#like an entire dissertation

[ghostjelliess]

You know the slipper and the evil step mother, the cruel sisters and the ball, but what about the wishing tree, the dwindling inheritance, and how wicked-fast our heroine is when she runs away from her drunk prince?

Read it on ghostjellies.com

[egophiliac]

Since book 7 part 5 (the part where we meet Meleanor/Maleanor 👀) is coming to EN this month, i would love to see your take on lilia’s proposal to meleanor! i mean they were like little kids right? it couldn’t have been that serious…i think the only reason she even brought it up again is because she could tell lilia still genuinely loved her…(even if he didn’t realize it himself?) but, oh well! Let’s think about silly childhood shenanigans to numb the pain! ^_^ (orz)

oh shit?! get ready for a doozy guys, it's comiiiiiing ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

I chickened out of posting the whole thing (look, I get VERY carried away when it comes to these wacky kids and their Tragedy), but I do believe that it probably ended with Lilia getting embarrassed and just shoving the first thing he sees into his mouth to try and cover for it.

(we're just lucky it wasn't a frog this time)

[strwbrryfire]

back again with my meowstappen agenda

[erebusbored]

Guys I want her so bad it's not funny

[theatreslave]

I fully need you all to realize

in another universe, each and every one of us, is making Severus Snape stutter and blush.

[bitchassangels]

me—a lesbian who repressed my identity for over a decade, who used to brag about hooking up with men and even maintained a long-term serious relationship with one, who sought validation from family and society through those encounters and experiences, who thought somehow doing all of that would make me “normal” and “valuable” and “good”—watching dean winchester do literally anything: yeah…that guy’s a fruit. someone should tell him

[lemongogo]

im retiring from trigun

[caesxr]

if i look hot for my thesis presentation do you think they will forgive my crimes (writing 12k words about caesar)

[thegreatyin]

How would the Scoundrel react to Miss Emilia Stone, do you think? To give you an idea of who she is, the Threadbare Outrider is one of the alternate identities of Barnabus Moss, and possibly the closest to who he actually is - he's only still an egg because he's too busy with his job to give too much of a shit about being trans right now.

She is functionally the Hyde identity; open revolutionary, Parabolan wanderer, purveyor of extreme and generally unnecessary violence. I also considered naming her the Extremely Unlicensed Silverer - she has never actually fulfilled the requirements to become a proper silverer (she thinks the sunglasses look kind of dumb) but she offers equivalent services for cut-rate prices to people who can't afford a "real professional."

In terms of her actual personality, she is... frighteningly happy. To steal a phrase, she wields her joy like a hammer; judiciously and with great violence. Moss is basically drunk on life whenever he's her, and it very much shows. She is a release valve on all of his life's worries - whenever he gets too pissed off at his life as Moss or Haversham or the spy, he can just duck into Parabola and gut a few chessmen with a meathook to unwind.

Correspondingly, he gets really irritated under the hood when she has to act consistent with the persona rather than how he actually feels - for example, Emilia is the kind of person who doesn't really dislike anyone, so when someone pisses him off she can't really show it without breaking the cheer, and it is thoroughly upsetting to him.

I think original flavour Moss would probably be fascinated by the Scoundrel, from a professional standpoint - he has a degree in the Correspondence and the whole bat thing is very interesting - whilst simultaneously being deeply, deeply exhausted by the man's life choices. Meanwhile I think Emilia would enjoy doing this to him.

Thoughts?

first of all, love the OC dissertation, chewing ur little guy like a gummy bear as we speak

second of all, the scoundrel would probably react the same as they always do- with overwhelmingly smug manners and more than a little bit of "i'm better than you and i'm being generous and indulging you by existing in your presence"... at least at first.

depending on how their interactions go from there, the scoundrel would either be delightfully open to infodumping about the bat thing to the point of tedium, or needlessly spiteful for Literally No Reason aside from a vague sense of pettiness and jealousy. how dare she get to be so damnably happy all the time, how dare she act so damnably carefree about it, etcetera etcetera. whether or not they'd like to admit it, i could see them holding a grudge against emilia purely on the principle of (supposedly) having everything they've ever wanted.

which is to say, they absolutely get scrunched like a cat, and they are biting her + biting her + biting her + biting her + biting her + biting her + biting her + biting her + biting her + biting her + biting her + biting her + biting her + biting her + biting her + b

[rist-ix]

Hi Rist!!

Okay, so I’m pretty sure I already know the answer, but on a scale of “someone’s going to die” to “everyone’s going to die” how angry would Sparked!Valtor be if, after an argument, Bloom slept with someone to get back at him?

Like, this is during one of VERY rare times he isn’t watching her and it’s a one night stand with a random guy whose name she doesn’t know that she met at a bar/party. Someone she’s never going to meet again.

AND, as a “fun” little bonus, she flaunts the marks he left while she’s transformed and fighting Valtor.

No idea where this idea came from but I want the chaos and possible murder, so yeah. Also hope you’re doing well and life and school are being nice to you! 💙

Eden you are a menace and I love u

And as always the answer is: IT DEPENDS! my law course prof would be so proud of me rn

Mainly, it depends on the timing. If it’s in the first few chapters, he'd be his usual “someone's gonna die” kinda mad, and that someone is the poor unfortunate soul Bloom deemed sexy enough for a one night stand. RIP bozo u really didn’t do anything wrong but alas

On the other hand!!! Valtor LOVES to be the cause for her actions. He THRIVES knowing that Bloom does anything because of him, that he has any kind of direct influence on her. It's entirely possible his reaction would sum up to “she's a little confused, but she's got the spirit!” Additionally, he's never really jealous per se, in Sparked. He thinks Sky is boring and is insulted that Bloom — HIS equal and nemesis! — would waste time on her boyfriend when she could be hunting him instead. And later it’s more that he hates how much Bloom genuinely cares for him, not that he would really acknowledge that. Since I think he's somewhat casual about sex I don’t even think he would be that mad about a one night stand if he can tell himself that really, she was thinking of him all along. The thing that would really set him off is if Bloom entered a serious relationship with someone he deems actually competent and potentially worthy of her, like Stella, because THAT would be a threat. THAT would actually require him to commit copious amounts of crimes, right the fuck now before this gets any worse. Fuck.

If we're talking post Eraklyon tho, that man is unhinged and repressed and entirely too ready for violence, u give him any reason at all to feel slighted and he will start stabbing people. If Bloom looks at any attractive individual for a second too long he will have a breakdown. What does a man have to DO to become his enemy's center of the world and sole raison d'être? Srsly Bloom, he's asking.

[kirkwallguy]

please be aware that for every hater post i make i am writing a paragraph of horrible handers fic in my notes app

[mcrmve]

a person: hi

me: DOROHEDORO ON TOP FAVE OF ALL TIME

them:

[asurrogateblog]

as a media psychology researcher 85% of my job is figuring out the most horrifically academic way to say "you idiots wouldn't last a day on tumblr"

[thawthebeez]

oikage......... if you carry the one and factor out a four... are a manifestation of the thin line between admiration and jealousy .... i've solved it....🚬

[bijouxcarys]

Dustin Hoffman is an underrated hottie. Fight me.

[otrtbs]

full transparency nothing is getting written rn bc,,, well,, my computer ,,,,, she died ,,, dead. and she’s at the necromancer (apple store) rn and will be revived from the dead in a week or two (at least that’s what they tell me) but yeah. sorry. rip my computer. 🪦🥀