviews]

THE TOP 20 ALBUMS OF 2016

20. clipping. - Splendor & Misery

“Shoulda made the noose a little tighter cuz there ain’t nobody dead just some motherfucking riders”

Concept albums are tricky to pull off. You can either end up with a Ziggy Stardust, or with Drones. In this case, noise rap trio clipping. ended up with something totally unique. The album tells an afrofuturistic story dealing with the aftermath of a slave rebellion on a cargo ship lost deep in space. That’s all i’m willing to reveal about the story, because this is an album that has to be experienced firsthand. Frontman Daveed Diggs showcases his chops not only as an MC, but also as a fantastic storyteller, complimented perfectly by the cold, eerie electronics, which help give the album a really unsettling feel. Do not let this album slip by.

19. Weezer - The White Album

“If I was king of the world, you’d be my girl, you wouldn’t have to shed a single tear”

With an incredible return to form, Weezer make me almost want to forgive everything since the Green Album. From the moment the chorus exploded in California Kids, I knew the old Weezer I loved had finally returned. Everything that made them great is back in full force here. The clever lyrics, the catchy melodies, and of course, Rivers Cuomo shredding like nobody’s business. Here's hoping they keep it up.

18. The Body & Full of Hell - One Day You Will Ache Like I Ache

  This is, by far, the single most intense musical experience I had this year. Fresh off the heels of their equally intense collaboration with Merzbow in 2014, Full of Hell joins forces with sludge metal act The Body to deliver something even more hellish and abrasive. This album effortlessly combines droning guitars, harsh noise and some incredible screamed vocals to create an overwhelming and oppressive atmosphere that makes listening to it all the way through a punishing, but ultimately rewarding experience. Definitely not one for the faint of heart.

17. The Avalanches - Wildflower

“I just want to know, what’s wrong with me? Being in love with you.”

The one nobody ever thought was ever gonna happen. After 16 years (16 years!), the legendary Avalanches finally came out of their hiding hole and delivered one of the most fun albums i've heard in a long while. The Australian trio blend together samples and, for the first time, guest appearances by the likes of Danny Brown, DOOM, Ariel Pink and even Biz Markie to create the musical equivalent of pure, unbriddled joy. This is an album to lose yourself and get lost in, while never losing a smile on your face. Welcome back guys. Now please stick around a little longer this time.

16. YG - Still Brazy

“I really got something to say: I’m the only one to make out the west without Dre”

It’s rare when an artist completely manages to change my expectations on them. YG, however managed to do this with just the first song on this album. By swithing over DJ Mustard´s boring, repetitive sound in favor of a classic West Coast G-Funk influence, the Compton rapper completely won me over. But it’s not just the production that shines in this record, but rather YG himself. He constantly switches from topic to topic, including race, politics, police brutality, even getting autobiographical in some tracks, but never does he sound like he doesn’t know what he’s talking about. All throughout the album he proves to have enough charisma and self-confidence for the listener to buy every single word he’s saying. Who even needs DJ Mustard anyways?

15. Mitski - Puberty 2

“Your mother wouldn’t approve of how my mother raised me, but I do, I think I do”

This is an airing of grievances in musical form. Very few times before has a howling guitar expressed such frustration and anger, but at the same time, such deep sadness. Mitski’s voice carries the album from moments of tenderness to those of visceral bitterweet emotion, all of them carrying the same weight and never pulling any punches, wether they be quiet or loud. And in that same bittersweet emotion, there’s always a tiny, hopeful sensation that somehow, maybe, just maybe, it’s all gonna work out in the end. Just maybe.

14. Vektor - Terminal Redux

“I think I’m losing my mind”

This is the second concept album on this list, and coincidentally, it’s also (partly) about space. But if Splendor & Misery was subtle and understated, Terminal Redux is the complete opposite. This is thrash metal taken to the extreme. From the opening seconds, the album hits the ground running and never slows down once, building towards an absolutely massive climax. The entire band brings their A-game, from the furious shredding and riffing of the guitars, to the machine gun drumming, including lead singer’s David DiSanto’s fantastic vocals. What truly amazes me about this album is the fact that, despite being so long, with various tracks reaching well beyond the 7 minute mark, it never feels tiring or repetitive. The band somehow manages to be constantly inventive and engaging throughout, including some unorthodox elements, for example the choir in the opening track. And that’s not even taking into account the album’s story, which is so insane I won’t even try to describe it. It’s an album you have to experience firsthand. Just sit down and enjoy the ride. 

13. KA - Honor Killed the Samurai

“I plea to treat all just. To get what we need, we did what we must”

This might be the most bleak album of the year. Most of the songs lack a definite beat or rhythm. The instrumentals are grimy, cold, and gloomy. But KA ties it all together with some the most poetic and dense lyrics I think I’ve ever heard. The Brownsville rapper is introspective and philosophical, soundind like a weathered voice of wisdom who has lived through countless tragedies and has seen how the world around him corrupts those around him. Although his voice never rises above a grizzly monotone, he conveys the pain all of this has caused him masterfully. It’s not the usual hip hop, but it’s one of the best.

12. Preoccupations - Preoccupations

“You don’t need to say sorry for all the times when everything fell through”

The band formerly known as Viet Cong ditched nearly everything that characterized their 2015 project (the speed, the controlled sonic chaos, even the name), but they’re still inequivocally themselves. In choosing to make a slower and more reflexive album, they made moments like the long, washed-out ending to the 10-minute epic Memory make sense, instead of making it boring. Every single moment is filled with a profound feeling of loneliness that resonates in every note played by the band, and in Matt Flegel’s smoke cloud of a voice. But in the end, it all contributes to what is ultimately an incredibly mesmerizing and hypnotizing experience, and it serves to prove that order and control can hit just as hard as noise and chaos.

11. Angel Olsen - MY WOMAN

“Was it me you were thinking of? All the time when you thought of me”

Angel Olsen’s ode to, in her own words, “the complicated mess of being a woman” has a certain aura of sadness all throughout. It’s the sadness of someone who has been through just too much. Wether it’s about family, love, unfaithfulness, or unreachable standards, the end is still that same sadness. Olsen, talking from the perspective of someone who clearly knows this all too well, pours her heart and soul over this album, and it shows in the amount of sheer emotion that is put on display in the heartbreaking lyrics, or even just in her delivery of said lyrics. A single cracking of the voice carries more feeling than certain artists only hope to achieve. Sometimes the most emotional moments don’t even have any words, like in the explosive and pained climax of Shut Up Kiss Me. However, all of this emotion doesn’t alienate, but instead does the contrary, inspiring a deep sympathy that makes you come back again and again, even if you don’t share those feelings. And in the end, that is what all good music must aspire to do. 

10. Nicolas Jaar - Sirens 

“No hay que ver el futuro para saber lo que va a pasar”

A protest can come in many shapes and sizes. Some of them are loud and ensure that they are heard by everyone, while others are quiet and preach to whoever will hear. To chilean producer Nicolas Jaar, this concept is nothing new. Jaar, who specializes in quiet, understaded music, produced a more subtle kind of protest. Instead of dropping anvils left and right and hitting you over the head with his message, he instead talks in abstract ideas and concepts, that at first appear to be vaguely related, if at all. But then it all comes together and he lets that moment of realisation do all the talking. He even lets his signature soundscapes contribute to the mood and message of the album. It combines and contrasts many sounds, textures, instruments, even singing styles to create something unique, that’s sometimes rhythmic, sometimes hectic and formless, but always carrying the same haunting message. 

9. King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard - Nonagon Infinity

“Nonagon Infinity opens the door”

King Gizzard are not a band that are afraid to experiment. Every album is dedicated to some crazy off-the-wall idea and they fully commit themselves to make it work. In the hands of any other band, it would just be a bunch of gimmicks. But in their hands, it’s an entire playground of ideas and originality. In the case of Nonagon Infinity, they have effectlively made an endless loop of an album. It has no true beginning or finishing track, and every track blends together seamlessly. It’s an insteresting concept, sure, but if this was all there was to it, this album would not be just a one-note affair, something that most people wouldn’t give a second look. Luckily, King Gizzard know this, and made the album one of the fastest and hardest-rocking albums to come out in the entirety of 2016. From the very second it begins, you’re blasted by some pf the most energetic, catchy, and just plain fun songs the band have made to this date. It’s a flurry of fuzzy guitars, groovy basslines and powerhouse drumming. And that’s the magic of King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard: they don’t make an album an endless loop just to say they made an endless album, they make an amazing album, one that you could listen to over and over again, that just so happens to be an endless loop. That’s why it could only work in their hands.

8. Kaytranada - 99.9% 

“I’m here and I know y’all be waiting for me.”

You may or may not know Canadian producer Kaytranada for producing for the likes of Freddie Gibbs, Mick Jenkins, The Internet, among others. He’s always been great at creating groovy, easy-going beats, but he’s never really come out into his own. Until now. With a more than impressive debut, Kaytranada shows the world what he’s capable of and makes the case for being one of the best producers out there today. This is first and foremost a beats tape, with contributions from the likes of rapper Vic Mensa, singer Anderson .Paak, and even jazz quartet BADBADNOTGOOD. But these guests never feel like they’re the focus of the album. Instead, each of them feel more like elements that are mixed together into the groove of the album. Kaytranada takes their voices, their words, their instruments and waves them together with his own impossibly catchy melodies to create something that is truly greater than the sum of its parts. Every song here will get stuck in your head for at least a day, and they will very hardly leave. And I guarantee that no matter what, you’ll be left wanting more. 

7. Car Seat Headrest - Teens of Denial

“I didn’t want you to hear that shake in my voice, my pain is my own”

Will Toledo sings about what everyone else would rather not. Depression, social anxiety, failing to make something out of your life, you name it. True, he might not be the first to do so, but it doesn’t mean what he writes isn’t engaging or full of true, raw emotions. Finally free of the constrictions of lo-fi, Toledo takes advantage of it and expands upon his creativity, being loud, huge and bombastic when he needs to, and then going back to being tender and quiet, sometimes in the same song. He’s not the best singer, but for some reason his certainly unique voice works perfectly here. He also manages to add extra instruments, like horns or keyboards, and they complement the music perfectly. But it’s the fantastic songwriting that truly drives the album home for me. Yes, it can be sad and heartbreaking, but there’s moments of catharsis that make it feel like it’s okay to laugh at your own pain. And in the end, we’re all better for it. 

6. Bon Iver - 22, A Million 

“Philosophize your figure, what I have and haven’t held.”

Every once in a while comes an artist that with a single album alters everything about them. Their image, their sound, everything. Radiohead did it with Kid A, Talk Talk did it with The Colour of Spring, Primal Scream did it with Screamadelica, and now, Bon Iver have done it with 22, A Million. Even though Justin Vernon has subtly been evolving ever since he started the Bon Iver project (replacing the minimalistic sound of For Emma, Forever Ago with a full band on their self-titled album), and even though we’ve seen him collaborate with Kanye West on Yeezus, his most experimental album yet, I don’t think anyone was ready for this radical of a change. Replacing live instrumentation entirely, Vernon instead opts for glitchy soundscapes, manipulated samples of his own voice, and horns aplenty. Even his lyrics have changed, becoming even more cryptic than they already were in the past. But even though the instrumentation is weird and out there, and you never really know just what he’s talking about, Vernon still  manages to create something that resonates within you, and the emotions shine through. No matter where he goes next, I don’t have a doubt that it will still be incredible.

5. Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds - Skeleton Tree

“I move, you move, and one more time with feeling”

To say that Skeleton Tree might be Nick Cave’s most emotional album yet is saying a lot. Cave is known for making dark and generally disturbing music, but this record is dark for a very different reason. During the sessions for this album, Cave’s son Arthur tragically passed away. Even though no explicit mention or reference is made, this tragedy haunts the record. That sickening, oppresive feeling of loss lingers in every word and in the sparse, minimalistic production. And then, on the second half of the album, Cave turns his head from the darkness and starts looking towards the light. A ray of hope illuminates the back half of the album, simbolizing the beginning of a healing process. Musically, this album is the most minimalistic Cave has ever gotten. But what’s there is more than enough to convey exactly what needs to be conveyed. This is not an album of despair. It is an album of surviving through that despair and the peace of mind that comes with it. 

4. Radiohead - A Moon Shaped Pool 

“Broken hearts make it rain”

Thom Yorke and co. are no strangers to the feeling of deep sadness that accompanies loneliness. But on A Moon Shaped Pool, they dive deep within this feeling and produce their most depressing and heartwrenching set of tracks in a very long time. More than being simply emotional, A Moon Shaped Pool is the most human album that has come along in a while. The band, accompanied by Jonny Greenwood’s orchestral arrangements, wear their hearts on their sleeves, resulting in an album that’s mainly about love, or more specifically, what comes after it is gone, and what fills the void that’s left in its place. While album closer True Love Waits might be the most gentle song on the entire album, it’s also the heaviest in terms of what it’s saying. And unlike Skeleton Tree, there’s no comfort at the end of it.

3. David Bowie - Blackstar 

“Look up here, I’m in heaven”

When Blackstar came out, the world received a weird, ominous and cryptic album that talked about death, the afterlife, and all that you leave behind when you die. Two days later, we all understood why. More than an album, this is the final testament of an artist coming to terms with his own untimely passing and releasing one final parting gift. This album is chaotic, it’s nightmarish, at times profoundly sad, but in the end, if it truly is Bowie’s final goodbye, then it accomplishes what it sets out to do. One can choose to handle death in a number of ways. The way Bowie chose to do it is unusual, yes, but it feels like something that only he could have done, and it truly ends his decades-long career on a high note, leaving behind a legacy that few people can even hope to accomplish. R.I.P.

2. Danny Brown - Atrocity Exhibition

“Made 30 band in 30 minutes. Before I count it I done damn near spent it.”

This is, no contest, the single darkest album of the year. The Detroit rapper taps into something truly twisted and demented on a lot of tracks in this record. His usual themes of drug addiction, crime, poverty, and death take on an even more sinister turn paired with some of the beats in these songs. This album truly feels like a never-ending downwards spiral. One that just turns darker and more hopeless with every passing song. Danny raps his ass of through the pain, from the perspective of someone who has gone through this and knows what it brings all too well. He raps, more than anything else, from the perspective of someone who’s determined to live and survive through it if it kills him. 

1. Frank Ocean - Blonde

“I thought that I was dreaming when you said you loved me”

When Frank returned after a long four year hiatus with Blonde, he released something that did not resemble Channel Orange at all. Instead of the smooth R&B beats, the hooks, the guest verses, we got simple guitar lines, which, in most cases, make up the entirety of the songs’ instrumentations. Again, this is a sparse and minimalistic record, but in the abscence of extra instruments and sounds, the feelings truly shine. The lyrics in this album are, to put it simply, masterful. Dealing with youth, love, and identity, among other subjects, they all come together to create a near-perfect experience of an album that resonates hard within anyone who has ever been young and foolish, or even not that young anymore. It is, in a few words, the best album of 2016.